#slightly religious talk
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I dont feel like myself today. Not in a bad way, i'm fine with feeling like I am someone else, its a nice change, slightly unnerving and scary because I don't want to alarm anyone
I have also misplaced my diary once again, ahah thats very like me! Anywho, I guess i'll just journal here until I find it again
Last night, I had multiple dreams, I can only remember one though. It was about how triangles and angels were related to eachother. Triangles were seen as a type of holy shape, and it was thought that angels must be confined in them.
Which leads me to this totally offtopic realization. By that logic, mimes are technically angels if instead of being trapped in a square box, they're trapped in a triangle.
#diary#angels#mimes#slightly religious talk#i think?#ah how do i trigger tag properly?#this feels unusual to do#i hope i get back to being me very soon#unreality#maybe?#im still unsure of a lot#so theres that#haha!
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I think something i don't often see in discussions about Futa's character is how, if you really take a second, he's kind of a people pleaser
He isn't so in a way like what Mikoto got going on, he does want to be around people of the same interests as him, and you wouldn't think he'd care about anything but authenticity if you stayed with the way he behaves on milgram. It is only when you think about him -in- those social circles he manages to get into that you can see him tweaking lol
I think the closest to see this that we have in milgram itself is that one interaction with Kotoko in which she attempts to debate how prisons respect human rights. Any other time he expressed his opinion/stance on things he was aggressive and maybe condescending to the rest because they disagreed with him, but the second someone agreed? Whole demeanor changed. Suddenly he didn't have much to say anymore and he just parroted Kotoko's words back at her. Why. If he has such a strong personality and mindset, why was someone validating his point enough to shut down his otherwise very firm attitude?
Futa doesn't go as far as to manufacture his every word for it to cause a positive reaction on others from the get go, but he does seek validation all the same. He braces himself for rejection by being loud and obnoxious and harsh until he sees a positive reaction and then is when he does a complete 180 to keep the other person in that place of validation. He is simultaneously completely bad at it though, but I never said he was good at people pleasing. Which connects back to what i've said before about his inability to fit in. Even when he thinks he's doing it right and he sees himself getting validation by people he cares about (in the case of his crime, by mimicking his friendgroup's method of "bringing justice" by calling out someone online, that same friendgroup following along and reinforcing the idea that he was doing it right), he ultimately fails anyway and loses it all over again.
In the end, he's just extremely socially awkward and anxious. It isn't in his nature to reach anyone else's expectations even if he genuinely wants to, so he'll either do what he can within his parameters (mold himself for his friendgroup of people he deems similar to him) or he'll avoid trying altogether because he knows he'll fail (what we see in milgram!)
It also shows how his yearn for a support system (t2 qna + mu's birthday timeline convo) isn't particularly new from his current circumstances, or why the only person he could think of when asked who he would want to see right now was his mom (who left so long ago he barely remembers her). He has just never truly had people that genuinely cared for him no matter what he tried to do to make himself likeable.
#and having this in mind i think i understand why he seems to be “giving in” to amane's beliefs#it isnt solely because of his current vulnerability#it isnt even just to find solace in religion#it is because amane offered him help. in a way shes validating him#and if believing in bullshit like salvation and god will make at least the elementary schooler talk to him sometimes#against being left alone with his thoughts and the voices in the walls#with the track record he has of slightly molding himself and mimicking others#yeahh#and honestly that only means itll backfire even worse! on Him!#in his own words#it is what it isSorry#but no yeah hes fucked. i dont think his religious arc is gonna make shit complicated for anyone else but him#but itll be AWFUL on him#milgram#fuuta kajiyama#fuuta milgram#character analysis#sorta kinda#as always
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Sorry but my thoughts are still on the nature of death in dnd (and other fiction where resurrection is possible), specifically on the implications it has on worldbuilding.
Resurrection magic existing kind of makes for cultural issues that have no parallel in our world. Some of it compares - such as the inherent class divide and tensions when the rich and powerful can literally buy their way out of death (a class divide is a class divide, this just digs the chasm deeper, which I'd love to see explored more in media btw) - but the implications on grief and acceptance are on another level. In our world, there is no bargaining with death. So much of our lives is spent coming to terms with the fact that we will all die one day, and mourning and moving on whenever death strikes near us. We experience stages of grief like denial and rage and bargaining but in the end there is no escaping it, no matter how hard you work or beg or rage. Clinging on can only hurt you. It's pointless. All you can do is move on, and it is so hard.
But if death is conditional. Impermanent. Something that can be defeated with money or power or faith. How do you ever move on. On a societal and cultural level, there should be entire rebellions based around who has access to resurrection. Powerful people offering resurrections as incentive would be all over the place, with desperate people selling their souls and freedom and entire lives to save a loved one. Would soldiers fear dying, seen as disposable, or would they fear being brought back again and again to die eternally on the battlefield?
But on an individual level. Is acceptance of the inevitability of death even possible when it’s no longer inevitable? If you decide that no, you can not give up everything to go pursue resurrection of your child, will you hate yourself? You could save them. Why aren’t you? Why aren’t you doing everything in your power? How much do you hate the people who have this power but won’t offer it freely? If you yourself are brought back from the dead and find out most of your loved ones just, let you go, would you hate them? Would you feel abandoned and betrayed? If you’re watching from the afterlife and see your loved one, who’s been working to get you back, decides to accept your death and move on because they have found new love, would you find a way to fucking haunt them? Oh, you think I only lived for you? That I don’t want life just because I can’t have you, too? How selfish is that. But how selfish would it be to bring someone back only to salve your own feelings of guilt, whether they want to or not? Would there be an entire industry of mediums based on people needing to ask their loved ones if they wish to remain dead or not? How much more powerful would hate and love and hubris be in this world, lacking the absolute limit of death?
