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#sir urcheon
amanitaknowsbest · 11 months
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Idk WHY this memory just unlocked, but when I was a kid I had a genuine fear of HIM from The Powerpuff Girls
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This guy.
I thought he was gonna kill me.
I also
Thought that Sonic the Hedgehog was going to kill me and usurp my place in my family
And I have had a visceral dislike for hedgehogs ever since
Especially when they turn up in media LIKE THIS
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LOOK AT THESE SPECIMENS
This is my penance for something or another, that I'll jumpscare myself later on
And you might think "Amanita you're a monster fucker, how could you say that"
I can hate fuck something just fine!!
What was I talking about
Oh YEAH, my childhood
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ninewheels · 4 years
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THE WITCHER Characters By Screen Time
(Current through season 2)
Geralt of Rivia - 266 Yennefer of Vengerberg - 192:45 Princess Cirilla - 168:15 Jaskier - 62:45 Tissaia de Vries - 50 Fringilla Vigo - 45 Triss Merigold - 43:30 Cahir Mawr Dyffryn aep Ceallach - 40:30 Istredd - 36:30
Queen Calanthe - 30:45 Vesemir - 30:15 The Roaches* - 21:15 Mousesack - 20 Francesca - 18:45 Stregobor - 18:30 Vilgefortz of Roggeveen - 17:30 Dara - 17:15 Filavandrel - 15:15 The Doppler - 14 Nivellen - 13:30 Voleth Meir - 13:15 Princess Pavetta - 12:45 Urcheon / Duny / Emhyr the White Flame - 12:30 Renfri - 11:15 Sabrina Glevissig - 10:30 Artorius Vigo - 10:15 King Eist Tuirseach - 10:15 Lambert - 9:45 Coen - 9:15 Borch Three Jackdaws / Villentretenmerth - 9:15 Rience - 8:15 Eithne - 8 Eskel - 8 Nenneke - 7:30 Lord Ostrit - 7:15 Yarpen Zigrin - 7 King Foltest - 6:45 Sigismund Dijkstra - 6 Vereena - 6 Téa - 5:15 Véa - 5:15 King Vizimir of Redania - 4:45 Queen Kalis - 4:45 Ba’lian - 4:45 Lydia van Bredevoort - 4:30 Chireaden - 4:30 Murta - 4:15 Sir Lazlo - 4:15 Gage - 4 General Hake - 3:45 Danica - 3:45 Zola - 3:30 Yurga - 3:30 Marilka - 3:30 Codringher - 3:30 Everard - 3:15 Dermain - 3:15 Vanielle of Brugge - 3:15 Sir Danek - 3 Hemrik - 3 Tolbert - 3 Zola - 2:45 Fenn - 2:45 Visenna - 2:30 Lara Dorren - 1
* Since Season 1 takes place over decades and Geralt names all his horses Roach anyway, I’m just grouping them together.
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sarcastic-space-gal · 4 years
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The Dancer with Golden Earrings
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Summary: At Pavetta’s betrothal feast, Jaskier meets a famous dancer. Little they know, destiny has plans not only for the princess and her knight.
Pairing: Jaskier x Reader;
Word Count: 2k;
Warning: None;
A/N: Here is my first Witcher fic ‘cause I’m obsessed and with Jaskier ‘cause he his my favorite. I’ll probably write a part 2 so stay tuned! I hope you’ll like it and feedback is always appreciated! Love you all xoxo.
Adjusting the fabric of your dress for the umpteenth time you looked again at your reflection in the mirror. The room you stayed in wasn’t quite warm, yet you could feel your palms sweat with nervousness. It was unusual for you to feel tense before a performance, especially because you felt confident most of the time, but that night was different. Completely different.
Being a dancer could be stressful sometimes, mostly because of the expectations put on you: everything had to be perfect, your look, your performance, the audience had to be pleased. Your life was a constant wandering around the cities to find a place where you could perform and where they could also pay you.
