#she wants to go on a normal date with him but it's a difficult subject and she's never been on a normal date and ahh!!

[cagesings]

 @heygutlcss  /  riff  sent:  ❛  what  do  you  want  for  dinner  ?  my  treat  !  ❜  

 they've  never  been  on  a  proper  date.  while  johanna  listened  as  other  girls  happily  discuss  every  detail  of  the  last  school  dance  and  awkward  classmates  shyly  ask  a  friend  to  go  with  them  to  get  ice  cream,  she  can't  even  admit  to  anyone  that  and  and  riff  are  something  together.  they've  participated  in  certain  things  in  the  back  of  cars  though  they've  yet  to  actually  get  caught.  the  amount  of  times  they  don't  realize  they're  holding  hands  in  the  hallways  might've  given  them  away,  yet  no  one  said  anything  about  it.  dates  for  them  are  occasionally  sneaking  off  to  the  library  together  or  stopping  by  the  supermarket  to  pick  up  a  treat  before  school  started.  that's  been  completely  alright  with  her.

 this  sounds  like  an  actual  date.  dinner.  together.  him  paying.  this  is  exactly  what  people  think  of  when  the  word  date  is  mentioned.  

 ❝  just  because  he's  out  of  town  doesn't  mean  you  have  to  pay  for  me.  i  have  other  ways  of  getting  ahold  of  money,  you  know.  ❞  a  whole  weeks  with  her  guardian  across  the  state  for  a  conference.  what  was  a  sweet  relief  before  has  turned  into  a  week  of  paradise.  they've  been  able  to  be  more  casual  about  everything.  more  free.  despite  herself,  johanna  feels  a  flutter  of  butterflies  soar  through  her  stomach  as  she  thinks  about  it.  she  assumed  that  was  behind  her,  yet  here  she  is  now.  

 though,  riff  knows  how  she  is  about  food.  aside  from  mrs.  eastman  and  her  guardian,  he's  the  only  person  to  have  noticed  something  off.  accepting  silly  treats  like  snoballs  or  zingers  from  him  was  a  difficult  step  to  take.  part  of  her  wonders  if  this  is  an  attempt  to  make  sure  she  eats  a  full  meal  because  he  can't  control  what  she  does  during  lunch,  yet  the  flutters  in  johanna's  stomach  win.  she  wants  to  go  to  dinner  with  him.  

 ❝  you  really  don't  have  to.  ❞  brows  raise  as  if  to  ask,  you  would  do  that  for  me?  ❝  mrs.  eastman  cooks.  ❞  she  knows  nearly  every  way  to  make  it  look  as  if  she  ate  everything  on  her  plate.  ❝  besides,  i  don't  know  anywhere  in  town.  we  don't  go  out.  ever.  we  should  probably  be  saving  our  money  if  anything.  we  can  meet  up  to  do  something  else  instead.  ❞  it's  her  own  fault  she's  loosing  this  chance,  yet  she  doesn't  want  to  give  it  up  entirely.  ❝  if  you,  um,  really  wanted  to  --  which  i'm  not  saying  you  should  --  where,  uh,  would  you  want  to  go?  ❞

[gyuswhore]

Hits Different (...'cause it's you) [teaser]

«« I trace the evidence, make it make some sense Why the wound is still bleedin' »»

READ FULL FIC HERE!

PAIRING: kim mingyu x reader

SYNOPSIS: Kim Mingyu was the first friend your brother had brought home for dinner. Fast forward a couple years, his toothy smile and pierced ears would wedge their way into a permanent place in your heart. Nail to a coffin, never to escape.

or;

in which you get rejected by the only boy you've ever loved; a rejection you can't quite shake off.

GENRES: based off of 'Hits Different' by Taylor Swift, brother's best friend!au, brother!seokmin, fluff, angst, smut (none in teaser) [MINORS DNI], friends(?) to lovers, university!au.

PLAYLIST: right here!

WORD COUNT: est. 25k

WORD COUNT [teaser]: ~820

RELEASE DATE: est. october 2nd 2023

!PLEASE SEND AN ASK TO BE ADDED TO THE TAGLIST (ageless blogs WILL NOT BE ADDED)!

masterlist

WARNINGS [!is subject to change upon publishing of the full fic!]: slowburn, mingyus a bit of an airhead and an ass, reader has a hard time managing her feelings, lots of frustrated tears, one sided pining, user toruro x minghao make an appearance, swearing, there's another woman (gasp,,,,,but shes cool so), Nayeon is a darling, Seungcheol is kinda annoying here but we love him, (smut tags in the full fic)

[A/N]: I worked rlly hard on the banner pls look at it ‼️ enjoy hehe also this is probably gonna be way more than 25k but I supposed its better than overshooting

teaser under the cut!

It’s a black sedan that rolls up next to you, slower than what’s considered a normal speed on an empty street. It honks and you nearly halt, owing to the shake that passes through your knees. It honks again, and you can’t help but look to the side to find a window rolled down. 

Mingyu sits on the driver’s seat, leaning over to the empty passenger side to grab your attention. 

“The Uber’s free! So is the driver,” he yells out the window. “Hop in.”

“I’m alright. I kinda wanna walk.” You shift your weight between your feet, the distance adding an awkward feel. 

“Wasn’t asking. It’s the middle of the night, I’m not letting you walk alone.” As he speaks, another car passes from behind him, slowing down. You note the look the other driver is giving you through the window, and it’s enough to convince you to step into Mingyu’s car. 

“I think we’re way past the point of formalities, don’t know why you hesitated.” He chuckles as he motions for you to click on your seatbelt. You fumble with it for a moment, his own fingers coming to the rescue to latch it on. You retract your fingers before they can brush with his own any further. 

Settling into your seat, you choose to look forward as he picks up speed. “Uhm, just wanted to walk, it was nice outside.”

“Take someone with you next time, it’s nearly midnight,” he warns. 

There’s a twinge of annoyance that emerges in the back of your mind for some reason, despite knowing full well that he was right. You just didn’t want to hear it from him.

It’s silent for a bit as the radio plays an uncharacteristically upbeat tune, prompting you to wonder if it was just you who felt the atmosphere pressing in on your chest.

“Did you not bring your car today?” he asks out of the blue, eyes remaining on the road as you glance up at him. One look at his side profile and you’re turning your gaze away.

“No, it’s at the workshop. I came with Nayeon.” 

“Why didn’t you leave with her?”

“I…” You pause. “I told her I was gonna go with Seok.”

“Hm. That didn’t happen.”

“It’s like I said,” you mumble.

He hums again in response, dropping the subject.

“Listen, are you…are you okay?” he starts again and it has you looking back up at him. 

“Why wouldn’t I be?” You try to hide the bitterness in your tone but it proves difficult.

“I couldn’t help but overhear but I was sitting right there. Hao was talking to Mika about something she’d said to you, about…” He trails off. “I mean, you looked a little upset, I just wanted to ask if you were okay.”

You bit your tongue. Hard. 

He knew you were staring at him, he knew you weren’t over him. He knew you were still standing on the same square confinement from months ago. Never changed. 

“I’m fine,” you reply, snappier than you had intended. 

“Are you sure? I felt like I should’ve said something but Nayeon was right there so I thought…” He sounds unsure and when you see him look at you, with eyes filled with an emotion that makes you nearly gag, you almost lose it. You did not want him to pity you. Nor care for you; especially when it came from a place that nullifies your feelings. You didn’t want him to care for you for the sole reason that you were his best friend’s sister. 

“Mingyu, I think it’s best if you drop it.”

“Of course. But it might help if you wanna, you know, feel your feelings.” 

Fuck no, you weren’t crying in front of him. Not when you're sure he’s noticed the tear stains on your makeup.

“Mingyu, I said drop it. I don’t need your help, I don’t need to feel anything, I need you stop feeling like you’re obligated to care about me because you’re not.” The words come tumbling out before you can stop them, irritation laced in every snap and dent.

He says your name in an attempt to smooth you over. It only lands him in more trouble.

“No, listen, I get it. You’re uncomfortable about everything but you feel like you need to check up on me at the same time, and I’m here to tell you that you don’t have to worry about that. What happened, happened, and it’s my job to pick up the pieces because it’s my fault. You don’t need to meddle.” You’re breathing hard as you finish, finally settling back in your seat. 

He’s already pulling up to your building, heat still penetrating the silence. You unbuckle your seatbelt, mumbling a thanks for the ride. 

“Seok’s staying at Cheol’s tonight,” he calls out as you shuffle out the door. “Remember to lock the door.” 

You stand sheepishly holding the open door as you nod quietly. “I’ll see you tomorrow for the shoot.”

[heliads]

Back again!!

This time, could I pretty please request by most beloved pilot Natasha Trace with a female reader? The reader is also a pilot with the Dagger Squad, and she and Phoenix are already dating. Reader is always super sweet and cheerful and friendly, so her callsign is Sunshine, and nobody in the Dagger Squad including Nat has ever seen her get angry, but one night when the Squad’s at the Hard Deck, Sunshine hears some guys talking crap about her friends and goes off on them, shouting and cursing them out in front of everyone, while the Daggers just watched with dropped jaws and Phoenix has the world’s biggest gear eyes and gives her girlfriend a big kiss once Penny throws the guys out.

Hopefully this wasn’t too much, I kind of went on a ramble (😅). Thanks so much in advance, and I hope you’re doing well, my beloved!! 🖤

'sunshine storms over' - natasha 'phoenix' trace

masterlist

According to the well-known and well-cursed laws of physics, an object, once in motion, will remain in motion unless acted upon by an outside force. Similarly, in the hallowed halls of Top Gun, a pilot will remain in their plane or briefings unless they receive a suitably alluring reason to leave. The reason doesn’t even have to be good half the time. Sometimes, the reason can be something as simple as drinks half price at the Hard Deck, and then every damn pilot in the whole place will suddenly find themselves leaving as quickly as they can.

