#so I've set it aside for now to work on something fresh
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scarapanna · 4 months ago
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[WIP] Some more updates!!!
I've been quiet recently, but got a bunch of stuff in the works for y'all!!
I'm still working on those paper puppets for a little project regarding intertwined opposites (Possibly one of the most ambitious things I've ever worked on so far) and found a proper way to introduce that new au I'm working on!!
Here are two more paper puppets for the big pmv
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And a few sneak peaks for the new au!!
(Doodles+notes alongside a silly little meme with a sprite edit of pewpaw)
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I'm working on an info post for it, progress has been slow however since I wanna prioritize the pmv again (Started it on june, stagnated a long period, and went back to work on it. I'm dead set on finishing it this summer AND stubborn/silly).
[Personal reminder: Beetle stop starting wips when you're already busy/silly]
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hoe4hotchner · 22 days ago
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I didn’t know I needed inked!Hotch until now!
Would you ever do a part 2 where he comes home with a tattoo designed specially for reader added to his sleeve? Or maybe somewhere more personal on him?
New addition | [A.H]
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Pairing: inked!Hotch x gn!Reader
CW: tattoos, fluff
WC: 0.6k
Summary: Hotch gets a new tattoo
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           The soft hum of music filled the living room as you curled up on the couch, a warm cup of tea cradled in your hands. The sun had just begun to set, casting a golden glow through the windows. It was a peaceful evening - you cherished the time alone, sometimes needing to sit in silence without a word spoken - until you heard the familiar sound of keys jingling at the door.
           Aaron stepped inside, his suit jacket slung over one arm and a curious smile playing on his lips. "Hey," he greeted, his eyes lighting up as they met yours.
           "Hey yourself," you replied, setting your mug on the table. "You're home early. Everything okay?"
           "Everything's perfect," he assured, leaning down to place a soft kiss on your forehead. But there was something different about him - a hint of excitement he was trying to contain.
           You raised a brow, noticing that his sleeves were rolled down and buttoned at the cuffs, which was unusual for him at home. "Long day?" you asked, gesturing to his unrolled sleeves.
           He glanced at his wrists and chuckled softly. "Actually, I have something to show you."
           Curiosity piqued, you sat up straighter. "Oh? What is it?"
           Aaron set his jacket aside and took a seat next to you. Slowly, he began unbuttoning the cuff of his left sleeve, carefully rolling it up to reveal the familiar swirl of intricate tattoos that adorned his forearm. Your eyes widened as you noticed a fresh addition covered in plastic - a new design nestled seamlessly among the existing ink.
           Your breath caught as you took in the delicate details. It was a beautiful rendering of a compass with a rose intertwined with your initials. The compass points were intricately shaded, and tiny, meaningful symbols were etched into each direction.
           "Aaron…" you whispered, your fingers gently tracing the new tattoo. "You got this… for me?"
           He nodded, his gaze soft and filled with affection. "I wanted to carry a part of you with me wherever I go," he said quietly. "You navigate me through the chaos."
           Emotion welled up inside you, and you felt a warmth spread through your chest. "It's incredible. I don't know what to say."
           He smiled gently. "You don't have to say anything. Just know how much you mean to me."
           You looked up into his eyes, seeing the sincerity and love reflected there. "When did you do this?"
           "During lunch today," he admitted with a small chuckle. "I've been working with the artist for weeks to get it just right."
           A playful smirk crossed your face. "So that's why you've been sneaking out and being all mysterious lately."
           He laughed, the sound sending a pleasant thrill through you. "Guilty as charged."
           You leaned in, pressing a soft kiss against his lips. "Thank you," you murmured. "It's the most thoughtful thing anyone has ever done for me."
           He rested his forehead against yours. "You inspire me," he whispered. "It felt right to make it a part of me - just like you've become."
           You sat together in comfortable silence, your hand resting over the new ink. After a moment, a mischievous glint sparkled in your eyes. "You know, this means I get artistic input on any future tattoos."
           He raised an eyebrow playfully. "Oh, does it now?"
           "Absolutely," you teased. "I might just have a few ideas."
           He chuckled, wrapping an arm around you. "I'm open to suggestions - as long as I get to choose the placement."
           "Deal," you agreed, snuggling closer to him.
           "Maybe next time, we can get matching ones," you suggested softly.
           He looked down at you, his eyes reflecting the soft glow of the room. "I'd like that," he replied. "Very much."
           You smiled, pressing a kiss to his cheek. "It's a date, then."
           "Definitely a date," he agreed, holding you a little tighter.
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orchidniins · 8 months ago
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oh i NEED pt 2 of Serendipitous Beginnings🙏
Serendipitous Beginnings Pt. 2 | Arthur Frederick
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Summary: Y/N and Arthur finally spend some much time together and go on their first date. Between movie nights and cute museum dates, it's clear they've fallen hard for each other. Pairings: ArthurTV x afab!Reader Warnings: Mature content, Smut, Fluff Word Count: 6k
A/N: Thanks to everyone who showed love on my first post! I wanted to write a part 2 for this with all the cute little ideas in my head. This fic is basically a little collection of events and just a little sprinkle of smut right at the end. I hope you enjoy!
Masterlist ⟡ Part 1
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
You awaken on Saturday, later than your usual wake-up time, feeling a faint headache throbbing behind your temples. Despite the headache, your mind is abuzz with the memories of last night's conversations with Arthur. The lingering memories of the night's events are still fresh in your mind.
As you reach for your phone, a smile tugs at the corner of your lips, eager to see if Arthur had messaged you. Sure enough, his name lights up your screen, and you can't help but feel a rush of happiness as you read his message. The two of you had stayed up pretty much all night texting, the conversation flowing effortlessly between you.
Eventually, it was mutually decided to stop texting and finally catch some sleep, but now, even with maybe only two hours of sleep, you're still buzzing with excitement to keep the conversation going. You couldn't help but grin at your phone, fingers tapping out quick replies
Arthur: Hey! Morning! 😊 Arthur: Did you manage to get any sleep in? Y/N: Hey! Good Morning 😊 Y/N: Yeah, I did. Just barely. Did you sleep well? Arthur: Yeah, I managed to get a few hours in too. Couldn't stop thinking about our conversation though. Y/N: Haha, same here! I guess we'll just have to continue it in person, huh? 😉 Arthur: Did you wanna maybe grab some lunch today? Y/N: That sounds great! I'd love to. Where were you thinking? Arthur: How about that place we talked about yesterday? Y/N: Perfect! Can't wait 😊
Eagerly agreeing to meet Arthur for lunch, excitement courses through you at the thought of spending more time with him. However, as you're about to set your phone down, a sinking feeling settles in the pit of your stomach. You had completely forgotten about your plans with Sienna to meet up with a mutual friend who was in town for the weekend.
Y/N: Hey, Arthur! I'm so sorry, but something's come up for today. Can we reschedule for tomorrow? Arthur: Oh, no worries! Tomorrow won't work for me, I've got a shoot scheduled. Y/N: Ah, got it. No problem. Maybe another time then? Arthur: Definitely! Let's figure something out soon. 😊
After a bit more back-and-forth, the conversation trails off, leaving you feeling disappointed that your plans with Arthur didn't pan out. With a sigh, you set your phone aside and get out of bed, heading towards Sienna's bedroom to check in on her.
Entering her room, you find her sprawled out on the bed, half of her body hanging off the edge, her hair messy and makeup smeared. You try to wake her up gently, but she protests, murmuring, "No, not yet, five more minutes."
"Siii," you say, nudging her shoulder, "you know I turned down a date for this lunch today, so you better get up, or I'm gonna have to use violence." Sienna groans in response, still half-asleep, but your mention of a date piques her interest. "A date? What do you mean, a date?" she asks, her eyes fluttering open as she tries to grasp the situation.
You chuckle at her confusion. "I was just kidding, but we better make it to that café on time. You're the one who insisted we go there, even if it's a 50-minute drive from here. Now, get up." Sienna, still groggy, fixates on the idea of a date. "Okay, but what date?" she mumbles, her words slurred with sleep.
With a laugh, you shake your head and say, "Nothing, just get ready," before leaving her room to get ready yourself.
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Over the next few days, despite the promise to meet up, neither you nor Arthur seemed to find the time. It had been over a week since the initial plan was made, and your schedules were keeping you both occupied. Arthur had spent a few days away from London for a shoot, while your own commitments to classes, coursework, and your TA job filled your days from dawn till dusk.
The conversation between you over text seemed to flow effortlessly though. Whether it was during breaks between classes or late at night after a long day of work, hours slipped by unnoticed as you traded stories, shared interests, and laughed at each other's jokes. Even through the screen, you felt like there was undeniable chemistry.
In person, however, it was a different story. Whenever you crossed paths with Arthur in person, whether for the few minutes you had while entering or leaving your apartment, the atmosphere became charged with a hint of awkwardness. Your face-to-face interactions were tinged with an unspoken tension. Probably owing to the fact that neither of you had addressed the hot and steamy kiss shared the other night, leaving many unanswered questions. And neither of you knew how to broach the subject, leaving the issue lingering between you like an elephant in the room.
Today, you're rushing out of your apartment, a whirlwind of activity as you stuff papers into your backpack, your mind preoccupied with the evening class you volunteered to handle for a professor.
You stand outside the elevator, tapping your foot impatiently, waiting for the doors to open. As they slide open, you're about to step in when you're met with Arthur's smiling face.
"Hey," Arthur greets you warmly, his eyes brightening at the sight of you.
"Hey," you reply, mustering a smile as you step into the elevator beside him.
"How're things going?" Arthur asks, his voice laced with genuine interest.
"All good," you respond, offering a brief nod. "Just heading to TA for an evening class."
Arthur nods in understanding. "You've been pretty occupied lately, huh?"
You chuckle softly. "Yeah, well you know… Where are you off to?"
"I'm meeting some friends for a drink.", Arthur responds.
"That sounds fun," you say, though inwardly you can't help but feel a twinge of disappointment that your paths are diverging once again.
The elevator ride continues in silence, the awkward tension lingering between you like a thick fog. You bite your tongue, racking your brain for something to say to break the uneasy atmosphere. Finally, just as the elevator doors slide open, you blurt out, "Are you free tomorrow night?"
Arthur's eyebrows raise in surprise. "Um, I think so," he replies, sounding intrigued.
"I was thinking of having a movie marathon," you explain, feeling a surge of nervous energy. "And I was hoping to have someone along for it."
A hint of a smile plays at the corners of Arthur's lips. "That sounds like a plan," he says, his eyes brightening with interest. "What were you thinking of watching?"
You grin, feeling a sense of relief wash over you. "How about 'The Lord of the Rings'?" you suggest eagerly.
Arthur's eyes light up at the suggestion. "Yes! I love Lord of the Rings. Have you watched the extended versions? If not, we could watch those," he says, genuine excitement in his voice.
Just as excited, you reply, "Yeah! I’d love that."
"Great, sounds like a plan," Arthur confirms with enthusiasm.
Feeling a weight lift off your shoulders, you say, "My place tomorrow? I’ll text you the time."
"Definitely. I'll see you then," Arthur replies.
With that, you bid Arthur goodbye as you step out of the elevator, feeling a sense of excitement building in your chest. Maybe this movie marathon would finally give you the chance to address the elephant in the room and see where things could go with Arthur. But your thoughts are interrupted by the fact that you didn't want to be late to set up for class. You wave him goodbye and head out.
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Before you know it, the day of your movie night arrives. You make sure to stock up on snacks and drinks, preparing for a cozy evening. With Sienna out of the city for work till next week, you have the place all to yourself. You take the time to set up the couch with extra pillows and grab an additional blanket from Sienna's room, ensuring everything is just right for your evening with Arthur.
However, for a fleeting moment, you can't help but overthink why you're going to such lengths. It's not like this was a date, just two friends hanging out. But you quickly brush off the thought when you hear a knock on your door. Taking a deep breath to shake off the nerves, you stride over to the door and swing it open, revealing Arthur standing on the other side.
"Hey!" he greets you with a warm smile, holding up a bag of snacks. "I brought some snacks for movie night. Hope you like popcorn and chocolate!"
You return his smile, feeling relieved at the sight of him. "That's perfect! Come on in," you say, stepping aside to let him enter. "I've set up the living room for our movie marathon. Make yourself at home."
As Arthur steps in, you close the door behind him, trying your best to calm your nerves. Tonight was supposed to be fun, you remind yourself, a simple movie watching experience between friends. Definitely not a date, just two friends hanging out.
You settle onto the couch, gesturing for Arthur to join you. He takes off his jacket and joins you. There's a brief moment of silence as you both get comfortable, but you're determined to keep the atmosphere light.
"So, how's your week been?" you asked, turning to Arthur in an attempt to break the awkward silence.
Arthur leaned back against the cushions, a thoughtful expression crossing his features. "Kind of busy," he replied with a chuckle. "Filming schedules have been hectic lately, but it's been pretty fun filming with my mates. How about you?"
You shrugged, a wry smile playing on your lips. "Same old, same old. Classes, TA gig, grading papers, dealing with undergrads….," You trail off, not wanting to bore him with the details of your day-to-day responsibilities.
But Arthur seems genuinely interested. "I bet you're great at it though," he says, leaning closer, his eyes sparkling with sincerity.
You feel a warmth spread through you at his words, grateful for his encouragement. "Haha, thanks, Arthur," you reply, a smile tugging at the corners of your lips, your eyes locked with his.
As the movie progressed, you found yourselves immersed in discussing your favorite scenes and characters. The initial awkwardness began to dissipate, replaced by an easy flow of conversation and laughter, and soon the movie became nothing more than background noise.
Before long, you realized that as the conversation flowed, you were sitting much closer to Arthur. Your knees brushed against each other as you faced one another on the couch. His arm draped over the back, his fingers lightly grazing your shoulder, sending delightful shivers down your spine.
Lost in the moment, you couldn't help but wonder why you had ever felt awkward around him in the first place. It felt as though the universe had conspired to bring you together. The desire to kiss him again bubbled up inside you, igniting a warmth that spread through your entire being.
With each passing second, it became increasingly difficult to ignore the palpable tension between you, leaving you hopeful that perhaps Arthur felt the same way.
In the silence that followed, the air between you seemed charged with anticipation. Slowly, almost hesitantly, the two of you leaned in towards each other, the space between you narrowing with each heartbeat.
His gaze met yours, "This feels familiar," Arthur murmured, breaking the silence. You couldn't help but laugh, relieved that at least one of you had acknowledged it.
"Does it now?" you replied, a playful grin tugging at the corners of your lips. "So, you do remember."
"How could I forget?" Arthur's voice was barely above a whisper, his words sending a shiver down your spine. "It's been on my mind ever since."
As he leaned in closer, a surge of excitement coursed through you. "Well, good then," you replied, your heart pounding in your chest. Without hesitation, his lips meet yours.
You shifted closer, your hands finding their way to his shoulders, his arms wrapping around your waist, pulling you into him. With a gentle but firm grip, he pulled you onto his lap, your bodies fitting together perfectly as if they were meant to be intertwined. The warmth of his touch sent a jolt of electricity through your body.
You melt into each other in a passionate kiss, the world around you seems to fade away, leaving only the two of you in your own private universe. His lips were soft, moving with a rhythm that matched yours. With each brush of his lips, it sends the blood rushing down to your core.
Lost in the heat of the kiss, you pressed yourself closer to him. Tangling your hands in his soft hair, savoring the feeling of his arms around you, the warmth of his body against yours.
When you finally pulled away, breathless, you found yourself lost in his gaze, unable to tear your eyes away from his. And you couldn’t remember the last time someone looked at you with such intensity.
As you both caught your breath, a wave of relief washed over you, the tension that had been building between you finally dissipating. With a gentle smile, he breaks the silence, his voice soft but determined. "Let me take you on a proper date," he says, his eyes never leaving yours.
"Okay," you chuckle softly, feeling excited at his words, a fluttering in your stomach as you look back at him. "I’m free this Friday," you reply, your voice filled with warmth. With a playful smile, you lean in and give him a little peck on the lips.
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You were thrilled when Arthur suggested meeting at the history museum after class, eagerly looking forward to spending time together. You even took the extra effort to dress up a bit for the occasion. However, as you hurriedly made your way there, excitement turned to frustration as you realized you were running late. The class you were assisting in had unexpectedly extended, leaving you racing against time as the museum's closing hour approached. You quickly texted Arthur, apologizing for the delay and assured him that you were on your way, determined to make it there as soon as possible.
Y/N: Hey, sorry I'm running a bit late 😅 Y/N: Class ran over, but I'll be there soon! Arthur: No worries at all. I'm just glad you can make it Arthur: Take your time 😊
With determination, you quicken your pace, determined not to let the opportunity slip away. As you finally arrive at the museum, you spot Arthur waiting patiently outside the entrance. He looks great, dressed in a nice crewneck sweatshirt and black cargos, it makes your heart skip a beat at just how good he looked.
You hurry over to him, eager to make up for lost time. "Hey!" you exclaim, a wide smile spreading across your face as you reach him.
"Hey," Arthur greets you warmly, his eyes lighting up with genuine delight at the sight of you. He opens his arms, inviting you into a warm embrace.
You gladly accept the hug, reveling in his warmth and the comforting scent of his cologne. "Sorry I'm late," you say softly, pulling away slightly to meet his gaze.
Arthur shakes his head, a reassuring smile playing on his lips. "No need to apologize. I'm just happy you're here now," he assures you, his voice filled with warmth.
You feel a surge of relief at his response. "Thanks for waiting," you say gratefully, reaching out to give his hand a reassuring squeeze.
Arthur squeezes your hand back, his touch sending a jolt of electricity through you. "Of course, it's no problem. We can always do something else if the museum's closed," he suggests, ever the considerate gentleman, despite the museum being almost 15 mins past closing.
But you shake your head, determined not to let the evening go to waste. "No, no, just trust me on this," you insist.
Arthur raises an eyebrow, intrigued by your enthusiasm. "Alright… I trust you," he says with a smile, willing to go along with your plan.
With a grin, you take Arthur's hand and lead him towards the side entrance of the museum. As you walk, you quickly glance at your phone to confirm the last-minute plans one final time, the ones you made on the subway over, sending a quick text message. Then, slipping your phone back into your pocket, you look up to flash Arthur a smile, and he returns it with warmth in his eyes.
You head to the side entrance and spot your friend. Waving enthusiastically, you exchange greetings and shake hands, expressing your gratitude once again. "Thank you again, I owe you big time," you say appreciatively.
"Not a problem at all," your friend responds warmly as he lets the two of you in "Anything for a friend. Just make sure to leave before 8 p.m."
You nod in agreement and turn to Arthur, excitement bubbling within you as you lead him inside. His curious gaze prompts you to explain the situation. "That guy was an old graduate advisor of mine," you begin, a smile tugging at the corners of your lips. "He's works here as a curator now."
Arthur's eyes widen with interest as he looks around, taking in the museum's atmosphere. "I have to say… that’s quite impressive," he remarks, a mischievous twinkle in his eyes.
"Yeah, his job's pretty cool," you reply, nodding in agreement.
But Arthur interrupts you before you can say anything further. "No, not that… you. You are quite surprising… in a good way," he adds with a playful smirk, his hand still holding yours. You feel a blush creeping up to your cheeks at his compliment.
You chuckle softly, feeling shy at his words, "Just give me more time to impress you further with my wildly interesting mind," you playfully quip, unable to contain the grin that spreads across your face.
Arthur's smile widens in response, his eyes sparkling with amusement as he admires your playful banter.
Turning away to hide your embarrassment, you reply, "Anyways, we have two hours now… best not waste any time," as you pull him towards the main hall.
The museum is bathed in the soft glow of a few lights, casting a gentle ambiance over the now empty hall. Excitement courses through you as you eagerly lead Arthur around, pointing out each exhibit with enthusiasm. Arthur listens intently, his eyes filled with genuine interest as he witnesses how passionate you sound.
With each second passing, he finds himself increasingly impressed by just how intelligent you are, finding himself melting at each of your words.
He often found himself just looking at you, mesmerized by your beauty, and sometimes forgetting to even glance at the displays. It still felt surreal to him that you were here with him right now.
"You know," you share, a hint of nostalgia coloring your voice, "when I was a kid, my dad used to bring me here whenever he had work in the city. He’d always bring me along with him."
"It's always been one of my favorite places in London," you conclude with a smile.
Arthur smiles warmly, his admiration evident as he responds, "I can see why."
As the two of you continue to explore the halls, the world outside the museum fades away, leaving you in your own private sanctuary. Stolen glances, brushes of hands, and a shared electricity fill the air, making this the most enjoyable date you've ever had.
As the evening progresses, you find yourselves completely immersed in each other's company, sharing stories and laughing without a care in the world. Arthur's admiration for you grows with each passing moment, his heart feeling lighter in your presence. Lost in the magic of the moment, you both find yourselves laughing and running around the museum halls, creating memories that will last a lifetime. Arthur captures candid photos of you, the echoes of your laughter filling the empty corridors.
Caught up in the magic of the moment, Arthur can't help but stare at you with admiration, his eyes drinking in your beauty. You stand before a display of jade artifacts, leaning closer to examine the intricate details, while sharing a story about a similar find or an excavation you volunteered on last year. "This is fascinating, isn’t it?" you remark, turning to Arthur with a sparkle in your eyes.
