#shes related to patrick star

[thresholdbb]

Janeway can’t help herself and adopts a slight Irish accent the second she steps into Sullivan’s

[boldlyvoid]

Falling For You.

[REQUEST] spencer reid x BAU!reader but they're in a secret relationship, and basically she gets him to watch all these romcoms, so when he makes a reference to something like Notting Hill or You've Got Mail and then the whole secret is blown.

warnings: mentions of lila archer, spoilers for 90s/2000s rom-coms, co-workers to lovers, love confessions, implied smut, secret relationships.

word count: 2.4k

It was no secret that the newest team member had a thing for romantic comedies. From the little jokes she made with Penelope to the quote from Pretty Woman on her travel mug, she was a walking Rom-Com reference.

Hotch understood some of the references, JJ would talk her ear off about her favourites, and even Emily and Derek would jokingly re-enact that scene from When Harry Met Sally every time they had a team lunch. It was only Spencer who didn’t get the jokes, and after having to explain them all to him 1 too many times, she finally invited him over to watch some. 

The first one they watched together was Can’t Buy Me Love. Patrick Dempsey, a loveable nerd has been saving up all summer to buy the telescope of his dreams when the girl next door accidentally ruins her mom's favourite dress and needs to buy a replacement… he ends up buying it for her on the condition that she pretends to date him so his Senior Year can be his best year yet. Spencer likes the movie overall, he wishes someone in his high school took enough pity on him to make him popular. But his favourite scene is when they go to the abandoned airplane graveyard and watch the stars in his homemade telescope. 

“I can make one of those,” Spencer whispers to her. 

“Really?” 

He nods, “It would be pretty easy… maybe we could go star gazing someday too?” He asks, biting the bullet and making this movie date the first of many dates they’d go on. 

—

The next movie they watch is Never Been Kissed. Drew Barrymore is a nerdy reporter who goes undercover at a high school and gets to relive her teen years while falling in love for the first time. Spencer likes this one because he can relate, he never had his first kiss until well into his 20s… and she was an actress, too. When he explains that to Y/N she can’t believe it, but he has the magazine photos of them saying goodbye after the case to prove it. 

“Have you kissed many people since then?” She asks, wishing he’d move a little closer to her and steal one. 

He nods, “a few.” 

“anyone good?” 

He shakes his head, “no, I’m saving the best kiss for last.” 

She looks puzzled? “What?” 

“My best kiss will be from the girl I end up marrying,” he gives her a smile and moves his hand over to hold hers. 

“Oh,” she bites back a smile and looks down at their interlocked fingers. “Have you at least met her yet?” 

“I think so…” 

“Well, then shouldn’t you kiss her to find out if she’s the right one?” She teases, leaning into his space even more. 

“I suppose you’re right,” he teases, he cups her face with his free hand and rubs his thumb over her cheek, “are you sure you’re okay with this?” 

She nods and leans in all the way this time. Effectively pressing their lips together. And even for a first kiss, it sure does feel different. It feels like her last first kiss ever. 

—

Keeping it a secret at work is hard when all they want to do is stare at each other with googly-eyes, they’ve fallen head over heels for each other and not told a single soul. No one knows about their movie dates or their real dates either. No one knows they’ve spent a whole night kissing or that they really, really, don’t mind sharing the hotel room with the two queen beds. And they definitely don’t know that they only slept in the one. Together. The whole week they were away. 

After the case ends, they head back to her apartment for their mandated 48 hours off with the pan to watch as many movies as they can. 

The third movie they watch is You’ve Got Mail. 

“Rival bookstore owners hate each other in real life, yet on the internet manage to fall madly in love with one another. Based on an older movie called The Shop Around The Corner, it’s a beloved story brought to life once again by the one and only Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan.” 

She explains every movie like this before they put it on. He’s honestly only watching them because he loves listening to her talk about them. 

“You see, they both have partners in real life but they email each other every day, as friends… but you know what it's like in movies like these,” she smirks. “Best friends who have a lot in common find it easy to fall in love.” 

“That they do,” he agrees. 

He raises his arm over the back of the couch and she sits back, leaning into his side just as his hand lands on her shoulder. They snuggle up close, she hits play and he watches with glee, not knowing this was going to become his favourite movie by the time it’s over. 

His favourite line is when two cars honk at each other and their drivers get out to argue, followed by Meg Ryan saying “Don’t you love New York in the fall?” Which is something Tom Hanks says to her in an email earlier that morning.

He loves the way the old man recalls a woman of his past and called her “enchanting” because what a wonderful thing to say about a woman.

He giggles when Tom Hanks tosses aside Pride and Prejudice cause he just doesn’t get it the way Meg's character does. But ultimately, he picks it back up because he wants to get to know her through her reading history. 

“I sympathize with Frank,” Spencer whispers as he brings out a typewriter when they have a perfectly good computer at her house. 

“I know,” she laughs. “I love the tablets at work, I can’t believe you still have Penny paint the files out for you.” 

You are a lone reed standing tall, waving boldly in the curet sands of commerce. Frank compliments Kathleen, or at least he tries to. 

Spencer giggles again. “I remember what it was like being a lone Reid,” he whispers before pressing a kiss to her cheek. 

She gets all flustered, so madly in love with him that she wants to scream it from the rooftops but it feels way too soon. They’re only 3 movies into their relationship. Maybe at 10, she’ll tell him. Till then, she looks over at him and steals a real kiss. 

Kathleen is so passionate about her books in the same way that Y/N loves her movies. Spencer sees so many similarities between them that it’s really no wonder that Tom Hanks’ character falls in love with her. Passionate, kind, beautiful women will always have a place in Spencer's heart. 

Their 4th movie is another Meg Ryan classic; When Harry Met Sally, and now Spencer understands why Derek pretends to have an orgasm when he eats a good salad… 

Their 5th movie is Notting Hill and Y/N can tell he doesn’t like it very much because unlike William Tucker, the actress who kissed Spencer never talked to him again after that. 

Their 6th movie, however, is Pretty Woman. And while they shared a bed all through the last case, they’ve never really slept together. So watching a movie all about sex and falling in love really didn’t help the frustration they were both feelings. By the time the movie ended, it was almost midnight and they should’ve been getting ready for bed. 

She gets up and heads to her room, expecting him to follow but he just stands in her doorway, watching with a bit of anxiety in his gut. 

“So…” Spencer asks. “What happens after he climbs up and rescues her?” 

She stills, her heart fills with love and she quickly makes his way to him. She cups his face in her hands, staring up at him. “She rescues him right back.” 

“Indeed you have,” he leans in and presses a quick kiss to her lips. “You know what all these movies have in common?” 

“What?” She has no idea where he’s going with this.

“They all fell in love pretty quickly, I mean just look at Vivian and Edward, it took them less than a week,” he explains. “So I don’t feel too crazy when I say… I love you, Y/N. I love you so very much.” 

“I love you, I love you, I love you,” she whispers between kisses. 

They kiss and kiss and he walks with her, leading her toward the bed where they fall in and make love for the first time. It's hot and close and emotional. It's slow and steady and perfect. It’s everything both of them have dreamed of when they finally met the one. 

— 

On their second day off they watch How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, 13 Going On 30, 50 First Dates, A Walk to Remember, 10 Things I Hate About You, and The Holiday. They would’ve gotten to more if they weren’t so wrapped up in one another. By the time they go back to work, they’ve gotten through half of her list of favourite movies. 

He’s not sure if it’s luck or coincidence or what… but their next case happens to be in New York. 

When they land, they get into their Bureau-issued SUVs and weave in and out of traffic on their way to the scene. They’re honked at multiple times and Spencer just smirks to himself. It’s not until they get out and they’re honked at once again, with some guy yelling at them to get out of his way, that Spencer turns to her and says. “Don’t you love New York in the fall?” 

She giggles and shoves him, “Shut up.” 

“It’s not the fall?” JJ remarks, not knowing why he’d say such a thing or why she’d react like that. 

“Hey, isn’t that…” Emily thinks it over for a second. “That’s a line from you’ve got mail!” 

“How would Spencer know that movie?” JJ laughs it off. 

Spencer turns to beat red with embarrassment. “I’ve seen it…” 

“You’ve seen you’ve got mail?” Derek even rides him for this slip-up. “And when do you have time to watch rom-coms?” 

“I’ve seen the original,” he lies. “It’s based on The Shop Around The Corner. My mom liked it before she got sick.” 

“Okay,” they drop it there. 

Thankfully. 

And by the time the case ends, 3 days have passed, the unsub has been booked into Jail at 9am and they’re free to go home. If they want to. Derek suggests they all go out for breakfast, and Hotch says he rather go home and sleep. JJ wants to go shopping and Emily’s right there with her. 

Spencer on the other hand, he opens his phone and sends Y/N a message. 

“There’s a place in Riverside Park at 91st street where the path curves and there’s a garden. I’ll be waiting there for you.” 

She digs her phone out of her pocket seconds later and smiles, a small sigh leaves her as her shoulders slump. She’s so in love with him it's unreal. 

“What about you, Y/N?” Emily asks her. “Do you want to come with us?” 

“No… no, I have a friend in town I want to meet up with.” 

“Looks like it’s just me and you for breakfast, pretty boy,” Derek teased, wrapping his arm around Spencer. 

He shakes his head, “Actually, I was thinking about going on a little sightseeing adventure, you know I only come to new york for work.” 

“Fine then,” Derek drops it and he, Emily and JJ watch as Spencer and Y/N head off, out of the precinct and in different directions. “I bet you ten bucks they’re meeting up.” 

“Hold on,” JJ says as she calls up Penelope. “Hey, yeah, can you tell me where Spencer and Y/N’s GPS pings in 20 minutes?” 

“I can… why?” Penny asks nervously. 

“No reason. Just a hunch.” 

When Penelope eventually calls her back all she has to say is Riverside Park at 91st Street and they know. 

—

Y/N gets there first, she’s never seen this place in person before. The flowers are even more vibrant than in the movie. There are bees dancing around every other flower, couples walking around hand in hand, people on dog walks and moms with their strollers. It’s just an average early morning in New York. 

And then she sees him. He comes rounding the corner, he’s carrying a bouquet of flowers wrapped in newspaper… at least she thinks they’re flowers. 

What they don’t notice is their friends on the other side of the garden, watching them get closer and closer until they’re chest to chest. He wraps his free hand around her waist, she cups his face in her own hands, and she stares up at him like he hung the stars just for her.  

“I wanted it to be you,” Spencer whispers what was originally Meg Ryan's line. “I wanted it to be you so badly.” 

“You sure did save the best for last,” she knows exactly what he means. 

Just as they lean in to kiss, as his lips meet hers, they hear it. Someone is playing “Somewhere Over The Rainbow” just for them. They smile into the kiss, shocked that their life is playing out like a perfectly written movie and then they see them.

It’s their own friends who played it. They’re clapping in the distance, “Woo!!” Emily cheers.

“We knew this would happen!” Derek throws in for good measure. 

They can’t help but laugh, Spencer pulls her in for another kiss, a longer, more hearty kiss. He loves her and he wants everyone to know. 

When she pulls back, she looks as though she could cry, so he extends the bouquet to her. It’s a bunch of yellow, newly sharpened number 2 pencils tied up with string. 

“Don’t you love New York in the fall?” 

“Not as much as I love you,” she says as she takes them, gladly. “Not even close.” 

General Taglist 

@ncsls0515 @stevesmunsons @reidsbookclub @sweetyyhippyy @manuosorioh @mrs-dr-reid @k-k0129 @squishyturtle @katsukis1wife @babybisexual @marsmunson86

[fbfh]

Curiosity is a Wonderful thing ch. 11

wc: 13.2k

genre: slow burn, little angst, childhood best friends to lovers

pairing: slow burn bff!ben x fem daughter of alice!reader, mal x ben (allegedly), platonic reader + mom!alice

warnings: severe mommy issues, brief touch on food scarcity and trauma, COMPHET, reader scratches her arm and bleeds a little, one use of the word purge in a non food related sense, ben has a gnarly panic attack, very mild dubcon bc mal used mind control on ben without him knowing (she didn't do anything physical with him it was just ethically questionable at the very best and the important thing is ben feels gross about it), ben very briefly contemplates involuntary manslaughter, one use of the phrase "being [someone's] bitch", comfort from reader's mom

summary: Ben and Mal go on a date. You follow a rabbit. All three of you begin to realize things of critical importance.

song recs: dream girl evil - florance and the machine, girls against god - florance and the machine, tell me I'm okay patrick - rachel bloom/crazy ex girlfriend cast, hovering - miley cyrus ft trace cyrus, when you wish upon a star ethereal remix - a.krishna, nothing is every anyone's fault - crazy ex girlfriend cast, when you wish upon a star (music box) - the by8nd, silly lullaby - natasha richardson

a/n: your outfit, your mom's outfit, optional face/voiceclaim for adult alice (it's natasha richardson)

THANK YOU GUYS SO MOTHERFUCKING MUCH FOR YOUR SUPPORT??????? LIKE WHAT THE FUCK. also as per ush (how do we phonetically spell the first part of usual????) fangz 2 cici 4 betaing lulz mcr rox. btwTHERE IS WONDERLAND TERMINOLOGY USED IN THIS CHAPTER!!!!!!! HERE IS THE GLOSSARY!!!!!!!!!! the tldr from memory is as follows:

brillig = late afternoon around when you would start cooking dinner

nunz = don't go (with a sense of urgancy/immediate importance)

gyre = to spin around and around like a gyroscope

mimsy = flimsy/miserable hybrid word (think sad wet pathetic little mewmew)

gallymoggers = cuckoo bananas crazy

so yeah!!! I think I got everyone from my asks and replies (LOVE YOU ALL SO FUCKING MUCH EVEN YOU SILENT READERS YES I LOVE YOU TOO LURKERS AND LIKERS AND SILENT REBLOGGERS <333 YOU SPECIFICALLY READING THIS RIGHT NOW) so if you wanna be added or I missed you just hoot and holler in the notes!! (or if you wanna be more anon you can message me too I don't mind in the slightest uwu)

tags @yesv01@magcon7280 @hopefullhearts @thatawkwardlittlefangirl @sunshineangel-reads @dustyinkpages @inejsknifes @tulipmagnoliaisme @ev3ningrain @yokolesbianism @ma1dita @casey1-2007 @roseidol @eaterof-concrete @enhacatalog @inejghafawifesblog @jjmaybankisawesome @leovergurl @formulas-bitch @starsdotalk @tulipmagnoliaisme @inejsknifes @ficslutt @bwormie @urmomlikeslinotoo @jazhandzzz

Mal has a lot of reasons to hate herself. She’s weak, sensitive, and incompetent at best on a good day, as her mother likes to say. She has no grit, no spite. She knows this, because she grew up hearing it. One of the last things her mother told her before shipping her off that god forsaken rock was don’t blow it. Mal knew from her words, from the frightening pleasantness in her voice and tension in her eyes what she really meant. The way she clamped her sharp nails down painfully into Mal’s shoulder - from a distance, a maternal and supportive gesture - the weight that this opportunity held. 

