#silver surfer but powered by cousin porking
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Superman/Doomsday: Hunter/Prey #2 (May 1994)
At last, we find out Doomsday's secret origin! And then kinda wish we didn't, because it's pretty gnarly. In fact, this might be the most disturbing character origin in all of DC Comics, including Vertigo and that "Dark Multiverse" thing they were doing a while back.
But, before getting to Doomsday, Superman has to deal with the mess he left in Apokolips last issue. Thanks to Doomsday's rampage, the Cyborg Superman has taken over the planet and plans to turn it into a new Warworld so he can take it around the universe, conquering other worlds. Yes, he wants to turn the worst planet in existence even worse.
The Cyborg has easily taken care of Darkseid's Parademons by transmitting a frequency that melts their brains. But where's Darkseid himself? He was last seen taking a good beating from Doomsday, and when Superman runs into him, he's... not in great shape.
"DARKSEID IS. TIRED."
Superman is briefly tempted to leave Darkseid to die, but he ends up dragging him to safety and using the Mother Box he borrowed last issue to heal him, because Superman gonna Superman. Just when Superman is lamenting the fact that he doesn't have enough time to go back to Earth for help, Waverider shows up... only to instantly remind Superman that he can't help, due to his sacred vow as a protector of the timestream.
Superman, however, basically tells Waverider to nut up or shut up and use his temporal powers to give him helpful information about Doomsday. Waverider finally succumbs to Superman's bullying and shows him a vision of a "distant planet" circa 250,000 years ago. The planet seems to be uninhabited except for some spiky monsters who kill anything in their sight and a group of scientists inside a reinforced dome. The leader of the scientists is an alien called Bertron who is obsessed with creating "the ultimate form of life" by any means necessary. Including, we soon find out, baby murder.
Following Bertron's orders, the scientists launch an alien baby into the hostile atmosphere and just sit by and watch while the spiky monsters tear it apart in seconds. Then, they scare the monsters away with their weapons, send someone out there to scoop up whatever's left of the baby, clone a new infant from that DNA, and repeat the whole process.
After 20 years of doing that every day, the baby has evolved to the point that it now takes minutes to be torn apart instead of seconds. Also, it's now considerably uglier.
Within 30 years, some of the scientists are starting to show reservations about working at the baby murdering factory, but the progress is undeniable. By now, the baby (more like a large bald dude) is able to survive in the hostile environment indefinitely and actually fights back against the spiky monsters... who kill him every time anyway, but still. Progress!
An indeterminate number of decades pass, and the "baby" has turned into a big, hulking creature that Bertron calls "The Ultimate." The minutes of survival have stretched into full years as the Ultimate walks across the planet hunting the spiky monsters until none are left. Bertron is ecstatic that his creation has finally become an unkillable killing machine. So... what now? Well, suffer an ironic death at its hands, of course, because it turns out Doomsday remembers the thousands of deaths Bertron put him through.
According to Waverider's narration, Doomsday might have wiped out all life in that planet if he hadn't stumbled upon Bertron's supply ship. He ended up bouncing through the universe like a murderous ping pong ball, until he reached a planet called Calaton, whose royal family had gained metahuman abilities through the amazing power of inbreeding (that's not a joke about royal families, that's in the comic!).
After years of being unable to stop Doomsday, Calaton's royals gave up their lives to form an energy being called the Radiant, who looks like Silver Surfer but powered by cousin porking (miraculously, he seems to have all his limbs). It took a week of fighting and an explosion that destroyed a fifth of Calaton, but the Radiant finally managed to kill Doomsday. Unfortunately, the Calatonians have a strange custom that says they can't destroy the bodies of planet-killing aliens and must instead dress them up in gimp suits...
...and launch them into space, which is how Doomsday ended up crashing into Earth in that capsule he finally escaped in Man of Steel #18. This concludes Waverider's presentation.
Back in the present, Darkseid wakes up from his healing nap just in time to recognize that the Cyborg has launched some missiles at Apokolips' food pens to starve the population, because that's what he'd do too. Superman doesn't feel great about teaming up with Darkseid, but he'd feel even worse if innocents died, so he slows down the missiles while Darkseid gets rid of them with his Omega Beams. Darkseid tries to Omega Beam the Cyborg away, too, but he actually survives the blast (that's two people who CAN "withstand the unsurpassed force of the Omega Beams" in as many issues).
Although the Omega Beam hurt him, the Cyborg uses surrounding machinery to repair himself and, while at it, become a giant mecha. Superman hits him with the full force of his heat vision...
...but once again, eye lasers prove ineffective against the Cyborg, since he just rebuilds himself again, even bigger this time. Darkseid, however, claims he was still recuperating from Doomsday's beating before, but he's in tip-top shape now -- and proves it by hitting Giant Mecha-Cyborg with the REAL strength of the Omega Beams, completely disintegrating him. Sorry for doubting you, eye lasers.
