#she said she likes math it's canon guys

[your-fave-is-a-math-major]

Eleven (Hopper) is a math major!

-minor: fashion

-specialization: geometry

-headcanon

[hiwelcometothemonstersancturary]

Poppy Playtime: True Ending (all toys saved, all secrets founds)

Synopsis: Angel saved all the toys inside PlayCo, and is now sitting outside waiting for the authorities to appear. What will happen now? Warnings: Canon-typical violence. Story is in 2nd person but Angel is their own character here. THIS HAS NOT BEEN PROOFREAD SO THERE WILL BE ERRORS. Have fun, byeee.

You are shaking.

Granted, this is the first time in the last two weeks that you aren't trembling due to fear of being killed or due to the cold, but anxiety. You're scared, still riding off adrenaline and without any idea of what could happen now, and you are certain that in any moment, you'll end up dropping unconscious on the floor. And yet, you don't. You cannot, really, considering your situation.

You take a deep breath, the smell of smoke filling your senses. Despite your best efforts, your hands are still dirty with dried blood.

Dogday lies against you, eyes turned towards the Sun. His white pupils seem to be sparkling in amazement; this is the first time in more than a decade that he has seen the Sun. Maybe two, who knows, you're too tired to do the math. You scratch his head, but he doesn't look away from the sky. The beautiful open sky. You had taken it for granted a few times in your life. Only a few. Never again. Never again...

Kissy is on your right side, anxiously holding your arm. Poppy is on your lap, still holding your Nokia phone and telling the kind 911 operator of your situation. You wonder how anxious she would be feeling if you were the one talking there... She was at the verge of tears before speaking up. "Understood, miss", she tells the second normal human she ever interacted with in the past decade. "Please warn them to be careful, we went through a lot and don't want to deal with even more".

You scratch her head. Huggy is next to your rundown car, on the other side of the parking lot, the mini critters and wuggies running around. Some of them grab the leaves and jump at the newfound texture. Others try digging in the dirt. One of them points at the car and ask each other how they can disassemble it. Catnap, standing right next to them, shakes his head. "This belongs to our Savior".

Baba is also sitting next to you. She watches over the mini nightmares debating over something you don't fully understand, as some of them climb over Catnap. He doesn't mind the act. Doey, on the other hand...

You stare at him. Little Simon is still sleeping on his arms, too anxious to join the others. Doey adjusts his own hat, his eyes going from corner to corner, especially towards where the little ones of Safe Haven are. Marie is taking good care of them, sitting on the concrete floor as they analyze flowers. Delight is next to her, tilting her head in curiosity as a centipede crawls over her hands, eyes sparkling. "This is fascinating!", she announces, happily stimming with her feet.

"... Doey?"

You reach your hand to him. He flinches before blinking, taken out of his trance. Upon noticing your worried stare, he forces a smile on his face: "I'm okay, Angel, no need to worry about me".

"And what about the other two?", you ask again, not letting go of him.

He's once again caught off-guard. You thought that by this point, the three kids would have gotten used to being equally acknowledged. Guess there's still work to be done, but we'll be alright. We have time, now. Just enough time.

"We're fine", Kevin grunts, looking away.

"Just tell me when it's too much, alright, kiddos? Don't want the sirens to scare you guys. They sound similar to the stuff back at PlayCo."

"I said we're fine", and there goes that familiar growl. "Shoosh, leave them".

"Matthew, let Kevin speak. It's okay for him to be upset".

"We can't scare the others"

"The others would like for all three of you to speak a bit", you reply, shaking your head. "Including Jack. Is he alright?"

"...", Doey shakes, before timidly nodding and fidgeting with his hands. "... I am".

You give him a smile. Dogday bumps his head against his shoulder, and Jack relaxes, his tense body softening. He repeats the gesture towards the critter, confirming that he'll be alright.

Pianosaurus and Yarnaby then bump their heads against your legs, both of them with plants hanging out from their mouths. Poppy jumps on your lap: "Thank you for the... Bouquet", you tell them, accepting the offering. Yarnaby purrs as a response, sitting on the ground. "Ollie, ya okay, kid?"

The baby long legs stares at you with that very, very energetic look of his, wrapped around a blanket and shaking in his lone seat next to yours. "It's fucking cold", he growls, grumpy as ever.

"Language!", Dogday warns him.

"We're not inside PlayCo. anymore, we can say whatever we want now, you dingus".

"Please don't have another argument before we arrive at the hospital", you ask the duo, sighing again. "... Want another blanket, Ollie?"

"I want a warm room away from this cold, that's what I want".

"Wait an hour or two, then".

"Urgh".

"You welcome".

You close your eyes, feeling the Sun against your skin. The Prototype's words echo in your head, the promise you two made still there:

These kids shall be safe and happy.

You can still hear the mechanical sounds his legs made when he walked. A part of you swears that it can feel him watching over your bunch from inside the factory, despite the cameras outside not being functional anymore. You don't doubt he would be capable of finding a way to watch the scene, though.

You stare at the burning parts of the factory in the background, and, before you can start doubting if this will grab the authorities' attention, you hear sirens in the background.

Cop sirens, to be exact.

Poppy looks up to you, Doey jumps on his seat, and you put the doll on Kissy's lap before jumping over Yarnaby:

"KIDS!", you call the others. "EVERYBODY, GET BACK THERE, THEY'RE COMING!"

Just one word:

FUCK.

Why did it have to be the COPS the first people to pop up, and not a fucking ambulance?! Fuckfuckfuckfuck. Just. Shit. FUCK (again). You are so, SO fucking lucky sometimes, urgh. Let's hope they don't scare the kids even more.

Huggy, Catnap, Marie and Doey help you retrieve the chaos gremlins back to the group. You count: All +100 of them are there, with no exceptions. You hold Doey's face and tell him to remain strong, you tell Kissy and Huggy that they have nothing to fear with you around, you assure Marie and Catnap don't make a murder plan, and you sit back on your seat.

The first car that appears makes your stomach curl. You stare at it, unmoving. The tension is palpable. The kids are anxious, terrified and horrified when the two cops get out of the car and turn to you.

You stare at them, suddenly more aware than ever that you have visible blood stains on your clothes and you must be looking like hell, and they stare at you in silence, approaching with their mean looks. Poppy moves on your seat, clinging to you even more, her call having just ended.

You stare at the cops again.

The cops stare at you again.

You bite your tongue. They aren't approaching you anymore, instead, stopping several meters away from your group, wide-eyed, and then you realize that they aren't reaching for their guns.

Finally, you roll your eyes:

"Do we have a problem here, officer?"

The guy you think is the oldest of the duo, a pale man with sunken brown eyes, seems taken completely off-guard for a moment. Bunzo clings to your leg, anxious. PJ Pug-a-Pillar tilts his head in curiosity, and you notice that Delight is waving at the duo.

"W...", the younger man's voice fails him. "What the-"

"Don't ya finish that sentence, there's kids there", you grunt, noticing the other cars appearing. "We need as many ambulances as possible, now. The kids needs medical attention".

"What happened there?", the officer demands, and his eyes go to the very much still burning piece of factory. You glance back at it for a moment before returning your attention to him.

"Executives", you shrug, aaaand more people pop out of the cars. "Tell your friends to back off, it's been a decade since these kids saw other people, and they bite".

"This is private property. What are you doing here?"

Private property, private property my fucking ass- "get your friends to back off, or else I won't say shit to you".

"You have no right-"

"Mister Officer, please, you must listen!"

You would have laughed at the guy's face upon seeing Poppy getting up from your seat. Catnap growls as a response to his voice tone, and you don't know if it's the sound he makes or his movements, but it seems convincing enough for the asshole to actually back off, and actually and properly inform the rest of the group to not approach.

"Thank you", Poppy mutters.

"Don't thank him", you scratch her head. "I am in private property because the owner of this frickin' place invited me in because he and these kids were stuck in there for the past decade. I need a dang ambulance for once".

"And who is the owner?"

You almost say Elliot Ludwig, but even your own tolerance for absurdity isn't high enough to buy that one. So you bite your tongue, you stay on your seat, and you hear more sirens echoing in the background.

"Long ass story", you mutter, before getting up, bag on one hand, Poppy in another.

You have no idea how or why, but the officer almost doesn't react when you approach him. His friend places a hand on his gun, but you don't react either, merely giving him the heavy bag.

"These are the documents", you tell him, watching the ambulances arrive.

"Did you steal these documents?"

"They were given to me", you half-lie, half-tell the truth.

"I'll have to ask you to follow me, ma'am, and tell me why there's a fire happening in an abandoned factory".

"W-wait, no!", Poppy desperately stares at you, wide-eyed. "T-they can't go, we need them!"

You merely unzip your jacket, exposing your very much still bleeding out shoulder and your very much still soaked in blood torso, and shrug.

You see people coming out of the ambulances. Bunzo runs to you, grabbing your leg as he stares at the officer, wide-eyed. "I-I won't let you take mama away!"

Well, there goes the cop's control of the situation, because now some of the minis also approach you, clinging to both your legs and back, and you know they look too realistic and move too naturally for them to be animatronics or robots. Other cops start moving to approach you, and you...

Yawn.

Damn, you're tired as hell-

A guy presents himself as the lieutenant, and another as the deputy chief. You tilt your head. Looks like your way of grabbing attention may have worked too well...

Marie's hand grabs your good shoulder. You don't react to her staring at the group, merely waiting for your permission to probably kill them or something worse. Despite what you wish you can do, you merely hold her hand. The deputy chief grabs the bag, and stares at the nurses who just got out of the ambulance before petting the shoulders of the first officer.

"Looks like we got big fish in our hands", he tells the guy. Uhm. Okay. "Go take these things to the ambulance. Let us handle the rest".

You blink, remembering what the Prototype told you about many people knowing about what PlayCo. was doing, but never doing anything about it. You stare at the man's eyes, and you aren't very good with judging people by looks but your stomach curls around itself, and you know one damn thing.

He stares at you with a certain disdain and hatred in his eyes. You smile. You hear a helicopter approaching, alongside a van from a news report. Your smile widens, a shit eating grin that goes from ear to ear as you realize who has the power over the situation.

"Looks like the mess you ignored finally caught up to you, eh, officer?"

You turn your back to the group, unafraid. "W-what's going on, Angel?", Dogday asks on his seat, terrified, as you put Poppy on his lap.

"Oh, a lot", you now grab your actual backpack, reaching for your water bottle as the kids stare at you, anxious. "A whole, whooole lot".

"What are they going to do?", Marie asks in a whisper. "Should we...?"

"Nope. We aren't killing anyone, pirralhada", you take a generous sip of water. "We just hit the jackpot".

You hear the number of people growing in the background. Good thing you told the kids to keep themselves quiet, and even better thing that they are listening.

"We're going to take whatever remains of PlayCo. down. And, most importantly, we'll make sure the people who didn't help you guys pay. But, right now?"

You turn towards the humans again.

"Right now, we gotta go to the hospital".

[gallaghersgal]

Smoke & Mirrors || Lip Gallagher

chapter one of BORDERLINE.

pairing: lip gallagher x fem!reader (nickname: MK)

warnings & tags: the start of a SLOWburn. idiots with tension. mature for mentions of violence, smoking, swearing, canon typical dialogue and whatnot. y'all've seen the show!

chapter summary: lip gallagher has been your best friend since before you could remember. he's the smartest person you know, so it astounds you how someone like him can be oh so stupid. you're committed to investing in his future, even if he isn't. you won't let your best friend end up stuck on the southside.

a/n: ummmm hi!! wrote basically this whole thing in the last 24hrs. it's unedited and tbh if i look at it for one more second im gonna explode!! enjoy <33

wc: 2.9k

The crisp October air sends a chill down your spine as you usher your younger sister Caroline out the door for school. She groans and rolls her eyes when you grab her by the handle of her backpack, pulling her back to adjust her scarf. At a mere thirteen years old she already carries the same attitude you did at sixteen. “Whatever you’re gonna say, I don’t wanna hear it. You were just sick, dad’ll have my head on a platter if I don’t make you bundle up.”

