#since this is to those who are wondering where tf i've been

[misshowdoyoudo]

Wtf has been going on?

Lol, glad you asked

So, back in like August, I got all my stuff packed up and I move back in with my parents because I am Finally Done with College, right? Except I'm not, because apparently one of my professors did not agree with my Internship because it wasn't to her standards.

So now I gotta redo my entire internship. Okay, that's fine, I got some connections, I'm only a little upset. Except I'm slowly losing my mind because that was a lot of work down the drain and she didn't tell me until the very END of the semester. Cool.

Well, then I find out I still needed ONE(1) singular credit in order to graduate. And it's not the internship credit, it's a movement credit.

At this point in time, I had also been dating trash dudes left and right. All these guys either wanted sex or someone to take home for the holidays so they didn't look worse than their brothers or whatever. My self esteem is dropping lower than it has in the past.

I set up a plan to end things. My dog has no idea how she saved my life.

ANYWAYS

About a month later, I meet a really good man. We hang out a bunch and things actually start looking up. We start dating for real mid-October. I really fall for him, and he falls just as hard (as I have been informed by him, at any rate lol)

Bf's mom (I will refer to her as Mamasita) has had chronic pain for a while now. Bf's dad (who I will refer to as Papa-san) has been looking around for things to help. Stumble upon this guy who can do surgeries to help.

So Mamasita goes in for TWO surgeries late November, early December. The first is a success and I help with chores while Mamasita is in bed and Papa-san is at work.

Second surgery rolls around and everyone is much more nervous about this one. This one is a lot riskier and could lead Mamasita to be paralyzed if done wrong (so could the last one, but the room for error is MUCH smaller on this one). Bf is sick with worry, so I'm keeping things upbeat and providing food and comfort while everyone is freaking out. I'm keeping Mamasita calm day of, and by extension bf and Papa-san.

The second surgery was a success, but Mamasita is in a LOT of pain the next day. I'm once more helping around the house (as is bf, but mostly in helping his mom), which isn't a big deal to me because I actually like cooking and cleaning, I just have a hard time staying focused on the tasks or even getting them started. Which is, huh, similar to how I go about writing.

TURNS OUT I HAVE ADHD

Surprised? I sure heckin was. Bamboozled, in fact. Got diagnosed shortly after a visit to a professional who was like: bro, you should get this checked out it might be adhd

And I was just 👀

I do exactly that. Now I'm going on Adderall, which will most likely help with my spasticness. Maybe. Hopefully.

TLDR: Had some bad thoughts for a bit, got some doctor help, got a wonderful boyfriend, helped with bf's mom having two surgeries, and found out I have ADHD for realsies. Wild.

[girlgrouptrash101]

Karina (Aespa) as Your Girlfriend

Requests:

"aespa’s karina as your gf please?"

"Can you do Karina from aespa as a girlfriend please?"

"I would like to request Aespa Karina as your girlfriend 😍"

"hi!! i hope your having a great day and i hope your doing well, can i request aespa’s karina as your gf? thank you~"

"Hello! Can I please request Aespa’s Karina as your girlfriend? Thank you!"

A/N: cannot believe it has been over 2 years since I've written anything lol. so here's a lil something to try get the creative juices flowing again wOO 🤭

- C

when 99% of the relationship is you just staring at karina and wondering how someone can be that beautiful. as you SHOULD

idk why but i feel like karina is the perfect person for the trope where she would make a habit of going to the same coffee shop every day even though she hates coffee,, just because you were the cute barista that worked there

despite her cool and composed aura, she unfortunately had no idea how to talk to you outside of ordering a drink; her brain would just fizzle out whenever she tried to strike up further conversation 🥲

so you had to be the one to take the first step, which took a hot minute because perhaps. miss yoo jimin had a sliiiiiightly threatening aura at first (you quickly learned she was really just a cutie patootie behind that stoic face she tended to wear. teehee)

after gaining enough courage, you ended up asking her out for coffee because you thought hm,, she comes here every day for coffee she must love it!

safe to say it was a little surprising when she responded with a very embarrassed "...i don't even like coffee"

with the tips of her ears flushing red as she had to explain her reasoning behind coming in every day

you decided instead to take her to the carnival that came to town every summer

[insert cliche top of the ferris wheel kiss here]

and every summer since then you've always gone to the carnival together, the two of you running around to go on all the rides like little kids, never getting tired of it even though you do the same thing every time it comes

she's the kind of girl to be super head over heels for you but never admit it until those times where you lay side by side in bed at night, your eyes doing your best to see each other's silhouettes in the dark

her hand coming up to rest on your cheek, thumb gently caressing your face as she reminds you of how much you mean to her

but don't bring it up the morning after unless you wanna get hit with the "idek what you're talking about i would never be so sappy 🤨"

fit checks!!!

refuses to leave the house in said fit unless you send a paragraph in all caps hyping her tf up (it's just what she deserves!)

queen of soft launching your relationship on social media 🥹

like IG stories of flowers you gave her, or your hands intertwined, but nothing too much more than that

because it's her relationship and she doesn't need the world to know about every little thing you two get up to,, that's for her to know and her only

well......... her and the aespa girlies who can't help but smile every time their leader comes home and launches herself face first into her pillow, gushing over how much she likes you and how nice your date was

(which she will NEVER admit happens. she's no softie, okay? okay. yes she is hehehehe)

ningning stealing karina's phone at the dorm and blowing your phone up with memes n sending off guard pics of Karina lol <3

Loves going for walks in the park nearby, no matter the weather or time, especially if there's something on her mind and she just wants to get some fresh air and chat it out with you

lives in your hoodies whether you like it or not, you have no choice cuz girlie just treats your wardrobe as hers

never brings PJs when she's staying at yours as an excuse for you to lend her even more clothes

brings a film camera everywhere,, her favourite thing is when the film fills up and she gets the pictures developed so she can bring them back to you and you can look back over the memories shared together

scrapbooking together !!! will even spend hours in the stationary shop looking for the perfect pen/washi tape to use for it hehe.

Can't stand it but also loves it when you compliment her as often as you do

(but it hurts ur heart a little when you feel she doesn't believe what you say is true, you wish she could feel the same love she has for you for herself too :[ )

so you pledge to always be there to lift her up and be her #1 fan!! in both day to day life and as a My of course

which meanssss first row seats to all the aespa concerts, practice nights, just generally supporting her through thick and thin, and she will no doubt do the same for you!

and that one day you came to an aespa fansign to surprise her 🥹 she had to hold back all the affection she wanted to give you :((((

gaming nights 🤓 and by gaming i mean gardenscapes....... god she's such a lil nerd

anime nights 🤓 her getting all excited when her faves come on screen, smacking you on the leg repeatedly with joy while she explains what's going on (because as much as you enjoy sitting down to watch her favourite shows w her, you really didn't understand half of it LOL)

loooooves late night arcade dates

especially so she can win plushies in the claw machines,,, or rather, you can win them for her (so chivalrous 😁)

her love for claw machine plushies gets so bad that your bed now has a mountain of them stacked up that you have to throw off before bed everyyyyy night omg

not to change the subject but like. Karina's morning cuddles 🥹

or for the mornings where you wake up late, your eyes opening to the sound of her padding back into the bedroom to check on you, a smile creeping onto your face as you feel the bed sink where she sits by your side

and when she leans over to kiss your forehead, her gorgeous locks framing her face while her cute glasses slip down her nose 🥹🥹🥹 IM GONNA CRY

tldr; the softest girl that just wants to be loved the way she loves you 😔

[on-leatheredwings]

i've found your account only a few days ago but ever since then I've been STUCK here rereading your fanfics, especially ones with damian. i wasn't even a dc fan (heard about some stuf, watched some films and cartoons, but that's it) but now im reading comics since im Obsessed and need more batboys in my life (rip my productivity😔)

Anyway, after Sleepover i'm curious what will Bruce (and maybe even Thalia) think of batboys strange behaviour towards reader. He's smart, so he definitely notices it early on, but how he'll react....

