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softeningthesound · 3 years ago

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A Guide to Québécois Swear Words!

As a Québécoise, I have strong feelings about our swearing system and it’s fun to try to explain to people who aren’t from here, and even to France French speakers because we just do not have the same expletives. Pretty much every Québécois swear is a direct or twisted up reference to something you’d find in a church or that’s related to the Church. I haven't actually looked into it but that may be because of the wave of secularisation that happened here in the 60's. Keep reading for a list of common swear words, how you can string them together, and some other expressions that stem from Québécois expletives! Useful for writing Québécois characters, or just for fun if you’re into languages.

The verb ‘to swear’ in Québécois French is ‘sacrer’ which in and of itself is a reference to the Church (‘sacrer’ = ‘to make sacred’).

*OSTI or ESTI (less explicit alternatives are ‘esprit’ or ‘osprit’): originally referenced the communion wafer (l’osti). Translated, it can kind of mean ‘fucking’ as an adverb when you add ‘de’ after, ex: ‘C’est un osti de gros banc de neige’ = ‘That’s a big fucking snow bank’ or ex: ‘Il est un osti d’idiot’ = ‘He’s a fucking idiot’. ‘En osti’ is another expression that translates to the adverb ‘fucking’, ex: ‘Ça faisait peur en osti’ = ‘It was fucking scary’. ‘Osti’ can be used on its own or in a string of swears.

*CÂLISSE or CÂLICE (less explicit alternatives are ‘câlique’ or 'câline'): originally referenced the chalice (le calice). Used on its own (when your dad breaks a glass and yells this, he’s real mad) or in a string of swears.

*TABARNAK (less explicit alternative is ‘tabarnouche’): originally referenced the cabinet that holds the ciborium which in turn holds the communion wafers (le tabernacle). Used on its own (when your mom is yelling at you to get in the car and yells this, she’s real impatient) or in a string of swears.

*CRISSE (less explicit alternative is ‘crime’): originally referenced Christ (le Christ). Not the strongest swear anymore, in comparison to ‘câlisse’ or ‘tabarnak’ used on their own.

*CIBOIRE (less explicit alternative is ‘cibole’) and SAINT CIBOIRE: originally referenced the ciborium (le ciboire). I think it’s not used as much by younger people but it’s still very well known, still very much a classic.

*BAPTÊME or BATINSE: originally referenced baptism (le baptême), not a very strong swear and not generally used by younger people except ironically, not really used when stringing swears together, usually said on its own.

*MAUDIT (less explicit alternative is ‘mausus’): means ‘damned’ or just 'damn'. It's used as an adjective and therefore an 'e' is added at the end when describing something feminine, ex: 'La maudite machine' = 'The damn machine'. Can also mean ‘damn’ as an adverb when used with the adjectives ‘bon’ (good) or ‘mauvais (bad), ex: ‘C’est un maudit bon conducteur’ = ‘That’s a damn good driver’ or ex: ‘ C’est un maudit bon souper’ = ‘That’s a damn good supper’.

*SACRAMENT or SAINT SACRAMENT (no softer alternatives): originally referenced the religious ceremony (le sacrement). Used on its own.

*SIMONAQUE or SAINT SIMONAQUE (no softer alternatives): originally referenced someone who had commited the sin of simony (un simoniaque), not currently used to reference a person anymore. Usually used on its own.

*VIARGE or SAINTE VIARGE (no softer alternatives): originally referenced the Virgin Mary (la Vierge). You can yell this at furniture when you stub your toe. I think this word birthed the expression ‘varger sur’ which basically means ‘to violently hit something’??? ex: ‘J’ai vargé sur mon clavier’ = ‘I hit my keyboard a lot’

*MARDE or MERDE: means ‘shit’, not a very strong swear word, used by kids a lot when they’re not allowed to use the adult swear words or even the less explicit alternatives to swear words

*BÂTARD: means ‘bastard’, can reference a person, or is said of something that looks off or strange (‘un arbre bâtard’ = a fucked up looking tree), though that’s less common. You can call a bad driver on the road ‘un osti de bâtard’. Not said on its own to express frustration about something, it’s more of an insult. Fun fact, a ‘pain bâtard’ (bastard bread) is a a loaf of bread usually shaped approximately like an American football, and I think it’s called that because it’s kind of between the shape of a baguette and a regular round loaf or ‘miche’.

