#she’s 17 so she can handle it and be challenged a bit

[adonis-koo]

wicked • 17

↳ Summary: In a desperate hope to stop war from breaking you are a serviced to wed the most vile man alive, the one who has committed atrocities and war crimes beyond comprehension, he who is responsible for the fall of many nations, the wicked prince who’s heart is made of stone. You are to marry a man who challenges every belief and moral you stand for, all while being faced in a foreign land with nobody but yourself too trust…But are you both truly that different? Or is hate not too far from love?

↳ Pairing: Jungkook/reader

↳ Genre: arranged marriage AU, enemies to lovers, it’s kind of a period AU??? Historical but also technically not? prince!AU, eventual smut

Word Count: 8k

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Note: it’s actually difficult to believe it’s been eight months since I’ve updated, went through two jobs, a friend group and a boyfriend who gaslit the absolute fuck out of me and made me experience female hysteria 😍 I wrote this chapter the night he broke up with me so it just has that nice little extra touch of ✨ intensity ✨ enjoy lovies and I will be back hopefully sooner then last time with another update

It felt wrong, packing a small case of clothes while so many things at the castle had yet to play out, and Wheein’s life was hanging in the balance of it.

You had no intentions to trudge your way to the barracks but here you were; early morning where all of the guards were training and the person you were looking for was watching them, hands on his hips as he called out to one of them to tighten their guard.

You hadn’t planned on talking to him today, but leaving without so much as saying a word felt wrong, and perhaps after everything that had happened you were searching for sober reassurance.

“Jungkook.”

Everybody froze at the sound of your voice, you ignored all the eyes on you, after having lived in Penumbra for almost a year, you had somewhere along the way gotten used to all of the eyes that constantly followed you.

The guards exchanged awkward glances with one another, Jungkook looked surprised by your appearance, eyes glancing over you as if you were a hallucination, but after a moment it was evident you weren’t going to disappear upon blinking.

He glanced between you and the guards before he waved them off, “Keep going.”

You couldn’t stand the hopeful look in his eyes, almost a bit bashful as you walked in line with him further away from the barracks, “How can you expect me to leave the castle when Wheein is in a dungeon? And furthermore sending your aunt to try and reconcile with me?”

Jungkook frowned, “Well I doubted you wanted to see me after my drunk display- which truth be told I hardly remember anything I said, and It’s probably for the best that I don’t, Y/n…” He sighed as he stopped, “It was only a suggestion, it crossed my mind about the estate because truthfully I think you would like it there, and it would be safe,” His hands tenderly grabbed your shoulders as your lips curled in anger but you said nothing, “And I think it would be good for you to put all of this out of your head for a few days. I’ll continue to handle things here and if things change with Wheein trust that I’ll be able to take care of it.”

Your expression didn’t change as Jungkook frowned, “I would also like to remind you that she’s been one of my closest friends since I was a child. You’re not the only one who cares for her.”

You begrudgingly looked away from him but your expression softened, a stab of guilt surging through your stomach at the realization that he was very much right, “I know, I’m sorry I just-”

“Don’t be,” Jungkook replied, “You have a mean bite but I can appreciate your loyalty. I can’t undo the past but I want to make things right. I…” Jungkook paused, looking hesitant his eyes darting away from you and then back to you once more.

You offered no words forcing him to sigh, as if it was difficult for him to admit, “I want to be with you Y/n, not as two people amicable due to marriage or friends on uneasy terms…” He bit down on his cheek, unable to hold your steely gaze as his hand hesitantly reached out, tenderly stroking along your jawline, “I want more than that with you, I want all of the fire and all of the rage, I want the pain, the hardships. I want you, all of you, every flaw that makes you, you.”

You hadn’t even realized your eyes had blurred until his thumbs were tenderly pushing your tears away, “Is this a declaration?”

“It’s a promise.” Jungkook’s eyes held such a softness in them filled with something you still felt uncertain to assume, “You told me that you wanted to bear the deepest parts of yourself to me, all of your insecurities, the parts you don’t like about yourself, the parts you may even hate, so I am standing here to tell you to show me, show me all of it, and I will still take you as you are.”

He was saying many overwhelming words to you, but you knew he was dancing around the most important word, you could see it in his eyes, how it lingered on the tip of his tongue.

But something was stopping him from truly confessing it.

Perhaps even after all of these months, it was still too soon.

Evidently so given your circumstances.

“I don’t want you away from me,” Jungkook admitted, a frown slowly forming on his lips, “But if that’s what it takes, I would wait a lifetime if it meant your forgiveness, if it meant a second chance to be with you.”

“Is that why you’re willing to send me away?” You sniffled, “Otherwise you’ll continue to drink and wake me up in the middle of the night?”

“It wasn’t my finest moment,” Jungkook gave a weak smile, “But you can’t deny it got my point across didn’t it?”

Just his smile made something in you crumble, a vast desire to embrace him here and to forgive him, surely you could put this all behind you…?

But a bigger part of you didn’t want to rush this, you didn’t want to be complacent anymore, that was how you got into this situation, how you immediately jumped to Claudin’s offer rather than confide in the person you were married to.

It was such a raw feeling, you could feel it licking at your very soul, trying to tame your desire to throw all caution to the wind once more.

And for a brief moment you could feel Jungkook have the same reaction as you, as if it took every fiber in his being to not beg you to stay, you don’t know if you could stand your ground against him again if he came on as strong as he had last night.

“Just for a few days.” You whispered out as he frowned, giving you an understanding nod.

“You’ll love it there.” His hands finally let go of you, somewhat reluctantly.

And then it was silent for a long moment, tension still lingering in the air and both of you clearly hesitant.

“Then…I’ll see you in a few days.” You mumbled and Jungkook nodded once more. It felt like the ground was trying to engulf your feet as you turned around, feeling oddly empty at your goodbye, waiting for something that wouldn’t come.

What was it you had hoped for? A hug…?

Maybe a kiss…?

But then again, it felt as though you were no longer deserving of those things, Jungkook may have done things to hurt you but you had also done things to hurt him, how could you both love one another if you couldn’t trust one another first?

You wished Jungkook had reached out for you, to at least give you some form of affection before leaving, but he also knew this was true, and let you leave with no grief.

It left you feeling empty inside, but this was for the best.

You journeyed over horseback for the day, trying to leave your fretting heart behind as you nervously glanced back at the far away sight of the castle, what if something developed with Wheein?

You felt as though you were betraying her just by leaving, more than anything you were desperate to get her back, perhaps that was why Jungkook was sending you away, as if he sensed your desperation would only heighten the longer this went on.

Dare you say, he feared the worst might happen if you stayed.

Your grip tightened on your reigns, once more trying to put it out of your mind, taking a deep breath you took in the heady scent of the pine tree’s the surrounded you, the Estate was much closer to the mountains then you had anticipated, by midday you had journeyed far enough that snow had already reached the ground.

“Are you nervous?” Yoongi had slowed his horse down to ride next to you, his eyes however still scoured ahead for possible danger.

“What do you mean?” You frowned as you glanced at his back, hearing a branch snap as your eyes darted towards the left of him.

Your faithful companion Fenrir having accidentally broke the branch he had been carrying in his mouth the past hour he had grown fond of, a whine leaving him in disappointment as he picked up the bigger side.

“Journeying away from the castle during these trying times…” Yoongi glanced back at you, a frown of his own, “It can’t be easy leaving with everything that’s happened.”

You didn’t reply for a long moment, Yoongi slowed down to ride beside you as he curiously took in your expression.

It was silent for a long moment before you finally relented, “It is difficult, but…After a long night, I figured this was probably best. It seems like my involvement in things only tends to make them worse. And truthfully there's no telling what lengths I’d go to at this point to get Wheein back.”

“Oh?” Yoongi looked curiosity once more, “I didn’t realize you had such a taste for danger.”

His joke made a smile finally tug on your lips, “Neither did I before coming to Penumbra. It seems this kingdom has a way of bringing out the primitive nature in me. But then again, it seems people have always looked down on me when I think of it.”

“On you?” Yoongi scoffed in amusement, “Dryad Matron of Eunoia? It’s difficult to believe, you’re like a pillar of light to the commonwealth of Penumbra, it used to drive the Prince nuts during your engagement.”

“It did…?” You peered somewhat hesitantly at him.

This made Yoongi grin, “Oh yes, when news of your engagement first broke out it had the people ecstatic, it had him gagging every second he heard good things of you.”

“This is hardly making me feel better…” You winced, though a small part of you was amused to hear this, though you wish you could say the same.

It always seemed to you that people in Penumbra didn’t fully grasp just how much people feared them on the outside world, instead poking fun at the titles they had earned as if it was a little joke.

The whole two years of your engagement are two years you’d rather die then live through again, the anxiety that kept you up at night, the endless amounts of tears you cried, the emptiness it left inside you how no one even tried to comfort you.

Looking back you understood, nobody wanted to feed you lies to comfort you, but at the time, you didn’t understand, it felt cruel.

“Not everyone feels that way about me, evidently from what I saw in the Underside.” You replied, somewhat reminiscing on the horrendous memory of the mock version of you.

“You shouldn’t pay that any mind,” Yoongi scoffed, “The humor is juvenile there, everything it stands for is juvenile, even it’s name; the Underside was a joke, a mockery meant for every royal that has to say it’s name with seriousness, point being- they don’t respect anyone who won’t give them money.”

You only shook your head, “It’s not just that though, there has always been a small part of people and court alike who haven’t liked me, even long before I was engaged to Jungkook. I was known for having a temper,” It made you smile wryly, “-The Bitch of Eunoia, that’s what they ran around calling me behind my back. It was horrendous in Kimhae.”

“Was it now?” Yoongi looked amused by this, “That in some ways does, and doesn’t surprise me.”

“The court ladies in Eunoia often liked to call me that as well. But it was very pronounced by Kimhae court men. When I was younger, I used to wear traditional Eunoian attire when i’d visit. Apparently shoulders and knee’s used to drive them crazy. I had one of the aristocrats boldly ask me if I was an exotic woman of the night, willing to pay for me.”

Yoongi’s jaw had dropped making you laugh as he gestured you on, “What did you say?”

“Something along the lines of calling him a perverted old man whom ought to have his loins cut off for making such a comment to a women- let alone a Princess.” The memory made you smile as you shook your head, “The Bitch of Eunoia…why is it men are allowed to be angry Yoongi? Why is it women are shamed so?”

Yoongi let out a hum, “This is indeed a good question, but perhap it’s because they know a woman's scorn could even bring heaven out of the sky. I’m not all too surprised about Kimhae- but you said Eunoians called you this as well?”

Your smile became saddened, “By many court ladies yes,” You scratched your cheek in thought, “I was always lonely as a child…the war took a toll on me, I was temperamental and childish. But the court ladies as children, also liked to mock me and egg me on. As we grew older they grew closer and I still stayed a distance away. They’d find any reason to pick me apart or give me more work to do. They were practically leaping for joy when the news broke that I was engaged.”

“Why do you think that was though?” Yoongi asked, “That they didn’t like you?”

You shrugged, you had never really thought about it much, rather you preferred to keep the past where it was rather then dwell on it, “I suppose it had a lot to do with the fact that while we were all training to be healers I excelled more at it, it came naturally to me and they ended up putting me in the tents before the others. They all assumed it was from favoritism…Maybe it was,” You pondered on this briefly, “I just remember thinking it wasn’t fair.”

“Fair?”

You didn’t elaborate on the word for a long moment, feeling something akin to guilt bubble in your stomach.

You glanced off into the distance where the mountains towered high, it made you feel so tiny in comparison to its greatness, and briefly you felt awe.

You always admired nature, how vast it was compared to you and all your humanly troubles, you turned to it and it’s kin when you needed comfort and in these moments you could turn to it when you were also troubled with words.

It was difficult to adequately explain to people the rage you had felt since you were a child, anger had always been in your bones, from the moment you were born. Your mother used to tell you, that when she gave birth, you had come out of her womb with a roaring cry.

You craved to be vulnerable, to be soft and tender, to be all the things you were not, and you were many things, just not those.

Many people people heard you, they just never listened, didn’t understand.

“I had a lot of resentment as a child, to everything, the war, my parents, our country. I didn’t want to be a healer, I didn’t want to have to watch people in my care die, I didn’t want to attend the burnings or hear the whales of agony and pain, the cries of mourning, the people who blamed me for not being able to save their loved ones.”

You would be lying if you said you didn’t feel haunted by those memories, watching the lifeforce leave someone's body as you tried to stop the bleeding, the maimed limbs and mangled bodies that were beyond your skill or help.

“I didn’t want to be made to go past our lesson times to keep studying, or made to go back in to practice when all the other girls were allowed to play. Or put in a tent over night while they all slept. It wasn’t fair.”You mumbled, perhaps still a lingering tone of resentment.

The past was the past, it couldn’t be changed, you had come to terms with this, but if you stopped and really thought about it, old feelings old eventually begin to resurface, it was why you tried so desperately to just forget about it.

At one time you blamed Penumbra, you hated it’s people for what they did, what they caused.

But then you married Jungkook and you journeyed here yourself, and saw with your own eyes, that these people, were simply people, who were also victims of their own royalty.

