#should MAYBE tell u something about this fandom. just a thought.
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notashadowbutawave · 3 days ago
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finally talked my wife into watching 8x06 "confessions" with me and WOW there's quite a lot going on in this breakup scene in buck's apartment (and the infamous glee scene for that matter) that I haven't seen discussed much on this website (though maybe I'm just not finding it?) like this show is always yelling the themes in your face but...
first of all I think it's somewhat intentional that Buck is being written as kind of regressing. So far in the show, he's gotten his confidence in romantic relationships by fulfilling the role with the person that he thinks he should fulfill. with Abby, Buck had just learned about serious adult romantic relationships and how they work and was trying to Be A Partner in a complete speed run. But he learned that no amount of devotion is a substitute for functionality. with Taylor, he was trying to Be A Functional Partner - and he learned that being a partner Has To involve trust, and that trust comes from somewhere else other than just our actions - it has to come from our hearts.
Tommy is the first person he's ever dated where he doesn't know what the next steps are and that's because this isn't something he has a blueprint for - being a Partner and a Functional Partner for somebody who sees right through him and sees exactly what he's trying to do, to make Tommy never leave. Abby was completely clueless (sorry I really dislike Abby) and Taylor didn't realize that an adult man could behave so badly without utter malice in his heart. Both of them kind of make the mistake of being vulnerable to Buck's charms.
Tommy is of course vulnerable to Buck's charms but Buck is more transparently himself with Tommy as well - and what Tommy sees, then, is a person who is deeply insecure and may be trending in the right direction but ultimately still thinks there's a lever he can pull to make Tommy stay and never leave him. He doesn't know that he's not done cooking yet because every new thing he learns about the world or others makes him feel brand fucking new.
So yes, the glee scene:
Josh was absolutely gagged that Tommy was Abby's ex fiance
Buck's first instinct is to see the situation from Abby's side and go into protective mode which is adorably loyal to be fair but also like ; get a grip
I actually love Josh's framing of "you care about this person and if you want a future in a queer relationship you need to learn that we don't all come to this the same way"
Did they need a cultural reference? No. Were they going to self referentially congratulate Ryan Murphy for inflicting it on the world? Yes.
And regarding the breakup itself:
What is wrong with this fandom's sense of humor that I haven't seen a gif of "I'm the himbo" ??? Like yes babe u sure are come here
Buck is really working so hard in this scene to make sure Tommy knows that he's serious. He's like... this freaked me out but I've decided I'm cool with it. She changed my life but not like you !!!
Like bless his heart, Buck thought he was really doing the right thing by telling Tommy about Abby BEFORE ASKING HIM TO MOVE IN WITH HIM. like MY CARDS ARE ON THE TABLE??? SEE??? LOVE ME FOREVER !! it's adorable and it's also cringe as fuck.
I think the real sin of the writing here is making Buck so completely clueless that this is the wrong move. Like he's kind of an idiot (Eddie Diaz's words not mine) but moving in with someone after dating them for six months in your 30s is WILD behavior and I don't think even Evan Buckley would fail to realize that this is a bit much in this moment.
But idk being in love makes one do stupid things? I did all of my messy bitch relationship shit before I turned 30 but I guess it is buck we are talking about
I completely understand why Tommy reacts the way he does in this scene and bless Lou Ferrigno Jr for acting it with such nuance, much more depth than the scene frankly deserves. What a heartbreaker. Like you see him tense up at Buck's request
"I'm not saying let's get married or engaged, even though we would have the right, thanks to the brave people who came before, including you." such an insane thing to say to your boyfriend. Whoever approved this script was trying to take me out like with a gun.
You then see the absolute grief in Tommy's eyes like oh god this kid is killing me. He's so sweet. He's so cute. He doesn't get it. I love him. He doesn't get it.
As an aside, Eddie being stalked in the juice bar by the hot priest was absolutely incredible.
I didn't hate this episode but wow the writing does suck shit, however I fully believe it makes sense for them to break up here and get back together in the future ??? because Buck DOES have some shit to figure out. Like moving in with someone is a lot of fucking intimacy REALLY fast and baby boy sometimes you NEED to pump the brakes a little ESPECIALLY when you think someone might be THE ONE and you just figured out you like guys six months ago.
I get it and yeah the writing is tragic and the inclusion of Abby in general is just unhinged and unnecessary but like I don't hate the broad strokes here. how else does the blorbo learn if not by ritual torture by the writers. Lou is too good to not have back though. My god what a treasure.
end bucktommy endgame truther transmission
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kami-kun1003 · 6 months ago
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ok one more opinion before i go to bed: this fandom needs more fat headcanons. only one i’ve EVER seen is Azul and considering how his whole backstory is that he developed trauma and an eating disorder from being called fat and wants to stay skinny,,,,,,, it just doesn’t sit right w me no hate but im not a fan
what abt fat Cater? fat Floyd? fat Epel? fat Idia?????
i just want some fat representation pls i am begging uo guys 🙏
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snailsgoingdowntown · 12 days ago
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Help, I Reincarnated as the Female Lead’s Sister-in-Law!
1  2  3  4  5  6 8 9 10
Chapter 7
‘Slight’ Yandere! Dion Agriche x Fem! Reader
Arranged marriage AU
Warnings: themes of obsession and maybe possessiveness, implied thought of suicide once (1), toxic relationship/marriage, slight themes of misogynistic society (??? Probably???), implied guilt and regret, ooc Dion. Please tell me if I missed anything.
NSFW warnings: sexual fantasies (Dion: implied unprotected sex, unprotected frottage, oral (fem receiving), clit stimulation, mention of fingering), one (1) dry hump, teasing, mention/implied masturbation, offers of oral (male receiving) and handjob, slightly sexually frustrated Dion (he might die if u don’t kiss him eventually), mention/implications of non-con twice (2) (no he does not non-con you), DUB-CON. Please tell me if I missed anything.
NOTE: I gave the Reader’s brother a name because I dislike writing (family member’s name) unless it’s like the parents. Probably. Also going to tag this as smut just in case.
Main story is slightly different from the drabbles for reasons.
DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT CONDONE ANY OF THE HARMFUL AND/OR DANGEROUS/TOXIC ACTIONS AND/OR BEHAVIORS THAT MAY TAKE PLACE IN THIS PIECE OF FICTION. THESE ACTIONS/BEHAVIORS SHOULD NOT BE NORMALIZED AS THEY ARE BOTH EXTREMELY TOXIC AND DANGEROUS.
MINORS/BLANK BLOGS/BLOGS THAT DO NOT INTERACT WITH/REBLOG WITH FANDOM STUFF DNI AND PLEASE DO NOT SPAM LIKE MY POSTS. 
= = =
Something throbs against your bottom.
Breath catching in your throat, your heartbeat speeds up. Your husband doesn’t make any attempt to move, still hovering above you. He’s so close that you could feel his chest against your back with each and every exhale. Despite his
 bodily reaction, he doesn’t grind against you. Doesn’t nibble on your ear or slide his hands until they’re groping at your chest, lifting you enough to do so. 
No, he just stays and his breath makes your ear tingle. You need to get out of this.
“H-hey
 mind getting off? I need to change
” You wiggle a bit, aiming to escape his one-sided ‘embrace,’ if you could even call it that. Only to immediately stop once he hisses through his teeth, one hand flying to hold your hips still. You cease all actions and breathing becomes difficult. 
All is silent. 
The air becomes heavy and awkward. You dare not move. The risk of rubbing against him is high and you’d rather avoid giving him the wrong idea. Ah, but how should you go about this situation? You can’t exactly move and begging would elicit a less than desirable response from him - he likes seeing you cry, so begging might give him the same thrill. 
Seconds feel like minutes and minutes like hours. Dion doesn’t move against you nor away from you. However, his fingers dig into your hip, and you hold back the whimper from the sharp pain caused by his grasp. You’re stuck and don’t know how to escape. 

but he is your husband. You don’t want to do that again, to be used as a fleshlight as he enjoys himself while you shake in his arms from the pain. It was humiliating. Awful. 
But your mother would tell you to go along with it. Lant would expect it. Your sister would comfort you, saying that it’s only natural, normal for married couples to engage in sexual intercourse. As for your father
 he was always too awkward to discuss the subject. 
Besides, you already told him that you refuse to go through it again. That he could jack off and you would shove his sperm into your cunt so it could reach your fertile womb. 
You also don’t want to give birth to his child. However, you had no say so in that area - a child should be the result of any marriage. You scowl. While things were different in your old, modern world, things were vastly different here. A child was expected, needed in most cases. 
And this was one of them. 
His cock throbs again. 

 you could offer to jerk him off again. Maybe use your mouth if you’re feeling daring, suck on and twirl your tongue around the tip as your hands work the shaft. You’ll even swallow if it means he’ll stay far, far away from your cunt. It doesn’t matter if his cum is bitter and sour. 
When he throbs against you for the third time, you bring up your offer, your voice faltering with each word. When he takes a sharp breath, you know that you signed your death certificate. If accepted, you won’t be able to turn back.   
Wasn’t Dion Agriche supposed to be immune to sexual desires? From what you saw from spoilers, he was dense when it came to romance, so why was he acting this way? 
then again, nothing about this was romantic. 
“I don’t need it.” was his response. In spite of that, he doesn’t move, voice husky and dripping with lust. You despise yourself for the shiver running down your body while your ear tingles as his breath hits it. It seems that you’re also weak to physical pleasure regardless of your wariness and fear. 
If only your body was more receptive last night. 
“Then why are you still on me? Holding my hip no less.” If your head wasn’t so fuzzy with sleep, if today had gone in a less confusing direction, would you still act the same? Or would you stay quiet as a mouse, waiting for Dion to take you while your stomach churns and you swallow bile down?
“To stop you from squirming,” he deadpans like his fingers weren’t digging into your poor hip. 
“And your hand around my throat?” 
“To see your reaction.” 
This isn’t going anywhere. You’re just running in circles as the man denies himself and keeps you in purgatory. Can’t somebody knock on the door, forcing him to get up and leave?
You think you should be more scared. You are, but it melts into something worse than annoyance. Why can’t he let you sleep? Leave you alone and pretend you don’t exist. 
“You didn’t tell me why you’re still on top of me,” pointing out as you lift your shoulder the slightest bit, silently telling him to get out of your personal space. After a pause he lets go of your neck, hoisting himself up a bit. It’s not much, but at least he isn’t as close. 
He throbs against you a fourth time. 
Please, please for the love of everything that is holy, let him calm down. No sane man would get horny after saying such awful things. 
You forgot he wasn’t sane. 
“Your reactions are interesting.” 
“... Well, you saw them - that should be enough, no?” You’re debating if you should headbut him. Tomorrow, you’re going to question your own sanity, wondering what gave you the bravery of becoming so bold. Chucking yourself into the nearest river won’t be enough. 
Time stops when your husband’s thumb starts rubbing circles into your hip. It’s gentle but suggestive all the same. No, no, no - you don’t want to fuck him again. You don’t want to bare yourself to him, to allow his fingers to rub at your clit as he thrusts in and out of your most sensitive area. You don’t want him to lick your twitching clit or tug his hair as he eats you out again. 