Natasha Trace enjoys physics a normal amount, but she can certainly attest to its relations to drinks-happy fighter pilots. It’s been a long week, as most at Top Gun often are, so everyone’s more than eager to leave. She swears she’s caught Rooster falling asleep during long meetings at least twice already, even despite him pledging early this Monday morning that he’d be totally focused from then on out.

In his defense, the warm rooms of the lecture halls combined with the lights off is an equation for disaster. The projected flight plans aren’t quite bright enough to keep the pilots awake, and when they’ve been locked in one of those rooms for a couple of hours into the late afternoon– well, Natasha herself has been at risk for nodding off, so maybe she can’t judge too harshly, either.

Unlike Rooster, though, Natasha’s got a pretty good reason to stay awake. Pretty and good are also two remarkable attributes of this lovely, lovely distraction that Natasha is fortunate enough to call her girlfriend. When Nat was called back to Top Gun for the first of many top secret missions, she expected to find herself subjected to difficult flight conditions, extreme danger, and plenty of risky maneuvers. She certainly didn’t expect to get a girlfriend out of the bargain a month or two later, but she’s not going to complain.

Certainly not when her girlfriend is Y/N L/N. Nat has felt the blow of being a female pilot in a room of men far too many times to count, so when she walked in on her first day and saw Y/N already there, Nat had known that she was going to be alright. As time went on, Y/N had steadily grown on her, and then Natasha had come to realize that she wasn’t just grateful for the other woman’s friendship, she wanted something more, something like love, which Y/N was all too happy to give.

It’s a little self-serving to call your current relationship a power couple, but for once, Nat is pretty sure that the other pilots would agree with her. She and Y/N are the top scorers on the various training scenarios every single time. If you’re going to check a results sheet, odds are you’ll see Phoenix and Sunshine in the best slots. Rooster and Hangman always say that they’re the best, but the names never lie.

Usually, that kind of relentless domination would irk the other pilots, but Natasha and Y/N are friends with all of them, so that takes the edge off a little. Besides, it’s basically impossible to hate Y/N. Her callsign, Sunshine, is probably the most deserved nickname a pilot has ever been given in Top Gun history. Y/N’s all smiles even on the longest and most tedious days. She’ll be beaming ear to ear when she shoots you out of the sky, or when you play the piano for her at the Hard Deck. Both are fine by her.

During the first few hours of Natasha’s return to Top Gun, she was disheartened to see so many of the other pilots brushing off Y/N’s skills due to her bubbly personality. It’s not as if every great pilot has to be completely coldhearted, but apparently it was just too much to comprehend that someone could be nice and capable at the same time. Certainly Hangman seems to believe it still, but that’s beside the point.

Natasha had been ready to defend Y/N from the very first moment, but, as it turned out, she hadn’t needed to. Y/N got in her plane and outstripped all of them by a long shot. She even had Maverick complimenting her when she touched down. After that, no one said a word, and it became universally acknowledged that if you were planning on facing Sunshine in a dogfight, you’d be walking out with a new loss under your belt. So it goes.

Nat’s come to love that about Y/N, the sharp contrast between her cheerful personality and her cutthroat fighting style, how she’d been able to prove everyone wrong without losing her cool. To this day, Natasha has never seen Y/N get angry. She’s been decidedly neutral when she thinks someone is wrong, but she’s never been truly irate.

Certainly never with Natasha, at least. When Top Gun’s usual slew of meetings is over for the day, Y/N finds her way over to Nat, smiling delightedly at her girlfriend. “Are you up for drinks later?”

Natasha laughs. “Oh, you have no idea. I think this is the longest week of my entire life.”

Y/N grins. “What, you don’t like being stuck in sweltering rooms until you pass out? I can’t believe it.”

Natasha rolls her eyes. “Easy there, Captain Sarcasm. I know you were nodding off too, don’t try to pass this off like it’s just me.”

“I would never dream of it,” Y/N promises solemnly, then giggles again.

Rooster comes up behind the two of them, slinging arms around both of their shoulders. “Did I hear someone offer to get drinks?”

“You did,” Y/N says in a sing-song voice, “I won’t force you to come if you don’t want to, though. I’m sure Cyclone would be delighted if you stuck around a little longer to go over the flight plans a few more times.”

Rooster groans loudly. “I’ve heard more about flight plans than I ever want to again. No thanks.”

“You’re a professional pilot,” Natasha points out. “What else would you hear about?”

“Friends who are nice to me?” Rooster offers.

Natasha chuckles. “You ask for too much. See you at sundown?”

“Count on it,” Rooster promises. “I’ll rally the Dagger Squad. Be there or pay for everybody.”

Natasha waves him off, leaving the two women alone again. She sighs contentedly at the thought of the night ahead. After all the work they’ve been subjected to over the past five days, the thought of an easy weekend with friends sounds sublime.

And, arriving at the Hard Deck just as golden hour turns into blissful twilight, Natasha thinks she couldn’t be more right about that. Y/N’s a perfect picture as always, not a hair out of place, her off-duty uniform crisply ironed. She smiles when Natasha twirls her, and allows her girlfriend to lead her inside where the rest of their friends await.

The Dagger Squadron has sunk many a night into the Hard Deck’s cheery warmth, and by all accounts, this evening is shaping up to be another lovely endeavor. Bob and Payback have started up a round of pool, and Rooster’s already eyeing the piano. He might be held back from bursting into song by Hangman, though, who’s just getting started on his usual blow-by-blow of the day’s dogfights. Coyote is listening in, looking ready to rescue Rooster should the situation get urgent.

After stopping by Penny at the bar to grab some drinks, Y/N and Natasha make their way over to their friends. Natasha is just starting to lose herself in the usual blur of singing along to the music piping through the fading speakers, laughing at Fanboy’s increasingly dramatic pool trick shots, and dancing with Y/N, when something just has to go wrong.

It feels unfair on a night like this. However, that doesn’t stop the fact that some ass from across from the bar feels the overwhelming need to pause by their happy group on the way to get another round of drinks for the rest of his douchey friends, eye all of them with obvious disdain, and say loudly, “Gee, they let anyone in here, don’t they?”

Dead silence from the Dagger Squad. By Natasha’s side, Y/N arches a brow at the guy and asks slowly, “What do you mean by that?”

Natasha exchanges a panicked glance with Rooster behind Y/N’s back. Y/N’s grin hasn’t slipped, but it’s gained an unsettling edge that Natasha has never seen before.

The guy, however, doesn’t know Sunshine as well as the rest of them, so he has no idea that he’s headed into dangerous territory. Instead, he just guffaws. “God. Navy. None of you get sick of keeping your heads up your own asses, do you?”

Y/N’s eyes flash. It occurs to Natasha that for once, the other woman isn’t happy anymore. More than that, she’s angry. She’s furious.

“I know some pathetic excuse for a man didn’t just try to insult us,” Y/N begins, voice like a razor. “I know you wouldn’t do that. Were you dropped on the head as a child? I mean, it would make a lot of sense, but it still doesn’t excuse how unbelievably stupid you’d have to be to say that.”

The man stares at her. “Don’t talk to me like that.”

Y/N folds her arms across her chest. “Would you prefer that I be nicer? Funny, because I’d much rather call you out for being a fucking asshole with shitty fashion sense and even worse taste in drinks. I’ve seen high school recruits with more muscle mass. If you’re going to be a douche, do it in the privacy of your own home so the rest of us aren’t fucking bothered by a waste of space like you. You make me want to get blackout drunk just so I forget that creeps like you exist.”

The guy is gaping at her now, but Y/N’s on a roll. “Get the hell out of here or I’ll kick your ass. I’d ask if you thought two black eyes would fix your face, but I think that’s a mess nothing could improve.”

The guy looks like he wants to say something back, but Y/N takes a threatening step for him and he practically runs to settle his bill and head out. Y/N watches him like a hawk until the guy heads out the door again, leaving the rest of the Dagger Squad to look around at each other in complete and utter shock as if they’d seen something impossible. Which, up until less than five minutes ago, they had.

Y/N glances back at Natasha and begins to look a little chagrined. “Was it too much? I just got so mad hearing him talk about the rest of us like that, is all.”

Nat shakes her head frantically. “No. No, it was– it was great. I think you should do it all the time.”

Y/N cracks a grin at that. “That might be a little extreme, but I have to say, it felt good. I like scaring men.”

“I like it too,” Natasha breathes, and swoops Y/N into a kiss that lasts several heartbeats.

Friendly chatter returns to the Hard Deck by the time they break away, but for once, Natasha couldn’t care less what everyone else is doing. All that matters is the woman in front of her, Nat’s girl. She’s always known that Y/N was intimidating, especially in a jet, but this is something altogether different. Judging by the way Natasha’s heart keeps tripping over itself whenever she thinks about the incident, she’d have to admit that it’s a good sort of difference, too.

requested by @faerieroyal, i hope you enjoy!

top gun tag list: @luckyladycreator2, @atarmychick007, @ramenyul, @mayfieldss, @nonsensical-nonce

all tags list: @wordsarelife

[indras-curse]

Hi! I’ve been trying to look for someone to do this idea I had. So like Sakura and Naruto are in a trial relationship for a few months. Then on a date both say to each other “look we need to talk.”

Turns out they both gay (sasunaru and inosaku)

I love this

----

It was an "If we are not dating someone by the age of 25 we will just date each other"

Year after year being single opened up the possibility more and more, by the time Naruto's birthday was coming up, they were already planning their first date. Sakura was single as fuck and there was no chance Naruto would be able to get in someone in less than a week.

So, to end their perpetually single status, they started dating.

It was fun, not quite different, but fun. They started sharing a bit more skinship, meaning they would cuddle close under the same blanket, chill each on their own phone laying on the same bed.

It was a couple months already when they realized they hadn't had their first kiss yet.

