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nimble-stuff · 2 years ago

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Attempted Rape || Donnie - Blue Raspberry, Part III “...I want you to live a long, long life with scars to remember me by.”

FANDOM: ROTTMNT Blue Raspberry, Part I Blue Raspberry, Part II Also on AO3

@badthingshappenbingo

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PLEASE CONSULT CWs UNDER THE CUT

CWs (Please read in full) 

- Attempted S/A. All characters involved are teenagers. The event is not glamorized and is discussed and described as something reprehensible. It doesn’t go beyond the attempt. - A character who is a teenager briefly reflects on their sexuality and sexual experiences. The descriptions are vague. If any of this subject matter is upsetting to you, I urge you to please, please put yourself first and read responsibly. General Author’s Note: I'm sorry this took so long! I was extremely sick for a few weeks, and on top of it writing this was very, very difficult and emotionally taxing for me in a way I'm not sure I can properly articulate. I didn't want to shy away from the reality of peer-on-peer sexual violence between teenagers, but at the same time I tried to write in a way that's respectful to the subject matter. I'm scared that I didn't accomplish that in the end but know that I had to do a lot of staring in the mirror. I remember seeing a lot of things when I was a teenager that deeply bothered me so I had to go digging deep into those repressed memories! Man I really did go to a rough high school.

---

Donnie lost track of his brothers hours ago, but their absence wasn't a concern this time. He was hacking the sound system to play his preferred playlists. This sight would have been unthinkable before the Krang invasion, but nowadays, the world was all kinds of weird. It was a blended yōkai-human teen party in the Hidden City, and technically, the Hamato brothers were crashing it, along with most of the party-goers crowding the mansion. He didn’t know who the host was, only that when he and his brothers had heard about the event through the grapevine, they couldn't refuse.

“C’mon, we’ve never gone to a party before!” Leo begged Raph.

“Please, please, please, please, please, please, please?” Mikey grabbed Raph’s ankle and was dragged along the floor.

“I desire a night of debauchery!” Donnie shouted.

“We’ve had parties before,” said Raph.

“Yeah, with just family,” said Leo. “That’s boring. This is a teens-only event!”

“You know some moron is gonna bring alcohol, and we’re underage,” Raph said with satisfaction, as if that settled the matter.

“We won’t touch the stuff,” said Mikey.

“I just want to show off my dance moves,” said Donnie. “I have no interest in intoxication. For the moment.”

“Raph, this is our chance to do something normal teenagers do,” said Leo. “We’re not gonna be the weirdest ones there, and there are already yōkai, so we don't have to use the costume excuse.”

“Please, please, please!” Mikey begged.

Raph rolled his eyes with a sigh and caved. He came along as their chaperone, but when Donnie last saw him, Raph was showing off his diving skills to the crowd and drinking a whole carton of apple juice without pouring it out.

The party was wild, even by teenage standards, and, in line with Raph’s expectations, it was pretty obvious that someone had handed out alcohol at some point. Yōkai teens knew how to go crazy, which was attributable to the looser laws of the Hidden City. The humans who tagged along for the event poured in through a portal in the living room and would probably be too hungover in the morning to remember anything. No one seemed to know who the host was, only that the mansion could fit five lairs, and the music made ears bleed.

Donnie leaned over the balcony, catching a glimpse of Leo, who was surrounded by a crowd of both humans and yōkai. He was spinning a hilarious anecdote, and the audience was roaring with laughter. The sight was surreal, almost like a peek into their lives if they went to a regular school. Leo was basking in the attention, and it stirred a satisfying warmth in Donnie's chest - something akin to pride. After everything they'd been through, Leo deserved to have some time off.

"Hey, there you are!" Mikey hopped up onto the balcony with a flip, perched on the rail and swinging his legs. "I've heard this song like, five times now, and I know it's one of your favorites," he said.

"What a strange but welcome coincidence," Donnie drawled.

"So you're not hacking the sound system, forcing everyone to listen to your tunes?"

"Gasp! You dare accuse me of music-related crimes?!"

"If I were, would you consider committing a music-related crime in my name?"

"...Depends on what kind of reward I could expect."

"How about free hugs?"

"Psh, those cost nothing. Literally, that's why they're free. What else you got?"

"My unending gratitude and love."

Donnie rolled his eyes. "I suppose I could provide a free sample...okay, Miguel, name your request."

"I'm Blue."

"Absolutely not."

"Donnie, if you play I'm Blue, I guarantee that Leo will start dancing to it! It'll make him happy, it'll make me happy!"

"I'm thinking of rescinding music requests."

"Donnie, I'm begging you! I need to hear it!"

Mikey latched onto his arm and shook. Donnie groaned. Only for Mikey.

“You’re lucky you’re my favourite brother,” said Donnie.

“I am?!” Mikey asked. “Do you mean that, Dee?!”

“Nevertheless, I am going to make myself scarce to somewhere quieter to get away from it.

Donnie put on I’m Blue, and no sooner had the singer started singing about a guy living in a blue world when he saw Leo bob his head. He said something else that made his audience laugh. Then the chorus started and he was dancing so horribly that Donnie averted his eyes. Mikey whooped and egged him on.

“I’m not related, I’m not related, I’ve never seen him before in my life, we’re not even the same species,” Donnie chanted under his breath.

He retreated inside the house, away from the raunchy partygoers and deafening music. While Leo entertained the guests, it was an excellent opportunity to do some light snooping. After all, it wasn't every day that he got to sneak around in a yokai mansion. The house resembled a human home, albeit with more mystical objects and scientific marvels lying around. Donnie wondered if the host's parents knew about the party.

His feet crunched on discarded snacks as he mapped out the house. His scans picked up an abundance of abnormal energy signatures, which he could analyze later as a perfect late-night activity. Donnie found himself in an empty office with large windows overlooking the party. The room was deserted and untouched by the partygoers. It was an impressive office, all things considered, with bookcases populated by rare books and an impressive portrait of a moth yokai hung over a fireplace. A self-congratulatory self-portrait, perhaps. Donnie scanned the books and found most of them uninteresting. However, some appeared to be printed fan fiction, which he took photos of for blackmail material.

As he turned to leave, the beats of "I'm Blue" died down, and he took two steps before someone cranked his arm behind his back, and something sharp jabbed into his neck. Donnie struggled, half-expecting to hear one of his brothers burst out laughing, telling him he was too jumpy.

Instead, he caught a whiff of the scent of blue raspberry.

Donnie glimpsed the person holding him reflected in the portrait's glass. Kendra flashed him a wicked smile and said with casual flair, “Hey, Donnie.”

Donnie plunged into ice water. He fought and pulled; she wasn’t strong, he could still pull away—Then he looked in the reflection and saw that it was her bionic pinky finger jabbed at his throat, transformed into a sharp knife.

Kendra’s reflection grinned horribly and she shoved him into the waiting arms of Jeremy. Stupid, he was so stupid. He’d felt eyes on him during the party and assumed they were from the other partiers, should’ve known the eyes of the enemy when they were trained on him. Should’ve felt Kendra’s stare anywhere. It was a unique sensation, a cold prickle that climbed up his spine, and he hadn’t recognized it.

In the year since he’d last seen Jeremy, he’d gotten taller, broader, stronger. Donnie was ready to fight, but Kendra had caught him off-guard and his senses hadn’t caught up yet, and Jeremy seized him in a hard arm lock from behind. Donnie’s feet lifted off the ground as he fought back, then couldn’t without threatening to snap his bones in half.

“Geez, I can’t believe you were right,” said Jeremy.

“Of course I was right,” said Kendra. “I knew the moment I saw your stupid ass brother that you couldn’t be far behind.”

“You’ll have to be more specific than that, they’re all stupid,” said Donnie.

Donnie kicked Jeremy’s shin. No reaction. Jeremy pulled Donnie into a full-on hold, grabbing him from under the armpits and locking his hands behind Donnie’s head. His lower body flailed in the air, trying to land a good kick at Kendra as she gawked with wide, adrenaline-fueled eyes.

“Kendra, can we just go?” It was Jase’s voice. Jase stood by the door, looking nervous and off-balance. A light insult in his direction would be enough to push him over.

“Ugh, why are you always such a fucking coward?” Kendra demanded. “Christ, I’m not letting this go this time.”

“Oh, how long are you gonna hold a grudge?” Donnie demanded. “Not to mention, you owe me!”

“Owe you?!”

“I saved your life! I could’ve left you to the Foot Clan.”

“That doesn’t count, Donnie. Besides, I could’ve done the same.”

“Kendra, I think we should really just go,” said Jase. “His brothers are literally right outside.”

“Yeah, and too busy being show-offs to care.”

“What are you doing here, Kendra?” Donnie demanded.

“What the hell does it look like? I was just enjoying the party until you came along. I could practically see your forehead over the heads of the crowd.”

“I knew I should’ve killed you when I got the chance.”

“Well, you fucked that up. Hey, nice stick, by the way. Is it new? I liked the old one better.”

Kendra picked up his bō, twirling it with the haphazard care of someone who had never handled one before. Sweat formed on the back of his neck before Jeremy's hot breath dried it up. The familiar buzz of anxiety clouded his thoughts, and he watched Kendra examine the smooth wood of his bō with an unflinching stare. A few hundred pounds of dismay dropped into Donnie’s stomach.

He knew the look on her face, knew her well. He recognized the satisfied smirk of Kendra cooking up a new way to be unrepentantly evil, knew the smirk that grew into a toothy grin, creating a deep cleft in Donnie’s chest. His breathing increased, but his throat constricted, barely allowing oxygen to fill his anxiety-filled lungs. He felt like he was about to drown on dry land.

“Oh, I got a horrible idea,” Kendra announced, and she laughed, darkness gathering in her eyes. “Damn, I might actually be evil after all. Jeremy, keep holding him.”

“Kendra?” Jase said.

“Shut up, Jase, and watch the door.”

“What are you—”

“I said watch the fucking door!”

Jase turned and did as instructed.

“Ever the good little follower, huh?” Donnie rasped out. He could taste the bitterness on his tongue.

Kendra tightened her grip on Donnie's throat, forcing both him and Jeremy to fall to the ground. Donnie's panic reached a fever pitch, desperate to escape her grasp. In his frenzy, he would have gladly hurled himself through the nearby glass window. In the very peripheral of his vision, he saw Leo surrounded by his posse, ignorant of what was happening. Donnie couldn’t fathom how Leo’s world was expanding when his was ending.

Donnie clawed at Jeremy’s arms before he locked up his arms, facing him towards Kendra. Her hand touched Donnie’s hip. He wasn’t claustrophobic, but the room was pitching. Dread punched into his gut and released chilling adrenaline. Donnie screwed his eyes shut, hoping it would lock out the sensation of Kendra pressing against him, pressing against his knees, pressing them apart—

He realized what was coming, what she wanted. Humiliation. It wasn’t enough hurting him. Exposing him. She wanted everything. His identity. His dignity. Shutting his eyes amplified her presence, made her wretched touch burn on his skin like she was holding it against hellfire. No matter where he went, what he did, Kendra could insert her presence into it, blow her breath on his cheek. Donnie pressed his cheek against the shoulder of Jeremy’s windbreaker, digging his nails into his palms until hot blood ran down his wrists.