*CALVAIRE: means ‘calvary’, basically a monumental cross. Also more of an older generation swear, but obviously still fun to say.

What’s fun with Québécois swears is stringing them together! It’s the beauty of the language. You can put several swears together and string them with the word ‘de’ ( or ‘d’ and an apostrophe before a swear that starts with a vowel). Have some examples!

ex: Osti de tabarnak de saint ciboire de câlisse

ex: Ciboire d’osti de crisse de tabarnak

ex: Tabarnak de sainte viarge d’osti de câlisse

These are for when you fucked up a construction project, get in a minor car crash that’s gonna take way too much time to deal with before you can get going, lose an important Word document, break something that’s really important to you, etc. They’re favourites for angry, macho fathers but everyone who swears also uses them, you just know to stay away from your dad when he’s swearing like this.

If you’re unfamiliar with the language and try to string different words together, it might sound strange if a Québécois reads your writing and it’s not an order they’re used to, but honestly almost any swear word can be put together. If you want to be safe when stringing swear words together, go with two and start with ‘Osti’ (these are failproof: osti de tabarnak; osti de câlisse; osti de marde; osti de ciboire) or end with ‘Câlisse’ (these too are failsafe: tabarnak de câlisse; crisse de câlisse). It’s hard to explain why not everything goes together because I don’t know myself??? (it’s not like we get grammar classes on swearing in French class lmao) but stick to the examples given here and you’re golden! Or just use a single expletive, too. Try to switch up between words, like don’t always use the word ‘crisse’ every time the same person swears in French.

We also use the word ‘fucking’ a lot, borrowed from English as an adverb, and it means what it means in English, ex: ‘Elle était fucking belle’ = ‘She was fucking pretty’ or ex: ‘Je lui ai dit de fucking tourner à droite’ = “I told them to fucking turn right’.

‘Crisse’ and ‘câlisse’ have also been turned into…

- Adverbs (‘crissement’ and ‘câlissement’) that also mean ‘fucking’, ex: ‘C’était câlissement glissant dehors’ = ‘It was fucking slippery outside’

- Verbs (‘crisser’ and ‘câlisser) that usually mean something like ‘throwing’ or ‘dropping’ in the examples I can remember right now, ex: ‘J’ai crissé mon sac à terre’ = “I threw my bag on the ground’ or ex: ‘T’as câlissé tes clés sur ton lit’ = ‘You threw your keys on your bed’

- The expressions 'Qu'est-ce que tu crisses?' or 'Qu'est-ce que tu câlisses?' mean 'What the fuck are you doing?'

- Other expressions, like...

1) the verbs ‘décrisser’ or ‘décâlisser’ which basically mean to either ‘get the fuck out of somewhere’ (ex: ‘Est-ce qu’on décrisse?’ = ‘Should we get the fuck out of here?’) or...

2) the adjectives ‘décrisse’ or ‘décâlisse’ which basically mean ‘fucked up’ or ‘mangled’ (ex: ‘Sa face était toute décrisse après le punch’ = ‘Their face was all fucked up after the punch’, or ex: ‘Mon char était complètement décâlisse’ = ‘My car was completely fucked up’), or...

3) the expressions ‘crisser son camp’ or ‘sacrer son camp’, which also mean ‘to get the fuck out of’ somewhere (ex: ‘Le turn était plate donc j’ai sacré mon camp’ = ‘The party was boring so I got the fuck out of there’). Used in reference to places or events you don’t like or that are boring.