It was awkward, to say the least. They had both kissed people before but they pecked on the lips, closed lips and not more than a couple seconds.

They didn't do that often.

Holding hands, waiting for each other, having dinner together, buying each other gifts, going out to clubs... All of that stuff they did before.

People were surprised to learn they were dating, they were acting around each other like normal.

"I'm sorry" Sakura starts one day, they were eating dinner in her house, takeout because they took shifts at the same time and nobody had the chance to prepare anything to eat.

"Hhng?" Naruto asked around a mouthful.

Sakura made a face. "You're actually making this easy"

Naruto swallowed and wiped his mouth. "Making what easy?"

"I think we should break up" Sakura blurted, to the point and without any prep. She felt bad about it but sometimes her solution to approaching difficult subjects was to bulldoze through them and just be blunt.

"I, uh... Why?" Naruto asked, seeming confused more than upset, so Sakura counted it as a win.

"I just- don't think we click, you know? I thought you and I would make a good couple because we've been friends forever and we like the same things overall. I put up with your foolishness-"

"Now that's just being mean"

"-and you put up with my bluntness and unladylike manners. But, I think attraction is just not there" Sakura sighed, defeated.

"That's okay" Naruto leaned back, a thoughtful expression on his face. "Is it bad I'm not too upset about it? Will we still be friends?"

"Of course will still be friends" Sakura smiled.

"Then I am okay with it. Not gonna lie, you are beautiful and funny, you're my best friend but I also don't see this going anywhere so it's good you ended it"

Sakura thought that had she been seeking reassurance that Naruto liked her this would have gone very wrong. She isn't neurotic enough to be upset about Naruto's lack of tact in a hypothetical situation, though.

Weeks later while having lunch with their friends, Sakura catches Naruto staring at Sasuke.

The three of them had been friends a while ago but Sasuke left their friend group for another one and while their relationship was overall amicable, they weren't exactly on speaking terms.

At least he and Sakura weren't.

Sasuke was a notoriously quiet guy, but he always took the time to tease and rile up Naruto. Not only that, but when Naruto was really troubled, Sasuke also made time to be there for him.

"Close your mouth, flies are going to come in" Sakura teased nonchalantly.

Naruto snapped his head to her, face red.

"I do not have my mouth open!"

"Like a dog staring at a snack he really wants" Sakura nodded.

"Shut up, that's not true!"

"You look at Sasuke like he hung the Moon and the stars. You're a goner"

"No way! I am looking at him just the same way you stare at Ino, just- just friends noticing another friend in a crowd"

"God" Shikamaru groaned. "You two are idiots"

Neither Naruto nor Sakura would later confess how embarrassingly long it took them to realize.

[kishibe-kisser]

Hi :) can I request a Ghost x fem reader where he realizes he loves her during a battle he thinks he might not make it back from. And him confessing to her once back at base? You can mark it smutty if you wanna. :)

Oh I love a bit of angst. I got you.

Same Book Different Chapter (Ghost/Angst&Fluff)

The apartment was quiet aside from the rustling of his bag as he packed his bag. It had been quiet for the last few hours and you felt like even breathing was annoying him. The air was thick with your anxiety and his fear, even though he wouldn't let you know it.

Looking at him from the couch, you pulled your knees to your chest. You had a lot of things you wanted to say, alot of feelings you wanted air out but everytime you opened your mouth it was to dry to say a word. It didn't matter, Simon's actions had made it very clear that he wasn't in the mood to talk. You hadn't been in a relationship very long in the first place but in this very moment you felt it dwindling. His job made things difficult and you knew this when you started dating. In this very moment though, you weren't sure there'd be a relationship when he returned.

You loved him, you loved the person he was even like this. You'd never said it and he never returned the thought remotely, despite that you still loved him. You liked to think you were both on the same page, well maybe the same chapter... well maybe the same book.

"I'm going to bed, you can join or continue to sulk on the couch over there." His voice was gruff and laced with sarcasm. This was how he joked, you knew that and while you forced yourself to laugh, you couldn't bring yourself to make it sound genuine. "There we go." He remarked, holding out a hand for you to take with a small smile. There was definitely a place in his heart for you, you just weren't sure how big it was and well, neither was he.

You spent your night tossing and turning while he slept, or so you thought. Simon couldn't sleep a wink, he never could before going on a mission and well your moving around wasn't exactly helping. He wanted to comfort you but at the same time the weight on his shoulders was heavy enough, your worry wasn't needed. Simon liked you, he liked you alot but in moments like this he knew he would have been better off single.

"Hey, eyes open. What's your problem today?" Price shouted, making sure his voice was loud enough to be heard over the whirring of the plane engine. Simon opened his eyes and just grunted in response. He was trying to catch a few minutes of extra sleep before being dropped in the middle of whatever hell hole they were going to. "Love issues?" Soap teased and his eyes shot open once more, glaring over at the team. It was none of their business.

"Y/N causing you grief? Thought you liked her... alot." Price asked and Simon just shook his head. "Couldn't sleep last night, she kept moving and tossing and turning. It was irritating." He grumbled, lying through his teeth. He thought it was irritation, it was a newer feeling for him the guilt of leaving someone behind before going on a mission misread as irritation.

"She's worried about you. It must be nice to have someone waiting for you when you get back." Price looked at him and Simon shook his head. "I'm thinking about ending it when we get back." Simon felt an ache when he said it, a sign telling him what he was saying wasn't right but he ignored it. Whether he liked you or not, it wasn't important. Your worry was a burden he didn't need, at least he thought he didn't need.

"Let's change the subject shall we." Simon silenced the murmur and opinions of the rest. They were his good mates and normally he didn't particularly care about the things he had to say when it came to relationships, but this was more sensitive to him than he realised. He shut his eyes and rested his head in his seat, still searching for sleep that would never reach him.

He was on high alert, gun tucked into his shoulder as his eyes darted around the room. It was quiet, too quiet and he didn't trust it for a second. Simon could see it in the whole team, everyone was on edge and it was rare for an assignment to have everyone feeling this way.

"Ghost, you got a bad feeling too?" Soap asked, making eye contact with him through the mask. "Yeah, never quite understood what Y/N meant when she said she could feel it in her stomach but I'm starting too." He said, thoughts of you unexpectedly flooding his brain. "She always talks about this wave of nausea and scrunches her nose." He added on, thinking about just how cute you actually were. "Thinking an awful lot about her even though you wanna end it." Soap remarked whipping his head around to see if there was movement in his peripheral vision. "Ending it is on my mind. That's why I'm thinking about her." He lied and raised his gun. "Movement to the left." He added on, hoping the thoughts about you would leave. He needed to focus.

"Oh shit, we got a big group of guys coming this way." Soap called through the coms as they started taking fire. The rest of the team was retrieving data as they returned fire, hiding behind a wall. "We'll be back soon, try holding them off." Price told them through coms, making Simon sigh before laying down fire.

"How much longer?" Simon called through coms, not appreciating that it seemed like the rest of the team was taking their sweet time to get back. "Don't get your panties in a twist, we're coming back now. Some cover fire would be nice though." Price told him, matching his irritate tone. Bumps in the road like this weren't a welcome surprise. "Better be no more surprises." Soap remarked and Simon could only shake his head. "Better be."

Shots rang through the building and Simon thoughtlessly returned fire, at first. The intrusive thoughts were running rampent and he absolutely despised them, you were popping into his mind with every shot. He didn't want to imagine what it would be like coming back from a mission without seeing you. He was regretting being an asshole before leaving and he was regretting not reassuring you all would be fine. He hated thinking that you were at home a worried mess about him. He was realizing you had reason to worry, reason to be an anxious mess before he left as shots flew around him.

He loved you, he knew it now. Now that a stray shot hit his chest, missing his vest and tearing through his skin. No, not now, not right now, not when he's realised this, not when he's worried about you, not when he knows you love him.

His hand shot to the wound, trying to stay up only to stumble to his knees. "Ghost! Ghost, stay up, stay awake!" Soap called out, Simon's hearing going in and out with each word. He'd experienced getting shot before, he'd experienced pain but the fear was new. Price and Soap hovered over him, the shooting having dimmed down and the room getting darker and darker with each with each breath. "It'll be okay Ghost, we're going to get you out of here." Price's tone sounded panicked, Ghost getting hurt wasn't something he had thought would happen.

Black seeped in from the corners of his vision and he let himself relax, the only thoughts in his mind being you as he grew tired and cold. At least if he was going to go, he was going to leave the world with his last thoughts being of you.

It was the call you had feared to receive from the moment you started dating him. It was the call no one ever wanted and the moment you heard, you were in your car and driving to the base. You had tried your best not to cry at all, trying to be strong as you walked through the sterile halls of the hospital. Seeing him in the hospital bed however, quickly changed that and tears brimmed your eyes.

"Doctors said he's going to pull through, he's just been resting a lot." Captain Price told you, his hand on your shoulder for comfort. "If I would have known this was going to go south like this, never would have done it. I'm sorry, Y/N." He added on and you looked at him, not allowing the tears to fall down. "It's okay. Simon's the strongest person I know, if anyone can pull through it's him and I'll help if I can... if he wants me too." You nodded, hugging yourself for comfort and glancing to Simon in the bed. "He wants you too, he wants you. He might not say it, but he does and he won't admit it, but he needs you." Price rubbed comforting circles in your shoulder as you nodded. "I'll give you two a moment." He finished and nodded reassuringly before leaving the room.

You took a deep breath, pulling a chair up to his bed and staring at him for a moment. The steady beeping of a heartrate monitor being the only thing you could hear aside from your shaky breaths. You were even hesitant to hold his hand, but Price's words weighed on your mind.

"He's right you know." His gruff voice surprised you, making dry up your tears. "Simon-" You grabbed his hand, watching as he turned his head to look at you with gritted teeth. He had heard the whole conversation, not wanting to startle you while you talked but he had a few things on his mind.