“Kendra—” Donnie’s voice stumbled, struggled over words, wound them up tight. He didn’t recognize his voice. He wrenched one leg away from her, pressed his calf up against her sternum. “Kendra, think about this—”

“Keep begging, Donnie, you know I like it,” said Kendra.

“Kendra, please—”

Liquid ice pumped through Donnie’s vein. He froze, despite every ounce of willpower screaming at him to fight. Kendra’s hands were a curse that nullified his body, made him dizzy with fear. She pushed his calf aside and ran a cautious hand up the length of his long legs. Extending her bionic pinky finger, she transformed it into a small knife, not even big enough to cut vegetables. Only enough to cut him.

He thought for a horrifying moment that she was going to slice his shorts right off. Although she didn’t, what she did do was nevertheless awful. Kendra insert the blade into the meat of inner thigh and carved.

Stars went supernova in the black of Donnie’s eyelids. He decided to keep them open, the lesser of two evils. At least with his eyes open he saw what was coming, see what Kendra was doing. He bit his tongue on the pain, then couldn’t hold back anymore and cried out, jerking his leg until Kendra held it steady with crushing force. Maybe he could still fight, kick her while she was distracted, bite Jeremy on the arm, but his body froze, couldn’t and didn’t move.

“Kendra,” Donnie said.

“Relax, I’m just marking my territory,” said Kendra.

“Just kill me.”

“I’m not gonna kill you, Donnie. On the contrary, I want you to live a long, long life with scars to remember me by. In fact, I hope you meet the love of your life, so they can see this and know that I got to you first.”

A sudden spike of pain made Donnie jolt. Kendra drove the blade in deep, slicing with the confidence of someone who wanted to make the scars last. Against his better judgment, Donnie looked down and saw the outlines of bleeding letters.

His chest was heaving, but he couldn’t intake oxygen, and he had little choice but to rest his head against Jeremy’s shoulder and stare at the ceiling. Raph’s awkward sex talks flooded back to him, and despite his confidence in the power of science, he couldn’t—he wanted to remember what Raph had said, what had Raph said about this? Just say no? No, he’d said to fight. Donnie’s body wouldn’t cooperate, he couldn’t even though it should be so, so simple to crush Kendra’s head between his knees and throw her off. Raph made it sound so easy.

He’d never thought about sex before, not seriously. It was a biological urge, a distraction to be dealt with behind closed doors. Donnie had never—well, not with someone else. He ran through the process in his mind, struggled to remember Raph’s awkward sex talks, realized that technical knowledge didn’t make up for lack of experience. Shit, Kendra was turning him inside out.

Donnie made a strangled, awful sob when Kendra moved onto his other leg. He felt he might pass out. He needed to breathe yet his chest was cluttered with heaving cries. His face was wet. Donnie couldn’t tell it was sweat or tears. Both tasted salty. His gaze travelled and locked with Jase standing by the door and he was looking at him with open fear and Donnie had to pull his eyes away with shame.

“Hey, Jase, get a picture of this,” Kendra said.

“I…” Jase was holding onto the doorknob with white-knuckled strength.

“C’mon, don’t be an ass!”

“I gotta go.”

Jase bolted out the door.

“Fucking typical!” Kendra huffed. “Fine, I’ll do it myself. Take a good, long look, Donnie.”

Donnie stared at the ceiling panels. They were a deep onyx, almost reflective.

“I said LOOK!”

Kendra seized him by the back of his neck and forced his gaze down, at the words she’d written, one on each inner thigh. Donnie could barely read them through a watery film and he watched tears make a long journey from his eyes to the floor.

---

“So I said, ‘You really shouldn’t play too much faith in atoms.’ And so Donnie—that’s my stupid brother—he was like, why not? And I said, ‘Because atoms make up everything!’”

Leo’s audience, a collection of both human and yōkai teens, some drunk, some not, roared with canned laughter, although the joke was pretty terrible even by his standards. For the moment, Leo didn’t care. He was in his element, a true extrovert’s paradise, at the centre of a gaggle of people whose names he didn’t remember at a party at an address he couldn’t recall. It was the epitome of the teenage experience, a night of mindless debauchery and Splinter didn’t even know where they were.

It was liberating. Living in the sewers often felt like living in a prison. Sure, they had the Hidden City to retreat to, but Leo liked sunshine and crowded beaches, and not getting stared at, and it was hard to replicate the feeling of the sun on his face when the Hidden City was so deeply entrenched underground in more way than one. He wanted to go to movies without wearing a disguise, and sometimes—though he would never admit it—he even wanted to go to school.

But tonight, the human and yōkai teens around him didn’t care about that. They didn’t care about appearances, or who lived on what surface. No one cared and the freedom tasted mesmerizing.

The crowd was still in the middle of laughter when Leo caught an unexpected movement out of the corner of his eye and his smile caught. A hand grabbed his arm.

“Wait, I know you,” Leo said, turning to the new face.

It wasn’t new, though. It was Jase.

“You need to help Donnie,” said Jase, before Leo could say anything.

“What?”

“You need to help Donnie.”

Ice crystals formed in his veins. The audience was still laughing over nothing. It didn’t matter anymore, the popularity, the stories, the stares of admiration. He thought about Donnie, about Jase. About the common thread that linked both of them together.

Where was Donnie?

It had been a while since he’d seen Donnie. He scanned the balcony where he’d last seen him and saw nothing.

“Where?” Leo asked.

“Office, second floor.” Jase pointed to the house. “It’s on the left—”

Leo was running before Jase could even finish his sentence. He didn’t even take the stairs, just crawled up a pillar and over the railing of the balcony. There was only one way Jase would be here. Donnie hadn’t sent out an emergency distress beacon, but Leo hit the one on his belt, anything to get Mikey and Raph’s attention when he couldn’t spare the time to go looking for them in the crowd.

He shoved past some party-goers and ran.

---

Kendra's fingers seared hot on his throat as she gave his windpipe a tight squeeze. Black spots erupted in Donnie's vision, pulling him into the void. He tried to decide if being unconscious would be better, but Kendra took that away from him too and loosened her grip for him to breathe. Perhaps that's what she wanted—for him to remember.

"Jeremy, do you want to go first, or should the stick go first?" Kendra asked conversationally.

"I'll go after the stick," said Jeremy.

"Just don't get pissed if you get a splinter."

Kendra reached for his bō, and Donnie desperately wanted to fold together like origami paper, to hide small, vulnerable fissures growing wider and wider in his flesh.

BANG.

Hope literally broke down the door.

Leo looked like a saviour when he stepped over the threshold, a long-awaited hero here to slay the dragon and rescue him. Donnie gasped out his name, "Leo!" and watched in satisfaction as angered surprise appeared on Kendra, hardening her, tight with fury at the interruption.

Leo froze. He took in the sight in front of him - Jeremy holding Donnie from behind, Kendra between his legs, his bō in her hand. They all just stared for a long while as Donnie watched everyone calculate their next move.

Something horrible happened to Leo's face. Stormy rage gathered and exploded. He drew a katana in a single move.

He and Kendra were two gunslingers at high noon, and Kendra held up her bionic finger at the exact same time. A powerful blast ripped through the room, and Leo leapt to the side to avoid a white hot laser beam. Kendra must've taken his advice about the heat sink. The arms holding Donnie let go. Jeremy was gone. Donnie scrambled back, crying out, and then - glass shattered. He glimpsed Kendra standing in front of the broken window, and their gazes caught in the moments before she leapt out. When they did, she smirked something awful and blew a kiss.

By the time Leo got to his feet, Kendra and Jeremy had both leapt out the window, both with katanas drawn. Donnie saw the intention in his face to pursue them, to leave him.

"Leo?" Donnie said, unable to keep the hysterical note out of his voice. "Leo?!"

The call worked. Leo rushed back to Donnie.

"Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God!" Leo exclaimed. "Donnie, are you alright? Holy shit!"

Donnie didn't get time to answer when Raph barrelled in through the door, followed shortly by Mikey.

"What the hell is going on?!" Raph asked.

"Raph, I need you to take Donnie home," said Leo. He sliced a portal through the wall. "Mikey, you're with me."

"What? What's going on?"

"Take. Donnie. Home!"

No argument, no leeway. Donnie's senses were alight with panic, and he saw Mikey and Raph's eyes flick to the blood pooling on the ground beneath him. He saw the argument die in Raph's eyes as he scooped him off the ground and they dove through the portal.

---

They lost the Purple Dragons so quickly it was almost comical. Leo spent what felt like an eternity leading Mikey around the area surrounding the mansion, searching for any sign of them, but came up empty-handed. Kendra had made a speedy escape, and when they returned to the party to find Jase, he had also vanished. He had enough of a conscience to call for help when Donnie needed it, but apparently felt guilty enough to make himself scarce when Leo started looking for him. It was as simple as that.

Leo couldn't stop trembling. He felt like a newborn child, bombarded with sights, sounds, and sensations, his senses screaming at him from all sides. He felt like he might be sick. He felt like a failure.

He had failed Donnie. He had made a silent promise to never let this happen to Donnie again, and yet it had occurred right under his nose.

"Leo?" Mikey said.

Leo looked up. He and Mikey were lingering outside the mansion's gates, where he paced, restless and eager for action. His katanas were out, but he couldn't seem to keep a firm grip on them.

"Leo, what happened?" Mikey asked.

He hadn't told Mikey what happened, hadn't told him what he saw, only that they were looking for the Purple Dragons. He didn't need to know the rest, didn't need to be subjected to what Leo had witnessed. Donnie wouldn't want that.

"Leo, what happened?" Mikey repeated.

"You don't need to know," said Leo.

"But something happened to Donnie, right? And the Purple Dragons were involved?"

"Yeah."

"So what happened?"

Leo didn't have an answer he desperately wanted to give Mikey. He paced back and forth on the street, restless, desperate to take action.

“Do you know where Kendra lives?” Leo asked suddenly.

“No?” said Mikey. “Donnie would know that. Should I call—”

“Don’t call him, for fuck’s sake!”

“Leo, you’re scaring me a little here. What’s going on?”

“It’s not important. What’s important is tracking down the Purple Dragons.”

“Leo, look around us. They got away.”

“They didn’t! We just need to look a bit longer—”

“We’re not gonna find them like this! We need Donnie’s help.”

“No, we’re not involving Donnie! Not in this, not with anything to do with those fucking psychopaths!”

Breathless, Leo leaned a hand against the wall and rubbed his eyes. Mikey set a hand on his shoulder and let out a long sigh, resigned.

“We can’t do anything here,” said Mikey. “Let’s go home and see what’s happening.”

Leo didn’t want to face what awaited them back at the lair. He didn’t tell Mikey that, but Mikey must’ve seen it in his eyes because he squeezed hard.