You felt the soft grip of a hand on your shoulder, “I am sorry, for what it’s worth,” Yoongi held a face of sympathy, “We all felt the same, or…I suppose a mutual feeling on the opposite side of things. Children being forced to enlist into a war we didn’t want to wage with little choice…”

You gently grabbed his hand giving it a small squeeze, a weak smile on your face, “It wasn’t fair for any of us. We’re all a bi-product of our parents' sins. It’s up to us now to break that cycle.”

You had arrived to the estate by nightfall and it was shrouded in tall pine and fir trees, the aroma had you closing your eyes for a moment to savor it, just as Jungkook said, it truly was beautiful.

Snow covered the ground in a few inches, and a chill was left in your bones, but you settled in rather nicely, Yoongi had managed to get a fire going rather quickly and it was quiet in the solitude of the estate.

For once, it was nice to be able to breathe without being watched.

The first two days had went by surprisingly quick, but you had found a natural rhythm in nature, you went on long peaceful walks, kept yourself wrapped in a blanket while sitting on the terrace taking in the crisp cool air.

You had even spent the evening watching the snowfall outside, enchanted at how it came in big fluttering puffy balls, you had heard of snow before, but you had never actually seen it fall from the sky, like a thousand little gifts from the heavens.

It was dull and gray out today, the same as it had been for the last week now, at the estate was unsurprisingly no different.

Today however you had Yoongi set up some haybales in the pit area where guards would typically be trained, it was run down now, old boxes used as storage had been broken down and were hazardously strewn everywhere, long nine inch rusty nails sticking out of wooden pieces at razor sharp jagged angles.

But with Yoongi’s help you both had piled it up safely away and got a decent bit of space ready for training.

“Too stiff-”

“Ah!”

It was a second too late, you had already released the string, sending the arrow flying, it had veered off target as the string slapped your forearm with a sharp snap causing you to drop it.

Fenrir suddenly popped up from the ground where he had been laid out the last half hour, head cocked in concern at the noise that escaped you.

“How many times do I have to tell you,” Yoongi groaned, “You can’t hold it with a stiff arm! Look at this!” He got up from his spot as he held up your arm by the wrist, “It looks like somebody gave you a lashing! Jungkook will have my head if it isn’t heal by tomorrow.”

Your lips twisted into a sulky pout, “I am trying!”

“Not hard enough that’s the fifth time within the hour,” Yoongi whistled out as he let you go, Fenrir walking up to you as he sniffed your hand, giving it a lick before nudging it.

You rubbed your forearm, that was undeniably sore and throbbing with pain before placing your hand on Fenrir’s head to give it a nice long rub.

He had grown remarkably big in the last month, almost as big as you now, just a five or six inches shorter, it made you give a sad frown, at how big he was and soon he’d become a monstrous size…

You’d simply have to build a bigger stable you supposed.

“Aim comes naturally but holding a weapon does not,” You sighed as you placed both your hands on Fenrir’s head, now giving him generous rubs and pats that had him giving a toothy puppy grin that made you smile, “I’ve practiced here and there with a bow but with everything going on, I just haven’t made it a priority.”

Yoongi sighed, “Natural ability will only get you so far, discipline if a far greater advantage Princess, thankfully we can start working on this daily, I think it’d be good for you to have a hobby.”

“I have hobbies.” You frowned as crossed your arms.

“Such as…?” Yoongi gestured.

“Well…” You could think of several as a matter of fact, but you had given them all up once you had moved to Penumbra, the thought made you frown in realization, you had been so caught up in all the highs and lows of your new life that it was true.

You had hobbies, you just never participated in any of them.

“I suppose it would do me some good to work on it,” You sighed as you relented, “I still feel a tad guilty though, shouldn’t I be honing my skill in swordsmanship? Jungkook once told me that it’s expected the Crowned Prince and Princess are supposed to be the best at it.”

“Well…” Yoongi stretched the word, “This is true but, I don’t think somebody is going to fault you for not being the best at it. I’d like to think it’s an expectation from those born in Penumbra, not those who marry in. Not only this but if you are inclined to another form of weaponry, then it’s as simple as that.

“As long as you have some form of sword training then it’ll do,” Yoongi shrugged, “What matters is personal protection, some training is better then none, but having a form of training you’re good at is even better.”

“You Penumbrian’s certainly like taking precautions.” You sighed wistfully as you picked up your bow once more.

“The more the better,” Yoongi said, “Guards are great, but what happens when you’re caught without any? Learning to defend yourself is vital.”

You glanced down at your bow, “I understand but…”

“But?” Yoongi asked.

“Well, I suppose a part of me just feels odd,” You replied, “I grew up being taught to save lives, not take them,” You rubbed your neck in uncertainty, “When I took the Dryad’s oath, it was a promise to myself and my ancestors that I would abstain from our carnal nature. That I would never take a life nor would I consume its flesh. Animal or human. Even though the chances of me having to defend myself in such a way are so low, it’s odd to train for it, after taking that oath and living by it my whole life.”

Yoongi let out a small smile, “Then don’t view it as such.”

“What do you mean?” You tilted your head.

“Sword play is considered an art form in Penumbra, you can view a bow in the same light. It’s quite a beautiful thing really, it’s not just aiming and shooting, it’s how you hold it, the type of arrow you use, the weight of your feet. A lot goes into it.”

You thought on this for a while before nodding, “I suppose you are right.”

“Min Yoongi! I’m looking for a Min Yoongi?”

A voice called out that had you both glancing around the courtyard before seeing the courier at the gates glancing around before meeting his gaze.

“Yes?” Yoongi called out, walking up to meet him.

“I have a letter for you sire! It was urgent from the court” The courier dug through his bag before handing it to him, giving a short bow to you and then departing.

You glanced at it anxiously as you exchanged a look with Yoongi, was this about Wheein?

Yoongi opened the letter, reading it before he sighed,

“What, what is it?” You asked, anxiety in your voice.

“It’s not about Wheein,” You let out a breath in relief as Yoongi continued, “But it is a request for help.”

“What do you mean?” You asked.

Yoongi sighed, “There’s a watchtower just east of here, about an hour away give or take on horseback, apparently they’ve been dealing with a gang of bandits up there. Supposedly they’re going to siege the tower.”

“They can do that?” You asked in surprise.

Yoongi shrugged, “I suppose so, I don’t know what they think I can do about it.”

“Well you said you were an assassin before you became a knight? So surely that counts for something.” You said, setting down your bow on a lonely bale of hay.

Yoongi sighed as he folded the letter back up, “Even so, I won’t just leave you here by yourself.”

You frowned, “It’s only us here, and it’s secluded so I won’t be in any real danger, and you said it was only an hour away. I doubt you’d take long in taking them down.”

“Are you just trying to get rid of me?” Yoongi asked in mild amusement.

“I would never!” You said, “But I’d hate to see something unfortunate happen that could be prevented, you’re far closer then someone is to the castle. It would make the most sense for you to go.”

Yoongi sighed, “Even if I’m over cautious, it doesn’t sit right leaving you here all by yourself.”

“I wouldn’t be alone!” You replied, grinning as you gave Fenrir a solid pat, “Fenrir will defend me! Jungkook and I have been working on commands. Sit!”

Fenrir immediately complied.

“Very fierce.” Yoongi said dryly.

You held up a finger, grabbing a piece of wooden box that was free of any nails off the ground, “Fenrir,” He perked up at his name, “Attack!” You threw it causing his gaze to follow it with a loud snarling howl, his jaws crunching the board in half immediately grabbing the smaller end.

Running back to you before dropping down on his front paws, tail wagging as he tried to get you to chase him.

Yoongi looked a bit more startled at the thick board of wood that had been crushed as he nodded, “Okay, a little more fierce than before…” Yoongi thought about it for a long moment, “I suppose if I left now I would make it back by supper….Are you sure you’re okay with this?”

You gave him a small smile, “It’s only a few hours, I think I’ll be able to manage.”

Yoongi still seemed hesitant but he nodded, “I’ll go gather a few things then and be off. The sooner I leave the sooner I’ll be back.”

“It’s one night,” You smiled, “And then we’ll be back at the castle tomorrow.”

You had waved Yoongi off before you continued on with your day.

Spending another few hours training with your bow you had eventually given up once the string of your bow hit a particularly sensitive spot on your forearm.

The rest of your day had been spent taking walks along the trail’s with Fenrir before eventually settling inside, roaming the halls and exploring empty rooms.

And eventually the afternoon came.

But slowly the sun began to set and a vague feeling of dread followed along with it.

Yoongi…would’ve been back by now, right?

Or perhaps it took him longer to clear out the bandits.

You nodded at this as you stayed curled up in your large chair, Fenrir curled up beneath your feet as he let out a sigh, as if sensing your discomfort and unsatisfied with it.

Continuing to read, time went on and soon the sun had set.

You had managed to get a fire going on your own and had lit the candles in the hall, making the estate feel less consuming then it had before but it didn’t quell your anxiousness as the hour went on later.

Yoongi would certainly be back by now…

You were certain you’d manage the commute back to the castle if you had too but…You wouldn’t feel right just leaving without him, but you also had no way of sending a message to the castle for help without going back yourself.

You felt at a loss for what to do, as you roamed the main hall, pausing at the sound of the gate opening. Opening the doorway you hurried out to the courtyard.

“Yoongi, I’ve been waiting all day, you worried me sick!” You stopped short at the sight ahead of you.

“Not who you were expecting?”

Di Jin’s smug smile was the last thing you saw before the sudden blow to your head caused your vision to go dark.

“You look lost.” Jimin commented as he plopped in a seat right next to his dearest friend, both sat out for breakfast on the terrace.

“Was it a good idea sending her to the Estate?” Jungkook stared down in hard contemplation, his food untouched, “If something happens I won’t be able too…!”

He inhaled sharply as he forced himself to lean back in his chair, but despite the motion his body refused to relax.

You had left two days ago and he felt a void ever since.

Jungkook didn’t realize how much your presence had filled every inch of the castle until you had left, and now, he felt utterly useless, it was one thing for you to be mad at him, it was another for you to be gone.

Jimin looked amused but felt bad for him nonetheless, “Nothing is going to happen to her, the estate is nice and tucked away, the entire court has forgotten about it anyways, it hasn’t been used in years. You did a good thing.”

“Did I?” Jungkook finally slumped.

He had been constantly replaying his last memory of you, the conversation you both had before you left, the memory of you looking up at him for a long moment as if silently yearning for some form of affection.

It left Jungkook’s hands twitching and an unfamiliar ache in his chest, he couldn’t even describe how it felt. And he was honest when he spoke with you the night before, true he didn’t remember much, but what he did remember was straight from his heart, he thought he knew many things.

But after meeting you he found out quickly that he knew nothing at all.

Tomorrow, surely you’d be back tomorrow. You hadn’t given him an exact timeframe, but surely when you said a few days, you had meant no more then three?

“What if I-”

“No.” Jimin cut him off, “The whole point of her going was to get out of the castle and by default away from you. Not only that but what if something happened to Wheein while you were gone?”

Jungkook sunk back in his chair, that was right…He had promised you he would take care of anything that might possibly happen.

He wouldn’t let you down.

“Have you found any evidence yet?” Jungkook lowered his voice, his gaze lingering on the far side of the table where Claudin had been dining with a group of court ladies.

Jimin frowned, “Yes but the problem is getting it open,” He huffed, “I was able to slip into his room last night, it was empty but he has a lock box beneath a hollowed broken floorboard piece, seems he was in a hurry when he left, otherwise it wouldn’t have been left afar.

“Regardless I haven’t been able to crack the lock. Whatever is in there, it has a master’s lock on it. I’ll need at least another dozen picks before I even come close to cracking it.”

Jungkook sighed as he shook his head in disdain, “Of course when we need Yoongi he’s gone.”

Their elder would be able to open it within the hour if he was here.

Jimin frowned as well, “I’ll try again this afternoon.”

Jungkook’s eyes narrowed, “That’s early for you.”

“We’re running out of time Jungkook,” Jimin sighed, sinking back into his chair as well, eyeing Claudin with a certain wryness, “I keep hearing stirrings from the guards about how they’ve narrowed their search, but they’re hellbent on saying it was Wheein.”

“Sire,”

They both paused at the sight of Taehyun, a frown on his face as he glanced between them both, an anxious look as he bowed slightly, “It’s the council…they’ve summoned you. It doesn’t sound good, you should come as well Jimin.”

Jungkook glanced at his friend but said nothing as he stood up, not liking this one bit.

The walk to the throne room was swift and Jungkook wasted no time in arriving, the other council members had just arrived as well.

Clearly he wasn’t the only one uncertain of what was going on, other members had started hushing whispers to one another, all glancing in Jungkook’s direction occasionally as he leaned against the wall, arms crossed as he glanced at the empty throne the seats on its left occupied by his aunt and uncle whispering to one another.

They both glanced at him once before quickly looking away.

The tension felt suffocating and the longer it lasted the more anxious Jungkook felt, seconds turned into minutes and the whispers began to get louder.

And all within a moment, the doors open and a sweepingly silence took over the room save for the sound of boots against the ground. Dae Seong walked with confience in every step before standing before everyone on the throne.