With the Cyborg out of the picture, Darkseid thanks Superman for his help by telling him to get off his planet and go chase Doomsday wherever he is. Deesad reveals where he teleported Doomsday to last issue: Calaton, the planet where they already beat him once, figuring they can just do it again -- but Waverider points out that it's exactly the opposite. Because of Bertron and his gang of baby killers, whenever something kills Doomsday, he evolves to surpass it... which means Superman has no chance against him, either.
Everyone present agrees that Superman is pretty much screwed, but Superman says he doesn't care... while his inner narration shows the opposite. In fact, he's terrified, but he's still going after Doomsday to stop him or re-die trying. TO BE CONCLUDED!
Beard-Watch:
It's coming back! You know a Superman story is getting intense when he hasn't had time to shave in a while.
Don Sparrow points out that Superman's "tough guy stubble" seems to come out of nowhere after Waverider's flashback sequence, but I can think of two explanations for that: A) Superman was affected by some minor chronal energy that caused him to age extra fast, at least around the face, or B) that was a long-ass flashback sequence.
Plotline-Watch:
Okay, disregard what I said last time about this miniseries being hard to place in the continuity: Superman explicitly says he's "stronger" and "better" before blasting the Cyborg with his heat vision, so this is definitely happening during the "super-charged powers" storyline. The only hitch is that this is supposed to be taking place during the period when Superman was constantly breaking things and shooting off his heat vision without meaning to, and there's nothing like that here, but that's for the best because 1) that stuff got pretty annoying and 2) minis like this work better if they're not that tied to the ongoing plotlines. No one wants to see five pages of Jimmy Olsen trying to renew his driving license in the middle of a Doomsday fight.
One reason Waverider decides to get off his ass and help out is that he remembers the time he had to watch Superman get beaten to death without doing anything, so he kinda owed it to him. That happened in The Legacy of Superman #1.
There are a couple of references to Armageddon 2001, the 1991 crossover that introduced Waverider: he mentions he was an "activist" before he became a golden being with a flaming head (he even vandalized a statue of Monarch, his original timeline's super-dictator) and when he shows Doomsday's origin to Superman, we see the same psychedelic effect shown in Armageddon whenever he'd touch a superhero to snoop into their future.
What isn't referenced is the time Superman lived in Apokolips for a while, first as an amnesiac anti-Darkseid revolutionary and then as his mind-controlled "son" (in 1987's Legends crossover), but that's understandable since all those memories were wiped from his mind at the end of that storyline.
Did Darkseid really kill the Cyborg, as Superman seems to think? Nah. We'll find out what really happened soon enough.
Waverider's narration claims that, after Doomsday left that unnamed planet where he was created, the natives found Bertron's lab and became obsessed with genetic experimentation, "sending them down the path of a unique and disastrous future." On that note, Don Sparrow says: "I love the detail on page 27, explaining that had he stayed, Doomsday would have killed the entire planet. It’s like, who cares about some random planet?" Yeah, why are they giving us so much detail about that place?! Weird.
Patreon-Watch:
Our latest Patreon-exclusive article was about Steel Annual #1, an Elseworlds story set during the Civil War that, coincidentally, also features dead kids as a major plot point (Superman writers were in a dark mood in 1994, huh). Read that and more by joining Aaron, Chris “Ace” Hendrix, britneyspearsatemyshorts, Patrick D. Ryall, Bheki Latha, Mark Syp, Ryan Bush, Raphael Fischer, Kit, Sam, Bol, and Gaetano Barreca at https://www.patreon.com/superman86to99!
Also join me in reading more from Don Sparrow, after the jump...
Art-Watch (by @donsparrow):
On one hand, the concept of each of the covers just being a step by step sequence of the two main characters streaking into battle has a certain power and simplicity. But on the other hand, there’s little to differentiate them (particularly these first two) and it can feel a bit repetitive. Another detraction is that the computer generated background on the last issue looked like a wall of flame, but shifting the colour to green just looks like a tie-dye pattern, which doesn’t make sense for the story. Still: Great drawings of both characters.
The first few pages are another good showcase of Jurgens’ unique very tall panel layout, and while it’s mostly exposition (helped a lot by the gradient colour background representing the timestream) there are a few interesting, if odd details about Vanishing Point. First, what the hell is that pediment on the window of Vanishing point? It looks a little like Legion villain Validus, but not perfectly so. Secondly, it’s so eccentric that the time viewer Waverider looks at here is an animated piece of parchment, complete with feather quill pen.
