#shooting yourself in the food
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gladyscontrerasart · 8 months ago
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A very lazy, cursory search will give you this as of May 7, 2024.
$400 a trip is literally setting yourself up for failure.
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faaun · 3 months ago
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ive talked to a lot of ppl who have taken vyvanse now and i think ik a bit more on how i need to live on it
#1) dopamine drops on lower dosages or high dosage but in the evenings feel like hell and it wont ever stop you have to just breathe#you will stop breathing well and you wont notice it so you have to remember to breathe deeply. this helps immensely for some reason#2) you will stop processing the existence of food as a consumable thing and not just an object like Table or Cardboard. you will not want to#eat anything. you have to buy meal replacement shakes. sweetness is one of the only pleasant flavours. eat protein. eat as much protein as#you can. down those meal replacament shakes. get enough for a day. try not to into calorie deficits on vyvanse.#3) your mind will be searching for cognitively complex tasks and everything else dwarfs in comparison. dont lay down. do something.#4) you have to exercise. fully exercise at the gym not a home 20 min work out. you need to push your body right now so that you can be ok#5) nothing will be as intense and vivid and beautiful and there will be a layer of seperation between you snd reality even on a lower dosage#this is fine. this is the primary price. sunlight helps and so does doing complex tasks but you cant avoid this. remind yourself that this#is a self-induced thing and its temporary and itll fade.#6) youve been ship of theseus'd into a new person and this effect only increases later into the day. any conclusion you reach about yourself#is most likely not applicable to your non-vyvanse self.#7) carry chapstick around. keep drinking water. dry mouth starts 5 minutes after taking it#8) some of your friends have a reduced range of emotion and this makes them more stable but less capable of experiencing intense joys#and sadnesses. look at them. listen to their perspective. live like them when youre on the medication.#9) music is still gorgeous#10) you will feel very hot very fast. wear layers you can take off.#11) pick up a bow and shoot. keep shooting. keep going. shoot at least 50 arrows if you can. feel the pain in your arms and your shoulders#and then keep shooting.
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thrandilf · 7 months ago
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gonna implore people to just use character names and use enough situational cues/flow things in such a way that they can just use character names and pronouns. I was reading smth that wasn't even smut but was still Unintelligible due to epithets. as in 11 epithets in the first 250 words because I sat back and counted and couldn't keep going.
your writing isn't fancier because you use a lot of epithets. I'm sorry.
if you're a younger writer and want to improve this is genuinely the biggest piece of advice I have outside of grammar conventions
it comes off as clunky and ironically, unclear, because the reader shouldn't sit there juggling who's taller or shorter or exactly who is where in the room or just how Jarring it is for someone I know to be referred to as "the teenager" like PLEASE
names don't stand out at all. neither do pronouns
they're invisible and let the actual important parts of the writing come through
you don't need to be insecure and flood your prose with epithets. it is genuinely okay/ideal to just use names.
if your prose is feeling bland then maybe you need more specific details such as body language, the mood/visuals of the scene, some introspection, ect. I really feel like epithets are a way people try and solve this issue of feeling like your prose is flat by then creating an entirely new issue and not solving the first one
read published books and observe their prose. preferably well written books. a variety of books. you'll likely see little to no use of epithets for named characters but a lot of other ways to refer to characters and build up scenes that immerse your reader rather than break them out of the story
expand the toolkit
and yes, maybe an epithet once in awhile is fine, but like. sparingly.
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greatlightthroughapinhole · 6 months ago
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i love to see people stop demonizing any kind of food and acknowledging that there is actually quite a bit of nutritional value in ice cream and fries and stuff, but there is also a way to do that without acting like none of us have high cholesterol
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martyrbat · 10 months ago
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[ID: two screenshots from a TikTok video. In them, we see a Palestinian's hands as they show a MRE (Meals Ready-to-Eat) package that was air dropped. On it, we can see the instructions include pouring water to activate the flameless ration heater. The second photo shows one of the items is peach applesauce. White text over the photos read: “This is the shit America sent to Palestine. Expired army food. You can hear a man saying "this is not halal". Shame on the USA”. Above that is text in Arabic which reads: “What is in US aid??” END ID]
A reminder that the sodium level is dangerously high—being from 1.6g/meal to 2.3g/meal and you have to eat two to three to consume the proper amount of calories since each contains around 1.2k cals. The recommendation for sodium is less than 2k milligrams (1g) a day. These are used as a quick military meal/training one and because of the high intensity activities and the physical health that a soldier is require to have, the levels aren't as dangerous since they're expelling the excess sodium. And MRE aren't meant to be the only meal, even for the military the DoD policy requires MREs to be replaced or paired with fresh foods when able to because these lack essentials nutrients like fatty-acids and fiber
Sources & additional links (many of these are pages to PDFs, you can use Firefox to open them without downloading):
Original TikTok video
DLA website — Homepage for MRE's, page with several photos of the food after time passed (and with different storage conditions) and where it shows the 'menus'. The one in the video is Menu 12 and the last time it included hot sauce (as shown in linked video) was 2020 (MRE XL) and the first time was in 2016 (MRE XXXVI). As found on the homepage link, the shelf life is 3 years unless it was stored in the cold.
During Hurricane Katrina, a 77 year old man had heart failure after primarily relying on MREs for his every meal because they're not meant for usual civilian aid. He was able to make a recovery after having hospital aid, something Palestinians aren't given due to the blockade to medical supplies — Military Medicine (Oxford Academic)
MREs not being sustainable or healthy, especially for long-term use: Total Prepare, Military Medicine, ScienceDirect
MREs usually require water to work and can lead to faster dehydration and blood pressure due to the sodium levels. However, Gaza has been under a water crisis for years in both quantity and quality because of Israel's blockade, which has only grown more dire since Israel's increased attacks — +972mag (January 16, 2024), NPR (December 29, 2023), UNICEF (June 2022)
Israel denying essential supplies, including food, water filtration systems and purification tablets, medical equipment, anesthesia, etc. and murdering Palestinians when aid does get through— CNN (March 2, 2024), UN Human Rights (March 5, 2024), Al Jazeera on the Flour Massacre (March 5, 2024), Twitter thread of IOF shooting and killing starving Palestinians even before the Flour Massacre (warning for graphic imagery), Eyes on Palestine via Instagram (March 1, 2024)
Defense.gov saying it dropped 'over 36,800 meals' in it's second airdrop. The first was 38,000. Using both numbers (if each MRE was able to be received), a person will need 3 meals required to meet their calorie requirement for one day. If meeting the requirements, it'll feed only 24,933 people for one day out of the over 2.3 million people who are being starved. If you divide it for one meal per person, it'll only feed 74,800 people.
Biden still funding Israel despite the massive aid blockade that's killing thousands — CBS News (March 5, 2024)
Airdrops are incredibly inefficient in delivering aid. They supply less while being more expensive, they're unreliable to be received (especially considering the state of Gaza after being bombed consistently for almost 5 months, landing in the ocean, wind that has blown some in Israeli territory, IOF soldiers still murdering Palestinians if out in the open, health crisis from malnutrition, stampede risks, etc) The fact that they're saying it's being used as 'a last resort' when Isreal is refusing thousands of aid trucks from entering and are using them as bait to murder Palestinians when they do allow entry is beyond insulting. — The Electronic Intifada, NPR, BBC
The effects of starvation: your body eventually starts eating your muscles for protein after the fat reserves are exhausted (which makes receiving the airdrops even more dangerous). Your heart walls grow weaker and the chambers grow larger which makes pumping blood harder, making you more at risk of heart failure. You're fatigued, your immune system is dangerously weak and your organs physically grow smaller as your body eats itself and your organs fail. — NPR, Disease-related Malnutrition: An Evidence-based Approach to Treatment, PCRM, Starvation Response
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So the "food" that the US dropped to Gaza is MREs. Expired. Saw a stitch of this video from a woman saying this is the same thing they did with Hurricane Katrina survivors.
MREs are shelf stable for 7 years. Total. These ones were over 15 years old.
And ofc there were people in the comments being like "ummm well our military eats them just fine, they were expired when I was in the army too" THATS NOT OKAY THO?? NO ONE SHOULD BE FORCED TO EAT EXPIRED FOOD!
Fuck the US, fuck the Israeli government, and fuck you if you think that this is any kind of help to the people of Gaza. They're starving to death and the US is sending expired applesauce while also giving bombs to their murderers.
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i-love-ptv · 4 months ago
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Stacy’s Mom Has Got It Goin’ On ˚̣̣ ᵕ̣̣̣̣̣̣
Pairing: Husband!Rafe Cameron x Soccer-mom!Wife!Reader
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It’s not easy being a soccer-mom, especially when dads hit on you at every game as if you’re not married to Rafe.
Wc: 1,596
Fluff, Protective Rafe making an appearance, kinda pushy guy (idk what to say)
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An: I’ve really wanted to write a fic based on this song, and this idea randomly popped into my head so! Am I using the names I wanna name my kids? Yes, yes I am.
Not proofread tbh
Feedback always appreciated lovelies!! xx
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“I’ll be back, ‘mkay doll?”
You hum in acknowledgement, eyes peering back at the field after looking up.
Your husband, Rafe leant down and places a firm kiss on your forehead.
“Yeahhh, Daddy’s gonna be back, baby.” Rafe coos at your two year old, who was sitting on your lap, babbling freely while peering at him with her big doe eyes.
Rafe walks off the bleachers; in search of the concession stand to buy food for the three of you.
You brush your hand over your young daughter’s head, making sure her somewhat oversized hat is still covering her head entirely. Her hand wraps around your index finger.
It was oddly humid today, if you continued moving, you’d break a slight sweat. You can't even imagine what your daughter -Stacy must be feeling, running around on the large grassy field under the beaming bright sun.
You were proud of your baby girl though, nonetheless. And so was Rafe, of course.
You shout loudly when you notice the game is about to start, bellowing out a “Go Stacy!”
Stacy’s eyes easily found yours, for you and Rafe would always sit in the same spot on the bleachers.
Her eyes were slightly wide due to your shout, despite you and Rafe always cheering for her during her games.
She’s motioning for you to ‘shh’, putting her fingers to her lips before getting into her position.
“Which one’s yours?” You hear to the left of you, the unknown voice makes you tear your eyes away from the field.
You smile shortly at the unfamiliar man next to you, “Number 22.”
You can’t help but notice how he’s rather scruffy looking, an odd contrast to your upkept husband with his neatly buzzed hair.
“Mine’s number 13.” He says, flashing his teeth at you.
You gasp and shoot up a little, making you look down at your daughter on your lap. “Valerie’s yours? Oh she’s just the sweetest!”
The man chuckles, looking deeply in your eyes. This makes your eyebrows raise, slightly in confusion, but mostly in discomfort.
He hadn’t done anything out of the norm, you’d randomly talk to the other moms around too, but something about him made you uncomfortable.
“My name's Brandon, and yours?”
You introduce yourself briefly, before turning back towards the game.
His eyes dart to your left hand, looking for a ring, for any indication that you belong to someone else. He smiles sharply when he finds your fingers bare. This goes unnoticed by you.
Little does he know, you do have your ring on, just around your neck.
Your biggest fear was your youngest accidentally pulling off your ring, resulting in you losing it. Or, even worse: it pokes her eye or something of that nature.
You suppose you could be considered a ‘Helicopter-mom’ at times, simply going to the extremes to make sure your kids are happy and healthy at every point in time.
Rafe is the exact same way, maybe even a little worse. But you knew he was just protective, he loves this life that he has with you, since he had no idea the two of you would’ve been together for so long.
You had started dating Rafe when you were 18 and he was 19. It was good for the first few months, disregarding the few arguments that you had. But then, you had caught Rafe doing cocaine.
You don’t think you’ll ever be able to shake the look on his face from your memory.
You weren’t supposed to be at the party, you said you were busy filling out college applications.
So when he was mid-line, and he saw you standing there all dolled up, watching him with glossy eyes, he felt his heart shatter into pieces.
You weren’t supposed to find out, he wanted to keep this away from you, to keep you close to him.
He promised that he would try and stay sober for you, but eventually he’d give in every time the opportunity was in front of him. This resulted in several arguments, and surprisingly, a break up.
But things are different now. You both are in your 30’s, you got married, and of course, had two beautiful babies together.
Rafe knew he’d be crazy to fuck things up now, when he has the perfect life right in front of him.
Speaking of which; you’re really starting to wonder what the hell is taking him so long just to get some goddamn hotdogs and drinks.
You’re bouncing your knee anxiously, which makes your daughter giggle. You wish she wasn’t finding this amusing, but you know she can’t help it.
“Well who’s this cute girl, huh?” The man coos, tickling your daughter’s side.
“Her name is Noelle.” You huff, your mood quickly shifting due to this stranger touching your daughter.
He lets out another chuckle, you wish you never had to hear it again. “Sounds like you’re quoting Teenage Dirtbag to me.”