She stomps her foot, a stupid, childish action that has you mentally swearing to never have kids of your own. Helping raise this one was enough as it is. “It’s not even-” she starts, but you cut her off.

“I said I don’t wanna hear it. Wear your fucking scarf or I’m telling mom you make that tutor kid do your math homework.” You shove her head gently after securing the scarf around her neck and let her stomp down the stairs. “Don’t be a brat.”

She doesn’t answer, instead starting down the street towards the bus stop. Cigarette smoke wafts over the morning air from the Gallagher house. You turn to see Lip on the front stoop, blood shining on his brow as he smokes. You feel a twist in your gut. What did he get himself into this time, you think. The repetitive motion of locking the door comes like second nature and you spend the thirty odd seconds it takes worrying about the boy across the street.

When you turn towards the Gallagher house Caroline is already ahead of you, not waiting until she passes the chain-link fence to call out, “what happened to your face?”

You catch up in time to hear him scoff, “good morning to you too, Kit-Kat,” pulling out her childhood nickname, the one she still hates, that he gave to her when she was barely four. “‘S nothing. Battle scars an’ shit.”

“What the fuck kinda battle did’ya get yourself into?” you ask, leaning down to take his chin between your thumb and forefinger. The cut isn’t too bad, a lot of blood for a relatively small abrasion, but the skin around his eye is already blossoming a dark bruise. Lip stares at you as if to say ‘not in front of the kid,’ and you nod, fishing a five dollar bill out of your pocket. You were saving it for work, but Caroline’s silence is worth more. She raises an eyebrow, to which you snap, “just don’t tell mom, ‘kay? And don’t skip just ‘cause I'm skipping.”

Caroline turns to leave and you extend a hand to Lip, pulling him to stand. Eager fingers reach for his burnt-down cig when he goes to drop it, taking the final hit for yourself before stubbing it out on the sidewalk. “Greedy. Gotta buy y’own pack,” he remarks with a smirk. All it takes is a second to get back across the stress, and once you’re inside he unwraps the scarf from his neck. 

Your eyes catch on his bruised knuckles and you tilt your head to the side with a silent question, you gonna tell me what happened? He sighs, hearing you loud and clear despite not speaking a single word. “Got into it with Frank. He was givin’ Ian shit for no fuckin’ reason.”

“Mm,” you nod, and catch his hand after he runs it nervously through his curls. The bruises there aren’t as bad as the one on his eye, Frank must’ve only gotten one good, drunken swing in. No cuts either, which was good. For all his tough guy exterior, Lip Gallagher couldn’t stand the sting of peroxide. The less you need the better, you think, and a grin plays at your lips when you glance up at him, holding his injured hand up. “Think y’can roll a joint with these?”

His laugh is like music to your ears, revelling in the first grin you’ve seen from him this morning. “Yeah, yeah I can do that, y’wanna jus’ skip the whole day? We could catch a movie ‘r somethin’,” he suggests, following you upstairs to your room.

You shake your head, opening the door to your room for him. “Can't. Calc test in third period. Sit down, ‘m gonna get the first aid kit.” While you get the kit from the shelf in your closet you hear him open your desk drawer, pulling out the grinder and weed jar you keep hidden at the back.

“You got a shirt or somethin’ I could change into? This one smells like Frank’s fuckin’ booze,” Lip scoffs. He shrugs the tee over his head and lights another cigarette, his eyes following your every move with that same boyish twinkle you’d grown fond of over the years. It was always good to remember things weren’t getting to him, not too bad. 

You cast a glare in his direction, silently scolding him, ‘you know better, let me open the window,’ but he only grins in response. Pale morning light illuminates the room when you pull back your blackout curtains and crack the window. The city is still quiet–or, as quiet as it gets in Chicago–and the sounds of gentle wind and birdsong fall softly on your ears.

You settle at his side, first aid kit in one hand and a gray and black sweater of his in the other. Curious fingers reach for a small cut on his shoulder. “What’s this one from?” You trace the gash. It isn’t deep either, but it’ll need to be cleaned so it doesn’t get infected.

“It’s, uh, ’s nothin,” he brushes you off, to which you shoot him a glare. That sets him straight. In a low mumble he simply states, “beer bottle.”

Rage seethes inside you, your jaw tensing as you wet a cotton ball with peroxide. You keep any comments to yourself, not sure how LIp will react. You’re aware of his more than complicated familial relationships–you’d grown up with thim, seeing Frank’s drinking get worse, and the aftermath of Monica leaving–but if there was one constant with the Gallagher kids, it was family first, above everything. You had your opinions of Frank, and you knew Lip shared your distaste more than anything, but that didn’t take away the sensitive nature of the topic. So, you stay quiet, dabbing at the wound with a gentle hand. The sting draws a sharp hiss from him, and it’s then that you realize how flushed he is, his cheeks, neck and chest are a soft pink color. Graciously, you pretend not to notice, so as not to embarrass him further.

When the cut is cleaned and covered with a bandage Lip takes his sweater, pulling it over his head. It leaves his hair mussed and he smoothes a hand through his curls while you tilt his chin up, inspecting the cut on his brow. Blue eyes stare up at you with a vulnerability you’re not used to seeing from the boy you grew up with. At least you know he’s comfortable with you. That’s all.

Comfortable. Friendly. Nothing more. The same as it’s always been.

The way it’s meant to be.

“Quit starin’, get me fixed up so we can smoke this,” Lip grumbles, gesturing towards the rolling tray in his lap. You laugh at that, heart quickening in your chest. Tensions between the two of you had been thick as of late, but underneath it all things remained the same.

“Glad to know you’ve got your priorities straight,” you snort, cleaning up the second wound with peroxide. He takes it better this time, more prepared for the sting, but you still catch the way a few pained tears brim in his bright eyes. 

Soft, parted lips rest under your fingers as you clean the final abrasion. The bruising is the worst here, deep purple hues present across his mouth and down to his chin. He finishes rolling as you’re wiping at the blood that pooled below his lip, a deep red trail spilling down his chin. Your delicate motions are interrupted by Lip bringing the joint up to seal it, licking along the edge of the rolling paper. 

“‘M almost finished, be patient,” you murmur, focused on keeping the disinfectant out of his mouth. A moment later you pull back, swiping vaseline over the split before wiping the excess on his jeans. Payback for interrupting your tending to his wounds. “There. All patched up. Say ‘thank you nurse,’” you tease with a grin.

He’s already flicking the lighter on, holding the flame against the end of the joint to take the first hit for himself. You busy yourself with cleaning up the first aid supplies until he passes it off to you. Thick, earthy smelling smoke flows from his parted mouth, which lifts into a mischievous grin as he hands you the joint. “My lip’s busted up pretty fuckin’ bad. Think y’could kiss it better?”

Your cheeks flush with embarrassment at his blunt proposal. “Shut up,” you retort with a sharp laugh, before you can even consider it.

Lip throws on an exaggerated frown, “oh, c’mon MK. You know it’d be so fucking hot- ow!” He flinches, chest shaking with laughter as you throw your remote at him. “Okay! Okay, I know I know. You’re not one of my g-”

“Little ghetto girlfriends,” you tease, repeating the drunken dig an alibi patron had once thrown at Lip. 

“Exactly.”

You shake your head, laughing at him for a moment. “You’re never getting in my pants Gallagher. I’ve known you since we were three. It’s wrong,” you lie. Lip is your best friend, the same role he’s filled your entire life, side by side since the two of you were in diapers. But your rejection stems from something deeper than that.

Lip Gallagher is inconsistent. You can’t exactly call him unfaithful if he never truly commits to one girl, but he’s not one for relationships. He’s flighty. He runs from affection. More often than not he buries his true feelings under snark and insults, weed, booze, and–when all else fails–aggression. That doesn’t mean you didn’t love him, it doesn’t mean you had no feelings for him, it just gives you reason to brush off his advances. For now, it can remain a little game between the two of you.

Months ago, when these unwanted feelings began to blossom in your chest, you’d promised yourself you wouldn’t be just another girl he messed around with. You aren’t willing to let him mess this thing up for the both of you.

Eager to change the subject you move to your desk, pulling out an informational packet from MIT. Before you can get a word out Lip is shaking his head, casting a skeptical glare in your direction. “Hey, come on. I just want you to apply.” You lean to hand the packet over but he reaches for the joint instead, which you pull away quickly.

“No you come on, why would I apply to MIT, seriously,” he shoots back, refusing to take the folder from your hand. He settles more comfortably in your bed, laying back against the pillows and staring up at the ceiling instead of meeting your eyes. “Bunch ‘f ivy league reject pricks ridin’ on daddy’s money. You’re lucky I’m even applying to schools in town.” Greedy hands reach forward for the joint again and you yield with a sigh, passing it over. As an afterthought, you toss the packet to him as well.

“Just consider it, alright?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll think about it,” he says. You don’t need anything but the way he avoids your eyes to know it’s a lie. 

You purse your lips, throwing an icy stare his way. Lip Gallagher may be your best friend, but you’re not going to take any of his shit. “Have you even got any applications in?”

The question seems to take him by surprise, tendrils of smoke curling from the corner of his parted lips. “I’ve got a few,” another lie.

“Really? What schools,” you question, head tilted to the side with a knowing look. “Don’t lie to me, I know you better than anyone. I can tell.”

He laughs at that, shaking his head in disbelief. “Fine, you got me. I haven’t applied anywhere yet.” The end of the joint has a good stretch of ash, which he’s trying to keep precariously attached while he takes another hit. 

“Scoot,” you mumble, grabbing your own binder of college information packets. He stretches one arm back towards your desk to snag your heart shaped ashtray and knocks the ash off, then lays the tray in the space between your bodies. You settle in beside him, your knees propped comfortably over the throw pillow that always ended up in the middle of your bed. One hand takes the joint and the other opens your binder. 

Pages upon pages of information, campus maps, scholarship pamphlets, and your hand written tuition calculations make Lip go a little cross eyed as you flip towards a page with a yellow tab. “Okay. Here, look,” you point at the information you’d circled, reading Engineering B.S., training the Innovators of Tomorrow. “UI Urbana-Champaign. Great engineering program–” you flip the page over “–and scholarships for kids from underserved communities.”

You settle the joint between your lips, flipping through a few more pages. After a deep inhale you use it to gesture towards the page. “Or UChicago, that way you’d be close to home. They’ve got this thing called inner city promise. Smart kids, like you, from certain high schools with certain academic records and test scores can get full rides.” You run a finger down the short list, stopping at a familiar name and tapping it. “See? Lincoln Grove High School. You’d qualify, Lip.”

“‘M not some fuckin’ charity case,” he grumbles, snatching the burnt-down joint from your hand. “You’re a pain in my ass, y’know that?”

“Oh I’m a pain?” you snap, turning on your side to glare at him. “For what, believing in you? For not taking any of your self-deprecating, avoidant bullshit?”

He shrugs then, and the action is almost shy. He’s embarrassed. You have this innate ability to see him, the way no one else does. You scare yourself with it sometimes. “Just don’t know why you care so much,” he mumbles.

The sigh that leaves you is a deep, tired one. Convincing him of these things has always been difficult. For as smart as he is, Lip can be so infuriatingly stupid. “You’re smart, Lip. You’ve always been smart. I dunno what I would do if I went off to college and you stayed here. In this shithole.”

He doesn’t laugh the way you expect him to. He doesn’t brush it off. He just stares.

“We made a pact, did you forget?” you continue. He shakes his head silently, the far off look in his eyes letting you know he’s remembering that day. 

The day the two of you spent drinking by the pool. Making promises to each other. You’d said you would make it out, and you would do it together. You’d made Lip promise you that he’d give it a try, and stupidly you believed him. Or was it stupid? You’re not ready to give up yet. 

“I don’t want to do it without you,” you admit to him.

