#so I’m eating bread and thinking about the pizza I’m going to order on the way home

[hyperfocusthusly]

So it turns out that a Ceilidh with a Greek Mezze buffet is what Hell will look like for me

[hyperballart]

taking aphrodisiacs with patrick as a joke…

being at his place and both of you being bored out of your minds. you’ve been hanging out with him for a couple months since he came up to you one day after class asking for notes. now youre on his couch half listening to a movie he put on the dvd player while eating the remnants of the pizza you ordered. you turn to him, “i need something sweet, got anything here?” he murmurs something about you looking through his pantry and you get up, dusting off small crumbs of bread from your skirt. as you’re rummaging through all the junk stored in there, you miraculously spot a bag of kit kats on the top shelf. you’re about to call patrick to help you reach for it when a sudden tug of your fingers is enough to bring it to the floor. you curse and pick it up but next to the bag you find a few chocolate bars from a brand you’ve never heard of.

you pick them up and examine the black packaging with gold detailing and read the contents in the back. you come to the realization that you’ve found your friend’s stash of sex chocolate edibles. you hold them behind your back and walk in front of him with a shit-eating grin. he looks up to you annoyed, “what? do you mind? you’re blocking the tv.” you pull out the boxes and giggle, “why do you have these?”

you see him slightly blushing and stutter something out about them actually belonging to his roommate and telling you to put them back. you don’t listen, instead suggest something that you’ll probably regret later.

you don’t know why or how exactly everything came to be, but now youre both giggling and surrounded by all four empty chocolate boxes on the couch. it’s been about forty minutes and you feel a bit airy, patrick no doubt does as well. the previously neglected movie suddenly becoming hilarious as you’re both fighting tears and holding your stomachs. you come to the realization that you haven’t yet checked how legitimate those treats were so you ask your friend, “how are you? like, do you feel anything? i’m not sure these did their job.” he turns to you as his laughing dies down, “god i’m so fucking hard right now,” he leans his had back and keeps eye contact and brings a hand down to cup himself through his sweats, “it’s been like this for a bit—mm fuck,” your eyes are growing lidded and your starting to notice the effect on you as well.

for about thirty seconds, you look between his face and where his hand is softly petting his dick through his clothes, his mouth parts a bit and he’s quietly panting when he reaches down and squeezes his tip. he notices how unusual it is and quickly mutters a sorry, i’m a little high before picking his hand back up but you stop him. your own palm reaches out to touch him and he’s dragging it under his sweats and letting out a shaky sigh when you touch him bare. he’s hard, harder than you’ve ever felt a man and you almost feel bad. how long has he been like this? you pull him out and he fucking moans in your ear, his tip is steadily leaking and he won’t stop throbbing. “oh my god, yeah—touch me please”

you don’t think you’ve ever been so turned on in your life, you let him know this and hes quickly begging you to sink down on his cock—“c’mon baby, sit on it,” he roughly handles you to straddle him, “cum on me, i need it” your panties are still on but you’ve soaked right through them, they’re basically transparent and the feel of patrick desperately humping your cunt through them is enough to bring you to an orgasm within a minute. “oh holy fuck, yeah—“ patrick is shaking under you, he’s trying to push you down harder on him and he looks like he’s about to cry.

you don’t even need to hold him, he’s hard as steel, but you do anyway. you press him at your entrance through your panties and he squirms, pushing his hips further so they poke at your covered entrance, wanting to get inside you. both of your eyes roll back at the sensation, and you’re starting to drool. you keep going until he groans a shit, i’m coming on you and you decide you need more.

he’s coming back slowly, and you’re lifting up your skirt to reveal where you’re both connected. he glances down and the sight is enough to be engraved in his brain forever, he’ll jerk off to this memory until he fucking dies. your white cotton panties are soaked and soiled, they cling to your pussy and outline your lips in a way that makes patrick twitch under you. his cum is still dripping from your pussy and your thighs keep twitching, he can’t wait anymore.

he groans—almost angrily—and in one moment, he has your panties pulled to the side and pushes up into you in a single thrust. both of you release disgustingly obscene sounds at the relief and there’s no time before you’re fucking each other like rabbits. he’s in your ear, “you’re getting everything wet, messy fucking girl,” he moans when you clench down on him hard, “that’s it, milk this fucking cock, i’m gonna come in you—that’s what you want.” he doesn’t phrase it as a question, he knows you do.

after a couple minutes he’s doing just that, and you follow right after. even as you’re spent, laid down next to him, you still ache and he’s still hard. you don’t even wait until his cum stops dripping out of you until you’re going at it again. and again, and again.

art is gonna be pissed when he comes home and sees you two got into his stash.

[thewosoway]

Give up Luce // Lucy bronze x reader

If there was one way you could describe Lucy bronze it would be that shes determined. Lucy gets what she wants and no one can tell her no. Except for you. Lucy would move the earth for you if u told her to. She was smitten. There was one problem, you said no.

There was no way on this earth that you would go out with a teammate. Lucy wanted to change that. She was very determined to get you to say yes to a date. For the past 3 months Lucy had asked you every single day to go on a date with her.

“Lucia Roberta I’m saying this for the last time. No. I won’t go on a date with you.” It was funny at this point and all your teammates knew it, they made jokes and laughed about it to themselves. Lucy just wouldn’t accept no for an answer.

She followed you around at training like a lost puppy. Continuing to ask you out, each time the answer was no. Lucy refused to believe that you weren’t interested.

So a few days after the last time she asked you when you were next at training you agreed to be her partner and eventually when she asked you to go on a date with her you agreed. “If I say yes will you give up Luce” she nodded and smiled “if that’s what you want” you were going on that date just to shut her up. Well that’s what you thought was going to happen.

A few days later there was Lucy outside your apartment with a bouquet of flowers, tulips to be precise, smiling dressed in her best outfit. “Claudia and patri said you liked tulips so I got them for you. They said you weren’t a roses kind of girl so I had to get the ones you liked” she handed them to you “ oh lucy they’re beautiful thank you” her eyes lit up as you took the flowers and kissed her on the cheek.

Putting the tulips in a vase with water before grabbing your bag and walking out with Lucy to whatever location she had chosen for you both.

When you got there it turned out to be a small restaurant down one of the back roads of Barcelona. Simple but cute. The food looked delicious and you were so excited to try it.“Order what u want, it’s on me” Lucy smiled and took u to a small table with a tag that said miss Lucy. “Lucy I can pay for myself” she shakes her head No and hands you a menu.

You order some kind of pasta with cheese sauce and garlic bread while Lucy orders pizza and breadsticks complete with a bottle of white wine to share between you.

After eating and having a little to drink while talking you and Lucy took a walk along the beach and went around the little shops that were still open. “Lucy this was so lovely”

She just smiles as you start to walk back to ur apartment. Something about being with Lucy feels right but you can’t think of what it actually means. You enjoy being with her but you can’t figure out weather you want to be with her or not.

When you get to your apartment you invite Lucy in and have a few drinks which ends up with both of you sleeping in the living room but not before the question lucy has been waiting to ask.

“Would you wanna go out again, maybe as girlfriends?”

“ I’ll have to think about that Luce” you give her a cheeky smile and she shakes her head

Maybe things will be ok with Lucy… maybe you could be together

——————————————————————

This might be part one of a few. Let me know what you think and anything you want me to write x

[daydreamingyuta]

congrats on 300 followers, it’s so deserved :D could you do 1, 6, and 21 for Chenle?

Hidden Feelings | Chenle

summary: bestfriend!chenle was in love with you, even though he's never admitted that to you. however, after another bad date that left you crying in his arms, he decides to confess his feelings. wc: 788 genre: fluff, bestfriend!chenle prompts: 1.) "I couldn't be more in love with you." & 6.) "are you flirting with me?" & 21.) best friends to lovers a/n: thank you!! <3 and thank you sm for requesting, I really enjoyed writing it and I hope you enjoy reading it!! :)

It really was no secret as to how Chenle felt about you. Or to be more precise, it was clear to everyone but you, how Chenle felt about you. It wasn’t your fault though, you couldn’t help the fact that you were oblivious to his subtle hints and flirtatious remarks. Honestly, if it was anyone's fault, it was Chenle’s. After years of being his best friend, you had been the subject of countless jokes and teases from him, so it was almost impossible to tell the difference between a joke and him being for real.

Because you weren’t aware of how he felt about you, you found yourself seeking love from men that simply weren’t worth your time. Tonight was no exception. You didn’t even bother texting Chenle that you were on the way over to his place, he was already expecting you since you had told him earlier that you were going out on a date. 

This has been your routine for a while now. Go out on a date, find out that he’s horrible, and then go to Chenle’s place for comfort. Of course, not every date was bad, but most were and you hated that.

“Did you even get to eat anything before you left this time?” Chenle asks, opening up his door for you.

“Three pieces of bread. I didn’t even get to the main course, Chenle.” You say, as you place your purse on his kitchen table. 

“I already ordered us some pizza, it’s on the way.”

“Thank you, Chenle.” You say, coming to a hug, resting your head on his chest. “Why do I always end up with these kinds of guys?” You say, your voice muffled because you're speaking into his shirt.

Chenle rubs your back while you’re still in the hug for a little while. He can’t help but feel saddened every time he has to see you like this. A part of him is selfishly glad that you haven’t found anyone yet, while another part of him is angry that these guys can’t see how much of an amazing person you are.

“Why don’t you stop seeing guys like that and be my girl? Then you wouldn’t have to come to me crying ever again.” He says, with humor in his tone trying to soften the mood. 

“Are you flirting with me?” You say, lifting your head up from out of his chest so you can look at him. The tears were coming to a stop, but you knew you still looked like a mess. If it was anyone else, you would have kept your face hidden, you only let Chenle see you like this.

“Hm.” He hums. He doesn’t give you a straight answer, he never does. He tucks your hair behind your ear and he’s looking at you like you’ve never seen him look at you before. Little did you know, he always looked at you with loving eyes, he just never allowed you to see.

You weren’t expecting it, but he gently grabs your face. He first presses a kiss on your left cheek and then on the right, effectively wiping away your tears. He then presses the softest kiss on your forehead before he rests his forehead against yours. 

“You’re questioning if I’m flirting with you?” He says in a whisper as he closes his eyes. “If you only knew how I felt about you, y/n. If you only knew how badly seeing you like this hurts my heart.”

“How do you feel about me, Chenle?” You say, matching his whispering voice.

“Y/n…I couldn’t be more in love with you.” 

You push away from him slightly after hearing his words. “Chenle, don’t you dare say that just to make me feel better.”

“You think that’s what I’m doing? You think I would say anything like that to you if I didn’t mean it?”

You knew the answer before he even finished the question. He isn’t the type to lie about something like this. The realization that he’s telling you the truth hits you hard. To tell the truth, you’ve never allowed yourself to look at Chenle in a romantic way. You fought against your heart for years because you knew that once you started liking him, there would be no going back. Nobody treated you like he did. Even just being his best friend, he made you feel so beautiful every day. 

You look up at him with a soft smile, feeling like a huge weight has been lifted off your shoulders, a weight that you didn’t even know was there. It was such a relief, knowing that you didn’t have to fight against what your heart has really wanted this whole time.

[blarefordaglare]

this post used to be linked universe memes but because I don’t know where I got it from and want to give credit from now on instead I’ll just put a cr*cliff I made

TW: None, unless tying people to chairs is considered a crime?

“I’m not cooking tonight.” The familiar voice of the champion rang through the camp, “I swear if I cook fish one more night in a row I will turn into a cod.”

Normally, a refusal to cook, from the designated cook, would send alarm bells through the chain. But he had a point. This would mark the 17th night they ate fish (Yay, thanks Wind), and honestly, everyone was getting sick of it, even the sailor himself. 

“Ho-Kay then, so what are we going to eat?”

“Have you guys been to a restaurant before?” 

…

This is when chaos ensues.

“Okay, so you are a party of nine?” A waitress stood in front of the chain. 9 heroes, in probably the worst attire to wear for a fancy restaurant, standing right before her.

Time quickly stepped in, “Yes, nine. Five adults and four children.” That earned him a very aggressive poke on the shoulder.

“Old man, I’m over one hundred years old, I think a hundred and seventeen is over eighteen years of age.” 

“Oh hush you, this bill is already gonna be expensive, plus judging by how you literally ATE a rock the other day, I think we can subtract a century.” 

“Just shut up you both. I am famished.” The pink haired boy let out a dramatic sigh. He just wanted his food.

“Drama Queen.”

All settled around a booth, at the ripe time of 19:17, the boys and men were ready to eat most definitely. 

“Sailor, don’t fill up on bread.” The captain mentioned, slyly moving the bread basket away from the teenager. 

“Oh-ohm-ohn, Imf a owin oy!” The sailor retaliated (or so that’s what it sounded like anyway, you can’t really tell when someone’s mouth is full.)

