#shmoozy

[destinysbounty]

If you ever want to get whiplash so hard you snap your neck, listen to later Wildbrain-era Jay and his squeaky lil uwu voice, and then immediately jump over to the Pilots and hear him with his shmoozy brooklyn accent.

[jonkleringjerster]

i love it when he flirts w batman… like do u have anything more sinister to say than a shmoozy one liner while u bat ur whore eyes uhh didn’t think so… whore

[drakeven]

The Night Post

I've been listening to a really neat fiction podcast about some of my three favourite things: Letters, Mysterious Goings On, and Shmoozy Queer Romance. Go check it out here!! GILT CITY FOR LYFEEE

Posted using PostyBirb

[mable-stitchpunk]

Going Home in a Box: Chapter 81 (Teaser)

That’s why this night out was so important because he needed to let off some steam. Thankfully, Freddy was more than happy to welcome him.

“Foxy! Hello!” he called through the vent the moment Foxy came into sight.

“Ahoy, Freddy!” Foxy called back. He hurried through the rest of the vent and climbed out. “Ya seem to be in a chipper mood.”

“Of course! I am always in a good mood when my best friend comes on down for a visit.”

There was something so sincere in the way Freddy said that. So utterly corny and shmoozy, but completely sincere.

“Now don’t go gettin’ soft on me,” Foxy said with a warm chuckle.

“What, me? Never! I am made of too much metal to be soft,” Freddy joked back. He beckoned him with a hand. “Come with me to my green room and we can get this night started!” he chirped.

He began to eagerly lead the way down the hall. A little too eager to get going, which Foxy picked up on right away. Though instead of asking directly, he decided to test the waters.

“How’s Gregory?”

“He is doing great! Although he will be staying with Sunny and Jake tonight. Which is good! They are finally starting to get along.”

“Sounds like that whole joint custody thing’s workin’ out.”

Freddy chuckled happily. Foxy found his silence somehow telling.

It occurred to him then that Freddy was up to something, and it likely involved his bandmates since Gregory was out of the picture.

Which meant that the following walk to Freddy’s green room was especially tense. Foxy did his best not to show it- the moment Freddy asked about work he went right into a spiel about the business, about the new pizza, about a kid who managed to almost reach his Sit ‘n Survive high score, and virtually anything else that came to mind. It sounded like his usual friendly bragging but if he could’ve, he would’ve been sweating bullets right now.

He barely gave Freddy room to speak but Freddy wasn’t bothered. He saw Foxy’s chattiness as a sign that he was in a good mood, and thus his own second-thoughts were quickly dashed.

They soon arrived at Rockstar Row. The curtains to Freddy’s green room were drawn as they usually were, but Foxy found himself eyeing them carefully as he followed the bear up to his door. Freddy stopped just out of range so that the door wouldn’t automatically open and turned to look at Foxy.

“Would you like to go in first?” Freddy offered. His eyes nearly glowing with excitement.

That’s when it became a little too hard to ignore.

“Freddy,” Foxy flatly.

“Yes, Foxy?”

“Is yer band sittin’ in there?”

Freddy seemed startled at the question. His eyes darted between the pirate and the door. After a long pause his ears drooped, and he drooped, and he gave a defeated, “Yes.”

“…A’right.”

Foxy made a motion like taking a deep breath and after a long second of considering, he spun on his heel. But instead of bolting off- which was his natural reflex- he instead yanked his hoodie up and over his head and tossed it onto the red velour rope. He checked himself over with hand and hook before turning back to Freddy.

“How do I look?”

Freddy perked up instantly. “Excellent! Very cool!”

“Ya should’a warned me, Freddo. I woulda brought me good coat.”

Freddy’s eyes down casted apologetically. “I know, I was just… afraid that you would not come.”

“Do they at least know I’m comin’?”

“Of course! I wanted to make sure in advance that it would be a completely safe situation. I would never arrange a meeting between you and my bandmates unless I was absolutely certain that nobody would tell on you. They will not, they just want to meet you.”

“Chica included?”

“Chica especially! Now that she knows you and I are not… well… together.”

“We ain’t?! Freddy, I be shocked!” Foxy gasped.

“What?!” Freddy gasped.

“Freddy,” Foxy said flatly.

