#shes a frog so its gotta be breezy right

[tazzmanian-devil]

heres my entry for the “donnies shitty terrible girlfriend” competition. wait what do you mean its not a competition

@nerves-nebula said i can do whatever i want forever so i decided to make amphibian propaganda. if amphibian doesnt win ill...ill...i dont know, throw up maybe. she doesnt have a mouth but she CAN beam words into your brain, or something.

[pbandjesse]

I feel really exhausted today. I dont feel as bad as I did but it has still been a little hard. I could not fall asleep or get comfortable last night and it was not fun at all. I was up until almost 2 and when I did sleep I had very active dreams and it wasnt even good sleep. Sucked. 

So when my alarm went off I told James I needed 5 more minutes. Which made it so I had to leave right away once I was washed and dressed. So it was a little bit of a stressful morning. 

But I got to work on time. And it was a nice enough day. We have 3 more kids registered but they are probably coming tomorrow. So it was just our small crew. But we were all kind of off today. Tired. 

Dasia came in late because her mom was flying back into town and her flight got delayed and it was a whole thing. The twins were there when I was and they were both tired. Caylee was in baby voice mode all day, and Caleb was just poking at his sister all day. But we did do some beading and that was fun. Hopefully well do more tomorrow. I probably could have been a better teacher but I was just really tired so we only did it for their first break. 

Once the other two girls got there we were all mostly just in class mode. I worked on sewing but I could barely focus on that. Today just sort of drug on. I did get some stuff done at least. And I read for a little while. 

We had lunch and me and the twins went outside for a while. It was very breezy today and it made me pretty cold. The first time we went out I remebered my jacket but the second time later in the day I forgot it inside and I was just so cold! My sweater was just to thin. I might put this one in storage. I have so many black sweaters so it wouldnt be the worst thing to put one away. 

Because everyone was so tired we pulled out the yoga mats and the kids all made nap areas. We used the big pieces of fabric in the closet as blankets and the bags of stuffing as pillows. It was very silly. But we had the lights off and for the most part they all focused on their work and it was all good. We were all sleepy though and I was shorter on patience for nonsense today. Like sneaking on youtube when youre actually in class. Like sure have a youtube video on while youre doing work, but not during the actual class. I know the class is stupid. I get it. But this is how this year is and yes I know the mask is annoying but we gotta wear them why have I had to ask 10 times in the last half hour. I might do a check mark system and if they get enough positive checks for masks Ill give them candy? Well see. I hate rewarding when its something they should just do, but this is a weird year. 

The second time we went outside we sung on the swings and on my silk for a while. But by the end of the hour we were all sort of whiny and tire. And so we went inside and cleaned up and I got ready to leave. 

I was very tired at this point. I checked in with Evers and gave him updates of the day. Told him the book requests from the kids. Turns out they are having someone from the library coming to bring books anyway so it was just a nice coincidence. 

I headed home. Took a different way home and it was nice. I stopped at burgerking and got a milkshake and when I got home I made the veggie popcorn chicken and it was alright. I might bake them longer next time to make them crispier but they were still nice. 

After I ate I decided I would sleep for a bit. Which ended up being almost 2 hours. I woke up very dehydrated and very confused because the sun had gone down. I changed into my new sweatshirt and got something to drink and I felt a little better. I checked on our animal crossing island and you can catch leaves right now! That was exciting but I was bad at it and got frustrated. 

I did some and work in my studio for a bit. I have two commissioned big frogs this week and so I sent them some fabric ideas. I also stuffed and finished a few other friends. I have to go through my frog box again though because I think I may have missed a bunch when I photographed before so I think Im gong to retake all the ones I still have? Well see. No sales today but James did get the two from friday sent out today. The printer issue seems to be a known thing so he found a work around and printed the labels in blue. He's so smart. 

