#she'll probably have to say something like this to jack soon

[luveline]

hi can i request girl dad!aaron 🥺🥺 i am such a sucker for him, anything would be amazing thank you so much <3

hope this is okay!! —you have big news for your small family. 1.5k pregnant!mom!reader

When you first married his father, you weren't expecting Jack Hotchner to like you very much. Losing his mom so young, you wouldn't have blamed him for resenting you, or even hating you. You were like a stranger in his home. 

Things are different now. Jack lays in your lap with his head on your shoulder, and maybe he's a little too old for such a coddling cuddle, but who really cares? You love him and you love holding him, and if he wants some extra comfort tonight you're happy to give it. Plus, you have something you've been meaning to tell him.

“He doesn't have real headlights, did you know?” Jack asks. “They're just stickers.” 

You raise your brows at the car on screen. “No kidding.” You brush your fingers through his hair. He's blonde like his mom, though that blonde has turned brown the older he gets. 

“Race cars don't have headlights.”

“They don't need them,” you say. Jack smiles at you shyly and leans into your neck, clearly pleased. 

You're very, very glad that you ended up being someone he loved. It's a privilege to get to look after him, and to be his step mom. In the same way you're lucky to be Aaron's partner and Jane's mom, too. 

“Think dad's made dinner?” you ask. 

“No, he's probably just talking to Jane.” 

Yes, well. You can't blame him, nor would you want him to stop. He talks to Jane like she understands, and Jane, not even two years old, nearly brand new to the world, soaks him in. You can hear him if you strain, the dulcet cadence of his voice under the steady hum of the dishwasher. 

“That's okay, sweetheart, don't get upset,” he's saying, “it's okay. Come here, I've got you.” 

Jane starts to cry. You and Jack give one another the look, apprehensive in hoping it won't turn into a full blown melt down. 

“Honey?” Aaron calls. “Sorry, where did you put her other pacifier?” 

You kiss Jack's hair. “Sorry, bub. Wanna come with me?” 

Jack wants to stay and watch Cars. You wrap him in a throw blanket and make your way into the Hotchner kitchen, where Aaron rifles through the drawers and cabinets with Jane held snugly to his chest. “I know,” he says, “I know. I'll get it.” 

You nudge him aside. You only know where the spare pacifier is because you put away the wooden spoons last night and pushed it back. You fish for it, a ladybug made of glittery red plastic, and Jane's crying slows as soon as you pull it free. She grizzles while you rinse it, but she settles when you hand it over. 

“This is not the best, is it? The pacifiers?” you murmur. 

“She dropped her other one and it rolled under the oven. And no. Not ideal.” He pats her back gently. “As long as she stops before she gets her big teeth, she'll be okay.” 

“Do you think it's a comfort issue?” you ask. 

“No,” he says. You worry about stuff like this constantly, but he knows kids are more hardy, and he isn't worried. “Sorry for making you get up.” 

He hates when she cries; he may see his kids as a hardy bunch, but he takes their upset as a personal failure half the time. His concern for her overrides his concern for you, but in a few weeks that might change. You can't imagine him calling you to find something again when your stomach is round as a honeydew. 

You've been meaning to tell him about that, too. 

You're not secret-keeping immorally, he does want another baby, but you've been having a little bit of fun. He's gone on cases so often lately that he hasn't been able to keep track of you, or your doctor's appointments.

You watch him with Jane, and you think about him with Jack, and you know he's going to be happy. He's told you as much before. 

“My poor girl,” he says, covering the back of Jane's head with his hand and pulling her under his chin. He looks as fine as ever, tall, dark and handsome to a fault. Jane's lips smack as she sucks and digs her teary cheek into his chest. 

You can feel his gaze on you. “Is now a good time?” he asks. 

You shrug. “For what?” 

“To tell me what you're not telling me.” 

“Oh, busted,” you croon, aiming for his shoulder. 

You do as Jane had and press your cheek to his front, your eye forced shut. 

“What do you think it is?” you ask. 

He makes a strange noise. You can practically hear the possibilities for your secret running through his head. His birthday is vaguely soon, so that's what he'll settle on first. But Aaron likes to disregard the obvious as most people do, only circling back to it when there's no other lead to follow. 

“How big of a secret is it?” he asks, rubbing Jane's back diligently. She makes a happy sound, and for a moment he forgets his plight to kiss the top of her head. 

You speak quietly, carefully, because it is big, huge news. “The pamphlets say it’s about the size of a strawberry.” 

He puts his cheek to Jane's head softly, looking at you in confusion. A second, another, and his eyebrows start to relax, rise, a smile on his lips like it's too good to be true. “You are?” he asks in surprise.

Jack appears in the doorway with the throw blanket trailing behind him. “Y/N, when are you coming back to watch TV?” 

“Jack, lovely, come here. I have something to tell you,” you say. 

Aaron grabs your wrist. When you meet his eyes, he squeezes gently. “You're sure?” he asks. 

“The doctor seemed pretty certain, handsome.” You lower your voice as Jack comes to stand in front of you. “Are you happy?” 

“Happy about what?” 

You put your hand on your stomach cautiously, worried about Aaron and how quiet he's being, and if it's as okay to tell Jack as you'd thought, but that action is what gets him. “I love you,” he says quizzically, as though his being happy is totally dependent on the fact. “Of course I'm happy. This is the best secret you could've kept.” 

“About what?” Jack asks, patting your arm. 

You bend down just a bit to see his face properly. “It's a secret you can't tell anyone for a while, okay? The only people who can know for now are me, you, and dad.” 

“Can I tell Jane?” he asks. 

“Yeah, buddy, you can tell your sister,” Aaron says. 

You peer at him from the corner of your eye, both concerned and pleased to see the wetness ringing his waterline, and the tenderness with which he holds Jane close, his thumb rubbing little circles into her back. 

“I'm going to have another baby,” you say. 

Jack's jaw drops. “Right now?” 

“No, not right now! You still remember last time?” you ask with a laugh, taking his shoulders into your hands. 

“You were crying and shouting for dad to hold your hand.” He pokes your stomach. “So it's like Jane?” 

“Maybe one day, sweetheart. For now, it's just a tiny baby.” 

Jack wants to see your stomach. He's expecting a much bigger bump than you have to offer, but you explain that eventually it'll get bigger again, and he seems quite pleased. Aaron makes sure to give him a hug and ask him if he's okay, to which Jack says, “Yes, but can we have a brother this time?” 

You rub the soft top of your stomach. “I'll see what I can do, Jack.” 

Aaron commandeers your attention, kissing you more times than you can count. You don't think you've ever seen him this happy now the reality has truly set in, asking Jane in his murmur, “Do you want to be a big sister?” 

She gurgles around the pacifier, leaving drool in a line down his chest. 

“I know, honey. I'm excited too. Let's clean you up, mm? And make mommy a cup of hot cocoa…” He narrows his eyes at you. “Would you sit down?” 

“I'm only ten weeks, I'm fine.”

“She's keeping secrets from me, and now she won't do what I'm asking,” he says to Jane. “Can you believe it? Anyone would think mommy doesn't like me as much as she claims.” 

You kiss his cheek. “M'having your baby, Aaron, again.” 

“That is a compelling argument.” He wipes Jane's cheek. “What do you think? Should we forgive her?” Jane laughs. He smiles at you, lovesick. You're not sure who for. “I guess we're letting you get away with this one, sweetheart. But no more secrets.”

“None,” you promise. 

[zegrasdrysdale]

I LOVE HOW YOU WRITE!! if you have time vould you maybe do a jack hughes smut where reader wears the rival teams jersey to piss him off and its like rough??

its been rotting in my brain for forever 😭

[ bitter rivals ] j. hughes

paring : Jack Hughes x fem!reader

summary : just to make her boyfriend mad after a fight, (Y/N) wears a Flyers jersey to the Devils’ game against Philly in Newark … and she feels the consequences afterwards

warning(s) : smut ! rough sex, unprotected p in v sex, slight choking, hair pulling, possessiveness, pet names during sex. light angst

author’s note : hear me out … i was having a moment so i decided to tackle this request. not to mention i have been wanting to write something like this for a hot second so here we are. that’s how we got here so i hope y’all enjoy. i always have time to write some jack hughes smut too

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It's been nearly a week since their fight and (Y/N) hasn't heard from her boyfriend. Normally she wouldn't do something drastic since it's only been a week, but she feels like doing something drastic.

Instead of walking into the Prudential Center wearing a red 86 on her back, she wears an orange 11. She gets looks from a few Devils fans who know of her relationship with Jack, but she truly doesn't care. She knows will always be loyal to the boys in red and black despite trying to be petty.

After grabbing something to eat and drink, she heads down to her front row seats that she purposely bought just to make this point. She'll be right on the glass for Devils warmups in a few minutes.

Until then, she enjoys her chicken tenders and High Noon while fans begin to gather at the glass to get a close up look at their favorite players.

The Flyers come out first for warmups in their white away jerseys, then the Devils come out in their black alternate jerseys.

(Y/N) sticks out like a sore orange thumb in a sea of red, white, and black around her. She gets a couple of looks from the fans around her when she stands up. but it doesn't matter. She’s just trying to prove a point.

No one would blame her if they knew.

On the ice, she watches Luke skate up to his older brother. His eyes flicker in her direction. Luke leans into Jack’s ear and says something to him, who looks right at her. He has a look on his face that she has never seen before. He looks so angry.

When he starts to skate over to where she’s standing, Jesper intercepts him as soon as he sees where he’s going. He says something to Jack but Jack’s eyes never leave his girlfriend. She waves at him with a sly smirk on her face.

Mission accomplished. He saw her.

Jack slaps pucks at the net in obvious frustration or anger. She doesn’t know which it is at this point. She wouldn’t be surprised at all if he takes a few penalties during the game.

If he’s angry now, it’s just gonna fester for the next few hours. She’s probably screwed but it’ll be worth it in the end.

The Flyers jersey doesn’t deter her from cheering every time the Devils score a goal.

When Erik Haula nets his third goal of the night, she makes sure she throws the beanie she’s wearing onto the ice. Technically it wasn’t even her beanie. Jack left it at her apartment and never asked for it back so she stole it for the game tonight.

Throughout the game, she does notice that Jack glances at her a handful of times with a look of fury darkening his usually bright blue eyes. He sends glares at her when she cheers for the one goal he scored in the third period that secured the Devils the win.

An angry Jack has never scared her, but his anger has never been directed at her like it is right now. She’s either in for the worst night of her life after the horn blares when the game ends, or she won’t be able to walk tomorrow.

Like she usually does after a game, she meets up with the other wives and girlfriends in a lounge by the locker room. Kristen Haula is the first one to approach her.

“What’s with the Flyers jersey?” she questions.

“Needed to prove a point to Jack,” (Y/N) replies. “That’s all. I’m not jumping ship or anything. We just had a fight and he hasn’t spoken to me in like a week. I proved my point so next game I’ll be back in a Devils jersey.”

Before Kristen can reply, Jack marches through the doors and immediately scans the room. His hair is still dripping from his postgame shower and he looks very disheveled, like he rushed to get ready.

His eyes land on her and she presses her lips into a line. Jack takes large strides over to her so it doesn’t take him very long to cross the room.

“What the fuck is this?” he asks. “A Flyers jersey? A Travis Konecny jersey? Seriously?"

Kristen smiles and silently walks away while (Y/N)’s eyes remain on Jack. “What? You don’t like my new jersey?” she asks with innocence in her voice.

He bites his bottom lip as he thinks about his response. She gives him the smallest of smiles while the gears in his head turn. "I want you to take it off," Jack tells her.

"Oh, Jacky," she sighs. "You wouldn't want me to do that if you knew what I wasn't wearing underneath this jersey."

She watches his eyes darken. "Let's go," he says to her. "We're going to my apartment right now."

Her jaw drops and Jack grabs her wrist. "Who said I wanna go anywhere with you?" she asks as she tries to wrench her wrist out of his grasp. "You haven't talked to me in nearly a week, Jack."

Jack turns and faces her. "Wonder why," is all he says. She raises her eyebrows at him. "Let's go, (Y/N). We can talk at my apartment."

This time, she lets herself get pulled out of the Prudential Center and into Jack's car. Luckily she caught an Uber to the arena. A very small part of her figured she would be leaving with her boyfriend after the game.

Neither of them speak as Jack drives from the arena to his Hoboken apartment. Her eyes are on the passing buildings and cars. She feels Jack's hand on her thigh at one point but she doesn't react to it.

Yes, she was teasing him with the "if you knew what I wasn't wearing" comment. Yes, she hopes they'll fall into bed. Falling into bed isn't happening until they talk. She wants to know why Jack hasn't talked to her in five days before his dick comes anywhere near her.

It's a silent car ride and a silent ride up the elevator to Jack's place. She can still feel how annoyed Jack is by the fact that she wore the opposing team's jersey and still cheered for the Devils. She's annoyed too. She's annoyed because she had to wear the opposing team's jersey just to get his attention.

Jack opens the door to his apartment and walks inside. She follows him as he throws his suit jacket onto a coat hanger by the door. She shuts the door behind her and watches Jack unbutton the first few buttons of his shirt.

"Why?" she asks before he turns around. "Why did it take me wearing a Flyers jersey before I got your attention?"

He runs his fingers through his hair before he turns to face her. "I was thinking," he admits to her. "I was worried that I'd say something that I'd regret. I didn't want to hurt you, so I waited and actually took some time to think."

"Think about what?"

"Think about us," he softly tells her. "I wasn't sure if I was ready to find out if you actually meant what you said during our fight."

Her words come rushing back to her.

I don't know if I'm ready for this kind of life is what she had said to him.

"What did you think I meant by those words?" she asks.

"That you weren't ready for a life with me," he replies.

Jack is a beautiful man, but sometimes the smarts aren't there. Too many pucks to the head from Luke and Quinn.

"Jack, I meant that I didn't think I was ready to be an NHL wife," she tells him. "Of course I'm ready for a life with you, but it's everything that comes along with you. The spotlight, the eyes. I wasn't sure if I was ready for that."

The look that forms on Jack's face could make (Y/N) laugh. His eyebrows are raised and his mouth forms a little 'o'. She presses her lips into a line to suppress a smile. "I am such a dumbass," he says after he processes what she said. "Jesus Christ."

She wraps her arms around his neck and finally lets out a laugh. "You're my dumbass though."

When she leans in to kiss him, Jack pushes her away.

"Nuh uh," he says when she looks up at him. "I am absolutely not kissing you while you have that ugly ass jersey on. Not happening, (Y/N)."

Her eyes fall to the Flyers logo on her chest like she just remembered that she has the jersey on.

She reaches down between them and grabs the bottom of the jersey. Slowly, she pulls the fabric over her head to slowly reveal to Jack that she's not wearing anything underneath the jersey.

When the jersey is over her head, her eyes land on Jack. His eyes are wide while he looks her up and down. “Fuck, (Y/N),” he groans. “You really know how to piss a guy off. Not only are you wearing a Flyers jersey, but you didn’t even wear anything underneath.”

“Had to get your attention somewhere, Jacky,” she tells him as she gets up onto her tiptoes to attach her lips to his neck. “Glad it worked.”

Jack leans down and picks her up by the back of her legs. She wraps herself around him and keeps kissing and nosing at the skin on his neck as he walks somewhere in the apartment.

When he drops her on the couch, (Y/N) looks up at Jack and asks, “What about Luke?”

“What about him?” Jack settles comfortably between her knees.

“Won’t he be home soon?”

“Told him to find somewhere else to stay unless he wanted to see something that would scar him for life,” Jack tells her. “He told me that he’ll be at Dawson’s for the night. Now let me show you what happens when you decide to wear a jersey other than mine to a game.”

Yeah. She’s totally fucked. Literally and figuratively.

Jack ravishes her lips as soon as the last word leaves his mouth. A soft moan comes from her throat before she can stop it. One of his hands cups one of her bare breasts and the other cups her jaw. She tries to roll her hips against his to get some friction on her core, but he quickly puts a stop to that.

“I don’t think so,” Jack mumbles against her lips as he pins her hips to the cushion beneath her. “Only good girls get to come quickly tonight. You weren’t a good girl with the stunt you pulled.”

“Guess you didn’t like my new jersey,” she gasps as her boyfriend attaches his lips to the sensitive skin on her neck. “Or was it the fact that there was a different name on my back?”

The nip she gets is the answer she was looking for. Jack was jealous that another player’s name was on her back instead of his. She revels in the realization since it has been five days and it took wearing the jersey for him to talk to her.

He slowly begins to kiss down her neck and chest. He makes sure to give both breasts some attention before moving further down her belly.

Her fingers find a home in his now dry hair. She adores how soft his hair feels when it has just dried after a shower.

Jack’s fingers hook in the waistband of the leggings she has on. He slowly pulls the thin fabric off her body and kisses her hipbone when it’s exposed. She sighs as her boyfriend strips her of her pants. She kicks her sneakers off so Jack can pull them completely off of her.

She lets her legs fall open while Jack throws the leggings somewhere on the floor. Her soaked underwear is on full display for him. She watches his tongue dart out at his view.

“Touch me before I touch myself, Jack,” she orders him.

He goes back to hovering over her. A hand lightly wraps around her throat and she looks up at him in surprise. “You will do no such thing if you want to come tonight,” he retorts.

(Y/N) bites her lip at his words. She can’t remember the last time he spoke to her like this, but she is loving every second of it.

His other hand snakes between them and into the thin fabric of her underwear. A gasp comes from her lips as his fingers easily run through her slick folds. She wraps her hands around his arm to keep herself present.

“Jack,” she whines.

He cups her pussy and she has to stifle a moan. “Who does this belong to?” he asks.

“You, baby,” (Y/N) quickly tells him. “It’s all yours. I’m all yours.”

Jack leans down and presses soft kisses to her cheek and jaw. “Good girl.” His words shoot straight down to her already pulsing core.

Without warning, Jack stands up and pulls her up. He gets her on her knees and leans her against the back of the couch with her chest pressed against the cushions. In the reflection of the glass cabinet that’s behind the couch, she can see Jack undressing behind her.

He twirls her hair into a makeshift pony and gets on his knees behind her. Jack’s lips are on her neck right under her ear. “Tell me who fucks you until you can’t speak,” he whispers.

His low voice causes the knot that has formed in her belly to tighten.

“You do, Jack,” she replies. Jack pulls on the makeshift pony until she’s looking straight up at the ceiling. A soft moan passes her lips. “You fuck me so good. Only you.”

“Yeah, I do,” Jack mumbles as he presses her into the cushions beneath her. He doesn’t release the pony.

With one hand, he manages to get her underwear off of her and onto the floor with both of their clothes. She feels his hard dick between her legs and had to resist the urge to grind against it.

Her legs are practically shaking as she waits for release.

He leans over her and kisses the back of her neck for a second before he slams into her. She cries out in surprise because that was the last thing she expected to happen.

“Fuck, Jack,” she breathes out as he lets her adjust to him. “Give a girl a little warning before you destroy her.”

She feels him smile and mumble, “We’ll see.”

This boy is going to be the death of her.

A minute passes before Jack begins to rock his hips into her. She bites her lip to try and keep herself from making an embarrassing noise.

Eventually, she gives up because she’s worried she’ll make her lip bleed with how hard she’s biting down on it.

(Y/N) begins to meet Jack’s hips with every thrusts. She lets out soft moans and whines every time they meet. He lifts one of her legs up onto the back of the couch so he can get a new angle on her.

She has to lean against Jack’s chest as he continues to fuck into her at the new angle. “This pussy was made for me,” Jack pants into her ear. He wraps his arms around her to keep her steady. “Feels so good around me.”