Leo cut the portal into the wall a little more ferociously than he intended, and the cool sensation of stepping through it wasn’t relieving like it usually was. He had to let Mikey push him a little to step all the way through, and when he did, it was to yelling.

The common room was always a mess, but it looked like a bloody hurricane had ripped through in their absence. The crimson trail ended at the open doors to the medbay, where Raph stood with his hands up, and Splinter was off to the side with long lines of stress cracking his face.

“Get the fuck away from me!” Donnie screamed from the medbay.

A drawer of medical equipment flew over Raph’s head, scattering across the floor with a metallic clutter. Splinter turned to Leo and Mikey.

“Blue, what is going on?” Splinter asked.

“Donnie, you need to let me check you for injuries—” Raph ducked as a scalpel flew out. “Geez, Donnie, I’m not trying to hurt you! It’s Raph!”

“I don’t care, I don’t care, I don’t CARE!” Donnie yelled, voice cracked and broken. “I don’t care, just stay away!”

“Donnie’s resisting treatment?” Leo asked. The question had a dual purpose. Dodge his father’s question. Try to lighten the mood.“He always was a bad patient.”

“Leonardo, what happened?” Splinter asked again.

“The Purple Dragons happened,” said Leo.

“What?”

Leo peered around the corner. He’d seen Donnie at his worse, seen him throw tantrums and lose his shit, but this was a whole other level. It was full on ugly-crying, eyes looking past and not at Leo, a wild animal kicked into survival mode. Crimson ran down his legs, but Leo scarcely had time to look before Donnie seized a chair and lifted it over his shoulder, ready to swing. A full body-tremble running through Donnie made the chair shake too, made him unsteady on his feet.

Injured animals were the most dangerous. Leo didn’t want to see where the blood ended, to let his mind go to the worst case scenario. He wanted to huddle in a corner and cry, but when he caught Raph’s look, he saw that he was near tears. Helpless. Raph had done all the tending, all the caring when they were growing up, when Splinter was too lost within himself. It was Leo’s turn.

“Donnie, stop throwing things before you take someone’s head off,” Leo said.

“Leave me alone!” Donnie screamed.

Leo leapt out of the way to avoid getting smacked by an airborne chair. Donnie then seized another.

“That’s the last chair in the room, Donnie,” said Leo. “If you throw that, you’re out of ammo.”

Crazed, Donnie swung the chair, prepared to strike, tears running down his face and dripping off his chin. Leo slid into the room.

“It’s just me,” said Leo. “We’re home now. I know it’s really tempting to throw furniture at this face, but please don’t.”

Donnie swung the chair, grazing Leo.

“Donnie, I’m gonna take the chair from you because you might hurt yourself.”

Another swing. Leo caught it that time, held the chair tight as Donnie fought against him.

“Don’t!” Donnie demanded. “Don’t!”

“Donnie, focus! It’s me, your stupid brother Leo! You’re at home!”

Donnie let out a loud sniff, stared at Leo’s chest. His body was shaking so badly that Leo felt it rattling through the chair.

There was a long moment that pushed past the incoherent terror in Donnie’s eyes. He looked away, ashamed, stared at the blood on the floor, the chair in his hands, the way Leo took the chance to grab firmly onto his hand, the sweat, the silent hum of the overhead lights, Raph’s rapid breathing from behind Leo.

Donnie’s hand was clammy and cold to the touch, and Leo remembered the morning they’d first brought him home after he’d first been kidnapped by the Purple Dragons, how he looked like another being, how much this Donnie in front of him looked like the strange being he’d watched sleep in a beanbag chair in the living room for five nights straight.

Donnie’s shoulders stooped low, and Leo would never be able to tell if it was his willpower giving away or simply the weakness taking over when he pulled the chair out of his hands and set it aside.

“I don’t want to—I can’t, I just can’t—don’t touch me!”

Donnie turned from him, holding his face in his hands like it was enough to hide him. Leo watched the full-body tremor start in his brother’s midsection and radiate outwards, down his legs, destabilizing him. Donnie didn’t seem to be breathing. Leo’s eyes lingered on the blood running freely down his legs.

“Donnie, I’m gonna help you over to the examination table,” said Leo.

Donnie smacked away Leo’s hand. It stung something awful in more way than one. Leo gave him a moment, and moved slow-steady to take Donnie by the arm. Donnie burst out in a crying fit, a horrible sob ripping out of his mouth to fill the deathly quiet of the medbay.

“Relax, Herman,” said Leo. “It’s just your favourite brother, Leo. I’m helping you to the examination table.”

The twelve foot walk to the nearest examination table might as well have been a marathon. Donnie’s knees jolted and threatened to buckle. But he kept going. All that mattered was that he kept going, with gentle coaxing from Leo, until finally he was settled on the edge of the bed and pressing his palms hard onto his ears.

Leo had forgotten entirely that everyone else was watching nervously from the door. It was only when Donnie was seated and not throwing anything that they stepped in.

Leo’s eyes passed over the source of the blood: some deep cuts sliced into his inner thighs. Donnie caught him looking and pressed his legs tight together.

“We need to stitch those up,” said Leo. “They’re pretty deep.”

Donnie smacked Leo’s hand away.

“Goddamn,” Leo said, a little more shortly than he intended. “I’m trying to help!”

“I…I can…” Donnie huffed out. He did something that looked like it took a lot of effort. “I can do it.”

“No, you fucking can’t. You can’t even hold your hands still, let alone hold a small, sharp object.”

“Leo?” Raph said.

“In a minute, Raph. Okay. Okay. We’re gonna stitch you up, Donnie, then you’re just gonna…you’re gonna rest while we figure this out.” Leo fumbled through a few drawers for the suture. His hands were no more steady than Donnie’s. “Everything’s gonna be fine.”

“Leo, I need to talk to you outside,” said Raph. “Now.”

Raph was staring at him with alarmed eyes. His phone was in his hands.

Mikey hopped up on the examination table next to Donnie, and, unlike Leo, Donnie didn’t resist when Mikey slid their hands together.

The common room felt ice cold when Donnie and Raph stepped out. Splinter was sitting just outside the medbay, also starring at his phone with the most haunted, horrible look Leo had ever seen.

“Leo, what the hell is this?” Raph asked.

Raph held out his phone to Leo, showing a series of photos sent from an unknown number, though Leo didn’t have to have one to know who had sent them. It was a series of pictures of Donnie. Graphic ones. He wasn’t naked in any of them, but that didn’t make the sight any less disturbing. Kendra had taken photos from the most disturbing angles possible, and the words carved onto Donnie’s inner thighs were perfectly visible.

They read: KENDRA’S SLUT.

Leo fought to keep his stomach in his body. After a moment, Raph gently shook his shoulder.

“Is this what you saw?” Raph asked.

Leo nodded.

“Did you see how far—”

“I think I stopped it before it could.”

Raph scooped Leo into a hug and squeezed hard, lifting him off the ground. They held each other for a long while, silent, and he looked over the crook of Raph’s elbow to Splinter. He was staring, lost, at his own phone, and it didn’t take long for it to click together.

That bitch. She gained absolutely nothing from this, nothing except tearing Donnie down.

“How many people do you think she sent this to?” Raph asked.

“Too many,” said Leo.

Leo ducked back into the medbay. He didn’t hear what Mikey was saying to Donnie, but the intonations were soothing and hushed.

“Donnie, do you have your phone?” Leo asked. “Mikey, I need yours too.”

“Why?” Mikey asked.

Leo plucked Mikey’s phone out of his hands. Donnie was slower to respond, squinting at Leo, holding his phone protectively.

“Why do you want it?” Donnie asked.

“I just need to see it,” said Leo.

“But why?”

Leo snatched it away without an answer, and it was a good thing he had; Kendra had spammed Donnie with texts. With photos that made Leo want to puke, disturbing angles, close-ups of the words, then a series of very long and graphic texts describing what she would do the next time they met.

“She took pictures, didn’t she?” Donnie asked.

As much as he wanted to lie, Leo couldn’t. Donnie deserved the truth. “Yeah, she did.”

Donnie took two breaths, holding in oxygen between them, then he finally looked away.

“I want Dad,” said Donnie.

“We really need to stitch up those cuts,” said Leo.

“I want Dad.”

It hurt a little. It felt like a rejection. It wasn’t. Leo still felt the hurt skewer his guts, at the way Donnie refused to look at him or Mikey.

---

Raph’s fist slammed into solid brick, cracking a gaping hole that radiated out, a cobweb of their collective trauma. Mikey shook all over, fists curled, arms rigid at his side, and Leo wanted to go up to him and pull apart his fingers to get him to relax, but didn’t want to break him more than he already had and everything felt broken already and he didn’t want to be the cause of more hurt.

Leo felt like a failure. After what had happened with the Purple Dragons the first time around, he’d sworn never to let it happen again, never to let the Purple Dragons interfere with their life, never let any villain to mess with his brothers in the way they’d messed with Donnie. Although he knew intellectually that this was all unforeseen, that he shouldered no real blame, that didn’t make the horrible, crushing weight on his shoulders any less bone-breaking. He saw it reflected in Mikey and Raph, too. Saw white light glinting on Raph’s moist eyes.

“Why didn’t you catch her, Leo?” Raph asked.

“Because she’s too damn smart for her own good and because she had a head start,” said Leo. “Don’t you think I would’ve caught and beat the everliving shit out of her if I could?”

“How could you possibly lose her?!”

“I wasn’t gonna leave Donnie alone! What, you wanted me to leave him bleeding on the floor?”

“I’m just sayin’ if you’d used your portals—”

“I was surprised! You’re not saying anything that I haven’t already told myself a million times over.”

“You should’ve let me chase after them too. If the three of us worked together, we could’ve caught them.”

“You’re too slow on foot, Raph, you wouldn’t have been able to catch up.”

“Apparently you’re not that fast either.”

“Stop it!” Mikey stepped in, voice sharp. “This isn’t about pinning blame on who didn’t do what, and it’s not about your big fat egos! It’s about Donnie. Check yourselves.”

The argument closed down fast. Mikey was good at that.

Splinter emerged from the medbay, looking stressed but focused, and locked eyes with the three of them.

“Purple is fine,” said Splinter. “He has no injuries aside from those cuts.”

“Dad, how far did it go?” Leo asked. “Did he tell you?”

“You appeared before anything…Well, your appearance was timely.” Splinter squeezed Leo’s hand. “Could you boys look after your brother while I am gone?”

“Wait, you’re going after her?” Leo asked.

“Yes, and before you ask, no, you cannot come. I told that girl what the consequences would be if this happened a second time and I intend to deliver.”

“What’re you gonna do? Are you gonna kill her?”

Splinter was quite a moment, thinking. “It…feels wrong to kill someone so young no matter how horrible she is. I will not hurt her…No, I am going to ruin her life, and I will start by speaking with her parents.”

“Ouch, she might wish you’d killed her after that,” said Mikey.

“Dad, let me come,” Leo begged.