If you asked Maleficent for a list of all the things wrong with her daughter, she could easily fill a book. Probably several, but Mal doesn’t think she actually cares enough about her daughter to pay close enough attention to do so. If she found out her mother put that much effort into listing her flaws, she thinks that would be the most mother daughter bonding she’s ever received. She might try becoming worse somehow, just to disappoint her mother further and give her more to work with. 

Many of the things her mother thought of her, she had started to believe over time. But now, Mal finds herself in an unusual, almost funny position of being able to add a new failure, a new flaw to that eternally winding, growing list. 

Mal is getting attention from a boy. And worse, she likes it. 

So really, it’s two for one. 

Being around Ben felt weird at first. He kept trying to kiss her, which was… gross. Mal justified it as being above all that, being too wicked and rotten for mushy gushy matters of the heart. Maybe it’s really because it’s just… too much. It’s all so much, happening so fast. A week or two ago she couldn’t be alone with anyone without trying to figure out who was going to shank who first. 

She knows that’s not how Auradon works, she knows the crime rate here is basically zero, and she wonders if she’ll ever be able to shake that feeling. Like being safe is somehow worse than being in danger. At least danger is familiar. That’s probably why she’s able to strut playfully across the rickety old rope bridge the way she is. Behind her, Ben chuckles nervously, holding tight onto the sides.

It was annoying at first, all the attention. She laughed about it with Evie. Or she tried to, at least. But the more time they spend in this frilly princess infested hellhole, the more Mal notices Evie seeming… different. Their banter and mean spirited jokes that flowed so easily seem to have evaporated overnight. 

She can tell Evie’s not as into it anymore. No one else could, but Mal can. She wonders if this means Evie isn’t as into her anymore. Mal wouldn’t call them friends. She wouldn’t call any of her friends friends. But no one would ever deny the bond, the loyalty between the four of them. The thought of Evie drifting away, pulling back from her like this hurts. It would be so much better if she just full on betrayed Mal, stabbing her in the back and sabotaging her. At least that way, they’d still be speaking the same language.

She thought if anyone would be excited about getting some idiotic prince in her clutches, a figurehead to manipulate and make dance like a puppet, it would be Evie. But now, for the first time in her life, Mal feels like she cares more about boys, about bagging a prince than Evie does. It’s strange. It’s unfamiliar, uncomfortable, and she doesn’t know how to fix it. How to make things normal again. 

It’s not like she could even call Evie out on it, either. She’s being normal enough. Mal could see her beaming ear to ear with that dazzling, blinding smile before she even got the question out of her mouth - will you help me get ready for my… date? She gagged a little when she said that, but Evie was too busy hugging her and talking about what to do with her hair to even notice. When they talked about dresses and blush undertones - something she’s still not sure she fully understands - things were great. They were better than normal, she felt like she and Evie were more in sync than they have been in years. It felt good.

 It’s when she brought up Ben that she noticed Evie’s light dim a little. Her heart just wasn’t in it. So Mal did what she does best. She deflected. She started talking about split ends, and kibbe types, and other stuff Evie has encyclopedic knowledge about that Mal has never even heard of, and just like that - boom. The sparkle was back in Evie’s eyes, the sincerity back in her smile. So Mal swore to herself that she just wouldn’t bring him up. Unfortunately, that’s proving to be easier said than done. 

Ben isn’t making things any easier for her, either. He’s been so nice, so disgustingly kind and considerate that it makes Mal sick. The worst part, the thing that really fills her with dread and sickening disgust is that he’s been like this the whole time. Before this stupid spell and the stupid cookie, before the stupid tourney game. He’s been thoughtful and considerate and kind, and good since the moment they stepped foot out of the limo. If limos don’t normally come filled with candy, that means he was good and kind even before they got to Auradon.

She feels giddy around him. Sick, and giddy. Despite everything, despite a lifetime of training for this, she can’t stop leaning into it, indulging herself. It’s so fucking stupid, she barates herself even as she turns and smiles at Ben, lets him guide her through the forest. 

“Tell me something about yourself you’ve never told anyone,” Ben requests gently, so gently it makes her flinch. For a moment, she’s pulled out of her spiraling maelstrom of self loathing.

“Um…” She hums out loud, silently letting herself revel in this feeling of captivating someone. Not scaring them, not grabbing them by the jaw and locking eyes while hers flare green, imposing her will, but actually having someone want to listen to her. Voluntarily, and not under threat of bodily harm. 

“My middle name is Bertha.” 

Ben chuckles behind her, and she turns back around away from him quickly so she doesn’t have to look at him. She’s not even sure if that’s true, and for the first time, she feels a dull pang of guilt for lying. It sounds stupid, the kind of thing no one would lie about, but Mal doesn’t even know if she has a middle name. She doesn’t know if she has a last name, other than Young Mistress of Evil, but having an embarrassing middle name sounds like something that other normal people her age would experience. 

So she goes with Bertha. 

She makes some little comment about her mom, and it gets a laugh out of Ben, one she tries to laugh along with.

“Mine’s Florian.” Ben says in understanding. “Ben Florian Lemaitre-Alarie Leroy de le Lumme-Mont.” 

Mal turns her head away, but she can still feel his eyes on her. 

“Wow. How princely.” She quips. 

“Yeah,” he chuckles, trying to look at her. She starts walking again. “It’s- it’s a mouthful…” 

He follows her closely, and soon they reach the end of the bridge. 

“Okay, close your eyes.” He instructs, placing his hand on her shoulder to stop her. 

Her stomach drops. Her brow furrows, and she shifts away from him on instinct. 

“Why…?” She asks skeptically. 

He pauses for a moment, then laughs sweetly at her reaction. 

“It’s okay, it’s just a surprise.” He says, his voice so earnest she can almost bring herself to believe him. “You’ll be okay. I promise.” 

Sixteen years of muscle memory force her to dig in her heels, to throw his allegedly good word out the window. But against her better judgment, her mind clouded with that squishy sappy dizzy feeling, that contact high she’s been getting from being around him too much, she reluctantly agrees. She knows that Ben won’t harm her because he can’t - not as long as she’s in his head.

She thinks back to the relief that flooded her when she finally pieced the plan together. She had two obvious choices; a love spell, or some sort of mind control. Mind control would have been ideal, she thought. It’s more predictable, plus it will score her some major points with her mother. 

She thought about  how great it would be, following in her footsteps and hypnotizing Ben with incorporeal hypnosis, just like her mother had hypnotized Audrey’s to touch the spinning wheel. 

She tried her hardest, she really had. But it turns out that hypnosis with eye contact or an artifact is already hard enough to begin with. Incorporeal hypnosis is about a thousand times harder. Worse off, Mal had never been able to practice magic a day in her life. All she knew until recently was theoretical second hand knowledge, gleaned from her mother’s drunken recollections of the good old days after a few too many absinth martinis. 

Mal never knew how her mom could drink that stuff. She once tried a pinky dip of the poison ivy infused gin her mother made to use in her drinks, and quickly realized it was a terrible mistake. It tasted like bitter greens and itchy, fiery spice. Her mouth was burned for a week, but her mother could easily down two or three over dinner, insisting the poison ivy gives it just the kick it needs. She asked her mother about it once, and shocked Mal when she actually answered her question instead of glaring or going off on another delusional tangent. 

“Oh, it’s a dragon thing.” She sighed. “Once you’ve had fire in your mouth, nothing tastes strong enough.”

For a moment, Mal could pretend this was what things were always like. They were always a normal mother and normal daughter. She always got advice and anecdotes from her mom. She’d get scolded if she came home scraped up or too late because her mother always cared enough to notice. Then Maleficent grabbed her shoulder, bringing Mal to look out the window at Auradon with her. 

“Someday you’ll know what I mean. After your first time transforming, you’ll understand.” She had chuckled. For a moment, just one moment, Mal dared to see the faintest glimmer of hope on the horizon. Maybe things will get better, her mother will care about her, be proud of her already. 

“Because one day, Mal, we’re going to get out of this dump… and onto the throne. Right where we belong…”

That was the day she’d been forced to let go of that hope. Her mother doesn’t care about her, just that she can have an extra pair of hands, a faster set of reflexes and a sharper pair of eyes. But she never quite let go of making her mother proud. That still seemed like something she could try for. 

That’s how she came up with the whole cookie angle. She found a simple amplification and extension spell, and managed to bake it into a cookie. Once Ben ate it, the spell would be absorbed into his system longer, making it easier to control him. After days and days of research, she came to two conclusions - one shocking, the other terrifying. Shocking was that love spells don’t actually exist. The only ones she could find word of were gimmicky ads in gossip magazines, and even those were few and far between. That’s when the second realization hit. She has to figure out how to make hypnosis work. That’s her only hope, her only chance.

Ben’s hands are strong on her waist, strong enough to make her jump and pull her from the memory that seemed to envelop her out of nowhere, hiding her from the world. She lets him guide her through the unfamiliar terrain. She tries to shake the memories, tries to get rid of that sinking, disorienting, cold feeling. Right now, she has a part to play. She has to be a good girlfriend, she has to get the wand and make her mother proud. 

It’s all part of the plan. It’s part of the evil scheme, that’s why she’s acting so coy and flirtatious, that’s why she’s letting Ben keep his hands on her waist and guide her gently through the forest, his voice soothing in her ear as he instructs her on where to turn and where any rocks and branches might block her path. She keeps telling herself, reminding herself of this because maybe if she tells herself enough, she’ll be able to ignore the fact that she’s enjoying it, leaning into the attention and safe presence of Ben’s big hands and strong chest behind her. 

“Oh, watch your foot… there you go.” He coaxes, guiding her past an overgrown shrub, careful to make sure she doesn’t get scratched up. “You good?”

He asks so gently, so sincerely, that Mal feels herself almost shrinking back a little. 

“Yeah,” she says lightly, with a forced chuckle.

“Good,” he breathes, and she can hear the smile in his voice. He moves her so easily, positioning her so she stands just in front of him, his chest to her back. She doesn’t like how small and… dainty, and pretty, and fragile she feels around him. It’s intoxicating and terrifying.

“Okay,” he says, gentle voice spiking with anticipation. He rubs his hands up and down her arms softly, struggling to stifle his excitement. 

“Ready? Open.” She hesitates, then complies. She sucks in a breath, eyes widening at the most breathtaking thing she’s ever seen. 

Covered in ivy, and vines blooming with morning glory and lilac, an open air greek pavilion sits in the middle of an enticing, crystal clear lake. Even though only half of the pillars and colonnades remain, the circular stone base is solid. Buttery golden sunlight dapples peacefully through the lush flora and plant life all around them, hiding it from sight. 

The lake itself - calm and so blue it’s almost green - is surrounded by rocky, grassy bluffs, just high enough to dive off of. To Mal’s shock, nothing around her looks… menacing. The cliffs aren’t jagged and ominous, the water isn’t murky and threatening. The rocks are smooth. Inviting, even. The crumbling pavilion itself seems like it’s been worn away from time, not from neglect or destruction. There’s no litter or trash, there’s no graffiti, no broken beer bottles or cigarette butts. 

It all seems so… welcoming. Safe, and friendly. Peaceful. After a moment of basking in the haven of tranquility before her, she notices a blanket spread out on the middle of the stone floor. It’s a bright, vibrant blue, and is free of any stains or patches or holes. Laid out on top of the blanket like something from a magazine is a spread of the freshest, juiciest, most wonderful looking food she’s ever seen. 

She gasps softly, turning to look at him, and sees he’s been looking at her the whole time. She studies his face for a moment, trying to figure out if this really is all for her. His smile tells her everything she needs to know. She lets out another breathy gasp as she turns back to the pavilion, feeling like it’s the sort of thing you’re supposed to do in this situation. 

She knows it’s all pretend, playing the part of the pretty damsel like this. The type of girl who’s wanted, who strong, influential people like Ben always protect. Somehow, knowing that it’s pretend doesn’t get rid of the way it feels - the good feelings, or the sickening ones. 

When the rocks have magically moved themselves to form a footpath onto the pavilion, Mal lets Ben guide her some more, and sit her down for their thing. Even thinking the word date still feels strange and uncomfortable. She’s quickly distracted from the uncomfortable knowledge that she’s on a date by how good the food is. 

Good doesn’t even begin to cut it, it’s delicious. Better than that, but she can’t think of anything better than delicious. It’s the kind of food she used to dream about, the kind that would show up in lavish spreads and banquets. She would always stuff her face as much as she possibly could, wanting to get enough before she woke up. Before it could disappear. 

“Is this your first time?” Ben asks softly, a knowing smile on his face. She startles slightly, forgetting he was there for a moment. 

“Um…” She starts, licking the powdery sugar off her fingers. “We don’t really date on the Isle. It’s more like gang activity.”

Ben chuckles, but it’s really not an exaggeration. 

“I meant your first time trying a jelly donut.” He clarifies sweetly. She pauses. She’s rudely awakened by that contextualizing feeling of abnormality. No, everyone doesn’t grow up not knowing their fruits and vegetables. No, everyone isn’t used to living off scraps and whatever can be scrounged together. It’s not a common, shared experience to have soggy boxes stacked up with nutraloaf bars shipped in on rat infested barges as an after school snack. 

She blinks, trying to pull herself back to the present. 

“Is it bad?” She asks cutely. Ben doesn’t chuckle like she expects. It doesn’t seem to land as endearing with him, but as a genuine question. 

“Not-”

Her eyes flare green before he can finish. Once they do, Ben chuckles. He leans closer to her, smiling softly.

Wipe the sugar off her cheek. Caress her. Act like you mean it.

No sooner does she transmute the orders into his mind that he complies. He leans in as he does, more invested in the sticky powdered sugar dusting her lips, and has her mirror his gestures. 

“Go like this…?” He says, licking the sides of his own lips where sugar sits on hers. She does, and he giggles again before reaching over to brush the rest off. Mal smiles, looking away coyly. 

“Can’t take me anywhere, I guess…” She looks away and bats her eyes like she’s seen Evie do before. Even though it’s familiar, it feels staged and contrived. It doesn’t feel natural, but like something that anyone in her position should do, so she does it. She glances down at her hands to look for any remaining sugar, and for the first time she can ever recall, she finds herself bothered by the jagged edges of her bitten nails, the chips in her worn down purple polish. 

Across from her, Ben is looking at the ground near a big old elm tree. Mal adjusts in her seat, but he doesn’t notice. She stares at him more intently, but he’s still looking off into the distance, transfixed by the place where the gnarled roots and lumpy trunk meet the grass. The illusion around Mal begins to crack. The immersion of playing princess to his doting prince starts to slip as she realizes that for the first time since casting the spell, she doesn’t have his full attention. Her expression grows stony with a cold, sick feeling as she watches his distant, almost melancholic gaze fixed on the tree.

“A tumtum what?” He had asked you one day with a chuckle.