She wants to say something, but she’s so overwhelmed with pleasure that she can’t form any. All she does is let out a soft whine in reply.

“See? No one else can fuck you speechless like I can.”

The knot in the bottom of her belly tightens. She has to force herself to form words. “Jacky,” she whines. “Wanna come. Been a good girl for you. Please.”

Jack kisses the swell of her ear and grasps her breasts. “You only wear my name, baby,” he pants in her ear. “My number on your back. No one else’s.”

“No one else’s,” she agrees. “Can I come? Please?”

He hums and she clenches around him as soon as she has his permission. She loses her vision for a moment as she comes on Jack’s cock. His name echoes throughout the apartment as she hits her high.

She had no idea that Jack could be like this. Maybe she’ll have to mess with him if she’s going to see this side of her boyfriend. She’s pretty sure that she’s never had an orgasm this intense in her entire life.

Without realizing because of how hard her orgasm hit her, Jack comes inside of her and slouches against her when he comes down from his own high.

When she comes to, she’s lying on her back on the couch and Jack is wiping her with a wet cloth. His boxers are on the lower half of his lower body and she pouts.

“Was that okay?” Jack asks before she can say anything. “I might’ve gotten a little carried away.”

She shakes her head and says, “It was perfect. It was more than okay. You were jealous.”

Jack laughs and shakes his head. “Maybe a little,” he admits. “I don’t like it when you wear other players’ jerseys.”

“Maybe talk to me next time and I won’t have to,” she teases. Jack rolls his eyes. “Anyway, can we go to bed? I wanna get your dick in my mouth and apologize in my own way.”

She’s surprised with how quickly Jack picks her up and whisks her off to his bedroom after that.

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[thewertsearch]

@manorinthewoods asked: Vriska and Eridan have now killed one person each. Tavros and Feferi's respective moons have been destroyed; as such, they cannot be revived via dream selves or the moon-crypt slabs. What do you think will happen now? ~LOSS (18/5/24) @manorinthewoods asked: Welcome to Murderstuck, aka Homestuck's version of Canaan House. Who do you think's going to survive this? ~LOSS (22/5/24) Anonymous asked: tavros and feferi are D----EAD! do you think they'll stay dead? you've already stated your opinion that there are death flags like crazy all over vriska, so do you think anyone else will die? if so, who? Anonymous asked: Now that the bodies have started to hit the floor, what's your prediction for who's gonna survive to meet the humans?

I'm actually doing to do something a little different this time, and analyze the situation primarily from an author's perspective, rather than an in-universe one. I had a lot of fun doing that with yesterday's Kanaya post, so I want to try it again.

Let's enumerate the remaining trolls, in ascending order of how likely I think they are to kick the bucket (😳) during Murderstuck.

There's no chance whatsoever that Sollux will die. His Doom prophecy is fulfilled, and if he were to die a third time, it would break his long-established duality theme. Plus, he'd have predicted it, and would have been complaining about it since Hivebent. He's fine.

Death flag score: 0/10.

We just got Aradia back. She's not even involved in Murderstuck, seemingly travelling to the Furthest Ring after being resurrected, so none of the murderers can touch her anyway.

Aradia is a powerful time manipulator who can freeze even the most dangerous enemies. It would take a lot more than Eridan and Gamzee to defeat someone who can stalemate Perfect Jack, and I predict that she'll survive the rest of the Act with ease.

Plus, killing her again so soon would feel really cheap. Been there, done that.

Death flag score = 0.5/10

Karkat and Terezi are too important to die.

This doesn't always guarantee a character's survival - A Song of Ice and Fire comes to mind - but ASOIAF kind of proves my point, doesn't it? Martin can throw all the Red Weddings he likes at us, but everyone still kind of knows that the really important characters aren't going to die until their arcs are complete. If A Dream of Spring ever actually comes out, Daenerys will still be around, and you can take that to the bank.

So no, I don't think Karkat and Terezi will be going anywhere. Now that Kanaya appears to be dead, they're undeniably the most important trolls remaining, alongside Vriska. And we'll get to Vriska.

Death flag score: 1/10.

I know it's weird to predict that an already deceased character won't die, but I wrote an entire post last night about why I believe this to be the case.

tl;dr: it doesn't make narrative sense for Kanaya to stay dead.

Death flag score: 2/10.

Now, we're onto the characters who I think might actually die.

Gamzee's still alive at the end of the countdown, so he'll at least survive the next couple of hours.

Certainly, his position seems rather precarious. His stated intent to wipe out the entire Veil will make him a lot of enemies very quickly - and based on the image above, he clearly gets into some sort of trouble. That scratch almost looks like it could be the work of Jack's sword.

However, I have a hard time believing the Most Important Character In Homestuck is going to die less than halfway through Homestuck. He's been saying all sorts of cryptic nonsense lately, and he strikes me as someone whose role in the story will expand even more than it already has. Gamzee is the one character on this list we know will stay relevant for the entire comic.

I don't think he's going to achieve his murder mission, of course. I think he'll probably be 'defeated' somehow, and expelled from the Veil by the surviving trolls, only to pop up again sometime later. There's still a chance that he'll be killed - but if he is, I'm 100% sure that he'll return in some form. Gamzeesprite would be even worse than Calsprite, in my opinion.

Death flag score: 3/10.

Yes, I still believe Vriska will die - but I don't know if she'll die in Murderstuck.

Scratch positioned her as someone who will perpetuate a monumental, large-scale mistake, and I don't think there's anything she could do on the Veil that fits the bill.

However, Vriska is more imaginative than I am. She could easily pull a trick out from up her sleeve that I didn't see coming - some terrible, horrible idea that earns all of Scratch's foreshadowing in one fell swoop. Vriska is known for her Incidents, and you never know when the next one is on the horizon.

Death flag score: 4/10.

There's not a lot tying Equius and Nepeta to the Veil, is there?

They don't have strong relationships any of the remaining trolls, and even among the B-team, they've barely had any prominence since we've left Alternia. Killing one or both of them would up the stakes of Murderstuck without introducing the narrative issues that, say, a dead Karkat would cause.

Plus, if one of them dies, then the other would immediately gain an incredibly strong motivation, and become a more prominent character overnight. I already like Nepeta - but a heartbroken, vengeful Nepeta hunting Eridan down across time and space? That's a fucking arc.

They could also both die, and return to the story from another direction. It hasn't escaped my notice that almost all the 'important' trolls are Prospit Dreamers, and the two Furthest Ring explorers are Derse girls. I've been wondering for a while now if the solution to the Veil's bloated cast is to split the trolls back into the Red and Blue Teams, with the Red Team joining the kids outside the session, and the Blue Team joining Aradia in the Ring for some secondary mission. I guess that implies Tavros will be resurrected, but there do seem to be hints that that might happen.

I don't want either of these two to die, but... well, killing them would raise a lot of interesting possibilities.

Death flag score (both of them together): 6/10

Death flag score (one of them) : 7.5/10.

Eridan is screwed.

Neither the story nor the trolls can allow him to ally with Jack and lead him to the Veil, and they'll do anything they can to stop him. I don't think anyone's inclined to show him mercy, either - Kanaya and Feferi were very popular.

I don't really see any way out for him. He has no allies, he can't Hopesplode everyone at once, and he's never shown himself to be particularly resourceful. I think if there's one troll practically guaranteed to be Murderstucked, it's him.

Death flag score: 9/10.

[peachhcs]

will bringing sam to something to bc for like a hockey thing and she’s his date and he’s proudly walking around with her on his arm

hockey formal

hughes!sister x will smith au (samy + will)

samy's in boston for will's hockey formal which means she finally meets all of his teammates that hear so much about her!

2.8k words

i kind of strayed off the path of what you requested, but i hope you like it!! this was so cutie to write, so pls send more in if y'all have any more requests :) (btw i finally used the actual names of the other hockey players on the team LMAO. everyone but connor is a guy on the bc hockey team) (so, the pics are gonna look big if ur on a computer but on mobile it’s fine LOL) (p.s.s my plan is to hopefully post every like 2 days! :) depending on my schoolwork load)

au masterlist

will's hands were around his phone as soon as he was done in the shower. the blonde didn't even take the time to change into clothes as he tapped away and stalked where samy's plane currently was. a grin curled onto his lips seeing her exactly thirty minutes away from the airport.

"what's got you so smiley?" eamon whacked his own towel against will's shoulder as he passed by the stall.

"girlfriend's coming to town," gabe answered with a smirk on his lips before will could even say a word. 

"ooh, the girlfriend, huh? has she been to boston yet?" eamon wondered with his own smile.

"is that the same girl who gave you those wicked hickeys a few weeks back?" mike poked his head into the conversation. his words had will blushing to the tips of his ears.

"yup, that's the one," ryan filled in as he leaned back into his stall.

"you mean to tell me hughes is coming here?" now connor joined the group and half the team in the locker room listened in while gaining knowledge of the star freshman's plans this weekend.

"she'll be at the formal tomorrow," will informed, finally throwing a t-shirt over his head. some of the guys let out oohs and ahhs at that information.

"we finally get to meet little hughesy??" colby exclaimed making the other boys chuckle.

"just don't be too weird, okay? do not bring up anything we talk about in here to her, promise?" will eyed his teammates seriously knowing how they got around the girlfriends. they were always sharing unwanted and lousy information that definitely did not need to get shared aloud.

"what? don't want her knowing we know how many times you guys have done it?" aidan teased earning hoots and hollers from the other juniors and seniors.

will's poor blush got even worse under the commotion. he saw ryan and gabe snickering to one another while sending the boy knowing looks. some teammates they were. 

"alright, shut up. just be normal if that's even possible for some of you," the freshman rolled his eyes, quickly disappearing from everyone to finish dressing himself.

"can't promise anything, smitty! get a few drinks in us and we're saying anything," jack called.

all will did was roll his eyes. he knew samy was used to hockey players and their antics, but he still didn't want his entire team making a fool of themselves in front of her. he wanted her to like them and them to like her. will was very big on gaining people's approval—especially samy. 

—

gabe and ryan happily tagged along to the airport with will. if the blonde didn't know any better, they were probably just as excited—maybe more—to see samy. something in will's heart warmed though knowing his linemates were so close with one of the people he cared the most about. he knew how much the two missed being in michigan and all of ellen's delicious homemade meals when they visited on the weekends. all of them were counting down the days they were all together again at the lake house.

the three were bouncing on their heels waiting by the gate while watching everyone unload from the plane. with them being so tall, they were able to see over most people's heads as they searched for samy's familiar mop of brown curls.

"i see her!" ryan exclaimed and the other spotted her also searching for them through the sea of people.

will began pushing his way forward to meet her in the middle. he felt like a little kid on christmas with how big his smile was and how tightly he embraced the girl when they finally met in the middle. his hug was so tight samy's feet lifted off the ground a little in a small spin.

"hey willie," samy beamed into his shoulder.

"hi pretty girl, missed you," the boy mumbled back, reluctantly letting her go for a moment. the girl's eyes spotted gabe and ryan hanging back, so she quickly jumped towards them.

"aw, my two favorites came to get me too," samy giggled as they both wrapped their arms around her shorter frame.

"good to see you too, hughesy. been a while," ryan chuckled.

"two favorites?" will cleared his throat, raising his eyebrow.

"obviously you're the first," the girl chuckled, tugging her arm back around her boyfriend after hugging ryan and gabe. the boy grinned as he basically smushed samy into his side. 

"someone's jealous,," gabe teased which only earned him a harsh glare from his friend. 

"you hungry at all? thinking about grabbing lunch with aram and drew back on campus," ryan wondered as the four made their way back down to baggage claim. 

"is that even a question? of course i'm hungry," samy beamed making the guys laugh. 

ryan and gabe helped grab samy's suitcase while catching up about soccer and school. will hung back, gladly letting his linemates talk since he's heard it all already from their nightly facetime calls. the smiles on ryan and gabe's faces were enough to tell will how much they enjoyed being around samy. it was something the blonde worried about when he first introduced them two years ago, but he should've known there was nothing to worry about. 

obviously samy got shotgun in will's car, so the guys stuffed themselves into the backseats. samy excitedly told them about her spring season while they chimed in with small tidbits from hockey. 

"did smitty tell you all the guys on the team are excited to meet you tomorrow?" ryan wondered. 

"they are?" samy giggled to herself while both boys nodded.

"you should've heard them in the locker room earlier," gabe grinned while will eyed him through the rearview mirror. 

"you're kind of a big deal to them i guess," will mumbled a bit shyly. his ears turned a slight pink thinking back to their teasing remarks. 

"so i've heard. i can't wait to meet them," the brunette chuckled. 

lunch with the six of them felt like old times back in michigan. somethimg about being all together and laughing like they hadn't been apart the last few months brought a sense of comfort and nostalgia knowing that in a few years they really weren't going to be together like that. 

samy and will retreated back to his dorm afterwards to spend some much needed alone time together before tomorrow. the girl grinned when her eyes caught sight of will's new wall decorations as soon as she stepped into the room. 

"aw, you two took my suggestions," she beamed and glanced over at gabe's side too. 

samy's heart warmed seeing so many pictures of her on will's side. he had three framed photos and probably 10-15 mixed into the photo collage on his wall. a smile crept onto the blonde's lips watching his girlfriend inspect every aspect of his side since she last visited. 

"this one's my favorite," he pointed to one of the many photos in the collage. 

samy ws laughing at something whoever took the photo said, but will's eyes had never left her. the gaze in his eyes said a lot more than words could. 

"wait, i didn't even know this picture existed. when was that?" the girl wondered, jumping onto will's bed to get a better look.

"like last summer?" the boy shrugged some. 

"i didn't even realize you were looking at me," samy giggled. 

"i know. that's why i like it," her eyes flicked to will's and that same stare from the photo was in his eyes. a small blush painted her cheeks as she quickly looked away before he noticed. 

"it was nice seeing the guys. i missed them," samy changed the subject as she sunk further into will's bed. 

"they were really excited to see you. they really miss michigan. i do too," the boy kicked his shoes off to join her. his words softened out samy's expression. 

"best two years ever having you guys so close by. i can't wait for summer," her voice dropped a little knowing how far off summer was still. 

will's arm curled around her waist to bringing her into him. "me neither. this long distance sucks, but i'm glad you're here. tomorrow's gonna be fun," his fingers carefully brushed some of her hair away from her face. 

a teasing smile grew on samy's lips, "how bad are they gonna chirp at you?" she knew all too well about his teammates constant teasing. 

"hopefully not too bad. i told them to cool it," will mumbled with an embarrassing blush that samy adored nonetheless. 

the two spent the rest of the afternoon in each other's arms after two long months apart. gabe came back later that night to the sight of them sound asleep and some random movie playing off of will's computer. the dark-haired boy quickly snapped a photo before shutting will's laptop and placing it somewhere safe. he quickly sent the photo to the freshman group chat, a smirk on his lips as he got himself ready for bed. 

—

will stood in front of the full length mirror getting his tie ready while samy got herself ready in the bathroom. he'd be lying if he said he wasn't just a little nervous for tonight. the hockey player knew his teammates would like her—they literally fangirl over her—he was just afraid they'd become too much or something. 

gabe threw his suit jacket over his shoulders while trying to look over will in the mirror. "dude, you're hogging the mirror," the dark-haired boy complained. 

"i'm almost done," will mumbled, fidgeting with his collar now. 

"go look at yourself next to your girlfriend in the bathroom," gabe shoved will out of the way. the blonde stumbled sideways, catching himself on the door. 

"dude," the blonde glared at him. 

"what? there's a bathroom for a reason," gabe shrugged, seemingly unbothered by pushing his friend out of the way. 

will rolled his eyes before gently knocking on the bathroom door. "yeah?" samy asked. 

"can i come in? gabe's kicking me away from our mirror," will wondered. he heard samy laugh and then a yes, so he carefully pushed the door open. 

the sight in front of him made the boy stop in his tracks. samy leaned over the counter trying to apply mascara and her dress was one will hadn't seen before. the material was satin or something because it shined in the light and hugged all of the right places. blue was most definitely samy's color. 

"like what you see?" the brunette smirked. she caught will's wandering eyes through the mirror, finally turning to him once she had her mascara on. 

pink colored will's skin from his neck to his ears. "you look beautiful," he mumbled, slowly stepping further into the bathroom and letting the door close a bit. 

"you don't look bad yourself," samy smiled at his all black suit and tie look. 

will stepped forward even more so his one arm could snake around samy's waist. he pulled her into his chest while his eyes shamelessly dropped down to her chest area and back up. "i can't believe you're mine," he nearly whispered making the girl chuckle. 

"you're sweet. i think i'm almost ready," samy's hands brushed back some of will's unruly curls. he flushed under her touch and brought her to his lips before he let her go. 

their kiss was filled with a lot of love. will's grasp on her waist kept her in place, kissing her deeper which allowed him to push his tongue into her mouth. samy's hands toyed with the hair on the nape of his neck, indulging in her boyfriend's slight neediness before she needed to finish getting ready. his boyish instincts started taking over as his other hand began sliding down past her waist. 

before he could reach her butt, samy pulled herself away. "i gotta finish getting ready. don't wanna be late," she giggled. 

will let out a small groan in protest, "you're annoying." 

"maybe." 

samy turned back to the sink, eyeing her makeup scattered across the counter. will's eyes did one last once-over of his girlfriend before tearing his eyes away and doing his finishing touches. another five minutes went by and the couple was finally ready. gabe looked up from his bed, smiling at the two.

"finally. scared i'd have to walk in there myself," he joked. 

will rolled his eyes while samy just chuckled. the three headed out of the dorm where they met ryan, drew, aram, and will vote downstairs to drive over together. the seven exchanged their hello's before dividing everyone up between will, drew, and ryan's cars. gabe stuck himself with will and samy, so the three continued out to the parking lot. 

samy smiled when will opened her door for her. 

"so charming," gabe mumbled as he climbed into the back. 

"wish he did that for me," ryan laughed as he walked by. 

poor will knew he wasn't going to escape the chirping all weekend, especially tonight. the drive into downtown stayed uneventful with minimal comments from gabe. they pulled into what looked like a very fancy bar in the heart of the city. samy hooked her arm around will's as the three walked in. a lot of the upperclassmen were already there mingling and their attention was caught when samy and will walked in. 

"yo, smitty!" aidan exclaimed, running around the bar to the couple. 

"what's up, hreschuck," will grinned. 

"you must be samy. we've heard a lot about you," aidan turned to the girl beside his teammate. 

"it's good to meet you," the two exchanged a friendly hug before the older player went to greet gabe. 

"it's her! it's little hughesy!" connor jumped up, running to hug samy. 

"connor miller! it's been forever since i saw you," the brunette laughed. she remembered connor playing with luke in the ntdp before they headed off to separate schools. 

"i know! when i heard you were smitty's girl i just couldn't believe it. how's your brothers?" the older boy wondered. 

"they're good. quinn's in van. jack and luke are in jersey. i'm the only one left in michigan," samy chuckled a little. 

"god, i can't believe moosey's in jersey. i can't believe you're old enough to be in college. you play soccer right?" 

will lingered beside samy while the smile on his lips grew. he never put two and two together that samy would know some of these guys through her brothers. he loved seeing her eyes so bright talking to connor about her brothers and soccer knowing she'd talk nonstop about them at any chance she got. maybe he wouldn't get chirped at as much as he thought. 

just as will thought that, colby and mike bounced over to where the couple was. "aw, she really does exist," colby cut into the conversation causing will's face to flush. 

"i'm colby. that's mike. we've heard a lot about you being smitty's girl," colby continued as he held his hand out. 

