#should i tag jon and martin too

[earendilsass]

Colin is absolutely abt to murder the gay lil computer voices

[sparky-is-spiders]

Hi! I’m here suffering from lack of good Archivist!Sasha content as well 😭 On that note, do you have any fic on that topic you would recommend? Or just good Sasha fics in general, (or Jonsasha, if that’s your cup of tea)? Thank you in advance 😊

Tragically, I think there is a general dearth of good Archivist!Sasha content (and just about none of it Jonsasha content, as far as I can tell (and not only is Jonsasha my cup of tea, but the ONLY thing standing between it and the #1 OTP spot (currently occupied by JE) is the fact that the Jonsasha that I desperately crave exists in my brain and nowhere else)). Admittedly, I haven't looked very far into her tag yet (I should rectify that at some point tbh) but I've dug around the Jonsasha tag when I first got into it, and I know at least one fic where Sasha drifts towards Beholding through an interest in office gossip.

In terms of Jonsasha Ao3 has:

This very good Sasha lives fic where Jon shows up to Georgie's with an unconscious Sasha and everyone involved is very confused.

These two fics are cute also. The former is by @/suttttton and is them getting together, the latter is established Jonsasha from @/dickwheelie.

Eyevatar Sasha might actually be thinner on the ground (outside of fix-its where she solves everything and her canon reckless curiosity is completely ignored). Ao3 has:

This fic, which is Jongerry with outsider PoV Sasha. Just barely has the implication that she might be shifting towards the Eye (via prying into the lives of her coworkers) but gets a mention through sheer force of Excellent Sasha Characterization. I read this and I feel like I'm reading a fic from a Sasha Understander.

There's also this fic, which looks very promising but which I haven't actually gotten the chance to read yet, so I can't speak to its quality.

Unfortunately I've only gotten into Sasha fairly recently (especially as compared to Jon, who my brain latched onto in a deathgrip from the start), so I haven't gone through her tag yet. A scroll through the Archivist!Sasha or Beholding Avatar!Sasha tags pulls up a lot of fix-it and J//mart, which isn't really what I'm looking for from the concept. I'm sure there's more out there, and if/when I find them I'll come back to this ask probably, but I lucked into Reverse Nighthawks (I was on a Jongerry kick).

But god every day I wish that I could write romance and/or longfic, because about a year ago I read a Jonmichael fic that, when discussing alternate universes (where Jon ended the world) it's revealed that he once did an apocalypse out of love for his Archivist, Sasha James. And it was one (1) single line, but it struck me so hard because god. A perfect concept I think. The potential dynamics of Archivist!Sasha/Assistant!Jon are enthralling to me. Jon destroying the world (or helping her destroy the world? Cute date night I think: bringing about armageddon with your eldritch monster partner) for Sasha... anyway mostly I mentioned that one because My God if I have to live with that tantalizing AU rotating in the background of my mind 24/7 so do the rest of you.

[identityarchitect]

do i wanna know is literally the most blackwoodow song ever. like. "crawling back to you" and "maybe im too busy being yours to fall for somebody new" it is LITERALLY ABOUT THEM

[jazzically]

you guys get it

the fact that martin blackwood haters exist is so confusing to me like he's a bitch who moans and complains but also sets fire to things for fun and successfully manipulates avatars and gets jealous about the avatar of death waking up his boyfriend up from a coma and is both jon's staunchest defender and not afraid to call out jon's bullshit

[occudo]

So many AUs so little energy

and I can't decide help

Gertrude is still around au: Takes the longest, but I have around 5 more 'chapters' worth of text for them in my notes. I like the story, but I lack motivation for long comics rn

P & P TMA sigh... it's my guilty pleasure- and have a few more scenes/quotes I can draw with them... everyone looks good in coats.

Archivist!Georgie/ Podcaster!Jon More of this- everyone is in a different role, what happens with the plot? Who knows? Georgie and Melanie but office romance? Danny Stoker as an assistant? Jon streaming? Is there an apocalypse? Who knows?

Cozy Jmart fluff What it says on the tin- no end of the world, just fluff- maybe cats

Kid Jon (and Gerry and Eric)

The backstory for Jon and Gerry from the first au- how they met, embarrassing childhood stories? Their band? Oh, and Eric being their dad.

OG archive assistants Ghost Hunt UK Part of the Archivist!Georgie/ Podcaster!Jon au, but more focus on Martin, Tim, and Sasha and their youtube show.

Also- if you want a specific thing in these AUs (like Mike and Martin on a date 👀), you can definitely commission me on my kofi- just saying

[magnusmadness]

do you think martin reads fanfic as a guilty pleasure. as someone who would definitely be targeted by the lonely i think he would. solace in fictional people and all of that. and we know books aren’t off-limits to the lonely.

so anyways my point for this is do you think he ever scrolls through AO3 looking for different tags and slowly starts attributing them to the different entities

Martin: Jon, do you think this “hanahaki” thing belongs to The Lonely or The Corruption?

Jon: How should I know, I don’t even—The Corruption.

Martin: Yeah, yeah, that’s what I’m thinking too.

then later y’know you get something like

Martin: Hurt/comfort, angst, sexual conte—okay, okay, uh—cannibalism! Well, that’s obviously The Flesh.

Jon: Following “sexual content”?

Martin: Well—I didn’t write it.

Jon, alarmed: I’d certainly hope not.

i just think it’d be funny. jon’s doing some jon stuff and martin’s browsing fics for fandoms he’s never even heard of

[saintbleeding]

Hii~

So i saw this on a tumblr post but is very jonmartin

"Jon and Martin are planning their wedding, they want to have their cat as ring bearer (is this how it's called?) But Martin doesn't know the name of the cat because they always call it different nicknames and jon just doesn't tell him and he don't want to admit that after all that years don't know.

Because jon didn't know either! he thinks that the cat is Martin's and he also is trying to figure out the name."

Martin’s not a cat person.

Honestly, he’s just not really an animal person. Like, in general.

The same isn’t true for Jon, of course. On, like, their second date, Jon—who, up until that point, had been all leather elbow patches on his stupid tweed jackets and “hmm, perhaps” and thoughtful squinting—got approached by a cat in the street, and pretty much melted on the spot.

Martin melted, too, but for slightly different reasons.

So it wasn't really a surprise when Jon moved in and Cat started turning up. Sure, it felt a little bit out of character for Jon not to excitedly announce that, one, he'd gotten a pet cat really recently, and, two, he was bringing it into Martin's place, which is a relatively humble little cottage, but Cat seems to free-roam most of the time, so it's not like she's encroaching on much of the space. And, anyway, it's not like Martin hates cats, so he doesn't mind. He just sort of thought Jon would have said something. But he didn't.