Fortunately, you built your reputation quite easily and quickly became one of the most skilled and appreciated dancer around the Continent.
Surely you had worked with important and illustrious people in different cities but you never ended up in a castle. That was until one morning. You could never forget the moment when you received an invitation letter, held in a neat, creamy envelope, sent directly from Cintra. Your name was spelled with a beautiful, sophisticated handwriting, you had never received something like that before. With excitement sparkling in your eyes, you carefully but urgently opened the package and read the content.
Apparently Queen Calanthe’s daughter, Pavetta, was already old enough to tie the knot with some young, and probably inexperienced, prince who would assure a powerful and convenient alliance between the two kingdoms. Nevertheless, that was none of your business. What was really important, and what almost made you gasp in astonishment, was that you were personally requested to perform to Princess Pavetta’s betrothal feast. You felt beyond grateful and honored to say the least.
Few days later, there you were, in Cintra’s palace, ready to perform in front of many noble men and women, and of course, in front of the royal family: that’s something that happens once in a lifetime, hence you forgave yourself for being a little nervous after all.
Taking a look at the mirror again you frowned. Something is missing, you thought, when suddenly you remembered: your earrings. Your old, thick, golden hoops. They were out-dated, a little ruined and probably old-fashioned, but you couldn’t care less: they were gifted to you many years ago, it was a dear memory of your past and you’d never let go of them. They became a sort of lucky charm. Glaring at your nightstand you quickly grabbed them and put them on.
“Let’s do this” you said before exhaling sharply.
“Geraaaalt”
The witcher had lost count of how many times he had rolled his eyes that day, or how many times that bard had called him out.
“What is it now?” he grumbled.
“I think another jealous boyfriend, husband, or whatever, is coming for me” said the bard with a hectic tone, trying to hide behind the witcher.
Unable to suppress a smirk, Geralt turned his head behind his shoulders were Jaskier now stood. “I thought the ‘eunuch’ story was quite fun”
“Maybe for you Geralt!”
The man who quickly marched towards the bard with an inscrutable glare on his face finally reached his destination but it was firstly faced with the witcher, who folded his arms over his chest.
“Excuse me I need to talk to the man behind you” he said, with a surprisingly calm tone. His features seemed pretty relaxed for someone who was going to rant about his unfaithful wife and his lover.
“You are probably mistaken sir, as you probably should already know I had an accident many years ago, I don’t know anything about your wife-”
The witcher chuckled at the man’s puzzled expression.
“Master Jaskier, I was only trying to inform you that if you were ready you could start perform”
Jaskier’s lips curled into an “o”, in both embarrassment and relief “Oh- I- Yes, yes of course” he stuttered while grabbing his lute really quickly, earning another chuckle from Geralt.
Undoubtedly, Jaskier was a highly acclaimed musician: his ballads were famous all around the different kingdoms, in fact, it was hardly surprising that as soon as he reached the center of the room, all the noble drunk guests started cheering, ready to sing their hearts out.
The bard started playing the lute with ease, his fingers gracefully but steadily moved up and down the strings creating a beautiful melody. Then his voice, which was soon accompanied by the guests’ voice and by their feet stomping under the tables, following the rhythm.
When Jaskier performance eventually came to an end, he humbly bowed several times toward the audience, who started applauding cheerfully.
Heading toward Geralt, Jaskier sighed with a proud smile on his face.
“I think they liked it” the witcher said with his baritone voice. He would never admitted but Jaskier noticed an expression of contentment on the witcher’s face.
“Of course they did!” he exclaimed with a bright smile “And you did too, I can see it”
“Shut up, Jaskier”
“Come on, be honest”
“Don’t even start this”
“I can see it in your face Gera-” Jaskier voice stopped when he heard a voice announcing the next performance.
A dancer. And not just any dancer.
“Y/n?” Geralt suddenly asked “Do you know her?”
“I’ve heard her name before, but I never meet her in person.” he responded, his curiosity growing as time went by.