#nella talks#long post#i have similar feelings of how worlds with scientifically provable gods would be impacted on a cultural level#bc in our world you can believe however much you want but you can never prove a thing. that's the whole point of faith#but if you could literally ring up a god and ask what happens after death?#how would that impact the nature of faith and religion?#would there still be religious wars if you could just ask gods opinion?#would knowing where you go post death be worse than the freedom of finding whatever internal truth comforts you personally?#can you tell how frustrated i am that so many fantasy stories are entirely disinterested in digging into this stuff#stop writing fantasy worlds that are just historical fiction with magic sprinkled on top#make them weird. make them unearthly. make them alien.#show me just how much society changes when the laws of nature shifts slightly to the left
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you should kill yourself if you spend 12 minutes sorting around your notes on your desk, making sure they look messy but also the prettiest ones are on top, posing your textbook open and having the most "academia" looking web page or lecture slides on your laptop screen before taking a picture and posting it on your social media story while quietly scrolling through songs to put with it.
#every time exam season comes around#people do this religiously#i hate it profusely it's so incredibly vain and pointless#you're like the people who go to the library for an epic study day and set up your big environment#only to sit on your phone for 5 hours#have the humility to be honest about your study habits and what works and what doesn't#i feel like its a form of cognitive dissonance this type of stuff and a form of lying to themselves#which is the one person you should always be brutally honest to#txt#i plan ahead and give myself so much extra time because i know my time efficiency is dogshit and i compensate for that#i try to avoid talking to other people about studying and i try to insulate myself when i am#of course for med school it's impossible not to talk about it as your classmates will bring it up in every third conversation#which opens the pandora's box of listening to other people talk about it which is atrocious as all people ever take away from it is#'oh my god everyone is doing so much more i'm so behind'#which isn't true everyone is in their own variation of hell just slightly different#i try to block it out completely when i can#med students have this annoying tendency to group themselves into these circles of self feeding despair and nervousness#i mean all of med insta is full of dogshit memes like this of the same 'le epic med stress' memes#kill yourselves you people are self fulfilling prophecies#josef lada ice these fools#to chce klid#as the man said#a taky trošku sebevědomí#and also not listening or giving a fuck what anyone else is doing#každý ma svůj systém a svůj styl#and have a life outside of this as well
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I LOVE MAKING MY MINI KIRBYS INTERACT WITH STUFF ON MY DESK!!! ⭐️👹👹👹⭐️
This is very self indulgent posting
#I’m slightly nervous posting this because idk if this is too much information to locate where I live but I’m happy with how this turned out#Mid-terms bitting me rn#I’m glad I made liking Kirby an obvious personality trait of mines because most of these things were gifted to me#Also please acknowledge the monkey Russian dolls#they’re great#on talking terms#kirby#I suck at taking pictures btw#Religious jumpscare btw acknowledge it if you want
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it is a truth universally acknowledged that if you raise your child catholic they will turn out fucked up and strange. there are many ways in which this end can be achieved but rest assured no matter what path your child follows in life they'll always be weird about god
#ur kid can be a tortured poet (like me) or an overly eager kid who announces that they have religious trauma to the class (a classmate)#heard that guy go 'haha yeah i went to catholic school so i have that trauma' in an awkward little way to the entire class#and i thought 'my guy. don't say it like that...' (cringed)#but you know what. then i remembered that i also turned out fucking weird. i just hide it slightly better in public situations#and i definitely also talked about having beef with god in my small group discussion that day dfjgshd#bracken getting a little wild in the eyes talking about how it was never adam and eve's fault because they only learned right + wrong#from the apple. and how could they have known what was right or wrong before that. to people he met a week ago#so you know what. solidarity with me and that guy. catholic-raised kids who turned out as fucking weirdos#valentine notes#catholic tag
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Genuinely, I've watched the 1st episode of the terror so many times I can quote along.
#reasons im insane. reasons my mum looks at me and thinks hm yeah probably autism#god. i rewatched the 1st ep with my parents and felt so unbearable that i was like. i cant continue watching this with him#i just wanna talk abt the script and the themes. me about the terror: have u ever considered the presence of god in the terror#bc i think abt it all the god danm time. and my dad is actually religious. like we had to prey before bed and before every meal#and im like slightly insane abt religion so im like how tf can i tempt u into a theological conversation#tell me how u feel abt ur religion. i desperately wanna kno. idk i just find it fascinating#i wish i could take a theological class on the bible. i would fucking love that. understand the context and history and themes and all that#god. this is what the terror does to me. bc i attach to weird things#terror ramblings#unrelated
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Penacony is just a bunch of religious trauma, isn't it
And i still wish to hug Misha from start to end. He is son shaped and I love him so much
#tarudce talks#honkai star rail#crying and scream GIVE ME MY BOY about Misha but in a slightly different way now#i need to get out of this art block and draw him#hes just a sweet little guy#all while I get haunted by religious trauma from several other characters cause it does not end in penacony
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Im gonna fucking kms
#My dad supports isr*el are you fucking kidding me#Idk if he does but#He was watching a video out loud of some guy speaking in russian and the dude praised isr*el for blocking hamas attacks#Like I'm aware hamas is a terrorist group but fucking hell please#The video the dude was also talking about the Ukrainian war but aaaa#Stupid extremely religious. Slavic. Anti a bunch of things slightly racist father
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can we talk about revival religions i want to talk about it... i like cant stress enough how concerning it is that people cant tell the difference between a closed practice that you need to belong to a certain community to understand vs. a revival invented by hobbyists for fun based on the texts of a dead (or...made up) tradition that everyone has equal access to & say things like “percy jackson is problematic because there are people who worship apollo” & get taken in by racists and nationalists bc they say shit like “we need to reclaim our marginalised indigenous heritage”. if u think thatbeing born in a nation state thats landmass roughly corresponds with the collection of ancient city-states that produced some of the most widely-disseminated literature in the world somehow puts you in the same position as an indigenous person begging white neopagans to stop burning white sage you really really need to unpack that...