"I need to tell you something." He was looking at you, wanting to reach up and wipe the tears from your cheeks. "Simon, it can wait." You told him, nodding reassuringly while you stroked his hair. "No, it can't." He tried sitting up and you placed a hand on shoulder, shaking your head no but he was stubborn. "It really can't because it kept me distracted the whole mission." He added on and a wave of guilt tore through your body, did this happen because of you.

"I'm sorry." You said, tears flowing more and more as you broke down. "No, no this isn't your fault. I was an ass to you before leaving, not talking to you and acting like everything was okay." Simon was finding it hard to say especially now, facing you dead on. "Your worry annoyed me and I didn't know how to deal with it. I was going to end it when I got back but I realised how much I need you, how badly I need you. That your worry is good." You were quiet, appreciating the apology and waiting for what else he had to say. Knowing Simon, this wasn't easy.

"I love you. I didn't think we were at that stage yet or at least, I wasn't there. But I am, I am all in now. I like your worry, I need it. I need you there when I come back from a mission, to hold my hand in moments like this. I need you." He finished and your tears flowed even more freely. Your expression was unreadable to him, his hands coming up to hold your face as you cried.

"I love you too." You told him, letting out the shaky breath you didn't realise you were holding. He kissed your lips gently, much more gentle than you were used to and you melted against him. No longer crying from his words but from relief that he was actually okay.

"Considering you love my worry now." You started, wiping your face and smacking his arms harshly. "Getting that call was singehandedly the scariest thing I've ever been through! Don't ever scare me like that ever again." You cried, watching him chuckle before softly hugging you as his body was incapable of doing anything else.

"Yes ma'am."

A/N: I decided to leave the smut out as it didn't really fit the direction I decided to go in. I hope you enjoy it none the less!

[itsuki-minamy]

"K – LETTER STORY"

SILVER: "ANSWER"

Translation: Naru-kun Raws: Ridia

Yatogami Kuro was sitting in front of the tea table, worried.

It all started with a postcard he received yesterday from his brother, Mishakuji Yukari.

On the back of the table, placed on a tea table, was a photograph of the brothers posing as if they were blending into a picturesque foreign landscape (Kuro only knew it was a European street corner), as if it were a painting, and above you can see the elegant strokes of the fountain pen added to it.

The content is simple, with a few lines of recent information and a postscript.

For those who have been keeping up to date, there are anecdotes about where he stayed, how his roommate has grown, and his interactions with the other person who appears from time to time. His short, witty one-liners always remind him of Mishakuji's versatility.

(This is good.)

What bothers Kuro is the P.S., just a word.

He said,

"Thanks for your answer."

"......"

The address of the place where he will be staying is also written on the front of the postcard. Regardless of the moral argument for hanging his head, that nerve is very fraternity-like. But anyway,

(Should I respond as requested?)

His head bowed at that difficult question.

The battle of the past had finally been resolved, and the dispute should have been resolved... Not all of his bad feelings have dissipated... but at least he is no longer the subject of blatant denial... but he can't even say that his relationship is good enough to casually exchange letters.

(However, it is rude to leave it unattended and something is wrong here...)

He suddenly realized this and instinctively hit his knee.

(Yes, from here too!)

Like his brother, he wrote about people close to him. That's perfect for a return sword that doesn't add unnecessary emotions. He's sure everyone will be intrigued, even his brother.

(Let us begin.)

He grabbed a notepad and pen from the desk next to him and started writing a draft.

[Adolf K. Weismann, also known as the ''Silver King'' Isana Yashiro, whom I once considered his master and who now stands by my side as a friend, earned a strange nickname like ''German-Sensei'' in honor of assuming his position as professor.]

(Mmm, that's strange.)

Just by writing the minimum of information, and even a few notes, he filled a space the size of a postcard.

(Well, Shiro is a special man... if that's the case.)

He carefully tore off one note and wrote on the second.

[Neko transferred to Ashinaka High School with his real name, Ameno Miyabi, and causes commotion around her regardless of whether she uses supernatural powers or not. To clean up after that, Shiro and I ran out...]

(Hmm, what do you mean?)

He filled out another page.

(I guess Neko often acts like a cat...)

In that case, he would like to broaden the scope a little more and write about Kukuri Yukizome... no, his brother doesn't know about her, nor about Toru Hieda... a person who was involved with the "Green King".

"No, why?!"

Unbeknownst to him, a cry of agony escaped him.

The advice came slightly from behind.

"I think it's best to let go of unnecessary pretensions and just write as you want."

"It's not an unnecessary pretense. It's the way you should behave..."

After answering normally, Kuro turned around.

Before he knew it, Shiro had returned home and was stacking the books he took out of his bag on his desk. Likewise, Neko, still in her human form, was curled up in bed and yawning.

Kuro avoids unnecessary interactions with these two people he knows well (although he thought that, if he didn't take off Neko's uniform quickly, it would take him longer to iron it).

"I found out why I was trying to talk back to my brother."

Shiro let out a sigh.

"Well, I've been thinking about that since you got the postcard yesterday. When I got home, I found you moaning in front of your notebook, so I can understand why you're worried about the wording."

"Umm, squishy, ​​squishy, ​​squishy, ​​all over again. Nyahahahaha."

Riding a horse, Neko lay down and adopted a series of poses that seemed to imitate another person.

Shiro hesitantly told his friend, who accepted his misfortune with a bitter face, an inference that could be another blow.

"I was also thinking about this all day... that person named Mishakuji Yukari."

"What?"

"Maybe he added that word to mock Kuro, in anticipation that you would worry like that?"

Kuro was about to say "Gah!" and he sat upright.

Intuitively, he was sure that Shiro was right.

That's what his brother might be able to do.

A few days later.

Kuro eventually recovered and, feeling depressed and confused, wrote only a poem of his own in response.

[There is no communication between us, but we have a supportive relationship.]

[waywardstation]

Happy WIP Thursday!

I really wanted to get this fic out much sooner for PLA’s two year anniversary, but a lot of surprise things have popped up these last two weeks and made it pretty difficult to work on anything ^^; apologies!

So here is a WIP! It’s shorter, as I’m hoping to get this out soon.

Enjoy! Wording is subject to change.

————

“Thank you,” Ingo dunked his paste-covered rag into the bucket, wringing the soapy water out generously before going back to work on one last spot. A couple thorough scrapes, and the last of the cake seemed to finally be gone.

Ingo handed the rag back to Akari as she reached out to take it, having already placed the bucket back on the table. She set it aside as the warden took one last look around the room from atop the chair, a final scan. “There. While I wouldn’t be surprised if a Galaxy Team member somehow finds another spot somewhere tomorrow, that should be the last of it.”

“Ok, now get down,” Akari gestured to the floor with one hand as she held the chair with the other. “Don’t want you hurting your old man back.”

“I’m not that old,” Ingo played along with her teasing as he always did. But regardless, he began to step down from the chair with a soft grunt that did suggest some tightness, at the very least.

Normally, Akari would have pursued it with more of her usual teasing, like asking how old he really was then — he always came up with something funny when she asked that. But she knew he didn’t really remember his age. And yes, he always said it didn’t bother him in the grand scheme of things. But reminding him he didn’t have that right after they had finished celebrating her sixteenth birthday felt uncomfortable, especially considering he didn’t remember his own birth date either. So she left it there this time, watching him get down.

“Well, exploding cake and its messy aftermath aside, I’d say your party was quite a success; what an array of festivities we had tonight!” With his feet back on the ground, Ingo sang his praises as he set the chair back where it belonged against the wall. “I’m glad to see the sudden rain didn’t dampen the mood; it’s good the professor had opted for an indoor celebration! I do hope you had a good time and enjoyed yourself.”

[jean-dieu]

For the Romantic Questions!

Raphael: 2, 12, 21, 34

Does your OC remember their first crush? Would they ever admit to it now?

Ok second question about Raphaël's first crush and I want to explore a vague idea I had years ago about it.

Even without a celibacy vow, Raphaël is not the kind of man to think very much about love. As a teenager, he's not very interested in that kind of thing... And he's mostly terrible at recognizing his own feelings. I portray him being somewhat friend with a girl from his neighbourhood. They weren't best friends or anything, far from it, just casual friend, nothing more. But she always treated him right, even before they started to get to know each other, which is... Rare for him. He would start to develop feelings for her, but he knows he's nothing more than a positive acquaintance for her, with her having her own group of friends like a lot of teenagers. Raphaël would never confess to her, fearing a harsh rejection, and knowing they're in fact, not that close. Ultimately, she would starts dating someone else, and he'd just forget about it, thinking love isn't for him anyway.

He would admit it to himself, but telling others about it would be hard. He'd probably tell Sosiel at one point though as he gets more and more comfortable seeking help and reassurance about his complicated relation with love.

What was the worst advice your OC has ever received on the subject of love and relationships?

"If you like someone, just tell them! It's not that hard!" Raphaël's little sister, who means well but doesn't understand how her older brother functions

How does your OC feel about virginity? And their own in particular? Is it something to which they attach moral or spiritual weight? Or is it a meaningless social convention to them? Did (or would) their first lover know about their virginity?

Oh the most difficult question of the bunch. I have so many feelings about this but putting it into words is hard so please be patient with me. Also, TW this one is going to be a bit nsfw and darker than rest, talking about Raphaël's OCD and its impact on his sexuality, so feel free to skip that one.

Raphaël's view on his virginity is complicated.

As usual, Raphaël can't see himself as he sees others. He's not allowed to live the way they do. Not entitled to the same things. They are allowed to love, to have sex. He isn't. First of all, he's terrified of the idea of taking advantage of someone through sex, even abusing them. Raphaël has OCD, and has intrusive thoughts he struggles with, and whenever he thinks about sex, they come in. The problem is that he's in denial about it all, and while any normal person would just think "what a silly thoughts, I'd never do that" he can't help but think "this is exactly what's going to happen" and he has to prevent it by any mean necessary. And of course, he does blame it on his heritage, his blood, and it consolidates his thoughts that he's nothing more than a twisted mortal no better than a fiend. That's the first reason behind his chastity vow.