“Um, ma’am? I think we’re ready to order.” Twilight spoke up. He was stuck between Legend and Warriors, making sure that they don’t beat each other up. Not sure how he got into the beautiful position of family therapist, but it’s whatever.

“Time?”

“Yes Sky?”

“What’s a medium rare?”

“Oh it’s when the meat is only partially cooked!”

“Okay, miss? May I please have a medium rare chicken?” The innocent boy asked. Legend stifled a laugh, and Hyrule looked a little bit shocked.

“Um… I’ll see what I can do, and you sir?”

“I’ll take… actually I’m full!” Wind replied. He could have sworn he heard someone mumble ‘called it.’ But didn’t say anything.

“Oh okay, what about you?” She looked over at Four, who looked deep in thought.

“I’ll have the stuffed bell peppers, but WHATEVER YOU DO… do not use the green bell peppers… or someone is going to get hurt.” Maybe threatening wasn’t the best idea, but then again it’s also a complete valid reason if you are completely afraid of green bell peppers… according to Four and only Four.

“Mhm… got it? And you?”

“Okay lady, listen up. I would like some pizza, but without the crust, and hold off on the cheese.” Legend earned himself a flick from Twilight, “…Please.”

“So… just sauce?”

“Whatever you call it.”

“May I please have the fried wild greens?” Twilight *politely* asked.

“Of course! What about you?” Her eyes fell on Warriors. 

“Do you have any dates?”

“No sir, this is a restaurant.”

“Well, would you like to orange a date?” The waitress’s cheeks flushed, before she quickly moved on to the next Link. 

“Quick question, is the water that you have drinkable?” Hyrule asked, eying his glass. The waitress slowly nodded her head in confusion. “Alright, then I’ll eat a red potion.”

“I’m just going to completely ignore that request, as I have no idea what a red potion is.”

“I’ll have the steak, if it’s no trouble.” Time politely requested. Aside from Twilight, he was basically the only one with a sensible dish. 

“Of course and what about… you?” The waitress looked down to where wild was supposed to be sitting, but somehow he was not there.

“Okay who kidnapped our archer?” Legend bluntly asked. 

“Give me a minute,” Time stood up, “I know where he is.”

…

“Wild!”

“Okay, and then you see this is how you fry-“

“WILD!”

The champion almost dropped the pan from the harshness of the old man’s voice, “What?!”

“Tell me why you are in the kitchen that says EMPLOYEES ONLY??”

“Because! They weren’t cooking it right. I’m teaching them.”

“Champion, tying people to chairs and forcing them to watch you cook isn’t ‘teaching’.”

“Oops”

“What are you making anyway?”

“Fish.”

[seaside-writings]

Hello, again all you wonderfully, wicked people!

As we know black cats are an essential part of the spooky season as well as an essential part of everyday life! So in honor of that, I made a prompt list dedicated to one of my favorite black cats Salem Saberhagen, who in my opinion had some of the most iconic dialogue in TV history!

I hope you all like this prompt list, and I hope it helps you create! And if you do use it, please credit/tag me so I can check out what you've made!

I hope you all stay blessed and safe throughout your day.

Lots of Love & Wishes: Celia 🖤🎃🕸🔮

P.s. I did change some of the dialogue so it would flow easier when it came to writing for different types of characters.

“You’re the only one who understands me,” “Yeah, but it doesn’t mean I care,” - “What are you doing?” “Nothing!” “You’re in a chatroom again pretending to be a woman, aren’t you?” “I like the attention.” - “I have lighted the fuse. Now I just have to wait for the kapowie! Muahahaha!” - “I'm sorry. I didn't want to hurt you; I just wanted to rule you,” - “You’ll be able to look back on all of this and get revenge,” - “Show me the tuna!” - "I never cared for the name Mildred," - “And let’s give a big warm welcome to sadness,” - “Someone’s gonna end up crying. Probably me,” - “Finally, someone whose life is more pathetic than mine!” - “You don't have to order me a pizza, but make it half sausage, half clam,” - “I need a little fresh air and a latte,”

“As long as you drop everything and stay focused on me, I should be fine,” - “Dogs guard. Cats watch and judge,” - “When I’m happy, I eat! When I’m upset, I eat!” - “Hooray, the toast is stuck! Danger, here I come!” - “They left behind. Be strong. Don’t cry,” - “Still want to take over the world?" - "Cheetos should be served at room temperature, you know,” - “Curse my sarcastic nature!” - “If you misbehave for just one instant, I’ll cut you, man,” - “Dear lord, you picked up a guy at the bus station,” - “It's the 90s, no one eats mortals anymore,” - “I’m rich! Rich, I tell you!” It’s only a few hundred dollars,” “I’m well-off! Well-off, I tell you!” - “Let's destroy everything that's dear to him. Let's indoctrinate him into the cathedral of agony,” “I'm going to write him a very stern letter,” “You're a regular Mad Max, aren't you?” - “A tassel! Don’t you toy with me, you saucy minx!” - “Wow, you must feel like a huge loser,” - “Would you be terribly upset if I threw up in one of your shoes?” - “You laugh, you die,” - “I will not be ignored!” - “All I’ve done all day is eat, sleep, and stare off into space. What an awful existence,” “Hey! I don’t dump on your lifestyle," - “Could you either remove the bandages or kill me?” - “Sorry, thirty waffles is my limit,” - “You think a mirrored ceiling would be too much?” - “Why didn’t you stop them!?” “I was busy,” “Doing what!?” “Playing with my scrunchie,” - “We need a plan,” “How about we weep uncontrollably,” - “I urge you to accept me as your ruler!” - “I’ll be having a quiet weekend, curled up with Memoirs Of A Geisha,” - “Delivery. I want a pizza as fast as possible! And don’t forget the crazy bread!” - “And your face is a bit of a trainwreck too,” - “Tell Elton John he can’t start singing now,” - “I wasn’t always the stud muffin I am today,”

“You owe her an apology. Now! “I’m thinking of how to word it,” “Try 'I’m sorry,'” “Somehow, that just doesn’t feel right…” - “I’d rather be locked in the dishwasher again,” - “Does she know who you are?” “Why does everyone think that’s a necessary part of love,” - “I’m the ultimate bad example,” - “Don’t ask me, I was an English major,” - “Hey, leave the sarcasm to the professionals,” - “Get a real job. And some pants,” - “I’m a cat, I’m curious, so kill me,” - “Still want to take over the world?” “Yes! Wait, no! I meant no!” - “I’d be more nervous if I weren’t so good-looking,” - “Hey chicks, what’s the haps?” - “I’m trying to set the world record for grooving,” - “Sometimes I just like to hear myself talk,” - “You know me any excuse to wear taffeta,” - “Oh, right, I forgot. I’m an animal, I have no self-control,” - “Why am I finding it hard to summon sympathy?” - “Wow, I love a woman who can take charge!” - “I’ll be downstairs creating a distraction,” - “I’m trying to concentrate on expanding my intellectual horizons,” - “Wake up, woman! You’re not a princess, you’re a dragon!” - “Her new obsession is doing wonders for my wardrobe!” - “Please hurry! I’ve been in here for over an hour!” “Why didn’t you call us sooner?” “It wasn’t a problem until I ran out of peanut brittle!” - “So it's true. Taste does skip a generation,” - “I want to say something wise and wonderful right now, but I can't think of anything. Except I love you, and I hope the band knows some Ohio Player,” - “BOO!” “You look ridiculous,” “You were terrified, and you know it,” - “Halloween. Is it just another date on the calendar, or is a state of mind, or is a state of… being?”

[kikker-oma]

umm I’m feeling cr*ckfic time (censoring cuz don’t do drugs kids) that isn’t even lore accurate sooooOoOoo

and yes I made this when I should be sleeping lol

“I’m not cooking tonight.” The familiar voice of the champion rang through the camp, “I swear if I cook fish one more night in a row I will turn into a cod.”

Normally, a refusal to cook, from the designated cook, would send alarm bells through the chain. But he had a point. This would mark the 17th night they ate fish (Yay, thanks Wind), and honestly, everyone was getting sick of it, even the sailor himself. 

“Ho-Kay then, so what are we going to eat?”

“Have you guys been to a restaurant before?” 

…

This is when chaos ensues.

“Okay, so you are a party of nine?” A waitress stood in front of the chain. 9 heroes, in probably the worst attire to wear for a fancy restaurant, standing right before her.

Time quickly stepped in, “Yes, nine. Five adults and four children.” That earned him a very aggressive poke on the shoulder.

“Old man, I’m over one hundred years old, I think a hundred and seventeen is over eighteen years of age.” 

“Oh hush you, this bill is already gonna be expensive, plus judging by how you literally ATE a rock the other day, I think we can subtract a century.” 

“Just shut up you both. I am famished.” The pink haired boy let out a dramatic sigh. He just wanted his food.

“Drama Queen.”

All settled around a booth, at the ripe time of 19:17, the boys and men were ready to eat most definitely. 

“Sailor, don’t fill up on bread.” The captain mentioned, slyly moving the bread basket away from the teenager. 

“Oh-ohm-ohn, Imf a owin oy!” The sailor retaliated (or so that’s what it sounded like anyway, you can’t really tell when someone’s mouth is full.)

“Um, ma’am? I think we’re ready to order.” Twilight spoke up. He was stuck between Legend and Warriors, making sure that they don’t beat each other up. Not sure how he got into the beautiful position of family therapist, but it’s whatever.

“Time?”

“Yes Sky?”

“What’s a medium rare?”

“Oh it’s when the meat is only partially cooked!”

“Okay, miss? May I please have a medium rare chicken?” The innocent boy asked. Legend stifled a laugh, and Hyrule looked a little bit shocked.

“Um… I’ll see what I can do, and you sir?”

“I’ll take… actually I’m full!” Wind replied. He could have sworn he heard someone mumble ‘called it.’ But didn’t say anything.

“Oh okay, what about you?” She looked over at Four, who looked deep in thought.

“I’ll have the stuffed bell peppers, but WHATEVER YOU DO… do not use the green bell peppers… or someone is going to get hurt.” Maybe threatening wasn’t the best idea, but then again it’s also a complete valid reason if you are completely afraid of green bell peppers… according to Four and only Four.

“Mhm… got it? And you?”

“Okay lady, listen up. I would like some pizza, but without the crust, and hold off on the cheese.” Legend earned himself a flick from Twilight, “…Please.”

“So… just sauce?”

“Whatever you call it.”

“May I please have the fried wild greens?” Twilight *politely* asked.

“Of course! What about you?” Her eyes fell on Warriors. 

“Do you have any dried fruit?”

“No sir, this is a restaurant.”

“Well, would you like to orange a date?” The waitress’s cheeks flushed, before she quickly moved on to the next Link. 

“Quick question, is the water that you have drinkable?” Hyrule asked, eying his glass. The waitress slowly nodded her head in confusion. “Alright, then I’ll eat a red potion.”

“I’m just going to completely ignore that request, as I have no idea what a red potion is.”

“I’ll have the steak, if it’s no trouble.” Time politely requested. Aside from Twilight, he was basically the only one with a sensible dish. 

“Of course and what about… you?” The waitress looked down to where wild was supposed to be sitting, but somehow he was not there.

“Okay who kidnapped our archer?” Legend bluntly asked. 

“Give me a minute,” Time stood up, “I know where he is.”

…

“Wild!”

“Okay, and then you see this is how you fry-“

“WILD!”

The champion almost dropped the pan from the harshness of the old man’s voice, “What?!”

“Tell me why you are in the kitchen that says EMPLOYEES ONLY??”

“Because! They weren’t cooking it right. I’m teaching them.”

“Champion, tying people to chairs and forcing them to watch you cook isn’t ‘teaching’.”

“Oops”

“What are you making anyway?”

“Fish.”

HAHA I adore the idea of the chain going to a restaurant and being absolutely weird about it hahaha

Wild teaching the kitchen staff how to cook fish after being DONE with fish in the first place lolol

Wars flirting, Legend eating Marinara haha

Poor Twi is such a sibling stuck in the middle of the other two bickering hahaha

Thank you for this🤣🤣🤣

[whocaresifwearecrazy]

Alpha: Anyone d- Red Herring: Depressed? Lovers: Drained? Jester: Dumb? Screamer: Disliked? Alpha: -done with their work... what is wrong with you people...

~~~

*Squad is playing Among Us* Believer: I believe Red Herring is innocent, I was with them the whole time. Jester, what were you doing? Jester: Oh, I was just murdering… I mean, nothing!