I can see him being weirded out (like he was by Jason's anger issues, before his death), but he also can be an enabler, since Robin (literaly any of them) had a hard life, so if those relationships can help him why not pretend that everything is normal? you'll be safer in a Wayne's Manor anyway

All in all, thanks for a new hyperfixation 💞💞

P.s. About games:

1. Boyfriend to death 1&2 - since you're into yanderes you might want to check this game out. I prefer the second game, but the first is also fun. But beware the trigger warnings!!

2. Long live the Queen - more of a raising sim than dating sim but you still can romance some guys and girls.

,3. Hatoful Boyfriend - mostly a comedy, but there is a yandere.

4. The Royal Trap - it's been a long time since i played it, but it used to be one of my favorites so i'll just mention it.

5. Higurashi - once again not really a romance sim, but its an interesting horror mixed with a slice of life

;A; AWWWW THANK YOU IM SO HAPPY YOU LIKE MY STUFF.... THAT MAKES ONE OF US GIJSDOFAFGHFOJDSD

and yes yes get into DC!!! (girl who hasnt even read a full run since like. injustice)

damn now you got me thinking and excited. incoming spiel

i agree entirely about bruce just knowing how Bad things can get, so to make things simpler, he's like "yes, your darling(s) can stay in the manor, boys. 🙄"

mmm yes..... when it comes to bruce noticing the batboys are yandere, i think it's always sinfully delightful to just have him be reluctantly okay with it. 😈 it's also easier narratively ngl but i also like the idea that the batfam is all just corrupted.

bruce's thoughts are that they (his sons) fight for vengeance and justice but this is where they could use some leeway.... we all need our vice... they fight so hard for gotham, they deserve a little treat (getting rid of your human rights)... it's very "Dad who wants his sons to have happiness even if its not healthy" of him. in fics where bruce is a yandere, well, he's the exact same way so he can't judge. although if that's the case, i like the idea of bruce just being like "yes what we do isn't right. let's not talk about it. just don't kill <3"

still wondering what i like more. a yan!bruce who's self aware what he's doing is wrong but he just refuses to think about it. or a yan!bruce that justifies it all because of his paranoia, Tower of Babel style (if you don't know, that's when it's revealed batman has plans to subdue/kill the justice league just in case they go rogue.)

for the batboys depends on their personality... for damian, he's so resolute in things that i prefer when he just believes 100% what he's doing is okay, if not actually righteous. ^_^

hmmm talia.... I'M STILL UNSURE HOW I PREFER THAT AS WELL... i think talia being a you-arent-good-enough-for-my-son mom is a little cliche but also. she kinda would say that. you'd have to prove your worth somehow but idk how tf darling would do that LOL. in the end, i think talia is just relieved/comforted that her son indeed feels desire and wants love and will continue the family legacy (regardless if youre afab/can biologically have children.)

no THANK YOU FOR THE ASK!!! AND THANKS FOR RECS!!!! heheh yeah ive checked out btd and im not averse to the warnings its more like im not that most of into the designs ngl. fox guy seems cute? AND LMAO FUNNY BC IM ON A HIGURASHI REWATCH (never played it tho)

[ominous-feychild]

Guys I literally JUST realized a thing about my autism/masking/alexithymia. I noticed there was an alexithymia tag here on tumblr and when I investigated, there was this one post listing these symptoms:

and I just--

I've had these exact, MAJOR struggles through my whole life for one.

But for two, and what's really interesting in my opinion...

Yesterday, I was having a video call with my mom. I've been off of some medications that I'm supposed to be taking because of financial issues, so my mental is NOT in a great place and I've had NO spoons for the past month. But while on call with her, she seriously, unironically, asked me if I thought I really needed the meds. Because, apparently, I "wasn't acting like I needed them" or something like that. And I'm sure I don't need to explain why that pissed me tf off.

But, like... at the time, the closest thing I could come up with for an answer was that "I have no spoons and no energy to do anything"; "I lived 17 years without meds, I kind-of know how to fake it"; and "I haven't had much socializing lately, so I have enough Social Energy™ to fake being okay right now."

Now that I'm not being put on the spot and after reading that post, I'm slowly figuring out that I've always done this. I mean, I've obviously always struggled to describe my own emotions and need to analyze my physical reactions to figure them out, but like. I'm just now starting to realize that I've really struggled to describe exactly how I'm "feeling bad" or, in fact, that I am feeling bad at all.

I mean, again, considering the alexithymia, that last part is a given. But it's kinda putting into perspective exactly how I've always had to understand "I don't have the energy to do anything" or "it's incredibly difficult to do anything" or "something deep inside of me feels Wrong™ and I can neither address nor identify it". I'd just passively have those "feelings" and struggle to continue life despite them.

It brings back thoughts of my struggles with masking, and how I was never diagnosed with autism as a child. Looking back, it should've been incredibly obvious. I had SO many of the tell-tale signs. But I guess it wasn't today, and there wasn't anywhere near as much awareness of what those signs were... but really. Textbook.

I'm sure my masking made it more difficult to recognize the signs as I got older. Hell, I even read over different "autism diagnosis checklist"s countless times, thinking to myself "oh wow it's a lot like me!... exceeeeeptttt--" and moved on from there.

I keep digressing. My point is, since discovering my autism and how it was hidden by masking, I've always wondered where my mask ends and where I begin. Most of the time, I feel like I feel nothing, even when I'm not depressed. I've been told I don't show my emotions, like when I'm happy (aka my chest is light and I feel free). That, or people can't tell when I like/dislike them (though that's partially a trauma thing). Other times, I've been told I'm smiling when I didn't even realize I was happy, much less that I was actually smiling. Some people have told me I'm incredibly easy to read, that my emotions show very clearly. But how can they when I feel like I feel nothing?

Which leads me back to what I said earlier, my conversation with my mother. How she asked if I actually need my meds because "I don't seem like I do". I guess I kind-of understand now, why she might've seen it that way. Do most people always show signs of how they actually feel? And how does the fact that I "don't feel" effect what I show?

I've wondered about that for a while. How much of how I act is because I was trained to, one way or another? How much of the emotion I show is because I learned to? Do I even show the emotions I feel? I really can't know because the people I know irl, who would better be able to tell me how I act, aren't understanding of any of these things. My older sister is lowkey ableist and thinks she sees the grand plan of the universe, my mother is too "pull yourself up by the bootstraps!!!" to accept Spoon Theory or mental health struggles, and just about everyone else in my life comes and goes as quickly as the wind.

Anyhow, this was a long rant that I've kinda had half-formed thoughts about for a while. Thanks for reading, hopefully this can help or entertain whoever stumbles upon this?

[porcupine-girl]

Our Song S3: Commercial Break

While I work on editing episode 5, I've posted a special chapter on AO3, with all the Our Song-related stuff I saw (and bought) in China!

You can read it here on AO3 or below the cut:

First off, a literal word from our sponsor: I found a UBEST ad. For a country where a lot of the population is lactose intolerant, there are a lot of milk ads. I guess when a lot of your potential market is lactose intolerant you have to advertise your milk more heavily than here.

I very much wish I'd been able to see someone in concert while I was there, but nobody I could find happened to be playing either of the cities on the few days I'd be there (Joker played Beijing DAYS after I left! 😫). But I did see ads for Jam Hsiao coming to Shanghai in August:

Wait... Who tf is Jam Hsiao, you may ask? You'll find out in episode 5!

Thanks to a tip from marlo-noni on tumblr, I found two "idol stores" in the Shanghai Jing'an Joy City mall, which were ground zero for merch. These stores were about 75% K-pop, but there was a decent amount of merch for Chinese singers and actors, along with a few current cdramas.