As you await his response, you're met with a lingering gaze, his eyes intense and unwavering. Feeling a warmth spread across your cheeks, you can't help but inquire with a small chuckle, "What?"
"You know," he begins, his voice soft with sincerity, "you're absolutely stunning."
You chuckle at his compliment, feeling a warm blush spread across your cheeks. "Oh, stop it," you tease, playfully nudging him. "You're not so bad yourself."
His gaze remains fixed on you, his expression filled with genuine affection. "I mean it," he insists, his voice barely above a whisper. "You're truly amazing."
You meet his gaze, feeling a flutter of excitement in your chest. "Well, I guess I can't argue with that," you joke, a playful grin tugging at the corners of your lips. "But I must say, you're not so bad at dishing out compliments either." You pause, your tone softening. "Thanks, Arthur."
Arthur smiles warmly, his eyes reflecting the sincerity of his words. "Anytime," he replies, his hand squeezing yours gently. "I just call it like I see it."
With a contented sigh, you fully face him now, reveling in the comfortable silence that envelops you both. The quiet of the museum amplifies the intimacy of the moment, and you find yourself drawn to Arthur, his presence filling you with warmth and affection.
Arthur leans in closer, his heart pounding in his chest as he presses a soft kiss to your lips. As he pulls away slightly, his breath tickling your skin.
You smile back at him, your cheeks flushed as your hand finds the back of his head, gently pulling him closer. As your lips meet his, you eagerly return the kiss, losing yourself in the sensation of his lips against yours. In that moment, nothing else matters, not caring about the passing time or potential interruptions.
As you reluctantly pull away, a soft smile plays on your lips. "It's getting late," you murmur, glancing at your watch. "A lot later than we were supposed to stay."
Arthur rests his forehead against yours, smiling down at you. "Okay, let's head back," he suggests, his voice tinged with a hint of disappointment.
"But hey, how about we grab dinner on the way back?" you suggest, a playful glint lighting up Arthur's eyes as he nods eagerly.
With a smile, you reach for his hand, intertwining your fingers as you make your way out of the museum. As you walk, you take a moment to text your friend, expressing your gratitude for letting the two of you sneak in and apologizing for overstaying your welcome.
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After leaving the museum, the two of you walked a few blocks to a cozy restaurant nearby, to grab some food before you sadly had to end your date. The warm glow of the restaurant's interior welcomed you as you stepped inside, finding a quiet corner to enjoy your meal together.
As you savored each bite and shared lighthearted conversation, it became evident that neither of you were quite ready to end the evening just yet. With a reluctant sigh, you eventually found yourselves back in the lobby of your apartment building, waiting for the elevator to arrive.
The anticipation hung heavy in the air as you stood side by side, nerves buzzing beneath the surface. Unable to resist the urge any longer, you finally turned to Arthur, your voice tinged with nervousness. "Do you want to come back to mine?" you asked, your heart pounding in your chest.
Arthur's gaze met yours, his eyes reflecting a hint of apprehension. Slowly, he nodded his head, his own nerves evident.
He had been to your place before, but tonight felt different, the stakes somehow higher, or perhaps that was just the horny part of his brain taking over. He wanted nothing more than to be glued by your side, yet he also wanted to be respectful of your boundaries, especially after the wonderful time you had today.
A nervous chuckle escaped him as he tried to ease the tension. "I'd love to," he replied with a slight voice crack. You couldn't help but laugh, your laughter bubbling up uncontrollably, joined by his as you both shared in the moment, breaking the tension that had settled between you.
As soon as you and Arthur step into your apartment, the door closes behind you with a soft click, enveloping you both in the intimate glow of the dimly lit space. The air feels somewhat thicker, and though you had spent quite a cute and romantic evening, all you could think about was just how much you wanted him right now.
As if on autopilot, your body moves on its own accord. You close the distance between you in an instant, pressing your lips against his. Your hands instinctively find their way to his firm chest, while his slowly rise to grasp your waist, pulling you closer as you usher him further into the apartment. The kiss is hungry and urgent, reflecting the desire between you two.
You continue to kiss each other, your lips locked in a fervent kiss. Occasionally, you break apart just long enough to catch your breath. As the heat between you grows, your hands roam eagerly.
In the midst of your passionate exchange, you manage to breathe out a whispered "Bedroom," your warm breath grazing his skin, sending shivers down his spine. Without hesitation, you both stumble together towards the bedroom, both of you equally as eager.
Once you're in your bedroom, you guide him to sit on the edge of the bed, your movements fluid and confident. You position yourself between his legs, feeling the heat radiating from his body as his hands find their place on your hips, pulling you closer.
You lean in, capturing his lips again, igniting a fiery passion between you. His hands trail up the back of your shirt, leaving tingles in their wake as you deepen the kiss, your fingers tangling in his soft, fluffy hair.
With newfound boldness, his hands move down to your ass, giving it a teasing squeeze that sends a jolt of electricity through you, before he trails his hands down to the back of your thighs.
Arthur pulls you onto his lap, a low hum escaping his lips as you shuffle over his growing arousal. You bite down on his bottom lip, a gasp escaping you as you feel the hardness beneath his clothes. "God, Arthur," you breathe out, your voice heavy with desire as his hands continue to knead the soft flesh of your thighs.
As your shirts come off in the heat of the moment, your hands eagerly explore his body, tracing every contour and eliciting soft groans from him. His mouth and tongue muffle your shuddering gasp as you grind yourself against his clothed crotch, the friction sending waves of pleasure coursing through both of you. Your kisses grow more passionate, tongues intertwining, exploring each other's mouths desperately.
You pant out his name, your body overtaken by the intense sensation, but Arthur suddenly pulls away from the kiss and grips your hips firmly, halting your movements. Confusion clouds your expression, wondering if this wasn't what he wanted after all.
He notices the flicker of self-doubt in your eyes, his hand instinctively reaching up to tuck a loose strand of hair behind your ear, his smile as reassuring as ever. "Don't worry, darling," he begins, his voice gentle yet earnest. "I love what we're doing, don’t get me wrong…big fan of sex, and you are incredibly sexy. But I just want to make sure you know that I like you very much, Y/n. I mean, really like you. This is more than just something physical for me. I love spending time with you, and I think you are one of the most beautiful women I have ever had the opportunity to lay my eyes on."
You melt at his heartfelt words, a blush creeping up on your cheeks at his sincerity. Arthur's genuine expression reassures you, his intent clear as day. It's endearing how he takes the time to ensure there's no doubt in your mind about his feelings.
You reach for his face, holding it gently between your hands as you stare deeply into his captivating eyes. "I really like you too, you know," you admit, sincerity echoing in your voice. "I don't just jump into bed with any odd guy." A smile dances on your lips as you share a brief moment of understanding, sealing it with a small kiss on the tip of his nose.
As you pull back, his fingers linger on your waist for a few seconds, sending goosebumps rippling across your skin in a sweet, tingling sensation.
As you resume kissing, your hands begin to trail down to the button of his trousers, starting to undo them. But once again, Arthur stops you, gently pulling away from your embrace. "Wait," he murmurs, his voice low and husky, "Lay down on your back for me."
You comply, as Arthur gently moves you off of him, the anticipation building as you settle onto the bed, watching intently as Arthur moves closer. With ease, he helps you slide off your jeans and panties, his touch sending tingles down your spine, each moment feeling more intimate than the last.
Once you're fully exposed before him, Arthur takes a moment to admire the sight before him, his gaze filled with desire and admiration. He begins to remove his own clothes, his movements deliberate yet filled with an undeniable hunger.
The atmosphere in the room shifted from one of urgency and desperation to something lighter and sweeter. He leaned over you, his touch gentle and reassuring as he positioned himself between your legs. With one hand resting softly on your hip and the other providing support beside you, he lowered his head to spread kisses along your body. Each touch of his lips spreads a heat throughout your body, making you even wetter than you already were.
As his lips found their way to your breast, a soft sigh escaped your lips. Arthur's mouth moved with a practiced rhythm, his movements calculated to elicit the sweetest of moans from you. With each kiss and gentle suckle, he drew out your pleasure, his touch igniting a fire within you that burned hotter with each passing moment.
His lips trailed from your breast to your neck, peppering delicate kisses along the sensitive skin. Finding a spot that made you gasp and arch your back, he lingered there, his ministrations drawing out a deep, primal moan from deep within you. He had surely left a mark, something that you would have to worry about covering up tomorrow.
Arthur shifts slightly, supporting himself as he rises, granting you an enticing view of his hard cock. With a few quick pumps of his hand, he looks at you, both your eyes glazed with undeniable lust. Without a word, he poses the question, "Condom?"
Your body slightly moves to the side and your hand reaches instinctively to the nightstand drawer, quickly retrieving a foil packet. You tear it open, pulling out the condom. As you carefully slide it down his throbbing length, a soft groan escapes him, his body responding eagerly to your gentle touch.
The anticipation hangs heavy in the air as the two of you lock eyes, dark with desire. You search his eyes for any hint of hesitation or doubt, but all you find is pure admiration reflected back at you. And in that moment, there was no need for words, you knew how much you craved each other.
He gently rubs the tip of his cock against you. Your eyes shut tight, a soft moan escaping your lips as you feel the sensation of his cock exploring your wet folds.
Arthur's voice breaks through the haze of desire as he asks, "Ready?" You nod eagerly in response, your body craving the intimate connection that only he can provide. With a gentle thrust, he enters you, eliciting a gasp of pleasure from your lips. Your hands instinctively grip his shoulders for support, while his hands firmly grasp your hips, guiding each rhythmic movement with care.
You pant out his name between breathy moans, the sound reverberating in the air as he continues to thrust into you. "Arthur," you gasp.
He pauses, his movements slowing, and he looks down at you with genuine concern. "Is this okay?" he asks softly, his eyes searching yours for any hint of discomfort. In that moment, the connection between you felt deeper than mere physicality and it all started to feel more intimate and meaningful.
He waits for your response, his breath mingling with yours as he gazes into your eyes. When you nod in affirmation, a wave of relief washes over his face. With a tender smile, he resumes his movements, each stroke of his cock against you more passionate and deliberate than the last.
Arthur murmurs, "Y/N, you feel absolutely amazing, darling," as he grunts with each slow thrust, a subtle force behind each movement now, hitting your sweet spot deliciously.
You grip his shoulders tighter, your voice a low moan. "Fuck, Arthur."
Your moans and grunts intertwine, echoing throughout the empty apartment as the two of you become lost in each other.
Arthur rests his forehead against yours, his movements still steady as he continues to pleasure you. A soft smile graces his lips as he whispers, "You're so beautiful, Y/N," planting a gentle kiss on your forehead.
Your mind swims in a sea of pleasure, every sensation heightened as you surrender to the moment.
Arthur maintains his pace, gradually speeding up as the intensity between you heightens. Each movement feels like a perfect fit, as if your bodies were made to intertwine in this exact moment. As you feel your orgasm approaching, you can't help but release a string of uncontrollable moans, "Shit, Arthur, I'm close."
Arthur slows his pace slightly, his thrusts becoming deeper and more intense with each movement. You can feel him filling you completely, sending waves of pleasure coursing through your body. "Me too," he responds breathlessly, his arousal evident in his voice, matching the urgency in yours.
Moments later, Arthur reaches his peak, his release triggering your own. You cry out into the crook of his neck as waves of ecstasy wash over you, your bodies trembling in the aftermath of shared pleasure.
Both of you are left as absolute panting messes, your bodies still intertwined. His lips move across your face, peppering tender kisses everywhere, trailing down to your neck where he places a kiss at the mark he had previously left.
Gently, he pulls out of you and excuses himself momentarily. He returns with a wet towel from the bathroom, carefully cleaning you up before tossing the towel aside. A gentle peck on your lips follows, his affectionate gesture speaking volumes.
Settling into the spot next to you, he pulls you onto his chest, his arms wrapped protectively around you. "I'm so lucky to have met you," he murmurs softly, his words laced with sincerity. He places a sweet peck on your forehead, feeling the weight of the day finally catch up with you as sleep begins to overtake you.
You snuggle closer, a contented smile gracing your lips. "No you have no idea how lucky I am," you whisper, your voice barely above a breath. With a final sigh of contentment, you drift off into a peaceful slumber in his embrace, the gentle rhythm of his heartbeat lulling you into a deep sleep.
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
A/N: Thanks again to everyone who sends in requests. I appreciate all of you so much. I have about 6 works in my drafts right now that I am working on getting out as quickly as possible.
Check out my other fics and oneshots here. Not working on any new requests currently but feel free to drop into my asks for a chat! 😊
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imonanotherlebel · 3 months ago
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Featherlight touches
Choi Seungcheol x GN Reader
Comments and reblogs are much appreciated, dear readers. It helps the blog so much. If you enjoy reading my works, please do support.
I've been feeling a lot of comfort in writing domestic fluffy romantic drabbles these days...
Hope you enjoy.....
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Genre : Slight Smut, Fluff, Suggestive, Romance, Established relationship
Warnings: Minors DNI, highly suggestive, initiation of sex, kissing
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The apartment was quiet, save for the soft hum of the city outside and the distant ticking of the clock. You sat cross-legged on the bed, flipping through a book, but your thoughts kept wandering back to the man who had disappeared into the bathroom nearly an hour ago.
You heard the door click open, and your eyes instinctively lifted, catching sight of Seungcheol in the doorway, his hair still damp and slightly tousled from his shower. He was dressed casually, a loose t-shirt clinging to his broad shoulders and grey sweatpants hanging low on his hips. The sight of him, so effortlessly handsome, made your heart race just a little faster.
He caught your gaze and a small, knowing smile tugged at his lips. "What're you staring at?" he teased, his voice deep and just a touch playful as he walked over to the bed.
"Just... admiring the view," you quipped back, setting your book aside and stretching out on the bed, propping yourself up on one elbow.
Seungcheol chuckled, the sound low and rich, as he climbed onto the bed next to you. He leaned in close, the scent of his aftershave and fresh soap enveloping you, making your head spin just a little. "Is that so?" he murmured, his voice dropping an octave as his fingers trailed lightly down your arm.
You bit your lip, feeling the tension between you both start to simmer, a familiar warmth spreading through your body. "You know what you're doing, don't you?"
He grinned, a mischievous glint in his eyes as he moved even closer, his breath hot against your skin. "I might have an idea," he whispered, his hand slipping beneath the hem of your shirt, his fingers warm against your bare skin.
Your breath hitched as his touch sent a shiver down your spine. He always knew exactly how to push your buttons, how to make your heart race, and your thoughts scatter like leaves in the wind. You felt the heat rising between you, the unspoken tension that had been building all evening now crackling like electricity in the air.
Seungcheol's lips brushed against your ear, his voice a low murmur that sent a thrill through your entire body. "You know, I've been thinking about you all day," he confessed, his hand slowly trailing up your side, leaving a trail of fire in its wake. "About this..."
He pulled back just enough to look into your eyes, his gaze dark and intense. You could see the desire there, mirrored in your own eyes, and it made your heart skip a beat. "So tell me," he whispered, his lips brushing yours in a teasing, barely-there kiss. "What have you been thinking about?"
You swallowed hard, your hands finding their way to his chest, feeling the steady beat of his heart beneath your fingertips. "I've been thinking about you, too," you admitted, your voice barely more than a breath. "About how much I've missed this... missed you."
His eyes softened at your words, a small, almost tender smile playing on his lips before he closed the distance between you, capturing your lips in a kiss that was both gentle and demanding. His lips moved slowly at first, savouring the feel of you before growing more insistent, more urgent. His hand slipped down to your waist, fingers gripping you with a possessiveness that made your breath hitch.
He deepened the kiss, his tongue sliding against yours, drawing a soft moan from you that he swallowed eagerly. The taste of him was intoxicating, a mix of mint and something uniquely Seungcheol that made your head spin. He pulled you closer, your bodies pressing together, the heat between you igniting like a spark to kindling.
Seungcheol's hands moved with a practised ease, exploring your body with a familiarity that made your heart swell. His fingers trailed down your back, slipping under the hem of your shirt to caress the bare skin beneath, each touch sending a shiver through you. He pulled back from the kiss, his lips trailing down your jaw, leaving a burning trail as he moved lower, pressing open-mouthed kisses to your neck, your collarbone, nipping at your skin just hard enough to make you gasp.
You arched into him, your hands tangling in his hair, pulling him closer as he continued his descent. He pushed your shirt up, his mouth finding the sensitive skin of your stomach, kissing and biting, his hands sliding up your sides, brushing the curve of your breasts, teasing you with the promise of more. His breath was hot against your skin, his lips leaving a trail of fire in their wake, and you felt yourself melting into him, into the warmth and comfort of his touch.
He pulled back just enough to look up at you, his eyes dark with desire, his breath coming in shallow pants. "I want to take my time with you," he murmured, his voice thick with emotion, his hands never ceasing their slow, deliberate exploration of your body. "I want to make you feel everything."
You nodded, your heart pounding in your chest, the anticipation nearly overwhelming. He kissed you again, softer this time, but no less passionate, his lips moving against yours with a reverence that made your chest ache. His hands slipped lower, fingers brushing against the waistband of your pants, teasing, testing, until you were practically begging him with your eyes, your body arching into his touch.
Seungcheol didn't make you wait long. He tugged your pants down, his hands hot against your skin, his touch electrifying. He kissed you again, deeper this time, his hands sliding back up your body, pulling you close, pressing you against him as he whispered your name against your lips, his voice filled with a promise of all the nights still to come.
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twilightnesss · 3 months ago
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・.・✫・゜secret gardens in my mind
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pairing: kate martin x gf!reader
summary: after long and stressful days for kate while also being captured in the public eye, kate always turns to the one private thing in her life. her girlfriend, kristal.
warnings: smut; fingering!kate receiving. bottom kate (i hate it but it felt right)
divider from @animatedglittergraphics-n-more
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kate stood at the window of her las vegas apartment, gazing out at the bustling city below. the sun had set, casting a golden hue over the skyscrapers, their outlines stretching into the pink and orange sky. the view was breathtaking, yet it did little to soothe her hiked nerves. another hectic day in the life of a star basketball player had taken its toll.
as if on cue, her phone buzzed with a text, and a small smile played on her lips. it was from kristal, her girlfriend—a soothing balm to her soul. come over soon, the message read. i'll help you relax.
turning away from the window, kate quickly changed into something more comfortable, her movements filled with anticipation. she slipped on a soft pair of sweatpants and a loose-fitting zip up. this was her evening routine, a sacred ritual that helped her unwind from the chaos of her public life.
stepping out of her apartment, she made her way downstairs, her footsteps echoing through the quiet lobby. as she stepped outside, the cool evening air nipped at her nose, and she breathed it in deeply, savoring the freshness.
kate's strides were purposeful as she walked the familiar route to kristal's apartment, her mind beginning to unravel and her shoulders relaxing with each step. the bustling city streets, usually a source of anxiety due to the constant attention, now felt like a welcoming backdrop to her private escape.
as she approached her destination, her heart rate quickened in anticipation. she climbed the stairs to kristal's floor and knocked softly on the familiar door.
the door opened, and there stood kristal, her haven in this chaotic world. kristal's eyes glistened with a welcoming warmth, her dark hair falling softly around her shoulders. she stepped aside, inviting kate inside with a gentle gesture.
the apartment was filled with the soothing aroma of incense, and soft jazz music played in the background, creating an ambiance that immediately slowed kate's racing thoughts.
"i've been thinking about you all day," kristal whispered, leaning in for a tender kiss.
kate melted into the embrace, the stress of the outside world momentarily forgotten. kristal's full lips and the subtle hint of mint in her mouth ignited a fire within her. breaking the kiss, kristal led kate further into the apartment, their hands intertwined.
seated on the plush couch, kate allowed herself to be drawn into an intimate embrace, kristal's slender fingers caressing her hair and neck. the tension that had been building up within her began to unwind. kristal's expert hands massaged her shoulders and back, working out the knots with practiced ease.
"you always look so stressed when you come over," kristal murmured, her breath warm against Kate's ear. "let me help you let go of all that."
with that, kristal stood up and began unzipping kate’s hoodie, her eyes never leaving kate's as she slowly revealed the soft skin beneath. once the hoodie was removed, kristal's hands returned to massage kate's bare shoulders, her touch even more exhilarating without the barrier of fabric.
kate's breath quickened as she felt kristal's fingers trail down her spine, and a shiver ran through her body. kristal's lips found their way to the nape of her neck, planting soft kisses that sent shudders down her spine.