It was too much, too painful. 
You already told him as such. 
“D-D-Dion.” You hate how your voice shakes, choking on his name. You hate how loud your gulp is. You hate how you’re going to offer your mouth and hands to him again. You hate the fact that you’re going to sit back and act how your mother and sister told you to. 
He hums, hand moving from your hip to your back, tracing your spine again. You fail in holding back the small gasp that slips through. How is it possible for him to get harder just from that!? 
Your toes curl as he gives a small hump, only to harshly stiffen. Did he not mean to do that? 
“A-as long as we don’t
 do it, then I’ll be happy to help you.” His hips struggle to stay still at your words, your husband clearly getting excited. He shouldn’t be like this. He should have left you alone and obsess over Roxana. 
But your gut is telling you that you switched places with her. That can’t be true though - he’s just playing with you for now. Raising your hopes up that he’ll be a ‘decent’ husband only to shatter the illusion once he gets tired of you. Honestly, after giving it some thought, you’re not sure which one is worse. 
“You have a lot of trouble with saying the word ‘sex’. It’s cute.” Dion muses, deciding to break his promise of not touching you further by ghosting his lips along the back of your neck, stopping between your shoulder blades. 
“M-mmh
 You promised not to touch,” you shakily breath out, ignoring how he called you ‘cute.’ Your toes curl again, chest heaving a bit as you force your breathing to stay steady. Fingers digging into the sheets, your head starts to feel dizzy - he’s being much more intimate, choosing to be teasing and lover-like. 
How long has it been since you tingle down there? You hate it, hate how his touches are starting to set the mood. It’s despicable.
“You also said you didn’t come here for this.” 
“People are allowed to change their minds.” Your husband doesn’t go further than this. You wonder what his expression is. What he’s thinking while scared of the reality of everything. Should you be direct with your refusal? Would he even care? Bother to listen? 
Breathing in, you decide to test your luck. 
“But I haven’t.” Again, he stays practically glued to you. “So, please.” Unable to finish, you only shut your eyes tight, praying to whatever God that would listen. After what seems like hours he completely removes himself from you. Relief fills you as you’re freed, air easier to take in. 
It slightly irks you when he doesn’t apologize. The moment you wake up tomorrow, dawn breaking and memories fresh, you might consider killing yourself. To avoid any possible harsh and inhuman punishment Dion may give you for rejecting him. But tonight, right now as your head is fuzzy and your body falling victim to sleep, you couldn’t care less. 
You’re just happy and grateful he listened. 
Now only your body would do the same. 
“You should change and sleep.” No emotion in his voice. Remorse, guilt, annoyance, hatred - nonexistent. You are a bit worried about it but you can only close your eyes. Thinking is becoming hard.
How can you talk to him so freely? Minutes ago you were scared that the man would rape you. Yet now you’re back to being fine? Madness really is contagious. 
“I don’t think I can
 that’s not an invitation.” Making your thoughts and expectations clear, you think you can faintly hear the scolding of your mother. You’ll fret over tonight later.
The world ceases to exist around you, falling into the abyss before you could hear him sigh.  
- - -
He was hoping you would change your mind. The most painful part was over with - as long as he took his time with you, it shouldn’t hurt as much. 
He would have played with your clit until you were whining for his fingers.  To flick the nub back and forth with his tongue until you complain, saying he was being unfair. To rub the tip of his cock against both your entrance and clit until your hips were bucking against him, trying to slip him in. 
But dreams don't always come true. 
Dion accepted as such, realizing that it was far too early to have sex again anytime soon. He could live without it. For a while. Hopefully the same goes for you, otherwise

Well, his left arm would suffer a lot. 

 this isn’t like him. It’s strange and confuses him. You confuse him. But the questions could be saved for later, when his own eyes aren’t becoming heavy with sleep deprivation, the eye bags getting worse. 
He looks at your sleeping figure, halfway undone dress and corset still on. He considers stripping and changing you into the silk nightgown that he threw onto your back earlier. But seeing how the interaction from earlier went, he decides against it. 
He should call for Hana. 
Scarlet eyes stare hard at you. You look so comfortable, so peaceful - he wants to ruin it. Yet, at the same time, he wants to leave you be, to have a moment of peace in this hell. Your husband settles for the latter. Consideration sometimes overwrites sadistic pleasures. 

 something really is wrong with him. He wasn’t raised with consideration in mind yet here he is. 
Walking to the closet, opening the doors and picking nightclothes at random, Dion wonders how bad you’ll freak out tomorrow. If you’ll cry and beg for forgiveness once you’re able to talk and think. Or if you’ll play pretend and give him a nervous smile once the shock wears off. 
Maybe when he closes his eyes and slips into the dreamworld, he’ll be blessed with a dream of where you’ll accept him as is, faults and all. But as Dion slips his shirt on, he knows it’s next to impossible. 
For tomorrow, when you wake up to his sleeping face, you’ll find an isolated corner to hide in. Tonight will only be looked back on with regret filling your mind. 
That’s how it always starts. 
- - -
“Is it too early to write to sister?” a boyish voice asks. Your father looks up from his paperwork, heavy bags under his eyes. Standing in front of his desk in his office stands your brother - (e/c) eyes filled with impatience and worry. His hands are behind his back, nails digging into skin. 
The twelve-year-old boy has to physically stop himself from grabbing your father by the shoulders and shake him, demanding answers. Out of every man to marry you to, every family to give you to
 why did he choose the worst of the worst? 
Weren’t there any better options? 
Your father goes back to his paperwork, pen gliding across the sheets. “It’s not, but be mindful of your words. No need to give your sister more stress. God knows she’s already tipping on the verge of insanity.” 
He doesn’t see the point in lying. Everyone with a brain knows he basically sent you to your early grave - it was only a matter of time until the Agriche family drives you crazy. And that’s putting it lightly. 
His reputation as a man and father has been ruined beyond belief. In spite of that, many still pitied him, rumors going around that he was forced to give you away. Others say that he wanted a bit of the power your new in-laws would lend him after the marriage. However, no-one would dare to ask him directly. 
“... am I supposed to wish her luck on her new happy marriage? Or should I tell her how lucky she is to get sold into such a wealthy and warm family?” 
Slam!
“Zachary (Last name)! Enough. This is a political matter; you won’t understand until you get older.” Your father slammed his palms against the surface of the desk, papers flying and pen dropping to the floor. It rolls under the desk. 
“Understand
? What is there to understand? Anyone with a brain cell knows that she won’t last long. Maybe a month if she’s lucky.” Zachary argues back, stomping towards the desk. A staring contest breaks out between the two males - your father is the first to look away. 
Running a hand through his greying hair, he heavily breathes out. “Everything will
 work out.” 
“Work out? What do you mean by that? This isn’t some experiment -” 
“Listen,” your father leaves his position to walk towards your brother, grabbing his shoulders. “Your sister is strong. There is no need to worry.” 
“She’s as strong as a single match.” 
“That’s just rude. But yes, she won’t go crazy
 immediately.” 
“You just said she’s tipping on the verge of insanity.” 
“It’s a figure of speech.” 
The argument goes nowhere, both males refusing to back down. Your brother was always hard headed - this wasn’t the first argument that has broken out between father and son, nor will it be the last. However, the context of this one is grave. It involves you. 
“Zac,” your father affectionately refers to him by his nickname, “it’s good that you’re worried about your sister. I’m worried too; but now is not the time to think the worst. Right now, you should offer her support
  cheer her up.” 
What a lousy way of pushing aside the pressing issue. 
Zac doesn’t say anything. In the end, he sighs before nodding his head. “Alright. I understand, father.” 
Your father accepts his answer. “Good. Now, like I said, do be mindful of what you write. Right now is a sensitive time.” 
‘Which means that the Agriche family is going to read through the letter first before giving it to her,’ Zac thinks. Alright, fine. That’s fine. 
Not like he practiced writing sugary words with hidden meanings the moment he heard of your engagement. With a teacher he hates but still followed regardless. The results of his teaching better yield positive results. For everyone’s safety - especially your brother’s. 
“I’ll tell her how you cried for two hours straight.” 
“...Zachary.” 
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kevinsdsy · 7 months ago
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saw u respond to another anon about kevin and i ABSOLUTELY LOVE KEVIN so i thought id drop this in here: hot take (I think?) but i feel like this fandom frequently royally misinterprets kevin. hes often interpreted as cold and not really having much outside of exy, but honestly i think that hes actually pretty sweet, but you just have to look closely for it. Maybe not in words, but rather, in how he uses exy a lot of the time to show how he cares, and relates it back to things that he's experienced in the world. Which, of course, because exy was literally his entire world growing up. I'd be a bit surprised if he out grew it, due to so much of his self worth being contingent on it. Its rather subtle, but its certainly there. For example, him fretting over what people eat. someone might interpret it as "oh, kevin's crazy obsessed with exy" but its more so kevin being concerned about his teammates health, and by proxy, his teammates.
IDK i just think hes neat and not quite as one dimensional as i see some people make him out to be. curious to see your thoughts :) have a good day!
when i tell you I AGREE SO MUCH !! i mean sure he can be a little bitch (<333 i say this lovingly i LOVE little bitches), but he is not cold. honestly if i had been stuck in the nest as long as kevin had i would have been a menace to society i fear and kevin comes out of that nest; not even knowing the extend of his trauma and he's soft.
i mean like i said in the other post, he's not necessarily soft with his words, but he is soft in his actions. he calls neil an idiot for saying he's fine after he gets hurt during a game and tells neil when he gets hurt he's supposed to take it easy and take care of himself.
when he finds out neil is the butcher's son and will most likely die by the end of the season he does not call neil a waste of time. when he recruited neil he was so determined to make neil court so when neil asks him: "will you still teach me?" kevin does not turn his back on him and promises neil he will teach him every night.
jean FINALLY gets out of the nest and without jean asking (jean would never dare to have asked or even think it a possibility) kevin finds him a new team. a team that's so opposite of what the ravens were. a place that's gentle and understanding and has patience.
not to mention this part from the extra content which is SO IMPORTANT to me and i should dissect all on it’s own one day because i swear there’s something about him keeping his books under his bed and pillow, trying to read as much as he can whenever het gets the chance that could be connected to love and tenderness
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melrosing · 9 months ago
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Do you think Jaime sincerely regrets what he does to Bran despite only thinking of it once?
ya of course. I think something that maybe needs to be said more often (particularly regarding Jaime’s POV but also broadly applies to others) is that you are not always going to see a character doing the workings that lead them from point A to point B. you have to fill in some of the gaps yourself and surmise the changes in thinking that have taken place offscreen.