The second reason is also rooted in his status as a tiefling, as tieflings in general are often said to be thrilling lovers, and he wants to distance himself from any stereoypes as much as possible. Tieflings are thrilling lovers? No, not him! He's not like the other tieflings. He's a good little tiefling, as Woljif would put it.

Then comes Sosiel. He falls in love, and comes eventually their first time.

Breaking his celibacy vow was already hard, and he knew it was just a question of time before his chastity vow would be broken too. They both took it slow, but it still was very hard for Raphaël with how much healing he needed regarding his relation with his own sexuality.

Right after their first time, he broke down in tears, completely overwhelmed with the facts that 1. he actually did it 2. nothing bad happened 3. it was actually quite nice 4. he's allowed to love, to be loved, and to feel pleasure. It didn't startled Sosiel too much; at this point they've been dating for quite a few months, and he already knew the tiefling had a very complicated relationship with sexuality as a whole.

There's still a long way to go for him to heal completely, but he's definitely making progress. Sosiel has been more than helpful, and the cleric has been nothing but very understanding of his lover's issues, always being there for him when he needs to vent or to talk about it all. He's starting to enjoy having a sexual life, and is even starting to come to terms with being a bit ~kinky~ too.

Is it usual for others to develop a crush on your OC? Are they usually oblivious to this? If not then how do they manage such things?

No, Yes, They don't. Raphaël appears cold, distant, and stern beyond belief most of the time, so it's ... Hard to develop a real crush on him. But even if someone does, he'd be so oblivious to it. High wisdom + High perception? Fuck that, he doesn't get it until someone actually confesses to him. Thank GODS Sosiel did because they'd still be staring at each others from afar years post crusade.

I suppose as a Knight-Commander, he does get a bit more attention and he's doomed to have a few people having some kind of celebrity crush on him... Something he absolutely don't understand so his reaction to someone shouting "Raphaël I love you!!!" in a crowd would just be "what" and he would... walk away silently and awkwardly klzejzlksfjlkfq.

[indecisive-dizzy]

Hmm,,,,,,,,,, howdy/eddie angst cause they won’t leave my brain

I love them, I love them so much. So they need to suffer >:)

Howdy is a petty ex, I can’t see it any other way

I think they dated in high school, but Howdy’s internalized homophobia kinda definitely ruined things

I think howdy said some… not nice things to Eddie (that he totally doesn’t think about himself haha 😅) and that ended the relationship

Howdy still has feelings, but he still hasn’t fully accepted himself for being bisexual so he pushes them away

Eddie was a hot mess after their breakup, he felt like he failed their relationship even though he tried his best to make things work

What Howdy said stuck with him for years. It was the first time someone he loved told him such things to his face and it haunts him

When they’re adults, Eddie tries to be cordial but Howdy just avoids him and is very bitter either with him

Howdy will never admit it, but in their relationship he liked Eddie more when he was in drag because he could pretend his relationship was “normal”

Howdy is so internalized it hurts but it still didn’t excuse him treating his bf like trash 😔

For extra angst Eddie dates Latter later on and their relationship is actually really happy and healthy

That drives Howdy up the wall, there’s now way someone could like LATTER more than him (I love u latter this is Howdy’s thoughts not mine :,3)

Lizzy tries to be supportive of Howdy’s struggles, but there’s a reason she confided in Latter that she was a lesbian before Howdy :(

Rip Eddie Dear you would’ve loved Chappel Roan

He listens to Pink Pony Club and cries in drag

Casual and Good Luck, Babe give me their relationship vibes

Also Lizzy’s girlfriend is called Gabby and she’s very pretty :)

Random but I think they both stood up Daisey at least once lmao

They’re just hanging out with Daisey and something comes up so they have to go and accidentally end up ditching Daisey

They’re just sitting at the bus stop with one of their coats, smoking a cigarette as they’re waiting for the bus. If they had a nickel for the amount of times that’s happened, they’d have two nickels. Which isn’t a lot but it’s weird that it happened twice /ref

Either way I think they need to talk it out. And Howdy needs to smooch a man without being ashamed of it- *cough cough* Barnany- *cough cough*

My brain is full of them so this seems kinda random lmao

Have a good day/night pookie :D

The Grinch ass smile I smiled when I read "Howdy is a petty ex" lmaooo HE IS. This man in insufferable and I want to put him in a blender (affectionate)

Howdy projecting his internalized problems onto others sob. my brain came up with the idea that the things Howdy said he didn't say in a purposefully offensive way? like "well yeah duh everyone knows..." like Obviously this thing he hates abouts himself is common sense and everyone thinks this way??

idk I just don't think he started it trying to be offensive. but it was and turned into a full shouting match as Eddie got offended/hurt and emotional. Eddie left crying (sobbing)

cough Eddie pretends he either forgot Howdy all together or at least their relationship cough. blames his bad memory to be respectful and Not Have To Talk About It. Eddie with avoidance tendencies <3 my poor bbg

You're so right. Howdy already disliked Latter (gee wonder why) but now he's in a relationship with His EX. AND They're happy and healthy! Howdy's Gonna blow a fuseeee

Eddie Dear is just like me fr. I Listen to Pink Pony Club and cry. Not in drag, but that's a skill issue lol

Poor Daisey 😭😭🤣 also, reference spotted. I have way more than two nickels for everytime I've seen this ref. I could buy a yacht!

They dooo, but Howdy's bitterness and Eddie's avoidance of the subject make it Difficult. God it'd be so funny and if Frank (or Latter?) and Barnaby teamed up (unlikely duo my beloved) to Force them to talk.

Barnaby get that "If You Were Gay" song and kiss that worm akdhajdja I think it'd fix him 🤣

[ridiasfangirlings]

The clans hang out in an everybody lives au and the conversation gets to love interests. Some don't want to reveal the names of who they like and instead describes them. MikoRei's description of each other sounds like insults, SaruMi doesn't recognize their descriptions, KuroShiro has Shiro having fun with this, and IzuSeri is the only normal one and they weren't hiding the other person's name.

Someone’s gotta be the adults in this conversation okay XD Imagine Everybody Lives AU and maybe the cast are having like a meeting at Shiro’s dorm just to go over the state of things in the post-Slate world. As they’re talking Neko comes in, having just finished up her classes for the day, and she attaches herself to Shiro as she asks if they’re having ‘girl talk.’ Kukuri was telling her about this, that everyone sits in a big ring and discusses their love lives and other things. Shiro says this isn’t quite the same but he would be happy to discuss his love life, he has a beautiful wife who cooks him delicious meals every day. Neko is intrigued by the food part but curious about the ‘wife’ mention, Kuroh steps out of the kitchen and clears his throat as he menacingly states that he perhaps has interest in someone but that person should learn to be more conscious of the one making his food. Shiro laughs sheepishly like oops upset the wife, Kuroh sighs and says it’s difficult dealing with a useless husband, all while Neko looks between the two of them in confusion.

Munakata suggests they get back to the task at hand but Shiro thinks this is nice, isn’t it good to just discuss personal things and get to know each other better sometimes. He wonders if Munakata has anyone he’s interested in and Munakata states that the only person occupying his thoughts regularly is a certain troublesome barbarian. Mikoto thinks that’s an awfully nasty thing for Munakata to say but he gets it, he’s got a lot on his plate dealing with a stuffed shirt kind of guy who always gives lectures and can’t admit that he’s wrong.

Shiro decides maybe he should change the subject before they start fighting and destroy his dorm, he looks around for a rescue and his eyes rest on Yata. Yata of course gets all red at the mention of romance, coughing and looking nervous as he admits well there is someone, this really amazing guy but he’s kinda hard to deal with and always oblivious about these kinds of things so it’s hard to talk to him. Fushimi clicks his tongue and says of course an idiot like Misaki wouldn’t be able to handle anyone with more depth than a swimming pool and Yata’s like oh yeah well who do you like then. Fushimi snorts and says he doesn’t care about stupid things like romance, but if he did maybe there’s a sunshine idiot with a stupid smile out there that he could handle if that person ever stopped being a moron for one minute. Yata’s all surprised like wait so you do have a crush on someone who is it while Fushimi says that’s none of Yata’s business and doesn’t Yata have a crush on someone else too. Shiro also has to stop them before another fight can happen, even as he mutters under his breath ‘it’s—it’s really obvious for both of you, you know.’

Finally he turns to Awashima and Kusanagi, both of whom are drinking tea and waiting to get back to business talk. Shiro asks about who they like, surely Kusanagi is the type of person that gets a lot of attention. Kusanagi slowly looks up from his cup and then laughs a little as he admits that he and Awashima are already dating. Shiro’s actually caught off guard because hey someone said it right out, he tries to ask Awashima and she just calmly says ‘yes, we’re dating.’ There’s a long silence as everyone collectively realizes that mature adults are really something huh. 