Further along the silhouetted image of an injured Darkseid is very cool. The colouring is a real star throughout, but I particularly like the gold rim lighting on the red metal of the Cyborg’s face.
As we see Doomsday’s origins, it’s interesting to see how Bertron ages. He looks like a malevolent E.T.!
The image revealing Doomsday’s final form is a classic, even if he’s starkers. They also can’t seem to keep his physiognomy straight—if he’s solid mass with no organs, why does he need a belly button? The ink spatters indicating his killing blow of Bertron are a restrained way of showing something gory is happening.
Calaton looks a lot like the fake Krypton from Adventures of Superman #500, though there’s a lot of nice design that went into a fairly short section of the book. It’s funny that a story featuring Hank Henshaw, himself an alternate take on Mister Fantastic, would birth the Radiant, who visually is virtually indistinguishable from The Silver Surfer, who also made his debut in Fantastic Four comics. [Max: Ha! They should have brought Inbred Silver Surfer back for the Superman/Fantastic Four crossover featuring the Cyborg...]
Explaining the containment suit and metallic block where we first find Doomsday is a nice touch.
We talked in a previous review about how Image-comics-inspired the colouring is on this mini-series, but how badass Superman looks throughout is also vaguely reminiscent of Image titles at the time. The cross-hatching and tough guy stubble appearing (quite suddenly—he had none before his Waverider trance!) makes Superman look pretty tough-as-nails. However later in the book as Superman flies off to confront the Cyborg, his face shows so much concentration he begins to look vaguely like Manny Pacquiao—so you know it’s gonna be a good fight!
The image of the Cyborg shaking like a ragdoll upon the impact of the Omega beams is a great, electric effect. The single panel the most similar to Image comics must be on page 43 where Superman’s eyes glow red before blasting the Cyborg’s rebuilt body away. While the “eyes glow red because he’s mad” effect is done to death today, when this was published, it was rare enough to be pretty exciting. Darkseid’s march, and dialogue is pretty awesome as he takes care of the threat of the Cyborg Superman. In that way, this is an odd issue—Superman has almost no effect on the outcome. It’s Waverider who fills Superman in on Doomsday’s origins, and it’s Darkseid who destroys the missiles, AND dispatches the Cyborg Superman. I suppose none of that would be possible without Superman’s mercy, helping Darkseid heal, but Superman mostly stands around watching the action in this issue. Lastly, Waverider on page 46 looks a lot like Arnold Schwarzenegger, and it’s fun to think of his thick Austrian accent trying to make its way around all the timestream techno-jargon Waverider spouts. [Max: "Get to da Vanishing Point!"]
SPEEDING BULLETS:
Wait, did the Cyborg just flat out kill Desaad? I guess not, but it was a cool line. [Max: He's alive by the end of the issue, but wasn't there a story that revealed Darkseid is constantly killing and recreating Deesad? Maybe he did that off-panel.]
Do you agree with Superman’s hectoring Waverider about giving him information from his unique knowledge of the timestream? Superman would have some trouble with the old Prime Directive if he were in Starfleet.
Kinda nuts that the female scientist waited THIRTY YEARS to voice her objection to killing an infant all day every day! There’s a lot of unanswered questions about these scientists. What are they paid? Do they get time off? [Max: I always got the impression that these scientists were aliens too, but this time I noticed Bertron says "this world of yours" to them... So I guess they're meant to be [SPOILERS] Kryptonians, from a habitable part of the planet? Their clothes do match the wardrobe in the early parts of World of Krypton, especially that one lady's earrings. Knowing their race, they probably did it just for the love of science... and launching babies.]
I find myself interested in “the beasts” that Doomsday combats while he’s developing. We’ve never seen them before, or since in any stories set on… that particular planet. [Max: Same here. I like their cartoonish look, too. DC Nation should have done some Roadrunner-type shorts featuring Baby Doomsday escaping the spiky monsters and dying in some wacky new way every week!]
Page 23 they kind of bury the lede, just casually mentioning that if killed, Doomsday revives, evolved past whatever killed it. That’s a pretty insane power level.
Bertron getting murdered by his creation was actually a pretty good metaphor for Krypton’s scientific community—coldly experimenting for science’s sake, with no thought to the consequence they may face in the future. More on that in the next issue.
What kind of food do the food pens hold? Like grain and stuff? [Max: Didn't a Darkseid-themed cereal box show up as a variant cover recently? Yep, found it. It's probably that.]
Everyone--hero and villain--all telling Superman he will for sure lose to Doomsday has to be a knock to his confidence!
#superman#dan jurgens#brett breeding#doomsday#waverider#linear men#apokolips#darkseid#deesad#hank henshaw#krypton#superman/doomsday: hunter/prey#silver surfer but powered by cousin porking#get to da vanishing point
23 notes
·
View notes