You give him a pointed look, you’re really getting sick of his pestering. “That’s where I got it from.”
Abruptly, the crowd starts cheering madly. You look around and see Stacy's team celebrating briefly; they had just scored a goal.
You cheer and clap, grabbing Noelle’s chubby hands and making her raise her arms wildly while giggling with her.
“Y’know, I’ve been thinking. Maybe we could-” Before Brandon could finish his sentence, none other than Rafe Cameron comes stomping up the bleachers, huffing and puffing angrily.
He sits down and sighs, “God, I’m sorry babe. The line was so long! I swear I’m going grey right now.”
“And I missed the goddamn play!” Rafe exclaims. He looks over at you and immediately goes quiet once he sees those wide baby eyes that look at him curiously.
“Da?” Noelle mutters, reaching her tiny hands towards Rafe’s larger ones.
“Yeah. Da’s here babygirl, do you want your food? Huh sweet girl?”
Rafe hands you your food, setting his food aside so he can put Noelle in his lap. He begins to split half his hotdog in pieces for her.
You glance to the left, you notice Brandon looking like a fish out of water.
Rafe is the CEO of one of, if not the biggest business company around. And Brandon had just borderline harassed his wife, who was holding his child.
Brandon sneers at the two of you in silence while the game continues, nearly boiling at the fact that he couldn’t have you.
Your head is laying on Rafe’s shoulders, you’re rubbing circles on Noelle’s shoulder as she settles down.
“Everything alright babe?” Rafe asks, trying to peer down at your face.
You untuck your necklace with your wedding ring from your shirt, fiddling with it. “Yeah, now that you’re here Ray.”
There’s silence between the two of you for a few seconds.
“…What does that mean?”
You hesitate to answer, but you do regardless, “Nothing! It’s just uh..That guy next to me, was kinda like hassling me I guess.”
This makes Rafe straighten his back.
“He do somethin’ to you doll?” Rafe questions in a whisper. You know you have about 30 seconds to try and calm him down before he’s banned from every soccer game left in the season.
“No, okay? I’m fine, it’s cool. I need you to calm down Ray.”
Rafe’s nose is flaring, “What about Ellie? Did he touch her?”
You feel your throat closing up, your heart is damn near pounding out of your chest.
You don’t say anything to Rafe, but that look in your eyes tells him everything he needs to know.
You grab his bicep, trying to keep him grounded. Even though he’s changed, some parts of him haven’t.
Rafe speaks lowly in your ear, but not too much to frighten you in any way. “I’ll take care of it, okay? Don’t worry y’pretty little head about it.”
Rafe presses a firm kiss against your cheek, then presses a softer one to your lips.
After 30 more minutes, and 2 more goals, Stacy’s team wins.
You and Rafe cheer loudly, letting out “That’s our baby girl!”
You meet Stacy at the bottom of the bleachers, holding Noelle in your hand as the littlest claps her hands between Stacy’s face.
You’re too busy congratulating your daughter to notice Rafe pulling Brandon aside while his daughter, Valerie is off talking to her friends.
Rafe puts a firm hand on his shoulder, “Hey man.”
Brandon lets out a nervous laugh, “Hey there, Rafe Cameron, right?”
“Yeah, let’s keep this short. I better not see or hear you talking to my wife again, do you hear me? I don’t give a shit what happened.”
Rafe continues shortly, “And keep your fucking hands to yourself, if I find out you touched my either of my daughters again, I swear to God himself I’ll put you under.”
The two men are holding eye contact, one looks with confidence and borderline rage, while the other looks with fear.
Rafe walks down the bleachers, meeting you and your girls.
“You were amazing out there sweetheart!” Rafe smiles while pulling Stacy into a bear hug.
“Jesus dad, you’re crushing me!” Stacy laughs with a slight wheeze.
Rafe ruffles her hair and puts his arm around your neck.
“All good to go?”
You nod your head, and with that, the four of you begin to walk to Rafe’s parked car.
Rafe realizes that this isn’t the first time you’ve been hit on at a soccer game, or anywhere in fact. And this definitely won’t be the last.
Cause everybody’s in love with Stacy’s mom.
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sugoroo · 3 months ago
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TRADING CARDS!
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ʚɞ summary: toji’s in need of some cash, and you’re in need of having your cherry popped! he’ll take your v card if you lend him your credit card. simple, right?
warnings: fem!reader, penetration (p in v), breast play, tummy bulge, squirting, loss of virginity (reader), fingering, oral (f receiving), age gap (reader just finished college), tojis a bit of a perv, 18+ minors dni.
wc: 7.2k
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"hey, doll?" toji grunts as he pokes his head into your room, his hands shoved deep in his pockets as he shoots you a slightly apologetic grin. "i'm gonna need ya to cover my half of the rent again this month."
you look up from your phone, your lips pulling down into a small frown at his words. this isn't the first time this has happened, and it certainly won't be the last, either. "seriously, toji?"
toji simply gives you a noncommittal shrug in response, turning the pockets of his sweatpants inside out as if to further prove his point — there wasn't a single cent in sight. "i ain't got nothin', sweets. hardly been able to buy food these last few days."
you roll your eyes, letting out a soft huff at his not-so-subtle attempt to make you feel bad for him (which almost always worked, and he knew it.) "fine. but you better come through next month. i can't keep covering you."
he lets out a sigh of relief, reaching out to ruffle your hair with one his large hands. "yeah yeah, i'll pay up next time. promise." he was lying through his teeth, and you both knew it. but you chose not to comment on it — maybe a small part of you wanted to keep toji as your roommate, even if you had to pay his rent half the time.
toji heads back out into the living room to lazily slump across the couch, leaving you to your own thoughts.
it was really starting to grate on your nerves how much you had to support him. he's a fully grown man, and you're a young girl fresh out of college. and yet, somehow, you ended up being the one paying his bills with the leftover money from your summer job.
and maybe it wouldn't bother you so much, if you weren't so constantly pent up.
college was supposed to be your time to shine, where you'd attend countless parties and have meaningless hookups with guys in bathrooms, just like all the movies you watched when you were younger.
but it wasn't really like that. and as much as you loathe to admit it, you're still a virgin. with only your own feeble fingers to keep you company, you can probably count on one hand the amount of orgasms you've had in your life.
and that's when you have an idea.
it's just like trading cards — toji takes your v card, and in return, you lend him your credit card.
it's shameless, and you might've felt embarrassed with yourself for even coming up with it if you weren't in dire need of releasing some tension.
and if toji's as desperate for money as he makes out like he is, maybe he wouldn't mind agreeing to your little proposition.
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the only catch in your genius idea is that you actually have to ask toji about it.
you've been lingering outside his bedroom door for what feels like hours, trying to figure out how to actually phrase your proposal without making a complete fool of yourself.
but just as you timidly raise a fist to knock, the door swings open, and toji walks right into you, causing you to collide face first with his toned chest. you barely register the two strong hands that rest over your shoulders to steady you, your mind suddenly laser focused on the way your cheek is squished between his pecs.
"oops. sorry, doll," toji chuckles heartily, moving one of his hands from your shoulder to gently grasp your hair and pull your now noticeably flushed face away from his chest. "didn't see ya there."
"n-no, it's my fault." you manage to stammer out, taking a few deep breaths in an attempt to regain your composure. shit, you hadn't even asked him yet, and you were already a mess.
he raises a thick eyebrow at your skittish demeanour, his hand leaving your hair to teasingly poke at one of your adorably pink cheeks. "aww, what's this? you blushin'?"
you try and shoot him a glare, but it looks more like a pout than anything else as you meekly swat his hand away from your face. "shut up, toji. you're the one who walked right into me."
he lets out a deep, amused chortle at this, crossing his arms over his chest and staring down at you with a lazy smirk. "right. and you're the one who was lingering outside my door like a creeper."
you let out an embarrassed huff at his rebuttal, knowing there's no way to deny it now. you take another deep breath, idly wringing your hands as you crane your neck to look up at him. "yeah. about that. i, um, i wanted to ask you something."
toji cocks his head to the side, his expression turning mildly curious. "oh? what could you possibly want to ask this old man, hm?" he grunts, your little nervous fidgets not going unnoticed by him.
"w-well, i, um..." you begin, your features twisting up into a grimace as you struggle to get the words out. damn it, you were already cursing your past self for thinking this was a good idea. "i have a proposition for you."
this seems to pique the dark-haired man's interest, and he straightens his back slightly, reaching up with a large hand to scratch his chin. "what kind of proposition are we talkin', sweets?"
you swallow thickly at the way he puts such emphasis on the word proposition, as if he already knows exactly what you're thinking. but of course he doesn't — how could he?
"the kind of proposition where i lend you my credit card to help with your little... money problem," you begin, fighting to keep your voice as steady as possible. "and in return, you..."
toji's eyebrows raise even higher at your words, and he lets out a grunt of irritation when you trail off at the end of your sentence. "in return i what? use your words, doll."
"and in return, you..." you repeat quietly, your voice becoming consistently quieter until the last few words come out as a mere whisper. "help me lose my virginity."
the silence that follows your words is absolutely deafening, the only noise being the faint sounds of cars passing by the road outside the apartment.
you immediately start thinking of ways to salvage the situation, maybe just laugh it off and say it was a prank or something. it's a flimsy excuse, but it's better than this painful silence.
just as you open your mouth in an attempt to backtrack, toji grasps your chin in one large hand, effectively shutting you up with the movement. "you're a damn virgin?" he rasps out, turning your flushed face from side to side as if examining it would help him find the answer.
"u-uh, yeah," you mutter sheepishly, shrinking in on yourself slightly under the sudden intensity of his gaze. "why do you sound so surprised?"
toji barks out an almost incredulous laugh, as if you were utterly ridiculous for even asking such a thing. "seriously?" he huffs, shaking his head. "you're a fine little thing. figured ya would've had guys linin' up around the block for ya at college."
your eyes widen almost comically at his words, your mouth opening and closing a few times as you try to form a coherent response. you never expected your considerably older, rough around the edges roommate to actually find you attractive. "i-is that a yes, then?"
he scoffs loudly at this, repeating your words back to you in a mocking tone. "how the hell do ya expect me to say no to that?" he mutters, the pad of his thumb skimming across your jaw. "i've done worse deals for a whole lot less."
you let out a long sigh of relief, some of the tension leaving your shoulders at his agreement. the hardest part was out the way — you'd managed to get him on board.
"hey." toji grunts, his hand on your chin squeezing hard enough to get your attention as he angles it higher, tearing you from your thoughts. "look at me when we're talkin', girl."
your eyes widen even further at his sudden commanding tone, your thighs instinctively pressing together slightly beneath your skirt. the reaction doesn't go unnoticed by toji, but he doesn't comment on it, simply filing the information away for later.
"ya sure this is what y'want, sweets?" toji asks, his voice barely above a low mutter as he leans his head down closer to your level, his hot breaths just barely puffing across your face as he seemingly searches for any signs of hesitance. "once it's done there ain't no goin' back."
"i... i know." you gulp, vaguely aware of the way his dark eyes follow the gentle bobbing of your throat. "i wouldn't have asked if i didn't want this."
he hums, appearing satisfied with your answer. his thumb moves from your jaw to the plump skin of your lower lip, pulling it down slightly before letting it snap back into place. "how long do i get ya credit card for?"
"how long?" you repeat, blinking a few times. you hadn't even thought about that. and it was becoming quite hard to focus with the way he was toying with your lip. "um... twenty four hours."
toji grunts in acknowledgement, but his lips start to spread into a mischievous grin, and you can tell he's not going to make this easy for you. "nah. forty eight."
you let out an indignant huff, your eyes narrowing at the audacity of this man. two whole days? he was probably planning on bankrupting you at this rate. "thirty six." you counter.
he lets out a hearty laugh, his chest visibly rumbling with amusement at your haggling. his thumb traces over your lip again, causing you to let out a shuddering breath. "mm. ya got y'erself a deal there, dollface."
"good." you mutter, reaching out a hand towards him in a gesture of sealing the deal. toji takes it, his large hand entirely enveloping yours as he gives it a brisk shake.
before you can even think of saying anything else, toji uses his grip on your hand to tug you closer to his chest, your face almost colliding with his torso again.
"i'm assumin' you've atleast kissed before?" toji muses, this thumb still tracing the contour of your lips as if that would answer his question.
you let out a small, embarrassed laugh, rubbing the back of your neck as you find yourself avoiding his gaze again. "yeah, i have."
toji tuts, yanking your chin back up again, more forcibly this time. "jesus, girl. what did i say about keeping your eyes on me?" he grumbles. "and whatcha laughin' for? i say somethin' funny?"