Photo cards are very popular, little playing-card-sized random photos of celebrities, some of which look official and some of which look like selfies from their social media. You can buy these singly, or in packs of like ten, or in actual decks. I didn't buy any, but I saw some for both Wang Sulong and Joker Xue:

I also saw some for Zhou Shen, who was in Season 1 of Our Song, but I forgot to take a photo of those. The first store especially also had a ton of these 6"x18" double-sided banners. This was the only Liu Yuning merch I saw on my trip! There were a ton of these but I bought these two, LYN and Joker (photos show first one side and then the other):

In the second photo, the text on Joker's banner reads 你是我今生未完成的歌 (You are the unfinished song of my life), lyrics from his song 未完成的歌 (Unfinished Song) from his 2009 album of the same name. The text on LYN's banner reads 一束光 / 黑夜的2 (A beam of light in the dark of night 2). 黑夜一束光 is the name of one of the songs on his 2019 album 十.

I also bought this Joker Xue bookmark (front and back):

The first idol store was also where I got an ACTUAL PIECE OF OUR SONG MERCH! It's got Xiao Zhan, who was on season 1, not 3, which you can watch here (it says 2 but it's 1)—the store had a whole section for Xiao Zhan merch.

Honestly, I almost didn't notice it in with all the other Xiao Zhan stuff—I don't even remember him wearing this outfit, though apparently he wore it for some of the promotional photos like this one. I eventually noticed the Our Song logo, though. I have to wonder if I would have seen other Our Song merch around if I'd actually been in China while it was airing, or if this was only made because of XZ's popularity (as a singer, overall he's not nearly as big a star as some people they've had on the show, but among people who shop at idol stores he may be the biggest lol).

My white whale of this trip was to buy at least one actual physical CD from an artist I like, or at least someone I know of. I asked on multiple subreddits where I might be able to buy CDs in China, only to be told over and over again that Chinese artists don't release physical media anymore and nobody cells Chinese CDs. The closest thing I got to a real answer was someone who suggested a bookstore chain they thought might maybe stock CDs at some locations, but with the warning that they probably mostly or only sold western artists. This turned out to be the biggest bookstore chain in China (and run by the government, unsurprisingly); I went to at least a couple different locations as well as many other bookstores and not a single one had CDs.

Finally, a couple days from the end of my trip, I was looking for more idol stores in Beijing and had the idea to Google where to get K-pop stuff, since the idol stores were mostly K-pop (the idol stores actually did sell K-pop CDs, as did a couple other places I saw, but not a single Chinese CD). This is what finally led me to a blog post about places to get K-pop stuff in Beijing, including CDs, which mentioned the store Disc in the Chaoyang Joy City mall! (Joy City seems to be a big mall chain in China, I went to two different ones in Beijing on top of the one in Shanghai.)

Unfortunately, once I got inside there were signs saying no photos - I'm not really sure why, but I really didn't want to get kicked out so I didn't take any! Which is a shame, because talk about hitting the jackpot! The very first thing I saw when I walked in was a bunch of George Lam CDs, along with Hacken Lee (who was a senior in S1).

I have no idea how the discs were organized, honestly. I think maybe the first section was Cantopop, since George and Hacken both recorded mostly in Cantonese and there was also a lot of Wang Fei (who has never been on Our Song afaik but I have some of her songs, she's recorded in both languages). Then was clearly Mandarin stuff, and maybe vaguely sort of in alphabetical order but not very strictly? And maybe also by genre? There were no signs on the shelves that I could find explaining the organization, listing genres or anything.

I opened my notes app and made a note with "Where can I find these?" in Chinese along with a list of the artists all in hanzi, but thankfully the guy I found to help me actually spoke pretty good English. I still showed him the list because it just seemed easiest. He knew exactly which ones they had in stock and where to find them.

They had two of Penny Tai's albums, a couple from Wang Sulong, a bunch of albums from Da Zhangwei's band The Flowers, one Da Zhangwei CD/DVD, and a bunch of Joker Xue albums. (As an example of the weird organization, the Da Zhangwei album was shelved with the Flowers albums, which suggest genre but not alphabetical, and Joker's stuff was on an endcap in a totally different part of the store that I never would have found.) I wound up buying a Flowers double album and Joker Xue's latest, Countless (I already knew I loved the title track from this album):

I will not say how much I paid for these; let's just say that the Joker CD was somewhat reasonably priced while the Flowers CD, which was released in 1999 and this is probably a copy from then, cost way more than I was hoping to spend. 😬 But I have yet to find a single Flowers album on eBay or yesasia.com or even iTunes—the few Flowers songs I have in my playlist I've ripped from YouTube—so I bought it. The guy helping me actually handed it to me telling me it was their best album; I'd assumed he was trying to sell me the most expensive one but believe it or not this double album was actually the cheapest one they had! I forget which album it was but one of the Flowers CDs was going for 1000RMB ($137)!

Joker's album, Countless, cost a little more than I'd normally pay for a CD in the US, but when I got it home and finally opened it, it very much earned that price! I was not expecting it to be full of more merch. It's in a very nice grey box to start with, then on top there was a black envelope that, when I opened it, contained several index-card-sized black and white photos of Joker. Plus instead of just simple liner notes with lyrics, there was a full little photo book, with the lyrics on the smaller black half-pages in between:

Also! I could not get a photo of this, but I heard Hu Xia's song 那些年 (which you'll see him perform soon) in the wild! We were eating breakfast at a pastry shop in Beijing and they were playing it! What's really funny is that my son realized it at the exact same time I did—"Mom, this is a song from your playlist!"

Of course, Our Song merch wasn't all I was looking for in China—to see some of the other merch and ads I saw, keep an eye on my PG Goes to China tag on Tumblr; I made some posts while I was there but I'll also be posting several themed roundups over the next couple of weeks! I might even post a few photos of boring things like the Great Wall and Forbidden City.

I promise next time I will be back with more actual Our Song. Until then, here is 无数, the title track I love so much from Countless:

[dynared]

I've been meaning to ask, what do you mean when you say that the people on the TFwiki hate the Japanese Transformers material? I know they hate Kiss Players (like most of the rest of Western TF fandom does), and Transformers Energon (same thing there), but aside from those two, I'm not sure I've really noticed anything about how they talk about JP TF media that would suggest they hate or are dismissive of it.

I'm going to give them credit where it's due, the TFWiki has recently (as in this year recently) undergone a massive cleanup campaign to fix a lot of issues with their Wiki against Japanese concepts.

Prior to that, you would just naked insults of the Japanese shows compared to their Superior Western counterparts -

Yeah, because Season 4 of G1 was just this bastion of animation wonder.

You'd also get blatant editorializing -

This is in regard to the Transformers Legends comedy manga.

It wasn't even consistent. You'd get homophobic jokes about characters and panels in one article, and this sort of editorializing against jokes in another. The only consistency was that "Japanese concepts suck". This all pretty much culminated in an article called "Burning Justice" which was just them saying super robot concepts were stupid.

And naturally, since IDW writers were from the Wiki or wanted to appeal to it, you got those attitudes in those stories. Hence decisions like Star Saber being a religious fundamentalist nutjob and "___Master" concepts not being touched for fear of catching a case of the weeb.

Apparently, as per the Wiki itself, they got a lot of people who did genuinely hate the Japanese stuff for not fitting their ideal image of Transformers (like a certain group of writers) and they straight up made things up and filled the Wiki with snark and insults. And those attitudes transferred to official materials like the IDW comics, which was frustrating to say the least. Seeing their expulsion from the official materials meanwhile, has been welcome.