I did the dishes and now I am just laying in the studio. I think I am going to go take a shower and get in bed. I am really hoping I can get easier sleep tonight. Dasia isnt going to be in tomorrow, so I will be alone with the kids. Which is fine, she is mostly just another set of eyes in the room. I wonder if the three new kids will be nice? I hope so. 

I also hope you all have a good night. Please keep washing your hands. And try to stay in. I know our government hasnt made it easy for us and hasnt set a good example. But we got to do our best. 

Sleep well you guys.

[wunderlass]

Whiskey in the Jar

For RIPRoswell Day One: masks (and Candy, obviously).

Kindly beta read by @maxortecho despite her, er, enthusiasm for Michael

“We’re closed.”

Maria doesn’t look up from the table she’s clearing down as she says the words. She recognizes the footsteps, even if it annoys her that she does. At least it allows her to modulate her tone, keeping it light, keeping her back to the incomer. 

If she didn’t recognize the footsteps she’d be wary, retreating to the bar where her shotgun is hidden. Strangers after closing are never a good thing, especially after a busy night like tonight. Halloween brings the strange ones out.

“You always say that,” Guerin dismisses. He seems to take her words—or maybe her tone—as an invitation, continuing his path to the bar. He throws himself onto one of the stools and sprawls out, legs akimbo, one corner of his mouth tilted like its threatening to turn into a smirk.

“That’s ‘cause you keep turning up after closing.” She gives up on the table, collecting a bunch of glasses before crossing to the bar herself.

He waits for her to reach him before he leans across to grab the closest bottle. The good whiskey. Always the good whiskey.

“Nuh-uh,” she says, swooping in before he can reach it. “You know the rules. No service unless you’re in costume.”

“I am in costume,” he protests. “I’m an alien!”

“Yeah. I definitely remember ET’s iconic cowboy boots.” She doesn’t release her grip on the whiskey. “A costume involves you coming as something you aren’t.”

He grunts, then turns his attention to the rest of the room. Her staff have done a good job of cleaning up before she sent them home, but there are areas she hasn’t gotten to yet. That includes the pool table, where a costume mask has been discarded upside down, its blank inner side the only part visible.

Guerin’s seen it too. It twitches on the green baize, levitating a few inches, before shooting across the room into his outstretched hand. 

He turns it over, raises an eyebrow at the little green man face staring up at him. “See?” he says, flourishing it so she can see it before he fastens it to the top of his head, elastic tucked beneath his chin. “Alien.”

She hands him the bottle wordlessly, flustered by his easy display of his powers.

The way his fingers curl around the bottle only fluster her more. They’re strangely elegant for a man’s hands, less battered and greasy than they have any right to be for belonging to a mechanic. They should be oil-stained and calloused, but they always look clean when he turns up at the Pony.

He raises the head of the bottle to his mouth, takes the stopper between his teeth with a glint in his eyes that says he knows she’s watching. Pulls it loose and drops it onto the counter, and none of this is enticing. None of it. It’s some stupid display of machismo  that she’d ban anybody else for even considering.

 In a moment he’ll bring the bottle to his mouth, pucker his lips just enough, tip his head back to expose the curve of his throat. She’ll be able to watch him swallow, and the thought of him in that position makes her want to swallow too.

Stupid face. Stupid hands. It’s not fair how a simple act can have an effect like this on her. 

She doesn’t let it get that far, slamming a clean glass down in front of him. “No more health code violations, Guerin. I’ve gotta sell that stuff to other customers.”

He almost slips and lets his grin break through, the tip of his tongue flicking out to wet his lips. Instead he shrugs and dutifully pours some of the whiskey into the glass. 

“How come you’re still tidying up?” he asks. “Can’t you just cast a spell to magic it all back to normal?”

He’s referring to her costume. Tonight, she’s Rochelle from The Craft, in a white shirt and black pleated skirt, and she thinks the reference has passed most of the customers by. Apparently not Guerin, and he seems appreciative of the look too.

“My specialty is turning men into frogs,” she replies. “I don’t use my powers for patriarchal bullshit. Besides, you’re the one with telekinesis.”