So.

You know.

There's a cat.

She's grown on Martin over time. In fact, it's usually him that wakes up with her purring and headbutting him at fuck-off o'clock in the morning, and Jon's not a heavy sleeper, so if she'd attacked him first, Martin would know.

But she's nice. Lovely little tufts of fur between her toes, and quite a deep meow for such a pretty lady. He'll call her Lady Catherine sometimes, and Jon's got the gall to pretend he doesn't think it's hilarious. Mind you, Jon's terms of endearment for her skew a bit more—pejorative, for lack of a better term? Like, Cat will take the opportunity when Jon is hunched over a stack of student essays at the dining table, and she'll leap onto his shoulders, and do that loaf thing, and Jon always says "unhand me, you infernal creature", or the few times she has bothered Jon in the middle of the night for pre-dawn breakfast service, he's grumbled "vile beast" even as he gets up to feed her.

Martin's tried telling him he shouldn't be encouraging her. But Jon just turns around and says "yes, I know, that's why I chastise her".

Martin stays impressed that someone so smart can be so stupid. Which he means affectionately, obviously. If he didn't, they wouldn't be getting married.

Which is great, by the way. It's great.

Does present some—unique problems, though.

Martin's got absolutely no bloody clue what her actual name is.

Which, you know, it's not like he's filling out adoption papers or anything, but at some point after some late-night banter it became part of the plan that Cat should be the ring-bearer at the wedding.

And he can't not know the name of a member of the party at his own wedding.

So he starts sleuthing.

"Hey," he says one evening, when GBBO is over and they're just sitting there with the telly on mute.

Jon looks up from his thorough inspection of Cat's beans, her paw gently clasped between his thumb and forefinger, and goes "Mm?"

"Been thinking."

Jon lifts one eyebrow. "Mm?"

"We could get her a proper little collar and everything."

Jon blinks a couple of times, then smiles. "Oh, for the wedding, you mean?" Martin nods. "Oh, yes, it could match your tie."

Okay, that's adorable, but also, unfortunately, not the point.

"Ooh, yeah," he says, then: "Oh! And, like, a little engraved name-tag. Really fancy."

Jon's eyes narrow almost imperceptibly.

"Yes," he says, tone completely unreadable. "Silver or gold, do you think?"

Martin's suddenly wondering if it's a trap.

"Dunno," he says, turning his eyes back to the brightly-coloured advert on the screen. "What's her vibe, you think?"

In the corner of his eye he sees Jon's jaw working silently as he searches for something to say.

"I think your input should be taken into consideration," he says, lifting his chin as Cat stands, stretches, and headbutts him. "Since... you know."

Martin considers whether or not Jon's messing with him, because frankly, he very much does not know.

"Mmm. Well! Uh- I- I like gold. Would match our bands."

"True enough," Jon says. Cat leaps onto the back of the sofa, and they're both silent till she curls up there and falls back asleep.

Jon doesn't seem very eager to say anything else.

Bugger.

"So..." Martin says, lifting his glasses to rub his eyes. "Um... what's the spelling, again?"

Jon's blurry form sits up straighter, and when Martin puts his glasses back on he sees his mouth open in shock.

"Might I ask why you're asking me?" Jon says, which doesn't make any sense.

"W- um. Y- you know, you're the English teacher."

Jon inclines his head to the side, frowning. "Hmm," he goes. "W- I- I- yes, I—mm." He lowers himself back against the sofa again. "The usual way."

Martin sighs.

"Right," he says. "Okay."

The silence gets a bit fraught, then. When Martin stands up to take their mugs to the kitchen, he might be a tiny bit huffy. It's possible.

Jon follows him, and he stays huffy, because it's easier to keep up than neutrality when he's trying to hide that he's a bit annoyed and a bit embarrassed.

"Everything alright?" Jon says, leaning casually against the fridge as Martin puts way too much effort into scrubbing both mugs clean.

"Mm."

Several seconds pass.

"Could I say something?" Jon asks, a bit hesitantly.

If Martin had to guess, he'd put money on "you're a negligent idiot for not paying enough attention to know my cat's name and I hate you".

"Yeah."

Jon exhales audibly behind him, as though amused.

"With all due respect and affection, darling—" He pauses till Martin is finished aggressively rinsing the mugs. Martin still doesn't turn to face him, though, because he's a tiny bit scared of where this is going, honestly. "If you've forgotten how to spell your own cat's name, that's not, strictly speaking, my fault, is it?"

Martin turns around.

Several things occur to him at once.

First, Cat's a dirty freeloader who owes Martin like fourteen months of rent.

Second, it might, legitimately, have been a coincidence that she and Jon moved in around the same time.

Third, he can't remember a time he's heard Jon use any method of address on her except for creature, or beast, or the ones Martin uses himself.

Which means, fourth, Jon doesn't know her bloody name either.

Because she's not his cat.

Well.

"Okay," Martin says. "Let's assume I have forgotten. Couldn't you just—help me out—and spell it?"

"Martin," Jon says disparagingly with a frown.

"Jon," Martin says, trying really hard not to smirk.

Jon does that thing where his mouth starts in a flat line, but as his irritation grows, his nose scrunches up, and the line of his mouth slowly rises up his face until he exclaims inarticulately and throws his hands in the air in defeat.

"Fine!" he says. "Fine, okay, alright, fine. I—I don't—I don't know. I don't know! I meant to ask, but I felt negligent not having known when I moved in, and then, after a month or seven I couldn't very well come out and ask, could I? And then—good heavens, it's been more than a year, there was no subtle way to recover!"

Martin's not laughing at him.

But he is laughing.

Breathlessly, uncontrollably, doubling over—to the point where Jon actually crosses the few steps separating them in the tiny kitchen to place a hand on his shoulder, gently guiding him upright with a concerned look on his face.

"Sorry," Martin manages eventually, wiping tears from his eyes. "Christ, sorry, I'm just—"

He takes a deep, measured breath.

"I've got to tell you something," he says sheepishly. Jon puts his hands on Martin's shoulders and looks into his face with the earnest sobriety that, even now, gives Martin butterflies.

"Anything," he says, still frowning intensely.

Martin averts his eyes. "She's not my cat either."

When Jon stops laughing, he spends the rest of the evening lecturing Cat in his Not Mad Just Disappointed voice ("identity fraud is an extremely serious matter, young lady, and you are terribly lucky you have such sweet little eyes, or I might be compelled to take legal action against you, please let go of my nose").

Oh, but they do end up getting her an engraved gold name-tag for the ceremony.