"i want you to relax completely," kristal whispered, her voice like velvet against kate's sensitized skin. "let me take care of you."
kate felt herself being guided to the center of the room, where a large bean bag chair awaited. kristal helped her settle onto it, and kate reclined, closing her eyes as Kristal's skilled hands continued their magical touch. the world around her faded away, and she surrendered to the soothing atmosphere, her mind drifting into a peaceful haze.
kristal's massages had a hypnotic effect, and kate lost track of time, her body becoming heavier with each passing moment. the tension melted away, leaving her feeling weightless and serene. and then, kristal's hands stopped, and a momentary silence enveloped them.
kate opened her eyes to find kristal kneeling before her, a mischievous smile playing on her lips. without a word, kristal reached for the hem of kate's leggings, slowly slipping them off her muscular legs, revealing the smooth skin beneath.
kate's heart raced as she understood kristal's silent invitation. she sat up slightly, eager to reciprocate the favor, and began untying the loose knot of kristal's robe, revealing the curvaceous body beneath.
with gentle hands, they explored each other's bodies, touching, caressing, and kissing with utmost devotion. their breaths synchronized in the quiet room, the soft music providing the perfect backdrop to their intimate dance.
kate took her time, savoring the taste of kristal's skin, the scent of her perfume, and the feel of her supple curves. every touch was intentional, every kiss filled with longing. she explored every inch of kristal's body, relishing the soft moans and shivers that her touches evoked.
similarly, kristal's expertise in arousing kate was evident. her hands seemed to know exactly where to wander, and her lips devoured kate's with a hungry passion that matched her own. the bean bag chair became their sanctuary, a soft nest for their built up desires.
their kisses intensified, and kate felt the heat of desire build within her. she craved more, needing to feel kristal deeper inside her.
with gentle urgency, they guided each other to lie down on the large bed nearby. the soft sheets dipped beneath them, and they nestled together, their bodies now aligned.
kate felt kristal's hot breath against her collarbone as her strong thighs bracketed her hips. a low moan escaped kate's lips as kristal's fingers found their way to the most intimate parts of her body, skillfully teasing and pleasing her.
the pleasure built in waves, and kate surrendered to the sensation, her hips rising to meet kristal's expert touches. the room became a blur, the outside world non-existent, as she was lost in a maelstrom of pleasure.
kristal's name escaped her lips in passionate sighs, her fingers entwined with kristal's as they both rode the high of an intense orgasm. the aftermath left them content and breathless, their bodies glistening with a fine layer of sweat.
lying in each other's arms, kate felt the weight of the day lift from her shoulders. kristal's steady heartbeat against her ear soothed her soul, and she knew that this was her sanctuary, a place where she could truly be herself and find peace.
as the night deepened, they shared whispers of their day, their voices soft and intimate in the dark room. the scent of sex and the soothing jazz created an atmosphere that was both exhilarating and calming.
eventually, reality hit, and they reluctantly parted ways, dressing in silence as the moon cast a silvery glow over their intimate space.
kate exited the apartment, a sense of calm and contentment washing over her. the city streets seemed quieter now, and the paparazzi nonexistant. she breathed in the night air, feeling rejuvenated and grateful for the sanctuary that kristal provided.
returning to her own apartment, kate felt a sense of balance restored. she knew that no matter the chaos that awaited her tomorrow, she had a secret weapon—a loving embrace that could melt away any stress.
as she drifted off to sleep, kate smiled, knowing that while the public eye may capture her image, her true self belonged to another—a captivating woman who provided her with a sanctuary of sensual bliss.
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a/n: hehe.. love , lana
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wayfayrr · 1 year ago
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Surprise!!
I'm back from my break, taking some time just to clear my thought's feels like it's worked wonders <33
To set things back off with a bang I've got the grand prize winner for @glowyskull in my 200 followers raffle!! It's self aware twi deciding to take certain matters into his own hands after his darling reader was gone for so long - since he's fresh out of twilight princess in this one he's going as link rather than twilight as well I hope you enjoy!! <3
[masterlist]
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Of all the days to get sick it had to be today, of course it is. I’m somewhat grateful for the extra day off though even if I would’ve preferred not being sent home early, it’ll give me some time to sort out some things I’ve been pushing aside for a while. Maybe I could start by finally sorting out some boxes of old things I’ve been putting off for ages. Well, now that box is a lot emptier than it was when I started and I’ve finally found my old Wii - I wonder does it still have my old Twilight Princess save? Maybe I could see, there’s not much else to do now I’ve finished sorting everything out. Just gotta get all the wires plugged in correctly and then … There! It’s certainly working which is a good sign, now all there is to do is to open it up and check up on something I thought I had lost long ago. 
This isn’t how it should open - I know what the opening is supposed to be.
There should be something here, not just this, not just this dark empty noise. Maybe the data got corrupted or something, I shouldn’t have gotten my hopes up.
“..Dar-li-in’?”
“...”
“Darlin’ is that - you - you’ve finally come back darlin’? I - I ain’t alone anymore?”
…What is that - that can’t just be file corruption, that was someone speaking to me… It wasn’t the clearest, it sounded like it had been put through rounds of compression but that was definitely a voice… 
“You are there aren’t you darlin’? Please - I don’t- I can’t go - I can’t”
“I can’t go back to how I’ve been stuck I can’t - I can’t do it anymore… I know I’m supposed to be the courageous hero but I -”
“- I can’t do this anymore… I ca-n’t do - this… not - no-t any-m…”
He cut himself off with his own sobbing… I’ve never heard anyone sound half as broken as this, it’d be the rawest I’ve ever heard anyone cry if it wasn’t for all of the distortion… What has he been through? Now that the static has lessened - It’s links model, but more humanlike? It’s like there’s a person on the other side of the screen and not just a character.
But that means He’s the one crying…The way he’s standing is just as heartbreaking as his sobs are, his hands pressed up against the glass, his head hanging low and endless tears falling down his face. How do I go about - I know where I can start… 
“...Link? Can you hear me - I - I’m not sure if I’m the darlin’ you’re talking about, but right now, You aren’t alone link.”
“[Name] - you ? Oh darlin’ you - You’re really here - ‘m not imagining this? You - you’re finally back?”
“Yeah, I’m here link.”
His crying sounds happier now, but it still doesn’t sound anywhere close to stopping - I don’t expect him to stop crying for a long while though. It has to have been what - at least a decade since I last played? - has he been trapped in there aware the whole time? 
“You aren’t - you aren’t going to leave me again, are you? Please darlin’ - I can’t go back - it’s so - I can’t. Please. Darlin’ you can’t leave me again - I can’t do this anymore.”
His voice sounds even worse now, it’s heartbreaking and I think he knows how inhuman he sounds if his wince is anything to go off of, how he sounds is hurting him too.
“I thought I’d tried every way to get out… but I - I never got the chance to do it when the game was on… You won’t be able to leave me if this works… will you darlin'?”
Here I thought his crying sounded scary, the way it’s fading into laughter is downright haunting. It sounds so wet as if he’s choking on his tears as he laughs. 
“I’m finally going to get out- I’m not - I’m not going to be stuck anymore.  Darlin’ I”
For the first time since this all started he’s looking up at me, lifting his head like it’s one of the heaviest things to exist just to make eye contact with me. He looks… he looks like he’s ready to kill someone.
“W-what are you - what are you planning to do link?”
“... I don’t know… All I do know is that this glass keeping us apart? It’s so thin… I think tha-”
The way he silenced himself suddenly isn’t so shocking, not when a smile is cracking its way across his face mirroring the glass underneath his fingers. His breath and mine hitched before his laughing picked back up with even more distortion. 
“To - to think darlin’ - all I  - it just - it just needed to be on - I… I…”
Blood coated my shelf now due to how desperately his hand is reaching for something to hold onto after the glass tore into his skin. This is all just a fever dream though so…
Without much more thinking I reached out to take his hand, wincing slightly as the glass caught in his skin dug into mine. Immediately his grip tightened with a choked sob coming from him, like he didn’t expect me to help him. It doesn’t take long after that for him to shatter the screen in his desperation, falling out onto me knocking us both to the floor. Shards of my tv embedding themselves into any bare skin of his, blood - his blood - streaking out from each and every wound now marring his face as proof that this is real.
The same blood that’s starting to stain my shirt.
“I’m here darlin’ - ‘m finally out.”
“Yeah, you are Link, you’re out of there now.”
Everything feels so fuzzy, maybe my fever really is messing with me more than I thought. Real or not though, I should deal with the cuts on his face, he isn’t from here… Who knows how deadly even the most basic infection could be to him?
“...Link, if I may you’ve um… you’ve gotten a lot of cuts from …that and I don’t think it’s a good idea to leave them as they are. Would you mind if I...?”
“You would - darlin’ you’d do that just for me?”
“I’d do it for anyone who needed it… and you really need it. I don’t want to think what could happen if I don’t. I’ll just need to get up to grab some supplies okay?”
As I shifted to get up he let out a low groan and buried his head more into my torso, clearly very against the idea of me moving in any way. Even trying to gently pry him off of me isn’t helping at all, he’s not letting go anytime soon; his grip only seems to be getting tighter with every movement I make. 
“Link, please… I don’t know how your body could react to an infection and we don’t have healing potions or fairies here. I’ll be back in just a second I swear.”
“Darlin’. You aren’t leavin' me again, I’ve already spent far too long without you when you abandoned me for so, so long.”
Why does he sound and feel so real this can’t be… this has to be a hallucination. Come on [name], just deal with this as it comes. 
“I don’t need to leave you then, you can stay with me while I get what I need. Does that work for you?”
A gentle nod followed by loosening his hold on me was a good sign that he is okay with this, despite how frail and overwhelmed his face makes him out to be. Getting up still isn’t the easiest thing to do with how he refuses to let go of me despite if he did then it would far easier for the both of us to get up. Then the moment I do finally get up immediately his arms are wrapped around my waist as he pulls himself up with me, almost as if he’s struggling to stand on his own; not that I’ll question that now, there are other issues to be dealing with.
Shuffling over to where I keep my first aid kit, link could clearly tell it wasn’t the best idea to keep ahold of me while I get it, instead leaning on the wall keeping himself upright as his eyes never left me the entire time his hands weren't on me. Like he’s scared I’m going to up and vanish or something. Because I did. I did and I left him in that place. I left him to rot.
“Okay I’ve got it link, let’s go sit down and I can treat your wounds.”
“M’kay darlin’.”
Leading him back to the couch with his arms securely around my waist again was faster than before, letting me move him into the position that would be more comfortable for him while I do this. 
“Okay wolf boy, this isn’t going to be the best. After I’ve taken the shards out, I’ll have to disinfect the cuts. So this is gonna sting a little alright? Just try to keep still and it’ll be over faster.”
The silence was tattered with the occasional whine and whimper as I pull each and every shard littering his otherwise perfect face. It wasn’t long till I was preparing some rubbing alcohol on a cloth just to be certain there won’t be any more risks. Just got to do it before I start getting too drowsy from this fever. 
“There you go Link, not much longer now, you’re doing amazingly. I’ll warn you again though this is really going to sting.”
“Darlin’ nothing could sting worse than the feeling of you abandoning me all that time.”
Hissing and pulling away when the cloth came close to touching him seemed to disprove that faster than he meant for it too. Not that I didn’t expect him to try pulling away from it, just not pushing my hand away while pressing himself into my other side. With a soft sigh, I let him grab onto my free hand with both of his, the image of him clinging to my sleeve like a plush toy being one of the cutest things I would have ever seen if not for the blood streaming down his face. 
“Come on, you were doing so well. I promise it’ll only take a moment more then it’ll be done with…”
That seemed to do the trick, despite the clear pout and his tightening grip whenever it seemed to hurt a little too much, he’s let me clean the blood off of his face and clean the wounds. Now just to bandage him up and -
“All done link, see it was worth it right? Now you don’t have to worry about all those cuts; I can go and lie down for a bit now too.”
“Lie down but - but I just got here… can’t we spend more time together?”
“I do want to link, I can promise you that. I’m just not feeling well, I haven’t been well for this whole time really; this fever is taking more of a toll on me than I thought it would.”
“Fever? Oh, darlin’ you, you should be resting not dealin' with me [name]. I - I didn’t even realise, I just. I was so excited to be here with you that I didn’t even notice you were in pain. How could I even call myself your lover?”
What did he just-?
No don't worry about that at the moment [name].
Laying my head on his chest after gently shoving him onto the couch is such a comforting feeling; if he’s just my fever trying to convince me to rest, well I wouldn’t mind getting sick more often. 
“‘s alright link, don’t worry about ‘t. I’m just, gonna sleep for a little bit. Then if you aren't just a hallucination we can spend more time together later.”
Hands carded through my hair only seem to push me further into sleep now, there’s no point resisting and forcing myself to stay awake now anyway.
“I know we will darlin’, ‘cause I ain’t ever letting you leave me ever again.”
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being-addie · 2 years ago
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Morning Routines
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We're all looking at those Instagram influencers who somehow manage to wake up at 5 am, do meditation, journal, do a 15-step Korean skincare routine, and go to the gym. And then they make a green smoothie and avocado toast, get dressed in a Chanel outfit and then sit at their fancy desk with a vanilla latte and a croissant.
This is not realistic. You probably already know that, but it likely won't stop you from trying to change your routine bit by bit to look a little like theirs. That didn't stop me, at least.
But now I've come to realise that no matter how much I try, I'll never be able to have a routine like the ones I see online. Because it doesn't exist. It's all curated for aesthetic appeal and generates a sense of false productivity in the watcher's brain. We feel motivated looking at those videos and never get around to changing our own life because we're too busy living vicariously through our phones.
Here's some things you should add to your morning routine, not to be fancy, but to feel better. This is coming from someone who's tried the unrealistic routines, and I now incorporate all of these into my routine. You can skip or add things according to your schedule.
S-T-R-E-T-C-H: Do your body a favour and loosen up your muscles. Nothing better than having a good stretch that wakes your body up.
Drink water: Before you put anything in your system, drink water. Not coffee, not tea. Plain warm water. And I don't mean lemon water. Some people might not agree, but lemon water strips your teeth of the enamel. It also is acidic, so all that bullshit they talk about it being "alkaline and pH balancing" is nonsense. Warm water is the way to go.
Make your bed: A clean bed should be the first thing you do after you wake up. At the end of the day, you'll thank yourself because it will be clean, and fresh and you can fall into bed immediately.
Hygiene: Wash your face to get rid of crusty eyes and sleep. Do a basic skincare routine (cleanser, moisturizer) so you'll feel fresher. Brush your teeth and hair.
Move your body: It doesn't matter what you do, even if it's for 15 minutes. Go for a walk, do a Zumba workout, or squeeze in a HIIT session. You can find lots of tutorials on YouTube (Caroline Girvan, growingannanas, Chloe Ting). Either way, working out will help you feel more motivated and happier. It's the endorphins.
Clean yourself: Set aside some time for showering, slathering on lotion, and doing your (real) skincare and makeup routine. Pick an outfit that makes you feel good about yourself.
Eat something: ALWAYS make some food. Your body has been famished for hours on end, give it some fuel. Make a healthy breakfast, or prep one the night before. If you don't get very hungry in the mornings, have a banana, and pack a mid-morning snack beforehand so you don't reach for chips.
Do 3 things: Make a to-do list of everything you need to do today. Don't overwhelm yourself. Then, knock off 3 easy tasks from the list that you can do quickly. You'll be filled with a sense of motivation, and it'll be easier for you to complete your list. It can be chores, it could be some assigned reading. Just get it done.
Gratitude or prayer: You don't need to sit for 15 minutes to practice gratitude. You can think of things your thankful for on the way to school or work or practice deep breathing/say a small prayer on the subway or bus. You don't HAVE to do it, but it definitely makes you realise how much you have in life and appreciate it more.
Kindness: Start your day with kindness. Compliment your barista, smile at the old lady on the street, pet the stray cat. There's so much love in the world, and you have so much love inside you, and it's beautiful to be a part of it.
No longer will I be stuck in a rut. I cannot be confined to being a bitter, unhealthy person when I know there's a smiling, healthy, happy version of me in the future. Deep breaths. You'll get there babe.
<3
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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 6 months ago
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you know i've been thinking about the consequences of malleus's actions in book 7 and i realized how much he's fucked everyone over including his grandma. bc like other than the fact that he ob'd (which literally has NEGATIVE connotations one of which being is idk ""UNSTABLE"" which isnt necessarily a good look for a crown prince is all im saying) he's literally causing terrorism (??? can you call it that idk how else to call it) which is going to setback his grandma's efforts (and lilia's and baul's, and every supporter of his and his family) in keeping peace in their kingdom and the favor of the humans towards the fae. Like. i feel so bad for grandmother draconia rn i can only imagine the stress and pressure she's under.
Then theres also aside from PHYSCIALLY compromising everyone's healths in sage island (BECAUSE THE MAJORITY ARE HUMANS OR AT LEAST THEY DONT LIVE AS LONG AS THE FAE). He's also fucked everyone mentally twice over!!!! By booting them straight into a world where none of their problems exist. Now that wouldnt sound bad if it weren't for the fact that dreams have to end, and life isnt kind. It rarely ever is, and i can only imagine how distraught i would be if i were to say, hypothetically lost someone a year before and the wound is so fresh and raw and, in my dreams, they never died and everything is okay, then i wake up and realize that it was just that. A dream, they are still gone and i wish i never woke up which would be a LITERAL DEATH SENTENCE. This isnt just an event that takes place in NRC either BUT THE WHOLE ISLAND and that domain is GROWING, GROWING. I can't imagine just how many would be so emotionally ruined after this. Like.....
If Malleus does not suffer the consequences of his actions istg i will be so pissed, at least REMOVE HIM FROM THE PREMISE OR SOMETHING GODDDDDDD this cannot be remedied with a slap on the hand!!!!!
(Note: Sorry for the long rant. I felt the need to get this out of my chest bc i dont mind malleus's archetype actually nor do i actually hate him, bc i enjoy him interacting w other characters a lot (my fave ever vigenette is him giving deuce the equivalent of minecraft diamon for fixing a retrobit gaming toy) BUT GOD DOES HE MAKE MY BLOOD BOIL)
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Yeah, I do feel like the scale of Malleus's actions cannot be understated. I know it's kind of a fandom joke that the OB boys are left off with a slap on the wrist + maybe some social ramifications at school, but this is the ONE time in the main story where things are getting super big and the effects could be cripplingly long-lasting.
I don't know if TWST will seriously address the consequences after book 7, but I sure hope they do!! There is a lot of interesting ground to cover (many points which this anon has already brought up) in a follow-up main story arc or the next book.
For example:
Malleus obviously has to regain the trust of his peers and staff. He didn’t really have it before but now has to work twice as hard to make connections since he just took a drastic action that confirmed the rumors some were already spreading about how he’s a monster.
He’s the sole heir to the throne and has just betrayed the trust of the people of Briar Valley. How are they feeling about him now? Do they still trust him to lead them?
How does this impact their relations with other countries (since Malleus himself stresses how he represents Briar Valley)? This is a problem visible on a global scale, and surely this would damage their rep with other nations, particularly the predominantly human ones. It’s setting back what is hundreds of years of trying to fix the broken trust between their races.
Malleus’s UM potentially puts his victims in physical harm; in book 7, Ortho suggests that since everyone is sleeping, their bodies are not getting the food or water they need. As a result, they may physically waste away and then perish. (We have seen that there are sleep blessings that keep people sleeping for hundreds of years without detriment to the blessed though, such as the one cast on Silver—so we cannot be entirely sure if Ortho’s theory is correct or not.)
There is the possibility that Malleus’s dreams may traumatize or retraumatize his victims, particularly those with deep rooted troubles. An example of this is Idia, who had suffered the loss of his brother when he was like… 8 years old??? But then in his dream, Idia is living a happy false reality that Ortho never died. When he finally comes to this realization, he has to relive the trauma of the discovery all over again and breaks down sobbing. We also see in the most recent book 7 update that Vil had to face the evilest aspects of himself and a dark reality; Rook became very emotional upon waking himself. Admittedly, Idia and co. coped with it well enough—this is proof of their character development and the strength of the new friendships they’ve formed. However, all the people on Sage’s Island/Twisted Wonderland may not react so positively or be so accepting of their cruel realities.
Again, just the overall moral dilemma of one person robbing all of Sage’s Island (and soon all of Twisted Wonderland) of their autonomy.
Potential extra work for STYX and whichever countries Malleus’s magic manages to spread to (repairing any physical damage caused by the thorns + mental damage done to those that fell asleep). That’s money, time, and resources that aren’t going toward other everyday endeavors.
How will Malleus himself mentally and emotionally cope with what he has done? Is he going to show remorse and shame? How does he plan on rectifying his actions, if at all?
Will this change how his dorm members + family view him? For example, will Sebek become disillusioned with his liege/realize Malleus is not as perfect as he seems? Will Maleficia blame herself for not being there for Malleus? Will Lilia feel guilty for not teaching Malleus right from wrong? Etc, etc, etc.
I’d honestly love to read all of these! 🤔 It would add a lot to the lore and history of Twisted Wonderland, as well as serve as motivators for Malleus to change, “be better”, and actually earn the respect he’s so used to being handed by default. This would be huge for him, especially seeing as he has not really faced significant backlash or consequences for any other missteps he was responsible for or involved in. (I know I bring this one up a lot, but Endless Halloween Night is one such major example.)
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daddysfangirls-marvel · 6 days ago
Text
Polyamorous: Inexperience pt.1
*Bonus*
Stucky x fem!reader \ Steve Roger x fem!reader x Bucky Barnes
Warning: Smut, fluff
Polyamorous Material List
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(Y/n) didn't bother knocking on the door, going straight for the hidden key and unlocking it. Already familiar with the apartment, she tosses her jacket on the back of the armchair and going into the kitchen. " I'm so sorry I'm-oh" (Y/n) quickly turned around and covered her eyes. " I'm sorry, so sorry".
"Okay," Bucky said as he helped Steve off the kitchen counter and they adjusted themselves, fix themselves. But still with flush faces, swollen lips, and ruffled clothes it was very clear what was happening. That and Steve didn't adjust himself as well as Bucky.