"sorry." you huff, your lips pushing out into an involuntary pout. "i'm not laughing because of you. it was just a really... bad kiss."
he hums in response, tilting his head to the side as his grin morphs into a small smirk. "damn. a virgin and you've never even had a good kiss. i got my work cut out for me here."
you try and shoot him another glare, a huff of exasperation leaving your lips. "no need to rub it in, toji. i'm paying you for this, remember?"
toji barks out an amused chuckle, shaking his head at your little attempts to try and look stern. cute. "yeah yeah, i know ya are. and don't worry, ya won't regret it."
you're about to open your mouth to retort, but before a single syllable can leave your mouth, toji's lips are on yours. they're rough and slightly chapped as they brush over your own, just the texture you would've expected them to be if you had to guess.
it's not a rough kiss, but it's not exactly gentle either. it's somewhere in the middle, somewhere that makes you think even the way toji kisses is just so... toji.
he pulls away after a few moments, letting out a soft huff of laughter at your dazed expression. "you still in there, sweets?" he hums, flicking his thumb against your forehead.
you can feel the way your cheeks flush darker at his taunting words, silently cursing yourself for getting so worked up over a simple kiss. damn it, it was so obvious just how touch starved you were. how were you going to make it through this?
"i'm still here." you grumble under your breath, causing toji to chuckle even harder. "and if you're just gonna keep laughing at me, maybe i'll go ask someone else to help me."
toji's chuckle turns into a bark of laughter, and his lips curve up into a smug grin as he flicks your forehead again. "no can do. we already shook on it. handshake's sacred, dollface. dontcha know?"
"ugh. you just made that—" you attempt to argue, but he shuts you up by pressing his lips back onto yours again, slightly rougher this time. you let out a sound of surprise against his mouth when his scar brushes against your skin, but slowly, you start to reciprocate the gesture.
he lets out a satisfied hum, starting to take a few steps backwards through the doorway of his room, his lips still moving against yours all the way.
you angle your face up to unknowingly chase after his lips when he pulls away, and you have to swallow down the embarrassing sound that threatens to escape you when you realize what you're doing.
toji snorts, shutting the door behind the two of you with a stupidly self-satisfied smirk stretching across his lips. "that attached to me already, huh? we only just started."
"i'm not attached." you scoff meekly, though your actions severely contradict your words as you lean up on your tiptoes in the search of another kiss.
"mhm. whatever y'say, girl." he mutters amusedly, his hand snaking under your chin again to help you reach his mouth. he meets you halfway, his kisses growing slowly more insistent as his tongue flickers out to swipe over your lower lip.
a soft gasp escapes your lips at the feeling of the warm, wet muscle asking for entrance into your mouth, but you comply, parting your lips to allow the intrusion.
he lets out a satisfied grunt, his tongue darting every which way as it expertly explores the warm cavern of your mouth. you just stand there, completely stock still, for a long few seconds before your own tongue starts to meekly lick against his.
"yeah, there we go," toji mutters into your mouth, his thick tongue easily enveloping yours as he rolls them together. he's so effortless with it, like this is second nature for him — you suppose it probably is. you're not oblivious to the amount of hookups he brings back to the apartment when he thinks you're asleep.
toji pulls back from your mouth with a lewd pop! once he registers that you need some air, observing the way your chest rapidly rises and falls like you can't get enough oxygen with silent amusement.
he's going to have such fun pulling more of these pretty reactions from you.
while you're still desperately trying to catch your breath, he slides both of his rough, calloused palms under the fabric of your shirt, his hands leaving a tingling trail of heat across your skin.
"wait—" you begin to protest, but whatever you were going to say trails off once you feel his fingers brush against the underside of your breasts.
he lets out a grunt of surprise, raising his bushy eyebrows. "no bra, doll?" toji scoffs, shaking his head. "you were ready for this, weren't ya?
your cheeks flood with embarrassment for the nth time this evening, and you feel the sudden urge to just shove his hands away and go back to your room to get yourself off with your feeble fingers. but you don't.
toji lets out yet another snort of laughter at your reaction, rolling his eyes. "i ain't sayin' it's a bad thing, girl," he mumbles, moving his hands to cup each of your breasts in his wide palms. "makes things easier for me. i like it."
you let out a small huff of relief at his sort-of-creepy reassurance, unable to fight the way your body instinctively leans into his touch, pressing your chest into his hands slightly.
he hums, removing his hands only to push your shirt up to get a look at your bare breasts, the fabric bunching up around your collarbone as he leans in closer to inspect your assets.
"toji!" you gasp in complaint, trying to push down the instinct to cover yourself up from your roommate's intense gaze. but when your hands fly up to guard your chest, he instantly grabs your wrists, making you freeze.
"ah ah," he chides with a smug smirk, easily moving both of your wrists into one hand while the other reaches out to fondle your breasts. "no need to be shy. ya got a nice pair of juicy tits right here."
his compliment is so lewd, and even with the way you attempt to wriggle your wrists free from his grip, he effortlessly keeps them trapped with one strong hand.
toji squeezes and kneads the supple flesh of your breasts, laving both with equal attention as he feels up every inch of skin available to him. he can't believe his little roommate has been hiding these pretty tits from him all this time.
when he leans down to pop one into his mouth, you let out a strangled gasp which quickly morphs into an almost pornographic moan when he starts to gently suckle at your highly sensitive nipple.
"shit." you manage to push out, your breaths becoming increasingly more erratic as he starts to flick his rough tongue over your perked bud. you can feel rather than hear the raspy chuckle he lets out at your reaction.
"so damn sensitive," toji rumbles as he pulls back from your breast, which is now shiny and slick with his salvia, before moving to the other. "y'like that, huh?"
it takes you a few moments to form a coherent response, your mind suddenly feeling unable to focus on anything other than the way he's practically making out with your chest. "y-yeah."
toji's smirk widens in a grin at your stammered words, clearly finding enjoyment in the way your body is reacting to his every touch. "bet ya do. poor thing, graduated college and still never been properly touched."
you let out an indignant huff, annoyance momentarily taking over your pleasure. damn it, why did he always have to mock you at any given opportunity? you're starting to wish you never told him about your virginity.
he snorts again at your huff, removing his mouth from your breast with a long, stringy trail of salvia connecting his lips to your chest. "whatcha huffin' for, girl? thought ya wanted this."
you shoot him another one of your trying-to-be-stern-but-really-just-pouting glares. "i do want this. but i also want you to stop laughing at me the entire time."
he rolls his eyes dramatically, acting as if not laughing at your expense was the most difficult thing he'd been asked to do today. "i'm not laughin' at you, dollface. i'm laughin' at those stupid ass college boys who missed out on having you like this."
before you can even begin to process his words, toji crowds you backwards until the backs of your knees hit the edge of his bed, and you instinctively plop down onto the mattress, looking up at him with wide eyes.
he snickers at your shocked expression, moving forward to stand between your legs. from this position, he towers over you even more than usual, and you have to crane your neck practically all the way back to meet his eyes.
"why so surprised, hmm?" toji drawls, reaching out to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear in an uncharacteristically gentle touch. "y'think i didn't notice how pretty ya were the first damn day ya moved in?"
you open and close your mouth a few times before managing to pull yourself together enough to speak. "honestly? i kinda figured you didn't pay me much attention — considering how many hookups you bring around here."
he hums in response, moving his hand to grasp your chin and force you to maintain eye contact with him. "so you noticed that, huh?" he grunts, shrugging his shoulders slightly. "they're just distractions, really. i've wanted you for a while, but i assumed ya wouldn't be interested in and old man like me."
you can only raise an eyebrow incredulously at his words, as if he'd just said something ridiculous. "toji, you're so dramatic. you're not that old."
he barks out a loud laugh at this, slowly lowering himself to his knees between your legs. the audible sound of his muscles protesting the movement seems to disprove your words, making you wince. "no need to flatter me, sweets. i know 'm old." he mutters, his smirk still firmly in place.
you open your mouth to argue, but quickly forget whatever you were about to say when toji's large palms start to trail up your thighs, stopping just below the edge of your skirt.
"ya got no panties on too?" he asks teasingly, although you can hear the faint sense of actual curiosity in his tone. however, when his fingers graze against the edge of your lace panties, he huffs. "hmph. you disappoint me."
you roll your eyes at his words. you would've gone pantyless too, but unfortunately the prospect of finally losing your virginity made you so wet that you had to wear them to prevent yourself from dripping on the floor of the apartment.
"you've touched yourself before, i take it?" toji grunts as his hand moves to easily cup your clothed pussy in his palm, his smirk becoming a grin again when he feels how damp the material is.
you suck in a sharp breath, your eyes fluttering in pleasure at the feel of someone else's hand except your own touching your most sensitive area. "y-yeah, i have. but it's..."
toji seems to understand why you trailed off, letting out a hum of acknowledgement as his fingers start to rub little circles against your panties. "but your little fingers can't make you cum right, yeah?"
you can only manage a feeble nod, fighting the urge to start grinding yourself into his hand. he chuckles amusedly at your reaction, his fingers just dipping under the edge of your panties but not quite.
if you were one of his usual hookups, he'd probably be balls deep inside you by now. but you're not — you're his pretty little roommate he's had his eye on for a while, and on top of that, you're a virgin.
he's going to take his sweet time with you.
toji spends what feels like an eternity teasing you through your underwear until you're squirming restless on the edge of his bed before he finally, finally makes direct contact with your pussy.
"shit," he grunts as he swipes his finger through your sopping folds, the digit practically slipping across your slick skin. "you're so damn wet, baby. i've hardly even touched you yet."
you can't stop the pathetic whine that escapes your throat, your cheeks flushed a delightful shade of pink and your eyes half-lidded with need as you look down at him. "please, toji."
fucking hell. he actually has to restrain himself from just pouncing on you right there and then when you beg him so sweetly. instead, he lets out a raspy chuckle, his finger moving down to lazily circle your dripping entrance. "please what, girl? use your words."
"please..." you say again, your voice breathless as you wriggle your hips slightly underneath his hand. "touch me properly."
toji snorts at your phrasing, shaking his head. but before another retort can leave his lips, he's rendered speechless for a moment when he slides a finger into your entrance, your gummy walls instantly sucking him in.
"jesus," he mutters hoarsely, yanking your panties to the side with his other hand to get an unobstructed view of the way your little pussy flutters around his finger. "what a pretty fuckin' cunt."
you let out what can only be described as a mewl at his words, and the noise sounds foreign to your own ears. god, what is he doing to you?
he groans low in his throat at the sound you make, moving his finger around inside of you as gently as he can and brushing the thick digit against your spongy walls.
it should be illegal, really, how quickly toji manages to find your sweet spot. he's had a single finger inside your pussy for just under a minute, and the calloused pad of his digit is already grazing your sensitive g spot.
"ah!" you practically sob, your thighs instinctively clenching around his beefy arm. you've never felt such an intense spark of pleasure before — it's obvious you never managed to find that spot before when you attempted to get yourself off.
he grins smugly, brushing his finger over the spot again, almost touching it but not quite enough to properly stimulate you. "that's the spot, ain't it, dollface?" the question is rhetorical. you both know that's the spot.
but before you can start grinding yourself down onto his finger, he abruptly pulls it out, admiring the way the digit is now coated in your shiny slick.
you open your mouth to protest, or beg for more, or something, but all rational thoughts leave your mind when you see toji slip his finger into his mouth, sucking your juices from it with a low grunt.
"damn, that's good," he mutters gruffly, almost to himself, as he slides it out of his mouth with a lewd pop! — his eyes then fall back on your glistening pussy, his pupils dilated considerably more than before.
in a matter of moments, toji's slid your ruined panties down your legs, admiring the sticky mess soiled there before shamelessly shoving them in his pocket of his sweatpants.
"hey!—" you huff half-heartedly, but before you can even think of finishing the sentence, toji's chapped lips are placing a trail of hot, open-mouthed kisses up your thighs.
"mmph," you moan softly, not bothering to protest as he slides your thighs further apart with his palms, his lips nibbling against the supple skin of your inner thighs, undoubtably leaving small marks that will bloom tomorrow.
"wanna eat you," toji murmurs once he's face to face with your pussy, his hot breaths puffing across your sensitive skin and visibly making your little clit twitch impatiently. "can i eat you, dollface?"
you crease your eyebrows a little in confusion at his request. from what you'd heard from your college friends, guys hated performing oral for girls. but the way toji was staring hungrily at your cunt, his tongue swiping across his dry lips, made you think he would simply laugh at you again if you told him that.
"o-okay," you mutter sheepishly. and the second the agreement leaves your lips, toji's burying his entire face against your heat, groaning into your pussy as he rubs his sharp nose up and down your sopping folds.
when he first slides his rough tongue across your sensitive skin, you swear you go cross-eyed for a full moment before regaining control of yourself. it's like nothing you've ever felt before, wet and warm and so deliciously lewd.
"fuckin' sweeter than candy," toji grunts against your skin, the vibrations causing your body to instinctively attempt to wriggle away. but he's not having it, his beefy arms wrapping around your thighs to keep you in place. "ah ah, no runnin', baby."
while before you might've tried to argue a little in protest, your brain has already turned to mush from just his finger and his tongue, so you can only let out a few unintelligible murmurs.