Lip looks at you, his blue eyes softening. “Do what without me?” You shake your head, scooting closer to rest your head on his shoulder. He stubs out the joint and wraps an arm around your shoulders. Friendly, comfortable affection. The kind you were used to. “C’mon MK, spit it out.”

“Any of it,” you return. “Don’t think I could get through another four years of school if you’re not doing it with me.”

“Yeah? What if we’re at different schools, dumbass,” he retorts, but his palm soothes across your arm, a contrast to his words. “You gonna follow me to MIT, since y’want me to go so bad?”

You can’t help the laugh that bubbles up in your chest, turning to look up at him with a grin playing at your lips. He got what he wanted. He made you laugh. “I’ll call you every night.”

“Every night huh?” he says with a smirk. “Cockblocking me from a thousand miles away is just like you, isn’t it.”

You shove him playfully, sitting up to move the ashtray off your bed. The MIT packet lays somewhere at the foot of the bed and you search through the pillows to find it. Instead of handing it to Lip, you just tuck it into his backpack, handing the bag to him after. “Well yeah, can’t have you getting distracted by the chess team girls,” you joke back. 

He lays there in your bed, looking up at you with that stupid grin of his. All bared teeth and mischief, the same one you’d seen all those years ago. You stay silent for a moment longer before you stand, holding out a hand to pull him up. 

“You sure we can’t just skip?”

“No, ‘ve got a test, remember? Gotta keep my grades up if ‘m gonna follow you all the way to MIT,” you say, and shakes his head with a laugh. Maybe he’s coming around to the idea. “Come on, I’ll drive us.”

thanks so much for reading!! series masterlist here.

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[s0uth3park]

Random SP headcanons pt2

Pt 1

Tweek tried to, but ultimately will never, learn how to drive with heavy advice from his loved ones (Craig). It’s too stressful. It’s dangerous because of his anxiety and tics for others and himself. No driving for Tweek. Please.

Cartman doesn’t make fun of Craig for being “half ginger” because he’s a little scared of him… kind of.

Speaking of, Cartman showed Craig his own wiener (as per TxC) of his own volition.

Fat fucking crush on Kyle btw.

If Stan hates that he looks like his dad then he hates that Kyle looks like his mom btw. Because… alcoholic x radical canadaphobe?? Fuck knows.

Stan shakes on weed (no projection here). He can’t feel it though.

Speaking of, Tweek can’t feel his own shaking.

Cartman wishes that Kenny would act how he would / seeks Kenny’s validation, hence his criticism of Kenny of the most menial of things (ie. holding a candle in Put It Down).

If there was money for it, Karen would own a lot of stuffed animals.

Kevin and Karen do not carry the gene for red hair. Or blond/blonde hair.

Cartman loves his fucking grandma. (No projection I swear)

Jimbo holds some affection for Liane but is just a gay old fuck. Jimned 4eva

Did I mention in my last post I think, despite Mrs Valmer’s canon design, that Mrs Tweak has the biggest tits? I’m saying it again if so

SHE AND RICHARD SCREW SO BAD I KNOW I SAID BUT PLEASE UNDERSTAND–

I know I said last post that I didn’t know how Tweek and Butters would be cousins but now I’ve decided… people can think differently because anything goes but for me it’s through both fathers. Tweak Bros. originates from Mrs. Tweak’s father and to earn the right to marry her he had to win him over and show his dedication to the profession

Richard and Stephen got grounded a LOT

Linda and Sheila’s hair always smells incredible (so much product)

Sheila is the type of grandma to give out stale sweeties

The Marsh name ends with Stanley. The bloodline ends with both him and Shelley

Heidi is the mother of Kyle’s kids (coping)

Cartman only became homeless after his mother died

He never worked ever (garageman future aside)

Clyde got vaccinated guys we can all rest now (the bad future self came back to tell him to never do it but once the good future is put into play he gets vaccinated because there was no bad future to come back to tell him)

Clyde is very girldad coded, soz

Bebe’s dad is a bit younger than her mom (he is the ultimate girldad… Mr. Stevens I wish I knew your name)

Clyde gets more insecure about his weight / appearance as he gets older. For now he is young however so let him live (his pudge is the pudge ever and he is sonboy if not a carnal dream and a half… latter only in pcov ofc)

Mr. Stevens helps Bebe with her homework a fuckton (particularly maths)

Butters bites his nails

Butters (after growing up) loves strong women. Look at his Pcov design and tell me he doesn’t want / have / respect a buff wife.

If Butters wasn’t grounded as much as a kid he wouldn’t have a fear of expectations as much as he does, meaning he would have probably gotten a better job than working in Dennybees or whatever it was called. Bro could have been a multi billionaire girlboss

I just want someone to hear this it’s not really a headcanon but BHLK Queen Thistle? LINDA STOTCH? Same character different nationalities istg

Kyle plays chaperone a fair bit to the guys

Kyle, Tolkien and Craig are the most sensible drivers out of All The Boys (Tolkien behind Craig and Kyle if I’m being honest)

Kenny and Bebe (Bebe isn’t a boy but YKWIM) are the fucking fastest / most reckless

Clyde and Stan are sort of not great but not bad drivers

Jimmy is rather close to Tolkien in terms of driving skill yk

Butters, Cartman, Tweek don’t drive – Cartman out of laziness / expectation of chaperones, and Butters and Tweek out of stress… Tweek tried to learn though

Craig in later years drives Tweek everywhere

Tweek and Cartman have experienced heart attacks (in later years) but for different reasons to the other. Clyde has come very close. So has Craig, though not as close.

Tweek dies before Craig.

Stan dies before Kyle.

Butters dies before Kenny (ironically).

Craig visits Tweek’s grave with flowers every week??

Craig, as an old man, wears a lot of fucking cardigans. Grandpa shirts too (the things without the collars).

Tweek and Craig have matching anythings. Typically slippers.

Bebe is very handsy and sometimes possessive. Clyde thinks it’s “sweet”. (The dudebro sweet not the romantic sweet through the possessiveness originates from romanticism).

In Pcov Clyde is a delivery man, actually

Out of all the couples, it would always be Clybe to cause the most hickeys

Bebe has a flatter ass than brilliant boobs (opposite for Wendy, though Wendy isn’t flat chested)

Nichole bleaches her skin in the future (it’s sad but look at her design. Out of everything else it’s the most unrecognisable and it’s awful) (ETA: when I say awful I’m talking about why most people bleach their skin and how it can affect one’s health – people can do as they please but ultimately skin bleaching isn’t a… great??? thing, socially and health-wise)

Nichole loves 60s/70s paraphernalia and fashion (the ultimate flower power child)

Wendy and Cartman fuck at least once in their lifetimes. They take it to the grave, but because of this Cartman doesn’t die a fucking virgin

That sounds so damn harsh wth but it’s true (I think Cartman doesn’t really have any labels moreso is just attached to certain people when it’s not just himself *cough cough* Kyle and Wendy *cough cough*)

Jimmy can see perfectly fine out of both eyes until he reaches teenhood

Jimmy has two brown haired alleles

Cartman doesn’t make fun of Kenny or Craig for having a ginger / red haired parent because he thinks they’re pretty cool. He lowkey ships them / wants to be them.

Cartman has the gene for ginger hair.

[real-fire-emblem-takes]

do you want to hear my three houses college major takes of course you do let’s do this king

Edelgard is a political science major. I’m doing these based on more of a modern au fyi but I think polisci fits the bill with her no matter what. I’ve seen arguments for criminal justice but I tend to lean towards polisci thinking about career paths

Hubert is in biomedical engineering. I was going to say bio at first but with how much he worked with agarthan technology I thought putting him in some kind of engineering program would be interesting

Ferdinand is a criminology major trying to get into law school. Three hopes confirms he went to the officers academy to study and build a case against his father

Dorothea is in mass communications. She’d minor in music but I don’t think she’d spend all that money for a degree in it. Communications I thought would work because it’s like media in relation to society. I could see her as a film major too but that’s a bit of a stretch

Bernadetta is a creative writing major I don’t think I need to argue that one

Petra is a geography major. I was going to say international relations but in this sort of non noble modern au I think geography fits her personal interests. I know she hates math but geography lets her study so much stuff at the same time and it’s very Petra to me

Linhardt is a biochem major again I don’t think I need to argue that one

Caspar I honestly can’t imagine doing a four year program and I could not find anything that actually fit him. I could see him doing a two year certificate program or some kind of trade school in something like welding

Dimitri depends on how much we remove from the scenario. Kill his family and you have pissed off criminal justice major Dimitri. Don’t kill his family and you have forestry major Dimitri (based on that one convo he has with Dedue in hopes I just really love this concept)

Dedue is a horticulture major. I don’t know if this is exactly what he would choose to do, but it’s what I think he’d be happiest doing it’s just very lovely for him. I could also see him as a nutrition major

Felix is a kinesiology major. I don’t think he’d pick a major instantly, but I think he’d really click with kinesiology once that reason budding talent kicks in

Sylvain is a film studies major and I will die on that hill. It’s a communications adjacent major, which is what he’s consistently good at and he loves art and I think a lower level of urgency would let him get into it a little more. I could also see him in journalism

Ingrid I actually don’t know. She and Ashe both really leaned into the knight thing (Ashe at least had a very easy alternative for me to go with). I can see her as some kind of engineering major (I just don’t know what field) because it’s a very respectable career path and because Ingrid just has major woman in stem vibes

Annette is an education/mathematics double major ENOUGH SAID.

Mercedes I initially wanted to say nursing, but I think social work or child development fit her a lot better based on her ambitions. I’m leaning towards child development

Ashe is a classics major. If you’re going to look at me and tell me this guy would not lose his mind if you let him study ancient literature and civilization you are WRONG.

Claude I could see double majoring in anthropology and polisci. I think he’d throw in some sort of chemistry minor just for fun

HILDA IS A FUCKING MARKETING MAJOR. Fashion marketing of the school offers it but oh my god this woman screams marketing major I mean that as lovingly as I can. I know some schools have specific jewelry/metalsmithing programs but it’s not common enough for me to jump at it

On that same line of loving slander Lorenz is more than just a business major. He’s an entrepreneurship major. I honestly think he’d be really good at it though

Marianne is in pre-vet but we already knew that. She’s canonically helped a horse through labor

Lysithea is definitely a stem major but I have no idea which one. I could see her doing something insane like astrophysics. Actually yea Lysithea would fucking love physics. Or neuroscience

Ignatz definitely started off as a business major, crashed out, switched to art history so he could still feel “sophisticated” before finally committing to art

Raphael is a hospitality major and I need you to hear me out on this okay PLEASE. Most of what he’s interested in requires a large amount of math which this man does not care for at all and would die doing. His family runs an inn during three hopes, so hospitality is a very reasonable degree for him. He’d only go to college to help his family more anyway let’s be real

Leonie I think would like geology. I was between that and forestry because I think Leonie would be really concerned with environmental waste in a modern au. I ultimately chose geology because I think she’d eventually get bored out of her mind in forestry

Yuri is a sociology major. I was tempted to also throw polisci at him, but sociology I thought focused more on the things that he really cares about plus I think he’d die in a political science classroom

Constance is a biology major. I was going to say chemistry at first but then I thought about bioluminescence and thought yea. She’d like that. She’d like that a lot. I don’t actually know much about the specifics of stem majors so please correct me if I’m botching course material

Hapi I think would be a botony major. I just think she’d really thrive on figuring out all the different ways you can fuck around with a plant. Hapi I love you but I genuinely don’t know what the fuck she’d do if she went to college. I don’t think she would even want to go to college or she’d go in like her thirties

Balthus. I’m actually gonna need help with that one.

Anyways have fun bye

.

[frxstbyt]

two-bit headcanons? :3

Two-bit Headcanons

Notes: Bro, this guy's underrated as hell. :( Time to write some hcs for him! :D

TW / CW !! : Mentions of death & drinking/alcoholism

— A really good dancer.

— Does very good voice impressions. (This is canon.)