He knocks back the whiskey with a wink, and she can’t help rolling her eyes at that. Then, one by one, glasses around the room lift into the air, floating across the room in a strange, silent procession. 

Maria backs up against the wall, her heart in her throat at the sight of them all magician’s apprenticing their way towards her, but all they do is set down gently on the bar, lining up in rows.

This is no party trick. This is a skill. This is real power.

Guerin is watching her reaction carefully, the earlier glint dimmed into something graver. Like he’s waiting for her to finally ban him for real.

Seeing is different to simply knowing. Seeing is believing. Seeing is having the air knocked out of her lungs.

He tips his empty glass towards her. “Trick or treat?”

She blinks. It’s just Guerin. Nothing has changed. She knows more about him now, and isn’t that a good thing? The mask has come off and he’s showing her who he really is.

She unglues her tongue from the roof of her mouth. Picks up the whiskey bottle and pours him another. “Do you think you can get the cobwebs down without me having to use the ladder?” She’s bright and breezy, like him flaunting his powers is no big deal. 

All the graveness has vanished, replaced by a knowing determination. She feels like she’s passed some kind of test as he nods an easy affirmative in answer to her question. 

“Sure. I can have this place back to its normal decrepit self before midnight. You gonna clear my tab in return?”

It feels like the heat of the alcohol is sliding down her own throat when she responds, pooling further down than her stomach. “Maybe. Or I was thinking there’s a warm bed here for you. Since you shouldn’t be driving drunk.”

“I’m not drunk.”

“Not on the whiskey. Not yet,” she tells him, picking up a bottle of her personal poison. This time, his gaze is on her hand, tracking its movement as she lifts the tequila to her mouth. Tips her head back. Takes a long drag, letting its warmth mimic the sensations Guerin elicits in her.

She meets his stare. Removes the bottle and licks her lips.

“There’s plenty for you to be drinking in tonight,” she says, backing towards the door that leads through to the kitchen, and then to her apartment.

Guerin doesn’t need telling twice. He’s scrambling off his stool after her, like a man who’s been wandering the desert for days and is now desperate for water. She’s happy to oblige.

[littlereyofsunlight]

Goodbye, Dreamland (part 1)

Steggyweek2k18 Day 2! Part 2 of this needs a little more polishing, so it’ll be up later today. This one goes out to @roboticonography and @indiefic, who spit-balled ideas with me for this story one fine May day.

Fic: Goodbye, Dreamland Pairing: Steve/Peggy Rating: T+ Summary:  Steve and Peggy take a trip to Coney Island in an alternate-timeline in which Peggy is brought to the future and Ultron never happened.

“It’s real different than my day,” Steve said, slight hesitation slowing his voice. They’d come out of the sprawling Coney Island subway station on Stillwell between Mermaid and Surf, right by the Subway sandwich shop, into a dazzlingly bright late June morning. A solitary breeze wafted the sea air past overflowing trash bins, combining those scents into a familiar Brooklyn perfume as they walked up the steps by the improbably twisted red and blue tracks of a roller coaster.

Peggy, preoccupied with digging into her beach bag to touch up her sunscreen—it had been over two hours since she’d last put it on, and all of today’s literature suggested, as did Peggy’s own fair-skinned experience thus far this summer, that reapplication was necessary after that much sun exposure—so she didn’t quite catch it. “Well darling, it’s been seventy years.” She held up the tube, triumphant, then frowned up at him from under her floppy-brimmed hat. “Also, wasn’t there a flood recently?”

Steve shoved his hands in his shorts pockets and started to amble down the boardwalk. “2012, Superstorm Sandy. Maybe five months after the Chitauri attack on Manhattan.”

“Steve,” Peggy said, realization dawning as she rubbed extra SPF onto her cheeks, “I thought you hadn’t been here since you’d…” She stumbled over just what to call it, his miraculous return to the living.

