#so I've been away from tumblr like for 3 days idk i was feeling really bad these day
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now this.......... this is what i mean when i want more fun question thingies...... holy fuck im gonna have a field day with this
kinda shitty but life goes on
nawwwww im not ready for a face reveal on here yet lol
absolutely every single day of my life
hm... good question... lemme ask my mom and i'll get back to you
18 woohooo adulthood
i don't usually get asked questions abt my age let alone get mistaken for any ages
im an aquarius and i think??? i suit it?? idk that's what my parents say at least
had a little at home thingy, went to one of my fav places with my bff it was pretty fun
i don't know
black rn
yeah my natural hair color is brown but i like to change it a lot
brown
i'd change the color only if i could make them pink
yeah im blind
well i certainly have one. and it does the jobs it needs to. that is for sure.
we're not gonna get into that this early in the morning
or that this is boring
i have one but im looking to get more asap
i have 6 but again im always looking to get more
right
bi
no but if i could i would
yeah
i have a kitty cat and a doggy dog
i don't have like a set job, i just do occasional freelancey shit
i have a fic in the works as per usual
tell me this question list is from the pro-ana days of tumblr without telling me it was from the pro-ana days of tumblr lol
massive two shits, you ess ay
im very empathetic and a good listener (or at least i try to be, that's just what i've been told)
im a good writer
a lot of things
well it's not really something you're born with but i wish drawing came easier to me, im not really good at it
i feel like one a lot of the time but i don't really know
i try to be, but i get really bitchy when people aren't nice back. i try to keep that to myself tho
i do not know my personality well enough
yeah, im really good at being friends with shitty people apparently!!!
my ideal bed is one with a frame because im tired of my mattress pulling away from the wall and then slamming my head into the wall when i try to lay down <3
no but im feeling quite cranky right now
yeah im like 5 years old lol
mark hoffman
BORING next
i don't even know anymore
i have none
again i have like zero aspirations in the career world, i never want to get a job. crossing my fingers i win the lottery or something
not at fucking all
all the time. i dwell on every interaction i have and i play them back almost obsessively.
yeah, i still kinda do
too lazy
yeah
no but i absolutely need one
i have seasonal allergies n then a couple medicines
i fractured my wrist once
yeah i almost slipped down a waterfall. that would've sucked
nerp
i actually can't think of anythint
i used to be a cheerleader, i went to circus camp (for one day), and uhm........ i got nothing
this is literally the last question restated
literally everythint im a fuckint freak
boring
yeah
like, three
what the fuck
yolo
no
sleep
pink
favorite band is ghost, favorite singer is 12ve my goat 🙏🙏🙏
SAW
the incorrigible children of ashton place, ghost girl, uhmmm OH a series of unfortunate events
yolo bc...... yolo
scoop
most words with the "oy" sound
sushi 🤤🤤🤤
chocolate chip cookie dough
kitty cats meow meow meow
does my answer to the last question answer this one too
super soft, kinda fluffy, silky blankets
orchids
scent as in perfume?? i have this one purple juicy perfume i really like. my favorite not-perfume scent is cigarettes. n then on the opposite sex....... idk man i like when guys smell kinda musky
fall
i don't know
why do i have to list 4 things UGHHHHHH
i don't know mythological creatures well enough to cast myself as any
smiling friends
walmart
naw
why do i have to list so many thints this is so boring
my dad
i have two brothers
no
it's......... interesting
NOOOOO
no
no
i wish
in a different house
idk, i'd want all the rooms to have like a different vibe but i wouldn't want anything to be too white or minimalist or modern.
nyc or something
not home
no
yeah
i don't have a preference
my best friend
yes
all of them are pretty loyal
yes
kill myself 💀💀
i don't know?????
yes
no i don't wanna
i don't remember
my first real bf
yeah
no but i am so open to it dilfs hmu
guh i kinda have a preference towards men
?? idk how to answer this question
never experienced but im sure some people have so who am i to say
hm....,... kinda
i don't really have one
tbh if ur like. adam stanheight or jesse pinkman. then. yeah. that works :3
i don't actually know
kinda?? i wouldn't say someone im not attracted to, that'd be shitty. but looks aren't everything. basically if you're cute and have a good personality, YIPPEE!!!!
i don't even know what this means
i've made it very very clear that im more than open to dating a guy who's like double my age. i do not care LMAO
maybe??
naur
i don't know 😭
n/a
n/a
"oh ok my bad"
yesterday
no
no
yes
yes
no
yes
no
yes oh my god these questions are so gay
i think so
yes
yes
1) stoo asking boring yes or no questions OK WOOOOOO
stupid dumb idiot stoners who are the epitome of the kinda trashy loser guys in 2000s movies. fuck they're my favorite
uhmmmmm not much
i don't know
boring
boring
boring
boring
yes with mark hoffman
yes with mark hoffman
that he is mark hoffman
yes obviously what
probably jill tuck and also amanda young
easily
EASILY
i think so maybe
no
not having any
yes
i don't know
if ur actively trying to emotionally or physically get with someone - whether it's over text or through like a post or a dating app - that's cheating. idc if ur attracted to other people, idc if u watch porn, idc abt most things, but if we're dating and you're seeking out someone else, you suck
no
not really but im a grudge holder so
no. god no. ew.
i don't wanna get into that rn
or that
i dislike too many people
tbh yeah
technically 3
a year and four months
???
naw
almost constantly
i like a whoke lot of different stuff
kinda but im really bad at it
never been to one
maybe idk
no
none that i can think of
oh my god u and ur damn lists
none
ifinhad a library it would be wasted bc i'd never read anything
saw vi
weird ass wording but horror movies
joestar birthmark, east
public indecency
i don't know
i'd keep it anyways???? da fuq
i'd just picj me and my best friend up and renove us from our old friend group
radium bc j said so
2020
a gun and "this is gaytarded"
death rollercoaster i'll test it and everything
fuck
none........... it won't happen........
amanda young
sleeping
kinda idk
i don't <3
no
no
no
nooooooo oh ny gourd
half empty and im about to spill the reston the floor bc my hands are too cokd to hold anything
i don't even know anymore brother
if i tell you none of my wishes will cone true
NO
yeah
atheistic satanism
depends on the amount
i have neither so does it really matter
very
kick every bad person out of america and shape the country into a safe haven
i think it's circumstancial tbh
rewatch saw v
adam stanheight bc we're both losers with not much going for us. we love animals and have rocky relationships with our family and similar music taste and a creative outlet that's the only thing we really have. plus cigarettes also make me bust a nut in front of hot dilfs LMFAO
i missed a question at some point and i can't fund it so uhmmmmm last answer was suppoised to be this one
procrastinator
no
nooooooooo
nothing
my music
no
no
no
no
no
no
no lul
no
no
yes stop asking
molly
no
no
everything
yes
no
probably
yes
i don't think so
no
badly
depends
i don't know anymore
yes
not well
better
everything
what the fuck is an intem
going back to bed
no eat my balls
yes
costas mandylor
no
Aaaaaaaaaaask aawwwwwaaaaaaaaaaaay :D
Personal
1- How are you?
2- Post a picture of yourself.
3- Do you ever wish you were someone else?
4- What is your entire name?
5- How old are you?
6- Age you get mistaken for:
7- Your zodiac/horoscope and if you think it fits your personality:
8- What did you do on your last birthday?
9- What is one thing you would like to accomplish before your next birthday?
10- What is your hair color?
11- Have you ever dyed your hair?
12- What is your eye color?
13- If you could change your eye color, would you?
14- Do you wear contacts/glasses?
15- Your opinion about your body and how confortable you are with it:
16- Have you ever considered plastic surgery? What would you alter about your body?
17- Say 8 facts about your body:
18- Do you have any tattoos?
19- Do you have any piercings?
20- Left or right handed?
21- What’s your sexual orientation?
22- Do you drink?
23- Do you smoke?
24- Do you have any pets?
25- Where do you work?
26- Something you are working on right now:
27- Do you have any “rules” about food?
28- Where are you from?
29- What would you say is your best quality?
30- What do you think you’re really good at?
31- What do you think you’re really bad at?
32- What talent do you wish you’d been born with?
33- Are you a bad person?
34- Are you nice to everyone?
35- Say 3 facts about your personality:
36- Has someone ever spread a nasty rumor about you?
37- What is your ideal bed? Why?
38- Did you wake up cranky?
39- Do you sleep with a stuffed toy?
40- What do you think about the most?
41- Share 2 habits:
42- What you want to be when you “get older”?
43- What are your career goals?
44- What is your ideal career?
45- Is your life anything like it was two years ago?
46- Do you replay things that have happened in your head?
47- Have you ever had an imaginary friend?
48- Say 10 facts about your room:
49- Do you have any phobias?
50- Have you ever been to a psychiatrist/therapist?
51- Are you allergic to anything? If so, what?
52- Ever broken any bones?
53- Ever come close to death?
54- Things you like and dislike about yourself:
55- A random fact about yourself:
56- What are three things most people don’t know about you?
57- An unknown fact about your life:
58- Share something about yourself others might think is weird:
59- Five weird things that you like:
60- Do you have a facebook? If so, would you add the person who sent you this?
61- Do you have any pictures on your Facebook?
62- Describe yourself in one word/sentence:
63- A quote you try to live by:
64- Leave me a compliment:
Favorites
65- What is your favorite thing to do?
66- What’s your favorite color?
67- What’s your favorite band/singer?
68- What’s your favorite movie?
69- What are your favorite books?
70- What is your favorite quote and why?
71- What is your favorite word?
72- What is your least favorite word?
73- What is your favorite type of food?
74- Your favorite ice cream?
75- What’s your favorite animal?
76- Dogs or cats?
77- Describe your favourite texture:
78- What is your favorite flower?
79- What’s your favourite scent? And on the opposite sex?
80- What is your favorite season?
81- What are the top five places you wish you could go before you die?
82- What are four things you can’t live without and why?
83- Which mythological creature are you most like? Why?
84- What’s your favorite television show?
85- Favorite place to shop at?
86- Say 2 facts about your favorite things: Family, childhood and places
87- Say 4 facts about your parents:
88- Are you more like your mom or your dad?
89- Do you have any siblings?
90- Say 9 facts about your family:
91- What’s your relationship like with your family?