[megaawkwardhuman]

I've said it once and I'll say it over and over again

my personal definition of insanity is trying to make sense of details that were probably just overlooked in a show

with that being said here's my theory on the whole killing someone's sire = bad things and how can still be true

warning: I'm aware this is like 99% bullshit and prob doesn't make sense I'm just having fun and dealing with gay vampire withdraw by having a category 5 hyper fixation event

OK OK SOOOOO as we know nandor was able to kill derek without killing gullermo (all it did was make him human)

which makes no sense since not that long ago nandor was freaking out about the baron dying and back in season 3 he tried his darndest to make sure the sire didn't die so that all of vampire kind wouldn't die

now a common theory I see is that the main reason why killing those two would be bad while meanwhile killing derek wouldn't be as much is a matter of the person ageing the amount of time they spent as a vampire (as seen by guillermo growing a beard and longer hair when being made a human again) so if a vampire who lived past a human's life expectancy they would just die

and yeah I fully believe that

I mean it makes a lot of sense

but it wouldn't explain why killing the sire would kill ALL vampires

sure it'd kill vampirism but not the younger vampires themselves

this is where my bs theory comes in!

now despite being bitten a month ago guillermo was only by the looks of it (I'll get into what I mean later) a FULL vampire for not that long (as seen by his outfit not changing at all from finally drinking blood to the party to the fake ceremony)

sooooo what if when nandor killed derek it was in a small period of time where under specific circumstances it WAS possible to kill the vampire who turned guillermo?

let me explain

so to be a vampire you kinda have to be dead

but what exactly kills you? (if you die purely due to the bite)

back in season 1 what kills jenna is a fever induced by the vampire cells so most likely that's what normally kills you

or at least the process most likely takes a while to kill you

but what if it (the vampire cells) didn't kill him

you see as we know his van helsing blood has been fighting off the vampirism with all its might ever since he got turned by derek (which is why memo was a weird half vamp all season)

and when guillermo died it was for a very VERY short period of time

so what if his van helsing blood brought him fully back to life?

like memo was dead enough for long enough to jump start the processes power wise but due to the van helsing blood fighting back and bringing him back he was going through all of that while still alive

OR he did die but not fully

like I said before guillermo's death was surprisingly short

well what if instead of being brought back by van helsing blood what if it wasn't able to bring him fully back so instead made it so that he didn't die fully (which was the best it could do)

with that being said however I personally believe that if nandor waited until the next day it prob would have been too late

for you see I think drinking blood not only finished giving guillermo his powers I also think that it would have also led to the vampire cells realizing that guillermo either isn't dead or isn't fully dead

so IF guillermo said he wanted to stay a vampire OR if they waited any longer they couldn't have turned him human again by killing derek since he would have fully died by then

so with all of that being said I think under normal circumstances if you killed the vampire who turned you after being fully killed by vampire cells you die

but if you were brought back through other means or you kill them BEFORE you fully die you go back to how you were pre bite

now you're probably wondering WHY TF WOULD NANDOR KNOW ALL OF THIS!?!?

weeeeeeell remember the trip he promised guillermo back in season 3?

while I do believe he wanted to make turning him a trip to make him realize what he'd lose as a vampire

I also think that he probably did some research in the council library beforehand

so that IF guillermo still wanted to become a vampire

and guillermo learned the hard way that he couldn't handle being a vampire

well...

at least his last memories with guillermo would be nice before he "fixed guillermo's problem" if you catch my drift

tl;dr: normally killing the vampire who turned you would actually kill you but due to blood bullshit™️ and timing nandor was able to kill derek without killing guillermo and make him human again

also he knew this shit cause he looked into it before the trip he planned all the way back in season 3 as a plan if shit hits beyond the fan

[davisexplainableart]

Never mind, I got it posted on time.

September 30 - October 1, 2024 - Me as a Hoola (digital version):

So, back in June, I thought I'd do another TF related to gender change. But this time, I decided to become something more… monstrous.

For those unaware, this creature comes from a mobile game called "My Singing Monsters", where you collect monsters to create music. While I've never played the game myself, I've known about it for quite a few years now. This is because I found out about the percussion-based rock monsters known as "Noggins", since videos about them always came up whenever I searched for Youtube videos about the old Nickelodeon + Sesame Workshop collaboration channel that later became a now-defunct app called "Noggin".

And when I found out about the somewhat easy-to-draw designs of the PomPoms and the Hoolas, I decided to TF myself into one of those 2.

I chose a Hoola because I've never cared for using pompoms or cheerleading (even as Caroline), but I do remember having fun with hula hoops as a kid.

Also, I've numbered every sketch on the page in the order I drew them.

Me (as Davis) changing into a Hoola. As you can see, I got a kick out of me growing pectoral muscles (since I don't have any as Scorpi).

Me showing off my hula hoop skills. As a kid, I liked spinning hula hoops on my arm, and it seems that I've still got it after all these years (or maybe it's just because I've become a monster who specializes in that stuff).

For those wondering, the thing between the back of my head and my ponytail is actually part of my skin, and I am unable to take it off. However, I have wondered what it would like if I was actually able to take it off and let my hair loose.

If it wasn't obvious, real Hoolas are not this plump and heavy. As usual, it's just personal preference. But recently, I've been wondering if it's possible for me to be both heavy and strong at the same time. I decided to do a bit of exercising, using hula hoops of course. For this sketch, I drew what I probably looked like spinning hula hoops on both of my arms while doing squats for a minute.

The exercising started out with me properly focusing on what I intended to do, but then by the time I got to the stretches, I uh...

Well, uh... let's just say that I got too lovestruck over my massive size and um... er...

*sigh* Dang it, just thinking about what I did next is making me horny...

I think we'll just stop there.

[this-daydream-is-dangerous-13]

With the tf talk being about being your higher self before union can happen without getting into the same cycles (going round and round), was wondering if happiness could have a deeper meaning or am I reading too much into it?

''And in the disbelief, I can't face reinvention I haven't met the new me yet'

'When did all our lessons start to look like weapons'

'All you want from me now is the green light of forgiveness You haven't met the new me yet And I think she'll give you that'

Some other lyrics from top of my head that this tf talk had me thinking of (long reach but may as well mention) -

In the song him , it starts with

'So you were right There’s always two The one who stays, and the one who’s leaving you

Which can describe the runner/chaser dynamic. Usually switches back and forth as well due to energies.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=hIb47tXFbCo

I've seen people asking why never on the same page etc and the above vid would make sense until growth has happened.

In coney island -

'Break my soul in two looking for you But you're right here If I can't relate to you anymore Then who am I related to?'

Song seven etc could relate to them actually always been connected even though not physically?

And when I was shipwrecked (Can't think of all the cost) I thought of you (All the things that will be lost now) In the cracks of light (Can we just get a pause?) I dreamed of you (To be certain we'll be tall again) (If you think of all the costs) It was real enough (Whether weather be the frost) To get me through (Or the violence of the dog days) (Out on waves being tossed) I swear (Is there a line that we could just go cross?) You were there

Cracks of light seems to be a common thing with them and that one account.

Also dreams /connections feeling as if other person is there is a common thing tf? I think they both mention dream/daydreams in songs.

The song she could have deeper meanings too.

Sweet creature -

'We don't know where we're going but we know where we belong'

'And ohhhh, we started Two hearts in one home'

'Wherever I go, you bring me home Sweet creature, sweet creature When I run out of road, you bring me home You bring me home'

Anon, these are all really terrific points!

My initial tendency (which might surprise you all) is to assume that lyrics are about the likeliest possible subject/the one the artist says. That means that for evermore, quoted above, I automatically thought YB. But when she played it live—without the haunting Bon Iver contribution—I started rethinking:

- shipwrecked, and I thought of you? Dreamed of you in the cracks of light? “It was real enough to get me through and I swear: you were there”?

Wasn’t YB physically with her at this time? And now with this new info…ooof. Yeah - this was not (just) a message for YB.

I would be remiss not to note that some of the references in happiness are to Fitzgerald’s The Great Gatsby:

- Daisy’s famous line “I hope she’ll be a fool—that’s the best thing a girl can be in this world, a beautiful little fool.”

