#smithers baby boy you are so fucked up <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[gregmarriage]

FUNNIEST SCENE EVER ACTUALLY

[bossbex]

5x05 Reaction

WOW it’s been a while since I did an episode reaction post.  I’M EXCITED ABOUT THIS SHOW AGAIN!!!

The bughead walk home.  I liked this! I liked how it was awkward.  WHAT WAS IN THE VOICEMAIL??? Does Jughead even know what’s in the voicemail? 

Varchie walk home.  Cute! Friendly.  Was getting zero romantic, or even tense vibes.  He tells her that he hasn’t been in a relationship since her, which completely makes sense considering he’s been in the army since high school.  He didn’t say he hasn’t been with anyone, just that he hasn’t been in a relationship.  

Ok how old are the twins? Shouldn’t they be like 10? Alice is talking about them like they’re babies lmao “shhh, I just got them down”

Poor sad Jug.  I actually really like this turn for him... reminds me of S1 Jughead which was honestly the last time I really loved his character?? And obviously they are setting him up to be at his lowest so he can only go up from here (with a few bumps, probably) 

Kevin and Betty friendship YES!!! HOW is Betty only going through Charles’ stuff NOW, 7 years later after he was discovered to be a serial killer? I know it’s obviously just so she can play the Polly tape which is relevant to the plot of this episode and we shouldn’t be asking more questions but COME ON

Veronica and Hiram... this seems... repetitive... but I liked what happened with her character by the end of this episode. 

BOSS TONI I AM OBSESSED!!! And I love that they are all mad about his book, it’s great.  “You mean, the Vipers?” LMAO

AND MORE BOSS TONI!!! THEY’VE BEEN WASTING HER FOR 3 SEASONS SHE IS AMAZING

And Archie back to savior mode, we love to see it.  

Jugitha? Tabhead? I like their banter.  I’m into it.  I’m just really hoping that they don’t use another WOC as a plot device for Jughead to get back with Betty. If it happens, make it meaningful.  

MORE BOSS TONI!!! I love that Toni has never once strayed from her morals... no amount of money is going to make her screw over a bunch of students and work for Hiram lodge. 

“It used to be Kevin and I would sneak peaks through that window, hoping you were shirtless” BETTY YOU ARE SHAMELESS (also I absolutely LOVE a pilot reference) 

Wtf is Reggie doing.  Will he have a redemption arc? I really hope so! Like that he was blackmailed into working for Hiram and he is protecting his family in some way? Or something? Or maybe they have decided that he’s just “bad” now.  His hair is certainly bad...

Ok so Veronica is looking at getting a job as a... sports agent?? In LA?? Ok, Riverdale.  Sure.  And I guess she’s just done with Chad? Which ok, sure, that guy’s awful.  

SMITHERS LIVES!!!!!!!!!!

Lmao of course Monica Posh is back.  And this guy just casually has $30K cash laying around? Sounds legit.  

Ok I really thought the Betty gun scene was going to be Archie but turns out it’s Polly! Which I am happy to see!!! So it seems like Alice and Polly are bitter with Betty for “abandoning” them... which like, I don’t think that going to school and getting a job in a different state is “abandoning” your family.  But it does sound like Betty doesn’t call much and basically hasn’t been back to Riverdale since she left for college? Which is like... kinda shitty.  I wonder if that will be delved into a bit more.  Oh, who am I kidding, I know what show I’m watching.  

Toni at the Cooper house? Toni and Alice team up?? We love to see it!!!  

Ok Jughead lying about staying at the 5 seasons and actually staying in the bunker is just the saddest thing ever.  

Ok, I LOVE Tabitha?? “I think I’d remember a weird-ass name like that” LMAO. I Also love that she called the guy “pumpkin” in response to him calling her “sweetie” lol.  So good.  

Veggie comeback?? I miss them!!! But his hair... I can’t get past his hair. 

I actually love this plot point with Polly being involved with the Ghoulies and that being what gets Betty passionate about the raid (she had already offered help but now she’s IN)

The Betty and Archie arm touch? “You good?” I CAN’T

Can Kevin ever say a line without being interrupted? That’s just a running gag now lol.  I did enjoy the Succession reference though.  AND MORE BOSS TONI like seriously it’s so good.  

Ok I love how the plot point of Riverdale “going private” exists solely to allow all the main characters to become teachers there without having any teaching qualifications whatsoever LMAO.  Sure yes ok.  

I feel like Veronica should be asking her mom for help with Chad and not her dad? Wouldn’t she be more experienced in that side of things? Oh wait, we’re not supposed to ask questions about logic of storylines.  I do like the Hiram refused her help and brought up the scene “7 years ago” where she compared him to a dog, lol.  

Ok I feel like Betty is justified in questioning Polly about lying about where she’s working at the drugs (and since when has she ever done anything sensitively or discreetly?) and Polly is also justified in being defensive about it and thinking it’s none of Betty’s business since she hasn’t been around.  You know who’s business it IS, though? ALICE’S!!! Maybe Alice is overcompensating for sending Polly to SoQM years ago but she is all kinds of enabling her now.  