The Jaime and Bran thing is a good example of this. we can gather from the scene in which the push takes place that this isn’t something Jaime wanted to do, but felt compelled to: he helps Bran up when he initially falls, and when he asks Bran his age etc a reader can gather when rereading the scene that this is Jaime trying to make time as he deliberates what he’s going to do next. then ‘the things I do for love’ is said with ‘loathing’. already we have plenty to determine that Jaime was not happy w this line of action, but felt he needed to take it.
then we get the AGOT-early ASOS scenes where Jaime comes across as a cut and dry villain and does nothing to help himself, half-jesting to Bran’s own mother about what he did and demonstrating no remorse whatsoever. shocking on first read but a rereader should be able to go back based on what they learn of Jaime later on and realise that he talks differently to what he feels, and maintains this darkly careless front specifically to avoid digging up his true feelings on difficult subjects. this is made apparent over and over again.
then there’s a big gap where Bran is neither mentioned nor thought about by Jaime, when suddenly right towards the end of the book he declares himself ashamed of what he did. so now the reader realises that Jaime has been thinking about what he did, even whilst we haven’t read those thoughts. and then looking at how the act was performed in the first place, we can realise he’s always been ashamed of what he did, has just been telling himself and others differently for his own complex reasons.
I think there are a lot of people who can’t accept that character work sometimes takes place off the page as well as on it, and a character won’t always declare every step they take in a new direction, but sometimes a certain line here or there will tell you that that work has been taking place. if executed well, this is just good writing: it’s boring having the writer spell everything out for you, good books should feel like you’re working with the writer to build the full story.
a lot of people do want it spelt out though lol, you see that a lot with discussions re Jaime, because I’d say he’s maybe the most ‘show don’t tell’ character in the series. and like I always say this isn’t fuckin Paradise Lost or whatever you do not need a degree to crack it but idk like. reading is a skill?? spend any amount of time in asoiaf fandom and truly u will realise that some people just. well they haven’t honed that skill yet lol
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bluestjayy · 2 months ago
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fck stop begging for comments on here all the damn time. i did like u as a writer but its getting so pathetic and annoying now jus begging constantly. Ur writing isn't that good for getting tonnes of comments anyway half the time Ur dragging plots and characters r so uninteresting probs coz Ur on here begging instead of writing properly. every update feels rushed lately it shows u don't even care anymore. just stop begging and focus on updating instead that's all pppl want
Hey anon, I normally don't respond to rude asks like these because I think what you want is the attention.
I especially don't usually respond to asks that have, in any way, anything to do with begging or demanding I update my fics (and I have seen an uptick in those in recent months) but I'm gonna respond to this one, and by proxy, all the others currently sitting unread in my inbox, and any future asks of this nature that may come my way.
Buckle in, this is a long one.
First, I'm going to assume by 'begging for comments' you mean the few posts I have been reblogging over the past couple of days that encourage readers on AO3 to engage with authors by leaving positive and thoughtful comments, and discouraging them from making unreasonable and impersonal demands. If this is the case then I would like to clarify that I am not 'begging for comments', rather I am supporting a community of writers like myself who are actual human beings who take several hours, days, even weeks, out of our very real lives in order to make something and share it with the world and for some reason are beginning to see a trend of entitlement slowly growing across our comment sections. A trend we wish to nip in the bud because, as I previously pointed out, fanfiction authors are real life human beings, taking time out of their days to make something, not machines on a factory line that churn out content at the behest of someone's demands. We want our fandoms and communities to be safe, supportive spaces where we can have fun. We don't want them to become workloads that begin to feel like full time jobs.
Secondly, to say my writing isn't all that good but in the same message tell me to update? Wild my guy. Truly. But let's keep breaking down AO3 comments/kudos/general feedback (such as this delightful ask you sent my way, I guess hoping it would make me want to update??) from readers and how this can affect an authors updates, this time using one of my favourite metaphors for this type of thing and see if it helps:
AO3 is a potluck. It's a backyard party. There is a veritable buffet at this party. My fic is the cake I baked myself to bring for all my friends to eat. One of my other friends brought potato salad. Another friend brought the punch. Everyone who is at this fun get-together brought something to offer at the buffet table.
Now, I might not like potato salad, but you know what I'm not going to do? Tell my friend to her face that her potato salad sucks and she never should have brought it. I'm going to politely pass on eating it, and be glad that all the people at the party who do like potato salad have something to eat. In the same vein, not everyone is going to like my cake, maybe the flavour is wrong, maybe I used too much icing, maybe they just don't like cake. But that's fine, they don't have to eat my cake. But if you choose to eat my cake, and find you don't like the flavour after taking a bite, then the polite thing to do is quietly stop eating the cake, and go and find something else to eat.
Do not seek me out and tell me to my face everything that was wrong with my cake, and why you don't enjoy it. Do not tell me to my face, that my cake sucks and you wish I'd never brought it.
Do you think telling someone that you hate the way they made a cake is a good and productive way to get them to keep making cakes for you? Or perhaps, is the way to keep an amateur baker wanting to bake, to tell them what you enjoyed about their cake. Even a simple, 'I really liked this cake' goes a long way.
And if you do like my cake, if you love my cake actually, do not then follow me home from the party and start demanding I make you cake all the time. I don't always have time to make cakes.
And just to cover all of my bases, because I am also seeing a trend of folk who think that sharing fanfiction online is the same as submitting manuscripts to publishers and that therefore criticism is allowed. It's not.
To continue to beat this cake metaphor. This is the difference between taking my cake to a party with friends (AO3) and taking my cake onto the Great British Bake off (A professional publishing environment).
If I wanted constructive criticism on my cake, I'd seek it out from expert bakers who know what they're talking about.
No one goes to a friend's party with a cake they made and wants to hear what they're doing wrong. Unless explicitly asked, keep your criticisms to yourself and put the cake down if you don't like it. It's so very easy to not eat a cake if you hate how it tastes.
Finally, a combination of both the points above, really, but I cannot stress this enough. These usernames you're sending anonymous asks to? The handles on AO3 you're writing comments for? They're people. They are human fucking beings that deserve respect and kindness. I am a human being. And sending what you sent up there to another person over fanfiction?? That's just mean, friend. That's just out and out cruelty. I have no other words to describe that.
I could give a flying fuck if you think I'm begging for comments. I could care less you wanna say my writing is terrible. At the end of the day, my writing is mine and I'm going to keep doing it because I find writing fun. It's a hobby that helps me de-stress from the horrors of my real life situations. Frankly, you should be begging me to stop because I have no plans to do anything but keep inflicting my drawn out plots and bad character writing on the world for as long as it keeps making me happy.
But I beg you to take a second off of social media today and think over what makes fandom- something that should be a hobby, a safe place to escape from the world- this serious for you. Because the kicker in all this? My friend, if you think what I post is annoying and my writing is bad, you can not see it. You can block me. You can click away from my stories. Your online space is yours to curate and no one, literally not a single person, is making you engage with things you don't want to engage with. Curate your space, fill it with people who aren't 'begging for comments', fill it with fics you think are really good and deserve to be told how good they are through wonderful comments. Please, I am begging you, because at the end of the day to live in such negativity must be so exhausting for you.
I've no idea if you, the original sender of this message will even read through all of this, but if you did, please, if not me, then any other fandom creators you come across going forward. Please treat them with kindness. Please respect that sometimes fandoms are spaces people hide in when their real lives are scary and frustrating and negative enough and all you do with messages like these is drive people away.
TL;DR: this is not the way you get more updates from fic authors, and further from that, it's not the way you treat anyone. Ever. Do better. Do much better.
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ranahan · 2 months ago
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Had you talked about the whole eyn/te/haar thing at some point?
I don’t think so! I didn’t have anything prepared, and don’t have very strong opinions one way or another, but here are some thoughts anyway. Feel free to add more if you have more/other ideas.
So Mando’a has three articles: eyn, te, and haar. Articles in Mando’a don’t seem mandatory like the articles in e.g. English; you can drop them. So of course the question is when you should use them and when drop them then?
Eyn is the indefinite article, like English a/an. In creole languages (I headcanon that Mando’a is one), the indefinite article often develops from the numeral one in the lexicaliser language. I think that would make sense for Mando’a too, that eyn in (some, at least older) compound words would stand for “one.” So I headcanon that eyn is the numeral one in Classical Mando’a, which gives Modern Mando’a one more creole feature.
And then we have two definite articles
 which obviously results in asking what’s the difference and how are they used?
Te is your ordinary definite article, like English the, I guess. Haar, I think, is etymologically related to e.g. haat, so the original meaning might be something like “the one (and only),” or “the true.” Haar might also be a part of some compounds, but it’s difficult to tell apart from e.g. haat because of Mando’a’s habit of eliding consonants when joining together morphemes.
Okay, that’s a cool enough a system, I guess. But you know my whole shtick with Mando’a grammar is taking the pieces and interpreting them in a way that is not like English. So I want to go a bit deeper, and in any case we have a couple of unanswered questions, so let’s look at some natural languages and different ways they use articles and see if anything catches.
Different kinds of articles in natural languages
Clearly Mando’a’s system is not just English’s indefinite/definite distinction, since Mando’a has a three different articles. But there are other kinds of articles as well.
There’s partitive article, which is a type of indefinite article used with mass nouns. Like “some water,” only instead of “some,” you’d have an indefinite article. Maybe you could also use eyn this way? Eyn pirun, some water/a water/a drink. (Eh, I have no idea how Mando’a handles mass/count nouns.)
If you can have an indefinite noun without an article, or you can specify an indefinite article, wouldn’t the latter be the equivalent of saying “some dude, I don’t know which,” which is another sense of “some.”
Obviously the two different senses of “some” happen to belong to the same word in English (but not necessarily in other languages). But I think many of the adoptees who would have contributed to Mando’a’s creolisation would have spoken Basic. And the other way a language can contribute to a creole is by replicating grammatical structures or senses of words. Now obviously we don’t want to recreate English senses all over because that would just create a complicated cipher for English. But it does compel me when I can do it in a way that produces an end result that is not like English, haha.
I like to imagine (that Traviss imagined that) there were a bunch of working class folks from the Northeast of the Galactic Republic, and a bunch of soldierly types, who got absorbed into the mando armies at some point during their Imperial days, and left behind some dialectal Basic words (yaim, birgaan, taabir, etc) and some specific ways of using words (which might be not much like the prestige dialect of Basic).
Some languages use the partitive article to refer to a part of something or a member of a group, but in Mando’a this kind of a meaning seems to already exist in the suffix -b/ab/eb (or -il in some fandom dialects).
Te reo Māori has a proper article, meaning the noun it refers to is a unique entity. (Oceanic languages btw have a pretty elaborate systems of possession and classification of nouns that defines how they are possessed.) The proper article might be used to refer to proper nouns (the Azores) or names.
And well hey, we seem to have an article which means “the true one,” so something like this might be a good fit. So maybe it ought to be Mand’alor haar Ani’la (not te Ani’la) and haar Yaim’ol (The Return, as in the historical movement)?
There’s negative article, which basically does the same job as English no in sentences like “no man can kill me.” Mando’a would probably just use the negative particle here though.
And then there’s zero article. So a language might make the same distinction as English does with a/the with no article (indefinite)/article (definite). English actually uses this for mass nouns. But I don’t think this is what’s going on with Mando’a, since it has three different articles which are apparently just not mandatory (i.e. the lack of article is not grammatically significant, just depends on context of the conversation).
The distinction between the two definite articles could be one of distance (proximate/distal; this/that/yonder), but I don’t think that’s what Mando’a does either. I mean I love this feature, but unfortunately it doesn’t seem to exist in Mando’a.