#slightly related note i want to talk about how antitheist ex xtians are suddenly cool iwth neopagans so mb it wasnt 'religion' thats the#problem after all#and how many neopagans r just xtians w the serial numbers filed off#but think theyre an authority on Religious Oppression despite themselves constantly perpetuating xtian hegemony#including the xtian understanding that religion = believing n something#which explains the percy jackson thing because itslike. by believing in thsi thing i have a unique claim to it#and why it counts as a religion to have no community no cultural practices etc but you like light some candles in your room#ive said it so much at this point but i actually wouldnt have a problem w neopagans if we all understood that its a hobby and not a religion#lol#anyway its so blatantly just. modern nationalism because like#AN ITALIAN OP!!!!#like girl..do you need me to show you a map of the roman empire? is that what this is?????#and uh....where do u think u got those myths from#...#the type of shit that can be disproved just by knowing very basic historical facts. is what gets me#also christianity is a hellenic religion AMA
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daily kestrel 70:
worked, went to Sam's on my lunch break to buy some totes for packing, and did more work. and then after work.... we went to three houses, the first of which was a bust, followed by two absolute zingers that we could see ourselves in
long story short, we're putting three offers in in the morning and seeing what sticks. simultaneously terrified and excited, we rocked out to Freaks by Timmy Trumpet on the way home. we decided to get the big Zaxby's chicken tender pack for dinner, and after discussing in the car that we missed their milkshakes, we arrived to discover that they have brought back milkshakes - we took it as a good omen and got one for each of us, mostly as a surprise for Paige since Peyton and I were the ones who went in to pick up the food. after that big dinner, it's 9pm and it's bed time
I find it ironic that I went into my wedding dress shopping going "no strapless dresses" and went into this house shopping going "no split foyers", life really likes to twist me up in my words and prove me wrong. oh and Peyton can do an incredibly uncanny impression of the voice Bob does for the burgers when he talks to them
#monday#november#oh we also had a very well meaning but slightly odd older gentleman who worked at Zaxby's talk to us for a few minutes between milkshakes#the machine had an issue after the first one he made so he came out to apologize and ask for our patience and then started talking about...#like how we knew each other and that he wished us well and all that sort of stuff with some religious undertones#idk i was a little vape high during this so i was a bit out of it but Peyton said it wasn't too heavy handed with the religion stuff#he clearly meant well and was trying to do a “god bless you” sort of thing for us being patient and chill about the milkshake issue#he may have also been able to tell that we were a little stressed/high strung from the general vibes we exuded#to be fair we had just come off of the discussion of putting offers in and then blasting Timmy Trumpet
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When the one who appreciate you, in spite of being tsundere coded, that see value even past your clothes, goes as far as kissing to prove it, wants you, in turn, to see him as your only saving grace, your only god.
#ooc#slightly suggestive#putting this here bc yea#this ain't going on his blog#i do be talking about Wanderbedo#don't think i need to tag this as awfully religious talk tho#atleast this demigod ain't gonna ditch u 😔#he might have a teeny problem of wanting to be seen both as ur god and lover tho#oh to be Albedo and fricken kneel while being spoiled in bed#jktlfmgn#welp i veered off track#hi i took a nap and my thoughts on these two came crawling back#mobile#Muse: Michihiko#headcanon#kinda#but also like#wishlist
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I can’t believe how long it took for me to convince the High Priest to allow me to have social media
Seems using the “the gods request it” line still works like a charm. And that it would be good for me to be able to connect with others on a more personal level online since it would be safer than me sneaking out of the temple again to talk to people in person without a holy knight escorting me. They didn’t like learning I still do that, can’t stop me though. The gods always direct me away from any snitches sight when I sneak out.
Here’s to hoping they don’t find this blog because I didn’t tell them what site I chose!
#saints n sinners (amara) -ic-#ic blogging#religious //#((mostly tagging it bc?? Saint Amara is a saint and she’s slightly talking of her religion?))#((like its not based off of any real life religions))#((it’s a religion i created specifically for Amara’s story))#((but better safe than sorry??))
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Happy Wife, Happy Life 🤷🏽♀️ (🌽 Link)
Old Man!Price with a huge beer belly is always excited when you cook him a home cooked meal.
During his time in the SAS, John would absentmindedly fantasise about the bliss of domesticity. Of coming home to a well-loved house filled with knick-knacks with you giving John a soft smile while telling him that dinner will be on the table in a few.
Sometimes John tries to think about what religious good that he has ever done to have you in his life and he is fully convinced that domestic bliss does not exist without you in it. Pride and pity fills him up when he thinks about all the sad bastards out there who have never had the privilege of seeing you.
With all those years of training, he's developed some self restraint. He doesn't pounce straight away, wanting to take his sweet time with you.
John will sit in the living room watching you cook a hearty meal for the two of you, in your apron and not so cute pyjamas underneath which gives you such a wifely hue that he can never get over.
You plate dinner up and fix the dining table for dinner before you beckon him to sit down and eat. The mundanity of the conversation is what makes John's mind run a mile a minute. Having a beautiful wife, a delicious meal and talking about anything and everything that does relate to work. He can finally switch his mind off, he's away from the screams and shouts of the battlefield and is in the security of the four walls you share together,
Instead of the cries of the innocent and the ricochet of rockets banging in his eardrums, it's your sweet voice and loud laughs that echo in his ear like the melody of sirens. He's entranced and he only falls deeper. After dinner, John will help you clear the table, wash the dirty dishes and put away the leftovers for tomorrow's lunch.
You and John both walk to your bedroom and make your way to the en suite with John tailing behind you. Getting started with your nightly routine, he'll walk up behind you slowly yet purposefully, resting his hands on your hips before snaking his burly arms around your waist with your back flush against his chest, earning a chuckle from you.