“Since I was defrosted?” There was a sardonic edge Peggy didn’t miss this time. Wisely she held her tongue, knowing he’d elaborate in his own time. She offered him the sunscreen, but he wrinkled his nose and waved it away. “We all watched the storm from Stark Tower. There was a crane in Midtown that collapsed, and Tony went out in the middle of it, to secure that. But mostly we could only sit around til it passed.” He looked over at her. “Hell of a view, though.”

He took her hand, directed her past the entrance to Luna Park, headed away from most of the crowds. “They thought I’d be helpful here, since there had been looting. The beach had been washed clear up over this whole boardwalk, and all I saw were store owners trying to clean out and citizens just trying to get by when everything was closed or wrecked.” He shrugged, and Peggy squeezed his hand. “Coulda done something more in Breezy Point, maybe, but I went where they sent me.”

“Steve, I wish you’d told me.”

He gave her a lopsided smile and squeezed back. “Well, you said you wanted to come. I know you lived in the city for a while before you came to this time, so I figured you liked it, or maybe hadn’t had the chance to visit.”

Peggy gave a brittle laugh and stopped walking so she could face him. “Neither, I’m afraid. I have been before, and I was miserable the whole time.” Steve blanched, frown lines forming between his brows. “Darling, I came out here when I first moved because you’d spoken fondly of it, and then I spent the entire day crying about you, because you weren’t with me. I suggested this trip because I thought you’d want to see it again.”

His confusion gave way to sadness as his heart clenched, thinking of Peggy alone on a bench, staring out at the freezing winter surf and missing him. He drew her close, intending to sweep her into a hug.

But Peggy started laughing as she watched the emotions play across Steve’s face. “Listen to us! This isn’t an O. Henry story, Steve, it’s a trip to Coney Island! Sunshine! Roller coasters! Hot dogs! Splashing in the water! For pity’s sake, we’re here together and the beach is back where it’s supposed to be, so let’s just enjoy it.” When he smiled in return, she rewarded him by throwing her arms around his neck and pulling him down for a kiss so deep, an onlooker wolf-whistled as they passed.

“You know,” Steve said, straightening his crooked collar, “I have a feeling today’s going to be a good day.”

Some time later, having walked the length of the boardwalk several times to soak up the sun and take in all their options for amusement, Peggy happened to remove her sunglasses and see just how red Steve, staunch refuser of sun protection, had gotten since they’d arrived. “Steven Rogers!” she exclaimed. “You are turning into a lobster before my eyes.”

Steve gingerly touched his nose and winced at the too-tight, sore feeling of a sunburn. “It won’t last,” he said, sheepish. “As soon as I’m out of the sun, I’ll be fine.”

Peggy goggled at him. “We have no indoor plans! Do you mean to tell me I’m to spend my entire day with a man turning ever-increasing shades of red?” He shrugged. “Steve, doesn’t it hurt?”

He squirmed under her scrutiny. “I’ve had worse.”

Peggy snorted. “Forgive me if I don’t exactly trust your sense of scale. I’m buying you a hat right now.” She steered him into a souvenir shop. “Your ears look absurd!”

Though he protested the bucket hat Peggy had first tried to cram onto his skull and lobbied unsuccessfully for a baseball cap (“Steve, your ears!”), they eventually compromised on a straw trilby, which had enough of a brim to satisfy Peggy’s shade requirements and didn’t make Steve feel as though he’d missed the boat for a fishing trip, or a John Candy movie. In retaliation, Steve picked out a t-shirt while Peggy was at the register. He wouldn’t let her see it until they’d left the store.

“Oh, bloody Nora!” Peggy pulled the shirt from its plastic bag. “Honestly, Steve, this is a complete waste of money. You should return it.”

“What?” Steve asked, all innocence now that he’d managed to turn the tables. “It’s cheeky. You’re cheeky. I thought you could use a souvenir.”