"it's nice to finally meet you guys," samy laughed, shaking their hands. 

"don't pay much mind to them. colby's going a little crazy tonight since he's graduating in a few months," connor laughed. 

"can do whatever i want and they won't kick me off the team," the older guy shrugged. 

"sometimes we thought smitty was lying about dating you," mike chimed in. 

"yeah, sometimes i don't believe it either," samy joined into their teasing. her gaze slid towards her boyfriend still beside her who blushed hard. 

"i mean he definitely picked a good one," colby nodded. 

"why don't you guys get some drinks and food before the other guys eat it all," connor laughed, pushing samy and will further into the bar and pretty much saving them from more of mike and colby's annoying remarks. 

"jesus, sorry about them," will mumbled when they were out of ear shot. 

"don't apologize. i thought it was funny," samy shook her head with a smile. 

"they don't know how to shut up ever," the blonde rolled his eyes. 

"you forget i'm used to it after growing up with three brothers who have hockey friends of their own," the girl giggled making will flush. 

"i know. i know. thanks for coming again," will placed a chaste kiss to her lips. 

samt stuck to will's side for most of the night, but she enjoyed seeing him in his comfort zone. all of the guys on the team were so close with one another. the upperclassmen treated the underclassmen like brothers despite the slight chirping. she could tell how much will loved it and how much he fit in with them. 

even though her boyfriend did most of the talking, she was glad to be at his side in a pretty dress for the night supporting him in what he loved the most. 

[taylor-on-your-dash]

WRITING OF FOLKLORE & EVERMORE TIMELINE

“I used to put all these parameters on myself like, ‘How will this song sound in a stadium? How will this song sound on radio?’ If you take away all the parameters, what do you make? And I guess the answer is... folklore.”

December 18, 2019: Taylor records my tears ricochet. On folklore: long pond sessions, she confirms that my tears ricochet was the first song written for TS8 and she knew right away that it would take the 5th spot on the track list.

“I found myself being very triggered by any stories, movies, or narratives revolving around divorce, which felt weird because I haven't experienced it directly. There's no reason it should cause me so much pain, but all of a sudden it felt like something I had been through. I think that happens any time you've been in a 15-year relationship and it ends in a messy, upsetting way. So I wrote "My Tears Ricochet" and I was using a lot of imagery that I had conjured up while comparing a relationship ending to when people end an actual marriage. All of a sudden this person that you trusted more than anyone in the world is the person that can hurt you the worst. Then all of a sudden the things that you have been through together, hurt. All of a sudden, the person who was your best friend is now your biggest nemesis, etc. etc. etc. I think I wrote some of the first lyrics to that song after watching Marriage Story and hearing about when marriages go wrong and end in such a catastrophic way. So these songs are in some ways imaginary, in some ways not, and in some ways both. It’s definitely one of the saddest songs on the album. Picking a ‘Track Five’ is sort of a pressurized decision but I knew from day one this was probably going to be it. It’s a song about karma, about greed, about how somebody could be your best friend and your companion and your most trusted person in your life and then they could go and become your worst enemy who knows how to hurt you because they were once your most trusted person. Writing this song, it kind of occurred to me that in all of the superhero stories the hero’s greatest nemesis is the villain that used to be his best friend. When you think about that, you think about how there’s this beautiful moment in the beginning of a friendship where these people have no idea that one day, they’ll hate each other and try to take each other out. I mean, that’s really sad and terrible.”

March 5-12, 2020: Band rehearsals for Lover Fest. The band rehearsed 32 songs and Taylor sings on a few.

March 11, 2020: Taylor lands in LA. She'll stay there for the whole lockdown until May 22nd.

March 19, 2020: The state of California issue a stay-at-home order. The lockdown starts. During the Eras Tour, Taylor says that she started writing songs with Jack soon after. It's possible that illicit affairs and august were two of the first songs, as Taylor confirmed that august was the first song she wrote for the Love Triangle. This first version of august doesn't include the bridge.

[Taylor about illicit affairs] This was the first album that I’ve ever let go of that need to be 100 percent autobiographical because I think I needed to do that. I felt like fans needed to hear a 'stripped from the headlines' account of my life and it actually ended up being a bit confining. Because there’s so much more to writing songs than just what you’re feeling and your singular storyline. And I think this was spurred on by the fact that I was watching movies every day, I was reading books every day, I was thinking about other people every day. I was kind of outside my own, personal stuff. I think that’s been my favorite thing about this album: that it’s allowed to exist on its own merit without it just being, ‘Oh, people are listening to this because it tells them something that they could read in a tabloid’. It feels like a completely different experience.

[Taylor about august] In my head, I’ve been calling the girl from ‘august’ either Augusta or Augustine. What happened in my head was: ‘cardigan’ is Betty’s perspective from 20 or 30 years later, looking back on this love that was this tumultuous thing. I think Betty and James ended up together. So in my head, she ends up with him but he really put her through it. ‘august’ was obviously about the girl that James had this summer with. She seems like she’s a bad girl, but really she’s not. She’s a really sensitive person who fell for him and she was trying to seem cool and like she didn’t care because that’s what girls have to do. And she was trying to let him think that she didn’t care, but she did and she thought they had something very real. And then he goes back to Betty. So the idea that there is some bad, villain girl in any type of situation who ‘takes your man’ is a total myth because that’s not usually the case at all. Everybody has feelings and wants to be seen and loved. And Augustine…that’s all she wanted.

[Taylor] I was really excited about "August slipped away into a moment of time/August sipped away like a bottle of wine." That was a song where Jack sent me the instrumental and I wrote the song pretty much on the spot; it just was an intuitive thing. And that was actually the first song that I wrote of the "Betty" triangle. So the Betty songs are "August," "Cardigan," and "Betty." "August" was actually the first one, which is strange because it's the song from the other girl's perspective. It would be safe to assume that "Cardigan" would be first, but it wasn't. It was very strange how it happened, but it kind of pieced together one song at a time, starting with "August," where I kind of wanted to explore the element of This is from the perspective of a girl who was having her first brush with love. And then all of a sudden she's treated like she's the other girl, because there was another situation that had already been in place, but "August" girl thought she was really falling in love. It kind of explores the idea of the undefined relationship. As humans, we're all encouraged to just be cool and just let it happen, and don't ask what the relationship is—Are we exclusive? But if you are chill about it, especially when you're young, you learn the very hard lesson that if you don't define something, oftentimes they can gaslight you into thinking it was nothing at all, and that it never happened. And how do you mourn the loss of something once it ends, if you're being made to believe that it never happened at all?

Taylor had previously written down the phrase ‘Meet me behind the mall’ in her phone years ago, wanting to write it into a song.

April 17, 2020: Lover Fest is cancelled. Taylor writes mirrorball and this is me trying shortly after.

MIRRORBALL

On folklore there are a lot of songs that reference each other or have lyrical parallels and one of the ones that I like is the entire song 'this is me trying' then being referenced again in ‘mirrorball,’ which is, ‘I’ve never been a natural, all I do is try’. Sometimes when I’m writing to an instrumental track I’ll push ‘Play’ and I’ll immediately see a scene set and this was one of those cases. I just saw a lonely disco ball, twinkly lights, neon signs, people drinking beer by the bar, a couple of stragglers on the dance floor. Sort of a sad, moonlit, lonely experience in the middle of a town you’ve never been. I was just thinking that we have mirrorballs in the middle of a dance floor because they reflect light, they are broken a million times and that’s what makes them so shiny. We have people like that in society, too. They hang there and every time they break it entertains us. And when you shine a light on them it’s this glittering, fantastic thing. But then, a lot of the time when the spotlight isn’t on them they’re just still there, up on that pedestal but no one is watching them. It was a metaphor for celebrity but it’s also a metaphor for so many people. Everybody has to feel like they have to be ‘on’ for certain people. You have to be different versions of yourself for different people. Different versions at work, different versions around friends. Different versions of yourself around different friends. A different version of yourself around family. Everybody feels that they have to be in some ways duplicitous and that’s part of the human experience. But it’s also exhausting. And you learn that every one of us has the ability to become a shapeshifter. But what does that do to us?

THIS IS ME TRYING

“I’ve been thinking about people who are either suffering through mental illness, addiction or who have an everyday struggle. No one pats them on the back every day but every day they are actively fighting something. There are so many days that nobody gives them credit for that and so, how often must somebody who’s in that sort of internal struggle wanna say to everyone in the room: ‘You have no idea how close I am to going back to a dark place.’ I had this idea that the first verse would be about someone who is in a life crisis and has just been trying and failing in their relationship, has been messing things up with people they love, has been letting everyone down and has driven to this overlook, this cliff, and is just in the car, going, ‘I could do whatever I want in this moment and it could affect everything forever.’ But this person backs up and drives home. The second verse is about someone who felt like they had a lot of potential in their life. I feel like there are a lot of mechanisms for us in our school days, in high school or college, to excel and to be patted on the back for something. And then a lot of people get out of school and there are less abilities for them to get gold stars. Then you have to make all these decisions and you have to pave your own way. There’s no set class course you can take. I think a lot of people feel really swept up in that. And so I was thinking about this person who is really lost in life and then starts drinking…and every second is trying not to.”

March/April 2020: the lakes was also done remotely, but written before Taylor started collaborating with Aaron, placing it between March and April 2020:

[Taylor] “We’d gone to the Lake District in England a couple years ago. In the 19th century you had a lot of poets like William Wordsworth and John Keats who’d spend a lot of time there. And there was a poet district, these artists that moved there. They were heckled for it and made fun of for being these eccentrics and kind of odd artists who decided that they just wanted to live there. I remember thinking, ‘I could see this.’ You live in a cottage and you got wisteria growing up the outside of it…of course they escaped like that. And they had their own community of other artists who’d done the same thing. I’ve always, in my career since I was probably about twenty, written about this cottage backup plan that I have. I have been writing about that forever. I went to William Wordsworth’s grave and just sat there and I was like, ‘Wow. He went and did it.’ And you kept writing but you didn’t subscribe to the things that were killing you. And that’s really the overarching thing that I felt when I was writing folklore: I may not be able to go to The Lakes right now – or to go anywhere – but I’m going there in my head. The escape plan is working.”

[Jack] On one of my favorite songs on folklore, “The Lakes,” there was this big orchestral version, and Taylor was like, “Eh, make it small.” I had gotten lost in the string arrangements and all this stuff, and I took everything out. I was just like, “Oh, my God!” We were not together because that record was made [remotely], but I remember being in the studio alone like, “Holy shit, this is so perfect.”

This version of the lakes was released on folklore's first anniversary.

April 24, 2020: For his birthday, Aaron Dessner goes on an Instagram Live where he plays a bunch of songs including “Gaite” aka “happiness” and “Stella”, like his daughter, aka “invisible string”

April 27-28, 2020: Taylor contacts Aaron Dessner and asks him to work with her. He sends her a folder of instrumental tracks he had recorded over the years. The first one that inspires Taylor is called “Maple” which will become cardigan. She sends back a voice memo, and right after, she posts a selfie on Instagram with the caption “Not a lot going on at the moment”. What a troll.

[Taylor] The song is about a long lost romance, and why young love is often fixed so permanently within our memories. When looking back on it, why it leaves such an incredible mark and how special it made you feel; all the good things it made you feel, all the pain that it made you feel... The line about feeling like you were an old cardigan under someone's bed, but someone put you on and made you feel like you were their favorite.

[Aaron] That’s the first song we wrote. After Taylor asked if I would be interested in writing with her remotely and working on songs, I said, “Are you interested in a certain kind of sound?” She said, “I’m just interested in what you do and what you’re up to. Just send anything, literally anything, it could be the weirdest thing you’ve ever done,” so I sent a folder of stuff I had done that I was really excited about recently. “cardigan” was one of those sketches; it was originally called “Maple.” It was basically exactly what it is on the record, except we added orchestration later that my brother wrote. I sent [the file] at 9 p.m., and around 2 a.m. or something, there was “cardigan,” fully written. That’s when I realized something crazy was happening. She just dialed directly into the heart of the music and wrote an incredible song and fully conceived of it and then kept going. It harkens back to lessons learned, or experiences in your youth, in a really beautiful way and this sense of longing and sadness, but ultimately, it’s cathartic. I thought it was a perfect match for the music, and how her voice feels. It was kind of a guide. It had these lower register parts, and I think we both realized that this was a bit of a lightning rod for a lot of the rest of the record.

[Taylor] “The quality that really confounded me about Aaron’s instrumental tracks is that to me, they were immediately, intensely visual,” Swift wrote in an email. “As soon as I heard the first one, I understood why he calls them ‘sketches.’ The first time I heard the track for ‘Cardigan,’ I saw high heels on cobblestones. I knew it had to be about teenage miscommunications and the loss of what could’ve been. I’ve always been so curious about people with synesthesia, who see colors or shapes when they hear music. The closest thing I’ve ever experienced is seeing an entire story or scene play out in my head when I hear Aaron Dessner’s instrumental tracks.”

Aaron Dessner shared a screenshot from when Taylor sent him back cardigan.

April 29-30, 2020: Taylor writes seven and peace. seven is the only song that was entirely recorded at Long Pond.

SEVEN

[Aaron] This is the second song we wrote. It’s kind of looking back at childhood and those childhood feelings, recounting memories and memorializing them. It’s this beautiful folk song. It has one of the most important lines on the record: “And just like a folk song, our love will be passed on.” That’s what this album is doing. It’s passing down. It’s memorializing love, childhood, and memories. It’s a folkloric way of processing.

PEACE

[Taylor] “I think this is a song that is extremely personal to me. There are times when I feel like with everything that’s in my control, I can make myself seem like someone who doesn’t have an abnormal life and I try that every day. It’s like, 'How do I make my friends, and family, and my loved ones not see this big elephant that’s in the room for our normal life?' Because I don’t want the elephant in the room. If you’re gonna be in my life I feel like there’s a certain amount that comes with it that I can’t stop from happening. I can’t stop from you getting a call in the morning that says, ‘The tabloids are writing this today.’ I can’t help it if there’s a guy with a camera two miles away with a telescope lense taking pictures of you. I can’t stop those things from happening. And so this song was basically like, ‘Is it enough? Is the stuff that I can control enough to block out the things that I can’t?' So it makes me really emotional to hear this song.

[Taylor] To know that a lot of people related to it who aren’t talking about the same things that I’m talking about. They’re talking about human complexity. It’s about someone who you wanna provide with peace, someone you love, so you want them to have as much peace in their life as possible and reconciling the fact that you might not be their best option for that. But is it still a deal they wanna take?

[Taylor to Paul McCartney] peace is actually more rooted in my personal life. I know you have done a really excellent job of this in your personal life: carving out a human life within a public life, and how scary that can be when you do fall in love and you meet someone, especially if you’ve met someone who has a very grounded, normal way of living. I, oftentimes, in my anxieties, can control how I am as a person and how normal I act and rationalize things, but I cannot control if there are 20 photographers outside in the bushes and what they do and if they follow our car and if they interrupt our lives. I can’t control if there’s going to be a fake weird headline about us in the news tomorrow.

[Aaron] “I wrote this, and Justin provided the pulse. We trade ideas all the time and he made a folder, and there was a pulse in there that I wrote these bass lines to. In the other parts of the composition, I did it to Justin’s pulse. Taylor heard this sketch and she wrote the song. It reminds me of Joni Mitchell, in a way — there’s this really powerful and emotional love song, even the impressionistic, almost jazz-like bridge, and she weaves it perfectly together. This is one of my favorites, for sure. But the truth is that the music, that way of playing with harmonized bass lines, is something that probably comes a little bit from me being inspired by how Justin does that sometimes. There’s probably a connection there. We didn’t talk too much about it [laughs]. The song “peace” — when she wrote that, it was just a harmonized bass and a pulse. She wrote this incredible love song to it that’s one vocal take.”

May 2020: Taylor and Aaron spend the entire month writing all the songs on folklore.

EXILE (FT. BON IVER)

Taylor and William Bowery, the singer-songwriter, wrote that song initially together and sent it to me as a sort of a rough demo where Taylor was singing both the male and female parts. It’s supposed to be a dialogue between two lovers. I interpreted that and built the song, played the piano, and built around that template. We recorded Taylor’s vocals with her singing her parts but also the male parts. We talked a lot about who she thought would be perfect to sing, and we kept coming back to Justin [Vernon]. Obviously, he’s a dear friend of mine and collaborator. I said, “Well, if he’s inspired by the song, he’ll do it, and if not, he won’t.” I sent it to him and said, “No pressure at all, literally no pressure, but how do you feel about this?” He said, “Wow.” He wrote some parts into it also, and we went back and forth a little bit, but it felt like an incredibly natural and safe collaboration between friends. It didn’t feel like getting a guest star or whatever. It was just like, well, we’re working on something, and obviously he’s crazy talented, but it just felt right. I think they both put so much raw emotion into it. It’s like a surface bubbling. It’s believable, you know? You believe that they’re having this intense dialogue. With other people I had to be secretive, but with Justin, because he was going to sing, I actually did send him a version of the song with her vocals and told him what I was up to. He was like, “Whoa! Awesome!” But he’s been involved in so many big collaborative things that he wasn’t interested in it from that point of view. It’s more because he loved the song and he thought he could do something with it that would add something.

[Taylor on exile] “Exile was a song that was written about miscommunications in relationships, and in the case of this song I imagine that the miscommunications ended the relationship - that they led to sort of the demise of this love affair. And now these two people are seeing each other out for the first time and they keep miscommunicating with each other, they can’t quite get on the same page, they never were able to. So even in their end, even after they’ve broken up they’re still not hearing each other, so we imagined that the beginning of it would be his side of the story, second verse would be her side of the story, and then the end would be sort of them talking over each other and not listening to the other, sort of like an argument. Yeah, I’m really stoked about how it turned out because it really does seem like this sort of tragedy of two people, two ships passing in the night.”

[Joe Alwyn] Alwyn doesn’t consider himself a musician or songwriter and insists that he is, in fact, an awful singer. He was merely “messing around” on the piano when Swift heard and walked over, intrigued. He had been singing the fully formed first verse to the song that became “Exile.”. “It was completely off the cuff, an accident,” he says, shrugging. “She said, ‘Can we try and sit down and get to the end together?’ And so we did. It was as basic as some people made sourdough.” I’d probably had a drink and was just stumbling around the house. We couldn’t decide on a film to watch that night, and she was like, ‘Do you want to try and finish writing that song you were singing earlier?’ And so we got a guitar and did that. I press him on this point — he wrote an entire verse to a Taylor Swift song without trying? “Who doesn’t walk around the house singing?” he asks. I explain that it’s unusual for hit songs to spring forth like that from non-musicians’ heads. He says he wasn’t trying to write to Swift’s personal sound but had been listening to a lot of the National.

[Aaron] It was Taylor’s idea to approach [Justin Vernon]. I sent him Taylor’s voice memo of her singing both parts, and he got really excited and loved the song and then he wrote the extra part in the bridge.

INVISIBLE STRING

[Taylor] When I first heard the track that [Aaron] sent me I thought, ‘I have to write something that matches it’. And pretty quickly I came upon the idea of fate. ‘Cause sometimes I just go into a rabbit hole of thinking about how things happen and I love the romantic idea that every step you’re taking, you’re taking one step closer to what you’re supposed to be, guided by this little invisible string. I wrote it right after I sent an ex a baby gift and I just remember thinking, 'This is a full signifier that life is great!'