A searing kiss on your shoulder, making his way to the curve of your neck, licking and nipping. Your face begins to flush and feel hot. A quiet, content sigh leaves your lips as John nuzzles into your neck with one hand squeezing your tits occasionally pinching your nipple.
“Come on, petal. The bed’s right there.” He’ll murmur against your skin like a lovesick puppy.
You try to protest only to have John already tugging you away from the bathroom sink to the bed. He’ll push you into the bed, settling in between your thighs. John will look up, hungry, desperate and absolutely pathetic. Peppering your inner thigh with chaste kisses, he makes his way to your clothed cunt.
“Been missing this good girl.” John buries his face into your cunt as it begins to soak your panties slightly. Groaning at the scent of you, he sucks on your panties. His saliva mixing with the arousal staining your panties. Eyes dilating as your soft mewls reverberate off the walls, John gets drunk of your noises.
“Forgot to take Viagra, hun. It’s just my mouth and hands for the night.” He looks at you apologetically.
You groan, hastily taking off your panties before shoving his face forcefully into your sopping pussy.
“More than enough, big bear.” A shudder gasp leaves your lips as John sucks on your clit, your thighs lock his head in place, pulling him even closer than before.
Blissful domesticity. John’s addiction.
#john price x reader#cod smut#john price#john price cod#john price smut#captain john#tf141 smut#captain price#john price x you#price x reader#price smut#price cod#price x you#captain price x reader#price x y/n#captain john price smut#john price x y/n#captain john price x you#captain john price x reader#captain john price#captain price x female reader#captain price x y/n#captain price x you#captain price smut#captain john price x female reader#captain john price fluff#john price fluff#price fluff#cod x reader#tf 141 x reader
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i’m aware that i haven’t been to a church in years but I think that soreness in my throat either means something’s going on or the cold just decided to have the funniest sense of comedic timing
#frost talks#tw religious mention#tw religion#I’ve never been the most religious person so my family joked about me looking slightly ill#which honestly I think is hilarious#so lighthearted of course
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DAMNED DEVOTION [3/3]
ship: father charlie x fem!nun!reader warnings: nsfw 🔞 ( m. receiving oral/handjob; fem. receiving oral; p in v; overstimulation; creampie, wrap before you tap kiddos; breeding kink; degradation/praise kink; coercion/dub-con?; sacrilege, heavy religious imagery ) word count: 5.4k a/n: ahhh, i can't believe i finally finished the final part to this little 'devotion' piece. to thank you all for following along with this series i may have gone a little filthy 😅 also, don't know if you guys care to know, but it's my twin (@k-nayee) and i's 20th birthday today, wheeewwww 🎉🥳! i'll see you all in the next update, and don't be afraid to shoot an ask/request or check out my other works! this is a continuation of my previous one-shotS, '𝐒𝐀𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐆𝐈𝐎𝐔𝐒 𝐃𝐄𝐕𝐎𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍' and '𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐒 𝐎𝐅 𝐃𝐄𝐕𝐎𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍.' If you haven't read those yet, I recommend starting there to understand the progression of their relationship….
★·.·´ɢʀᴏᴛᴇsǫᴜᴇʀɪᴇ 🇲🇦🇸🇹🇪🇷🇱🇮🇸🇹`·.·★
It was a bright afternoon, the sun hanging high in the sky, its rays filtering through the branches of the old oak tree that stood at the edge of the courtyard. The air smelled fresh, filled with the scent of blooming flowers and the distant murmur of conversation.
A group of young nuns-in-training, dressed in their modest habits, sat on the grass, their voices soft with laughter. You were among them, sitting with your legs tucked beneath you, your Bible open in your lap, a pencil in your hand as you made notes from the earlier service.
The warmth of the sun on your skin made you feel content, almost peaceful, and you were momentarily lost in thought, the words on the page blurring slightly as your mind wandered.
"Sister ____!" a voice called, breaking through your concentration.
You looked up, startled, to see one of the younger nuns smiling at you, her eyes bright with curiosity. She had a round face, still clinging to the softness of her youth, her cheeks flushed from the sun. Her name was Sister Olive, and she was always one of the more talkative ones, her energy infectious among the group.
"Yes?" you replied, giving her a gentle smile. The group of nuns-in-training giggled amongst themselves, their eyes flickering between you and something—or rather someone—further down the courtyard path.
You followed their gaze and saw Father Charlie walking alongside another priest, his expression focused, his hands clasped behind his back.
The sun seemed to catch on his features, highlighting the strong line of his jaw, the soft waves of his hair. He looked every bit the holy man, yet there was an undeniable handsomeness to him, something that drew eyes wherever he went.
Sister Olive leaned forward, her voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper, her eyes twinkling with mischief. "Sister ____, does Father Charlie have a wife?"
Your brows furrowed slightly, confused by the question. "Pardon?" you asked, blinking as you looked back at her.
The group broke into another fit of giggles, Sister Olive glancing towards Father Charlie again before continuing. "I heard that priests can be married if they were married before being ordained..." she trailed off, her tone curious, her gaze turning back to you. "I just wondered if Father Charlie was ever married. He seems like he could be, doesn't he?"
You felt heat rise to your cheeks at the implication, and you quickly shook your head, trying to keep your voice steady. "No, Sister Olive, he isn't married," you answered, your tone soft but firm.
The young nuns exchanged glances, and another wave of giggles spread through the group, their laughter light and full of the innocence of youth.
Sister Olive sighed dramatically, her eyes sparkling with amusement. "Ah, I thought so. He's too serious to have a wife, don't you think? But still... he's quite handsome."
You swallowed, glancing back towards Father Charlie, who was now nearing the edge of the courtyard, his eyes scanning the area as if searching for something—or someone.
You quickly looked away, your heart fluttering in your chest, a strange mixture of emotions churning within you. You knew you shouldn't think of him in that way, shouldn't let the words of the younger nuns affect you, but it was impossible not to.