~~~

Sheriff: What the fuck is wrong with you?? Believer: What? No good morning? Sheriff: Good morning, what the fuck is wrong with you??

~~~

Lovers: Regular soda is too sweet! Jester: Diet soda has a weird after taste! Lovers: No! Ugh, oh my god. Diet soda is THE BEST! It doesn't have sugar! It's SPICY! Jester: It has other weird stuff in it! I'll take REGULAR sugar in my REGULAR soda! Lovers: It's SO SWEET like it's a dessert though! Diet feels more like a drink! Jester: I'm going to physically attack you. Lovers: Which is better, Sheriff? Sheriff: Oh, I usually drink water! Jester: Wha- NO! Lovers: DISGUSTING!

~~~

Red Herring: Mice are having sex in my walls. Jester: Tattletale! Nerd: You're just being ungrateful. Alpha: It's their home too, you know. Believer: So what? Don't slutshame them. Red Herring: The mice are fucking AND now I'm getting heckled.

~~~

Nerd: You know I think my life has value. Alpha: Who are you and what have you done with Nerd?!

~~~

Sheriff: What kinds of sounds annoy you? Red Herring: Are we talking real sounds or imaginary ones? Sheriff, now interested: Lets say imaginary. Red Herring: Spiders wearing flip flops.

~~~

Sheriff: Not to brag, but I can go into the Spirit Halloween without crying.

~~~

Sheriff: Last night, I had a dream about sandwich pizza. Lovers: What? Sheriff: It was pizza with bread on the top and the bottom. Lovers: So a calzone? Sheriff: You can’t just name things I dream up.

~~~

Sheriff: *venting endlessly to Alpha about their week* Alpha, every once in a while: *in a monotone* Wow, that is so wild.

~~~

Alpha: Let's all agree that going up the stairs on all fours is actually the best experience on earth. Nerd: Conversely, going down the stairs on all fours is actually the most terrifying experience on earth.

~~~

Sheriff: Are you packed for the trip? Believer: Yup. Sheriff: Then where are your bags? Believer: All I’m bringing is a good attitude and a sense of adventure. Sheriff: A change of underwear might be nice.

~~~

Sheriff: I'm very scary. Lovers: You're about as scary as a wet kitten. Sheriff: Wet kittens are cute, at least I've got that going for me. Lovers: And small. Sheriff: Sheriff: ...Yeah, yeah. I guess.

~~~

Alpha, pointing to Believer and Lovers: Distract them! I'll be right back! *leaves* Nerd: Okay! *five minutes later* Alpha: *returns and sees Believer and Lovers unconscious on the ground* What did you do? I said distract them, not knock them out! Nerd: There's just no pleasing you sometimes.

~~~

Alpha: Awww, why don't you like cats, Jester? They're just snuggly buddies! They have toe beans! They make a little blep! What's not to love?? Jester: I don't know Alpha, I just prefer to be conscious instead of dead on the floor. Alpha: Jester: I'm ALLERGIC.

~~~

Sheriff: Did you hear that!? Believer just threatened to destroy my lego AT-AT! Lovers: ...You just threatened to kill them in their sleep.

~~~

Alpha: sapnu puaS. Lovers: What?? Sheriff: What language is that. Alpha: Turn your phone 180 degrees. *Alpha was removed from the group chat*

~~~

Sheriff: Why is everyone so obsessed with top or bottom? Honestly, I’d just be excited to have a bunk bed. Believer: Believer: I'm gonna tell them. Alpha: Don't you dare.

~~~

Sheriff: Jester is a perfect cinnamon scone who’s never done anything wrong in their entire life! Screamer: Never done anything wrong?! They set a city block on FIRE!

~~~

Sheriff: I'm gonna eat the chicken breasts! Jester, snickering: Yeah, eat what you lack. Believer, deadpanning at Jester: Then maybe I should order brains on delivery for you.

~~~

Alpha: So, how long have you and Believer been together? Screamer: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Believer and I are not together. No. No. Alpha: Really? Sixteen ‘nos’? Really?

[hansomeskz]

The 30th

Read on Ao3 | Read on Wattpad | talk to me on twitter :3

Minho groans to himself, curling his fingers a little tighter around the steering wheel as all the cars at a complete standstill try to make room for the ambulance barreling down the shoulder. 

It was obvious something had happened, the highway is rarely ever this backed up at seven pm, but Minho can’t help but be annoyed. He hasn’t moved in what feels like forever.

He glances down to check and see if Jisung had texted him back, their conversation from earlier today is still open on his phone.

Hannie

It sounds like I’m gonna be home first tonight!!

I’ll make us something

Orrrr order in…

I don’t want to cook

Minho

I don’t mind take out

What are you thinking about ordering baby?

Hannie

You were supposed to pick so I don’t have to make any decisions :(

Worst boyfriend ever  :,(

Minho

Let’s get pizza. 

We can eat something greasy and watch a movie.

Hannie

Sounds divine!!

Pep pep okay or are you in the mood for something else??

Minho

Maybe meat lovers?

I don’t know, what are you in the mood for?

Can we get cheesy bread?

He hasn’t heard from him since. Minho wonders if maybe he just picked something and ordered, or if he fell asleep the second he got home.

Jisung has been tired lately so it wouldn’t really surprise him at all if he walked in to find him knocked out on the couch with the delivery app open. 

The traffic is getting moved to a detour, Minho realizes, and he cranes his neck to see if he can spot the accident. He can’t see much except glass and metal scattered across the empty expanse a few dozen feet ahead, the emergency vehicles are in the way of everything else.

He tries to search up what may have happened, but the accident seems so fresh that it hasn’t made any news, yet.

Minho

There’s an accident on the highway

Traffic is so fucked

I might be a bit later than I expected.

When his messages go undelivered, he assumes Jisung’s phone finally died. He curses the way that boy never charges the damn thing.

It takes him an hour longer than it usually would for Minho to get home. When he does, he's met with utter confusion. Jisung’s car isn’t in the driveway. 

He heads inside, calling out for his boyfriend. He’s met with silence, so he checks all the places he can think of. Every room in the house is just as Minho left it when he left for work this morning. 

As the panic starts to grow in his chest, his ringtone cuts through the unusual silence. It’s Jisung’s mom.

 “Hello?” He presses the phone tightly to his ear, being met with only wracking sobs on the other side. “What’s going on?”

“Minho, there’s been an accident. You need to get to the hospital as soon as you can.” He’s never heard anyone cry as hard as she is, tears pooling in his own eyes, too. 

“What happened?”

“Please, come.” He hears the line go dead.

Minho rushes out without a second thought, grateful he sees no cops on his way there to stop him from speeding. 

When he bursts into the waiting room, Jisung’s mom, Iseul, and older brother, Doyeon, are huddled together. His mom is inconsolable, face buried in Doyeon’s shoulder. 

“What happened?” Minho asks again as he sits on Iseul’s other side. His heart is in his throat and he feels like he’s suffocating, now.

“There was an accident on the highway today,” Doyeon starts, taking a deep breath. “Minho…he’s really hurt. They have him in surgery now, but they don’t know if he’ll even wake up after. He’s been unconscious since they found him.”

Minho’s heart plummets down into his stomach. Tears prick at his eyes as he tries to make sense of the words. 

“I-I don’t understand. We were just talking a few hours ago. He was okay.” Tears start to spill over as his shoulders shake. “I just thought he was sleeping at home.”

A sob tears through his chest, unexpected and unwelcome.

Iseul pries herself away from Doyeon to cling to Minho instead. He pulls her close, burying his face in her hair as they cry together. 

Minho has never known this kind of hurt. 

They don’t speak another word until a doctor comes out to address them. 

He stands in front of them and tries to fill them in but Minho feels like the doctor is speaking in another language. He’s able to pick out bits and pieces, enough to collect that Jisung is alive, but still unconscious. 

The accident, it seems, was so bad that he needed to have several fractures surgically set. They aren’t sure of the extent of Jisung’s brain damage. It seems like he’ll recover but they won’t know unless he wakes up.

They let the three of them into the room, but Minho can’t bring himself to step inside. He doesn’t want to know the severity of the situation.

A few minutes later, Doyeon steps back out and offers both of his hands to Minho, pulling him inside when he takes them. His knees nearly give out when his eyes land on Jisung.

Jisung. His Jisung. He looks so unfamiliar here. His usually bright, brilliant smile and his wide, curious eyes are nowhere to be seen. He would look peaceful were it not for the tubes going down his nose or the IVs taped into him. His leg is propped up, ankle already set in a plaster cast. Minho’s stomach churns.

As he steps closer, shaking, he takes in the rest of the damage.

It looks to him like Jisung slid down the asphalt. His left side is scraped up in a way Minho could never describe, slices scattered in from the glass shards he’d seen when he was driving past. 

When he takes the younger boy’s hand, intertwining their fingers, he’s disappointed to realize Jisung can’t hold him back.

The tears start up all over again and his knees finally give out. Minho presses his face into the side of the hospital bed, keeping Jisung’s hand in his own. 

Apologies are tumbling past his lips at lightning speed, but Minho doesn’t even know what he’s sorry for. He’s sorry to Jisung that he wasn’t there. Sorry he didn’t know. Sorry he didn’t tell the younger boy he loves him countless times before he left this morning. Sorry he didn’t realize the wreck he’d been annoyed about was him. 

He’s sorry to Jisung’s family for making this about him. Sorry to Doyeon for having to take care of him, and sorry to Iseul that her son might never wake up. Sorry to God for whatever Minho did to have him deserve this kind of pain. 

Doyeon kneels next to Minho, rubbing small comforting circles into his back. Jisung’s mom pulls up a chair next to the bed, holding Jisung’s other hand. 

When his legs feel a bit more solid, Minho stands. Doyeon pushes a chair closer for him, patting his back before excusing himself to go get everyone something to drink. 

Nobody says a word. What do you even say in a moment like this? The two of them sniffle together, watching over Jisung as if they could do anything to protect him. 

Doyeon makes them both drink some water when he comes back. Minho feels like he’s watching himself through somebody else’s eyes, sure that this can’t be real. Maybe it’s all a terrible dream.

He wants nothing more than to wake up in his bed next to a fluffy blond mop of hair or to wake up at his desk and drive straight home to the love of his life.

He knows that’s not possible, though.

A doctor comes in quite a bit later, clearing her throat. “You know, most times comatose patients can still hear the world around them. I don’t know if it offers you any comfort, but if you have anything you’d like to say to him, I think it might be worth a try,” she says softly. “Thank you, doctor.” Doyeon smiles lightly at her, placing a hand on his mom’s shoulder.

The doctor checks some vitals and makes some notes in Jisung’s file before excusing herself again. When Iseul starts to speak to her youngest son, Minho has to leave. She talks to him like he’s dead, and that’s not something Minho is willing to think about right now. 

He wanders through the hallways for a while, his bottle of water in hand. He feels strangely comforted by the background noises of the hospital. It reminds him that he isn’t the only one feeling like this right now.

Then he remembers their friends.

Minho’s stomach twists at the idea of having to tell everybody. He knows the right thing to do would be to call each of them but he’s not sure he could get himself to say the words out loud at all, let alone 6 times. He pulls out his phone and shoots off text after text, having to break it up so it seems less serious. Less real.

Minho

guys

im sorry to have to text this

jisung’s been in a really bad accident.

he’s comatose, in really bad shape.

they say they think he’ll be okay but anything could happen I guess

no visitors tonight please but we can arrange something 

starting tomorrow if you guys want to see him

Felix

fuck.

are you serious?

Seungmin

Holy shit.

Jeongin

??????

Hyunjin

please tell me you’re kidding

Changbin

Minho I’m so sorry

Are you okay??

A call from Chan comes through pretty quickly. Minho hesitates but picks up after a few rings. “Hey…”

“Are you serious?”

“Yeah,” Minho says quietly, voice shaking. “Yeah, I’m serious. I wish I were kidding. I keep hoping this is some sick fucking joke.”

“Shit, Min. I’m so sorry. How are you feeling?” 

Minho knows Chan is asking as a kind gesture, but the question bothers him so much. Of course he isn’t feeling good about it, but that shouldn’t matter. What matters is Jisung and the fact that he might never wake up. 

His snappy comments die in his throat, though. They morph into a choked sob, sounding so broken and animalistic that it surprises even himself.  He’s already tired of crying. “I’m so fucking scared, Chan.”

“I bet, Minho. Can I pick you up tonight?”

“I don’t know if I can bring myself to leave.”

“You’ll get kicked out eventually. I’ll be in the waiting room, okay?”

Minho considers arguing, lashing out at Chan because somebody has to suffer with him. He thinks better of it, though. He knows all of their friends are hurting right now. “Okay… thank you.”

“Of course. See you soon.”

Minho hangs up, heading back for Jisung’s room. 

When he steps in, Jisung’s family are gathering their things. “We were just going to call you. They’re asking us to leave, but visiting hours start again at eight.”

Minho’s chest aches, but he nods. “I’m just going to say goodbye quickly. I have somebody coming to pick me up, so I’ll see you guys tomorrow, I guess.”