"yeahhh," he snorts as he continues to sloppily lap at your folds, gathering as much of your syrupy slick on his tastebuds as possible. "don't hear none of that backtalk now."
god, he's so messy with it. you can hardly manage to keep your eyes open to gaze at him, but when you do, it only makes your pleasure heighten to new levels.
you've never seen your roommate so focused on anything before — not even those storage wars shows he likes to shout at on the tv. his eyes are half-lidded, his thick fingers are digging into your thighs so hard you can visibly see the marks forming, and his tongue is ruthless as it delves in and out of your dripping hole.
"t-toji, shit. feels so good," you manage to stammer out, your head thrown back and your hands traveling up to tangle in his messy dark hair without thinking, tugging on it gently.
your action draws a raspy chuckle from low in toji's throat, and his sloppy, shameless tongue seems to speed up even more in response. you vaguely register a glob of saliva landing on your pussy, but just as quick as it falls there, he's already licking it back up. "c'mon, girl, i know you can pull harder than that."
you attempt to tug his dishevelled strands harder, but your hands feel weak, and your thighs are starting to shake slightly around his head. you notice a familiar spring coiling in the depths of your stomach, but it feels more intense than any build-up to an orgasm you've given yourself before.
"t-think i'm close." you gasp out, your mouth hanging open as you try and keep your body from collapsing back against the mattress. he's quick to help, his hands sliding up the back of your skirt to support your back.
toji hums in satisfaction, a shit-eating (or, in this case, a pussy-eating) grin spreading across his lips as he continues to devour you, his tongue repeatedly massaging your g spot.
it feels like he's trying to eat you whole, and it's completely overwhelming in the best way possible.
"yeah?" he mutters against your cunt, wrapping his lips around your puffy, swollen clit and sucking the sensitive bud harshly. "go on then, baby. cum for me."
it feels like a part of you was instinctively waiting for his permission, because the second those words leave his mouth, your entire body starts convulsing in his strong arms, a strangled cry leaving your open mouth as you orgasm.
your earlier suspicion was right, because this is the hardest you've ever cum before in your entire life. (not that there's really much competition). your limbs feel all tingly and airy, and there aren't really many thoughts left in your mind except from toji, toji, toji.
"hmmph," toji grumbles, pulling back from your cunt after he's sure every bit of your sweet release is down his throat. he looks up at you, snickering gruffly at the utterly dumb look across your features.
you look completely fucked out already, and he hasn't even fucked you yet. that's what happens when you make a deal with a virgin, he assumes.
while you attempt to come down from your high, toji shifts slightly, his knees aching slightly from spending so long on the floor. but even worse than that, is the raging erection he has straining against the material of his sweatpants.
it's been there since he started kissing you, and it's only gotten progressively worse as the time stretched on. he's so hard now that it actually hurts, and the small stain of pre-cum darkening the front makes him feel like a damn teenager again.
toji gets to his feet, ignoring the way his stiff muscles protest, and sheds his sweats and his boxers in one swift movement, kicking them somewhere across the room. he makes his way between your legs, spreading them even further apart to make room for his body.
"wait..." you mumble dazedly, your words adorably slurred as you blink lazily up at him, reaching out a hand as if silently asking for something. "don't y'want me to return the favour first?"
he snorts, although it makes something inside him warm the slightest bit at your consideration. "nah, dollface. you're paying me, not the other way 'round, yeah?"
your pouty expression from earlier returns, but before you can argue further, your eyes fall on his cock, which you only just notice is free from his sweatpants. it's bigger than any you've seen videos of online before, with a prominent vein running down the length and pearly rivulets of pre-cum leaking from the pudgy tip.
your mouth falls into a small 'o' shape, a sudden sense of dread filling you at the mere thought of trying to take that inside of you. why did you have to make this deal with someone who has such an unnecessarily large dick?
toji chuckles deeply at your reaction, cocking his head to the side with a smug smirk. "what? don't tell me you're g'nna chicken out on me now, sweets?"
you could just smooth down your skirt, hand him your credit card as payment for what he's done for you already, and walk right out of his room the way you came in.
but you don't. you've come too far already to back out now — you're this close to finally losing your virginity.
"no," you murmur meekly, swallowing thickly and tearing your eyes away from his cock and meeting his eyes again. "i don't wanna stop. it's just... is that thing really gonna fit in me?"
he barks out an amused laugh at this, his rough palms on your thighs squeezing in what's probably his way of giving you a reassuring gesture. "it'll fit, baby. i loosened you up a little already, so that'll help."
"okay," you mutter, your eyes flickering back down as he wraps a large hand around the meaty base of his cock, lining it up with your entrance and rubbing it along your puffy folds, gathering some of your creamy slick on the head. "is it gonna hurt? it's gonna hurt, isn't it?"
toji huffs at your hurried rambling, leaning his head down to shut you up with a quick kiss to your lips. "it'll only hurt at the start," he grunts in as soothing a tone as he can muster, bracing a hand against the headboard above you.
this seems to ease your nerves, if only a little, and you nod in a sign of silent permission. but he doesn't appear satisfied with this, and he grasps your chin with his free hand. "that ain't good enough, dollface. use your words f'me."
"y-you can start now." you murmur in response, your eyes glued to the way the muscles in his arm flex above you as he begins to slowly push himself in.
"fuckin' shit," he groans, the sound more guttural than anything he's let out so far as his cock breaches the first ring of muscle inside of you, his beefy arm visibly shaking as he tries to hold himself back from just plunging all the way in. "so damn tight in here."
your face contorts into a grimace as a rush of pain pangs through your body, your hands clutching at the sheets for purchase. you'd heard about it hurting online, but then again, most people didn't take a cock as big as toji's for their first time.
"sorry, babydoll." he mutters hoarsely, his gruff tone holding an underlying tone of genuine sympathy instead of the amusement he's shown so far — he's clearly aware of the strain he's having on your body.
he gives you a few moments to adjust to the intrusion, gritting his teeth to hold back any sounds that threaten to spill out of his mouth when he feels your cunt clenching and unclenching around him.
"you can keep going now," you manage to say, your eyes screwed shut and your hands fisted in the bedcovers as you try to deal with the pain. "i'm okay."
he grunts in response, the hand that was around your chin moving to grasp one of your balled up hands as he continues to sink himself inside inch by inch. he can feel how hard you squeeze his hand the entire time, probably cutting off the circulation to his arm in the process.
but he couldn't care less about that. not when he so close to finally being balls deep inside of his pretty little roommate.
"biiiig stretch." toji hums, a low, drawn out sound, when he finally feels himself bottom out, your spongy walls contracting and fluttering around him as if they can't decide whether to push the intrusion out or pull it in deeper. "there we go."
you, on the other hand, couldn't manage to string together a single syllable. it feels like toji has buried himself into your guts, like he's physically rearranging your anatomy right before your eyes.
toji lets his own eyes flutter shut for a moment, his adam's apple bobbing as he swallows thickly. he knows you need a while to adjust to taking all of him, but damn if he doesn't want to pound you into the mattress right now.
you let out a strangled groan, wriggling around against the covers as your body stretches to accommodate his sheer size. it feels like he could split you in half without much effort. "p-please... start moving, toji."
"you sure?" he rasps gruffly, his hand gripping the headboard so hard his knuckles have gone completely white. "once i start i prolly won't be able to stop."
"i-i don't care. just..." you begin, unable to even finish the thought when he shifts slightly, unintentionally pushing into you even deeper. "move."
he snorts at your desperation, but the sound turns into something akin to a growl when he pulls out slightly, before shoving himself right back in all the way.
"ah!" you sob pathetically, clinging onto his hand even tighter as he starts to shallowly thrust into you. shit, you're pretty sure you just felt something inside of you snap.
you're officially no longer a virgin.
"yeahhh." toji grunts above you, his lips spreading into a pussydrunk grin as he moves he moves his hips leisurely but expertly. you're starting to understand why his hookups always cry his name so loud through the thin walls separating your rooms.
the initial pain slowly starts to fade, being replaced by an overwhelming sense of pleasure and fullness. you bring your shaky legs up to wrap around his beefy back, your ankles locking against his skin.
"jesus, girl," he groans, his hips subtly stuttering in their pace in response to your actions. "y'er pullin' me in even deeper."
you open your mouth to apologize, or retort, or something, but it comes out as a slurred garble when you feel toji's fat cockhead brush against your cervix.
"uh huhh." he grins smugly, his hand that was interlaced with yours moving down to grip your hip and keep you in place as he quickens his pace slightly. he's being a little gentler than he usually would be just for you, but this is still toji here.
"t-too much!" you cry out, reaching up to grasp onto his bicep above you for some sort of support. your entire body is jolting against the covers in response to his increasingly hard thrusts, your mouth hanging open dumbly.
"nah, dollface," he grunts in protest, his fingers digging into the skin of your hip as if to ground you. "i know y'can take it. doing so damn well f'me."
toji brings his palm up from your hip to slide under your previously bunched up shirt, fondling your breasts and rolling one of your hardened nipples between his fingers.
this makes a loud mewl escape from your throat, your cunt clenching around him in response to the dual sensations. if you thought his tongue made you reach new heights of pleasure, his cock is a completely different beast.
you can already feel something strange stirring in the depths of your stomach. it's not like your previous orgasm, it's unfamiliar — it almost feels like you're about to pee.
"t-toji, feels weird," you slur out, squirming against the covers as you try to hold the rising sensation at bay. "like i'm gonna pee or something. m-maybe y'should pull out."
he barks out a laugh at this, as if he knows something you don't. his hand moves down to pat your stomach, right where the prominent bulge of his cock is moving in and out.
"that means you're gonna squirt, baby." he utters simply, making your eyes widen in surprise. now that's something you've definitely never managed to make yourself do before.
looks like you're gonna be ticking off more than one first from the list today.
"makin' ya squirt for y'er first time," he proclaims cockily, smirking to himself as he effortlessly keeps up the languid rolls of his hips. "i'm damn good, ain't i?"
"i haven't even squirted yet." you grumble, heat flooding to your cheeks in response to his teasing. he's still your annoyingly smug roommate, even when he's fucking you into his mattress.
"key word — yet." toji shrugs in response, his lethal thrusts quickening in pace. his rough palm pushes down right above your bulging tummy, causing you to let out a strangled gasp.
your cunt clenches impossibly tighter around him, your ankles digging into the skin of his back as you feel your second orgasm of the night start to wash over you. "fuck. g-gonna..."
"yeah? c'mon, baby, make a mess all on me." he grunts gruffly, his hand moving down to rub lazy, sloppy circles against your puffy clit, the nub pulsing under his touch.
"tojiiii!" you practically sob, the added stimulation sending you hurling over the edge before you can process it. your vision goes completely white with the intensity of your high, your breaths coming in heavy gasps.
"oh, thattt's it," he hums in satisfaction, lightly patting your pussy as he watches the gushes of clear liquid squirt out, lewdly coating the base of his cock and balls in your essence. "fuckin' good girl."
it only takes him a couple more strokes for toji to know he's close too, and he quickly pulls out, slapping his thick cock against the flushed skin of your tummy and giving it a few final jerks.
as much as he'd love to fill you up, he figures that since you're a virgin, you probably wouldn't be on birth control.
and he's not about take that risk.
toji lets out a low, raspy grunt as he spills his creamy, pearlescent cum all over your stomach, tainting the supple skin with his sticky, oozy mess.
he lazily tugs his boxers and sweatpants back up, wiping some sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand before leaning down and giving your cheek a quick, wet kiss.
then he saunters out of the room, leaving you panting and limp on his bed while he rifles through your purse on the living room table.
"i would've done that for free, by the way." toji mutters amusedly as he pulls out your credit card, waving it tauntingly in front of his face with the smuggest grin yet stretching at his lips. "see ya in thirty six hours, dollface."
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© 2024 SUGOROO. please don't copy or translate any of my works without my explicit permission. all rights are reserved to me.
i’d like to dedicate my first proper fic to @screampied because her works inspired me to begin writing my own! <3
LIKES AND REBLOGS APPRECIATED!
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fruit-kick · 10 months ago
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[image description: below the tweet is an illustration of multiple palestinian children's legs, all varying in height, shoes and outfit. some are bare foot and appear to be baby legs. the caption on the side reads:
"More than 1,000 children in Gaza have had one or both legs amputated because of Israeli attacks. Many of the amputations were performed without anesthesia. Source: (in caps) Unicef (end caps) Dec, 2023."
the next image is just text that reads:
"For years, Israeli soldiers have specifically targeted Palestinian legs.
'I know exactly how many knees I've hit' an IDF sniper told the Israeli newspaper Haaretz in 2020.
The soldier explained,
'there was a story about one sniper who had 11 knees all told, and people thought no one could outdo him. And then I brought in seven or eight knees in one day.'