“It is with confidence I have come to announce something of the utmost importance,” His voice boomed, “The attempted assassination on our Crowned Princess, was indeed committed by her maid Jung Wheein, we have reason enough to believe it was her as all the evidence points as such. Her form of punishment will be burning at the stake, tonight at the height of the moon. I ask you all join me on this divine distribution of punishment,”

Groaning softly your vision was blurry at first, and the first person to appear in your vision was not who you expected.

“Not so quick witted now are you Eunoian Bitch,” Seohyun sneered, her smirking figure beneath you as your vision of her doubled.

Your mind was confused as you only remembered Di Jin being here, your eyes closed briefly only for a sharp pain to spread through your side that you recognized as being kicked in the side by her.

Groaning your eyes opened and her eyes beaded, sneering at you as another voice spoke, “Come along now Seohyun, why don’t you go see if that insufferable knight has managed to come back yet, I will finish our business here.”

She eyed you warily but said no more as she left and soon Di Jin stood in front of you, “You have truly been a pain in my ass since I was enlisted to kill you, I only hope you realize that.”

There was no remorse in his eyes as he pulled the wickedly curved knife from it’s sheath and a sadistic smile curled on his face, “Don’t worry Princess, i’ll make sure you have a slow miserable death.”

Despite your sluggish movements, adrenaline had shot in your veins as you realized you were about to die, you had too much to live for still. You needed to see what would come of Eunoia, you needed to make sure Wheein was okay, that you would keep your promise to Jungkook.

You couldn’t die, and you would fight if it meant living to see it.

Your mind was slowly coming out of it’s haze as Di Jin stepped closer to you, realizing you were in the courtyard near the hay bales, the pile you had cleaned early next to you, your arm reached over to grab one of the planks, three long rusted nails sticking out of it.

You swung it with as much force as you could towards his legs, it made contact, the nail piercing his skin with a wet noise as he cried out in pain, falling back on the ground as he growled out. “You dumb bitch, a pain until the end!”

You attempted to crawl away, heart pounding in your ears as you scurried but he was still too mobile, yanking the plank out of his leg with a growl of pain as he managed to get on top of you, you caught his wrists as he attempted to plunge the knife in your throat, “I’ll enjoy watching the life leave your eyes. I’ll be sure to bring your head back for your little husband to see one last time.”

Your strength was already failing as you winced out, the knife slowly coming closer to your skin as you whimpered out as it pierced the first layer of your flesh.

It was an indescrible pain that had you yelping in pain,

“I’ll make these last few moments the most excruciating and perhaps if you beg me enough, I might just end your pathetic little life girl,” Di Jin grinned leaning in closer, “Maybe if you beg me more i’ll give you a little more than just a long death.”

He pushed the knife a little deeper as blood spilled from your skin making you cry out, his body weighing heavier on yours and his lips suddenly pressing to your ear, “Something tells me you’d prefer that over this.”

Something about his lips pressing against your skin lit something primal inside of you, every sense heightened inside you as your lips parted taking a wide bite into his neck, you could taste it first, the metallic flavor of blood running across your tongue and dripping down your throat and then his skin was next, uncomfortably soft and tender and next was the cartilage, it was rubbery and had hard bits in it, next was the sensation of something warm and wet against your face.

Di Jin could no longer properly speak, his grip suddenly loosened on the knife as you yanked the large chunk of flesh straight from his neck, grabbing the knife as you yanked it away shoving him down as you managed to get on top of him.

The chunk missing from his neck was ghastly, blood pooling on the ground, oozing everywhere and squirting from various places and he was gagging loudly, choking on his own blood.

Anger trembled in your body, it wasn’t enough, even with chunks of flesh missing and blood covering your face, skin hanging and cartilage visible it still wasn’t enough, before you could even think you plunged the knife into his neck, eyes blurring as you watched him gurgle, choking on his own blood as the life left his eyes.

Your hands were shaking as you waited for him to jump back to life to kill you, and then you slowly realized your vision was blurred from tears, your heart pounding as you took a shaky breath yanking the knife out of his neck before you let out blood curdling scream slamming it back in his neck again.

Jungkook’s betrayal.

Wheein being taken.

Exiled from your own kingdom.

Being forced to wed.

Made into a healer as a child.

Bone.

Blood.

Ash.

The mourning bells rang in your head and you could vividly taste the metallic on your tongue stronger than ever as the taste of raw flesh lingered in your throat.

Blood splattered upward as you stabbed the spot over again, all of the rage searing in your veins as Di Jin’s form became disfigured, his neck nearly separating his head from his body as you shoved the knife in deeper.

Hearing the wet gurgling noise as you heaved a breath, staring at his cold dead eyes staring back at you, the next scream was not your own, but it came closer within seconds before the door to the estate opened.

Seohyun was heavily bleeding from her left thigh, sporting a large bite as a loud snarl came from inside the door, shakily you stood up, “Fenrir, wait.”

The large wolf paused, and that's when you noticed the large gash on his leg, causing him to limp, rage quelled in your veins again as you limped over, Seohyun looked pale a ghost at the sight of you.

From the moment this woman met you, she had given you nothing but grief, attempted to humiliate you, belittle you, try to win a lost battle, attempt to kill you, and now she had hurt your precious companion.

Even with a mangled body behind you, it still wasn’t enough.

Tripping over her own two feet she fell down as you walked over, “We can talk about this Y/n!” Her eyes were as big as saucers, “Please! I’ll leave Penumbra and- and never come back.”

You felt nothing for her as you stood above her, watching pathetic tears drip down her face for a long moment, finally you knelt down, “If Penumbra has taught me anything Seohyun, It’s that some people do not deserve my forgiveness, nor my kindness.”

Her lips parted rapidly, her throat scratchy, and for the first time, you saw genuine fear in her eyes, “B-but you’re a Eunoian,”

Her words were pointed, bargaining, pleading even- if you listened close enough, “Eunoian’s don’t kill.”

Your lips slowly lifted into a joyless smile as you let out an uneasy laugh, “Well,” Your smile dropped, your hands were still shaky, unbridled rage still taunt in your veins.

The primal urge of need to prove her wrong, prove all of them wrong, that you would never again be looked down upon as weak or underestimated.

Your hand grabbed her neck, causing her to let out a choked sob as you squeezed it tight enough to choke her airway, yanking her nearly nose to nose with you.

“We’re not in Eunoia, are we?” Your nails dug into her neck, not stopping until you felt the blood from her skin oozing, you shoved her back before you stood up, ignoring her blubbering, tears trickling down her face as you walked away, “Fenrir.”

“Please!”

He let out a growl, “Attack.”

Her cries of agony were left of deaf ears as you walked back over to the corpse of Di Jin grabbing the knife from his neck and yanking it out before taking the sheath that went with it, adjusting it on your waist.

Collapsing on the ground away from him you noticed your hands for the first time, shaking, trembling as your vision blurred once more, scarred and covered in blood, just what had you done?

Fenrir’s mouth was covered in blood, but the whine didn’t escape your ears as he tenderly tried to sit down in front of you.

“I’m sorry.” You ushered, grief strong in your voice though uncertain of who it was for, yourself, your country, your companion, you reached out for him, gently rubbing your hand down his neck, “But we have a long journey ahead of us Fenrir.”

The bells were ringing and a somber air had taken over, Jungkook had nearly lost his entire wits, his father had banished him from the room, not wanting to hear another word from him about this.

Being told he was too sentimental fell on deaf ears, he didn’t care, it was his friend, it was injustice, it was corrupt. He hated it, he hated that despite being the crowned prince, his son, his father simply didn’t care.

All Jungkook could do was wait for Jimin to unlock this damn box. But it felt as though it was too late, he was banned from so much as leaving his room, guards at his door there to keep him boxed in but this wouldn’t stop him.

pulling the cloak over his head, he opened the window, the bricks were jagged and uneven enough that he could easily climb down, he did it often when he was younger, much to the blindness of his father.

Scaling the wall, Jungkook got down, feet planted firmly on the ground as he kept the hood over his head tight as he made his way to the courtyard. A crowd had gathered, all wanting to witness the supposed assassin.

Nobody paid mind to him with his identity concealed, it would be soon now. If he couldn’t get evidence to get Wheein out, then Jungkook would take matters into his own hand. He didn’t want to have Wheein leave Penumbra, but if this is what it took to keep her safe until her innocence was proven, this is what he would do.

He owed so much of his existence to her, he couldn’t let this happen.

He wasn’t going to let this happen.

The bells stopped as Dae Seong stood up from his throne on the wooden stage they had set up, “We have all gathered here to see the execution of the assassin who tried to kill our crowned princess! Her very own handmaid, this is the killer, our own flesh and blood, and the punishment for a traitorous woman is fitting, burning of the steak!”

Wheein was brought out, her hands tied behind her back, her eyes had dark circles and she was crying as she shook her head, “Please! I would never do that to Penumbra! To Y/n! Please you have to believe me!”

But her cries were in vein as the crowd boo’d her, all shouting vile words her way as they dragged her down to the large wooden steak pyre that had been set up.

Jungkook shifted in his spot as he watched them begin to tie her up.

“Are there any last words you would like to impart to us traitor?” Dae Seong looked at her with pure disgust.

Wheein’s lips quivered as she parted them.

A loud bloodcurdling scream interrupted her before she could speak, the crowd tensed and everyone seemed alert, Jungkook was towards the front, having intended on getting her off there the right moment, but he quickly turned around to see people quickly departing and creating a path.

And the next thing he saw was hardly comprehensible.

You, covered in blood, your face was a horrific sight with it’s dried crimson color covering your mouth all the way down your neck, but what was even more horrifying was what was next to you, Fenrir limping beside you, a corpse held in his mouth.

Women screamed and men gasped in horror as they all moved.

The looks on the royals faces were indescribable, Dae Seong most of all, “What is the meaning of this?”

You stopped in front of the throne, Fenrir as if knowing this was the destination, dropped the body from his jaws, it smacked the ground with a wet echo, the head finally detaching from the body as it rolled towards Dae Seong.

You don’t think you had ever seen an expression quite like what Dae Seong had, and you were sure this would be the only time.

It was silent for a long moment before you finally spoke, your throat raw and scratchy, “That’s your assassin, he tried to kill me again just hours ago.”

Dae Seong’s look of shock slowly twisted into one of rage, “Where is your proof of this!” He stood up from his throne towering over you with a growl, “What does a girl like you have meddling in business you don’t understand and taking the lives of those who were helping!”

“Am I standing in front of you not proof enough?” You snarled back, “From the moment I have come to this kingdom I have been nothing but disrespected, disregarded, used, and seen as nothing more than a tool to further someone’s agenda. And i’m sick of it.”

“Even when it comes to my own life, you stand in front of me questioning it!”

“Why I ought too!-”

“I have it!” A voice cried out, Jimin was running from the side entrance of the courtyard, a notebook in his hand as he panted, his eyes widening when they set on you, ‘Y/n!? Are you okay? I have it, I have proof that Di Jin was the assassin! Here, your majesty.”

Dae Seong snatched it with a certain level of venom as he looked through the book, but slowly as his eyes read through, an unreadable look took over his face.

Exhaustion began to take over, your body beginning to sway.

Dae Seong closed the book with a sense of finality, “Very well,” He aid with gritted teeth, anger still simmering in his eyes, “Perhaps, you do have the grit to survive here princess.”

You didn’t hear his words though, your gaze had went down to the body of Di Jin, and swaying backwards you collapsed into an abyss of darkness, nothing more then multiple people calling your name.

[commanderhorncleaver]

Serving up a 3 with a side of 9 and 17 for Gaius with both Rytlock and Efram 👀

oho you started strong lmao putting it under a readmore cause it's a lot!

Gailock!

3. In what ways are they good or bad for one another?

Starting with what's bad: I think they exacerbate one another's worst problems; Gaius makes Rytlock more insecure, and then more fractious. Rytlock's obstinance then makes Gaius more reclusive and reluctant to communicate (which he's already not exactly great at) and he turns to others and focuses his attention--read, obnoxious old-man tendencies--onto them to make himself feel productive.

As for the good: Rytlock gets Gaius out of his shell, makes him do things, be a bit more spur of the moment. They have fun getting into shenanigans together--the charr tutorial, Barradin's Vault, was specifically Rytlock asking Gaius out on a date. Gaius meanwhile pushes Rytlock to face things and ask questions and focus on improving. It requires a lot of introspection, but he does admire that about Gaius, and after a while, he works to emulate that (IBS in Gaius-canon).

9. How do they feel about each other's exes and people who flirt with them? Is jealousy an issue in general?

Gaius is generally indifferent towards the idea of Rytlock's promiscuity, but he doesn't handle it as well when faced with it. He didn't need excuses to dislike Logan, but a more culpable example is Crecia; while Gaius is admittedly being swamped with things during the Rally, he's distinctly uncomfortable with Crecia, and a particular part of it is because they're actually rather similar, especially in their driven attitudes. However, he sees how she treats him, and worries a lot about how he treated Rytlock.