“A tumtum tree!” You’d exclaimed back with a smile, as though you were having to explain to him something as common as clouds or air or tea. You had sighed playfully, gesturing with your hands as you explained.

“Tumtum trees have only ever been found in Wonderland. They’re quite large, even their seeds are around the size of your fist. They look like…”

You trail off, trying to think of a suitable comparison. Ben waits. He’s used to this, these pauses in your descriptions of Wonderland. The problem that you’ve found when trying to tell him about your home down there is that not everything is always like something else. It can be quite hard to describe something out of nothing, or nothing out of something. No sooner had the perfect thing popped into your mind.

“An elm tree.” You exclaim with a resolute snap of your fingers. You nod in satisfaction as you clarify, “Like a wych elm tree. A bit, at least.”

“Like which elm tree?” Ben asks, unsure if he had heard you correctly. 

“Exactly.” You nod confidently, drawing a confused, familiar smile from him. Ben watches you in fascination as you continue to describe the trees in question.

“Tumtum trees are usually quite friendly. Good at watching over one when one should find oneself in need of a cat nap.” You state, nodding surely. “Good conversationalists, too.”

Ben lets out a laugh, free and organic from his chest. 

“I forgot trees can talk down there,” he says.

“Some of them,” you say, then nod solemnly. “Some prefer other methods of communication, like pelting those they dislike with acorns, or pollen.”

He laughs again, contagiously, and it begins to spread to you as you continue.

“The most notable thing about tumtum trees is their roots and their bases. They’re usually quite big and tangled, curling in and out in lumpy little nests and sprawling through themselves-”

Ask about her.

It grabs him by the neck, roughly yanking him from his thoughts. He’s pulled from the pleasant memory of you, the voice destructively ripping through his train of thought. 

Look at her. Look at her. You have to know everything about her right now. You’re dying to know everything about her. 

The orders repeat over and over in his mind, his eyes glassy and green for the shortest moment as he’s locked into Mal’s toxic glower. The words begin to ring true. He finds himself burning with an almost painful need to know every possible detail about her. He leans closer to her.

“Tell me everything about yourself.” He asks, only hearing the question for the first time as it leaves his lips.

Mal smiles, acting surprised and flattered by the question she made him ask.

“Well,” she starts with a soft sigh, as if trying to find where to begin, “I’m sixteen. I’m an only child, and… I’ve only ever lived in one place.”

The poisonous light glows from her eyes for a moment, casting strange shadows around them. Ben responds quickly, as if he were waiting for a cue. 

“So am I! We have so much in common already,” he laughs, leaning closer. Mal laughs too, leaning away. 

“No, not as much as you might think.” She glances away, then back up at him. “Anyway, you’re going to be king soon, huh?”

Ben’s laughter grows stale, and he begins to get that distant look again, the same one he had when looking at the elm tree.

“A crown doesn’t make you a king.” He says softly, more to himself than to Mal. 

“Well… it kind of does, yeah.” Mal says dryly. She waits for another laugh, but no laughter comes.

“Your mother is the mistress of evil, my parents are the poster for goodness, but-” he hesitates, searching for the right words. “That doesn’t mean we’re automatically like them.” 

He finishes quietly, eyes falling down to his signet ring. Even with his mind a blank slate, weaved around Mal’s fingers like an obedient snake, he can still feel all the pressure, all that he has to live up to. Everything he wants to be is still right on the horizon. 

“We choose who we’re going to be.” He finishes softly.

Across from him, Mal’s heart pounds. She didn’t make him say any of that. She didn’t tell him to, he did it himself. He said that she’s not like her mom. He said that. Her heart pounds, and she wants so badly for him to say it again. His words ring in her mind like a bell, over and over. We choose who we’re going to be. No one had ever said that, or anything remotely like that to her before. No one had ever made her believe it. 

Those strange shadows dance across Ben’s face again, and Mal squeezes her trembling hands, trying to calm herself. 

Say it again, Ben. Tell her. Say she’s not evil. Say it. Tell her right now. Tell her she’s not evil. You don’t think she’s evil.

He leans in even closer. He moves his hand onto her cheek. He locks eyes with her, oblivious to the shared glowing green light between them. 

“I can look into your eyes and… tell you’re not evil.” He says with certainty. “I can see it.”

He moves closer, letting his eyes drift shut softly, tilting his head to the side-

Mal jerks away, letting go of the active control with a sudden drop. She lets out an uncomfortable laugh, scooting away from him. The pressure on his chest eases, and it almost feels like he can think again. Having a modicum of control over his thoughts and actions again, he stands up. He nods his head, gesturing for Mal to join him. 

“Come on. Let’s go for a swim.”

“Uh-” Mal falters, eyes darting between Ben and the water. “Um, no. I think I’m okay.”

“It’ll be fun,” Ben coaxes with a smile. 

“I- I think I’m gonna stay behind and try a strawberry. I’ve literally never had a strawberry before.”

She grabs a nice juicy berry and bites in, humming performatively for Ben. It takes a moment for the flavors to explode in her mouth. She can’t believe something so delicious could come from a plant. It’s so sweet, and a little bit tangy, but in a good way. It’s a different sort of sweet than sugar, though. She can’t put her finger on exactly what it is, but there’s a light twist, a depth and complexity to the taste that she never could have imagined. It somehow tastes like a bright clear morning and a darkening rich sunset all at the same time.

“Mmmh…” She hums, for real this time, taking another bite. She eats the whole berry - stem and leaves included - and Ben chuckles softly. He says something she doesn’t catch, then goes off to swim. The moment he leaves, Mal has only two things on her mind. 

Strawberries are fucking delicious, and Evie is going to love this. All of this. Picnics, strawberries, pagodas or pavilions or whatever the hell they’re called. She can see it clear as day; taking Evie out here with Carlos and Jay, the two of them can sit and talk while the boys are off splashing in the water. Evie will be so excited that she makes her and Mal matching sundresses in their colors - blue and gold, and purple and green. 

They can eat strawberries and laugh when the juice gets everywhere. They can throw shells and tourney balls into the lake for Carlos and Jay to get to keep them busy while she and Evie talk. Mal will scoff and laugh and roll her eyes when Evie reminds them all to wear sunscreen. She and Carlos will agree, but Jay will insist he doesn’t need any, and they’ll spend the following week treating his sunburn. Evie will insist on braiding Jay’s hair or twisting it up into some kind of bun or ponytail so it doesn’t get tangled. 

She’ll make Mal hold all the bobby pins and hair ties, and she’s sure Evie will have some sort of goop to put in Carlos’s hair so the water doesn’t turn it green. What’s that called again? Evie had been going on and on to Mal before they left for Auradon about how some water can turn blonde hair green. Cholera? Fluorine? Chlor… chlorine maybe? Yeah, that sounds right. There’s no chlorine in the water in the Isle, but since it can affect your hair, Mal’s not surprised that Evie knows everything about it. She doesn’t know if lake water has chlorine, but she’s sure if hair is on the line that Evie will be cautious. 

She’s only pulled from her hazy strawberry high when the berries have run out. She catches a remaining drop of strawberry juice on her finger from the edge of the bowl, and brings it to her lips. She looks around and sees Ben on top of one of the taller grassy bluffs. He waves at her, and after a moment she waves back hesitantly. She looks at his swim trunks, then yells across the lake.

“Are those little crowns on your shorts?”

Ben smiles a little, remembering when you had helped him pick them out. 

“Maybe,” he calls back. 

He lets out a loud, animalistic roar, then jumps.

She looks away before he hits the water. Her eyes fall down to the empty bowl of strawberries, the ones Evie would love. The ones Ben provided her with. She starts to relax a little now that he’s not watching her. Her facade, her perfect princessy persona starts to slip. She relaxes - her shoulders, her jaw, her posture, the grip she keeps on Ben. 

She takes a few deep breaths, trying to reorient herself, to figure out how she feels. She’s so confused, unused to acting sweet - at all, but especially around other people. She has to keep it together. She needs to use these few minutes of Ben swimming to make sure she has her head on straight and her eyes on the prize. She has to stay focused, stay grounded. 

She clenches her fists so tightly that her nails, bitten short and chipped with a deep plum polish, dig into her palms. 

She hopes the slight sting will get her head back where she needs it. The pain is good. A reminder of where she came from, what she’s here to do. She tries, but this time, it’s not enough. Not anymore. She shakes her head a little, hoping it will clear her mind, make her feel like herself again. Her hair is fried under all the purple dye, and she can tell it’s growing frizzy from the humidity and movement. She lets out an annoyed huff, and reaches up, trying to fuss with it until it looks like Evie made it look before. 

Are you kidding? The thought shows up suddenly as she catches herself worrying about her hair of all things. Realization sets in that not even that is enough to snap her back to herself. A sense of shame washes over her as she realizes how deep in all this she’s getting. In the moments after that realization, her mind begins to wander. It goes further and further from anything she had ever let herself think before. 

Maybe she could… make this work. Maybe there’s a shot at pulling it off. If she could keep Ben under her spell a little longer than necessary, she could make him fall in love with her for real. She can implant so many thoughts and repeating orders until it scrambles his brain and… makes it real somehow. Then he’ll want to look after Mal on purpose, not on principle. He can get her and her friends into witness protection or something, get some guard gargoyles and knights to watch over them.

She can talk Ben into giving her a little cottage deep in the woods - it will be safest for them there anyway. And that’s what he wants, for them to be safe. He wants that because Mal wants that, and when a prince like Ben loves someone, he makes sure they have whatever they want most. And what Mal wants most is a safe, secure, roomy cottage in the woods for her and Evie, Jay and Carlos. They’ll have a little lake just like this one, and maybe like, some ducks or something. Cats, or snakes, or whatever makes a good pet. 

Jay can chop the firewood, and Carlos can fix the computers whenever they get weird. Mal still barely understands how to use smartphones and dropbox, but Carlos has taken to all that stuff like… well, like his mom takes to furs. She’ll make sure there’s a nice big room for Evie to sew, and she won’t complain as much when Evie uses her as a dress form. They’ll have more delicious, fresh food than they can eat, and they won’t need to worry about any of this anymore.

She’ll reluctantly let Evie teach her how to use blush, and style hair. 

They’ll sit in the nice sunshine in the fresh clean air all day. She’ll make Evie crowns from all the pretty flowers that grow here so she can have as many crowns and tiaras as she wants, and Jay and Carlos can play tourney and climb trees and do whatever else they’re always doing. She can see it clear as day; Evie’s head resting in Mal’s lap while Mal uses her spellbook to weave together flowers, enchanting them to make them sparkle while Jay and Carlos laugh and roughhouse nearby. 

They’ll still share bedrooms. That’s the one thing Mal has actually kind of liked since moving to Auradon, sleeping in the same room as Evie. Getting to be close to her. She’s sure Jay and Carlos sleep better knowing they’re not by themselves, too. Maybe if the cottage is kind of small she and Evie can share a bed. She’d be fine with that. They’ll bake non magic cookies and eat strawberries, Evie will have all the ingredients she needs to make every kind of face mask and hair mask and lotion she could dream of. 

Ben will come and check in on them sometimes. Not very often, just once in a while. He’ll stop by and make sure they’re safe and protected and left alone all the time, because that’s what princes do when they’re in love with someone. They’ll never leave unless they want to, and they’ll have VIP tickets to all the balls and galas and sporting events in Auradon. Mal will go with them, because she knows things wouldn’t be the same if she stayed behind. Even though parties are boring and sports are dumb. But as long as Evie’s having a good time, she’s sure she can handle it. 

If only… if only she could figure out that it’s a sure thing. Then she’d be all the way in. 

You can’t recall a time your heart pounded in your chest like a jackrabbit as it does now, as you tread through roots and bushes and grassy forest terrain to the enchanted lake. You’ve been following the white rabbit who had alerted you to Ben’s whereabouts until you arrived at the lake. You find a little hidey-hole in the brush and gnarled roots of an old elm tree within eyeshot of the pavilion, and crouch down. You can almost make out what he’s saying, but not quite.

You fumble for your teapot bag, digging around for something you’re sure must still be in there. 

“Come on, come on…” you murmur frantically. You let out a gasp as your fingers close around the monocle, and you pull it out quickly. You’d pawned it off a ring of ring-a-ding worms in Wonderland several months ago. You weren’t sure how trustworthy they were - which usually means not very trustworthy at all if you’re doubting it in the first place - but you simply couldn’t help yourself. The monocle was a very old sort of subtitling spectacle, a kind of eyewear that lets you see what people are saying. They’re not always right, nor are they always perfect, but right now you’re desperate.

“Please please work,” you ask the glass silently before holding it up to your left eye. You squint at Ben and Mal, and between the fragments of conversation reaching your ears and the monocle, you’re able to understand things a bit better. 

“...You’re not evil. I can see it.” Ben says to Mal, as you watch and listen to his words intently. The sun is closer to setting and brillig draws nearer, basking everything in that not quite sunset glow. You try to crawl closer to see and hear better, not even noticing when you nearly lose one of your shoes in your efforts. You rub your eyes in disbelief, waiting to see what they say next. An elm leaf falls, tangling itself in your hair, and you find yourself unable to believe what you’re seeing. If you were using two monocles, you would surely dismiss it as the subtitle spectacles breaking. Unfortunately, there’s no disguising the truth you see before you. 

Ben leans in to kiss Mal, and you recoil backwards, suddenly and in shock. Your stomach twists in that terrible way, and you’re sure you’re going to be sick. You grip the grass tightly, hoping it will stop your head from spinning. This doesn’t make sense. None of this makes any sense, or nonsense at all. The world around you makes positively nothing. You can deal with chaos, with spontaneity, but this? This is just cruel. The world is… mean for making you live through this. 

You summon a rabbit hole back down to Wonderland faster than you can blink. You tumble down, dirt sprinkling down on you as you fall. Right before you’re swallowed by the earth, you scratch your arm on a rough patch of bark and roots. You catch a glimpse of your blood and tears falling in beads before you’re shrouded in darkness, blurry and delicate. They dance together like pained flurries of your heart and mind’s shared turmoil. You let yourself fall carelessly, the stuffy air disturbed by your stifled sobs slipping out where you don’t want them to. 

You don’t plan on staying long at all. You just need a few moments to collect yourself, to gather your thoughts. You take in a few deep, heavy breaths, your brow furrowing with determination. You must overcome this. You must stay focused. You have to if you’re going to have any chance at helping Ben. You let out a sharp breath with a sharp little noise attached to it, and you can feel your head coming back in place. There will be time to deal with all of this, there will be time to cry, but that time is not now.

The second Mal turns away and pulls her face from his gentle embrace, Ben takes in a deep, panting breath, feeling like his chest is suddenly less tight than it had been. He hadn’t noticed it before, but he feels the absence of his contracting muscles and shallow breaths now that they’re gone. He immediately looks back over to that elm tree, the one he was looking at before. For a moment, just a moment, he could swear he saw your fingertips, the ends of your hair, the dark glint of your silky blackberry bow falling into the earth. But he blinks, and whatever might have been there or not is gone too quickly to tell.

