#since it's 10:30 pm when i draft this post | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

writer-and-artist27 · 2 years

Text

Tumblr Story: Foreign Memories

Note: A sequel to the previous short story, Not Just a Foreigner, for @exmeowstic. Because Foreigner Batin deserves more content, I feel.

I was listening to Little Nocturne from Toilet-Bound Hanako-kun’s soundtrack while writing this, so please enjoy! I also recommend Dokuhaku by Maaya Sakamoto as an alternative. :)

-----------------------------------

It was supposed to be another pitstop in the daily routine Robin found himself in at Novum Chaldea. Another shift where he was assigned to wake up the little sparrow from her daily nap. Even if she needed her rest, the good ol’ Dr. Roman always said she couldn’t sleep forever lest it worsen her sleep schedule at night. And seeing her sleepy face always did relieve the demons still resting on top of his heart. If he was lucky enough with the timing, he could probably sneak in a kiss or two just to give something back to the girl who kept giving to a rogue like him.

“Little sparrow, I’m coming in—”

It didn’t make opening her door to find the newest Foreigner Servant at her bedside any less “what the fuck.”

Robin knew that the Servant in front of him was supposed to be an ally. Any Servant who answered Vy’s call automatically received that label with only a few outliers to the rule (examples being Penthesilea and Columbus after Agartha’s bullshit). Still, if Abigail Williams from Salem was any indication, Foreigner Servants were still dangerous with their housing Outer Gods, and the figure known only as “Azathoth” in Chaldea’s databases was no exception. To see him lingering near Vy’s bed, holding her hand, reminded Robin too much of another Servant who tried the same thing in another time, with far more darker intentions, and they were a former Beast.

If a Foreigner was here—

The Yew Bow was already starting to form on his forearm when Robin realized something was tugging at him aside from the usual paranoia. Something oddly warm. “…What are you doing, Foreigner?”

Vy’s chest merely rose and fell underneath her blankets in a clear sign of sleep, matching the carefree smile covering the pale-skinned Foreigner’s face as he turned in his chair to look in Robin’s direction. Despite continuing to hold onto Vy’s hand, the eye on Azathoth’s armor did nothing but blink at him as his smile widened. “Looking after your Sleeping Beauty, Archer?”

“That doesn’t answer the question,” Robin bit out past a whisper, noting Vy’s steady breathing as he slowly walked closer, keeping an eye on both her and the Foreigner holding onto her hand the entire time. “What are you up to?”

“Nothing really, May King,” Azathoth purred, sounding like a schoolboy teasing a friend as he slowly let Vy’s hand go to tuck the girl further into her blankets. “Well, aside from waiting for when the lovable rogue prince wakes up the Sleeping Beauty with a kiss~!”

The fuck. “I’m not going to do that,” Robin snapped, dispelling the Yew Bow to come closer to Vy’s bedside, keeping a discrete hand on the hidden pouch on his clothes holding his poison needles just in case Azathoth had any funny business in mind. There was only so much he could do when Vy was so close by. It didn’t stop the oddly warm feeling in his chest from spreading. What was going on? “But the little sparrow does need to wake up now.”

“Then be my guest!” Azathoth’s smile didn’t even falter in the face of Robin’s apparent dislike — heck, it was like it merely widened in Robin’s direction as his purple eyes started sparkling with anticipation. Without a second to spare, the Foreigner then pushed himself back from the foot of Vy’s bed with one leg, allowing his chair to slide back on its caster wheels to give Robin more room to come in. “Don’t let me interrupt your fairy tale!”

“Yeah, yeah…” Robin said with the best bite he could muster in the face of those odd warm feelings — why were the feelings happening to begin with, Robin could’ve sworn he’d never met this Foreigner before Chaldea — turning back to Vy’s figure with a wry smile.

Even when tucked in and asleep, Vy still looked as innocent as ever. As if an Outer God couldn’t even disturb her.

At least one thing hasn’t changed.

Robin gently steeled himself against what would inevitably come and reached over with one hand to gently shake Vy’s nearest shoulder. “Little sparrow, it’s time to wake up.”

As expected, Vy made a sleepy “Muu” noise, shifting in her blankets to turn over onto her side, her hands curling into her pillow in a quiet protest. Some of her long brown hair fell onto her cheek with the motion, and Robin felt the smile grow on his face in spite of the spectator behind him.

“C’mon, Vy, you can’t sleep forever,” he continued gently, shaking her shoulder again. “I’d love to let you rest some more, but there’s still things you want to do today, right?”

That did it. Vy’s eyelids slowly fluttered open to reveal those large brown eyes reflecting Robin’s image, and Vy tilted her head at him in a daze. “Big… Robin?” A yawn left Vy’s mouth before she could stop it, resulting in her taking a second too long to bring her hand up to cover her lips as Robin slowly sat down on her bed to take her into his arms. Her hair care products were still gentle as always on his nose as he started absently brushing out tangles from her tousled locks. Whether or not Vy noticed the pounding of his heart against his chest, she didn’t say. Instead, she merely leaned into him with no resistance, murmuring, “Is it… is it that time already?”

“Just about,” he mused, ignoring the nearby snickering from his fellow Servant as he reached over to grab Vy’s glasses, offering them to the little sparrow once she started coming back into the world of the living with a soft shake of her head. Probably to take out the last bits of dreams, no doubt. Still looked cute. “Someone else beat me to seeing you, but that can be handled later.”

“Someone…?” Vy narrowed her eyes at the nearby wall once her glasses successfully rested against the bridge of her nose, and a moment was all it took for her to turn her head and notice the other Servant in the room. To Robin’s surprise, Vy then smiled like she was addressing an old friend. “Batin!”

Batin—?! Wait. Wait. Vy wasn’t one to come up with names on a whim. All her nicknames meant something. But this—

Robin felt his heart skip a beat. Why does that sound so familiar—

“Still calling me that, Master?” Azathoth put in for the first time since Robin’s arrival, his normally teasing voice a smidge softer in Vy’s direction as he crossed his arms over his chest. The eye in the center of his armor continued to move, almost looking like it was bulging outwards in response to Vy’s generally friendly aura — ew — contrasting the warm smile on Azathoth’s pale face. If Robin didn’t know any better, the Foreigner’s complexion seemed to turn a bit warmer with Vy’s call, his response being an equally warm, “Don’t you have better things to do than call out to me?”

“I do!” Vy gently pushed at Robin’s arms, leaving Robin with nothing to do but let her go in confusion as she got up from her bed, rushing over to—

Oh no, Vy, you can’t be—

Before Robin could comprehend what he was seeing, Vy was running over to the Foreigner, with her bare feet and baby-blue pajamas and all, just to jump up and wrap her arms around Azathoth’s neck in a tight hug.

WHAT THE—

Azathoth seemed just as befuddled as Robin, his arms limp as his purple eyes widened at what was Vy leaning against his front. “…Vy?”

Danger, DANGER, the little sparrow is—

“I didn’t forget you,” was all Robin could make out with his trained hearing, and then Vy pulled back to cross her arms behind her back, blushing enough to have her ears be colored pink from what Robin could see past her long brown hair. “And Outer Gods need hugs too! You deserve more than one anyways, Batin!”

Huh?

Azathoth gaped, and Robin knew it was time for intervention. He got to his feet almost immediately, but before the Yew Bow could materialize onto his forearm, Vy walked backwards fast enough for her head to gently bump his shoulder. She then leaned back enough for her gaze to meet his, and she smiled. “Anywho! My hug quota’s been fulfilled, so you can do whatever you’d like, Batin! For now,” Vy giggled weakly in Robin’s direction, her smile looking all the more hopeless, “let’s go, Big Robin?”

I dunno what I’m doing, please help?

Yep. Count on Vy to have a hopelessly naive idea like hugging a fucking Foreigner in the name of friendship.

Of course, Master. Robin didn’t need to be told that twice. What kind of rogue was he if he couldn’t teleport out of a room with his Noble Phantasm? “Sure, little sparrow.” To his fellow Servant, he saluted with two fingers. “See you around, Foreigner.”

By the time Robin pulled on his green mantle to conceal his Master for privacy and safety’s sake, though, he couldn’t shake off the last glimpse he got of Azathoth’s face.

In that moment, Azathoth looked more human than god with the baffled look in his violet eyes. Almost like he was seeing off a friend for what might be the last time.

10 notes · View notes

yvesdot · 3 years

Text

NANOWRIMO 2021 - BINGO!

I have far too many writing priorities to focus on just one, so here's my compromise: listing them out in bingo format and doing a bit for each. At the same time as all this, I'll also be editing FC near-daily and keeping up with my Patreon. I'll update this post daily with what I worked on. Good luck, NaNoers, and best wishes to my fellow Rebels!

EDIT: NaNo is over in my timezone! Read through all my updates below, along with my final wordcount (I won!) and an updated bingo, below that cut.

NaNo ask game・my askbox

NOTE: I'm not marking the bingos bingoed until the end of the event; I don't want to consider something 'done' until I've literally run out of time to do it. Then we'll see how much I did and whether I think I've finished.

DAY 1: 8211. Spent 12 AM to 6 AM writing The Proposal and editing KAY Chapter 1 to send out for critique. The Proposal is about halfway done now, and I'm happy with my edits. Managed 10 minutes of FC edits right before midnight-- what a mess my middle is.

DAY 2: 1733. Busy day-- got some important Life Things done! Just enough time to write for about 45 minutes straight; 15 minutes fixing up FC's editing doc, then 30 minutes for this week's Patreon post.