It says 'Lady Catherine (Beast)'.

[sexiestpodcastcharacter]

Eye Bracket — Finals

Propaganda

Cecil Gershwin Palmer (Welcome to Night Vale):

Purple eye man <3

Hes like, THE eye narrator guy for podcasts imo.

THE tumblr sexyman

Not too short or tall, not fat or too thin. With hair, a nose and eyes. Look, hes hot and sexy because he's an ambiguous gendered male pronoun character who's openly gay imminently. His hotness comes from his lack of description and his silly, whimsical nature. As a "The idea of having sex with my physical body is kinda yuck" ace, I would have sex with him irl if given the chance. He is the ONLY exception for my own minds rule. While that might not be real propaganda or whatever it should have weigh of how hot he is.

Cecil Gershwin Palmer my beloved ♥️♥️

Jonathan Sims/The Archivist (The Magnus Archives):

I just think it'd be funny if an asexual character won

(im ripping this from the wiki btw) John has prematurely greying hair and looks older than he is. He often looks very tired and is physically unfit, as other characters refer to him as scrawny and he tires easily from physical tasks that others perform with little exertion. he also has lots of scars.

(propaganda, spoilers for The Magnus Archives) He's a wet cat and at one point dated Georgie Barker and does date Martin Blackwood. there is also a whole tag/movement for "hot Jon rights". he may not be like, 10/10 on the attractive scale but his far off gaze has captivated me

My votes for jon tho, that wet tired cat of a man has captured my heart. He gives dilf vibes and i got a thing for those 0.o

So Jon has EYEBAGS‼️‼️ I rest my case Your Honor. Vote Jon

[cirrus-grey]

Hi! While listening to TMA and slowly going through some episode tags, I found your blog! I really like your TMA takes, and since some other people's posts from back when the episodes were airing surprised me, I was wondering if it's okay to ask you for your opinion on something 4 years late.

I just got to what looks like the end of a longer subplot - Jon and Martin talked at the end of episode 174 about how Jon feels like killing people makes him worse. While going through the tags of the previous episodes, I was pretty surprised at how divisive episode 169 was. I definitely didn't expect people to read Jon as forcing Martin to go with him into the burning building or disregarding his wishes; I wasn't expecting people to read Martin as manipulative either. It felt like they communicated as well as they could while not being in a good place, mentally speaking (and, well, physically too). Still, I feel like it was easier for me to put myself into Martin's headspace, and even though I know Jon doesn't like admitting to wanting to hurt anyone because he feels guilty (which is good of course, that he lets himself feel conflicted, and pretty expected that he doesn't like broadcasting wanting to kill someone), his level of evasiveness surprised me, especially with how long he didn't admit there was another way to go. There are a lot of things in his head happening simultaneously (not wanting Martin to be in distress, wanting to kill Jude, trying to communicate, being aware he should have communicated sooner) that I can't seem to make sense of, and I wanted to ask you about your thoughts on this, if you feel like sharing!

Hello and welcome! I’m always down to offer my opinions on TMA. Sorry this one took a few days to answer - I wanted to check a few details in the transcript and I haven’t had a chance to sit down with it until today. That being said, one major caveat before I start: I haven’t listened to this season in a while, so I may be missing some extra context from conversations that surround this episode. Take what I say with a grain of salt!

Most importantly: Jon does not realize his actions are causing Martin undue distress until the tape turns on and the episode starts. Martin hasn’t voiced any particular dislike of fire until then, and Jon has promised not to read his mind. He’s keeping that promise, so when he makes the decision to go after Jude he doesn’t see any reason why it should be different than smiting Not!Sasha, or going after Oliver. (There’s also something to be said here about the fact that Jon is so used to physical pain at this point that he doesn’t realize Martin sees it as a reason to avoid an area, but that gets into a different sort of character analysis.) As far as Jon is concerned, going after Jude is no more unpleasant an experience than crossing any other domain, so he doesn’t see a need to give Martin advance warning. It’s a failure of communication on both sides, but an understandable one.

As you say, he’s hesitant to admit he wants to kill Jude… but I think there’s also a level of assuming that Martin will be absolutely onboard with it. So far, he killed Not!Sasha and Martin proposed going full Kill Bill, he didn’t kill Oliver and Martin was disappointed… surely this is just getting back on track, right? Martin’s the one that really wanted to kill avatars, surely he won’t object to Jon picking which avatars they kill, right? (“It’s just – when you said –” “You said you were onboard.”)

All of which is to say, I don’t think he sees it as hiding something from Martin, or needing to ‘admit’ that there’s another way to go. He genuinely doesn’t realize that Martin might want to find another way to go until he asks (“You’re sure there isn’t another way?”) and then literally the first thing Jon says is “I’m sorry,” because it doesn’t hit him until that moment that he’s just assumed Martin’s willingness the entire way without asking him. As soon as he realizes Martin might not be willing, he tries his best to let him make the choice. (“Alright. If you really don’t want to do this, w-we can go another way.” “I should have told you before, so – I leave the decision to you.”)

…Which is, I think, the part of the episode that most people were arguing about after it dropped.

Martin throwing the choice right back at Jon… it isn’t deliberately manipulative, but he’s definitely making an opening for Jon to step in with the chivalrous boyfriend ‘I’d never put you in harm’s way, let’s turn around!’ thing. He’s assuming that Jon knows how he really feels (‘please let’s not go through the fire’), and is using that to avoid having to disappoint Jon by asking to find another way. He’s the one who proposed Kill Bill - he doesn’t want to be the one to call it off now, certainly not when Jon seems to have his heart set on it.

Jon, of course, takes his “It’s your revenge; your choice, not mine,” at face value and decides to go in. I’ve never seen it as forcing Martin to go in, it’s just… trusting that Martin is being honest with him when he says he wants Jon to make the decision. Jon said he wanted to go through, Martin said it’s his decision, surely Martin must know that means they’re going through. Yes, he’s failing to read Martin’s subtext, but… Jon has struggled with paranoia for a long time. He had to make a deliberate choice to trust people (end of season 3) and in many ways trust is still a deliberate choice. That includes trusting your boyfriend when he says “it’s your choice.” Jon’s not about to start listening to that nagging little voice in the back of his head saying ‘maybe he doesn’t mean that’ because it’s the same nagging little voice that used to say ‘maybe he’s trying to kill you.’ By now he knows that Martin will be distressed by going through, but Martin has told him that he’s willing to undergo that distress for the sake of Jon’s revenge, so it's okay. (He doesn’t and can’t know that Jude will take so long to die and make it that much more distressing in the process; I think both of them would have handled this whole conversation differently if they’d known they were going to end up in the middle of an inferno.)