Rytlock meanwhile, I imagine is more open to Gaius's promiscuity; though he can be territorial, he's very capable of acknowledging their legion separation and how Gaius has an active warband he's with, and so on. In practice, he tends to weaponize the fact that he knows Gaius isn't having a lot of sex outside of Oberon, and taunt Gaius with his own promiscuity in order to spur him into action. This has led to several hookups when they were "taking a break"; technically they never talked about the breaks to begin with, but it just led to more arguments.

17. Is there a secret that they don't dare tell the other? Why? Will they ever say it?

Surprisingly, and this goes for both parties, I don't think so. Gaius's struggle with communicating is more an issue of his alexithymia making him struggle to recognize his emotions--he doesn't realize there are things he needs to communicate because he views things in a very methodical lens. Rytlock, on the same issue, simply just has other things to do, and doesn't really even realize they're in a situationship, so. There's no room for love there; they've got shit to do.

Efrus!

3. In what ways are they good or bad for one another?

I highlighted Gaius's issues with experiencing his emotions in the Rytlock section: the thing is, his return to the Legions for the Rally is his point where he's identified this, and is working on improving his habits of compartmentalizing things he doesn't realize he's feeling. During the Rally, and later after his success at the Rally, Gaius is basically assigned to interface with Flame, because Smodur's testing his loyalties (and also it's funny. your shitty dad is here? go make nice with him) and he and Efram basically hit it off well from the get go, whenever Gaius isn't getting dragged away by something else. The other challenge Efram presents is that he himself is open about his interests, and it forces Gaius to be aware of his own, and try to match that openness. It's growth for him because he's constantly trying to pay attention to how he feels, and then communicate that.

Gaius is good for Efram cause he keeps him pregnant.

9. How do they feel about each other's exes and people who flirt with them? Is jealousy an issue in general?

As we don't know much about Efram's past relationships (though Prisca existing as a younger cub tells us he's at least relatively active sexually/romantically) I can only assume Gaius is at least surface-level as indifferent as he is with Rytlock. He's not an exceptionally jealous individual, and because they're talking, it's easier for them to establish expectations for a long-distance relationship. So Gaius is cool. Don't flirt with Efram in front of him, though.

Efram meanwhile is someone I imagine probably finds Gaius's situationships and lack of awareness quite funny. He probably teases Gaius about the crowds of charr (and other races!) he leaves in his wake, which Gaius assures him is not the case. Where Rytlock is concerned, I don't think he's super bothered by him.

17. Is there a secret that they don't dare tell the other? Why? Will they ever say it?

There's nothing that I can imagine! I'm tired, so I'm not going to offer conjecture with this one, but ostensibly, with how much more open Gaius is by this point, especially just with trying to be open, I can't think of any secrets he'd keep.

[whisperingspinesliterary]

Hello, everyone! Welcome to the library.

As far as wrap-ups go - I'm a little late. And as far as intro posts go, well - I'm not quite sure this is the best way to start. But here we are. You may call me Whisper; I'm 28, a life-long reader, self-taught writer, an avid gamer, and a movie enthusiast. I've been in a years-long reading slump, and finally managed to crawl my way out of it in early 2024. Trust me when I say, my love of reading is something I never want to forget about myself again. So here I am!

I had a blog years ago, but I couldn't even tell you what I used to write about. I decided, in order to keep in my rediscovered booksphere, why not start a blog to log my adventures in reading and maybe even talk about my own books that I'm crafting and movies that I love? A catch all place for story lovers. I'm also starting a YouTube channel, which you can watch HERE. It has some new videos, as well as some old writing videos from last year when I originally started posting on it.

I'm so excited to be diving into this endeavor!

As a whole, 2024 was a hell of a ride. Both in life and in books. I spent most of 2024 unemployed, which hasn't happened since I was a teenager. (I still am unemployed; it is a rough market out there...) But I also found some new favorites and read books that I will gladly never touch again. I started tracking my progress on StoryGraph (you can follow HERE). It's an app and website that was created and is owned by a black woman. I find it much more intuitive and user friendly than GoodReads. It also gives more in-depth breakdowns of your reads up to the current! Honestly, I can hardly navigate the GoodReads app.

Last year, I tracked 12 novels, 29 manga, 1 audiobook, 2 novellas, roughly 17 short stories, and only DNF'd 2 books. Pretty solid for just rewetting my feet. My goals this year are to read 25 novels (about 2 a month), 3 complete manga series, and double the amount of short stories I read. I think they're pretty reasonable goals, and I'm looking forward to challenging myself!

I have a bad habit of judging books based off their covers. My very first read of last year caught my attention because of its stunning cover. It was the whole reason I bought it. A Botanist's Guide to Parties and Poison is a detective novel set in 1920s London. It follows 23-year-old Saffron Everleigh as she struggles with being a woman botanist working at University College London in a time when women in the sciences weren't respected. She finds herself wrapped up in a mystery when a department head's wife is poisoned at a party she's attending, and the professor she works under is the main suspect.

A Botanist's Guide to Parties and Poisons is Kate Khavari's debut mystery novel. Honestly, you can tell a bit in the writing, and especially in the way that Saffron handles certain aspects of her mystery. But overall, I really enjoyed the book. I found Saffron delightful to follow and her seedling romance with Alexander Ashton to be adorable. I liked it so much that I bought and read the subsequent sequels - A Botanist's Guide to Flowers and Fatality and A Botanist's Guide to Society and Secrets. I'm looking forward to A Botanist's Guide to Rituals and Revenge, which is releasing later this year.

I'm a huge fan of Carolyn Keene’s Nancy Drew, Agatha Christie’s Poirot, and Franklin W. Dixon’s Hardy Boys. So these books absolutely tickled my fancy. Each mystery gets more intriguing, and the world around Saffron keeps growing and getting richer. My only issue is that in Flowers and Fatality and Society and Secrets Saffron just seems to get angry for no reason. Everything irritates her, and her character is slightly changed from her original personality in Parties and Poisons. As a whole, I give the series a 3/5 and definitely would recommend giving it a read!

I followed Up A Botanist's Guide with a complete genre leap. I dove head long into My Sister the Serial Killer by Oyinkan Braithwaite. It was her debut book, which may be why it falls a bit flat. Just as the title suggests, we follow Korede as she cleans up after her sister, Ayoola, who has a tendency to kill her boyfriends. As a massive horror fan, I was so disappointed in this book. I really, really wanted to like it. It was such a good premise, and the beginning was so strong. But that's all it has going for it in my eyes.

Ayoola decides to go after the man that Korede has a crush on at work. We're supposed to follow Korede's moral push and pull in the wake of another of her sister's murders while keeping the man she loves from being killed. However, it's never really felt. It's just a bit of wishy-washy back and forth inner dialogue. The climax didn't really hit a screaming pitch. It just kind of...comes and goes and then the book is over. Leaving us with an unsatisfying ending. You end up right back at square one, where the novel began. This is one book I would say not to waste your time on.

Luckily, I wasn't disappointed for long. I discovered a new favorite completed series. It was advertised comparing it to Howl's Moving Castle - which is my all-time favorite book and movie. I didn't think twice before I bought the first book. The Lord of Stariel is a gaslamp fantasy series. It has a historical type of fantasy setting, where magicians, enchanters, and illusionists practice true magic. Fae are still creatures of myth, but it doesn't stay that way for long.

The series follows Hetta Valstar, the estranged daughter of the Lord of Stariel. When he dies, she has to go back home to the estate of Stariel - a sentient Fae land that bonds with a person. The first book suffered similar to A Botanist's Guide to Parties and Poisons - when the climax came, they talked it out instead of it actually being climactic. But each subsequent book in the series gets better.

It has dangerous magic, a swoon worthy suitor, and an utterly whimsical world to get lost in. It even has a spin off book, A Rake of His Own, which follows Hetta's brother, Marius. I devoured all five books in about two months. I simply could not get enough. As a series, it's a 5 out of 5 and I can't recommend it enough if you like fantasy.

Sometimes, in the middle of reading a long series, you need a bit of a pallet cleanser. I broke up my reading with a book set in our own world. My Roommate Is a Vampire by Jenna Levine is a monster romcom, a genre I didn't even think existed outside of comics and manga. The book follows Cassie Greenberg, who's an artist struggling to make a living. She finds an advertisement for an apartment and quickly learns that her roommate is a bit of a weirdo. It definitely gave me a chuckle and had a bit of unexpected spicy. There are parts where the story gets serious, and the tone shift can make it a little muddy. But it's one of those books I'd recommend for anyone looking for a light read. The companion novel, My Vampire Plus-One, recently came out and I can't wait to sink my teeth into that one!

In real life, I don't have ton of friends who read books and most of those who do don't read the same books. So, I was surprised when my friend's wife let me borrow her copy of The House on the Cerulean Sea by TJ Klune. And even more surprised by how much I loved it. It's a cozy, enchanting story about a man named Linus Baker, who works at the Department in Charge of Magical Youth. He goes and evaluates orphanages that home magical youth. Every day he trudges through a never ending, grey storm. But one day he's summoned by Extremely Upper Management and sent to a house on an island, where he must decide if the children there are too dangerous.

I cannot put into words how charming this story is. I love all the characters, how warm the world feels, and the soft, subtle way that Linus and the head of the orphanage, Arthur Parnassus, fall in love. This was another book that I absolutely devoured. I can't sing its praises high enough. It's just a fun, feel good read. I loved it so much that I bought the recently released sequel - Somewhere Beyond the Sea. I haven't read it yet, but it's on my TBR. I can only hope that it lives up to the same standards as the first one.

Right at the end of December, I managed to squeeze one last book. I Was a Teenage Slasher by Stephen Graham Jones was my final read of 2024. It's a memoir written by adult 30-something-year-old Tolly Driver as he reminisces about 1989 - the year he became a slasher. I liked the idea; seeing everything from the killer's point of view, finding out what was going through their mind. However, I was sorely let down.

Tolly's narration is a stream of consciousness. Apparently, the whole thing is supposed to be type out on receipt paper. He bounces around from 1989, to previous years, to his present adult self and back. There were spots I had to read three or four times before I released which time period everything was taking place in. There were spots where the sequence of events or the actions of the character were unclear.

As a whole, I found the whole thing a bit ridiculous. It's supposed to be a horror thriller, a serious story about a serious character. But reads like a parody/comedy horror that's taking itself way too seriously. There were supernatural elements that could've been interesting. Tolly's transformation into a slasher was like an infection and the "powers" it gave him just pulled me out of it. I just found that the whole story fell flat. I read the whole book because I was too curious what ludicrous thing was going to happen next.

I'm normally a huge fan of horror comedies, but not when I go in expecting it to be a real, solid horror story. Anybody looking to read a decent horror book, I'd say pass this one over. But if you're looking for a horror parody, then you came to the right place. I'm disappointed since I've heard such good things about Stephan Graham Jones as a horror novelist. However, this was just not the book for me and ended up with a 2/5 on my StoryGraph.

As you can see, 2024 was definitely a wild year for my reading list. I found new series that I absolutely love and some books I will happily never read again. I'm looking forward to many more adventures this year, and I can't wait to see where those books take me. I especially can't wait to bring you all along for the ride!

Thanks for stopping by, and I hope to see you again soon!

- Whisper

Let Me Know: Have you read any of the books in my wrap-up? If you did, what did you think? What books did you read in 2024?

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[astriiformes]

hello!! this is kit. happy birthday!!! you don't have to answer all of these but

🎞️if you could change one scene from any of the movies, which one would you change and how?

⏲️what time period would you want marty to travel to and what would you want him to do? for fun or for something serious?

💫if you have any bttf related wips, here's the oppurtunity to ramble about them! (<-PLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLSEPLSPEL)

Thank you!!

🎞️ - If you could change one scene from any of the movies, which one would you change and how?

Oof, just one scene is difficult, because the thing I'd like to change most would be how Jennifer's plot was handled in the second movie, and that requires a bit more overhauling. I think you could still make it better with a little tweaking though -- maybe she doesn't get knocked out and is simply told to stay watch the DeLorean, which still ends up being a problem when she tries to lure someone away from it, or something like that.

I guess that still modifies more like two scenes, but you get the idea! Anything to make her feel like she's got a little more agency. Because I like her a lot and it bothers me that the BttF movies aren't even that terrible at writing women (Lorraine and Clara are both really interesting characters!), but sidelined her anyways.

⏲️- What time period would you want Marty to travel to and what would you want him to do? For fun or for something serious?

Already answered this one but since there are plenty of time periods to choose from I will simply pick another. As someone who studies the history of science, I think that Doc and Marty could get up to some peak shenanigans in Enlightenment-era America (thinking late 18th and early 19th century here) when everyone was obsessed with the phenomena of electricity. I want to unleash Doc Brown on the people that thought lightning rods defied the will of God.

💫- If you have any BttF related WIPs, here's the opportunity to ramble about them!

OH BOY DO I

So, four years ago I started a diptych of stories I am yet to finish but that are some of the fics nearest and dearest to my heart, surrounding the idea of Marty being transgender. (I once called them my love-letter to transmasculinity, which is a little dramatic, but genuinely a bit how I feel about them)

The first is from Doc's perspective, and deals with the fact that, when Marty was first born, the version of him who'd been visited by 17 year-old Marty back in 1955 must've had an absolute heart attack at first. It features a very confused Doc and (eventually) a younger Marty figuring some important things out about himself, and is probably about half-written at uh. Almost 9k words.