DAY 3: 3063. Spent 40 minutes right at 12:00 AM looking over critique on KAY's Chapter 1, then another 30 or so throughout the day, then a bit more time editing The Proposal. The draft isn't as bad as I thought it would be! Still only 1/2 written, but what's there seems fun. I didn't know whether or not to count time I spent at a physical critique for KAY with other writers, but for now I won't since I simply do not seem to need it.

DAY 4: 2585. 20 minutes right at 12 continuing to read through The Proposal, just because I really find it that engaging. Of course, it is MILF4MILF. Later in the day, around 45 minutes writing up this week's Patreon post. Gotta go fast!

DAY 5: 1258. Friday, which is the toughest-- have to write just before Shabbat, and all I managed was the Patreon post.

DAY 6: 1800. Saturday. Came home and managed some more Patreon.

DAY 7: 2510. Spent the day getting all sorts of things done, but barely any time for writing; just Patreon again. Speaking of which: Patreon post is done! About winning NaNo and my journey there, of all things. Really wish I could get a little more Forest Castles in ;__; Hoping tomorrow I can do that as well as a little satirical piece I'm writing.

DAY 8: 3689. I returned to mortālēs and hit the end! It's all written! I may not know just how to attack editing it, but it's there, and that's what's important. Also managed to get my satirical piece in! No FC, though...

DAY 9: 2050. So thrilled to report I have returned to editing Forest Castles! This bit is like a difficult knot; it'll take me a while but will be very satisfying when I have it done. I've realized I spend a lot of time (30 minutes each way) on buses, so if I just take the first bus ride of the day to work on FC, I should in theory have no trouble hitting 15+ minutes of work on it a day. We shall see. Used this editing to begin cobbling together the next Patreon post (busy busy busy...) Hope to hit 50K by the 15th, though it looks like that'll be difficult.

DAY 10: 1881. Got some more FC editing done, then re-read/edited In Her Arms and did a little submissions research. It's a busy week, so I'm letting myself off the hook for not OAing today.

DAY 11: 2467. Some more light mortālēs editing, IIRC, and quite a bit of Forest Castles fun-- I watched Olympic-level sabre fencing and took some notes! I want to give Red, Avner, Eliza, and Ahava all their own distinct fencing styles.

DAY 12: 1151. How I wish I could've done more today. It was really just a bit of Forest Castles work and some waffling over other projects ;___; But, hey, Shabbat starts at 4:40 PM now. I'm going to have to kick myself into gear if I want to hit 50K by the 15th!

DAY 13: 2270. I think I managed a reasonable amount for Motzei Shabbat (post-Shabbat evening)! Posted this week's Patreon post and edited patterned seats, which I like but am worried nobody else will care about. The goal is 8K for tomorrow... we'll see if I hit it.

DAY 14: 8755. No, that is not a typo. I held an OHHOW stream (thanks to those who came!) and visited many more, and I wrote an unbelievable 8K+ words, from patterned seats to FC and finishing up with my Tell Me About The Nonbeliever outline.

DAY 15: 6695. I opened the day by writing out a new idea I've had recently (no title yet!) and later worked on an upcoming interview I have with beloved author Yah Yah Scholfield! I've just got to send the line edits back to them and we'll be releasing it ^__^ The bulk of my writing, though, was centered around my transition diary and the Nonbeliever outline from the other day. Finally, I spent a little time transferring some notes for FC into a Patreon post draft, so people can see how I've been developing that worldbuilding! No wonder I HIT 50K TODAY! Unimaginably thrilled.

DAY 16: 3402. I finished up that interview, worked a little more on the Patreon FC post, and edited more of my FC notes. I also streamed again today! Thanks so much to everyone who came ^_^ Nice to get back to normalcy.

DAY 17: 4611. A complicated bag of non-writing. Updated here, edited/submitted some flash fiction pieces, worked on my parallel post for Rebecca. Managed to work long enough to get a bit ahead on Shabbat this weekend!

DAY 18: 3523. Finished the parallels post and advertised a bit for the Blood & Breath zine overall (GET YOURSELF A COPY!) and began a short side story for Forest Castles.

DAY 19: 2402. Finished the side story at 1:00 AM. Help me! Then it was just a few more minutes of editing it left and right. I'm happy with the content; not so much with the syntax-- I'll have to take another look at it eventually. Did what I wanted to do, though, and great numbers for Friday! Shabbat started at 4:36 PM today.

DAY 20: 3200. Not thrilled about this number! Cleaned up some loose threads from the end of the week + worked on the TMATN outline, but wound up accidentally deleting the original parallel post and then funking up my 4tw word count and panicking over both. Took a lot out of me ;___; I hope to get more done tomorrow, so that I can get ahead on my 100K goal!

DAY 21: 4473. So happy! Not only did I hit a very high goal, but I also finished the TMATN outline! I'm sure it has some snags, but those are for later me to check out.

DAY 22: 3431. Today I hit 75K total! Of course, I am purposefully ahead about 1.8K of where I need to be to hit my goal of 100K, since I want to leave some wiggle room for Thanksgiving and Shabbat and Chanukah. Started working on the Hexagon outline just to move a bit further around the bingo board, and am quite enjoying it thus far.

DAY 23: 3188. Not ideal, but I got a bit done for Exhaustively and am attacking it in a new way.

DAY 24: 5538. Was accidentally moved to transsexual literary critique of an odd quote on writing, and decided to count it (since it'll go up somewhere eventually). Also did some Exhaustively work and got closer to finishing the mythical dialogue tags Patreon post.

DAY 25: 3901. Quite a bit of Exhaustively editing, and admittedly a lot of time spent fixing up my Twitch channel now that I have reached Affiliate status! Thanks so much for coming by ^__^

DAY 26. 2251. I broke 90K! Of course, I've purposefully kept ahead just for a day such as today; I knew I'd be writing less due to Shabbat. I'm very happy with what I did get done (mostly the Hexagon outline) and I hope to find some way to squash most of the rest of my bingo into tomorrow. We'll see how that goes... I was hit with some details of a new idea while on stream, so I might have to fight a few instincts.

DAY 27. 2900. I do wish I'd managed just 500 words more, but in fairness, the words came slowly-- I was working on a brand new short story for a weekly contest (couldn't be helped! plans to the wayside! inspiration takes no prisoners!) and I needed to think hard about it while writing. Broke some new research grounds and hit upon something quite nice and seasonal.

DAY 28. 4562. Finished Dressage-- that's the new short story that's shaking everything up. Edited some more Exhaustively, with my butt kicked into gear due to Max goose-books's birthday coming up in December-- I'll be binding it up into a paperback just for him!

DAY 29. 3354. Got some critique on and made some edits to Dressage. Edited Exhaustively right up until the end. Spent quite a bit of time cleaning up my Hexagon outline. HIT 100K!!!

DAY 29. 2721. Went over two problem bits in Exhaustively-- if Max signs off on them, the whole thing is finished (again)! Then switched to writing this month's Patreon Newsletter, since of course I wanted to reach the end of NaNo first. Happy NaNo! Updated bingo below, and an explanation below that.

Edit patterned seats: Done! It lacks spark, though; lacks that vital why did I write this?. I'll have to go to classic Bradbury sci-fi to see how he handled this issue.

Edit Exhaustively: Done! All that's left is to format it, put out an interest check, print a proof, etc.... This is a quite limited run, so I'm trying to relax a little ^__^

Write mortales: Done! I wrote all the way to the end, erotica and all. A writer I've shared some insecurities with wrote on the draft I handed them, you've embraced male nipples!

Write The Proposal: Begun! I've written approximately half of the draft. Another erotica, and one with a really cohesive plot; I quite like it. Hope to write more soon.

Submit Tragic Accident: Done! And several weeks to get a response, so all I have to do now is wait.

Submit YouTube Comment: Done! I got a rejection, and I'm glad I reached out. This is a really weird, niche piece, and I expect to get a hundred rejections before I find the exact right place.

Submit In Her Arms: Rethunk! This piece just isn't ready to go out. I love it, but I got a critique on it and just about nothing is working in there.

Outline Nonbeliever: Done! I'll go over it again sometime in the next few weeks to polish it up.

Outline Hexagon: Begun! Not remotely perfect, but making tons of progress on the plot.

Finish dialogue tags post: Begun! I hadn't touched this behemoth in months, and I added some words to it. I'll have to go back and re-read Your Father's Son (which I want to do anyway) and add in the relevant quotes from there... and then we'll be done!

FINAL WORDCOUNT: 103,574 words.

#Writing a new novel draft right now would be like actively struggling not to drown & using your last breath to ask for a glass of water.#txt #important writing updates #Got to go back thru DotA and handle all those tags as well... just keep things tidy in the writing spot.#And of course some bonus DotA content to post. Help help help.#Feel free to chat with me about these! I haven't spoken about all of them here.#wtwcommunity #Do you ever read a post and think yeah that guy's insane. Hope I give you that feeling every day.#(Because I think it about myself.)#nanowrimo #nanowrimo 2021 #nanorebels #nanoprep #Oh yes it's all split up into tiers. You've got editing writing submitting outlining blogging.