He shakes his head a little, hoping to reorient himself, but a breeze blows by and he could swear on anything there’s a trace of your scent carried in the air. The faintest hint of something so quintessentially you - your perfume, your smell, your blood. His chest squeezes again, this time with longing. 

He’s about to realize how long it’s been since he saw you, about to realize this is the longest he’s gone without even speaking a word to you, but something drags him back, keeping his thoughts here and now. He turns back to Mal, with that dull, throbbing headache he hasn’t been able to shake since the tourney game. 

“Let’s go swimming.” 

The enchanted lake is one of Auradon’s hidden gems. It was a gift to the newly united front of Auradon as a whole from the gods of Olympus; a thank you, an offering of goodwill for assisting in the containment of Hades. Hercules and Megara had gone through many lengthy strategy sessions and battle plans with Adam and Belle, trying to figure out how to prevent Hades from another attempt to overthrow Olympus. Adam and Belle knew that Hades was dangerous - he is a god after all - but they had no idea the extent and reach of his power. 

The First Villain Uprising was a dark time that spread over many years. Most people know the events of VU1; the poison apples, the sleeping curses and dark magic. They’re familiar enough with the coups and the curses, the unregulated dark magic running rampant through the land, wielded by power hungry loonatics. Villains. Brave leaders and heroes in countries from down near the Southern Isles to way up north in Winter’s Keep refused to cower in the face of evil. They did everything they could to stop it, and for many years the villains were presumed dead. 

The problem came from all the different countries not having a united front, not communicating with each other. There was no teamwork, no global council, so no one knew that the moment Maleficent was pierced through the heart by the sword of truth was the same moment Hades had managed to claw his way out of the river styx. The first thing he did once he got his bearings was drag Maleficent down to the underworld. She wasn’t dead, not quite yet, and they both saw the opportunity before them. A combination of Maleficent’s dark fairy magic and Hades’ rule over the souls of the dead meant they could drag the worst villains back from the depths. 

That was the start of the Second Villain Uprising. 

When the rulers figured out what was happening, they knew they had to band together, be stronger as a whole. That’s when Adam gathered up as many kings and queens as he could to start planning the first crusades. Fairy Godmother sent word out to the most powerful wizards and fairies and sorcerers she could, pleading for them to join the fight against evil. 

It didn’t take long to start rounding up villains, but they needed somewhere to put them. Eventually, Fairy Godmother devised a plan. With the help of Merlin of Camelot, Yensid of Schwartzvald, the Great Genie of Agrabah, and the Three Good Fairies of the Moors, they were able to create a magic barrier around an abandoned isle off the southern coast of Belle and Adam’s kingdom. This became known as the Isle of the Lost, the only secure place where villains and all the evil they bring with them can’t escape. 

As a thank you to the mortals down below, the gods gifted them with the enchanted lake, right in the heart of Auradon. Each god added a blessing or a gift of some kind, which is how it got such steadfast healing properties and good magic. The lake itself is magical, which is something that Belle and Adam decided not to advertise during the aftermath of the expulsion of evil. 

There was so much terror and fear in the land, people afraid of something going wrong, of some new villain popping up right when they let their guard down. Adam and Belle decided to keep the lake’s properties under wraps for the most part, preemptively stopping any attempts to stockpile or weaponize magic purely to get the upper hand in a magic cold war that has long since ended. 

The cleansing and healing properties of the enchanted lake are simplistic, but effective. Ben remembers a time when he was young, there was a brief few weeks when Adam seemed to lose control over shifting his form from man to beast. His condition was ultimately traced back to stress, a comorbid symptom of some nasty migraines, and high cholesterol. 

Rumors of his condition began to circulate, and Adam found himself splashed across the covers of gossip rags on newsstands and store checkouts. Fairy Godmother was able to fix him right up, and instructed him to fully submerge himself in the enchanted lake once a week for about a month or so. He followed her instructions to the letter, and was soon back to rights.  

As he stands on the small cliffside overlooking the serene, enticing water, Ben’s not sure what jogged that memory, or why it’s at the front of his mind right now. He shakes his head a little, but it keeps coming back, tugging at him like a child vying for their fathers attention. 

“Are those little crowns on your shorts?”

Ben glances over at the pavilion where Mal sits. He looks down, then chuckles.

“Maybe,” he calls back. Their eyes lock as Mal gathers her thoughts. Ben can feel it, the tightness coming back in his chest. Before it reaches all the way up to his head, his instincts kick in. He lets out a loud roar, then he jumps.

The water hits his skin. Instead of cool and refreshing, just the way he remembers it, it feels like a freezing cold burn. The world goes quiet as he sinks deeper and deeper into the lake, eyes widening in shock at the unpleasant, almost painful feeling. His skin burns, and he scratches at his arms and legs and chest. His hands move, frantic and sluggish in the water as he itches his neck, then his cheeks, then his head…

He freezes, muscles relaxing, limbs falling still as the water soothes him and purges the last of the fizzing magic out of him. He had no clue what was happening until it was over, and now, hovering underwater, it’s over. He knows he can’t have been down there for too long, but it’s when his instincts scream at him to hyperventilate that he realizes he’s still underwater. His eyes widen, and he fumbles, swimming to a rock hidden from the shore. 

He drags himself out of the water, chest heaving, body shaking. The surface of the rock is smooth, but he struggles to maintain his balance. He manages to flip over and lean back on the rock, praying for some stability. His free will, his mind, his cognizance is all coming back to him at once. He feels like a computer flashing a blue screen from too many programs running and downloading at the same time. 

He clutches his chest, unable to control his breathing. The disorientation starts to fade and his eyes widen with horror as the reality of the situation starts to set in, cutting through the painful panic gripping him. Mal… drugged him. Or worse, cursed him. His stomach drops, twisting sickeningly, his hands trembling out of control. He’s not normally like this. He never lets himself get like this. He heard stories about extremely powerful villains being able to use mind control or hypnosis on rare occasions, but he never expected it to feel so… violating. 

His gaze drifts downward to the rippling water. No one can know about this. This can never get out. If even a whisper of this gets out, the consequences and aftermath would suffocate him. She just jeopardized the entire future of the United Republic of Auradon. She could very well have just pounded nail after nail into the coffin containing the lives and futures of all those poor kids stuck on the Isle, the ones she claimed to care so much about. She may have destroyed lives, futures, an entire nation, for… what? 

He tries to figure out why. Why would she do this? She has to have some sort of motivation for reaching into his brain and jerking him around like a puppet, making a fool of himself in front of the public. Oh god- he thinks, remembering the tourney game. He never acts like that. He never acts erratic or impulsive. What must his parents think of him? What must you be thinking of him right now? Or the entire country? 

His throat tightens up as he starts to panic again, mind already clouded by the doom of plummeting in the polls. He’s unopposed for king, but after a disaster like this, who would want him? Someone else will run and win, because no one in their right mind would trust someone who voluntarily lets themself become a villain’s personal sock puppet to run a goddamn country! He breathes harder, flexing his fists open and closed until his knuckles go white. Why would she do something like this? What does she want from him, a second date?

He pauses. That must be it. A new wave of rage overcomes him as he realizes - unless he’s given a miraculously better explanation for this - that Mal pressed a self-destruct button for the entirety of Auradon because she has a crush on him. A stupid, goddamn teenage crush. And now his political career will be over before it could ever start because of it. He’s going to be the first king to be impeached before he’s crowned. He can’t stop spiraling, can’t stop the racing thoughts drowning him above the water. 

A loud, animalistic roar tears from his chest. It’s much more primal, more beast-like than he ever allows himself to be, but he supposes that it’s understandable for something like that to slip out given the circumstances he finds himself in. 

“Breath,” he tells himself, swallowing thickly. “Breathe.”

If he can’t get his head right, if he can’t be smart about this, it… well, that’s not even an option. He has to collect himself. He has to live up to the person his parents think he is, his country thinks he is, that you think he is. He has to be that person. He only has a few moments of this realization to reorient himself before he hears Mal’s voice. 

Instead of enticing and distracting like it had been before, now it feels like the lure of an angler fish’s light in the murky depths, it feels jarring. He shudders, recoiling like she just threw glass at him. She calls out for him again. This time, he can hear the spike of fear carried along in her voice as it echoes across the lake. Is she hurt? In trouble? He starts to go check on her, then for a moment, he hesitates.

All the thoughts racing through his mind like the piston cup find their way to the forefront of his head again. His chest aches as he relentlessly beats himself up over this. How could he let this happen? This is exactly what his parents warned him about, what he promised them - gave them his word - that he would not let come to fruition. And yet, here he is, sitting on a rock with the livelihoods of innocent people at risk because of him and his naive, stupid optimism. 

This, the wellbeing of all innocent people of Auradon, is what he’s devoted all of his time and power and care and focus and everything else he’s got within him into. All that work, all that potential for good, and now he lays paralyzed below the sword of Damocles. He can only stand there, watching the ropes fray one after another. 

“I can’t…” he pants, chest squeezing in terror again. “I can’t let this happen.”

He swallows hard, muttering to himself.

“Can’t let them win.”

He can’t let Mal achieve whatever the hell her endgame is here. He has to stop this before it gets worse. And above all, this cannot become known to the public. He can see the faces of disappointment and fear on the members of the council, on the senate. He was never ready to be king, they’d say in hushed, justified tones, the boy is a fool! How could we let him bring evil into our homes on purpose?! 

The voices in his head go on and on, painting the worst outcome possible in vibrant colors. The nation will lose any trust or faith they might have had in him. More painfully, he realizes how deeply disappointed his parents will be in him. The kind so irreparable that they can never even speak of it. His father will go silent, his mother will try to smile at him, but her tears will give her away. Disappointing his parents, disappointing you…

Oh god, you. Where are you? Where have you been during all of this? You and Ben are usually joint at the hip, but he hasn’t seen you in days. The realization makes him feel sick, like he’s just come to the realization that he hasn’t had air to breathe. What have you been doing without him? Have you been in Wonderland, or at the Wonderland Embassy with your mother? Why haven’t you texted him? Or at least called? Worse fears attack him relentlessly from the inside out, worse than ruining innocent lives or his political career because these fears are about you. 

A scream, followed by a large splash, then another more fearful scream pierce his senses, pulling his attention out of the momentary panic over you and your wellbeing. It must be Mal, he thinks, it has to be. She’s the only other person out here. She must have gotten into the water to look for him, but why does she sound like she’s struggling? He listens intently for a moment. She definitely sounds like she’s struggling. He stands up to jump into the water and find her, but before he can, something unusual happens. 

He hesitates.

After everything she’s done to him, and to the people of Auradon, after she stabbed him in the back and violated his free will for days, should he even bother trying to help her? What if this is part of some elaborate ruse, luring him into a trap by pretending to drown. Maybe she’s going to turn him into a bug and trap him in a jar, letting him suffocate slowly while she shakes it and laughs. 

What if she just… had an accident? Anyone could drown in a lake if they weren’t being careful, and he’s sure children of villains aren’t raised to be super cautious. Maybe it would be better that way. It would certainly give Ben one less problem to worry about, one less moving part to constantly keep track of. 

He dives back into the lake, swimming towards her. He bites his cheek, dismissing the fleeting, impulsive thought as quickly as it could intrude into his stream of mind. He’s not even going to waste time considering it or letting it argue his case. He knows who he is, and he knows who he chooses to be. He is never going to choose to be the kind of person who lets someone else get hurt when they can do something about it. 

If he can help anyone - regardless of who they are or what they’ve done to him - he’s going to. Even if it’s from a distance, he can’t knowingly be complicit in tragedy befalling anyone. That’s why he’s bringing over the kids from the Isle in the first place. He can’t sleep at night knowing that there are people struggling and suffering while he has the power to do something about it. 

He has to give his parents credit for raising him to have such strong moral character. That’s why, against his better judgment, he swims as fast as he can back to the pavilion. It only takes a moment for him to see her, kicking and flailing mere feet from the pavilion.

He dives as deep down as he can. He hopes that the longer he’s under the water, the more submerged he is, the less likely any more magic she tries on him will succeed. Or at the very least, she’ll have less time to try and pull something on him. His hand skims the bottom of the lake, brushing against something uncharacteristically sharp. He sees a cluster of glowy crystal like geodes - a wishing stone, he realizes. He grabs it, and shoves the rock into the pocket of his swim trunks. 

It’s not much, it’s barely anything really. But he’s sure any mildly sharp object is infinitely better than nothing when facing off against an unpredictable dark fairy. Trying to use a wishing geode to defend himself from dark fairy magic - either as a magic shield or a physical weapon - is like trying to use an umbrella in a hurricane. He’s really going into this blind, but at least he’s aware of the disadvantage he’s working against. In spite of all the massive errors and failures he seems to have accumulated out of nowhere, he can at least say he’s not stupid enough to be entirely unarmed at a time like this.

He can see Mal, splashing and thrashing about, slipping below the surface as she loses her footing. He rushes closer and grabs her, scooping her up and confidently walking them both out of the lake. He catches his breath, focusing everything he’s got on one thing - he cannot let Mal know that he knows. He has to keep his face neutral, act sweet and normal, not say or do anything that could possibly tip her off. He’s in the lion’s den, and one wrong move could ruin everything beyond repair. 

He silently thanks his parents for years and years of diplomatic training, for teaching him how to maintain his composure no matter how overwhelming his emotions are, no matter how much pressure and scrutiny he finds himself under. He reaches the pavilion in just a few steps, and sets Mal down gently. She doesn’t seem to notice anything about his behavior is different, so he keeps doing what he’s been doing. It seems to be working so far, which provides him with the briefest sense of relief. 

“Ugh!” She shrieks. He shakes the water out of his hair, trying to clear his head, and she swats at his chest, “You scared me!”

Ben falters for a moment, nearly letting a grimace loose at the nauseating feeling of disgust permeating him from this, from having to be so close and sweet to her after she violated his mind, his free will. And she did it on purpose. 

“Uh,” he starts, trying with everything he’s got to sound so light and casual, like she made him sound before. “You… you can’t swim?” 

It’s really not that important to either of them right now, but it’s the first thing he can think of that doesn’t start with why the hell or how the hell or jail. 

“No!” She yells indignantly, like it should be obvious. 

“But you live on an island.” He notes. He never would have been able to challenge her under the curse she cast on him, not even something as small as asking why she can’t swim. He watches her expression closely, wondering if she’ll notice.

“Yeah, with a magic barrier around it, remember?” She demands incredulously. There’s a shrill tone to her voice with a venomous sting, like Ben was the one who cast her out and put up the barrier himself. He flinches at the sound of her voice.

She can’t swim. She nearly drowned looking for him, and he let himself consider allowing it to happen. A stab of unwelcome but justified guilt catches him off guard for a moment, causing him to falter. 

“And… you still tried to save me.” He murmurs solemnly, mostly to himself. 