Another sniper explained 'you see the leg even with the eye, and with a telescopic lens that enlarges to the power of 10, you can actually see the tendons'. /end id]
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k-hotchoisan · 5 months ago
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active recovery
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<yunho x fem!reader>
sore thighs suck after leg day. thank god Yunho is there to offer his help to ease the soreness 🤍
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genre/warnings: pwp, smut, contributing to the big cock!yunho agenda, leg day aftermath (soreness), it starts from an attempted massage and… yeah, size kink, unprotected sex, overstimulation, mating press position, breeding, fingering
a/n: haven’t written Yunho in a hot minute + my attempt of distracting myself from my leg soreness from leg day 😒
wc: 1.8K / apply for taglist here 🤍
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You wake up and you feel like lightning struck your legs, especially your inner thighs. You groan, feeling the soreness shoot up your muscles every time you move.
And to think you didn’t do enough squats the previous day. Your legs tremble slightly too even though you try to minimise any movement to the best of your ability.
Your hand combs through your messy bed in search of your phone. You find it and immediately scroll to your chats, tapping on the first one with Yunho’s name on it. 
[you]: I’m tapping out on gym today. My legs are fuckin toast. 
[yuyu🐶]: sounds like a skill issue. 
[yuyu🐶]: I’m joking please don’t block me. 
[yuyu🐶]: I’m coming over with food and some help ok?
You manage to muster the strength to leave your bed to wash up at least, forcing yourself to get used to the electricity running through your legs. 
The doorbell rings shortly and despite the jerks your legs were giving you on the way there, you manage to reach to the door to invite Yunho in, who has his hands busy with food like he promised. 
He sets up the table and he ensures you’ve eaten well before the both of you go to your bedroom to hear what he’s suggesting. 
“Which part of your leg is sore?” He asks, kneeling before you, giving your legs soft squeezes. You flinch and squeal when his fingers press against your thighs. Guess he’s got his answer. 
“Lie down for me. I’ll stretch you out”, Yunho instructs, and you do. 
Yunho starts with a slow massage, kneading against your sore muscles, ignoring your soft whimpers when his fingers press against a sore spot. It’s kind of working, but you still feel the sensitivity bursting through your nerves, and it makes you involuntarily twitch against Yunho’s touches. 
You groan when Yunho applies pressure on your thighs. He pushes your legs towards you, and he leans in. You try to ignore the suggestive position of Yunho’s crotch just pressing against yours while he’s stretching out your thigh, focusing on hoping to relieve any ounce of soreness at least.
Unfortunately, your soft groans aren’t helping with the situation. Try as Yunho might, ignoring you only seems to have your moans go straight to his dick. 
“Y/n, as much as I adore your voice, I’d appreciate it if you kept it to a minimum. It’s distracting.”
“I can’t help it if I’m this sensitive”, you pout, not realising you ticked something in him. “And also your reactions are cute with your ears all red like that.” 
Yunho narrows his eyes, ignoring your words , and instead focusing on trying to finish your massage. When he’s done with one side, he switches to the other, doing the same action of folding your legs against your chest, his thighs getting dangerously close to your pussy once more. Your thoughts are starting to float to a less pure space.
You know you shouldn’t be doing this. You and Yunho are just simply gym buddies��well, gym buddies who have some sort of funny tension going on recently. And now that he’s just this physically close to you—touching, pressing, stretching you, you can’t seem to get your mind out of the gutter.
It wasn’t until Yunho’s palm spread over your thighs once more, massaging against your thick flesh that you let out another sudden moan at the pressure, that Yunho seems to hit his limit. It’s enough that he’s holding back considering that his hands are getting dangerously close up further your thighs, the way he had himself pressed against you at a rather interesting position, but you, moaning at every touch he’s applying onto you? He can only hold back so much.
“Sorry Yun. It’s just… it feels so good when you do it like that.”
Then, Yunho has you under him, he towers over you on your bed. 
“They say active recovery is good for soreness. Lucky for you, I know a pretty good form of active recovery. Your thighs are gonna be doing a lot more stretching though.”
You swallow hard, wondering if you should take on what he’s trying to allude. Seems like you pressed a little too much of his buttons. Oops. Not that you wanted to complain though.
In the most twisted ways, you always wondered how Yunho would compare—his build wasn’t large, but he’s still big. His hands are big—and he makes carrying dumbbells look like toys. You always wondered where else would be big.
And now, you’re about to find out.
“Now, keep your legs open like this for me”, he instructs. Your bottoms are peeled off you in seconds, and you have your legs spread open. Yunho’s fingers pry your lips open to get his pretty fingers wet enough, then he trails down your wet cunt, circling your clit slowly.  
“You gotta relax for me, baby”, he coaxes you in a tone that’s sending you butterflies in your stomach. “If you can’t take my fingers, my cock is gonna snap in you, y’know?”
That’s all the warning he gives before his slender fingers plunge into your wet heat, and your brain completely melts at the feeling. 
“Good girl”, he comforts. His other hand is gently rubbing and massaging against your thigh once more, ramping up the sensitivity before he trails down to accompany his other hand, fully rubbing circles on your clit. 
Your back is arched from how much Yunho is pressing against your g-spot on top of stimulating your clit. It’s making your toes curl and your mind go blank. 
“Gonna cum Yun,” you mutter through heavy breaths. Yunho is kissing up your neck to your jaw before his lips are on yours, the movements of his fingers encouraging you to release all over them.
“Cum for me, baby. It’ll feel so good, I promise”,  Yunho whispers into your ear, snapping the knot in your stomach. 
He eats up your moans with his kisses, taking advantage of your mouth when your orgasm rakes through your whole body leaves your eyes rolled back and your mouth hanging open. 
Yunho’s cock is soaked and hard underneath his shorts—it’s throbbing and pushing against the fabric of his apparel. So when you’re getting off your high, he has his pants off quickly too. His cock is thick and heavy, covered in precum, looking like the perfect thing to fill you up with.
His wet cock rests on your equally wet cunt, and Yunho strokes himself against your drenched folds, making sure his tip brushes against your clit every time. 
“Yunho, please”, you mutter, your pussy fluttering against nothing, aching for Yunho to just fuck you. 
“Not too sore to take my dick right?” Yunho teases, his gaze darting between your desperate eyes and the way cream from your pussy is decorating his big cock. 
“I’m gonna be stretching you in more ways than one, babe. Be a good girl and take it for me, yeah?”, he smiles. 
For some strange reason, you don’t feel the soreness in your inner thighs, or maybe you’re just so horny that it’s not the soreness that’s your main concern now. 
You bite your lip, then your mind completely coming undone when you feel Yunho push his cockhead into your pussy, stretching your hole open as he accommodates his thick cock in you. 
“Fuck. Look at your tight pussy trying to fit all of me in. I should fill you in for size training after our next sessions. Extra stretching sessions shouldn’t be much of a problem, right baby?” 
Maybe you should take up on that offer. 
The thought of Yunho fitting his fat cock to stretch you open just so your tight pussy can mold to his cock size after your gym sessions sounded way too fucking tempting, especially in your current predicament. You’re imagining the way he would coax your pussy to take more inches of him, and the thought of doing it right after your training sessions—being pumped full of endorphins and just Yunho’s fat cock—your pussy is just dripping and taking more of his cock by the second. Way too fucking enticing.
“Mm. That’s it, baby. Fit me in like this, yeah?” Yunho sighs when his cock finally bottoms out in you, your walls hugging him like a glove. 
You gasp at the fullness. His cockhead is pressing against your g-spot but you feel it in your fucking throat, and any small twitches his cock is making in you is a contender to make you cum any second. 
Your fingers grab onto his tensed biceps to give yourself some leverage, and Yunho is kind enough to wait for you to adjust, or maybe because he feels like he’s about to cum any second from the way your pussy is just squeezing him. 
“Jeong Yunho”, you pant, trying to catch your breath. “You���re so fucking big. Fuck. Oh my fucking god, I feel so full.”
He chuckles, rubbing slow circles from your inner thighs and clit. “All the more we should train for that.”
Yunho and his fat cock are gonna be the death of you. You didn’t even need leg day to do it for you. 
“God, Yunho, just fuck me already.”
“Gladly.” 
Your head is thrown back the moment his cock pulls out of you and thrusts back into you. You’re not gonna survive this, you swear. 
The moans slipping out of you grow louder and more lewd, and Yunho is gradually losing the ability to hold back when he hears his name in your high-pitched symphony paired with the way your pussy is just creaming all over him. He watches the way his cock pushes a bulge whenever he slides into you and it’s taking him everything to not to just rearrange your guts.
The pressure soon wears off, only pleasure flooding through your veins when Yunho fucks the daylights out of you. And now you’re growing greedy. 
So is Yunho. 
“You’re driving me crazy, baby”, Yunho is growing breathless whenever he feels your cunt sucking him in. “Keep doing that and I’ll guarantee you’re not walking straight tomorrow.”
“Sounds like a plan, Yuyu. Then you can come over to take responsibility, right?”
Yunho groans. God he fucking loves it when you’re like this for him. 
So he responds by grabbing you by your thighs and lifting your hips slightly to make sure his cock fills you up all the way. His eyebrows are furrowed in pleasure, mouth slightly open as he listens to your voice climbing up in pitch at every thrust he gives you. 
“So good. Ah fuck. You’re so fucking thick”, you cry through your fucked out delirium. 
Yunho bites his lip, his thrusts growing more desperate and erratic with his cock just twitching for his release. 
He settles your legs down, only to fold them so that your knees are almost pressing against your chest, making sure you fucking see stars while his cock fills you up over and over in that position, hitting your g-spot so fucking easily. You’re choking on your moans at this point, your orgasm just being dangled over your head. 
“Fuck, right there! Gonna cum, Yunho. Oh god, that’s it”, you sob, your orgasm hitting you through shots of dopamine filling up your brain and flooding all over your cunt, pulsing against Yunho’s dick. 
Yunho has his eyes rolled back when you’re squeezing uncontrollably against him, deciding to fuck you through your orgasm, listening to your cries like it’s his favourite sound for the rest of the day. 
“Shit, I don’t think I could ever get enough of this pussy”, he mutters through pants. “So fucking perfect to cum in.”
Yunho squeezes your legs as he stills in you, making sure every drop of his thick cum is filling your pussy to the brim. 
He jerks slightly before pulling out, still holding your legs open for him to watch his cum seep out of your pussy and onto the towel below. You squeal when you feel his long fingers push his cum back into your pussy. Yunho is never telling you, but it’s his silent way of putting his mark on you. 
He soothes your thighs a little more even though he’s still finger fucking his cum back into you while kissing and biting the soft flesh of your thighs. ignoring your cries of overstimulation, before he closes your legs to lie them down. 
“See, this is a form of active recovery too”, Yunho says matter-of-factly, looking up at you with a pretty deceptive smile with his head on your lap. You narrow your eyes, grabbing him by his scalp. 
“I’m gonna blow your phone up tomorrow if I can’t feel my legs, Jeong Yunho.” 
Yunho continues to smile, his fingers easily removing yours from his head. 
“I guess that’s a yes to the extra training sessions then?” 
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slytherinslut0 · 1 year ago
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teasing. | syltherin boy headcanons
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author’s note: based on a request i received. i am feral.
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- your boyfriends reaction to you teasing him under the table at dinner.
Draco Malfoy.
Draco had been in a proper fowl mood all day, and you could tell he was stressed, a clear mixture of a million different things floating through his mind.
You were literally counting down the seconds until you could finally be alone with him, but dinner was fucking dragging.
Sitting next to him, you couldn’t help but to sneak continual glances at him, noting his silver eyes darkened to a deep shade of grey, the tension in his jaw practically palpable as he stared at his plate like he could hex it into another dimension.
Just looking at him made your breath quicken, made your pulse soar.
Of course, part of you empathized with his shitty day, but the other part of you wanted to get on your knees for him right then and there--
because, undeniably so, he’s at his fucking sexiest when he’s pissed.
As Pansy’s chipper voice filled the air, yammering away to a blissfully blazed Zabini, both of them seated across from you and your boyfriend, an idea sparked in your mind.
Without hesitation, you scooted closer to him, subtly enough to not draw any attention to yourself, but enough for Draco to shoot you a side-eyed glance, eyebrow raised.
Feeling his eyes on you, you kept your gaze on your plate as you brushed your hand against his thigh, testing his reaction.
You could practically hear him swallow, could practically feel his body tense, and you’d try not to smirk.
Thrilled, you’d inch your fingers further, tracing small patterns along the middle of his thigh before trailing upwards.
He’d shift on the bench, the veins in his hands tensing as he tightened his grip on his fork.
His reactions would fuel your fire, and you’d keep going, grazing over his crotch, and he’d groan, stifling it with a cough instantly, and that’s when he’d had enough.
Shifting his hand, he’d grasp your thigh, now--with an intensity in his grip so strong you’d almost squeal. A silent warning.
He’d lean in, his voice darker than the midnight sky as he’d whisper, “you’re lucky I have some dignity…but keep it up and I’ll bend you over this fucking table right now, in front of everyone.”
your grin would be unmissable, and you’d only make it another few minutes before he dragged you away from the table and back to his dorm.