"I'm sorry I'm late my father kept me at the store."
" It's alright, dinner is still warm." Bucky said as he pulled out a chair for her. Steve took his seat quickly trying his best to hide his 'situation'. " Beef Stew and biscuits."
"Bread is fresh I got it from the bakery this morning." Steve said doing his best not to make eye contact. Bucky went to dish out the bowls.
(Y/n) reached across the small table taking his hand in hers. He looked up at her. "Thank you, it smells wonderful. Thank you for all of this." Steve flushed not knowing how to take the praise.
"How you're mom doing?"
"She's well, doing much better . They've recently assigned her to the tuberculosis ward. The pay is higher but the hours are longer too." The new risk was unsaid.
Steve's mother, Ms. Sarah, was a nurse and had been jumping between wards for as long as one could remember. She always went where help was most needed. While everyone thought her very admirable it was also very scary. They feard that one day she'd pick something up from one of her patients and not be able to shake it or worse give it to Steve who had a very weak health.
"She'll be working late tonight. I've already set aside some dinner for her," Bucky said as he placed the bowls on the table and returned to the kitchen.
" My father thinks I'm having a sleep over with Rebecca. Hope your sister doesn't mind being my excuse, Bucky."
"She loves you and will tell any lie you need." he said as he placed three wine glasses on the table. The two looked at him confused as he produced a bottle of wine "Pinot Noir, franch "
"where did you get that? you can't afford that."
"Well forunately for us darling this fell off the back of a truck"
"You stole" Steve moved to scold him.
"No, it literally fell off the back of a truck. I wasn't going to waste it." Bucky defened himself as he popped the cork" Don't we deserve some luxury. Something fancy for once." he pours a glass " Plus, when will any of us ever be able to afford a bottle of wine like this. We can barely afford the cheap stuff. Please, enjoy it now."
He passed the glass to Steve. He sighed and took it while glaring he brings the glass to his lips and has a sip. " Taste expensive."
(Y/n) giggled, Bucky fills her glass. He finally sits and all three of them raise their glasses. " A toast?"
"yes, A toast to us and to now. To always being together." Steve said
"We three may never part" (Y/n) said
" Damn right" Bucky cheered.
-
After dinner, the three moved themselves to the front room. Bucky and (Y/n) found themselves lost in their book, him on the floor and she on the couch, with Steve sketching them while a radio played softly in the background. He is on the couch with (Y/n).
(Y/n) was so engrossed in her book that she fell to notice when Steve abandoned his sketch and moved to read over her shoulder. Bucky watched in amusement for a few minutes as the two cuddled up to each other without even realizing it.
They curled up to each other, becoming closer and closer with each turn of a page. He also noticed how flushed each of them were becoming. Interesting.
"Whatcha reading?" She snapped the book shut, and Bucky couldn't help but laugh at how stunned they both looked. They looked like a pair of kids who got caught doing something they definitely shouldn't have been doing. "Okay, now you have to show me." He stood up and approached them, holding his hand out for the book. (Y/n) held the book close to her chest.
"It's just a book."
"An interesting book."
"What makes you think that?"
"How you cling to the cover, your flushed face, Steve's bulge." Steve quickly moves to cover his 'situation.'Bucky grinned as (Y/n) sighed and passed him the book. She moved to hide her face in a pillow as Bucky flipped through the book. " Let's see what's got you two so red."
"Bucky," Steve pleaded
" 'I should …really...get back to work.' Levi said in between her kisses but made no attempt to stop her or move her off of his lap. OH . Untying his tie she tosses it on the other end of the couch and began to unbutton his shirt as her lips moved to his neck hoping to mark her territory."
"Okay, that's enough." (Y/n) stood up and tried to take the book from him, but he held it above her head.
" he groaned as she choked on his - " the book was ripped from his hand and tossed across the room before he could even read ahead. He was shocked as he looked at her "What the fuck?"
"Sorry, I just -sorry."
"It's okay, I was just teasing. I'm sorry."
"I overreacted."
"You think." That earned Steve a pillow to the face. Bucky sat on the couch beside her. "where did you get that book anyway?" He asked
"Discount basket."
It took a moment, but the three of them began to laugh. They laugh hysterically for several minutes. Only stopping when they were finally out of breath.
"Getting dirty at a discount"
"Shush, Buck"
"Why'd you throw it?" he asked
"Wasn't a good read," she said, shrugging.
"Really, you seemed quite interested in it. Both of you."
" Mom won't be back until tomorrow morning," Steve suddenly said, gaining the attention of the two—one in confusion, the other in shock and joy. " we have the place to ourselves."
He took note of her confusion, and he began to stutter, " We-we could do it. Since we're al-lone."
Still confused.
"Sex. Steve is saying he's ready for sex."
"Oh," her voice reached a new pitch.
"We don't have to. Not really we-"
"Okay, I think I'm ready too."
They both turned to Bucky.
-
After talking some more in the front room, the three moved into the bedroom. Bucky took Steve into the bathroom to help him get ready, leaving (y/n) alone. (Y/n) had removed her dress and stockings and was now having an internal debate about whether she should take off her slip as well leaving her in her underwear.
She quickly lost her decision as the door opened, and the two stepped in, Bucky in his pants and tank top and Steve with a towel around his waist.
"Hi," she said
"hi," Steve returned.
Bucky sat at the desk, and Steve and (y/n) stood in front of him, waiting for instructions. Inexperienced students waiting for their experienced teacher.
" I want you two to be comfortable and enjoy this. You should experience each other first."
"You just want to watch us," Steve scoffed, crossing his arms
"Yeah, you're a perv." (Y/n) agreed.
"Sure am. Now put on a show for this perv."
And confidence is gone. The two just stood there for a moment, fidgeting. It was Steve who got the courage to make the first move, asking to kiss. Bucky watched as the two kissed, starting off as gentle and sweet before progressing into a more heated kiss. He took note of their hands (Y/n)'s hands, pulled at her slip, and hovered over Steve's chest. His hand gripped his towel. Both seemed eager yet afraid to touch.
"You can use your hands." He encouraged. (Y/n) was the first one to move, putting her hands on his shoulders. She pulled him closer before suddenly pushing him away. Steve had quickly thought he had did something wrong and stepped back further ready to apologize before he realized she was just removing her slip.
Quickly stepping out of it, she reaches Steve again and-
"What is that?" Bucky asked, interrupting and reminding them they weren't alone. They stepped back from each other. " What are you wearing? What is that?"
"My girdle?"
"When did you start wearing a girdle? I've never noticed."
" I've... I gained some weight in the back, and I've been having trouble...This slims me out." she kind of wished she kept her slip on now not liking where the attention was going.
"You don't need to slim out," Steve said. "You're beautiful."
"Thank you." She decided to keep the comments about how this beauty fit her clothes a bit too tight to herself. Now was not the time for that. Plus they couldn't help anyways.
" How about we take it off," Bucky said, motioning her over. As she stepped forward, he tugged on her girdle and was surprised to find how tight it was. Giving it a few more big tugs it finally came off. " Much better".
She gasped as he kissed her stomach, fueling the heat that was growing in her stomach.
"you should move to the bed."
"Okay." She moved to the bed, pulling Steve with her. She connected their lips again with far more eagerness than before, her hands feeling aimlessly against his flushed skin, gripping and pulling at anything she could get her hands on. Steve left himself to her mercy, letting her take whatever she wanted, simply breathing her in, accepting everything she gave, feeling the heat between their bodies.
"Take off the rest," Bucky called attention to himself. " If you want to actually do it, you need to take off the rest."
No longer shy, the two eagerly shed the last of their clothes.
In the year since their physical relationship began, the throuple had had several intimate moments that involved heavy petting, hands, and fingers and clothes. They had never removed each other's clothes. Some form of fabric was always between them.
Until now.
(y/n) stood shyly, chest red, nipples hard, and a wetness between her thighs that would have had her embarrassed in any other situation. But right now, she was busy eyeing Steve.
Steve stood more like a soldier, chin up, chest out, and head forward. Standing at attention, much like his cock. Which stood tall and wrapped. His stance was more so helpful with his heart rate and breathing. The moment (Y/n) removed her clothes, he lost his breath and feared he'd have an asthma attack before they could even start and ruin everything.
Bucky saw this, the way Steve was breathing through his nose and clenching his hands at his side, clear signs of fighting an oncome asthma attack. He decided to step in a bit more.
"Alright, Stevie, lay down." He was quick to follow instructions. Laying across the bed. Bucky took (Y/n)'s hand and led her to the bed. Helping her up and to straddle Steve sitting on his thighs. He sits next to them.
"Now listen, doll, I'm about to teach you something very important," he said to (y/n) as he kissed her nose. He then pulls a square package out of his pocket. She reaches for it, but he pulls it away. " What is is?"
"A condom?"
"Yes, and I'm going to teach you how to put it on Stevie here, okay?" she nods. " Mind being our test dummy punk." He leaned down to kiss him.
Opening the package, he hands it to (Y/N), and they handle it together. Him placing his hands over hers.
Steve gasped as they touched him, slowly stroking him. " Make sure he's tall and stiff for us." He moaned as they swiped his tip, which was leaking pre-cum. Bucky watched as (Y/n) sighed slightly, licking her lips. Something to explore at another time.
"And now, we're going to pinch the tip and roll it down." Steve closed his eyes tossed his head back and held his breath. They rolled it down all the way to the base and gave it a squeeze.
"Ta-da, you do so well," Bucky said as he leaned down, kissing Steve's neck. "Almost there."
He kisses (Y/n) neck. His fingers went down, and she gasped as she felt him touching her lips. She was more than wet enough.
"Are we ready?"
(Y/n) and Steve nodded nervously. He let go and stepped back, sitting at the desk again. They looked at him, confused.
"This is for the two of you. I'm just watching." Bucky said," Or I could leave and give you some privacy if you'd like?"
"NO" they both screamed.
"Please, no," Steve said, his breath starting to pick up as he sat up
"Please don't go. What if we do something wrong?" Syn said
" I won't go," Bucky said. " And do what feels natural. Follow your instincts and ask if need be. You'll be alright."
They two looked at him nervously, and he just nodded. They both turned back toward each other.
"Hi," they whispered to each other.
(Y/n) took a deep breath before lifting her hips. Steve gasped as she took him in her hands. She held her breath as she started to slowly sink onto him. Steve gasped as the tip slipped in the warmth, wetness, and tightness. (Y/n) whimpered as he slipped further in.
"STOP" Steve shouted breathlessly as he reached up, gripping her hips. " Fuck, please stop. I need to breathe."
"oh, oh no. Are you having an asthma attack? I can get off."
"No." Steve stopped her from getting up, gripping her hips tighter." I just need a moment to breathe. To catch my breath."
"Steve," Bucky spoke up. " You can stop here."
"No, I don't want to. I just need a moment, please."
"Okay, okay," (Y/n) leaned down, kissing his cheek. "Take your time."
Fortunately, he only needed a few minutes before he thought himself read (her thighs were starting to burn). She sunk the rest of the way down, taking all of him. Steve whimpered and dug his nails into her hip.
"Can I move?" (y/n) asked
"God, yes, please, yes." closing his eyes and tossing his head back.
She did as told. Slowly, she started going up and down, bouncing on him and moaning softly. She leaned forward, placing her hands on either side of his head. She continued to bounce. The sound of moans and skin slapping filled the room.
The site, the sound, Bucky couldn't help himself as he slipped his hand into his pants, finding his already leaking cock. He bit back a moan as he began to stroke himself as he watched (Y/n) start to bounce faster.
" I -I want a kiss," (Y/n) asked, still bouncing on Steve." Please, can I have a kiss, Stevie?"
He opened his eyes and-
"NGH ahhh"
He came.
The site of her leaning over, face and chest flushed, breast so close, and then further now where they were still connected. Yeah, he came in an instant. (Y/n) stopped.
"Fuck, I'm- I'm so sorry. I don't- I didn't-"
"That was a pretty face," she suddenly said, and it was. It made that feeling in her stomach tighter and warmer. She wished it lasted longer, that she had taken a picture of it, and that he'd done it again.
"Shit" They both looked up to see Bucky slumped down in his seat with a hand down his pants and a large wet spot formed on his pants.
(Y/n) started to sit up and remove Steve.
"Doll, did you finish?" Bucky asked.
"Um, no. But that's okay. A friend told me girls can't always finish like boys." (Y/n) just shrugged it off.
"No." Bucky removed his hand from his pants and approached the bed. He pushed her back down on Steve's cock, making his whimper" Stevie, this right here" He took his hand and put it right on her clit. "Rub it in circles."
(Y/n) yelp as he touched it and moaned as he began to rub it in circles. That warm and tight feeling in her stomach started to return. Steve whimpered as he felt her tightness around his already sensitive cock. He began to rub faster as he felt the need to come again. With the tightness surrounding his cock and Bucky whispering in her ear to make her come, make her come on his cock, treat her good. Be Good.
He was coming again, and she was coming this time as well. She moaned as she collapsed on his chest, arching her back nails digging into his chest.
-
"How was it?" Bucky asked as he watched (Y/n) dap the small cuts on Steve's chest. After being spent, Steve quickly gave in to exhaustion, leaving Bucky and (Y/n) to clean him up.
"It wasn't what I expected," (Y/n) said as she helped Bucky lift Steve's hips, putting some boxers on.
"Is that good or bad?"
"Good. It was really good."
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court-jobi · 1 month ago
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AAAAH i love your bakugo x biker!reader series every time you post a new story I get so excited their relationship is so cute and your writing is so compelling I just have to read them over and over again
Awwww anon!!! Thank you so much!!! That is high praise, and I appreciate you sharing your love for them so much~ Methinks I need to start a little timeline for that sweet n' spicy reader... and perhaps give you a lil sneak peak into an idea I've had recently where biker!reader is a bit cheeky... all in good fun, right?
To catch up on this series and my other MHA fics, check it out here!
Bakugou x biker!reader WIP incoming...
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Picturing UA holding a Work Study Expo -a new initiative by Midoriya to help connect would-be heroes with Pros they may not know yet; namely for the hero courses, but also with added attention for the support students!
Enter our darling biker!reader. Reader is sandwiched by Kirishima and Bakugou to come attend-- the boys both RSVP with a unanimous 'yes' seeing a UA reunion tour in the making, with Bakugou particularly excited to take you there to see his former school since you'd received your secondary education elsewhere.
You're happy for it too; gives you just a little more insight into the place that had a large part in building him up to the hero status he is today...
...until the three of you are checking out the figures across the reception space-- and you freeze when you spot someone. Kirishima clocks it as a starstruck response and despite your harshly whispered word of denial, he makes off in golden retriever fashion to go get them.
Bakugou would be... a bit intrigued to see this reaction from you. Not that you weren't allowed your idols (even though he feels no one holds a candle to Allmight by default), but he was curious as to why you would look so... antsy. It wasn't quite a 'Deku' level of floundering - but that purposeful squaring up of your shoulders and avoidance of his eye contact altogether gave him cocky cause to tease you further.
"What, scared to meet your heroes? Figured you'd be plenty used to that by now."
"Shush,heisnotmyhero."
"Oi--" Bakugou cocks his head to the side, effectively forcing you to look at him over your predicted line of sight. "What's your issue then, angel eyes?"
With an unavoidable storytime bubbling in your gut, you run the risk to see if you can sum everything up for him by the time Kirishima comes back-- or at the very least, figure out the nearest exit to gracefully disappear to for the next fifteen minutes or so....
You pull him aside lightly by the wrist, closer to one of the tables of handouts for the event.
"Okay... You have to remember one thing, promise?"
"Yeah?" Bakugou chimes back, entertained.
"This happened before I met you."
His interest doubles, but smile falls, "...yeah?"
"I have not thought about it one day since.."
"... yeah?"
"Remember how I told you," you tread lightly as some students pass you by with some excited waves, "-when I transferred here, I had to work with that proviso license from the Commissions office 'cuz of the whole 'double-triple-check' applicants' liabilities clauses? And mine took forever and a day, because of all those traffic violations that were completely legal where I was last stationed?"
"Uh-huh."
"And that meant I took nothing but graveyard shifts for the first, like, six months... so I basically broke ground solo before the agency could pick up my contract?"
"Uh-huh...?"
Reader sets the scene for a particular alleyway they'd been stationed at, something of a traffic stop role and in prime position for hopping onto the freeway if needed. Helmeted with your visor up, you could keep on coms while getting a little bit of fresh air to keep you awake.
But it's also the sort where villains make their playground meetups and cause some trouble for unsuspecting folks. It's easy work- though trouble could crop up at any time....
Enter the hero you caught sight of across the room: the man you'd watched string up a trio of baddies so expertly, you knew they were never gonna get anywhere near you, so why flinch?
The hero who'd snidely commented how he coulda appreciated the help, but who you assured with a saucy 'you had it under control, hon'.
The hero who you proved yourself to by jumping into action together in a bit of an impromptu high-speed chase.
The hero who ultimately caught your name, but chose to call you 'Speedy' after your impressive performance. Who said you were no rookie like he thought.
The hero who chipped the lip of your helmet in thanks and patted the rear of your bike in a casual move before setting off into the night again, sufficiently making a mark on your fluttering heart as your new favorite hero of Japan.... who you cannot believe you with and who is now approaching over Bakugou's shoulder:
"... AIZAWA?!?"
"Eraserhead," you corrected gracefully.
A flurry of emotions crossed Bakugou's largely incredulous face, though he settled on merely repeating,
"You flirted... with Aizawa?!"
Forcing Bakugou to lower his volume was a lost cause, but you could control yours, "I had-not-met-you-yet-- remember that!"
And was it considered flirting? You could barely get a read on the guy
"Nah, I'm still stuck on my fucking teacher hitting on you... and you called him what?? You know how fuckin' old that guy is?!!"
"Thirty-nine." you fire back immediately.
"--HEH?"
And you can't stop-- though you have the gall to look a little sheepish.
"Scorpio. Ambidextrous. Has a white cat named after the title character of Samurai Jack."
"...."
"Went on Present Mic's show a few months back.. not that I had a notification or anything for when it aired-"
Bakugou stands in a rare moment of silence. Disbelief, rage, shock, and maybe something heated lay behind his eyes, but you honestly can't tell which is going to win out.
".. you're fucking with me."
"I am not."
"
"Absolutely not! Kats, he is never going to single me out of an entire room here, and think back to one patrol night out of thousands, that's ridicul--"
"Bakugou... 'Speedy'."
Alongside Kirishima's proud presence who had been anxiously awaiting this interaction stood Aizawa: fitted with his off-hours eyepatch but who clearly did -in fact- remember you.
As long as you avoid Bakugou's absolute stare of death, you can properly school your reaction to be one of perfect charm; as always when meeting other Pro-Heroes. It's not like you still hold any feelings whatsoever with this man... but you'd truly rather have this conversation anywhere else than beside your darling Katsuki, who's about to blow up if you so much as smile at his former homeroom teacher.
"Should I be scared that you remember me sans helmet, or flattered?" you offer pleasantly.
Aizawa gives a little bow to you before straightening up with a smooth reply, "I never forget a face."
If looks could kill, Shota Aizawa should be collapsing on the spot under Bakugou's eye. And even if you think it's a harmless comment, you know for a fact you'll be paying for it later.
--Scene--
To be continued, m'loves?
TLDR; Bakugou:
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redroomreflections · 4 months ago
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Threads of A Promise - The Loud House One Shot
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Natasha Romanoff x Fem!reader
This is a story directly tied to my fic The Loud House on a03
W/c:6.2k
Summary: Natasha and R are a few years into marriage and experience loss and grief.
Note: this is a glimpse into their earlier years of marriage. a time R has mentioned before.
Trigger warning: mentions of blood. miscarriage. pregnancy
Note: This is a super angsty one-shot. 
"Yes, I've already informed Mr. Davis about the new evidence. We'll review it before the meeting at 10 a.m.," You said, your voice calm and efficient. "Thank you, Susan. See you then." You confirmed as you stood at the counter, slicing fresh vegetables for your breakfast scramble, while Natasha stirred eggs and bacon in a sizzling pan. The smell of cooking filled the air, blending with the quiet sounds of the slow morning routine. You glanced up from your chopping, a small smile on your lips. You loved watching her concentrate on something as simple as cooking. 
“I have back-to-back meetings today,” You sighed as you set your cell phone on the counter. 
“Sounds like a busy morning,” Natasha commented as she reached into the fridge to grab bell peppers for you to dice. You hum in acknowledgment. You passed her the things you’d already chopped to get started on something else. 
"I’m heading to the shelter after work today," You said casually. "They need extra hands for the evening shift."
Natasha turned, a curious look on her face. "Volunteering again? You don’t quit," she said. "You’re going to tire yourself out.” 
You paused, realizing how packed your schedule had become lately. "I know, but it’s important to me," you replied, glancing at Natasha with guilt. "And it’s just a few hours. I’ll be home before dinner. Brandon has Willow for the day. We’re free tonight."
Natasha nodded, her expression softening. "I know you care. Just don’t forget to take care of yourself too."
You smiled gratefully at her, appreciating her understanding. "I won’t forget.”
“Speaking of not forgetting, you’ve set time aside for the insemination appointment tomorrow, right?” Natasha turned off the stove, maneuvering around you to place an omelet on each plate.
