#shitpost misc

[akq96618]

[sordid-dog]

[acid-ixx]

"how to become a target to the wayne family"

series masterlist

you, depressed and lonely, out of your mind laying on top of your apartment bed after a hard day of juggling multiple minimum wage jobs to pay their rent and dealing with 10 pending assignments:

you: *sighs* wish there's someone out there who loves me enough to take me somewhere far away to a place where i don't have to worry about the crippling weight of capitalism.

you, adding the next phrase to ward off your stalkers: AND I HOPE THOSE PEOPLE AREN'T MY FAMILY WHO ESTRANGED ME! they don't even count.

bruce wayne, "billionaire, not millionaire", popping out of the background as batman ignoring the last statement: your father would like to—

conner, totally not stalking you the entire day whilst planning your marriage despite not meeting you yet, right outside your apartment windows and talking to himself: don't even need to ask twice baby! we're getting married soon and everyone's invited except for your dumbass family!

tim drake, a building away from conner, spotting his best friend by the distance with his binoculars: WHY THE FUCK IS KON THERE, AND WHO DOES HE THINK HE IS?!

jason todd, preparing his weapons: he won't be there soon.

dick grayson, already seething in the background: who is HE to talk about MY baby bird who's not even at the right age for marrying yet!

damian wayne, for the first time in his life cooperating with jason, overhearing dick's rambles: do not forget to load it with kryptonite bullets, todd. and add grenades if ever the case the weapon's been compromised.

jason todd, nodding whilst he aims at kon's head: noted, kid.

*cue faint encouragement playing through the intercoms as steph, cass, babs and duke places bets on who could lay the first and the most hits on kon first; the winner can have your favorite jacket as their reward*

steph, with popcorn in her hands: yeah, it's definitely jason, look at him, all ready to mull him to death!

duke, munching on steph's popcorn: you kidding me? the little demon's about to aim his sword at the guy!

cass, whispering under her breath: it's actually dick...

barbara gordon, amused at the forming argument: wrong, all of you, tim's already out his way to de-clone his best friend.

you, unaware of the entire commotion outside of your apartment: *sneezing, from all the times your name gets mentioned* gee, no wonder why rent's abnormally lower this month, the air must've been polluted even more within this area—

[lemonwrap]

[angryblueoat]

what if YOU 🫵 were a giant moray eel 🫣 and I was a roving coral grouper 🤭 and we engaged in cooperative hunting together 😳

[dollzcomix]

maybe i will share context eventually but for now y'all get this

[murdrdocs]

parasites making me think about giving eric draven head.

the way he kisses you leading up to it. his hands on your waist and hips, gripping your flesh like he's shocked that you're here right now and he doesn't want to ever lose you. you know it's how he truly feels. it's nice to have his words reinforced in his hands.

he always puts your pleasure first, leaving you to be the bad guy when you gently glide his hands away from your cunt. he pulls away from your lips regretfully, his lips still pursed as he blinks at you through lidded eyes. his eyebrows do that thing, the one where the arches lift in a minute tick. you only notice it because you notice him.

there's an unspoken answer to an unspoken question showing itself when you slyly smile. you let your actions speak for you as you sink to your knees, settling yourself between his long legs.

"baby," he coos, as if to say you don't have to.

"baby," you affirm. i want to.

the tension in his body evaporates into the air surrounding you both as you take him into your hand and press your tongue against his tip. you lick the pre off of him, making sure to get the droplet that has fallen off to the side of him.

there are times where you tease him a bit. where you like to see how much he could take before he asked you to give him more or took matters into his own hands, which is rarer than a blue moon. he's so big and intimidating, but he always lets you set the pace. one day you'll get him to break.

usually, you give it to him straight away—wrapping your lips around his tip, flattening your tongue around the underside, sinking down as far as you could go without being as warmed up as you could be.

there are the times where he'll help warm you up, fucking your mouth with two of his fingers, sticking them far back over and over again to get you used to the motion before you took something bigger. but today, you just do the same thing with his cock, taking him deeper and deeper every time.

and each time when your gag reflex triggers around his cock, his stomach tenses, abs briefly flashing every single time.

he's pliant beneath your hands and mouth. not so intimidating when he's whining and digging his feet into the ground with efforts to keep still. he reminds you of yourself when he's like this, completely at the mercy of the other, struggling to comply by still doing so. except, when your positions are flipped, you make a point of being a bit brattish about it. your hand grips eric's hair instead of places itself on the back of his head like his hand does to you. you force him into your cunt instead of let him set the pace.

he's much kinder about it all.

he won't say it, but you know he likes it when you make a mess on his cock. when saliva pools around your mouth and dribbles down to gather in his pubes. when your eyeliner and mascara run down your cheeks. when you leave lipstick marks on his velvety skin.

you do your best to leave evidence, letting him paint your face with his cum instead of simply catching it in your mouth. you do it now, resisting the urge to flinch while you let eric guide your hand back and forth over his cock.

"you ready?" he asks, his voice breathy.

you nod, glancing at his cock once before looking back into his eyes. when his cock twitches in your hand, you pinch your eyes shut and let the warmth rain over your visage.

[lynn-tged-posting]

lloyd frontera period cramp moodboard

[paper-mario-wiki]

the genders (cheat sheet):

Women

Female., Boy

i think theres more too, actually. sorry

[fell-e]

twst no context spoilers

[eggariesalad]

hello gang !

[jellycreamjammedart]

[sordid-dog]

bug to bug communication

original post :3

[lillymakesart]

tell me im wrong im waiting

(shouting @skullzvstheworld for this idea lmfao im shaking)