[Aaron] That was another one where it was music that I’d been playing for a couple of months and sort of humming along to her. It felt like one of the songs that pulls you along. Just playing it on one guitar, it has this emotional locomotion in it, a meditative finger-picking pattern that I really gravitate to. It’s played on this rubber bridge that my friend put on [the guitar] and it deadens the strings so that it sounds old. The core of it sounds like a folk song. It’s also kind of a sneaky pop song, because of the beat that comes in. She knew that there was something coming because she said, “You know, I love this and I’m hearing something already.” And then she said, “This will change the story,” this beautiful and direct kind of recounting of a relationship in its origin.

MAD WOMAN

[Taylor] [“mad woman” has] these ominous strings underneath it and I was like, ‘Oh, this is female rage.' And then I was thinking the most rage provoking element of being a female is the gaslighting that happens. For centuries, we were just expected to absorb male behavior silently. And oftentimes, when we – in our enlightened and emboldened state – now respond to bad male behavior or somebody just doing something that’s absolutely out of line and we respond, that response is treated like the offense itself. There’s been situations recently with someone who’s very guilty of this in my life and it’s a person who makes me feel (or tries to make me feel) like I’m the offender by having any kind of defense to his offenses. It’s like I have absolutely no right to respond or I’m crazy. I have no right to respond or I’m angry. I have no right to respond or I’m out of line. So [Aaron] provided the musical bed for me to make that point that I’ve been trying so hard to figure out how to make…How do I say why this feels so bad?

[Aaron] That might be the most scathing song on folklore. It has a darkness that I think is cathartic, sort of witch-hunting and gaslighting and maybe bullying. Sometimes you become the person people try to pin you into a corner to be, which is not really fair. But again, don’t quote me on that [laughs], I just have my own interpretation. It’s one of the biggest releases on the album to me. It has this very sharp tone to it, but sort of in gothic folklore. It’s this record’s goth song.

EPIPHANY

[Taylor] I remember thinking, ‘Maybe I wanna write a sports story.’ Because I had just watched The Last Dance and I was thinking all in terms of sports, and winners, and underdogs. But actually, what I had been doing really frequently up until that point was I had been doing a lot of research on my grandfather who fought in World War II at Guadalcanal, which was an extremely bloody battle. And he never talked about it. Not with his sons, not with his wife. Nobody got to hear about what happened there. So my dad and his brothers did a lot of digging and found out that my granddad was exposed to some of the worst situations you could ever imagine as a human being. So I kind of tried to imagine what would happen in order to make you just never be able to speak about something. And when I was thinking about that I realized that there are people right now taking a twenty minute break in between shifts at a hospital who are having this kind of trauma happen to them right now, that they probably will never wanna speak about. And so I thought that this is an opportunity to maybe tell that story. I often feel that there have been times in my life where things have fallen apart so methodically, and I couldn’t control how things were going wrong, and nothing I did stopped it. I just felt like I’d been pushed out a plane and I was scratching on the air on the way down. I just felt like the universe was doing its thing. It was just dismantling my life and there was nothing I could do. And this is a weird situation where – ever since I started making music with [Aaron] – I felt like that was the universe forcing things to fall into place perfectly and there’s nothing I could do. It’s one of those weird things that makes you think about life a lot. This lockdown could’ve been a time where I absolutely lost my mind and instead I think this album was a real floatation device for both of us.

[Aaron] For epiphany, she did have this idea of a beautiful drone, or a very cinematic sort of widescreen song, where it’s not a lot of accents but more like a sea to bathe in. A stillness, in a sense. I first made this crazy drone which starts the song, and it’s there the whole time. It’s lots of different instruments played and then slowed down and reversed. It created this giant stack of harmony, which is so giant that it was kind of hard to manage, sonically, but it was very beautiful to get lost in. And then I played the piano to it, and it almost felt classical or something, those suspended chords. I think she just heard it, and instantly, this song came to her, which is really an important one. It’s partially the story of her grandfather, who was a soldier, and partially then a story about a nurse in modern times. I don’t know if this is how she did it, but to me, it’s like a nurse, doctor, or medical professional, where med school doesn’t fully prepare you for seeing someone pass away or just the difficult emotional things that you’ll encounter in your job. In the past, heroes were just soldiers. Now they’re also medical professionals. To me, that’s the underlying mission of the song. There are some things that you see that are hard to talk about. You can’t talk about it. You just bear witness to them. But there’s something else incredibly soothing and comforting about this song. To me, it’s this Icelandic kind of feel, almost classical. My brother did really beautiful orchestration of it.

BETTY

[Aaron] This one Taylor and William wrote, and then both Jack and I worked on it. We all kind of passed it around. This is the one where Taylor wanted a reference. She wanted it to have an early Bob Dylan, sort of a Freewheelin’ Bob Dylan feel. We pushed it a little more towards John Wesley Harding, since it has some drums. It’s this epic narrative folk song where it tells us a long story and connects back to “cardigan.” It starts to connect dots and I think it’s a beautifully written folk song.

[Taylor] I just heard Joe singing the entire fully formed chorus of ‘betty’ from another room. And I was just like, ‘Hello.’ It was a step that we would never have taken, because why would we have ever written a song together? So this was the first time we had a conversation where I came in and I was like, 'Hey, this could be really weird, and we could hate this, so because we’re in quarantine and there’s nothing else going on, could we just try to see what it’s like if we write this song together?' So he was singing the chorus of it, and I thought it sounded really good from a man’s voice, from a masculine perspective. And I really liked that it seemed to be an apology. I’ve written so many songs from a female’s perspective of wanting a male apology that we decided to make it from a teenage boy’s perspective apologizing after he loses the love of his life because he’s been foolish.

[James] has lost the love of his life basically and doesn't understand how to get it back. I think we all have these situations in our lives where we learn to really, really give a heartfelt apology for the first time. Everybody makes mistakes, everybody really messes up sometimes and this is a song that I wrote from the perspective of a 17-year-old boy. I've always loved that in music you can kinda slip into different identities and you can sing from other people's perspectives. So that's what I did on this one," the superstar explained of the song's premise, before revealing, "I named all the characters in this story after my friends' kids... and I hope you like it!

[Joe Alwyn] I’d probably had a drink and was just stumbling around the house. We couldn’t decide on a film to watch that night, and she was like, ‘Do you want to try and finish writing that song you were singing earlier?’ And so we got a guitar and did that.” Initially, Alwyn didn’t want his name credited, anticipating that what he describes as the “clickbait conversation” would distract people from actually listening to the music. So he went by William Bowery as a nod to his music-composer great-grandfather and the Manhattan street.

[Taylor] With ‘betty,’ Jack Antonoff would text me these articles and think pieces and in-depth Tumblr posts on what this love triangle meant to the person who had listened to it. And that’s exactly what I was hoping would happen with this album. I wrote these stories for a specific reason and from a specific place about specific people that I imagined, but I wanted that to all change given who was listening to it. And I wanted it to start out as mine and become other people’s. It’s been really fun to watch.

THE LAST GREAT AMERICAN DYNASTY

[Taylor] When [Aaron] sent me the track to ‘the last great american dynasty’ I had been wanting to write a song about Rebekah Harkness since 2013, probably. I’d never figured out the right way to do it because there was never a track that felt like it could hold an entire story of somebody’s life and moving between generations. When I heard that [the track] I was like, ‘Oh my God, I think this is my opening. I think this is my moment. I think I can write the Rebekah Harkness story!' It has that country music narrative device.”

[Aaron] I wrote that after we’d been working for a while. It was an attempt to write something attractive, more uptempo and kind of pushing. I also was interested in this almost In Rainbows-style latticework of electric guitars. They come in and sort of pull you along, kind of reminiscent of Big Red Machine. It was very much in this sound world that I’ve been playing around with, and she immediately clicked with that. Initially I was imagining these dreamlike distant electric guitars and electronics but with an element of folk. There’s a lot going on in that sense. I sent it before I went on a run, and when I got back from the run, that song was there [laughs].She told me the story behind it, which sort of recounts the narrative of Rebekah Harkness, whom people actually called Betty. She was married to the heir of Standard Oil fortune, married into the Harkness family, and they bought this house in Rhode Island up on a cliff. It’s kind of the story of this woman and the outrageous parties she threw. She was infamous for not fitting in, entirely, in society; that story, at the end, becomes personal. Eventually, Taylor bought that house. I think that is symptomatic of folklore, this type of narrative song. We didn’t do very much to that either.

[Taylor] “Anyone who's been there before knows that I do 'The Tour,' where I show everyone through the house. And I tell them different anecdotes about each room, because I've done that much research on this house and this woman. So in every single room, there's a different anecdote about Rebekah Harkness. If you have a mixed group of people who've been there before and people who haven't, [the people who’ve been there] are like, "Oh, she's going to do the tour. She's got to tell you the story about how the ballerinas used to practice on the lawn.” And they'll go get a drink and skip it because it's the same every time. But for me, I'm telling the story with the same electric enthusiasm, because it's just endlessly entertaining to me that this fabulous woman lived there. She just did whatever she wanted.”

Dessner and Swift were working intensively and at high speed throughout 2020, so much so that on one occasion the producer sent the singer a track and went out for a run in the countryside around Long Pond. By the time he got back, Swift had already written ‘the last great american dynasty’ and it was waiting for him in his inbox.

Late May/Early June 2020: Taylor sends Aaron the last two folklore songs, the 1 and hoax.

[Aaron] “the 1” and “hoax,” the first song and the last song, were the last songs we did. The album was sort of finished before that. We thought it was complete, but Taylor then went back into the folder of ideas that I had shared. I think in a way, she didn’t realize she was writing for this album or a future something. She wrote “the 1,” and then she wrote “hoax” a couple of hours later and sent them in the middle of the night. When I woke up in the morning, I wrote her before she woke up in LA and said, “These have to be on the record.” She woke up and said, “I agree” [laughs]. These are the bookends, you know?It’s clear that “the 1” is not written from her perspective. It’s written from another friend’s perspective. There’s an emotional wryness and rawness, while also to this kind of wink in her eyes. There’s a little bit of her sense of humor in there, in addition to this kind of sadness that exists both underneath and on the surface. I enjoy that about her writing. The song [began from] the voice memo she sent me, and then I worked on the music some and we tracked her vocals, and then my brother added orchestration. There are a few other little bits, but basically that was one of the very last things we did. [Hoax] is a big departure. I think she said to me, “Don’t try to give it any other space other than what feels natural to you.” If you leave me in a room with a piano, I might play something like this. I take a lot of comfort in this. I think I imagined her playing this and singing it. After writing all these songs, this one felt the most emotional and, in a way, the rawest. It is one of my favorites. There’s sadness, but it’s a kind of hopeful sadness. It’s a recognition that you take on the burden of your partners, your loved ones, and their ups and downs. That’s both “peace” and “hoax” to me. That’s part of how I feel about those songs because I think that’s life. There’s a reality, the gravity or an understanding of the human condition.

[Taylor on the 1] I think, ‘I’m doing good, I’m on some new shit, been saying 'Yes' instead of 'No’ has a double meaning. Opening the album with that line applies to the situation that this song is written about where you’re updating a former lover on what your life is like now and trying to be positive about it. But it was also about where I am creatively. I’m just saying ‘Yes’, I’m just putting out an album in the worst time you could put one out, I’m just making stuff with someone who I’ve always wanted to make stuff with, as long as I’ve been a fan of The National. I’m just going to say 'Yes’ to stuff and it worked out.

[Taylor on hoax] The word ‘hoax’ is another one that I love. I love that is has an ‘x’ and the way it looks and sounds. I think with this song being the last one on the album it kind of embodied all the things that this album was thematically: confessions, incorporating nature, emotional volatility and ambiguity at the same time, love that isn’t just easy. And it’s the most symbolic and poetic thing, listing all these things that this person is to you. That line, ‘You know it still hurts underneath my scars from when they pulled me apart’ – anyone in my life knows what I’m singing about there but everybody has that situation in their life where you let someone in and they get to know you and they know exactly what buttons to push to hurt you the most. That thing where the scars healed over but there’s still phantom pain. I think the part that sounds like love to me is, ‘Don’t want no other shade of blue but you. No other sadness in the world would do.’ To me that sounds like what love really is. Who would you be sad with? And who would you deal with when they were sad? And like, gray skies every day for months, would you still stay?

[Aaron] We didn’t talk about [the meaning of the album] at first. It was only after writing six or seven songs, basically when I thought my writing was done, when we got on the phone and said, “OK, I think we’re making an album. I have these six other ideas that I love with Jack [Antonoff] that we’ve already done, and I think what we’ve done fits really well with them.” It’s sort of these narratives, these folkloric songs, with characters that interweave and are written from different perspectives. She had a vision, and it was connecting back in some way to the folk tradition, but obviously not entirely sonically. It’s more about the narrative aspect of it. I think it’s this sort of nostalgia and wistfulness that is in a lot of the songs. A lot of them have this kind of longing for looking back on things that have happened in your life, in your friend’s life, or another loved one’s life, and the kind of storytelling around that. That was clear to her. But then we kept going, and more and more songs happened. It was a very organic process where [meaning] wasn’t something that we really discussed. It just kind of would happen where she would dive back into the folder and find other things that were inspiring. Or she and William Bowery would write “exile,” and then that happened. There were different stages of the process.

May 21, 2020: As stated in the folklore: long pond sessions, Taylor started recording the vocals on this day. She also finishes august while in the vocal booth.

[Taylor] In my head, I’ve been calling the girl from ‘august’ either Augusta or Augustine. What happened in my head was: ‘cardigan’ is Betty’s perspective from 20 or 30 years later, looking back on this love that was this tumultuous thing. I think Betty and James ended up together. So in my head, she ends up with him but he really put her through it. ‘august’ was obviously about the girl that James had this summer with. She seems like she’s a bad girl, but really she’s not. She’s a really sensitive person who fell for him and she was trying to seem cool and like she didn’t care because that’s what girls have to do. And she was trying to let him think that she didn’t care, but she did and she thought they had something very real. And then he goes back to Betty. So the idea that there is some bad, villain girl in any type of situation who ‘takes your man’ is a total myth because that’s not usually the case at all. Everybody has feelings and wants to be seen and loved. And Augustine…that’s all she wanted.

She previously had written down the phrase ‘Meet me behind the mall’ in her phone years ago, wanting to write it into a song.

May 22-June 5, 2020: Taylor leaves LA and goes to Upstate New York to touch up some vocals (Betty), and shooting the photoshoot at Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds' house. She also records Carolina at Long Pond. The song was recorded in one take using only instruments available before 1953.

[EW Interview] “I had this idea for the [Folklore album cover] that it would be this girl sleepwalking through the forest in a nightgown in 1830 [laughs]. Very specific. A pioneer woman sleepwalking at night. I made a mood board and sent it to Beth [Garrabrant], who I had never worked with before, who shoots only on film. We were just carrying bags across a field and putting the bags of film down, and then taking pictures. It was a blast. I'd done my hair and makeup and brought some nightgowns. These experiences I was used to having with 100 people on set, commanding alongside other people in a very committee fashion — all of a sudden it was me and a photographer, or me and my DP. It was a new challenge, because I love collaboration. But there's something really fun about knowing what you can do if it's just you doing it.”

[About Carolina] About a year & half ago I wrote a song about the story of a girl who always lived on the outside, looking in. Figuratively & literally. The juxtaposition of her loneliness & independence. Her curiosity & fear all tangled up. Her persisting gentleness & the world’s betrayal of it. I wrote this one alone in the middle of the night and then Aaron Dessner and I meticulously worked on a sound that we felt would be authentic to the moment when this story takes place. I made a wish that one day you would hear it. here The Crawdads Sing is a book I got absolutely lost in when I read it years ago. As soon as I heard there was a film in the works starring the incredible Daisy Edgar-Jones and produced by the brilliant Reese Witherspoon, I knew I wanted to be a part of it from the musical side. I wrote the song “Carolina” alone and asked my friend Aaron Dessner to produce it. I wanted to create something haunting and ethereal to match this mesmerizing story.

June 5, 2020: The Inner Circle posts the Oxford definition of the word folklore: “The traditional beliefs, customs, and stories of a community, passed through the generations by word of mouth.” adding “Taylor, your secret is safe with us.” later that day.

June 16, 2020: The Inner Circle posts the Oxford definition of the word cardigan: “A knitted sweater fastening down the front, typically with long sleeves. (Taylor, your secret remains safe with us. Here at the IC we are anxiously awaiting your big reveal)”

June-July 2020: During June and possibly early July, Aaron and Jon Low mix and master the album. It's a complicated process.

[Aaron] If there was trouble it started to be because of track counts. I probably only used 20 percent of what was actually recorded, ’cause we would try a lot of things, y’know. So, eventually the sessions got kinda crazy and you’d have to deactivate a lot of things and print things. But we got used to that. [...] I think the main thing was I wanted her vocals to have a more full range than maybe you typically hear, because I think a lot of the more pop oriented records are mixed a certain way and they take some of the warmth out of the vocal, so that it’s very bright and it kinda cuts really well on the radio. But she has this wonderful lower warmth frequency in her voice which is particularly important on a song like ‘seven’. If you carved out that mud, y’know, it wouldn’t hit you the same way. Or, like, ‘cardigan’, I think it needs that warmth, the kind of fuller feeling to it. It makes it darker, but to me that’s where a lot of emotion is.

[Aaron on the mixing process] In some instances, the final mix ended up being the never bettered rough mix, while other songs took far more work. “‘cardigan’ is basically the rough, as is ‘seven’. So, like the early, early mixes, when we didn’t even know we were mixing, we never were able to make it better. Like if you make it sound ‘good’, it might not be as good ’cause it loses some of its weird magic, y’know. But songs like ‘the last great american dynasty’ or ‘mad woman’, those songs were a little harder to create the dynamics the way you want them, and the pay off without going too far, and with also just keeping in the kind of aesthetic that we were in. Those were harder, I would say.

[Mixer Jon Low] In the beginning it did not feel real,” recalls Low. “There was this brand new collaboration, and it was amazing how quickly Aaron made these instrumental sketches and Taylor wrote lyrics and melodies to them, which she initially sent to us as iPhone voice memos. During our nightly family dinners in lockdown, Aaron would regularly pull up his phone and say, ‘Listen to this!’ and there would be another voice memo from Taylor with this beautiful song that she had written over a sketch of Aaron’s in a matter of hours. The rate at which it was happening was mind blowing. There was constant elevation, inspiration and just wanting to continue the momentum. “We put her voice memos straight into Pro Tools. They had tons of character, because of the weird phone compression and cutting midrange quality you just would not get when you put someone in front of a pristine recording chain. Plus there was all this bleed. It’s interesting how that dictates the attitude of the vocal and of the song. Even though none of the original voice memos ended up on the albums, they often gave us unexpected hints. These voice memos were such on a whim things, they were really telling. Taylor had certain phrasings and inflections that we often returned to later on. They became our reference points. “Taylor’s voice memos often came with suggestions for how to edit the sketches: maybe throw in a bridge somewhere, shorten a section, change the chords or arrangement somewhere, and so on. Aaron would have similar ideas, and he then developed the arrangements, often with his brother Bryce, adding or replacing instruments. This happened fast, and became very interactive between us and Taylor, even though we were working remotely. When we added instruments, we were reacting to the way my rough mixes felt at the very beginning. Of course, it was also dictated by how Taylor wrote and sang to the tracks.”