— Close with his little sister Shannon. (She’s eight in my AU.)

Ms. Mathews works a lot, so Shannon usually hangs out at her friend’s house, but sometimes if they aren’t available, Two-Bit babysits her. He lets her paint his nails, do his hair, etc. He does all sorts of girly things, but he don’t give a shit ‘cause he loves his baby sister.

— Never really had a connection with a girl until he met Marcia.

From the very moment he saw her, it was just like an instant click. He couldn’t stop thinking about her after they parted and feels terrible for ripping up her number. He sees her again post-canon and apologizes for never calling and to make up for it, he takes her on a date and long story short, they start dating. (WHERE MY MAR-BIT SHIPPERS AT??)

— Misses his dad terribly.

Mr. Mathews wasn’t abusive, but he wasn’t the greatest dad to have. He did actually try to support his family and be there for them, but he and his wife always got into arguments and it really had a bad affect on Two-Bit. Yes, he and his dad did argue from time to time, but they were actually quite close. One night after an argument, Mr. Mathews was walking around town (which is something he always does when he and his wife get into a fight) to cool off and on his way back home, he got hit by a drunk driver while crossing the street and was killed on impact. Two-Bit never got over his death and sometimes when he’s drunk he’ll visit his dad’s grave and cry.

— Straight as an arrow, but very supportive of his friends.

He once threw hands with a Soc for calling out Darry. (It was a miracle he wasn’t arrested.)

— Dallas is his buddy.

These two are WILD when they’re together. Keep away from them at all costs.

— Made a bet that Soda and Steve were together with Dally and after they came out, Two marched right up to Dally, held out his hand and said, “They’re datin’, five bucks, pay up.”

Dallas was PISSED.

— He’s one of the only people who can get Darry to act his age.

They’re childhood best friends and sometimes Two’ll drag Darry outta the house and they hang out together for a couple’a hours.

— Had a pet goldfish. Keyword “had.”

Fishy had to go bye-bye via the toilet :(

— Kleptomaniac. (Also canon.)

— Math wizz. It’s his favorite class at school.

— Did gymnastics for like, three years and is insanely flexible.

— Double-jointed.

— St. Patrick’s Day is his favorite holiday aside from Christmas. (I headcanon him to be half Irish.)

— Allergic to peanuts. (As well as like, everything else. Poor guy has so many allergies.)

— Messy. Very messy. Never cleans up after himself.

End Notes: That’s all for today. Thanks for the ask, anon!

[jinxsleftmiddlefinger]

timebomb highschool au

(part 2)

(pt1) (pt3) (read on ao3)

description: timebomb highschool au pretty much sums it up lol. there’s also canon storylines (vander death, vi conflict etc.) but translated into a modern context

warnings: none

As it turns out, Ekko and the blue haired girl really did have math together. When he first met her in the office, Ekko hadn’t known what to think. Obviously, when he first walked in, he thought she was hot. She was wearing a cute black crop top, her stomach was toned like she worked out everyday, her hair was in a pretty braid, and her face matched in perfect harmony.

As for her personality, she was certainly…eccentric. Ekko wasn’t exactly opposed to it, but he has always been described as a more ‘chill’ and ‘laid back’ guy, so their vibes were on two different sides of the chart.

Like she said she would, Jinx led him to class and sat him down at the desk right beside hers, smiling brightly. Everyone around them seemed to be looking back at Ekko, wondering Who is he? and the looking at Jinx like Who’d you bring back?

“New kid.” He saw Jinx mouth at a girl with red hair. He shifted his gaze to see her waggle her eyebrows and mouth. “He’s kinda…” The red headed girl waved her hand towards her face, fanning herself like she was overheated.

Ekko looked down, blushing. He didn’t look over to see Jinx’s response to that comment on his supposed attractiveness.

The class was easy, even though he was arriving late in the year. He understood the worksheet quickly. Although Ekko wouldn’t call himself a nerd or even say that he particularly liked school, it had always come easy to him.

“You’re doing a nice job there,” Jinx nodded towards his sheet. 

He shifted his eyes over to her paper. She was also almost done, and she looked to be doing good. “So are you.”

“Meh,” She shrugged. “Not really my thing. I’m more of a gadgets and science gal, you know what I mean?”

For a second, Ekko was distracted by the sound of her voice. It had a raspy quality to it, but it was still sweet, and-

He stopped himself. You don’t even know her, stupid.

“Yeah, uh,” He stumbled over his words. “I’m into that stuff too.”

He looked back down at his sheet.

“One year for the robotics contest, I built this totally sick robot. Won first place. But I rigged it so that it would explode pink and blue glitter all over the judges just as they were awarding it…they’re still finding it all over the gym.” She giggles.

Ekko looks at the girl beside him. Maybe she is a little crazy.

“Did they disqualify you?”

She laughs harder. “Nah. They were too distracted by being covered in glitter to even think about that damn contest anymore.” She looks up at the wall, seeming lost in thought. “It was totally worth it.”

Jinx smirks at him when they both get yelled at for talking in class.

Even though she is not in his next class, Jinx takes him there anyway. She gives him a quick rundown of how the school works; who to avoid, who to make friends with.

“Oh, and.” She stops in front of the classroom 09. “If you ever need help with getting into some trouble or anything, let me know. I have…connections with the faculty, like I said before.” She smiles at him one more time before she’s lost in the crowd of the hallway.

Walking into classroom 09 alone, Ekko realizes that without Jinx there to guide him, he feels like a fish out of water in Zaun High. Everyone certainly looks at him like a fish that’s walking.

At lunch, Ekko doesn’t go to the cafeteria. For one, he’s not entirely sure where it is, and also, he has no one to sit with. So instead, he sits in the halls and messes around on his phone.

A boy sits down beside him, and he looks like he’s a year older than Ekko. A senior.

“You the new kid?” This boy doesn’t bother with introductions.

“Yeah.” Ekko crosses his arms over his body protectively.

“Hm.” The boy pauses. “I saw you hanging out with Jinx. I don’t know what she told you, but she’s bad news, ok? And honestly, there’s some boys here who would beat the shit out of you for getting to close to her.”

Ekko doesn’t know how to respond before the boy is gone, disappearing into the halls just like Jinx did.

He only spends a little time thinking about what he told him. It wasn’t anything he hadn’t already deduced himself.

It wasn’t like he was actively seeking out Jinx anyway. But, if he was to bump into her again, well…he wouldn’t try to deter her.

[widebrimmedhatsblog]

Pleaaaaaase give me and all of us ALL the lore I would love it 🥹

Yay!!! Let me try and go in order of events?

Actual essay below the cut

Lilith! So, in this universe, there is obviously no deal with Xaden to keep Vi "safe" in the rider's quadrant, but Lilith sends her anyway because she still thinks Vi will be safer in the quadrant than in the scribes, venin-wise. Because of this (in the quadrant with no Xaden) a few things happen! Vi's generally MORE aware of the venin adjacent issues, she's less confident with her lightning, and when it becomes clear to Lilith that Col. Aetos is after Violet, she knows she has to figure something new out.

The storm! The storm is Lilith's doing. @k2jk and I chatted about this briefly, and they summed it up pretty well in that Lilith starts the storm to try and delay Vi from reaching Athebyne entirely, but when that fails, she adapts and overcomes (if you will) and decides to use the storm to keep Vi in the cave with Xaden. Obviously, she doesn't have the deal in this universe, but she knows Xaden, at the very least, cares about the venin problem, as she suspects Vi will too. Also, Vi had THREE dragons, so she was fine, battle-wise. I think in canon Lilith is out of town (LOL) when war games happen, but in this specific universe where (again) Vi doesn't have X looking out for her, I think Lilith would be a lot more hands-on (in her very Lilith way). Also, Lilith clearly has a thing with like, storms at times other people would not want a storm. Seems her love language is just ruining people's day!

Xaddy! So Em and I (@maethologies) captured the Xaden lore in this as instead of being a child of divorce as he is in canon, he is instead a child of PLEASE get a divorce!! I don't know what the math is precisely, but canonically, Fen Riorson had to have been pretty young when he had Xaden, because Sgaeyl is AROUND fifty, I believe. This led me to conclude that his mom would be pretty young too? So there's that part of things, and then add in the fact that their marriage/betrothal/sex pact was contractual and not out of love, and that Fen HAD to be a pretty hard core guy in regards to his commitment to the revolution, and I think we have a nice recipe for some issues! Amy @skyfallscotland's original prompt was that either the Tyrrish Rebellion never happened, or it happened differently, and I decided to take the happened differently route of things. And when considering how things could have happened differently, my first thought for a variable we actually know about was Xaden's mom. So, I made her Poromish (which I think she is, I just think she's hiding in the Isles in canon). Basically, the idea there is that she left when he was ten, but she did come back, and she was pretty in and out of his life. She's not queen, because his parents aren't married (afaik) but she's...around? sometimes? But, her presence in Tyrrendor was able to get Poromiel to throw some extra troops/weapons/money/ whatever who knows at the Rebellion, which helped the Rebellion win. Another thing Em and I talk about that is relevant to this fic is that we both see Fen/unnamed woman who is Xaden's mom as a mirror of xaden/cat, or what xaden/cat would have become, sans Vi. To ME, this means they were pretty toxic, fought a lot in front of Xaden, general manipulation what have you. If we ever get Xaden's mother's first name I will probably succumb to my demons and write a full prequel fic, but that day is not today!

Xaddy part 2! I said this elsewhere, but Xaden's gryphon gift is basically his second signet! That's how he cheats at rock paper scissors (what a guy!!) and that's how he repeatedly reads her mind throughout the fic. Vi doesn't seem to know about gryphon fliers having mind work gifts in canon until X tells her, so I assumed she wouldn't know. Also, like, of course he bonds Sgaeyl eventually. Of course. Not to @ Amy twice in one post, but I think of it as VERY similar to Keep Quiet in that it's like, we know this guy. We know his destiny. We Know. So yes, he bonds Sgaeyl EVENTUALLY, but not on page. I have an idea, actually, but I don't want anyone else asking me to write a continuation of this AU, so I don't want to say it publicly just yet, LOL.

I think that 's it for now? If there's anything else lore-wise anyone else was wondering about, feel free to ask!!

[km-navia]

I used to hate stoic and smart Brick until I realize this interpretation of Brick was inspired by his Teenage self. 💀

I was going to call the 'stoic and smart' Brick as just Fanon Brick. (Because yeah, It is a fan interpretation of Brick) But then, I realize there are many interpretation of Brick as an adult and as a teen. So it is unfair to point out 1 interpretation of him and Catagorize it as "Fanon Brick". But him being stoic and smart seems to be popular. Although I've seen other, Interpretations from ppl who ship Blossick, where he is more fun and charismatic than he is smart and stoic. XD

But I've seen Bleedman, Sbj, And maybe leechedoodles also write him like this. Is it problem? NO. Honestly, This is just one of the many interpretation on how they think he would act like as a teenager.

But lets take a look on what might've inspired that by Rewatching Clipsville. In clipsville, Brick is pretty calm and mellowed out. Stoic even.

Like he does give off the stoic guy vibe. Like Bro no, Reaction to anything that was going on around him. Butch literally said "wow" and the only one who gave somewhat Reaction was Boomer who was wide eyed and looked over his shoulder, meanwhile, Brick was just indifferent. (And kept the same reaction).

The only time he see somewhat smile, is when he talking to Blossom.

(He looks fuck Boi 😭, I can't. I swear it's the smile made him look like one.)

He's face is giving "hey cutie, You're going to Todd tonight?".

(When they first saw this the only thing that went through my mind was, what did the boys go through to mellow out like this? 😂 especially Brick. But, Life happens and people change. Some ppl give up and have something better to do in life.)

I like how his face just looked normal when she said she needed to study algebra. But then He looked confused when she said it was for English class.