“See you, honey.” Iseul gives him a tight hug and a kiss on the cheek before leaving, misty-eyed. 

Once the room is empty, he slowly turns to Jisung. “What a mess, Hannie… I’ll only be gone a few hours, okay?” He leans down, pressing a gentle kiss to the blond’s forehead. His heart breaks a little when Jisung doesn’t react, even if Minho knows he can’t.

“I’ll be back before you know it. Don’t miss me too much, okay?” He laces their fingers together long enough to press a kiss to Jisung’s knuckles before placing his hand back down gently and stepping out of the room. 

Chan is already there when he steps into the waiting room. As Minho approaches him, he looks up from his phone, standing quickly. 

Minho is grateful for the bone-crushing hug Chan gives him, tears pooling in his eyes for what feels like the millionth time tonight. 

“Minho, I’m so fucking sorry.”

“You didn’t hit him, don’t be sorry.” Minho is trying to joke, but neither of them laughs. Chan just pulls away, looking at him with glossy eyes. “Do you want to stay with me tonight? We can stop by yours and pick up some clothes. Maybe you can take a shower and then we can sleep at mine, yeah?”

Minho just nods weakly, grateful that Chan always knows what to do.

When they get home he does shower, pretends for a moment that it’s Jisung waiting for him in the living room instead of Chan. When he gets dressed he throws on one of his boyfriend’s hoodies and sprays his cologne, hoping the blond won’t mind when he finds the bottle a little emptier if he ever comes home. 

He packs himself a bag of things he knows he’ll need, then joins Chan out in the living room.

The older boy is just texting, standing when he spots Minho. “Ready?”

“No,” he sighs, looking around. “But I won’t ever be. Let’s just go.”

Chan leads them out to the car, letting Minho pick the music for the trip. Minho is doing a good job at keeping it together until Chan taps the wheel gently, glancing over at him. “We can stop and pick up pizza for dinner. I bet you haven’t eaten.”

Something inside Minho breaks for the millionth time today as he bursts into tears. Chan visibly panics, turning his eyes back to the road. “It doesn’t have to be pizza, fuck, do you hate pizza?”

“We were supposed to have pizza tonight,” he cries, burying his face in his hands. “He was going to order it when he got home, be he never fucking got home.”

Chan frowns but he doesn’t respond. Minho doesn’t blame him for a second because really, what can you say? He just sits in the passenger seat and cries his eyes out. The older boy gets them McDonald’s instead.

Chan sets him up in his room, putting the food in the fridge for later when Minho refuses it. He plugs in Minho’s phone and computer for him and leaves a hot tea on the bedside table along with a glass of water. “I’ll be on the couch if you need absolutely anything, Minho. Don’t be afraid to come get me.”

“Thank you, Chan.”

“Of course. Goodnight, Min.” Chan ruffles the brunet’s hair gently before stepping out. Minho sets an alarm for 7 so he can be there the second visiting hours start.

It goes without saying, but Minho doesn’t sleep much that night. The few minutes he does get are restless, the idea of receiving a call that something’s gone wrong haunting him. 

When his alarm goes off he climbs out of bed quickly, packing his things back into his bag. He is quick to run down the stairs despite knowing it’s no more than a ten-minute drive back to the hospital.

It takes a few tries but he gets Chan up, letting him know they have to leave at quarter to eight. Chan groggily agrees, going off to shower.

As he waits for the older boy he scrolls through the group chat to see what he’s missed.

Chan

I’m on my way to pick Minho up from the hospital now.

He’s staying with me tonight.

Felix

let me know if there’s any way I can help!!!!!!

Changbin

And let us know when we’re allowed to visit.

Hyunjin

He was serious?

This can’t be happening.

Seungmin

Just keep us posted.

Minho

You guys can visit today.

Three visitor maximum but I doubt his family will be there all day today.

They both have crazy work schedules

I’ll be there all day though

You guys can take turns.

Starts at 8 ends at 10. 

Jeongin

We’ll all be there today!!!!!!!!!!!

Felix

How are you feeling min?

Minho

You’re not going to believe this.

I feel like utter shit

Seungmin

Truly shocking!

But seriously, let us know what we can do to help Minho.

Hyunjin

Any food you’re craving

Minho

I feel like I’m going to throw up.

Changbin

We’ll bring you something anyway

Chan

No pizza.

Minho looks up from his phone, spotting Chan coming down the stairs. “Yeah, that’s fair,” he says quietly. 

Chan offers him a small smile. “I was hoping you’d get a kick out of that.”

“You’re usually not funny, but I’ll give you this one because I… I really need it.” Minho glances down as his phone lights up with more messages from his friends, but he slips his phone into his pocket so he doesn’t have to think about them. 

“Ready to go?” Chan asks. Minho slings his bag over his shoulder, nodding.

The nurses are kind enough to let them into the room a few minutes early. 

As they step in, Minho’s heart breaks all over again. The scrapes and scratches down the side of Jisung’s face look agitated, as if they’ve just been cleaned, but he looks as peaceful as ever. “Good morning, baby. I brought Chan with me, I think the rest of them are coming by later.” 

Chan looks at Minho like he’s crazy as the brunet gets himself situated, pulling a chair right up to Jisung’s bedside and taking his hand. “A doctor said that he can hear us… she said it might help if we talk to him.” Minho kisses Jisung’s knuckles tenderly, watching him.

Chan nods softly, pulling up a chair on the other side of the bed. “Then… hi, Hannie. This is such a weird way to see you. I don’t think you’ve ever been quiet this long in your fucking life.” The older boy ruffles Jisung’s hair back down onto his forehead from where the nurses had pushed it back overnight. 

“There, that looks a little better,” Chan says quietly, leaning against the edge of the bed. 

Minho inspects the injuries to the blond’s face a bit closer, frowning. He looks at Chan, his chest aching. “You know, I drove past the car wreck on my way home from work. I didn’t even… I didn’t think anything of it.”

“Well, why would you, Minho? You can’t assume every car wreck is somebody you know.”

“I just remember being annoyed at the traffic it caused. I keep thinking about how he’d feel bad if he knew they’d closed off a whole section of the highway for it,” Minho chokes out a humourless laugh. “He’d probably apologize for making me get home late...”

“He would,” Chan shakes his head a bit, gazing down at Jisung. “I bet you feel bad you’re causing us stress too, huh? You’re going to wake up and apologize for all the trouble, I can feel it.”

“Oh, he sure fucking will,” Minho says, squeezing the younger boy’s hand gently. “Won’t you, baby?” He presses another kiss to his knuckles. 

They fall silent for a moment, just watching him. Jisung is unmoving, no sign of waking up. It breaks Minho’s heart to see him like this.

Jisung’s mom steps in wearing her work uniform. “I’m sorry to interrupt, I just wanted to visit before I go.”

“I’m surprised they’re making you work,” Chan says, raising his eyebrows. “There’s nobody to cover my shifts, I have to go in…” 

She slips in next to Minho, leaning down to kiss Jisung’s forehead. “I love you Jisung. Get better soon, I already miss you.” She strokes his cheek gently, sighing before heading back for the door. 

“Call me if anything happens,” Iseul says to Minho. He nods. “Of course. You know I will.”

“I know. Make sure you eat something, sweetheart.” She waves before heading on her way, and then they’re alone again.

Chan’s phone rings shortly after, alerting them of the arrival of their friends. He goes to collect them, leaving Minho on his own.

He takes the few seconds he has to be a little sappier than he could with somebody else around, cupping Jisung’s cheek gently and kissing his temple. 

“I need you to wake up, okay? I can’t do this without you, so you have to fucking wake up.”  He presses his lips to the blonde’s forehead, too. “I’m not doing this shit on my own, do you understand?”

Minho might see the corner of Jisung’s mouth quirk up ever so slightly, but he’s probably imagining it. 

Hyunjin and Felix step into the room as Minho pulls away, clasping Jisung’s hand between both of his own. 

“Hey…” Hyunjin says quietly, sliding into the empty chair across from him. Felix comes around behind Minho, rubbing his shoulders gently. 

They both stare at Jisung, lost for words. 

“He can hear you,” Minho suggests, pausing for a second to reconsider his words. 

“Or- the doctor says he can. Maybe she was just trying to make me feel better…” he trails off, wondering how many more times he’ll have to say those words today. 

The next few hours drag on, their friends taking turns coming in and talking to Jisung. Minho stays in his seat for hours, slowly choking up with every word uttered in his direction.

By the time Changbin steps in, Minho’s hit his emotional limits. He’s the last one to show up, a container of fried rice in hand. “I know you’re not going to eat it, but I brought this for you anyway.” 

He puts the container on a table nearby before slipping into the empty chair across from him. “You know, Hannie, this is fucked up of you.”

Minho’s eyes go wide, a shocked laugh pushing past his lips. “Changbin!”

“No, it’s fucked up!” Changbin is smiling lightly, raising his eyebrows. “You’re pulling all the weight here as a host, he’s just laying there looking all broken and shit.”

Minho covers his mouth, trying to stifle his laughter. He knew Changbin would be the one to help take his mind off of this shitty situation. He’s a breath of fresh air compared to the others.

“You’re awful, Changbin,” he scolds playfully, squeezing Jisung’s hand. 

“Yeah, well, I’m sure that’s the first smile you’re cracked since the news broke so if that’s what it takes, I’ll be awful.” 

Minho is so grateful to have him here.

“Do you want me to come back and pick you up tonight?”

“Please.”

“Yeah, you got it.” Changbin pats Jisung’s shoulder. “I’m coming for your man, Han. Watch your fuckin’ back.” Changbin pushes himself out of the chair. 

“I won’t take up too much of your time, Min. Just wanted to get a peek. He looks pretty fucked up in the whole…” He gestures vaguely to the entirety of Jisung. “This region.” 

Minho shakes his head, fixing the blond’s hair tenderly. “Don’t be mean, he looks handsome.”

“If he really can hear us, it’s fucked up of you to lie to him.”

The brunet laughs, rolling his eyes. “Get out of here before I beat your ass, Changbin.”

“I’ll be back at ten to pick you up, okay?”

“Okay, thank you.”

“‘Course, Min.” He steps out after that.

Minho feels lucky to have his friends. He appreciates how quickly they all dropped everything to come to see them. Even though his chest aches at the idea that the focus isn’t entirely on Jisung, he’s grateful they’re worried about him too.

With the pressure of hosting their friends gone, he pulls out his laptop and adjusts his chair, propping his feet up on the edge of the bed. He feels a little silly as he rests Jisung’s hand on his ankle.

He puts on one of the blond’s favourite playlists and takes some time to answer a few work emails, letting his boss know he’ll be out of the office for the next little while. He sings quietly to the songs, wondering if it helps Jisung at all to hear it

At nine he gives himself a full hour to just hold Jisung’s hand and whisper sweet nothings to him. He presses gentle kisses all up the blond’s scabby, cut-up arm, eyes brimming with tears for almost the whole time. He wonders if the scrapes from the asphalt hurt, even if the younger boy is unconscious.

Ten PM arrives too quickly and a nurse drops by to let Minho know visiting hours are over. He thanks her quietly and collects his things, kissing Jisung on the forehead. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, baby. Be good for the doctors, okay?” He lingers for a moment in hopes he’ll answer but he obviously doesn’t.

When he meets Changbin in the lobby, the younger boy slings an arm around Minho’s shoulders. “Did you eat any of the food I brought?”

“I feel like I’m going to hurl.”

“What if we drink a little and eat some snacks? Chips and shit?”

“Yeah, Okay. That sounds good.” Minho knows it’s probably a bad idea, but he’d do anything to stop thinking about all of this for one singular second. 

Changbin hands him a beer once they’re both settled at his place. “So like, seriously, how are you holding up?” He places a bowl of kettle corn in front of Minho on the table, which he reluctantly picks at.

“This is so fucked, man. I don’t know if I even really understand what’s happening, yet. I just know that I can’t text him, and I can’t have a conversation with him. I just know I woke up alone this morning. I can only hope I don’t have to keep doing that.”

“He’s going to be fine. Jisung is the strongest, dumbest whore I know. The world couldn’t continue to spin without his dumbassery,” Changbin says simply, taking a long sip of his drink. 

Minho’s eyes fill with tears and he stares up at the ceiling in an attempt to will them away. 

“It’s okay to cry about it, you know. This is hard.”

“I cried from the second I got to the fucking hospital yesterday, I’m sick of it.” Minho squeezes his eyes shut, a few rogue tears rolling down his cheeks. Changbin gently wipes them away.

“Can you thank everybody for coming out today? I can’t look at the group chat for too long. It just… feels like somebody’s missing.” Minho sniffs, sipping on his beer, he’s barely had any but his skin is already starting to heat up. The only benefit to his inability to eat, he thinks.