[Jon Low on the mixing process] Throughout the entire process we were trying to maintain the original feel. Sometimes this was hard, because that initial rawness would get lost in large arrangements and additional layering. With revisions of folklore in particular we sometimes were losing the emotional weight from earlier more casual mixes. Because I was always mixing, there was also always the danger of over mixing. “We were trying to get the best of each mix version, and sometimes that meant stepping backwards, and grabbing a piano chain from an earlier mix, or going three versions back to before we added orchestration. There were definitely moments of thinking, ‘Is this going to compete sonically? Is this loud enough?’ We knew we loved the way the songs sounded as we were building them, so we stuck with what we knew. There were times where I tried to keep pushing a mix forward but it didn’t improve the song — ‘cardigan’ is an example of a song where we ended up choosing a very early mix.

July 2020: While folklore is being finished, Taylor continues to write songs. The first two songs, that at first seem like Big Red Machine songs, are dorothea and closure.

[Aaron] A lot more of [evermore] was made from scratch. After Folklore came out, I think Taylor had written two songs early on that we both thought were for Big Red Machine, “Closure” and “Dorothea.” But the more I listened to them, not that they couldn’t be Big Red Machine songs, but they felt like interesting, exciting Taylor songs. “Closure” is very experimental and in this weird time signature, but still lyrically felt like some evolution of Folklore, and “Dorothea” definitely felt like it was reflecting on some character.

[Aaron on closure] Vernon provided the grainy beat that kicks off ‘closure’, one of two tracks on evermore that started life as a sketch for the second Big Red Machine album. “It was this little loop that Justin had given me in this folder of ‘Starters’, he calls them. I had heard that and been playing the piano to it. But I was hearing it in 5/4, although it’s not in 5/4. ‘Closure’ really opened everything up further. There were no real limits to where we were gonna try to write songs.”

In the Billboard interview above, Aaron says he thinks that Taylor wrote them after folklore was released, while in the Rolling Stone one he says they were written while finishing up the folklore mixes.

“I think I’d written around 30 of those songs in total,” Dessner recalls. “So when I started sharing them with Taylor over the months that we were working on Folklore, she got really into it, and she wrote two songs to some of that music.” One was “Closure,” an experimental electronic track in 5/4 time signature that was built over a staccato drum kit. The other song was “Dorothea,” a rollicking, Americana piano tune. The more Dessner listened to them, the more he realized that they were continuations of Folklore‘s characters and stories. But the real turning point came soon after Folklore‘s surprise release in late July, when Dessner wrote a musical sketch and named it “Westerly,” after the town in Rhode Island where Swift owns the house previously owned by Rebekah Harkness.

Dorothea is the only evermore song to have been recorded at Taylor's home studio in LA, she left LA 3 days after the release of folklore so Occam's razor, I'm guessing that the RS interview is the correct one and dorothea and closure were written in late June/early July, while the Folklorians were finishing up the album.

July 24, 2020: folklore is released, after being announced the day before.

August 6-18, 2020: To celebrate how well folklore was received, Aaron composes an instrumental track called Westerly, named after the town in Rhode Island where Taylor owns Holiday House. Taylor writes willow on it, then sends a voice memo to Aaron.

[Voice Memo] “Here's the Westerly one, written in Westerly!”

[Aaron] And I, sort of in celebration of Folklore, had written a piece of music that I titled “Westerly,” that’s where she has the house that she wrote “Last Great American Dynasty” about. I’ll do that sometimes, just make things for friends or write music just to write it, but I didn’t at all think it would become a song. And she, like an hour later, sent back “Willow” written to that song, and that sort of set [things in motion] and we just started filling this Dropbox again. It was kind of like, “What’s happening?”

There are so many stories I could share. When I sent Taylor the music for our song 'willow' — I think she wrote the entire song from start to finish in less than 10 minutes and sent it back to me. It was like an earthquake. Then Taylor said, 'I guess we are making another album.'

I liked opening the album with ['willow'] because I loved the feeling that I got, immediately upon hearing the instrumental that Aaron created for it. It felt strangely witchy, like somebody making a love potion, dreaming up the person that they want and desire, and trying to figure out how to get that person in their life. And all the misdirection, and bait and switch, and complexity that goes into seeing someone, feeling a connection, wanting them, and trying to make them a part of your life. It’s tactical at times, it’s confusing at times, it’s up to fate, it’s magical. It felt a bit magical and mysterious, which is what I want people to feel going into an album that was a collection of these stories that were going to take them in all kinds of directions. I just wanted to start them off with a setting of the vibe.

August/September 2020: Taylor writes no body, no crime, possibly while in London.

[Taylor] Working with the HAIM sisters on 'no body, no crime' was pretty hilarious because it came about after I wrote a pretty dark murder mystery song and had named the character Este, because she’s the friend I have who would be stoked to be in a song like that. I had finished the song and was nailing down some lyric details and texted her, 'You’re not going to understand this text for a few days but... which chain restaurant do you like best?' and I named a few. She chose Olive Garden and a few days later I sent her the song and asked if they would sing on it. It was an immediate 'YES.'

[Aaron] Taylor wrote that one alone and sent me a voice memo of her playing guitar — she wrote it on this rubber-bridge guitar that I got for her. It’s the same kind I play on “Invisible String.” So she wrote “No Body, No Crime” and sent me a voice memo of it, and then I started building on that. It’s funny, because the music I’ve listened to the most in my life are things that are more like that — roots music, folk music, country music, old-school rock & roll, the Grateful Dead. It’s not really the sound of the National or other things I’ve done, but it feels like a warm blanket. Taylor had specific ideas from the beginning about references and how she wanted it to feel, and that she wanted the Haim sisters to sing on it. We had them record the song with Ariel Reichshaid, they sent that from L.A., and then we put it together when Taylor was here [at Long Pond]. They’re an incredible band, and it was another situation where we were like, “Well, this happened.” It felt like this weird little rock & roll history anecdote.

[Aaron] [We realized evermore was going to end up being another album] after we’d written several songs, seven or eight or nine. Each one would happen, and we would both be in this sort of disbelief of this weird alchemy that we had unleashed. The ideas were coming fast and furiously and were just as compelling as anything on Folklore, and it felt like the most natural thing in the world. At some point, Taylor wrote evermore with William Bowery, and then we sent it to Justin, who wrote the bridge, and all of a sudden, that’s when it started to become clear that there was a sister record.

September 16- 23, 2020: Taylor and Jack go to Upstate New York to record the Long Pond Studio Session. She writes 'tis the damn season there on the 17th. Afterwards Taylor stays a few more days to record the bulk of the evermore vocals: willow, champagne problems, gold rush, 'tis the damn season, tolerate it, no body no crime, coney island, ivy, long story short, marjorie, closure, evermore, and it’s time to go.

After the Folklore: The Long Pond Studio Sessions, [Taylor] stayed for quite a while and we recorded a lot. She actually wrote 'tis the damn season when she arrived for the first day of rehearsal. We played all night and drank a lot of wine after the fireside chat — and we were all pretty drunk, to be honest — and then I thought she went to bed. But the next morning, at 9:00 a.m. or something, she showed up and was like, “I have to sing you this song,” and she had written it in the middle of the night. That was definitely another moment [where] my brain exploded, because she sang it to me in my kitchen, and it was just surreal. That music is actually older — it’s something I wrote many years ago, and hid away because I loved it so much. It meant something to me, and it felt like the perfect song finally found it. There was a feeling in it, and she identified that feeling: That feeling of... “The ache in you, put there by the ache in me.” I think everyone can relate to that. It’s one of my favorites.

[Aaron] She stayed after we were done filming and then we recorded a lot. It was crazy because we were getting ready to make that film, but at the same time, these songs were accumulating. And so we thought, “Hmm, I guess we should just stay and work.”

CHAMPAGNE PROBLEMS

[Taylor] Joe and I really love sad songs. He started that one and came up with the melodic structure of it. I say it was a surprise that we started writing together, but in a way it wasn’t cause we had always bonded over music and had the same musical tastes. He’s always the person who’s showing me songs by artists and then they become my favorite songs. ‘champagne problems’ was one of my favorite bridges to write. I really love a bridge where you tell the full story in the bridge. You really shift gears in that bridge. I’m so excited to one day be in front of a crowd, when they all sing, ‘She would’ve made such a lovely bride, what a shame she’s fucked in the head’. Cause I know it’s so sad, but it’s those songs like ‘All Too Well’. Performing that song is one of the most joyful experiences I ever go through when I perform live, so when there’s a song like ‘champagne problems’ where you know it’s so sad… I love a sad song, you know?

GOLD RUSH

During the willow live stream premiere, Taylor revealed that “gold rush” is Jack's favourite song and that it takes place inside a single daydream where you get lost in thought for a minute and then snap out of it.

[Jack] gold rush was a pretty different sound than what was on folklore. Even the movement in the chorus and some of the chord changes, they're very outside of the realm for what we've done together. We have different processes. Sometimes we sit in a room, sometimes she'll send me a song, sometimes I'll send her a track. That was one where I had the track going. And she did the classic thing where you send it to her, and a very short time later, she sent back a voice note with all of these brilliant ideas of what the song is.

'TIS THE DAMN SEASON

[Aaron] '‘tis the damn season' is a really special song to me for a number of reasons. When I wrote the music to it, which was a long time ago, I remember thinking that this is one of my favorite things I’ve ever made, even though it’s an incredibly simple musical sketch. But it has this arc to it, and there’s this simplicity in the minimalism of it, and the kind of drum programming in there, and I always loved the tone of that guitar. When Taylor played the track and sang it to me in my kitchen, that was a highlight of this whole time. That track felt like something I have always loved and could have just stayed music, but instead, someone of her incredible storytelling ability and musical ability took it and made something much greater. And it’s something that we can all relate to. [Note: The instrumental Aaron is talking about is called Ingrid and was written in 2013 when his daughter Ingrid Stella was born. It was released in 2018 on the album Songs Without Words.]

TOLERATE IT

[Taylor] When you watch a film or you read a book and there’s a character that you identify with, most of the time you identify with them because they’re targeting something in you that feels that you’ve been there. That’s why we relate to characters. When I was reading Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier I was thinking, ‘Her husband just tolerates her. She’s doing all these things, trying so hard to impress him and he’s just tolerating her the whole time.’ There was a part of me that could relate to that because at some point in my life I felt that way. So I ended up writing this song ‘tolerate it’ that’s all about trying to love someone who’s ambivalent.

[Aaron] When I wrote the piano track to 'tolerate it,' right before I sent it to her, I thought, 'This song is intense.' It’s in 10/8, which is an odd time signature. And I did think for a second, 'Maybe I shouldn’t send it to her, she won’t be into it.' But I sent it to her, and it conjured a scene in her mind, and she wrote this crushingly beautiful song to it and sent it back. I think I cried when I first heard it. It just felt like the most natural thing, you know? There weren’t limitations to the process. And in these places where we were pushing into more experimental sounds or odd time signatures, that just felt like part of the work.

CONEY ISLAND

[Taylor on coney island] “The story behind writing Coney Island - Aaron Dessner had sent me this track that he had created with his brother Bryce and I wrote the lyrics and the melody with William Bowery. I think I might have been coming from a place of somebody who’s been in a relationship for decades and wakes up one day and realizes that they have taken their partner completely for granted. So whether you wanna look at it from the perspective of somebody who’s in a new relationship or very long-standing relationship, I think it just really speaks to if people are trying to communicate but they’re two ships passing in the night, they’re trying to love each other but their signals are somehow missing each other - I just found that really interesting... and yeah, we’re really proud of this one. There were elements of it that immediately reminded me of Matt Berninger‘s vocal stylings and his writing, and I kind of targeted some of the lyrics of the second verse to sound sort of like what he might do - cause I hoped that he might sing on it. Because, you know, we already had two members of The National on the song, with Aaron and Bryce. So we got our wish and Matt sang on this song. I think he did an amazing job, I’m such a huge fan of the band and I’m really honored this was able to come together with The National.”

[Aaron on coney island] One key track on evermore, ‘coney island’, features all of the members of the National and sees Swift duetting with their singer Matt Berninger. “My brother [Bryce] actually originated that song,” says Aaron Dessner. “I sent him a reference at one point — I can’t remember what it was — and then he was sort of inspired to write that chord progression. Then we worked together to sort of develop it and I wrote a bunch of parts and we structured it. Taylor and William Bowery [the songwriting pseudonym of Swift’s boyfriend, actor Joe Alwyn] wrote ‘coney island’ and she sang a beautiful version. It felt kind of done, actually. But then I think we all collectively thought — Taylor and myself and Bryce — like this was the closest to a National song. Dessner then asked the brothers who make up the National’s rhythm section, drummer Bryan and bassist Scott Devendorf, to play on ‘coney island’. Matt Berninger, as he often does with the band’s own tracks, recorded his vocal at home in Los Angeles. “It was never in the same place, it was done remotely,” says Dessner, “except Bryan was here at Long Pond when he played. It was great to collaborate as a band with Taylor.”

MARJORIE

[Aaron] “Taylor’s family gave us a bunch of recordings of her grandmother,” Dessner explains. “But they were from old, very scratchy, noisy vinyl. So, we had to denoise it all using [iZotope’s] RX and then I went in and I found some parts that I thought might work. I pitch shifted them into the key and then placed them. It took a while to find the right ones, but it’s really beautiful to be able to hear her. It’s just an incredibly special thing, I think.”

EVERMORE

[Taylor] When Joe wrote the piano, I based the vocal melody on the piano, and we sent it to Justin, who then added that bridge. And Joe had written the piano part so that the tempo speeds up, and it changes. The music completely changes to a different tempo in the bridge. And Justin really latched onto that, and just 100% embraced it and wrote this beautiful sort of... The clutter of all your anxieties in your head, and they're all speaking at once. And we got the bridge back, and then I wrote this narrative of, 'When I was shipwrecked, I thought of you.' That sort of thing, where there was this beacon of hope, and then in the end, you realize the pain wouldn't be forever.

IT'S TIME TO GO

[Taylor] it’s time to go is about listening to your gut when it tells you to leave. How you always know before you know, you know?

Aaron Dessner, Jon Low, Stine Dessner and Taylor at Long Pond in September 2020.

October 6, 2020: Taylor and Paul McCartney get to chat for Rolling Stone. Taylor softly references tolerate it, ivy and willow.

Swift: I was reading so much more than I ever did, and watching so many more films. McCartney: What stuff were you reading? Swift: I was reading, you know, books like Rebecca, by Daphne du Maurier, which I highly recommend, and books that dealt with times past, a world that doesn’t exist anymore. I was also using words I always wanted to use — kind of bigger, flowerier, prettier words, like “epiphany,” in songs. I always thought, “Well, that’ll never track on pop radio,” but when I was making this record, I thought, “What tracks? Nothing makes sense anymore. If there’s chaos everywhere, why don’t I just use the damn word I want to use in the song?”

October 14, 2020: Jason Treuting records the glockenspiel on willow. (I got this date form the original willow stems)

October 28, 2020: Bryce Devendorf records the percussions on willow. (I got this date form the original willow stems)

October/November 2020: Aaron goes to see Justin Vernon in his home studio in Wisconsin, where they work on the album. Aaron writes the instrumental sketch to right where you left me before going on this trip.

[Aaron] I went to see Justin at one point — that’s the one trip I’ve made — and we worked together at his place on stuff. He plays the drums on “Cowboy Like Me” and “Closure,” and he plays guitar and banjo and sings on “Ivy,” and sings on “Marjorie” and “Evermore.” And then we processed Taylor’s vocals through his Messina chain together. He was really deeply involved in this record, even more so than the last record. He’s always been such a huge help to me, and not just by getting him to play stuff or sing stuff — I can also send him things and get his feedback. We’ve done a ton of work together, but we have different perspectives and different harmonic brains. He obviously has his own studio set up at home, but it was nice to be able to see him and work on this stuff.

November 4, 2020: Taylor shoots the evermore cover, the Red TV cover, and the EW photos. (I got this date from an insider)

November 7, 2020: Taylor films the willow music video. (I got this date from an insider)

November 20, 2020: Aaron records the bass on willow. (I got this date form the original willow stems)

November 25, 2020: Taylor is at Marcus Mumford's studio called Scarlet Pimpernel to finish evermore. They record vocals for two new songs, happiness and right where you left me, they touch up the vocals for coney island, they record Joe's piano on evermore the song, and Marcus records backing vocals on cowboy like me. She possibly stays more than one day.

Taylor has mentioned that you recorded “Happiness” just a week before the album was released. Was that something you guys wrote, recorded, and produced all at the last minute, or was it something you’d been sitting on for a while before you finally cracked the code? There were two songs like that. One is a bonus track called “Right Where You Left Me,” and the other one was “Happiness,” which she wrote literally days before we were supposed to master. That’s similar to what happened with Folklore, with “The 1” and “Hoax,” which she wrote days before. We mixed all the tracks here, and it’s a lot to mix 17 songs, it’s like a Herculean task. And it was funny, because I walked into the studio and Jon Low, our engineer here, was mixing and had been working the whole time toward this. And I came in and he’s in the middle of mixing and I was like, “There are two more songs.” And he looked at me like, “…We’re not gonna make it.” Because it does take a lot of time to work out how to finish them. But she sang those remotely. And the music for “Happiness” is something that I had been working on since last year. I had sang a little bit on it, too — I thought it was a Big Red Machine song, but then she loved the instrumental and ended up writing to it. Same with the other one, “Right Where You Left Me” — it was something I had written right before I went to visit Justin, because I thought, “Maybe we’ll make something when we’re together there.” And Taylor had heard that and wrote this amazing song to it. That is a little bit how she works — she writes a lot of songs, and then at the very end she sometimes writes one or two more, and they often are important ones.

[Taylor on cowboy like me] Take yourselves back to 2020, and I put out folklore, and I just kept writing. I thought, 'Let me make a sister album to folklore and call it evermore.' And so I started immediately. Aaron, Jack, and I were just writing remotely. And the challenge at the time was trying to figure out how to record things. Most studios were completely shut down due to Covid, understandably. I could not find a studio, essentially. So Aaron is like, 'Let me call around to see if there is anyone who is cool, and nice, and generous, and might be willing to offer up their home studio, if we do the right amount of testing, we're totally locked down, and quarantined.' And I was like, 'Okay, please, I really hope someone comes through.' And so he calls me ,'I have really really good news. Marcus Mumford said that you could record at his home studio.' So I first of all, I am so excited that he's saving us, because without this trip, we wouldn't have recorded five or six of the songs on evermore, which came from me getting in a car, driving six hours out into the country past thousands of beautiful sheep, to Marcus Mumford's beautiful house where he has a studio. So I got to do this, we get there, and the whole time I'm thinking, 'Okay, wouldn't it be so cool if he would sing on something?' Because I'm such a Mumford & Sons fan. I just think he's brilliant and has one of the most gorgeous voices in the world. So I'm like, 'Will he sing something, please?' But I didn't want to be weird about it, so I'm like, 'I wonder if fate will have him wander into the studio at the right time.' So sure enough, we're recording a song, and he wanders in at the perfect time and just kind of started humming a harmony. And I turned to him as if I hadn't been thinking of it the whole time, and I was like, 'Oh! You sound really good on that harmony! I wonder if you might sing on this song?' And he said, 'Yep, I would love to!' So essentially, because of Marcus Mumford we have a lot of the songs that probably we wouldn't have been able to put out evermore as quickly as we did. And we also have a gorgeous harmony on a song called 'cowboy like me.'

[Aaron] The music for happiness is something that I had been working on since last year. I had sang a little bit on it, too — I thought it was a Big Red Machine song, but then she loved the instrumental and ended up writing to it.

[Taylor] right where you left me is a song about a girl who stayed forever in the exact spot where her heart was broken, completely frozen in time.

Taylor at Scarlet Pimpernel Studios, and a signed sheet with cowboy like me lyrics which Taylor gave to Marcus Mumford.