92- Say 7 facts about your childhood:
93- The best and the worst childhood memories:
94- Say 6 facts about your home town:
95- Are you going out of town soon?
96- Where would you like to live?
97- What would your dream house be like?
98- Where would you go on your dream vacation?
99- Where you want to be right now?
100- Top three places to visit:
Friends
101- Would you ever smile at a stranger?
102- Do you prefer to be friends with girls or boys?
103- Who is someone you never tire of?
104- Do you have someone you can be your complete self around?
105- Who is your most loyal friend?
106- Is there anyone you can tell EVERYTHING to?
107- If your best friend died, what would you do?
108- A reason you’ve lied to a friend:
109- Have you ever felt replaced?
110- Say 5 facts about your bestfriend(s):
Relationships
111- The last person you hugged?
112- Who was your first kiss with?
113- Do you like kissing in public?
114- Have you ever kissed someone older than you?
115- You have a preference for boys or girls?
116- Is the male or female body closest to perfection?
117- Do you believe in love at first sight?
118- Do you believe in soul mates?
119- What is your idea of the perfect date?
120- Based on past relationships or crushes, describe your perfect boyfriend/girlfriend:
121- What is the first thing you noticed in someone?
122- Are looks important in a relationship?
123- What’s the most superficial characteristic you look for?
124- What’s your opinion on age differences in relationships?
125- Would you ever date someone off of the Internet?
126- Five guys/girls whom you find attractive:
127- Do you have a crush on anyone?
128- A description of the girl/boy you like:
129- Say 1 fact about the person your like:
130- If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say?
131- When was the last time you told someone you loved them?
132- Do you think someone has feelings for you?
133- Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?
134- Have you ever cried over a guy/girl?
135- Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?
136- Anyone you’re giving up on?
137- Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to?
138- Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?
139- Have you ever liked one of your best friends?
140- Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you?
141- Is there a boy/girl who you would do absolutely everything for?
142- Is there someone you will never forget?
143- Say five ways to win your heart:
144- What turns you on?
145- What turns you off?
146- What is the sexiest thing someone could ever do for/to you?
147- What’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for you?
148- What’s something sweet you’d like someone to do for you?
149- Have you ever written a song or poem for someone? Have you had one written for you?
150- What’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever done for someone?
151- Are you in love?
152- Are you in a relationship?
153- If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her?
154- Are relationships ever worth it?
155- Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are?
156- Can you commit to one person?
157- Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat?
158- Do you ever want to get married?
159- Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?
160- Future names of your children:
161- Do you get jealous easily?
162- The last time you felt jealous, and why?
163- What is your definition of cheating?
164- Have you ever been cheated on?
165- Do you forgive betrayal?
166- Have you ever cheated on someone?
167- Why did your last relationship fail?
168- Things you want to say to an ex:
169- A description of the person you dislike the most:
170- If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept?
171- How many boyfriends/girlfriends have you had?
172- How long was your longest relationship?
173- You’ll love me if…
174- Share a relationship story:
Music, movies and books
175- How often do you listen to music?
176- What kind of music you like?
177- Do you like to dance?
178- What was the first concert/show you attended?
179- Have you heard a song that reminds you of someone today?
180- Share a song that takes you to a certain memory in the past:
181- A song that’s been stuck in your head:
182- Put your music player on shuffle and write the first ten songs that play:
183- A book you want to read/have recently read:
184- Describe your dream library:
185- Last movie you just watched:
186- Do you like watching what type of movies? Situations and crazy things
187- You’re in a tattoo parlor about to get inked. What are you getting done?
189- What’s something you can see yourself going to jail for?
190- If you could be any character, from any literary work, who would you choose to be?
191- You’re given $10,000…under one condition: you cannot keep the money for yourself. Who would you give it to?
192- If you had to go back in time and change one thing, what would it be?
193- If you were an element on the Periodic Table, which would you be and why?
194- If you had to delete one year of your life completely, which would it be?
195- You’re an Action Movie Hero. What’s your weapon of choice and the line you scream when defeating your arch enemy?
196- If you could design an amusement park ride, what would it be like?
197- What is the first curse word that comes to mind?
198- What the last party you went to was… and when the next will be…
199- Halloween costume idea?
200- What are you supposed to be doing right now?
201- Currently wanting to see anyone?
202- Why you follow me?
203- If you met me what would you do?
204- Leave me a ridiculous question:
205- Leave me a cute message: Opinions and beliefs
206- Is the cup half full or half empty for you right now?
207- Do you believe in fate/destiny?
208- What you wish for on 11:11?
209- Do you consider yourself lucky? What’s your good luck charm?
210- Do you believe in aliens or life on other planets?
211- What is your religion, if any?
212- Would you go against your moral code for money?
213- What’s more important to you: strength of the body or strength of the mind?
214- How important you think education is?
215- If you were the president, what would you do?
216- If you could change one thing in the world, what would you change?
217- Is it the thought that counts? Or is that phrase circumstantial?
218- If you only had 24 hours to live, what would you do?
219- Which movie character do you most identify with and why?
Feelings and Others
220- Are you a procrastinator or do you get things done early?
221- Post a photo/draw a picture/write a poem (pick one) of a moment of personal significance:
222- Say 5 things you love unconditionally:
223- What motivates you in life?
224- Something that you’re proud of:
225- Five words/phrases that make you laugh:
226- Share the story of something that makes you smile:
227- Something you always think “what if…” about:
228- What was something you used to enjoy, but was ruined for you? What’s the story behind that?
229- Describe one of the most awkward experiences of your life:
230- Something/someone that you miss:
231- Are you over your past?
232- What is your saddest memory?
233- One of the hardest moments in your life:
234- Is there something that happened in your past that you hate talking about?
235- What’s something you want to do that you’d be embarrassed to tell other people about?
236- What was your most embarrassing moment?
237- Share one of your fears/insecurities:
238- Something you’re currently worrying about:
239- Have you done something you regret very much?
240- If you could take something back that you said or did, what would it be?
241- Does anyone hate you?
242- Do you hate anyone?
243- Are you good at hiding your feelings?
244- What’s something you hide about your personality?
245- How do you approach social situations?
246- Are you a social or an antisocial person?
247- Are you an introvert or an extrovert?
248- Do you care if people talk badly about you?
249- How do you deal with criticism?
250- How you hope your future will be like?
251- What’s something that scares you about the future?
252- Five intems you lust after:
253- One thing you’re excited for:
254- Describe the most terrifying/strangest/beautiful dream you’ve ever had:
255- Have you ever had a crush on a fictional character?
256- Who is your celebrity crush?
257- Make a confession:
#kira's answering questions. again.#started this at 7:13#finished at 8:05#boring ass questions istg#they started out so solid too#actually i think these just made me feel worse 💀💀💀
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me rewatching "just being friendly" mv by msp cast at 2am and wondering for 257463637 time where the heck gmmtv found this whole cast
#so I've been away from tumblr like for 3 days idk i was feeling really bad these day#but look i rewatched their mv and dance performance and it boosted my mood so much!!!#but seriously where did they found the#did they hide them for all this time on purpose??? just to release this masterpiece of the series???#also when i first watched that dance performance i screamed that LITERALLY EVERY ONE OF THEM CAN SING what the fuck gmmtv#my heart is full like full FULL#also who dressed gemini in that shirt when they were dancing? i want to personally thank you#my school president#jey talks#brb gonna listen to them on spotify 🥺❤️🥺❤️#can i say that fourth voice in this cover is like syzygwuzvsyswg I'M IN LOVE especially when he's singing the chorus and the beat changes
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A/N ♕ This is gaudy as shit and I don't care. Idk. There may be inconsistencies with the story, so, sorry. I've been working on this all day. 8 pages on Google Docs so you're in for a read. Good stuff starts at page 3 (mind you, this is from Google Docs perspective.) I read, reread, rereread, rerereread, rererereread .... until I couldn't. This is a little headcanon-y and a little fic-y. It's just what I was feeling. I know you know what to do if there's anything horribly wrong. For real, though. This is so fucking long I never want to see my laptop again.
C/W ♕ Unprotected P->V, F->M & M->F Oral, M->eating his cum (sorta) from F, kinda rough sex but they like it. I'm so brain dead right now that I can't remember everything. Soft broken Hanma eventually. I like you, no shit? I like you too. Kiss kiss. Snooze snooze. Happy happy.
Funsies ♕ A link of the playlist I made while I was writing this in case anyone wants to check it out. I don't think the read will exhaust the playlist so pick any song you want and it should, theoretically work at any point?
WC ♕ 3,915 (ISH - I change things once I get it here on Tumblr, but it's around that.
♕ You'll never forget the first time you rode on the back of Hanma's bike with him.
♕ He wasn't really keen on the idea of taking you home. You weren't even his responsibility.
♕ But it was a favor for one of his captains.
♕ Hanma put his helmet on you, tightening the strap under your chin carefully so he wouldn't pinch your delicate skin.
♕ He was so pissed when he noticed how pretty your eyes were, staring so intently back into his. He had to shake himself out of the distraction.
♕ "You're not wearing a helmet, Shuji?" You asked.
♕ "This's the only one I have, obviously. And you're going to wear it, got it?" He was so adamant about that.
♕ He got you settled in the helmet and threw his leg over his bike. Looking at you impatiently, waiting for you to get on, he put his hand out and you took it.
♕ You hopped on behind him and wrapped your arms around his straight waistline. And you're not sure if your heart skipped a beat because you were so nervous about being on the back of a motorcycle with him for the first time or if it was how you felt with your cheek pressed to his back
♕ He also noticed how nice your arms felt wrapped around him. He turned his head before he took off and told you you'd better hold on tighter, he doesn't drive like a 30 year old.
♕ Hanma thought he turned his head enough from your line of vision before he smiled. But you saw it.
♕ So you did what he asked and squeezed him tighter, pressing your chest harder against his back.
♕ He started the engine and the vibrations sent shockwaves throughout your cunt body like you've never experienced.
♕ Both you and Hanma thought it wasn't possible for you to get any closer to him, but you both somehow managed to impress the other.
♕ He was at a stoplight about 3 blocks from your house and he reached back to give your thigh a little pat.
♕ "Hold on to me, hana. I'm gonna go like hell when I see that light turn green."