“Your spirit is strong, my son, but your brother needs you here,” said Splinter. “Let me handle this.”

There was no room for argument, only a tight, claustrophobic corner where Leo tried to dredge one up and found none, and he realized that he didn’t want to leave Donnie’s side, that he would do anything in that moment to protect Donnie, and that going after his attacker wasn’t the only way to do that.

Mikey slid into the medbay. Leo glanced inside to find Donnie dressed in sweatpants and his preferred purple hoodie pulled far over his head, staring at his hands and flinching away when Mikey came too close. Donnie glanced up, and his and Leo’s stares caught.

Leo blacked out for a moment, and when he came to, he was in his room, grabbing the doorframe for support to steady his breathing. Raph was right behind him, his shadow swallowing him whole.

“It was my idea to go to that stupid party,” said Leo.

“Leo, I’m real sorry,” said Raph. “I’m sorry I yelled, I shouldn’t have—I…I didn’t mean…I didn’t mean any of it. It wasn’t your fault.”

“You think Donnie feels that way?”

“Of course he doesn’t. You stopped her before it got worse, and Donnie’s safe now.”

“I should’ve been there faster.”

“Leo, you got there fast enough. Don’t punish yourself like this.”

“…God, I’m doing just what Mikey said not to do: I’m making it all about myself. How do we fix this, Raph? How?”

Raph didn’t have the answers. Leo realized that none of them did, that it was pointless to go grasping at something that didn’t seem to have them.

Too often in the past, Leo had gone looking to Donnie for answers. How to solve a problem, how to fix something broken, how to win the unwinnable. Now Donnie didn’t have answers either and Leo was adrift in an uncertain sea, the harsh tide battering his broken body on jagged rocks. There was no answer, only the vague sense of a great injustice, and the knowledge that there was very little he could do to mend the cracks left behind.

---

Leo slept restlessly on the couch for a few hours, plagued with nightmares and the vague sense of being unsettled. He felt as though a monster was living under the couch, poking through the cushions with pins and needles, and he ached far too much when his brain convinced him to wake up fully.

Splinter still wasn’t back. Concerning, but not surprising. Leo knew he could take care of himself but he shot out a message to him anyway. It was early morning, and he knew that April would be getting up pretty soon, and suddenly he wondered if Kendra had sent any photos to her as well. Leo shot off a text to April asking her to call him first chance she got and hoped to God she would see his text before anything Kendra might’ve sent her.

Donnie wasn’t in the medbay, but Raph stood guard outside his open bedroom door, leaning on the frame and staring inside. Donnie was at his computer, hands clutched firmly around a controller, headphones on. It was typical Donnie-speak for ‘Don’t-even-think-about-interrupting-me,’ a warning sign to keep others away.

“How’s the brainiac doing?” Leo asked Raph, voice low. “Did you talk to him?”

“I tried,” said Raph. “I tried, Leo, I tried for an hour and he shut me out. Then Mikey tried, and Donnie yelled at him.”

“He yelled at Mikey. Mikey?” Leo massaged his forehead. “Alright, guess it’s Leon’s turn.”

“Don’t take it personally if he gets upset, just…just drop it if he doesn’t want to talk.”

“I can handle it.”

Donnie didn’t stir when Leo pulled up a rolling stool beside him.

“Are you winning, son?” Leo asked.

No answer. Not even a snark or a side eye. Even though Donnie’s attention was on the game, there was no real sense of focus to it, only muscle memory. He was playing Terraria, building a tower that was far more asymmetrical than Donnie typically liked to build.

“Donnie?” said Leo.

“I’m busy,” Donnie said curtly. At least his voice was normal.

“Get un-busy.”

“I formally apologize for all the trouble that has been…I mean, I’m issuing a formal apology.”

“You didn’t cause the trouble, Dee.”

Donnie didn’t answer him. “I’m busy, can’t talk.”

“Donnie, we didn’t talk about what happened the last time the Purple Dragons were in the picture, and I can’t let you slide away again.”

“That was by design. I’m not discussing this.”

“I don’t care you you talk to, just that you talk to someone. What—What about April?”

“Why the hell do you think I’d go over this with April? With anyone?”

“So, what? You’re just gonna repress the shit out of everything and not deal with it?”

“And here I was worried that I would have to explain it in excruciating detail.”

“Donnie—”

“Discussion over.”

“Can we just—”

“Over.”

Leo looked, helpless, at Raph, hoping he could swoop in and fix the problem. Raph couldn’t though, this was beyond even Raph. He didn’t know how to break the wall Donnie rapidly built between them. What was he going to do? Bring a sledgehammer down on it? Rip the controller out of his hand, rob Donnie of the choice like Kendra had tried to rob him?

Donnie’s hands were shaking on the controller. He paused as if taking a breath in a marathon, taking in air.

“Can I do anything?” Leo asked. He couldn’t be sure if he was asking for himself or for Donnie.

“…Moon Lord,” said Donnie.

“Huh?”

“Moon Lord. I need to fight the Moon Lord to get…I need more materials. Grab a controller.”

“Sounds like a four-turtle job.”

Donnie’s head dipped a little. His eyes were wide, unseeing.

“Feels like we could use two extra hands if we’re gonna go ham on the Moon Lord,” said Leo. “Teamwork makes dreamwork, am I right?”

Donnie nodded and didn’t stop. He set his controller down and squeezed Leo’s knee, rubbing a sleeve over his eyes. Raph gave Leo a thumbs up and left to grab Mikey, and when he was gone and when Donnie pulled back his arm, his eyes were perfectly dry, devoid of the miserable ache that had been there before. Wherever it had gone, Donnie had burned and buried it in a place that no one, not even Leo, could hope to touch.

#bad things happen bingo #rottmnt #rottmnt donnie #rottmnt leo #rottmnt mikey #rottmnt raph #this one really is a bad things happen #please please read responsibly #nimble writes

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sketchesandcoolart · 4 years ago

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Old and New Friends (ROTTMNT Fanfic)

Chapter 1

April O’Neil was in her bedroom with a forlorn look on her face. Today was a sad day for her, (even through it happened five years ago and should’ve gotten over it by now). She took out a box titled, “Me and my Best Friend”, from under her bed.

The African-American teenage girl opened it and saw that it still contains old photos of what looks to be a younger version of herself and a boy with black hair and tanned skin.

“I can’t believe how long it’s been,” She sighed, sadly. “I bet he forgot about me by now.”

She walked out and head to the living room, carrying the box. Mayhem, her pet cat/dog hybrid, was napping on the couch. She plopped down, waking and slightly scaring him up in the process.

“Oh, sorry little buddy.” April put the box down and pet his fur in an effort to calm him down. He purrs and laid on her lap, causing her to chuckle a bit. Mayhem was often the one to always keep her company whenever her parents are not around or when she wasn’t with her friends.

And by “friends”, they meant four certain mutant turtles. There was also Sunita, the slime yokai she befriended at school, while disguised as a human teenager of course.

“April... hey April!” a familiar voice, along with a tapping sound, was heard outside the window. April turned around to see Mikey knocking on the glass.

She goes over to open the window, seeing the turtles and Sunita. “Hey, what are you guys doing here? You do know at this time my mom and dad would be coming back from work, right?” Ever since they became friends, she kept it from her parents, fearing that they might freak out and forbid her from seeing them again.

“We know, we were just coming back from the Hidden City to buy some cloaking devices for ourselves, and we wanted to make sure you were okay. You’ve been kinda down lately,” Raph explained. “We even convinced Sunita to tag along just to cheer you up.”

“Yeah, if there’s anything bothering you, you can tell us,” the slime yokai added. “We’re your friends.”

“Thanks, guys... but really, I’m okay,” April said, reluctantly.

“Oh, c’mon! It’s not like we’ll tell anyone,” Leo protested. “You can’t keep it a secret forever, April.”

“As much as I hate to admit it... but Leo is right,” Donnie answered, rolling his eyes. The red-eared slider gives his purple-cladded brother a annoyed look.

“We won’t leave unless you tell us,” Mikey sing-songed. “We brought pizza just for the heck of it.” He holds up two boxes of pizza in his hands.

April sighed in defeat and gestured them to come inside. She knew that they would asking and insisting no matter what. But at the same time, she was glad to have friends like them. (Plus, she also can’t say “no” to good pizza).

And it was also time to tell them about her first friend.

*I had mentioned that before the final four episodes of “Rise of TMNT”, I had my own thoughts and opinions about Casey Jones and Karai in my previous posts; which were Casey being April’s childhood friend and Karai still being a high-ranked ninja.*

*Rise of TMNT and their characters belong to Nickelodeon.*

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fanfic-inator795 · 6 years ago

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RotTMNT Oneshot: Mission: Normalcy

(Also on AO3 if you want to leave a kudos/comment)

Plot: It was meant to be a simple undercover mission, that was all. Something she could absolutely handle, despite her senseis' concerns. Still, being subtle and laying low was never exactly Foot Recruit's strongest skill, and while she may be able to complete a successful mission, she still can't get in and out without a certain pigtailed cashier noticing her. Then again, this may not be a bad thing...

((I HAVE BEEN WANTING TO WRITE THIS FOR SO LONG!! Unfortunately, work and ideas for my drabble series got in the way. STill, I'm happy to finally post this ^v^ As long as Foot Recruit is a teen (I'm pretty sure she is, canon hasn 't said otherwise), I will happily support the AprilxFoot Recruit pairing, and I really hope we get to see these two interact in the show ^v^ ...hopefully not while Recruit is trying to also kill the turtles, lol. Anyway, hope you all enjoy!))

The pristine, fairly clean space around her was her battlefield.

The shops? Lookout towers, where suspicious eyes were sure to be watching her every move.

The officers that rolled by on their miniature set of wheels? They were soldiers, ones that she could easily fight physically but still couldn’t afford a battle with.

The citizens who strolled by? At worst, they were in the way. Crowding the long, tiled halls and making any rushed escape nearly impossible, just by how slow witted and slow moving they were. BUT , at best, they would be her camouflage.

And her? She was a lone warrior, standing among the crowds and staring down her surroundings with determination and silent fury in her eyes, her new ‘uniform’ neat yet flowing. Unlike her typical gi, her pastel pink jacket and medium length purple sundress hid her muscles and multiple hidden shuriken well. This combined with the long, dark wig on her head made her look like just another foolish seventeen year old, there to gawk at wares and buy things she didn’t need.

The Foot Recruit took another deep breath, straightening her position even more. Despite the occasional looks from the people walking past, she did not flinch. Even the occasional flick of water from the fountain behind her couldn’t cause her to lose her edge or her focus. This was her mission… She could do this! Prove her worthiness! ‘I shall not fail again!’ she thought to herself.

And with that (as well as the mall directory that she had studied meticulously) in mind, she left her surveillance point and began to ‘stroll’ down the mall path. Each step was firm, her heel coming down like a dagger into an enemy, her fists holding still by her sides. Again, she received a couple curious looks, but none of her fellow shoppers stopped to confront her directly. Excellent, her cover look was working!