Phew! That got long. Tl;dr, it’s communication problems on both sides (it always is with these two), not anything deliberately malicious. Jon’s not forcing Martin, he’s just making assumptions; Martin’s not manipulating Jon, he’s just being conflict-avoidant. Under any normal circumstances it wouldn't be a big deal (“You said you were okay with me painting the living room!” “I didn't think you meant purple, Jon!” “Okay, okay, if it bothers you that much we can pick a different color.” “No, no, it's your project; your choice.” “Purple, then.” “Oh.”), they just have the misfortune of being in the middle of the apocalypse, which blows all those normal couple problems way out of proportion.

[hemi-demi]

Making a proper blog intro because I think I should? Idk anymore

Hi! I am a person on the internet that is way too autistic about a specific show, and now I'm making it everyone's problem.

Side blog: @fulldemi for just art posts

Links, tags, and more below cut:

What you'll see on this blog:

Right now, it's all TMA/TMAGP all the time, as this has gone beyond hyperfixation and right into special interest, and I do not want off this ride anytime soon. Most of my content will probably be JMart related, but I like talking about most of the characters in general.

I've been getting into Malevolent lately too, so it might come up. Not sure yet, time will tell.

I make art and fic. I'll post random thoughts and reblog other artists I enjoy.

I post SFW and NSFW art here, so refer to the Tags below for filters.

Eventually, you might even see animation and fan game stuff from me here. Who knows? I don't. I have no control over my life. I just go where the dopamine tells me. And right now, it's hurdling towards the wet cat acespec British man and his fog-cloaked teddy bear boyfriend, and I don't get a say in that.

Main Tags

My art: #hemidemi art

My NSFW art: #lewdemi

Links

Text posts and rambles: #demirambles

Pillowfort - HemiDemi

Lewd art too hot for Tumblr goes here

My AO3 - *Slaps Link* This baby can fit so much JMart fic in it! Most of my fic is 18+

If you were to check out any of my fics, it would of course be the stupid long Porn with Plot fic where Jon and Martin can share lucid dreams and get into fun little nighttime adventures together in the Highlands. It's silly, it's fluffy, but also so plot heavy and full of horror, as it should be.

Lucid - Rated E - Words: 341,700 - Chapters: 44/44

I post (spoiler-free-ish) art from this fic here often as well, so you'll be seeing it referenced a ton if you hang around.

I use the tag #lucid spoilers for content that actively spoils the fic, so feel free to block this tag if you're currently reading this behemoth.

Okay, I think that's enough now, byeee love you, mwah <3

[kazperthegh0st]

RaTing TMA season 1 episodes

001: Angler Fish, the cigarette and disappearance one. Not very memorable. 5/10

002: Do Not Open, the will power this one man contains is greater than God, i swear. I probably would have opened that coffin tbh. 10/10

003: Across the Street, to be Grahm or Not to be Grahm, that is the question. Eating paper is not really my thing but you do you. 8/10

004: Page Turner, kinda boring to me but it introduces important people. 4/10

005: Thrown Away, it reminds me of that one short FNAF story where the girl finds her real body cut up in garbage bags. I liked this episode. 9/10

006: Squirm, I have no memory of this episode. 2/10

007: The Piper, All i remember is rats, a dead dude in a dumb ditch, and The Great War. It was a good read tho. 4/10

008: Burned Out, There was a Spooky Tree, an apple, and a box ( i think it had a necklace in it??). There is also the religious dude— i think hes also the jesuit dude that killed two people in a later episode but i could be wrong. 5/10

009: A Fathers Love, this one was so sad to me ngl. I have two questions: What happened to the mother (i know she died but theres gotta be more)? and also whats the necklace all about ( i might be crazy but wasn’t it in the box in burned out?)? I do think the dad is somehow innocent, like he was possessed or smth. 10/10

010: Vampire Killer, this was a cool, fun episode and I enjoyed the different approach to Vampires. 9/10

011: Dreamer, We hear some new stuff about what happened to Jon’s predecessor, outside of that its an ok episode. Elias is mentioned. 5/10

012: First Aid, don’t remember this episode at all but i looked at the episode tag on here and Gerry is in it so on principle it gets a 5/10

013: Alone, my mind is so blank about this episode. Jon was nice tho. 2/10

014: Piecemeal, i don’t remember it well but Tumblr tells me it was good. 5/10

015: Lost Johns’ Cave, this reminded me of those tiktok videos about idiots who get stuck in caves. But at the same time this episode was deeply unsettling and sad. 10/10

016: Arachnophobia, proof that spiders do not die no matter what you do. Lazy ass cat ( Major Tom, great name, unintended David Bowie reference ) 8/10

***All previous thoughts were made well after the episodes were read so i could be wrong or forgetful regarding some details.***Future thoughts will be made immediately after, or the same day as reading the episodes.***

017: The Boneturners Tale, more of the weird books. I think there was arson in this episode (?) 5/10

018: The Man Upstairs, This one was absolutely disgusting (in a good way?!?!) it made me want to throw up but at the same time was sooo cool. 8/10

019: Confession and 020: Desecrated Host, putting these two together. Why is there such a strong theme of cannibalism and removal of body parts in this podcast? It was really interesting and well written. 8/10

021: Freefall, not that interesting to me ngl. It wasnt bad tho 5/10

022: Colony, MARTIN!!! A real character! He is a sweet innocent baby who can do no wrong. The episode itself was super unsettling. Who is the woman again tho?

023: Schwartzwald, this was boring, sorry. I know i should have found it more interesting cause its a letter for Jonah Magnus but it just wasn’t appealing to me. 2/10

024: Strange Music, I love the aesthetic of Pipe Organs, always have. (Why is it now in the institute?!?!) the creepy dolls and the circus clowns were cool. I love that the movers came back again, kinda odd but thats expected. 10/10

025: Growing Dark, not too memorable but there is now another missing person. (Yay). 4/10

026: A Distortion, SASHA!!! Another Real Character! Nothing had better happen to Jon or Martin or else. I love them too much. Micheal seems interesting too. 8/10

027: A Sturdy Lock, the first episode I listened to while reading the transcript. Is there or is there not a lock on that door? Bro should invest in a pet tho. Average episode but still good. 7/10

028: Skin Tight, wasn’t Cambridge Military Hospital in another episode? Also who is the archivist? The voice ( im listening and reading ) is different from Jon’s and is not female so not Gertrude. Sarah Baldwin is also a familiar name. Skin peeling. Lovely. (Sarcasm) 10/10

029: Cheating Death, reminds me of 007. I think its neat that the person making the statement had the Institute write it for him. This was a cool story. I like how much of it was a folktale and then it took a turn. 10/10

030: The killing floor, oh the delights of the meat industry. What was up with Tom Haan tho? Why did he kill himself? Why is there a living meat pile?!?! 10/10

Shortly after listening to that episode i made steak. While making steak i listened to the next two.