50 notes · View notes

red-life · 3 years

Text

i know this is late, but i just keep remembering the little menial things that make tumblr confusing and i want to post it for the new people

1. sideblogs

on tumblr, you can have one main blog, the first one made, and an unlimited amount of sideblogs. a lot of people save urls on sideblogs for future use or just to have. if you have to many unused ones tumbkr may shadowban you (ill get to that later) for it so be careful.

you can't send asks from a sideblog, at least from what i can tell. it isnt listed as a feature by tumblr either. you can't submit stuff either, all of it will be sent from your main url. same goes from following people and liking posts

you can add members to sideblogs but not main blogs. members can reblog stuff and edit parts of the blog. itll hide pms of the sideblog though, not delete them, so if you become the only member again, the logs will still be there

2. arbitrary limits

you can create up to ten sideblogs a day

you can only reblog 250 posts a day, spread across your main and sideblog, reseting at midnight EST. on mobile it won't tell you you hit reblog limit if you use quick reblog, so you might end up thinking you reblogged a bunch of stuff but it won't show up on your blog

only 150 of those posts can be photo posts

the queue can hold up to 300 posts, but can only post 50 a day

you can't save drafts if you hit post limit

you can send 10 asks an hour, with up to 5 of them being anonymous

you can only like 1000 posts a day

in tags, each one is up to 140 characters, and you can add up to 30 tags

when creating a post, only the first 5 tags will be indexed to the main tag page, the others are searchable but its best to hold off on comments until after the first

some features are only editable or more accessible on mobile or desktop, like turning on asks and anon

3. shadowbans

while if you break the rules and get your account suspended tumblr will send you an email telling you that, the only way to tell if youve been shadowbanned is by looking for the signs

you cant pm people

your posts dont show up in tags

your url doesnt show up when you search it (different than if the function that makes it unsearchable is enabled)

your posts can only be seen on the dashboard by your followers

you cant send asks

people cant see notifications of when you like or reblog things from then, and it cant be seen in the notes

you cant be @'d by people

i mightve missed some stuff since i dont have much experience with shadowbans , but if it happens to you message tumblr support for help

feel free to add on

#*tumblr intensifies*#mcytblr #snowflake.original

136 notes · View notes

gangplanksorenji · 2 years

Text

4/12

*choo choo* Hello Orenjideul! Raf here! Bwoah, how time really does fly so fast, eh? Well, it had been 4 months since I had created this blog and started to release my works! Well, here's a quick recap on what happened in my little journey last month or even the course of my blog itself! poof

---

My Top 3 Works (As of June 1, 2022, 8:00 PM GMT+8):

3. Won't Let Go

Released in Mar. 30, 2022, 1:55 PM GMT+8 - 153 Notes

2. Stay

Released in Apr. 4, 2022, 9:58 PM GMT+8 - 172 Notes

1. Better

Released in May. 4, 2022, 11:10 PM GMT+8 - 217 Notes

---

My Achievements and Updates (As of June 1, 2022, 8:00 PM GMT+8):

Four sucessful fic releases in the month of May!

A single angst released! (It's been a while since I released one)

Better is my first and only fic that reached 200 notes and thank you all for that!

Also, Better reached 100 notes in less than 8 hours! A great achievement since I'm really proud on how floofi am I with Chuu when writing it.

478 followers and counting!

277 posts

---

Possible Releases and my Drafts:

Other group fics (angsts and fluffs)?

Pace (Race 4-6) (I promise! I lack a bit of juice to finish these, aha sweats)

Around You Mini Series (Part 3) (this is gonna be a special one, I guess...)

---

Another Update!

Drafts are such a pain but I'll try my best to finish and edit them if I can i manifest writeo juice juseyo~. Also, I'm sadge about Jiyoon's department but let's just hope for the best for her future plans and manifesting for her speedy recovery. Also, thank you all for all the support you gave me in the past 4 months, couldn't do it without y'all so a big thanks!!!! <3

---

sending our best girl jiyoon! just hoping for the best for her!

-🍊

#4 months of my blog!#achievements #thank you!

8 notes · View notes

blysse-and-blunder · 3 years

Text

in lieu of a commonplace book

10:30 pm, sunday, nov 14, 2021

what's up gamers, it's been approx. two thousand years (actually a month) but i am alive, i am consuming media, and i am going to tell you about it under the cut. this is a long one!

reading please believe me when i say i had written out an extremely good and thoughtful take on mxtx's novel tiān guān cì fú (heaven official's blessing), specifically for you, @viciousmerlin, and that because i am somehow still very bad at this, i managed to delete the whole thing. very frustrating! anyway, loved it, took forever to finish it, the last quarter or so draaaagged which i do blame in part on the fact that it was being released serially at that part (and also that the slow burn had...slow burnt up to such a pitch by the cave of 1000 gods that any flashback or sideplot at that point was torturous); i know there was a whole secondary arc with some new characters and shit introduced but i have absolutely no memory of it apart from ruoye's incredibly sad backstory; still, we stan a plot that manages to introduce a rigid and completely impenetrable heavenly hierarchy and then deconstructs it, and there is at least one unwritten essay in me about face covering in this (masks! bandages! facial expressions that are or are not sincere! kisses?) and also probably ascent / descent/ leaping /falling/ flying/ leaps of faith and or love? we love to invert a rigid value system, xie lian actually is as worldly-wise and damaged as you think and it only made him kind but then, also, i did contract serious hua cheng brain rot after the whole 'teach him to roll dice properly' thing and it has yet to let up. the way xl just! starts trusting him with literally no reason and is never proven wrong! is very good to me, personally!

in my earlier draft of this post i listed a bunch of the things i was reading around the margins of trying to finish tgcf, and i will recreate it at a later date, but consider: i am tired.

watching finally gave the anya taylor joy emma a fair trial, having more or less forgiven it for not being the romola garai + johnny lee miller mini series. i will give atj this, she does a better job than i feared from all the promo material (wherein she only had a single facial expression-- in the film she has several!), but the best part of this film was a) the soundtrack b) bill fucking nighy c) miranda? the older i get, the more i feel for miss bates. i fucking loved elton and mrs. elton, they were absurd, i loved it. i knew i liked johnny flynn as a folk singer already, and thought he actually did a passable job as knightley, but they did him a disservice with the hair/sideburns combo, it covered most of his face and left his pouty lips as a weird focal point, which was distracting. there's an unwritten essay in me about the decision to associate certain scenes/classes with italianate / classical music, and others with trad music / raucous folk harmonies, without then having any real time spent around the classes who are implicated in those harmonies, but consider: i am tired.

also started watching succession and this Sure is a Show, but four episodes into s1 and i can usually pull the correct name for the correct roy- male and just want to watch sarah snook work. tom and greg are Way Too Much already but they are, individually and together, the kind of traffic accident you can't look away from. actually, i could apply that to roman too. the recny ball just happened, to give everyone context.

listening i've had the newest album by autoheart on infinite loop almost since it dropped a few weeks ago-- initially it wasn't doing a lot for me, not being punch (2013), but as i have listened more to the album as a whole, stuff has clicked. there are more bleeps and bloops, synths and bass lines, it almost hits an abba-esque place every once in a while, which of course means it slaps, and the lyricism and unexpected melodiousness (?) is all still there. the single i know that he loves me captures this pretty well:

youtube

(the religious trauma/gay devotion is certainly a big part of the video but also, if the 'he' in the lyrics is a certain ghost king who is there and gone but unquestioningly devoted, this becomes a hualian anthem and on this hill i will plant my flag) and that led me to consider the album more carefully. other stand-out tracks right now are:

into the woods (slow and easy tempo, shimmering sort of up-beat texture, the lyrics are Good but also Very Real, there's a repetition of 'i feel fine, i feel fine' which is a useful mantra lately)

perestroika (instrumental! incredible! cinematic! makes me feel like i'm standing on top of a mountain in a sunrise!)

time machine (the chorus is a good-sad that i don't necessarily relate to but don't not relate to, I forgive, you forget me, that's just how it has to be)

already gone (melodic! melancholy! i love the focus on little things about someone, the way the music itself builds. either a wangxian anthem or a hualian anthem depending on the hour, ugh the devotion is very much)

playing nothing really-- dnd resumes tomorrow!

making i need to...mend things and also put the garden/yard to bed for the winter and neither of those things is happening. i got halfway into the prep for a cooking project yesterday and just...put it on hold...when will my hands-on-project ability return from war...

working on spent much of the last month stressing about, and the majority of the last week actually drafting, the diss proposal which will ideally govern what i spend the next 2-5 years (please god more on the 2 side) of my life working on. so that's...a thing... i have also got a shitload of grading to still finalize, i did a first pass of my thoughts and then got so demoralized i had to fart around reading ridiculous fanfic for like 36-48 hours to recover. my eyeballs feel a bit scalded now but what can you do, just write in the comments section of an essay 'this is poorly written and it made me sad to read'?

#in lieu of a commonplace book #ilcb #wow i missed this it actually took very little time to write once i sat down and did it

17 notes · View notes

supportivespaceforsurvivors · 3 years

Text

An explanation of recent events

Hi all. I am posting a timeline of the recent events that have ended up with me inviting some of the mods I trust from @advicetotraumasurvivors to this blog. It is incomplete; as of this posting (4pm CST, August 23, 2021), nobody has admitted any wrongdoing, but I know a lot of you aren't really sure what happened at all. I apologize in advance for the verb tense shift midway through. I unfortunately don't have the spoons to edit it.

Hayden does not plan to stay with the blog. Olive plans to stay at least for now. I will likely stay. I'm not sure about Henrie or Berry at the moment. Those are the only mods that currently have access to this blog. (Edit from Mod Henrie: I’ll be staying.)