“Oh bard prepare yourself” an old man beside them suddenly spoke, earning both the bard and the witcher’s attention “She is also known as ‘The dancer with golden earrings’. I’ve seen her before, performing and she’s one of a kind.”
Jaskier and Geralt attentively listened to him until their attention was caught by a figure entering the room, followed by a big round of applause.
The dancer firstly bowed respectfully to Queen Calanthe and the other royal family members, before giving a small nod toward the musicians, letting them know she were ready to start.
The feast was pretty noisy for most of the time during the night, voices, drunk shouts and singing would fill the room, whether it was for gossiping or to take advantage of the noise and talk about political stuff. However when the dancer appeared, all voices suddenly quieted and the music slowly started playing.
Initially Jaskier could only see her back, her hair, the voluminous floor-length dress, fabulously tight around her waist, her exposed arms, but couldn’t see her face. Everyone in the room had eyes only for her and when she finally turned around during her performance, Jaskier knew why.
Geralt looked out of the corner of his eye and saw the bard completely captivated by her and he couldn’t hold back a silent chuckle. Jaskier, however, didn’t even notice the witcher’s reaction: he had eyes only for her. Every movement she made was controlled but at the same time soft and elegant, showing impeccable discipline and mastery. The bard watched, almost hypnotized, as she approached the tables and moved around the room following the music’s rhythm. On her face was drawn the brightest smile he had ever seen, the candles’ light reflected on her golden earrings making her shine even more. If it’s even possible, Jaskier thought.
He was far too captivated by the swirl of colors made by her dress while she danced to notice how close she was. The driving rhythm of the drums and instruments made everyone start clapping cheerfully while she moved around. Jaskier’s heart almost came to a stop when she passed in front of him. Your eyes locked on each other’s for an instant.
Reaching the center of the room again, you took the hem of the dress in one hand, exposing a little of your right leg under hundred pleased glances. The music eventually came to an end and as soon as you finished, all the guests in the room and even Queen Calanthe started applauding.
Your heart was pounding in your chest for the excitement: the audience was thrilled by your dance and you couldn’t be happier.
“What did I tell you boys?” the old man beside the bard and the witcher commented snickering.
Jaskier simply nodded slowly, his features relaxed in awe.
Geralt turned his head to him, expecting a comment or a rant from the bard, who instead kept looking at the dancer.
“You are uncharacteristically silent Jaskier, I’m starting to worry” Geralt commented.
“Shut up Geralt” grumbled the bard.
After her performance, the voices of the guests started resonating again around the room along with glass clinking and plates being emptied.
Jaskier and Geralt were bickering again when out of the corner of their eyes they saw you approaching and instantly turned toward you.
“Master Jaskier?” you asked with a bright smile.
“Y-yes, Y/n? Right?” Jaskier stuttered.
You nodded “And your companion?”
“Geralt of Rivia” he introduced himself.
“It’s a pleasure” you smiled and turned your attention to the bard again “I’ve heard many of your ballads before but never had the chance to meet you in person. Your works are incredible”
“You are flattering me, Y/n. Actually I-” he didn’t had the time to finish because you were reluctantly taken away by some noble men who wanted to have a chat with you.
Jaskier watched as you were taken away, sighing sadly “Oh come on!”
“Here have a drink” Geralt handed him a cup full of wine, which the bard gladly took.
If you thought being at Queen Calanthe’s castle to perform was the only unusual thing that night, you were surely mistaken. Firstly, from nowhere appeared Urcheon of Erlenwald, who demanded Pavetta’s hand through the Law of Surprise. Calanthe obviously refused and in an escalation of violence Geralt, the witcher, saved him but what happened next left anyone speechless. Pavetta activated some kind of power, unleashing a maelstrom upon the castle, and now there you were trying to not get hit by some flying pitcher, or worse. The wind storm was strong enough to not let you stand up so you had to cover yourself on a wing and a prayer.