031: First Hunt, I kept thinking of that “Run Rabbit” song. Im glad humans dont have natural predators. But as an American (unfortunately) as soon as I heard where this was and the guy made note of the whistling… I knew he was screwed. Jon is so dissmissive tho. First episode where i only listened to it. 10/10

I have no idea why the previous story made me decide to cook steak.

032: Hive, this wasn’t much of a real statement but proof that Jane is crazy. It was just “insects do be buzzing” the noises in the background were upsetting. (Listened only while cooking a steak) 10/10

033: Boatswain’s Call, We meet Peter Lukas ( who may or may not be Elias’s Husband? I saw it in a Tiktok ) and I think it was slightly unsettling how they all loaded into the lifeboat. Did they vote the dude out or something? (Read and listened) 8/10

034: Anatomy Class, body snatchers named John/Jane Doe traumatize a professor. I love how they’re all trying to pump their hearts to figure out how they’re supposed to beat. Im a big fan of anatomical sciences. (Read only) 10/10

035: Old Passages, It’s Gerry on the hunt for Leitners books! Another dead person and some secret passages. What happened to Jon. Why did the Delivery Duo Dudes show up with a package for him??? (Read only) 10/10

036: Taken Ill, the episode itself was boring to me but the end was interesting. Why is there a lighter, that i assume has connections to The Web? What does Elias want with it? (Read only) 7/10

037: Burnt Offering, boring. Sorry. Could the wicca and voodoo stuff in the woods be related to Jane? (Read only) 5/10

038: Lost and Found, This was Sad. Important things go missing, more so they cease to exist, until eventually its the Husband. Jons fear of spiders returns. And now for the end of Season 1. (Read only) 10/10

039: Infestation, I did find it funny when Jon called himself an idiot. Martin just needs to let my boy Jon be in (SEVERE) denial. Jon is being watched (the eye!) Tim is so excited that he almost died. Its odd. Oooh its Not Sasha! “Archivist.” “Shit.” (I listened to it and then read the transcript) 9/10

040: Human Remains, what did Not Sasha do with the tape… I do know what happened to Gertrude so Elias acting the way he does in this scene is funny. (I listened to it then read the transcript) 9/10

Really good podcast. I liked it.

— are the secret passages from 038 connected in anyway to the tunnels around the archives?

— what was it that got sasha in the end and is real sasha dead?

— does gerard start to pop up more often? As an actual cast member?

— what was Jane looking for in the written files?

[grahamfolgersdeliciousnotebooks]

Today I got this comment on the Jeopardy! AU that I haven’t updated on way too long, and was reminded of the fact that I have had a scene about this exact thing sitting in my draft of the final chapter for about a year and a half.

I fully intend to finish this fic, but unfortunately on top of some (not too serious, but still persistent and annoying) health problems that have made it hard to tackle much writing in general, I also have the issue that the longer this fic goes without updating, the more my brain creates a ton of anxieties and blocks around this fic in particular, so I’m not sure when that will be. So I figured in the meantime, I might as well share a short little snippet about how Twitter (which was still called Twitter when I wrote this and wasn’t owned by Elon Musk good god this has been on hiatus too long) is feeling about Jon’s Jeopardy! run in this universe:

[Jon gets a text from Georgie with a link to a tweet and the question “Have you seen this?”]

The tweet consisted of video with a thumbnail of Jon behind a Jeopardy! podium, accompanied by the caption, "My coworker, Martin..." Jon pressed play warily.

When he did, he found that someone had made a compilation of all the times he’d said the phrase, “My coworker, Martin,” throughout his time on Jeopardy! The video was nearly two minutes long. Only half of the episodes Jon had filmed had aired so far.

Against his better judgement, Jon clicked on the #jeopardy tag to see what else people had to say. The results were… illuminating.

“Fuck soulmates, I want whatever Jonathan Sims and his coworker, Martin, have going on.”

“just want someone to someone to love me the way the jeopardy man loves his coworker martin”

“Should I make a #jeopardy drinking game? So far the only rule I’ve got is, ‘drink every time Jonathan mentions his coworker Martin,’ but I think that’s a pretty good start.”

“I don’t think half my coworkers even know my name…”

“I want what they have (12-time Jeopardy champion Jonathan Sims and his co-worker, Martin)”

He closed the tab. He was fairly sure he'd gotten the gist.

[ao3feed-jonmartin]

why on the earth should i stay (now that you are gone)

read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/JLWMsGd by mashedgravyandpotatoes It’s been far too long since Martin’s died. And yet… —— Jon stumbles into the ballroom. His leg aches and his eyes burn with unshed tears. He doesn’t bother shutting the door, his head is spinning too much to think clearly. Words: 1139, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Fandoms: The Magnus Archives (Podcast) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: Major Character Death Categories: M/M Characters: Martin Blackwood, Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist, Gerard Keay (referenced) Relationships: Martin Blackwood/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - The Secret Garden Fusion, Archibald!Jon, Lily!Martin, Colin!Gerry, Chronic Pain, Grief/Mourning, dead spouse, Talking To Dead People, Ghost?, Hallucinations?, Jon doesn’t know, And Neither Do I, Basically, Jon is (as always) Going Through It(TM), this one’s sad gang, Hurt/Comfort, but really it’s all hurt read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/JLWMsGd

[neverwalka1one]

Magnus Protocol 7

Alright, crackpot theory time!

SO.

a) Jon might not be Jonathan Sims, Head Archivist of the Magnus Archives but you know what I'm going to BELIEVE it is, so Jon's out there sending emails, are they not in the computer, are they out in the world, do they REMEMBER?

which leads to

b) I... don't think the voices are Jon and Martin and whoever Augustus might be. I think, to borrow a line from the first EP, it's just... some of them. Something the fears learned to mimic and scrape away. Which. Yikes.

c) Celia continues to be utterly unconvincing as a 'normal' person, she KNOWS what the heck is going on, she named fears specifically, she mentioned tape recorders, she RECOGNIZED JON'S VOICE.

d) The Bouchards are rich. Why?

e) Colin knows more than he should too.

f) Lena fails at being reassuring at every turn. I've seen theories about her insistence on how food she makes/brings be kept on site, and I'm now convinced there's something in it that's ... idk, but not good for the folk that eat it. Alice has the right idea, bring your own food to work. Do not drink the office coffee.

g) Jon Sims has it in for Hilltop Road.

h)Tag yourself I'm a taxidermied vulture.