“Of course, Min. I’ll let them know you were glad to see everyone.” Changbin puts on a movie for them to watch, taking the pressure off Minho to speak anymore. The beer and exhaustion start to catch up to him as he sinks deeper into the couch cushions, his eyes slipping shut every few seconds. Changbin just leaves him be.

He does end up falling asleep, waking up panicked a few hours later. He scrambled up into a sitting position, desperately grabbing for his phone. When the screen lights up, he’s relieved to see he has no new notifications. 

He looks around to try and ground himself, only calming down when he spots Changbin asleep on the other end of the couch. 

Minho feels a little stupid as he shuffles across the couch to curl up against Changbin. The dark-haired boy is startled at first, lifting his head to look around quickly before he realizes what’s happening.

He makes a sleepy sound and pats his leg, resting his head back against the couch. Minho is grateful as he rests his head on Changbin’s lap.

The younger boy tangles his fingers into Minho’s hair, rubbing his scalp gently. It helps calm him down enough for him to fall back to sleep.

When morning comes, Changbin’s the one who wakes him up. Minho pushes himself up, blearily looking at the raven-haired boy. 

“It’s seven-thirty. We should leave soon if you want to get there right on time,” he says quietly. Minho just nods and gathers his things. 

They’re both quiet on the ride to the hospital. Every time Minho feels suffocated by the silence, Changbin pats his knee gently and suddenly everything feels a bit better. 

The younger boy follows him into Jisung’s hospital room, much like Chan did the day before. 

“Good morning, honey,” Minho coos, cupping the blond’s cheeks and pressing a kiss to the top of his head. “I’m happy to see you.”

He takes his usual seat and clasps his boyfriend's hand between both of his own as Changbin takes the empty chair across from him. 

Changbin leans forward to get a better look at the damage to Jisung’s face. “This is fucking brutal. Did they slide him across sandpaper for good measure?”

“They won’t tell me how he got so fucked up, I’ve asked. He’s got titanium plates on a few of his ribs, too. I’m surprised he’s not more fucked up considering the state he’s in..” Minho squeezes his hand gently. 

“I’m glad he’s not worse than this, this is already hard to look at.”

“Yeah, I agree.” The two fall silent after that. Minho is grateful for Changbin’s companionship in moments like these. 

He doesn’t even realize he’s crying until Changbin looks at him, breathing out a soft “hey…” and offering him the box of tissues from a nearby table. Minho takes it, plucking one out and dabbing at his eyes. “Sorry, I just…”

“You don’t have to apologize. This isn’t easy, Min.”

“I just miss his voice, that’s all,” he cries. He thinks he must be imagining the small twitches in Jisung’s hand, mistaking the shakes of his own shoulders as movement in his boyfriend’s body. 

Changbin comes around to his side of the bed, rubbing Minho’s shoulders much like Felix did the day before. “I know, Minho. It’s going to be okay.” He stands like that for a long time before he finally excuses himself to get them both some water.

Minho kicks him out soon after he gets back, completely dissolved into tears. Changbin looks like he doesn’t want to leave him alone, but does as he’s asked anyway. “I’m only a call away,” he says on his way out. 

He feels so fucking pathetic. Minho’s never had such a terrible grasp on his emotions. He used to be the rock for his friends and for Jisung, but he can’t even begin to be there for anyone else right now when he feels so fully and completely devastated. 

Sobs wrack his body for what feels like hours as he clings to Jisung’s hand, pressing his forehead against it. He doesn’t know how to make this helpless feeling go away. 

Usually, he’d have something terrible happen and go straight to Jisung. The blond would know just what to do to make it all feel better, but he can’t ask him to fix it now.

The nurses must hear him and take pity because a pair of them step in with some snacks from their kitchen and a cup of iced water. One slips back out of the room quietly, but the other crouches next to Minho, looking up at him warmly. He sits up, feeling like a kid as his bottom lip trembles.

She takes one of his hands, squeezing gently. “He’s on track to get better, you know. It can be scary, having to sit in the ICU with him, but he’s doing a lot better. He’s responding to some sensations.”

“Responding?” Minho sniffs, squeezing her hand, too. She nods. 

“Sometimes when you perform an act that might be uncomfortable for him, like poking the bottom of his foot with a needle or touching part of his body that hurts, he might slightly move that part of his body, or… you might see his face twitch. He doesn’t have full control since his body is still asleep, he’s in and out of consciousness right now, but it’s a really good sign.”

Hope blooms in Minho’s chest at the idea that Jisung is already getting better. “Okay,” he says quietly, nodding more to himself than anything. “That’s good.”

“Maybe look for meaning in his little twitches. They might be more telling than you think.” She pushes herself up, patting his back. “And drink some water, you’ll get dehydrated if you don’t, and then you’ll both be in the hospital. That won’t be much help at all.”

She excuses herself after that, but Minho is grateful she came by. He scoops Jisung’s hand back into his own, sniffling. 

For the next few days, Minho falls into a routine. His friends and Jisung’s family show up when they can, but Minho stays there all day every single day. He’ll work for a couple of hours on his laptop, playing music he knows Jisung loves, and then he spends the rest of his visiting hours searching for meaning in every little twitch in Jisung’s body. 

He notices when Changbin’s around the corners of his lips quirk up ever so slightly at the terrible jokes.

He notices the longer exhale and the slight tension in his eyebrows when Jisung’s brother accidentally places a hand on his rib cage.

He notices that when he cries, the younger boy’s fingers twitch more often.

All of these small movements pay off on day five, while Jeongin and Minho are eating lunch.

“God, shut up Jeongin. Jisung, tell him he’s being annoying,” Minho playfully snaps, the way he scowls at the youngest boy nearly causing him to miss the flutter of Jisung’s eyes, a small groan escaping his lips. 

The two of them look at each other, eyes blown wide. Minho puts his food down, scooping up the blond’s hand. “Hannie, can you hear me?”

Minho’s heart leaps into his throat as he feels his boyfriend’s hand twitch and watches his eyes flutter, once, then twice, lips moving as if he’s trying to speak.

Jeongin is quick to press the nurse call button, letting them know what’s going on as Minho leans further over the bed. 

“Jisungie, baby, honey, you’re doing so good. Keep going, keep talking to me,” Minho says, choking up. He reaches a hand out to cup the blond’s cheek, his pooling tears spilling over as Jisung leans into his touch a little, eyes slowly peeling open. 

The words the younger boy is saying don’t make sense, he’s babbling as he comes out of it, but Minho is smiling like he’s just heard Jisung propose. He’s nodding enthusiastically, trying to stop the tears but he’s just so fucking relieved to see Jisung’s wide doe eyes. 

“That’s it, baby. I hear you, I fucking hear you.” He pulls away, stepping aside to let the doctors in around him. Jeongin signals that he’s going to call the others and Minho nods. “His mom, call his mom first.”

Jeongin nods, shooting him a thumbs up before darting out of the room.

Minho watches in a mixture of relief and horror as Jisung comes out of the coma, his confusion morphing into pure frustration. After a few minutes of Jisung thrashing, trying to ground himself, the nurse from a few days before ushers Minho out. “Somebody will come to get you from the waiting room once we’ve had the chance to assess him, okay?”

The brunet nods, his tears refusing to stop rolling down his cheeks. “Okay- yeah, okay, thank you.”

He meets Jeongin in the waiting room and sits with him, feeling more and more nauseous as more of his friends arrive. 

Iseul and Doyeon are last to arrive, both clad in their work uniforms. Once everybody’s there he fills them in, rubbing his forehead. He’s exhausted, he thinks. Tired, scared, and so annoyed that Jisung’s family wasn’t there when he woke up. 

That bothers him the most, he thinks. He spent the past five days completely and fully dedicated to Jisung, knowing he could have died at any moment. That he still could. The idea that he only saw them two or three times throughout the stay so far makes him fucking livid.

He wonders if Chan can read his mind as the oldest boy rests a hand on his shoulder, shaking his head softly. He doesn’t have to speak for Minho to hear what he’s saying. It’s not worth it right now. 

They all just sit around staring at each other as they wait for any updates at all. Minho starts dry heaving after an hour of no word.

Finally, finally, a doctor comes out to address them. The doctor looks exasperated. “Lee Minho,” he says, sighing. “He won’t talk to us without you in the room.”

He can feel eight pairs of eyes burning into his back as he numbly follows the doctor down the hall. 

When he steps in, Jisung’s eyes find him immediately. “Min- min, please, what’s going on?” The blond’s eyes are brimming with tears, his voice hoarse. 

“You’re in the hospital, Ji.” Minho settles on the edge of the bed, lacing their fingers together, he ignores the way Jisung winces as he moves his arm in favour of letting the younger squeeze his hand tightly. 

“What happened?”

“You were in an accident. I-I’m sorry, I don’t really know the details.” Minho presses his lips together in a thin line, trying his best to hold back the tears threatening to spill. 

“Can you tell us what you remember, Mr.Han?”

“I-I don’t… I was driving, and this guy was up my ass, and then… “ he furrows his brows, knowing he’s missing a critical piece of the story. “And then I was here. I’m sorry, I don’t know anything else.” He looks up at the doctors, sniffling. 

Minho gently brushes the blond’s tears away.

“It’s okay, baby. You’re doing so good for us. Thank you.” He presses a tender kiss to the younger boy’s forehead, giving his hand a gentle squeeze. Jisung squeezes back, firm and present. Minho missed that feeling. 

The doctors continue their assessment with Jisung more willing to participate now that Minho’s present. 

Once they’ve run all the tests that they can right now they let them know the visitors can see him one at a time. They amend the rule shortly after, when Minho tries to leave to let the others in and Jisung visibly panics, his heart rate skyrocketing. 

The blond makes room for Minho to sit right next to him against the doctor's orders, but the brunet truly doesn’t give a shit about that right now. He squeezes into the space, careful not to bump Jisung, and holds his hand as tight as the younger boy will let him.

He sits through all eight of their friends and Jisung’s family’s visits with the younger boy. His mom cries, apologizing for things that are beyond her control. It makes Jisung cry, too.

Jisung seems surprised to see Doyeon and they end up just mindlessly chattering about nothing related to the hospital visit. Minho’s grateful for that, to be honest.

Their friends each tease Jisung, because of course he’s the one that would get into an accident. They each finish off with their own sappy little sentiment, mostly just glad to see he’s okay. 

When the two finally get a second alone, Jisung tries to turn to Minho. The older boy is quick to move, carefully straddling his legs instead. “You can’t turn like that, your ribs are so fucked baby.”

Jisung coughs a little, nodding slightly. “I noticed.”

“How are you feeling?” He cups the younger boy’s cheeks, planting quick kisses all over his face. Jisung smiles weakly, whining a bit. 

“I heard you while I was asleep. Minho. It was so terrifying to be aware of everything happening around me but not being able to tell you I was there.” Tears are pooling in Jisung’s eyes again. He tries to blink them away, but it does nothing but force them out, trickling slowly down his cheeks.

“I could hear you crying and you kept apologizing, but I couldn’t do anything. I couldn’t tell you that you have nothing to be sorry for.” Jisung’s shaky hands come up to rest on Minho’s chest. The older boy’s short shallow breaths give away that he’s trying not to cry.

Jisung presses their forehead together, his eyes slipping shut. “I’m the one who’s sorry,” he says, voice breaking. “I’m sorry I didn’t get you pizza for dinner like I promised. I’m sorry I wasn’t more careful. I’m sorry you’ve been doing this all on your own…” 

Minho shakes his head, failing miserably to choke back the pathetic sobs that are fighting to escape him. 

“You did nothing wrong, Hannie. I’m just glad you’re okay. I missed you, missed your voice, fuck, I wish I could hug you right now…”

He gasps when Jisung throws his arms around Minho. The younger groans quietly in pain but buries his face in Minho’s neck anyway. “Hurts so good, Min. I wanted to do this the whole fucking time I was out.”

Minho lets it happen for a little bit, having missed his touch too much to tell him no. When he decides he’s had his fill for now the older boy carefully pulls away, squeezing back into the spot beside the blond.

They sit together for hours, whispering apologies and stories of what either of them remember from the past few days. When a nurse comes in to let them know visiting hours are over, Jisung starts to panic again.

Minho runs a hand through his hair, pressing a kiss to his forehead. “I’ll be back right at eight. That’s not even twelve hours away. Just get some rest, baby.” He peels himself away from the younger boy, climbing out of bed.

Jisung just looks up at him with his stupid doe eyes, looking absolutely terrified. “You really have to go?”

“I’ll be back before you know it, Hannie. I promise. You can text me, too. I promise I’ll answer as long as I’m awake.”

“Okay, Minho…” Jisung shoots him a puppy dog look but the brunet averts his eyes, knowing they both really need some rest. “I love you, Ji.”

“I love you too, Min. I’ll see you at eight?”