[wavesoutbeingtossed]

it's me, hi! i'm the anon for last night, it's me!

i think i should use an emoji to identify myself

so, again you were very spot on! as you elaborated perfectly: unfortunately most of the time these partners don't even do this on purpose, it's usually a consequence of this habit of most men always thinking that the woman will solve everything, of being used to having their needs always be taken care of and are catered to. in simply being used to not thinking too much about this kind of thing. and this custom is only broken if the man has some form of will and motivation to try to change and really try to help his partner, whether in emotional or domestic issues, being willing to live as a team where one helps the other. but as you mentioned, most of the time that's not what happens

as for adulthood: exactly! everything is kind of a mess. and I also have a close friend who ended an engagement and was very embarrassed by the situation, in her case, the relationship was already full of problems, she said yes to the propouse but after a few month she realized it wasn't right. they had been dating for a few years, she had even moved to another country with him because of his work, it's a very long story lol.

but anyway, what I also find interesting is that all the situations you mentioned are so common, but when we are going through them we feel so alone. Some women are embarrassed to tell their friends about these problems while things are still being resolved with their partners, some only tell them many years later (I know cases of some women who were betrayed during the relationship, but decided to stay with their partners for a while, so they omitted this issue from some friends). like, we know that adult life is very chaotic and surely know someone (or will you eventually find out) that has been through the same thing as you, but when everything is going on it's normal to feel a little alone too.

lastly, taking advantage of your references to peter and ylm, I wanted to say that I really admire taylor for talking about this, I know it was expected, but sometimes I think it must be very difficult to deal with such a sensitive and vulnerable subject with thousands of people. sometimes I see some people commenting that they thought she made everything too blurry, but to be honest I think that's normal, I think the way she was able to share it all with us was the limit she could go at that moment and I already I think she's very brave. I think we in our late 20s or early 30s can pick up what she's putting down.

Hi anon! Welcome back!

“What I also find interesting is that all the situations you mentioned are so common, but when we are going through them we feel so alone” this is so, so, so true, and tbh I feel might be a big reason why Taylor decided to release TTPD the way she did and when she did, and I think being able to perform it on tour has been so gratifying and liberating.

I’ll tell you that in my friend’s case with the broken engagement, she was incredibly private about their problems — and this is someone I’ve been friends with nearly my entire life. My spidey senses picked up that something was going on with her after a particular day hanging out at their house, but when I gently pressed my friend chalked it up to pre-wedding jitters. So I gave her grace to speak about it how she wanted but just continued to support her as best I could. It wasn’t until the aforementioned bathroom floor breakdown that everything spilled out and I found out what was going on and how bad a place she was in. After it came out, I think it finally gave her strength to understand what she needed to do and do it, as painful and embarrassing and sad as it all felt at the time.

So I really do think Taylor writing and releasing music about it, more or less in real time, is her own way of doing that, and she’s said as much on tour about how cathartic and healing it is. It took a lot of guts to write the album, plan its release in the middle of a global tour and rejig an entire set list to fit it in and get that catharsis every night on stage. And I think about how many stories I’ve seen on here and other platforms in the last three months of people relating hard to the song and having their own Smallest Man or So Long London moment in their lives and I think that’s very much part of Taylor’s intention with the album. All at once the ink bleeds.

I love TTPD. Like, unabashedly and completely. I love how long The Anthology is and there are few, if any, skips on the album for me. And even if there were, I’d still respect Taylor’s right to release such a length album because a) she can and should do whatever the fuck she wants and b) I truly feel every one of those songs had to come out of her and each one says something about what she’s gone through and what she’s processed in the past year. I know people feel like the album needed more editing or whatever, maybe there’s an argument there from a commercial or production point of view, but like I said, I think every song relays an experience from her life, either literally or metaphorically, that she felt she wanted out in the world so people know and understand her.

This isn’t directed at you at all, but I can’t take any argument against her making the muses too “blurry” seriously whatsoever. IT’S HER WRITING AND SHE CAN DO WHATEVER SHE WANTS. She doesn’t owe anyone a verbatim telling of her life, and art takes on so many forms. No one would demand an explanation from any other artist over the inspiration for their work, and Taylor shouldn’t be expected to either. Maybe songs are about one person, maybe they’re about five, maybe they’re about no one and from her imagination, but regardless of the inspiration, it’s all her. Never let the truth get in the way of a good story, after all, lol. But in all seriousness, this is songwriting, and while we know Taylor writes from her own experiences, and we are lucky to be able to take those stories and use them to gain insight into her as a person, she is within her right to share as much or as little as she wants. All she does is release her music, and now it’s up to everyone else to take it forward. It’s incredibly brave and generous of her as an artist and I wish she got more credit for it, but ultimately she’s getting the last laugh.

Luckily, I feel like it’s pretty easy to pick up what she’s putting down, and I’m glad we have this art to reference when speaking about situations like these.

[bigbadripley]

Chapter 5 - DameLove

Marc Spector&Co. x Ex!F!OC, F!OC x Modern!Miguel O'Hara

Summery: Everything changed after Marc and Simone moved to New York. Being in a relationship with the Fist of Khonshu proved to be difficult enough without the added obstacles of normal relationships being forced into the mix. With seemingly irreconcilable differences overhead, fate’s plans continue to drive the pair back into each other’s lives, testing their patience, self-control, and new relationships. Is it truly written in the stars, or is it old habits taking over?

18+!! | Third-person omniscient | Dark elements | AU/AT |  Warnings: Language, OC with religious trauma, childhood trauma, sexual trauma. Effects of trauma in adulthood. Hella kissing, stalking (sorta), smut mention but no detail.

Words: 2.6K

A/N: I DID NOT ABANDON THIS I PROMISE. I had a lot going on this past month, but I will do two updates to make up for it. I update warnings with each chapter. Only proceed if you can handle the themes included in the warnings.

Minors DNI, DL;DR, if I miss a warning, please let me know.

Chapter List

"Buscando el momento preciso Tan cerca pero tan lejos Ya quiero rozar tu cuerpo Tu cara contra mi pecho El humo flotando denso" -"DameLove" by Girl Ultra

There was something about this man that made Simone want to crumble. In many ways, she felt she could trust him with anything and wanted to continue the pursuit of him and everything he had to offer. 

With that, given her past, came feelings of total terror at the idea of going past the first date. No matter how great Miguel might come off or how much he made her smile or laugh, she still had a gut feeling that it was too good to be true. 

That's where the test came in. Drop one extreme truth and tell him who he's signing up for. With Steven, she admitted she was once a dominatrix on their first date, and he took it much better than she expected. With Miguel, she waited until the second date. 

"I was a dominatrix to pay my way through university, you know." She spilled. They sat relatively close in a booth at an exclusive restaurant where Miguel undoubtedly got a table by waving his employment at P.I. around. It was an intimate space, and they knew they didn't have to sit next to each other, but that's how they ended up by the end of their meal. 

At the admission, Miguel was unphased. Not only was he sex-positive, but he believed that as long as people weren't hurting themselves or others, they should get their bag. He was quick to shrug this off. 

"Did that do something for you?" He asked. 

The question aimed to feel around without being too forward or flat-out asking a question too sexual in nature. Simone knew that but was already struggling enough to take things slower than usual. Instead of answering it plainly, she played coy.

"It paid well." She answered with an eyebrow wag before taking the subject in a different, less sexual, direction upon locking eyes with him. "Why don't you take those glasses off and let me see those peepers?" 

A tinge of panic struck Miguel at the request. He knew what his glasses were for, even if Simone wouldn't understand. 

His eyes were ultra-sensitive, for one, and the glasses helped with that, but the other reason for them was to make his irises appear brown. He invented them using a similar tech to red-eye correctors on cameras, as his eye color was an abnormal red from the incident that gave him spider DNA. 

"I'm blind as a bat without them and get these crazy headaches if I take them off." He explained, using the same excuse he gave everyone. Simone didn't question it for even a second.

"I'd hate for a migraine to ruin our evening." She replied before resting her hand on the crook of his elbow. It was a caring gesture that showed she meant what she said, and Miggy was captivated by her all over again. 

Simone wasn't thinking when she invited Miguel to walk her to her apartment. Inviting someone up after a date typically means a nightcap, a hookup, or both. While a hookup didn't sound bad at all, she was devoted to taking things slower to protect herself and avoid getting caught up in the same patterns.

Miguel had no idea what Simone had in mind, but he wanted to get at least a goodbye kiss if she allowed it. He had been watching her lips all night, struck by how soft they looked, and imagined how they must have tasted against his own. It was a wonder he didn't make a move in the restaurant. 

He stood behind her as she unlocked her door, the sound of keys rattling until a click signaled the door opening. He'd never seen her place before, but it looked well-decorated and cozy from the section he could see. His attention was pulled away from the inside of the apartment when Simone pivoted around to face him with a smile and a sparkle in her eye.

"I had fun, Miggy." 

God, she's so pretty. He thought.

"I did too. Same time next week?" He replied, subconsciously taking a step closer, closing the gap between them by a few inches.

Fuck, he's handsome. She thought. 

"I bet we can pull something off a bit sooner if you're game?" She suggested, not totally understanding what she meant by it, but would happily accept whatever he felt fit the bill. The space closed more, and she knew it was game over when his chest was snuggly to hers, and he looked down at her with dilated pupils. 

Their lips connected, and all breathing, sound, movement, and the Earth's rotation seemed to come to a complete stop. She felt her back push into the doorframe as Miguel's right hand held her face, and the left caressed her waist. She felt her body tingle and her heart drop into her stomach as she studied his lips and tongue. 

The intention to not sleep with him was gone as he relaxed his body into hers while she canvased her hands over his back and somehow felt him get closer.

She soon realized they were still in the hallway, halfway through the threshold of her door, where any neighbor could walk by and see them making out like kids outside their school lockers. It was enough to cause her to expel a small giggle between their lips.

"You can come inside if you want." She whispered breathily without noticing the innuendo at first but leaving it alone once she did. His eyes opened to her slightly, and his mouth continued to graze over her lips and chin lightly. 

"Oh yeah? I'd love to." He spoke softly with a slight drunken rasp, and Simone could have collapsed right there with how sexy it sounded. 

Miguel felt as ready as he'd ever been and queued up what he would do in his head, but before the pair could enter the apartment, he suddenly spotted a flash of white outside her window on the fire escape. 

Was that a leg? He thought, almost entirely sure it was, and his vision was rarely wrong. His ghostly kisses stopped, and he began to pull back from her, beaming at the pane. 

"We'd have to save this for another time, though. It's getting pretty late, and I gotta be up early in the morning." He explained. Simone was thoroughly thrown for a loop by this change of pace with wide eyes and a cocked head. 