The second, companion piece is from Marty's perspective, and set post-trilogy, dealing with him navigating questions of identity as someone who is trans and who now grew up in a different timeline. It follows his relationships with the important people in his life, his dueling existential crises, and the isolating feeling that maybe there's no one who understands you in the entire world -- and the relief that comes from learning that you're wrong.

I've done a truly monster amount of research for these fics--including having a librarian friend help me track down digitized historical documents during lockdown back in 2020--and am contemplating diving into the historical queer archive where I currently work for a second round, though we'll see what I can find. Regardless, I really want to finally finish these stories now that I've circled back around to having a lot of Back to the Future feelings again.

(Also to show the BttF fandom that I'm a much better writer when I'm not churning out only-mildly-edited 1-2k fics every day for a writing challenge, rip, although I'm honored people have been enjoying those ones, too! Just, you know. I can do better.)

[steeltwigz]

has anyone seen marsh cry? (marshmallow cry lore)

I JUST rewatched the show and Marsh went through so much that I genuinely can't remember if we've ever seen her cry on screen before 😭😭😭 it feels like we must have but I'm rlly not sure 😭😭😭

I'm just gonna assume we Haven't. The thing is, Marsh is rlly open abt her emotions. She likes to talk abt things that bother her to her friends and solve the problems asap, I guess maybe barring the thing where she ran away w/o telling Paintbrush but that was kind of a complicated situation and she Was right that Paintbrush never rlly listened to her during the competition. That Being Said! I don't actually think she would cry often. She's tough and can Usually deal with things that upset her efficiently before they can become too overwhelming that she would start crying abt them.

I think probably in early season 1 Marsh would've had more situations that she didn't know how to handle and just in general she was a bit more helpless at the start, so she would've cried around Paintbrush more often. So they've seen it before (and hopefullyyyy act supportively). But since season 2 and living in the mansion, Marsh has matured a lot and become stronger and more able to defend herself so I don't think Apple or Bow have as many chances. I think there's good potential for one of them walking In on Marsh crying becuz I LOVEEEE those kinds of angst stories. If it Did happen that way, I think the reactions would be smth like. Apple freaks out, bursts into the room, and starts holding Marsh as tightly as possible until she feels better and promising to beat up whoever made Marsh upset, which is so startling and silly that it would always make Marsh feel a little better. Bow would phase through the wall awkwardly and try to ask Marsh what's wrong, and Marsh would get all surprised at being caught and then they'd talk it out. Dough would fly in, pretend like he's in the room for something else, and then once he had a read on the situation he would possess a pillow or blanket or bring snacks to give Marsh so she'll feel better. I don't think he'd snitch to Apple or Bow tho, I like to think he has some kind of awareness on Marsh's personality and can understand she would want her privacy to be respected.

I think actually they've seen Marsh cry once when she was super overwhelmingly happy tho, the first night she brought Apple back to the mansion and it finally sunk in that she was free from II and surrounded by the people she cares the most abt in the whole world. But they all spent that night sobbing and laughing and cuddling on the couch together, so it doesn't rlly count. Except Dough who was around but said the show of emotion was "an affront to the couch cushions" becuz of Bow's ghost mascara running and staining them so he left to watch spiders build webs in the basement. Apple and Bow have both tried to make Marsh so happy she starts crying again (becuz that night was also full of lots of cuddling and kissing and hugging and maybe sometimes girls just want to feel loved, okay?), but Marsh is a tough nut to crack AND she's smart so she can recognize what they're doing and use it to play jokes on them and annoy them. They have a whole secret corkboard that's covered in plans and ideas. Its not that secret cuz Marsh found it almost instantly and sometimes she'll add her Own ideas if she wants them to do something nice for her. Its a fun game, but now she's even More opposed to crying for any reason so that she can Win the game. The important thing abt Marshplebow is that they all love each other so so much, but they're also all competitive as FUCK and they love playing stupid little games and challenges with each other.

And actually I think MePad has seen Marsh cry too. In my headcanon lore, Bow possesses Apple by putting her soul in Apple's body and controlling it that way, meaning that when Bowpple left in episode 17, Bow didn't stay behind in the mansion (ig they were using phones to communicate or smth I didn't really bother w the logistics). After they explain the plan of Pulling the Plug on it all, Marsh decides she needs air and goes out on the porch to watch the ship where her gfs are. MePad follows her after a moment to offer his own kind of silent comfort and idk Paintbrush probably follows too, but they aren't important to the story rn. Marsh watches as the ship disappears in the sky, but the objects don't disappear instantly after that, it takes a few seconds for the effect to reach them. When it registers that the ship has disappeared and everyone is now perma-dead Marshmallow sniffles and gasps, unable to hold on to all the fear and sorrow of the episodes events and MePad, against his better judgement, probably just on reflex, turns to Marshmallow to try to comfort her. He watches as a single tear rolls down her cheek before she's gone and MePad is left alone on the mansion porch or like maybe on the ground beneath it, I kind of assumed the mansion would be a real building but maybe not. And now he gets to live with that memory forever ^_^ yayyyyy!!! I don't know if MePad has a favorite, but I always kind of assumed he cared abt Marshmallow and respected her more than he had for any of the other contestants. That's not saying MUCH becuz he very clearly cares abt them all, but I think Marshmallow is one of the most personal to him.

[hunty627]

A lot more stories that Grant can make up with his model trains when he rebuilds his model railway layout.

Paxton’s package. Paxton the diesel engine received a special package at the harbor. Sir Topham Hatt said it’s a gift for Salty to celebrate the anniversary of when he first came to the island. And the gift was an antique anchor from one of the very first cargo ships to ever come to Sodor. Will Paxton be able to keep it hidden from Salty before his party at the docks?

Ulli and Oliver. Oliver the great western engine was going to work with Ulli, one of the diesel shunters from the mainland. He really hopes the diesel can handle Dulcie & Isabel the way he does.

Samantha’s Santa special. Samantha the purple saddle tank engine is very excited. She was going to pull the presents train, as well as pick a coach for Santa to ride in so he can go to his grotto and give out presents for the children.

Rosie and Hector. Rosie was requested to collect an extra large load of stone from the blue mountain quarry. Paxton would normally do it, but he was feeling sick. But Rosie was nervous because she had to carry the crushed stone in Hector. Rosie was still a little bit nervous about Hector because she still remembered that he frightened her on his first day on Sodor. Will Rosie be able to forgive Hector for scaring her?

Double Timothy trouble. It was almost Halloween, and Timothy the oil burning engine heard a story from Thomas that there’s a ghost engine who shares the same name as him. The oil burning engine was rather nervous, but he had to do something because there can be only one Timothy on Sodor.

Amanda’s ghost hunt. Amanda was requested to take some passengers to go trick or treating from station to station when she heard a story from Fizzy. It’s a story about another E2 tank engine. He’s not as scary as Timothy aka engine number zero. He is known as engine 17.

Engines in space. Jupiter and 119 were visiting Sodor from their American railroad because they were to help Thomas with a brand new place on the railway. It’s a long tunnel with cardboard models of the planets. It was to make them feel like they were in outer space.

Mixed traffic trains. Sir Topham Hatt is trying out a new railway experiment, mixed traffic trains, which are trains that have coaches and freight cars together. Gordon thought the idea was ridiculous because he says passengers and freight don’t mix. He wouldn’t want smelly freight too close to his passengers.

Fizzy fizzles out. Fizzy the red tank engine was shunting freight cars when the ballast trucks began making him very upset. He gave them such a bump that he and the trucks came off the rails. To make matters worse, his fire bars collapsed. So he couldn’t deliver Coca-Cola to the stations. So he was sent to be repaired and Poy had to deliver his freight cars for him.

Robin’s race. The engines on the Island of Sodor were being visited by some of the famous engines from the mainland. Jimmy the Jinty and some of his friends, Simon, Robin and Terry. Sir Topham Hatt had requested Shedmaster Jimmy to bring them to visit and lend a wheel or three for the summer holidays on Sodor. Robin explained he’s as quick as the robins that nested on him years ago and Thomas challenged him to a race after telling him that he can go faster than the wind. Who will win the race from the quarry and back to Knapford station?

Engine ten thousand. Gordon was feeling very excited because a very grand looking engine is coming to visit from the mainland. It was a class W1 engine who has the number 10000 on his cab. He was known as Hush-Hush. He had come to fill in for Rebecca when she was sent to the works to be fitted with new boiler tubes.

Stephen’s great race. Stephen was feeling very excited because it was the anniversary of when he won the Rainhill Trials many years ago. He wanted to find a way to celebrate his anniversary. So, the engines decided that Stephen should race a horse pulling a single wagon from Ulfstead Castle to Brendam Docks. Will Stephen show everyone, especially Diesel that he’s more than just an antique, but a reliable engine with the heart of a champion?

Tiger’s roaring whistle. One day, an old fashioned steam locomotive named Tiger was visiting the Island of Sodor. Although he looks exactly like the one who used to work on the Liverpool and Manchester railway, he’s in fact a replica. After his long journey, he was given a new whistle that sounded a bit like a tiger roaring. Will he be able to put it to good use?

Henry and the holograms. Henry the green engine saw Ronnie the Amtrak engine was given a gift from Kenji in Japan. It was a hologram projector that will be fitted to the computer in his cab. A hologram is a three dimensional reproduction of an image. That way, Ronnie can download pictures from the web and make them look real. But Henry was a little bit worried that Ronnie might have trouble getting the hang of his new hologram projector.

Flash dashes in. A new high speed train has come to visit the Island of Sodor. His name is Flash. He’s 4 years old and he is eager to impress the other engines. But will he be able to fit in with Thomas and the other engines?

Diesels and Daleks. The engines were having an anniversary party for the show known as Dr. Who. Diesel, Timmy, Splatter and Dodge teased Percy and Poy about the Daleks coming to send the steam engines to the scrap heap by blasting their boilers to bits. The two little green engines felt rather nervous. But then Thomas had a naughty idea on how to teach Diesel and his pals a lesson. He spoke to Ruth the inventor, who had created remote control replicas of the Daleks for the party to help prank the diesel engines. And that night, just before the party began, they used them to scare the four diesels into thinking they were going to exterminate them.

[audhdating]

The Rules

Dating in my 40s comes with challenges I didn't have in my 20s: namely the role that age plays in dating dynamics.

My ex-wife Anna was 8 years older than me and we were married 17 years. The woman who recently broke things off with me was two years older than me. I've never been obsessed with youth as a marker of attraction. I'm far more drawn to who a person is.

That does mean there have been a handful of times where I've struck up a conversation with someone who turned out to be younger than the half-your-age-plus-seven rule. For me, that's 29. But I've found I don't usually mesh well with women that young.

But then there's the time I met a woman who's fun to talk to and into the same things as me and it turns out she's 25! She likes older guys. She's coming onto me. I had to tell her I couldn't. But the devil on my shoulder kept asking "Why not?" And part of me was like "Yeah, why not?"

I mean, Cougars and Silver Foxes are totally normalized now, right? So, is the age gap inherently exploitative? I got the sense that the older guys she had been with had also been complete pieces of shit. I just kept thinking about how I didn't want to be the next old, piece of shit who fucks up her life even more.

It was all too much. I couldn't handle the ethical implications, so I just walk away instead.

Fast forward a bit and now I'm talking to a bartender at a bar I frequent. I bum cigs from her, I share weed with her. We chat on smoke breaks and really gel. Eventually, she asks for my number so I can hook her up with weed.

She's 30.

We've been texting daily for about two weeks. I don't have the same anxiety about the ethical implications, but it still feels really weird. We talked about it already, so it's out in the open. She seems to accept my weirdness and likes talking to me. And I like her quite a bit. So, I'm entering this relationship cautiously. I just don't want to fuck things up.

[amethystsoda]

Tomorrow’s gonna be a big day! My former art student is gonna borrow a few volumes of Chainsaw Man and Blue Period for the first time 🥹

[deantfwinchester]

A Simple Request

Pairing: Joel Miller x Reader

Summary: After returning to Jackson, Joel and Ellie finally meet their neighbor, a young woman who teaches at the schoolhouse. While the two settle in, Tommy asks her for a favor - that she look after Joel and Ellie from time to time, when he can't. She's happy to help of course, and may find its a better fit than either could've hoped.

Part 1/?

Word Count: 818 (drabble length for Ch 1 honestly)

A/N: Honestly, we just need more content where Joel gets cared for rather than vice versa - that is mostly what this will be. First time actually posting anything, so let's hope I actually write the other chapters!

There's a lot of beautiful writing that shows how empathetic and caring Joel is to the people around him - it's his turn to receive.

___________________________________________

She met Joel on a Thursday.

To be precise, she met Joel and Ellie on a Thursday afternoon, a few days after the two came back to the house they’d left behind months ago. She’d caught a glimpse of the broad, somber-looking man and a chattering young girl entering the house next door to her own one night around Christmas, but when she’d gone to introduce herself the next day, the house was empty. Curious, of course, but not entirely surprising. Jackson was a kind of haven in a world ravaged by fungus, fear, and all the choices people make in between – and sometimes those people see the comfort they could have here and run back into the dark.