And of course many languages have different articles for different noun classes (whether that’s masculine/feminine, or animate/inanimate, directly/indirectly possessed, count/mass nouns, or some other classification) and cases.
More ideas
One idea I like is that the distinction between eyn and te could be more about specificity than definiteness. So te could refer to a specific thing, whether it’s mentioned for the first time or not (hehe, more translation confusion!), and eyn could refer to any such thing. Oceanic languages do something like this, to the best of my understanding.
Te could also be used when speaking about general truths, or maybe general truths don’t require an article: Mando’ade draar digu. No article there.
Another idea I had at some point is that the articles could also be used sort of interchangeably with the demonstratives, so eyn could be translated as “some” or “any” and te as “this” or “that,” depending on context. So kind of like Finnish does: “anna mulle joku ase” vs. ”anna mulle se ase” (”give me some (any) weapon/that weapon”); more or less the same distinction as the specificity. Obviously Mando’a also has demonstratives, so this alone is not going to work.
One way I’ve been using te is in place of a possessive pronoun, when the owner is known from context. This avoids repeating the pronouns (kaysh te’habi be kaysh buy’ce) and feels a bit more natural to me (kaysh te’habi be te buy’ce). I stole this from Swedish.
Plurals? Maybe Mando’a uses the articles the same way regardless of whether they refer to a singular or plural. E.G. eyn jetiise would be “some jedi” and te jetiise would be “the jedi, those jedi, or that group of jedi.” Although of course it can make sense to restrict the article that means “one” to singular nouns, I kind of also like the idea that the demonstratives ibic/ibac can be both singular and plural (saw this somewhere on tumblr and didn’t write down where, ugh)—I think it would make sense to either have or not have the distinction but do it the same way for both articles and demonstratives.
And I kind of like the idea that in colloquial speech at least, te might get reduced to t’ in front of front vowels. T’eparav, the feasting; t’iviin, the speed.
tldr
Well, that’s a bunch of ideas. My gut feeling is I like the unspecific/specific distinction for eyn and te, the proper article for haar, and dropping the article for general truths and whenever the meaning is clear from context. So basically some/any (eyn), a specific one out of many (te), and a unique entity (haar). That feels about right. Although it would unfortunately mean retconning some established fandom practices, which I don’t like (I prefer to build around them, not over them whenever it makes sense to me).
Anyway, I’ll have to mull it over, and dig up some more stuff (do you know what you get when you search for “article”
), and come back to this some later day with a more coherent view. Hope this was at least a little like what you were asking for. If you have any better ideas/just different ones/thoughts/comments, please share!
P.s. your other question is excellent as well, I’ll answer it some other day when I have more time.
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babiebom · 1 year ago
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Heyy it's me again, lol. Ur criminal minds hcs for Reid were so good!! Thank u for blessing me. đŸ™ŒđŸ» I was wondering if ud be down to write maybe a one-shot or a drabble of Reid comforting a reader (I almost wrote reider bc I spaced out and like akjsldj) who just had friends leave them when they thought they were really close? I hope that's not too specific!! Thank you sm for blessing the world with ur writing. It literally makes my day so much brighter whenever you post. đŸ„°
A/N: CUTE!! Reider would be a really cute fandom name for him ngl. Also I’ve fallen out of contact with friends that I thought were gonna be in it for the long run with me but unfortunately it just didn’t work out that way even if we didn’t fall out. ALSO specifics are great with me because then it’s clear what I need to write and what you want me to write so don’t apologize!! Can you tell I don’t know how to comfort anyone?
Tw: some cursing, some abandonment issues, mentions of bullying within the friend group. Isolation, ghosting. Lmk if there’s something I should tag!
Genre: angst, one shot, some fluff
Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader (can be read platonically or romantically in think. Also can be read as gender neutral maybe?) if I added pronouns or descriptors let me know!!
Wc:1.3k
Criminal Minds Masterlist
It’s strange when you break up with a friend, even more so when the reason that you breakup is something stupid, something avoidable. It hurts even more when you get abandoned, ghosted by someone you thought would be in your life for the rest of it. No one ever prepares you for friendships ending. You get prepared for romantic relationships, death, and maybe sometimes you drift apart from friends but even then you’re prepared.
You stare at the group chat that had defined your childhood and teenage years. Stare at the names followed by “has left the chat” with a feeling in your heart that is only rivaled by death of a loved one if you remembered correctly. It had been a while.
It was a petty argument that only lasted a day, something about how everyone treated you. You regretted bringing it up on the first day that you had been ignored after sending a message. That day turned into a week which turned into them all leaving the group chat without telling you which hurt more than being kicked out of it. Did you really mean that little that they would ghost you that easily?
You never started arguments usually. You never even participated in them, trying to stay neutral in order to keep everyone happy. Always passive and agreeable and everyone liked you that way. The one time you have something to get off your chest
maybe you shouldn’t have said anything.
You tried to message one of your friends first, you hadn’t known her as long as some of the others in the group, but she was always sweet and didn’t seem like the type to ghost.
You 5:43 pm: Irene what happened? I saw you all left the group chat. Is something wrong?
You don’t get an answer back for an hour. And it makes your heart squeeze in your chest. It isn’t really an answer, but at the same time it answered both of your questions. To her you didn’t really matter all that much and something was really wrong.
Irene 7:01 pm: just leave me alone. You said what you needed to say, if you message me again I’ll block you.
You try again with a different friend. One you have known a little longer. One who had complained to you and confided in you and one that you thought you were close to than this.
He doesn’t answer at all, and neither do the other two that you message. Eventually you figure out that your messages never sent because you had been blocked. Going to their instagrams and twitters, everything is gone as soon as you click on them. Even their TikTok’s have nothing for you to look at.
Soon enough you’re fighting off tears, your chest tight and your stomach swirling. Was speaking up for yourself really worth this? Your head spins and your vision becomes blurry as you click on the last contact that’s available to you.
Your best friend. Having known her for the longest time out of all of them, you’d think she’d say something before doing something like this. You two met in elementary school, and were friends before the group got together. If you think about it more your friendship reminded you of the one in Jennifer’s Body. Except instead of saving everyone, you were being ignored and abandoned by the person you thought was going to be there even if everyone else wouldn’t. The person that you thought you could rely on.
But before you could message her, one came straight to you. The bubbles popping up as she’s typing something else. You can’t really understand the first paragraph, your mind to overwhelmed by the weeks events to be able to read.
Emilie 7:42 pm: I just wanted to message you before you tried anything with me. I’m honestly not interested in talking to you anymore after how you talked to me and my friends. None of us want you in the group anymore, and honestly it’s fucking pathetic that you’re reaching out and asking if anything is wrong when you’re the reason everyone was upset in the first place. Like you said we were shit friends, and now you wanna act like everything confuses you? If we were so shitty to you, why do you want us to still talk to you? I told Jacob, Josh, Irene, and Paisley to block you if you message them because honestly they don’t need you to try to beg and plead with them. You’re toxic and we’re done with you. Honestly, you look pathetic and desperate for attention messaging all of us like this. I’m not even gonna bother blocking you because it doesn’t really matter that much to me and maybe in the future I could be open to being friends again but for right now, I’m over it. Bye. You should do better.
Now the tears fall down your face, hot and burning as they trail down your cheeks and onto the screen of your phone. Going onto instagram to doom scroll your feelings away, you are immediately met with a photo of your friend group hanging out without you. Taken aback, you try to bring yourself to unfollow Emilie, to block her and effectively cut her out of your life while your wounds are fresh and your friendship is newly ended so you don’t have to torture yourself. But that’s exactly what you do, torture yourself. Instead of unfollowing her, deleting all of the pictures of her and your friend group from your feed, you scroll through them, the tears falling faster the longer you sit there and reminisce. You don’t even hear the front door open and close, and the only reason you know it did is because of the weight that causes you to lean towards the new person in the bed. Warmth blankets around you, the feeling of arms wrapped around your body brings you out of your mind.
Turning to look at the man next to you, you see that Spencer is looking at you as if you’re a wounded animal and it makes you burst out into tears. Maybe you really did look pathetic. “Oh no
what happened?”
You tried to explain, but couldn’t properly while you were blubbering. Instead you just throw your phone to him and let your head fall into your hands. He takes a literal second to read, then lets out a gust of air that usually meant he was surprised and didn’t know what to say.
He moves to hug you again, resting his head on top of yours. “You know
they say that it takes 200 hours to form a close friendship with someone. And when that friendship ends unexpectedly, it can cause a multitude of issues in the future with how you trust and open up to people
”
His ramblings weren’t all that comforting, but just hearing him speak made you start to feel better. Of course he would attempt to make things better by spouting facts that one hundred percent would make anyone else annoyed at him. You snuggle into his arms, nodding your head to show that you’re listening in between sobs. “S-so how long until I s-stop feeling like my h-heart is broken?” You ask. It did somehow feel like being broken up with, or having someone die.
“Well, most grief experts think that a year is a good estimate on how long it takes to get used to the loss of someone major in your life
”
“A year?” You whine, letting your head tilt backwards dramatically. “That’s too long!” It’s kind of a joke, the way you say it. But the way he looks at you lets you know that he knows you’re being somewhat serious.
“She was your best friend
of course it’s going to take some time to get used to not talking to her
however long you take to grieve is how long it’s going to take. It’s not a complete science.”
You nod, and hide your face in his chest. While you still felt like the Earth was ending, maybe it’s not ending right this second anymore.
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ca-suffit · 6 months ago
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what are your thoughts on lestat/gabrielle bc parent-child incest is always abuse yet sometimes it feels like fans treat that r/s and akashastat as jokes, maybe bc they can’t recognise female abusers or bc they don’t understand abusers (i.e. lestat) can be and often are victims of abuse themselves.
I already know this is gonna be a rly long reply bcuz there's a lot to talk about to answer this.
gonna put it under a cut for what the topics are. don't click if u don't want to read about incest and abuse obviously.
first, as I've said in other asks here and there, fandom does have a lot of problems with criticizing at least white women in fiction bcuz it's too much of a mirror held up to what fandom spaces are usually made up of to begin with. this is also why darker topics become jokes. it's all a way to create distance for engagement, whether the distance is not to look at urself or maybe ur own trauma (it's usually both here). I've seen a lot of this in the book side of the fandom over the years. it's also why lots of stuff is focused on surface level words ("it's gothic fiction," "they're all monsters") instead of any in depth exploration.
secondly, not to sound like a shitty book person, but incest *is* a major part of gothic fiction. the intention *is* to be repulsive, horrifying, and taboo. ppl should obviously take care to avoid topics that u find overwhelming and might harm ur mental health, but otherwise this *is* part of the genre.
lestat and gabrielle also....don't rly get that much into it tbh. the fandom makes it sound like more than it is. idk if the show is gonna make it more but I doubt it. although there was a dig about it in the trial script that I never saw anyone mention btw
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"if u want to kill ur lover, or fuck ur mother, it'll have to wait."