“Insemination appointment?” You narrowed your eyes, a flicker of concern crossing your face. “Right, what time is that again?” you asked, trying to hide the uncertainty in your voice. 
Natasha paused, noticing your hesitation. She reached over to gently squeeze your hand. “It’s at 9 a.m. I mentioned it last week, remember?”
You nodded slowly, the memory coming back to you. “Right, 9 a.m.,” You repeated, trying to reassure both Natasha and yourself. “It’s stored up here.” You knocked on your head. You grabbed a protein shake from the fridge and cracked it open. Natasha watched you for a few seconds more. 
“You don’t sound so enthused about it,” She pointed out. “It’s not like you to forget something as important as that. If you’re having second thoughts about us having a baby we can-” 
Natasha’s words hung in the air, her concern palpable. You paused, setting down the protein shake and turning to face her fully. The mix of emotions — nerves, excitement, and a touch of apprehension — played across your features.
“It’s not that,” You began softly, reaching out to take Natasha’s hands in yours. “I want this more than anything. It’s just… everything feels so overwhelming sometimes. Between work, volunteering, and now this…” Your voice trailed off, unsure how to articulate the jumble of emotions swirling inside you. “This being our second round. It just feels…” You stepped closer to her as she reached out her arms for you. 
Natasha’s expression softened, her thumb gently stroking your hand. “We don’t have to do this if you’re not ready,” she said quietly, her love and understanding evident in her eyes.
You shook your head, squeezing her hands reassuringly. “No, I am ready. I know I am. It’s just a lot to take in, you know?” You admitted, feeling a weight lift off your shoulders as you spoke your truth. “I want this for us. We talked about it.”
“And it was my idea in the first place,” Natasha mentioned. “I don’t want you to feel pressured. If a baby isn’t something you want we can just shelve it or reschedule.” 
Natasha’s voice was calm and steady, her concern evident as she watched you closely. Her willingness to accommodate your feelings touched you deeply. 
“I appreciate that,” You replied sincerely, your eyes meeting hers with gratitude. “But I want this, Natasha. I really do. I may be nervous, but I’ve never been surer about anything in my life.”
Natasha smiled warmly, pulling you into a tight hug. “Then that’s all that matters,” she murmured against your ear, her arms holding you close.
“I will be at the appointment,” You said pointedly as you pulled away. You sat on the stool right next to her. 
“What appointment?” Brandon your brother asked as he carried a half-dressed Willow into the kitchen. He shook his head. He didn’t have the time to question it. He reached over to your plate, scooping a mouthful of eggs.“Sorry, we’re running late for preschool. I have class in about forty minutes so we have to rush. Can one of you tell her to put her shoes on?” He begged knowing she would listen to you. 
“Hi, Mama,” Willow waved as Brandon set her down on her feet. She raced straight for Natasha and held her arms out expectantly. 
Natasha smiled warmly, scooping Willow up into her arms. “Hey, sweetie! Let’s get those shoes on, okay?”
You chuckled softly, watching the familiar scene unfold. “We’ve got it covered, Brandon. Go ahead, we’ll take care of the shoes and school.”
Brandon nodded gratefully, quickly grabbing his things before heading toward the door. “Thanks, guys! See you later, Willow. Love you!”
“Bye, Daddy!” Willow called out cheerfully, wiggling her toes as Natasha gently slipped on her shoes.
Natasha glanced over at you with a fond smile. “Looks like we’re on shoe duty,” she teased gently, her eyes sparkling with affection. 
You nodded, feeling a warm sense of contentment settle over you as you helped Willow get ready for her day. Moments like these reminded you of the family you were building together. Soon there would be two little people running around. It didn’t sound so bad. 
***********
"I know you've been worried," You murmured, your voice barely above a whisper. "About whether I'm still... in this."
Natasha tightened her hold on you, rubbing her fingers across your bare skin. "I... I just want this so much for us," she admitted quietly. 
"Natasha, I am in this," You reassured, your words steady and earnest. "I want a baby too. You’ve never had to convince me. Not truly. Having a family with you is a dream. Whatever that looks like for us. We will get there.” 
Natasha rested her chin on your shoulder, her breath warm against your neck. "I know," she whispered, her voice trembling slightly. "It's just... sometimes I worry that I'm not doing enough, that I can't give you everything you deserve."
"You give me everything," You said firmly, your eyes locking with Natasha's. "I don’t want you to doubt yourself or worry.” 
Natasha pressed a kiss to your forehead. She felt more at ease about this entire thing. 
*************
Coming to the doctor’s office isn’t always the breath of fresh air you wish it to be. You dislike hospitals and by extension this clinic. The examination room is cool and sterile, the hum of medical equipment a constant background noise. You lay on the padded table, your hand clasped tightly in Natasha's. You tried to think on the bright side of all this. You would be pregnant. There would be a happy baby with your skin and Natasha’s smile. Your treasure at the end of the rainbow. 
Dr. Patel entered the room, her demeanor calm and professional. "Y/n, Natasha, good to see you both," she greeted warmly. "Are you ready to get started?"
You nodded, your grip on Natasha's hand tightening slightly. "Yes, we're ready."
Natasha gave you an encouraging smile. "We're in this together," she whispered, kissing your knuckles. All you needed was her comfort right now. 
Dr. Patel moved to the end of the table, preparing the necessary instruments. "This will be a quick procedure," she explained. "I’ll walk you through each step as we go."
You took a deep breath, focusing on Natasha's reassuring presence by her side. "We've got this," you murmured, more to yourself than anyone else.
Natasha leaned in closer, her thumb gently stroking your hand. "We do," she affirmed softly.
You took another deep breath as the nurse positioned the ultrasound equipment on your abdomen. The cool gel and gentle pressure of the transducer were a familiar sensation, grounding you in the moment. This was the easy part. 
After a bunch of medical stuff you’d rather not remember you could hear the murmur of the staff talking with each other. 
"The embryos are ready," the embryologist announced, handing the catheter containing the precious cargo to Dr. Patel.
She began the procedure, her movements precise and efficient. "I'm going to insert the catheter now," she explained. "You might feel a little pressure, but it shouldn’t be painful."
You nodded, your eyes never leaving Natasha's. As the procedure progressed, the room seemed to shrink around you, the outside world fading away. It was just the two of you, your hopes and dreams intertwined in this pivotal moment.
Natasha leaned closer, her voice a soothing whisper. "We’re almost there, love. Just breathe."
You nodded, her grip tightening as Dr. Patel carefully inserted the catheter through your cervix and into your uterus. The room was silent, save for the soft hum of the ultrasound machine, as everyone focused on the delicate task.
After a few minutes, Dr. Patel finished the insemination and stepped back. "All done," she said with a reassuring smile. "Now we wait. I’ll schedule a follow-up appointment in two weeks to check on everything."
You exhaled a breath you didn’t realize you were holding. "The second time’s the charm right?” You felt Natasha’s gentle kiss against your forehead. 
*********
Two lines. Two. The test was positive. Pregnant. Natasha’s baby was inside you. You were pregnant. The thought left you breathless and giddy. Here you were at home on a Monday afternoon, the only time you'd get alone in the house, staring at two pregnancy tests. You’d waited three weeks. It was hard to satiate Natasha's curiosity, but you wanted to be sure this time. And now, here you were, with two sticks confirming your dreams. You slid down onto the bathroom floor, overwhelmed. You could hardly believe it. There was a baby inside you.
There are so many people you want to call right now but you’d rather keep it to yourself. You want Natasha to be the first person to know. 
“Oh God!” You gasped, holding the sticks in your hands. You’re going to be a mom. You’re going to have a baby. There’s life growing inside of you.
A whirlwind of emotions surged through you—excitement, joy, and a touch of anxiety. The reality of it all was immense. Would you be a good mother? Could you balance your career and this new life you were bringing into the world? The questions swirled in your mind, but the overwhelming feeling was one of pure, unadulterated happiness.
You thought about Natasha's reaction. Her eyes lit up, her hands gently touching your stomach, the way she would pull you into a tight embrace, whispering promises of a beautiful future together. The thought made your heart swell with love and anticipation.
You stood up slowly, still clutching the pregnancy tests, and looked at your reflection in the mirror. A wide smile spread across your face, despite the tears that began to blur your vision. This was real. This was happening. You were going to be a mom. You and the love of your life are going to have a baby. 
*********
So you may have gone overboard with preparation. You only had a few hours until Natasha was home, but you wanted to make this special. You’d traveled to Target and then a few other stores to find the perfect little trinkets for a pregnancy announcement. 
Back home, you laid out your finds on the kitchen table: a tiny pair of Avengers-themed baby booties, the two pregnancy tests you’d taken earlier, and a baby onesie that read "Future Avenger in Training." You smiled, knowing how much Natasha would love the references. 
You set to work, arranging everything in a cute gift box. You carefully wrapped the baby booties in tissue paper and placed them at the bottom. On top, you added the pregnancy tests. Finally, you laid the onesie on top, its message visible as soon as the box was opened.
As you worked, a wave of excitement washed over you, momentarily pushing aside your earlier anxiety. This was your moment, and you wanted it to be perfect. You added a note to the box, written in your neatest handwriting:
"To my amazing wife, the strongest Avenger, and soon-to-be mom. I can't wait to embark on this incredible journey with you. Love, y/n."
With the box prepared, you set it in the living room, positioning it where Natasha would see it as soon as she walked in. You took a step back, admiring your handiwork. It was simple yet heartfelt, and you knew Natasha would appreciate the thought and effort you put into it.
Now, all that was left to do was wait. You glanced at the clock, feeling the minutes tick by slowly. Your heart raced with anticipation as you imagined Natasha's reaction. Would she cry? Laugh? Probably both, knowing her.
Finally, you heard the familiar sound of the front door opening. Natasha was home. You took a deep breath, steadying yourself as you prepared to share the most wonderful news. You could hear the subtle footsteps from Natasha as she shuffled through the foyer, dropping her keys in the bowl, before she made her way through the house. She didn’t even know you were home so she takes a little more time than usual. Finally, you became impatient. 
“Hey, babe,” You called out to her. “Can you come here?”
You heard the light shuffling of footsteps as Natasha made her way to the living room. She paused in the doorway, taking in the scene before her. The small gift box sat on the coffee table, your handwriting visible on the note.
"Y/N, what is this?" She asked, her voice laced with curiosity and a hint of amusement. “I didn’t know you’d be home so soon. I would have picked up food or something.”
“I’m not hungry,” You couldn't contain your grin as you motioned for her to open the box. "Just a little something I put together," you said coyly. "I think you'll like it."
Natasha picked up the box, her gaze darting between you and the gift. She read the note first, glancing at you with tears in her eyes before she opened the box. Her gasp was telling and her reaction was instant. She moved to hug you, pulling you tightly against her, and kissing your head. 
"Oh, y/n," she choked out, her emotions getting the best of her. "I can't believe it. We're going to be moms. Are you happy?"
You clung to her, your tears threatening to spill. "I know," you said, your voice thick with emotion. "I'm so happy, Tasha."
She pulled back slightly, her eyes shining with tears and pure joy. She cupped your cheek, stroking it gently with her thumb.
“We’re going to have a baby,” Natasha said. “Your belly’s going to get so big.” 
"I know," you giggled, imagining the future. "But it'll be worth it. To see you and our baby...it'll all be worth it."
She laughed, her face radiating pure joy. “Thank you, thank you, thank you,” She hugged you to her, lifting you off your feet and spinning in a circle. "I love you, I love you so much," She said.
"I love you too," You couldn't hold back the happy tears. "We're going to have a baby, Tasha."
"I can't believe it," She said, kissing you again. "I can't wait to tell everyone."
You couldn't stop smiling. This was truly the beginning of the rest of your lives.
********
After a lot of prompting, you and Natasha decided to keep everything a secret until the second trimester. Which was a feat within itself. There was so much you wanted to say. Your family was huge and so was Natasha’s. The entire Avengers team always knew all of your business but this time was different. You hadn’t even told Brandon yet as you wanted to keep this just between the two of you. 
You and Natasha had your little secret. A baby. Well, not a baby yet. 
“Our baby’s the size of a blueberry right now,” Natasha mentioned to you as you brushed your teeth. After a bout of morning sickness, you needed to feel clean. Your first appointment was today. Hopefully, you’d get to hear the baby’s heartbeat. “Maybe that’s what we should call him. Blueberry.” 
You smiled around your toothbrush, spitting the paste out into the sink. You rinsed and turned to look at Natasha. "That's actually a really cute name," you said. "It's unique and special. How are you so sure our baby is a boy?"
She shrugged, leaning against the doorway. "Just a feeling," she replied, a soft smile gracing her lips. "A mother's intuition."
"Well, you'll be the most badass boy mama there ever was," You leaned up to kiss her. 
“How do you like the name James?” She asked. 
“You’re already thinking of names too? You’re light years ahead of me,” You laughed. Natasha smiled, wrapping her arms around your waist and pulling you close. "James Romanoff-L/N," you said, testing the name out. "I love it."
"Me too," She agreed, kissing the side of your head. 
"What if Blueberry is a girl though? Would be pretty hard to walk around with that name."
Natasha chuckled. "Well, we'll cross that bridge when we get to it," she replied. "But whatever we choose, I know they'll be perfect."
An hour later you’re lying in a familiar position, the transducer against your belly as you listen to OB/GYN talk. 
“You’re seven weeks today right?” Dr. Wendell estimated "According to your chart and baby's size."
Natasha looks at you, nodding her head. This is it. Your first sonogram.
She squeezes your hand, her eyes never leaving the screen. "This is so surreal," she whispered, her gaze transfixed on the black-and-white image.
You grinned, the excitement palpable. "I know," you murmured, your eyes locked on the grainy image.
You and Natasha both watched as the doctor maneuvered the transducer across your stomach, searching for the best angle. "There we go," she said after a moment, her finger tracing the tiny speck on the screen. "Your baby."
You gasped, the realization hitting you. "Our baby," you breathed, your heart swelling with love and joy. "Wow."
Natasha pressed a gentle kiss to the back of your hand, her eyes glistening with tears. "I can't believe we're really doing this," she said, her voice thick with emotion.
This picture was the most beautiful thing you’d ever seen. 
“In about 4 weeks you will be able to see the sex of the baby,” Dr. Wendell informed you. “You guys can come back then. For now, everything looks healthy.” 
"This is really happening," Natasha whispered, her eyes filled with wonder and joy. "We're going to be moms."
You leaned into her side, basking in the warmth of her presence. This was the happiest you’d ever been. 
********
Of course, with pregnancy comes pregnancy symptoms. Morning sickness, sensitive breasts, and fatigue. The fatigue had to be the worst part. You could fall asleep anywhere these days: at your desk, as soon as you got home, even in the shower. It’s a miracle you’d been able to keep up with everything. Which is why you said yes to tonight. Tony and the rest of the team were having a family dinner, and you wanted to be there. You wanted everything to be normal for you.
As you prepared for the evening, you felt a wave of exhaustion wash over you. You glanced at the clock, wishing for a quick nap but knowing you didn’t have time. Instead, you splashed cold water on your face, hoping it would give you the boost you needed to get through the night.
Natasha found you in the bathroom, her concerned eyes meeting yours in the mirror. “You okay?” she asked, wrapping her arms around you from behind.
“Just tired,” you admitted, leaning into her embrace. “But I really want to go tonight. I miss everyone.”
Natasha kissed your temple gently. “You sure? We can stay home and rest if you need to.”
You shook your head, turning to face her. “No, I want to go. I need a bit of normalcy. Besides, I miss seeing you with the team. It’ll be fun.”
Natasha studied your face for a moment before nodding. “Alright, but promise me you’ll let me know if you need to leave early. Your health comes first.”
“I promise,” you said, smiling up at her. 
“You’re starting to show,” She smirked. 
“Am I? It just looks like I ate a big breakfast,” You grinned as she rested her hand on your belly. 
"You're beautiful," she murmured, her hand resting protectively over your growing bump.
The dinner party was just the kind of escape you needed. Seeing all your friends, laughing, eating, and dancing made you happy . Keeping baby Romanoff a secret for a little while longer would be a feat but you could do it. 
The drive to Tony’s was filled with your usual banter, but you couldn’t ignore the growing fatigue. By the time you arrived, you were already craving your bed. Still, you put on a brave face, determined to enjoy the evening.
The warmth and laughter that greeted you as you walked into the compound made the effort worthwhile. It felt good to be surrounded by friends who were more like family.
As the night progressed, you found yourself slipping into conversations, laughing at Tony’s jokes, and watching Natasha interact with the team. She was in her element, and seeing her so happy filled your heart with joy.
But the fatigue was relentless. You found a quiet corner to sit down, hoping to rest for a moment without anyone noticing. Natasha, ever-attentive, quickly picked up on your exhaustion and made her way over to you.
“Hey, you holding up okay?” she asked, concern etched in her features.
“Yeah, just needed a breather,” You admitted, rubbing your tired eyes.
Natasha nodded and took your hand. “How about we sneak away early? I’m sure Tony will understand.”
You hesitated for a moment, glancing around at your friends. “No, I’m fine. I’m just going to go into the kitchen and drink some water. I want another hour.” 
“If you’re sure,” Natasha looked at you suspiciously. 
“I’m positive,” You nodded. 
Natasha helped you up and watched as you quietly walked into the kitchen. In the kitchen, you grabbed a glass and filled your cup with ice. The water was refreshing and freezing cold. Just as you liked it. The hot flashes were no joke either. 
“I believe congratulations are in order,” Wanda’s voice startled you as she entered the kitchen. 
“Wanda? How did you know?”
“I’m a witch remember?” She smiled. “Don’t worry. I won’t tell the others.” 
You chuckled, feeling relief at her promise. “Thanks, Wanda. It’s still early, and I want to keep it between Natasha and me for a bit longer.”
Wanda nodded understandingly. “Of course. How are you feeling?”
You took a deep breath, leaning against the counter. “Excited, anxious, exhausted… all of it. The symptoms are hitting me hard, but I’m managing.”
Wanda’s eyes softened with empathy. “If you need any support, magical or otherwise, you know you can count on me.”
“Thank you, Wanda. That means a lot,” you said sincerely.
She gave you a reassuring smile. “You’re going to be a great mom, y/n. And Natasha will be an amazing co-parent.”
Hearing those words, you felt a wave of emotion wash over you. “I hope so. We’ve wanted this for so long.”
Wanda placed a comforting hand on your shoulder. “You two are one of the strongest couples I know. You’ll handle whatever comes your way.”
You nodded, feeling bolstered by her words. “That means a lot, Wanda.”You smiled and took another sip of your water, the coldness helping to steady you. 
Together, you walked back into the living room. Natasha’s eyes met yours, her concern melting into a smile as she saw you were feeling better. You gave her a reassuring nod and rejoined the group, determined to make the most of the evening with your chosen family.
********
At night, as your pregnancy progressed, Natasha’s obsession with your baby became more apparent. You were barely showing and it was all she could think about. Whenever it was time for bed she’d spend a few minutes massaging your belly and grinning at you. "Blueberry is still a blueberry," You mentioned to her. "He's not going to turn into a watermelon overnight."
"I know, but I love feeling him," Natasha said, her voice full of awe. "And besides, blueberry is growing."
"Just barely," You joked. "I'm not even ten weeks yet."
Natasha chuckled, placing a soft kiss against your stomach. "Well, he's still the cutest little blueberry I've ever seen," she said.
"He is, isn't he?"
"How are you feeling?" Natasha said as she came up to look into your eyes. When her hand touches your breast accidentally she quickly apologizes. You've become way too sensitive and any form of touch, accidental or not practically sends you into shock.
"Sensitive," You answer truthfully. "I think the baby is making them grow."
"I've noticed," She smirks. "No morning sickness?"
"There's always that but it's manageable," You shrug.
She kisses your cheek, hugging you to her. "Good," she whispers, her hands coming down to rest on your stomach again. "I want the both of you healthy."
"I'm trying my best," You reassure her.
"I know," She said. "But you're still my responsibility."
"Oh, is that what we're calling it?"
"Yes, I'm the boss," She kissed you softly.
"Well, boss, can you cut the lights out, I'd like to sleep now," You closed your eyes.
"As you wish,"  She turns off the lights before spooning you. She holds you close, one arm wrapped securely around your waist, her hand resting on your stomach. "Sleep well, my loves."
*********
Nine weeks, two days, and five hours. That’s how long you got to spend with blueberry safely housed inside of you. You’d woken up that morning like any other day. It’s a PTO day. You, Natasha, and Willow were supposed to spend it in the park. When you opened your eyes, you felt an unsettling feeling in the base of your belly. A slight ache you’d never experienced before. Dr. Wendell and Dr. Patel mentioned there would be some cramping but this felt different. The moment you felt a slight wetness between your thighs you knew. 
You slipped from the bed, hoping not to wake Natasha, as you rushed into your ensuite bathroom. 
In one swift motion, you'd thrown the toilet lid up and pushed your panties down.
It was too late.
You'd caught sight of the bright red stain on the once pristine white cotton and immediately burst into tears.
This was all the confirmation you needed. It was over. Blueberry was gone.
Spotting is normal too. You’d read countless online articles that confirmed this very thing. This isn't spotting. You reach blindly for toilet paper, tearing off a decent amount, before you wipe. It won't stop. There's so much. So much.