“Not a second later.” He offers Jisung a smile on his way out, making his way out to his car.

It still sits where he left it when he first arrived almost a week ago. His friends had been so insistent on taking care of him that he’d never gotten the chance to take it home.

Minho strips and crawls into bed the second he gets through his front door. He’s just settling in when his phone vibrates on the table next to him. 

Hannie

That text was about me wasn’t it :(((

I’m the accident on the highway :((((((((

How late did you get home that night??????

Minho

Don’t worry about it.

Hannie

Half an hour?

Minho

…

Hannie

LONGER?????

I’m the worsttttttttt :((((((((((((((((

I’m sorry I know how tired you get after work!!

Minho

Seems unimportant now.

Why aren’t you sleeping?

Hannie

Somebody down the hall has what the nurses are referring to as “the night screams”

Minho

Be nice to Agatha she’s really nice :(

Hannie

Can you ask her to stop screaming my head hurts x

Minho

I’ll let her know, baby.

Your headphones are in the bag I left by your bed!

I just remembered

Sorry, I should’ve told you sooner 

Hannie

I owe you my life.

Goodnight baby

I’ll see you tomorrow <3 :D 

Minho

Sleep tight honey.

Minho gets a few hours of restless sleep, waking up before the sun comes up to another million texts from Jisung.

Hannie

Shut the fuck up I did not call u the worst boyfriend ever like an hour before I almost died.

I am a monster

For the record you are the best boyfriend in the world

I’m so lucky to have you.

The nurses were telling me about how you only left me when you had to.

And how everyone would come visit you.

We’re really lucky to have our friends.

I’m so grateful for all of you.

Thank you for being so amazing.

I hope you’re sleeping well

And I hope I’m not waking you up with all these texts!!! 

was just feeling a little mushy

Had to share

Love you baby

See you in a couple hours.

Minho

Did you even sleep at all?

Hannie

I just slept for like 5 days !!!!!!!!!!!!

You won’t believe this but I’m not sleepy

Minho

I don’t believe it

Hannie

What about you, huh?????????

You DIDNT sleep for 5 days 

What are you doing awake

Minho

I just can’t stop thinking about you

Like genuinely.

I’m so happy you’re finally awake.

I am counting the seconds until they let me back in

Not to be sappy

Hannie

NoT tO bE sApPy

Asshole

Now I’m crying

[picture]

I can’t wait to see you

we can nap once you get here <3

Minho laughs a little at the selfie Jisung sends. He looks exhausted but he’s put on a pout for the photo, tears rolling down his cheeks. He texts the younger boy something about him being too soft when he’s drugged up before he hops in the shower.

He takes his time washing his hair and puts extra care into drying and styling it once he’s out. He puts on his favourite cologne and one of his nicer sweaters, a little embarrassed to be dressing up when he knows Jisung won’t care at all. This just feels important to him.

The nurses let him into Jisung’s room five full minutes early and he is quick to crawl into bed with the younger boy.

Jisung smiles tiredly at him and gets comfy. Minho lays on his side so he can admire him, gently tracing his fingers over any cuts and scrapes he can see. 

“Does it hurt?” He asks quietly. Jisung shakes his head softly, turning his head to look at Minho. “Not really but I’m also on a ton of drugs right now.”

The brunet laughs. “Yeah, that’s fair enough.” 

Jisung keeps true to his word about napping together, dozing off not long after that. 

Even though Minho was convinced he couldn’t fall asleep for fear of hurting Jisung, exhaustion must take over at some point. 

The next thing he knows, he’s starting to stir, becoming aware of the hushed voices next to him.

As his eyes focus on Jisung sitting up next to him, the second voice stops suddenly. 

“Oh- sorry Min, I hope we didn’t wake you…” Felix says, smiling sheepishly as the older boy locks eyes with him

Minho grumbles a little, rubbing at his eyes as Jisung laughs at him. “You’re such a baby when you first wake up,” he mumbles, rubbing gentle circles into the brunet’s scalp.

Minho could fall asleep again, especially with the blond massaging his scalp like this, but he knows better than to waste a second that he has with Jisung. He slowly pushes himself up, hugging his knees to his chest.

“All good?” Jisung asks, keeping his hand tangled in Minho’s hair. He nods softly, smiling tiredly at Jisung. He smiles back before going back to his conversation with Felix.

Minho isn’t really listening, just admiring his boyfriend. He thinks about how grateful he is that the younger boy is still here, still somebody he can watch, somebody he can speak to. 

Felix is the first one to realize Minho is crying, just handing a tissue over while he giggles about something Jisung said to him.

The blond turns to look at Minho, cooing softly as he plucks the tissue out of his hand to wipe away the older boy’s years himself. “Now what could you possibly be crying about?”

He doesn’t quite know how to answer that. He just knows he’s happy he doesn’t have something more to cry about. They have a long road ahead until it’s all back to how it was, but he’s fucking lucky Jisung is sitting up next to him. 

A few months later, long after Jisung finished his physical therapy, after the world started spinning like normal, the two boys find themselves sitting around a table with their closest friends. 

They’re on the patio of a restaurant in Paris, somewhere Jisung has always wanted to go but they’d never thought to make the time for before this.

Minho clears his throat suddenly, standing. A hush falls over the table, Jisung eyeing him warily. “I have something to say, guys. It’s going to be really sappy, so if you aren’t ready to hear it, get the fuck out.”

Jisung makes a move to stand and leave, a cheeky grin creeping over his face. Seungmin tugs him back into his seat. Seven of the people at this table know what’s coming. 

“I’ve had a lot of time to think about all of you, and how lucky I am to have you guys. I really can’t imagine a better group of people to spend my life with.” He’s smiling brightly, ignoring the way his hands shake.

Jisung’s eyes go wide as the older boy turns to him. “And you… I realized after your accident that I can’t bear to live a second without you. We’re already inseparable, but it’s starting to feel like not even that is enough.”

The younger boy is already tearing up, Minho’s next move is obvious to him, he’s sure.

The brunet pulls a velvet box out of his pocket, opening it as he kneels down. “Han Jisung, I can’t live another second knowing you’re not my husband. Please, I’m begging-“

“You don’t have to beg,” Jisung interrupts, one fat tear rolling down his cheek.

“Don’t interrupt, asshole,” Changbin barks. Everyone around them laughs. 

Minho clears his throat again, continuing as if he hadn’t heard any of that. “I’m begging you to marry me.”

“Minho-of course. Obviously. No fucking shit.” Jisung throws himself down at the older boy, knocking them over as he presses their lips together in pure desperation.

Minho laughs into the kiss, blindly feeling for the younger boy’s hand before he slips the ring onto his finger.

It takes two of their friends to peel the two apart, lifting them off of the ground before they get carried away.

A few months ago Minho was scared shitless that he’d lose the love of his life, now he’s doing everything he can to pull him closer. He doesn’t want to know a second without this man. 

As the sun disappears beneath the horizon. The eight of them chatter excitedly about wedding plans. There’s no other life Minho wants to live than this one. 

[echoghost1]

InvisoBang 2023 - Dawn Of Influence - Chapter 7

Title: Dawn Of Influence Chapter 7 Title: Thinking About It Makes It Worse Summary: Danny is in his senior year of high school. His life, even with his still secret half-ghost nonsense, has settled down to a new, but manageable normal. That is until one day he starts to notice something is off. He doesn’t feel right, so he tries to find out what’s going on. His ghost form is changing but he has no idea what it’s changing into or why. Characters: Danny Fenton, Sam Manson, Tucker Foley, Jazz Fenton, Clockwork, Pandora, Frostbite Total Word Count: 17,010 Trigger Warnings & relevant tags: Mystery, Horror, Body Horror, Non-Consensual Body Modification, Ghost King Danny Fenton

You can find my fic on ao3 and read chapter 7 down below the cut!

Ch 1 | Ch 2 | Ch 3 | Ch 4 | Ch 5 | Ch 6 | [you’re here] | Ch 8 | Ch 9 | Ch 10 | Ch 11 | Ch 12

SUPRISE ART!!! o((>ω< ))o I had no idea this one was going to happen at all

Danny sat patiently while the phone rang.

It rang again and his leg started to bounce.

It rang again.

“Oh no,” he muttered.

“What?” Sam asked.

“Voicemail.”

“Hi, you’ve reached Jazz Fenton. I can’t come to the phone right now so please leave a message after the beep.” Jazz’s pre-recorded voice said after the fourth ring.

“Uh, Hi. It’s me.” Danny started awkwardly. He did not plan for what to say if this went to voicemail. 

What was he supposed to say here?

He can’t just say his new arms grew in. What if someone else here’s this?

“I, uh, you said to call, if it uh, happened? And it happened. So I’m calling you. Bye.”

He hung up as quickly as he could and just stared at the wall ahead of him.

Voicemails were the worst.

Tucker patted his knee sympathetically, “Good job buddy. Nice and vague. Keep ‘em guessing.”

“I didn’t know how else to say it without saying it,” he whined.

“We should really get better at code words or something,” Sam said with a shake of her head.

Danny slouched in his seat, “Those only work if everybody knows what the codes are.”

“He’s not wrong.” Tucker agreed.

Sam just rolled her eyes.

“Now what?” Danny asked.

“I could order the pizza and we can go back to the movie while we wait for her to call back?” Sam suggested.

Both Danny and Tucker nodded in agreement.

“So one Veggie and one,” she gagged playfully, “meat lovers. Anything else?”

“Can we get a Hawaiian with mushrooms and extra olives?” Danny asked.

“Still don’t get that combination, but okay,” Sam noted.

“Also breadsticks, no cheese sticks. Garlic Bread? Yeah.”

“You good?” Tucker asked.

Danny turned to Tucker, “Oh yeah, sorry. I just got really hungry all of a sudden.”

“You did just grow two new limbs today,” Sam said.

“Technically they’ve been growing for weeks. They just finished today.”

“Whatever, I’m ordering now. Go eat some chips or something.” She pointed to the bar on the back wall.

How did he ever forget about the snack bar?

He wandered over to the bar, grabbed an oversized bowl, and just started adding a little bit of everything. Potato chips, pretzels, hot Cheetos, veggie chips, baby carrots, some gummy worms, both sour and regular, and to top it all off, he drizzled some chocolate sauce on top.

Despite being totally okay with sharing his snack mix, his friends did not want any. He didn’t get why, it was delicious. 

Oh well, more for him.

They kept the movie paused until the pizza arrived just in case Jazz called back while they waited.

Once they had their food they figured they might as well finish the movie. 

After devouring most of his snack and half of a pizza Danny got himself nice and comfortable on the couch. He did not want to move anymore today. 

The familiar sounds of the movie mixed with a full stomach and a very comfortable couch, Danny was asleep before he knew it.

Of course, he didn't know he had fallen asleep until he was woken up.

"Oh sorry dude," Tucker apologized. "I didn't mean to wake you."

Danny wasn’t quite awake enough for words so he just focused on blinking the bleariness out of his vision. 

"You sure he’s actually awake?" Sam whispered to Tucker.

"I can call back later." Jazz said.

When did his sister get here? 

Oh wait, she said call.

That's right! He was waiting to talk to her!

Now that he was fully awake, he reached for the phone in Tucker’s hand. 

"Never mind, he's up," Tucker said before handing Danny his phone. 

Danny placed the phone to his ear and started to pace as he spoke. Partly to wake himself up and partly because of the things he was about to talk about.

“You got my message?” Danny asked.

“I did receive it, yes. Not really sure what you were saying but did get it.”

Danny sighed, “It wasn’t that bad was it?”

“I get you want to keep things private but I literally had no idea what you were trying to say. I spent like twenty minutes trying to figure it out before I called.”

He didn’t really know what to say to that, so he kept quiet.

“Anyway, I’m assuming it’s important since you called.”

“Yeah, it’s just um,” he paused and looked at his friends, they were keeping busy by trying to pick what movie to watch next.

He walked to the bathroom and leaned against the counter, “My arms came in.” he said simply.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” he said with a shrug she couldn’t see.

“Are you near a mirror?”

“Uh, yeah. Why?”

“I think you should take a look at yourself in the mirror.”

He turned around and faced the mirror. 

Blue eyes looked back.

Fenton looked back.

A little tired, hair a bit of a mess, lanky.

The same as he always looked.

He shifted into his ghost form.

His aura reflected off the chrome and tile making the room even brighter. He considered turning the lights off but stopped himself.

Standing in the dark wasn’t the point.

He kept staring himself in the eyes.

“Danny?”

“Hmm?”

“Tell me what you see.”

“Green eyes, white hair. teeth.” he hesitated, “fangs.”

“Keep going.”

He reached up and touched the tip of his ear, “pointy ears,” his gaze drifted to his hands, his gloves had changed since he had last seen them. They were fingerless gloves now. He guessed that was better than being stretched out or ripped apart, “claws.”