♕ His hand stayed on your thigh even after he took off. Stayed there for so long, actually, that you were getting concerned about the upcoming turn in the road. But he pulled his hand forward just in time to take it with ease.
♕ The wind against your face that carried his scent - which you could NOT place, (Sandlewood? Cedar? It was DELICIOUS to say the least) was starting to make you feel drunk.
♕ You could just barely hear the music playing through the small (but strangely loud) speakers --- Be Quiet and Drive (Far Away), Deftones. You had heard the song before and liked it but now it held a certain heaviness over you. Everything about this moment felt right. The night was warm. The stars were out.
♕ How the fuck had you not realized this before?
♕ Hanma is ... he's fucking sexy.
♕ He pulled up to your place and he stopped the bike, letting it idle while sitting in your driveway.
♕ "Ok, you have arrived at your destination. You're welcome, for the ride of your life." He seemed a little more lighthearted now than when he first was roped into taking you home.
♕ "Yeah. Yeah, thanks. Um, thanks. Do you - maybe ... want some ..." you just couldn't fucking talk. He looked so handsome in the soft yellow lights that lined the street.
♕ "You got some food? I could eat, yeah." He kicked the bike stand out and turned it off and reached up to remove his helmet from your head.
♕ If he missed the blush that washed over your face he'd have to be a blind man. But you noticed a faint smile on him, too. So you think he caught it.
♕ "What do you feel like? I just went shopping and I'm fully stocked." You stood with your back to him, he was in the living room looking around at the shit you had all over your walls. Weird art that made him feel things. Stuff he's never thought himself capable of feeling - not bad things, either. But new things.
♕ And you felt comfortable with all of this. Knowing he was in another room than you. Except, he wasn't in the living room anymore. He was right fucking behind you. You stopped to look up into the cupboard you stood in front of to see what was there, if it was easy and quick to fix up.
♕ He reached out and traced the curve of your waist and leaned in, putting his face to the back of your head. "You going to feed me, y/n?"
♕ Your first thought was who's going to perform CPR on your right now because you're about to die. His breath was so hot on the back of your neck you were able to document the time that your heart actually stopped beating for a second.
♕ Hanma put his hands on your shoulders and ran them down your arms. When he got to your wrists, he pulled them behind your back more roughly than you've ever been touched by any man before.
♕ And he's so much taller than you, so he has to bend over so he can talk right into your ear.
♕ "I'm sure it's ready for me to eat right now. Not much prep is going to be required. I guess, in a way, you could almost call it fast food?" He yanked you so you were standing up straight and your back was flush with his front.
♕ You didn't know what to do with your hands so you just left them where he placed them. He had his free hand back on your waist, squeezing and exploring.
♕ "I don't think I've ever wanted something so bad as I do right now, hana." He said, letting his fingers dip lower and lower. You threw your head back and it fit into the dip between his neck and shoulder.
♕ You couldn't help but think he was such a fucking gentleman, waiting for your permission before he took anything. You leaned back against his chest and turned your head to kiss him. "Then take ... take it. Take what you want, Shuji. Take it all."
♕ Hanma's hand went back up to your throat and squeezed just enough to make you gasp.
♕ He leaned around and pressed his mouth to the corners of your lips, teasing you into giving yourself fully over to the kiss and sliding his tongue down your jawline to your neck. Ending up at your ear once more.
♕ "Good girl, hana. You're so wet for me right now, I can fucking smell it. Tell me what you want me to take. Hm? You want me to take you? You're going to be so good for me. Or maybe not? Maybe you're just going to be a nasty ... little ... bitch. I think I'd like to see that. This sweet girl act you put on. I've seen you walking around like you're just the best thing around here. Well? You going to prove that to me, hana? Huh?" He said, his voice dropping an octave as he ran his hand down your stomach and dipped his fingers into your panties.
♕ He moaned into your ear, "Oh fuck, hana. You're dripping for me. I'm going to fucking ruin you."
♕ He turned you around more roughly than he had to and hoisted you onto the counter, yanking your pants down and kneeling down before you, inhaling your scent. Deeply.
♕ Hanma looked up at you with such fire in his eyes, you couldn't help but feel a little intimidated. He traced his finger over your pussy, feeling your wetness before leaning forward and dragging his tongue over the same invisible line his finger forged on your trembling skin.
♕ You arched your back and gasped as he brushed his lips against your thighs. You could feel how heavy his breathing had gotten. He pushed one finger passed your folds, then two, and you could feel yourself tightening around him.
♕ "Shu, f-fuck. Please, I need ... I need ..."
♕ He looked up at you with his eyebrows raised. "What do you need, hana. Use your words."
♕ You reached down and grabbed him by the ears, pulling him up to your face. "I ... fuck me, Shuji." You kissed him, tasting yourself on him.
♕ Hanma didn't waste a second. He pulled you off the counter and dragged you into your bedroom. You turned around and yanked at his belt buckle, pulling it from the loops all at once and threw it across the room, unzipping his pants and pulling them down.
♕ He leaned you over the bed, spreading your legs and reaching up to squeeze your ass. You looked back at him, wanting him to fill you up.
♕ Hanma rubbed his tip up and down your slit, teasing you. "Shuji just ... just fuck me."
♕ You were so whiny and needy. It was making him so hard. He wanted to fuck you right then and there. To give you what you were so desperately and metaphorically, on your knees for.
♕ But the sadist in him, found it hard to acknowledge your pleas so soon. He didn't want you to work for this, per se. But he wanted to make good and damn sure you wanted him as much as he wanted you. So what if he had to deny himself instant gratification. The look on your sweet, flushed face was already worth having to drag this out.
♕ "You've been so good for me, hana. I'm going to give you exactly what you need. But I don't want you to come too soon." He said, smirking as he pulled you back to your feet and turned you around, pressing his hands into your shoulders until you were on your knees.
♕ Hanma reached down and pulled his cock out of his boxers and he patted your chin a few times. Urging your mouth to open so he could slap it on your tongue before pushing his tip into your mouth. You let him guide you as you took him down your throat. He kept his eyes on you, watching as you struggled to take him all the way in.
♕ "Fuck, y/n. Look at you. Taking me like a good little slut. I knew you were going to act like a little bitch in heat. Choking down my cock like that." He praised you through gritted teeth. Despite sounding so volatile, it made you feel so good to be used by him this way.
♕ He pulled out of your mouth and pushed you back onto the bed, flipping you over onto your stomach. He pulled your hips up and guided his tip into you, slowly pushing himself in until he was all the way inside you.
♕ Hanma held himself there for a minute, feeling you tighten around him. He started moving again, in and out of you.
♕ You felt like you were on the edge of an orgasm with every thrust. The disgusting way he used you for his own pleasure and the way he spoke to you was driving you mad.
♕ "Shuji, fuck ... I'm gonna cum."
♕ He pulled out and turned you onto your back. He spread your legs apart and leaned over you, pushing himself back inside you and pressing his lips to yours.
♕ "Yeah? How close? How close are you?" He dragged his teeth over your ear and on down to your visibly beating pulse point and left a purple mark in his wake. You clenched up around his cock so hard when he did this that he had to stop moving and pull himself together. "Fuck! Hana! Keep that shit up and this is over. I'm fucking finished."
♕ He thrust into you harder, his balls slapping against your ass wasn't helping you hold off cumming all over him. You felt your orgasm building up inside you. You reached down to rub your clit, but he saw where your fingers were aiming and he brushed your hand aside and started rubbing soft circles on it for you. It made you moan - the most whorish, slutty sound you have ever let out.
♕ It was out of your control at this point. His dick pounding inside of you, hitting all the right spots at all the right times was making you more cock-drunk than you have ever felt. If you could even consider yourself aware of anything other than his golden eyes burning holes into yours and the rise and fall of his hips against your spread legs.
♕ Your cunt swallowed his cock so perfectly. The thought crossed your mind that you were made for each other. But that's ridiculous. Hanma hates you. Right? He didn't even want to take you home. So why, then, is he balls deep inside of you right now. Don't fucking ask, you thought to yourself. Doing any and every little thing you could to stave off your imminent crash.
♕ He could see your eyes start to roll back and he knew what was happening. He pressed his thumb harder against your clit and started circling it faster.
♕ "Cum for me, hana. Show me how much you wanted this, how much you wanted my cock inside of you." He sucked on your nipple as he fucked you. Balancing over you on his left hand, his right hand still trifling with your pulsing clit. You tried to buck up against him for any extra stimulation but he only pulled back. "Aht! I make you cum. You ... you let me. Understand, hana? I ... make ... you ... cum." He growled through his clenched jaw directly into your ear. Punctuating each word with driving his hips harder and harder against you.
♕ You couldn't hold it in anymore. You came so hard and you didn't even care that he was watching you so closely. You let your body relax and gave in to the moment. You'd pretty much checked out mentally, but whatever connection remained between your brain and your body was otherworldly. You felt his cock sliding in and out of your soaked cunt. It was so thick and long. Nothing like you imagined it would be by just looking at his tall, thin frame. (But aren't those guys always the wildcard?) It was all you could focus on.
♕ Hanma was ready to cum, too. He pulled out of you and turned you over onto your stomach again. He slapped his wet cock against your ass before pushing back into your pussy, making you moan into the sheets.
♕ You were still twitching against him. As close as he was to blowing his sticky load of cum inside of you, as hard as his cock was twitching, he was so transfixed by how you felt around him. So fucking hot. So fucking soft. So fucking beautiful. Like a goddamn flower. Your pussy made him think of the most beautiful flower and nothing would ever change his mind about that. (And he would never figure out why - but he wondered if it had to do with the weird art in your living room).
♕ "Fuck, hana. Fuck!Fuck!Fuck! You want me to cum inside this pussy? Want me to cum in my pussy, huh? Yeah? Fuck, cumming so fuck- hard, holy shit. Fuck!" Hanma came with such force, you could feel his cum pouring into you. And soon after, seeping out of you from around his cock still inside of your stretched hole. He collapsed on top of you, both of you breathing heavily. He didn't want to move, not yet.
♕ And he felt like it should bother him that he was still here with you. Still, physically, a part of you, as much as you were a part of him. But he couldn't think of a single reason why he should leave. Let alone why he'd want to leave.