The memory of his touch, his voice, the way he had looked at you in the confessional—it all came rushing back, making your pulse quicken, your hands trembling slightly as you closed your Bible.
A second later, a shadow fell over the group; the young nuns quickly quieted, their giggles turning into soft murmurs. Looking up, you saw Father Charlie standing before you, a small, knowing grin on his lips.
His eyes locked onto yours, an intensity in his gaze that made your breath catch. He gave a short, polite bow of his head. "Good morning, Sister ____," he said, his voice smooth, almost gentle, before his gaze shifted to the rest of the group. "Good morning, sisters."
The young nuns responded in unison, their voices a mix of giggles and greetings. You looked down at your Bible, mumbling a quiet, "Good morning, Father Charlie," along with the others, your face heating up under his watchful eyes.
You thought that was the end of it, that he would move on and let you be, but then he spoke again, his voice calling your name.
"Sister ____," he said, his tone still polite, but there was something in it that made your heart skip a beat. "I was hoping I could have your assistance with preparing for next week's sermon. I need some help organizing the notes and scriptures. Would you be able to spare a moment?"
You felt your heart race, already knowing that this was a lie, that his request had little to do with the sermon and everything to do with the tension that lingered between you.
Clearing your throat, you forced a smile, nodding as you closed your Bible and rose to your feet. "Of course, Father," you replied, turning to the young nuns. "I'll see you all later."
They nodded, their eyes wide with curiosity as they watched you walk away with Father Charlie. He led you across the courtyard, his pace measured, his hands clasped behind his back.
You followed him in silence, your heart pounding, your mind racing with a mix of anticipation and fear.
He brought you to the sacristy—a room in the church where sacred objects and vestments were kept and prepared for use during rituals.
The room was medium-sized, its thick concrete walls lined with shelves that held ornate chalices, gilded candlesticks, and other sacred items. A large wooden table stood in the center, covered with cloth and a few open books, the sunlight streaming through the small window, casting a warm glow over the space.
The air smelled faintly of incense, the scent comforting yet heavy, reminding you of the solemnity of the church.
You turned around just in time to see Father Charlie shut the door, the soft click of the lock echoing in the quiet room.
Your heart skipped a beat, your breath catching in your throat as he turned back to you, his eyes dark, filled with something you couldn't quite name—something that made your pulse quicken, your hands trembling slightly at your sides.
You swallowed, trying to steady yourself, and turned back around, your eyes roaming over the various sacred objects lining the shelves. You busied yourself by adjusting the cloth on the table, pretending to study the items, anything to keep yourself distracted from the tension filling the room.
You could feel him behind you, his presence heavy, the air thick with something unspoken.
A shudder ran through you as you felt his hands on your shoulders, his fingers rubbing gently against the fabric of your habit, caressing your shoulders with a slow, deliberate touch. You closed your eyes, trying to suppress the tremble that ran through your body, your breath catching in your throat.
"F-Father Charlie..." you began, your voice barely above a whisper, your heart pounding in your chest.
Before you could say anything more, he spun you around, his hands firm on your shoulders. His eyes were intense, dark, filled with a hunger that made your knees weak. His face was inches from yours, and you could see the way his pupils were blown wide; his lips parted slightly as he looked at you.
"Shhh," he murmured, one of his hands moving up to cup your face, his thumb brushing softly against your cheek. His touch was gentle, almost tender, but there was an intensity behind it that made your heart race. His gaze bore into yours, and for a moment, you felt like you were caught, trapped in the depth of his eyes, unable to look away.
You took a shaky step back, your eyes dropping to the floor as you tried to gather your thoughts. You turned away from him, your hands gripping the edge of the table, your knuckles white as you spoke, your voice trembling. "Father, I... I find myself at war. What we... what we have, it's wrong. It's against everything we believe in, everything we stand for. I can't... we can't keep doing this."
You heard him let out a soft, frustrated sigh, and a second later, his hands were on you again, spinning you around to face him. There was a tension in his jaw; his eyes narrowed slightly, frustration evident in the way he looked at you.
"No," he said, his voice firm, his gaze intense as he held you in place. "No, Sister. You're wrong. This... what we have, it's not wrong. It's not some sin that we need to be ashamed of." His voice softened slightly, his eyes searching yours. "Do you think the love between Jesus and Mary Magdalene was wrong? Do you think He loved her any less because of who she was? Love is not something to be condemned, not when it's real... not when it consumes you the way this consumes me."
His voice dropped lower, almost a groan, his eyes darkening as he stepped closer, his chest brushing against yours. "You have no idea what you do to me. The way you look at me, the way you move, the way you speak—it's made me delirious. I can't think of anything else but you; I can't focus on anything but this need, this hunger for you. You've taken hold of me, body and soul, and I can't... I can't let you go."
His words sent a shiver down your spine, your cheeks flushing at the intensity of his gaze, the raw need in his voice. You could feel your resolve crumbling, the conflict within you fading beneath the weight of his confession, the depth of his longing.
"Please," he whispered, his voice breaking slightly, a desperate edge to his words. "Please, just let me have you, one last time. If you're sure—if you really mean it, I'll let you go. But please... just one more time."
A soft, almost mousy, "Okay," left your lips before you could stop yourself, the word barely audible, but it was all he needed.
In an instant, he was on you, his lips crashing against yours, his hands pulling you close, his fingers digging into your waist as he kissed you with a hunger that took your breath away.
Your steps staggered back, your body unsteady as he moved with you, following you, his lips never leaving yours. Your back hit the edge of the table, and he pressed against you, his body warm, his touch insistent, his kiss deepening as his tongue slipped into your mouth, coaxing a soft moan from your throat.
His hands moved to your hips, lifting you slightly as he guided you onto the table, his lips trailing down your neck, his breath hot against your skin. You could feel the intensity of his need, the way his body pressed against yours, his hands exploring, claiming, as if he couldn't get enough of you.