The timeline will be under the cut as it is fairly long. All times are in Central Standard Time.

Around 5:30pm CST last night, April messaged the Discord telling us she was leaving the blog. She left both the Discord and the blog shortly thereafter. We got some anons asking about why she'd left and I directed those towards her @traumasurvivors blog because I didn't feel comfortable trying to speak for her, One of them felt my answers was dismissive. That anon ended up being a mod in the Discord who was triggered by my tone. We received more asks from them, one passive-aggressive and one outright guilt-trippy.

At 7:30pm CST Henrie made an announcement that everyone who participates in the blog is a volunteer. Several mods offered in the Discord to mediate since the mod who was upset didn't feel comfortable addressing the issue with me directly.

Around 9:00pm CST we started getting some positive messages to the blog. I started to think maybe the situation had blown over. I tried to answer one of the positive anons. Tumblr gave me an error code.

We discovered the upset mod had deleted all of our inbox messages.

At 9:30pm CST Berry noticed posts were disappearing from our blog. I had noticed some weren't showing up for me, but because Tumblr is a Hellsite I figured they were there and it was just a glitch. Even the pinned post got deleted.

I panicked and asked what if the Carrd got deleted. Unfortunately, whoever the mod was, saw that and changed the email and password to the Carrd.

At 9:36pm I started adding Henrie, Hayden, Berry, and Olive to this side blog. This ended up taking several hours because we were all disoriented and triggered pretty badly by then.

At 9:45 pm I noticed they deleted my mod tag. We kept trying to encourage them to stop. Henrie reblogged all the asks that were still there to their personal in case they got deleted.

At 9:55pm I left the server and asked Berry to invite me to the new one they said they'd make so the handful of us could discuss the situation while feeling a bit more safe. There's a gap of about 20 minutes in the timeline here but I'm not sure anything super important happened during it.

Olive rescues most of the info from the Carrd by 10:21pm. April offers to transcribe the pinned post that I managed to screenshot on my phone.

Hayden makes a post around this time saying we've moved URLs. The upset mod deletes it.

I ask April if she will write down the URLs of all of our followers on advicetotraumasurvivors and send asks to them one by one to let them know what's going on. An extremely inefficient method, but at this point I'm at a loss. Henrie starts sending the asks to our followers. April finishes transcribing the pinned post at about 10:30.

At this point I have taken my sleep med and am losing reading comprehension rapidly. I say I'm going to bed but end up not sleeping until something like 4am.

At 10:31 Olive discovers that the upset mod has password-protected the blog. Henrie copy pastes the only ask in the inbox. It came in after the others were deleted.

At 11pm Olive announces she has a download/export of the blog in progress to hopefully preserve some of the posts and information on it. I ask April to boost the new URL. Henrie asks Tumblr's customer service system about uploading the file to the new blog.

At 11:10 Berry notices the queue is being messed with. Several mods go back and forth with the saboteur mod changing how often the queue posts. I suggest that we reblog ask games to the new blog so people can get to know us better once this all dies down.

At 11:21 Hayden announces the blog title has been changed to DON'T TALK TO US. A few minutes later Olive says some extremely tasteless tags are being added to queued posts, including the r slur and the n word. We won't go to any more detail about any of the other things that were said because they were extremely triggering, but we are deeply sorry to any followers (and mods) that may have seen those tags.

11: 38pm: Henrie makes posts on both blogs saying it's not us typing these awful things and to block advicetotraumasurvivors.

11:40pm: We decide to delete all the posts on the blog and the whole queue. April starts mass deleting.

11:53pm: I screenshot all the asks in the drafts. We delete all the drafts. The upset mod continues to change the blog title to triggering and inflammatory things.

1am today (Monday): Henrie asks if it's okay to announce to the original server that we moved discords and blogs. I ask if we can avoid adding people to the new discord until we know who the mod is that's upset. We eventually agree to hold off on adding people into the new discord.

2:44am: April gets an anon apologizing for their poor/inflammatory actions on her traumasurvivors blog and posts a response separate from the ask. We wait, hoping that the anon will message April.

3am: We get a similar apology on the new blog. It gets screenshotted and sent the new Discord so everyone can see it. I delete the ask from the inbox with everyone's permission because it feels very guilt trippy to me.

3:23 April gets more anons blaming her for the situation spiraling out of control, presumably from the upset mod.

12:22pm: April has more anons when we all wake up. All of us in the new server agree that we're tired and just want the situation resolved. No one comes forward.

Edit from mod Henrie: This is a timeline of all of the “major events”, but it doesn’t convey how frantic we all were. We were all feverishly working on deleting triggering tags/deleting posts/trying to find out who was doing this/etc. in between each of these times. It was chaotic and messy and incredibly exhausting for everyone involved.

#ssfs.txt

24 notes · View notes

crownlessam · 4 years

Text

@cvrsedseraph @milfdean @swansongmp3 thank you meg for tagging me tn this has been sitting in my drafts since last week so sorry to you guys fjakjffjkshd

1. name/nickname: alex

2. gender: [static noises]

3. star sign: pisces

4. height: 5’2”. ahahah why are u so small @ myself

5. time: 11:39 pm

6. birthday: march 12th

7. favorite bands/groups: yghhghfj i have been listening to too many solo artists lately. but just know there are some out there i like

8. favorite solo artists: mitski, frank ocean, phoebe bridgers, lorde, lady gaga, can you tell i’m depressed and also an el gee bee tee

9. song stuck in my head: potential breakup song (explicit) by aly and aj

10. last movie: when harry met sally

11. last show: hxh. bc cringe culture truly is dead

12. when did i create this blog: well the url used to be my main and i’ve been on here since like. 2011/2012ish????? but i resurrected it this year post november 5th

13. what do i post: only spn nonsense on this blog

14. last thing googled: my college account login to view my tuition (derogatory)

15. other blogs: my main @scoundrelhan

16. do i get asks: lich rally none. but that might be a good thing jakhdlahf

17. why i chose my url: boy king sam <3

18. following: apparently 400. but a lot of them are inactive so that’s prob gonna drop real quick

19. followers: my sexy secret ;)

20. average hours of sleep: idk probably around 6 or 7 i wake up like every hour usually it’s so bad

21. lucky number: idk i think i said in a previous tag thing it used to be 13 when i was in middle school bc i thought i was Edgy. now none

22. instruments: cello mainly. but also viola and euphonium/baritone

23. what am i wearing: sweatpants and a t-shirt

24. dream job: trophy spouse LMAO. i don’t have one <3

25. dream trip: always wanted to do the west coast/pacific northwest again.

26. favorite food: anything with cheese

27. nationality: american

28. favorite song: i have many. but right now good days by sza

29. last book read: the color of law by richard rothstein

30. top 3 fictional universes i’d like to live in: none honestly bc i’d die in all of them <3 but supernatural just so i could cause chaos

any cherished mutuals (which means all mutuals) do this if you haven’t already and would like to!!!

#personal #ask game

5 notes · View notes

intheseautumnhands · 4 years

Photo

30,724 words at the stroke of midnight, December 1st!

11 days of writing, three WIPs continued, one of those WIPs plotted in full, started four more, one at the very last minute (by which I mean like 10:30 PM on Nov 30th), and ten short pieces in five fandoms.

I didn’t win, but you know what? I did good.

Also I learned I can write 1k in about 20 minutes if I’m motivated enough. So that’s kind of cool.

Writing plans for December at the moment:

Getting on the fandom stocking type events on Dreamwidth and filling some requests

Possibly trying to keep up with the Harcest prompt event going on? Since that’s still devouring my damn brain.

Taking a good look at some of the short pieces and deciding about how/if to fix them and put them on AO3. (And not letting the two of them that want to become longer fic become longer fic, goddammit.) Possibly seeing if I can get someone else to take a look too.

Taking a good look at the completed draft of the first Night Vale Allison story, deciding if I can fix it up and post it.

Also maybe going through what’s written up so far for the Diego/Vanya fic and the Ben timetravel fic. They’re the two I am most determined to get finished and posted, and I feel like they both need reigning in from the wreckage of NaNo.

(the Luther/Vanya fic and the Sigyn fic are the next tier of determination, but I’m still trying to work out if ‘clean up then continue’ or ‘just try to continue freestyling it and edit it all later’ are gonna work better, so, hmm.)

Also hitting up Chocolate Box noms when they go up.

but also, now that I’m done with NaNo, I picked up a couple games I really want to play that were on heavy discount and would like to dive into one of them, I want to get back to knitting and possibly playing with calligraphy-style things, and also once we finish the cleanup and get past the inspection on the 8th, I’m going to see about planning for the CYOA thing. Also, Solstice! So I probably won’t write quite as much this month, but that’s okay by me.

#nanowrimo: here we go again

2 notes · View notes

diregate · 5 years

Text

Tarot Reading Commissions now up

So after much thought and even much much more hesitation (and a lot of positive motivation by a lot of people), I’ve decided to open up tarot reading commissions. This will serve as a way to keep myself stable, both mentally and financially, as I am staying by myself while studying in university. The amount I get from doing this will tend towards alleviating costs of living (this place doesn’t come with a kitchen, so most of my foods are instant foods/takeouts) and purchasing of study materials if the need arises.

Stuffing everything below the read-more, because this post is getting long.

Disclaimers on tarot reading: I do not read minds or the future, the cards do not read minds or the future.