‘I knew Sensei had no reason to worry!’ she smiled, ‘Just as I told him!’ Yes, they may have only been her second solo mission, and sure ‘subtle’ and ‘stealth’ weren’t exactly her strongest skills, but she still had this completely under control! Brute always seemed to worry too much about her anyway, something she had used to taken offense with until she’d heard him gushing about her skills to another soldier. Clearly he knew she was capable, he just had a habit of being a bit too caring when it came to his student.

...Recruit refused to say so aloud but, she didn’t exactly mind this.

But her other sensei, the Lieutenant, trusted her completely, even after her last (technical) failure. All he had said before sending her on her way was that she needed to remember: Blending in was the key. Get in, get the information we need, and get out. Frankly, it was almost too simple.

‘But nevertheless important,’ Recruit reminded herself. Another artifact was on the line, and after her senseis’ successful robbery at Gilbert’s Department Store, other high end stores in New York had tightened up their security. But that would not stop the Foot Clan, not as long as she had anything to say about it!

Recognizing a couple of the shop signs from the map, the Recruit increased her pace, scanning the area until she saw it. A small- ...Well, she wasn’t quite sure of the word for it. Spiritual seemed fairly appropriate, but also completely wrong. There was incense and small stone statues of Buddha and other gods, but also tacky dragon and wizard statues and long glass bottles that Recruit knew weren’t just for display. She sneered at the tacky shop.

Still, despite it’s more… controversial wares, there were still plenty of expensive items in the shop, ones that the moronic people running the shop thought were just highly collectible decorative pieces, and were simply placed on a shelf behind the counter, their true power and potential remaining unknown…

‘The Foot shall take over this world,’ Recruit smirked, ‘And most of these idiots won’t even see it coming…’ She made a move to step towards the shop - and froze. Once again, the words of her higher ranking sensei echoed through her head.

Blending in was the key…

Even the most unobservant shopkeeper would notice a person staring at their more expensive items and searching for security measures. “Ugh…” No, she couldn’t afford to draw ANY suspicion! Not until she got the information she needed for her clan and completed her mission! Even if she could escape the shop before any mall cops could be called to confront her, there was still a chance that her actions could lead to even more countermeasures being installed before the robbery took place, making her mission completely pointless! No, worst than pointless, because it would hurt her senseis’ plans rather than help them!

Recruit growled. This was why she preferred battles and combat-focused missions over stealth! Why did she have to follow all these ridiculous social rules when it would be SO MUCH EASIER to just run in there and crush all the security cameras and hidden alarms with her own to hands?!

“...Mama? Why is that girl growling?”

Recruit snapped her head at the accusing voice, her glare sharpening as she bared her teeth. The toddler whimpered, and with a small glare of her own, the mother quickly picked the child up and walked away.

“...Right,” Recruit sighed. Blending in. Staying undercover. She couldn’t do this her way, she had to follow mission protocol - and show her larger sensei that he had nothing to worry about. Show that she could handle a stealth mission just as well as she could handle taking on four tallking turtles in a hand-to-hand battle.

So, it was back to observation. She scanned her surroundings, making sure to focus especially on her fellow teenagers. Most of them were looking at their phones, laughing at some ridiculous meme or listening to some sort of audio. She did have a throw-away phone on her, one that would certainly make her look more casual (more-so than talking into her mystic crystal would, at least)… But no, she had to save her battery, just in case she was captured. A few teens had shopping bags hanging off their forearms… She would certainly look like a typical customer with those.

Recruit shook her head. No, that wouldn’t do at all. She only had a small sum of money on her person, and she didn’t want to slow herself down with useless weight. Besides, wouldn’t having large, open bags on her make her look more suspicious, possibly causing the shopkeeper suspect that she could be looking for things to shoplift?

She was starting to get frustrated once again when she saw it, the last piece of her disguise that she had been missing! A bright, medium sized orange cup with a straw that she could absentmindedly sip on and look just as casual and non threatening as any other teenager in the mall! She laughed quietly to herself. “Excellent…” It really was perfect.

Luck seemed to be on her side, it would seem, since there was an Orange Julius just a couple shops away with only a small line. A small smirk still on her face, Recruit strolled towards it and got in line. She eyed the people now in her personal space, but again most of them were either on their phones or chatting with other people in line. “Hehe…” Completely blended in.

She counted off the seconds she had to weight in her head, her eyes still glancing around to make sure there were no mall cops or more suspicious toddlers coming her way. Before long, it was her turn at the counter. “Hey there,” the cashier smiled. She was a dark-skinned girl with red framed glasses, her curly hair put up in matching pigtails. A simple name tag hung from her apron, stating the word “ April ”. Friendly, pleasant looking… Recruit could understand why she was assigned this job. “What can I get ya?”

Recruit opened her mouth, and nothing came out. Unbelievable… She had been focusing so much on her surroundings that she hadn’t even bothered looking at the menu! “I will, be deciding in just a moment!” she managed to get out. Her eyes darted towards the larger-than-expected menu above them, but the voice of the cashier brought them back down.

“I’d recommend the orange smoothie, myself,” the cashier offered, “Definitely a classic that most people will enjoy.”

“Then I will take one average sized orange smoothie drink,” Recruit replied (though it was more like a command). “...Please and thank you.”

The cashier nodded. “One smoothie, comin’ up.” The machine worked fast, producing a cupful of frothy orange liquid within a minute. “$3.70 please,” she told her when she returned with the cup, poking a straw into its top.

Recruit nodded back at her and took out her change purse from her jacket pocket. Quickly and efficiently, she took out a neatly folded twenty dollar bill and presented it to the girl behind the counter, who just continued to smile at her. Either she was just as observant as the rest of the citizens of New York, or she simply didn’t mind Recruit’s tone. Or, perhaps it was just her job to be polite. It was most likely the third option, Recruit told herself.

The cashier accepted the bill, and as she ducked into the register, Recruit grabbed the cup and walked away as briskly as she could, taking a couple sips along the way. ...It was admittedly a pretty good smoothy, but she would focus on that later. She had wasted enough time, she had to begin the next stage of her mission. So without another moment of hesitation, Recruit walked into the shop with her smoothy in hand, and her phone at the ready…

...In highsight, maybe she had overestimated the dedication and vigilance of the shopkeepers.

She had spent an hour wandering around the small shop, staring at cameras and possible trigger spots, taking the occasional picture, and sipping her smoothie. She had done all this, and the apathetic 20-something barely even looked at her, instead focusing on his magazine. The only interaction they had was when he asked in a completely uninterested tone if she needed help finding anything, clearly not caring about the answer.

Recruit had still ended up buying a small package of incense, just in case the cashier was simply playing dumb in order to trick her into making a mistake. At least now she could claim she was in fact a paying customer if anyone confronted her about her time spent there.

Not wanting the information to be lost if someone were to ambush her on her way back to the base, Recruit took a moment to text all her information and photos to her senseis. She received a reply from her lieutenant within a few seconds.

“Excellent work, recruit! It looks like your mission was a total success, and for this, you shall be accompanying us tomorrow night when we steal the artifact!” But before she could put her phone away, she received a second text. “Brute says good work too.”

Recruit smiled. “Hai. Thank you, senseis,” she typed, finally relaxing. Her mission was officially a success, and her senseis were pleased. Now, all she had to do was make her way out of the mall, and-

“Hey! Uh, excuse me!” a voice called in the distance.

Recruit spun around. She had expected a mall cop, or even another shopkeeper. But instead, she saw the cashier from the Orange Julius, waving at her from behind the counter before racing out of the smoothie shop and towards her.

She could feel the handle of her shuriken sliding down into her palm, but she fought the urge to grip it. A fight would cause unwanted attention and suspicions… She couldn’t drop the ‘normal teenage girl’ act yet, not now! Still, Recruit raised the rest of her defenses, curious as to what this girl wanted with her, seeing as she had already successfully made her payment. Interrogation, perhaps?

“Hey!” the girl said, only a bit breathless as she slowed her pace, “Glad I caught ya! And my shift was just ending too! Heh, talk about good timing, huh?”

“What is it you want?” Recruit demanded, her tone coming out just a tad harsher than she had intended, judging by the girl’s reaction.

“You uh… Your change.” Reaching into her pocket, the girl pulled out several bills and coins. “You forgot your change earlier. I was getting it for ya and, well, you just kind of left.”

“Oh.” Right, of course. “Thank you,” Recruit nodded, accepting the change.

“Yeah, no problem,” the girl smiled, “Heh, with how expensive things are, every little bit counts, right? I’m just glad I was able to give it back to you before headin’ home.” She glanced away for a moment, holding onto her arm. “So, yeah… Glad I could help.”

“Yes…” Still staring and watching her, Recruit tilted her head a bit. So… she wasn’t going to confront her, she was just being nice? A bit unexpected, but not necessarily unwanted. “Thank you,” Recruit nodded, finally breaking the slightly awkward silence, “Your honorable actions are appreciated.” She then gripped the empty cup slightly. “And, your smoothie was very delicious.”

“Heh, oh, really? Well, it’s not my recipe but, thanks!” she smiled, “I’m glad you enjoyed it. Oh, my name’s April, by the way.”

“Yes. I can see that, according to your name tag.”

April cringed slightly, resisting the urge to facepalm. “Oh, right, duh. So uh, what’s your name?”

Recruit - Yuu - froze, though only for a moment. “Rinko,” she lied, using the first name that popped into her head. Even if her secret identity wasn’t exactly one of high status or fame, she still felt the need to protect it for both her and her clan’s sake. Only her senseis used her real name, and she wanted to keep it that way.

“Rinko,” April repeated, “That’s a nice name."

“Thank you, April is a satisfactory name as well.” April just gave a small giggle at that, falling back into casual friendliness. It was, once again, unexpected. This April didn’t really stare at her like other citizens did. If she thought Recruit was in any way out of the ordinary, she didn’t wear it on her face. Or, maybe she did think so, but didn’t mind it. “I… need to be going now,” Recruit said suddenly, “My sen- fathers are at home waiting for my return.”

“Ah, right. Yeah, I’m gonna be heading home soon too, once I grab my stuff,” April nodded, though her smile dimmed a bit, “But, hey, see you around!”

Recruit paused, her body in mid-step. She met April’s eyes, and with a slightly softer tone, she replied with “I will, and I wish you the same,” choosing to ignore the second part of the girl’s goodbye. Not sparing another word or glance her direction, Recruit walked away. Still, her hands were relaxed as she walked, staying flat rather than folding up into fists once more. That… wasn’t too aggravating of an interruption, she admitted to herself.

Still, as well as her disguise had worked, she was not an ordinary teen girl. She still had her duties to complete, training to finish before the day was up and another mission to prepare for. She just didn’t have time for unimportant activities like ‘hanging out’.

...Though, that didn’t necessarily stop her from thinking about it.