What, is he supposed to turn into a pumpkin at midnight? She thought. 

"I'll call you." He spoke again before seeming to high-tail it down the hallway, turning the corner to get to the elevator. 

A thousand possibilities ran through Simone's head when she entered her apartment. It reminded her of when Marc and Steven refused to stay the night due to their blacking out, unbeknownst to her. 

Is he hiding something? She thought. No way, he seems so normal. 

These thoughts yelled at her, causing her to hit the panic button and call Jen immediately. 

"Hello?"

"Hey, Jen, got a minute?" 

"Yeah, of course." Jen responded, but a faint but deep "no" was weaved into it from her end. Simone knew the voice anywhere as Murdock's. 

"Wait, what's Matt doing there?" She asked, almost sure that the answer was that they were sleeping together again.

"We'll discuss that later. What's up?"

Simone took little time to explain what had just happened, and Jen was equally quick to ask questions.

"So, he just... left?" 

"Yep, a long, hot kiss, and then he dipped."

"Weird. It doesn't look good." 

"I'm going to be shitting bricks over it until he calls me or something, I swear." Simone sighed loudly. "Did he not like the kiss?"

"That's what it sounds like." Matt's voice chimed in again, followed by the sound of a thump that was undoubtedly him being punched in the shoulder, followed by a soft ouch. "Don't listen to him." 

"I mean, it sure felt like he liked it if you catch what I'm saying, but..." Simone trailed off mid-sentence as she spotted the flash of white in the corner of her eye from the window, just as Miggy had, but with a quick glimpse of blue and red. "What the fuck?" She muttered under her breath, paying little attention to Jen telling her not to panic over her date's dismissal. "I gotta go." She said before abruptly hanging up the call.

Simone rushed to the window and opened it, the sliding sound not interrupting what appeared to be a full-on fight between Mr. Knight and the S-Man on the fire escape above her. 

"What's going on here?" She yelled out to them. The pair froze and looked down at the woman's face, barely visible under the grate, but the voice was unmistakable to both of them. All she could make out was Mr. Knight's fist pulled back in a motion that appeared he was interrupted from clocking the other masked man in the face. 

"Uh, hey, Si-uh, Dr. Fredrick. Long time no see." Said Spidey, trying to avoid calling her by her first name and using the moment of distraction to climb over the railing. "Just found this guy stalking you and that guy you were with," He explained as he slowly lowered himself down to the platform outside her window on a web. 

On the other side, Simone heard the sound of steps on the metal stairs as Mr. Knight made his way back down. The relaxed walk gave away the man under the mask immediately.

"God dammit, Jake? Is that you?" She asked, knowing the answer.

"Yeah, yeah, doll. I wasn't stalkin', though." He replied matter-of-factly. His tone made her subconsciously ball her fist, irritated by the thought that he could have been in the background the entire night and, if not him, likely the person he had watching her before. 

"Go home. I'm sure there are more important people that need your help at the Mission." She managed to say calmly. 

"What about Spider-dweeb?" He asked, gesturing a gloved hand toward the man dangling upside down. 

"Dweeb?" The man in question asked, offended.

"Enough!" She objected before Jake could speak further. It came out as almost a shout and got both of them to give her their attention. She took a deep breath before she continued. "Just go, please." 

Jake couldn't deny that the tone she took hurt some part of him. That same part of him held out hope that she would come back to him. When he realized upon seeing her out and about that she was on a date, he nearly saw red. 

"Alright, hermosa. I'll see you around." He replied, stepping backward and turning when he reached the steps down. Spidey continued to sway back and forth from his web until he felt that the man in white was far enough away.

"I'm guessing that's the ex?" He asked, bringing up the topic from the gala. 

"What gave it away?" Simone asked sarcastically with a snicker. He observed her leaning forward on the window sill on her elbows, resting her chin in her palm. "So, I guess you missed me too much?" 

He was momentarily confused by the comment and remembered the last conversation she had with Spider-Man before responding. "I was in the area." He told her as he lowered himself more and dropped both feet onto the metal below. He realized he could get a sense of her feelings without tipping her off too much. "I hope your date went well, though." 

Simone felt a slight blush rise on her cheeks, thinking it was sweet of him to say but remembered that Miguel departed far too quickly. "It was great until he left, honestly." She shared with a shrug and then realized the person she was speaking with had shared a moment with her a couple weeks prior. "No offense." 

Though her sentence was playful, Miggy felt his heart stop as the last sentence registered in his mind, afraid she could see right through him. "Why would I be offended?" He asked, trying to not sound defensive or nervous. 

"Because you missed your chance. I actually like this one." She answered with a smile. 

Crisis averted. Miguel thought. 

"My loss, then. I'm happy for you, regardless." He offered before extending a thin web from his arm to the building next door. "Have a good night, Doc."

Simone gave him a polite nod, "You too, Spider-man." She replied before watching the suited man swing away like he was flying. She found herself leaning out of the window a bit more to view the ground below better, looking for the man in white and hoping he wasn't sticking around. Once she realized he wasn't in her view, she stepped back and shut the window again but was startled by the sound of her ringtone.

Under blue moon, I saw you So soon you'll take me

Simone let out a loud, dramatic sigh at the song, thinking to herself again that she needed to change it before the screen showed her that the caller was Jen, undoubtedly following up on the abrupt end to their conversation. 

It didn't take a shrink to know that the boys were unhappy with Moni's move back into the dating scene, but there was one that helped articulate the feelings better than they could on their own. 

Dr. Sterman, like Dr. Fredrick, specialized in superhuman mental cases. Due to Simone's inability to work with Marc professionally, given their relationship, he had to find someone else to fit the bill after Khonshu tried to take over the world. 

"It sounds to me like you're following her in hopes that she'll see it as enduring. Like she'll open her eyes and realize you care enough to keep an eye on her, and she'll take you back." The therapist with jet-black hair said. Marc had one leg resting over another, sitting comfortably in his armchair during this emergency session he called to his office. 

"She protected me when we were kids. Why wouldn't I return the favor now that I'm capable?" He asked, half-believing the words leaving his mouth. Though they rang true, Dr. Sterman's theory was closer to reality. Judging by the look on her very animated face, she wasn't buying it and didn't need to see his face under the mask to come to that conclusion.

"Right, and remind me why you sleep in a sarcophagus now?"

"Keeps me closer to the roots of the Egyptian God that I serve; why else?"

"It's crossed my mind that there's no way you slept in that while Simone was around. Could it be that the bed felt too big and empty once she was gone?" She offered, crossing her arms. She knew she was right, and Marc knew it too. 

"No sense in the queen bed when you sleep alone, that's all. Either way, it's in storage-" Marc started but was interrupted by Reese, a girl under his employ that was turned into a vampire against her will, entering with a cup of coffee in hand. She was just a kid with short, curly hair and dark skin, and given her newfound condition, she was perfect to have around to help during his waking hours. "For me?" He asked, referring to the joe. 

"Well, I can't drink it." She replied, handing the paper cup to him. 

With this, Dr. Sterman stood and smoothed out her pants. "I'll be going if we're finished here." She announced, watching curiously as Marc pulled the lower half of his mask about his mouth to sip the coffee. 

"We are. Have a good night, doctor." 

[alwaysmychoices]

How much do Charlie's parents know about her rocky start with Ethan? Did they had an opinion about him early on their relationship? What's their opinion "now"?

This is such a good question because I honestly haven't really thought about it, and this gives the whole fight new dimensions.

Charlie never told her parents about what happened in A Weekend with Dr. Ramsey. They know their daughter was going through a difficult period around that time, but they attributed it to her ethics trial and the loss of Mrs. Martinez. Her mother always wanted to pry into what happened that summer, but Charlie's dad kept her at bay saying that, when Charlie was ready, she would share. It just so happens that Charlie never intends to share that -- when things are good with Ethan, she doesn't want to ruin it, and when things are bad, she doesn't want to admit she should have known better.

But Charlie did eventually tell her parents she was seeing Ethan. It started slowly -- casually admitting she was seeing someone, mentioning Ethan more in conversation, and then letting it slip she was spending the weekend visiting Ethan's family. Technically, she never told them outright, but her parents knew. Normally, they would have been wary of their daughter dating her boss and former idol, but Ethan was the man who saved their daughter from the brink of death. Plus, they saw that their relationship was helping her process her trauma, and they weren't going to impede that. So, in the beginning, they were pleased to know Charlie had someone, and they liked that it was Ethan.

As time went on, they developed concerns -- why was it all such a secret? What were Ethan's intentions with their daughter? If they were together for the long-term, was he the right fit? Most importantly -- when was he going to officially meet them? They suspected that the relationship was serious and that it had been going on for a long time, so they were nervous their daughter hadn't even officially announced her relationship. Charlie's mom was desperate to get Ethan to visit them so she could decide if they were compatible, and Charlie's dad was equally eager to quell their nerves so he could feel satisfied his daughter was in a good place. When they asked, Charlie said everything was fine and changed the subject, but they wanted more.

Yet things were so delicate -- Charlie had almost died only a few months earlier, she'd almost lost her residency, and now there was a new owner changing everything about her hospital. They'd give it time, even if they were growing increasingly nervous by Charlie's restlessness and despondent voice on her more recent calls.