His fingers were frantic as they pushed up your habit, his touch rough, almost desperate. His lips never left your skin, trailing hot, open-mouthed kisses down your collarbone, across your chest.
You could feel his breath coming in quick, shallow bursts, his need evident in every hurried movement, every touch. He kissed you deeply, his tongue sliding against yours, swallowing your soft moans as his hands moved beneath the fabric, lifting it higher, his touch hot against your bare skin.
You gasped when he dropped to his knees before you, his lips brushing against your inner thigh, his hands holding your legs apart. Just as he was about to continue, you panicked slightly, your hands flying to his shoulders, gripping them tightly. "W-Wait," you stuttered, your voice shaky, your heart pounding in your chest.
Charlie looked up at you, his gaze questioning, his breath hot against your thighs. His eyes were dark, filled with desire, and his lips were parted, his chest rising and falling with each breath.
You swallowed, licking your lips nervously as you avoided his gaze, your fingers still gripping his shoulders. "I... you always... I mean, you always... please me with your mouth," you stammered, your face growing hot, your voice barely above a whisper. "I-I was wondering if... if I could... return the favor?"
Your words were awkward, your innocence clear in the way you spoke, the way your eyes flickered everywhere but at him. You cleared your throat, trying to steady yourself, your voice going quiet. "I mean... if you want, Father..." You finally forced yourself to meet his gaze, your eyes wide, nervous, and hopeful.
For a moment, there was silence between the two of you, the air thick with tension. You began to worry that you had said something wrong, that you had crossed some line, but then Charlie let out a low groan, his hands tightening on your thighs, his head dropping against them. He muttered something, his voice muffled, and you barely caught the words, "Are you truly an angel, or a devil sent to test me?"
He stood slowly, his hands sliding up your thighs as he rose, his eyes never leaving yours. When he reached you, he cupped your face, pulling you into a deep, lingering kiss. His lips moved slowly against yours, his tongue teasing, tasting, and when he finally pulled away, he left a soft peck against your lips. His eyes were softer now, the intensity replaced with something gentler, his thumb brushing across your bottom lip, his touch tender.
Then, his expression shifted, his eyes darkening, a low, commanding tone entering his voice as he spoke. "Get on your knees," he said, his voice almost a growl.
You felt a shiver run through you, your body reacting instinctively to his words. You stared up at him, your heart pounding, your pulse quickening as you saw the way his eyes had darkened, the hunger there almost overwhelming. His breathing was shallow, his gaze so intense it made your knees weak.
Slowly, you moved, slipping off the table, your feet touching the ground as you lowered yourself to your knees before him. You didn't break eye contact as you descended, your gaze locked on his, the intensity of the moment making your heart pound.
There was something electric in the air, something that made your skin tingle, your breaths coming in short, shallow gasps.
Father Charlie's eyes were dark, his gaze fixed on you, his lips parted slightly, his chest rising and falling as he watched you. You could feel the heat radiating off him, the tension between you almost unbearable.
You knelt there, looking up at him, your hands resting on your thighs, waiting, anticipating.
Slowly, Charlie's hands moved beneath his robes, the rustling of fabric almost deafening in the silence of the room. You heard the soft clink of his belt buckle, the sound sending a shiver down your spine.
Your eyes widened slightly, your breath catching in your throat as you watched him, expecting him to pull his robes up and over his waist, but instead, he began slipping off the entire robe, his movements slow, deliberate.
Your gaze was drawn to his chest as the robe slid off his shoulders, revealing smooth, tanned skin, the muscles beneath rippling with each movement. He pulled the robe over his head, his arms flexing, the fabric falling to the floor behind him.
Your eyes trailed down his body, taking in every inch of him—the broadness of his shoulders, the way his chest rose and fell, the dark hair that started at his navel and led downward, disappearing beneath the waistband of his unbuckled trousers.
There was a dark line of hair, a happy trail that made your breathing stutter, your tongue darting out to wet your lips.
Charlie's eyes never left yours as he reached down, his fingers brushing against your cheek, his touch gentle, almost affectionate. His thumb caressed the bottom of your face before his hand shifted, his fingers gently squeezing your cheeks until your lips puckered slightly. His eyes darkened, his lips curling into a faint smile.
"Pull it out," he said, his voice low, almost a growl. He dropped his hand away, his gaze heavy as he watched you.
With shaking hands, you reached up, your fingers trembling as they found the button of his trousers. You fumbled for a moment, your breath shaky, your heart pounding in your chest.
You unbuttoned his trousers, your fingers brushing against the zipper, pulling it down slowly, the sound loud in the quiet room. You tugged the fabric down his hips, the trousers falling to his ankles.
Your eyes widened as you saw the large bulge straining against the fabric of his boxers, the outline of him clear, the sight making your breath hitch. Slowly, you reached forward, your fingers hooking into the waistband of his boxers, pulling them down, your gaze fixed on him.
His length sprang free, bobbing slightly before settling against his thigh. You couldn't help but stare, taking him in. The veins along his length stood out, thick and prominent, the head flushed a deep pink, glistening slightly.
You swallowed hard, your eyes tracing every inch of him, the reality of it sinking in. He was bigger than you remembered, the sheer size of him making your breath catch, your heart pounding even harder.
That... that was inside me...
Your cheeks flushed at the memory, the thought of it making your thighs press together, heat pooling in your belly.
"Sister," Charlie's voice broke through your thoughts, his tone soft but commanding. Your eyes snapped up, meeting his gaze, his dark eyes watching you intently. There was something in his expression, a mixture of desire and tenderness that made your breath catch. "Give me your hand," he said, his voice barely above a whisper.