He hates this. He hates that she did something so horrible and so kind to him right after each other. It’s tempting to dismiss her searching for him in the lake, to let himself focus only on the pain and damage she’s caused in such a short time, and he tries desperately to cling to his moral values. Values that he’s always sworn to himself he will never abandon, no matter how hard or complicated things get.

Now here he stands, looking hard and complicated square in the purple framed face. 

People are nuanced, he tells himself, trying to remember it. Nobody is all good or all bad. People… people are complicated. It’s a hard philosophy to hold onto, and an even harder one when you’re the one that’s been made a fool of, made to dance around in public and cater to her every whim. It’s hard to remember that people are nuanced, not all bad when you’ve been made into someone’s bitch. 

“Yeah, and do you thank me?” Mal demands rhetorically, “No!”

He struggles to follow her. Her voice makes him flinch, buzzing around his head like an angry hornets nest. It makes his ears ring. He feels that strange, painful headache stirring up again - the one that got worse and worse every time she forced her voice into his mind. 

“All I get is soaking wet!” 

She looks at him expectantly, then huffs. It sounds exactly like the noise Audrey would make when she wanted something that wasn’t handed to her instantly. A new wave of indignant rage begins to bubble and boil up inside him as he realizes what she wants. She wants him to grovel. She wants him to apologize, and kiss her hands, and beg for everything to be smoothed right over. He swallows hard, managing to contain it. Just barely.

In a split second, he realizes he has to do something. The more time they spend together, the sooner Mal will realize she doesn’t have control over him again. If she finds out, that will open up more trouble than Ben would care to count. He has to pacify her, just enough to get them both home as fast as possible. Before she can do anything else to him. 

He reaches into his pocket, handing her the geode. 

“And this, uh… this fancy rock.” 

His stomach twists, spiking with anxiety as he offers it to her. Wishing stones - also called wish geodes - are a natural and common byproduct of fairy magic. They can vary in strength and appearance based on what fairy they came from, and since they usually form underground or by bodies of water, they can be hard to find. They’ve become even harder to source in recent years as less and less people use magic - fairies included. 

The ones near Auradon are from Fairy Godmother’s magic. The ones way up north in Schwartzvald are from the mainland forest fairies deep in the Fantasia Woods, the ones out west are from the Blue Fairy, and any wish geode you find on the northeastern coast will always be from Flora, Fauna, or Merriweather. Since wish geodes are essentially nature’s way of recycling magic leftovers, they’re usually not too strong. Unless they were charged up with something, like a blessing, or a falling star, or enchanted spring water from Olympus. 

Ben, however, is painfully unaware of this. He hasn’t studied magic and magic theory as extensively as you have. He suspects sometimes that you may know more about magic than the good fairy herself. He does know some introductory magic theory, and a few little facts from you that he’s remembered over the years. 

What he does know is that wishes and hypnosis or mind control or whatever the hell Mal did to him are two completely different kinds of magic. He knows that if he gives Mal the stone, even if she did wish for something, it couldn’t possibly do more damage than she’s already done. At this point, it’s the lesser of two evils. Really, it’s the only viable option he’s got. The geode shimmers and glitters, glowing softly against her skin in a luminous pearly hue. She glares up at him, and he plasters on a smile. Hopefully, a convincing one. He gestures back behind him. 

“Make a wish, and throw it back in the lake.”

Unless her goal of hypnotizing him was to somehow end up with a good grade on the next test, or a really good hair day, this rock will do nothing for her. It’s just not strong enough on its own, which makes it the perfect placebo. Mal scowles up at him, and winds up to throw the rock bitterly into the lake. 

In that moment, her heart’s unsung desires cry out desperately, begging for something that not even her mind can grasp. I wish what he said was true, her heart cries, that he doesn’t think I’m evil. I wish Ben would keep being nice to me, even after I break the spell. I wish Ben would defend me from all the people who act like they’re afraid of me, I wish he would make me feel like I belong here!

The rock sinks into the water, bubbling and glowing as her desires are realized. A soft whispered voice floats into the air, seeming to speak only to her.

“Malorie Valda Faery, Princess of the Moors and Young mistress of Evil… your wish has been heard, and your wish has been granted. So long as you do not act on the evil inside your heart, and stay trustworthy, honest, and kind, he shall see no evil inside you.” 

It’s so faint, so hard to hear that she thinks she must have imagined it. She falters, thrown off guard for a moment, then stands up and shakes off some of the water still clinging to her. The glowing water swirls and pools around Ben. An almost ticklish, tingling feeling floats down onto him. It’s so light and so soft, it’s gone so quickly that he struggles to remember if it really happened.

He takes in a breath, his brow softening as he realizes the panic is retreating. A breeze blows by, carrying the scent of magnolia and the impending night air that quickly makes its way closer to them as the sun sinks. Little goosebumps prickle down Ben’s arms and back as his defenses begin to relax back to normal. He picks up his varsity jacket to wrap around Mal, and grabs a towel for himself. The last thing either of them need right now is to catch a cold. 

He takes a few more breaths as she sits down, mildly puzzled at why it’s so easy to breathe now, but so difficult just a few moments before. He searches every crease and crevice of his mind for what was bothering him before. He doesn’t usually struggle to remember what he was thinking about, but this particular thing just seems to evade him, like a child playing hide and seek. He knows it was important, really important, but he just… can’t remember. He looks down at Mal in hopes of jogging his memory, but seeing her sit there, all sad and wet and swallowed up by his jacket, all he feels is a pang of sympathy. 

He feels himself relaxing, his reflexes softening from a state of panic to their usual level of low, constant background anxiety. Look at her, he thinks, does she really look like she wants to overthrow an entire country? The question is rhetorical, and the answer clear. No. She just wants a home, somewhere to fit in. She looks so small, so vulnerable and powerless like this. He chastises himself for letting himself lose sight of why he brought her and her friends to Auradon in the first place.

She’s here to grow, to heal - they all are. Of course she’s going to make some silly mistakes like spray painting her locker, or cutting class, or using magic to get Ben to go out with her. Besides, with coronation coming up so fast, it makes sense that she would feel like she couldn’t find an opportunity to ask Ben out without a little extra help. That’s all this is, a silly mistake. It’s nothing to be blown out of proportion, really. He sighs, sitting across from her, feeling a dull nudge of something that could grow into fondness with time.

He reaches over to fix her hair, and she looks up at him. She searches his eyes, desperately looking for any signs of hate or change in how he views her. That’s what this is, he confirms to himself. She just has a crush on him is all. He would never say that to anyone, he wouldn’t run the risk of embarrassing someone dealing with such delicate feelings, but it does make sense. She said herself just a while ago, dating on the Isle is more like gang activity than picnics and drive in movies. Of course she wouldn’t know how to talk to someone she likes, how to find ways to spend more time with them. 

Ben almost chuckles at the thought, the idea of her trying to figure out how to enchant her crush into liking her back. It’s sweet, really. Nothing malicious at all. Besides, everybody knows that love magic doesn’t exist, there is no such thing as a love spell. So if she still doesn’t know that yet, could her knowledge of magic really be that dangerous? It can’t possibly be. She just used a harmless little spell to speed things up a little. No one would ever act out like that if it wasn’t for some matter of the heart or other. It’s almost flattering in a strange way.

He decides to test his theory, letting his fingertips linger in her damp, sugar plum hair, twirling it lightly.

“Mal?” He starts, getting her attention. 

“I, uh… I told you that I loved you. At the tourney game.” He says, jogging her memory. He looks at her, studying her face. “What about you?”

This is perfect, he thinks, this is the most opportune way to offer her a way to tell him how she feels, get it all off her chest. 

“Do you love me?” He prompts.

Normally, he would never be this direct with someone. But he feels it’s warranted, given the circumstances. It’s taken many years for him to learn to trust his gut with things like this, and he’s not going to doubt himself now. Yes, what she did was bad - unforgivable, even - but at the end of the day, she’s just a hormonal teenage girl with a crush. She can’t possibly be faulted for that, for having feelings. 

“I…” Mal starts, swallowing thickly and looking away from him again. She clutches the sides of his jacket, pulling it tighter around her. It smells soapy, like it’s too clean. She knows she should probably be feeling something, but she has no goddamn clue what it is - much less how to recognize and articulate it. She feels… queasy. Kind of shaky and sweaty. Are you supposed to feel like that when a boy says I love you? That has to be the feeling that people are always talking about, getting butterflies in your stomach. Mal supposes butterflies just don’t agree with her. 

“I don’t think I know what love feels like.” She replies simply, in a rare and impulsive moment of vulnerability. If she’s ever going to be vulnerable, it will be when she can control how the other person reacts to it. She looks down. Instead of looking at Ben, she traces her eyes over the skirt of the dress Evie put her in. It’s calming, relaxing. There’s the faintest trace of Evie’s perfume, and it makes Mal feel a sense of warmth and longing that she desperately needs right now. 

Ben’s heart squeezes sympathetically. He feels so bad for her. That tragic compassion reassures him that bringing her to Auradon was the right decision, and this whole thing was just a silly miscommunication. A mistake. 

“Maybe I could teach you.” He says softly. He puts his hand on her arm, helping her stand up.

“Come on. Let’s get you home.”

When you show up to the Wonderland Embassy, the home away from home you share with your mother, you look positively and uncharacteristically ragged. It’s merely a pebble’s throw from campus, so it couldn’t have been a particularly tiring walk - unless you walked your way from Camelot, which is highly improbable. Your blackberry bow is loose and slipping off towards your ear, your skirt is all rumpled, and you haven’t even noticed the run in your favorite pair of knee socks. 

Worst of all, worse than your slouching or lethargy or the tear tracks down your cheeks, are your eyes. The vibrancy, the hope and curiosity is all but gone. Your dear mother, Alice - better known as Alice Liddel, Ambassador of Wonderland - notices all of this right away. You answer her usual question, are you ready to embark on your weekly mother daughter dinner, before she can even ask it. 

“I’m afraid I can’t make dinner, mother,” you say, babbling around the tea biscuit you grab from the counter and hold in your mouth, keeping your hands free to drop off the useless information you’ve gathered throughout the day and search for a few books in your mother’s collection. 

“But I promise I’ll get something more than tea and cakes from the school kitchens tonight.” You assure her half heartedly, more worried about her peace of mind than your dietary habits. The moment the words leave your lips, she knows that something is wrong. Not wrong in the sort of way that a leaf floats down a brook, but deeply wrong, like a subaquatic shrub. 

Shrubs are not subaquatic by nature, and if one is found it’s recommended to bring it to the nearest tree surgeon as quickly as possible. She looks at you, her darling daughter, her wonderful little dear, and sees a subaquatic rose garden. You never skip dinners with your mother, not for the tiffletoo flu, or final exams, or anything else regardless of urgency or importance. The only time you’ve skipped dinner in the past was one time, one terrible night where Ben was rushed off the tourney field with a broken wrist and a nasty concussion. 

The standard for skipping dinner and tea with your mother is one that’s very rare and quite  extreme, so you’re not too terribly surprised when she stops you from leaving the Wonderland Embassy with a gentle hand on your shoulder. 

“Nunz yet, my love,” She says softly, soothingly. She fixes your hair in that comforting motherly way of hers, then moves on to fix your bow how you like it. 

“I can’t watch you gyre like an overwrought sulphide marble for a moment longer.” She looks at you softly. “What’s got your mind so snaggled, sweets?”

Your mother, your dear dear mother is your most favorite person in both worlds, right alongside Ben. You’ve always found your inability to lie to her or hide your feelings as a relief, a blessing. Now, however, you find yourself wishing for the first time that you were able to lie to her as easily as Audrey and Lonnie lie to their mothers. Your stomach twists uncomfortably. You don’t like this feeling. You wish it would just go away, but you know you can’t tell your mother everything that’s going on. Not yet, at least. 

She’s so close with Ben’s parents - in both business and personal regards - that if you were to make the wrong move, it could mean a world of nasty repercussions and consequences for Ben. The exact ones you’ve been maddening yourself trying to shield him from. You trust your mother implicitly, but you also know she has a duty - not just as a politician, but as a parent - to inform Ben’s parents imminently of any perils regarding Ben that she is made aware of. 

You sit down, fussing with the pleats of your dress, tugging at your stockings to buy yourself some time, give yourself a moment to carefully choose the most right, non incriminating words you can muster up.

“Ben has been behaving strangely.” You state. Your voice is soft, but not fragile. This worries your mother. If your voice were fragile, you see, it would mean this was all very new and fresh. But the reluctant acceptance in your tone of voice tells her the severity of the situation in which you’ve found both yourself and Ben. Your voice is quiet, your words simple, and a soft hum of understanding leaves your mother’s lips. She nods empathically, silent in the moment that follows so you can continue. 

“And, I… can’t quite seem to figure out the reason why.” You continue, even more quietly - almost shamefully so.

Your mother hums again, this time with a deeper, more resolute understanding of how you’re feeling and why exactly you must be feeling the way that you are. You and Ben have been so terribly close for so awfully long, that if either of you had felt at any point during your numerous years of friendship that you were mildly confused by the behavior or the other - much less left clueless and in the dark, as you currently are - that that in and of itself would be nothing short of anomalous. 

So naturally, when something this catastrophically unusual occurs, it should come as no shock at all how deeply distressing it would be to you. The very worst part, you realize, is that your mother has already come to this conclusion with barely a fraction of the information you have. You shudder to think about how distraught she’d be on your behalf if she knew everything you do about your trouble with Ben’s unusualness as of late.

“Lovey…” Your mother says warmly. She reaches over to you, handing you a warm porcelain teacup and saucer of her ever perfect chamomile tea. It’s sweetened with just the right amount of honey, but not so much as to overpower it - a mistake that you’ve seen many people make quite often - and topped off with just a little bit of shaken cream and rose pollen.

You’re never sure how she manages to make it so perfectly with so little effort every single time, but it must be a mother’s touch, you suppose. A gentle hug and a warm cup of her specialty tea always gets you to open right up to your mother, no matter how mimsy and gallymoggers you may be feeling. 

Your expression drops, and your mother recognizes it instantly as the look of finally allowing yourself to let in the very best of ideas. Your posture straightens imperceptibly, and your mother disguises her proud smile with a sip from her own teacup. She loves seeing you like this, lighting up as your mind is flooded in a flash brainstorm. 

“That’s it…” you mutter again, aloud this time. You stand up, careful not to spill your beverage, and you take a great big sip before setting it down hastily. 

“Thank you,” you sigh gratefully to your mother, giving her a squeeze around the middle, and a honey chamomile kiss to the cheek before you depart. 

“I really must go now,” you say regrettably, but she’s already waving you off with affection. 

“Be safe, dear.” She smiles, then gives you a subtle and humorous look. “And don’t lose your head.”

You let out a laugh from your nose. 

“I think you’ve come close enough for the both of us.”

You exit the Embassy in a rush, determination and your mother’s laughter following in your footsteps. For the first time in days, you know what to do next.

[missplayer30]

I just like the idea of SpongeBob, Patrick, Sandy, Squidward and Mindy being some sort of youngish adult gang. I want to imagine them as teens (or youngish adult in Squid's case), aka what they look like in the Patrick Star show.