(I think if she just said she needed to study algebra for her math class. He would've understood or Maybe convince her to go to Todd's party)

In this scene, Blossom asked him what he is doing. And god, I love this face soo much!! He looks so awkward 😭 its giving, "damn, I don't know what to tell her." vibe Or "I'm just going to Todd's" vibe.

And ofc course, When He tells her he is going to Todd's. Blossom laughs and tells him what a coincidence. In which he has his iconic "I'm surrounded by idiots" face.

Honestly, I see where people got the whole stoic Brick interpretation. Majority of the time, The stoic stuff is when he is a teenager. Ofc, It's different from his canon self because his canon self is a literal 5 year old.

So we never know how Brick would turn out as a teenager. (Unless Craig Mccraken decide to show us). But clipsville Brick is the closest we will get to teen Brick. I guess.

However, I do understand some complains like making him super genuis. In some interpretations, Him being a "genuis" is fuel by his jealousy for Blossom and wanting to one.up her on something therefore he studies to get a better grade than her. But I personally can't see Brick as booksmart. I see him more street smart than Booksmart.

Although I would argue, That, While the Rowdyruff boys are all dumb and uneducated. Brick is probably the smartest member. Base on the comics and the show. It's small, But he is quite observant, Like how he corrected Butch when they got separated from their snails. And it was his plan that worked to get them back too. He also called out Blossom on cheating in the recent comic. And he knew Boomer was acting strange all day.

While Brick can't spell the word "was" or "dumb correctly, he does have noodle up there. Maybe I will make an entire analysis dedicated to Brick and his character. But rn, I am tired to do that. Anyway, Those were just my thoughts on stoic and smart Brick and what might have inspired his existence.

Overall, The biggest issue is that it's overused. Not that it isn't possible for him to mellow out and grow out his ways. Honestly, We'll never know unless Craig Mccraken tells us.

The only thing I found to be somewhat OOC is making him Booksmart. Sorry I can't see it XD. I see him more streetsmart. Someone who could read ppl easily, (since he has shown a lil bit of that in yhe show.) But that's just me.

[alexihollis]

Bad Math

*CW: Angst with a Happy Ending and Canon-Typical Violence*

Ajax hated running. Ajax hated running, so why was she once again sprinting down a subway platform? She pushed at Rembrandt's back, urging the smaller woman to go faster. Faster, faster, faster.

"Mercy, hurry the fuck up!" Ajax yelled when she looked over her shoulder to find Mercy lagging. The girl had legs, what the hell was she doing?

"I'm good!" Mercy yelled back and Ajax just shook her head, focusing on Rembrandt once more.

Thank God the door was open on the train. Rembrandt hopped inside, Ajax on her tail. When Ajax turned around though...

"Mercy!" Ajax screamed as she found Mercy several feet away, stopped and facing the oncoming gang.

Ajax still didn't recognize their colors. Hadn't recognized them when she noticed that they were being tailed from Gramercy. The Riffs would be pissed one they found out, but they were currently occupied. They were coming back from a meeting with Masai, Cleon choosing to hang around and have the Riffs drive her back down to Coney later. When Ajax noticed the first knife, she knew it would be too long before any of the Riffs' scouts got word out to their soldiers.

"I'll meet you back home!" Mercy yelled, flicking out her own switch knife. Fuck.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

"Mercy, no!" Rembrandt screamed.

Except it was already too late. One of the guys was already on Mercy and it slowly dawned on Ajax what Mercy had done. She had known the train doors weren't going to close in time, they were going to be stuck in a car with this psychos, so she-

"Mercy!" Rembrandt lunged, but Ajax grabbed her, wrapped her arms around Rembrandt's chest as Rembrandt struggled against her. "Let me go! Mercy!"

Two guys were now on Mercy and it wasn't good. And then there was a third. They weren't getting past her, but...Ajax felt sick to her stomach as she watched. At the very least, she could watch.

Ajax held tight until the door closed. Rembrandt's fists pounded at the glass as the train sped away.

"Not again," Rembrandt muttered as she turned her back to the door, sliding down to the floor of the train, hands fisting in her hair. "Not again, not again, not again."

"She'll be okay," Ajax forced herself to believe. "She's strong, she'll-"

"This is gonna kill Swan," Rembrandt said, her voice hollow sounding.

Ajax wanted to throw up.

--------

The apartment was silent. Not even the TV was on as they sat in the living room. Waiting. Cochise hated waiting.

It had been six hours since Ajax and Rembrandt got home and told them what happened. Six hours since they called the Riffs' headquarters trying to get a hold of Cleon. Six hours since Swan had last spoken, hanging up the phone and saying that Cleon's orders were to lay low in the apartment until Cleon either called back or came home.

The apartment was client, but now Ajax decided she wanted to pick a fight.

"Why the fuck aren't you mad at me?" Ajax asked, all but glaring at Swan from where Ajax and Rembrandt sat on the couch.

"Ajax, what are you-?" Rembrandt tried to say, but Ajax continued.

"You haven't said shit to me about this. Why?" Ajax demanded.

Swan didn't say anything. She sat in the arm chair and stared at the phone.

Ajax got off the couch, despite Rembrandt's best attempts to keep her seated, and stalked towards Swan. "Say something. I fucked up! Hit me! Tell me to go out and find her, you're number two, you can do that!"

"Cleon gave her orders," Cochise said.

"Fuck Cleon's orders, this is your girl, Swan!" Ajax yelled. "Why aren't you-?"

"I can't do this right now." Cochise hadn't heard Swan sound like that in years. Not since the earliest days of her slinking around the boardwalk like she thought they were still going to run her off despite the colors on her back. Swan stood up, shoulders hunched, and disappeared down the hallway, the quiet click of her bedroom door the only hint where she went.

"C'mon, Ajax, why'd you need to do that?" Cowgirl asked, tired. They were all tired.

Ajax shook her head. "No. No, she's supposed to be mad at me. Why isn't she mad at me?"

"Because she's worried about something else? Fucking Christ, Ajax, it isn't-"

"Cowgirl!" Cochise interrupted. Cowgirl's eyes snapped to her and Cochise shook her head.

Cowgirl's eyes widened just slightly, looked to Ajax for a second, and all the tension that was building immediately melted out of her.

But Ajax didn't want to back down. "What? What were you going to say?"

"I'm not fighting you either," Cowgirl said.

"I'm not- I- Motherfucker," Ajax muttered, hands on her head, fingers intertwined as she started to pace the room. "Motherfucker."

More time passed.

Then, Cleon came home. As soon as the key was in the lock, Swan was in the living room with the rest of them, waiting.

Cleon entered like the weight of the entire world pressed down on her. She stopped short, looking at them all.

For a moment, Cochise thought Cleon might actually make it through this. Then, Cochise saw the moment Cleon made eye-contact with Swan.

Cleon's mouth opened and her eyes welled and no words came out.

It didn't matter, though.

"No," Swan said. "No. No, no, no."

"I'm sorry," Cleon said. "We couldn't find her. We don't know who jumped them. Masai is still looking, but I wanted to let you know."

"Then we need to go out," Ajax said. "We need to help them."

Cleon shook her head, though. "I told Masai we would lie low. He thinks it was targeted."

At that, the most heartbreaking sob came from Swan. Swan's hands flew to her mouth, knuckles white as she pressed hard.

"Swan," Cleon went to move towards Swan.

Swan backed herself into a wall. Shaking her head. Then, she was flying back down the hall and the bedroom door slammed.

----------

Swan had not left her room for three days. Swan had not unlocked her bedroom door for three days. Cleon tried bribery. She made Swan's favorite meals and placed the plates right next to the door. She offered money. Alcohol. Anything. Cleon tried threats. The worst jobs for a month. Two months. Being on Cowgirl patrol for a year when they went out dancing. Swan refused to unlock the door.

Even worse? Ajax refused to pick the lock.

"You're the one who gave her the bedroom with the attached bathroom," Ajax said when Cleon tried. Then, when Cleon really pushed, "She deserves time alone. Give it to her."

The only thing keeping Cleon sane was that Rembrandt could sneak onto the fire escape outside of Swan's room and peek in, assuring Cleon that, yes, Swan was in fact alive in there.

Masai wasn't helping. "Are you sure those were the colors? Could it have been green and yellow?"

Cleon groaned into the phone. "They said green and purple vests. My girls aren't stupid, they know colors, and Rembrandt is one of the witnesses!"

"Got it. Got it, but- Cleon, no one's talking. And we're talking about Union Square. That's a lot of fucking people to not see shit."

Cleon hung up the phone and wanted to bash her head through the wall.

It was three-thirty in the morning, moving into the fourth day as Cleon sat alone in the kitchen, when she heard the door open. Cleon stopped breathing as she heard soft footsteps move down the hall and Swan appeared in the kitchen.

Swan did not seem surprised to see Cleon, but she didn't acknowledge Cleon either, moving to the pantry and pulling out a box of crackers. Then, she sat at the kitchen table.

Cleon didn't know what to say.

"Cochise," Swan said, staring at the table top.

Cleon blinked. "What?"

"Cochise would be a good second." Swan ate a cracker, like this was a completely casual conversation. "She's smart. Good with people. She stops Ajax from picking fights."

"I have a second," Cleon said, willing her voice to be calm. Stable.

"We both know I'm not surviving this one." Swan could have been saying it was about to rain. "I might make it another week or two. But Rembrandt told me what she saw. Ajax, too. This is it for me."

"You're just gonna give up? After all this time?" Cleon's throat felt tight and her eyes burned. "All this, and you're gonna roll over?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I am." Swan looked at Cleon, who hated how clear Swan's eyes looked. "I love you."

"Then, stay," Cleon's voice broke, but Swan was already shaking her head. "It's an order. You're staying, I don't give a fuck. I will have Ajax follow your ass until you are seventy-fucking-years old, you're surviving this."

One corner of Swan's mouth ticked up, just slightly. The smallest, saddest smile as she said, "Okay, Cleon."

"Fuck. Fuck," Cleon swiped at the tears that fell out of her eyes as she threw herself at Swan, holding tight. Swan hugged back, less tightly. "I love you, Swan, please. We love you."

It was like trying to hug a cloud.

------------

Two fucking weeks. It took Mercy two fucking weeks for the hospital to let her go. Not even for her injuries, a safety hold!

"We're concerned about your safety at home," they kept saying. Kept asking about a boyfriend or father, despite Mercy insisting that she did not, in fact, live with any men.

"I got jumped," Mercy kept saying, kept trying to explain, but no one believed her! No one!

It wasn't until all her wounds had healed and the safety hold expired that they finally let her walk out. When they asked for an address to send the bill, Mercy's eye twitched, but she got a perverse sense of glee writing her step-monster's address on the form. After all, the hospital was in the Bronx of all places, there was no way Cheryl would find her based on that (the question of why the fucking ambulance took her from Union Square to a hospital in the Bronx had not been answered, no matter how many times Mercy asked).

The worst of it? They wouldn't even let her use a fucking phone. So Mercy was left finding her own transportation all the way to Coney Island.

She made it into Manhattan when she realized she was being tailed.

Then, a car pulled up next to her and rolled down the window.

"Warrior!" Masai called out. "Mercy! Where the absolute fuck have you been?!"

Mercy blinked. The back door opened.

"Get in the goddamn car!" Masai yelled. "Fucking Warriors, do you even-? Jesus fucking Christ."

Masai...was usually not like this. Mercy got in the car, next to a silent Riff.

"Thanks?" Mercy said as the car sped off. "The hospital put me on a safety hold."

"Hospital? Which hospital? We checked all the hospitals!" Masai seemed ridiculously agitated for this situation.

"Montefiore?"

"I checked there," the Riff next to her said. "They said there wasn't anyone there matching your description. I went back multiple times."

"Huh."

"Never mind, that, we need to get you home, Cleon's losing her damn mind," Masai muttered, his hands gripping the wheel tight.

Which...Mercy wasn't exactly sure why Cleon would be freaking out that much, but she chose to keep her mouth shut on the drive home. They pulled up to the building and Mercy was surprised when Masai parked the car.