December 3 & 4, 2020: Aaron works on willow for the final time, recording some synthesizers. (I got this date form the original willow stems)

[Aaron] On evermore, I would say willow was probably the hardest one to finish just because there were so many ways it could’ve gone. Eventually we settled back almost to the point where it began. So, there’s a lot of stuff that was left out of willow, just because the simplicity of the idea I think was in a way the strongest. It almost felt like a dare or something. We were writing, recording and mixing all in one kind of work stream and we went from one record to the other almost immediately. We were just sort off to the races. We didn’t really ever stop since April.

[Low] The final mix stage for evermore was “very short. There was a moment in the final week or so leading up to the release where the songs were developed far enough for me to sit down and try to make something very cohesive and final, finalising vocal volume, overall volume, and the vibe. There’s a point in every mix where the moves get really small. When a volume ride of 0.1dB makes a difference, you’re really close to being done. Earlier on, those little adjustments don’t really matter.

December 11, 2020: evermore is released.

With folklore, one of the main themes throughout that album was ‘conflict resolution’, trying to figure out how to get through something with someone, or making confessions, or trying to tell them something, trying to communicate with them. evermore deals a lot in endings of all sorts, shapes and sizes. All the kinds of ways we can end a relationship, a friendship, something toxic and the pain that goes along with that.

I have no idea what will come next. I have no idea about a lot of things these days and so I've clung to the one thing that keeps me connected to you all. That thing always has and always will be music. And may it continue, evermore.

[strawbby-shortcake]

★ COMFORT HEADCANONS (part 1)! ★ [with the fight club characters!]

: ̗̀➛ how they would treat you when you're sick

☁︎ TYLER DURDEN

Tyler would be there for you literally 24/7. You want something to eat? He'll get it for you. Tired? He'll make the bed nice and comfy for you to lay on. He's literally the definition of "acts of service."

He's not a germaphobe. There's no way. He digs into liposuction dumpsters, so a little sickness isn't going to freak him out. He'll be glued by your side and even let you sleep on him.

If you refuse his kisses because you don't want to get him sick, he'll just kiss your cheek or your forehead all the time.

He's the type to hold your hair or rub your back if you start throwing up. He won't look at you, tease you, or make jokes. Even though it's in his nature to be a bit of a jackass, he's super kind in those moments.

While he believes rest is important, he'll make you get out of bed and get some sunshine. It doesn't have to be for long, but you have to at least go outside for fresh air.

He most definitely told the Fight Club members/Space Monkeys to leave him the fuck alone while he was gone taking care of you.

☁︎ JACK (THE NARRATOR)

This poor baby doesn't really know what to do at first since he's never really taken care of someone before. He tries his best though! However, he'll panic if you start coughing a lot because he thinks you're dying.

Once he's got the hang of it, he's a really good caretaker! He'll offer you tissues, blankets, and any other essentials you need. He will also offer to sit with you and put on your favorite show or read to you.

Unlike Tyler, this guy is a bit of a germaphobe, but that's because his immune system is so weak since he doesn't get enough sleep. He won't really kiss you or hug you for long periods of time, but he won't ignore you either. Maybe you'll get a quick forehead or knuckle kiss.

He'll take time off from his job and Fight Club to be at home with you. You're more important to him than anything else.

He will cry if you throw up. And he'll probably gag and throw up too. Just saying.

If you find yourself unable to sleep comfortably, he'll eventually snuggle with you. A week later, you'll be the one taking care of him because he got sick.

☁︎ MARLA SINGER

Marla doesn't realize that you're sick until a few days later. You know her, she's a bit sporadic at times. When she eventually gets home and sees you pale and coughing, her mothering nature kicks in.

She makes sure you're fed, hydrated, and well rested. She won't leave you alone- not even for 10 minutes. If she has to run out to get something though, she makes you promise that you'll stay in bed.

Marla only cares about you getting better, so she ignores everyone else. She'll have like 15 missed calls, but she doesn't mind. They could wait.

Under her care and supervision, you get better within a week! Marla knows how to take care of people, so it's only natural that she knew how to take care of you.

She does ask for a pack of cigarettes as a "thanks." That's all she wants- oh, and Twizzlers.

She tells you to wear your sweater wherever you go so you don't catch a cold again.

☁︎ ROBERT "BOB" PAULSON

He always has cough drops in his pockets, so he'll offer some to you. There's a variety of flavors to choose from. (His personal favorite is vanilla honey.)

Bob is the type of person to carry you to and from bed, place cold/hot washcloths on your forehead, and attend to your every need.

He'll let you cry in his shirt if you feel extremely sick. He might cry too, but that's just Bob being Bob.

He makes the BEST chicken noodle soup, there's no doubt about it. You'll be having a bowl of it at least twice a day.

He might bring you to the support groups while you're sick so that you get to experience the meditation part of it.

Probably spoon feeds you too.

☁︎ ANGEL FACE

He writes you a "get well soon" card and leaves it on your nightstand.

An extreme germaphobe. He won't go anywhere near you.

Okay so maybe he goes to check on you ONCE...or twice...okay maybe he's really worried about you so now he won't stop checking on you.

Holds your hand and pouts because you're not well enough to give him attention.

Gives you strawberry-flavored cough medicine.

Gets "sick" after you recover because he wants to be taken care of.

[cairavende]

Worm Arc 14 thoughts from 14.8 through the end:

Gonna get a little bit gay up in here pretty soon. But first, some other stuff.

Pretty much jump right into "Oh shit everything is fucked" with the bio-weapon just spreading everywhere right away.

Skitter's focus on Tattletale specifically when trying to get them to higher ground was top level Chatterbug/Smugbug content. Like sure Sundancer and Trickster too, she wanted to save them. But when Bentley wasn't climbing fast enough what she said to herself in worry was "Tattletale."

Fucking god. Tattletale telling Skitter to fly to the higher building and use bugs so Trickster could teleport them and they'd follow? But fully knowing it wouldn't work and just trying to get Skitter to safety?

"It doesn’t look like her plan will work out. Tell her I’m sorry." - I WAS FUCKING BAWLING

I had figured that Bonesaw's contingency wasn't just a "everyone dies right now" virus or whatever. It would need to be artistic. And it would need to be a punishment to the local capes, both hero and villain. And the way to punish them would be to "take the city from them". "Make them watch it destroy itself." "Make them help".

I feel like what she did covered that general outline with a heavier focus on taking everything away from the capes. But still, god damn Bonesaw. Absolutely fucking terrifying. Super powered face blindness. At the base at least. Don't know who anyone is. Damn.

SKITTER IT'S NOT GAY YET THAT ISN'T TATTLETALE IT'S BONESAW! GAY WILL COME LATER!

If Jack put's his slimy fucking hands on my daughter again I will personally remove them.

The "Don't swear!" from Bonesaw while pretending to be Tattletale was fun. I managed to hit on it before that, but it was a good confirmation.

Fucking Jack and his "You’re versatile" after seeing Skitter make decoys while prepping to tie someone up with spiders. FUCK OFF WITH YOUR DREAMS YOU DICK. YOU CAN'T HAVE HER.

Instantly confirmed when Skitter flat refused to shoot someone despite Jack and Bonesaw telling her to. My daughter might not be perfect but she's not going to be one of you!

Coil fucked up a bit on the phone. He wasn't dealing with the pathogen so he should have done better. Even just asking everyone there to say something so he could listen to the voices. He would have known right away it wasn't Tattletale and Grue. Patching them through to Cherish that easily was a mistake. He really doesn't do as much as he could be. Like ya he's evil but that doesn't mean I'm not disappointed when he isn't using his full potential.

Cherish very fucked up when she thought letting Jack and Bonesaw know where she was would be good for her. Hope she likes her eternal torment at the bottom of the ocean. (Ok there's a chance she'll get pulled out in the future I guess.)

I'll admit, when Amy left with Victoria earlier I wasn't expecting to see them again so soon.

"Panacea is the healer, top floor, Jack is the slasher, the blond girl is the chemist-tinker." I don't know why, since it doesn't rhyme or anything, but I got very "The pellet with the poison's in the flagon with the dragon; the vessel with the pestle has the brew that is true" vibes from this.

Jack trying to convince Amy by talking about how many of her ancestors were successful by being cruel and Taylor just internally going "How many were successful because they cooperated?" Love my daughter.

Victoria is still very much . . . not dead.

HOLY SHIT AMY YOU PUT YOUR SISTER IN A PERSONALIZED FLESH COFFIN MADE FROM CATS AND DOGS?

Seriously. Personalized. It has her face on the outside made out of bone. What the actual fuck Amy?

Proud of my daughter for shooting Jack, even if it didn't work.

It's probably fine that Skitter got Amy to break her brain rule again. I mean like it's good. It was the only way to fix the pathogen. It saved herself and the city. That is all good. Just . . . there might also be some long term negative outcomes. Probably fine though.

Getting gets cured and goes off to cure the city be gay.

"I leaned forward and planted a quick kiss on her lips." - EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!

GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!

WOLFSPIDER WOLFSPIDER WOLFSPIDER!

SO FUCKING GAY I LOST MY FUCKING MIND WHEN IT HAPPENED

"'You couldn’t have waited until after you’d cured me before you put the bugs on your face?' Tattletale asked. She was smiling as she asked it." - ALSO EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!

SO GAY. DOUBLE GAY. EXTRA GAY. ALL THE GAY!

CHATTERBUGCHATTERBUGCHATTERBUG (SMUGBUG IS FINE TOO)!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Also the level of effort the girls went through after that trying to figure out how to cure Grue and Regent without kissing? Fucking amazing. Kissing was only ok for these three. Obviously.

GAAAAAAY

Gay (bug)horse girl gay (bug)horse girl gay (bug)horse girl

And the remainder of the Nine got away. Which is pretty fucking bad I guess. What with the whole "end of the world" and all that. I get that story point is the *actual* big end of the arc. But it's been overshadowed. By the gays.

Did I mention things being gay? I just want to make sure. Cause they were. Gay that is.

Interlude 1 - Sierra is amazing. She is exactly who Skitter needs to be running things while she's away. Charlotte is also amazing and I think worships the ground Skitter walks on. My daughter is, as always, absolutely terrifying when described from anyone else's PoV. She only gets more so every time. She just uses bug speak without even realizing now. Amazing. I love her. Atlas is helping and I'm so proud of him. He even got to take the gun. I hope he gets to keep it.

Interlude 2 (thought about making this it's own post but I'll just keep it really simple) - God dammit all three of the big 3 are Cauldron created? Ugh. Legend you appear to be trying to do the right thing but you sure as shit aren't paying much attention are you? Holy shit like, you believed so much of what the Doctor has been saying for years? God damn bud. How could you look at Cauldron and assume they *aren't* doing human experimentation? Especially since you know they have done it in the past! Like god damn man! At least you do kind of acknowledge that maybe you were purposefully ignoring the signs cause you wanted to be ignorant. Maybe there is a little bit of hope for you. Hell of a lore dump interlude though. Gives me lots to think about. Also I'd absolutely listen to The Number Man talk about spreadsheets all day long.

GAY

[valle-de-sombra-de-muerte]

Homestuck Reread: Act 4, Part 2/4 (p. 1523-1668)

Read the previous post here.

Time to finish the first half of Act 4. I can't believe how long this is compared to the previous ones, and the upcoming Acts will only get more expansive from here on.

Rose has to be doing this on purpose. Using big words she knows John won't understand. She's stroking her own ego by acting intellectually superior to someone who might genuinely be mentally impaired.

Rose is still seething about Dave. John clearly has no idea what's going on between them and thinks she's perturbed by Dave being able to watch her constantly. But yeah nah, she's still bitter about how she barely survived entering the game (and jealous that Dave is schmoozing with Jade).

In Terezi's first appearance, she has nothing but animosity toward the humans. She even goes as far to say that she'll be pissed at them even when the rest of the trolls warm up to them. Uh huh. Strange how that part of her personality gets quickly swept off to the side.

Terezi used to be such a nasty, annoying edgelord and I kind of miss that about her. Her character progression is honestly all over the place, which I'll get into deeper as we move along.

Rose drinking the martini is framed as her making an "important decision [...] without supervision." There's something to be said about how one of the first things she decides to do as an independent person is try to emulate her mother. As the only adult presence in her life, Mom is her only frame of reference for how adults behave.

PM's brief encounter with Jack is fun. Jack is no-nonsense and knows his job inside and out. He's also determined to pursue every opportunity to avoid actually doing said job.

So much suspense is being built around this package. It's so important that PM is willing to betray her own kingdom for it. Of course, this all amounts to probably one of the worst reveals in the whole comic. There's no satisfaction upon learning what's in the box and as soon as the reveal happens, it's swiftly forgotten about. Yet there's so much narrative weight being assigned to it that I cannot even begin to fathom what Hussie's thought process was when writing this.

Dave and Jade spend several pages combining the alchemiter with the other Sburb devices. This is to condense everything into one space so the characters don't have to scurry from the different devices to craft items. But we haven't been seeing much scurrying lately since Hussie has been skipping over the crafting process anyway, probably because it's lengthy and repetitive. It may be convenient "in-universe" but I don't see what use this has from a storytelling perspective.

There's a reason "John do what I say" is a bit of a meme. Because he will follow commands no matter who's issuing them. Even if it's someone as unpleasant as Terezi.

Terezi is transparent in her motives. She is uninterested with what the rest of the trolls are doing and just wants to spread chaos in the kids' session, basically fucking around and finding out. John still decides to follow her directions because ????????

I might as well screencap the entire conversation between Dave and Rose here because it's great stuff. Rose puts on a sanctimonious act about killing the ogre she had just mercilessly thrashed, all to annoy Dave. This is the kind of back and forth I love to read.

Also note the metaphors Dave uses at the beginning. "whipping that ogre like a rented mule"? "sailing that ogre down the mississippi with a runaway slave"? Again, not to bring race discourse here, but I don't think he'd say that kind of stuff to Rose if she was black. If anything, he'd probably be more tasteless about the metaphors he's using. You know how teenagers can be.

Did he just call himself Rose's pimp? 😳

Hmm I wonder what might motivate Dave to give Kanaya bogus advice about winning over Rose. Between this and his earlier log where he turns the tables on Tavros, I do think it's interesting how Dave is shown to consistently out-troll the trolls. The key must be to not give a shit.

Dave calls Kanaya "bro" twice in this log and seems to mistake her as a man here. John will repeat this mistake later on. Kinda odd that the troll the fandom depicts as sultry and feminine is actually super stoic and awkward to the point where multiple characters think she is male.

I love how Rose is making passive-aggressive remarks about Dave to a total stranger. And calling him "that guy" as if he isn't living rent-free in her head.

Rose is getting a lot of joy out of using Tavros as a proxy to annoy Dave. She even offers to help him out in writing disses (because of course she'll jump at any opportunity to write).

I really love the ending of this log too.

Kanaya is a total dork in case it isn't clear already.

Tavros puts so much effort in his diss rhyme against Dave, but Dave's completely ignoring him to draw more SBaHJ. Tavros never attempts to troll Dave after this which, again, is a fucking disgrace.

Where is the version of Homestuck where Tavros is Dave's bumbling pupil in the slam poetry arts, constantly brushed off until Dave eventually (and reluctantly) decides to take him under his wing, if only to stop him from embarrassing himself? It would be a good role-reversal where Dave inherits Bro's position of the master instead of the student, and maybe get some perspective for why Bro was so dismissive and distant from him all the time.

I guess this kind of obvious character growth is too much of an advanced writing technique for Hussie to implement, so he didn't.

I like how Karkat starts off being a jerk but stops in his tracks because he too is a fan of cheesy movies. Also, I liked Serendipity. It's not great, but it might as well be a masterpiece compared to a lot of the garbage John likes.

Terezi's reaction makes it seem like she really wants to see Karkat's "bone lump." I can't imagine Karkat being outwardly flirty at all, so the idea that he may have expressed any kind of fondness for her must be something she has to read herself.

As a sprite, Jaspers' personality is like a cat voicing thoughts relating to his natural instincts. He focuses mostly on food and expressing affection toward Rose. Anything else he says, like information about the game, is stuff he says without any comprehension of what it means. It's like the game placed that knowledge in his mind and he just thoughtlessly repeats it. I do like that.

The closure Rose expected from Jaspers is about what one would expect (or at least, until her dream self awakens). I wonder what she really expected from asking a cat what it meant by meowing at her.

It only took over 1300 pages, but John has finally responded to one of Dave's messages. He does this in a very detached, oblivious manner, not mentioning the previous messages Dave sent him that he missed. He wants to skip all that time when Dave was in distress and ask only about the recent happenings upon his entry.

I feel bad for Dave, considering his "best friend" is pretty much a plank of wood. And not the fun kind of plank like in Ed, Edd n Eddy.

In what might be the most poignant page of the comic in my honest opinion, Dave and Rose have been trapped in this doomed timeline for four months. Dave is keen to stop wasting any further time and to go back to the past to reverse the actions that led to John's death, but Rose seems very reluctant to let him go. Her words are chosen to imply Dave might be too hasty and to suggest that he should stick around a little while longer "to gather information."

But that isn't the real aim of why Rose wants Dave to stay. She knows that as soon as he leaves, she will die. Trapped in a universe where she's the sole surviving human, it's a cold and lonely death she'll experience. Dave seems to know this too, but tries to assuage her worries by telling her not to think about her impending doom. Perhaps he also doesn't want to think about it, and that's why he wants to leave quickly so as not to dwell on how he's essentially condemning her to death.

But really, four months alone together as the last two humans in existence? That's a lot of off-screen time we aren't shown. And yet it's treated as this brief afterthought, a scene only used as a means to bring Davesprite into existence. I wish we could've seen more of this doomed timeline, more of Dave and Rose realizing their hopeless situation and the harrowing choice they ultimately need to make to set things right.

Yes, it's only a brief page that never gets brought up again, but it's one that sticks in my mind and refuses to leave.

John is being unreasonably (and uncharacteristically) obstinate here. Normally he has no problem following orders unless they place him in direct harm. Why does he trust Terezi so much over his supposed best friend? He ends the log suggesting that he'll listen to Dave, but the next page shows him blasting off anyway. What a prick.

People want to portray Terezi as some master strategist, but she really isn't. She's very single-minded and only ever considers outside information if it aligns with her set goal.

Remember when Terezi said she intended to stay pissed at all the kids forever? That didn't last long. And now through the power of memes, Davesprite has turned Terezi into a good guy now.

Considering how weak most of Homestuck's villains are, it's a real shame we lost out on one who was genuinely effective, engaging, and menacing so soon.

Oh, so I guess the Frog Temple really was "planted" when the meteor first hit Earth ages ago. I'm not sure how satisfied I am with this explanation.

[S] Jack: Ascend not only serves as a big flash to mark the midpoint for Act 4, but it also celebrates the fact that Homestuck turned one year old at this point.

Anyway, Jack's "Joker moment" is when the Queen force-femmed him. Just thought everyone should know that.

So if John's big "awakening" moment was about learning that his dad isn't really a clown, Rose's moment was triggered by being left all alone in a dead timeline and just waiting for the universe to extinguish her life. These are very comparable events! The fact that Rose's future dream self is shown to merge with her present self means that she likely remembers the events of the doomed timeline as well. What a nice load of trauma to be shouldered with!

Here we get the only time the box's contents have any real use: when it turns the Black Queen into soot and blood. Good to know that this MacGuffin only ever serves the villain in a meaningful capacity.

This part of the comic had some good moments, but I'm conflicted. When I revisit these "high points" in the story, I'm reminded of how Hussie never expands upon them and how they just end up as wasted potential. I fear this will set the mood for the remainder of this reread, which kinda sucks honestly. I'd much rather talk about more positive stuff and things I like, but they're few and far between with all the negativity surrounding them.