[wrestlingisfake]

AEW Fake Rankings, 10/20/2024

Men's singles division - babyfaces

Will Ospreay

Darby Allin

Ricochet

Jay White

Mark Briscoe (ROH men's world champion)

Daniel Garcia

Orange Cassidy

Kyle O'Reilly

HOOK

Katsuyori Shibata

Men's singles division - heels

Jon Moxley (AEW men's world champion)

Kazuchika Okada (AEW continental champion)

Adam Page

Konosuke Takeshita (AEW international champion)

Christian Cage

Jack Perry (AEW TNT champion)

Chris Jericho

Kyle Fletcher

Shelton Benjamin

Roderick Strong

Unranked: Aaron Solo, Angelico, AR Fox, Atlantis Jr.*, Big Bill, Bryan Keith, Hologram, Jeff Jarrett, Johnny TV, Juice Robinson, Komander, Lio Rush*, Minoru Suzuki*, Nick Wayne, Rocky Romero*, Serpentico/Jon Cruz, The Butcher

Jobbers: Alpha Zo*, BEEF*, Chris Nastyy*, Cody Chhun*, Jack Cartwheel*, Joe Keys*, Marcus Mathers*, Matt Brannigan*, Olumide*, Ryan Clancy*, TJ Crawford

* Not listed on AEW's official roster webpage

Moxley has declared war on the AEW roster (or at least the men's locker room), and it feels like he'll spend at least the next six months clobbering wave after wave of "complacent" midcarders. Darby Allin is clearly being set up as a major destination for this saga, but I'm not certain if he'll be Moxley's first big challenger, or if he'll be saved for the end like Sting in 1997. There's also foreshadowing of Orange Cassidy and Daniel Garcia stepping up, and I think Hook and Kyle O'Reilly would fit in that role as well. But only one guy can get the rub of dethroning Mox, and we'll just have to wait and see who that will be.

Heading into Full Gear on November 23, the other top programs look to be Jay White vs. Adam Page, Ospreay vs. Fletcher, Takeshita vs. Fletcher, Jericho vs. Briscoe, Garcia vs. Perry, Swerve Strickland vs. Shelton Benjamin, and Adam Cole vs. MJF. I expect Hook vs. Christian Cage will be a thing too, but right now it's just an educated guess that Christian is the one who attacked Hook's father.

Men's tag team division - babyfaces

The Acclaimed - Max Caster & Anthony Bowens

FTR - Dax Wheeler & Cash Wheeler

Private Party - Isiah Kassidy & Marq Quen

Dustin Rhodes (ROH trios champion) & Sammy Guevara (ROH tag team champions)

The Outrunners - Truth Magnum* & Turbo Floyd*

Men's tag team division - heels

The Young Bucks - Matt Jackson & Nick Jackson (AEW tag team champions)

Grizzled Young Veterans - James Drake* & Zack Gibson*

MxM Collection - Mason Madden* & Mansoor*

Matt Taven & Mike Bennett

Brian Cage (ROH men's television champion) & Lance Archer

Iron Savages - Bulk Bronson* & Beefcake Boulder*

* Not listed on AEW's official roster webpage

The state of the tag division is this: The Bucks are heel champions with no one to fight. The Acclaimed haven't ever gotten a clean two-on-two title shot all year, but they don't seem to be in a hurry to get it anymore. FTR and Private Party already lost to the Bucks. The Outrunners, MxM, and the Iron Savages are all cool as hell, but they're comedy acts that can't beat anybody. I don't think GYV have been around since they got upset by the Outrunners, which may be a sign that they aren't going to be back. Rhodes-Guevara and Taven-Bennett are big deals in ROH but off the radar in AEW. Don Callis has put Cage and Archer together to chase the tag title, but I don't see that going anywhere as long as the champions are also heels.

I'd like to see Private Party rack up a big win to get back into the title hunt, but I don't see why that should turn out any differently than the title match they just lost last week. So it feels like the division is going nowhere, marking time until the Golden Lovers (Kenny Omega and Kota Ibushi) are ready to feud with the Bucks. Which, I'd be fine with doing that feud, but not if it means keeping the division in deep freeze for a couple more months.

Men's trios division - babyfaces

Malakai Black & Brody King & Buddy Matthews

Action Andretti & Dante Martin & Darius Martin

Dark Order - Evil Uno & John Silver & Alex Reynolds

Men's trios division - heels

Claudio Castagnoli & Wheeler Yuta & PAC (AEW trios champions)

La Faccion Ingobernable - Rush & Dralistico & The Beast Mortos

Premier Athletes - Tony Nese & Josh Woods & Ariya Daivari

Moxley's running buddies control the trios title, which works out well since all the undercard scrubs they keep beating up can then demand a match and get clobbered in a trios match. This seems to be giving Dark Order and Action-Darius-Dante something to work with, even if it's not much and they have no hope of winning. I think Daniel Garcia and Private Party would be a stronger trio to go after the title, but they're not done yet with Jack Perry and the Young Bucks.

The House of Black is remarkably well protected for a group that never figures into any major storylines. Are they being built up to take the belts from Claudio, Pac, and Yuta? Could Julia Hart return to counter Marina Shafir? Who knows.

I stuck LFI in the trios division because I really don't know what those three guys are going to do, now that they're all in the same team with Jake Roberts. I don't think AEW knows either, so that'll probably lead to a bunch of throwaway trios matches. Hopefully they can at least win those matches, which would keep them ahead of Neese-Woods-Daivari.

Women's division - babyfaces

Britt Baker

Willow Nightingale

Jamie Hayter

Kris Statlander

Anna Jay

Queen Aminata

Nyla Rose

Yuka Sakazaki

Lady Frost*

Trish Adora*

Women's division - heels

Mariah May (AEW women's world champion)

Mercedes Mone (AEW TBS champion, STRONG women's champion)

Kamille

Serena Deeb

Taya Valkyrie

Emi Sakura

Harley Cameron

Robyn Renegade*

Jobbers: Amira*, Brooke Havok*, Zoey Lynn*

* Not listed on AEW's official roster webpage

You'd think Marina Shafir would be running rough-shod over the women's division to lock up its top title the way Moxley has with the men. The problem is that moving the world title would disrupt the Mariah May/Toni Storm/Mina Shirakawa storyline. I guess Shafir could crush Mone, but I don't know if that would do either of them any good. Sooner or later, though, it will become clear that Marina is the woman to beat, which will get awkward if there are too many champions that can't beat her.