- “the green light” of forgiveness.

And we know Blondie loves Zelda and F Scott Fitzgerald.

But yeah - those are great catches. And Sweet Creature and coney island.

Plus, you know my thoughts on seven:

And her desire to see and affirm and help the scared child in this song? Takes on a whole new meaning if it is underscored by a belief that they’ve always been connected. Oh god. Is this the “birthmark” in Little Freak, that she didn’t see until later?

I know so little about this, including the possible use of “stay” to indicate the runner/chaser dynamic. Nor the dream/daydream connection that is all over their lyrics.

Does the moon/Saturn come in here too?

Paging @womanexile who is working on a TF mega post.

Anon - thank you so much for this detailed ask!

[masterjedilenawrites]

Hello, m'lady!

If you don't mind, here are some incoherent thoughts about some of the Bois that came to my mind after reading around in your brilliant writing. You said you wouldn't mind my incoherent thoughts, so I thought I'd share them! (I'm still working on my incoherent Bad Batch thoughts, btw)

I want to hug Jesse. Like, he's hot as hell no questions asked, but I also just want to hug him. Like, a long hug. And tell him that he's loved and that he's enough and wonderful exactly as he is.

Also, I want to cook for all the clones, but these vibes are the strongest with Wrecker, and, for some reason, Hardcase and Fives.

Also, my ideal date is going to one of those public strawberry picking fields where you can just... walk around and fill your basket with strawberries, and afterwards go home and bake strawberry cake, and I'm going to drop that in this context.

Also I find it so interesting how non-commitical Rex actually is; like, who would've guessed that a guy with such a spit-death-in-the-face attitude on the battlefield would be so scared to let someone into his heart.

Also, I low-key wanna call Cody Marshall Commander, Sir and see what happens >:3

I haven't even consumed any Delta Squad material, but solely the writing on this blog made me love them all and (idk, maybe they've met in canon XD) I think Boss and Cody would get along.

And someone should tell Fixer to go tf to sleep, I'm sensing that he doesn't do that *nearly* enough.

Someone should also tell Kix that always putting others first and neglecting his own needs is not what being a good, compassionate person is about, and that he's worth it.

I could go on and on, damn, but lemme just say that your depiction of the Bois really helped shape a more 3-dimensional and rich picture of them in my head and that is awesome :)

Also thank you sm for my date set-up again, I'd 100% ask the dear commander for a second date.

I've been thinking about these gems nonstop since you dropped them in my inbox! 💙 I love getting thoughts like this so keep them coming! I don't get to talk about these wonderful clone men IRL so this is my only outlet 😅

And just so you know, I did intend to respond like a normal person and just... piggyback on your thoughts, share a few of my own, call it a day... but then my hand slipped and now I have 8 whole one-shots to share instead 😳😳

So, in honor of May the Fourth, I've got my 8 stories queued up to post throughout today (5/4), all based on what you shared here! We've got hurt/comfort, we've got silliness, we've got slice-of-life, we've even got some spice.... I had so much fun writing these and I hope you all enjoy them! 

Thanks for the inspo, friend! Wishing everyone a fantastic Star Wars day! 🌟

JESSE

Jesse definitely needs a good, solid hug every once in a while. Be prepared for his reaction, though, it'll be quite an emotional moment for him...

WRECKER (+Fives and Hardcase)

They do say the way to a man's heart is through his stomach...

BLACKOUT

Why not go on this ideal date with your new beau, Blackout? 😃

REX

His fear of commitment is interesting, huh? But he does have many loved ones who will help him work through that fear...

CODY

Oh boy, you'd best be ready for a long night after a line like that...

BOSS & CODY

They're leaders with different styles, different responsibilities, different crews... and yet they're bonded together like two old men who just met in the power tools aisle...

FIXER TECH

Actually, I headcanon that Fixer is an early bird. It's more likely that someone would tell him to go back to sleep.

Tech on the other hand...

KIX

There aren't a lot of people Kix would listen to if they told him that. Thankfully you're one of them...

[cock-ainee]

I fucking hate my father. I despise him. I hope he dies and leaves me, and my mom the fuck alone.

I hate how he makes me feel fucking worthless even though he's the one that ruins my whole life. From the beginning to start. I hate how for the most of my life, i felt like what he does to me is normal. That every kid is forbidden from watching stupid fucking tv (TOTALLY), that every kid gets yelled at and hit all the time. It was just a few years ago that i started realising that what he does is seriously fucked up. For me it's just another shitty day, but if someone "normal" knew what was going on their brain would fucking explode. It's been quite a lot of time since he's been regularly beating me up, but i don't know if what he does now isn't even worse. It's not like i take anything he says really to me, but it just frustrates me so much that i'm getting mentally abused even though i've done nothing wrong. His constant complaints about my weight (made by a bastard who's fucking obese) and hearing that i'm stupid, useless and other shit are driving me insane.

Lately my mom said something about my cousin passing the matura with 100% from math. It was during diner. What did that dick say??

"if (...) ate all this she'd pass that too"

Yeah??? Maybe i'd have a chance to pass with such a score if i studied, instead of overworking my ass off for nothing. Because nobody pays me here. They just demand i work 24/7 instead of giving any attention to school and still do good. It worked in primary school because i was just smart. But i'm in fucking high school, and i should study if i want to even just pass the fucking matura. But what can i do, when after i come back from school i immediately go to work, and when i actually get back home i'm exhausted?? Totally?? Even worse on days off of school. I sometimes overthink, thinking that I'll never get anywhere, i won't pass those stupid exams. And yk what?? Matura is useless on it's own. I'd have to go to college to actually get any job qualifications. But i'm not fucking planning to. I'm done with all this crap. And i wouldn't make it. I can't even talk to people, because i'm fucking afraid, how am i supposed to get a job.

And even if i get one, how am i supposed to last. My back hurts so fucking much already, and i'm always sore somehow. I've worked since i was a kid and that's already taking a toll on me. I'm worn out.

I don't even know how he can sleep peacefully, knowing he's ruined a person. That his own kid hates him. That his own kid wonders why she was even born, and what has she ever done to be born where she was. That his own kid wants to kill herself. I don't know how tf he doesn't feel guilty.

My older stepsis moved away as soon as she turned 18. She always hated me, because her and mom had to move to our house when mom got with my mother. I always hated her too, we were fighting a lot, but i guess she understood she's not the only one, and that i'm suffering exactly the same thing. We're on good terms with each other. At least that's good.

I want to leave, but i can't. I can't tell anyone about this, or there will be a huge drama, probably i'd get taken away from my family, and i don't want to be dependent on anybody, because as soon as i can i wanna get away as far as possible. I just need 2 fucking years, I'll be an adult and finish school if i'm lucky enough. If i pass this year. I probably would, if not for math. But my teacher is nice, i should be able to do something about it at least.

Do yall want to know who you're talking with though? You're talking with a person who slept outside, or snuck in trough the window because she's been to afraid to open the front door while walking into the house. With a person who hid from her father because he was angry. A girl who got judged for every single thing she did

When i see or hear other dads, who are supportive towards their kids i want to cry. I just wish i was born into a normal family, and felt loved.

(i'm putting that "for adults" thingy because i don't want my post to be immediately visible, like, i think what i just said was cringe but i needed to vent a lil even if nobody listens)

[tophat-cy]

It's that time of the year again, huh?

Hello everyone! Here is TopHat_Cy with probably the last Tumblr post of this year. Since 2023 is coming to a close, I'll just put down a little summary of the experiences I had this year. Let's get started ^v^ ✨💗!

⚠️CW/TW since there may possibly be some ranting and/or venting at some points⚠️

To be honest here, 2023 was pretty rough, and I'm not talking about that I had the baccalaureate in June, oh no. I was honestly waiting for that time so I can just do myself after that, right after I supported 4 years in that hellpit people called it high-school (or pedagogic college...whatever 🙄), just to get like over 3 months later on a worse hellpit called college, where all my personal issues has awakened...and felt horrible and lonelier like I've never been.