----------------

Recruits didn’t receive many days off, though with how skilled she was, Yuu could afford a couple extra ones - especially since she normally found herself training or sparring with some hopeless grunt anyway despite not being required to.

And yet, here she was, once again walking amongst the fools of the city. This time, she was wearing a garnet long-sleeved shirt and black pants. Still not quite as nice as her gi, but a bit more comfortable than a dress while still being inconspicuous, at least (even if the wig on her head still made her scalp itch).

Part of her couldn’t help but be annoyed with herself, wondering why on Earth she’d drag herself back to a place like this willingly. Even if it was the setting of her clan’s latest victory, despite the efforts of those disgusting turtles, it was still a place that offered nothing but time-wasting activities and near-useless appliances. But another part of her, well… That part was annoyed for a different reason.

The cashier at the Orange Julius, now a slightly younger, acne-covered fifteen year old boy, glanced back up at her. Recruit glared back at him, forcing his nervous gaze back to the customer he was serving. The Recruit then sighed. “I knew this was a ridiculous idea…” She had wasted enough time here.

“...Um, excuse me?” A familiar voice spoke up. Recruit turned around.

The expression on the girl’s face when from cautiously curious to a full-on grin. “Hey, I thought it was you! It’s Rinko, right?”

“Yes, that is my name,” Yuu said quickly, remembering her cover, “And I remember you as well, April.”

“Heh, cool, cool,” April nodded. Her smile faltered a bit, though at her own not exactly ‘cool’ words than anything Recruit was doing. “So, you plannin’ on getting another smoothie, or-?”

Recruit considered her answer. “I was thinking about it.” She looked at April’s outfit, this time a yellow shirt with a green jacket and black tights. “You’re not working today then?”

“Nope,” April shook her head, “In fact, I’m kiiiinda not going to be working there ever again. I got fired.”

Recruit narrowed her eyes, suddenly looking much more like her warrior-self. “On what grounds? From my experience, you performed your serving duties perfectly? What reason could your superiors have to terminate you?!”

Not at all bothered by the other girl’s tone, April just sighed. “Ask my brothers. On my last shift, they came in after hours and uh, things got a bit crazy.” That may have sounded like she was throwing her brothers under the bus, but she didn’t really know how to explain an instance where her brothers (who just so happened to be four mutant turtles) tried to chase a giant, smoothie loving mutant-silverfish out of the shop for her and ended up accidentally smashing everything in the process in a ‘normal’ way. And she miiiight have done a bit of smashing of her own when she decided it was a good idea to grab a chair from the small employee sitting area, hoping to hit the creature, only to break the chair itself.

“It’s fine, not the first time it’s happened, and it’s not like I wanted to stay there for a long time anyway.” Still, finding a new job was sure to be a pain, one that she wasn’t in the mood to endure at the moment. “So, I’m just here browsing and walking around, killing some time cause I was bored.”

“Ah. It’s for the best, then, I suppose.” Recruit looked down at April’s outfit again. “Green suits you more than orange does, if that also helps.”

April grinned, chuckling. “Thanks, I appreciate that.” Yuu didn’t smile back at her, but her gaze did soften a bit. It would seem April’s laugh was just as nice as her smile. “...Hey, so,” April began again, her own expression now a mix of hopeful and cautious, “If you’re not here for anything specific, would you wanna maybe hang out? Together? I-I mean, you don’t have to if you wanna just hang out by yourself - totally nothing wrong with hanging out by yourself! I was just, you know, offering. And uh, yeah…” She cringed again. Ugh. Why was it that she could talk to mutants no problem but was a total disaster when it came to talking to other humans? It didn’t exactly help thay Rinko was so cool looking, and nothing at all like the other kids at her school (especially given that she actually remembered April’s name…).

Recruit stared back at her. She hadn’t threatened her, yet April seemed almost nervous around her. But, not in a distrusting or suspecting way, like she knew ‘Rinko’ wasn’t who she seemed. No, instead it was a type of nervousness that, in a way… Yuu could also understand. After all, there was a reason why joining a clan of ancient monks who only judged based on merit and skill was so appealing to her. “I… believe I would enjoy hanging out with you,” she said slowly, tightening her fists but forcing herself to keep eye contact, “So, I accept your invitation. But only for a couple hours.” Couldn’t let herself get too involved after all.

Still, that was enough for April. “Great!” she grinned, “That’s, that’s great! Yeah, we can find something to do for a couple hours. Um… Have you been to the arcade on the third floor yet? They’ve added a few more games.”

“I have not,” Recruit answered. So, that’s where they went.

The silence between them was still a bit awkward as they walked, but not yet suffocating. April kept up with Recruit’s strong pace well, and only further impressed her once she demonstrated her skills on one of the virtual fighting games.

The ice had officially been broken sometime between Recruit recalling the very happy memory of how she defeated a student in her ‘class’ three years older than her when he refused to stop insulting her and April sharing the story about how she got in a fight with some girls from her rival middle school softball team and won despite being completely outnumbered, proud to reveal that she had some moves of her own. By the time they got to the wack-a-mole machines, competing to see who could get the higher score, they were getting along like old friends.

Recruit didn’t try to hold back her boasts or her victorious laughter whenever she won again, something April found both entertaining and, admittedly, a bit adorable. Whenever April snarked or offered a clever comment to someone staring at them, her nerves no longer tying a small part of her down, Recruit couldn’t help but admire her fierce spirit along with her words.

Two hours turned to three, then four with a quick stop at a frozen custard place on their way out. By the time they exchanged numbers and went their separate ways, the bright lights of the city were coming on as the sun slowly set. Still, even with a whole day gone without a single moment of actual training, Recruit couldn’t help but feel satisfied.

She would always be a warrior. She would always be a member of the Foot Clan. This was her destiny, and this was what she wanted for her life, there was no denying this.

“But…” Recruit said to herself, staring down at April’s contact information down at her phone, memorizing it all with ease, “Perhaps there is room for… other things. For now.” She wouldn’t let herself get distracted, she would continue to work hard. But forming an alliance with this girl - this girl with strong grins and a warrior’s spirit of her own and bright laughter that could bring a smile to Yuu’s own face, her friendly nature and her strength just as evident as her beauty-

She stopped, blushing at her own ridiculous thoughts. “...Forming an alliance with her would, would be only a positive.” If April’s stories were true, she could certainly hold her own in a battle. Perhaps she could even be convinced to join the Foot. But until that opportunity came up, Recruit decided with a small smile that just hanging out with her on the occasional day off would be enough in the meantime - and she was certainly looking forward to it.

With newfound energy filling her, the Recruit darted into the growing shadows, disappearing without a trace...

Across town, deep in the sewers, April was having similar thoughts as she laid face down in one of her brother’s bed, excited yet completely flustered.

“I’ve finished my scans aaaaaand yep, she’s got it bad,” Donnie commented, causing April to groan into her pillow. Raph just patted her back, and glared at Leo when he started snickering again.

“What?” Leon said, smiling sheepishly, “I’m not trying to be mean, I just think it’s cute! It’s not every day someone in this family gets to go on a, what’d you call it, April? A ‘sort of date’ and gets a huge cruuuuuu-” His teasing was cut off by an action figure to the face, courtesy of April grabbing it off his nightstand.

“Girl, you have GOT to get pictures, next time!” Mikey told her, “I wanna see her! How cool did you say she was, again? Like, ‘most popular girl in school’ cool or ‘rebel biker chick’ cool?”

“ Definitely rebel biker chick,” April answered, lifting her head a little so her voice wasn’t as muffled. She knew that even when she first saw her in pastel pink. “Trust me, this girl was just as tough as she was cool. But…”

Mikey smirked, remembering the other little detail his sis had given them. “Uh huhhhhh… And remind me, just how cute and pretty was this girl?” April just groaned again.

Donnie shook his head. “Fellas, I think we’ve officially reached ‘useless lesbian’ status.” April kicked at him, but he and the rest of her brothers could only laugh.

Okay, so maybe she was a little head-over-heels but, hey, she was April O’Neil, and she deserved to have a fun afternoon out with a cool, tough, gorgeous girl, right? Maybe Rinko was a bit strange when it came to some of her quirks, but it wasn’t as if she was rude or even THAT weird. April just had a good feeling about her, and if their next ‘sort of date’ was as fun as this one had been, then she definitely couldn’t wait for it. ...If she could work up the nerve to ask for one, that is. Honestly, she just hoped that she’d be able to initiate a text conversation without chickening out.

Still, she had a good feeling about this… And maybe if she was lucky enough, they’d get close enough and open enough for April to feel safe introducing her to her family outside of just her father and aunt. But in the meantime, April was just going to try and enjoy whatever time she got to spend with her.

She thought of Rinko’s rare smile, and closed her eyes with a blissful sigh. Just getting to see that again - to smile and laugh along with her - was enough motivation for her to at least try.

“Oh yeah,” she heard Leo say, his voice full of amused affection, “She’s definitely got it bad.” The other turtles nodded, and silently wished her the best of luck, both with winning this girl’s affection and with avoiding crazy mutants or weird flame-heads while on their dates.

THE END

#rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #foot recruit #april o'neil #oneshot #my writing #fanfiction #dark nickelodeon show me the forbidden cute battle-ready lesbians content

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fanfic-inator795 · 6 years ago

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RotTMNT Oneshot: Knitting Needles Make Good Conversation Starters

Summary: How does the so-called 'angry one' of the family become not so angry? Simple. With a few good coping mechanisms, and a lot of help and support from his family.

((Heyyyyy. This is my newest RotTMNT story, pretty much just focusing on Raph and sorta trying to explain why he isn’t as angry in TMNT!2018 as he is in other incarnations. Also plenty of family fluff, cause I love this turtle family ^v^ Anyway, I posted a link to this story on AO3 yesterday but I decided to just post the whole story here on Tumblr too. Anyway, hope you all enyoy - and thank you to all the people who have commented on the story already! ^v^))

“Chōsen o hajimeru tokidesu! Kare wa atarashī kuruma ni katsu koto ga dekimasu ka? Mitsukemashou! Sasori o hanashi nasai!”

Splinter sighed. Not even the amusing sight of the newest Scorpion Treadmill contestant stepping up to the machine for what was sure to be a spectacular failure could bring a smile to his furry face. Television had proven to be a worthy distraction from the more difficult parts of his new life, but at the moment it couldn’t even do that, for there were heavier things weighing on the rat’s mind than simply remembering to gather food and wondering whether they would need to prepare for bad weather.

Out of the corner of his eye, he could still see his oldest sitting in the cramped corner that had been assigned to him. Raphael had brought his knees up to his chest, scowling as he hugged them, with his fists still covered in stray streaks of various colors. Just a few days ago, he had been sent to the corner for shoving Leonardo when he tried to get him to play tag with them. A day or so after that, he had been sentenced to the corner once more for stomping on one of Donatello’s gadgets - an act that still hadn’t been forgiven, since Donnie still refused to speak to him.