Peggy turned the shirt over to examine the back, which, like the front, was printed with a cartoon woman’s bikini-clad body. “It’s cheeky, all right,” Peggy muttered. “I’m never wearing it,” she told him.

“That hurts. You don’t like my gift?” He tried to hold a pout but the outraged look on Peggy’s face was too much, and he broke down in giggles. “It’s terrible!”

“It is terrible!” Peggy couldn’t fathom why he’d bought it.

Steve slung his arm around her shoulders and started walking again. “It’s not a day at Coney without a terrible souvenir.” He went to drop a kiss against her temple, but Peggy’s sensible hat got in the way and all he got was straw and a bit of grosgrain ribbon. “You’re welcome, my dear.”

“Thank you,” Peggy grumbled, outrage melting slightly as she shoved the offending shirt into her bag. “Still not wearing it.”

“Nah, you’re way too classy for that shirt.” Steve agreed. “We can give it to Tony when we get home.”

That, at least, made her smile. “He would like this shirt.”

“The man’s got no class, we all know it.”

They’d arrived at the entrance for the midway games, and Peggy had an idea. “You know what? I think it’s time I took you to school, Rogers.” She grabbed his hand and set off through the milling crowd, making a beeline for the shooting range. When they arrived, Steve took one look at the carnival game and then looked back at her. “Loser buys lunch?” she suggested, oh-so-casual.

Steve chuckled, knowing just what he was getting himself into, but he still said yes. This was going to be fun.

Twenty minutes later, the barker running the shooting range was pleading with Peggy to move along. “You’re intimidating everyone! No one wants to go up against you! I’m not gonna hit my numbers if you stick around, lady, come on.”

Peggy surveyed the small mountain of stuffed animals she’d amassed with her sharp-shooting skills. “Well, I suppose this will do, then.” She turned to Steve and loaded him up with an armful. “Let’s pass these out and then see what other games look fun.”

It didn’t take long for word to spread to all the kids on the midway that there were free toys to be had, and they quickly dispersed Peggy’s winnings among the group. Task accomplished, they decided against the ring toss and some game known as “Fried Frogs,” but Peggy made Steve stop when they reached the strength tester.

“Aw, Peggy, I hated this one back in the day,” Steve complained.

“Great,” Peggy winked at him. “Now you get another crack at it.”

Steve rubbed at the back of his (sunburned) neck. “I don’t know, isn’t it just...showing off now?”

“I don’t know why you’re not seeing that’s precisely the idea,” she said, a wicked gleam in her eye as she raked her gaze over his impressive physique. Oh. Now Steve got the point. Could you blush with a sunburn? Because he was pretty sure he was doing that just now, and feeling warm all through his body as Peggy continued to openly appreciate his looks.

Some of the kids had followed Peggy and Steve after the stuffed animals, so there was a small crowd to witness when Steve, quite unexpectedly brought the hammer down and broke both it and the bell when the force of his swing shot the puck straight through and off the tower.

“Woah!” One of the kids, a tousle-headed boy there with his chubby friend, exclaimed. “Did you see that Ned? Did you see it!”

“That guy’s gotta be as strong as Thor,” Ned replied.

Peggy just smirked while Steve stammered an apology to the flabbergasted worker. He couldn’t beg off when the woman insisted he take the prize he’d won, either, but Ned and his scrawny friend were all to happy to step forward when Steve offered it to them.

“Are you Thor?” The kid shouted at Steve, eyes wide with awe. “Mister, are you THOR?”

“Peter, you can’t ASK people if they’re Thor!” Peggy heard Ned admonish as they waddled away, dragging a giant stuffed bear between them. “What if he’s UNDERCOVER?”

Laughing, Peggy looked back at a still embarrassed Steve. “Well, is it time I collected on my winnings? I think I fancy a hot dog for lunch.”

All ten registers at the boardwalk Nathan’s were stacked at least twenty people deep. Peggy couldn’t quite make out the menu board from so far back, but Steve’s super-soldier eyesight was helpful in that endeavor.