Blaise Zabini.
Blaise was literally just eating. And that’s all it took.
That’s all it took for you to want him, to damn-near need him, right then and there.
He’d been flirty with you all morning, making you swoon over his every word with his typical Zabini charm, as though he was still trying to win you over.
You found yourself giggling like a goddamn first year more times than you could even begin to count while he was around, and it drove you crazy, in the best way.
You couldn’t help it, you just always wanted to be near him, kissing him, touching him. He just made you feel that needy. Effortlessly.
And that feeling carried over throughout the entirety of your day, and didn’t falter at dinner. Oh, not even in the slightest.
If anything, it intensified.
Just watching him, in his own little world, focused on his food, casually chiming into the conversation every now and then between bites--it just did something to you. Something you couldn’t explain.
The way the veins in his hands tensed with each movement, the confident aura that surrounded him, regardless of what he was doing, was just fucking intoxicating.
And so, while caught in a moment of both mental and sexual tension, you discreetly placed your hand on his thigh while continuing to eat, feigning innocence as if it were the most natural thing in the world.
Blaise looked over, immediately, and you could practically feel the smirk on his lips.
But then, with his typical Zabini composure, he’d go back to eating, letting you keep your hand there.
As you dared to inch higher, he’d seamlessly continue conversing with his friends, as if entirely unaffected by your advances.
The conversation flowed effortlessly, and to anyone else, it’d seem as though nothing out of the ordinary was transpiring.
At this point, you’d be completely convinced that you were enjoying this more than he was.
But then, as you’d get close to his crotch, dangerously close, he’d lean in, his voice so deep it’d send chills down your spine.
“You better stop.”
You’d grin, slowly moving higher, looking at him with innocent eyes. “Or what?”
“You just wait until I get you alone, babygirl…” he’d smirk, wetting his lips. “I’ll get you back real fucking good.”
Lorenzo Berkshire.
Lorenzo bloody Berkshire; your absolutely sexy, tease of a boyfriend.
Earlier, you had been paired together for an assignment in class, which had turned out to be the most infuriating part of your day.
Enzo was relentless in his teasing; partially because he couldn’t keep his fucking hands off of you, but also because he just loved getting a rise out of you.
All class he’d stared at you with those big brown eyes, biting on his fucking lip as he smirked at you, pressing his crotch against your ass as the two of you gathered supplies for the assignment, acting like he wasn’t doing anything wrong.
By dinner, your head was spinning, your nerves were shot, and you were more than determined to get him back.
And you’d do just that; finding your perfect opportunity while he was casually eating, not really paying you much attention.
You’d shift closer to him, resting your chin on your palm as you fixed your gaze on him, smirking a devilish smirk.
“So, Enz, what do you think of the new charms professor?”
You’d inquire, your voice like honey as it slipped past your lips, your fingers brushing against his leg in unison.
As soon as your hand connected with his thigh, he’d freeze, not daring to look at you, but stalling his movements completely, staring down at his plate as though it’d just grown two legs and spoke to him.
You’d grin, pulling your lip between your teeth in an attempt to hide it, watching him as he’d slowly resume his chewing, his breath coming in shallower bursts as you inched higher, excruciatingly slow.
“I-uh…he’s, he’s good-“ he’d stammer, his voice cracking, clearing his throat to mask it. “Thorough.”
“Oh, thorough, huh?” You’d tease, grin widening. “Why don’t you elaborate on that?”
His jaw would tense, his lids fluttering shut for the briefest moment as you grazed his crotch, adding pressure as to really get back at him, to really give him a taste of his own damn medicine.
He’d be flustered, undoubtedly, but he wouldn’t dare stop you, playing it off until he couldn’t take it anymore.
Then he’d lean in, softly setting his fork down as to not arouse any suspicion.
“My dorm, right now.” He’d practically beg. “I fucking need you.”
Mattheo Riddle.
Teasing Mattheo was not something you did, ever.
Because ‘teasing’, with Mattheo Riddle, was not a concept. It simply did not fucking exist.
You’d attempted it a few times, over your months of dating, and each time you’d found yourself either bent over a table, on your knees for him in a way-too-public location, or edged until you fucking cried/begged for release.
Mattheo never failed to let you know that he’d take you whenever and wherever the fuck he pleased.
‘Don’t poke the dragon’ or ‘let sleeping dogs lie’ ; were very much literal phrases when it came to your boyfriend.
and so you made sure not to tempt him, unless absolutely fucking necessary--However, today, it was more than absolutely fucking necessary.
And why was that, you might ask? Two reasons.
First one being that you’d slept in his dorm last night and woke up late late for class; all thanks to him.
Even though you’d made sure to remind him ten bloody times to set the alarm, he’d somehow still managed to ‘forget’.
And the second one was because he just looked so goddamn fucking sexy, and you were displeased with the fact that you didn’t have time for morning sex.
Regardless, as he was picking at his dinner, looking unbelievably exhausted, you took your chances.
You leaned closer to him discreetly, casually placing your hand on his thigh. He’d instantly tense, legs spreading wider almost involuntarily, grip tightening on his fork.
You’d inch higher, excruciatingly slow, nodding to Blaise as he said something to you, causally entertaining the conversation.
Mattheo’s jaw would tighten, so much it’d genuinely look painful, his head bowing toward the table as you slowly moved upwards.
But then, he’d grow tired of your teasing and grab your wrist, hastily moving it to his dick as he huffed, dropping his fork and running his now-free hand through his hair.
You’d be fuelled on, leaning toward his ear to whisper; “I need you so fucking bad, Matty…”
He’d snuff a groan, his nails digging into your wrist as he continued guiding your hand, guiding you in palming him through his trousers.
“You’re going to regret this, princess…” he’d mutter, his voice torn and laced with promise. “Can’t keep your fucking hands off of me, can you?”
You’d increased your movements, feeling him grow unbelievably hard beneath your fingers, and you’d know he wasn’t bluffing.
“I should bend you over right here, show the boys just what a desperate little slut you are for me….”
You’d smirk, snuffing your giggling, and that would be the last straw. He’d drag you up from the table and fuck you in the nearest closet/empty classroom.
Theodore Nott.
You were fucking bored.
So unbelievably bored that you weren’t sure how much more of it you’d be able to take.
The conversations at the table were about nothing of particular significance, and if you had to endure another second of Enzo’s mindless babbling you were certainly going to be sick.
Theo was seated beside you, aimlessly picking at his food, also looking incredibly bored.
It was not unnoticeable that the two of you were about ready to fall asleep on the damn spot.
In a moment of desperation, you turned to your boyfriend, attempting to spark up a conversation.
“So, what are we planning on doing this weekend?”
As Theo looked up, you’d instantly grow warm, his stormy blue eyes swirling with admiration as he glimpsed your lips, his once flat features beginning to soften.
“Can’t speak for you Bella, but know what I have on the to-do list,” he’d murmur, leaning in for a kiss.
Theo was never one to shy away from PDA.
As your lips met in a quick, soft kiss, you’d smile as he slowly pulled back. “Oh, yeah? And what might that be?”
That’s when you’d put your hand on his thigh, slowly trailing it upwards, instantly causing his eyes to darken, his jaw to tighten.
He’d spread his legs wider, inviting you to keep going, and you’d gladly oblige, palming him eagerly as the two of you held eye-contact intense enough to make you dizzy.
he’d smirk, sucking in shallow breaths as he leaned in for another kiss, muttering against your lips;
“You…you, and you again…”
Someone at the table would playfully groan in disgust and tell you two to get a room, and you’d just laugh before Theo agreed and dragged you back to his dorm.
Tom Riddle.
If you had to listen to one more second of Tom Riddle talking about school related topics, you were going to find the nearest bridge and jump. zero hesitation.
You absolutely loved your boyfriend, loved him to fucking death,
but after he’d spent all afternoon drilling transfiguration concepts into your brain, you honestly just wished he’d drill something else into you, instead.
And by the time dinner rolled around, your brain was mashed potatoes, yet Tom remained completely fucking relentless.
In between bites of food he’d ask you to recite the animagus transformation theory, and when you’d undoubtedly get it wrong, he’d sigh, grabbing the book and reading it back to you.
But no matter how many times he’d repeat it, it didn’t fucking matter, your mind was gone, completely elsewhere.
To be more specific, your mind was lost in a sea of your thoughts, thoughts about Tom’s big strong hands gripping your hips, his strong frame towering over you as he-
Gods, this was complete fucking torture, and you needed it to stop, right now.
Loosening your tie around your neck, you glimpsed him, watching his dark eyes scan the page, watching his long fingers as he pointed at what he was reading to you,
As you undid a few of the buttons on your blouse, your hand fell gracefully, landing on his thigh for support as you leaned over him, looking down at the book,
“Can you repeat that part for me again, Tom?…” you’d murmur, voice a slow drawl, failing to hide your smirk as your felt him tense. “Silly me…I don’t think I heard you correctly…”
Tom would know exactly what you were doing, and at first he’d try to play it off, clearing his throat as he tried to decipher where the fuck he’d left off.
But then, as you continued to inch higher, grazing his crotch, he’d groan, slamming the book shut.
“For Merlin’s sake, you’re a needy little slut, aren’t you?” He’d hiss, the annoyance in his tone mingling with amusement.
“Let’s go before I bend you over the fucking table.”
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kurooh · 6 months ago
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HORNY BRAINROT ! — JUJUTSU KAISEN
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⊹₊˚. bite sized brainrot about your favorite men <3
⟡ feat. aged up! gojo satoru, geto suguru, nanami kento, sukuna ryōmen, itadori yūji, fushiguro megumi, okkotsu yūta, fushiguro toji, kamo choso.
⟡ warnings: 18+ content (mdni), all characters are aged up to 21+, f! reader, weed/shotgunning, half proofread, filthy ass porn and a long post.
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gojo’s adventurous and fun loving, so of course he takes you to a closed for the night pool in another city. once you two get inside the perimeter, you go skinny dipping together, which results in him bending you over the side and fucking you till there’s so much noise you almost get caught by security.
sexting with gojo whenever he’s off attending to matters in another city, sending him nudes or videos of you playing with your pussy in the middle of the day, or when he’s in his hotel at night. wanna see you cum too toru, you whimper in one of the videos of you fingering yourself, pretending your hands are his. once he hears your request, he’s sending you a video of him cumming all over his pelvis while whining your name.
after cooking dinner for you, geto bends you right over the counter and pulls your panties to the side before fucking you, apron on the floor. this way, the food can cool a little while he makes sure you’ll be extra full after dinner.
smoking a joint with geto, who blows smoke into your mouth during or between kisses. once your clothes are off, he’ll stick the joint between your lips and blow a little smoke over your wet pussy. then, he’ll eat you out until you’re crying, make you cum on his tongue again and again.
nanami can’t stop himself from getting hard when he sees you laying on your back, tits plump and in need of his cock between them. he shivers when you spit on his cock, and encourage him to fuck your tits as hard as he can, then shoot his cum into your mouth.
slow, relaxed cuddlefucking on mornings before work with nanami, to get his day started the right way. him nibbling at your neck, mumbling sweet nothings as he holds you close and grips your tits, or holds your leg open.
when you’re in a not so private place and he’s got his hand in your panties, sukuna calls you a slut and degrades you. and yet, he keeps fingering you, reminding you to be quiet lest anyone catch you.
a master of bondage, sukuna knows how to tie you up intricately, then force orgasm after orgasm from your puffy pussy. if you try to squirm away from the stimulation of either a toy, his mouth, his hands, or his cock, he’ll slap your pussy. then, he’ll remind you firmly that you’re not going anywhere until you’re shaking and sobbing.
casual handjobs with yūji on the couch; during one of his favorite movies, you reach over and pull his cock from his shorts, then jerk him off and continue to watch. when he’s about to cum, he’ll quickly guide your mouth to his tip so you can swallow it all.
messy sex with yūji — after giving you a creampie, he goes to eat you out and clean up his cum and your slick. he starts to lick your clit, while gripping your hips hard, keeping you against his face despite your squirming and cries of overstimulation. he’s the happiest man alive when you squirt all over his face!!
wearing a short little sundress while out on a date with megumi, flashing and teasing him all while telling him he can’t touch you just yet. after getting him hard one too many times, he leads you back to the car and fucks you with the sundress on in the backseat.
whenever you two shower together and you’re not too tired, megumi bends you over and fucks you while the water pours over the two of you like rain, dripping from your bodies. sometimes, he’ll use the detachable shower head on you while he’s fucking you.
yūta feels like he can’t breathe when he watches you ride him, entranced by every inch of your body and the way you move up and down on his cock so smoothly. he got a mirror and placed it near the bed, just so he could watch you ride from a different angle. or, he lays back and watches you suck his cock in the mirror.
even though he loves grinding and making out, yūta’s too sensitive and tends to cum in his pants while you’re grinding and kissing him. he always feels a little embarrassed, but forgets about it completely when you lift his cock out of his pants to suck.
being in a free use relationship with toji, who takes advantage of it to the fullest. you’ll be making coffee in the morning, and he hugs you from behind as his hands slide into your panties.
toji believes there’s no other way to fuck your face than besides doing it roughly. so, he’ll yank your hair hard and hold you in place as he plows into your throat with his big cock. he always laughs a little, smirking when you gag trying to take his whole length.
unsurprisingly, toji’s got the biggest fucking size kink. seeing you tear up on top of him as you desperately try to get the full length of his cock inside you has him fighting off the urges to cum right then and there. when he sees your smaller hands grasp his cock again, lowering yourself on his fat tip, he can’t help himself and slams you all the way down onto it.
even though choso’s infertile, he breeds your tight pussy and whines about how he wants to get you pregnant, while breathlessly praising the way you’re taking his cock so well. the second any of his cum starts to leak from your hole, he gathers it on his fingers and pushes it right back inside you.
choso’s too easy to rile up, but you love it — he always ends up throwing you around and having his way with you. he literally gets horny chasing you after you dodge an ass slap… anyway he loves to fuck you without a single care in the world, using all of your holes either mercilessly or desperately.