I personally have no experience in doing fortune spreads e.g. Twelvesmoon spread (or any equivalent that involves ‘how will this month of the year look like’, that’s for horoscopes). If you really want to, I won’t say no, but just take it with a huge grain of salt, since even I don’t really trust those.

There are possibilities when my reads are completely off, and if I am, I apologize. I cannot agree on refunds, but I will however leave the commissioner to decide to pay before or after a reading session.

What can I do for you?

I have two versions of reads to offer to people who are interested: Simple and Complex spreads.

The simple spreads are, well, simple. They are fast, elegant and great if you want to skip out on the unnecessary clutter that comes with reading tarots. The simple spreads I offer usually use only 2-4 cards. If we are reading real-time (I’ll come to this point later), it may take about 5-10 minutes from shuffling.

For simple spreads, you ask me what you are looking for. If you have a particular spread you would like to choose for me to use, let me know as well. These questions can be specific or vague, but being more specific helps in the reading, and deciding the spread to use.

The complex spreads are a little different. In real-time reading, this can take minimally 30 minutes for me to finish reading it all out to you. The spread takes at least 5 cards (as of now, I do not have spreads that exceed 9 cards). If you want your best buck for bite, have been puzzling between several problems, or just really like to see how people read tarots, I recommend this way. I’ve done a decent number of these reads for others.

With these kinds of spreads, I ask you a few short questions, that you can answer with a few words. The first question will always be somewhere along the lines of “Are your problems rooted in the past, or are you more worried of the future consequences?”, and subsequent questions will be adjusted from there. I try my best not to use default lines, so that everyone’s experience can be unique.

How can I do reads for you?

I will offer my Discord to people who are buying a read. Alternatively, Tumblr messenger is also a way to reach for me whether you want to have me post the read there, or if you would like to find me for other reasons. Email is fine too, but only through requests. There are two main methods to how we can arrange this, depending if timezone permits.

Real-time Read: This will be tricky, but more often than not I prefer this style of reading. I say this is tricky because I live in GMT+8 timezone with full time undergraduate studies. (My) Weekends are also off limits for this style of commissions in general due to personal reasons. For a rough gauge, midnight PDT = 3 PM GMT+8.

All reads in this format can be done over iM, and while I do support voice, I have a preference not to as my place can get noisy and disruptive.

Post-read Draft: Easier to handle, especially if time does not permit an arrangement between us. I do the read request, then give you a full script of what I’ve read, through iM or a PDF document sent through email. Most simple spreads can fall under this category, as it’s a much lower density of words and makes for an easy ‘morning coffee’, so to say.

For both, clarifying on certain meanings can be done, just ask me about it.

What are the costs of the commission?

Simple spreads cost 5 USD, while complex spreads cost 15 USD. Prices can be negotiated if needed.

Real-time reads and post-read drafts do not affect prices. Nor do the decks I use. Clarification of reads do not cost anything as well.

Payment can be done before or after the reading session. Tips are also welcome. Most payments would be done through Paypal.

What cards do I use?

For those interested, I use the Lost Tarot of Nostradamus deck, and the Steampunk deck. I am also currently learning on using the Tyrian Tarot deck as a support deck. As such, most of my spreads come from these three, though I also experiment and invent custom-tailored spreads for some more specific requests.

I’m unfortunately not putting links in, in case the post disappears because of Tumblr algorithms, but they should come up easily in searches.

For those who are interested, I implore you to ask; for those who would like to commission me, I thank you for it; for those who are taking a passing glance, I’d enjoy if you spread the word.

#tarot comms

18 notes · View notes

queencryo · 6 years

Text

Journal 3

now with readmore

Journal 3

So! After typing up the last blog post, it was like… 6 am, or some shit like that. And so I finally went to sleep, very very very tired.

Silly and I had planned for me to have the buffalo chicken dip ready before she got home form work, but I… fucked that up, and slept until like 630 pm. She didn’t seem to be upset by it, but I kind of was so. Anyway!

I started on the dip, and she came home, I welcomed her (I love welcoming her home. It makes me look forward to being here long-term). Dip didn’t get started in the crockpot until like 730, 8 (I had to heat freezer chicken so it was cuttable and not frozen, I used the stove) (normally I use regular raw chicken, but I got nervous while shopping with silly’s mom so I like. Just got freezer chicken.) It turned out pretty well actually! The freezer chicken tasted very good on its own, and I’m just now realizing that after a couple days in the fridge the chicken starts breaking down in the dip anyway (I didn’t realize this until silly pointed it out, cuz I’m a [not stupid, but I don’t pay very much attention to things around me])

On that note, me and silly have started, like. Trying to be mean to ourselves less. It started cuz she. Is very mean to herself, but I then realized I still am too, so we’re! trying to do that less. It’s neat I guess. I like it. Kindness is good.

Don’t remember what was eaten for dinner that night. Something? Went upstairs to watch something while the dip cooked.

The dip was good! Silly says it was good, and that makes me very very happy. I added like. A good amount of buffalo sauce after it was done cooking, cuz it still needed some more kick. Ya know? Some kick? (I’m typing this on my laptop so I’m like. Kind of zoning out while I’m typing it. Dw about it)

Around then I realized that silly might have problems eating that as a meal bc chips are carbs are sugar, so… bleh. Still, *I’ll* eat it as meals, nyeh. I think I’ll ocntinue using raw chicken for the dip at home, it’s nice to have the leftovers from it to put into spaghetti. Chicken spaghetti.

That night I resolved to just not sleep and stay up and eat breakfast with silly before she went to work, because that seemed very fun and nice ya know? Watched a lot of adventure time, I think I’m up to like. Season 5 now (the long one)

But… around an hour before she was scheduled to wake p I was like “oh well I mean it’ll be fine if I just… sleep for an hour and wake up with her…”

Long story short I slept until about 530 pm, and was startled to wake to an empty bed. Apparently I sleepily said I loved her before she left, though, so I guess that’s not a total loss.

So! Later that night, silly comes home all excited, and like. “Hey we should buy an xbox one”

And you know I am nothing if not someone who is willing to make very expensive decisions for like no reason. So long story short we go to gamestop, and make a delightful purchase of Halo: master chief collection, two controllers, Mass Effect: Andromeda, and NO t-shirts that say gamer girl >>>:(

Ate a place in town that is apparently The Local Wing Place. I got. Mild wings, which honestly were barely even hot. I guess I shoulda heeded the menu bit that said the mild was mostly butter. A fool am I. The fried pickles were spears not slices so they were like! Still good, EXTREMELY hot but still good.

Came home, set up the xbox. Halo requires downloading of all the games (because of course). It’s like. 70 GB, but we reduce this by setting Halo 3 to higher priority and disabling Halo 4.

Playing 3 with silly was very fun. She’s way way better at it than me, mostly bc she is smart and stays back whereas I, dumbo raised on normal difficulty that I am, rush in and die quickly in heroic.

She spent like. An hour and a half or something updating her old xbox account. Her new xbox avatar looks way better, and is extremely cool (like her). She says it feels really nice updating all of that to her new self. I can understand the feeling: ridding the wolrd of another footprint of a you that’s a lie is. Very nice, I think.

So we played more halo! No highlights, I think, but it was really nice. And fun. I’m a girl and I’m gay now and I love jesus, but I still love halo C:

I ALSO brought fable 2 along, and played it while silly slept. Gotdamn I fucking love fable 2. Silly says I’m cute when I’m really excited about something. I was REALLY excited about fable 2. I think this is the first time I’ve ever done a run that’s (hopefully) gonna be mostly strength, and possibly I’m gonna use a hammer, where before I always ALWAYS used a katana. But. I just unlocked third level shock (oo) and a very pretty steel cleaver (ooo), so… ….. hopin’ I’ll be a good bastard.

Next day. Went with silly to work, as it was Friday and Time For The Magic Commander (Commeownder, in the local parlance). I only played commander a little bit, though, before silly called me over “hey do you wanna join the draft so that there are 5 rounds and everyone suffers” (my words not hers), and of course yes, that sounds so fun.

So! What draft is is each table (of I think eight people?) opens a pack of cards for each person there. You pick out the card you want from that pack, and pass it on to the next person. Then pick a card from the new pack, then the next, then so on and on. It was very fun, and I fell kinda quickly into running a Golgari (green and black) deck, which went well for me I think? (Also I just. Like golgari. They’re cool, and not annoying like blue). I had a lot of undergrowth effects, which depended on how many creatures I had in my graveyard. MEANING, that I had a lot of creatures in my deck, and enough land to keep them flowing. So, at one point, I had a, I think, 13/13 or 16/16 (idr) Rhizome lurker (gains +1/1 for each creature in graveyard), so that was… cool? Neat?

I won my first match of the draft, largely due to my opponent offering me a lot of tips cuz I was new (the boyfriend (boyfriend, right? They’re not married?) of the person silly had an encounter with a couple months ago. I think that was before we were dating. But that guy was my first opponent, and it went well?) largely due to his help, I won te first game of the match, then the second game timed out.

Second match was against F, who everyone silly knows apparently has a crush on (I also have a crush on them (they/them)), they were very very sweet and I enjoyed my game with them a lot even though they kicked the love of god out of my ass. But they also like. Told jokes during it, so whatevs. (turns out a deck of flyers will kick a goglari deck with no reach/flying in the ass.) they also helped me edit my deck, so that was very very kind of them, and I very much appreciate it.