“Two fifty for a hot dog?” Steve sputtered, incredulous. Several people turned to stare, Peggy included.

“We’ve been out to eat before, Steve. You know what things cost now.” This wasn’t the first time they’d had some version of this conversation, but she’d thought he had finally accepted the changes inflation had wrought over the past seventy-odd years.

He looked at her, then back at the menu plastered with colorful photos. “It’s just, the last time I ate a hot dog here, it cost me my last nickel.” He shook his head. “Bucky wound up sharing his lemonade with me ’cause I couldn’t afford a drink.”

Peggy grabbed his hand and laced her fingers with his. He gave her that lopsided smile again and she felt a sympathetic pang in her heart.

“Sorry, I’m doing it again. We’re here now and the sun is shining, right?”

Peggy tipped her chin up and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. “It’s a good day.”

Still, he’d drawn the line at buying himself more than a single hot dog and a small lemonade. Peggy rolled her eyes and ordered herself all the food she fancied, including the chilli cheese fries. Steve grumbled a bit but he didn’t welch on their bet.

He polished off his lunch in no time flat, then snuck fries off of Peggy’s plate when her hands were full of the burger she’d ordered. He stopped after she glared at him, because he knew better than to get overly familiar with Peggy’s food if she hadn’t offered. Eventually, slowed down a bit after the hamburger, hot dog and giant lemonade, she gave him a few more fries of her own accord.

Though it was past noon, the day seemed to just keep getting hotter. Steve suggested they duck into the small museum, but they were chased off by an overzealous docent who spouted one too many incorrect facts about the time period Steve had grown up in. Peggy suggested they try some of the rides, instead.

[ikonislife]

Better Together.

-Bobby x Reader

-Expecting parents au, fluff

-Here for You is another dad!Jiwon request I had. This request came in right after so I guess in a way, they’re in conjunction with one another. You don’t really have to read them together since they’re pretty much stand alone pieces but it’s nice to have a small continuation. Anyways, here ya go! 10 years late but I did it!!!

The world suddenly seemed so much bigger now that your range of mobility was limit to three feet out your front door, and occasionally down the street for a short walk with your dog, in which you’re no longer allowed to hold the leash. As per your doctor order? God no! In fact, your doctor always commented on how well taken care of you were at every single appointment. This preposterous house arrest is of course, as per your husband ordered. 

Jiwon had been beyond amazing throughout your whole pregnancy despite missing nearly every single parent-in-training class due to iKon’s hectic tour schedules. Possessing the vast knowledge of one book on pregnancy for dummy he once read before realizing that nothing the books offered could possibly save him from your fifth mood swing of the hour, nor the guilt he constantly feel watching you cried from the sheer endless aching of carrying a new life. Yet there he was every time your eyes glossed over with a new insane craving or another hormonal whine fest about how unfair it is that you’re the only one looking like a duck had swallowed a planet waddling around whilst he, dashing and breaking heart as ever. Every time you panic, every time you’d freak out over every little thing, he’d be there holding your hand, calm as a swan to guide you through. Even if only moments later you caught him on the brink of tear, rapping at top speed on the phone with Hanbin, no doubt letting lose all the worries he held back for the sake of your peace of mind. Poor Hanbin, bless his soul for being therapist/consultant for whatever it might be that Jiwon is ringing him up about now. He probably has it harder than you will ever experience because Jiwon has to be taking all that emotion somewhere. He sat through an hour of you ugly crying while sobbing because you lost the allan wrench that came with your new shelf. Even when Jiwon had presented another shiny allan wrench from another set of table he had saved after putting it together the week before, you were still bawling like a baby that it weren’t the same. The collection of bags under his eyes were at this point more extensive than your designer one that he had gifted you through the years. He took it all with the grace and braveness of a new dad, without ever letting you hear his complaints. 