♕ "Shu, you ... I ... well," you tried to speak but couldn't form a coherent thought just yet. "Um," it was useless. You couldn't think. So you just laid there underneath him. Feeling more and more empty with each passing second as the sadness of this being over filled you instead feeling full from Hanma. It was not a good placeholder for him. It was not feeling nearly as good as he did. And you felt like crying.
♕ Whether because it was just too much for you or it was just nothing to him. What if it were both? Shit. You're starting to cry.
♕ He felt you tremble underneath him and he rolled off of you, turning you over to face him.
♕ "Hey, what's wrong? Hana? Look at me, now. Did I hurt you? Did I do something?" He looked more concerned that irritated. And that's probably what surprised you the most. You tried to hide your face, but he grabbed your chin and pulled you back.
♕ "No, it's ... it's nothing. I just ... it was too much. You were too good." You said, laughing hard through the tears, wholly embarrassed by your generous assessment.
♕ "Oh, what now?" Hanma smiled and kissed you on the forehead. He reached down and grabbed your hand, bringing it to his mouth and kissing it. "You say I was too good? Were you even here? I mean ... I guess it's impossible for you to feel yourself. But, I guess ... I guess I'm only as good as who I'm with? And, hana," he cupped your face in his rough, slightly grease stained and scarred hand, "you were good, too."
♕ You laughed again, shaking your head. "Don't ... don't be nice to me. I can't handle it. And that's not even ... you don't have to say that to me. I know you don't like me. You can't fucking stand me. I knew all of this when I asked your captain to make you give me a ride. How embarrassing is that. I fucking am so pathetic sometimes." You rubbed your eyes with the heel of your palm. "God. You can go. You don't have to stay. It's alright. I'm ... I'll be ... fine. I always am."
♕ Hanma sat up on his elbow, looking down at you with his brow furrowed. "Hana. I can't believe you're this stupid." He rubbed the back of his neck and looked out into the hallway.
♕ "Shuji! Who the fuck is Hana? And why do you keep calling me that? My name is-" great, now you look sad and insane.
♕ "Chill, crazy. Hana means blossom. And I think, ffffuck. Ithinkyou'reprettylikeaflowerplusyourpussyispretty." His words ran together but you heard every single separate syllable. You're pretty sure you fell in love with him a little bit, too. The fucker.
♕ He leaned over you again, pressing his lips to yours. You moaned against his mouth and reached to grab his cock, but he stopped you. "No. I wanna make you feel good. It's your turn." He kissed your neck and made his way down to your pussy, licking up his own cum that had dripped out of you. You bucked your hips up into his face, reaching down to grab a fistful of his hair.
♕ He looked up at you with wide eyes, smirking. "Hold on, hana. I got you." He sucked your clit between his lips, pressing his tongue against it and making you cry out in pleasure. He pushed two fingers into your pussy and started pumping them in and out of you, hitting your g-spot while he circled your clit with the tip of his tongue.
♕ "Fuck, Shu! Fuck me!" You screamed.
♕ He looked up at you with his eyelids still heavy. "That's what I'm trying to do, baby." He said, chuckling. "Just this time, it's with my mouth. Ok? So sit back and enjoy the ride." He leaned back down and continued sucking and licking and pumping you until you couldn't hold on anymore. You came for him, all over his face. And he didn't seem to mind one bit.
♕ He crawled up to you and laid beside you again. You looked over at him and smiled. "You're such an asshole. But I kind of like you."
♕ He leaned over and kissed you, letting you taste yourself on him. Again. "No shit? I've liked you for a while. But I ... hell, I don't know. I guess I thought you were too good for me or something." He put his head against your chest, subconsciously counting the heartbeats coming from your body. "That's usually what people tell me. The guys and stuff. They always give me shit about anyone I like. Except ... except for you. They respect you."
♕ You nodded slowly, spacing out on the chunk of blond hair above his forehead. "Yeah, it helps having a cousin who's a captain. But Shuji, I do. I really do like you. I just wanted you to know that."
♕ Hanma looked up at you with a softness in his eyes you had never seen before. "I know, hana. I know." He kissed you again, pulling the sheet over both of you. He didn't want you to see him get worked up. Not over you. Not emotionally. Not just yet. But he was pretty sure he was starting to fall in love with you. And that was just something he wasn't prepared for. Though he'd have to face up to it. Sooner, rather than later, he thought.
♕ He turned over onto his back and let you snuggle up next to him, throwing your arm over his chest. He closed his eyes, thinking about how much he'd like to do this again. Just like this. Just you.
♕ You reached over and turned off the lamp, laying your head against his chest and simply being in the darkened room with him. It was so easy, you thought. And you hoped it would always be that way, though you knew better than to believe that. Because Hanma was a very complicated man on the outside and inside. And you wanted to be the one who could be there to understand him. The one who could get to know him. The one who could make him laugh and cry and feel any and everything he ever wanted to feel. You wanted to be the one who'd be there to listen to anything he had to say. Softly spoken or screamed out.
♕ And that's all you wanted. To be there for him. And with him. And with him.
♕ "Good night, little hana." He said, pulling you tighter against him.
♕ "Good night, beautiful Shuji." You smiled in the darkness and drifted off to sleep.
♕ And you didn't care how much you'd regret saying it or how much you'd try to deny it. It was true. You were in love with him. And you knew it would be some time before he could admit he felt the same way. But you would give him whatever amount of time he needed.
♕ He hoped he would be worth it. Hanma wasn't necessarily a good man. He has never been called a good man. Never has he ever really felt like one.
♕ But he heard you talking to him in the morning before you got out of bed to fix the coffee. Telling him how you'd be there for him as best you could. No matter what.
♕ He thought to himself that he hoped he'd never disappoint you. No matter what.
Taglist ::: @katkitkats @darkstarlight82 @arlerts-angel @viburnt @kazutora-kurokawa
#tokyo revengers smut#tokyo revengers x reader#tokyo revengers x you#tokyo revengers x y/n#tokyo rev#tokrev#hanma shuji#hanma smut#hanma shuji smut#hanma shuji x reader#hanma shuji x you#hanma shuji x y/n#shuji hanma#tokyo revengers hanma#x female reader#x y/n smut#x you smut#tokyo rev x reader#tokyo rev smut#tokyo revengers
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TW- ed rant
This is my first ever tumblr post. Normally I'm just a wall flower, sitting quietly in the tumblr corner reading other peoples posts and thoughts hoping to feel less alone in my own mind. I'm not even sure what I want to say but for the past 4 years I have struggled with my eating, some days are really bad and other days it's just like an itch, like I know all the rules, fear and guilt that has stained me but I feel stronger not to let it win. 2-3 years ago I was at my worst, I was in my 3rd year of University, I had lost all hope and drive in my life and I let everything crumble through my fingers, I was failing classes, isolating from everyone, loosing sight of my dreams and what mattered to me. I don't know who was holding the wheel to my life but I felt I had lost control with all of it. I didn't know how to change or help myself, I was so tired of always feeling like a failure to myself and everyone around me. I had been dealing with depression and anxiety for so long and serious case of undiagnosed ADHD and all these feeling felt so permanent, like they would never go away, so I turned to something I felt I could control, which was food. There was nothing I hated more in the world than myself, my body, my face, the way that I believed people saw me. I hated every inch of who I was. I thought that if i could control what went in i would get the results I've always wanted and maybe even get to like the way I look. And the results came, it felt so good to be able to get something right, like for the first time in my life I didn't feel like a complete failure. The feeling of hunger gave me power, how I didn't have to say words to people that I was hurting inside because they could see it from the outside. Wake up, look in the mirror, walk, workout, coffee, walk, coffee, porridge, starve, walk, mirror, bed. This was my life but fortunately or unfortunately I was sniffed out like a rat from one of my house mates who confronted me, it felt like I was standing there naked and exposed with all my secrets written on my skin. After that I felt I had to change, I felt watched and analysed with every move I made. My weight goals put into a box, I tried to make amends with my body and mind but from the years to follow the voices never left my head. Sometimes the voices are merely a whisper and other days the voices are so loud it feels like everyone else can hear them too. Now here I am on tumblr 4 years later writing to say I have relapsed, not that I think I ever recovered but more I was idle with temptation to destroy myself and now I'm back, born again to hack my body to pieces. Ive found myself almost everyday purging in the bathroom, even if its been a normal, healthy meal. I just want to crawl out of my skin and shrink into nothing. I don't want to die and I don't want to live like this but i feel years of rage within me of unnoticed pain that I want to scream to the world and let them know. I have dreams and I want them to exist one day as true but I don't know how I'll ever rid myself of these dark paralysing thoughts. I'm so tired of feeling unloved and lonely, in my 22 years of life I have never known what it is or what it feels like when someone choses to love you. Im so convinced by my own hatred for myself that I believe everyone else sees me the way I do. The toxic thing is, is that I want this for myself, I want the hunger in sanctuary of starving, I want to feel small and fragile and i want people to worry, i want them to say "she's lost weight", while they ponder on how hurt I must be to have lost myself this far.
Anyway enough for one day. idk if anyone reads these long word vomit tumblr posts but thank you if you've read this far and welcome to my fkd up mind.
#@tw edd#tw ed ana#tw ana bløg#tw ana rant#bulim14#tw depressing stuff#eating disoder trigger warning#tw 3d vent#disordered eating mention#bingepurge#ed story#3d relapse#ana rexx#ed but not ed sheeran#ed d!et#thinspø
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weekly tag wednesday thursday <3
omg how is it wednesday thursday again already?! where has this week gone? i've basically been MIA here since the last one lol so thank you to @jrooc @creepkinginc @energievie @deedala @gardenerian
@blue-disco-lights @sgtmickeyslaughter @vintagelacerosette for the tags! i love you all! i love this place! i'm so happy we get to scream about it today!