The wind was getting stronger and stronger as you felt debris hitting your skin, when suddenly you felt two hands on your shoulders.
“Follow me” the voice said. You lifted your head up to meet two deep blue eyes looking down at you.
Dodging debris coming from everywhere you noticed the princess and the knight floating mid-air completely clueless about what was happening down.
The man took your hand and placed you behind a large table which was knocked over on the floor. Without the wind in your eyes you could finally see him.
The bard, Jaskier.
The castle began to tremble under your feet, you didn’t know how much it would resist anymore, when suddenly the wind dissipated and the couple who was floating met the ground.
“Geralt!” Jaskier murmured. Geralt and Mousesack stopped her. The bard then turned to you and grabbed one of your shoulders and scanned your face.
“Are you ok?” he asked glaring down at you.
“Yes, I think. Thanks for helping me Jaskier” you said trying to find scratches or little wounds.
“I hope to have earned a minute of your time to introduce myself properly” he smiled.
You laughed “Of course”
Everyone was safe. Princess Pavetta was betrothed to Urcheon of Erlenwald as she wished and Calanthe accepted what destiny had chosen. You spent the rest of the night talking with Jaskier on a balcony, away from the feast. Both of you immediately find yourselves having so much in common, first thing first, music. He talked about his ballads and you described what was the perfect dance to go with them, according to you. You wished dawn would never come, you wished you could stay there again and again, just talking about your passions, and even if you didn’t know, Jaskier wished for the same things.
However the next morning you would have left. Another city, another audience to find. But destiny had another plan for you. Destiny in that case, wore a pastel blue doublet and played the lute.
“So what is your next stop Y/n?”
“I don’t know. I’ll probably head east.” you said looking right in front of you in the pitch black forest that surrounded the palace, a hint of sadness in your voice.
Jaskier stared at you, unsure to ask the next question.
“Come with us” Come with me, he thought.
You turned your head toward him, surprised by his question.
“You know, it’s said there are monsters that inhabit these parts of the kingdom, so you won’t travel alone”
You kept looking at him with surprise written all over your face. Jaskier thought he had gone to far by now.
“I mean, if it’s what you wan-” he stuttered.
“Jaskier, it would be a pleasure for me” you smiled.
Sighing in relief he reciprocated the smile as his heart started pounding in his chest, and even if he didn’t know, yours did the same.
Part 2
TAG LIST: @alyxkbrl​
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lwiamatka-a · 4 years
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@utternocries​
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                 " please, forgive the mess this feast has become, my honourable guests. " she spoke, her voice demanding attention, and so nobody dared to look anywhere but at her. she was the queen, it was clear as the day. " i know you've all arrived for one reason, and one reason only - to marry my daughter. but i have made my decision, and pavetta will not marry, until she herself decides she's ready. " 
               there were a few audible gasps, and a sniff from the princess, as a response to that statement. the silence didn't last long, however. " cintra needs a king, " she said those words in a way that made it obvious she mocked them, " and so it shall have one. for there is a man who had proven his love and devotion to me today. " eist smiled, taking her hand... 
               but she tore it out of his grip. if eyes could kill, eist would be laying dead on the floor. calanthe knew cintra needed the alliance with skellige. but she wasn't going to marry a man she felt nothing for, a man who, in the time of need, had proven himself useless. sided with the urcheon, made her pick between him and her daughter, while he chose honor over her. she couldn't. “ calanthe, do not jest. “ the man said, but her emerald green eyes stared at him in a way that made him go silent. 
               " i've refused your proposal three times already, you fool. how many more times do you need me to show you i have no intention of marrying you. " she spat out, looking to geralt - to the witcher - instead. " what do you say, sir ravix of fourhorn? will you accept my hand in marriage, as a reward, for proving yourself an honourable man, and saving my daughter from... gods know how awful fate? “ she took a risk saying that, in front of all these people. were she to be rejected so publicly, the dishonour to her name would run over the continent immediately.
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