You're shaking as you kick your underwear to the side, the stain obvious now. You can't help but cry as you stumble over to the bathtub. You know you should get Natasha. You should yell out to her and she would come running. Instead, you lock the door. You turn on the shower and position yourself against the bottom of the tub. The dull ache is now stronger. There's nothing anyone can do for you.
You don't remember how long you sat under the warm spray of the water. The tears wouldn’t stop. They keep flowing like a never-ending stream. You couldn’t breathe.
Outside of the bathroom, Natasha awakened to find your side of the bed empty. She hummed contently as she stretched before she reached out to pull you closer. Only you aren't there.
"Y/n?" Natasha called out, her eyes searching the room. When you didn’t respond, she frowned. "Y/n? Babe, where are you?"
Natasha pulled herself out of bed, her brow furrowed as she searched the room. The bathroom door was closed, and she could hear the faint sound of running water.
"Y/n?" Natasha tried the doorknob, but it was locked.
Natasha frowned, concern etched on her face. "Y/n, open the door," she called out, her voice slightly muffled by the door.
There was no answer.
Natasha jiggled the handle again, more forcefully this time. You never truly lock doors. Natasha doesn't want to break the door down. She needed you to open it.
"Babe, please, open the door," Natasha pleaded, her voice laced with worry. "You're scaring me."
"Go away," You yelled back weakly. "I'm fine. Just please go away." You don't want her to see you like this. You don't want her to know that you lost the baby. You don't want to disappoint her. You couldn't be the one who failed.
"I'm not going anywhere," Natasha replied, her tone firm. "Now, open the door."
"No!" You cried out, your voice was raw with emotion. "Please, just leave me alone."
"Y/n," Natasha's voice was soft, but you can hear the underlying concern. "Please, just let me in. Whatever it is, we can get through it together." Natasha doesn't wait a moment longer. She squared her shoulders and kicked the door down. The sound of wood splintering is the only sound you can hear as the door gives way.
"Oh, y/n," Natasha gasped as she took in the scene before her. The tub was half-full of water and the bottom was stained red. Her eyes flew to you half awake and lying tiredly against the cold tile. You're sitting in a pool of blood. Natasha immediately rushed over to you, her eyes filled with concern and worry. "Y/n, baby. I think we need to go to a hospital. " She swallowed thickly.
"No," You choke out, shaking your head. "No, I hate hospitals."
"There's too much blood, y/n," Natasha attempted to convince you.
"I'll be fine," You said, your voice trembling slightly. "Just need to stay in the shower a little longer."
Natasha shook her head. "We don't have any longer. You can't stay like this. Baby, I can't let you stay like this." She turned off the water, calling out for Brandon as she began to scoop you up. You crumple in her arms, whimpering at the pain you feel from the movement. "I'm sorry baby. I know it hurts. I'm going to take you to a hospital."
"Nat," You mumbled.
"What is it, baby? What can I do?" She asked, her eyes searching yours.
"Don't let go."
"Never."
"What's going on?" Brandon tiredly stepped into your ensuite. He didn’t need to ask as he spotted the blood. "Holy fuck, what do you need me to do? I'll drive you."
"No, you have Willow," Natasha murmured. She was unsure what to do but she knew she needed to act fast. "I am going to drive her. Just call ahead and let them know we're coming."
Brandon nodded, already heading out the door. "Will do."
"I've got you," Natasha whispered as she carried you through the apartment. She held you tightly, her arms wrapped protectively around you.
"I'm sorry," You whimpered into her neck tiredly. You were in so much pain. The cramps were excruciating.
"It's not your fault, baby. None of this is your fault," Natasha reassured you, her voice filled with emotion.
"I'm sorry," You whispered again. It was all you could say.
"Shh, don't apologize," Natasha soothed. "You did nothing wrong."
Natasha managed to get you into her car without causing too much distress. Your clothes were soaked through with blood, but you didn't care. She just needed to get help. 
***********
These kinds of things happen they say. There’s not always an answer. It’s crazy how just a few weeks ago you’d gotten a heartbeat. You’d been able to see your baby’s tiny little body on a screen and now nothing. You feel empty. Stepping back into your home, to no baby, no future. 
It's like everything has changed. It's as if the color has faded and the world has lost its luster. Everything feels hollow. There's a deep emptiness inside of you.
"Let's get you to bed," Natasha murmured, her arms tight around you as she guided you to the bedroom. After spending three days in the hospital coming home felt weird. She'd asked Brandon to hire cleaners to come and tidy everything. She'd paid them a hefty amount to make sure no trace or memory of what happened that day was here.
You were quiet as Natasha helped you into bed, her hands gentle as she pulled the covers over you. You lay there, staring blankly at the wall, the ache in your chest only growing with each passing moment.
"Do you need anything?" She asked. Her voice was soft and soothing, but you couldn't bring yourself to respond.
You didn't deserve this. This is a punishment. A test. For what you can't say but that's the only explanation.
You hadn't spoken since before she brought you to the hospital. You couldn't bring yourself to speak. Natasha had been by your side the whole time, never leaving you alone. She'd held your hand, rubbed your back, and even sang softly to you. But nothing she did seemed to reach you. She felt hopeless.
She took one last look at you before she stood.
"I want the ultrasound picture," You requested quietly.
"Of course, love?" She searched your nightstand for it. It pained her to look at it too.
"And the little booties,"
Natasha handed you the photo and booties, watching as you cradled them close to your chest. She could see the tears welling in your eyes.
"Can I hold you?" She asked. You hadn't been open to her touch and comfort so it was a bit of a long shot.
You nodded, holding your arms out for her. She crawled into bed, curling up beside you. You leaned into her, resting your head on her shoulder. She wrapped her arms around you, pulling you closer.
"I'm sorry, Nat," You began. "I'm sorry I lost our baby."
"Don't apologize, love," Natasha whispered. "This isn't your fault. These things just happen. There was nothing you could have done. I know how much you wanted this. How much we both wanted this." You could try again. That part was left unsaid. Only because she knows you and knew it wouldn't be comforting in the slightest.
"This is the second time," You furrowed your brows. "This was our second try. I did everything right. Right? I took all of my vitamins. I only exercised lightly." You were starting to ramble.
"You were perfect," Natasha reassured you. "You are perfect. This doesn't mean that it will never happen. There's still a chance."
"What if it doesn't happen?" You whispered. You swallowed thickly. "I don't think I want to try again. Please don't make me go through that again."
Natasha stroked your hair, pressing a soft kiss against the top of your head. "Whatever you want, love. I'll support you."
"I'm not sure how to feel," You confessed. "I know I didn't act like it at times. I wanted this baby. I wanted him. He was mine. He was ours. We were so close to our dream."
"We were," Natasha agreed.
"Why is this so hard?" You cried, burying your face into her chest.
"I don't know, love," Natasha soothed, rubbing circles on your back.
"I wanted to welcome him into this world," You sobbed. "We won't get to do that. He won't get to experience anything. His heart was beating and then it stopped. Why? Why did it stop?"
"Shh," Natasha soothed. If she didn't calm you down soon you were going to become hysterical.
"He was a baby. A precious innocent little baby. We made a baby. We were pregnant," You cried, clinging to her. "Why does everything have to be so fucking hard? It's not fair."
"I know, baby. I know," Natasha whispered, stroking your hair. "It's okay. Let it out. Just let it out."
You couldn't stop crying. You sobbed and sobbed.
How could you ever be okay after this? A baby with Natasha was all you wanted. A family with your wife. His heartbeat was the most beautiful music you'd ever heard. And it's gone.
Your cries soon turn into soft whimpers and your whimpers turn into sniffles. The room is silent. Natasha continues to hold you, her arms tight around you.
our little family - a continuation
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yeeterthek33per · 1 year ago
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It hurts (but I've got you)(Katrina Gorry x reader)
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A/n I'm gonna warn everyone right now. This one is gonna get dark. It's a fresh loss, and I'm feeling ridiculously angsty. Warnings include mental illness, unaliving mentions, past abuse, self degradation, and panic attack warnings. and some seriously dark thoughts. A lot of mentions of trauma coping. Seriously, do not read if you guys can't cope with it or if it triggers you.
Also, this isn't the only Gorry fic I'm writing atm 😅
----------
It felt like you knew the moment your fiancee had been subbed off that this game was it.
3-1 down with just 3 minutes left of regulation time. Even with stoppage, nothing felt like enough. None of you were processing Tony's yells from the sideline, none of you could feel the rush you needed to.
And they just kept coming at you. The exhaustion was setting in and nobody could keep up with them anymore.
Sam couldn't get the touches she needed to.
Mackenzie wasn't communicating well with the girls at the back, and they weren't aggressing like they needed to
You felt helpless in the chaos, despite being in the midfield. Your passes weren't connecting, and every touch you had felt like it was a turnover to England.
It felt like Chidi wasn't being given enough time to work her magic. The English defence was reduced to several layers of blue. None of the strikers up front had the energy to challenge that.
Steph was completely out of it, Caitlin was trying, but she didn't have the strength.
In the end, none of your attempts were enough, and it was weighing on you like a pile of bricks. You felt sick. To the point where your sobs nearly turned to dry heaving.
You'd collapsed to the turf the moment the whistle blew. Hiding your head in your knees, you avoided any possible camera angles of your face, not wanting to be seen losing it like you were.
You could barely budge when you felt a hand on your back.
Everything was just overwhelming... not processing, but still somehow all setting in at once.
You felt several pats on the back over the course of a couple of minutes. You assumed the England players. Proven when you heard your old teammate Alessia, rubbing your back and mumbling to you how proud she was of you, especially watching you play throughout the cup.
You could barely acknowledge the blonde though.
Everything was screaming in your ears, all the pressure, the deafening silence of the crowd aside from the few England fans that did show up, the players off the side of the pitch yelling and celebrating.
The first person to force you out of your shell, though, was Katrina. She's knelt in front of you and tugs at your arms, pulling them from around your head and urges you into her embrace. You meet her eyes enough to see the tears, and that just sends you further. You feel like you failed her.
It didn't feel like enough. Nothing you did during that game was enough. Her voice is shaky but it's soothing enough to get you to slow your tears, but it's just piling up behind walls in your head at this point. It's being boxed up and padlocked.
Your first reflex is to apologise. And you do.
"I'm so sorry, it wasn't enough, I wasn't trying hard enough, I failed you."
Katrina feels her own heart crack a little further, hearing those words come from you. You'd played your heart out this entire world cup.
You were exhausted. You all were. But you couldn't see that you were doing all you could. It hurt more than anything to know you were blaming yourself for this. Though she fully expected it. You were still learning to process losses like this. She was hoping you'd made enough progress in case a loss like this happened.
It was something you'd both been working on. It's one of your childhood traumas. Losses were ingrained into you like life failures. You'd been taught from a young age that failure was never an option. That it resulted in beatings.
That it meant you should die.
That was something that you'd ingrained into yourself as a coping mechanism while you were still with your foster family.
Katrina knew of the abuse, but she didn't know much about the state of your mental health. It was something you'd only recently opened up with. Little by little, but not a lot.
It bounced around your head like a mantra.
You failed, it's over.
You failed.
You failed.
You're gently brought back out of your head, Katrina's hands on either side of your face, her thumb caressing your cheek, her forehead leant against yours.
"Look at me, baby, breathe, just listen to me, okay? You're in your head too much. Just listen to me and try to breathe with me. C'mon baby, you can do it. Come back to me."
You try to match her breathing. You hadn't even realised the panic attack had hit you.
Your chest was heaving, and you managed to slow it down a little.
"That's it, my sweet girl. You've got it."
You try to take in her words.
Just breathe.
You're a failure.
You're okay.
You've got this.
You fucking useless-.
Just breathe Y/n.
Breathe.
It's okay.
You're safe.
"That's it, you're safe here, Baby. You did so well."
Her lips press a kiss to your forehead.
"That's it, baby girl. You did it. I'm so proud of you."
Her hands shift to your neck to rub at it gently. Her nails scratch at the skin lightly, and you let it distract you. Your breathing is finally relaxed enough to let her pull you to your feet.
You almost can't bring yourself to look around. But you pick up your head and take a deep breath as Katrina keeps you looking at her.
"That's it, Y/n, that's it."
You close your eyes and take a final deep breath, and then meet her eyes again. You feel guilty for dropping this on her right now. Now is not the time for her to need to comfort you.
So you stone wall it back and fake a little relaxation in her arms.
"I'm good, I'm good, I'm okay. I-...I'm"
Sorry. I'm sorry.
You didn't say it out loud, but her face immediately shifts, and it seems you don't have to. It's almost like she can read your mind.
"Hey, no, uh uh. None of that, you don't need to apologise to me. You're my girl, and you're allowed to be vulnerable around me. I'm always gonna be here for you. Don't ever apologise for not being able to handle things on your own."
You let out a shaky breath, tilting your head back, blinking back any tears.
You've got this.
You nod, whiping away tears.
She rubs your shoulder softly. And you finally manage to look around at your teammates. A few of them are still just... sitting... contemplating the game.
Sam in particular. She looks like she's holding it in just about as much as you are, although more than likely a little better. The disappointment is still fresh in her eyes, though, and you can't quite face your best friend just yet. So you move to hug the others.
Katrina follows behind you a little. Not directly, but enough to keep a close eye on you as you console the girls. Charli and Kyra stick by her as well. The two of them had been the first to go to her after the whistle blew.
Though they do come find you after a few minutes. You were marrying their practically adoptive mother, after all. That and you were family to them as well.
Charli is the first to reach you. You let her hold you for a few minutes, and you rub at her back as well.
"Thanks, Cha Cha, I'm sorry you didn't get the chance to play today like we'd hoped."
She shakes her head.
"Doesn't matter. You all played the best you could today. I'm so proud of each and every one of you."
Your eyes well up a little bit, but you suck it back in.
"I know."
She ruffles your hair a little bit, managing a small goofy smile, and it gives you enough to let out a watery laugh.
"Atta girl."
It gets a little easier to breathe after that. And you find it easier to approach Kyra too.
"Hey, kiddo."
"I'm sorry it had to end like this."
"Not your fault, Ky. You played the best you could today."
You're quick to envelope her, too, pulling her into your chest, resting your head on hers. She's a little shaky but she's coping.
You both start to walk the pitch after that. Beginning to applaud the crowd for their support throughout the tournament.
It still stings. You know it will for a while. But each step is an easier breath. For now at least.
But at that, with each step comes a new echo in your head that you have to push down. It helps having your family there with you. Your real family.
You don't even register the huddle or the locker room talk.
When you get on the bus, Katrina is quick to shove her way into the seat beside you. Not that she has to, really. There's this unspoken rule about the team. Katrina is always next to you after a loss. They know it's for good reason, but they never pry or ask why.
By the time you're back to the team hotel. Its late and everybody returns to their own rooms.
You try convincing Katrina that you'll be fine, that you're just tired, but she's adamant about staying in your room. She reads you like an open book. Truthfully, you definitely aren't fine, and being on your own is not something she's wants for you right now. Harper is with Linda, Katrina's mother, thankfully, so she doesn't have to see this.
You go to join her in saying goodnight to her daughter, but she tells you to stay put for now. You can see her tomorrow.
You almost whine saying you missed the two year old, but you know not to push it, and you know you aren't in the right headspace to be around her right now.
You get ready for bed, and it only takes ten minutes for your girl to return again.
"She's doing fine, a little confused why Cha Cha didn't wanna play Aeroplane tonight, but she went down without much fuss."
You smiled a little at that, Harps was such an easygoing kid. It was hard not to fall in love with such a sweet little thing. Being in love with her mother certainly didn't help prevent that either.
"I'm glad she's doing okay then."
Katrina swaps out her (your) hoodie for one of your sleep shirts and strips down to just underwear.
"I think we'd both be a little better if her mama was too, though." It's not even subtle. You know she's not trying to be. She never is. She's gentle about it, though.
"What do you mean? I'm perfectly fine." It's said in a joking tone, but the unimpressed brow you get makes you feel a little guilty for that one.
"You want to talk about what happened?"
"Want to or want to?"
"You have to want to talk about it before we get anywhere. I won't force it out of you, I know it's still so fresh, but you need to want to before we can talk, sweetheart."
You sigh a little, resting against the wall behind the bed. You think about it for a minute. Before ultimately deciding to just hold on to it for a bit longer.
"Not just yet."
She nods in understanding.
"I'm here when you're ready baby."
"Maybe in the morning, it's just a little more tender than I'd like."
You still feel bad, though. Katrina played the same game you did. Lost the same game you did. Yet you couldn't handle it the same way.
You slip under the covers, and she joins you, slipping under, on her side and behind, spooning you. Her arm tucks itself over your waist, pulling you back into her shorter self. In that moment, you let her warmth lull you to sleep, thoughts of regret and guilt still plaguing your mind.
-------
It's weird. You've never seen Sam mad like this before. She's always been a relatively calm captain. Even after losses this big. You'd never seen her raise her voice at another teammate. Sure, sometimes people do stupid shit, and she has to pull them aside to speak with them, or lightly scold them, and that usually works, but...
Here you were.
She'd asked you to come to the meeting room downstairs first thing this morning. She's been yelling at you for the past five minutes. With each sentence, you just shrink, smaller and smaller, and it's like you're back on the pitch again.
"How could you let this happen?! Why did it take eight of you to let them through?! After all that hard work? How hard is it to keep them out?!"
"I-"
"How hard is it?! You're a defensive midfielder. You should know you have to keep them out, and you failed me!"
"Sam I-."
"You fucking let me down, I am absolutely fucking disgusted with you y/l. Why did you think it was okay?!"
"Sam, I'm sorry I-"
"'Sorry' isn't a fucking excuse, you knew you couldn't let us lose and you fucking let me down. You let them all down, you fucking failed us."
You're sobbing at this point, barely able to get a word in. You're curled up in the corner of the room, and Sam is standing over you. You can barely register the feel of artificial turf beneath you as the blaring lights of the stadium nearly blind you.
She's still yelling, but it's like she's muffled now.
Off to the side even.
You look up around you. She's still yelling, but you can't hear her over the crunching of grass beneath a pair of leather loafers. It screams in your ears, almost painfully. You know those sounds all too well.
Your foster father walks towards you slowly, with purpose. His belt bent and tucked back into his hand again.
"What did I tell you would happen, Jessica?"
It makes you tremble, and your body is rooted to the spot. You feel like you can't move. He always tried to force the name on you. Your foster mother just let it happen.
You open your mouth to protest, but all that comes out are more sobs and half met pleas. He's standing right over you now. His arm raises the belt in the air. And right before he brings it down. You see the angry and disappointed faces of everyone. Sam still yelling.
Steph, Caitlin, Charli, Kyra, Ellie. Katrina stands on her own, shaking her head at you. She turns away right as the belt comes down.
-----
Your eyes blink open. You feel the stickiness of dried tears on your face, fresh ones replacing them quickly.
You have to take a quick few breaths to gather your surroundings again.
It's okay. You're in your room. He's not here to hurt you.
Katrina's arm is looser around your waist now. You're tucked into her front but on your back now, and she's dead asleep on the pillow beside yours.
It's okay.
You're safe.
How could you let this happen?
Fucking dumbass.
Worthless piece of-.
That's all it takes for you to carefully slip out from under the covers. Careful not to jostle your sleeping fiancee. You couldn't get the look of disappointment on her face out of your head.
She'd looked completely done with you. She couldn't even look at you. She was so disappointed.
Tears were still flowing from your eyes. Your breathing was starting to become more rapid as you slipped out of the room's door, a small click behind you as you shut it.
You couldn’t stay here.
That was all you could think about. There was no way security would let out at this hour without questions, so you have to find a back door.
You sneak into what looks like an old busted fire escape hall. There's an old alarm attached to it, but it's not even enabled, you having prepared to bolt if it had gone off if you were wrong about it. You'd heard one of the staff talking about it needing replacing soon and that they'd disable it until it could be fixed.
Your socked feet are quiet, but slip on the tile floors as you walk out the back door. Looks like the alarm isn't enabled from the inside. You duck out quickly and just run down the road. You keep running. It's dark out still. You didn't even check the time before running off.
But it doesn't matter.
The thoughts in your head are spinning. Everything's just crashing down on you. You're curled up in an alleyway, beside a dumpster.
Fucking useless piece of crap.
You couldn't keep them out?
You're worthless.
You-
It's all just echoing around, piling in your head. Your head is between your knees as you rock back and forth.
It-
It scares the shit out of you when a pair of hands carefully rests on your shoulders.
You let out a little scream, not expecting anyone to have followed you. It's Katrina. You're relieved for a second but quickly tense again.
Shit, you hadn't meant to wake her on the way out.
"Hey, it's okay, it's just me. Im sorry I scared you."
She's hesitant to speak at first, processing what she's going to say, you assume. So you speak first.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you up."
She shakes her head at that.
"Baby, that's not the problem. In fact, I'd rather you have woken me up... baby, what's going on? What's happening in that head of yours? Talk to me, why are we out here?"
"I-." Your voice is shaky, and you have to clear your throat. Your eyes drift to look anywhere but at her.
Her fingers on your chin bring your gaze back though.
"Look at me. What's going on?"
Your words are mumbled softly, like you're trying to force them out, but they just let out almost inaudibly. Thankfully, traffic outside had calmed down in the earlier hours of the morning. So she does hear you when you say it.
"It was just a bad dream, i needed some air."