His latest misdeed was only half an hour ago, when Splinter had been dragged away from preparing lunch by a yelling pair of twins and a sobbing Michelangelo to the scene of the crime. In mere seconds, Raph had crushed all of Mikey’s chalk in his tiny yet strong hands, leaving them as nothing more than colorful crumbs on the stone floor.

Needless to say, something had to be done - and more time in the Naughty Corner just wasn’t going to cut it. Holding back another tired sigh, Splinter turned off the tv and walked over to his son. Raph’s scowl deepened, and he attempted to hide his face. Splinter raised a gentle hand and put it under Raph’s chin, lifting his face out of his knees.

“Why did you break Orange’s chalk?”

Raphael quickly gave his favorite answer. “I dunno.”

His father narrowed his eyes. “That is not an answer. Why did you break them?”

“I said I dunno!” the five year old snapped, baring his teeth. Splinter was VERY thankful his son hadn’t grown his adult snapper teeth yet, though his hand still retreated, just in case. But the rat wasn’t about to completely back down just yet.

“Why must we keep having these talks, Red Child?” Raph just growled, hiding his face once again. “If something is bothering you, you must tell me!” Splinter continued, scowling back at him, “You cannot keep acting like this. You cannot be a bully to your little brothers-!”

“I’m NOT a bully!” Raphael screamed back at his father’s face suddenly, “An’ I broke his crayons cause they were stupid, okay?!” With that, he turned the spikes on his shell towards Splinter and hid the rest of him against the wall.

Splinter pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to ignore his oncoming headache. He knew that choosing to raise children - mutant turtle children, especially - would present plenty of problems and difficulties, but his oldest’s ever increasing temper tantrums were something else entirely!

“You will stay here for another ten minutes, understand?” Having nothing else to say, Splinter returned to his chair, though kept the tv off as to not give his son a chance to escape under the noise of a live studio audience. As the seconds ticked by, the boy’s growls and angry mutters turned to sniffling and quiet sobs - and just like that, Splinter felt his frustrations melt into heartache.

He had to fix this… He had to help his son.

()()()()()()()()()()()()

Even while being only at the tender age of five, Raphael had done a ton of traveling in his life. Through abandoned alleyways and dark sewers, along train tracks and up and down piles of trash in dumps. Even after being lucky enough to finally find a home deep in New York’s sewer system, Raph still considered traveling to simply just be a part of his family’s life.

But that was the thing… His family’s life. He always traveled with his father and his dumb younger brothers. But now, it was just his father while his brothers got to stay home and sleep in. Splinter didn’t explain why, just that this was a trip for just the two of them. Raph didn’t think they were abandoning his brothers… Maybe Splinter was getting ready to abandon him, finally having enough of him being mean and naughty. Well fine, he didn’t need a papa anyway! He would be just fine by himself!

...Besides, if this place would be his new home, it didn’t seem like it’d be too bad. It was missing the usual smells from the dumps and alleyways, and it was much brighter even with the sun only just poking over the horizon. Pink skies shone light down on darkened trees while wet grass tickled at his feet. He remembered one night a few months ago when Splinter had first brought all of them to a similar looking place, calling it a ‘park’. He and his brothers had played there practically all night, but Raph knew that there would be no playing this time.

After a few more minutes of walking, Splinter finally stopped. He sat down, and then gestured for his son to do the same. Raph did so, if only to get off his feet for a bit. He still didn’t like the wet grass too much, how it stuck to his legs and his shell. But the light skies and the cool morning winds that gently brushed past his face helped him feel less antsy about it.

��Do you like this place?” Splinter asked him suddenly. Raph hesitated a moment before nodding. “I do as well… It is very quiet, and very relaxing.” Raph nodded again, though still scowled slightly, not quite understanding the point of all this.

Lifting his strong tail, Splinter wrapped it around his son’s shoulders, pulling him a bit closer. “Raphael,” he began, his voice strong. Raph clenched his fists, knowing very well by now that his papa only seemed to use their full names when he was really angry with them. He knew this trip wasn’t going to be fun! He just brought him out here to yell at him some more! He just-!

“I am sorry for calling you a bully.”

The young snapper blinked. He looked up, and saw the guilt in the old rat-man’s eyes. “I was frustrated with your behavior, but that was still wrong of me, and I am sorry.”

“...Okay,” Raph said quietly, not really sure what else to say.

“Always remember this, Raphael,” Splinter told him, his tone serious once more, “That even when you do bad things or make mistakes, you are not bad, and I will love you even when you do these things.”

Raph’s eyes widened a bit. “Really…? So, so you won’t ever get rid of me for bein’ bad?”

“Of course not!” His tail brought the boy in closer, and Raph didn’t hesitate to hold onto him, gripping the fabric of Splinter’s robe tightly. He was big enough for his head to fit in the crook of Splinter’s neck, but he still crouched down, wanting to feel small in his papa’s safe arms. “I did not get rid of you or your brothers when you were hatchlings, and I will not be doing so anytime soon! I love you, Big Red, no matter what you do.”

Raph sniffled at the pet name. “Okay, Papa… Okay…” He felt a soft hand pet his head a few times before hearing his father continue.

“However… While I will not abandon you for making mistakes or doing bad things, these things still must be dealt with. I brought you out here, Red, because I wanted you to feel relaxed enough to talk to me about the things that are making you angry, without worrying about your brothers hearing about it. So… Will you tell me? Will you tell Papa why you get so angry with your brothers and break their things?”

Raph didn’t answer right away, but Splinter had already figured that would be the case. Still, he didn’t push his son. He just continued to pet him and hold him close, until a small voice finally began to speak.

“I broke Mikey’s chalk cause they’re stupid,” Raph mumbled, repeating what he had said just a few hours before, “I try to draw with ‘em, and they always break… Everything they wanna play with breaks when I use ‘em, and then they get mad and then I get in trouble! Same goes with when I wanna play with them!” He started to growl, clenching his teeth. “I... I know I can’t be rough with Donnie ‘cause of his shell, but Leo and Mikey got regular shells and I still end up hurtin’ em whenever we play! An’ then I get mad, so I break more stuff an’ I don’t care about hurtin’ people, ‘cause it’s always gonna happen no matter what! I try not to, but it still happens!”

Splinter started to feel the front of his robe become damp, but he just held his son tighter, silently letting him know that it was okay. That he was okay. “Why do I have to be the biggest, Papa?” Raph cried, “Why do I have to be big and spiky and everything else small and break-y? It’s not fair! It’s not fair! ”

Splinter shushed Raph as he began to sob. “It will be alright, Red… I promise it will all work out.” Wanting to help calm him down, Splinter began to tell him stories of warriors as big and fierce as grizzly bears, and of samurai as tall and mighty as oak trees. Stories of people as big and strong as Raphael, yet they didn’t break or smash or hurt. Instead, they saved .

By the time the sun had lifted itself above the green treetops, despite his cheeks still being damp and the occasional sniffle or two, Raph had started to think that maybe being big wasn’t so bad. “I wanna be like ‘em when I grow up,” he said quietly, still leaning on Splinter’s warm chest, “I wanna be like the warriors an’ the heroes… Be big enough to help.”

“You will be, Red Child,” Splinter told him, giving him another pat on the head, “And your brothers grow up too, become bigger and strong enough, and you’ll all have an easier time playing with each other.” Raph smiled a bit at the idea of that, being able to wrestling around with Leo and Mikey and being able to play with Donnie without worrying about hurting his soft shell. “But even then, you must remember that you are the oldest of your brothers. You still must protect them, just as they will protect you, and you definitely shouldn't use your strength against them in order to force them to do what you want. Family must always look after each other, and it is the oldest’s job to practice that, so that the younger members of his family can follow in example.”

The young snapper thought about this carefully before looking back up at his papa. “D’you think I could be a good big brother?”

“Absolutely,” Splinter answered with a warm smile. Raph grinned back at him, giving him another hug. Though, as they began walking back to the manhole they came up through, Raph’s smile faltered a bit.

“What if I still get mad, Pop?” he asked, “What if I get mad an’ I hurt my brothers or break their stuff, even though I don’t mean it?”

Splinter hummed, stroking his chin. “Perhaps… Perhaps, we can find a way for you to control your strength while we wait for your brothers to catch up…”

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Two days after their ‘Raph and Papa Only’ trip, as Raph had called it when his brothers had asked, Raph found himself being taken to his room rather than the Naughty Corner before he had a chance to crush the toy car that he had stepped on. There, he was presented with… With…

“Chopsticks?” Raph raised an eyebrow. “But Pop, I already ate, an’ I hate using those things anyway! Hands are wayyyy better to eat with!”

Splinter gave a small smirk as he shook his head. “No, Red, these are not chopsticks, please do not eat with them. ...Or eat them.” His oldest definitely had a habit of sticking things in his mouth, just to have something to munch on. “These are knitting needles. People use them to create clothes such as scarves, hats, sweaters, and even blankets.”

“Really?” Raph eyed the needles. How could two little sticks create all those things?! It was impossible!

“Yes, really. And that is what you are going to do.” Hidden within the sleeves of his robe, Splinter produced a package of red yarn (Raph smiled at the fact that they were using his favorite color, even if he was still confused) and a worn book titled “Knitting for Beginners”.

“But why do I gotta knit?” Raph asked, picking up the needles and clenching them together tightly. The needles began to crack slightly in his strong grip, causing Raph to scowl. He couldn’t make anything with dumb knitting needles, they were just another thing for him to break…

Splinter however was far from discouraged. “These will help you control your strength, as well as your temper. Knitting takes patience and time, and if you can master it, then you will be on your way to becoming a master of those things as well, my son.”

“A master…” Raph furrowed his brow, setting the needles down. “But what if I can’t do it? What if I’m bad at knitting and ruin all the yarn.”

“Then we will find something else to help you,” Splinter said suddenly, “But let us try to knit before we look for something else, alright?” “Fiiiine…”

For the next several weeks, Splinter would spend around two hours a day with Raphael, pouring over the details and tips from the knitting handbook while his son tried his hardest to knit. For the most part, Raph actually wasn’t too bad at it, being able to concentrate and not get too caught up on the occasional dropped stitch.

Unfortunately, this didn’t stop him from breaking at least one needle each session, but rather than scolding him for it, Splinter simply taped the tool up or replaced it within a few days if the damage was severe enough. Even while still feeling a bit guilty about it, the lack of pressure did allow Raph to relax a bit more, which led to fewer broken needles. Despite their occasional destructiveness, he found that he liked working with his hands, finding new ways to position them as he used them to create rather than just smash or hit.

After two months, Raph had completed a pair of red, three-fingered gloves. They weren’t as perfect as the pictures in the book, but they were still wearable. They were still his, and that was enough.

“Whoaaaa!” Leo said in awe, spotting them on his big brother’s hands as soon as he walked into the tv room, “Where’d you find those?”

“I didn’t, I made ‘em,” Raph answered proudly, “All by myself!” “Wowwwww!”

“Yes. Very nice, Red,” Splinter added, looking away from the screen and giving the gloves an approving nod, making his son beam.