Despite being in overall horrible, high-school was great because mostly because I wasn't feeling the loneliness and self misery I feel now. Now that I'm at college I get almost hit daily by the fact that 1) I'm lonely and I'll always remain lonely (since who tf wants a little antisocial freak who literally draws all day lmao??) 2) I'm worthless, mostly because my French skills (at least) suck, and a good amount of my marks suck as well in comparison with other students (and honestly I wouldn't be bothered that much about this fact if it wasn't for my mom who haves the great habit to remind me by times to make sure I take big marks only to get the scholarship, hahahaha shut up bitch), which guess what, it makes me feel ✨horrible✨, and 3) Your life is a pure lie. This is sooooooooooo great isn't it :D ??!

*sigh*

I realized within my current college experience that I'm lonely not only in society, but with my own mom. I realized I'm even more of a worst daughter than I ever thought...I realized that I'm getting more horrible as the time goes by, or at least this is how I feel. I feel like losing myself slowly, becoming into nothing but a setinent shell of the former self. With those realizations, I'm getting hit in the face once again by the most saddest fact that I've encountered so far in my life but I always tend to forget it to make myself feel better (but you know how life is...it needs to offer you some lemons in the eyes 👁️👁️)...

...the fact that my life is nothing but a pure LIE.

But hey! Can we look into the bright side of what this year offered for some hot minutes?? It's not all black and misery! I had part of wonderful and fun times with my boyfriend (we did Whiteboards and rambled about our silly stuff like two neurodivergents that we are 😁✨), I had part of several fanart moments from people, I had Art Fight (yeaaaaah, our old pal Art Fight, which kinda started to become a pain in the ass every year when I have to bring my REFs up to date for this event...mmmmmmm 😊/pure af hot sarcasm, but honestly here, do I really care :D ???), I even joined my first Original Characters Tournament, Ressurection, in which I met wonderful people which appreciate my skills and also willing to help and support. And most importantly, I had YOU! All of you! If it wasn't for you guys, I definitely wouldn't been here, sharing this thoughts with YOU. And I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart, once again ❤️!

As a mini conclusion to all of this speech, I'll admit that this year was still decent so far, with all it's ups and downs, along with the fact that I'm returning myself at being genderfluid (hence the Pic at the very beginning of the post lmao :')) )

The latest events from this year at least made me think that being feminine related makes me feel worthless about myself, and I don't want to feel like that anymore. I want to be strong at its full and I want to feel and be free with who I am. I'm not the most social person, yes. I'm far off from being a great daughter, yes of course, and I'm definitely far from being the best person out alive, or at least a great one. But at least I want to do something about it, so I can have the right to say that I tried my best for real.

So, that's it. I'm genderfluid. I go by he/they/cee from now on (although cee/ceer pronouns are most likely optional, like if you want to use them, go ahead, although I'll still be ok if you used the he/they ones, just don't refer to me with she/her or any fem aligned pronouns).

🌙⭐Plans for 2024⭐🌙

(aka my favorite part from this post so far 🤓)

Just like everyone else, I have prepared some future plans for the next year and which I'd like to share with you. Here they are!

I want to make EITHER an OCT or a world-building RP server somewhere around February-March or later (I would've done it sooner, but I have to prepare for the exam session in January). The OCT thing may take a while though since I want it to be good, so this plan might get extended for 2025 as well. As for the world-building RP thing, with some effort, it could be done next year.

Returning on developing some miscellaneous projects - those being Insanity AU and a somewhat game-like concept that my boyfriend made plans about it in this year and which I'd like to develop on. Insanity AU is a thing that I've made with dustyisegg back in 2022 but discontinued it for 9 months due to [DATA EXPUNGED] and resumed it's development, by remaking the characters and their plot entirely. (Dusty if you see this tell me if you still want to work on this, yeah yeah I'm a huge procrastinator lawl 👾✨)

JToH, JToH, JToH projects - my dear and beloved JToH...(I've been in this Fandom for almost 3 years...more than I've been in the Doll Eye one, can you believe that?). Most of those projects will consist on simply designing new towerhumans, respectively redesigning the old ones. Along with that I have a comic project which I will start making it's script soon enough, other side projects that I have in my mind...and JToHVerse, which I don't know when it's that going to be started (earliest date will apparently be around 2025, but let's see how the comic project goes 🤷🏻‍♀️)

Putting some content in Toyhouse - a thing that I should worry about eventually ;v;

GET YOUR ARTFIGHT SPIRIT BACK PSYCHE 😩!!!

The last but not the least...To start developing at least one of my original storylines FOR FUCK'S SAKE 😂😂😂!!!!!! I've been waiting for this for years already hajshshdvbssb :')) I'm not sure which of them is going to come out tho. Definitely not PK though, that one will most likely get an extend to next year.

So...I guess that's it??

I'm going to assure you with two things before I finish. First of them is that, again I think, I'm fine. I'm not upset or anything. I had hard times like everyone else (maybe) this year and I had to left it out somehow. But in rest everything is alright, so don't worry about me. I will keep existing for you and for what I love ^v^.

The second thing that I will say is about this blog. Starting with January 1st, I do not allow anyone below the age of 15 to interact. I have an age now, and at this point I want to entertain people, not to babysit them. So don't get upset if you possibly get blocked, that would be one of the reasons (I hope to remember to unblock you after you get the age hhgjgjfjf 😅)

That's it guys! If you read til here, thank you very much for the attention and time spent on reading this. Hope everyone haves a wonderful 2024 and nice days! See ya around 💗💗💗!

[return2zero]

I'm shaking and crying rn (I wonder who on earth would get this reference...) இ௰இ

Yes, the news has been announced on Twit--X... for a while but I finally got to play it. FINALLY. Finally, SEA region is no longer abandoned by SE (or Applibot in this case)!!!!

Seeing the whole story again in chibi form is just cute TwT Just sped run the Main and CC stories and unlocked First Soldier~ Can't wait to see that part of the story! (esp since I... have 0 clues how many times I've already replayed FF7OG... and CC at least twice now... just sped run those two parts)

I have such difficulty locating the gacha button for the longest time ... it's in the unexpected bottom left corner... huh. I wonder why. (probably to make sure ppl stop trying to gacha so much?? idk :v )

But yes... I think uh... this account is cursed? Very much so... I would love to just restart this account but I did get Aerith and Tifa's holiday weapons TwT...

TLDR: CLOUD WHERE TF ARE YOU?!?!?! WHY DO I HAVE EVERYONE ELSE'S 5* WEAPON BUT YOURS?????? (that 3* rarity boosted Buster Sword does NOT count)

Yes, I did buy the Cloud guaranteed weapon ticket, and there is the current 6-month anniversary Cloud and Glenn weapon banner... But... I want to know how long more do I gotta gacha til I get his 5* without needing those

At this moment though, I do hope there's a way to relive the previous event stories for the rest of us that completely missed it... and get the skins too...

[toraleistripe]

Okay, so I finished Jigsaw. But it's also occurred to me that I never made a post actually talking about Saw 3D as a whole, I just kinda lost my shit and spammed my dash for a while there 😅😅 So I'll be talking about Saw 3D first and then I'll make a separate post talking about Jigsaw. This, uh, this got kinda long, so brace yourself if you actually read this. Also I sorta lose my MIND once again near the end of this post 😅

SO BARELY ONE MINUTE IN, THEY DECIDE TO SHOW LAWRENCE GORDON

NOT THAT I LOST MY SHIT OR ANYTHING FKJGSLJDSLK

Nah, but I ABSOLUTELY lost my shit as soon as I saw him ngl. I was SO excited to FINALLY see what happened to him.