“Oh! Oh, hmm-hmm, my apologies,” Freddy warmly chuckled. He turned towards the door. “Now then, are you ready to meet the Glamrocks?”

“Ehhhhh.”

“I believe in you! Let us head in!”

[otobabe]

Omg girlie (gender neutral) I was not expecting you to include Kondou!!! If you have others you’re thinking ab def tell us!

ugh kondou is just so good!!!! and that's not just my daddy issues talking!!!

More praise thoughts/headcanons~

(from) Harada: He's infatuated with his partners, that much is certain. Especially in the beginning of a relationship (or fwb situation) he's full of compliments that make you feel like you're in the center of a nsfw fairytale, examples like "oh my god you're adorable" and "you really know how to get me going". Later on, if you express interest in exploring~ and more praise, he'd get really into praises that emphasize size differences or age differences. "I love to see your little hole taking my big cock so well", "My older man/woman/partner is so good at teaching me new things", "What a cute little princess/prince/majesty you are, riding daddy's big dick so well " (yes i am assigning sano both milf fucker and daddy kink, this is my barbie dream house)

(to) Souji: in the right moments you'll send shivers down Souji's spine with a "Souji-kun~ you look so cute like this~", praises with a teasing edge, almost on the brink of sounding degrading, can get him blushing and embarrassed from how hard he gets hearing it come from your mouth. He likes to banter and has more attitude and walls up than most can bear, just make sure if your praising him it's playful and not too serious or accidentally hurtful ;)

from) Amagiri the type to kiss you mid-moan then send you reeling with his low voice telling you "Quiet now, I want to hear how wet you are for me/I want to hear you take in my thrusts". Erotic, deep, sensual, that's the game Amagiri plays, but it comes out naturally. Nothing he says will sound like he read it from some '50 ways to get in their pants' how-to book. He's kinky, but classy, urging you on both with his words and his fingers, and it's a pleasant surprise when you catch him teasing you with a hint of a smile like, "don't give in now, I'm just getting started".

to) Motoyama: To be friends with Iba and to have taught Iba many many things over their lives, Motoyama has got to have some special characteristics, one of those is that he loves to be praised. Iba might praise his partner often, but as far as his bestie goes it doesn't happen often but is very genuine when it does, and that's something Motoyama craves in romantic experiences too! I know I said this about Nomura as well, but it's true for both of them: Motoyama looooves to be called a "pretty boy", he doesn't have that haircut for nothing. He's also a reader and though he's not normally reading romance, he does love praises with a little more substance to them, "You're intoxicating", "i love how obedient you are", "you look so silly squirming like that, but don't worry, I know you can endure this<3", all examples of words that will keep him straining in his pants 💖

more praise headcanons below the cut!

from) Ootori: Ahhhh Ootori Keisuke, my sassy "30-something" plot device lol. He's such a tease, you'd be surprised how much filth can come out of his outwardly-polite mouth. This tea drinking, romance novel reading, aristoCAT is all about shmoozy words in bed. Honestly, he's quoting from stuff he's read before and hoping you won't notice. "You look as beautiful as the morning glory's flower, my love~ Your legs are opening up for me quite nicely~", whenever he opens his mouth it makes you question whether or not you should expect better from him, or whether it's exactly the kind of charming corniness you need in your life (it is). He wants to come home to you trying on some new lingerie and praise "what a thoughtful little slut you are<3", he wants to bring you almost to orgasm over and over again and then tease that he "loves how needy you are".

from) Kimigiku: Ugh the most perfect femdom is here!!! She can give you gentle or kinky, it's all about giving YOU what YOU want. While not exclusively a service top, she does love to give a lot of coaxing like "doing so good, princess/prince/majesty" and "i'll take care of you cutie, i promise, just give me one more, I know you can". Now let's say you've touched her nerves a little this week: stayed out a little late with your coworkers, or gave her attitude a couple times... She's more than willing to tie you up and taunt you, telling you "Oh, I'm sure you can get out of those restraints yourself, right? Such a big strong man/woman/lover that I have". She'll degrade you and make it sound like the most enchanting curse you've ever heard; "I love using you", "No one else could ever match up to you, my biggest whore<3", "You don't need to cum, right? It's enough just to please me, right?"