BARCHIEEEEEEEEEEEEE I could write a whole post on this.  Maybe I should? THE TENSION!! THE AKWARDNESS!!! “Cool” ---ARCHIE WAS SO NERVOUS WITH HER!!! THE SHOWER!!! OF COURSE BETTY CAN’T GO NEXT DOOR AND SHOWER AT HOME THAT WOULD BE TOO LOGICAL!!! THE LOOK THEY GIVE EACH OTHER THEY BOTH JUST FUCKING KNOW!!! THAT WAS SUCH A LONG AND EXPLICIT SEX SCENE FOR THE CW!!!!!! I KNEW IT WAS COMING FROM THE PROMO BUT I WAS STILL NOT READY!!!

Ok I’ve caught my breath... thoughts on this: 

This was LONG overdue.  I thought it was perfect.  They are adults, they both wanted each other, there was absolutely nothing in their way, and the show made sure that there was NO ambiguity about what they were doing.  They fucked in the shower, that’s it.  Some other notes - Betty twice in this episode talks about how Archie hasn’t changed - he is STILL the boy she has loved since she was a kid.

AND THEN THE CONVERSATION IMMEDIATELY AFTER!!! This show would normally not even have the characters address it.  We would have gone straight to the Pop’s scene with no discussion. “Something we’ve been wanting to do since high school but never got around to” I SCREAMED.  And their SMILES they are both so happy. I LOVED THIS!!! So we’re getting FWB barchie, great, I’m here for it.  You can see though, by both of their expressions, it’s more than that for both of them.  BETTY’S LIP BITE AT THE END GIRL IS IN LOOOOOVE

Jug’s speech at the retirement party was really good.  

Ok this Choni scene is just lovely.  They are both so soft I’M CRYING. “If our love ever meant anything to you, help us” SOB. 

Betty is the first one to agree to help Archie, noted.

Uh oh, Jughead is going to get in trouble again for writing about all his friends.  Or will he dig his way out of this? 

One last barchie moment TEXTING they are SICK

Jughead and Archie roomies!!! I love this!!! So much potential for tension and akwardness!! 

TL;DR - this episode was GREAT, barchie is HOT, and Toni is BOSS, this dynamic change up was NEEDED

[eternlmisery]

i love pop so much 

HE IS SO CUTE AND CUDDLY STOP

IM GOING TO CRY 

IM THINKING ALL ABOUT THE FOOD 

HAHAHAHA jughead’s look 

he is SO in love 

sheryl is so pretty omgggg

YASSS

hello 

the cooper genes ARE COMING THROUGH 

hahahah THA’TS MY GIRL 

#No1ontranding 

damn this season is so good already 

she doesn’t really give a shit but 

hahahah blackmail and plotting i’m here for it 

oh so cute

literally one picture with her dad

THEY ARE GONNA INTERACT THIS IS SO SWEET 

FP is THE MAN and don’t quesiton it 

V drop yo mom hahah

JUG AND RONNIE IS GOOOD BROMANCE CONTENTTTT 

so sweet

“mrs cooper is right” 

literally 5 mins 

“THE DUDE THAT SHOT MY DAD, KILLED MRS GRUNDY” 

oh cheryl...

well FUCK YOU MAN 

BETTY IS SCARING ME 

CHERYL BETTER COME THROUGH GIRLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

Fp looks amazing in this suit ya!!

JONES BUY HUGGGGGGGGG

i LOVE THEM 

I may have teared up 

my kids 

alice... elizabeth 

hahahahshe is so fucking amazing 

“obitchuary” 

JOSIE! 

josie is so cute! 

OMG MY GIRLS! <3 

I LOVE THEM! 

YEAH BOY! 

CHERYL! 

THIS IS EXCITING!

also a little cringey im sorry but i cant control myself 

i cringe at the slightest of things and i cant help it 

ARCHIE YOU ARE RUINING OUR NIGHT hahaha

oh my god 

did she say daddy-o? please... no

they are adorable 

oh look 

its literally riverdale most hated couple they will fuck up just WAIT FOR IT 

he is so happy ah 

he has money again? 

i want alice to be bitchy about it 

OH NO 

IT’S MY BOYS

MEMEMEMEMEMEMEME

LITERALLY ME GETTING RECEIPTS

THEY ARE SO CUTEE

HAHAHAHAHAH

stopp cheryl power!couple 

i love my kids 

oh

she has RECIEPTS

hahahah one day out and she has literally so many stories 

also I AM SO HAPPY FOR HIM AND IT’S NOT EVEN REAL 

what the fuck 

WHAT 

i loathe them 

i hate them so much 

what

what 

IT’S JUS THKUJJJJJUTG

your child WILL HATE YOU 

why are they so happy? i hate them 

ah babies now 

i feel like something bad is going to happen real soon 

mass shooting? 

I’M PESSIMISTIC I KNOW 

who is that guy? 

oh my god 

i know where this going 

hahahah

it’s a great home movie mommy 

this is peace? i... don’t think so 

WHAT

WHERE IS SMITHERS 

FUCK YOU GUYS I WANT SMITHERS BACK 

“DAD I HATE YOU, YOU FIRED THE DOORMAN” 

no...