Uh… other highlights… uh, I played silly’s ex (they dated for like. I think a month? But still. He’s not nearly as big as silly described him), and apparently hurt his feelings because I am a. very very mean and abrasive person if you take the things I say seriously. I. feel bad about that. And I spent the rest of the night noting to please not take the things I said seriously. I ended the night with 1 win, 1 draw, 3 losses, but that’s? very very much better than I expected, tbh. I guess using a deck I actually had a hand in the creation of helps a lottttt. So that’s cool! Silly said my deck was good, but that as after F edited it, so idk if it counts?

Silly says she’s glad I actually enjoy magic and I’m not just humoring her. I do very much enjoy it! I don’t think I want to get to the level she is at (due to cost, if nothing else), it at the very least will be added to my long list of “things I have or had an interest in, that I have a dabbling or casual knowledge of that is beyond the average person by a degree ranging from slight to significant, but still pales in comparison to the knowledge of an actual practitioner”. … this list is much much longer than the list of things I actually know things about. ;;

Spent like 30 minutes after the draft talking with silly and two regulars. I was annoying and unkind, and felt very unhappy with myself following. I also had to actually leave the store after it closed, since that’s like. The Rules. Silence and isolation (waiting in the car) are not conducive to recovery from self hatred, so that festered a little bit. I was fine eventually, though. Uh… yeah! Had to make a mark in my calendar.

Tried to stay up and play fable, but ended up falling asleep like 10 minutes after silly (I am a fucking scourge and I fail regularly to sleep at the same time as her. I am a Night Bitch)

Oh, also I was unmedicated for the entirety of the draft night, so that’de, like… that’s why I was so fucking annoying all day. That just kinda happens when I’m off it long enough, I guess.

I don’t remember more from that night, so let’s move on.

Got up w silly the next day, ate cereal, went up to the store. Woo!

Sat down with silly’s ex, some other dude. Started reading the book gf gave me about Learning Magic Good And Shit, it was actually real neat and cool! Apparently that’s what he wanted for Christmas, so it was. Slightly awkward!

I read that for a while, then joined in on a magic game. Players: one of the regulars talked to last night before closing, some girl I’d never seen called E (who was very sweet, I now love her), and some dude I don’t remember at all.

We had two games, I only remember that in the second one I ran Estrid The Masked as commander, and that was a. Long Fucking Game. Partially because I had like 11 enchantments on the board at one point, and kept using Estrid and Oath Of Terezi (planeswalkers do TWO things on a turn). Uh…

Highlights:

I had “every time someone casts a spell, make them pay an extra mana or else you can draw another card”, which I then doubled with Estrid’s invocation (at least until I had too many cards to know what to do with, so I put some enchantments in the graveyard before I ulted with estrid) I ulted Estrid like 2-3 times, lmao At one point between ults, I had “all enchantments are creatures” on the field, and then E played “destroy all creatures that aren’t pirates”, so I. lost. Uh. All my motherfucking creatures, except Estrid (not a creature), and a God (had a mask). And ALL my fucking enchantments. WARB- anyway next turn I ulted estrid again and got them all back. Lmfao. at the end of the game it cost about 14 mana / creature to attack me, it was AMAZING, the guy who made fucktons of tokens couldn’t TOUCH me so anyway. I used sacred mesa, plus like 48 mana (untapping all my enchanted lands is GREAT) to create 24 pegasi, which then became 24 4/4 flying angels (Divine Visitation), which was GREAT holy DAMN

I lost in the end, got milled by regular dude for like. 55 cards in one turn.

I coulda prevented this by exiling the creatures he used to mill me, but I just… didn’t. Ever. :C because I’m a foollllllll I also could’ve prevented this by swinging angels at him at the same time I killed the other player (E left before then, I guess she had work or something), but I just. Didn’t do that, because I was scared something would happen to them? It was an eminently foolish thing to not do, especially since I could make So Fucking Many angels. Always. Jesus I could make so many angels.

Meanwhile, silly was moving a shitton of boxes for the Big Fuckhuge Sale the next day. I felt bad that I couldn’t help, but I couldn’t bc if I got injured I could sue. Fair, I guess, but doesn’t make it easier to just sit on the sidelines. At least I brought ibuprofen from home.

Said quick goodbye to regulars who were chill, and who I played my first couple of games with.

Silly got told to just. Go home when her shift ended yesterday, which was upsetting bc she’d been looking forward to playing magic like. The whole day. Not quite the same, but we did play a few games when we got home. So that was nice C:

I ate dip for dinner, silly ate chicken buffalo. She is so. SO bad at eating all the meat on the bones. She says it’s cuz gristle is gross, but like .it’s. it’s MEAT. Eat the meat. So I ate all the gristle off the end of her wings while she said I was disgusting.

We finished halo 3 last night. I felt like. Stupid and bad because I was bein a failure at it, but god that was like. Soooo stupid. Lmfao. I shouldn’t have done that!

I finally managed to log in to my Microsoft account. Apparently my fucking username was staffgripper36, and I have no goddamned clue why that is my username for that.

But I made an avatar and she’s like. Cool af and she has a sundress so I guess I can’t really complain too much, can I?

We also started ODST! It is Neat, and I really like it thus far. I can’t remember ever seeing that intro cutscene in my life, but I guess that’s cuz I was an impatient 12 year old at the time, lmfao.

Then I played fable 2 til 7 am while silly slept. I. Don’t know why I fucking did that. I did get married, though. To marion the bookshop owner. We live in the corner house of the bowerstone market, just like the one playthrough of fable wherein I remember the name of my wife to this day (Hannah the Traveller) That house is my Home, you got me?

Finally onto today! 2520 words in. If words were feet, this journal entry would be a half-mile.

Alright… it has now been more than a full week since I started this journal entry. I’m back in Texas, and I… feel bad for that. I fear how much has been lost.

So! Next morning, I get up with silly and we go to The Work Place. The Big Fucking Sale is going on. I still wished I could help more, but unfortunately that is… not a possibility…

Wandered around the store for a while. Picked up: 4000 AD, a very old-looking game that seems neat. Mostly bought it cuz it looked old and aged as shit founders of gloomhaven, a game I got cuz it reminded me of marielda Anime Chess, that’s not the real name but silly said she’d been thinking about buying it for like. A While, so I bought it because I hate her an AD&D character sheets book, that still had some old character sheets in it (fuckin score) some VERY old vampire the masquerade stuff, including what I’m guessing is probably the first book that offered playing a hunter rather than a vampire? Also the sourcebook as of like 1992. More is the same than is different, though I guess that’s also cuz I barely know modern world of darkness

Sat around and read the hunter book for like. Basically a couple hours or something? Idk. Talked a little bit with some of the regulars, T and her boyfriend.

Eventually, left and went to the ice cream store across the street, ate Goat Cheese Ice Cream Oh Boy, and started writing this journal.

I wrote school’s motto on the chalkboard there, and later heard someone say “I… don’t know what that means. Should I know what that means?

Was surprised by the entrance of Silly. Goodness me I love her so much.

We then went home and like. Chilled.

She made alfredo/lentil pasta (so she doesn’t die from carbs) and fish. I, meanwhile, attempted to make raspberry cheesecake.

I got kinda stressed by the cheesecake process, cuz I was trying to multitask but still didn’t feel like I was going fast enough. I started doing that dumb anxiety over-done stuff thing that I do sometimes.

I then proceeded to open a very-fizzed dr pepper and just kinda. Break down a lil bit. I managed to keep it together until I had the cheesecake done, at least, I’m kinda proud of myself for that!

But yeah. Then I started crying or something, I don’t fully remember. I remember I accidentally made silly cry because I am an idiot, and also I was feeling bad because I felt helpless and pathetic, and typical consolation doesn’t really help with that. I’m sorry for that, darlin.

Anyway. She’s a really good fucking cook, like she’s better than my mom and dad both. Like not to be the kinda person who overpraises ther significant, but :eyes: !!! who knew that adding spices and not cooking from a box improved things??? @mom

I don’t really remember the rest of the night, nothing interesting I suppose. We probably played halo odst or something, and cuddled.

The cheesecake was… not to my taste, personally. Silly claims to kinda like it, but personally it fell into the “this isn’t really that good at all, why do I keep wantng to eat it”, probably my favorite part was the pre-baked crust.

Yeah! Stuf like that.

We got up the next morning. Busy day!!! The next 3 days, silly had em off and we were gonna make this day fuckin WORK for us

So we went to like. The nearby game store

There was a cat! And also I bought some magic card boosters. No news. Why the fuck was there a shitton of pathfinder corebooks on the Shelf O’ Unloved Games. Rude.

Had a fun conversation at a pet store

The game store near where silly worked had some things. She got halo 5, meaning she had The Complete Collection, not that it matters cuz everything after reach sucks. But anyway. She also got an application for there! So that’s really good, yay! Woo!

The nearby hobby shop was very neat, it had a shitton of gundam stuff, and like. Model trains! Wow! Apparently model rockets don’t fuckin come with the engine or anything.g that seems a little silly to me. Also they had some 3-d printing stations, but they’re apparently out for now. Idk whassup there.

Got some jingle bells at the nearby craft store, or whatever. Ran into a coworker of silly’s. she revealed that she almost named herself Katherine, and would’ve shortened it to Cat, meaning we fucking skated THIS close to me just absolutely refusing to talk to her in that alternate timeline.

Ate at dairy queen bc I had a gift card

THRIFT STORES

I made some very VERY nice discoveries. Oh HO, how delightful… some nice mugs, that I decided not to get on account of I was already transporting 3 of the things back home. But uhhh…. I got some cute skirts I think, basically just some bottoms, from the first store. Learned that my feet are not made for thrift store women’s heels. Sob.