You hesitated for only a moment before you extended your hand to him, your fingers trembling slightly. He took it gently, his thumb brushing over your knuckles, and you watched as his other hand moved down his chest, his fingers gliding over his smooth skin, tracing the lines of his muscles before finally wrapping around his length.
He let out a shaky breath, his chest rising and falling as he began to stroke himself, his thumb rubbing over the sensitive tip. His eyes never left yours, watching your reaction, his lips parted as he sucked in a breath, a shudder running through his body.
The sight made your mouth go dry, your eyes widening as you watched him, unable to look away. After a few seconds, he shuddered your name, his voice rough, needy. "Touch me," he panted, his eyes half-lidded, his gaze filled with desire.
You allowed him to guide your hand, wrapping your fingers around him, his own hand covering yours, his grip firm. A low, broken moan left his lips at the contact, his head tilting back slightly, his eyes closing for a moment.
You could feel the warmth of him, the way he twitched in your hand, the weight of him almost overwhelming.
Sitting up on your knees, you moved closer, your other hand resting on his strong thigh to steady yourself. Your thumb unconsciously brushed against his leg, the muscles tensing beneath your touch as you focused on holding him in your hand.
You looked up at him, your eyes questioning, unsure of what to do next. Charlie's gaze dropped to meet yours, his thumb reaching out to pull down your bottom lip, his eyes darkening as he dipped it into your mouth for a brief moment. He let out a soft sigh, his voice almost a whisper. "Open wider," he instructed, his eyes fixed on you. "Drop your tongue, just like you're about to eat a popsicle."
You followed his instructions, your jaw dropping open, your tongue hanging out slightly, your eyes still locked on his. He hummed in approval, guiding your hand up, moving his length towards your awaiting tongue.
The tip of him brushed against your tongue, the taste salty, musky, as he rubbed the head across the surface, letting out an appreciative hum. He did this for a few seconds, his eyes watching every reaction you made, his lips curling into a small smile.
Slowly, he pushed himself further into your mouth, just an inch or two, his breath hitching as he watched you. "Close your lips around it," he murmured, his voice strained. "Suck."
You closed your mouth around him, your lips sealing around the head of his length, your tongue pressing against the underside. He let out a deep groan, his hand moving to the back of your head, his fingers tangling in your hair as he held you in place. "Just like that," he whispered, his voice thick hoarse. "That's it... good girl."
You began to suck gently, your cheeks hollowing as you moved your head slightly, taking him in just a bit more. The taste of him filled your mouth, salty and slightly bitter, but not unpleasant.
His hips jerked slightly, a low moan escaping his lips as he watched you, his eyes dark, filled with lust. He guided you slowly, his hand on the back of your head setting the pace, his breathing growing more ragged with each passing moment.
"Use your tongue," he panted, his voice barely above a whisper. "Swirl it around the tip... yes, just like that." You did as he instructed, your tongue moving over the sensitive head, and he shuddered, his grip on your hair tightening, a deep groan rumbling from his chest. "God, you have no idea what you do to me," he muttered, his voice strained, his eyes locked on yours.
You continued to move, your hand stroking the base of him as you sucked, your other hand still resting on his thigh, your thumb brushing against his skin in a soothing motion.
His breaths came in short gasps, his chest heaving as he watched you, his eyes half-lidded, his lips parted. He whispered your name, his voice filled with need, his hips rocking slightly, pushing himself deeper into your mouth.
"You're perfect," he groaned, his head tilting back, his eyes closing as he lost himself in the sensation. "So good... just like that. Don't stop." His words were slurred, his voice thick with pleasure, and you could feel him throbbing in your mouth, the taste of him growing stronger as he neared his peak.
His hips began to move more, his breathing turning into short, desperate gasps, his hand guiding you, holding you in place as he chased his release. He muttered your name, his voice breaking, a mixture of moans and whispered praises filling the room as he lost himself to the pleasure.
When he finally came, the taste of him filled your mouth, his hips jerking, a deep groan escaping his lips as he held you there, his fingers tangled in your hair. He panted heavily, his chest rising and falling rapidly as he looked down at you, his eyes dark, filled with something raw, something possessive.
Charlie reached down, his hand wrapping around your arm, pulling you up from your knees with a strength that left you breathless. He yanked you into a kiss, his lips crashing against yours, his tongue licking into your mouth, tasting himself on your tongue.
He groaned against your lips, his hand moving to the back of your neck, holding you in place as he devoured you, his kiss deep, consuming. His tongue moved against yours, his teeth grazing your bottom lip as he pulled back slightly, licking across your lips before placing a softer, lingering kiss there.
He pulled away, his eyes locking onto yours, a small, satisfied smile on his lips. Without a word, he lifted you, settling you back onto the table, his hands pushing up your habit, his gaze dropping between your legs as he knelt before you once again. "I need to prep you," he murmured, his voice husky, his hands sliding up your thighs.
His fingers reached between your legs, expecting to find the fabric of your underwear, but instead, they came in contact with your soaked folds. He let out a surprised sound, his eyes shooting up to meet yours, a brow raised in question. You released a huff, your cheeks flushing as you looked away, muttering, "It's laundry day..."
Charlie let out a soft chuckle, shaking his head slightly, his lips curling into an amused smile. He leaned in, pressing a kiss to your knee before his hands moved to push your thighs further apart, the stretch making your muscles burn slightly, the sensation both uncomfortable and thrilling. He held your legs open, his eyes fixed on you, watching your every reaction.
Before you knew it, his mouth was on you, his lips pressing against your sensitive flesh, a silent gasp falling from your lips, your eyes closing, your head falling back as your back arched off the table.
The feeling of his tongue moving against you, licking, sucking, made your thighs tremble in his hold, your fingers gripping the edge of the table, your knuckles turning white.
He worshipped you with his mouth, his tongue moving with purpose, teasing your entrance, his lips closing around your clit, sucking gently.