I personally find the shifting power dynamics between human life and vampire life to be rly interesting. I don't think it's something the books explored enough tbh. bcuz lestat and gabrielle are the only vampires who came from being a human parent and child to the child then becoming the vampire parent to his own fledgling vampire mother.
it's clear in their human life that their parent / child boundaries are fucked and tbh that's the worst part for me. especially bcuz the fandom doesn't want to explore that bcuz ppl don't like to criticize gabrielle, as mentioned above. her life is awful so ppl give her a pass a lot. but she starts off as the human parent and she's a p bad parent in a lot of ways tbh (cuz she never wanted to be one).
anyway. I always saw the vampiric era incest as a metaphor for their broken relationship otherwise. like I said before, the fandom makes it sound worse than what even happens too. they never fuck each other. at most they kiss and think or say things that are inappropriate about each other's bodies and their feelings towards it, but modern day stories have had a lot more brutal depictions of incestual relationships between mothers and sons tbh. not saying that to downplay it or say "get over it" or w/e but just to touch on that, cuz it does get weirdly annoying here about it sometimes. ppl act tough about their love of "gothic fiction" all day for other topics in the books that are rly more graphic than this, then act like this is the one thing that goes too far? It's fucking weird, although I have theories about why that happens too.
back to the point tho. they're kind of a "failure" mother and son in life, so that's how I tend to read why this happens in the first place. lestat wants a mother and gabrielle wants to be a man (she directly tells him at a point "u are the man in me").
this is from TVL, before he leaves for paris (when they're both still human)
"I tried to take her in my arms. She stiffened at first but then I felt her weaken and she melted against me, and she gave herself over so completely to me in that moment that I think I understood why she had always been so restrained. She cried, which I'd never heard her do. And I loved this moment for all its pain. I was ashamed of loving it, but I wouldn't let her go. I held her tightly, and maybe kissed her for all the times she'd never let me do it. We seemed for the moment like two parts of the same thing."
after he makes her a vampire, they're kissing each other a lot in that first night. lestat saved his mother from dying and created his first vampire, which he wasn't sure he could do, and she isn't sick anymore and has more freedom than she knows what to do with. she's no longer his human "mother" either. he mentions a lot in these moments that there's no hesitance when they kiss each other like there was before. bcuz they're both happier in their individual issues and this is how they can express that as vampires now. he feeds her blood from his mouth later on in their first night and it comes across like more of a nurturing action than something weird and sexual.
so there's obviously incestual themes present but, to me anyway, this always felt a lot more sad than anything. like they don't know how else to meet each other's needs so they do this as vampires to act out a type of intimacy that otherwise they don't rly have still?
but ya. lestat did not become who he is from nothing. both his parents were abusive in different ways and akasha abuses him too. he constantly has vampirism forced on him against his will and tries his best to ignore how it makes him feel, especially about his own body. he has a lot of trauma attached to how he looks too and it's a whole thing. gabrielle and magnus tap into that in ways too.
fandoms don't rly like to look at cycles of abuse bcuz it's easier to say someone is just "bad" than to feel like maybe ur a bad person too if u sympathize with them. that's why ppl here are working hard to usually make any of these characters either the abused or abuser, depending on which side they relate to the most. it's almost always a combination of both in everyone tho.
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itsjaywalkers · 9 months ago
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babe i miss ur rants like crazy so if u have any rant that needs to be indulged this is me indulging u <3333
this actually made me so soft.. i didn't know there was someone who enjoyed my rants so much.. i always feel kinda annoying.. i'm giving u the biggest forehead kiss in the world nonnie YOU'RE THE BEST
this being said . well
lately i've been thinking a lot about this band au i don't know if i'll ever write or if it'll just stay in my head, bc when i first started reading fanfiction i was OBSESSED with band aus and even tho i'm not that into them anymore . they make me feel very nostalgic and happy so i was like u know what . i should come up with my own. AND THAT'S WHAT I DID!!
anyways it's a dual pov, james and lily's!! they used to date, and since james is the lead singer in a very popular band, they were the it couple back then, everyone was fucking obsessed with them, said they were Perfect, peak romance, they wanted what they had etc etc. lily even sang with him sometimes when the band went on tour, bc she has a beautiful voice and all the fans kept pushing for her to join the band and sing all the ballads with james etc
but then . all of a sudden . she disappeared . not literally, you know, she just fucking ran away, without telling a single soul. she didn't even leave a letter to james, or maybe remus, who was one of her best friends. james was devastated, the band was devastated, the whole world was devastated. they went on hiatus for a lil before coming back with a very different vibe and since then . well . no one talks about lily evans . reporters try to bring her up every now and again bc they're nosy fuckers but james goes all stiff and his replies become stilted (even if still perfectly professional)
flashforward to . when the story actually starts . a new band has just debuted and it's rising to fame concernigly quick and james remus sirius and peter are going Crazy bc they feel a bit threatened and also oh would u look at that?? if it isn't sirius' estranged brother in the flesh!! playing the drums for this stupid band who's trying to compete with them!!
and if that wasn't enough !! lily finally returns to their lives............... she's also making a debut but as a soloist.............. and she's very Different from the lily they remember................... her songs are loud and aggressive and filled with resentment and very obviously about james and their relationship and james' friends. she's mean and bold and witty and everyone is Wondering if there was more to her disappearance than what they thought
it'll be jegulus and bartylily <3 and one of the reasons why idk if i'll ever write it it's bc one of the reasons why lily left is that she got pregnant and she didn't want it so she aborted and . we all know how this fandom gets about lily and motherhood lmao
anyways one of the scenes that's been plaguing my mind is this one that happens after lily and barty have started sleeping together and spending more and more time in each other's presence!! they're in barty's flat and barty wakes up at some point in the middle of the night just to discover he's alone in bed. so he wakes up and finds lily sitting at the kitchen table, notebook open, pen in hand and humming under her breath. he hugs her from behind and sees she's writing something new and they talk a lil, bicker some and tease even more, and then barty tells her she should write a song about him and stop dissing that stupid ex bf of hers bc it's getting old. lily laughs and asks him if he wants a cheesy love song and barty cackles and shakes his head and says that he'd rather have one of her dissing songs, bc they're fun and likes it when she gets all mean. besides, the press wouldn't believe her if she wrote something nice or sweet about him bc barty is always getting into scandal after scandal
lily does end up writing a song about barty, dissing him (affectionately except ppl don't know that) and when she first performs it live, she does so while just wearing one of barty's shirts and barty laughs the whole time while sporting the biggest heart eyes known to mankind
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altschmerzes · 2 months ago
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awhile ago i realized that some of my fav ted lasso fics oat were all written by u and then when i went to see what other works u had, realized that u had written some of my fav fics in a handful of others fandoms i read for too lol
on a whim, i decided to read true north (i had not watched macgyver at this point. (i have since seen the first 2 seasons lol) but i couldn’t sleep and needed to do smth and knew by now i could count on u to deliver on some incredibly written gen fic so i just decided to read it like it was some original fiction that night lol) and omg. when i tell u i went thru every other macgyver fic u’ve written in the weeks after just for more and i have reread true north no less than 3 full times in the past year since
. i regularly return to a lot of ur fics but there’s just smth about that one
 (it’s the slow burn found fam methinks. wriggle up is carving a v similar path in my heart, so.)
anyway, sorry if this got a lil bit long but i felt like u should know how much mental real estate ur stories have in my brain (in the best way possible) and ur recent post about fighting ghosts and demons finally gave me the motivation/bravery to actually send this to u
!!!!! oh wah that is so so kind of you?? thank you so much for taking the time to write out this message, i appreciate it so so much :') it means the world to know someone enjoys my work that much!! it is always an endless delight to know my stories are taking up mental real estate in people's brains XD especially when i am Fighting The Ghosts And Demons
the thought of people reading my works before knowing the source material is such a particular delight, as is the thought of people re-reading them.
also - true north is still one of my msot beloveds, and i hope you know i'm still working on it, even if it's at something of a simmer!! the slow burn found family is everything to me and it's something i love going back to, even if the 'slow' of it tends to be REAL slow and maybe drives everyone including me a bit nuts XD thank you again, so so much, this really made my night
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sokkastyles · 1 year ago
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Hey!, I love your atla meta and zutara posts.
I was scrolling through Instagram and saw this. So if u don't mind, what do you think about this?
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After a break from the atla fandom bcz the discourse lowkey left me exhausted and traumatized. This was'nt pleasant.
Maybe it's bcz this feels like someone read a zutara post and is trying to paint smth similar to it with maiko , but for some reason, this makes me feel kinda sick.
Thoughts?
I think I've responded to this sentiment before because there's a lot to unpack with the idea that Mai "loved Zuko unconditionally," because first of all, she didn't. Their relationship only began because Azula decided it would be more beneficial to bring Zuko back as an ally than as an enemy. If things had gone as expected, Zuko would have been brought back to the fire nation as a prisoner, and he would have been spending the trip home in a cell like Iroh instead of smooching Mai. We have no idea whether Mai might have been distressed by this possibility and the hand she would have played in it, and the show gets her off the hook from having to have feelings about it because things just happen to work out so that she doesn't have to and she gets a boyfriend instead of the knowledge that she helped destroy the life of the boy she had a crush on when they were kids. I actually asked myself once whether she would have cared, and even attempted to write a fic where I started out thinking that Mai would actually try to break Zuko out of prison, but that's not what ended up happening as I channeled Mai's character. Here's the fic by the way.
My point is that their relationship is conditional. It's conditional on Zuko choosing to side with the fire nation. That's why he has to break up with her when he realizes that's not what he wants anymore, and when he tries to explain that to her, she refuses to understand it. And then when she decides to get back together with him, it's conditional, too. She literally tells him never to break up with her again. That's not something you say to a person you love unconditionally, because unconditional love means allowing someone to make their own choices, even if it means letting them go. I'm not even sure you can claim Mai loved Zuko before his banishment, either, since all we see is her blushing once when they were kids. The most you can say is she had a kiddie crush.
I've also seen people say that she loves him unconditionally because she's willing to get back together with him despite not agreeing with his morals, and as I've already said, that isn't true, because she threatens him with ultimatums, and she makes Zuko promise something he can't keep. They broke up because of their differing morals, and since that doesn't change, Zuko is likely to do the same thing again, just like he did at the Boiling Rock when Mai thought he would just back down if she yelled and threw things enough.
But also, the idea that unconditional love in this particular instance is a good thing is something I have to question in the first place. Unconditional love is a lofty phrase, but there are absolutely things that SHOULD be conditional in relationships, and having the same morals and ideals is one of those things. Especially since Zuko is the Fire Lord and his beliefs about politics and ethics will affect the future of his country. This isn't just a difference of opinion, it's something that makes them fundamentally incompatible and it's never resolved. And using it to claim that Mai "loves him unconditionally" because she's willing to stay with him even though they have fundamentally different ideals rubs me the wrong way.