Wednesday, Late May 2023

One day, as the spring shifted from wet to warm, she saw them again while tending her garden, trudging back toward the house as Tommy led the way. The pair certainly looked worse for wear – exhausted, weathered, and in need of a shower for sure, but while the somber look he’d carried on her previous glimpse had lightened just a tad, the girl in tow was quieter. She looked around distractedly, and smiled softly to the other two when addressed, or nodded where necessary. Perhaps she just needed some rest.

Frankly, both of them looked to need sleep desperately, so introductions would need to wait until tomorrow. She greeted Tommy as he exited the house and ambled down the porch steps.

“Got some new neighbors for ya” he said, sucking air between his teeth, hesitant.

“Yeah I noticed. Didn’t get the chance to introduce myself back at Christmas, kept wondering what happened to them. He’s your brother, right?” This she already knew (the town talks, especially around the holidays) but she was pressing a bit, and Tommy didn’t mind.

“Yep. They’re staying this time, I hope. I’m real glad to have ‘em back.” He nodded, reassuring himself.

“I’ll bet you are. Get to know he’s somewhere safe, ease your mind.” She says, nodding along. “I’m excited to meet them, but they look like they need a while. When do you think I should…” she trailed off, confident Tommy could fill in the blanks.

“Yeah, maybe give ‘em a couple of days. Gotta warn you though, Joel can be a bit… prickly. He doesn’t mean anything by it he just, might take some time to warm up. If you’re willing to try.” He said, hesitantly.

She can tell he’s holding back, like there’s something to ask that he’s afraid to mention. She brushes it off, hoping to put him at ease enough to say what he needs.

“I’m sure it’ll be great. You know me, love a challenge” she says, inhaling with a brow raised.

“I do know that, you’re right. Schoolhouse sure is full of ‘em” he huffs a laugh and smiles at her, squinting in the May sun peeking behind the clouds.

“I got ages 5-17 down, I’m sure I can handle one prickly guy and his little girl.” She smiles back, and looks at Tommy with a warmth she hopes is reassuring; that it lets him know she won’t give up before she starts. She can tell he needs that for his brother.

“Listen, I’d really love it if you would try, even if it takes some time. He’s been through hell and back, they both have. I put ‘em up by you hoping, maybe, you’d keep an eye out? Make sure they’re alright every now and again?” She could see he was anxious to ask, but his concern for the two kept him from wavering. For the second time in their conversation she found herself wanting to assuage any fears he had in this regard. Of course she’d look after her neighbors; that’s what this community was built on, after all.

“Yeah, of course I will. Maybe I’ll bring some food by when I introduce myself tomorrow. Seem like they could use a hot meal to themselves -- dining hall can be a lot when you’re new” she said reassuringly, hoping her words and the understanding in her eyes would be enough to allay Tommy’s previous hesitance.

He exhaled a bit in obvious relief, “I think they’d like that. Ellie certainly will, at least. Thank you, really. You’ll tell me how it goes?”

“I’ll be sure to give you guys a full report.” she says, smiling. She says goodbye to Tommy, and he makes his leave, as she turns back to her weeding.

Joel and Ellie. Nice to put names to the faces. Already she’s mentally flipping through her rolodex of doable recipes, wondering what will get her some brownie points with Ellie, and maybe alleviate some of this hesitance Tommy’s warned her about. No matter – she spends her days at the schoolhouse, dealing with hesitant or moody kids of all ages, she can handle a little prickle.  

_____________________________________________________________

Part 2 is now up here !

[random-writerings]

Fitzsimmons - Teachers AU

• After Fitzsimmons retire, they live their idyllic life in a cottage in Perthshire with little Alya

• But when she's old enough to go to school, they get kinda bored

• They miss the thrill and excitement of working at S.H.I.E.L.D.

• Hell, they miss just having something to do all day

• So they decide to teach at S.H.I.E.L.D. Academy

• It's the best of both worlds; they stay informed about the goings-on in S.H.I.E.L.D., but they're far enough away from action that they can still claim they're retired

• Another upside is that they get to see their friends more often

• Of course the S.H.I.E.L.D. Science Academy is very excited to welcome them back

• They get a little embarrassed when students gush over them and their work, both in the field and the scientific papers they've published

• But eventually the excitement dies down and the students begin to love them as teachers rather than famous S.H.I.E.L.D. agents

• And after a while, what started out as a way to keep their brilliant, fast-paced brains occupied, becomes something they genuinely enjoy

• They love having a steady routine again

• Getting ready for work in the morning while also getting Alya ready for school feels so right, so normal

• Jemma makes them all lunch everyday, and of course she gives Fitz his beloved prosciutto and buffalo mozzarella sandwich with a hint of homemade pesto aioli

• They're also those teachers that have hundreds of mugs from students

• Fitz’s favourite mug is shaped like a monkey, with the tail forming the handle

• Jemma can't pick a favourite (“they were all chosen with care!”) but she really likes ones with science puns

• Even though they don't see each other much during work, they still love working together

• They run assignment ideas and exam questions by each other all the time

• They spend their evenings in comfortable silence marking papers and drinking hot chocolate

• Jemma is a very organised and professional teacher

• She plans lessons months in advance, has an extensive booklist for students that somehow keeps growing, and has made many posters and handouts about lab safety

• She also colour codes everything

• Her preparedness can sometimes intimidate new students but the older students reassure them that she's actually a very caring teacher

• She has lots of extra stationary and chargers that she can lend to students

• Even though she sets a lot of challenging assignments, she always finds the time to help out those who are struggling

• And she writes detailed notes summarising each lesson in case a student is ill or can't make it to class

• These are not used very often because students love attending her classes

• She's so passionate about her subject and she inspires that passion in others

• She also finds very fun and interesting ways to explain things and she's patient with students, offering extra study sessions for those who still don't quite get it

• She's not much of a sharer, preferring to stay focussed on the lesson, so her students know very little about her

• They know that she's married and that she adores her husband and daughter

• But that's pretty much it (apart from stuff on her S.H.I.E.L.D. file, like how she joined the Academy at 17 years old)

• Meanwhile, Fitz is total opposite

• He definitely plans his lessons, but they do tend to go off topic a bit

• It's not his fault that a student asked an interesting question and he had to find out right there and then if it was possible

• The students love how chaotic his lessons are and they end up learning so much more through the experiments than they would by just listening to his lectures

• He also has the messiest handwriting in the world, especially when he has an idea and has to write it down quickly before he forgets

• So he usually types things out and prints them off

• He starts off the year with neat folders and everything arranged nicely but a few weeks later everything is super messy but he insists he has a system

• He also overshares a lot

• And I mean, a lot

• He talks for ages about his badass and super smart wife and shows the class cute photos of Alya (with guest appearances from the other S.H.I.E.L.D. agents which are endlessly amusing to the students)

• “I've never seen Agent May smile before. She's always so serious, I didn't think she could.”

• “I knew Director Mackenzie was secretly a softie. Look at how tiny Alya is when he holds her!”

• But sometimes, these photos bring up hard to answer questions

• “Dr Fitz, is that Agent Daniel Sousa having a tea party with your daughter? I thought he was dead?”

• “Uhh, he is. That man is … uh, just a … family friend. They just look very similar.”

• “Yeah and what about that guy? I'm sure that's former Director Coulson, who is also dead.”

• “Uhhhh …”

• He always tells himself to be more careful which photos he shows the class, but he always forgets

• A lot of the photos also include Jemma but because there's not much crossover between engineering students and biochem students, most of the class don't recognise her

• The few students that do recognise her decide not to say anything because they know Jemma likes to keep her personal life private and they respect that

• They also think it's kinda funny that no one else has worked it out yet because it's so obvious once you know

[midnightswithdearkatytspb]

VelvetCardiganBucky’s Recommendations 2021: Week 17 | April 18th – April 24th

Welcome to week 17 of my recommendations, if you would like to be featured on a future list, I follow the hashtag #VelvetCardiganBucky, message me, tag me in your future works, or reblog this post and link to your story, one-shot, Masterlist, writing challenge, etc.

Be aware some if not most stories and writers on this list are meant to be consumed by an audience of those 18+. My blog is also an 18+ blog.

✨Page breaks are made @firefly-graphics✨

«Last Week

Week 18»

My Masterlist

My Fic Rec List of Mafia/Mob Bucky/Sebastian & Steve/Chris/Andy

Stuff I Posted This Week

Forever & Always: Stage 1 - Denial | Pt.1 » Bucky Barnes x Witch!Reader & Platonic Avengers x Reader — Y/N “Birdy” (nicknamed by her family), comes from a long line of witches and warlocks, living her days at the New Avengers Compound, alongside her friends. The Avengers are part of her family and her family is always welcome to the compound. Things for once seemed to be going well now that all was right from the attack on Thanos, everyone was alive, all was forgiven, friendships were thriving, that all ended when Birdy’s brother came calling with sad news, their mother had suddenly passed. These are the stages of grief Birdy faces, through the loss of her best friend, her protector, her mother.

His Favorite Day » Chris Evans x Reader — Chris’s favorite day of the year is your birthday.

Bucky Barnes

One-Shots:

*No Hidden Messages by @jobean12-blog » TFATWS!Bucky Barnes x Reader — Sam sends you a picture of Bucky and the endgame is priceless. | Honestly I love me some dominant Bucky, and if Sam had sent me that picture I would have dropped my phone and been like yep that my babe. I was thinking something more dirty but I’ll keep that thought to myself. 😉

Sucker Punch by @buckyblues » Boxer!Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader — Bucky thought he knew what was his, until he accidentally let it roam free. | Someone come dump a cold bucket of water on me please?

Someone Like You by @startrekkingaroundasgard » Bucky Barnes x Hydra Agent!Reader — Taken from their SHIELD prison cell, the reader finds themself alone with The Winter Soldier negotiating for their life. | I really enjoyed reading this, the sass of the reader and how Bucky handles them. It’s just so perfect. Nicola says there is more to come for this pair and I’m so very much looking forward to it.

(Mini) Series:

Happy & So Happy by @mrwinterr » Rockstar!Bucky Barnes AU x Female Reader — You meet your favorite artist and get more than what you bargained for. | The smut in this is hot and by the end you are hoping the reader gets a happy ending not a tragic one.

*A Tender Heart 💜 Pt. 3 by @river-soul » Alpha!Bucky Barnes x Omega!Reader — You’ve been sweet on Bucky since you started working at the compound six months ago. Normally quiet and mild mannered, an unexpected fight with a coworker brings Bucky into your orbit. [A/B/O dynamics and explicit sexual content, 18+] | I feel the love that is radiating from this story and I really love it and the little bit of smut we get in chapter 3 is perfect!

the (after) party by @buckycuddlebuddy sequel loft music » fuckboy!bucky barnes x reader — “why don’t we have this thing they call goodbye sex? one last time.” he leaned forward, his lips brushing your ear. “i’ll make it good for you.” | In some strange way it was therapeutic to read this but at the same time I felt bad for the reader in the first part. Second part you are rooting for her but still feeling bad. I will say the smut in this is perfect.

Just Like Dad Pt. 3 🦾 Pt. 1 🦾 Pt. 2 by @ladyfallonavenger » Bucky Barnes x Reader — Bucky finally confronts Steve and moves forward with his life. | Very sweet ending and I loved it.

Sweet Dreams 🥞 Pt. 4 🥞 Pt. 5 🥞 Pt. 6 🥞 Pt. 7 by @jedimastermelkor » Bucky Barnes x Reader & ? x Avenger — Your daily routine involves waking up in the morning, going to work and sulking at night. But then you meet the man you’ve fantasized about for your entire life, Bucky Barnes. At the same time, you’ve caught someone else’s eye and his first step in winning you over is to cook you breakfast. But will you be welcoming of that person’s affections? | I like how she named the puppy Pancake and the first thing the mysterious avenger gave her was pancakes. I don’t want to give too much away but things are getting really good and you find out who the mysterious avenger is in chapter 6!

Steve Rogers

One-Shots:

*Caught by @giorno-plays-piano » Bluebeard!Steve Rogers x Reader — If he kept you warm, saying words of love to you every day while he looked you in the face, you’d marry him even if in a year he hanged you just like all his wives in the dungeon of his castle. | It’s dark but in a soft way and it’s so good. I highly recommend you go and read it.

Drabble Request by @angrythingstarlight » Mafia!Steve Rogers x Reader — We find out how Steve and Reader met before they ever got in a relationship. Takes place before Tell Me What You Want. | I loved this so much, I was laughing and pictured this whole piece so vividly in my brain. Also I just want a part where Bucky teases Steve about that night in front of reader making her giggle, maybe at the wedding?

(Mini) Series:

*Yuánfèn 📖 Pt. 4 by @writerwrites » Steve Rogers x Reader — When you’ve lost everything and try to run away from your problems, you keep finding a way back to the one person who completely understands. Can you make another person happy with a broken heart? | I always look forward to the updates on this story. It brings me so much comfort and the relationship that is blossoming between the reader and Steve is beautiful and organic. I highly recommend this.

Misc.