As it is, the big programs for the women right now are Mariah vs. Anna Jay, Mone and Kamille vs. Statlander, and, uh, Jamie Hayter vs. Penelope Ford? It feels like there should be more going on right now. But I don't know where Britt and Willow are headed, Deonna Purrazzo and Taya Valkyrie keep doing pre-taped promos about nothing, and Toni Storm is still roaming the world pretending she doesn't know who Mariah May is. After five years AEW's women's roster finally has some real depth, but that only gets the division so far when it only gets 3-4 matches per week.

No televised AEW matches in over 30 days: Abadon, Athena (ROH women's world champion), Brandon Cutler, Diamante, Lee Moriarty (ROH pure champion), Marhsall Von Erich* (ROH trios champion), Preston Vance, Red Velvet (ROH women's television champion), Ross Von Erich* (ROH trios champion), Shane Taylor, Shawn Dean

* Not listed on AEW's official roster webpage

Not much new to report about the wrestlers officially signed to AEW but almost exclusively appearing on Ring of Honor. They're on the shows, they're getting work, it's just that almost nobody hears about it. The worst part is most of these names can't even get booked on an ROH pay-per-view.

No televised AEW or ROH matches in over 30 days: Anthony Ogogo, Angelo Parker, Austin Gunn, Bishop Kaun, Bobby Dutch, Colten Gunn, Deonna Purrazzo, Griff Garrison, Hikaru Shida, Jay Lethal, Kip Sabian, Leila Grey, Lee Johnson, Marina Shafir, Matt Menard, Peter Avalon, Swerve Strickland, Thunder Rosa, Toa Liona, Toni Storm, Vincent Marseglia

The bad news is that I don't know why most of these wrestlers haven't been in the ring lately, but the good news is most of them haven't been completely MIA. Some were around in late August/early September, some are on the show right now but not wrestling, and some are booked for the next couple of weeks. That's what I like to see.

No televised AEW or ROH matches in over 90 days: Colt Cabana, Danhausen, Kiera Hogan, Madison Rayne, Mercedes Martinez, Penta El Zero Miedo, Powerhouse Hobbs, Rey Fenix, Ricky Starks

These are the wrestlers I'm worried about. Colt and Madison seem to be transitioning to backstage roles and/or semi-retirement, so that's okay. But I have no idea why Tony Khan would have Danhausen, Starks, Penta, and Fenix on the payroll and not book them. I realize Penta and Fenix are reportedly planning to go to WWE, but that doesn't mean you can use them to do a few jobs on the way out. Hobbs is supposed to be medically cleared, so I don't understand why he wasn't around for the big Don Callis Family promo on October 16. Hogan and Martinez seem to have fallen off the face of the earth.

No televised AEW or ROH matches in 2024: Adam Cole, Kota Ibushi, Michael Nakazawa, Miro, Penelope Ford, Scorpio Sky, Tay Melo

Cole and Ford just got back and should be returning to the ring imminently. Ibushi has already returned to the ring in Japan and I figure he'll be back in an AEW ring soon enough. I've heard Melo is training to return from maternity leave so it's probably just a matter of time. Nakazawa seems to just be a backstage guy at this point. It was recently reported that Miro requested his release, but evidently he hasn't gotten it. AEW was running hype videos for Scorpio a few months ago but then dropped it, so I have no idea.

Part-time/semi-retired: Alex Abrahantes, Karen Jarrett, Luther, Mark Sterling, Nigel McGuinness, Paul Wight, Prince Nana, Rebel, Satnam Singh, Sonjay Dutt, Stokely Hathaway

I suppose I'll have to move Bryan Danielson into this list, once he's gotten his neck issues worked out and if he can still go on a part-time basis.

Inactive

Adam Copeland (left leg - tibia fracture)

Angel Ortiz (right shoulder - pectoralis tear)

Bandido (left arm - wrist fracture)

Bryan Danielson (storyline injuries - probably to set up legit neck surgery)

Chuck Taylor (left ankle - necrosis)

Eddie Kingston (right leg - tibia fracture, ACL/meniscus tear)

Julia Hart (shoulder - unspecified injury)

Keith Lee (undisclosed injury)

Kenny Omega (diverticulitis)

Killswitch (double pneumonia)

Leyla Hirsch (elbow - dislocation)

Mark Davis (left arm - wrist fracture)

Matt Sydal (right foot - malunion fractures)

MJF (filming Happy Gilmore 2)

Nick Comoroto (hip resurfacing)

Riho (work visa delays)

Ruby Soho (pregnant)

Samoa Joe (filming Twisted Metal season 2)

Saraya (storyline - "incapacitated")

Skye Blue (right ankle - fracture)

The Blade (lower back - herniated disc)

Trent Beretta (neck - hardware removal surgery)

Wardlow (knee - unspecified injury)

I haven't heard any significant updates on any of these wrestlers. Lately it seems like a report will come out that so-and-so is medically cleared, and then so-and-so still sits in the twilight zone for months before they come back. So even if there was news I don't think it would help us estimate when a wrestler will return to the ring.

[esther-dot]

I feel very conflicted and I know I’ll get hate if I post this on my blog but I just want feedback. I loved D for years after watching the show until season 8 came out and I felt betrayed. I thought it was out of character. I wanted happy romantic J x D. I saw myself in D. I’ve read the books at long last over the past year and I know I have confirmation bias. I love Sansa too. And I see myself in her as well. Deep down I know that I am far more like book!Sansa than I am like the character D really is and that the D in my head is not truly who the character is. I want to love Jonsa. I think that could be such a happy end for Sansa and I want to want that (that being specifically Jonsa; of course I want a happy end for her). But I don’t know how to shake my attachment to D and the character I want her to be. I can’t let go and stop projecting despite consciously being aware that she is not truly very much like me at all. I think perhaps because Sansa’s arc has not yet had as much direct payoff. She has not yet been able to claim power in the way D has and I think thus identifying myself with her may cast a light on uncomfortable feelings of helplessness within myself. But I’m not really sure. All I know is that logically I wish for Sansa to be my favorite and I want to love Jonsa instead of JxD and I know Sansa is quite a bit like me but I just can’t seem to embrace that. I’m not sure if I am looking for any sort of advice or wisdom or perhaps just wanting to put my thoughts out there. I’m curious about anything at all that you might have to say

I have my opinions and preferences, but there’s a difference between emotionally connecting and intellectually engaging. I’ve read loads of classic novels because I want to know what they say, why they matter, but I often fail to find them personally meaningful. That’s simply due to life experience which is why certain things resonate with me or don’t. I’ve found, none of us read the same novel, even if we agree on certain aspects or characters, there’s always something else that hits us differently. That’s not an indictment or vindication of a person because I’ve revisited books years later and my response is wildly different.