Which leads me back to why I think people make these arguments in the first place, and I agree that it's nauseating. Because often when people say this, they're making some kind of implication that Zuko was so horrible to her and he should be grateful to her that she's willing to stick with him. And not only is that a shitty thing to do to someone in a relationship, but it is not unconditional love. It's gaslighting. It's especially creepy because Zuko has already had enough of that shit in his life. He deserves to be with someone who loves him for who he is, not despite who he is, and that kind of love is not real love to begin with. People are like "oh, but she saved him!" Yeah, she was the reason he was in danger in the first place, though. "Oh, but she put up with his anger and jealousy!" He was angry and jealous because she wouldn't listen when he tried to tell her that he was hurting. "But she isn't his therapist!" Literally shut up. I've said it before and I will say it again, I don't think I've ever seen a fictional relationship be accidentally written like an abusive relationship the way this one is, and it's even worse given that Zuko already has a history of abuse.
And yeah, I agree I think people try to make this argument to counteract Zutara, because Zutara is so much about change. Zuko had to change to have a friendship with Katara, so to counteract people try to make Mai a more appealing partner because she "accepted" him even when he was a mess. But the thing is, as I outlined above, not only is this not true, because Mai isn't particularly accepting. But the other thing is that changing, becoming a better person for someone else, is a good thing. Not being fixed by a relationship, but being willing to become better for the person you love. Katara may not have loved Zuko when he was a villain, but she believed he could change, and that actually is unconditional love, the right kind of unconditional love, the kind of unconditional love that makes people better and doesn't come with obligations. Mai loving Zuko when he's a confused mess isn't all that impressive since his abusive father and sister also "loved" him when he was enough of a mess to be kept under their thumb. This is abuser logic. And it's even more transparent because the second Zuko stands up for himself and takes steps to become a better, happier version of himself, Mai can't stand it and refuses to listen to his reasons, and then continues to act like he'll just shut up and put up if she tells him to.
This sounds harsh but a lot of it isn't directed at Mai necessarily, who is a fictional character who suffers from being underwritten and used by writers with an agenda. But the people who make these arguments that don't seem to realize how much they reek of abuse apologism, about a character whose narrative is so much about overcoming abuse? They can absolutely shut up.
Zuko doesn't owe Mai - or anyone - anything no matter how much she loved him or for how long.
I'd also question whether she made him "happier than we've ever seen him." Half those screenshots don't even show Zuko happy. Another one is when Zuko is commiserating with Mai over "hating the world." The last one is when Zuko is surprised that Mai doesn't hate him. So much for unconditional love.
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xalicitie · 1 year ago
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Whispers — Spencer Reid (smut/fluff)
Scarlett is a young member of the BAU—contemplative, decisive and quietly cunning. Spencer Reid is a young agent as well, with a running mouth clogged with data and facts, and a clumsy charm. Over what starts as a little rumor, and a shameful dream, two agents realize there’s not as much keeping them from each other than it seems.
— This is an excerpt from a short story/fanfic I’ve been putting together for awhile. First of all: I’m alive! Yes, if anyone cares đŸ€©. I’m coming back with yet another fandom to write about, and it’s Criminal Minds. Tell me if u want part 2 of this (smut), or if I should release the first parts. Or maybe whatever else I should write abtđŸ˜»
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As soon as the marble tiles hit Spencer's feet, he knows something is up.
A moment of eye contact doesn't say anything near what it used to. Even just an hour ago, when their gazes would come together, Scarlett's warm eyes would fall curious, maybe lost. But when he's locked eyes with her, fifty feet away, her body sunken in the couch, he realizes something changed. By the way she isn't watching him, digging for answers yet quick to avert her gaze elsewhere, he can just tell. Someone said something.
It kills him. They're standing in the same room, but they're thoughts have roamed to a distance Spencer can't calculate anymore. He has no idea what's been told to her, to what degree she knows, what she thinks of him anymore?
More than anything, Spencer frankly just wants to talk to her again. He's come to the revelation, slowly, that this has come too far. It should've been their own thing, but by the heaviness of the eyes on him, he senses more people know than he'd ever warranted.
When they're waiting for hotel keys, Spencer watches the three women head upstairs to their own rooms. The team's rooms will be adjacent to each other, as they always are. Derek's on the couch, eyes shut with his headphones on, when Spencer decides he'll interrupt his leisure time.
"Derek."
Spencer comes over, shaking him to his wake.
Derek doesn't take it lightly. He jolts awake, even with as light as he was sleeping, and peers at Spencer through slitted eyes.
"What is it?" He asks, grumbling.
Spencer sits besides him, and Derek sees his panic. His hands are gesturing hastily before he can ever get a word out.
"Scarlett knows something. Did you tell someone, Derek?"
Spencer watches, wide-eyed.
He actually wasn't expecting that Derek had told anyone—he took it that maybe Emily had figured out. But, judging by the way Derek goes dead silent, still as a dead fly, he realizes he overestimated Derek's loud mouth.
"..You told Emily?!"
"Reid, I'm sorry, I-" He faces Spencer, flushed red in anger. "I'm sorry, kid."
"You had one thing to do!"
Rather boiling with hysteria and panic than anger, Spencer puts his hands to the sides of his face. He sinks into the seat beside Derek's.
Spencer's plunged in contemplation. He doesn't know exactly what she knows, but there's a chance Scarlett knows that Spencer had a sex dream of her. He, as involuntarily as he did, pictured her, bare and nude. She, his coworker. She, his best friend.
"Spencer, I shouldn't have done it."
Spencer holds his eyes back from rolling into their sockets. Of course he shouldn't have.
"She's probably disgusted."
Spencer sighs. Derek watches him, bummed to see Reid like this. Stressed and almost wretched.
"..Reid, I told you. She likes you for you, she understands."
"No, she thinks I'm a weirdo who pictured her naked—wait."
Spencer stops. Coming to a pensive pause, he faces Derek.
"Did Emily say anything about how she feels?"
Derek's brows come up, and he smirks a little, lips parting. "That's the part I didn't tell you."
Spencer comes up. His limbs animate and his brown eyes burnish, staring at Derek for an answer.
"Emily's convinced Scarlett has the exact same feelings for you."
Derek watches as Spencer comes to an amalgamation of hope and, at the same time, the exact doubt that's been plaguing him the whole day.
"Emily's convinced. But Scarlett didn't say so."
"Reid, you have to find out for yourself."
Pressing his lips, Spencer meets Derek's eyes.
"..Tonight?"
Silence permeates the space with them, and Derek wordlessly nods deliberately.
Despite everything, every instinct upraised and alert in wariness inside Spencer, he knows tonight can only work.
Yet, as soon as Spencer gets his keys, he's darting to his room and closing it shut, through the doorframe without a peek towards Scarlett's door.
He can do it another day, right? He couldn't physically bring himself to her door—there couldn't be a magnet on Earth that could pull him away from his hotel bed.
Spencer feels pathetic. But the idea of the look on her face, her soft features all ruined with disgust and judgement—he doesn't want to fathom it. He doesn't want to think, doesn't want to take any steps now. He's pacing the rug, biting his lips nervously when he quickly grabs his book from his bag. Hitting the mattress and burying his face into the words, a poor yet sufficient antidote for his raucous mind. For now.
Word after word, he forgets. Tonight, he reads slow. Sucking every word in and shielding himself from his embarrassment.
It feels like he can do this all night. He decides he’ll read, and read—move onto the next book if he has to—until he sleeps, without the worry of the decision plaguing him.
But someone has something else in mind.
Spencer had no idea how much time has passed when someone knocks on his door.
The cool, night air is ghosting, and Spencer's staring at his door.
It could be Morgan. He might be standing with a waiting expression before Spencer's door, waiting to drag him towards Scarlett's door.
Or it could be Scarlett herself.
Spencer keeps sitting on his bed dumbly, up until another knock comes.
He's tempted to stay rooted to his bed. He feels like he is. But he feels whoever's outside waiting, and with a volition he doesn't understand, he's standing. Walking over to the door, and after a few moments, he's turning the knob slowly.
Opening the door, Spencer finds his heart pounding when he sees Scarlett in front of him.
Brown hair caressing her shoulders, brown eyes staring up at him. She came over.
"Spencer."
She announces. Greets. Nothing can describe the air between them right now.
Spencer gazes down at her. She hasn't been this close since the coffee incident earlier the morning. It startles him, but having her near reminds him of the ease she used to bring him.
If it were under any other circumstances right now, he might just be able to be comfortable with her again.
He dismisses his thoughts, and decides to actually reply. ..After several moments, that is.
"Scarlett."
He barely utters out.
He can't read her. She looks like she's here for something, but it's taking her awhile to get to the point. Her gaze is wandering and quick—it almost seems she's .. about as nervous as he is?
"-Can I come in?"
Spencer's lips part ever so slightly—the smallest tell that he's relieved.
No repulsed retort, no glower. She wants to come in?
Spencer's mouth hangs open before he realizes how stupid he probably looks, shutting his lips and nodding.
Eyes hesitant, but warm, she smiles at him. Spencer watches wordlessly as her lithe body slips past him, into his hotel room.
He closes his door silently. He's staring at her back. Her hair looks weightless. He hasn't liked having to keep his eyes off of her—every chance that came around, he took to sneak a little glance. She's always been so effortlessly beautiful.
So why is she in his room? If she knows absolutely anything, why is she not hiding from him, at several doors' distance?
"You're reading Stephen King?"
She turns and Spencer gulps in his nerves, licking his lips and shuffling towards her.
"Um, yeah." He offers. "Garcia recommended the book."
Scarlett flips through the pages of The Shining. Her caramel eyes graze over the words lightly.
"It's good?"
Spencer's watching her, and his heart pounds when she meets his gaze.
"Y—Yeah." Spencer kneads a hand through his hair. "It's interesting. I tried reading it slower, to enjoy it more, but .. I only have maybe 40 pages left."
Scarlett nods silently, turning the pages and leaving the room wordless.
Spencer's eyes are furrowed. She comes into his room and takes it upon herself to read his book? While he could watch her fifty million times, eyes sucked in and file through her features that were so pleasant to the eyes—her softly pink lips, her alabaster skin—he can't. Cause he's about to bubble over with curiosity, the curiosity of why she ended up with him despite the odd circumstances.
"Scarlett-"
He gulps when her gaze comes to his. "Um. Don't take this wrong, I just want to know. ..Why are you here?"
Her lips sit in silence. Spencer's fidgety, yet he can't keep his eyes off hers. He's searching the burnished color of her eyes for answers. While she's prone to go silent like this sometimes, there is just so much more tension in her quietness.
She diverts her eyes somewhere near the floor, and comes forward a bit. Spencer can feel himself struggling to keep up with the pace of his breathing.
"I'm here for a reason." She starts. She's not meeting his eyes fully, but there's a shift in her tone that makes her sound candid. She approaches, and Spencer finds the silence alarmingly deafening.
Then she locks their eyes.
"Spencer..did you have a sex dream about me?"
SHIT.
Spencer's immediately red. He opens his mouth for words to come out, but it turns out there's a void between his lips.
He feels like killing Derek. As he stutters and spits and glances around, mumbles coming out jumbled from his tongue, curses are spilling in his mind.
Nothing coherent comes out of his mouth. He doesn't bare to see the look on her face—he's so caught up trying to make a response that somehow suits his needs, he doesn't recognize the apparent calm in her countenance.
"Spencer, look I'm not mad about it."