- - - - OKAY LET'S GET INTO IT - - - -
how did you get into the fandom? i fully fell into gallavich in the spring of 2021 & starting shoving fics in my face faster than ian & mickey took their clothes off when ian went to get the gun back, mickey. then i started noticing that people were linking their tumblrs in the end notes & so i lurked suuuper hard through the summer until i finally made my own blog!
how long have you been here? almost three glorious years <3
what’s the first fandom channel you found? (Youtube, Reddit, Tumblr, Insta, Twitter, FB, other?) i suppose youtube is correct because i watched a bunch of edits that really cemented my obsession, but tumblr was the first place i interacted with fandom friends :)
what’s your favourite now? i'm a tumblrina for life!
which mutual have you known the longest in the fandom? this will always make me so fucking emotional -- my first mutual was @metalheadmickey & now i've been to their wedding *sobs forever*
which tumblerino’s did you have your first fandom crush(es) on and wanted to get to know? oooohalskfj this is a hard one! there have been so many! when i first showed up, i started collecting beloved mutuals like pokemon... but to steal from mel, there was a real HUZZAH moment around getting a message from @whatwouldmickeydo & now i'm gonna go to their wedding *continues sobbing forever*
first Gallavich fan fic you read (or that blew you away that you remember) the holy trinity of my early fandom days were absolutely like real people do by grayola, restoration by @palepinkgoat & the increasingly poor decisions of ian gallagher by @goodkwuestion
first fan art that blew your mind? yooo we are so blessed around these parts & at the beginning it was another trilogy lol - @steorie @psychicskulldamage & @darthvaders-wife
fanfic trope that you were sure wasn’t for you but now you low key (or high key) love? a/b/o! truly shocking to discover & then love & then WRITE A WHOLE MULTI-CHAP FIC OF
What surprised you most about this fandom? omg how smushy soft everyone is! halskfjalfj - like, it's a pretty hard show to watch at times & the characters are all so messy & not saying we have it altogether over here or anything, but everyone's just a kind little marshmallow! :)
moment in the show (or YT vids if you’re one of those) that you fell in hyperfixation with Gallavich? the first one was probably s3 "not everybody gets to blurt out how they fucking feel every minute!" because i was like, OHHH OH THIS IS GONNA HURT ME & then it just kept getting worse....
Ian or Mickey? mickey baby ily so much. but to echo others, they really are two halves of the same brain cell & they've fought so hard to be together. so idk how you choose!
Which Gallagher or Milkovich are you? jeeeez, maybe fiona? lip? liam? hahaha probably none of them tbh, but i love 'em like family!
- - - - -
tagging @thisdivorce @rereadanon @sickness-health-all-that-shit @crossmydna & @heymrspatel if you wanna play! if not, i'm smooching you on your nose <3
#i love this tag game & i love this fandom!#WHAT A GIFT IT IS TO BE HERE PLAYING WITH ALL OF YOU#making shit#loving on each other#yeah. it's just a good good group#& some good good boy dolls#thank god#weekly tag wednesday
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tagged by @killerandhealerqueen (i just keep forgetting abt this one SIGH but i have free time rn and im committed)
1. why did you choose your url?
growing up, i just wasn't a social media girl purely bc of the fact that my parents were super strict and I assumed they wouldn't allow me to have it and I just never really saw the appeal anyways. Then later a few friends basically forced me to make my first account and because i wasn't very creative and thought i was the funniest bitch ever i made my first user 'ifyouinsist' and it just kinda stuck ig
2. any sideblogs? if you have them name them and why you have them.
nope. i fear if i had a sideblog id end up neglecting it and forget abt it or make it my new main blog and neglect this blog and this blog is literally my baby
3. how long have you been on tumblr?
well i've had an account since like end of 2019, beginning of 2020???? (im pretty sure) i didnt like use my account tho i just had it to look at other ppls blogs not my own, i only acc recently made up my blog up properly and started posting this year when it was like 2 am and i was on holiday to visit my home country and my mum and my aunts were gossiping and i was like whatever who tf cares how late i am to a fandom and the rest was history
4. do you have a queue tag?
nope, my drafts are a terrifying place and if they ever saw light id die
5. why did you start your blog in the first place?
to reblog pretty art and to compliment writers on ao3 AND on tumblr bc they deserve everything and more
6. why did you choose your icon/pfp?
logan sargeant. need i say any more???? hes my bsf in spirit
7. why did you choose your header?
loscar. LOSCAR. loscar. i am very much totally normal abt them i swear (lying through my teeth rn). they're just my everything unfortunately and sometimes i like to say the fist bump is their version of intertwining their fingers together
8. what’s your post with the most notes?
ik this bc it was the first i myself made and it was abt loscar obviously and i thought i was SO funny (im not) and its lowk still such a flop post but its MY flop post so here it is :)
9. how many mutuals do you have?
idk man im shy (scared of rejection) so i dont have a lot, like genuinely let me go see acc, oh ig its me and my 14 moots against the world i love you guys fr
10. how many followers do you have?
BYE my 26 followers are my 4 lifers fr (im such a flop this is hilarious)
11. how many people do you follow?
37 (sigh need to follow more ppl RN)
12. have you ever made a shitpost?
im gonna be so real idk what defines as a shit post but most probably yeah
13. how often do you use tumblr each day?
idk im acc really inconsistent like ill be MIA for 2 whole days and the next week ill be on tumblr like for most of my day when i can its very confusing like today ive not been on it a lot im academically locking in and all that
14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once?
ummm no. like. if i see someone i follow getting hate ill send them a supportive ask and then at the end of it be like anon ur such a loser get a life but other than that. nope.
15. how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ posts?
im very much neutral abt them, like idc if i need to reblog it yk if i want to i will if i dont then i wont
16. do you like tag games?
YES (said in a very normal voice)
17. do you like ask games
YES. i love getting asks id cry if someone sent an ask (i have one rotting away from a moot rn i WILL answer it i swear)
18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?
can i say all my moots. i wanna say all my moots they're all famous in my eyes guys, i start tagging its gonna end with all my moots being tagged but like @killerandhealerqueen and @dwarvenchords were the first 2 ppl to come to my mind theyre both just the coolest fr
19. do you have a crush on a mutual?
nah. i have FRIEND crushes on literally all of them tho. wanna be their friends SO bad
20. what is the last song you listened to?
Mamichula- Bizarrap
21. what are you currently watching?
in my docuseries era rn watching breakpoint (STILL)(i only have time on the weekends rn SIGH)
22. sweet/ savoury/ spicy?
sweet. im such a 'lets skip the dinner and just get dessert' kinda girl
23. what is your current relationship status?
this is SUCH a complicated question to answer but heavily leaning more towards single
24. what is your current obsession?
sports. like just sports in general. like ive always been a casual fan of sports but i never used to take a deep dive into it but this year i decided to dive, and i dived VERY deep, so like motorsports, tennis, football, cricket, trying to get into hocky rn im collecting them atp. also. documentaries. like when i get time ill be binge watching like 5 documentaries i just love them sm
25. what are nine albums/ songs you've been listening to lately?
wish i could tell you fr, i mean, rn im re listening to SOUR by Olivia Rodriguez AGAIN bc thats the way my life is going SIGH, Olivia is my favourite basic artist fr, nothing compares to listening to SOUR for the first time in 2021
ANYWAYS, thanks again for the tag i really appreciate it, im gonna tag @ezisregrettinglifedecisions @fabeong @whatssthepooiintt
#tag game#these are so fun im such a yapper#i love talking abt myself#sass i really appreciate u tagging me it means the world to me fr#also punctuation who????#need to fix up so bad im so bad at typing with punctuation this is AWFUL
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Tagged by @a-lonely-dunedain to plug OC names into this heacanon generator and see if it fits.
Léonys:
Léonys doesn't own a single pair of matching socks.
Okay, so in actuality no, Léonys has lots of pairs of matching socks and is actually pretty neat about her clothes and stuff when she's at home. BUT I can see this becoming one of those annoying widely-accepted fanon headcanons in direct contradiction to canon because 95% of the time the reader is exposed to her in a, "Has been living in the woods for 3-8 business days, has not spoken to another human being in almost a week, ate bark that was still attached to the tree, laid flat on her back with her mouth open while it was raining to get a drink (for fun)," kind of state, or the many stages of breakdown I dragged her through in Léonys of Rohan. I think if my stuff had a bigger following a lot of people would have trouble reconciling that Léonys with the way she acts when she's, like, in a house.
Léonys does not know what sleep is.
She really does not LMAO. Take a nap, girl
Léonys is smart but also very stupid.
I mean this one's vague enough that it could apply to basically anyone I think. Which means it's a winner! Léonys figured out, on her own, within a few days of properly meeting him, that Aragorn was the heir of the old kings. She also got involved in all that because she saw brigands with hostages and was like, "Go and get help? Tell the town guard? Involve the other hunters? Nah! I'll just follow them! :) and take care of it myself :)."
Léonys crashed a riding lawn mower into their fence.
Absolutely not the ride-on lawnmower goes nowhere except where she told it to go. The ✨🌟🤗🐎💖bond ✨🌟🤗🐎💖 that exists between the Rohirrim and their horses ride-on lawnmowers
Hathellang:
Hathellang is a cry baby.
I mean I guess it depends on what about. This also sort of sounds like a headcanon made up by someone who doesn't actually like the character, so, you know. Subjective. I don't think so. But there's not a lot I would label crybaby anyway.
Hathellang has a roblox account.
Disclaimer: I've never played Roblox. But yeah, I feel like he has one. He used to play a lot more than he does now. But that was years ago. These days no one knows he has it except for Léonys. But sometimes when one of the other kids complains that someone was too mean to them on Roblox he logs on and, well, see,,, if the offender didn't have bannable offenses to work with already then suddenly,,,,, mysteriously,,,,,,,,, they start committing bannable offenses. For literally no reason whatsoever, they must have just felt like it, suddenly. Who knows! Anyway, reported.
(I.E. Hathellang would be a holy terror on the internet, somehow able to talk the trolls into getting themselves banned while only barely toeing the line himself. A power that could be used for good or evil. He uses it to back up his kid siblings on disagreements over the Walmartland makeup obby.)
Hathellang believes in Santa.
He does not! But he's really dedicated to keeping the Santa Experience alive for the younger kids. Also I feel like in a modern AU he'd be super into the Santa Clause movies.
Belharen:
Belharen is afraid of doing anything without their parent's permission.
Belharen is involved in the plot because she ran away from home. Without her parents' permission. That doesn't mean she's not afraid of doing things without her parents' permission. But she still does them.
Ferelin:
Ferelin is tumblr famous.