One of his hands moved up, his fingers brushing against your entrance before slowly pushing inside, stretching you, his mouth never stopping, never hesitating. He worked you with a skill that left you breathless, every flick of his tongue, every gentle thrust of his fingers pushing you closer and closer to the edge.
Your orgasm built slowly, a steady climb that made your whole body tense, every nerve ending alive with sensation. Charlie seemed to know exactly where to touch, where to kiss, how to move his fingers to bring you to the brink, his name falling from your lips in a breathless whisper, your body trembling, your thighs shaking around his head.
But just as you were about to fall over the edge, just as the pleasure was about to consume you, he pulled away.
A frustrated whine escaped your lips, your eyes opening, a mixture of confusion and need in your gaze as you looked down at him. He stood slowly, his eyes dark, a small smirk playing on his lips as he watched you, your chest rising and falling rapidly, your body aching for release.
Charlie licked his lips, his eyes never leaving yours as he reached up, his fingers tilting your head back, exposing the line of your neck to him. He leaned in, pressing a soft kiss just below your jaw, his breath warm against your skin. His other hand moved to wrap one of your legs around his waist, his fingers digging into your thigh as he held you against him, his body pressed tightly to yours.
He let out a low chuckle, the sound vibrating against your skin. "Don't worry, Sister," he murmured, his voice thick with desire, his lips brushing against your ear. "I'll fill you back up and give you what you need." The words sent a shiver down your spine, your core clenching at the promise, a whimper escaping your lips.
Charlie reached between your bodies, his hand wrapping around his length, positioning himself. He rubbed the tip against your clit, the sensation making your body jerk, a gasp falling from your lips.
He moved slowly, dragging the head of his length up and down your slit, teasing you, your body trembling in his arms, the anticipation almost too much to bear.
Then, without warning, he pushed forward, bullying his way into you, the stretch almost unbearable.
You arched further into his arms, your mouth falling open in a silent scream, your body struggling to accommodate him. He let out a deep groan, his fingers tightening on your thigh, his other hand moving to grip your hip, holding you in place as he filled you completely.
His pace was brutal, each stroke long and deep, pulling almost all the way out before thrusting back in, his hips slamming against yours. His breath was hot against your neck, his lips brushing against your skin as he spoke, his voice low, rough, filled with need. "You... You feel so good... so tight around me," he panted, his words broken by soft moans. "I'm going to fuck you, fill you up until you can't think of anything else."
His hips snapped against yours, his movements rough, desperate, his body pressing you down against the table, his weight holding you in place. He leaned in closer, his lips brushing against your ear. "Imagine it, Sister," he whispered, his voice dark, almost a growl. "A secret child... a product of our sin, of our blasphemy against the church." His words sent a jolt of pleasure through you, your core clenching around him, your body reacting to the forbidden promise, the thought of it pushing you closer to the edge.
Your orgasm hit you like a tidal wave, your entire body tensing, your back arching as the pleasure consumed you, a silent scream on your lips. You could feel Charlie shudder above you, his thrusts growing erratic, his breath coming in short gasps as he chased his own release.
After a few more brutal strokes, he let out a deep groan, his hips pressing against yours as he came, his body tensing, his fingers digging into your skin.
He stayed there, his forehead resting against your shoulder, his breath hot against your neck as he tried to catch his breath, his chest rising and falling heavily. You could feel his heart pounding against your own, the room filled with the sound of your ragged breathing, the air thick with the scent of sweat and sex.
You shivered as he began to pull back, the movement making you wince slightly, your body still sensitive from the intense pleasure.
His softening length slipped out of you, the feeling making you gasp softly, a mix of relief and emptiness settling in your chest. You felt the warm, sticky sensation as globs of his cum poured out, slowly dripping down your inner thighs.
You began to close your legs, thinking he was done, that he would put his clothes back on, but his hand stopped you, his fingers pressing against the inside of your thigh, keeping you open.
Charlie lowered himself to his knees once again, his eyes fixed on you, a dark hunger still present in his gaze. Before you could understand what was happening, his mouth was on you, his lips pressing against your sensitive folds.
A sharp gasp escaped your lips as you felt his tongue, warm and wet, sliding through your slickness, lapping up the mixture of your release and his own. His groans were sinful, vibrating against you, his eyes fluttering closed as if savoring the taste.
Your brain raced, unsure of what to do or what to say, your body twitching beneath his touch, your legs instinctively trying to close, still overly sensitive from your previous climax. But Charlie's hands were strong, his grip firm as he held your thighs apart, his fingers digging into your skin, keeping you open for him.
He was relentless, his tongue moving with purpose, his lips closing around your swollen clit, sucking gently, sending sparks of pleasure shooting through your body.
Your breaths came in short, desperate gasps, your fingers gripping the edge of the table, your knuckles white. You could feel the pleasure building again, a slow, steady climb that made your whole body tense, every nerve ending alive with sensation.
You couldn't hold back the soft whimpers and moans that spilled from your lips, your head falling back, your eyes closing as the pleasure consumed you.
When you came, it hit you like a final, blinding wave, your body arching off the table, your thighs trembling in Charlie's hold. A broken cry escaped your lips, your back arching, your eyes squeezed shut.
Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. Your mind was clouded as the pleasure consumed you, the feeling like the flames of damnation licking at your skin. For I am burned by the fire of desire, a sinner in the eyes of heaven.
And you weren't sure if you minded at all.
A/N: ya know, i think my smut has gotten better, what do you guys think??? and to answer the upcoming question(s) i know will be asked: yes, this is the final part, i won't be continuing the 'Devotion' series/making it into a book 😔 i know, i know. i promise i want too, but knowing me, i tend to bounce around/start new projects out of nowhere, so if i didn't spend weeks planning before hand, it'll grow cold eventually, and i don't wanna put you guys through that 😩 but never fret, i will continue writing for father charlie 😝, he's just too versatile not to. see you guys soon ❤️❤️❤️.
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