“What color?”

“Dark green. It keeps getting darker.”

“It’s okay, Danny. Look back in the mirror.”

He didn’t know how she knew he wasn’t looking but he did what she asked. He locked eyes with himself again.

“Keep your eyes on your reflection and look down. Slowly.”

He swallowed but did as she asked. Maybe a little too slowly. He wasn’t sure.

He didn’t really want to see it.

His new hands, the lower set, were gripping the edge of the counter.

His hands were pitch black.

Why did they keep doing that?

What did it mean?

“Danny breathe.”

It wasn’t until she said something that he realized he wasn’t breathing normally.

He closed his eyes and pulled his hands away from the counter.

“Can I turn back now?”

He wasn’t really sure why he was asking.

“Go ahead.”

He took a breath and sat on the floor as the rings of his transformation washed over him.

“You did good, little brother.”

“Did I?” He looked at his hand, his normal human hand. It sure didn’t feel like he did good.

“You want me to come home this weekend?”

“What? No, I’m fine!” he answered a little too quickly.

“If you don’t want me to start driving right now, you should tell me why you didn’t want to look.”

“I never said I didn’t.”

“You didn’t need to.”

He could hear her bed creak as she stood up.

“Where are you going?”

“Where do you think?”

He heard her keys scrap against something wooden, probably her desk.

“Jazz seriously, you don’t need to drive all the way here.”

She jiggled her keys by the phone to make sure he heard.

She couldn’t just come home for this, there was no need for that.

“I don’t know! It was weird.”

The keys stopped jingling.

“What was weird?”

“It’s just,” he sighed as he tried to think of how to explain it. “It’s like the accident all over again.”

“How so?”

He floated upwards so he could still sit but also see himself. “When I looked into the mirror the first time and saw green where there should have been blue I,” he stopped.

“You what?” she pressed.

He closed the door and sat back on the floor again.

“I didn’t know who I was looking at. There was a stranger there. He almost looked like me but he wasn’t.” 

He pulled his knees up to his chest and kept going, “That’s why it was so easy to go by Phantom. New name for my new face. I got used to it obviously. I’ll get used to this too I guess.”

“But you don’t want to?”

“Why would I? Why should I? Why do I keep changing? Why do I keep getting weirder? Why can’t I just be normal?”

He took a breath and apologized.

“You don’t need to apologize. I don’t mind listening.”

“Thanks.”

“Have you talked to your friends about this?”

“Why?”

“Because they are your friends?”

“It’ll just start a fight.”

“Why?”

“They don’t get it. They never have.”

“Never?”

“Not when I first turned into a ghost and not now that I’m turning into a monster.”

“You’re not a monster Danny.”

“You sure about that? Because the fangs, claws, and extra set of arms beg to differ. And of course, let’s not forget the added bonus of the literal horns that are still coming in!” 

He stood up and started to pace in the cramped bathroom. “Because being a ghost wasn’t bad enough now I get to look like a demon. Just what I always wanted.”

“Just because you look different, doesn't change who you are.”

“Easy for you to say!”

He has no idea what her reply to that is because he doesn't just hang up on her, he crushes his phone in his fist.

He doesn't need to look in the mirror to know his eyes are green.

He shouldn’t have gotten so angry.

He shouldn’t have shouted.

He regretted breaking his phone.

He tossed the useless tech into the trash and walked out of the bathroom.

His friends make a good attempt at looking away as if they weren’t just eavesdropping.

“Can one of you message Jazz and say I’m sorry?”

Tucker squinted at him from his seat on the couch, “Why can’t you do it?”

Danny just smiled nervously.

“Oh my god, you broke your phone?! How did you do that?”

“I held it too tightly?”

“Geez maybe keep a better eye on that strength of yours. You already broke the bathroom earlier.” Sam teased.

Even though it didn’t really feel like a tease.

Because he had broken things. The tile wall was busted because of him. The shower curtain was damaged because of him. The tub was dented because of him.

All he did was break things.

He ruined everything he touched.

How did that not make him a monster?

[stitchkiss]

tell me a story about u

bestie you know more of my stories than anyone and you still want more?? i can’t believe you aren’t sick of them yet lmaoo. i’ll tell you a few from that liam-esque list i sent you a while back.

GATHER ROUND KIDS!! STORYTIME!!

story 1: idek when this was probably when i was like 13 but anyway we were gardening n shit and i was by all the tools takin a break bc i planted like 20 zucchini seeds (bad idea in hindsight all we ate that summer was zucchini) and i was tired. so i look down and there’s a garden hoe next to me and i’m getting flashbacks to my childhood when i watched tom and jerry obsessively and i think “huh. i wonder what would happen if i stepped on it” guess what happened. smacked me right in the face the second i stepped on it. blood went everywhere. face, clothes, tools, soil. brother is laughing. sister rushing for towels. mom making sure my nose wasn’t broken. dad wishing i was never born. my face messy with tears n blood n sweat. i consider this a win bc not only did i get to live out a childhood fantasy but i didn’t have to garden for the rest of the day!

story 2: i am. dumb. and impulsive. and i think movie magic applies to me. all this, but i’m 9 years old. we had just moved and a perk was that a golf cart came w the house. so when, for reasons i can’t remember, there was a dirt hill in my backyard i knew EXACTLY what to do with it bc i had just watched wreck it ralph AND played a mario kart tournament the night before so i know a ramp when i see one. see where im going w this? when i saw the dirt hill i got on the golf cart and fuckin floored it. the thing is, i didn’t know that the dirt wasn’t packed in, so it was too soft for the tires. i did not make it over. the cart tipped over and i fell out. it almost crushed me. the funniest part ab this is when my mom came over to check on me she was like “i saw you speed off and i KNEW what you were doing” i wasn’t allowed to try it again.

3. i had a goldfish named herbert. i won him at a festival when i was like 12 and he came in a plastic baggie like from finding nemo. so i brought him home and i quickly realized i had no place to put him bc he was my first (and only) fish. so i threw out these flowers my mom had in this really big vase and i put him in it instead. during this time i didnt have a phone bc i accidentally broke it a few days before when i was jump roping and had it in my pocket and it flew out. SO i didn’t know what to feed herbert bc no google and neither did anyone else and they didn’t want to help me raise my new son so i had to figure this out by myself. do you know what i fed him instead of fish food? ritz crackers. how tf was i supposed to know the salt from the crackers would kill him. the concept of “freshwater fish” eluded me at the time. i woke up the next day and he was floating at the top of the vase. but the worst part of this story? i was preparing a small, intimate funeral for herbert bc he deserved nothing less and i took him out of the vase and put him on a plate. then i left for like 5 minutes to make sure my brother and sister were going to be in attendance and to throw some rose petals in the toilet bc if i was gonna flush him it might as well be beautiful. but. when i went back to the kitchen to get herbert, my cat was eating him.

4. last story! my cousins and i are really close and we do this thing when all of us are available and we call it a version of guy’s grocery games based on who the judge is that night (we replace the g with our initial) where we each make food but change it up in a creative way. this time was pizza. i teamed up w one of my cousins and we decided to make a pizza based off the fast food chain raising canes. so we go to canes and order a bunch of chicken and fries and bread and we even got a cup full of canes sauce for $5 and we also bought a premade pizza dough. the pizza was DIVINE and i’d eat it again but be warned you need pepto bismal on hand if you eat it bc it’ll rly fuck up ur insides. but, even tho it was the best invention ever, we didn’t fucking win. what did we lose to, you ask? a ramen pizza. my brother and his gf made it w the recipe I SENT HIM!! but the thing is, this recipe called for soy sauce and my cousin is allergic to soy. my brother asked me for his allergy list in preparation and i forgot to put it on there. so my cousin was ab to take a bite when my brain connected the very very important dots and i smacked it out of his hand.

hope u enjoyed all that!!

[steele-soulmate]

Tattooed Wings, CHAPTER 586, Peter Steele & OFC, Soulmate AU

SUMMARY: Mary Claire Bradley meets her soulmate- literally- the famous Peter Steele of metal group Type O Negative. But will obstacles including trauma, stalkers, and toxic family members get in the way of their life?

WARNING: mentions of child rape (nothing graphic) PTSD, milk kink, soft smut, grinding, assault, fingering, hand jobs, blow jobs, 69, P in V sex, blood, noncon rape, violence, death, vandalism, graffiti, attempted kidnapping, break-ins, wild animal attacks, terrorist attack (sabotage) consensual impregnation, bareback, impregnation kink, creampies, terrorist attacks (shootings) hit and run pedestrian accident, precipitous labor, neonatal death, abandoned baby, child intoxication, death of a minor character

A NOTE FROM THE AUTHORESS:

I’m going to be taken an undisclosed break from writing Tattooed Wings. If you want to reach me, come find me on Tumblr at @steele-soulmate.

WORDS: 1156

 “Hello, hello, hello again, mama and mama’s family!” Ken Anderson greeted the family as we all trooped into the Paper News Theater, eager (as per usual) for the day of rehearsals for the new Ken Anderson musical. “How is everyone doing today?”

“Exhausted!” I told him with a smile as Peter quickly set up a collapsible play pen to dump the babies into in order to keep them all corralled and in one place. “The triplets are teething, as I’m quite sure you may have guessed already.”

The famed Broadway director only came over to affectionately pat the heads of all the tiny little babies before going straight over to chit chat with the pianist accompanist, who had just arrived moments after the Ratajczyk clan trooped in. I meanwhile, took the opportunity to fold myself onto the floor and begin to stretch, welcoming in Elizabeth and Katie as the two girls followed after their mommy.

After Ken Anderson had handed out new sheet music that he wanted us to run through that day, the cast began to bump our way through Disney’s The Nightmare Before Christmas- A Broadway Tale. And so, we all began to go over our lines and assigned songs with laughter and chatter in between.

When lunchtime rolled around, everyone found out that Ken Anderson had placed an order for at least two hundred boxes of pizzas with either pepperoni, all the meats, extreme cheese, or all the veggies toppings, at least eighty boxes of garlic bread, at least sixty boxes of chicken wings with blue cheese dressings, at least fifty boxes of parmesan zucchini sticks, wrapped meatball subs and individual sized cartons of pasta salad. For those with dietary restrictions, he had thoughtfully purchased dairy free, meat free or vegan boxes. I couldn’t help but notice that Elizabeth had requested a box of vegan prepared foods while Katie piled on all of the meats onto her plate.

“Elizabeth, you don’t like meat anymore?” I asked her in a soft voice as she came over to sit next to me.

“I’m trying to go vegan, mommy,” she explained, pulling apart her cheese pizza. “I really don’t enjoy the idea of me eating an animal that was bread to be slaughtered for human consumption.”

“Ah, okay.” This was the first time that I was hearing about this as Peter was feeding the babies each a skinny strip of cheese pizza.

“Though I’m not asking you to go out and buy vegan food for me- that stuff is expensive,” she continued to speak around bites of food. “But when I start to get an allowance, maybe I can chip into buying food and get a few vegan substitutes for me?”

“That sounds agreeable to me,” I agreed after a moment of thinking. “I do believe that there is a vegan supermarket nearby the house- we can run by there and have a look-see at what all they offer, how does that sound?”

“Hey sweetheart, I couldn’t help but overhear you,” Peter interjected, looking up from his plate, piled high with a generous amount of food. “But what do you think of the kids having their own bank accounts and cards where we can just deposit money into instead of just giving them cold, hard earned cash?”

“And teach them how to adult in their lives?” I hummed in an agreeing tone of voice. “Why hadn’t I thought of that?”

“Because even super mommies have fart days,” Elizabeth deadpanned.

Ken Anderson, who was passing by with his arms full of stand in props, dropped everything and had to sit down from laughing so hard.

“Oh Elizabeth? I hope you’re happy now,” I poked at the dragon. “You broke Ken Anderson.”

“It was my pleasure,” she said, getting another strong wheeze out from the African American man.

I shot my daughter a dirty look, telling her to calm down, which she did do with a sheepish squeak.

Katie finished eating her third plate of food, standing to go grab more.“That’s enough food now, mo stór,” I clucked at her. “You are not allowed to get urpy, you hear me?”

“Yes mommy,” she agreed, collecting plates from all around her as she trotted off to the trash can to go and dump everything.

All the tiny, little babies- Baby Tommy, Baby Noah, Baby Eve, Baby Mattie, Baby Teddy and Baby Jojo- were toddling all over inside the baby play pen, looking absolutely adorable as they bopped along to the piano music and babbled softly to themselves and their little baby dollies.

“Hey, I’m sorry, but can I please leave my son with you?”

I smiled sweetly at the ensemble member, who had been wrestling with a fussy little man for much of the rehearsal day, watching as she settled the cranky little man in with the Ratajczyk babies before rejoining the run through of ‘This is Halloween’ as the opening number.