Oh my god yes. Spot on. IDK what I can add. His shitposts are legendary. Made a new friend. Have informed him that I do not know what a roof is. Think he has little enough knowledge of the Shire that this should fly with him. Eager to see how this plays out. Update: Friend in question visiting my house right now as we speak. Made comment about the roof. Think he remembers what I told him when we first met. Except funnier, probably, IDK. I wonder what his URL would be. He casually refers to his improbable and near-miraculous ability to heal basically anything by singing to it very stubbornly and people think it's some kind of extended bit. He lets them think so because they started to come up with theories about it and it's kind of funny.
Dahlia:
Dahlia knows fnaf lore.
Probably, lol. I feel like she wouldn't play the games, though. I've never played them, this is vibes-based. She just knows the lore. For some reason. Maybe she watches hour-long YouTube videos breaking it down to relax.
And because I've been thinking about her recently some Pegweneth:
Pegweneth instinctively cleans messes in their own house as well as other peoples.
Pegweneth judges people for having messes in their houses TBH. Privately. In her head. She does not clean them. Her house is not clean.
Pegweneth knocks people over by hugging them.
If she knows them very well and is confident they're okay with it.
Pegweneth is not good with social cues.
She knows what they are. She just thinks they're stupid she's above them she responded to them appropriately when she really didn't.
Hmmm, seems like a lot of people I would normally tag in these things have been tagged already. I know many people with OCs and I know that many of them dislike this sort of fandom/headcanon stuff. Open invitation to do it if you want to?
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Huzzah! Art Fight nears its end, I think. I have survived! As have you!…I hope. I’m pretty sure you survived. <3 I know a lot happened there, but we both did ArtFight stuff! You did stuff! I did stuff! You fought hard! Idk if you’re doing any better or worse than before, and idk if you feel bad about any kind of inactivity, but there’s no need to! You’re alive and that’s what matters! If you want or need to take time away a little longer, you can take as much as you need! I’m sure we all love you and will be here when you’re ready <3
Also, since the “war” is over, or ending, we can go back to drawing whatever we want of whatever quality forever again without any pressure or self-imposed pressure to draw something else goodly! Woe! Art be upon ye!
(…I couldn’t remember where I saw your full lil persona before so I’ve been referencing your tumblr pfp and ArtFight pfp and going by memory sorry-)
…love toaster quality art…Ig that proves my point! Though sending this to myself on discord and screenshotting it may not be a good idea…post art fight delirium my beloved. uh let me just-
SCREAMING!!!! okay okay i have been mulling over how to reply to this for days because i was so just. delighted and overwhelmed with this little blorbo-processing universe you've invented for us!!!! F/O Inc...oh man, what a delightful place to work!!! that really is what it feels like logging into Tumblr Dot Com to yell about some new idiot 😂💖💖💖
but now i'm thinking...what exactly are our jobs? do we do fieldwork? certainly you and i are collectors of f/os, hunting down potential obscure characters for people to get obsessed with...what's the corporate hierarchy here? are our clients other selfshippers, or are they the f/os themselves? i'm cracking up at the idea of it being like one of those matchmaking dating services crossed with a crime drama...Ace Attorney style, people bringing in their woes and desperately hunting for an f/o who'll match them perfectly...!!! 😂😂😂 Client, visibly sweating: "Gosh, I-I never usually do this sort of thing, but...it's been so lonely on my dash recently, and I...I was wondering if you had any new, um...Tumblr Sexymen...to recommend?" You, chain-smoking cigarettes with three hanging out of your mouth: "Sweetheart, you've come to the right place. Take a look at these puppies." You yank a thick file from your drawer and slap it down, open, on the desk. "Now, keep an open mind, toots...but you ever hear about this Once-ler fella?" all of the DETAILS in this art are killing me 🙈🙈🙈 your countless cups of coffee, as if you've been trying to cope with the new freaks i've brought into the office 😭💖💖 the little Employee of the Month photo too, oh my gosh!!! i'm honoured :3c and oh my god the TINY Piers, Ramón and Maxime...!!!!!! FUCK the second i get a new laptop and can draw again i need to add to this universe, thank you for coming up with something so brilliant 🥺💖💖💖 accepting new hires for F/O Inc. today! 😉 and HUGE CONGRATULATIONS TO YOU FOR GETTING TO THE END OF ARTFIGHT FRIEND!!!! 😭💖💖💖 so sorry that July decided to kick me in the metaphorical nuts and i wasn't able to attack you back, but THANK YOU SO MUCH for the wonderful art you made me which i treasure so much 🙈💖💖💖 shortly i'll be compiling all the lovely art i received into a little chart, and i can't wait to show off your work!!! i owe you big time 😉 thank you as well for such a lovely pep talk and all the niceness you've thrown my way 🫂 of course i do feel a bit guilty about needing to take a step back and being so open about the burnout, but it's been a busy month for all of us, haven't it? i think August is going to be really nice and fun :3c anyway this is kickass and i'm so glad to be your colleague at F/O Inc. bahahaha 🤣🤣🤣🤣
#f/o inc#f/o incorporated#selfship#oc x canon#artfight#artfight 2024#team seafoam#maxime le mal#ramón salazar#piers#starleskasks#long post
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RWBY questions game
i never get anything for ask games so i decided to just do it lmao. skipped and deleted the ones idk what they mean or i don't want to answer. unfortunately tumblr's numbered lists are silly so theyre incorrectly numbered now https://www.tumblr.com/thuskindlyshescatters/755265757960601600/rwby-ask-game?source=share
Favorite debunked fan theory? Qrowdad no question. I kinda believed it at the time, and the way CRWBY have backed away from it is absolutely hilarious especially if they make poly STR real and Summer/Qrow is one of the only nonromantic relationships on the team. Doubly so if Rosebird Parents comes real.
Rank the soundtracks! 9 >>> 6 > 7 > 4 > 8 > 1 > 2 > 5 >>> 3. i do think v3's is noticeably worse than the others but aside from that and v9 going off there's not much differential for me.
Favorite Ruby ship? HARGH this one has been rapidly changing for me over the last couple months. i love NND and have for a very long time, it might still be my answer, but i've fallen hardcore for gemstones lately too. (artificial gemstones is excellent as well, i think penny/emerald could be really cool.) but i've also gotten very into the idea of post-v9 complicated emotions ruby/neo lately. artificial gemstones if you make me choose.
Pick a design choice for the new outfits! GIVE 👏 RUBY 👏 MORE 👏 BELTS more seriously i'm curious if ruby will have any colors representing those who have fallen. obviously penny is the big one but i also think it would be cool if she has a little rainbow sleeve or somesuch with Summer, Penny, and Pyrrha all represented. Maybe Lionheart, Ozpin, Clover, and Ironwood too, representing the more negative aspects of her guilt. Also Neo
Favorite redhead in the show? Penny.
Favorite lines? "So, when she's ready, I'll be there for her. And, I know we're not as close... but I'm here for you, too." all of Ruby's speeches to Qrow in 6x9 and 6x10 "She'll find herself. One way... or another."
Any characters you wish had lived? Penny, Pyrrha, Roman. that answer hasn't changed since v3 lol.
Any characters you wish had died? honestly, the only characters i wanted to die were adam and jacques, and they're already dead, so...
Favorite soundtrack moments? all the RWBY soundtracks since i got back into the show have released either on my birthday or a few days before and i don't notice them until my birthday. that's been incredible for me, it feels like casey is giving me a present lol.
Favorite visuals/shots? Penny against the moon in V8 i think is the best-looking shot in the show. i also love the moment when the dust clears in blake + yang vs adam, it looks perfect. all of Tea Amidst Terrible Trouble looks amazing, it's the best episode imo. the fight animation in everyone vs ironwood is so smooth and i love it, also crescent rose during the first 10 seconds or so of ruby vs the cat in v9c10. the look ruby gives neo at the end of the fight is really impressive to me too - they managed to animate her expression subtly while giving it as much emotion as a real actor would have. that look says a thousand words of concern and worry and understanding and it's so impressive that they pulled it off.
Best idea for a RWBY crossover? RWBY X Homestuck fighting game. I will sacrifice both Miles Luna and Andrew Hussie to whatever god can make this happen.
Most nostalgic part of Poser animation? i love the way yang's semblance hair looked in the old days. the maya hair is cool too but there's something about how it moved in poser.
Favorite location? visually, the house in TATT. emotionally, RNJRWYOQ's house in mistral still feels so comfy to me, i want everyone to move there at the end of the show.
Theory for the Relic of Choice? it allows you to pinpoint a choice in your life and visualize what would've happened if you'd chosen differently. i don't think it lets you actually go back and change it, though - just take that into account for any future choices.
Theory for the Relic of Destruction? i don't have a serious one but i do think it'd be really funny if it's just like. A Really Good Normal Sword with a spirit that tells you to Kill
Favorite Weiss ship? Bee's Schnees and particularly freezerburn. i'm not much of a fan of bumblebee honestly but freezerburn and monochrome carry bee's schnees hardcore.
What are you looking forward to seeing in Vacuo? Emerald Emerald Emerald i need her character development i need her being awkward with RWBYJ because she doesn't know if they'll continue to accept her
Favorite RWBYxJL character design? imma be honest i didn't like those movies very much. i like jess's design alright.
Characters you want to see redeemed? i would say emerald but she's hopefully not in question at this point. honestly i think all of the villains should get a genuine chance at redemption but my next answer is definitely Neo. my perception of purpose is that, when your purpose is fulfilled and you ascend the normal way (unlike Ruby), your new purpose has to do with bettering your old purpose. whether you had ineffective means or insufficient ends, your target is going to be the same. so i think regardless of whether she comes back as herself or someone else, neo's new purpose will be about ruby. this could be a really cool spin on redemption imo.