from) Yamazaki: Hakuouki's own sweet little romantic nerd + killer spy <3 Idk if anyone else was surprised that he's canonically supposed to be 30 but I was when I first saw it lol! He's experienced: with sneaking around, one night stands, keeping things quiet, but when he finds someone special he turns into a blushing mess. His duality also pertains to praise, he likes hearing it and giving it, and he also likes giving and receiving degradation, just not normally at the same time ;). If you want him to he'll definitely put on his spy persona in bed for you! That said, he loves to assure you "Don't worry, you're safe with me, you can let it all out, you sound so beautiful", and loves to make little promises in bed when you're pleasing him like "That's my baby, I'll reward you so well for this. I love to see you full of me".

to) Yamazaki: Like I said, I think he's a duality-pleasing man. Praise him in bed and he's working double time to please you. Very enthusiastic when hearing what you like, if you tell him "I love it when you give me head", he'll make sure to spend extra time pleasing you down there~

to) Miki: Beat up his ego a little bit. Unlike Souji, Miki is a brat who can take what he gives. He's down with being called a slut/whore/etc or being referred to as your sex toy. If you top him it's a secret turn on of his to get embarrassed so saying "I know it hurts but you're taking it so well!" is an insta-nut. He's also into hearing you egg him on when he's being a brat and rub it in when he gives in, "You're such a good listener when I give you what you need, huh?" and "Can't you beg sweeter than that? Or is it beneath you even when you're already on your knees for me?"

from) Miki: Aaaaand he gives as good as he gets~ His mouth is filthy, and he's shameless when it comes to fucking you. Brash and abrasive, he'll tell you that "you look so beautiful with my cock in your mouth" with a haughty smirk on his face and he knows his confidence is a turn on in this case. He's not pussyfooting around what he means, with "you can beg better than that, little slut" often proceeding a later groan of "your screams sound so good baby". If you've been flirting or sexting before meeting up, he loves to throw in a "I've been waiting all day to put my cock in you" as soon as he walks through the door.

[necros-writing-stuff]

Personally I love Whitney and Sydney the most. Of course I know that Whitney would never love the Player in a healthy way, they are incredibly flawed due to many things (one of them being in this hell-hole of a town). And I don't think that the Player should think of Whitney in a "I can fix them, they will love me and I don't hold anything against them"-kind of way. But I do enjoy having PC pursue Whitney romantically and seeing Whitney develop this tiny soft spot for them because it isn't really portrayed in a shmoozy "I wuv u" kind of way. You can see that Whitney also has their feelings and that they care to some degree for PC. It makes them feel a bit more human and not just like a flat character:)

I also like the recent development of us being able to have Whitney come to our home and interact with Bailey. It's interesting that Whitney actively wants to buy PC and starts doing work for Bailey. What exactly they do for Bailey isn't known and I really wanna know what would happen if they do manage to "afford" to buy PC. And the dialogue also hints to Whitney not coming from a rich background since they actually tell Bailey that they are broke and don't have money.

All of the new scenes with Kylar and Whitney for me were really just new Bailey lore scenes. We learned that he has a gun, and that he doesn't like working with the church but does under certain circumstances. Very interesting shit.

As for Whitney, I agree. A soft spot for PC that doesn't get turned into Whitney being soft and devoted to PC or "improve" them as a person is the way to go. Still incredibly unhealthy, but in a neat way where we see peaks of Whitney underneath what they project.

Sydney however sets off my fight or flight. Which, to be fair, wad intended according to the two main writers of Syd. So job well done to them. For Sydney I think I'd like to see more lore around Harper explored more so than the church.

[wutheringmights]

I read a crap ton of Webtoons but I mostly stick to romance ones because i love me a good shmoozy romance

That being said I started this horror thriller one exclusively because the cover art captivated me in ways I cannot fully explain

[not-timdrake]

Sir, there are three batarang thingies lodged into my now broken window. I don't care about your vigilante shmoozies or your big bad guys in sleep wear. Where do I file for reparations my insurance won't cover it because apparently "that's Gotham" like theyre not having us pay extra for bat coverage. Also I think my tab water is radio active and I might have some slight mutations from it, does that fall under the no meta rule? Because I feel like that would discriminate against the poor.

thats my bad gang.

i think i know which house, ill leave my bat-card so you can fix your house :/

one time thing tho, you live in gotham you know whats gonna happen ☹️

[shannonsketches]