The book didn’t change, life changed me so I read it differently this time around. That's a good thing to bear in mind when we're talking about the same series for years on end, there's room for us to evolve our stances because we're changing. I leave room for that with others, I permit myself the same understanding. I hope you do that for yourself too!

Also, my sensibilities aren’t Martin’s, so even if I make arguments about why a certain thing shouldn’t/should happen, I know it still might or might not. Jon and Dany isn’t a universally accepted pairing for no reason. And even though most of what I say about Dany I tag with “anti,” that’s just because I want people to be able to avoid it if they’d like. I don’t hate her, I have a lot of sympathy for her. I think her story is full of tragedy, so I don’t think there’s anything weird about reading the books and your heart going out to her. Many, many fans identify with her, some because they too are abuse survivors. That’s why a lot of fans connected so deeply with show Sansa as well. I was frustrated before the GoT finale because the people who argued with us about Dany were actively defending her burning people alive and denying where her story was going, but after GoT ended, I went into the Dany tag and saw a few posts by more normal fans who simply loved a girl who had inspired them and helped them in their own struggles, so I understand who she is to people even if she isn’t that to me.

I loved D for years after watching the show until season 8 came out and I felt betrayed.

This was a pretty universal sentiment, and I felt betrayed too (although for different reasons, coming from a completely different direction), so I sympathize.

Deep down I know that I am far more like book!Sansa than I am like the character D really is and that the D in my head is not truly who the character is.

I think the “problem” (not really a problem, but we’ll call it that) is that Martin wants his characters to be more than one thing. I’ve said in the past, he has quite an expansive view of what one person can encompass which means, I look at, let’s say, the Hound quite differently than many in the fandom. Every bad thing I have ever said about him is true, but there are good things about him that are true too, and Martin wants both to coexist. That’s true for Tyrion (another villain), Jaime, Theon….it’s true for Dany too. She’s even more enmeshed with good things, as more good desires, than those guys, so it’s easy to let it eclipse everything else. I’ve pointed out before that with Dany, it’s always a one-two. She “saves” people, then we discover it wasn’t salvation at all. You have to be open to questioning her to realize that though.

The way the show framed her, a lot of people saw themselves or who they wanted to be in Dany, and even now, I’ll hear people occasionally compare themselves to Dany in a positive way, because for years, she was a #girlboss. We might have a lot of skepticism around that idea now, realizing it was to hide what her story actually was, but it resonated because, who wouldn’t want to be capable of fighting injustice? Of walking into a situation and taking control of it and rectifying wrongs? The problem is, in the books, we’re presented with the reality that her methods aren’t improving things, and in the show, they mute that as much as possible. When the author is trying to show the devastation of war and the showrunners opted to glorify it, the audience is gonna have a reaction that’s no longer compatible with the original intent. For instance, Arya killing all the Freys. That’s presented as a bad ass moment, that’s their view, so why would a fan realize, “but over here vengeance / unnecessary bloodshed is bad.” It’s careless storytelling, but D&D were also dishonest too. They included certain moments to justify the ending, but undermined it so fans wouldn't track it, rewrote characters to make them obsequious to Dany. And then they drowned it all in bs interviews / commentary, loads and loads of hype and marketing....they twisted it completely out of any discernible shape. Confusion is an understandable response to such contradictory nonsense. People I'm a fan of made sense of it, predicted it, but I do think y'all were lied to by the showrunners which annoys me to no end.

But I don’t know how to shake my attachment to D and the character I want her to be.

That's love though. I've experienced this so often in real life, wanting good for someone I care about, desperately wanting them to see the self-destructive patterns they have, and not being able to get them to change anything and learning to either accept where they are/who they are, or learning, I can't accept it and ending the relationship because it wasn't healthy for me to be involved. Martin loves his villains, Tyrion is his fav, he wants you to care, that's where he'll get the tragedy in Dany's ending rather than it simply being a clear cut good vs evil ending. I think he wants us to have sympathy on both sides of the coming struggle, and to have fans see the heroic path Dany could have and watch her fail to follow it and walk down a path she didn't have to choose...it's gonna make it heart-wrenching rather than cliche. I think you may be almost just where Martin wants you.

I think perhaps because Sansa’s arc has not yet had as much direct payoff. She has not yet been able to claim power in the way D has and I think thus identifying myself with her may cast a light on uncomfortable feelings of helplessness within myself. But I’m not really sure.

Obviously, I don't know you, but from what I've seen people write about Sansa, I do think her relative powerlessness is a major detractor for fans. For some it makes her boring, for others, they despise her because they're so frustrated by her not doing something. But it's a dose of reality in this fantasy world to have a character constrained by her situation and her life dictated by her gender. I'd argue that Sansa is a more impressive character for the mercy and bravery she shows even thought she is a captive herself, but I understand that's not as thrilling as other characters' stories.

I want to love Jonsa instead of JxD

Sansa has had a few crushes which are fairly...I’ll say, detached from reality. She connects to the characters emotionally by imagining them as romantic figures, less a tangible knowing and loving the individual. It’s all very daydreamy, but mainly, she's been the object of desire for creeps. So, while I disagree with them, there is a part of me that understands why fans aren't looking for her to have an actual romance because the way it has existed in her story thus far isn't tangible for her or rewarding, and of course, there's her age. Dany on the other hand, as young as she was when this story began, has had sexual partners she loves. We say Drogo was an abusive POS, we know Daario doesn't truly care for her, so I understand, with one part of my mind, that fans are looking for her to have a mutual, sexual relationship. If you love Dany, a healthy sexual relationship feels more pressing than one for Sansa, due to past experiences. It feels more appropriate due to her age as well. So, I understand why one can have hooks for you as a fan that the next doesn't. It’s always good to remember though, while we connect to these characters as if they’re people, the author is using them to discuss ideas, and they will experience, or not experience, certain things as a result.

I feel very conflicted and I know I’ll get hate if I post this on my blog but I just want feedback.

I'd like to tell you that isn't the case, but it's probably true. I still get rude messages because I'm a Sansa fan/Jonsa, and I can't imagine a situation like yours, loving both characters and being open to Jonsa but shipping J/D, would allow you to be fully comfortable anywhere. I can't assure you that my corner of the fandom will treat you with the utmost understanding either, so I'm glad you reached out this way and felt safe coming into my inbox. I find talking about things is helpful. There isn't always an answer, but it makes me feel better, so I'm happy to read your thoughts on this even if I can't offer any advice, in the hopes it makes you feel better too. 💗