Thrift shop two I found some very VERY nice things, including BASEBALL MOM SHIRT, and also a shirt for a basketball team for the immaculate conception high school, or some shit. I’m so excited to reveal that one. Also some things that were actually women’s tops, that might actually fit me or some shit (spoiler, they will not once I retry them on) (lol)

I uh… THINK after that we went home? And made tacos!!!!!! Holy shit silly makes such good fucking tacos oh my god. Like. I used to hate taco night at home, cuz that meant like. Dry hamburger meat with Taco Seasoning from HEB, in a hard taco shell.

But. I have discovered the truth of mixing a bit of salsa, corn, and beans into the meat, and getting it all moist, and also applying sour cream to the tacos. God they were so good holy fuck. Holy fuck. What a goddess.

We then proceeded to, I think, finish halo odst. What absolute heroines we are. I think we also watched all of otgw. I gushed about, like. The painfully o bvious metaphors and stuff that I knew about, and silly thought I was dumb I’m sure. But she did cry at the end, bc it’s very good and also because I was crying.

Stayed up later than silly did. Cried a little bit before I went to sleep because I. love her so much. Dear fuck I love her.

Ate breakfast the next morning. Returned from showering to find that silly was shooting me with a nerf gun. The fucker. We had a nerf gun fight and I’m PRETTY sure I got the better of her, because I’m very good and also extremely cool. :3 side note but she’s so amazing and I love her so much. NOT tearing up a little bit about how I am so extremely blessed to have met her. Jesus.

But uh. After that it was time to start packing, kind of. There was a not-small amount of crying. And divvying up of stuff, since I like. Did NOT have space for all of my things. Three piles: taking with me, hopefully to have mailed back to me (seriously, I need some of that stuff please. :C ), and Giving to silly because I love her and I love giving her things.

In that last group was: my first fountain pen (idk if that one or the one leye gave me was the first one I owned. But hey. Meh.) (I’m just gonna pronounce that as Ley-yey for the rest of my life. For anyone who’s not me, though, it’s like lye). She used it to write poetry on the piece of paper I used to demonstrate how to use it, and to get the ink going, and stuff. She then folded it up to look like a heart, because she’s the biggest dork on earth and also my favorite person ever to live. She did this while she was, in her words, “picking stuff out of the downstairs laundry baskets”, which is why I walked in on her doig this. The second time a ploy like this was foiled by my walking downstairs. What a loser. And yes I cried a LOT on reading that poetry, because, just… jesus. How could I not. my tentacle skirt. Please take care of it, it’s important! Hopefully I have found suitable replacements for it… probably some other stuff? I don’t fully remember… sorry….

She gave me the shirt for the now-defunct electric company owned by the Shithead dad of her childhood friend. Holy FUCK the perfect gift for me. Wow. I love artifacts!!! (we are both magpies lmao)

Never did find that pair of compression shorts she gave me last time I was down. I hope those turn up sometime, they were super handy.

Uh… so yeah. We packed up. Got most of my stuff sorted out, and figured out an outfit for the next day. I think here was where we watched otgw, actually. But yeah! Uh…

I don’t really remember much more, except hugging each other and crying. And remembering that soon I would be apart from her and feeling a deep, yawning sense of loss. And a longing to graduate so I can join her up north.

I tried to go to sleep with her, but I failed. I ended up closing my eyes for a little while, then stealing the 8.5x11 boarding pass I printed and gave to her (we each got one of the boarding passes, and one of the like. Ticket printed things? Of when I went up there. Even), and wrote her a letter on it with my/her fountain pen. I don’t remember much of what it said, beyond that I loved her in a way I never thought possible.

Went to the airport. Cried a little bit on the way there. Focused more on keeping intact for both of our sakes, since we were going on the Frightening route to the airport. I started to break down as I started getting close, thugh. Cried into her arms a little more as I got out of the car and left her behind for another few months. God, Ihate it so much.

Writing these journals this far after the fact is bad both because I don’t remember as much, and also because I start missing her all over again. :C:C:C:C:C

But uh… yeah, Ithink that’s it. Became emotionally dead as I went through the airport. Had to rush to make my first flight. Cuz… wanted to spend as much time as possible with my beautiful girlfriend before we had to go to the accursed birds’ nest. The TSA saw me as a girl. That was cool, but then they patted me down real fuckin thoroughly. Ate a biscuit after getting through. Basically slept through the rest of the thing.

Only started crying again once I got home.

Alright. We’re done here I think. I know I forgot a lot and that *hurts* me, but it’ll be alright. Honk.

These journals will likely get less detailed as time goes on. But as their number is yet small I think it’s okay.

#blog #ohio trip 2

3 notes · View notes

asnetlessmi1975-blog · 6 years

Text

They just scream "cool" and "unusual" to me and I love how they add a bit of instant edge and personality to my outfits. Here me wearing them today. They comfortable and versatile, easy to wear all day and commute in.. I jumped into WvW for the first time this week. I don know anything about the objectives or what i suppose to be doing. So like any other PvE guy, I just found the commander and followed the group around. "I think we kind of enjoy the fact that we're lifting weights. We think it's cool, " says Stahl. Is the "Power of 10 " a fitness revolution, or is it just another fitness trend? To find out, 48 Hours asked identical twins Kelli and Vanessa Dunn, plus size models living in New York City, to do a little experiment with us. I think PR and Comms students have to do this one. Its fairly practical and involves a lot of article writing practice, starting from the basics of lead writing, structure, how to properly quote, interviewing basics etc. I personally really enjoyed this class (well, the tutes at least, since I never went to the lectures) and found it to be really useful. I absolutely hate that. Last year my boyfriend and I were hiking Salmon River trail, and out of nowhere this lab comes barreling around a bend and tries to jump up on us. He was "just being friendly" but it was a very narrow, slippery section with a cliff dropping about 20 30 feet towards the river on the right, and the dog nearly knocked him off. This ridiculous picture well illustrates the heartless conduct of the masters. While people starved, lap dogs were waited upon by maids. This was a serious masquerade on the part 목포출장마사지 of Avis Everhard. This pregnancy has been more symptomatic than my first (10yo) and it is so interesting how differently your body responds to each pregnancy. I struggling to minimize my weight gain as I only allowed to gain 15 and I scared to step on a scale. Anyone else in the same boat?lifesaboxofchocolate 34 points submitted 13 days agoIt may matter more when you looking for a job post PhD. On Friday I picked up The Barest Blush in 01 First Lover (it now sold out online but they had plenty in my store). Very lovely natural looking blush and I think I will get a lot of use out of it. I also got The Edgiest Kohl Shadowstick in Spiced and then went back this morning for Jaded Grounded. I would say start either with the Melano CC or Cosrx BHA. Too many actives at once will probably freak out your skin and make it worse. You can use the Melano CC either AM or PM after you cleanse your face, same with the BHA. I also starting into minimalism so it doesn really suit my lifestyle so much anymore. As for environmental impact too some of them have excessive packaging so beware of those. I tried other boxes too, but I don need more than one at a time, that for sure.. Currently in the US Military. Was back and forth about re enlisting for another 4 years (have done 9 to this point). I have a 3 year old daughter at home who i havent seen in almost 2 years for more then 3 weeks. After that I try promenades. If they stop a lot, I rule out doing other moves. If we start swinging out I do a vanilla swingout before I start 목포출장마사지 adding turns, redirects, etc. 100 is an extremely long grind. Not saying completely against it as I a newer player, but playing bots over and over eventually just becomes a stomp and can easily teach newer players bad habits since they wouldn get punished in situations where they normally would in say a normal blind/draft. Especially learning jungle since the bots don actually specifically jungle though they may clear the camps (not from what I seen).

1 note · View note

my-add-chronicles · 6 years

Text

The Day Guide: The ADD-friendly

To Do List/Day Plan

Ok here’s my super helpful ADD routine system I came up with yesterday. A soft to-do list/a soft routine system that isn’t suffocating.

I’ll call it the Day Guide

Pretty simple concept really but I’m very (!) happy about it because it’s been super useful to me after a lot of experimenting, the most useful one I’ve come up with so far.

The night before, in regard to tomorrow..

Get a lined piece of paper or something.

Write on the left side times starting with the earliest you might wake up tomorrow, and write times all the way down the left margin, half an hour at a time.

10:30 am

11:00

11:30..

Etc.

Ending with the very latest time you anticipate going to bed.

Maybe fold the paper in half vertically so there’s a crease down the center so you remember to save space because for the night before you wanna use just the left side of the page.

At the top of the left side of the page write ‘plan’. On the top of the right half write ‘actual’

Next to each time, closer to the left side (the plan side)- (in pencil) start filling in the times with time-sensitive stuff.

Got class at 1 pm? Write that down.

Also take this time to plan when you have to leave. Takes 30 minutes to get to class? Also write down ‘leave for class’ at the 12:30 spot.

Do that until everything that is time-sensitive is on the page.

Then, on another page, label it ‘Wednesday’ or whatever day it will be.. brainstorm all the things you need to do and want to do.

Write first the things you absolutely must get done first

Like..

Wednesday:

•Buy groceries

•Meditate [like if you’ve made a goal and would be upset if you don’t fit it in]

•do essay draft

•pay bill

•[self-care]

.. then after you list those, make a list labeled “Extra:” and list all those things you’re itching to do but won’t be in trouble if you don’t have time to do.