How old do you think Ganondorf was when he started to adopt the whole theatrics bit? Whether that be as a political stance or bc he's just dramatic, how young did it start? Personally I'm picturing a 13 year old monologuing at every chance

I'm so glad you asked, I have another ted talk about Ganondorf and Performing, I've been thinking about this so much today!! BRACE FOR A TEXT BLOCK:

So for my Ganondorf, the way that I write him, as I may have mentioned, I headcanon he was raised in heavy isolation by Twinrova until he was about 13-14 so that she could have overt control over his influences and upbringing, and was very stoic and serious as a child, as he is mostly being conditioned as a political diplomat and ambassador for a post-war Gerudo Valley to Hyrule (and a threat, if need be, of course).

Now my story for him is self-indulgently full of NabsGan, and I credit their meeting and bonding and her more rambunctious, rebellious attitude for forcing him to loosen up a bit as he got older.

That said, he still, while in the valley, maintains a stoic dignified air, as Gerudo Kings are seen as gods or god-adjacent in Gerudo culture. And aside from Nabooru, Twinrova, his select few combat trainers, the Hylian King, and his daughter, no one knows Ganondorf as a human person, they know him as divinity, so these airs and the sense of security it brings to his people are necessary. He's not flashy with them, he's not dramatic with them, he's their guardian, and their leader, and that's how he presents himself. Until the Hylian Queen marries.

Because while he has been a liaison to Hyrule for most of his youth, and the King and Princess know him very well by now, and they've done well to ease tensions between their people -- The new king is the one in power, and Ganondorf is a 7'6" hyper-competent arguably celestial once-in-a-century Gerudo Male, and the single largest threat to Hyrule there is.

So the performance starts small. The queen is still alive, she can smooth the wrinkles and make way for Ganondorf to build a peaceful non-threatening relationship with her new husband. And Ganondorf is smart, he knows he needs to be a little more shmoozy than he's had to be before, a little more charismatic and amenable. He needs to prove he's a friend to Hyrule, so that Hyrule can be a friend to Gerudo Valley. Liking the King is not his job. Keeping his people alive is his job. And even though he knows the queen would not allow for another war to break out, Ganondorf slowly builds a character to play around her husband, just as a soft introduction.

Then the queen dies, and his safety net is Gone. And Ganondorf does not like the leadership in other countries -- He thinks the Zora King is a joke, he hates Darunia and his bravado nonsense, the Kokiri are creepy and the Deku Tree doesn't do anything but feed them ... or feed off of them, he's never really been sure -- so his best bet of survival is being besties with the King. He needs that trust, he needs that reliance, and Ganondorf knew the Queen so well, what a stable and safe shoulder he is for a mourning king to turn to. Except that Ganondorf hates this man, and thinks he's an idiot, so the character has to take a deep root, and he performs like he's competing for an Oscar. Unfortunately, Ganondorf is so good at what he does, and the King does build a reliance on him. So he is called to Hyrule much more often than he ever was before. All the while, back home, his people are getting what they need from Hyrule, but only as an after thought, and even the great kingdom of Hyrule can't change the weather, and Hyrule is still socially hostile to the Gerudo who venture into its territory despite Ganondorf's 20+ years of diplomacy, and so the frustration takes a deep root, too, and Ganondorf is running out of patience for both of these circumstances.

So he comes up with a plan that will solve all his problems, and since he's hardly around his people anymore, he's really become devoted to this character he's playing. He likes it now. He's unlocked something mischievous and fun in himself, and he's being a bit of a child about it, since he wasn't able to be much of a child before. Nabooru was right, the whole rambunctious rebellion route is a lot of fun, and as the plan falls into place, one beautiful little brick at a time, Ganondorf becomes a very large and confident cat simply batting around his food, and it starts to show a little more every day, over the steady course of ten years.

The young princess picks up on this as she grows old enough to observe it, Impa knew him before and has been cautiously noting the shift, but their King, of course, is flattered by what he assumes to be the development of trust and candid comfort from his large, loyal confidant, which is all Ganondorf really needed.

Because he's the only one playing chess, and he has the king. So it's a very swift and destructive check mate from there.