"I'm walking you to the door," he said.

"Okay," Mercy shrugged.

They made their way up the stairs. Masai's eyes on her back felt like a physical weight.

Mercy barely slid her key into the lock before the door was yanked open.

"Mercy?!" Rembrandt screamed.

"Oh, holy shit, okay," Mercy took a step back before being tackled by Rembrandt.

"Oh, my God. Oh, my God, you're alive?!" Rembrandt was very loud. And now pulling her into the apartment. "Swan! Swan!"

Ajax was suddenly there, as well, though she was by the front door, blocking Masai from what Mercy could tell. "Thanks, but no."

"Just wanted to make sure she got home. Have Cleon call me," Masai said, sounding much more his typical self.

"Will do. Bye." Then the door was closed.

"Swan!" Rembrandt yelled again as she was pushing Mercy down on to the couch. Then, to Mercy, "Do you need anything? Water? Food? Where the fuck have you been?!"

"I-" Mercy tried.

Then, Cleon was there, looking tired and stressed. "Mercy?!"

"Hi-"

"Where the fuck have you been?!" Cleon yelled and, okay, now she was hugging Mercy, too. "Are you hurt? What the fuck? We are having a very long conversation about subway stations and fights! Where have you been?"

"The hospital!" Mercy finally managed to say over the cacophony of Cleon and Cochise and Cowgirl, Rembrandt was muttering something about food. "I was at the hospital! Someone called an ambulance and they took me up to the Bronx. I'm fine, but they put me on a safety hold." Then, after a moment, "I think the Riffs may have accidentally caused the safety hold."

Mercy could see the financial side of Cleon's brain click in. "Oh. Um. Two weeks in the hospital?"

"I sent the bill to Cheryl," Mercy said and Cleon all but deflated with relief and a muttered, "Thank fucking God."

Rembrandt was shoving a glass of water in Mercy's hands. "Drink."

"Rem, I'm fine-"

"Mercy?"

The glass of water was no longer in Mercy's hands, she thought Rembrandt might have grabbed it as Mercy shot to her feet.

Swan looked horrible, which was a new experience for Mercy because she thought Swan looked beautiful even during the Night from Hell. And Swan still looked beautiful, of course she did, but right now she also looked miserable. Dark bags under her eyes and hair barely braided back.

What really broke Mercy's heart was the hoodie Swan wore. Mercy's hoodie, the oversized one that Mercy bought with her first real paycheck from Jenkins' bar.

Mercy didn't notice her feet moving towards Swan, focused only on Swan. "Baby. Baby, I'm so sorry."

Tears welled in Swan's eyes and Mercy rocked back as she had her arms full of sobbing Swan. Mercy held tight as Swan melted, then and there, in a way Mercy had never seen her do before, not in front of the other Warriors.

"I'm here," Mercy promised, pressing soft kisses to the top of Swan's head. "I'm here. It's okay. I'm here."

She managed to get Swan back into their room, back into the unmade bed. Swan curled herself tight against Mercy.

Cleon appeared in the doorway after Swan cried herself to sleep, still clutching tight to Mercy.

"She sleeping?" Cleon asked.

Mercy nodded. Looked down at Swan and brushed at the tear tracks drying on her cheeks. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to worry everyone."

"Not your fault," Cleon sighed, heavily. "Just- I don't fucking know. It's bad math with you two."

And Mercy wasn't sure what that meant, but Cleon left before she could ask.

Ajax swung by later, took a seat at the small desk, rocking the chair back and forth on its back legs because Ajax didn't know how to sit still. Gave Mercy a quiet, but large amount of shit for the stunt she pulled at the station.

"She didn't even yell at me," Ajax said, gesturing to sleeping Swan. "When we got back without you. Didn't say shit."

"You guys find the gang thats responsible for it?" Mercy asked.

Ajax shook her head. "Masai thinks it might be some new guys trying to come up." She shifted on her feet, her arms crossed, uncomfortable. "I think Cleon thinks it's the Rogues trying to make some sort of comeback. That that might be why we got targeted like that."

"Awesome," Mercy muttered darkly. Then, "Cleon's mad at me, isn't she?"

"Cleon's mad at Cleon," Ajax corrected. "Swan's special to her, always has been."

Which had been a terrifying realization for Mercy that first day as a Warrior, realizing that she was dating her new leader's adopted little sister, not just her number two.

"Cleon always says Rem and me are bad math," Ajax continued. "That if she loses one of us, the other's not gonna last long. She can handle that with us, we've always been like that, but Swan? This scared the shit out of her, because, as much as Cleon might not want to admit it, Cleon would lose her shit if she lost Swan. More than if she lost the rest of us."

"Oh," Mercy said. Because what else was there to say?

That she wouldn't stay back? That she wouldn't fight for her crew? They thought they killed her, Mercy was sure of it, and they freaked when the ambulance's sirens came screaming. If they were stuck on a train car with only Mercy, Rembrandt and Ajax?

No.

Mercy would have made the same decision.

So there was nothing else to say. And there was nothing else to do except hold Swan tight and be glad she survived that night after all.

--------------

all complaints can be forwarded to the glorious @wutheringhestia who gave me the amazing prompt that sparked this!!!! thank you so much

[texanmarcusdavenport]

Davenport-Dooley School Headcanons

Leo

Very smart but struggles a bit in all of his classes because of ADHD

That being said, he's especially good at math and science. I mean he & Bree are in the same physics class when she's at least a grade ahead of him, so this is semi-canon? Also Leo is shown to be good with tech from the very beginning.

His worst class is history, he thinks it's boring & awful

Pretty good at art! He wanted to be a comic artist when he was younger.

He gets his STEM-mindedness from his dad, Tasha was def an English girl

Adam

Does poorly in most of his classes due to a mix of not really caring about school and several learning disorders that no one has ever bothered to accommodate.

That being said, he manages to skate by simply due to his good memory.

He actually did okay in homeschool (or wtv form of education Donald gave them considering they can read & do at least basic math).

He was raised in a lab by Donald Davenport & Chase Davenport is his brother, so he is oddly knowledgable in some areas.

Home ec. & English are his favorite classes but he doesn't like others to know that he genuinely cares about these classes due to insecurity about his intelligence.

He has an interest in creative writing that he doesn't share with anyone.

He likes trying new things so every year/semester he'll pick up a different extracurricular. Cheerleading, theater, culinary club, etc.

Bree

Gets good grades, solid B+ average but she doesn't like to talk about it bc she'll just be compared to Chase. Like Leo she struggles at times because of her ADHD.

Pretty neutral about classwork itself, her favorite classes are art & English because they're easy.

Good at art, especially painting, I like to think she goes into fashion design or something similar. She & Leo are definitely the art kids of the family.

She'll sometimes try out extracurriculars with Adam, personally I think Bree would benefit from a sport because it could help with her confidence & she clearly has some anger issues she needs to work out.

Chase

This mfing overachiever 😭

Straight As, has a panic attack when he gets an A-, would be in every available extracurricular if it weren't for missions

He's more of a gymnast/martial artist than a sports guy, he thinks jocks are awful

Math classes are his favorites, he hates the subjectivity of English

Annoyingly good at art, "I'm no Picasso 🤭" then proceeds to show you a masterpiece. That being said he doesn't really care for art, he mostly uses his skill for drafting & design.

Marcus

Maintained a careful B+ average (statistically most "normal" GPA)

His favorite classes are English & Theater because he loves lying, his least favorites are math classes because they're boring

Complicated relationship with art, he likes it but struggles with being genuinely creative. I like to think he goes into architecture since it's a good blend of creativity & structure.

Daniel

I feel like Daniel is similar to Leo, struggles in all his classes but is a mathematical genius.

Probably a mechanical genius as well, he gives the vibe of those kids who build like pipe bombs out of nothing. He is meant to have superintelligence after all (or "copy" it but I don't really believe that is possible, intelligence is literally built into your brain).

[girlscoutbrownies]

sbg headcanons!

(i had to put a title because it keeps just showing up as “aiden” in my notifs)

some of my favourite school bus graveyard headcanons! (in celebration of 101 followers) some are mine, some belong to other people that i’ve taken as well

these got really, really long so ill split it into two parts: aiden, tyler, and taylor for this post and ashlyn, ben, and logan will be in the next

——

aiden

(bit of a tw for disassociation around the end)

- uses he/any pronouns, he mostly doesn’t give a fuck. also doesn’t care if you stick to he/him because he likes it. he also tries out mirror pronouns every once in a while and flipflops between any

- unlabelled energy. also doesn’t care abt that type of stuff, but he’s asexual and it takes him a while to grow feelings. he’s afraid of letting people close to him but it really doesn’t matter to him, not that much. he’s pretty apathetic about it

- generally smells like shittily applied cedarwood cologne. it’s one of those cheap drugstore brands and sometimes he forgets to apply it in the morning, and he doesn’t spray it very well. also smells like grass sometimes

- his favourite subject is psychology/maths/anything logic based (he likes those puzzles). growing up with his bitchass karen mom who probably twisted all the words he said, he doesn’t like cryptic or vague language or poetry (english class) because it reminds him of her. in math, there’s only one answer. in english, there’s hundreds. also the words swim on the paper and he finds it hard to focus

- he has his ears pierced. he begged his parents to take him to an ear piercing studio they just ended up taking him to claire’s but he was still so happy about it

- he BEGGED for a dog or a pet when he was very little but eventually stopped at some point. he asked for stuffed animals and never got any because “it would be too hard to keep track of when we’re moving and you would lose them and get sad” and he’s still very upset about it. used to hug like three pillows when he slept

- he was told they were settling down in georgia and now his current room has millions of stuffed animals i will not hear any arguments about this

- he’s a kicker in his sleep (when he gets any). he kicks plushies off his bed like all the time, he’s not apologetic though he’s just like “oh shit”

- worst and best guy to have a sleepover with. super clingy

- he knows very few actual life skills other than operating a microwave for frozen meals because he largely grew up alone without his parental figures in his life. ashlyn and tyler eventually teach him how to cook

- his growth is stunted bc of that period in his life and he’s short like ashlyn

- he is a HORRIBLE gossip addict. they’ll be sitting at the lunch table eating in silence and he drops “did you hear that samantha’s parents are divorced and madison dropped her bc samantha’s mom doesn’t drive them to the mall anymore” like HUH WHERE DID YOU HEAR THIS?

- he gets school lunch and very rarely (if ever) brings lunch from home. sometimes ben makes him lunches

- plays with his food (this is canon) but he makes storylines out of whatever he does its like his personal roman empire

- big fan of extreme foods (spicy, sour, etc) ((he grew up eating plain ramen)) and loves weird food combinations. everyone always makes weird faces at him when theyre at the mall and he orders weird shit

- he doesn’t know proper meal etiquette until someone has to tell him, his parents didn’t teach him anything (I HATE THEM)

- he’s a really bad cook like ben because he always ends up getting distracted, and somehow manages to skip over steps in the recipes.

- he probably likes cooking shows though and is like “yeah i could do that” (he can’t do that)

- the first time someone (tyler) made aiden a homecooked meal he started cry laughing (it was mostly crying) (nobody talks about it)

- the few times his mom has made him meals whenever she’s home they’re really bad. they don’t taste anything like home, but he didn’t know what home tasted like so he just cried. his mom thought it was because of how good it was (it wasn’t) and he just cried harder

- he dislikes bitter flavours, especially like, orange juice that you make from scratch but you don’t put any sugar in it (it’s because his mom once tried to make homemade orange juice/lemonade to feel more like a “real mom” and it was horrible

- he’ll still eat bitter food though he just wouldn’t like it that much

- likes crunchy food or food that pops in your mouth (poprocks) bc he thinks its cool

- probably needs glasses from how long he’s spent staring at screens (his backstory)

- the one thing his parents consistently did as a kid was take him to his doctors appointments so he has stellar teeth

- he’s fit and fairly athletic (jumping off walls and all) but he doesn’t play sports because he just. isn’t interested in any of it. he tries everything but nothing really sticks that much

- he eats his greens but probably wouldn’t care much for the healthy vegan lifestyle, not that much of a picky eater (this part is canon)

- his favourite holiday is halloween because 1. candy (which he didn’t get much as a kid unless he specifically asked for it or ben brought it over) and 2. he loves dressing up it’s so fun to him

- understimulation is the BANE of his existence he genuinely wants to tear out his own hair every time he gets like that. gets really irritated

- he disassociates a lot, generally experiences a lot of derealization. he doesn’t feel like he’s in his own body sometimes

- insomniac

- chases thrills so that he can “feel” something. doesn’t care if it hurts him or not, because at least then he’ll remember he’s a real person and that his life matters

- really bad at telling when people are lying/are irritated with him. he just keeps pushing until they explode

- good with secrets (his own) but isn’t good at deflecting if asked about someone else’s. he’s just like “ummm. would u look over there. a bird!”