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lizziesangel · 12 days ago
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RAFE CAMERON - can't get enough
x HIGH MAINTENANCE!FEM!reader - MASTERLIST
SUMMARY: he can’t get enough of your kisses (5 times he wants your kiss and the one time you want his)
WORD COUNT: 877
GENRE: fluff
CONTENT WARNING: kisses, lots of kisses, soft!rafe cameron
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the first time
“rafe, don’t even think about it,” you warned, holding up a hand to stop him in his tracks. you were perched at your vanity, delicately putting the final touches on your lip gloss.
rafe, leaning against the doorframe, tilted his head with a grin. “think about what?” he asked, though his eyes were already on your lips.
you gave him a pointed look. “you know what. i just finished, and if you kiss me, you’ll mess it all up.”
he took a slow step forward, then another, ignoring your protests as he stopped just behind your chair. “you look so pretty,” he murmured, brushing a strand of hair behind your ear.
“rafe.”
“just one,” he said softly, leaning down to press a quick kiss to your lips.
you pulled back, huffing as you turned to inspect the damage in the mirror. “it’s sticky now! you never listen.”
he laughed, wrapping his arms around your shoulders and resting his chin on your head. “you look perfect, even if your lip gloss is a little smudged.”
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the second time
you were deep into your nighttime routine, carefully patting moisturizer onto your face when rafe walked into the bathroom.
“what are you doing?” he asked, leaning against the counter and watching you with a curious look.
“my skincare,” you said simply, dabbing a bit of eye cream under each eye. “you should try it sometime.”
he smirked. “i’ll leave that to you, princess.”
you rolled your eyes, turning back to the mirror. “okay, what do you want? you’re staring.”
“a kiss,” he said immediately, stepping closer.
you turned to him with an exasperated sigh. “rafe, my face is all sticky from product. you’ll hate it.”
“don’t care,” he replied, wrapping an arm around your waist to pull you closer.
before you could stop him, he kissed you, pulling back with a satisfied smile despite the faint scent of your moisturizer lingering on his lips.
“you’re impossible,” you muttered, shaking your head.
“and you’re adorable,” he shot back, pressing another kiss to your forehead for good measure.
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the third time
the sun was setting, and you were chatting with sarah and wheezie near the food table when rafe appeared out of nowhere, a mischievous glint in his eye.
“hey,” he said, sliding an arm around your waist.
you looked up at him, smiling. “hey yourself. having fun?”
“not as much as i could be,” he said, his tone teasing as he leaned down slightly, his eyes flicking to your lips.
you quickly caught on, shaking your head. “not here, rafe! your whole family’s watching.”
he shrugged. “so? they know you’re my girlfriend.”
before you could argue, he leaned in and kissed you softly, pulling away just as quickly.
sarah groaned dramatically. “ugh, get a room, you two.”
you flushed, nudging rafe’s side. “see what you did?”
“worth it,” he said, smirking as he reached for a drink.
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the fourth time
you were pacing the living room, phone pressed to your ear as you talked to one of your friends about an upcoming event.
“no, i think we should go with the gold theme—it’s classier,” you said, pausing to listen to their response.
rafe was sprawled on the couch, watching you with an amused expression. when you passed by him for the third time, he reached out and grabbed your wrist.
“babe, stop,” you whispered, waving him off.
he ignored you, pulling you closer until you were standing right in front of him. “just one kiss,” he whispered back, a playful smile on his face.
you glared at him, but he leaned up and pressed a quick kiss to your lips before you could stop him.
“sorry, i got distracted,” you said into the phone, shooting him a look.
rafe just grinned, leaning back like he hadn’t done anything wrong.
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the fifth time
“careful!” you warned as rafe grabbed your hand, admiring the shiny new polish on your nails. “they’re still wet.”
he raised an eyebrow. “so? i’m not touching them.”
“still, don’t mess with me,” you said, narrowing your eyes at him as he pulled you closer.
he smirked. “mess with you? i’d never.”
before you could argue, he kissed you, holding you close despite your half-hearted attempts to scold him.
“rafe! now i’m all distracted,” you whined, though you couldn’t help the smile creeping onto your face.
“good,” he said, grinning. “you’re cuter when you’re distracted.”
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bonus
it had been a long day, and rafe was lying on the couch, his head resting on a pillow as he flipped through channels. he looked so relaxed, so content, that you couldn’t help but be drawn to him.
without a word, you climbed onto the couch and settled beside him, resting your head on his chest.
“hey,” he said, his voice soft as he looked down at you.
“hey,” you replied, tilting your head up to look at him.
he raised an eyebrow, clearly surprised when you leaned up and kissed him gently.
when you pulled back, he grinned. “what was that for?”
“just felt like it,” you said with a shrug, though your cheeks were warm.
“you’re cute when you’re sweet,” he teased, pulling you closer and pressing a kiss to the top of your head.
“don’t let it go to your head,” you mumbled, but you couldn’t hide the smile on your face.
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kammazi · 7 days ago
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★ after you and katsuki started officially dating it didn’t take long for you to move in with him. the first few weeks took some adjusting to. whether that be the food you ate, you learning to make his always a lot more spicy, what shows you begrudgingly agreed to watch, eventually agreeing on the walking dead, or even the way you would shift around your schedules to match each-others just so you can spend time together in peace.
well, peace is a loose word because katsuki soon learned that you were a big fan of asking him strange questions. especially when you were both snuggled into bed about to go to sleep so that you can begin your next day bright and early.
for example:
you were resting your head on his chest, his arm around your midsection as your legs were tangled beneath the sheets. katsuki breathed a sigh of comfort as he was drifting off into his slumber.
his face held a peaceful expression that contrasted your wide awake form. you glanced at him before shifting your eyes and spoke.
“kat, why do people have armpit hair?”
katsuki opened an eye to look down at you, his eyebrows scrunched and mouth half open as he looked at you in silence.
“what?” you sighed before playing with his chain as you continued. “like why is it there. and why does it stop growing at some point?”
katsuki’s perplexed face relaxed as he closed his eyes and turned his head, seemingly used to it and just wanting to sleep even if at times he liked to entertain your silly questions. “i dunno, google it tomorrow.”
his breathing resumed to deep inhales but you were unsatisfied. even though you truly wanted to sleep, you wanted answers and unfortunately for katsuki you were persistent. the two of you layed there in silence before you spoke again. “okay but what about toenails.”
katsuki let out a silent grunt before answering. “some evolution shit. now seriously, i’m not dragging you outta bed in the mornin’.” you exhaled through your nose and let a few seconds pass.
knowing he was probably a second away from pushing you off your shared bed, you decided to push some more for your own entertainment, after all, it wouldn’t hurt would it?
you breathed in before quickly shooting out another question.“..how are we the only species that have the consciousness to communi-” unfortunately for you, your boyfriend didn’t let you to finish your sentence as he shoved your face into his chest, effectively silencing you as your voice came out muffled.
“you’re on your last straw. i love you but if you ask me one more stupid question i’m throwin’ you out of bed.” his words came out as a mumble, no trace of a threatening undertone to be found.
you grinned to yourself before wrapping your arms around his neck and squeezing lightly.
“you looove mee?” his eyes blinked open as he stared at you with a blank expression. soon enough you could see a trace of a smile that grew as he gripped your waist tighter. you held back a chuckle that turned into a yelp as katsuki flipped out over, loosening your hold on him.
planting a kiss on your lips, he pulled you into him and grunted as his face rested in the crook of your neck. “now that’s a genuine stupid question. if you dunno the answer to that then the hell am i here for right now.” you let out a chuckle to his answer before snuggling back into him, finally feeling sleep creep over you. “i know, i love you too kats.”
he chuckled and allowed his body to relax into you. “good, now stop with the questions and sleep idiot.”
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hoshifighting · 2 months ago
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Two words. Dilf Cheol. (I am on the brink of insanity thank yewww)
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dilf!seungcheol
WARNINGS: smut, fluff, crying, marriage, his kid loves u, shy dilf!seungcheol at the beginning.
oh man, dilf!seungcheol though? i think about it every single day, i swear. and yeah, it all starts with that awkward-ass moment at the café. he’s standing there all buff and shy, trying to work up the nerve to ask for your number, his daughter hanging onto his leg like she’s his bodyguard. her big, curious eyes peeking out at you while he stumbles over his words. “uh… I just… I thought maybe you’d… uh,” seungcheol scratches the back of his neck, all nervous—like he isn’t the size of a tank. “you know, if you’re not busy… you could give me your insta?” he’s waiting for you to laugh at him, probably thinks he’s gonna get rejected because, you know, he’s got a kid and all. like that makes him less attractive or something. but you’re all heart-eyes the second his little girl pipes up with, “daddy thinks you’re pretty.”
dude nearly dies on the spot. he’s so red, you could probably cook an egg on his cheeks. but you just crouch down to her level, giving her the same sweet smile you flashed at the waitress earlier, and say, “well, I think your dad’s really handsome, too.”
game over. you’ve got him hooked, right there.
from then on, you’re texting nonstop. it’s almost like a high school crush thing, except the guy’s a full-grown dad who still somehow makes your stomach flip like you’re sixteen again. his insta’s basically a whole love letter to his daughter, like, every other post is her: her in some princess costume, her making pancakes (or trying to), her at the park with him, her with his dog. sometimes, you’ll scroll through his feed just to see him smile because, damn, it’s so rare he smiles like that anywhere else.
but then there’s the gym photos. god, those gym photos. all sweaty and pumped up, and you swear he’s showing off just a bit for you now that he knows you’re watching. his arms look like they could crush you, but the way he talks? it’s like he’s this big ol’ teddy bear wrapped in all that muscle.
“you eat today?” he texts you at like, 2 p.m., no greeting or anything.
you text back, “noo :(( too busy.”
not even a minute later, you get a notification from some food delivery app—he’s already sent something to your place. he’s like that. doesn’t even ask, just takes care of it. if it’s cold out, he’s dropping off a coat. if it rains, a brand new umbrella’s somehow at your work's door.
one night, you're scrolling through insta, and there’s this photo of him at some fancy work event, all dressed up in a suit and tie. goddamn, you think, biting your lip, because who knew seungcheol could clean up like that? the suit hugs every muscle, and it’s wild how he can look that good in anything from sweats to formalwear. you double-tap, and not two minutes later, he’s texting you.
“you like that one?”
you don’t even bother playing coy. “nah, I loved that one.”
there’s a pause, and you can almost picture him blushing on the other end, even though you’re the one getting all flustered.