Favorite trans character headcanon? urghhh so many characters are so trans in this show. trans ruby is near and dear to my heart though. but trans weiss also kicks ass
What would be your Aura color/color theme? i think it would be pink and green. which one my aura would be idk but they're my two favorite colors and i like how they look together
Favorite voice performance? Lindsay Jones in v9 especially 9x7 through 9x9. they did an incredible job of letting Ruby's emotions pour through and i love how gravelly she got. i've never heard a high-pitched gravelly voice before and it sounds amazing
Favorite opening to sing along to? Trust Love. v7 also has the best intro sequence overall and i will die on this hill
Free space, ask me anything! if you have more questions you wanna hit me with send me asks! i'm always happy to get asked things about my special interests tagging @starlightsaphron @scp-bumblebee. also tagging @yangs-right-arm to be done AFTER she actually watches v9 :p
#greenlight volume 10#smmrofrwby#fndmrtx2024#i'm also gonna tag this#rubyneo#in case any of my followers have actually decided to block that as i told them i'd be consistent with it#oh right lmfao#rwby
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Chipspeech Twitter Archive Update
Hi I should have done this months ago.. I do not know when (or if) I am going to finish that website lmao. So I am just going to share my notes from Google Docs. Should be easier to read than the original posts and helpful as a starting point if anyone else decides to make a website :3
The documents are all on commenting mode so feel free to make comments to bookmark things for yourself or write your thoughts or whatever. Under the cut I have put some formatting notes.
It's a folder, each year of Twitter posts is its own document (I tried to compile them into one but it lagged too much). There is also a document with all of the original Tumblr posts (from the accounts I could find, no tags yet but I will go back and get them eventually, also no dates but they're all from 2015), and one with the bios from the official website for ease of access.
The formatting is a little (a lot) weird and there are probably pictures that need resizing/transcription but I figured it's better to give people access now. The text is small (to keep the page count as low as possible) so you will have to zoom in.
It goes by day, organized with a bulleted list. The top level bullets are each character that tweeted that day. The second level bullets are original tweets/retweets by that character. The third+ level bullets are comment threads under that tweet, the organization here is inconsistent but imo still readable (if you think something needs an edit for clarity let me know and I'll fix it).
For each character's section of the list, normal text is that character's tweets/comments. Italicized text is anyone who is not that character. If it is labeled with unitalicized text, it is that character/important account (e.g. the official Chipspeech account), otherwise it is a fan. I also included some labels and/or clarifying comments for Vocaloid producers I like, they're not central to the story though
I got rid of the line breaks within the tweets when copying them down because it was easier to format. Sorry about that. Idk how to fix it other than going through everything again but it doesn't take away from the story so I'm leaving it for now.
If something came from a website other than Twitter, I tried to provide the link (unless its content was deleted). I did my best to transcribe the Clyp posts that were not deleted.
If something is a text-only retweet, it is marked with [retweet]. If it includes an image, it's probably a screenshot of the whole thing. I only included retweets that felt story-relevant (so no miscellaneous cat pictures, Apple-related aesthetic images, etc.), but if people really want it I can go back and add the rest.
Deleted tweets are noted with [deleted tweet], with the characters they came from if applicable. Idk how Twitter works but it the person in the thread is replying to the username of a certain character, I assumed it was that character's tweet that had been deleted. If something says [deleted Dandy thread], assume there is a deleted Dandy tweet in between each of the listed tweets (or another character, but it's usually Dandy). That was meant to be a temporary time-saver and I've gone back and fixed the ones I've found, but there's probably more I accidentally skipped.
Anything not in English is translated in a comment. Except the X-Sampa (I will fix that sometime but there's not much of it). Also it was done with the built-in Google Translate feature so it may be a little incorrect. Unclear pictures and whatnot also have clarifying comments. I can add more clarifying comments (or image IDs) if anyone needs them.
I tried not to include any unattributed fanart but there are some that I forgot to copy the handle for (I am also fixing these when I find them).
As for any future updates to this folder as a whole, I kind of want to go back through each account's liked tweets to see if there's anything funny in there but idk when that will be. That would probably be its own document.
Honestly I should have given everyone access back in June.. oops. If you have any questions you can put them in a comment on this post (or reach out to me another way, idk). As I mentioned before, feel free to use all of this as a starting point if you're making your own website.
I'll pin this post so it's findable in the future. Also sorry for disappearing for several months (it will happen again).
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Wh-
What the f-
UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HELLO EXCUSE ME WHAT-
Yeah. This is fine. This is great, even! I'm just scrolling around on Tumblr, havin a good time, then I see some asks talking about the new page and I get excited. I riot in my head, even! I squeal with joy because I absolutely adore your art!
Then Sonic pushes Shadow away and my heart breaks in half.
wtf /pos and /lh
I wanna psychoanalyze this so fuccin bad so I'm gonna try my best but everything is so clear and easy to see so idk how obvious this will all be. I'll have a TLDR at the end that will hopefully be shorter idfk
Also before I do that I just wanna say that I absolutely love THOAM and I'm so glad I've been along on such a crazy journey for this long. Love seeing your art evolve throughout the 2 years I've been here!
ok let's get on with it already-
---
Okay so the first thing I noticed is Sonic's demeanor in this entire chapter so far. Sonic wasn't necessarily pissed at Shadow before coming here, (I still fail to remember the name of their location) but he was a bit... He seemed angered to some degree. This obviously has to do with the lack of sleep he's been getting due to his incredibly painful transformation, and uh side note here, transforming on its own would be enough to make someone feel out of sorts. I totally understand why Sonic is acting odd, in this case.
Anyway, the point I'm making is that Shadow has slowly been testing Sonic's patience throughout this and the last chapter. In the last one, Shadow said something incredibly rude and impulsive, which lead to Sonic staying behind in the dorm while Shadow and Chip were getting mawled. He only came back because he knew they were in deep trouble. The hug he got from Shadow didn't really help all that much, even if it was a kind gesture and something the Ultimate Lifeform wouldn't typically do. Because, y'know, it's just a hug. People hug others all the time, and it's not even close to a real apology.
Then Chip stayed behind with Tails. And... Suddenly, Sonic took a complete 180!
Without Chip around, without Sonic's emotional support buddy, the blue blur is left with all these pent up emotions that he's been refusing to let out for a long time. The last time he cried was days ago when he accidentally attacked Amy, and for us, that was probably like 3-4 years ago at this point. He's hardly had enough time or room to really feel anything, and that leaves him all constipated and icky. Sure, he had to kind of mellow his real feelings when Chip was around because he's just a kid in Sonic's eyes, and when Sonic lashes out it impacts Chip in a bad way. This doesn't mean Sonic feels any better without Chip, because without him, there's no hype man to make him feel better. There are no comforting words or small chit-chats for the road and no pit stops to get snacks... It's just him and Shadow now, and since they're on a pretty important mission to, you know, fix the entire fucking world, there's like no time for breaks.
Combine all this with the fact that Sonic is stuck as a Werehog for this entire chapter, and for the entirety of this specific mission... Yeah, you've got a pretty cranky hedgehog. And here's the sad part in all of this: Sonic doesn't like feeling this angry and this alone, but no one seems to really understand him anymore. Not even Shadow. They don't know what it's like living two whole lives at once, having to go through all this pain and agony for so long and not able to tell a soul. They couldn't possibly comprehend!
So how should he feel when his closest companion makes an effort to understand, even just by a little bit?
---
TL;DR
Sonic is confused and angry at the world. He doesn't understand what to do or how to act, and without Chip's support and unintentional therapy, he's just kinda... Left to his thoughts. Shadow suddenly trying to help after being not very helpful for a while made things even more confusing, and the fact Shadow never told Sonic about the constant nighttime thing... Yeeeeeaaahhh, Sonic's not doing too hot.
Hope this wasn't too long and I hope Tumblr doesn't eat this up due to its length. Thanks so much for reading to the end and thanks for just being you. Because if you didn't exist the world would explode-
<3
NEVER TOO LONG i think others also appreciate the theories ♥
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what are you top 5 fave nurseydex fics you've read? (a girl is needing recs)
oh yay!!! first of all i have to admit that over the years i've dipped in and out of omgcp tumblr and therefore have been very bad at staying up to date, so most of these are quite old. they are my favourites for a reason, however! also i did 6 not 5 lol <3
to be alone with you by @alocalband Will and Derek spend their junior year learning how to live together, learning how to be friends, and, eventually, figuring out that they'd like to be more.
i actually only read this fic recently, but it’s instantly one of my new faves. it is SO well written, the characterisations of every single character are perfect, and the story is so beautiful. i’ve reread it a few times already!
in so many words also by alocalband Derek writes a short story. That's his first mistake. His second is getting it published.
idk why but i absolutely live for fics where everyone on the outside knows what nursey and dex are up to except for them, and this one is really good at it. the ‘derek “nursey” nurse is unchill’ tag is very accurate in this case.
in front of the same small bathroom mirror by @geniusorinsanity It's not surprising that sharing a room changes things, but neither of them expect the most important conversations in their strange, awkward friendship to happen in their shared bathroom. (Or: five conversations Dex and Nursey have in a shared bathroom, and one in bed.)
i absolutely adore this story. dex and nursey learning to coexist and care for each other is so special to me and this fic captures it perfectly. honestly, anything by shelly is going to be a must-read, but this one is really really wonderful.
it drops with the gravity of rain also by geniusorinsanity It happens like this: “I don’t--this is a bad idea,” Dex says, his lips still tingling, his hands shaking on Nursey’s hips where he’s shoved him away. “This is a really bad idea, Nurse. I can’t--We can’t do this.” And there’s hurt in Nursey’s eyes and his bottom lip is swollen from Dex’s teeth, but he says, “Okay.” And then, “It’s chill, Dex. Just friends, then.” It happens like this: “Actually,” Nursey says, talking more to his granola than to them, “I kind of have a date.” It happens like this: When Nursey calls, Dex almost doesn’t pick up the phone.
another wonderful fic by shelly - i reread this one all the time. it’s such a lovely character study of dex and it tackles the subject matter so well. content warnings in the end notes.
things you said by @quidhitch / @maangoes “Awww, looks like Dex appreciates a lady in uniform,” Nursey teases, tucking his feet a little further beneath Dex’s thighs. “You have a thing with the head cheerleader back in high school Dexy? Hold her pom poms and kiss her whatnot?” Dex seems to be contemplating something, and Nursey figures it’s one of his lame clapbacks like your mom’s a pom pom. He brings the bottle to his mouth, smiling around the lip of it. “Actually, I’m more of a captain of the football team kinda guy.” Nursey chokes on his beer.
i always come back to this one. it’s just so sweet and funny. i remember reading it years ago and it has stuck with me all this time.