This is just a random situation without context when I first drew this.

In my mind, I envision the spinoff version of Mindy being a very young, awkward and nerdy looking teen, who also wears brace. I'll be writing more on her eventually. (Please, do NOT bring up her "real" age, because that was actually a huge misinformation based on an old comment, which was the same one when the guy brought up that he sees Patrick as a literal kid, that was later taken as "fact" by pretty much anyone who never did research over it, if anything, she would be closer to SpongeBob and Patrick's age, whatever their age are)

I used my Sandy redesign of the spinoff instead of her actual one, so expect me to use her over the official one whenever there is a Patrick Star show related art.

[nicollekidman]

What would your ideal challengers fic contain?

okay i’ve been thinking about this for ages bc i don’t typically have a thirst for fic of movies and esp not ones that are good but some fun ideas

tashiart phantom thread (she poisons him)

patrick telling tashi and art how to fuck each other (it sucks and is good for all three of them)

some sort of acknowledgment that there’s a kid in the picture now

tashi crying. please. probably something related to the mutual injuries that have both healed and not healed

obviously tashi deserves her full on yaoi moment but that’s less personally compelling to me….. i need her involved bc she’s the star

both of them watching just art.

tashi superstar roleplay

[peachviz]

I finally finished Voyager so you know what that means.

It’s a Voyager Wrap Up and notes party:

(Beware: hot takes ahead)

- I like and I hate this show. It was my slowest watch. I should have probably started with this instead of DS9 bc as you all know nothing can top DS9 and when you start out with the best meal nothing can compare. But tbh I don’t know if it would have made a difference.

- There’s a problem with this show that I’ve noticed that it’s a common problem within Star Trek as a whole. This one was just noticeable. There’s parts where they build up plots and characters and then half way through they just give up.

Kes was the biggest atrocity, they couldn’t figure out what to do with her so they give up on her and replace her with a new shiny toy. Won’t even get into the misogyny of the situation, we are all aware I don’t have to keep beating a dead horse. (Also aware of the hostile situation on set I’m not interested in that debate)

Chakotay is another example. He starts to lose lines and he kind of just floats. Tuvok is another big one. Because why tf did I have to sit through more Neelix focused episodes than Tuvok???????

Like the writers constantly do this but it’s so noticeable with this series. It’s like Patrick trying to open Sandy Cheeks’s door in SpongeBob and he just holds his hands over the door and goes, “Open Seasme!” The door doesn’t open and he shrugs and goes “Well, I’ve done all I can do.” That’s the writers of this show.

- while on the topic of Neelix. Here’s a hot take. What an incredibly pointless and annoying character. He made a lot of episodes unwatchable. Kes and Neelix have to be the worst poison I’ve ever ingested from Star Trek as a whole and I had to sit through TNG sexism and somehow this pairing was the worst. How incels feel about JarJar Binks is how I feel about Neelix. If you like him, great. If you don’t like him, let’s hug.

- there is something about this show that I feel they do better than DS9 and that is mental health episodes. It’s so subtle and there doesn’t have to be a lot of theatrics. While DS9 is good at portrayal, there are things that Voyager does with the Doctor, Seven, and even B’Elanna that I found the most relatable

- which btw B’Elanna is like super relatable it’s almost scary. I love Kira Nerys, she’s still my all time favorite, but I find myself gravitating to being like B’Elanna. I feel like she had the best character development besides Seven. Now granted, she can do some really selfish fucked up shit. Like the Doctor’s holofamily, etc, but I find her character refreshing. This show needed that.

- Seven of Nine. Idk what to say to make everything fit so here’s a lightning round. The cat suit is fucking annoying. We had to have Gene Roddenberry dying to get Deanna Troi in a real uniform and then we have the goodness of DS9 just to have the men be like “we need to bring back sexy” and then bring this wonderful character just to keep her in a cat suit. A suit, btw, that she doesn’t even want to be in bc in all her holo fantasies she’s either in a uniform, pants, or literally anything else. And don’t even get me started on Chakotay and Seven. What an odd paring with zero chemistry. It felt almost fatherly and then that shit happens bc they had to dispel the J/C shit and I think it was along the lines of Beltran getting tired of Chakotay being a “chump”. ??? Idk if that’s the exact quote but like boooooo that’s boring. It’s just ew no thanks.

- but seven is a wonderful character and if there weren’t so many men in the writing room then we could have had it all. Looking forward to seeing what Picard retcons

- Janeway is an amazing captain and I’m glad we have a complicated female captain but this goes along with my first topic. For the first four seasons, until she cuts her hair, there’s still too many cooks in the kitchen. You have her naked somehow multiple episodes per season until 4 (?) and then she has that dumbass governess holo program. Like by the time she has her hair cut, we could have just had all that from the start. Everyone say thank you Kate Mulgrew

- lastly, I’m glad that J/C didn’t become canon while they were away bc sometimes yearning is hotter than having. Kate Mulgrew stating that it was inappropriate for an office place romance bc young girls shouldn’t have to see (once again generalizing a quote) is totally valid. And tbh I feel like it would be a distraction to Janeway specifically

Idk in closing it’s an alright watch. It wasn’t really spectacular to me anyway. There were a lot of good parts, but I feel like it lost steam midway through season 6 and a lot of it was rocky. I could just be getting Star Trek fatigue.

Picard is next and then Prodigy. Probably won’t even go near Enterprise and I’ll be doing an actual rewatch of discovery to finish it. And another rewatch of lower decks bc now I’ll be able to understand it in total. So the Rankings below will exclude prodigy, ent, Picard, and discovery.

Current Series Ranking:

1) Deep Space Nine

2) Strange New Worlds

3) The Original Series

4) Lower Decks

5) Voyager

6) The Next Generation

Current Captain Ranking:

1) Sisko

2) Janeway

3) Pike

4) Kirk

5) Picard

6) Freeman

Anyway, I have two voyager edits to get off the ground and my notes app looks like the Bible so getting this footage is going to be super time consuming.

Now onto Picard

[nerdieforpedro]

WIP Thursday

I’ll combine this with two snippets from fics I’m thinking of putting on Tumblr, one day. lol 🥰 I've been a bit slow with responding to things but you're welcome to keep sending them. I will get to them within the week.

I was tagged by: @fhatbhabiee @secretelephanttattoo @lotusbxtch @604to647 @inept-the-magnificent

The titles of the fics I'm actually working on:

Everything is New

Fire and Fury

This is the Neighborhood Din

That Green Shop

Uncomplicated Mi Amor

Our Journey Across the Star Ocean

Weddings 101 with Dieter

Living with Benny

Therapy for the Well-Adjusted

Caught in the Magic of You

Two Hearts by the Ocean

I think that most of these titles I've mentioned before or are ongoing. And I'm working on some asks I got about the last WIP. 👀 So slow.

Snippet One:

Patrick was taking his sweet time getting off the ground and Teresa was beginning to yell at Marcus, telling him that she’d have his badge for harming her Patrick.  Marcus Pike had enough. He requested to not have them in this case, asked to be reassigned, and has kept interactions to a minimum. He didn’t ask Patrick to chase a suspect. He’s a consultant. He’s not supposed to be doing it anyway!

What happened to Patrick? Why is does Teresa think Marcus has harmed him? What has Marcus had enough of? Is the above gif him laughing before things hit the fan? Who knows? (I mean I do, but I gotta bring a little drama. 🤭 Tee hee.)

Snippet Two:

Pero set Calista down at the mouth of the cave, sitting down next to her. She was enchantingly beautiful, now that she wasn’t berating him or stomping on him. He wondered if it was the strain of everything that had her collapse like that with blood. He needed to inquire about the few things he had noticed about himself. The enhanced vision, the slight chill he feels through his body, why her body felt like nothing in his arms and so much more. Some he’s not quite able to put words to yet. Until she wakes, he’s content with the fact that he hasn’t sloughed off his mortal coil yet. He wonders what’s become of William and his horse before hearing the cracking of a branch and a large step. Much too large for a human or animal. It could be a monster, demon or worst case - the white dragon. Turns out Pero was right on one count, it was a dragon, but silver. Its scales reflected the sun and overloaded his eyes, he had to close them. When he opened them, a woman stood before him with skin that was reminiscent of mahogany. Glitters of silver dotted her skin and her hair was silver with streaks of mint green, similar to Calista. Is this dragon related to her? Pero had a hand on his sword just in case. 

I'm working on a Pero Tovar, enemies to lovers fantasy story with dragons. Just because. 😌 Again Tee tee.

NPT: @maggiemayhemnj @mysterious-moonstruck-musings @megamindsecretlair @soft-persephone @chaithetics

@connectioneverywhere @tinytinymenace @laurfilijames @rulexofxnines @soft-girl-musings

@rhoorl @paulmescal-s @djarins-cyare @djarinmuse @rosecentaur1916

[yukine-sakamoto]

More Shadows House: I’m near the end of the debut arc (ep. 7, 8, & 9). I suppose I should start tagging these for spoilers so: spoilers

I’m loving how Emilico helping everyone comes back to her in so many different ways, and how it disarms everyone and allows them to help and be helped as well. Honestly makes me feel a little bad for ever assuming the worst of someone. I’m glad we saw John panic over what he said to Kate, too. It was adorable and grounds his character, plus he did go a bit too far. We basically get confirmation that all shadows have soot powers but with different strengths, and that does seem to be part of the test. It was also interesting to see the interaction between shadows of different rankings. The third floor crew basically treat the other shadows as servants, not quite to the degree of living dolls but more than I would have expected. I suppose they need servants since their living dolls are… consumed, I guess. I did not expect that reveal at all. Kind of throws most of my theory out the window (unsurprisingly), but I still wonder what they do with all the soot, especially since it relates to negative feelings.

I definitely underestimated Rum. I mean I was rooting for her, but I’m so glad Emilico was able to support her and give her a little self-confidence, so she could really show her strengths. The moments of her figuring out the map and the maze and being reassured about Shirley, so good. More than that though, I think I underestimated Shirley. I had assumed she was shy like Rum, and that we never saw her produce soot because she was used to being on the sidelines. But knowing that Rum has never seen her make soot at all and that her room is always spotless makes me think there’s a lot under the surface. Even someone with weak soot powers would normally give off a little when they feel negative. Shirley must be content and likely confident/above-it-all in order to never make soot. I bet she’s super smart like Rum. She knows something the others don’t, or has figured something out. She’d rather observe and learn more than engage in posturing for the competition. (Also, very into the theory I saw that Shirley somehow created Rummy through soot powers, and has been talking to Rum this whole time.)

I really wish we heard what was said between each pair when Rum rescued Shirley and when Ricky rescued Patrick. It would’ve been very revealing for each of their characters, but especially since we haven’t heard a word from Shirley yet. I’m guessing they’ll show Rum/Shirley later though.

I’m glad they had the third floor crew talk about how strange this test is and how biased Edward clearly is. It’s a lot of what I was talking about in my last post, so it was satisfying. Still, they seem content to just be entertained and not worry to much about the validity of the test, which is expected but disappointing. Actually, they seem really eager to see someone, anyone fail and die. I think they probably care very little about the event as a test and focus on the spectacle. It was interesting to hear I think Ryan say something like “do we want a bunch of star bearers?” I was confused initially because I thought that was a title of honor and authority, but it was said with distain. It was during the conversation about dolls and individuality, though, and I saw someone guess that star bearers are shadow & doll pairs that can’t or won’t merge, which makes a lot of sense to me. I think due to Emilico’s influence none of this cohort will be willing to merge. They are all learning to be kinder and less competitive, which breaks down the walls separating master and servant. Certainly Kate and John wouldn’t. Louise might since she is clearly obsessed with Lou, but depending on their relationship she might actually prefer Lou to have a body.

But that being said I have to talk about Kate’s & Shirley’s prisons. There’s literally no way to properly free Kate except one random chance at the beginning. That’s not a test, it’s an execution. I mean I’m mad about the injustice of it, but it also would’ve been less of a show for third floor crew if things had gone to plan. I wish we had seen more about the intended solutions to the other prisons, too. Louise’s literally had instructions on it, clear bias and very stupid. John destroyed his, but I imagine it was similar to Patrick’s, which was very interesting to me. They kind of glossed over it, but I don’t think we’ve seen soot used that way before. I had assumed it would not be able to hold a shape on its own, or if it could, it would be too brittle to turn a lock. For Shirley’s, they explained how the soot mechanism that would kill her worked, but never said there was any kind of key or other mechanism. Kate was last in the ranking when this part started, so by Edward’s logic Shirley’s should be slightly easier than Kate’s. I think cutting through the plants was the only way, maybe that’s what the shears at the beginning were intended for.

Speaking of Louise and shears. I never thought Ricky had it in him to hurt Lou or Louise, and I mean that as a compliment, but I also don’t think he had a right to get mad at Shawn since he did think about it and it would be in line with his behavior thus far. Then again, being mad about it is also very in character for him. It was nice to see Lou show some initiative and give him the shears. (And very clever noticing the differences in the masters’ soot trails) I’m not necessarily on board with the little romance they seem to be teasing between the two though. There’s clearly something going on with Lou that needs to be addressed first. She’s growing, but she still seems like not all there at times, and it’s worrying.

Also John is a badass just punching that boulder to pieces. Is it bad that I was kind of into how excited Sophie got over “the volume of his soot”? *blush* Anyway, I’m always slightly frustrated by these boulder chase scenes because I feel like you could just lie flat in the corner and the boulder would pass over you. Or, he could hide in the turnstile. It’s metal, so part of me doubts the boulder would do more than dent it. Actually that whole exchange was silly. Once both pins are lifted, it looks like they won’t lock again until a full 180° turn. You could open it once and just pass back and forth freely without ever letting it lock again. I don’t know, maybe there’s more to the mechanism.

Also, back to Kate’s prison and the rescue. Kate and Emilico’s reunion conversation was so cute and yes wasted a bit of time but technically maybe worth it to calm down Kate and slow the soot mechanism. I did have trouble suspending my disbelief for the rescue sequence though. Emilico was very valiant running along the beam and jumping to save Kate, but the physics just don’t make sense to me. How could she leap forward over the lip, but somehow reach back far enough to grab Kate? And if the flower cart was there, did she need to catch Kate? I mean the flower cart felt a little convenient on its own, like, Emilico did not look before she leapt. But more than that, and it was hard to tell, but in certain shots the cage looked like it was over grass. It was definitely close to the edge, and it only looked about one story up. That’s a survivable fall. You couldn’t catch yourself if you fell with the cage, but if you hung on, as Kate did, you could just swing forward, land on the soft grass, and like tuck and roll. Very survivable. Still it was cute for them to land in the flowers together. Criminal that Emilico’s nickname was translated as sunshine instead of flower bed. So many good references to that name are missed.

Can’t wait to see how it all turns out.

(Also thank you to the person who reblogged my last one of these and said they wanted more. I don’t know if you’ll see this, but I’m new here, so that made my day.)