Headcanons:

*Just Like Her Old Man by @rebelwrites » Chibs Telford x Reader — I asked for: Parents get called into school for a meeting due to their daughter fighting, and trying not to be proud. Taking them out for a treat after the meeting. | It turned out so great. If you knew me at my Sons Anarchy Days, you know I loved Chibs the most. This feed my love for him even more. Thank you Heather!!

One-Shot:

*A Simple Solution by @sweetlyscared » Andy Barber x Fem!Reader, Ari Levinson x Fem!Reader, Andy Barber x Fem!Reader x Ari Levinson — You and Andy had a purely sexual relationship for several months, and you’d started to grow attached to him. Unfortunately, life has a way of complicating things, and a chance encounter at a bookstore had you stuck between a rock and a hard place. | We all owe a huge thank you to Sweet Lee, for writing and posting this. She wrote our dreams out so perfectly, and if you haven’t thought of this now you can. It’s just so hot and good, I for one am very thankful.

(Mini) Series:

*Give In 🐈‍⬛ Pt. 23 🐈‍⬛ Pt. 24 🐈‍⬛ Pt. 25 by @overr-written » soft!dark!Lee Bodecker x Reader — She didn’t think she was anything special. So when the intimidating Sheriff takes an interest in her, she can’t help but feel a little unsettled. Her boring life is about to get a little interesting. | I love this series so much and the lengths that the chapters are. I really am going to be sad when this is over. I don’t ever want it to end. 😭

Seal Team

One-Shots:

Imma Take Care Of Your Body by @rebelwrites » Clay Spenser x Reader — Reader is the only female member on Bravo who also has a no strings attached relationship with Rebel. | Let me just say this is hot, like really hot. Give me a glass of water and let me cool down. Thank you Heather for blessing us with this.

Tier One Babysitters by @bravo-four-seal-team » Seal Team; Ray Perry x Naima Perry — Ray and Naima ask the team to watch 6 month old Jameelah. | I promise you will be laughing.

You Are Perfect by @rebelwrites » Clay Spenser x Reader — Clay tells you everything he loves about you. | As a big boned girl this meant a lot and has me wishing for a Clay Spenser to call my own.

[morsking]

is shirou a mary sue? the guy is universally well liked, cooks like a pro at 17, has the most op power from all fate (and arguably one of the most cool powers on media), nothing ever happens to him on the true/canon path of each route, he does many stupid things but no one cares 5 minutes later, other times like in salter vs rider he is just a tactical genius out of nowhere

he is not.

shirou is well-liked but he isn't particularly popular. he is known at school for being helpful and handy but otherwise not that many people are aching to get to know him or involve him in their lives. most people only know shirou very superficially. he is not sought after as a person, only as a handy man. there's a really neat scene at the beginning of hf1 where people are talking about shirou in the dojo and see that while he's earnest, hard-working, and talented, he's a bit odd and intense and that makes him a little difficult to approach casually. the only people who really like him are those who sit down and actually spend time with him. apart from the heroines of the story with whom he has time to develop a romantic bond, you don't see other girls falling head over heels for him. in fact, in hollow ataraxia the homurahara trio and mitsuzuri are quick to write him off as someone they are vehemently not interested in romantically whatsoever.

he only cooks like a pro because he had to teach himself to cook since he was 8. it's vital to understand that since kiritsugu became increasingly disabled and was utterly incapable of living as a normal human being, shirou was forced to grow up well before he was ready to take care of his adoptive father. he learned to cook, do the dishes, do the laundry, and clean the house because there were no other real adults in the house. shirou's domestic usefulness didn't come out of nowhere, it's a set of skills he took on out of necessity and came at the expense of his emotional growth.

shirou's power also isn't op. it's stated multiple times in the story how difficult it is for him to tap into it. he's not a natural mage with strong magical circuits, and neither does he have any real "useful" magical alignments that would make it easy for him to use conventional magecraft. every training session shirou has is a life-threatening act where he pushes his body and mind to the utmost limit for the low chance he might succeed at strengthening or projecting something. whenever he grabs hold of an ability that elevates his combat skills, it's either a) done with saber's help in the fate route, b) acquired as his soul inherits experience from his proximity to archer in ubw and receiving mana from rin, or c) obtained at the expense of the integrity of his mind and body as archer's arm starts to supplant his existence in heaven's feel. and even then, there's limits to what he can trace and project. he can't trace divine constructs normally as seen with ea, and his projections eat through his mana. think about what happens in heaven's feel too. every time he projects something with archer's arm he leaps closer to death because he can't handle the strain.

to say nothing ever happens to him in canon is also disingenuous. he doesn't die in a permanent sense, but take a moment to consider the amount of mental and physical pain he suffers that forces him to confront something about himself and change. did "nothing" happen when he faced gilgamesh and heracles with saber? is growing closer to her to find the best way to help her assert her personhood "nothing"? did "nothing" happen when he fought archer? is realizing the truth of your ideals and grasping the resolve to realize them anyway in a healthier and more self-aware manner "nothing"? did "nothing" happen when he fought heracles, saber alter, and kotomine? is saving your loved ones and claiming your life as your own after years of not seeing yourself as a human being to protect those dear to you so they too learn to love and accept themselves "nothing"?

take a moment to consider in what ways shirou is stupid that aren't contradicted by him being smart in others. shirou is socially inept and utterly incapable of asking for help because he is a traumatized teenager who doesn't know what a normal life is. he has few friends. he survived a fire. he is constantly trying to make up for being unable to rescue anyone in the calamity that destroyed his childhood. he constantly jumps in front of danger to save others for that very reason and refuses help because he doesn't want others to get hurt because of him until he learns to overcome that fear of being destroyed and seeing others be destroyed. he is dumb at being a person because he's never let himself be one. he is smart in a fight because he's at least been able to process his stress and trauma in a way that helps him rationalize his way out of a crisis.

i feel the need to stress that a protagonist having special qualities fit for the narrative isn't them being a mary sue. it's them simply being a main character with agency, a main character that is engaging and interesting. how boring do you think shirou and the story would be if he was really a shit-ass mcnobody with no talents, personality, qualities, or meaningful connections to the setting? he'd be no different from every other harem protag the cishet male audience can use as a self-insert. he is supposed to subvert ideas of masculinity by being domestic. he challenges conventional ideas of heroism by showing how his ideals are flawed and how important it is that he self-actualize.

shirou faces consequences for his inaction and inexperience multiple times too. saber gets frustrated because he won't (tell her why he really won't) fight and that causes a rift in their relationship he must fix with honesty and mutual understanding. shirou's inability to protect himself from hypnotic suggestion gets him kidnapped by caster and forces archer to rescue him, and in turn their shared stubbornness elevates their conflict to deadly levels until they're forced to fight to work out their differences. heaven's feel shows you how his unwillingness to forsake who he is to properly scold sakura and save her makes the situation worse when sakura loses faith that shirou will keep his promise to her until he decides he will fulfill it for both their sakes. people do care! saber cares when her master doesn't see eye to eye with her! rin cares that shirou is too willing to throw away his own life for others! archer cares that he is at risk of becoming that which archer can't forgive himself for being! sakura cares because seeing the man she loves come home bruised and bloodied every night is wrong! illya cares because he is her only true family! rider cares because if shirou can't be sakura's ally then she's as good as dead! everyone cares because shirou has to learn to care too, and he does!

i'm going to ask you to try to engage with media without trying to uncover flaws under rigid standards like this because all it does is keep you from properly understanding what is being shown to you. you cannot hope to judge a story and its characters for all their flaws or merits if this is how you approach things.

[cookies-and-creamless]

Balloon Art Day 3

Day 1 - Day 2

15. Giraffe - Unnamed

Before I got out of bed today, I whipped out a quick giraffe for a warm up. This giraffe is just a dog with different proportions, but I wanted to make a giraffe for a friend's kid. I didn't prepare at all beforehand, but from a purely balloon twisting perspective, I'm really happy with it. One small detail that doesn't show up super well in this picture is that I made the front legs longer than the back. Giraffes' legs are pretty even, but you can clearly see a downward slope in their backs that can be approximated in balloon form by introducing a length difference. This one stopped living up to my expectations once I tried drawing the spots on. Sharpie works wonders on these balloons, but I didn't have a brown sharpie on hand in my bedroom. I used a crayola marker instead, which you can see didn't really stick at all. Ended up being a bit of a mess!

17, 18, 19. Heart, bow, flower - Mother's Day Ensemble

This heart here is my second attempt. It takes some effort to get a balloon to hold an angle like the one in a heart! Even more effort to do it without any swelling in the joint. You can see that the heart here is slightly inflamed, but compared to the one before it, it looks extremely healthy. Aside from that, the bow here is a little uneven, and the flower was intended to have six petals instead of five (one of them being a tad short), but after struggling a while with how I wanted the heart to look, I decided that today was going to be a "finish it even if it's not perfect" kind of day.

20. Sword

I consider this an important skill in the children's birthday party side of balloon art, and for the sake of possibly making a little bit of money at some point (it's so hard to do things on a just-for-fun basis nowadays), I've resolved to eventually perfect the blade. The challenge of the sword is inflating the balloon just enough that you can still make the few required twists while resulting in a round, inflated tip. Now, the bubble at the front of this one is a bit long, and that's not the challenging part, but I got a little turned around at the start of this one. The tip top is slightly under-inflated. Only slightly, though, so I'm satisfied with this as a first try.

21. Mushroom

This one was also a little sloppy, but it's such a cute little thing that I was really happy to finish it regardless. A developing theme is that I will make bubbles bigger than a tutorial calls for and run out of balloon faster than intended when I iterate the process. This mushroom has a slightly less robust cap than specified in the tutorial I followed, but once again, it doesn't matter too much. I find that it's pretty fun to not measure anything and just work it out on my own when something goes wrong.

22. Corn (failure)

This one involves weaving six balloons at once into basically a tall basket. I couldn't handle that many balloons at once! No biggie though, this was a big step up from what I've done up to this point. The mode of failure was a pinch twist, which is consistently a technique that I'm a little nervous about due to a fear of popping. This time, it was in between a lot of other bubbles and I must have pulled a bit too hard, because the balloon I was twisting did indeed pop. I feel comfortable saying I bit off more than I could chew here, but I'm exercising my jaw every day, so I'll come back around for this one another time!

23. Sword (not pictured)

This one was both to see if I could do it better this time, and because I just wanted to play around. I didn't do it any better this time though. I don't want to sit down for a day of nothing but swords until I get the inflation level to be perfect, but I think that might be the best way to learn. I'll keep working hard, whatever that looks like!

24. Camel - Wendy

Yup, that's right, she's meant to be a camel. I didn't get as much height as I'd have liked out of her hump because the bubbles that make up her torso are slightly different lengths. I was also cutting my balloon length pretty close at the end, because this is one of the rare designs that leaves the very end of the balloon inflated. Her front legs are also longer than her back legs, and not on purpose this time! I don't mind for now though. Hard to feel frustrated when I'm holding a cute little animal that I made!

[onlyfreds]

Birthday Drink | F.W.

Title: Birthday Drink

Requested: Yes/No

Summary: It’s Y/N’s 17th birthday, so the twins and her go out for a little drink.

Warning/s: mentions of underage drinking, alcohol, drinking

A/N: This is for “Day 4” for @theweasleyslut’s 2k writing challenge with the trope: getting drunk together and the prompt: “I think I forgot how to breathe.”

"It's already your 17th birthday." George said, "Let's go drink at The Three Broomsticks."

I playfully rolled my eyes at him, “Like we haven’t been drinking before.”

Fred gave me puppy dog eyes together with a small pout, “Please sweetheart.”

I sighed, how in the name of Godric Gryffindor do you expect me to say no to that face?

“Fine.” I said, standing up as I turned to George, “Better tell Angie, because lugging my own drunk boyfriend back will be enough. Thank you very much.”

“Hey!” Fred complained as his twin laughed, “Don’t worry, she already knows.”

Fred crossed his arms over his chest, “I can handle my alcohol better than everyone in this room.”

I giggled, pressing a kiss to his cheek, “Whatever you say.”

We started to make our way to the statue of the one-eyed witch when we heard footsteps and the soft meows of a cat that we were oh so familiar with.

The three of us exchanged a look before running over to the nearest pillar and hiding behind it.

“Did you hear them, my sweet cat?” Filch asked Mrs. Norris as he held up his lantern higher, “Students out of bed?”

The cat gave another small meow, as if in reply to her master’s question.

Their footsteps soon grew faint as they walked farther and farther from the pillar we were hiding behind.

“That was a close one.” Fred and George sighed in relief as we continued on our way to the statue of the one-eyed witch.

—

“Good evening Madam Rosmerta.” George greeted the woman with a small smile while Fred kept the door open for me.

“Hello you three.” She greeted, setting down the cup she had just finished wiping, “What’s got you three sneaking out on this very fine night?”

Fred chuckled, putting his arm around my waist, “My girl here has turned 17 today and we just thought that we’d get a drink to celebrate.”

Madam Rosmerta playfully scoffed as she placed three glasses in front of us, “Didn’t stop you three from drinking underage.”

I laughed, “That’s exactly what I told them.”