“well, maybe you’ll get to see it in person soon,” he shoots back, and there’s a teasing edge to it, the same one that’s been driving you absolutely crazy since you started talking.
you roll your eyes, but your heart’s doing that dumb fluttery thing again. “maybe,” you reply, playing along.
and it’s like, you’re not even sure how this all happened so fast, but seungcheol? he’s always making sure you’re good, like his whole day revolves around making you smile, checking in, making sure you're eating, keeping warm. it’s low-key intense but in the best way possible.
and somehow, between all the little text convos and the insta stalking, you’ve found yourself seriously catching feelings for this dad with the cutest kid, the sweetest heart, and a whole-ass gym routine that’s absolutely unfair.
and you wonder: how the hell did you get this lucky?
seungcheol's always been like that—taking care of you like it’s second nature, probably because he’s used to being in dad-mode 24/7. you kinda feel spoiled, in the best way possible. he’s always looking out for you. it’s not that he’s overbearing; it’s just that this is how he shows he cares. but you know it goes both ways.
so one day, you decide to return the favor. you find this pink polo, something that screams him but in the softest, most endearing way. you know his daughter will love it too, ‘cause she’s all about pink and matching with her dad. you send it to him without saying much, just a little note saying, “thought this would look good on you.” the next time you see him, he's wearing it, and yeah, the shirt hugs his body perfectly. he’s acting like it’s no big deal, but you catch the way he blushes when you compliment him. “didn’t have to do all that,” he mutters, rubbing the back of his neck, but his eyes are softer than usual, that little glint of he’s falling harder than he planned.
but what really seals the deal is how u handle his daughter. every time you two try to plan a date, something comes up—his mom’s busy, or the babysitter falls through, and suddenly, the whole night’s flipped. instead of a fancy dinner, you’re headed to the park or some kid-friendly café, making sure his little girl has fun. and somehow, you end up having more fun on those “ruined” dates, watching seungcheol let loose, running around with his kid while you cheer them on. it’s like you get him, get his life, and he’s not used to that.
and then, finally, one night, the stars align. his mom takes the kid for the weekend, and it’s just you and him. alone.
and oh god, does he reward you.
he’s been holding back for weeks—months even. all that pent-up frustration, that tension from constantly having to play the responsible dad while trying to not let himself get too attached to you, it all comes crashing down.
he’s rough, no question about it. but it’s the kind of rough that makes your whole body sing. his hands are everywhere, grabbing, holding, pressing you up against walls and furniture like he’s desperate to feel every inch of you at once. he’s strong, and he knows it, lifting you like you weigh nothing, carrying you from one spot to the next without breaking a sweat.
the first time, it’s almost frantic. he’s pounding into you like he’s afraid the moment’s gonna slip through his fingers, grunting into your ear, his breath hot and uneven against your skin. your legs wrap around him, but you can hardly hold on—he’s relentless, hitting that spot over and over until you’re crying out, body shaking violently.
you don’t even realize your legs are spasming until hours later, when you try to stand and nearly collapse from how shaky you are. but seungcheol’s not done. oh no. he’s far from done.
before you can even catch your breath, he’s down between your legs, eating you out like a man famished. this time, it’s slower his tongue doing things that make you arch off the bed, hands fisting in his hair as he drags you to the edge again, then pulls you back just to do it all over. every time you think you’re about to lose it, he eases up, grinning against your skin like he knows exactly what he’s doing.
and yeah, maybe it’s been ages for him, but fuck, the man knows how to destroy you. by the time he’s done, you’re a complete mess, legs trembling, heart flying from your chest, your body so sensitive that even the thought of him touching you again makes you shudder.
seungcheol though, he’s the type to take his time. slow and unshakable, like he’s gotta be absolutely sure before he makes any big moves. but with you? he’s struggling. there’s this itch under his skin, this need to lock it down, put a ring on your finger, make it official. and yeah, he’d never say it out loud, not yet. he’s got too much pride to come off that desperate. but every time he watches you with his daughter, every time she calls you her “best friend” or shows you the drawing she made of you three as a family, he’s fighting the urge to drop down on one knee and ask you to make it real.
he hides it well, though, keeps up the usual routine. he keeps taking you out on dates, some with his little girl tagging along, others just the two of you. and he’s always scolding you whenever you show up with yet another gift for her.
“y/n, you’ve gotta stop,” he groans, shaking his head as you hand his daughter a set of pink hair clips that match her favorite doll. “she’s gonna expect something every week at this point.”
but there’s that soft look in his eyes, the one that betrays how much he loves seeing you spoil his kid. he’ll roll his eyes, but you notice how he always says “my girls” now, so casually like it’s the most natural thing in the world.
you and her. his girls.
one day, he takes you to her father’s day presentation at school. you’re not sure who’s more nervous, seungcheol or his daughter. but when she walks on stage in her tiny tutu, all giggles and shy smiles, it’s seungcheol who completely loses it. you’re sitting beside him, watching him tear up before she’s even started dancing. by the time the performance is over, he’s full-on crying, holding his face in his hands as you rub his back, trying to calm him down.
“it’s just… she’s growing up so fast,” he sniffs, looking up at you with watery eyes, completely unashamed of the tears streaming down his face. and you can’t help but love him more for it, for how much he loves his daughter, for how raw and real he is when it comes to her.
your intimate life? that’s been steady too, despite how busy things get. with a kid around, it’s not always easy to find the time, but seungcheol makes sure you’re never left wanting. there are the quickies, yeah, when his daughter’s asleep and you’ve got the living room to yourselves, stealing a heated make-out session that somehow ends up with your back pressed against the couch cushions, his hands roaming under your clothes while he kisses you senseless.
but if things get too feral, you two will sneak off to the laundry room or the closet, anywhere you can get a little privacy. he’s fast, efficient, but still so thorough, making sure you’re fully satisfied every single time. it’s like, no matter how quick things have to be, he’s always got this laser focus on making you feel good.
but even with all the passion, he’s still got that soft side. sometimes, it’s just enough to make out on the couch, your lips swollen from kissing, the weight of him pressed against you. and in those moments, there’s this quiet comprehension between you two. you don’t need the sex to feel connected—sometimes, just being close is enough.
but it’s getting harder for him to hold back. every time he sees you playing with his daughter, every time she asks if you’re coming over for dinner, he feels it. that pull. that urge to make you his. and one night, after his daughter’s fallen asleep and the two of you are tangled up on the couch, catching your breath after another one of those wild, stolen moments, he looks at you, really looks at you, and the words just fall out of his mouth.
“marry me.”
it’s not planned, not rehearsed. hell, he hadn’t even thought about it until the moment the words slipped out. but once they’re out there, he realizes he’s never been more sure of anything in his life. his hand tightens around yours, and he’s staring at you like you’re the only thing in the world that matters, like he’s already bracing himself for the answer.
and all you can think is, finally.
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astralazuli · 1 year ago
Text
If you get Covid, honestly, the best thing you can do is REST REST REST.
Even if you feel okay, prioritize rest.
Even if you're thinking, "oh I should be able to do this by now," rest instead of pushing yourself.
Even if your doctor says you should be able to do this by now & just need to work through the fatigue/dizziness/tachycardia/whathaveyou, ignore their uninformed opinion & rest.
There is a lot of overlap between long covid & ME/CFS (as mentioned in the article linked above). In fact, many cases of long covid are just ME/CFS with a fancy hat because you know where it came from (unlike very many pre-Covid ME/CFS patients).
& the best thing you can do early in ME/CFS is learn to pace & to rest before you think you need to.
Pacing means learning to live within your energy envelope rather than trying to escape it.
Think Spoon Theory. You've only got so many exertion Spoons each day & with pacing for ME/CFS, you always want to end up with at least one Spoon left at the end of the day. You never want zero or negative Spoons, because that's when PEM hits you like a ton of bricks & all your symptoms flare & you feel like actual death.
Worse yet, this can lead to permanent lowering of your energy baseline. Which, as it turns out, can get pretty dang low if you keep overexerting yourself. I am talking "can't get out of bed" low, "can't listen to music or have a conversation because you're too fatigued" low, "can barely breathe" low.
I don't say this to scare you or to convince you this is where long covid will always end up. But I do want folks who aren't ME/CFS informed to understand the stakes.
It's also important to understand that, most likely, your doctors don't know this. ME/CFS is chronically under researched & generally dismissed as a psychological problem or malingering because it doesn't yet have a definitive biological marker for diagnosis. (Jeeze, wonder if that has anything to do with the absolute dearth of funding for research, hm? Anyway.) This means a lot of doctors don't bother keeping up on what little research is getting done & still have very archaic opinions about it, including the idea that it is best treated by Graded Exercise Therapy (or GET) (basically incrementally increasing activity at a set pace, regardless of energy envelope) & CBT. Yep. A lot of doctors will think the best route is to just send you to psychotherapy to "learn to not be afraid of exertion."
There's a whole other post about why doctors think these things (I've literally written & deleted like three lengthy rants about the PACE Trial in an attempt to write this post & that's just the tip of the medical nonsense iceberg), but they do & we're stuck dealing with it, despite current research showing GET is contraindicated in ME/CFS & the CDC recommending pacing above all else in symptom management.
All this to say, please be gentle with your body when & after you have covid if you do end up getting it, & rest as much as possible & take re-entering life as slowly as you can. (I know that, especially in the US but also in many other countries, it is pretty much impossible to rest as much as you should in such situations due to the capitalistic hellscape we live in.)
& like. Be gentle with your brain as well. Having lowered capacity for exertion sucks, especially if you're used to being go go go. But take this time to reflect on how you're still a being with inherent value, no matter your productivity, just like everyone else, & unpack the ableism in the glorification of the grind, & give yourself grace in dealing with your feelings around these things. It'll be good for you & good for society at large.
(Also, while CBT does jack shit for ME/CFS, if you are struggling with decreased abilities/learning to relax & rest when needed, it might be worth looking into a chronic illness informed therapist. Chronic illness informed therapists are more likely to be helpful in a) not giving you shit medical advice & b) not (inadvertently or not) gaslighting you into thinking it's all psychological. I have tragically had waaaaaay too many psychotherapists in my time as a disabled person do both of those things & it really only hurt me in the immediate & the long run. Pretending you don't have a physical illness doesn't really help you not have that physical illness.)
The United States has always been a terrible place to be sick and disabled. Ableism is baked into our myths of bootstrapping and self-reliance, in which health is virtue and illness is degeneracy. It is long past time for a bedrock shift, for all of us.
Long covid has derailed my life. Make no mistake: It could yours, too.
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pomefioredove · 4 months ago
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need overblot boys with epel, and floyd with a reader that randomly lore drops as if they're an old dad like "yeah lol my old school had a shooting once....anyways *SNOREE*" and when asked they just agree and walk away and never elaborate whatsoever💀 if you feel uncomfortable feel free to delete or ignore‼️love ya pookie💥
*ੈ✩‧₊˚ a reader with a backstory
I got u 🫡🫡
summary: wacky reader lore type of post: headcanons characters: riddle, leona, azul, floyd, jamil, vil, epel, idia, malleus additional info: romantic, reader is gender neutral, reader is yuu
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you find new ways to raise Riddle's blood pressure every day
little guy is worried enough as it is
you've already got your school work, taking care of Ramshackle, taking care of Grim, taking care of all the other freshmen, taking care of-
well... you get it
the last thing he needs is to hear another one of your stories
"oh, yeah, that's like the time I got stabbed"
"????? WHAT??"
what's entertaining to you and ADeuce is mortifying to Riddle
if you're not careful you'll end up sleeping on the floor in his room
where he can keep a close eye on you
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
you're like Leona's little court jester
and he takes you with him everywhere
it's not easy to get a genuine laugh out of him, after all
besides, what's so bad about a little dark humor? it's not like you died or anything
he knows you're a resilient little thing
and you seem to love telling him about "that time you crawled into a drainage pipe", anyway
you make him laugh; he likes you
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
Azul indulges you
his white noise machine stopped working last month and you make for excellent background ambience
so, he lets you talk yourself in circles about your school work, your friends, Grim, Grim again
and then you drop the most HEINOUS bombshells in the middle
"blah blah blah Grim, blah blah Crowley, blah blah, that one time I got lost in the woods for a day, blah blah-"
he loses his train of thought every time
now, Floyd is the complete opposite
he will hyperfocus on the most mundane details
and ignore the bombshells
will give you an, "oh, that's cool" to your ghost story but will find you the pair of socks you mentioned liking three months ago
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
Jamil is just fascinated by you
you as a person, of course
but also the fact that you're still alive
one night, he's explaining the reason he makes all of Kalim's food and you're like
"oh, yeah, I get it. I got mold poisoning once and hallucinated for a week"
?????
then you go right back to asking him about the recipe
sitting on the counter, as happy as could be
"HOW ARE YOU STILL ALIVE!!!"
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
Vil is used to this
he knows that look on your face
he will shush you with a finger to your lips before you even start
"don't tell me, I'm stressed enough as it is"
he's going to break out if you keep at it
he finds you quite... macabre
which is entertaining until he sees you going down a flight of stairs without holding onto the railing and remembers all those stories you'd told him
he's just... concerned for you, that's all
and he does NOT appreciate Epel for encouraging it
"tell us more about the time you fell down that hill into that pile of rocks, Prefect!"
:D
like a kid in a candy store
learning new Lore is like the highlight of his week
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
"talk about having a high luck stat..."
Idia is more entertained than anything
he thought these kinds of things only happened in anime, but...
...there you are
it sounds like you experience more in a single month than he has in his whole life
and you know what?
GOOD
you can keep your freaky real-world experiences!
he'll just live vicariously through you
*ੈ✩‧₊˚
poor Malleus
he's been putting so much effort into learning and blending with human culture, and now here you are with your terrifying stories
you tell him in such earnest, too
you seem so... unbothered by it
perhaps humans are less fragile than he thought?
of course, he shouldn't have underestimated you in the first place :)!
then you come over for dinner one night
"hahah, yeah, last time I was at someone's house their grandma threw a lamp at my head and I got a concussion"
Silver and Sebek both go >_>
Lilia goes <_<
and then Malleus is there like, "ah, another fascinating tale :)"
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