[spongebob-connoisseur]

Kamp Koral season 2 will drop today! I can't wait <3

I know I've said before that I didn't care for kamp koral but it really grew on me over the past two weeks. That's probably because I've been watching the 2nd half of season 1 of the show. I procrastinated on it for so long because I said I'd watch it when I get it on dvd. Even after I got it on dvd, I was more interested in rewatching the Patrick Star Show.

Anyways I admit I like it. I think it's because season 14 of Spongebob has been really lackluster thus far. I never thought I'd miss Spongebob and Sandy being actual characters. Sponge just doesn't feel like an actual character as of late. He feels like a background character in his own show. As for Sandy, Bubblebass currently has more screentime in the main show than Sandy WHICH IS CRAZY

I've been fine dining on Slappy content for the past few years and I adore him as a character but it's also to cover up my slow growing disinterest in the main show. It started with the latter half of season 13 but I think now it's more of an issue with season 14. I don't think I've really enjoyed a season 14 episode outside of Tango Tangle (not just because of Slappy. It was nice to see Plankton WIN for once. Also Karen is adorable)

I know people enjoyed Bassward but I just can't stand Bubblebass as of late. The food thing™ with him grosses me out. I know Spongebob often has characters eating in excess in a cartoonish way but Bubblebass manages to actually disgust me which is. Crazy because I love SB and its excessive gross out. I can't stand the details of it with Bubblebass. Stahp it dawg. To think there was a time where I was happy that Bubblebass was going to be used more in the modern seasons.

There is also the absolute fumble of Necro-nom-nom-nom-icon. I was REALLY looking forward to this episode only to be disappointed. It such a good episode idea!  The actual book of the dead and necromancy ending up in Spongebob's hands?? This could've been Night Patty 2.0 but more insane!  How does such a good concept fall so flat?

Sometimes I feel like the crew took the complaints of the show being ""too expressive"" and tried to tone it down but didn't really try to fill the gaps with any gags or interesting story. I'm getting off topic here though.

Kamp Koral was pleasant to watch, knowing the end is right around the corner is kinda sad (patrick show supremacy!!!) The show still does feel limited because the characters are children and there's only so much you can do with them but at least they ARE characters. It's so so nice to see Squidward SMILE once in a while.

I had fun watching it, it's not like it's a masterpiece or anything but it got some laughs out of me. Plus the 2nd half of the first season has better graphics overall.

 You probably already know I love the Trawler cabin characters. @froskii teased that I only liked it for Kidferatu which isn't true. I do think it is funny that there's a child carbon copy of Nosferatu running around with no explaination but he isn't really the focus.

I think if you made a regular non-spongebob related cartoon with monster characters then I'd watch it (which I'm actually doing right now with some childhood favorite cartoons)  My favorite character amongst the Trawlers is Preda Tory, she's a sea spider and the true star amongst the Trawlers. There's actually a leaked image of her adult design for the upcoming episode Kreep Away Kamp. It's sO GOOD.

I was going to say Narlene isn't that bad in Kamp Koral, until I saw the episode "The Taste of Defeat".

THIS TITLE CARD ALONE IS FOUL I RETRACT ALL POSITIVE OPINIONS

Anyways episodes I did enjoy thus far includes 

Hats Off To Space - side quests in space

The Perfect Camper - Trawlers create some Frankenstein abomination to win the camp games for them

Scaredy Squirrel - Sandy is being racist (speciest?) towards the weird kids

Painting With Squidward - Squishwart wants to win a painting contest. Sandy invents AI art

Revelie Revolution - Squishwart beefing with the anchovies.

Camp Crossbones - Sponge and friends become pirates.

Deep Sea Despot - Squishwart establishes a dictatorship when left in charge

Lake Crashers - if demolition doofus was done right

Camp Spirit - Sponge and friends befriend a ghost <3

Boo Light Special - there has never been a bad episode with Dutchy. I don't need to elaborate further.

There's definitely more but these are what I remember off the top of my head.

So yeah, I'm highly anticipating the new episodes and I would love to hear your thoughts this too <33

[jesternene]

The Women of Star Trek: Picard

It is that time of year and the Emmy buzz is loud and proud among the different outlets promoting certain shows and actors that made an impact during their season. I agree with a lot of the articles that I have seen. However, there is one thing that is missing in their spotlight: The women.

As a Star Trek fan, the hype of the Final Season of Star Trek: Picard not only succeeded in their approach but they went above and beyond. The nice mix of new and nostalgia to the story was blended well and it deserves “Outstanding Drama Series” in the upcoming Emmys. The problem that I am having is not what we saw in the Season but how the Women of the series seem to be missing in that hype Star Trek: Picard is getting.

I agree that Patrick Stewart, Jonathan Frakes, Levar Burton, and Michael Dorn were fantastic this season and do deserve to be recognized for their new approach to their characters, but the women were just as equally if not more deserving because the story mostly revolved around them.

Let’s start with Jeri Ryan. The beginning of Seven’s story started with controversy due to how they approached her character during her time in Star Trek: Voyager. As much as fans wanted to see the former Next Gen characters when Picard was announced, it was nice to see another character outside of that particular show, as all the characters in the Star Trek universe are important to the story. Seeing Seven as a rogue Fenris Ranger, going outside the law to do the greater good, was fantastic. It showed a different side to the character and the way Jeri approached that character was a breath of fresh air to those who adored her on Voyager. With the series ending, It was nice seeing the conflict with Seven on wanting to do the greater good but being stuck with regulations. Her performance in showing Seven’s struggle was brilliantly done. We knew why she did what she did and didn’t question her one bit. That was based on how Jeri approached it and seeing now Captain Seven, and wanting more of Captain Seven, is all to Jeri’s credit.

Michelle Hurd was new to the franchise but you never would have known. Her character Raffi worked so well with Picard, that you forgot she was never around during the TNG days. You bought that she had a history with Picard, even if we didn’t see it. The emotional turmoil her character went through brought Star Trek to a new level and it was character development that fans longed for. I give that credit to Michelle's approach to that. She embodied the struggle that Raffi was going through. The emotional roller coaster we saw was not only entertaining on so many levels, but it invoked emotional and tear-jerking scenes that the fans could feel and understand. When fans can relate to a character, you know the actor and the writer are doing their job.

Of course, fans not only wanted to see past and new characters in the franchise, but we wanted great stories as well. During the TNG days, some stories fell flat as they didn’t bring the characters to the level that the fans felt they should have. What was interesting about the final season of Star Trek: Picard is the writers decided to not only take that extra step but put the characters through those emotional scenes that the fans waited 35 years for. Gates McFadden was a fan favorite to return and she did not disappoint with those types of scenes.

Giving her character a complete 180 backstory, allowed Gates to showcase just how great an actress she is. With over 40+ years under her belt, Gates brought everything she had ever done in her career and embodied it in the character of Dr. Beverly Crusher. A character that she holds dear to her heart, she wanted to make sure that the fans understood the love and heartbreak of Beverly. She had scenes that required no words but it tugged on the heartstrings of the viewer that we wanted to see more. Her chemistry with Patrick Stewart only highlighted his scenes for the better. Ed Speelers, who plays her son Jack Crusher, mixed well with how Gates approached this side of Beverly and it was the Mother Son scenes that fans longed for. This season not only went down as one of the best in the Star Trek Franchise but for Gates as well. The emotion she played, minor details of a chin quiver, or even a small smile, really brought out why Beverly Crusher is the fan's character. They can relate to her on so many levels and it is that acting that deserves to be recognized among her fellow peers and the industry.

And let's not forget, more powerhouse women showcased their chops in every scene they were given. Amanda Plummer as the new villain, Vadic, made fans delight in her sarcastic demeanor. Even though it was one episode, the return of Michelle Forbes as Ro Laren, was the highlight as her character was redeemed in a way that fans always wanted. Seeing Deanna Troi, played by Marina Sirtis, was more in tune with her empathic side, and being one of the instrumental heroes of the season was also a highlight we wanted to see. The industry can not forget how much the women impacted this season and with an award season causing so much buzz, It is important we focus on why. 

All in all, the entire cast of Season 3 of Star Trek: Picard was the best mix anyone could hope for. We already knew that the TNG cast was perfect, but adding the new characters just focused more on that. We love these characters and we love the actors that play them. Let’s give them the attention they deserve because, without them, Season 3 wouldn’t have been what it was.

J

[bvunniebaby]

the evans and their favorite arctic monkeys album (gn!reader x the evans)

note: this only consists of tate, kit, kyle, jimmy, jpm, rory and kai— their seasons are the only ones i've watched LMAO. they're also the only ones i think would listen to the monkeys.

CAUTION: opinions, slight mentions of intercourse, mentions of being impregnated, cursing, and ahs spoilers.

tate langdon - favorite worst nightmare

-he's definitely a big fwn guy, alex turner wrote 'do me a favor' just for him I JUST KNOW IT. the album title fits him too.

-he found out about arctic monkeys through you when he was looking at your spotify playlist. he found the band name a little bit silly so he played it but to his surprise, he actually liked it.

-his favorite songs have to be brianstorm and d is for dangerous.

-he probably also like 'humbug' and 'whatever people say i am, that's what i'm not'.

kit walker - the car

-not so sure about this but considering that he works at a gas station, 'the car' kinda fits him and it also sounds kinda old and funky so i think kit would like that

-he probably listens to arctic monkeys when you play it in your record player. he wasn't really a big fan of it at first but he grew into it and the band reminds him alot about you so he really likes it now.

-his favorite song is probably 'i ain't quite where i think i am' and 'body paint'

-he also likes tranquility base hotel and casino and plays it after a long day at work

kyle spencer - whatever people say i am, that's what i'm not + humbug

pre-death

-he definitely likes wpsia and relates to it.

-he discovered it at a frat party and liked it. he probably listens to them after class. you both became friends because you also liked the monkeys.

- his favorite song has to be 'riot van', 'certain romance', and 'mardy bum'

-he also likes am because who doesn't

franken kyle

-humbug is his favorite because of how slow it is and how it's not as fast paced like the other albums.

-he listens to arctic monkeys when you play it and cuddle with him. you play it so much while you guys cuddle to the point where he associates the band with cuddling.

-his favorite songs are 'secret door' and 'cornerstone'

-he also likes tbhc because it's calm, he gets jumpscared when 'she looks like fun' plays though. he also likes 'i wanna be yours', the calm stuff basically.

jimmy darling - am

-jimmy definitely likes 'am'. his hair is also just as musty and covered in hair gel like alex in his late 'sias' and 'am' era.

-he heard 'am' through the local radio and really liked it. he sings 'r u mine?' for you in one of his performances on the freak show, and you absolutely love it.

-one of his favorites are 'do i wanna know?', 'fireside', and 'snap out of it', but absolutely despises 'why'd you only call me when you're high?' because he says "the lyrics are too real".

-jimmy stays loyal to his beloved 'am', probably because he doesn't know other albums exist, you're trying to get him into 'sias' though.

james patrick march - tranquility base hotel and casino

-james adores 'tbhc', he thinks the storytelling and the story itself is genius. but even how much he likes it, he wouldn't be caught alive listening to it (probably because he's dead).

-he first listened to the monkeys when you asked him to play something that isn't jazz. you forced him to spin one of your records, so he picked 'tbhc' because he found the title intriguing. he loves it but would never admit to you.

-'star treatment', 'one point perspective', and the title track are always on repeat for him. he thinks 'golden trunks' are the two of yous' song.

-james probably doesn't explore the arctic monkeys much, he listened to 'the car' but it was too modern for his taste.

rory monahan - suck it and see

-assuming that rory lives in california, he would definitely listen to "sias'. he also fits the album's aesthetic very well.

-you both discovered arctic monkeys at a record store. he picked 'suck it and see' as a joke and because he's a borny little shit. to his surprise, he ended up liking it though.

-'black treacle', 'piledriver waltz', and the title track are his favorites. you'd both debate on which one is better: the 'sias' version of 'piledriver waltz' or alex turner's version, he always defends the 'sias' version for some reason.

-he probably listens to the other albums but not as much as he does to 'sias'.

kai anderson - am

-he doesn't listen to 'am' that much, he doesn't listen to music that much in general. he thinks it's something sacred and should only be listened to when doing something holy, like creating a messiah with your sister through your gay boy toy twink cult member.

-he discovered 'am' through the internet, and plays it typically when he works out or attempting to "create a messiah" with you.

-he only listens to 'do i wanna know' because it's average republican behavior—he also only listens to mainstream music so like it's the only song he knows.

-as i said, mainstream music type of guy, so definitely only am.

[kinda-indecisive]

Writeblr Introduction

~~~About the author~~~

Hi, I tend to go by macey here online since it’s in the username of my other tumblr (@maceyscreator). I am a black mexican american writer and my pronouns are she/her, but i’m not super attached to ‘em (even if I was born with ‘em).

Picrew link

I write mainly romance, fantasy, spooky shit, and YA stuff and I’m still trying to figure out what my traditional publishing niche would be. Fanfic wise, I write super indulgently lol

I would describe my current, main WIP as a romance.

My dream is to make a webcomic or graphic novel. I already have some ideas, but my drawing level is way behind my writing level lol

I love reading so many different genres, it’s probably impossible to keep track, though I mainly read what I write, plus classic literature.

In addition to reading and writing, I like crocheting, yoga and pilates, indoor plant care, my cat, my chickens, philosophizing, and goofing around.

Lately I’ve been watching the Ghibli movies for the first time. And I recently have become a Love and Deepspace girlie lol

I’m also happy to receive asks, messages, tags, and the like. I like making friends! However know that you will be blocked if you think being a dick is cute :)

~~~About this blog~~~

These days I've mainly been writing for my AO3, I'm called maceyscreature there. I've been sharing and reblogging aesthetics that relate to my OCs and WIPs. I also post/reblog some poetry (mine and others), journal entries, writing tips, and a couple random things I find interesting. My original stuff is here or under the "my stuff" tag. I’d like to share snippets from my WIPs in the future. 

I share lots of fandom on here, but mostly try to share fandom of the fics that I write. You’ll likely see:

Aquaman (2018)

Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom

DCEU

Greek Mythology

Lore Olympus

Love and Deepspace (NEW!)