Then Spencer stops.
All his attention is on Scarlett. It's her turn to halt into silence.
Maybe he's wrapped up in a delusion. But she looks rosy, put in a daze, as he does, too. It's an odd moment—they're both flustered. Staring at each other, Spencer has the feeling they're both, individually, trying to put together whether they want the same thing.
He's not sure at all. But she's come close, and he's praying she rejects him, before the urge to end this burdensome situation by bringing their lips together ends up becoming too much to bear.
"Scarlett, tell me what you want."
Her gaze is suddenly glued on Spencer's.
He's staring at her with an unfeigned curiosity. He leaves room for the possibility that he's got this completely wrong. But what he said is completely candid—he wants exactly what she wants.
If Scarlett wants to rush out the door in disgust, she can and will. If she wants to forget about all of this, sure. If her eyes are telling the truth, and the crave lacing her pupils isn't a daydream, he'll give her everything she needs.
Without a word, Scarlett brings her body to his, nearing his head with a hand and ending it with a kiss.
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drop-dead-dropout · 10 months ago
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NEW USERNAME local-queer-disappointment -> drop-dead-dropout
unpinning my other post because i want to talk a little about me and this space that i've created! hi i'm alex and i dropped out of high school twice lol
i think a dni is stupid because people never listen anyways, which is why i haven't had one, but i still see the value in at least telling people who this little corner is for.
also YELL AT ME ON DISCORD I'M woahits_alex.mp3 IF U ASK ME ABOUT FIC RECS FOR MY FANDOMS I'LL CRY WITH HAPPINESS
anyways opinion stuff under the cut. you don't have to read it, and you don't even have to listen if you do, but i might argue with you (<- serial arguer) so if you want to avoid the Discourse here ya go.
you are welcome here:
- ALL queers. trans men, trans women, nonbinary, intersex, poc queers, xenogender, "contradictory" labels like mspec gays/lesbians lesboys/turigirls/sapphileans (omg it's me!!), slur reclaims, detransitioners (who are not transphobic), mspec lesbians, aro/ace and all variations thereupon, unlabeled, questioning, etc. i love all of you. i love the community that we share. we are family, whether or not some of us want to be, and exclusionism is Not Funky Fresh!!
- pro Palestine!! i don't always rb posts as much as i used to (i am scared of spreading misinformation) but i think i'll start doing that again! (don't forget your daily click guys)
- jewish people. i am specifically adding this one to say that because of the shitty Everything, i've seen a lot of concerning antisemitic stuff recently so i'm just, yk, putting this out there.
- disabilities/systems/cluster b disorders/AAC users. i am not any of these things (except maybe plural??) so if i say/do something out of line please tell me! but i love you guys and you're absolutely welcome here.
- proshippers (if this bothers you block and move on)
- furries. not personally one of y'all but i think you're neat and you make cool art :]
- literally, like, anyone, as long as you're not a dick
you are not welcome here:
- terfs, transphobes, exclusionists, anti-mspec, anti-lesboy, and people who think transandrophobia is "fake" or whatever. go away i don't like you (or at least be prepared to be blocked or yelled at)
- similarly to last, anyone who starts queer infighting or hates on less visible queers/strangers who don't "look" queer, the whole "bi girl's straight bf" nonsense (i don't care if you think someone is cishet. you have no way of knowing that. let's stop hating people for immutable characteristics and start having thoughtful criticisms of people's actions thanks)
- ZIONISTS. BYE BYE
- (but also antisemites because come on now let's notttt. judiasm ≠ zionism)
- ableists, fatphobia, racists/bigots, general dickheads
- antishippers (again, you can either leave now or expect to be argued with)
other general stuff:
- i accept anonymous asks! and also non anonymous ones. ask me shit idk
- i am autistic and VERY gullible. if i reblog a "bait" post, or something that's clearly fake or a joke with a genuine reaction, i'm probably not playing some 5d irony chess i'm probably just stupid. sorry y'all i'm trying :\
- i don't rb nsfw. not as, like, a rule, i just don't see the value in doing so lol. if i ever did i'd tag it and probably update this
UPDATE: thought i should clarify, i don't rb nsfw but i do rb nsfw humor, like dick jokes and stuff. hope there's no confusion
- i argue with people!! i enjoy arguing with people!! usually it's in replies and not reblogs but still. if you are allergic to stuff like that maybe don't follow me? i also rb "discourse" posts, mostly transmasc support stuff and callouts of transandrophobia, general solidarity stuff with the trans community or lgbt community as a whole, proship stuff, politics, current events, that kinda thing.
- this is, shockingly, supposed to be a fandom blog! (i got carried away; i always do.) current fandoms include: ace attorney (the one this blog was supposed to be about), doctor who (childhood hyperfixation come back to bite my ass), and splatoon (no excuse). also mha is basically my abusive boyfriend stockholm syndroming me to stay at this point but i'm trying to get better (not). you can find the records of my failing recovery at @alex-is-losing-sleep-over-krbk /hj (i also sometimes shamelessly rb this blog's posts over there lol)
and i guess since i'm mentioning fandoms, here are my fav ships: wrightworth, klapollo, franmaya, thoschei, pearlina, agent 24, & cuttletavio.
anyways, that's about it. love you all :]
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ashpkat · 9 months ago
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ash dump ideas u never completed or just had on me
idk what fandom. and idc
feel high but also dead rn so j need some brain juice.... please, dickmaster ash the smash.....
oh boy i can do you one worse better. here’s an unfinished first chapter of a cassidy blake fusion au idea i had for magisterium. (u don’t need to know what cassidy blake is to understand but it’s by v.e. schwab)
Call had always been able to see ghosts. Somewhat. He could feel ghosts than he could see on a regular basis, it required a little work to actually see the ghosts. There were some rules. The Veil rule, for instance. How ghosts could only be seen in the Veil. With one exception of course.
Some people think ghosts only come out on Halloween, or during the night. That was not true, not by a long shot. Just because people couldn’t see them doesn’t mean they weren’t there. They could be anywhere, in some poor old lady’s garden, the bread aisle of the supermarket, the front seat of a bus, anywhere. 
Call could feel when a ghost is near. It was something reminiscent of the pitter patter of rain on a window, or maybe someone lightly tapping him on the shoulder. In other more severe cases, sometimes it was like a pulsing headache or someone digging their nails into his brain. 
It happened at random. And this certainly wasn’t the first time he felt it, and it wouldn’t be the last, either. Call was sitting in his desk during Algebra when it began, the tap tap tap. Like always, he tried to ignore it. Key word was tried. It chiseled away at his focus, and there was only one way Call knew that would make it go away. If he went and saw for himself.
Which more often than naught, he doesn’t want to go do. He can tell Aaron doesn’t either, because across the room when Call met his eye, met the intense glare he’s giving him from his seat. Very intense, like terminator laser death intense (Calls never seen the Terminator, so he doesn’t know if they actually shoot lasers but he thinks they probably should because that would be cool). 
Aaron couldn’t feel the tapping, but he knew his best friend well enough to realize when Call does. 
Call shifted in his seat, bouncing his leg absentmindedly. It had gotten stiff and painful from sitting down all day. The teacher just kept droning on. 
“When you get the variable X in this scenario isolated then you’ll have to
” Mr. Graves wheezed out as if he’d been smoking for thirty years. Knowing the amount of stress his students cause him, he probably had.
People around the room were getting antsy with their boredom. No one could even stay still. Rafe wqs sleeping with his eyes open, Kai doodles on their shoes, Kylie and Lacy were giggling and passing notes to each other. 
It was nothing good, Call assumed, because nothing good comes out of popular kids. That’s what Kylie and Lacy were, popular. He could tell because of their bleach blonde hair and perfectly painted nails and how they all looked like carbon copies of eachother. 
They’re usually all had similar personalities too — being general assholes. Kylie has once told Call not to get too close because she thought his bum leg might be contagious. Call fumed for at least 2 weeks after that (and still, 7 years later, he still was).
Maybe he should’ve wanted to be popular, but that was never his style (both literally and figuratively). There were just too many rules, like laugh at jokes but don’t laugh too loud. Smile but not too wide. Wear the right clothes. Play the right sports. Care, but don’t care too much. Etcetera, etcetera.
Call had rules he lived by, like rules with Aaron, but those were different.
 Kylie flicked the note in front of her, over to Lacy’s desk, but she missed and it floated to the floor like a leaf in the wind. From his seat, Call can see Aaron strike a rare, impish grin. 
“I know just what will get your mind off this ghost tap,” said Aaron. Call looked over at him, cocking an eyebrow with mild surprise.
The thing about Aaron was this: he could be popular. He could be the star quarterback. He could be the teenage heartthrob of the school. But he couldn’t.
Because Aaron was dead. He’s a ghost.
Aaron got out of his seat and sauntered over to Lacy’s desk, she’s retrieved the note and is stifling a giggle as she scribbled a reply.
He read aloud over her shoulder, but Call was the only one who can hear him, “Top ten cutest boys in the school,” Aaron feigned surprise, “not to spoil anything but.. number one is Ryan.”
Call rolled his eyes. He could see as Lacy turned around and placed her response on Kylie’s desk, her arm went straight through Aarons torso. Aaron shivered. Then, he turned his body to face Kylie's desk, gingerly putting his fingers on one of the many multi-colored pens that lined it. He focused all his attention on it, scrunching up his semi-transparent tan face. It doesn't move.
In movies, poltergeists could throw TV's and slide beds across the floor. But in reality, it took a lot of ghost energy to cross the Veil -- which is what Call dubbed the little curtain that separated the living and the dead. And the ghosts who do have that energy are typically super old and not very pleasant. Luckily they've never had to deal with one of those. Call was secretly glad that Aarons wasn’t made of all that stuff.
Aaron caught Call staring at his pen escapade and sheepishly smiles, as if he knew he's probably not supposed to be doing that. Then he gracefully clipped himself through the floor and reappeared next to Call. 
He perched himself on Calls desk, effectively hindering what little attention Call was paying. 
“I’d say that didn’t get your mind off it, hm?” Aaron cracked a half smile.
Yeah, actually maybe a little, but now all I can think about are Ryan’s chiseled abs, Call thought to himself, careful not to speak aloud. That was one major perk of having a ghost best friend, he never even had to open your mouth to have a conversation, with the mind link and all. He doesn't quite understand why their minds are linked, however.
“Better than thinking about ghosts right?” Aaron said, but as he does Call could feel the tapping getting stronger. Like an itch at the edge of his vision, pulling and begging for him to look that way. Aaron sighed and shot him a sympathetic look as he hopped down from his desk.
It really only made Call think more about ghosts, and not just the one pestering him, somewhere far in the school, but also Aaron. Call doesn’t know how long it’s been since.. the incident. He tried not to think about it too loud, since Aaron typically gets a little upset when Call mentioned it— how he got stuck actually being a ghost.
He couldn’t have been dead for too long, since there’s not anything retro about him with his floppy blonde hair, Nikes, and Marvel T-shirt. And also because he’s only showed up as of lately, and lately being the last 2 years. It was when Call was 12, and his dad had gotten some weird antique with some weird ghost boy seemingly attached to it. 