But they cut away from that pretty quick to show a Jigsaw trap set up in a public space. That was a BALLSY move, man, just setting it up where people walking by can see that. It kind of astounded me that more people weren't losing their shit over what they were seeing. I mean, yeah, it showed people looking concerned, but I would've been screaming my head off if I saw something like that in person. And from what I could tell, only ONE person used their phone to try to call for help?? That's fucked up. To be fair though, maybe more people were on their phones and I just missed it.

So Hoffman DID in fact survive the reverse bear trap. I thought maybe he could survive if he got immediate medical attention. But nah, man decided to just stitch his jaw back together himself. Okay then. Pretty boss move if I do say so myself, that was badass.

I wasn't really surprised when Jill went to turn Hoffman in. I kinda felt bad for her, she was clearly afraid he was going to come after her.

I was suspicious of Bobby's story right away when he was on that talk show, he just seemed so fake to me. When he showed his 'scars' at the meeting, bruh those didn't look that bad at all 😂 Not exactly the sort of wound I'd expect from a real Jigsaw survivor.

AND THEN HE SHOWED UP AND I LOST MY SHIT AGAIN FKGKSDJKSJD

Just seeing Lawrence for that one scene, just knowing he was ALIVE was amazing, holy cow, I was SO happy to see him!! He's been my favorite Saw character since day one, in case that wasn't obvious enough, and it drove me nuts that the movies kept name dropping him, but we never actually saw what happened to him. BOY DID THIS MOVIE CHANGE THAT!!

But I'm getting ahead of myself. Turns out I was right about Bobby being a fraud! I don't get why you'd want fame and notoriety from THAT though, I mean, falsely claiming to be the survivor of a Jigsaw 'game' seems like you're kinda asking to be kidnapped and stuck in an actual Jigsaw game, y'know. And look what freaking happened. I felt bad for Joyce though, that woman SO did not deserve to be there.

ONCE AGAIN, THEY MADE A TRAP THAT INVOLVED EYEBALLS AND I DID NOT LIKE IT, COULDN'T EVEN LOOK AT THAT SHIT 😭😭 I couldn't watch the scene where the guy glued to the car seat tore his own flesh off either, UGH, couldn't look at that, no siree.

The scene where Bobby pulled out his own teeth was pretty tough to get through too ngl. But I did kind of feel for him, he clearly loved his wife and was trying his hardest to save her. Had a hard time watching him pierce those hooks though his body too. Anything to do with eyeballs or flesh getting pierced/torn, BLEH, that's so hard for me to stomach 🤢

Hoffman gaining entry into police station in a body bag was a power move, Mark Hoffman is easily one of the most impressive characters I've ever seen in a movie, he just figures out such crazy, even creative ways to do shit.

And after Hoffman kills Jill and everyone else at the police station, after he blows up his workshop and gets ready to bail, thinking he really got off scott free, THEN SHIT GETS REAL, Y'ALL, LET ME TELL YA FKGKSJD

So when Hoffman first got jumped by the three people in pig masks, I immediately wondered who tf they were.

AND THEN

AND THEN

THE THIRD GUY TOOK OFF HIS MASK

AND IT TURNED OUT TO BE LAWRENCE MOTHERFUCKING GORDON

Y'ALL

I ONCE AGAIN LOST👏MY👏FUCKING👏SHIT

I WAS SHOOK

I SAT HERE IN SHOCK, BRUH

AND TO FIND OUT THAT JOHN LET HIM LIVE, THAT LAWRENCE BECAME JOHN'S APPRENTICE FKGJSKDJSKDJK

THAT HE HELPED JOHN WITH ALL THE GAMES THAT TOOK PLACE AFTER HIS OWN FKGJLSKDLSKDDKHGJHDFK

I COULD NOT EVEN FKGJSLJDSJFDJVBJSH

IT TOOK SIX MOVIES TO FIND OUT LAWRENCE GORDON'S FATE

AND I WAS SHOOKETH

THAT FINAL SCENE IN THE BATHROOM WHERE IT ALL STARTED

LAWRENCE LEAVING HOFFMAN CHAINED UP THERE

TAKING THE HACKSAW AWAY FROM HIM

"I DON'T THINK SO" 😏

UM, SIR, THAT MOMENT HAS NO BUSINESS BEING AS HOT AS IT IS, THE FUCK 😭😭

SO YEAH, SAW 3D KINDA FUCKED ME UP IN THE BEST WAY FKJGKJSDFDKJKSDJ

All in all, I thoroughly enjoyed it! It HURT to see Adam's corpse at the end ngl that was tough ;_; So I guess we're never gonna see Mark Hoffman ever again, WOW, what a way to go. Pure nightmare fuel right there, being chained up in a pitch black room with nothing but rotting corpses around you fkjgkdjsd he thought he was so slick, but by the end, he got straight up fucked.

AND I'M GONNA END THIS BY SAYING IT WAS WONDERFUL TO SEE LAWRENCE AGAIN, I WAS SO HAPPY TO SEE HIM AND KNOW THAT HE SURVIVED LIKE A BOSS 😭😭😭😭

[arrowheadedbitch]

Yep still going haha

Look at this bagdeee

No wonder Lassie wants a piece

Of course he wants to hit THAT

It's an undeniably sexy badge

Wayy better than those losers at the fbi

Shawn is forced to pull out his badge for something and Lassie faints when he sees it

He forgets how to speak entirely

@pineapple-psychic "mouth dry, struggling to breath, cannot focus on anything else, staring at the badge and shawn and going HHHNNNNGG"

The gang is worried he's having another stroke

Shawn's plan B if it ever gets revealed that he was never a psychic is to admit he's CIA and pretend it was a mission that got out of hand 👀

After Shawn gets his CIA job back, Gus is constantly noticing him paying for stuff with money he KNOWS he did *not* get from Psych

When asks Shawn just shrugs like he doesn't know where the money came from

Gus is very confused and kinda concerned to say the least

The DESPEREAUX dynamic thooo

I do kinda like to imagine Despereaux as separate tho, he mentions Despereaux to any of his friends (or bosses) in the CIA and they're like ????? Who is this twink you've been chasing? Why are you chasing this guy??? Your side job is so fucking weird, man.

I think the funniest thing is that in the ring episode, he pretends to be fbi

Like he COULD have pretended to be something he ACTUALLY was but he said No, fuck that, FBI

Can't have anyone suspecting he's tied to the CIA so he's gotta go FBI

And also he SAYS fbi then ACTS sooo cia which is even funnier

Most of the 57 weren't actually jobs, he's just counting all the covers he used for ✨���espionage ✨️

Sorry to bring back up the CIA au but it's all I've been thinking about all week,

I wanna see everyone, especially Henry, react to things he learned from the CIA

Henry KNOWS he didn't teach him that, how tf did he learn that, HENRY can't even do that

When asks he vaguely reference his "training" and now Henry is going crazy trying to figure out when he taught that

Imagine they catch Shawn and Scarlet sparring (literally just fighting, this barely counts as sparring)

They both are going over the top, it feels like a scene from a movie, scarlet jumps on a table and Shawn yells at her and she goes "Don't aim a gun at me scarlet, don't jump on the table scarlet, GOD you are impossible to please!", which is concerning, especially since Shawn is just *frustrated* about it

There's acrobatics, actual technique, they're throwing each other around like crazy, they're halfway talking in french

It'd be a great scene

If love to see the LOOK on everyone's faces

Especially Henry's

"Shawn, where did you learn to do all that??"