And by then, he never sees his people anymore, and he's leaned completely into the role of Hyrule's antagonist, so the character sticks, and that's who he chooses to be, until that peacocking arrogance eventually becomes, more or less, the death of him.

[mysicklove]

what did I miss mellow yellow jellow bellow bitzy butzy pookie wookie noonie shmoozie gitzy gammy gummy gummy ??

i would say not much, but that would be a big fat lie my snookems wookems silly little gumdrop sugar plum fairy

[gamma-gal-24]

🍋🍋🍋 for thee!! -@wisp-herr

THREE?? A WHOLE THREE JUST FOR ME?? 😱💞💞 Bless you kind one!😭💞

Well, since you sent three whole lemons, I shall share three whole crushes!😁👍🌸💞

-Firstly we have this shmoozy hothead!

I love Hades sm look at his littte butter knife fingers-😖💞💞 If it weren't for a specific reason I don't feel comfortable sharing, I would officially F/O him in a heartbeat. But for now, I keep my love for him on the down low.☺

-Next we have everyone's favorite littke goth sweetheart, Victor!

Cute as he is, I just can't stay attached to him like I do with my F/os, so he remains just a crush of mine for now.😌

-And last but certainly not least, I have a very special one!☺💞💞💞 I have simped for this man since I was like- 12. Yeah, I'm pretty sure I was 12. But now I'm a whole ass adult and he is STILL fine.✨👌 Mr. Gold/Rumplestiltskin from OUAT.

JUS- JUS- JUST LOOK AT EM?? This us the one I am literal SECONDS from F/Oing and making it everyone else's problem.😂 THE ONLY THING STOPPING ME IS MY INABILITY TO PUT TOGETHER A COHESIVE S/O TO PAIR HIM WITH.

[tbonechessor]

Yknow at this point "The Mcu isn't that good" is kind of a milqetoast opinion

But it takes a specific kind of person to hang on to the Mcu hype train in that "DID U HEAR THAT SHMOOZY McDIMGLE IS GONNA BE IN NEW SECRET WARZ MOVIE!?" kind of way.

And one of those people is My Boss

[goddesstrolls]

“GROOOOOOOSS.”

“My dad brought someone home. Which is FINE, WHATEVER, but he didn’t have to be all shmoozy in the kitchen where anyone could HEAR THAT SHIT.”

“I need to go pour bleach into my ears.”

[aimfor-theheart]

hello its me the wolfwood felon officce au anon im going CRAAAAAAAAZY AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH its everything i dreamed of. i just think like. criminal turned salaryman is both funny but also a meaningful softening redemption arc for such a tough guy :')

i love the balance of like. hes just a *liiittle* bit unruly for reader. but he respects them !! so cute thank you for writing i will appreciate this for the rest of my life amen

okay my thoughts behind it were that wolfwood is kinda considered this like con artist in the og?? and in tristamp he gives them that 20k check LMAOO so i was like hm. maybe sales. shmoozy…..,…was thinking his felony charge was like a con/money type of crime you know….,:.was a great salesperson……but flew too close to the sun!! bit of a crook!!

i’m just glad you liked it i really had no idea what i was doing haha i just let that one run away from me!!

thank you for submitting!! i’m so glad you enjoyed 💗💗💗

[wutheringmights]

Yesterday, I entered a fugue state and read "In the Dream House" by Carmen Mario Machado in its entirety. Obviously, I think this book was phenomenal. I couldn't put it down.

I wasn't a big fan of every story in her collection "Her Body and Other Parties" (but the story "The Husband Stitch" is one of my most favorite short stories, ever), so I was a little concern that I would also find this memoir impenetrable.

Not the case. Her skill in imagery and atmosphere is in full force. It's richly immersive. Machado said that she wrote it in order to create the basis of an archive documenting abuse in queer relationships. She more than succeeded.

This is not related to my thoughts on the memoir at all, but I want to point out that I bought this book at a bookstore in [redacted major city] that specializes in romance novels. I had intended to buy a shmoozy romance, only to spy this book on the Queer Studies shelf. It's been on my TBR for a while now, so I figured, why not?

While checking out, the cashier looked at the cover and said, "You know this is not a romance, right?"

Yup.

"Okay, good. I've had a few customers not realize that."

[kritlekro]

Haha not me feeling sad yet shmoozy romantic at the same time rn haha