—

“And then w-when he’s about to ask her out, he suddenly t-trips and falls like an idiot.” George retold with a drunk laugh.

My boyfriend raised his hands in mock surrender, “What? I was too distracted by your beauty.”

“You know what?” I said, moving the glass of Firewhiskey away from George, “I’ll go and call Angie before George does something we all end up regretting.”

After asking Madam Rosmerta where the fireplace was, I went and threw some floo powder into it.

“Hey Angie!” I called into the fireplace, “Are you there?”

“Yeah.” She answered, “What happened?”

“Well, your boyfriend is drunk, so can you please pick him up?”

“Don’t worry.” Angie said, “I’ll be there in five minutes.”

Once the fire had died, I went back to where my boyfriend and my best friend sat.

“Hey darling.” Fred’s words were slightly slurred, “Where’ve you been?”

I chuckled, breathing in the faint scent of Firewhiskey coming from him, “Just went to the bathroom for a bit.”

“Take another shot, birthday girl.” George said, handing me another glass, to which I drank.

At that moment, Angelina arrived, George greeted her with a small smile and a hiccup, “Hey sunshine! Come to join the party?”

Angelina laughed, “No darling.” She said as she helped George keep his balance as he stood up, “I’m here to take you home.”

She guided her drunk boyfriend to the door before she turned to me, “Are you okay?”

I nodded, “Just a bit tipsy, but I can manage.”

As soon as they left, I turned to my boyfriend, who was looking at me with a sparkle in his eyes. Like I was the stars, the sun and the moon. Like I was the whole world.

I giggled, “Why are you looking at me like that?”

He smiled, the dreamy look remaining on his face, “I think I forgot how to breathe.”

I gave him a worried look, “Why? Are you okay?”

He nodded, pressing a small kiss to my lips, “Absolutely fine. I’m just sitting next to the most gorgeous girl in the world.”

Fred then stood up as I followed suit, and left the payment with Madam Rosmerta, “Come on princess, I think we’ve had enough to drink for one night.”

𝚃𝚊𝚐𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝:

@lumosandnoxwriting @gostupid-godumb @famdomhideout @nova-darling @gaycatlord-stuff @pandaxnienke @escapingrealitybyreading @catching-the-train-to-hogwarts ​ @lunylovelovegood @thefallengodesse (Send a Message/Ask or fill out my taglist form if you want to be added!)

[skullsandwineglasses]

A Dream of Splendor (2022) - Eps 4-20

A slow-burn drama with pacing similar to Ming Lan, but Ming Lan is much more down to earth. A Dream of Splendor is more idealistic. That’s not to say that it’s a bad thing though. 

Zhao Pan Er is a perfectionist, a control freak, overconfident, but at the same time, incredibly insecure. She’s a Mary Sue, but her friends don’t hesitate to point out her flaws, and the drama criticizes her too. 

Still, her intelligence is unparalleled and she always manages to get out of difficult situations and wins every challenge. Out of the three female leads, she’s the luckiest. 

Ming Lan is a bit more underhanded with her intelligence, but Pan Er parades it around more. I also think Ming Lan explored more diverse and complex themes about family relationships.

A Dream of Splendor feels almost like an idol drama with the romance between Pan Er and Gu Qian Fan, but also slice of life with how the three woman make a name for themselves in the capital through their self-established tea shop. 

There aren’t many bonding moments between the three FLs as I would have expected though. San Niang and Yin Zhang are always quietly sulking in their own feelings while trying to keep up with Pan Er (who’s currently riding a high from her honeymoon phase with Gu Qian Fan, and she’s almost oblivious to everything else). 

In terms of romance, Pan Er and Gu Qian Fan confess their feelings during episode 17 or so, and then they work through Pan Er’s insecurities and then have a solid relationship by episode 19. While they’re cute, I’m going to miss their flirting and witty banter back when they were still unsure of their feelings and things between then were still ambiguous. The sexual tension was great. Now, we’ll have to see whether their relationship can maintain steam for the rest of the drama (after all, we’re only halfway through). I want to see new interactions between them. Something that adds to the relationship and pushes it further other than just heart eyes and kisses. I wanna see growth. 

One refreshing aspect about Gu Qian Fan as a ML is that not once have we seen him be jealous or brooding or possessive. He can be overprotective, sure, but he never intervenes until things become dire at the last minute. He trusts Pan Er completely. Both in terms of her ability to protect herself and also about where her heart lies. We see this play out in the first moments of the first episode. He watches Pan Er handle the attackers until her life is at risk. He’s her backup. And this pattern continues throughout the drama. Pan Er’s teahouse is wrongly accused? She diffuses the situation and he comes in through the backdoor later to tell her who was behind the scheme. He was watching all along, but didn’t intervene because she had it under control. He’s like a guardian angel who watches over her. Like when she had to pretend to seduce Zhou She in order to save Yin Zhang, Qian Fan watched from afar and let her do her thing because he understand why she has to do this, and he never judges. We didn’t even know he was watching all along until he came in to help her wash her hands. Sometimes, he might disapprove, like her opening a teahouse in the capital, but he doesn’t judge. He knows she has a reason for everything she does, and he understands, even if he might not always agree. 

Another good thing about this drama is that there’s no angst or melodrama. Women are supportive of each other. And even Gao Wei, who’s jealous of Pan Er, has a compassionate side. Zhang Hao Hao is supportive and sisterly to Yin Zhang and forms an easy alliance with the three sisters. 

Sometimes it feels like the drama is setting up for some later angst though, like Yin Zhang having feelings for Qian Fan, but at the same time, you just can’t imagine that Yin Zhang would ever try to “steal” Qian Fan away from Pan Er. It’s still uncomfortable to watch though. What I do want to see though is Ouyang becoming jealous of Qian Fan, but I feel like Ouyang loves himself too much to be jealous of Qian Fan over Pan Er, who was the reason he felt forced to leave the capital. If anything, Ouyang is jealous of Qian Fan’s rank and station, not because Pan Er is now in love with him, but we’ll see. 

So what I foresee is the drama introducing external angst (i.e., situational obstacles) as opposed to internal angst (i.e., the leads making stupid decisions leading to misunderstandings and hate between them). 

The palace court plot is more of a background storyline, but it might become more prominent in the later episodes. There are too many names and old men to keep track of, and my mandarin isn’t proficient enough (despite me still insisting to watch cdrama raw). The dialogue in this drama is really quick, and I think I catch maybe about 80% of it. All I know is that there’s a tapestry that’s very important (and dangerous) due to what it reveals about the Empress’ identity that Pan Er gave to Ouyang and that Ouyang’s family servant gave away to a teacher. And Qian Fan, as well as others, are chasing after it. Then there’s the whole drama with Qian Fan and his estranged father, who’s corrupt, but he doesn’t want to be the one who brings his father in, despite their rocky relationship. Not to mention Qian Fan’s half brother who feels threatened by him. Pan Er’s story is simple. But Qian Fan’s relationships are just a tangled mess, and then on top of that, he carries the guilt of being the “living devil” because of all the lives he takes during interrogations. I feel for the guy. 

On another note, it’s also nice to see Dai Xu again in a comedic relief role. The last role I watched in was The Legends, which he was also great in. I was half expecting the drama to make him fall for Pan Er, but instead, he hates her because she keeps outsmarting him. Nice. 

On a spectrum of angsty to fluffy, this drama falls right in the middle, and with its witty and lyrical dialogue, I can see why it’s so entertaining to watch. I breezed through 20 episodes in 3 days.

It’s my first time watching Chen Xiao, and he is charming as heck. Liu Yifei feels really natural in the role and it’s as wooden as she’s often known to be. It weird how she feels more like Mulan here than in the actual Mulan movie. 

That reminds me that one gripe I had early on is how they didn’t show her actually steering the horse-drawn carriage but used a stunt double. Maybe for liability issues? But she’s no stranger to stunts. I loved how in Goodbye My Princess, you actually saw the actors riding horses. Same with The Rebel Princess. 

[royalreef]

@chaosmultiverse​ inquired: 2, 3, 6, 17 & 27 Romantic Relationship Questions - Accepting

2. Is your muse monogamous?

(( Nope! Of course, this is a little complicated because it requires discussion of merfolk relationships and their attitudes towards them, but in short, merfolk are not a monogamous species.

They tend to think of themselves in the plural to begin with, and that can make monogamous relationships a little more challenging and complicated for them than they are for us. Likewise, merfolk have an entirely different hierarchy of relationships, and because of that, romantic relationships can be much less important and focused on than certain types of platonic relationships, with certain not-necessarily-but-most-often platonic relationships taking precedent over all other types of relationship in their lives. Likewise, certain romantic relationships are prioritized and thought of as more important than other romantic relationships, and while there is a type of romantic relationship that takes importance over all others, it’s also something that is neither pushed for nor all that common, and most merfolk just never consider it and never want something like that.

This isn’t even getting into sexual relationships either, which merfolk have an entirely different outlook on, and often doesn’t even map onto their web of relationships as anything other than connective tissue.

But yeah. In short, it depends? When in doubt, ask Miranda, and she’s usually pretty quick to talk about boundaries and what is and isn’t alright with her partners. Most of the time she’s ambivalent-to-positive on having others in her romantic relationships, but sometimes she doesn’t want them and could not handle it, and there are types of relationship that she has that she will always have multiple partners in, but which aren’t shared with landfolk and are hard to talk about with them.

3. What would your muse’s ideal date be?

(( ..... Ironically? I don’t think Miranda has an ideal date. Yes, she’ll list you off countless fairytale scenarios and ways for her date to rescue her from a tower or wake her with true love’s kiss, but that’s just what Miranda will say. In terms of what her actual, true, ideal date would be... I don’t think she’s actually all that picky. She would like something tender, and intimate, and close, and where she can be genuine, but that’s still so broad that I don’t feel like that would fully count either. Mostly she just wants to feel appreciated and loved and safe.

6. How important is physical appearance to your muse?

(( I’m tempted to say not very, but this is a complicated one too. I will say — if you’ve gotten Miranda to the point where she is actually in love and in a long-term relationship, nothing will stop her. It does not factor in with the slightest, and Miranda is fully ride-or-die at that point, with nothing more to be said.

But when she dates around for fun and just to have flings, it’s... a bit more important, I suppose? As in, she is just doing that for fun and for what thrills her at the time, and she feels little guilt on turning someone down because they aren’t attractive to her. She wants someone who excites her, and often that includes if they look good as arm candy in front of others. But, remember, these are still the same relationships that she doesn’t have a problem with discarding and moving on from either, and those that get her in such a relationship haven’t achieved anything special either.

17. Does your muse like being asked out, or do they prefer to do the asking?

(( She LOVES other people asking her out. It’s partially an ego thing for her, but also she just likes the attention. She likes it when people fret over her and compete for her attention and for her love, and she adores it when people put in the effort for her. Not just what she asks of them, but truly going out of their way to sweep her off her feet. Ironically, this is the same reason why she basically never asks someone else out, as she instead prefers to tease and play with them and rile them up until they do so instead. It’s a game of gay chicken, and Miranda’s in it to win.

But she also tends not to ask out even the people who she actually does love, just for an entirely different reason. In this case, it’s moreso because of Miranda clinging to her denial and what feels safe to her, because actually getting invested in someone else doesn’t feel safe. It’s a risk, and it’s scary, and Miranda instead tries to avoid it or wait until it goes away, because she doesn’t know how to deal with her own affections towards someone else. She can’t put up her same defenses, she’s scared she’s going to get hurt, and she doesn’t have the same experience in genuinely loving someone in the same sense that she has experience in just dating people for fun. It’s tied to the same reason that Miranda gets so much easier to fluster if she’s in love with someone, to the point of that being a good yardstick on whether she’s actually caught feelings for someone else.

Though, in the latter case, moreso it’s the other person asking her out for sheer lack of Miranda doing it. She’s not intentionally trying to get them to do so, and honestly is so wrapped up in her denial that she would be okay with simply never asking them out at all. Again, she’s trying to wait until it goes away, because it’s scary and upsetting and new for her, and she’s trying to convince herself that if she just ignores it, then she won’t get hurt and nothing bad will happen.

27. Is your muse one to sit down with a new partner and formally define a relationship, or do they prefer to go with the flow and see what happens?

(( It depends! Tying back into the last answer — if Miranda’s genuinely invested in a relationship, she’ll try to avoid defining it as long as possible, rather going with the flow and letting it happen, over taking an active role. It can be endlessly frustrating for the other party especially to deal with, but Miranda feels safer with it. Putting words down to what they are means she has to directly confront her feelings, and she often doesn’t even know what they are or how she actually feels just yet. That time to work things out is important to her, since it lets her figure it out as she goes, and to come to terms with her emotions more slowly.

In comparison, if she’s dating someone for fun, she’ll often come right out and directly say what the two are. She doesn’t have shame about it, there are no complicated emotions to work through, and she can just immediately get to what she wants without a need to pause and think about it. She’s doing it for fun, and so she does whatever is the most fun for her. She’ll still play coy if she thinks that’s fun, and has no problem with beating around the bush if it means she gets to fluster someone else and use that as an excuse for further flirtations, but she has a very clear idea of what’s going on and doesn’t hide it from herself or anyone else.