“Yeah! But why’d you wanna make gloves?” Leo asked, “Seems like kind’a a weird thing to make.”

“‘Cause I was mad about steppin’ on your car,” Raph replied, shrugging, “but I made these instead of breaking the car.”

“Oh, whoops...” Leo winced slightly, remembering the short scolding he had gotten that day about leaving his toys out. “Sorry…”

“It’s fine, I’m not mad about it anymore.”

“Good, and thanks for not breakin’ it.” After admiring the gloves a bit more, Leo smiled. “You wanna go play now?”

Raph gave a toothy grin. “Yeah! Let’s go!”

The boys quickly scurried off, leaving their content - and very proud - father alone in his chair. Naturally, he still kept an ear out for crying or yelling, but it wasn’t until it was time to gather his sons up for supper did he have to get out of his chair. Not a toy was broken that night.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Most would be worried about leaving a four year old to their own devices, but Splinter was not one of those parents. Not because he didn’t care about the safety of his youngest, certainly not, but because he knew just how attached Michelangelo was to his older brothers, who would be sure to keep him out of trouble just as long as they stayed out of trouble themselves. And, if something was truly wrong, Splinter would definitely know about it, no matter how far away his orange son was.

Hence the loud wail that had Splinter out of his chair within seconds. Sometimes Splinter wondered if Mikey knew just how loud he could be. Frankly, it would not surprise him if people on the streets above and on the other side of the city could hear him…

But while a loud cry had made him move, a single phrase made him stop, just before reaching the playroom:

“I’m sorry!”

When only silence followed this, Splinter peeked inside, getting a full view of the situation while still using his ninja skills to stay out of sight. He could see Raph looking down at a broken toy train, but all Raph could see, even as he kept his eyes glued to the floor, was the expressions on his brothers’ faces. Mikey’s tear filled eyes, and Leo and Donnie’s frowns - with the latter looking more angry than hurt, which made sense considering that he had found the toy.

“I, I was just tryin’ to play with it,” Raph explained, “But I played too rough, an’ one of the wheels just popped off.” He clenched his fists a bit, though his expression stayed calm. “I didn’t mean to break it, an’ I tried to put it back on, but it wouldn’t go back on! So I threw it… and I threw it too hard.” Looking his brothers right in the eyes now, Raph let his guilt be known. “I was mad… But I still shouldn’t have thrown it. And the rest I didn’t mean to do. But I’m still really sorry. So… yeah.”

The twins exchanged a look, their own expressions softening just a little. But before either of them could say anything, Mikey rushed forward. Even being nearly half the size of Raph, Mikey still managed to wrap his arms halfway around him in a tight hug. “‘S’okay, Raphie,” he said, “I know you sorry, an’ s’okay. Don’t be sad, okay?”

“We know you didn’t mean it,” Leo added, giving Raph a small smile, “We’ll just fine stronger toys for all of us to play with, ones that never ever break!”

“And... I guess I could teach you how to fix the toys that do break,” Donnie offered, “If you wanna help.”

“...” Despite the unshed tears in his eyes, Raph smiled and nodded at them both. “Yeah… That sounds good.”

“You guys hug too!” Mikey demanded, and the twins both chuckled, happily obliging while Raph’s smile grew. Once the impromptu group hug ended, Donnie ran to the toy box to grab the small tools he had stashed away for situations such as these while Leo told a silly train joke he had heard on some cartoon show, easily making his red and orange brothers laugh.

And as he watched his oldest carefully take the tools, using the skills he had gotten from months of knitting to keep his hands steady and his grip not too firm while his other children gathered around their brother to give help and support, Splinter quickly decided that neither he nor Raphael had anything to worry about.

And as time went on and all the things that his father had promised began coming true, Raph decided this as well. Knitting became another one of the constants in his life, even as he himself grew bigger and stronger. Each new garment turned out better than the last, and by his tenth birthday, knitting wasn’t just an exercise in controlling his anger and strength, but a well-loved hobby!

His brothers grew up as well, all of them growing closer as they played and learned together. Once all of them began learning martial arts thanks to the discovery of Lou Jitsu movies and months of begging their father to teach them, they also all became great sparring partners. Sure, Raph still had to pull a few of his punches, not wanting to accidentally send any of his siblings through a wall, but no longer did he have to worry about making any of them cry just by shoving them, and together they were all able to begin the journey of becoming awesome ninjas.

Soon enough, strength truly became a symbol of, well, strength! Of being able to fight off bad guys, of being able to protect the ones he cared about the most. Once Splinter finally allowed them to go off into the city without his supervision, Raphael wore the title of protector and leader with pride. ‘Look out, NYC,’ he remembered thinking as he guided them all out of the sewers, ‘Big Brother Warrior Raph is comin’ for ya!’

Of course, even with all this positive change, Raph still occasionally felt his anger just below his surface. When he still accidentally broke something, as if he was still an accident prone five year old, or when his brothers annoyed him to the point where he actually did want to shove them through a wall. When he frustrated with being a mutant in a human world, or when something went wrong despite his best efforts to make them go right, or when he was just feeling angry in general and didn’t really know why.

Thankfully, just like how his father knew just what to do all those years ago, the rest of his family seemed to know how to help.

Donnie kept a collection of cracked beakers and gadgets damaged beyond repair in his lab, and when the time called for it, he and Raph would take them all and just smash them against the wall. It was a bit embarrassing to admit, but smashing stuff was still a pretty good release. Thankfully, Donnie never judged him for it - ‘Who knows, maybe he gets somethin’ out of it too,’ Raph would sometimes think - and the two of them would still end up talking things out as they swept up the mess.

Exercise was another way to get that release, though sometimes lifting weights or striking a punching bag just wasn’t enough. Leon, being the fastest of them, naturally would challenge Raph to a race through the sewers or a dozen spars in the dojo when his older brother was feeling particularly angry. He was more than happy to help tire Raph out as he worked through his emotions, just as he was happy to provide refreshing drinks and a shoulder to lean on afterwards.

Mikey’s solution was similar to Leo’s. Buried deep under the rest of his art and crafting supplies were several Jupiter Jim coloring books, each of them partially filled with plenty of pages left to go. He’d always bring these out, along with several plates of homemade snacks, whenever Raph needed a stress coloring session. As childish as it might have seemed, it was almost comforting in a way, just lying on the floor and coloring for as long as he needed to while his youngest brother talked about whatever. The fact that Mikey never even scowled at him when he accidentally snapped off the tip of a pencil or a crayon also helped.

Even Splinter, even after doing so much for him already, still offered to help when Raph’s anger nearly reached his limits. They’d have one-on-one wrestling matches, with Raph finding comfort in how impossible it seemed to knock his father down no matter how many attacks he threw at him. A pillar of true strength, as far as Raph was concerned. And, when it wasn’t a fight he needed in order to work things out, then Splinter would instead provide him with listening ears, honest words, and a warm cup of black tea.

It really was just as Splinter had promised that morning. Things really did work out in the end. His family loved him, no matter what he did or what emotions he had, and they were always willing to help. Even if his feelings were his own, Raph would never be alone, and he would be forever grateful for that.

...But even so, sometimes old habits were the best ones.

Still scowling, he dug through his basket of yarn. His hand touched a ball of pink yarn, and he quickly threw it against the wall of his bedroom. He definitely didn’t need anything pink tonight… Instead, he grabbed the green yarn and began knitting away. He growled slightly when he dropped two threads in a row, but kept his hands steady, resisting the urge to form them into fists. Instead, he took a deep breath and kept on it, listening to the click of his needles and letting his mind wander away from the fight he and his brothers had gotten into just a couple hours ago.

He was about halfway through his impromptu scarf when he heard a gentle knock at the door. “Hey, big guy,” April greeted, giving him a gentle smile.

Despite it all, Raph smiled back at his sister. “Hey… What are you doin’ here?”

“Well I was gonna hang, but the guys said you could maybe use some company? ...Said that you had kind of a rough night tonight?”

Raph scowled, though not at April. ‘Rough’ was certainly one way to describe it… Meatsweats had gotten his hands on a couple of strength-increasing mutants, which was giving him a huge advantage in his so called 'hunts'. Raph had been the one to accidentally lead them into such a one-sided fight, which in turn lead to all of them getting beaten up pretty badly.

But while they were able to free the rest of Meatsweats’ captured prey, making that part of Raph’s plan a success at least, the bad guy had still managed to get away even with their best efforts. Naturally, his brothers were just as frustrated with this, complaining about the mostly-failed mission most of the way home. So, not wanting to start a fight or bother them as they patched themselves up, Raph ended up isolating himself the moment they got home, lest he end up getting into a screaming match with one of them. Though, he had a feeling he wasn’t going to be alone for much longer.

“You wanna talk about it?” April asked, and watched her friend think about it before shaking his head. Tonight was just a bad night, and he wanted to forget about it as soon as possible, at least for right now. “Okay. Can I still chill here for a while?” That time, Raph nodded, not taking nearly as much time to answer. So, April took a seat next to him on his bed. She gently rubbed his shell as he worked, expertly avoiding the spikes and helping him fall back into a relaxed mindset - one that didn’t involve mutant pig-chefs or nearly suffocating thoughts of self doubt.

It took another hour before he finished the scarf, releasing a long sigh once he finally did. “It looks good,” April told him. He smiled warmly at the compliment and handed the scarf to her. She ran her fingers over the soft yarn as she wrapped it around her neck. She’d already gotten several scarfs from the snapper over the years, along with a couple sweaters and some fingerless gloves, but as far as she concerned, there was no limit on the amount of comfy homemade knitted-wear a person could have. “Thanks… So, you feelin’ better?”

“Yeah,” Raph admitted, though his smile didn’t quite meet his eyes, “I’m relaxed at least. Still kinda pissed though… I know I’ll get a rematch with him eventually but, it’s hard just waitin’ around, you know? Waitin’ to make up for a bad fight, or a bad plan…”

April patted him on the shoulder. “...Central Park seemed pretty deserted when I rode past it, and I doubt anyone’s out there at-” she checked her phone. “2:37 AM. You wanna go take a walk? Maybe grab some convenience store pizza afterwards?”

Raph’s smile grew a bit. Closing his eyes for just a moment, he could already feel the cool grass under his feet and the light wind in the air. “Yeah, that sounds nice… Thanks, April.”

“No problem, Raph,” she smiled back, squeezing his hand, “Anytime.”

Even before they reached the surface, Raph could feel the last of his anger and frustration fading away, allowing his heavy steps to feel light without anything weighing them down. Of course, these feelings would come back soon enough, and as annoying as that would be, Raph wasn’t afraid of them. He’d face them head on, just as he did with any other obstacle in his way. Things would work out in the end. Things would be alright.

As long as he had his family, their encouraging and supportive words, and a couple of spare knitting needles and some yarn at the ready, he knew he really would be just fine, anger issues and all.

THE END

#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt #tmnt 2012 #raphael tmnt #fanfiction #my writing #oneshot #I love the Raph Knits headcanon so much guys you don't even know

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