4) more expressions like ‘crisser une volée’ (‘throw a punch’) and 's'en crisser' or 's'en câlisser' (to not give a fuck), ex: 'Ils s'en câlissent de votre croissant' = 'They don't give a fuck about your croissant'

'Être en tabarnak' or 'être en crisse' means to be really fucking angry about something, ex: 'Elle était en tabarnak parce qu'on lui a volé son argent' = 'She was really fucking angry because her money was stolen'

… That’s all I can think of right now, but that’s basically it. Every language has its swear words, and I think Québécois swears are particularly colourful because of the way you can put them together and really express that frustration. Have fun!

(If any Québécois French speakers want to add to this, like favourite expressions, ou des sacres des régions, feel free!)

#omgcp #omg check please #check please #jack zimmermann #zimbits #quebec #montreal #quebec city #québécois #canada #french #languages #polyglot #romance languages #religion #linguistics

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deltazhebird · 4 years ago

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a list of every Québec curse word / variation / insult I could think of and their translation and degree of offensiveness on a scale of 0-10 (kinda subjective)

(0 = you can say it casually and non-offensively at school or at work)

(10 = you can’t say it casually to your boss, teachers, or even family without getting in trouble)

(anything rated 5 or lower is pretty family friendly, above 5 is PG 13)

tabarnak (tabernacle) 10/10

tabarnan (variation of tabernacle) 7/10

tabarnouche (variation of tabernacle) 4/10

tabarouette (variation of tabernacle) 3/10

tabarslak (variation of tabernacle) 7/10

tabaslak (variation of tabernacle) 7/10

taboire (variation of tabernacle) 6/10

tabeurn (variation of tabernacle) 5/10

ta’ (variation of tabernacle) 0/10

hostie (altar bread) 10/10

esti (variation of altar bread) 9.5/10

asti (variation of altar bread) 9.5/10

ostik (variation of altar bread) 9/10

estik (variation of altar bread) 9/10

‘sti (variation of altar bread) 8/10

‘stik (variation of altar bread) 8/10

esprit (spirit) 6/10

osprit (variation of spirit) 6/10

calice (chalice) 10/10

calique (variation of chalice) 5/10

caline (variation of chalice) 2/10

criss (variation of Christ) 10/10

crime (crime / variation of Christ) 1/10

cristi (variation of Christ) 2/10

baptême (baptism) 2/10

batince (variation of baptism) 3/10

batèche (variation of baptism) 3/10

viarge (variation of virgin) 6/10

batard (bastard) 5/10

calvaire (calvary) 4/10

calvasse (variation of calvary) 5/10

ciboire (ciborium) 7/10

saint-ciboire (saint ciborium) 8/10

cibole (variation of ciborium) 5/10

cibouère (variation of ciborium) 7/10

maudit (cursed) 3/10

maudine (variation of cursed) 1/10

mautadine (variation of cursed) 2/10

mautadit (variation of cursed) 2/10

mausus (variation of Moses) 1/10

sacrament (variation of sacrament) 3/10

sacrifice (sacrifice) 2/10

sacréfice (variation of sacrifice) 2/10

simonaque (variation of simoniac) 4/10

merde (shit) 7/10

marde (variation of shit) 8/10

con / conne (dumbass) 6/10

cave (huge dumbass) 7/10

sans-dessein (with no future / dumbass) 2/10

niaiseux / niaiseuse (dumb) 1/10

and I’m sure there are a few I even forgot. you can use a few of these words in one sentence, and some of them can become adverbs or verbs:

Esti, j’suis crissement contente d’avoir fini c’te tabarnak de post-là, caliss! Maudite marde, c’tait long que l’criss à faire, saint-ciboire! J’ai mal à tête que l’tabarnak, mais y faut ben une ostie d’conne comme moi pour faire ça, calique!

Which would very roughly translate (intensity-wise) to:

Goddamn, I’m fucking happy to be finished with this fucking post, shit! Fucking hell, it was long as fuck to do, shit! My head hurts like fucking hell, but only a fucking dumbass like me would do something like that, fuck!

#curse words #french #quebec

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