Read the next post here.

[mrsbluehands]

The creeps and their ice cream!

Headcanon (x reader)

Creepypasta

Silly Headcanon I had in mind. Who doesn't like ice-cream? (No offense if you don't XD)

Tw: none

Pronouns: Gn

-

Jeff the killer: He's a classic. Chocolate. Or well anything with chocolate. He's a little shameful about it since it reminds him of his childhood when he and Liu would run after the ice-cream truck to get their sweet treats. You can ask to share, but not sure he'll ever give up on his ice-cream.

Eyeless Jack: He can't have ice-cream (it's a monster thing), but I'm pretty sure that if he could he would be as simple as vanilla. He likes the smell of it when you eat yours. Would of course buy you one every time he goes out. He finds it funny when you get some on your nose and cheeks.

BEN drowned: Bubble gum. He's still a child at heart and this colourful ice-cream is making him nostalgic. Please give him one and cheer him up. He'll soon associate his favourite ice-cream with the quality time he can spend with you.

Masky: Mint and chocolate. It's taste is fresh and a little bitter. It reminds him of the cold air of the forest in winter and his long walks with you on his rare days off. He's not a fan of sweetness, but loves the bitterness of the dark chocolate. Will always buy you one too so you can enjoy the moment with him.

Hoodie: Caramel syrup (no. Not because of the colour of his hoodie) with vanilla ice-cream. He likes when the caramel is hot and melts the cold ice cream under. He can eat his ice-cream all year long, this man is never cold. He surprisingly has a sweet tooth, but you're the only one who's aloud to know. If you eat it in the winter, he's wrap his arms around you so you don't get too cold while eating your cold dessert.

Ticci Toby: He's also a chocolate lover but especially chocolate chips. Just a fan of sweet things (unlike Masky). It makes him forget how life is hard sometimes. Will totally feed it to you, but you are both laughing as he gets some everywhere on you face, but on your tongue. At the end you'll both end up with ice-cream in your hair, nose and on your face, but it's a moment you both cherish.

Liu Woods: Vanilla, but he likes when there's a special flavour on the menu too! Doesn't like to take decisions so he always took the same flavour when he went to the ice-cream truck with his brother. When you two eat ice-cream, he asks you to pick something to add on top of the treat. Will trust you blindly, so please don't play with him (Like that time when you convinced him that pickles were good with vanilla, he did accept your apology though).

Jane the killer: (For the aesthetic) Black vanilla. She just loves to colour and the natural scent of vanilla. Nothing to do with the artificial one! If you buy one for her, she'll probably just look at it and won't take a bite because of how pretty it looks. Nothing compares to you though no worries!

Bloody painter: The king of aesthetic, he loves red ice-cream whether it's cherry, raspberry, blueberry... anything as long as it's red he like it. Not much of a sweet tooth, but like the taste of fruits a lot. He might even try to paint with it (spoiler: it won't work). His favourite way to enjoy his treat is with you. If you squint you will probably be able to witness one of his rare smiles as he shyly reaches for you hand.

Clockwork: Any flavour. She is the type to go for the weird limited one that changes once a week even if it sounds disgusting. She's a dangerous woman, what can I say. For that reason, you probably won't be sharing (unless it's really terrible, then you feel bad seeing her face each time she takes a lick). Will also put some on your nose just to have the excuse to lick it off. She thinks you are adorable when you blush.<3

-

Seems like I had inspiration for that one! Hope you enjoyed!

[helyiios]

As an Ilsa fan what I don't get about people demanding to know when she'll be back is that Rebecca wanted out. Like. I don't like everything about HOW Ilsa's death was handled, but WHY she died makes sense. That movie it made sense to have a fan favorite die and Rebecca Ferguson wanted out, so of course it was gonna be Ilsa? Yes they've had characters come back before but this is a case where that doesn't make sense.

And again, most importantly, Rebecca wanted out. She was offered more and declined. They didn't just decide "oh let's off Ilsa" out of nowhere, it was a response both to Rebecca declining to stay on for further movies and the plot of the movie itself making a fan favorite death to raise the stakes make sense. I get being sad because I am too, and as I said there are some things about the "how" that I thought could've been handled better, but she's dead. And it makes sense that she is. And I don't know how you can both be a fan of Rebecca and then demand Mission brings Ilsa back when it was Rebecca's choice to leave because she didn't want to do Mission anymore.

That probably makes you the most reasonable Ilsa stan out there lol. I love Ilsa to bits, I think her character is a billion times more nuanced than any Bond girl or whatnot, and Rebecca was a breath of fresh air to the franchise. But, it's as you said—as an actor she wanted out, and she has a few new projects coming out soon, like SILO for example, she's been in DUNE...

Overall, it's the Ilsa fans who butchered her characterization, they want her to be a "girl boss" next to Ethan, but the fact is, she's never needed Ethan in her team and she never will. She's a lone character who wanted out of the spy life, and when she finally understands that she can save someone, that she can be something other than a lonesome spy, well, she does so. And yeah, I hated how they handled her death, it was less than what she deserved, and also, I find Grace impossibly boring.

Nonetheless, Ethan and M:I aren't all about depending on Ilsa. Like you said, no it wouldn't make sense that she'd come back. Would it make sense for Jack to come back? Alan? No. Exactly. Brandt? Sure. Jane? Of course! Not Ilsa. Ilsa's dead and gone, but the Rebecca fans are blinded by their need to reshape their narrative to realize that.

Also I wouldn't be shocked if she was annoyed by the fact that Ilsa's being forcefully shipped with Ethan while she has been saying that she doesn't like it, and explicitly told McQ not to keep the kissing scenes in the movies because it felt OOC.

[assorted-candy]

20 Q's for Fic Writers

I got tagged by @dp-marvel94! Thank you!

1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 

I've just posted my 22nd work a few days ago!

2. What's your total Ao3 word count?

37,763

3. What fandoms do you write for?

So far, all my published fics are for Danny Phantom. It's a fandom that's near and dear to my heart and my favorite to write for. I've written fanfiction for myself in a lot of different fandoms over the years. Miraculous Ladybug, Mega Man (Star Force, Battle Network) and Fire Emblem are a few. (Will these ever see the light of day? Probs not, lol)

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?  5. Frayed Ends - 37 kudos - Jazz and Maddie are fighting more often. Jack wants to reach out and help his family. 4. The Same Blood - 45 kudos - Maddie and Jack try to help a sick girl that collapsed in front of their house. They don't know what to make of her condition. Danny wants to help.

3. Returned Home - 49 kudos - Maddie finds Danny at home after he disappeared ten months ago.

2. The Broken Pieces Left Behind - 66 kudos (tie) - Maddie knew what the portal did to Danny. If she could create something that essentially turned him into a ghost, she could figure out a way to fix all of it. Even if she hasn't made any progress in the past two months, she'll keep trying. She didn't account for what Danny wanted. 1 . What's Out of Out Control - 66 kudos (tie) - Danny thought he had it under control. He thought he could finally hang out like they used to always do. Tucker could feel the rift between them widening. It wasn't getting smaller anytime soon.

5. Do you respond to comments?

I try to! There were a few comments from my two earlier fics that I never responded to and it's already been so long and I feel like I ended up putting it off too long to say anything now 😓But I'm so so thankful for all the comments I receive! I never thought anyone would read my work, let alone comment on it. I'm always between two modes of 'author commentary' and 'screaming thank you and running away'.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Lol, I love my angsty stuff and there are so many different flavors of angst, so it's hard to pick just one. I'd say the piece I aimed to write for Angst Fest, The Broken Pieces Left Behind, might be it. It ends on a rather hopeless note for the Fenton family that even I don't know how to make everything better for them

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Probably Home for a Cat. It was for a Ectoberhaunt prompt that I was absolutely stumped on. So I decided someone was going to adopt a cat by the end of the fic.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Ahh, so I actually posted a fic on FFN wayyy back when I was in high school. I remember it being received pretty well but I got a really rude comment on a simple spelling mistake. Back then, I was just told I had dyslexia a few years prior and I had some really bad self-esteem issues tied in with that. So, yeah, that comment basically made me terrified to ever show my work to anyone ever.

It's been over ten years since then and I wanted to actually get over that fear. I impulsively decided to do Angst Fest with the mindset that no one would even look at what I posted. Not only did people look, everyone has been so kind!!!

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

lkdajldkf, nope. I get flustered trying to write basic romance and having two characters hold hands, lmao. Major props to those that can, it's definitely a skill that takes time to master just like any other genre.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I haven't.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Also haven't had this either.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nope, but it seems like a lot of fun.

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

Back when the show was airing, Amethyst Ocean (Danny/Sam) was my go to. I'm a sucker for friends to lovers tropes and it's really nostalgic for me. But, I don't really read a lot of shippy things for Danny Phantom, so ships don't make or break a fic for me.

If I'm looking to read romance, the whole Love Square (MariChat my beloved) with Miraculous Ladybug will always be great. Even if I jumped ship on the show around season 2 or 3 and I have no clue what they're doing now, lol.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I honestly have so many WIPs that are unfinished on my computer from over the years. Maybe a super old one that I titled 'Phantoms in the Daylight'. Angst once more with Character Death as the main pain point. I like the beginning but oh boy, does it get sloppy and confusing real quick. I'd need serious outlining energy put into it if I'd ever want to salvage it and I just don't have it in me.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue! Give me two blorbos and I'll make them talk forever.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Scenery and description. I love the dialogue portion so much that I end up running into the floating heads in an empty room problem in the first drafts of my fics. My first round of edits are dedicated to making sure I have a scene and grounding characters into it. And then I have to go back later to make it not feel so robotic sounding.

(Also a weakness but more as in fic than writing. Summaries and Titles. I stare at my drafts on AO3's editor for at least half an hour trying to pull something together, lol)

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I can probably talk about this for hours, lol. I absolutely love foreign languages, especially when it comes to linguistics. So, I'll try to be brief, lmao. Short answer: depends on the fic but normally no. I already spend so much time fussing over the word choice/slang/formality/dialect characters use in my native language. I don't have a good enough grasp on another language for it to sound natural to the reader. ("They would not fucking say that" is my internal monologue during dialogue edits, lol)

19. First fandom you wrote for?

It's a toss up between Pokemon and Danny Phantom. I first learned about fanfiction from a friend who showed me FFN for the Pokemon fics. I looked around the site and found all of the Danny Phantom fics soon after and got hooked on those. I started writing around then and it would have been for one of those two.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

Hard to chose one! Writing technicality wise, I'm proud of how What Remains on the Table turned out. I consider description my weak point, so the original draft was 0 dialogue with very stiff descriptions. I was able to edit it to really practice my environmental storytelling. (Although, please mind the tags if you click the link as it does deal with the dissection topic)

I'm not sure who's been tagged and I'm not sure who writes fanfic, so @lavendarlily, @fangirlwriting-stories, @grub-xd, @nanaarchy and anyone else that wants to join!

[ma1dmer]

League of Legends - Samira NSFW

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex): not the best at aftercare, she is very likely to leave you the second you two are done for a job or something, nothing personal, she’ll kiss your cheek and lips and promise to be back as soon as she can

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s): she loves watching you two together, wants to prop up a mirror so she can properly watch your body react to her, wants to trail her nails down your stomach and watch you shiver ,wants to see the way your eyes roll to the back of your head when she puts her fingers to work , she’ll coo and moan in your ear about how gorgeous you look together and tell you to keep your eyes on her the entire time otherwise she will stop (she won't)

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person): likes tasting herself on your lips when you two make out

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs): kind of a masochist, she likes the feeling of your nails digging into her back when she pleasures you and likes when you bite down hard enough to leave a mark, she'll definitely show all of these little marks off to others

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?): she has a lot of experience and likes to be challenged on it just so she can prove you wrong, to show off how skilled she is at making you become putty for her 

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual): against a wall, she wants to either wrap herself around you as you hold her up, or show off her strength by slamming you against the wall herself

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc): she is very playful, a lot of cheesy pick up lines during foreplay to lighten up the mood

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.): she likes to trim everything but a small patch above her slit 

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…): she can be very romantic before and/or after, but during sex she feels like it just ruins the moment, sex for her is something more casual or transactional,its all about pleasure, that being said she is very passionate and can definitely make you blush if you ask her to be more romantic with you

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon): would prefer to have company rather than taking care of things herself, will avoid jacking off and gets extremely cranky if she doesn't get laid

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks): sadomasochism, mirror sex, exhibitionism etc

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do): she doesn’t have much shame, she’ll pull you just about everywhere if you are comfortable, definitely the type to ask someone walking in on you to stay for the show or join in, probably has a bucket list of the places she's thought of taking you, double entendre 

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going): she likes being wanted, wants you to show her exactly how much she affects you ,she'll tease you about it ,but won't leave you hanging, she is also very into victory sex, every good job is a reason to celebrate with the coin she acquired and later with you in her bed 

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs): not much she wouldn't try out at least once

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc): loves wrapping her thighs around your head and simply using you like that, grinding against your tongue until you tap out 

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.): fast and rough, she wants to be slapped or wants to choke you, its always a power struggle for her

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.): loves them, in the shadowed corners of a shady bar, or in some alley , she's always pulling you with a giggle and mischief in her eye

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.): loves trying out new things to keep your sex life interesting

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…): its often that you don't see her for weeks, just disappearing randomly ,so whenever you two do spend time together she'll make sure to thoroughly wreck you ,both to satiate her needs after being away for so long, and to make sure you remember how good she is to you for the next time she leaves

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?): she doesn’t see the reason for them personally, but she does make a point of telling you to think of her when you use them

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease): a big tease, she’ll run her fingers up and down her glass, dipping her fingers in the cup with obvious implication or she'll purr into your ear about how she'll have you crawling for her later, its a game and she is definitely winning

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make): she likes hearing herself as much as she likes hearing you, loud and isn't shy about being heard

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice): loves some gun and knife play to spice things up, will hold a blade againgst your throat as she grinds herself against your thigh pointedly avoiding touching you where you need her the most

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?): she has a high libido a lot of energy and a lot of cockiness, its an explosive cocktail

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards): she’ll quietly slip into your room long after you’ve fallen asleep and after she finished her work and silently let herself into your bed 

[paintedvanilla]

Hi! Sorry if you’ve already answered this, but what inspired your takes on Jack’s extended family in your fics?

hi!! sorry it took me so long to answer this ask, i was going to wait to answer it until i finished my most recent fic, but then i posted that and i just. didn't have the energy. so!! hi!!

i don't really have a specific source of inspiration for my choices about the narrator's extended family. i've always enjoyed writing ensemble stuff. i think my decisions for the narrator's family dynamics were based on my own interpretations of his characterization and influenced by my own biases and probably other various subconscious trains of thought happening in my brain. but nevertheless here's a breakdown of each decision!!

his mother: the narrator was raised by a single mom from the age of six onward, that much is obvious from the source material. i mostly work off of the film, because i've watched it so many times its details are more readily available for me to recall. i get the sense that his mom is no nonsense but also a bit of a pushover when she doesn't feel like putting up a fight, which is often. she was not the most attentive but that's not entirely fair to say because she was a single mom. i think the narrator's family was quite poor growing up, especially once his dad left, and she was working to support him and his sister. i think she's relatively soft spoken and quite reserved.

his father: obviously for this one i had way more of a base to work with, just based on the way the narrator talks about his dad in the film and the book. he's an asshole. he doesn't really give a fuck about the narrator. i do believe the narrator and his sister were this man's first kids. he did not marry their mother. he's never married any of the women he gets involved with. i think he's a scumbag. the narrator is, actually, genuinely, his only son. all his other kids are girls, which i think plays a huge factor in when he skips town. it has to do both with when the woman he's involved with starts to become boring to him, and when the oldest daughter he's fathered from this particular woman starts to like. become conscious and develop a personality. The whole:

"Often father and daughter look down on mother (woman) together. They exchange meaningful glances when she misses a point. They agree that she is not bright as they are, cannot reason as they do. This collusion does not save the daughter from the mother’s fate."

the sister: i chose for the narrator to have a sister, particularly an older sister, because i examined his character and something about me just led me to the conclusion that he FEELS like a younger brother to an older sister. she's about two years older than him. she's really good at pretending to enjoy herself. where the narrator utilizes apathy as a coping mechanism for the Everything about being alive, his sister swings hard in the other direction and uses enthusiasm and toxic positivity. i have more i'd like to explore with her, i think she definitely has the capacity to be more insane, and i think the narrator would love to see that. they have a relationship where, as soon as she was old enough to talk endlessly about any given subject, she would use the narrator as an audience. especially when they were teenagers. she could talk at him for hours while he sat in silence and afterwards she'd be like, "ok good talk" and he'd just give her a thumbs up. he knows she'll be back, same time tomorrow. it doesn't bother him. and i think he does listen, sometimes, halfway, he retains some of the details. after he moved for his job, she would call him and continue to do the same thing, and he didn't mind because he doesn't have a lot else going on. he doesn't have any friends. no one else is calling him. she stopped doing it after she got married because now she had a husband to subject to this, but now that she's getting divorced i think the narrator will be hearing from her more. also, he walked her down the aisle at her wedding. and five minutes before he did this, he told her that if she didn't want to go through with it, he'd help her leave her fiance at the alter. she played it off like he was making a bad joke, but he was being 100% dead serious.

the brother-in-law: i made the decision for the brother in law to just be fucking. lame. because i thought it would be funny if the narrator's sister is married to just like. the pinnacle of everything the narrator never wants to be. like, the narrator is also lame, but at least the narrator is having good sex and is getting the shit beat out of him on the regular and doesn't actually believe in any of the mission statements of his company. the bil is like the polar opposite of tyler, and the narrator thinks no one should settle for less. he's always hated his bil, has a vague inclination that his sister deserves better, but is still consumed by apathy so has never really done anything about it.

the nephew: the nephew is probably the least developed out of everyone here, which is really ironic because my idea for his character is basically that. he has a lot of the same ambitions that the narrator and his sister originally had, but is putting more of the sister's energy into it. that is, until he gets to college and completely fucking spins out. he drops out after one semester and becomes addicted to smoking weed. he'd be a walking panic attack otherwise. i think he made himself so sick about what he wanted to do with his life he just gave up. now he works at a smoke shop and is almost always high.

the niece, aka danny: i have to thank @rabbitmotifs for really pushing me into developing this little menace. when i first wrote "the idolatry of suburbia" i wanted to keep everything really light and vague because i was not ready to come to terms with the fact that these are technically oc's. but holly really pushed me into evolving danny's personality until i was eventually brave enough to pick out a name for her and employ it. you can fit so much lore into this kid. danny thinks her uncles hung the fucking moon, tyler durden is her favorite person in the universe, even after he snapped at her in my most recent fic. danny definitely has more inclinations towards batshit insane behavior and she indulges them without really questioning them, so when she's with her uncles she doesn't feel ostracized for just being herself. she loves these men. and she's definitely got some gender things going on. if you see her emulating tyler's portrayals of masculinity, no you didn't (she'll get embarrassed).

and as an extra special bonus, tyler's people:

tyler's mom aka mable durden: listen i was really pondering my orb for this one and it just came to me like a fucking premonition. i disregard everything tyler says in the movie about "his" family, i think these are just projections of the narrator's relationships, so tyler is practically a blank slate. and the idea that tyler never knew his father at all, that he was abusive towards his mother so she left him before he was even born, that durden is his mother's maiden name?? oh that shit made me fucking bonkers. i didn't know how to handle it when the thought first occurred to me. tyler gets ALL his mannerisms from his mother, he siphoned like his whole personality off of her. she's The cigarette mom of all time. i think she could be very mean, but it's because she was over worked and poor and dead fucking tired all the time. she loved tyler a lot. she was the type who interpreted "physical affection with your kids" as "roughhousing" and this obviously influenced tyler in many many ways. she's the reason the way he shows love and affection is not through words but through actions and physical affection. she's also the reason he's addicted to nicotine. and i do believe she was a chronic complainer of her son being taller than her.

sam: ok i'll be totally completely honest i read "the parts of your hand grenade heart" by @grave-the-demon and i was BOMBARDED with the "tyler having a sister" spores. i added sam into my draft of "every man you've ever been" VERY late in the writing process. but i didn't want to just. steal the dynamic away from grace so i changed my answer a little bit so i wouldn't be accused of plagiarism. sam is like a sister to tyler. she's going to be his friend for his entire life, but he does not have such a connection to her that he can remain stationary for her. he'd only stay still in one spot for two people: his mother and the narrator. also, i need everyone to understand that sam is like. really hot. like she's so fucking strong and super fucking sexy in a Gay Woman type of way but the narrator has never been attracted to women a day in his life so he just doesn't perceive her as attractive so it never gets stated in the text. but please know this.

i'll be honest, i made the decision when writing "the idolatry of suburbia" to give the sister one boy and one girl because i didn't want the narrator to refer to anyone other than by their identifiers: my mom, my sister, my brother-in-law, my niece, my nephew. this continues in "every man you've ever been" whereas all the characters introduced in relation to tyler are given real names: mable durden, samantha hanes. and in "see me on the eight o'clock news" danny is only given a name when sam points out the presence of a relationship between her and tyler. sam mentions that danny seems more related to tyler than to the narrator, asks for her name, and it is immediately stated. prior, even in that fic, the narrator had only referred to her as "my niece" because i'm a creative writing student and i need to be playing 8D chess all the time.

anyway, that's my little spiel. thank you for coming to my ted talk.