Example-

Extra:

•lift weights

•call and ask about making next appointment

•make a blog post

•read

•watch that one movie

—-

Then return back to your Day Guide page with all those time-sensitive events, and look at it with your list next to it.

In pencil on the left half start just filling the day in willy-nilly with the things from your ‘need to do’ section.

Be sorta realistic but also a little idealistic. Assume you wake up sorta on time, but don’t set it up so you’re doomed if you don’t if you’re prone to waking up late. You’ve already written down all the time sensitive things first so now is you adding to to do list items, laying out the day however seems most reasonable and realsitic to you. No need to agonize it, it’s just a guide.

Make sure everything from your ‘need to do’ list is on your Day Guide.

Now, if there’s room, add a few or all of those things you wanna fit in from your ‘extra’ section. If there’s a lot maybe just a few (then you can just save the extras-list to transfer it when you do this again for another day).

Remember this is a guideline, a little bit of idealism is ok.

Then you are done for the night.

Set your Day Guide somewhere obvious like the first place you go in the morning or on top of something you use in the morning- with a pen, and keep your need/extra list in proximity for if you need it for reference.

——

The next day:

Oh look at that! You found your Day Guide! Wow! Not fumbling blindly through the day now are we? But shit, woke up an hour late huh? Little less time for some of that stuff than you hoped. Not to worry! This is how you use the right half of your Day Guide! Have that pen handy!

Bring your Day Guide around with you throughout the day.

On the right half, you do almost the same thing as the night before. Except under ‘actual’ you’re writing down what actually happens on the corresponding line for the time, one task at a time!

You look left for reference!

So you woke up at 10:45 am instead of 10 am.. you look at your plan side on the left. It said to exercise, but that was an extra, so no worries missing that. There’s still time to shower. So once you are ready you write down ‘shower’ on the 11 am line on the right side, and then you go shower.

Then, before the next task, you consult your Day Guide again and write down what you do next.

As you finish things, you can also put a check next to the original plans on the left, regardless of what time you end up doing them, to have context for how much of the original plan actually happened.

At the end of the day.. if it was helpful.. repeat!

Perhaps look at the things on the original Day Guide and transfer any incomplete things to your next ‘need to do/extras’ list when you work on your next Day Guide.

It will also give you context for how realistic or unrealistic your original plan was, or what tripped you up, since you have both a log and a to do list on one page.

I found it super helpful maybe you will like it too?

Obviously it only works if you have the patience to write it down, but aside from writing down times, you can keep it as empty or as full as you like so aside from set-up it can be minimal effort.

Hope it works as well for you as it did for me! I think it may be a keeper

HERE IS A LINK TO PICTURES, BELOW:

AND HERE (below) is a link to my first-draft attempted list, which will give you a sense of what it looks like in action:

#mental health #add #adhd #planning #organization skills #organizing #planner #to do list #day guide

1 note · View note

canaryatlaw · 6 years

Text

okay. well today was fine. better than yesterday I guess, some mental stress over....things starting to dissipate a bit thankfully. alarm went off at 7 and I got up, got ready and was out the door all on time. I get down to the courthouse at like 8:40, perfect timing to meet up for the 9:00 call. and like, actual lawyers have the IDs that let them go around security but I still have to go through security so I was like oh well I should just go through early then and meet them there. So I did, and then I went up to the 22nd floor to wait for the lawyer. this is guy lawyer I was at the deposition with last week, I like him, he’s fun, definitely a bit intense but not in a bad way. Anyway, I’m waiting on the 22nd floor and it’s like 9:10 when one of the other lawyers I was shadowing last week came by and she was like “....is he not here yet????” and I was like welp....nope haha and she was like “if he’s not here in 5 minutes text me” so I say okay because she’s kind of indirectly in charge of me (at this point kinda everyone is??) but like, I don’t wanna be a snitch, and I don’t want this guy to think I sold him out and got him in trouble, so I let 9:15 go and I was like come on dude come on, let me get credit for not snitching lol but it was going on 9:30 and the other lawyer had disappeared down a hallway that she would have to pass by me again to leave and I was concerned that she would walk out and see me sitting there without him and clearly not having texted her and being like “wtf” so by 9:30 I did text her, and I’m not sure what she did, but he finally showed up at like 10 am. and like, from one perspective that sounds really lazy and irresponsible, but I also know that like, my dad does that shit all the time lol because he can, the judges will wait for him to get there because he has a great relationship with pretty much all of them, so I can’t really judge too harshly. We had a lot of cases up though, so we were running back and forth between courtrooms and drafting orders and getting them approved then running to another courtroom and on and on. the end got a bit interesting when we walked in on a case where the judge was asking this plaintiff like “are you represented by (our law firm)?” and she was like yes and the judge was like, PISSED about us apparently missing the call, so we go outside with this person and tried to figure out what was going on while still juggling like three other cases going on in that courtroom, but what we more or less found was that we have no record of this person ever being a client and it seemed like they were a bit mentally.....off. and basically she had stepped up on a case that wasn’t hers accidentally that was a case we were on but not with her. so that was an odd little mix up but we figured it out. Walked back to the office, and once I got there I spent a while locating some files I was asked to scan in for someone which was confusing because they were described as “Davidson, etc” and I shit you not, there were two different stacks of 3 or 4 folders that both had two entirely separate cases with “Davidson” in the name, so I had to do a bit of figuring out to see what was right there. I also ended up calling the help line for this weird oil spill project I got placed on, and I got like accidentally bumped to a survey before actually talking to somebody like twice and each time I had to call they had an exceedingly long message to even get to talk to someone, so I was getting annoyed, and we only have the conference call style phone since it’s a conference room, so like everybody is subjected to hearing the conversation. But I finally got through to them and then had to go find the letters that had been sent and read them off to them and then basically got told they were ineligible for more money but since we were lawyers we probably wanted to appeal that (I don’t actually think we are going to though) then when I got off the phone and emailed the guy who put me on this assignment he was like “okay but what about the business we represent that didn’t get a letter” and I had to be like “without a letter they wouldn’t tell me jack shit” (I didn’t say jack shit obviously) so I’m not sure how that’s going to pan out, but we’ll see. I was supposed to sit in on a deposition at 1 but it ended up getting cancelled, so at 1 I decided to walk over to the whole foods a few blocks away, and while walking there I was totally engrossed in my phone doing some stuff for the DCTV podcast website that I straight up walked right past it, and was like wow I’m literally being such a millennial hipster stereotype right now lol. But I got there, and outside there was a man (I don’t like categorizing people by they status that they might be homeless, but he was panhandling) and he was asking for money, but of course I don’t have any because my wallet just got stolen, but I told him I was gonna go inside and eat and I would bring him out something if he wanted, so he said yes and asked for anything barbecue, so I agreed and went inside. Did my salad first and ate that, then went back to the hot food display and got some of what looked to be the closest to barbecue, something salisbury like, but upon further reflection I think it might’ve been like, salisbury tofu?? so I hope that still tasted okay and edible and I didn’t just waste $14 on a thing full of tofu that tasted like trash. so lesson there to be more aware of these things I suppose lol. I went back to the office and pretty much had something stopping me from doing any of the things I was assigned to, mostly like I hadn’t heard back from the person I was doing it for and couldn’t move on until I heard from them. So I tried to look up the info about the health insurance regarding if they had any of my doctors in their network plan, but it refused to load on me so I got stuck doing nothing for a while. After a bit I got called downstairs to go over making the court schedule because that’s gonna be my responsibility from now on, so I went over it with the lawyer who had been doing it and typed it up, so that’s good to know. I didn’t really do all that much for the rest of the day because I just didn’t really have anything to do. There was a bit of a celebration because one of the lawyers had just tried a parking lot slip and fall case that was apparently kinda iffy on causation (like it wasn’t totally clear that it was actually the business’ fault) and because of that the insurance company wouldn’t even make an offer to settle because (presumably) they thought it was crap, but this afternoon the jury returned a verdict for our client to the tune of $212K, which for a slip and fall case is a HELL of a lot of money, so everyone was very excited about that. Towards the end of the day one of the other new lawyers and I sorted through the folders (such exciting lawyer projects, I know) to separate them into piles for the lawyers morning court call. After that I headed home, normal trip back, I’ve kind of developed this habit of flopping down on my bed for a while after getting home from work and of course kitty wants all the love and attention after being alone all day, so she’s always climbing all over me. So I stayed like that for a bit before getting up and making some food, and then turning on an episode of Friday Night Lights. After I had watched that I decided I was going to take on one of the recipes I had been wanting to make and had had up in my browser for a few days, these were titled “fluffy golden oreo funfetti rice krispie treats” and are basically like, pure happiness in food form lol. of course I’m super obnoxious about how I make my rice krispie treats because I have Standards™ so I had to like, cut some of the jumbo marshmallows I had into quarters so they'd melt more evenly with the mini marshmallows, and then of course had them melt super slowly so the texture would be good. so yeah, that was a bit of a process, but I think it came out pretty well. by the time I finished with this it was like 9:24 pm and I didn’t want to watch a full episode of something before going to bed so I ended up watching like half an episode of a series of unfortunate events, which I think was the last episode of their current season. And after that I started getting ready for bed and am now here. And that was pretty much my day. It’s later than the other nights I’ve been getting to sleep this week so I’m not gonna delay my sleep any further and end this post here. Goodnight babes. Stay classy.

#daily journal #September 2018 #Rachel's lawyer adventures

1 note · View note