- runs really fast, he wakes up early in the morning to take a walk around the neighborhood. he sometimes encounters tyler if he happens to go into his city (which is often, because he doesn’t like being in his house)

- his house is always really cold, which is why he tends to run really warm (his body is compensating). he knows how to turn the ac off, but it always ends up turning back on in the middle of the night

- he grew up learning The Gifted Child instrument; the piano. he dislikes classical music (he says it’s boring but it’s because of this). he also almost got forced to learn the violin but he once practiced so hard his fingers started bleeding which is how he got out of it

- likes verbal validation bc his parents never told him they were proud of him

taylor

- she/they cis demigirl, gets a bit upset at being misgendered though (people think she’s the transfem twin because tyler passes really well)

- bisexual fem pref

- decorates her locker for almost every occasion. halloween, christmas, easter, birthdays. also decorates other people’s lockers for their birthdays before school starts with sticky notes

- has tons of stuff in her locker (except food because tyler won’t let her) just in case anyone needs anything but she’s not very organized so she doesn’t know where anything is

- because of this she’s one of those people that barely makes it to the door before the bell rings but she’s trying to fix that habit

- enjoys crime documentaries/true crime, horror stuff. used to make tyler watch with her but his anxiety gets really bad and he started getting paranoid

- adores christmas bc it’s a family holiday she makes tyler and her mom homemade gifts every year

- loves dogs with every bone in her body she asks santa for one every year but alas. tyler always has to write “a letter from santa” back saying they ran out of dogs at the north pole

- uses emoticons like “:D :] :3” all the time when she types, downloaded a bunch of sticker packs too. especially cat ones

- had her future all planned out as a kid and told her dad she’d be a mechanical engineer and build trains and rockets to bring him places when he started getting really sick and couldn’t move anymore

- her hair is actually kind of dry (compared to aiden’s or ashlyn’s) because they couldn’t afford great shampoo or anything

- has an ehh skincare routine and doesn’t care much for her fashion sense, just wears whatever’s comfortable

- knows a lot of random facts as conversation starters, she’s surprisingly good at small talk ( + comforting people)

- gossips with aiden aallll the time bc she’s super sociable and knows lots of people who tell her secrets. she doesn’t tell any of the important ones but just little drama things

- her and aiden are bffs

- really likes kids because they’re funny, she has a big imagination like them so it’s easy for her to play with them

- she’s a swiftie and whenever someone asks her if she likes taylor swift as a joke bc of her name she says “i like all music!” (she loves tswift)

- really likes sweets over most types of food, she’s healing her inner child guys

- has always ALWAYS wanted to go to a circus/carnival/festival when she was younger, but they couldn’t afford tickets. she still has that dream but she obviously has bigger priorities now…

tyler

- transmale he/him

- doesn’t care that much about dating, he actually doesn’t think about it that much until he meets The Gang. he always too busy taking care of his family to bother with relationships

- dislikes heavy meals, eats in small portions. it’s a habit

- used to be a picky eater but isn’t anymore, when he was younger they struggled to put food on the table so

- he’s like tigris from ballad of songbirds and snakes; when he prepared food for the family he’d eat bits and pieces of it while cooking. eats raw meat sometimes but once got sick from it so never again because he doesn’t want people taking care of him

- he HATES being sick. HATES HATES HATES it, hates having to burden people

- stress cooks because he likes having things to do with his hands. he also runs laps/paces around when he’s stressed

- runs his hands through his hair so it’s always messy

- he doesn’t bother combing his hair unless it’s for a special occasion like the first day of school, he just doesn’t care that much

- gets up early like aiden to keep up his physical fitness, doesn’t stray far though because his mom wakes up around the same time he does

- is VERY punctual. will be furious if someone makes plans and then is late. always arrives somewhere like, fifteen minutes early. he’s trying to break taylor’s habit of being late

- occasionally scolds taylor about how messy her locker is

- is extremely (and kind of scarily) meticulous. clean backpack, clean locker, clean room. it’s a habit

- book smart and figures things out pretty easily. he has an internal computer inside his head i swear. latches onto concepts very quickly

- likes math because he’s good at memorizing concepts but biology is his worst enemy, he gets queasy very easily

- motion sickness

- doesn’t actually have a set plan for the future, other than “help his family.” will probably do something related to sports (sports scholarship) or will do something math/analytical related

- spams people when they don’t respond to him but quits eventually (semicanon)

- has some sort of separation anxiety i swear he does

- keeps every single promise he makes because he hates broken promises (his dad told him he’d be fine and out of the hospital soon), he also doesn’t make a lot of promises

- dislikes nicknames like “champ” and “buddy”

- he’s ambidextrous

- he always seems to be like, tense? can’t relax at all. it might be because of his anxiety (HE HAS ANXIETY)

- only ever relaxes if he’s at home

- rarely watches television, he says it’s a waste of time (he always gets distracted and gets up and goes to do something else) he can leave it in the background though

- i think he has chronic pain, i don’t know where but i just think he does. everything just aches sometimes and he’s so young fuck life

- he’s okay with kids like his sister, not as good as her but he’ll take care of them (habit x37362828) he’d probably say everything really monotone though “there’s santa claus, wow.”

- he and taylor both have a pretty strong southern accent from living in middle of nowhere georgia (i think someone made an art post on this a while back :D)

- is really bad at video games because he gets frustrated easily

- he grinds his teeth when he sleeps and has jaw pain what a loser

[fountainpenguin]

Riddle watches New Wish - Post #23

Hazel Wells and the Multiverse of Jenkins

PFFT-EH?-EHHH? It's confirmed daylight savings time? Then take down the posters that've been up for 30 episodes implying it was November, you goofs.

I'm thinking Hazel showed up around September or October (i.e. before the November Sneezy Hawkins dance and we know she was in school for a few weeks before the exam at the end of "Teacher's Pal," because she told us), then Antony came home for winter break, and now it's March. That gives us a good estimate of things like founder's day and Dev's birthday. In fact, we know exactly what the length of time between those two dates is because Dev told us his birthday was 9 years, 7 months, and 14 days ago. I guess that checks out since Antony probably came home in December. If it's March for daylight savings, that would be another 3 months. This also implies Dimmadelphia is farther south than Dimmsdale, which occasionally saw snow (though it's possible godkids were wishing for it). Dimmadelphia doesn't seem to get snow.

Or he could just say "set your clocks BACK" as soon as I unpause and I'll just... sit here with my little notes. it's fine.

We're confirmed for fall, then. Possibly Hazel's been here a year if the posters are to be believed, but also at this point, those posters stay up all year round, so they're not to be trusted even for Episode 1. Unclear what the summer situation is, but I'll make a proper timeline another time.

I would say this is the key episode to build a timeline around. Then roughly place Dev's birthday and then Founder's Day the appropriate time apart and fill in the blanks.

Looks like "Operation: Birthday Takeback" aired July 31st, which might be a good place to start if I want to canonize Dev's birthday date for fanfic purposes.

Founder's Day was around school because Dale was prepping during "A New Dev-elopment," when we know school was in session, so I'll do math and consider my options when I'm done with Season 1.

So... Dev just told Hazel someone has a crush on her, but I find that hard to believe because they're at odds and I can't imagine he has good reasons for chatting like this.

He called her a nickname, which he only does when they're not friendly. And no Peri to give her any clues...

I would not trust this man, but I respect the hustle.

Are we going to be manipulating time and space; is that why it's daylight savings?

They have a class pet:

Aw, I like how Winn became a Prime Meridian fan after the book club episode, apparently.

Huh. Was it Winn who had Shakespeare for Mimes early on? It's clearly in their locker. I could've sworn it was Jasmine, which is why I was confused she was afraid of clowns. Maybe she finished and gave it to them. I'm gonna check.

I say as I look up and see the clown toy sitting in her locker. Good for her for conquering her fears.

No, it was Jasmine (end of "Teacher's Pal")

Yes, those dance posters are still up. They're getting the boot from my canon.

Hazel's "next class" is Room 104, so that could theoretically be used to scout her classroom number. Which confuses me because we know she's on the 2nd floor, but okay.

I love Father Time; he's such a silly guy.

I like how Hazel is just... so stressed out about Jenkins having a crush on her.

I particularly enjoy like how after he said she was so confident in a flirty voice, Hazel's body literally shatters and then she rushes to the cereal, throws back her head, and gobbles it in bulk. She wants this so little, she's not willing to return his affection whatsoever. sldfkj.

Hazel in "Prime Meridian Love": I don't want a relationship; I'm only 10. Hazel now, even after I was starting to believe she might be growing a crush on Dev: I don't want a relationship; I'm only 10.

That's so funny...

Timmy: I have a crush on someone even though she's not interested in me, but I hope she'll change her mind. Hazel: you guys are having crushes??

I really like how Hazel's specific reason for not wanting Jenkins to like her is "I'm too self-conscious and can't remember how to act normal." She's a very anxious character...

It's not that she's into someone else, and it's not that she has anything against Jenkins specifically. She just is way too anxious and doesn't want to deal with it.

Hazel, scrambling for a way out without hurting Jenkins' feelings: I can't go around with you. I have a crush on someone else. Uh... Trev. Trev, who was behind her and she didn't notice: Did I just hear you have a crush on me, Hazel?? Hazel: /absorbs entire box of cereal in .2 seconds

She doesn't want ANYONE to like her!! she is 10 and squirmy!

I'm once again sad Dev cited Trev as "his bud" in Episode 1, but we haven't seen them interact. I feel like Trev existing on the periphery of her interactions with Dev would've made this even funnier, lmao.

That said, it's funny that Dev's description of Trev was "He's my bud, so he probably won't give YOU time of day" and Trev is out here like "I am totally down to give Hazel the time of day." He's just chillin' and smiling. I like him.

Hazel at the top of her lungs when the entire hallway flirts with her: I don't CARE who like-likes me! I don't like any of you BACK!!

Chloe and Hazel (to me):

Holy cow, Hazel. I don't have much to say, but I enjoy watching her screw people's memories up by manipulating time. And that's a heavy sentence to drop out of context, but...

Yeah, she just did 568 timeloops speedrun and now everyone has a crush on her.

Including Dev, apparently.

Should we be worried that Dev specifically cited the thing he finds attractive about Hazel to be "how ruthless she is," because buddy... You're on track to continue the Dimmadome abuse cycle!

Hey Dev, it's kind of weird to know her middle name. What've you been doing; who've you been talking to?

Wow, it took absolutely 0 thought for Dev to yell loudly about how in love he is with Hazel [in this time loop] for the whole hall to hear.

I am once again fascinated by how he's never cared for "maintaining a reputation" at this school in any way and he's willing to dropkick whatever "cool, tough, and closed-off" persona he's formed at the first sign of what he thinks is a better future.

Local rich kid desperate for affection once again willing to jump 12 feet if you ask him to jump 6. She asked him to jump 0. She asked him to sit down and not even think about jumping.

Dev "I would commit B&E for you a second time; please let me commit B&E for you a second time" Dimmadome.