Jiwon, your dear husband, he’s god sent, best you could’ve ever ask for so why was it you were screaming his name off the top of your lungs, muddling it with a strings of obscene curses? Well because it’s well into your 2nd hour of labor pain, which will only get worse from here as informed by your kind team of nurses. The insane hours of pain feels much like the wave crashing the shore, except, instead of the soothing water of the ocean and sunshine of the beach, it was waves of fire, and knives, and molten lava because all you could feel is searing pain. Jiwon sits beside you, his face had contorted into something so twisted he might as well check himself in for some surgery to morph it back to the handsome face he possessed before dropping all his schedule to rush to your side.

“Baby, does it hurt mu-” His whisper chopped off as quick as it had surfaced by a small yelp elicited by your nails digging into his palm. Now he had braved probably just as much pain as you had letting you clawed at him, pinched him, hold him to a point of bruising yet not even a whimper of complain. He knows whatever discomfort he might feel will never, ever be worthy enough to compare to what you’re about to go through.

“Does it hurt, Jiwon? Does it HURT? Are you seri- Oh my fucking shit. Are you being serious right now?” The audacity of this man to sit here and question whether or not you’re really in pain. Does he still not know how it work after the half an hour of you going into an hysterical rant, explaining in excruciating details of how babies are born?

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I know it hurts a lot. What can I do?” 

“Do you, Jiwon? I just had three different people shoved their hand up my damn vagina in the last hour alone while humming “not ready yet” like I’m a freaking pie in the oven all the while being display like a freaking 150 pounds piece of really shitty art made by someone with no artistic sense whatsoever for everyone to see. Do you really know?” Damn, Jiwon would be proud with how fast and powerful you had just gotten that sentence out in one single breath if he weren’t so scare, being married to a rapper really has it perk.

“I’m sorry. I’m here, hit me, scream at me all you want okay? But you gotta calm down baby... The doctor said getting upset isn’t good for little Y/n. What can I do?” Instinctively, just as he had all these years when the world becomes a little too much for you to handle, Jiwon pulls you into his arms, never mind your harsh words or that his left palm is now bleeding from how rough your hold on his hand were. He places a kiss on your sweaty forehead, with the good hand running through your matted hair. If Jiwon could be pregnant instead, he would. 

He had always been the one bugging you to get pregnant, although never quite mad, Jiwon had gotten short with you once before when you expressed your nonchalantness with having kids. He wants to take it all back now. How could he be so selfish, how could he make you carry a life just because he wants a mini Jiwon or mini Y/n when you weren’t ready. He had forgotten seeing Hanbin and his wife went through so much trials and tribulation with their twins, or how hard it was on Chanwoo’s wife when she had complication with their first born so he so selfishly blamed you for still not having someone to call him “dad”. What a screw up he is for blaming you, the only person that was willing to take him at his best and at his worst without ever questioning his intention. 

“Get me some water... as much ice as you can.” You whimper out and he nods furiously, not knowing how else to help. A heavy sigh left your lips just as his shadow bolts out the door behind him. You know how harsh all this was on him, and of all his fears but the pain had blinded you for the past few hours.

“Baby, here.” He rushes back to your side, thankful to see a more rested form of his wife smiling back. Lifting a few spoonful of cold salvation to your lips, he settles happily when you lean into him as you satisfyingly crunches on the ice.

“Jiwon... I’m sorry.” You mewl out, much to his surprise. 

“Whatever for, honey? You did nothing wrong.” Eyes widen, for the first time since arrival he was met with your tearful features even with the gut punches your body was preparing to welcome the baby are still rolling in with full force.

“I-I know all I’ve been doing is yell at you. First all I do is complain, now I just yell and hurt you. I don’t want you to think this is me now... I said it before, I’ll say it now. I’m happy to be able to welcome my child with you, our child. I know I don’t say it enough, or at all, but Kim Jiwon, you’re an amazing person.”