today the sun comes in by @playedwright Will looks beautiful, Derek thinks, and it isn’t fair. Time has done nothing to lessen the extent of his feelings, either. Derek realizes a little too late exactly why he was nervous. It has been four years, three months, and five days since they graduated from Samwell, and Derek is finally facing the undeniable fact that at some time during his college years, he fell in love with William J. Poindexter and never got around to falling out of it.
this is one of those special fics that stays with you. i have never been to seattle, but this story made me homesick for the city. mars is such a gorgeous writer and this fic is a perfect example of it! (also i miss u mars!!!)
this was fun, i've missed reccing fics! i hope i could be useful! maybe i'll do some more recent ones if I manage to keep up to date with the nurseydex tag <3
#i love fics u guys everyone in this fandom is so talented#answers#kimikofrenchie#nurseydex#nurseydex fic rec
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hey there! you don't have to answer this right away, i simply want to wish you a happy hiatus! hope that you're having fun, thank you for the kinktober writing effort.
hey love! i find myself using tumblr more and more as the days go on. is it really a hiatus if it doesn't last even a week? am i back from hiatus now? who knows :D...
sometimes i just get so overwhelmed with being social. i will somewhat regularly just stop using discord and ignore my friends for a couple days or so because i can't keep up with things.
my OCD has been terrible recently, too. i'm stuck in a cycle of: thinks about bad thing, can't stop thinking about bad thing, so i must be inherently bad. i've suffered from intrusive thoughts since high school, and for the most part they don't affect me too strongly; like i know that it's just OCD. but i've been really immobilized by them recently, a consistent couple of panic attacks a day where i can't breathe because i feel like im literally the most evil person on the planet x
and i don't say this for pity or to vent!! idk, i think it's nice to show you guys that im not all that cool B-)... i suffer, too. you're not alone and such.
i've been enjoying playing 7 Days To Die with my partner, and watching my brother play the silent hill remake! i've also became popular on es and have started hosting giveaways and such over there! i've contacted a new therapist to see if she can help me relax lmfao...
thank you forever n ever for the love and support !! sending you lots of love, always. <3
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LADS I'M BACK AGAIN! Kind of! My nerves are fucked again! c': (personal ramblings ahead)
I had a big three weeks since like mid-June till early July So first I went to this hardcore fest I mentioned last month, and it was fine, but I found that fests aren't really for me. I'm glad I went because now I know. I guess I may attend again but buy only one-day ticket in the future but idk if I'll want to honestly, maybe only if some band I really like would play. Guess the only fest I'm still interested in is K-Town but that'd be different coz I would be sleeping at my friend's house in a town nearby, so at least I'd get some *peace and quiet* far away from people and only come to the fest for the bands. But yea, it was kind of overwhelming and uncomfortable. Completely unlike venue gigs, which feel intimate and comfortable and make me feel very present and like I'm a part of this scene. Fest was just chaotic, and since there was no breaks in-between sets I feel like all bands blent into one, I literally don't feel like I made any memories beside discomfort. And also almost everyone was drunk, which of course was to be expected and I know that getting wasted is the point of fests for many people and it's fine, but just not a space for me and it definitely contributed to the discomfort; I'm really glad my friend who was there with me also doesn't drink alcohol. But I got cassettes and a vinyl from bands and distros so that's nice!!
Then after I came back, I only had 3 days before leaving again to visit my best friend to go to some Pride events, a Xiao & Speedway gig and a bonfire on which I was supposed to play mandolin. Pride was nice as usual, I think I looked pretty faggy at the main parade but I'm def getting some chained harness for the next year, I'm brave enough for that by now lmao But neither the gig or the bonfire happened!!! :/ The gig was cancelled like 3 hours before it was supposed to happen coz bands' plane was delayed. And bonfire didn't happen coz one person couldn't attend and I couldn't play mando coz my fucking...... nerve issues in the right arm came back...... But it was still great, I love my best friend, we had such a lovely time, love just spending time with them!! Heals my accumulated mental damage lmao
And since I came back I've been waiting for my nerves to heal, not doing much, which is very annoying coz I got only like, 3 months since the last time I couldn't use my hand. It's really difficult to accept new disabilities, especially when they're still pretty new and you don't know what you can and can't do yet. But I guess I know a bit better now. Definitely can't spend a few days in a row writing down the chords and playing an instrument, definitely can't do any strength-based activities like lifting heavy objects multiple times a day or doing push-ups and I definitely need a longer stick for my aro flag so I don't have to raise my hands at all!
Honestly I'm still pretty upset about the gig not happening coz like I said, the fest just blurred into one, so I feel like I haven't been at any actual show this summer! (and also I REALLY wanted to see Xiao) Thank fuck Frail Body plays here at the beginning of August coz I wouldn't go at any gig before October otherwise!! But it sucks to live in the middle of nowhere, having to travel 2 to 4 hours to see a gig, pay a lot of fucking money for the train tickets and having to always figure out the place to sleep coz no trains go back to my county from the cities past like, 19:30 lmao
But anyway, guess I can try to come back on tumblr again, I miss my blog!! My hand is still doing bad, it'll probably take at least one month till it's fine again. I hope only a month!
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9/15 - 9/21/24
I am still working in all the same Renji 11 scenes as last week, having finished none and studiously continued to avoid the 0.5 scene. The closing Renji+Rukia scene somehow now also includes more Kensei and Hisagi and Rose than I'd anticipated, which kind of!! makes me want to drop Renji off a cliff!!!
But I'm getting fairly adept at taking very un-meditative snatches of time and just working with that--like, set a timer, 10 minutes, go. I STILL WOULD LIKE LONGER BLOCKS OF TIME, DON'T GET ME WRONG. I'd also love not to work 7 days a week, but reality being what it is, training myself to write in these 10-minute sprints is the next-best-thing that I need to be able to do. I've been doing them for a bunch of random things (in an attempt to combat simply never doing them, ever) and ending my days with a bunch of 10-minute sprints, but usually they're things that are much less intensive/experiential than writing.
For context, I have a spreadsheet with 5 goal categories for the week (3 work, 2 personal). Within these, there are three achievement tiers--a bare minimum goal (usually defined by time spent), a realistic goal, and a reach goal. (Blue = time attempted but not met; green = achieved; yellow = no attempt.) Below these there's a life/chore/fun bank split into weekly/monthly/quarterly/semi-annual tasks, which is where the 10-minute sprints originated. So it's like, 10 minutes on scheduling! Meal planning! Banking! Vacuuming! Tidying! Dishes! Reading! Reading fanfic! Tumblr!
My writing goals for this week went like this:
The blue fills are successful 10ish-minute sprints that I probably wouldn't have bothered to try if I hadn't successfully practiced them easier things. Victories!! Even if technically that is a picture of me not meeting my minimum goal 4 out of 6 days, I still feel pretty good about that, and about how the writing is going, process-wise.
To facilitate the 10-minute writing sprints, I've also just kind of given up and am writing fanfic on my work computer now, lol. And while I've never really been an effective user of the multiple-desktops feature, I do think it helps get me quickly into fanfic mode. I'm a big fan of these random default trees I picked out for the wallpaper, because the perspective shift/aerial view really makes me feel like I've flown away from work and am now someplace distinctly separate (somewhere in the Forests of Rukongai):
idk guys I just really like these random default trees <3 I love feeling like opening my fanfic doc is like swooping down into them. 🥺🥺
My goal for next week is to keep my streak of daily 10-minute sprints minimum, and ideally actually meet my stated minimum goal every day, instead. There's a decent chance this will be possible because as far as I know I don't have any extraneous obligations beyond the usual, except for Thursday. Could I finish Renji 11? Let's goooooo!
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Wait I wanna know more about the guy who fucked up, if you feel comfortable of course
Do we need to bring our pitchforks or just hate mail ⚔️
wait i'm actually... ksjdksad i don't like talking about someone like that, but i do need to vent, if that's okay? jkdshkasf i've been bottling it up and only talked about it properly to my mom and dad :'')
the first few weeks, he was really sweet? like he'd buy me gifts and compliment me and tell me how much he admired my personality. i think he's not a bad person per se, but he's extremely old-fashioned and narrow-minded.
i saw the first red flag when he called me and ended up speaking about marriage. which is okay, you know. like, i'm alright with being open right from the beginning. but that convo brought in a few very strange happenings in the following few weeks, which included but aren't limited to
him asking, "you're not one of those girls who'd wanna wait for years after marriage before having children, right?".. i tell him, well yes, i am. do you want kids right away or? and he says.. "9 months isn't right away." ok.
him saying he's too lazy to clean his apartment, and "how about i pick you up, bring you here, go away for the weekend and when i come back, you'll have it all cleaned!"
him offending my entire occupation that i studied for for years, because he had a bad experience with people in that department. i understand, but i did tell him not all of us are the same, and he said "idc, they don't deserve any respect", which essentially means that i don't either.
him looking at me weird when i said that tom holland's lip sync battle is one of my all-time-favourite videos on yt and then telling me, "but it's gay af." and just generally not being a fan of the lgbtiqa+ community.
him saying that once he's a dad, he'll be strict and not allow his kids to do anything. he just? talked about having kids a lot? even told me, when i almost choked on smoking hot food, "don't die, i still need like 3 kids from you"
and what made me abandon him for good: i asked him why he's always so excited about marriage, which is okay, but just wanna know! he says people usually want to get married bc they love their partner, but idk why... for me it's cos i want kids. in that case, i noticed he wasn't there for me, but just bc i'm fertile (or so i hope)
that day, i said he should want a girl for more than that. he said, "i know, after all you're not a child factory". i tell him yup that's right... and he proceeds to joke, as he called all his offensive shit, "but you could be." and that's where i bid him goodbye.
there goes. i was in a strange mood after that? i think i even dipped from tumblr for a moment. my parents were a bit worried, but then i realised that i felt a lot better without him. god i'm not ready for relationships lmao, but i won't fight love. when it happens, it happens... so fingers crossed for something better <3
#tw sexism & homophobia#this was a huge ramble lmfao i apologise 💀#lolll no hate mail tho it's okay 😭#might delete later but had to get it off my chest :') ty for asking bby <3#notes for rid 🌹#anon
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