[firelord-frowny]

yall these last several days have been THE! WORST!!!!

or idk, not the worst lmao i tend to try to save catastrophic language for actual catastrophes these days and since nobody is dead or maimed, i guess "really really sucked" is the better way to describe it.

but anyway. it really really sucked so bad that i dont even feel like properly ranting about it, so here's a bulleted list of the suckage. -Had (probably) the flu for like two weeks. Missed two weeks of volunteering and one week of work. -Felt better! Volunteered. Went to work. -Throat got sore in the middle of the night. like i literally FELT it get sore in real time. felt it swell. -Sore throat morphed to include an ear ache. -Also felt nauseous several times throughout the day. -went with my mom to go pick up groceries and also one single item to hopefully expedite my recovery (those lil emergen-c supplement drink packets) and somehow wound up getting yelled at about what an inconvenience it is to ~have~ to make a 20 minute round trip to pick up groceries that included something for me🙃 i literally would have just done an instacart order like i usually do but we already needed groceries and that is the only reason i put it in the grocery order so i guess that somehow means that its My Fault the household needed groceries and i guess a 20 minute trip is the worst fucking thing a person can be bothered to do on a sunday afternoon. i mean nevermind the asparagus and the yellow squash and the cornbread mix and the condensed milk and the walnuts and the clam strips and the bananas and the whole grain cereal and the canned vegetables and the frozen berries and all the other shit that aint have JACK to do with me, bc my vitamin c supplement made all of that moot and the sole reason for going to get groceries was because im a needy piece of shit whose better off idk dying of meningitis or soemthing, idfk.

-had a virtual ~urgent care~ visit. got prescribed antibiotics for what's probably a sinus infection gone nuclear. that was yesterday.

-today! throat still hurt like a bitch. couldn't really eat or drink much but I had an apple and some water before taking a dose of ibuprofen.

-went to work. started getting a migraine on the way. benadryl often takes the edge off of my migraines so my dad (who was giving me a ride to work) agreed to swing by a store and pick some up after dropping me off at work, and then swing back and bring me the meds.

-HOWEVER! you know what the first thing i did upon pulling into the parking lot at work was?

-puke. A LOT. big ol pile of puke in the parking lot. disgusting.

-called the front desk and let them know that i in fact made it to work but that i just vomited my guts out in the parking lot and should probably go home. they were like, "yikes, yeah, definitely go home, please feel better soon" and canceled all my students for the day. I'm Extra Upset by this bit because 2 of my students have missed a lot of lessons recently (one because they were on vacation, another because there were no lessons on 4th of july, another because a different student canceled, and one because i was sick) and i really really really want to keep as much consistency as possible both for the student's progression, and for increasing my chances that they'll keep me as a teacher. and i also had one new adult student that i saw for the first time last week and am super bummed that i already had to throw a wrench in his new experience learning an instrument.

anyway,

-throat was still hurting like a BITCH and i obviously needed to eat and drink especially since i THREW THE HELL UP EARLIER so i made another virtual urgent care appointment.

-got through the entire intake process as far as submitting all the forms. all that was left was for someone to call me and confirm all the info.

-i get the call! confirm the info! the lady says she'll send me a link to the visit as soon as we hang up.

-BUT THEN she asks me if i'd had a virtual visit the day before for the same reason, and i said yeah! and then she says! that i can't have a virtual visit because blah blah blah they cant do telehealth appointments for one patient for the same reason in less than 7 days! which like! ok i guess but PERHAPS THAT COULD HAVE BEEN POINTED OUT WHEN I SELECTED THE REASON IN THE INTAKE FORMS 15 MINUTES AGO???

-but whatever! okay fine! so i made an appointment for the in person clinic and was able to be seen relatively quickly.

-everybody was super nice (literally all of the medical people i've dealt with over the last two days have been super nice) and one of the desk ladies told me i have a "really sweet voice" and that made me Happyyyy and so i told her how happy it made me and that it meant an extra lot because i used to have a violin teacher who would tell me my voice was annoying and the lady was like "omg wtf" and i was like "i know right? i was like 13" and she's like "daaaaang wtf!' and im like RIGHT???

-even though i was able to be seen relatively quickly it still took kind of a long time for the nurse practitioner herself to get to me, but once she did, it was smooth sailing from there. covid, flu, and strep tests were negative. prescribed me prednisone for the sore throat. took my first dose in the clinic. picking up the rest of it from a pharmacy tomorrow.

-its now 3am as i type this and my throat is feeling significantly better. took my 3rd dose of antibiotics earlier tonight, along with some tylenol, since apparently ibuprofen can have some reactions with prednisone, and since my throat at that moment was still pretty sore. but i think by now i can finally EAT SOMETHING so thats what imma do, and then imma *samuel l jackson voice* Go The Fuck To Sleep.

[whoficky]

Getting There - Chapter 11

Sequel to After the Void. Definitely read that, before reading this.

Rating: T

Pairing: 10th Doctor X Rose Tyler

Work Summary: Rose wakes up in the TARDIS infirmary with no memory of how she got there. Her body is weak and her mind is a scrambled mess. She's so far from who she was and the life she used to live. The people she loves are helping her through a grueling recovery, but Rose fears she'll never get back what was lost. After running through the stars, how can she possibly cope with a life confined within the TARDIS walls? How can she deal with the daily reality of being completely dependent on others? And how long can she expect the Doctor to stay by her side now that she has so little to offer?

Chapter summary: Everyone enjoys a bit of ganging up on the Doctor. All in good fun.

Chapter 11

It was amazing having Jack back in her life.  The three of them spent the rest of the morning and a good part of the afternoon talking, and in so many ways it felt like old times.  That had to be a testament to their friendship what with all they’d each gone through since they’d last been together.  There were some tears and heartfelt apologies from her, of course,  but most of the time, it was just joking around and recounting past adventures.  Jack had decades and decades of naked stories stored up and he seemed determined to share every single one of them.  Rose laughed until her muscles ached, the good kind of ache for a change.  When she eventually got tired, the Doctor just reclined her chair and they went right on talking.  It was brilliant.

They probably would have continued on for more hours still, but they had to pick up Jackie and Pete in London and the Doctor preferred to leave time travel out of the navigation, just to be safe.  Over breakfast that morning, her mum had been relentless making sure the Doctor knew she’d inflict grievous bodily harm on him if he left them stranded.  Rose didn’t blame the Doctor for not wanting to risk being even a few minutes late. 

Still, she hated to say goodbye to Jack.  Today had felt like a wonderful break from the nightmare she’d woken up to after Canary Wharf.  The exhaustion and pain hadn’t truly gone away, but as she’d sat and talked and joked, it at least faded into the background.  It was nice to hear about what Jack had been up to too.  His life wasn’t without it’s trials, but immortality hadn’t devastated him, as she’d feared.  At least, if it had, he did a good job of hiding it.  For the most part, it was like no time had passed between them.  

“Come with us, Jack,” Rose begged as he and the Doctor got up and started tidying what remained of their TARDIS-provided lunch.

“Not this time, Rosie,” Jack said apologetically, “I have to finish up a case tonight.”

“Clothes optional?” she grinned up at him.

“If all goes well,” he winked back at her.

“Oh, come on,” the Doctor did a good job at sounding exasperated, but he had been laughing just as hard as she at Jack’s stories earlier. 

Jack stooped over to give her as good of a hug as he could manage with her still reclined, “I’ll see ya soon though.  You rest up for a few days in the vortex, I’ll let the Doc know when things calm down in the Hub so you can come for another visit.  Maybe we’ll even break you outta here at some point.”

“That sounds good,” she smiled.

“And I know meeting a bunch of new people probably isn’t something you’d be up for just yet, but I know Martha would love to stop in if we can snag her back from London for a day.”

“Martha?” Rose asked.

Jack looked at the Doctor with raised eyebrows.

“Right, Martha.  Yes.  Martha Jones.  Uh, traveled a bit with her while you were…away,” the Doctor tugged at his ear, “I don’t suppose I was very good company,” he mused,  “Still!  She helped out a lot when…when you first got back from the Void.  She’s a doctor.  Completely brilliant.”

“Oh,” Rose said, feeling a little sick.  She didn’t know why the idea of the Doctor traveling with someone else while she’d been in the Void had never occurred to her before.  She’d been gone for months and he really did need someone - a hand to hold.  Just…it gutted her that the hand had belonged to someone else.  And a doctor, too…  

When she felt the familiar stinging sensation behind her eyes, Rose took a breath and refused to give in to the emotions, fears, and insecurities this other woman brought up for her.  She didn’t want to end Jack’s visit that way.  

With as much cheer as she could muster, she smiled at Jack, “Yeah, I’d love to meet her sometime.”  Then Rose’s smile turned genuine when she thought of Sara Jane and how much fun they’d had roasting the doctor.  

“Monte bene!” the Doctor rocked on the balls of his feet.  Rose thought he looked relieved.    

“Bye then, Rosie,” Jack blew her a kiss, “Don’t let it be a few centuries before I see you again.”

“With him driving, who knows!” Rose giggled at the Doctor’s affronted look.  

“Need anything before me and my terrible driving go pick up Jackie and Pete?” the Doctor asked dryly.  

“No, ‘m good,” Rose said, “I’ll probably take a nap.”

“Alright then, be back soon.”  The Doctor checked to make sure none of the straps were chafing and leaned down to kiss her forehead.  It was all she could do not to laugh as Jack made outrageous lovey-dovey faces behind the Doctor’s back.  Rose could be sensitive when anyone else suggested her and the Doctor were anything other than platonic best mates, but Jack was just…Jack.  In his mind, everyone should be in a very non-platonic relationship with everyone else.  

“See you soon, Rosie,” Jack winked before exiting the library.

“Doctor,” she called as he was about to follow.

“Hmmm?” he said turning around.

“Thanks.”

He nodded and gave her a soft smile before following Jack into the corridor.  

****

Lucky for the Doctor, his piloting had been impeccable and they’d been exactly on time to pick up Jackie and Pete.  That’s why he was still alive and in one piece a couple hours later when they convened in the infirmary for tea. 

Rose was happy to see her mum and Pete looking so vibrant and alive after their outing.  They passed around the print of the ultrasound and gushed about the plans for the nursery now they they knew they were having a little boy.

A little brother.  It was still hard to wrap her head around it all.  Rose figured it wouldn’t seem real until she was holding the little guy.  Assuming she could hold him.  She’d have to start upping the weights of her arm exercises.   

“I was thinking,” her mum said, “we should do some kind of a theme.  That’s what Bev’s daughter did when Jeffrey was born.  Trains, I think…or was if frogs?  In any case, I was thinking trucks?  Or maybe planes?”

Rose wrinkled her nose.

“What?!” Jackie asked at her expression.

“Dunno, it’s just,”  Rose thought how to put it, “It’s very, ‘It’s a Boy!’ cliche, ya know.”

“Space!” the Doctor enthused, “Nebulas and stars and oh, there’s this brilliant galaxy a few thousand lightyears and a couple billion years in your future and it’s the most vibrant shade of purple when observed through the Haraloo asteroid field!  Well, only if you get it juuuuust right, which I have managed three times I’ll have you know - Wait why are you laughing?  What’s wrong with space?” He looked like a kicked puppy at having his contribution cut short.

But how could she be expected not to laugh.  It was the Doctor, gushing with her mum about nursery plans.  And of course it was space with him.

Before the Doctor could continue, her mum spoke up, “Absolutely not.  It’s going to be hard enough keeping that boy on Earth with the two of you flittin’ in ‘an out.  Don’t think I don’t know he’ll be begging to go along as soon as he can talk.  You’re not whisking off another one of my children, Doctor.”

Rose laughed harder when the Doctor sputtered, “I didn’t…I wouldn’t…Oi!  No children on the TARDIS!”

“What, not even for a visit,” her mum pouted.

“But you just said…” the Doctor started.

“Well I didn’t mean you need to banish him.  What if he wants to visit his sister?  What exactly am I supposed to do with a newborn when I visit my only daughter?  Leave him in the flat?  Have to get a sitter?  Oh no, the baby will be welcome on your ship, Doctor.  You’ll not discriminate.”

“But…but,” he sputtered, “It’s not discrimination, it’s dangerous!  Wires and - and tools and things!  Very dangerous things!  Not to mention, have you smelled a diaper?!  And the drool!  Drool in the TARDIS gears!”

The Doctor looked at Rose helplessly, but she just shrugged.  “Seems like you could make an exception.  I’m sure the Old Girl would do some baby-proofing.  Maybe we could have like a few safe rooms for ‘im.”

The Tardis sang an affirmative in her mind and the clarity of the connection shocked Rose for a moment.  Usually it took skin to coral contact for the ship to communicate so clearly.  She hoped the ship received the warmth she sent back.

The Doctor snorted, “She will not!”

“Will do,” Rose countered smiling up at the coral ceiling, “She’s happy to, in fact.”

The Doctor looked at her strangely, cocking his head to the side.

“Then it’s settled,” Jackie said and it seemed to interrupt whatever the Doctor had been pondering.

“It would make things easier,” Pete agreed.  “And it’s not like we’ll let him wander around without one of us.”

“You Tylers,” the Doctor huffed as he stood up and started to clear their plates, “No respect for rules.  None.”

Later, after Pete and her mum had gone to bed and Rose had been dozing herself, she woke up to find the Doctor staring at her from his usual seat with a very intense look on his face.  

“What?” She asked sleepily.

“Do you talk to the TARDIS?” He asked.  Something about his voice was funny, but Rose was too far into her regime of nighttime meds to play Time Lord decoder.  

“Of course,” Rose said, “Well, not really talk like I talk to you.  Like, feelings and stuff, yeah?  Or like…the general idea of things.”

When he just stared at her she demanded, “What?”

“That’s…not typical,” he finally said.  

Rose shrugged sleepily, “Wasn’t like that at first.  But over time, s’ just sort of happened.  Then after the Void it was harder at first, but not s’much anymore.  Is that bad?”

The Doctor shook himself, “Nah, no of course not.  Well, except when you gang up on me.”

“We’ll try not do to it again,” Rose yawned.

“Liar.”

“Yeah, probably.” She was was asleep almost as soon as the words left her mouth.  The TARDIS’s tinkling bright laughter colored her dreams.  

[rachaeljurassic]

Another one for the mfmm ask :) Your headcanon on when they actually fell in love with each other?

I don't have a full answer to this.

I'm rewatching and I don't think I'm up to that point yet with Phryne.

You see, I'm at the end of season 1, and I think that the fact that season 1 is about laying her ghosts to rest is important in that she cannot move forward until she has done that so she is still stuck in the same old routines that she has relied on to dull the pain. And yes, she loves him, but she's not IN love with him. She clearly cares deeply for him and, perhaps, the first signs of it are when she is willing to give up her life for Jack and Jane in 1x13, but it isn't just Jack and really she's seeing Jane as a stand in for Jayne so IMO it's more about her than him.

I think she falls in love with him in season 2, the season about Jack and him coming to terms with his past, whereas he falls in love with her in season 1, the one about her past. Is this significant, probably lol I will have to look out for the moment in season 2 and talk about it more then I guess :)

So, when did Jack fall in love with her?

I'm going to say definitely by 1x07 IMO or at least it is in 1x07 that he is hit by that fact like a brick to the face. I also think it's when Phryne realises he's in love with her.

So, I was thinking about what Jack says to Phryne. Quite early on (1x02) he tells her 'we weren't blessed'. The fact that he uses the past tense, and he's quite young, would probably lead Phryne to believe that he is either separated, divorced, or his wife is dead. He doesn't say 'we haven't been blessed' and unless his wife is a lot older it would seem she's out of the picture, so Phryne thinks that flirting is fair game.

And in 1x05 he starts displaying his trademark concern and then anger when Phryne stands in front of the gun. I feel like Jack knows what's happening, he's been in love before. It puts me in mind of PULP's  F.E.E.L.I.N.G.C.A.L.L.E.D.L.O.V.E because 'why me, why you, why here, why now?' 'I've got that taste in my mouth again'. And immediately after that he brings up his separation, but I don't think it's to encourage Phryne but to find out what she'll say. And she says precisely the right thing, that she understands that he is an honourable man who still considers himself married. And so in 1x06 he is free to play her game a little and quote Shakespeare in the knowledge that she won't take it too far and consider it an invitation. I don't think he is thinking that he could EVER have her, but at least he can indulge in flirtation ans see her over the occasional dead body, and he is going to have to do with that.

And then 1x07. The reason I think he realises for sure, 100%, is that he kisses her. And that is ALSO the moment that Phryne reaslies he's in love with her. Because it makes narrative sense. It's how Concetta realises Jack is love with somebody else so it makes sense that Phryne would know when she kisses him IMO. And the look on Jack's face afterwards is IMO both stunned adoration and the dawning realisation that this is A LOT more serious than he thought. And the look on Phryne's face is surprise and realisation, and perhaps a hint of the same feelings that she won't be acknowledging for a little while longer.

So, the EXACT moment, I'm not sure, but if I wanted to lay a bet I'd say it was the moment he kissed her, but that it had been a growing feeling even before then that he was conveniently ignoring.

And yes, things don't change markedly between them after that. Phyrne is in denial, Jack is claiming it's all part of the job, and they go back to their flirting. And, yes, it's soon, but I feel like Jack is somebody who doesn't just fall for anybody and when he does he falls hard and fast. So, yeah, I'm going with 1x07

And Phryne? Stay tuned ;)

(although I'm going out on a limb and saying it's 2x02, when she gives him that line about 'a heart as deep as the Pacific Ocean' because that is TOTALLY something normal you say to a freind ;D or at least she is WELL on the way :D)