“I prefer the term corporally challenged.” Aaron rolled his eyes at Call.
Quit reading my thoughts you freak, Call shot back at him, can’t I get any privacy? 
“It’s not my fault you’re a loud thinker,” he retorted. “Also for the record, I wasn’t attached to the antique! I was following the pull back to you. Things aren’t haunted like that. You know that’s not how it works.”
Thats not what my dad says, Call hid his laugh with a swift cough into his hand. A few people turn and look at him anyway. He sunk lower into his seat and eyes the clock. The tapping was getting worse.  
Calls dad, Alastair, had always been a little obsessed with antiques and the history behind them. Lately, he had been inching towards supernatural territory. Actually no, not just inching, it was a full on sprint into spectral space.
It was like a switch being flipped in his brain, and all Alastair wanted to buy now are creepy old dolls that looked like they would be haunted but weren’t. Call would’ve known if they are. And it wasn’t like Call could ever tell his dad that, because he’d go crazy and try to interrogate him. Alastair had even been talking to some medium that claims he can see ghosts, but Call doubted. He’d met the guy and he couldn’t even see Aaron, so that was enough evidence for a faker for him. 
Maybe he’s going through a midlife crisis, Call thinks to Aaron. He just crinkled his nose at Call and shook his head.
”I don’t think Alastair believes the medium can actually see ghosts,” Aaron said slowly. “Maybe he just likes the company. If you’re catching my drift.”
Call tried hard to not let his face twist up and make it look like he was constipated. No? Whats the drift i’m missing here?
”You know,” he sighed, “that they’re not just chatting about ghosts? They’re getting
 romantical?” At Call’s blank face, he gave up the ghost (ha) and soldiered on. “Is the tapping still there?” Aaron asked, even though Call was pretty sure he already knew the answer.
Sure is, he replied and rubbed the back of his neck. Like a knock, knock, knocking on the base of his skull. It was telling him that there’s some serious paranormal activity going on. Call sighed. He could certainly do without all this spectral nonsense, he couldn’t wait for Summer. Because in Summer, Call could get full nights rests without hearing the tap of the Veil and rather the sounds of Alastair tinkering with cars in the garage. There's something odd about the Hunts house, because Call found that it’s strangely quieter than the rest of the town, especially in Summer. Six weeks of quiet, six weeks of Summer sun and reading comic books with Aaron, six weeks of almost feeling normal with his best friend. All Call has to do was make it through these final days.
Call raised his hand like the dutiful student he was. Mr. Graves saw him and gave him a stern look, already knowing Calls question wouldnt be about math.
“Yes, Callum?” He exhaled, sick of him even though he hadn’t even spoken yet.
”Can I use the bathroom?” Call shuffled in his seat and rolled his shoulders, trying to shake off the feeling, but the tapping was persistent. Out of the corner of his eyes, he could see Aaron sigh and frown. It didn’t take a genius to understand where Call planned to go with this.
”Can’t it wait?” Mr. Graves sighed wearily, “I’m in the middle of very detailed instructions. You’ll miss them.”
Call scowled, ”You know I’ll miss them anyway, even if I was in the room, now c’mon I really gotta go!”
Mr. Graves looked considering, eyeing Call like he was some disease-ridden freak. Then he sighed again and pinched the bridge of his nose with his pointed and his thumb.
"Fine. But make it quick, do not dawdle," he waved him off and turned back to the board.
Call was already out of his seat and snatching the hall pall before Mr. Graves could even think about finishing his sentence. He shuffled out of that stuffy classroom as fast as his leg would allow. In the hallway, Aarons slightly transparent head popped out of a wall, and he didn't look too pleased. Call hardly spared him a glance as he limped down the staircase, his footsteps audible in the nearly silent hallway
"Can we just be normal for once?" Aaron asked, sounding a bit sad. He’d floated down the steps instead of walking, which Call was jealous of. If he was undead, he’d sure love to go without the constant pain in his left leg.
"You're a ghost. And I can see you. That's not normal, so I doubt normal is something we could even achieve." Call hissed at him, the tapping was pulling him somewhere weird.
Call back tracked. It pulled him like a rope attached to his gut right down into a completely seperate hallway.
A locker door swung open and hit Aaron in the face. Call instinctively flinches, but he passed through it like it was nothing. He appeared to be sulky.
"Well you could at least try and be normal," he muttered.
"Whats that supposed to mean?" Call stopped dead in his tracks and glared in the other boys direction. Aaron held his hands up in surrender. He looked apologetic enough for making Call mad, which irked him a little because Aaron was just too nice.
The thing was, they both knew that Call wasn’t a normal boy and Aarons not a normal ghost. There was an accident, snow and ice, cars screeching, and slipping into darkness. And then Call was whole again, flash forward 13 years, and a ghost soon-to-be best friend showed up in Calls house. (a/n: fix/ ??? dunno if i want this to be canon)
Call turned away, skulking off and letting the tapping pull him away. He doesn't even have to think about where he had to go. He ducked into the library, the librarian was somewhere in the backroom, therefore, she couldn't and wouldn't bother Call. Call slunk in between the rows of books. By now, the tapping was more a thudding. This was probably, no, definitely where he needed to be. Aaron appeared in front of him, bottom lip jutted out in a pout.
“I mean this: have you ever tried to ignore the tapping? Just wait it out?” Aaron crossed his arms, “I know, I know..”
“Do you though?” Call exclaimed, but quickly lowered his voice when he realized where he was, “We’ll be quick, in and out.”
Aaron frowned, “But
”
“In and out.” He repeated.
After contemplating silence, the tension in Aarons body eased and he sighed, “fine. Rule number 9 of friendship, friends don’t leave friends in the Veil.”
“Bingo.” Call shot him quick finger guns.
Behind him, Call reached for light airy fabric. It’s wasn’t actual physical fabric, but it was the only tangible way to describe crossing over into the Veil. He pulled it away and let himself fall. Then it was all black and Call felt sharp cold air pierce his lungs, his fingers turning icy, and his whole body becoming overwhelmingly cold.
And then it was again, Calls was back to his normal self. Except, he wasn’t. Not in the veil. He was slightly more translucent than before, and there’s a glowing blue, almost grey, light inside his chest. Beside him is Aaron, looking more solid than not— however he lacked the glowing light inside, telling Call he is indeed still a—
“Ghost?” Aaron sighed, “You’re thinking a lot today? What’s up?”
“Now is not the time for our therapy sessions,” Call snapped back.
(the ghost is jennifer? idk? canon book was that ghost died in a fire but maybe the bookshelves crushed her / someone pushed the shelves?)
(call goes home. uhhh. oh yeah the medium is constantine this is another alastine au. alastair is like surprise we’re going on vacation to salem and call is Fuck)
the only other notes i had for this was
Salem, Massachusetts
(3 locations minimum:
Burying Point Cemetary,
The Witch House,
Protectors Ledge,
House of the seven Gables,
Rockafellas(I HAVE AN ACTUAL FUNNY IDEA),
The Salem Inn,
Wicked Good Books(Tam), Gallows Hill)
- Ghost boy!Aaron
- Ghost Hunter!Call
- Ghost Hunter!Tamara
- Regular boy!Jasper deWinter that gets dragged along w/ Tamara
- Big bad!Maugris, steals Souls in hopes to get a body because he’s a fucking idiot and doesn’t know that’s Not How It Works LMAOOOO
- one sided calron :( but call doesn’t end up with any one in the end
- this is future ash i don’t remember how aaron died but i think he got murdered? idk it was really really weird. in cassidy blake, jacob (the ghost best friend) drowned to death trying to get smthing for his sibling but. eh. aaron has no siblings)
- deadass remember nothing abt this au. btw don’t remember what the funny idea was for rockafellas im so sad i remember losing it at SOMETHINg
Anyway
YO reblog this shit if you want me to share more of my unfinished ideas / chapters
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cursed-rat-of-homosexuality · 1 year ago
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A good is-Tom-Normal-About-That-Media? meter is how I deal with music related to that specific media. Unfortunately in OFMD's case it's ticking in the "Brain Rotted Pile of Clown Meat" zone, because I basically went through every song ever made by Nina Simone just to try and guess which two songs are playing in s2.
So you know what??? I'm laying out my predictions here, if any of these starts playing then I'm owed a Jenkins thumbs up or something like that. Idk. I spent four hours of my life on this, I need a hug. I threw the dice and this is what came out.
> These three are my favorites, I have a feeling about them, they smell like OFMD to me and my brainwaves bounce up a bit when I hear them (u know... like the sea.... ha...ha)
Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood
Ed-Coded, sad, moody, it's frantic and helpless in a way that's also really desperate, and ohohoho the rhythm on this one tickles my brain a bit.
Feeling Good
A bit overplayed, basically in every fandom playlist but It! Is! There! For! A! Reason! And that reason is that it's reeeally good and very villain like. Could be Ed-Coded, I'd like to imagine that's him trying to conform into his Kraken/Blackbeard persona, could be other people too though. Use your imagination here.
Do What You Gotta Do
Are all of these Ed-Coded? You might ask. And the answer is, well.... maybe. It's not my fault Executive Producer David Jenkins based Ed's whole character on Nina Simone songs okay????? (I see what you did there you little evil man-shaped weasel. I SEE IT ALL.) But just.. here, look at me... listen to it and tell me it isn't Ed through and through.
> These ones are also very OFMD-like and I wouldn't be putting them in here after sifting through more than 100 songs just because. I also have a feeling about them, but it isn't the overwhelming sense of certain doom I get from the previous three.
Save Me
Ed coded. He loves Stede and he hates that with every fiber of his being. He's still very hurt, but cannot help being fond of the whimsical dipshit, poor guy.
I Shall Be Released
Ed coded, just give my man a break.
I Put A Spell On You
Overplayed one again, this one isn't really coded to any of them. But I feel like it would play after Stede tries to reconcile with Ed for the first time and fails miserably. Ed is still really hurt, and Stede is just realizing the extent to which he hurt him. It's after they just had a discussion, maybe it's raining, Stede is soaking wet calling "Yd! Yd! Yd please talk to me!" But Ed just keeps on walking. It's a romantic comedy staple and we need to have one of these.
Take Care Of Business
Semi-Competent!Stede being the breadwinner of the family is one of my favourite hcs. Ed is really tired of The Pirate Lifeâ„ąïž and I bet he'd fucking love to be a trophy wife, man spent his whole life being the scourge of the seven seas, give him a break for christs sake.
Mr.Bojangles
just... listen to it
Just Say I Love Him
Is- Is that a... no, it can't be! Dios mio, It's... a Stede coded song đŸ˜±đŸ˜± *pain sounds* *weird bone cracking going on* *little bit of a fleshy sonority to it now* *crashing sounds* *cat meowing* *bone cracking again but this one is good I think*. Ok back to it, this is really just "I should just have told him how I feel" vibes, Stede made a mess, he regrets it. Etc.
That's it then. Did I do this just to prove I was right if any of them appears in S2? Pfft of course not! Who would even do that... lol... Also please feel free to add thinky thoughts to this if y'all are willing! I'd love to hear people's interpretations of the songs.
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