“Stop it, love. I’m far from perfect. I always expect this thing to be easy breezy, you know? I’ve seen Jinhwan hyung did it, then Yunhyeong hyung... Even Hanbin, and June, and the maknae. I just, I don’t know. I guess it’s not as easy when we do it ourselves, huh?” That strange chuckle, signature of your husband rings out so dearly and suddenly your heart is at peace. You snuggle further into his chest despite the strange position you both had taken on with the soon to be gone bump in between. “Like I said before, you’re the most beautiful person in this world and I thank God everyday for giving me you.” 

You must be looking like a rag doll after a tsunami but his words and those loving eyes just make you feel like a million dollars. His fingers find their way back to your face pushing away a few stray strand of hair as they would always do before he so tenderly presses a gentle kiss on your lips. Jiwon holds it there for what felt like eternity as he lets his heart and soul sear you with all his love, only parting way once the footfall could be heard leading to your room. 

Once more you experience what could only be describe as a frog prepared to get dissected during bio class, what’s with being prod at, poke, and examine. Another 4 excruciating hours and a few laps around the maternity ward later to loosen your muscles, you were prepped and primed for the main event. The world feels like such a blur, as if suddenly the Earth had decided to go on a race with its sibling planets. Blurs of people running in and out of the room, blurs of faces telling you to push, blurs of the incessant beeping of all the machineries, blurs of pain. In the blurry faded world flashing in front of your eyes, his face remains clear as day right beside you. Jiwon has his arms around you like he always had been when he walked you through rough spots in life. 

For God knows why, your memories rushes back to the day you had thought your journey with him was to end, back to the days of being young and being careless. You had gotten tired of waiting, angry at him for always leaving but too foolish to realize there were millions of other solutions before separating. “Let’s break up” you had said simply and watched as he said simply, “No.” Before you had realized what was going on, he already had his arms around you before repeating one more time, “No.” You were angry at first, the blatant disrespect he was showing by refusing to hear you but then you broke down crying in his arms and held him the tightest you’ve ever held anyone. “My naive girl, what make you think pushing me away will be the answer to your pain of never having me around? Did you think that parting way forever will help you get over how much you miss me? Because let me tell you right now, if you love me as I do you, that’s the stupidest thing you’ve ever come up with because i can’t even fathom how much it hurt not to have you in my life.” And he held you for the next hours as you both snuggling up on your old worn couch, then the rest of the night when you buried your head in his chest while listening to his sweet, sweet voice. “When you’re thirsty, you drink water. When you’re hungry, you eat. When you miss someone, you should be with them. I don’t get your ass backward logic, missy. Tell me right now, would you rather me leave right now, and I will if you do. I don’t want to force you into a relationship if you’re already decided you don’t need anymore.” Your response was to pull him closer and never let go.  Just like that night, Jiwon is right where he needed to be and he protects you in his arms even when he doubts that it will help, he holds you anyways. Through the exhaustion and through it all, you smile because you’re all each other got and simply, you’re better together as 3 and counting. 

Then the world stops. A single cry tears through the musty sweat filled air like the clearest bell and all either of you could hear was that cry. The weight of the world lifted off your shoulders when you see the smile on his face, a smile that said you had just been demoted to second favorite as the nurse hands over your bundle of joy. 

“She’s so perfect. God,  I said I wouldn’t cry. Look at me now.” Jiwon half guffaw half chokes on his own tears as he delicately places his lips on her forehead, finger gently caressing her fluffy cheeks. 

“She’s perfect, just like her dad.” You lean back, forgetting that stitches were being placed, that your lower half felt like it had been through a meat grinder. Watching Jiwon holding your sleepy baby close to his chest as he coos “Hi baby, I’m your dad”, you’d go through this again and again. There is nothing more precious in this world than bringing a new life into this world and nothing will surpass the joy of doing it with Jiwon. You’re sure the weeks to come will be both painful and exhausting but seeing the excitement in his eyes as he shows off your daughter to the boys, you know you’re in good hands.