[merrock]

CHARACTER INFORMATION

face claim: Daniel Henney

full name: Spencer John Lawrence

nickname(s) / goes by: Spence, Spency, SJ

pronouns & gender: he/him/his and cis man 

sexuality: pansexual

birth date: April 2, 1978

birth place: Busan, South Korea 

arrival to merrock: 2017

housing: rural countryside

occupation: Owner and CEO of Merrock Law and part-time college professor at Merrock Community College teaching business and criminal law

work place: Merrock Law and Merrock Community College

family: Zoey Lawrence - younger sister, Bryan Lawrence - younger brother, one other younger sibling

relationship status: In a relationship with Alice Zhao

PERSONALITY

Spencer is a man of simple needs, someone who is easy-going, laid back, and the more chill person of the lawrence family. Only when he enters the court room can he be ruthless, shrewd, and aggressive, after all, he’s learned passion in a court room is more important than they let you know in school. The moment he steps out of the court room, or out of the classroom, does he become an easy going, enjoy life, something you wouldn’t expect of the ‘normal’ attorney persona. Spencer doesn’t live his life overly stressed out, attempting not to make his entire life his job, much like his parents he appreciates balance, makes a point to try new things, and attempt to not live his life to the extravagant which he knows he could depending on the legal job he currently works.

WRITTEN BY: Bri (she/her), est.

BACKGROUND / BIO

triggering / sensitive content: infertility tw, family member death tw

in 1978, spencer was born in busan, south korea to a single woman struggling to make ends meet. his biological father, for all that he knows, was british-american, passing through with his secondary school when he had started a relationship with the young woman. by the time he returned to school, it was too late to find out that his biological mother was expecting. being that she was barely sixteen when she gave birth to him and due to economic hardship, her parents disapproval, spencer was surrendered to a local orphanage. for two long years he was subjected to the life of a forgotten child living in the orphanage with no real name attached to him waiting for a family to come for him. henry and ellen lawrence were desperate to be parent, their greatest dreams were to take care of a child, but no matter how much trying nothing seemed to pan out for them. after long and difficult deliberation, they took the next step and started the long, complicated process of inter-country adoption. months and months were spent going through interviews, meeting with their attorney, going over home visits, and obtaining approval from the south korean government, the lawrences flew to busan, south korea and met their future son.

it was love at first sight for the parents, and from what he’s been told, it was love at first sight on his end too. the moment they settled their eyes on the little boy they knew that this was their son, and nothing would change that. when the adoption was complete he was taken home to ashford, connecticut where he would live out the good portion of his life. his adopted parents were strong middle class, they didn’t struggle, he was afforded most nice things he wanted, but wasn’t spoiled rotten and didn’t have so much disposable income that they didn’t have to work hard for things.

growing up being raised by two white parents in a predominately which neighborhood often garnered them looks in places like the local supermarket or mall, but his parents never shied away from how proud they were to have him as their son. this meant that from a young age he was made away that he was adopted, obviously that conversation had to take place given the obvious differences in looks, but what little they knew about his birth mother and birth father. his parents also were strong believers in letting their child and future children to understand as much of his culture as possible. they learned, studied, asked questions, and educated spencer as best as possible of where he came from without making him feel like it was being forced upon him. also making him aware that if he ever wanted to search out his birth parents they would help him every step of the way. only spencer felt complete with the family that was raising him, the honestly, the ability to still learn who he was and where he came from, never leaving him feel like he was missing out on something. truthfully, through an adoption support group, he realized he was one of the lucky ones to have the parents that he had.

henry and ellen would go on to adopt three other siblings from various places around the world, wanting nothing more than to have a happy and filled household of children, laughter, and love. the house was definitely filled when the fourth adopted child made the transition into the family, and spencer felt like he had everything he could have ever hoped for, a family. spencer grew up in a house full of love, something that he realizes that he wouldn’t have had if he had stayed in the orphanage in south korea. school was something that spencer wouldn’t say he excelled at but wouldn’t say he was bad at either. getting pretty good grades, being more successful in sports, meant being able to land himself a scholarship to connecticut college where he studied political science. spencer wasn’t originally sure what he planned to do with that until he took some required courses in political law and it seemed like so much clicked in his mind. that’s not to say it came easy but he studied hard, worked hard while on campus, and eventually took the lsat before being accepted to quinnipiac school of law. graduating in 2003, he took a solid year with passing the bar exam and finding the legal office that felt like it was the right fit. for the next thirteen years he worked hard, had a high percentage of cases one, and was expecting to be made partner at the law firm. when he was overlooked for someone who put in less time, less work, and didn’t have nearly the qualifications or experience, he decided to rely on his well-funded savings and left his job.

when his adopted maternal grandmother passed away he learned that she had left the house they had spent many a summers at in his name. the plan had been to travel to merrock, see the house, fix it up, and sell the house before returning to connecticut to settle in to the similar lifestyle area that his parents had raised him around. only once he returned and started fixing up the countryside house did spencer start finding the charm that merrock brought and why his grandmother had loved living in maine as much as she did. somehow his plan to sell the house turned into him finding a job, slowly renovating the place, and in the blink of an eye five years had gone by and has found himself becoming a true merrockite. presently, spencer teaches at the local community college teaching paralegal courses, and introductory business, criminal, and political law classes while figuring out if he’d like to take interviews with a near by law school to become a law professor or re-enter court room and get back into a private business and dust off his skills, but for now he’s enjoying passing along his passion to future community college students, even if they aren’t sure that’s what they want to do. Now having taken the next step he has moved into taking ownership of Merrock Law and stepped down to part-time at the local community college while exploring his growing relationship with Alice Zhao.

[septembersghost]

God I want the next person h dates to be as lowkey as possible. The fans are never going to stop. Which makes me wonder will they call every relationship he has as 'fake'? What if he has a baby? Would they have another 'babygate'? Would they still harass his gfs until they leave him? While I don't think they represents the fandom toxic ones are the most vocal. He is also such a Romantic who hates isolation. I really hope he finds the love of his life and live the life he wants to with her/him/them

i wish he could have a relationship like NH does, where it's just theirs and they manage to keep it off the map (we've seen photos of them together, we know, but it's still theirs). what makes it much more difficult with H is he's such a massive celebrity, and some of his fans are never going to be content to let him have that privacy, because they're convinced of something that isn't real, and they get angry when he defies that construct in their minds. we see it in TS' fandom - she's managed to carve out her life, love, and happiness in spite of them, but they're never going to stop being the way that they are. fans and critics in general demanding he label his sexuality is so wrong, as if being openly unlabeled isn't a valid choice in itself. what fans continue to do to LT and his son is horrifying, and it makes me sick to think of them doing that to H too. celebrating L's breakup with his longtime gf was terrible. and they subject H to the same behavior, if not sometimes worse (i'm convinced quite a bit of that fandom actually hates him?). they DON'T represent the whole of the fans at all, especially not a fanbase as vast as his is now, but they're so loud that they're unavoidable. people who are normal about him, and just like him/his music, aren't the ones raging and tearing him and his partners and others apart online, or concocting stuff about him and the former bandmate he hasn't seen in years. i hate knowing that this is something he has to immediately explain to anyone he even considers dating seriously, that even as much as he's rightfully pulled back from seeing anything online, he's still aware of that. and then especially having that Romantic/sensitive nature, which makes it even tougher to cope with and maneuver around all of that. tbh i wish him a private life where he finds happiness that we know next to nothing about, with someone he loves and who loves him for who he is just as much.

[bisluthq]

a few things

I don’t think it’s fair to say she didn’t communicate with joe. it’s very clear to me that they worked through whatever issues they had in 2021, but they kept coming up. ‘you say I don’t understand, and I say I know you don’t’ kind of implies she told him SOMETHING, and he failed to understand. this aligns with him being blindsided by the breakup, because he still didn’t expect her to end it.

I’ve heard the email thing from many different sources that have nothing in common with each other, and it makes sense timeline wise so at this point I believe it.

taylor def wasn’t seeing matty in april. did she flirt with him at his show in January? maybe, sure. timeline-wise, there’s no time when they were in the same place at the same time for long enough between january and the nashville shows in may for that to be the case. he was touring latam, southeast asia, and australia between march 18 and may 4. the tour dates are not spread out enough for travel back to the states to be plausible during this time. it just makes no sense for her to have left joe for matty when they weren’t in the same place at all geographically.

"it just makes no sense for her to have left joe for matty when they weren’t in the same place at all geographically" - so wait a second you believe she broke up with her actual live in partner of six and a half years VIA EMAIL (and no like the sources in different places have in my experience always tracked back to "friends of Pat's at NYU on the platform formerly known as Twitter" and I find that very weird lol as a source - if something that utterly bizarre - like genuinely unheard of in normal people society - had happened and it was that easy to prove then I'm willing to bet actual money that The Sun would've covered it and yet they... didn't... so clearly no person The Sun considers reliable has ever said it lol) but you don't believe she did it in large part because she was talking to someone else because the someone else in question was on tour???? Also we know for a fact that they recorded together for Midnights at some point and there was the thing about them spending Halloween together idk I've never suggested a steamy physical affair but obviously they were actively in touch because then they started saying "I love you" publicly lol? You think she needed to physically be with Matty to want to be with him but she broke up with, again, her LIVE IN PARTNER OF SIX AND A HALF YEARS remotely but yet she couldn't talk to Matty remotely?

Also I can for sure believe emails were exchanged in terms of division of stuff and logistics and shit because that's probably easier than trying to do all of that in person (especially since logistics in their case must've been hella difficult since he had stuff in like six geographically dispersed places he would've needed to collect or had sent to him) but obviously she didn't end it purely via email lol that would be literally unheard of. No one has ever done that lol unless perhaps it's an abusive situation and it's not safe to see the person/talk to them and this clearly wasn't like that??

re whether or not she communicated and especially how well like idk dude we weren't there and no one except the two of them would know how well they felt they were communicating. That's the other thing here like communication is subjective. Per the line you chose in the song, he apparently seemed to her not to entirely understand what he was doing wrong lol (he might've been gaslighting lmfao idk I don't live in his head and again neither does she) and for her trying over and over to sort shit out and make it work eventually just became too hard. Sad but like alack alas that's life sometimes (very often actually) shit just doesn't work out. Again, all I'm saying is there are multiple sides to a story. She obviously felt justified doing whatever it was she did but I'm sure he had his own version of what was going down.