Her face softens, but she's still sceptical. Thankfully, she doesn't have to prompt you further. Everything just feels so kept up. You let it out slowly, but the more you talk, the more tears that flow out to join the words whispered.
"It's just... God, I feel so stupid. It's not like everyone around me isn't dealing with the same shit."
She's silent as you try and process what to say.
"I- everything's just collapsing in on itself, it feels like... I know it's not the end for me, or for us as a team, but..." There's a little understanding dawning on her face. "Everything in my head has just been crumbling lately. Yesterday, just kind of, I don't know? Completed that? Compiled it? I don't know. It just built and built and built and everything's just being thrown back at me again."
"So that dream...?" She urges gently.
"Was just everything compiling in one go."
"Do you want talk about what happened in it?"
"I-not here, I won't make us have this conversation beside a dumpster."
Katrina laughs a little, letting her hand come up to hold your cheek. "Fuck baby, we could have this conversation on the edge of a cliff and I would still sit and listen. Whereever you wanna be my sweet girl."
You let yourself lean into the warmth of her hand, the cold now having started to seep into you as you're sitting down on the concrete.
You nod quickly. "Let's go. My ass is starting to freeze." She chuckles and pulls you to your feet gently.
Thankfully, Katrina had half the mind to leave the access door unlatched, and you sneak back into the hotel with little to no trouble.
Back in the darkness of the hotel room, you're leant back into her, sitting between her legs on the bed. Her hands run through your hair, gently scratching at your scalp as you replay the events of the nightmare.
"It was so daunting, and it just kept finding its way into my head, and just... god... I love Sam... and I know she would never, but... it just felt so real."
"And it just kept going. It just devolved into... well. My old foster dad... he just..."
Tears started to well up, and you couldn't finish it after that. The words wouldn't come out. At your hesitation, Katrina is quick hush you, pressing her lips to your temple.
"It's okay, baby, you don't have to say it. I'm so sorry you have to deal with that."
"S'not your fault, just my stupid brain."
" Your brain is just trying to help you process the loss, okay? You've suffered so much, and it's okay to be grieving and dealing with it how you need to deal with it."
You lean your head back against her shoulder, letting the tears fall. God, you didn't deserve this woman. She was an amazing mother, a brilliant football player, and an amazing soon to be wife, too. She doesn't wipe the tears away this time, and you let them go.
Instead, she holds you. She lets you cry into her.
She lets you cry into the super early hours of the morning before you finally manage to exhaust yourself into a heavy sleep, tucked between her arms and her whispering sweet nothings, soft praises, and promises of forever with you as you do.
"I know it hurts, baby girl, but we're all here for you, and I've got you, and I'm not gonna let go in a hurry or ever."
You may not be able to tell her everything yet, but she sure as hell would make sure she was there to listen when you do.
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clarisse0o · 4 months ago
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Camp Wiegman - Part 11
Lucy Bronze x Ona Batlle
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Alternative Universe : Military School
Words : 4k
Masterlist
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Sunday, November 1; 7:45 PM - Cafeteria.
I deeply regret Bronze' idea. She convinced me to eat in the cafeteria tonight. I've regained some color, and she decided it was time to reintegrate me. I still have a slight fever, but my nausea has completely disappeared for the day. I might even be able to return to my room tonight and go back to class tomorrow if my night goes smoothly. According to her, it would have been better for me to stay one more night in her room, but Wigeman insisted otherwise. She doesn't want me to miss another day, not being one to grant her students absences easily. Here we are in front of the cafeteria, with my spirits in the gutter. I don't even know what I'm doing here. I have barely eaten all week. Bronze has forced soup on me since Thursday, but I'm getting sick of it. Most of the time, it ended up in the basin a few hours later. She’s lucky I’m no longer as stoned or sore, or I wouldn't have even gotten out of bed. Now that I'm standing in front of the doors, I dread going in. She promised we’d go later to avoid as many people as possible, but it’s Sunday night. Everyone is back from their weekend, so the people who eat at the cafeteria come at various times. Bronze knows these kinds of details perfectly and failed to remind me. I feel all eyes on me as we walk through the doors. I stare at my shoes to hide my horrible face. I had to make the effort to replace my pajamas with simple jogging pants and a casual sweater to look at least somewhat presentable.
"I can't," I say, trying to turn back.
"Hey,  Ona," says Bronze, holding my arm. "You promised you'd try to eat."
"Do you see all these people!?"
"What people?" she asks, looking around the room. "There are barely thirty people. That's hardly ten percent of the capacity."
"Please, Bronze..."
I pout to show her my discomfort. It's not like me to beg. I feel like a weakling. However, I'm willing to do anything to get what I want, even set aside my pride. She crushes my plan by gripping my shoulders.
"Look at me," she orders, and I comply. "I promise they won’t say anything. You need to think about yourself. You need to eat."
I turn my head toward the exit door next to us. It would take just three steps to reach the hall. Bronze interrupts my thought by gripping my chin, forcing me to face her insistent gaze. I know she won’t let this go. I sigh, knowing she's doing this for my own good. I need to regain my strength by eating something substantial. It’s the first day I’ve been able to move around on my own, but I haven’t fully regained my strength. I doubt I can carry a full tray.
"Okay, fine..." I concede.
"Will you be alright?"
"Yeah..." I mumble.
"Come on, go ahead and tell me what you want," she says, pushing me toward the buffet.
"I’m not taking a tray...?"
"One for the both of us will suffice," she says, placing our utensils on it. "It’s not like you’re going to have a full meal."
I bite my lip, thinking she’s probably right. At least that solves my tray problem. I look at the appetizers while she slides the tray along the rail.
"I’m not asking you to take everything, but at least pick a dish and a yogurt. Does that work for you?" she suggests.
I nod, glancing at her. She grabs an appetizer before we move on. What she picked would tempt me if I were hungry. However, that's not the case today. The food they serve us isn’t that bad. It’s not up to the standards of what Sam makes at home, but it’s edible. Contrary to what one might think, we’re rarely served frozen food. The school makes sure to order and cook fresh products. I think that's good. That wasn’t the case at my public high school in Miami. The next step is the main dishes. I give a timid smile to the employees who seem happy to see me, judging by the light in their eyes. I know most of these people from my punishments imposed by Bronze. They were very kind to me, surprisingly.
"Your flu is finally gone?"
I frown, not understanding why the cook is asking me that. I look to my supervisor for answers. She smiles at them and places a reassuring hand on my shoulder.
"She felt better today," she announces. "She didn’t want to get out of bed, but I managed to convince her."
"Good to hear," he replies. "What can I get you?"
I look at what’s available. Once again, the food is tempting, but the appetite isn't there. This makes me question my presence here again.
"Come on,  Ona, make an effort to take something," Bronze encourages.
"Just pasta with sauce."
"No meat?" he asks.
I shake my head no. He smiles and fills a plate, which he hands to Bronze. He prepares a plate for her as well while I continue to move forward. I skip the dairy section and head for dessert. I decide to opt for an apple instead of yogurt. Once we’re done, I’m grateful to Bronze when she suggests we eat in the educators' section. There’s not much difference since only rectangular flower pots separate the two areas, but it’s better than being among the students.
"Come on, sit there," she says, tapping a chair facing away from the cafeteria.
"Thank you," I breathe.
It’s strange to be on this side, but I’m not going to complain. She smiles as she places my plate in front of me. I look at her with a grimace stretching across my face.
"Are you okay?" she asks for the umpteenth time.
"I feel like throwing up."
She chuckles at my disgusted expression. The soups may have gone over my head, but the idea of a full meal is overwhelming.
"Come on, eat a bit. I’m not asking you to finish the plate, just fill your stomach."
"Tsss. If I throw up all night, you’ll be the one cleaning it up, I warn you."
"That’s already what I’ve been doing from the start," she laughs.
I don’t retort, realizing it's true. I sigh and reluctantly bring the fork to my mouth. The first bite feels mushy. It’s like rediscovering food. She smiles with satisfaction and starts her own meal. I rest my heavy head on my palm, watching her.
"Why did the cook mention the flu?" I ask.
"Wiegman passed off your absence as the flu. Only she and the instructors in charge of you know the truth."
"Why?"
"To avoid spreading the news," she shrugs. "She has a reputation to uphold, you know."
Obviously. Interests over truth. It’s not even worth commenting on. I continue to eat my pasta, most of which sticks in my throat. I manage to swallow half before feeling stuffed.
"Do I really have to go back tomorrow?"
"I guess so, yes."
"And if I don’t feel ready?"
"Are you getting depressed?" she smiles.
I lower my head, playing with the rest of my dish. I really don’t want to go back to class tomorrow. I have a bad feeling. I still feel a bit unwell, and it’s too sudden. Bronze places her hand on mine to stop my circular movements in my plate.
"What’s wrong? I’ve known you to be more tenacious than this."
"What if I have a withdrawal episode in the middle of class? It’s not out of the question, you know that, right?"
"Calm down,  Ona. Everything will be fine. Anyway, it's just a possibility. You still need to have a peaceful night."
"Can I make myself throw up right now?"
Bronze laughs softly, removing her hand. I already miss her reassuring warmth. I don’t find it funny. I’ve thought it through and could seriously consider it if it meant staying one more day in my room or hers. I have no desire to go back tomorrow. She seems to understand I’m serious because her smile fades, and she raises an eyebrow, appearing to judge me.
"Are you going to talk to me?"
"There’s nothing to say... I just don’t feel ready," I admit timidly. "I don’t know... Maybe others will figure out the truth by looking at me? I’m sure there are plenty of junkies here."
"It’s not like it’s written on your forehead."
"Who knows?" I half-joke.
"Well," she sighs. "I’ll try to negotiate one more day for you. But Tuesday you’ll go back to class no matter what. OK?"
I’m sure my eyes sparkle with happiness. I didn’t think she’d go so far as to grant me an extra day. If I had known, I would have spoken to her sooner. I nod enthusiastically, creating a mischievous smile on her face that doesn’t bode well.
"However, it’s not without condition."
I groan in frustration, letting my head slide from my palm. Damn, it was too good to be true! I sit up to look at her with puppy eyes.
"No need to look at me like that."
"What’s the price?"
"You need to regain your strength, so I want you to finish your plate and eat your apple," she orders in a more serious tone. "If you succeed, I’ll speak to Wiegman. If not, I won’t bother. Deal?"
"Deal," I say, already regretting it.
"Perfect," she smiles. "I’ll let you eat and come back to get you. In the meantime, I need to check on others."
I nod, watching her leave with her tray. She also ate less than usual. I think she’s staying on the lookout. I prefer it that way. Once she disappears, I turn around to see if anyone noticed me. I recognize one of my friends, who seems absorbed in her conversation. I wonder what excuse Bronze used to explain my absence to them. I haven’t spoken to them since last Sunday. I’ll have to be honest with them one day. I eat my pasta, though I doubt I'll manage to finish the apple.
"I remembered Friday night. You know, when you ended up just as soaked as I did."
"Is this how you thank me for helping you?"
I giggle at her clearly exaggerated offended look. She kicks my shin under the table, immediately calming me down without erasing my smile.
"Admit it was funny looking back on it."
"How can you remember that? You were completely out of it."
"I have no idea, but it's worth remembering, I laugh even harder."
This time she laughs with me, shaking her head.
"Stop making fun of me. I have plenty of dirt on you from this past week too."
"Go ahead."
"Not now. I'll save it for when I'm in a tough spot."
"Of course, I roll my eyes."
I hand her another piece of apple, which she accepts without protest. Finally done! She stacks our plates on her tray.
"Let's go, I still need to see Wiegman because of you."
"Sorry, but I really don't want to go back to class tomorrow."
"This is the last favor I'm doing for you. Make sure to get back to your life quietly starting Tuesday and catch up on all your missed classes."
"You're really depressing when you want to be."
"I know."
She smiles proudly. We're the last ones in the room with the staff cleaning the kitchen. I help Bronze clear the tray, then we leave the dining hall to return to her room. She drops me off and immediately heads to administration. I take advantage of being alone to take a shower and put on my pajamas. A slight headache returns when I lie down in bed. I sigh, thinking it can't be more unbearable than what I've been through this week. I turn off the light and try to find sleep. Just as I'm about to succeed, Bronze reappears in the room. Her first instinct is to turn on the light, making me groan into my pillow.
"What's wrong with you? Why were you in the dark?"
"Because I maybe wanted to sleep?"
"At nine p.m.?" she chuckles.
"Shhh, I groan. Turn off the light!"
I pull the blanket over my head to block the light that's worsening my headache. She turns it off a second later and crouches beside me. The back of her hand rests on my forehead, making me sigh.
"No, I don't have a fever. I just want to sleep."
"Are you sure you're okay?"
"Yes, Bronze."
"Well, I'm going to shower then. Sleep well."
I turn my back to her and pull the blanket over again. I hear her sigh before a door slams. I lower the blanket to get some air. She turned off the main light but left my bedside lamp on. I hear the shower running in the next room. I can't fall back asleep. I toss and turn, but it's useless. Bronze comes out of the bathroom before I manage to fall asleep. She ignores me and heads to her bed behind me. I wait a bit before rolling over. I'm surprised to see her on a computer. In a week, I've never seen her on one. She usually prefers books. I even thought she didn't have one since I didn't find any when I turned her room upside down a few weeks ago. She must have brought it from home. I smile when I notice glasses on the end of her nose. It's the first time I've seen her wearing them. It's weird seeing her with them, but they suit her. She turns her head towards me after a moment of silence.
"I thought you wanted to sleep?"
"I can't anymore..."
"Sorry, I thought you were joking. Are you feeling unwell?"
"No, just tired and a bit of a headache."
"Go back to sleep then."
"Easier said than done. And with the light and all..."
"Do you want me to turn it off?"
I shake my head. The desire to sleep has passed since she returned. She stares at me without speaking.
"Has anyone ever told you that glasses suit you?"
"Yes," she chuckles." But thanks for the compliment. I was going to watch my series. Want to join?" she offers.
"Which one?"
"Game of Thrones."
"Oh, yeah," I say enthusiastically." What episode are you on?"
"I just started. I'm mid-season one", she says, sitting up.
The idea is appealing; I love this series! I lean against the wall, pulling the blanket up. She swings her legs out of bed, keeping her laptop on her knees. The Apple logo dazzles my eyes as she types. When she finishes, she places it on a chair she moves closer so we can both see the screen. She presses play and positions herself like me in her bed. As for me, I finally lie down, noticing I can see the screen from this position too.
"Bronze?" I ask after a while.
"Hmm?"
"So what did Wiegman say?"
"That it's okay, but it's the last day she'll give you. As I suspected, you won't be able to get out of it on Tuesday."
"How did you persuade her?"
"Doesn't matter."
"What does that mean?"
"Nothing," she chuckles. "The how is just administrative, it's my job. The important thing is the answer, right?"
"Hmm..."
Her answer hurts. "It's just administrative." "It's my job." So I'm nothing more than a job to her? I thought she did it because she understood me. I turn my head when I feel her gaze on me. A silly smile spreads across her lips.
"What now?"
"Nothing..."
"I can feel you thinking from here, and I'm not putting up with it through the whole episode."
I ignore her, focusing on the screen. Now I feel foolish for thinking she might care about me. She sighs and pauses the episode. She keeps staring at me, but my eyes stay fixed on the screen. I don't want to give her the satisfaction or she'll win.
"What do you want to know?"
"Nothing, it's fine."
"You're so stubborn when you want to be. Too bad for you."
I bite my lip. Damn it. My curiosity gets the better of me. I speak just before she presses play.
"Why don't you want to tell me?"
She looks up at me, keeping a neutral expression. I feel stupid. I always seem to ruin good moments.
"Because there's nothing to say. You shouldn't worry about the how. That's my problem, but if you must know, I said you still felt unwell and weren't ready. Nothing more, nothing less. Can I resume now?"
I think I made her angry. I hide the blush forming on my cheeks by rubbing my head against the pillow.
"No need to get mad. You could have told me right away."
"No, it's none of your business. The liaison with Wiegman is my job. You really need to learn to trust me."
"It's not about that."
"Yes, it is, and you know it as well as I do."
I sigh, lowering my head. Yeah, she's probably right, even if we're not thinking about the same thing right now. Now that I know she's doing this just as part of her job, I'm afraid she'll tell Wiegman everything I confided in her. I haven't opened up like this in a long time, and I don't know how I'll take it if she repeats it. Our relationship has evolved a lot in a week, but not in the way I thought.
"Trust goes both ways... I tell you things, unlike you."
"I'm not your friend, Ona. I'm your instructor, even your supervisor. I'm not supposed to bond with you beyond this relationship. I'm not going to tell you about my life. My role is to guide and help you. The liaison with Wiegman is part of that."
"You ruin everything."
"Why? "she frowns.
"I really thought you liked me."
"I do. You're my student."
She doesn't understand. For once, it's not me. I cross my arms and sink into my bed. She sighs deeply.
"What now?"
"Nothing."
"Yes. Spill it now that we're here."
"I opened up to you. I confided in you and even let you shower me. God knows how hard it was for me to let you do that! A simple supervisor wouldn't have done that! You even gave me a birthday present. I thought you liked me more than any other student for doing all that."
"You're not just any student, you're my student."
"Great, I say sarcastically."
"Stop sulking. I've always acted professionally. You knew what to expect in the evolution of our relationship. Sorry if you felt differently."
"Yes, you're right. I misinterpreted things."
She sighs, watching me. She surprises me by getting up and sitting on my bed. I instinctively pull back and turn my head away.
"Stop acting like a child, Ona."
She forces me to look at her by holding my chin. Her green eyes pierce through me.
"Let go of me!"
I try to pull away, but she releases my chin to hold my head. I can't escape her now. I could close my eyes, but I'd look even more ridiculous than I already do.
"Ona, I really like you. You're different, and that makes you special. Your case intrigues me, and it makes me want to invest more in you than the other students to help you change. However, it won't change our status. I'll never offer you friendship or anything like that. Can you understand that?"
"Yeah," I grumble." At least I won't be fooled twice."
"Don't take it that way."
"Yes, the message is clear."
"This shouldn't change anything between us, she says, making me laugh bitterly."
"It's not for you to decide."
"Ona..." she sighs.
"I got fooled by imagining things, but it won't happen again."
"I don't want you to become that insufferable student again just because of a misunderstanding."
I don't respond. There's nothing more to say on my end. She releases my head, sighing once more. She admits defeat and goes back to her bed. She resumes the series, which I keep my eyes on, trying to ignore her gaze on me. I thought we had moved past professionalism. Sure, I don't expect a great friendship, but at least a slightly more friendly relationship instead of sticking to statuses. It seems I was just daydreaming. When I leave here, she'll go back to being the unpleasant commander.
"I see the defiant girl you were in the first days."
"She never left. Looks like I wasn't the only one imagining things."
"Don't lie to yourself, she scolds. You're far from the girl who came here a month ago, and you know it."
"Hmm."
"Fine, as you wish."
She focuses on the series, creating a deathly silence. I can't even follow the episode anymore. The conversation keeps spinning in my head. Will she change when we go back to our normal lives? Hard to say, but it's scary. She's taken care of me so much since the beginning. I'm almost glad she was assigned to my case. The episode ends. Fortunately, I've seen it before because I haven't followed it since our exchange. I'm barely staying awake, but I hold on. I don't want to sleep being on bad terms with her. Deep down, I know she won't change her behavior.
"Bronze...?" I call her timidly.
"Hmm?"
"I'm sorry. I don't know why I got upset. I imagined things... I don't know, I sigh. I knew what to expect, and I should never have said what I said."
"I know, Ona. Rest now, I can see you're forcing yourself to stay up until the end."
"Hmm... Good night, Bronze."
"Good night."
My heart is much lighter now. Hopefully, I'm not wrong. I take a deep breath before letting my eyelids close on their own. I feel like I'll sleep well tonight for the first time in a long while.
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cruyuu · 24 days ago
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hii! are there any really good (and preferably long) sukuita fics that you like? love ur analyses btw and thank you ❤️
Hii anon! Sorry for a very, very late answer. I've been busy as hell and just chose to put this ask in the drafts and then forgot about writing out my answer.
I've already replied to one similar ask some time ago but since you're asking for my opinion and for them to be long, the list that I have in my head with my colorful commentary is under the cut. Hopefully, you'll find some of them as interesting as I did.
The Tale of the Peach Blossom Prince by ChumbalieWumbus
First fic I ever read for sukuita. Let's just say it blew me away with its attention to detail and worldbuilding. This fic isn't strictly just sukuita though, it's rather a sukumeji? (there's a polyamorous relationship between Sukuna, Uraume and Yuuji) fic. It's understandable to skip this if you're looking for strictly sukuita fics but I do suggest you give this a try since it's rather long and quite well done. As a Yuuji fan, I adore it personally. This fic also has some gorgeous fanart too! (Which I will unfortunately not link because it's featured at the end of the story and it will spoil major things regarding it). Now, my comments aside, short summary is: The Culling Games are happening. Yuuji fights someone (not Sukuna btw) and ends up traveling back in time to the Heian period. Chaos ensues.
All in all, I had a blast reading it and I recommend it heavily.
Ten Years and a Day series by EvilPeaches
This isn't really a chaptered fic but is a series of two fics sitting at 21k words so ofc I'll feature it here. It's the written out what if Sukuna wins? scenario where Yuuji remains alive which is a type of fic I had been hunting for at the beginning when I grew to love these two and this checked off all the boxes for me. It was practically wish fulfillment. Genuinely beautiful and harrowing and quite in character too which is a must for me.