"My training"

"I DID NOT TEACH YOU THAT"

See also "Shawn, what do you mean you can withstand torture????" "I was trained against it." "Henry WHAT"

I just realised that Scarlet is pretty much just my own take on a River Song style character

She's just River Song but a different angle or smthn

You know those ||creepy serial killer apologists|| you see? Well I just had the thought that CIA Shawn has probably stopped some big bad guys and imagine he meets someone who is an apologist for some guy that he got locked up, and it wasn't an easy lock up, he got caught and ||tortured|| by this guy and this chick is talking about how he doesn't deserve to be locked up

And she's going on and on about how he isn't that bad a guy and Shawn's like "||He tortured people! You do know he tortured people, right?!||" and she responds "||Oh I'm sure it wasn't *that bad*. I bet all the people that reported him were just being *dramatic*.||" and Shawn is sitting there, eyes twitching, trying not to kill this bitch on the spot

@obsidiancreates "He pretends to be sent a psychic vision by a victim and described his own experience in detail"

Gus is sitting there like 👁👄👁 wut

@obsidiancreates ""Shawn how did-" "Let's not talk for a while""

I bet she doesn't even change her mind, those serial killer apologists are creepy and scary, like they genuinely scare me

Moving on to lighter territory, my girlfriend said it would be funny if all 57 of Shawn's jobs were under the CIA

He's just counting all his covers

@obsidiancreates ""This is a matter of national security." "I GET TO DRIVE THE WEINERMOBILE""

(Sid writes some of the best fanfiction I've ever seen and that might be the best line they've ever written)

You know that scene where Shawn is like "What, she's running!? In THOSE heels??" I think it'd be funny if he thought only CIA Agents could run in heels

For a split second he's like "Is this woman one of us,wtf??"

Back to the CIA thing for just a second because I feel like im gonna throw up if I don't share this idea right now, Operation Jury Duty is where Shawn goes on an elongated rant in the middle of the courtroom when Scar needs them distracted for some reason

He keeps going until she gives the signal that he can stop, the longest she ever made him keep going was 2 and a half hours

He was sooo mad at her. He was out of breath from nonstop talking and he looked like the craziest man alive

Making Shawn look dumber and crazier than usual is a feat that he is not happy she achieved

And that's all I have for now! ✨️🥳💕✨️🎉

PT6/6 ♡

Okay guys, time for a long overdue post

Welcome to my CIA!Shawn au

And yes most of this is copy-pasted from discord, leave me be

AU where Shawn used to be a spy 👀👀👀

Old spy partner coming to sb to ask for Shawn's help 👀

I'm more interested in how it would affect the *Despereaux* dynamic tbh

And yeah the traveling the world thing with the many many jobs was the perfect cover

Imagining secret agent Shawn au, him and his partner (her name is scarlet but he usually calls her one of those BAD James Bond ones) have a tactic they call Operation Stick It To The Man

Her name changes every mission like he pretends gus does, because she's a spy so sometimes she's Scarlet and other times she Sara or Debbie or whatever, ykniw

Stick it to the man: It's probably just Shawn goes in and fucks shit up, how he does it is up to him, judgement call, but being destructive is encouraged, while she sneaks in

Also, I don't know why I do this to myself but I came up with her real identity and it's Scarlet Featherman, don't ask why, it quite literally came to me in a dream

And yes she is fine with Shawn calling her Pussy Galore, she thinks is just as funny as he does

I love aus where it's like "Yeah, no, Shawn has had a SUPER high profile job before, in fact maybe he still has it now"

This includes but is not limited to "Oh no, he's a cop, just for a different department." "Yeahh Shawn is in the CIA, he's keeping so many government secrets right now" and "Shawn was a spy. He kinda left the organize and kinda didn't, it's complicated, let's go break something!"

The last one is mine btw lol

I've been thinking about it nonstop for daysssss

If I write it I'm naming the fic "Agent P as in Pineapple"

New OC: Scarly Feather

Lesson learned: Don't be eepy when thinking out an au

This is where we got a more specific channel and I moved there so I'll call that a good ending point

PT 1/?

[theasexuwhalestuff]

Thoughts while watching Part III of the Kenobi Series

Looking at the title card for the umpteenth time and wondering why tf they couldn't just have gone with Kenobi. Most people already call it that instead of his full name. Lesser chance for confusion, and sounds way better. Similar ring to Andor.

Was looking forward to seeing Obi-Wan resume his panic/anxiety attack and completely lose his shit. But I guess him calling out to his master for the millionth time also works.

But seriously, Qui-Gon you bitch where are you when your son needs you answer him FFS.

I really have to commend Ewan for his portrayal of Obi-Wan during this stage of his life. I know he's mentioned that he's had to relearn Obi-Wan's accent, and I can hear hints of his Scottish accent coming through, but something else still sounded off. It took me a while to figure out the way his whole inflection and tone had changed. This was a conscious choice on Ewan's part, since the Obi-Wan he's playing now is very different to the one he's played before. He's portraying a broken, dejected man, and it's reflected in the way he speaks and interacts with the world around him. He doesn't help the Jedi who sought him out, and is unwilling to help Bail. His attitude towards Leia borders on indifferent and in this episode he even snaps at her, saying not everyone is good. I mean sure she can be annoying and something of a know-it-all, but I don't think I could ever have imagined Obi-Wan snapping at a child during the prequel era. Gone are his easygoing smile, the somewhat dramatic cadence of his voice, and the sarcastic remarks. Goes to show just how much research and care has been put into the state the character is in at this point in time. A person's experience is truly what shapes them, and here we're fortunate enough to get a glimpse of who this man could be in much different circumstances, and just how much he can bend before he breaks.

Mapuzo is a nice planet. I like the aesthetic.

Leia's actress, Vivien Lyra Blair was likely only 8 years old during filming, and it doesn't help that she easily looks like she could be 6 at the youngest. Adorable and very talented though. I've seen some of her other work.

Leia stepping up to the role of caretaker, because really, this man needs some serious help.

Damn, Order 66 rlly did a number on the great Negotiator, huh? Man can barely form words.

Why tf is this dumbass wandering around planet-to-planet in his old Jedi robes and the most Jedi-looking outfit in existence. Couldn't have picked out a different colour?? Different style and cut of clothes?? You're public enemy number one, man. Common sense be flying out the airlock.

That slip-up in front of the troopers gave me second-hand embarassment.

Ok, nice save. Negotiator back in his element, kinda.

Aw, Obi saying he wishes he could say he was Leia's father, and being soft to her 😭

Remembering his parents and his baby brother goddamnit.

But why tf are they talking so freely at the back of that space truck.

Ok, I love that unlike in the prequels, The Mandalorian and The Book of Boba Fett, the fight scenes here are a lot slower since Obi-Wan is woefully out of practice, but is still kicking ass cuz well, Stormtroopers.

Leia running to Obi-Wan exactly the same way Grogu ran to his papa after being snatched by those bandits in Season 2 😭😭😭

Leia looking distraught and hugging Lola, so Obi-Wan goes to comfort her 😭❤

Quinlan Vos lives??? Also, Obi-Wan's tiny smile at finding out his little shit of a friend is still alive.

Reva starting to piss me off ngl.

Vader suddenly appearing with his saber scared the shit outta me.

Man rlly just took out his lightsaber only to immediately bolt outta there lmao.

Ok but when did lightsabers get so thick.

Im sorry but why are you walking away from Vader?? RUN my dude.

Yeah, this is why I loved The Mandalorian so much. Sick of Jedi and Sith devilry, and watching the SAME two men trade lightsaber blows, fucking boring. There's more to Star Wars than the fucking Jedi. Pls no more Jedi in future Mando seasons, Favloni 🤲

No rlly, how is he gonna come back alive after this? He's barely hanging onto life.

Yeah man, he's right. Really shoulda skewered this asshole when he choked his pregnant wife nearly to death. A child-killer not to mention.

I can already hear the dudebros lamenting the quality of the last epic duel lmfao.

WTF ANAKIN, DON'T BARBECUE YOUR DAD-BROTHER.

Letting Leia go alone was a stupid ass decision, but Tala and NED-B to Obi-Wan's rescue!

Run, Leia, run.