I told you I did not like her 

“DAD WE ARE NOT IN A MOVIE YOU CANT JUST BE CRYPTIC AND THEN HANG UP”

IS THAT ECHO?

WHAT Oh it wasn’t okay 

“i got my receipts betty” 

hahahahah i love alice 

she brings the receipts 

thanks mom 

hahahahahahahahahaha

okay this is the worst mom speech ever and i have heard so many shitty mom speeches

idgaf about dilton gun?

gun? 

i dont care man just pay me 

death is about to happen man 

i can feel it 

"only do drugs and have sex on houses kids” a social message from riverdale

[eternlmisery]

what? hiram? a villain? 

NO

she went there 

yeah well i don’t doubt it at this ppint 

i love veronica’s humor 

also virgin mary’s look is so scary 

man she is... scary 

she is scary 

I DONT FUCKING TOLERATE EMOTIONAL ABUSE 

REGGIE 

SO CUTE

PUSSYCATS <3 

I LOVE YOU SO MUCH BABIES 

josie is so sweet

and reggie is suddenly much sweeter and i think it’s because of me loving melton babe 

I LOVE MY ANDREWS BOYS 

his love for his dad is incredible 

this is so cuteeee

hahahahahahahah classic v

pop is THE BOSS

i would love for more of pop

THIS IS SO SAD STOP 

an amazing transition 

i feel so bad about pop i really love him 

he is just a genuinely sweet man and cares about these people 

mr jugheadd is a conspiracy theorist 

POP IS SUPPORTING THE THEORY 

Just a fucking guy in a mask 

HAHAHAHAHAHAH STOPPPPP

jughead honey stop 

no no

JUG... 

oh my god 

i mean... 

HAHAHAHAHAHAH JUST HER FUCKING EYES LOOK

i am betty and jughead is literally my boyfriend 

drink the milkshake betty 

OH 

drama drama drama 

it’s just a jacket jeez

well i mean puberty? 

OH I’M SO EXCITED TO SEE HIS FAMILY 

ohfuck 

well 

that is conventient for the plot 

i mean his dad is gonna come back RIGHT? RIGHT? 

ah babies 

they are so cute

FINISH YOUR BURGERS THOUGH oh...

cheryl’s make up is ON POINT THO 

WHERE.IS.NANA.ROSE. 

cheryl is going... dark 

i’m here for it though it’s right it’s gonna be interesting 

bloody cast bloooddyyyy casttt

and gifts 

a new wallet? ohhh

poor fucking smithers though he is dealing with all yur shit

stop being cute on the hospital 

thing..?

LOOK AT POP 

STOP 

THIS IS SO CUTE I’M DYING 

I’M CRYING BECAUSE OF FOOD 

POP IS SSO CUTE 

oh there’s a new scene 

okay 

they are all so worried 

did he like not try to do anything? 

archie is me 

like idk bruh just... shoot me i guess? 

they are right man nooo

oh my gosh no 

i personally think he has more important things to do 

like he is a bad guy he has other things to take care of 

oh yeah like thanks for making me a full blown psycho 

and imagine him like flatlining instantly hahahahah

please wipe the red lipstick this is way too weird HAHAHAHAH

scottish music 

and kilts 

and gardens and 

veronica in an amazing dress

AND 

OH NO 

OH 

fucking terrifying blossoms 

and scary mary 

and oh armed robber hi 

“wait guys he doesn’t even go here!” 

OH MY GOSH!!!

FREDDD

he BETTER NOT FREAKING DIE I LOVE HIM 

lipstick stain is gone 

OH I WAS SO WORRIED 

he isn’t even my dad and I was scared

honey things like this don’t just happen

OH SHIT 

THIS IS AESTHETIC ASAP 

YEAH MAMA COOPer w a shotgun 

i have missed my children so much 

THIS COMMUNICATION! 

I LIVE FOR THEM SO MUCH 

THEY ARE SO SEET

I MISSED MY BUGHEAD <3 

the jacket TM 

what? 

WHAT 

IS THIS 

WHAT THE FUCK GUYS 

what 

don’t you have like other places to do this stuff? 

IS HIRAM BACK? PLEASE TELL ME HE’S BACK 

DRAMA GIMME DRAMA ...

oh 

he is so scary man... 

oh my god 

i feel bad for veronica honestly 

is she just gonna be like Judas kissing Jesus 

but in reverse 

they don’t give a shit to be honest 

well hiram is thrilled 

he doesn’t have any expressions really 

YAY MARY IS BACK! 

I really like Mary! 

YOU ARE STILL A TEENAGER WHAT THE HELL

he became something else....

archie fist

NO

NO

NO

NO 

OH MY GOD

GREENDALE 

FUCK THIS 

OH MY GOD 

PEDO GRUNDY 

FUCKING MURDER THAT BITCH 

OH MY GOD 

KILL HER 

SHOOT HER IN THE HEAD 

FUCKING KILLL THAT BITCH 

YES

YES 

YES 

PLEASE

SHOOT HER 

PLEASE 

I am so pleased 

this is the best premiere ever 

thank you hooded guy! 

damn. 

i hatedms grundy.