Movies Patrick Wilson starred in because he’s cute

And more!

~~~Current WIPs~~~

Of Land, Ocean, and Sky

Fanfic | Romance | Superhero | Greek Mythology | Crossover

Tags: Aquaman (2018), Justice League (2017), DCEU, Lore Olympus, Original Work

Tumblr Tags: OLO&S, Althera, Orm Marius

Althera Prince is a woman with fantastic abilities, a dark past, and a potentially bright future. When she meets Prince Orm Marius in a temporary, high-security Atlantean prison the pair suddenly find their lives taking a parallel trajectory neither of them ever expected. Word Count: 360,000+

I will be updating with more WIPs in the future, please stay tuned :)

[confused-disaster32]

Okay so this is kinda mildly related to the post I made a while back about people making a crossover between diff Mike Faist characters but also slightly unrelated.

Anyways - here are some of my HCs that Art Donaldson can sing (Pls don't hate if you don't like/think it's OOC and stuff - this is pretty much completely self indulgent)

He's always been able to sing, and he actually really likes it

In terms of natural talent this is probably the thing that he's best at - like yeah he's good at tennis but he's always had to train super hard - when it comes to singing it's like how Patrick is just naturally great at tennis

He also happens to like musical theatre - when they're kids Patrick teases him for it and Art tries to say smth about how there are plenty of straight male theatre kids out there (Patrick always scoffs, but he lets it be)

When he's younger he even joins a choir and in school he checks out if they have a musical theatre club - when they do he joins

When he starts to get very into tennis he stops any extracurriculars that include singing, he's got to work extremely hard to be as good (or one day maybe even better) then Patrick

He still likes it he just doesn't have time, by the time they're in college it's something he really only occasionally does in the shower or if they're at karaoke or something (and occasionally just when he's really drunk)

Additionally with all the exercises and practice (and pining over one (both really - though he doesn't know it) of his friends) he doesn't really even have time to consume musical media like he used to

In fact the first time Tashi hears him sing it's cause he's drunk and he just happens to like the song on the radio

He doesn't sound as good as if he was sober but Tashi makes a little comment about him not sounding too bad later

When Tashi gets injured (and when they start dating) he pretty much stops all together - he has to work hard to be great, because he wants to be great (and because he wants Tashi to be proud of him, because he knows that she was the one who should've become a great tennis player and he figures maybe if he can be good enough for her she'll be able to live through him just a little bit and she'll stop looking so sad and maybe that little bit of hatred in her eyes will finally disappear)

When his daughter is born he doesn't stay home for long - no matter how much he wants to - but when he does he offers to sing her lullabies and sometimes Tashi will watch

In those moments their home feels genuinely filled with love and warmth

Then he goes back to tennis

When he gets injured he's at home for a while and he lets himself go back to some of the things he enjoyed

He watches movies with his daughter and catches up on musicals that he hadn't seen yet

More then once Tashi comes home and Art and their daughter (srry I don't actually know/remember her name) are both cuddled up together, maybe they're asleep, maybe they're awake but there's always the sound of a Disney movie playing softly in the background - like if they did fall asleep it midway through the movie

Art's not entirely sure when he started to want to retire but moments like that sure did help the decision

He stops singing again when he gets back on the court - he's lost his confidence from being away for so long and now he has to face Patrick - he feels kinda like shit

When he finally retires he finds a lot of time to do things whilst Patrick and Tashi are out of the house

He catches up on even more musicals and goes back to learning the songs that are his favourites

He dances around with his daughter and almost every time that Tashi and/or Patrick comes back late he's either on that couch by himself or with his daughter

When his daughter talks about wanting to sing he supports her fully and even teaches her how to not hurt her throat when she sings

He also offers to let her join a junior choir

He never quite pushes her - not like some parents push their children to become stars

He wants her to still be able to enjoy it as a past time - because sometimes making things into a challenge can suck the light and fun and happiness out of something (and boy does he know it)

For the first time in years (or maybe ever) the Donaldson (and Zweig because Patrick is pretty much always there) household is filled with music and singing and laughter

Tashi still gets to live with her life including tennis and Patrick gets a great coach and Art just gets to enjoy himself, spend time as a father and maybe get back into a hobby that he thought he's have to drop for a career

[lcnelyghost]

imagine forcing the ahs boys to watch titanic with you bc it’s you’re ultimate fav!! ♥︎

a/n: i was rewatching titanic today and thought why not make a fic about it? titanic was such an excellent movie and definitely well made!! although, some scenes hit harder than others. potential warning if titanic triggers you in any sort of way!

GIFS ARE NOT MINE!!!!

———————————

tate langdon:

• He’s heard his mother mentioning it a few times, I think it was probably on in the background one time though back then he didn’t pay much attention.

• Always shows a little bit of respect seeing as it was something that truly happened.

• Tate hates it when Cal walks onto the screen.

• Feels extremely bad for the children and animals who had to deal with the amount of mayhem that was going on whilst the ship was sinking.

• Doesn’t think Jack and Rose were necessary in the film, but he knows that Kate Winslet and Leonardo DiCaprio are good actors.

kit walker:

• One of his FAVOURITE movies to watch with you!

• He thinks the little bond Jack and Cora have is really sweet.

• Walks around the house trying to recreate the Irish dancing scene to get a giggle out of you.

• Gets really pissed that some men were paying people to put themselves first on a lifeboat before children.

• He almost shed a tear when Jack and Rose reunited after her death in the end. He’d 100% do that with you when the two of you were no longer alive.

kyle spencer:

• Okay, he actually saw Titanic as a kid and uh.. yeah. He’s traumatised.

• He gets really upset when you explain to him that the movie was based on real events.

• The noises the ship started to make when it began to go down, damn it terrifies him.

• Squeezes his eyes shut when the ship splits in half. Even you get slightly uncomfortable watching it.

• Kyle does actually think Titanic is good but he’s just a little scared of that really happening.

jimmy darling:

• A movie that he’ll secretly enjoy but not tell anyone about it.

• Always thinks the length of the movie is worth it.

• Elsa’s always blabbing on about how much she would’ve loved to be in it, so Jimmy just acts as though he’s never even seen it.

• He’s witnessed too many teenage girls giggling and squealing in the diner whilst talking about Jack Dawson.

• Jimmy won’t lie, Jack was a really great character. Probably someone he could relate to from time to time.

james patrick march:

• Constantly hits out with a wad of ways to try and justify how he could’ve been on the Titanic.

“My dear, I could’ve easily been on that ship! I could’ve been one of the ones who lost my life trying to flee from that horrible disaster!!”

“James.. i’m sure my grandparents also could have..”

“BUT MY LOVE, I COULD HAVE BEEN DEAD IN THE SEA! IT WAS DURING MY TIME!!! COULD YOU IMAGINE LIFE WITHOUT MY BELOVED CORTEZ??”

• He secretly thinks that Rose is an extremely attractive woman. You couldn’t necessarily argue with that.

• Doesn’t see why people hate Cal so much. (Why James, WHYYYYYY)

• James LOVES LOVES LOVESSSS Titanic. He finds modern movies extremely uncomfortable, but he’s obsessed with this one.

• Despite him definitely not being one to do this himself, he thought Jack and Rose participating in the Irish dancing looked incredibly fun.

tristan duffy:

• Cracks really insensitive jokes whilst watching Jack and other people practically freezing to death in the water.

“Damn, you think his dick froze off from how cold that shit was?”

• As a teenager, he’d ask his mom if he could watch it just to get flashed by Kate Winslet’s tits.

• Rants for hours about how Rose promised she wouldn’t let go, BUT LET JACK FALL DEEPER INTO THE FUCKING WATER UNTIL HE SANK.

• Thought he could pull off the ‘Leonardo DiCaprio look’ when he was younger.

• WANTS TO RECREATE THE CAR SCENE SO BADLY 😭

dandy mott:

• Dandy’s incredibly jealous of the actors who worked on this movie. It’s one of his greatest desires to be starring in a film like Titanic.

• Has the excitement of a young child when you decide to put it on.

• He’s rather envious of Jack. Having such a free feeling like that.. it’s something Dandy has always wanted to experience.

• HE WANTS TO BUY YOU THE HEART OF THE OCEAN NECKLACE SO FUCKING BADDDD

• Half way through the film, you both watch with extreme sadness. Drowning was something that terrified Dandy. And you felt awful for the people who had to witness multiple loved ones doing so. Little did you and him both know…

[dertaglichedan]

Journalist threatened with jail over publishing trans shooter Audrey Hale's deranged journal writings

A journalist from the Tennessee Star is being summoned to appear in court and faces jail time for publishing journal writings of transgender shooter Audrey Hale, sparking freedom of the press concerns.

The article revealed that Hale, who shot and killed six people at the Covenant Elementary school in March 2023, wrote about her 'imaginary penis' and how she would 'kill' to get puberty blockers weeks before her horrific act.

For more than a year, Nashville Chancellor I’Ashea Myles has been presiding over a public records case wherein the plaintiffs are suing to get the right to release documents related to the shooting. Families of the victims are on the exact opposite side, trying to bury the documents and keep them out of the public eye.

But since the case in ongoing, Myles is claiming that the Tennessee Star may have published 'certain purported documents and information' that should have remained under seal. 

At Myle's request, Tennessee Star editor-in-chief Michael Patrick Leahy will appear in court Monday to explain why his news outlet didn't violate the court order.

[bananaofswifts]

Sorry, Hayley Williams and Fall Out Boy: Marjorie has stolen the show again. Not that Taylor Swift’s beloved grandmother actually puts in a vocal appearance from the great beyond, as she did on the “Evermore” album three years ago. But Marjorie Finlay still manages to be a dominative force in the Vault Tracks for the newly released “Speak Now (Taylor’s Version),” by having her photos appear throughout the lyric video for the closing track, “Timeless,” and having her relationship with Taylor’s granddad be a focus of the inspirational ballad. Twenty-first-century pop-punk or emo can hardly compete with that emotional a capper.

But for those less sentimentally inclined, Paramore’s singer and Fall Out Boy’s Patrick Stump will be way up there in what Swift fans immediately take away from the six previously unheard compositions that have been appended to the previous 16-track running order of 2010’s “Speak Now.” The duet with Williams, “Castles Crumbling,” is particularly pungent, as a lament that just about could have been an outtake from the more recent “Folklore” or “Evermore” instead of an album that came out a full decade before those. As for the FOB-aided track, it’s the farthest thing from a Swift classic. But — having been written, like the rest of these tracks, when the artist was 18 or 19 — the number does hark back to an era when girls (and Fall Out Boys) could just wanna have fun.

A more careful inspection of the 16 re-recorded tracks will have to wait, since the details of what feels the same or different bear a certain amount of forensic analysis, or at least repeated A/B comparisons. (Of course, the whole world has just done an instant side-by-side of the altered lyrics of “Better Than Revenge” — see our story about that here.) But before we figure out how more or less haunting the new “Haunted” is, here are insta-reactions to the six never-before-heard tunes.

“Electric Touch”: Although the recreations of the 16 original songs credit Christopher Rowe as Swift’s co-producer (filling in for O.G. producer Nathan Chapman), when it comes to the six Vault Tracks, Swift splits those producing collaborations between her two modern-day mainstays, Aaron Dessner and Jack Antonoff. Neither guy gets to do anything either as modern-sounding or eccentric as they have on Swift’s last few albums — they stay true to the stylistic spirit of 2010, for the most part, with the organic pop-rock band sound she favored at the time. “Electric Touch” is probably the least immediately interesting song here, compositionally; it lacks any of the truly great, peculiar lines that mark a Swift song as unmistakably hers (or “Mine”). Yet embedded underneath the hopeful, anthemic and — honestly — somewhat generic rock veneer is a lot of the pessimism and self-doubt that goes so far toward making Swift our most relatable superstar. “I’m trying hard not to look like I’m trying,” Stump sings, stealing some of 19-year-old Taylor’s lines, “’cause every time I tried hard for love it fell apart.” It’s the uneasy tension between luck and predestined loss that gives this one a little tension amid the breeziness, before it tips on the side of even the losers getting lucky sometimes.

“When Emma Falls in Love”: Dessner is at the co-reins again on this one, but this time leading things off with a lilting piano that lends the song a childlike spirit. On the scale of sweet songs about fictional girls that have Swift doing a little third-person projecting, “Emma” is close to being up with there with “Betty.” “She’s the kind of book that you can’t put down / Like if Cleopatra grew up in a small town / And all the bad boys would be good boys / If they only had a chance to love her.” Any chance this could actually be about a small-town gal from Reading, Pennsylvania? Nah, because Emma makes all the right moves and figures out that’s how you get the boy. It has a happy ending right out of “Love Story,” but by the time of making what was her third album, Swift was feeling like she had to assign something that cheerful to an alter ego.

“I Can See You”: Well, now, here is a groove. Jack Antonoff comes on board for the first time on the revamped album, and you might have to look to “1989’s” “Style” to find another song in the Swift catalog that benefits as much from the simple electric funkiness of a well-played rhythm guitar. (This particular riff sounds especially fine in headphones, landing just off the beat and bouncing between ears ever so slightly.) Swift never had an office job, but must have attended Take Your Daughter to Work Day just enough to wonder what it’d be like to seduce a guy in a suit and tie. “I could see you up against the wall with me,” she sings — because she knows places you two can hide, and they’re just around the corner from the copy machine!

“Castles Crumbling”: As mentioned, this sounds like a flash-forward to the Swift Songbook of 2020, and surely would have had a different production in 2010 than it gets now with the artist and Antonoff updating as a more modern mood piece. Williams is her duet partner on this one, and it recalls Swift’s vocal collaboration with Phoebe Bridgers on the previous “Taylor’s Version” just a little, in that both this song and “Nothing New” have her writing about foreseeing the end of her fame, or at least her acclaim. In a way, its paranoia prefigures the defensiveness against a fan base she sees turning on her that would come to real fruition in later years on the “Reputation” album. But in another sense, this is the less chin-up mirror image of “Mean,” a song that obviously did make the original “Speak Now.” “Mean” had her bucking up against a blogger who told her she “can’t sing,” and in this number, it’s as if she imagines a whole nation of fans as that blogger, turning backs on her. It’s like she’s following that maxim about imagining the worst and you won’t get disappointed.

“Foolish One”: A strummed acoustic guitar starts this one, and although a bit of drum programming soon kicks in that probably isn’t what Nathan Chapman would’ve done, it still belongs distinctly to the turn of the decade it came from. As with “Electric Touch,” this teeters back and forth between possible optimism about the outcome of a relationship and fatalism, but lands on the side of one-sided love doomed to go to heck in a handbasket. It still sounds impossibly cheerful, in the way that Swift’s falsetto tips up at the end of lines, as is so often her trademark, with a final realization: “He just wasn’t the one.” What’s with this gentle acceptance, for a singer we want to obsess over scarves forever?

“Timeless”: The most truly “organic”-sounding of all the bonus tracks on this new edition — it has ukulele and flute floating in the background behind those acoustic guitars and organs — “Timeless” is a ballad you can imagine Swift having considered for a “Speak Now” album-closer at the time, instead of the brotherhood-of-the-road anthem “Long Live.” Most of the initial lyric videos Swift put up on YouTube have visuals of the static or circular screen-saver variety, but this one is the exception, consisting largely of a lot of photographs of Swift’s grandparents, modeling a great love she believes would have happened in any era, falling just shy of putting in an endorsement for reincarnation. It’s not the emotional tour de force that the song “Marjorie” was — there’s no otherworldly soprano reaching out from beyond the grave to jerk your tears, here, and good, since fans can only handle so much of that in one lifetime. But the grandmother’s solely visual cameo may still ply misty from you.