I am a sucker for canon (and canon divergence) fics but if that's not what you're looking for then I highly recommend checking out No Eviction Notice by the same author too, which is a long AU and heavy on the plot (angsty as hell too, so beware).
Istrouma by trashygivency
An ongoing work but trust me it is so worth it. Like I said, I'm a sucker for canon and this fic delivers, especially because its set during the Culling Games arc, where the sukuita divorce is in place. Well, things take a turn and Sukuna and Yuuji magically reunite and walk through memories together. One thing leads to another and trust me, it's wild. It's a reincarnation AU and oh my god they were roommates past lovers with good characterization and a plot which centers on their forgotten then remembered past. My commentary can't do this fic justice so please check it out!
Blood & Snow by megumiblues
A breath of fresh air amidst the tragically-depraved (is that a word? lol) works I had been (and usually am) consuming of these two. If you're not that into tragedy, don't want them to ruin each other and tear at each other or don't want their love and union to have catastrophic or deadly consequences, this is your fic. It's still them in all their glory (yknow hate, Sukuna being a bastard, etc.) but surprisingly soft and beautiful. All I'm going to say is that the author did a good job at this AU, both with the plot and Sukuna and Yuuji's characterization. It actually made me shed a tear too so that's a big, big thumbs up for me.
Speaking of long-written soft sukuita...
I'm Sick Of You by Cogni_Diss
also makes the list! It's five chapters long and is also quite tame. It's funny, a bit sad but also quite beautiful. I adore this author and their take on these two idiots so make sure to check out their other works as well. As for the summary: This is a canon divergence fic and with each finger Yuuji swallows, Sukuna grows stronger but here swallowing something ancient has consequences unlike in canon. It's tooth-rotting fluff (with some angst, nothing severe tho) and these two terribly in-canon. Check! it! out! if you want a remedy to the heavy and hard ride these two can be.
Ok, now back to the dark side.
Collision by Serkerde
A genuinely, unfortunately ongoing but extremely interesting A/B/O AU fic where Sukuna is, put plainly, himself (a dick) and an Alpha. Slowest of burns with sukuita is a weird idea in an AU where everything seems to be driven by instinct. Or is that the case? Yuuji (and the modern world) would disagree. Basically: you have an Alpha who is one of a kind (called a Prime) and Yuuji who belongs to the dwindling numbers of Omega. Not your average ones ofc. A very heavy plot ensues with them slowly, slowly, veeery slowly falling for each other. The author has their own twist on the A/B/O Universe which is why this fic is an interesting recipe from the start. Throw in these two and you already have a divine meal cooking.
Also highly recommend checking out Should Immortality Be So Mortal and In Our Flesh series by the same author! I hold SIBSM and IOF series close to my chest because I adore how this author writes these two. <3
The Shape Of Our Souls by O_ToJoy
Another breathtaking (also ongoing fml but don't let that stop you), heavy on the plot with an interesting premise A/B/O AU story. It deals with the future and follows a non-linear narrative. Yuuji is an Omega who has kids with Alpha Sukuna and guess what? The merger happens in this fic. Trust me this fic is gorgeous and a blast. Everything is handled incredibly and passionately and I can't put into words how obsessed I was with this fic when I first found it (which was a couple of months ago). I still love it and have it in my 'read for later' for updates. The characterization (of all, not just Sukuna and Yuuji), the world-building, the plot... It's incredible truly.
Apotheosis series by cafedelmar
I love authors who vibe and just write, trying to unwind and explain the unexplainable and unattainable. Taking characters into their own hands and just going with the flow. Sukuna is a God in this series, the fics follow a non-linear narrative and are slightly AU-ish. It's all vibes basically but it's brilliantly written, heavily centered around Sukuna being something larger than what we've seen of him in canon. I love love love authors who can put the unexplainable into very clear-cut explainable and this author does it extremely well. Yuuji is Sukuna's vessel and this series is riding the Dark!Yuuji vibe (which is also one of my fav ideas) because sure, power is addicting itself and having a God entertain an idea of giving it to a weak-in-comparison Yuuji (Yuuji the key point here) is a whole another addicting thing in itself. All in all, heavy Season 1 vibes and gorgeously written.
And since I'm talking about S1 vibes...
Nuns with Guns by surverycorpsjean
is also a recommended read for those who find the one body/two souls situation so very interesting. This one is hauntingly beautiful and extremely well-written. It's not a chaptered fic but it is nearly 20k words long so it made it on the list. I was on a hunt for fics which explored this situation down to its ugly, twisted, terrifyingly beautiful core (because canon gave us nothing :( ) and this one blew me away, especially with it's characterization. Definitely check this one out if you're stuck on S1 sukuita and their weird ass hatred which could translate into codependency and not death because why would they be normal about each other lol. That's boring.
vinegar heart by vavavavoom
Yuuji, cursed from birth, is made for Sukuna, yet unlike in canon, acceptance is the path he is forced to walk on here, until he grows to love it and hate it because this is an AU! Selfishness, cruelty, codependency and sukuita with Yuuji who is suffering (it is what it is style) and Sukuna who's obsessed with him (basically canon lol). What more could you ask for? Joking aside, this fic takes place in an AU and has God Sukuna who... I shouldn't spoil it. Let's just say that Sukuna isn't the same Sukuna we see in canon. He's much more accepting of Yuuji here, even though he mocks him and belittles him and everything. I mean the tag "Possessive Behavior" is right there so... yeah. The reason why I held my hand from writing out the spoiler is bc 1) it'll ruin your experience and 2) it adds an interesting undertone to the story and basically makes you go "Ohhhh". Check it out!
not the temple, but the lamb slit up inside by obscyr
Interesting as hell and definitely one of the extremes ones. Beautifully written as well. I started it like two months ago but then dropped it because I was busy and it had been sitting in my notes app for quite some time until I caught up to it recently. As you may have noticed, I am down bad for codependency, but I am also down bad for seeing how bad things could get. Sukuita, in all its glory, is problematic as hell, but if you throw them into an Modern AU, make Sukuna a cannibalist + suspected? serial killer and have Yuuji as his nephew who's lowkey growing obsessed with his mystery and is also a mystery himself- I'm going to shut up now because I will spoil the plot- you get this hell. It has 9 chapters, and the plot moves a bit slow but if you're intrigued, then definitely give it a read and ofc, if you are overwhelmed with this fic or just don't like it, feel free to skip.
Aconitum by AttackRabbit
Another ongoing fic which I recently got addicted to. Again, it's ABO AU but not overtly typical one, and heavy on the plot and world-building. Can you imagine that the author had actually invented a language for Sukuna? Yes! It's that amazing. In this fic, Yuuji is a war veteran who works as an apothecary and he stumbles onto injured Sukuna. Brilliant characterization, a unique plot and if you don't read and translate Sukuna's sentences, he's basically half-a-mystery. Much love to this fic because it is incredible!
And that's for the list! A big shout-out goes to Character Assassination by MayTheSixth which I also started reading a couple of days ago, but because it's quite a long work, I never got around to finishing it. It's also an ongoing one, but I'm loving it so far so you can check that out too!
And there you have it anon. Happy reading and have a wonderful day or night!
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forever-rogue · 2 years ago
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Hi Bee! I've been a long time reader and fan of your blog! The way you write for Eddie is insane 😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️ I love it 🥹 if you feel comfortable, could you please write something for fem!reader x Eddie where she has a history of being bullied (physically & verbally) and one day they could be arguing or something and Eddie is on edge and raises his voice and moves too quickly and she flinches (or maybe has a panic attack or something) I would really appreciate this ❤️🥺 comfort and fluff at the end because I need that rn ❤️
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AN | Okay, but this is a little angsty but mostly soft 🥺🥰
Warnings | Language, mentions of past verbal abuse 
Pairing | Eddie x Fem!Reader
Word Count | 2.3k
Masterlist | Main, Eddie 
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
It had been a long week. Weeks, really. And you felt like you and Eddie were like ships passing in the night more than anything else. You were busy with college classes and your part time job, and he was busy working at the shop. He’d been working a lot lately, even more than he normally did, but you hadn’t questioned it. You knew that you didn’t bring in a lot of money only working part time while you finished your degree, but it would be worth it in the end. 
But Eddie, good, kind hearted, wonderful man that he was, insisted that you it was okay. He wanted you to be able to focus on your studies, rather than have to worry about working. He was the main provider for your little family of two, and while it was a lot of pressure, he wouldn’t have changed a thing. In fact, one of the reasons he’d been working even longer hours and helping a few customers on the side, was so he could save up to buy you an engagement ring. You always insisted that you didn’t need anything fancy, but Eddie wanted to do this right, he wanted to do all the things with you, including proposing with a pretty ring.
Right now though, you were desperately wanting to spend some time with him, so you went ahead and planned a little date night for the two of you. You’d gotten a few very generous tips at the cafe lately and stashed them away in the rainy day fund; and now it was time to use them. You wanted a nice night out for both of you. 
“Eddie Spaghetti,” you were grinning from ear to ear as you walked into your shared apartment. You’d just gotten out of class and he should have been home a few minutes before you. He didn’t respond to your excited call for him and you wondered if he was home yet, “babe?”
You walked into the bedroom and found him sitting at the edge of the bed, boots off and a fresh change of clothes. He was breathing deeply, eyes closed and leaned back on his hands. Poor thing looked tired, and you knew he deserved the rest. 
“Babe-”
“I heard you,” he said, not altogether rudely or kindly either, “hi sweetheart.”
“Hello my love,” you kneeled at his feet, reaching for his hand to take in yours, “I missed you today! I’ve been missing you a lot lately.”
“I’ve missed you too,” he responded with a gentle squeeze of your hand, looking into your eyes for a split second. You could see the exhaustion in them and it made your heart constrict.
“Listen, I set a little bit of money aside for us and I thought we could go out tonight,” you were grinning, but there was an unreadable expression on his features, “get dinner and maybe catch a movie?”
“Not tonight, sweetheart.”
“I just think it would be nice to have a night out to ourselves-”
“I can’t tonight,” he repeated as you pouted at him, “I’m sorry - maybe this weekend, okay?”
“But Eddie-”
“Please!” he snapped suddenly, dropping your hand as he gave you a sharp look. You’d never heard him raise his voice before…especially not at you. The only time you really heard him get loud was when he was in the thrill of the moment during a new campaign, “I’m exhausted and I have to go back to work tonight.”
“I don’t think you should-”
“Really?” his eyes narrowed and you gulped nervously, “then who is going to pay for everything, huh?”
“Eddie,” you stepped back, your heart racing as you felt the stinging of tears in the back of your eyes, “I-I-”
“Not all of us have the luxury of going to school and working a few hours here and there at a coffee shop!” you’d never heard him this mad before, not in over three years of dating, and it frightened you. You didn’t like this Eddie and wanted your Eddie back. You flinched away from him, trying to hide how scared you were.
“I just thought you could use a break,” your voice sounded so small and hurt that it broke Eddie’s heart. He shouldn’t have snapped at you, shouldn’t have taken his momentary anger (which was not even at you) out on you, “you’ve been working so hard. I-I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything.”
“Sweetheart,” he tried to reach for you but you shook your head and pulled away to where he couldn’t reach you, “honey - I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell. Will you come here, please?”
“No,” you shook your head and clambered to your feet before scampering towards the door, “please just don’t.”
“Angel,” he got up and tried to walk over to you but you ducked in the hallway, “what’s wrong?”
“I-I’m going to go,” you stammered nervously, almost running into the living room to grab your bookbag. Eddie followed you slowly, trying to keep a bit of distance that you obviously needed, “I-I’ll see you later.”
You were gone and out the door before he could say anything else, heading to your care. You weren’t sure exactly what to do, but you just needed some space. You’d never had a single moment with him like that before and it felt terrible. This wasn’t Eddie, and you knew that he wasn’t going to turn into some monster, but the moment had settled harshly in your bones. 
Eddie’s eyes welled up with tears as he stared at the door. He hated the look on your face; he hated himself more for snapping at you. He’d just been so tired and run down, and it had all come to a head. Unfortunately, it was you that was caught in the crossfire; his love, his princess, his angel. The last person he ever wanted to hurt. And he’d just gone and done that.
“Fuck,” he sighed at himself, closing his eyes and letting out a long breath. He wanted to come after you, figuring you’d more than likely have gone to Steve and Robin’s place. But, more than anything, he wanted you to be comfortable, so he opted to give you space instead. 
 ─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
By the time you got home, Eddie was already in bed. But he wasn’t sleeping, instead he was staring at the ceiling, unable to calm his worried mind down. He heard the front door open and close, followed by your soft tread, but remained still and silent. He noticed the hesitation in your tread after he heard your bag settle on the floor, followed by your shoes. He hated the idea that he was the reason for your quiet shyness. 
You paused outside the bedroom door, noticing that it was still partly open, almost like a sign of apology. You paused with your hand on the knob before slowly pushing it open and letting yourself in. There was a soft glow from the bedside table where the small lamp was still on. It illuminated his body, but you knew immediately that he was still awake.
“E-Eddie?” you whispered softly, padded over to your side of the bed, cautiously sitting down. Your boyfriend rolled over so he was facing you, blinking softly but not yet saying anything so he wouldn’t push you further. You met his eyes and offered him a small little half smile. He visibly relaxed when he saw that you weren’t shying away, “I know it’s late, but can we talk?”
“Yeah - y-yes,” he sat up and leaned against the headboard, lightly patting the space next to him. You didn’t even bother to take off your clothes before crawling into your side of the bed, sitting cross legged next to him, “I…first of all, I want to say how sorry I am. I should never have talked to you like that. I know you probably don’t believe me right now and I don’t expect you to, but I will never talk to you like that again. I swear it.”
“I know,” you nodded softly, playing with a loose thread hanging from the sleeve of your sweater, “I know you won’t, Eddie. I know that a one time thing isn’t going to change our entire relationship.” 
“Yeah?”
“Of course,” you raised a tentative hand before reaching over and touching his cheek, brushing your thumb over the apple of his cheek. He leaned into your touch, eyes fluttered closed at the feel of your soft palm on his skin, “I think I owe you an explanation too.”
“Sweetheart,” he wrapped his fingers around your wrist and brought your hand to his lips, pressing a soft kiss to your knuckles, “I am tired, and I’ve been tired and I know you have been too. And it’s not because you don’t work hard - I know you do. I know it’s not just going to school full time and working part time. And it’s nothing I hold against you, because that’s what we agreed to, and let’s be honest, school ain’t for me.”
“Eddie, you’ve been working so much,” you whispered, “and I don’t want you to run yourself into the ground. We’ll be okay if you cut back your hours, especially the extra ones. I can always pick a few more hours on the weekends…but we’ll figure it out.”
“I…” he swallowed thickly, taking a moment to collect his thoughts before continuing, “I know I can cut back and we’d be okay….I took the extra shifts and hours because I was using them to save some extra money.”
“Oh,” your brows furrowed in surprise; you spotted the dark pink flush in his cheeks, “whatever for?”
“I was saving up so I could buy you a ring,” he confessed, looking like a shy boy rather than a grown man. Your eyes widened in surprise and you couldn’t prevent the small gasp that escaped your lips. A wave of emotion caused your eyes to prickle with tears, “I know you said you didn’t need an engagement ring or a big proposal or any of that, but baby, I want to do this. I want to do it right, and get you that ring.”
“Oh Eddie,” a few tears had prickled up and rolled down your cheeks, which he tenderly wiped away, “I had no clue…I…I love you so much.”
“I love you,” he promised, “I hope you’re not mad…”
“Of course I’m not mad,” you beamed at him, “I think you’re a stubborn man that won’t change his mind, huh?”
“I won’t,” he agreed, causing you to giggle at him, “I’m gonna cut back my hours, I swear. But I’m also going to get you that ring, yeah?”
“Okay,” you didn’t need or want fancy material things like shiny rings, but damn. You weren’t about to say no to Eddie. You knew now that he’d spoken his piece, it was your turn to speak yours, “I, ugh, also want to apologize for how I reacted earlier. I, umm, growing up kinda sucked, you know? Well, I know you know. I never really gave you the full details, ‘cause it never felt necessary. But in school I was bullied a lot, especially when I was young because of being different. Home wasn’t much better; my mom, she…liked my older brother and sister a lot but with me it was different. For whatever reason, she hated me and my life a living hell half the time. She used to call me names, tell me I was stupid and unlovable, and would never get anywhere in life.”
“Sweetheart…”
“She liked to yell, a lot, almost like it was her form of a drug,” you shrugged, “I’m sure that’s why I don’t like any sort of yelling nowadays. I never really left like I fit in anywhere. Not until I met you….you and the rest of the gang.”
“I…I’m sorry,” was all he managed to choke out as he settled his hand on your neck, his thumb rubbing soothing circles into your skin, “I had no clue…I-I’m sorry you had to go through that.”
“We all go through our own things,” you put your hand on top of his, giving it a gentle squeeze, “I should have told you sooner…but I want you to know that you are the best thing that has happened to me. I love you very much, Eddie.”
“I love you too, sweetheart,” he leaned in and pressed a soft barely there kiss to your lips, “will you forgive me? I know it’s a lot to ask for.”
“There’s nothing to forgive,” you leaned your cheek against his, breathing in slowly, “we both…it’s not that we made mistakes, it’s just that….we just didn’t quite sync up today. And that’s okay, because we’ll learn and it won’t happen again.”
“It won’t,” his eyes were soft and bambi-like, making your heart melt. You loved this man beyond measure, and you knew he left the same, “how about we use some of that extra money we’ve stashed away and go away this weekend, huh? Just the two of us, no cares in the world.”
“I’d like that,” the smile on your face was breathtaking and electric and Eddie was positive he’d just fallen a little more in love, “let’s do it.”
“Let’s do it,” he agreed softly, “I love you so much, sweetheart.”
“I love you too, Eddie.”
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octuscle · 1 year ago
Text
Truck Stop
Christian had never had to go to the bathroom so urgently in his entire life. His bladder almost burst. He chased his Porsche at more than 220 Km/h over the highway. Finally the sign for the exit to the service area. That's when he saw the restroom, right across the street was a parking lot. Okay, it was a truck parking lot, but he couldn't take that into consideration anymore. Running to the restroom, he was already unbuckling the belt and zipper of his suit pants. There were already three men standing at the urinals. Quite hulking, as far as he could tell out of the corner of his eye. Fortunately, one stall was free. He dropped his pants and pissed like a bull. Then he heard a loud fart. Followed by a booming deep laugh. Immediately followed by another fart. My God, what a stench that was. Christian had to get out of here. He pulled up his pants and fastened his belt while turning around. And collided with one of the behemoths standing right behind him in the toilet stall. "Could it be you took my parking spot, fella?" the guy asked. Dirty jeans, dirty wife beater, hairy chest and arms. To see the face, Christian had to crane his head back. A man in his mid-40s with a bald head and unkempt beard. Christian felt uncomfortable. Also because he had pulled up his pants too quickly, a last stream of piss ran down his pant leg. "Payback's a must, lad," the colossus grunted and turned around. Christian was about to push past him when the man let out a huge fart. Christian almost felt sick. The man stepped aside. Christian noticed that the room was filled with six or seven men. Boots, dirty jeans or hi-viz pants, their impressive upper bodies in T-shirts or undershirts. One of the truckers dropped his pants and someone pushed Christian's face into the hairy crack. He held his breath, but just as he came up for air, another fart blew in his face. Christian's eyes went black. When he regained consciousness, he was lying alone on the floor of the toilet. He stood up and realized that he had been lying in a puddle of urine. The whole floor was dirty and stank. He could throw away his suit. But now he had to get out.
In the fresh air, he took a deep breath. Boy, why did he have such a tremendous hunger. Even if he was ashamed of his dirty and smelly clothes, he had to eat something. Urgently. He walked toward the rest area. In the entrance area, he noticed that it was actually a store with clothing. Okay, more like work clothes, of course, but he couldn't go around people like that. He grabbed some work boots, a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. There was no changing room, so he paid and undressed behind the clothing rack. He didn't wonder about the dirty white socks. And about the urine-stained grayed jockstrap. He put on his pants and boots. And then the undershirt. He had foolishly not been able to see that this was not a T-shirt in the package. But anything was better than his filthy clothes, which he simply stuffed into a trash can.
It was late and the selection in the self-service restaurant was slim. Since there was nothing else, he went for the chili con carne. At least the portion was huge. Christian set his tray down on an empty table. He was the only guest for the most part. The chili wasn't bad at all and Christian gobbled it down small. There one of the guys from the restroom sat down to him. And asked if he could have taken a joke. Sure, point of honor, said Chris and stretched out his hand. The two of them slapped hands. A second fella joined them and put three bottles of beer on the table. They toasted. Little by little, the round increased. After the second beer, Chris had to burp like he had never done before in his life. The round laughed bawling. And one after the other did the same. And then Chris farted so loudly that the few other guests and the employees turned around. Again the round laughed up.
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"Lads, I've got to take a shit, then I'm off to my bunk," Chris said goodbye to his buddies. When he was out of the restroom, he wiped his paws on his dirty jeans and lit one last cigarette. He still had a few miles to go in his truck tomorrow, so it was time to hit the sack.
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