“Boys and girls of every age Wouldn't you like to see something strange? Come with us and you will see This, our town of Halloween”

“Hall-a-weenie!” yelled out Baby Tommy, cackling gleefully as someone plucked him from the play pen and everyone began to worship him as though he was the Pumpkin King of Halloweentown.

Oh Baby Tommy, I thought as I saw Peter taping the adorable event with his cell phone. You are such an icon.

Mo stór, my dear, Irish Gaelic 

TAGLISTS ARE OPEN/ ASK BOX IS OPEN/ REQUESTS ARE OPEN/ PLOT BUNNIES ARE WELCOMED

If you liked this, then please consider buying me a coffee HERE It only costs $3!!!

PETER STEELE TAGLIST

@rock-a-noodle

@ch3rry-c01a

[jodilin65]

We have survived! The old flagpole that was here when we moved in got knocked down, the car was pushed a few inches, and the AC broke—but we’re alive. Thankfully, the AC is under warranty, but we still have to pay a hundred bucks just to have someone come check it out. They can’t come until Tuesday, so I’m grateful we have the portables—one in the bedroom and another in the living room. Funny, because just the other day, I thought they were a waste of money. Now they’re lifesavers!

I’m surprised the AC broke, though. I thought we had at least 10 to 15 years before we’d have a problem. I noticed something was off as soon as I got up. I could hear it running, but there was no air coming out of the vents. But then again, I’m not that surprised. When you have money, you stay afloat like we used to, but when you’re poor, there’s no getting ahead. Moving out west to the desert to develop our own land and build a new house is starting to feel more like a fantasy than a reality. I just don’t see how we can pull it off. On top of that, I’m just not as healthy as I used to be.

Hurricane Milton wreaked havoc across Florida. It sounded scary out there at times, but all we could do was wait it out by candlelight. We were without power for 14.5 hours, and stepping out onto the lanai felt like stepping into a war zone. Nearly 20 tornadoes spawned from the storm, and it’s a good thing we didn’t go to Port St. Lucie after all! That area, Fort Pierce, and others were hit hard by the tornadoes. Even someone’s carport near the entrance was taken down. As frustrating as things are for us, it could have been much worse—we definitely couldn’t afford to fix a carport! Where we’re situated, I think tornadoes are a bigger threat than hurricanes.

At one point, there was a lull in the wind and rain, and I could hear dogs barking in the neighboring subdivision. I couldn’t believe it—who leaves their dogs outside in the middle of a fucking hurricane?! It’s bad enough to treat dogs like outdoor decor instead of pets, but to leave them out in a storm? Even though I can barely hear them down here, it amazes me that no one does anything about it. How do their owners or neighbors even sleep?

During the night, I was in touch with Irma and Toni on and off and others. It was still stressful, and I could have used some lorazepam at the time. Putting the therapist on hold for now, though. The most important thing is dealing with my sleep apnea. I have been able to get a little more sleep, which helps (until something fucks it up again). I slept a little over 7 hours yesterday, and almost 8 hours today.

Looks like Kathy decided to ghost me, even though I don’t know why. We weren’t arguing or anything. Oh, well. Her choice. Besides, nothing really surprises me these days. I don’t do do-overs, and I have a hard no-forgive rule. So unless it’s turned out she’s been hacked, she can’t come back into my life. I can’t even access her other account, so I’d say that yeah, I’ve been blocked. sighs I’ll never again have a friend like Aly.

I got a couple of shelves to put by the built-in desk in front, but they’re delayed. I also ordered a 12-piece wax sampler for $6.

We lost even more money because we had to throw some food out because of the power outage. I could have been smart and pulled some chicken or fish out of the freezer and made that up with veggies, but instead, when Tom wanted to Dominoes, I got a pizza and some lava cakes, and they made me feel kind of yucky. My heart raced and I sugar crashed. I’ve been eating horribly unhealthy for the last few days now. Because of the hurricane, we got a lot of pantry stuff, so I’ve had more bread than I eat in a year.

[worst-family-heirloom]

Bread is Life

Bread is life, my religion teachers and the priest say. Or something like that. “This is my body. Partake of it.”

I can’t remember how old I was the year my mom decided I was too chubby to eat bread. Seven? I was older than five, because it was after we moved.

This is my body. Whittle it down.

I had to eat rice cakes and meal replacement shakes instead.

To this day, I cannot articulate the loathing I have for meal replacement shakes to people who do not have the world’s worst family heirloom, even though when things are bad again, (because they do get bad again, as hard as I try to hang on with my now-harder fingernails to my grip on an existence where I can simply eat without a Rube-Goldbergesque process playing in my mind and on the kitchen floor) I think it would be nice to drink a big bottle of glorified chocolate milk and go “eh, close enough” and then crawl back into bed.

Instead, I simply cannot let it get that bad again. I live in an apartment now, and I think every pizza place in this country that I know of is on the boycott listen. Israel is committing genocide; the least I can do, less than the least I can do, is manage to have it together enough not to do this.

Bread is life, says the priest.

At some point in grade school (so, relatively little, sixth grade, I think, but apparently not little enough) I am picked to read a catechism. I am questioning my faith, but my commitment to having my ego stroked is unquestionable. I say yes.

The priest invites me and the other kids to have cake with him when we talk in the church. I am the only one of the kids who says “no.”

I feel proud of myself. I also feel, vaguely, that something is wrong.

“What kind of kid says no to cake?” The kind who has such glaringly obvious anorexia, I wish someone had saved me.

One Valentine’s Day, my mother visits my class.

Something is so very wrong with me I end up doing jumping jacks in a supply closet in my little Catholic school I tell my mom I am embarrassed. She says I shouldn’t be, for burning it off, or wanting to. The sense that maybe something is wrong, very wrong, is stronger. I might have been younger. I can’t remember.

Maybe it is because we are in a supply closet, but I think it is more because

children are property, and no-one knows how to take me away, or where to put me.

This is OK. I am all grown up now, and no-one saved me. I cannot play this over and over and try to find the good path out without something like family abolition, and not even my OCD can try to find a way around that.

This is not a feel good story where I got better. I got better; and then I got sick in other, permanent ways. If you spend your childhood trying to be small in order to be treated like a human being worthy of connection, it turns out you will spend some of your adulthood this way too.

There is not an iteration of me who did not catch COVID, because that iteration of me had to be loved like a person and not an idea of one, and she does not exist.

My computer is broken. If it weren’t, I would probably be writing a Hazbin fanfic about cannibalism and transubstantiation for today, as I am, as a friend put it “entertainingly predictable.”

A man in holy robes says I am going to Hell for not loving right tells me bread is life, God is life, and I must eat His body. I am allowed to eat Him. It is my duty to eat Him. It is my privilege to eat Him.

And I’m supposed to be normal about that?

I left the Church and my mother, flat circles of Eucharists and rice cakes, first one and then the other, as I grew up.

I am allowed to grow sideways now too.

(This is not a mean joke in my mother’s house anymore. This is simply a fact of life in my apartment, where my posters and postcards cover the walls and I’m constantly cleaning chip debris from underfoot)

I don’t think there is anything holy about eating toast off paper plates in my flat, standing by the counter after smearing it in vegan pesto or cheese.

It’s just life.

[ajoytobeheld]

Food review: European tour March 2010, part two

March 27th, 2010

Welcome to the second instalment of Team LC! eating their way across Mainland Europe.

In Part one we tried Schnitzel, Moroccan Stew and Strudel.  What can the Low Countries and Paris offer us?

Amsterdam

First port of call in Amsterdam was a cafe (not a coffee shop!) called Pasta Tricolore.  After touring America with our coffee guru/ tour manager Joe, I have become more fussy about coffee.  This place on the recommendation of Tom did pretty good coffee and the food was great.  I have quite a sweet tooth when it comes to desserts and so I went for a piece of Tiramisu.  It was rich and creamy, you could taste the Marsala and coffee in the sponge fingers.  This was a great way to have a break between setting up and soundcheck.

The last time we played the Melkweg I’m sure we didn’t get catering there.  This time we ate in the cafe.  I went for the Tilapia, a white meaty fish that is quite popular in North America.  It came breaded with a lemon and cream sauce.  There wasn’t that much of it but  it was quite filling.  The breadcrumbs were a bit soggy and the sauce was quite thick, the consistency being as thick as mustard for example.  It came with some fried potatoes and some crunch vegetables.

The first time I did the Nijmegen Marches I had chips with Mayonnaise.  If you’ve ever had Dutch Mayo its very different from Hellmans.  It seems to have a little bit of spice in it that makes it moorish.   Every time I come to Holland now I have to get some.  After the show I snuck off to Febo’s round the corner and got some.  It was everything I could ever want in Chips and Mayo!  The salty chips covered in a thick layer of creamy Mayo.  If you don’t like Mayo, try the peanut sauce, it has a similar taste to curry.

Paris

Paris, the food capital of the world, or so they say.  I know French cooking is great but it is a different style to British or say Mexican.  Nothing beats a Sunday Roast cooked by your mum.

The meal tonight was in the cafe bar attached to the venue.  They had served me a mediocre coffee earlier that day.  The food was a vegan curry and then a plate of curried chicken.  The chicken was very flavoursome as it was still on the bone.  Thighs and legs are under-rated, all those flavours encased in the bone come out during that slow cooking, the meat falling off it faster than melted butter.  The curry was good, but the flavouring was very much one of those bulk standard “curry powder” flavours you buy from a supermarket.  Some fresh coriander would have been great.  They gave us a dessert of what seemed to be a lemon flavoured custard tart; rich but the lemon giving it a refreshing edge.

Hamburg

A kebab shop is not where you go for a meal in Britain.  However, this is not the same in Europe.  After a 9 hour drive, I found myself in a kebab shop sitting down with a lamb kebab and a stein of beer.  This kebab is not what you’ll find in your British take away.  The meat was fresh, spicy and had a lot of flavour.  It had a nice smokey flavour from being cooked over coals rather than on a griddle.  It came with a flat bread and a salad.  More importantly, I got to enjoy it on a plate and not out of a polystyrene box.

The following night, the venue got us take away from an Italian.  It was the worst pizza I’ve had in a long time.  The base was burnt with holes in it.  The sausage on the top was so salty that you couldn’t taste anything else.  A grease fest!

Brussels

The Botanique has always done good food, so we were looking forward to ending the tour here.  Time meant that we ended up eating afterwards.  We had ordered before we had gone on thinking that it would be waiting for us when we came off.  Due to this I had opted for the chicken and chips rather than the fish.  When we got to the cafe they hadn’t even cooked it, too late to change my order though.  When it arrived it was basically just a chicken breast grilled with some chips and salad.  The breast was a bit dry and it could have done with some sort of flavourings.  But I was hungry.  We’ve had better, perhaps it us wanting to eat afterwards that annoyed them?

A few prizes

Best Meal – The kebab in Hamburg

Worst Meal – The pizza in Hamburg

Best Services – Marche – found widely in Germany

Worst Services – Shell Garages in Holland and Belgium

[sufferinginsuburbiaxo]

I thought things were better but they are worse than ever. I think it’s time to go back to living like a hermit and not going out looking like a flaming pile of garbage in public. Here’s a run down of last night.

5pm: my friend comes over so we can start getting ready for our night out. My husband orders pizza, pasta and garlic bread. He and my friend eat, drink ciders…I have had nothing to eat all day, and have nothing, not a bite.

6pm: meet up with our other friends, get photos of us girls together. At which point I realise what a terrible outfit choice I made. The dress enhances my ugliest feature that I hate the most (my bust). I look fucking hideous. And want to cry. I think a large bust is extremely unattractive. I have a small frame but sport an F cup. It is an absolute curse because it adds 10kgs to my frame. And makes me look older and fatter than I actually am. I despair. My night is ruined because I can barely concentrate on enjoying my friends company because all I can think of is how horrid I look. And that everyone else probably feels bad for me that I made such an unfortunate outfit choice…

7pm: cocktails are being served. I go for the gin cocktail because it’s the lowest calorie option. Feeling like death and dead inside. Then there’s a champagne tower and I have a glass of some very nice champagne.

8pm: everyone sits down for dinner. My husband swaps his meal with me because it’s a smaller portion of very lean meat and low carb vegetables. He knows me well and is very good at doing damage control.

9pm. it gets really cold and I’m fucking freezing. My friend bought a massive fur coat for me to wear and I’m relieved. I put it on and instantly feel much better because no one can see how disgusting my body looks. Dessert is served. Apple turnover and ice cream. Everyone insists that I at least try it. I have a mouthful and want to cry because there’s no way I could let myself eat the whole thing. In fact the thought is mortifying. I lie and say I’m full from dinner.

12am. get home, go to bed and toss and turn all night about the outfit choice I made and how hungry I am.

FML.