I like how Dimmadomes are known for putting the Dimm name on everything, but we keep seeing Dev's first name used (such as in the episode title "A New Dev-elopment" or Peri's quote "I'm going to take you from Dev to Dev-ine!")

It gives me the vibe that yes, he's a Dimmadome, but he's a little disconnected. Wow, it's a pun AND sadness!

I can't stop thinking about how annoyed he sounded when the time came to finally tell Vicky his last name. All the other Dimmadomes repeatedly introduce themselves by their full name... but he holds back.

Also, I like how the O-pairs are always down for anything. Dev is their special boy <3

I really really like them for some reason and I'm sorry because I can already tell any Dev 'fic I write is going to lean into them. My curse of getting attached to weird background characters unfortunately continues and these might be the worst ones I've ever fallen for. I don't look forward to trying to search up cute 'fics or fanart of them. haha; I'm in danger...

I just looked up how to spell O-pair because I was tired of not knowing and I found this Wikipedia page:

au pair /ˌō ˈper/ - An au pair (/oʊˈpɛər/; pl.: au pairs) is a person working for, and living as part of, a host family. Typically, au pairs take on a share of the family's responsibility for child care as well as some housework, and receive a monetary allowance or stipend for personal use.

oh. okay.

IMBD's "Operation: Birthday Takeback" page lists them as O-Pair #1 and O-Pair #2, which just hurts.

Dev: My dad gives me the coolest gadgets. They have fancy futuristic names. They're my friends and I love them :) Dale, who knew exactly what he was doing:

Wow, it's TWO puns and sadness!!

Hazel's theme song, but it's rewritten for Dev and the "pair quite strange" who changed his life are the O-Pairs.

I like how in "Operation: Birthday Takeback," Peri's instinctual disguise was an O-Pair, which is incredibly fitting now that I see this description.

I wish we saw signs of Peri hanging around Dev, like a pin on his shirt or the headphones again. Or maybe I'm afraid.

This is nuts. How many hours did Hazel just live through? She needs a nap... Aw, I like the moral lesson for this episode (Letting go and not obsessing over things you can't change). Mr. Guzman is a lovely character; he's so friendly.

Also:

Jenkins: Um... I don't have a crush on you, Hazel. Dev: PSYCH! I made it up~!

She's SO mad. sdfjk

"DEV DIMMADOME!"

I've never seen her this mad. That's great.

Local anxious girl just put herself through some of the worst experiences she's faced, and for WHAT??

He's just a quirky little guy! You wouldn't hurt a quirky little guy!! He's just goofin' with you~

- This feels extremely in-character for Dev considering he outfoxed the never-before-beaten negotiator aliens in "Peace of Pizza" by memeing on them. He's just a silly wittle boy... I'm fascinated by the way his mind works. - I'm not sure Dev even knows how his mind works.

That was great! I liked that. I don't often see a character trying to work through feelings about crushes like this and I enjoyed it.

[no-psi-nan]

Haha no worries! It's downplayed a lot in the series because it's supposed to be a comedy, but when you start looking more closely at the stuff Kuniharu does, it paints a picture of a terrible father and a bad husband too.

It's been a topic on the blog several times, so I'm sure people can chime in with more evidence, but here's what's off the top of my head...

Raised Kusuke. Nuff said tbh lol.

Kuniharu calls Kusuo a monster multiple times and is almost certainly the reason why Kusuke and Kusuo himself believe that Kusuo is an inhuman freak. This attitude is certainly not coming from Kurumi, and nobody else knew about Kusuo's power. From the beginning of the series, Kusuo genuinely believes he's unable to connect with other human beings, and it's mostly because of this attitude inherited from his father.

Kuniharu is never seen attempting to prevent Kusuke from constantly picking fights with his brother, and only attempting to discipline Kusuo for behavior that Kuniharu considers disrespectful to him. This is mostly a fact by omission, but we do see him belittling Kusuke when the kid obviously already has an inferiority problem.

Kuniharu is one of the worst performers at his job and the first to be let go in the case of a crisis. When he loses his job, he's unable to find any others because his only real skill is shoe-licking. This was a parody chapter though so questionably canon. He's always running late for his job though and we see him trying to make a manga artist rip off Naruto, so honestly it makes sense that he's that bad at his job. The only time he's shown as slightly competent at his job was during a parody chapter too hsfjdlshfks.

However what's definitely canon is that he either doesn't make much money or mis-spends most of it. In an area where Nendo's mom, a single woman, and Satou's family, the exact average family, can afford to live, Kuniharu had to take out an 80 year mortgage to pay for a similarly sized home. For context, most mortgages are for 30 years, 15 if you git gud. Btw, the house was literally a gift from Kusuke, Kuniharu insisted on paying out of manly pride or something. Sir, Kusuke is a freaking billionaire and this is like the only single no-strings-attached genuinely kind thing he's ever done hsfjdlshfks

Completely irresponsible with money: has a huge Valentine's day budget for his wife's gift ($3,000 iirc?) and then spends it all at the bar paying for his coworkers' drinks (the same guys who abuse him at his job and think he's garbage). He also spends huge amounts of money on his model figure collection, and has a whole room of gym equipment he never uses. As a result, Kusuo has a very small allowance and for some reason, his one favorite food (coffee jelly) is not included in the grocery list. Even though Kusuo canonically gets insane rock bottom prices for literally everything that gets bought in the household. How do you fuck up so badly financially that you can't buy your clinically depressed son the one (inexpensive!) thing that brings him joy??

By the way, Kuniharu started dating Kurumi when he was a college student and she was in high school. Kusuke was born like a year after they met, so you can do the math about how little time he spent before knocking her up 😬 They basically had a shotgun wedding. No wonder Kurumi's dad is NOT a fan of Kuniharu...

Literally one of the first chapters is Kuniharu and Kurumi domestic violence but make it funny. They're throwing furniture, Kuniharu is breaking the windows, Kurumi is yeeting her husband, and all this shit is over a single coffee jelly, which again, should be a normal part of the groceries for their household. They constantly bring their son into this drama too, which I'm sure is fantastic for his mental and emotional development btw.

There's a manga exclusive chapter that's a parody, so questionably canon, but in it Kuniharu physically attacks Kusuo multiple times over differences in opinion.

However, it IS canon that Kuniharu takes any opportunity to try to physically harm Kusuo. Ex. Hitting him in the massage episode and trying to step on him when he turns tiny.

Canon tries to redeem him a bit by showing moments where Kusuo is a baby and Kuniharu is trying really hard to make him smile because he wants his baby boy to be happy. Unfortunately that just makes it seem like he tried to be a good father for a bit when Kusuo was a baby, and then as soon as Kusuo's powers developed enough to make him miserable (the time when he needs the MOST familial support!), Kuniharu just gives up, and starts using Kusuo as his personal genie in a bottle. While also trying to fix his own fragile ego by attempting to establish dominance over his son. ????? Get therapy bro.

Canon also shows that Kuniharu's love points for Kusuo are the same as for his wife, however, not even Kuniharu believes that, as he tries to run away to evade it hsfjdlshfks. And even if he does love his son that much, he certainly doesn't show it in any meaningful way, because his literal MIND-READING SON doesn't know that. There are plenty of parents who truly love their kids and still abuse them like hell because they think that's the right thing to do (see Kaido's mom being overly strict because she wants to see him succeed in life), so the love points don't mean much imo.

Kuniharu does dole out a couple of pieces of wisdom (at Kusuo's wrong date birthday party and in the volcano arc) but that really doesn't make up for anything and even his wife thinks he's childish so... 🇫

Kuniharu is definitely funny as a character, and like I said, most of this requires digging into canon a little more, but once you start looking, it becomes clear that Kuniharu is just not a good person, father, or husband.

Like, I totally get that having a genius and a god as your kids would not be easy for any parent, but Kuniharu really doesn't try to make life better for either of his sons, preferring to get into petty squabbles with his wife and play video games/build models the rest of the time. I'm not saying dads can't have hobbies, but the only times we see him spending time with Kusuo is usually when he's begging for a favor, and he also clearly does zero housework whatsoever, so...

Anyways, I think Kurumi deserves a better husband and Kusuo deserves a better parent (or at least a break from being used as a magical favor vending machine lol) so I often joke on here that Kurumi should get a divorce and run polls about who she should marry instead and such!

Hope this helps! 👍🏾 Thanks for the question!

[elizabethzoopzoop986]

My toxic trait is that I head canon that Hanako made a group chat with Mei, Mitsuba and Akane (because none of the other mysteries have phones) to make communication and giving them orders easier but instead Mei, Mitsuba and Akane just bully him all day on it.

Hanako: *some directive as no.7*

Mei: this is why you don’t get bitches

Mitsuba: damn bruh just got called out lmao

Hanako: NOT TRUE

Mei: ??? Example

Hanako: Yashiro for one

Mitsuba: you’re like 50 years old how do you even know how to use a phone boomer?? Plus your literally not even her type I’m pretty sure she just feels bad for you

Hanako: not true!!! 😡

Mei: not the 😡 I’m dying

Akane: Guys I was in math what did I miss??

Mei: oh you know just the usual😊

Akane: oh so violently bullying honorable no.7??

Mitsuba: you got it

Hanako: I hate you all

Mitsuba: why do we even call him honorable no.7?? Like what is that

Mei: honestly idk

Akane: good point, like what’s honorable about living in a girls bathroom

Akane: oh wait he’s not even alive

Hanako: HEY!

Mei: you literally killed your self you can’t be mad at that even…

Mitsuba: 💀

Mei: anyway about what no.3 said I think we should just call him stinky toilet boy instead!!

*Hanako blocks them all*

And then eventually he unblocks them to trying to do more telling them what to do and the cycle just repeats

Also they definitely defend each other when they say stupid things just to make Hanako even more mad like:

Mitsuba: *ironically sends the most incomprehensible meme ever*

Hanako: actually what

Mei: are you insulting a child?? You a whole boomer insulting someone born this year?? A whole infant just being bullied by his grandpa

Akane: istg if you weren’t dead I’d call cps

Mei: honestly like who let this man haunt a school??

Akane: fr and how are you gonna insult him as if you wouldn’t unironically send that

Hanako: i deny all allegations

Mei: stfu

Mitsuba: thanks guys :))

Mei: anything for you pookie 💕

Hanako: I hate you all

Akane: awww I hate you too <3

Mei: we all hate you no.7 so I’m glad the feeling is mutual 💕💕💕

*And then Hanako goes and cries to Nene*

[whatever-color-of-the-rainbow]

RTC HEADCANONS GO ‼️‼️

OMG YES THANK YOU. I HAVE A LOT.

I think that Karnak lets everyone come back to life at the end for two reasons. One: let’s be real, putting them through all that just to bring them all back is such a Karnak thing to do. And two: THEY DESERVE IT GODDAMNIT

Noel’s favorite band is The Smiths

Mischa likes giving Ricky stickers to put on his cane or wheelchair

Ocean is aroace, but didn’t know she was aroace for a long time. She just thought she was “too mature” and “too focused on her schoolwork” to have crushes

Penny lets Noel borrow her dresses sometimes

Constance is extremely prone to infodumping (Penny could listen to her for hours though)

Ricky likes to “accidentally” run over Ocean’s toes with his wheelchair when she babies him

Mischa and Noel actually aren’t that bad at math; Mischa has a C and Noel has a B. Ocean just views anything below an A as ���bad”.

Penny dressed up as Jane Doe for Halloween, and the rest of the choir found this hilarious

Taylor Swift is Ocean’s favorite singer and Penny’s celebrity crush

Constance has had a crush on everyone in the choir at some point (including Noel, but this was before he came out)

Ricky and Noel once tried to write a Monique/Bachelor Man crossover, but because their stories and writing styles were so different, it failed miserably. Now Ricky just draws pictures of Monique and the Bachelor Man kissing instead.

Ocean likes to wake up early, and Constance does not. So when they have sleepovers, Constance will often wake up and Ocean will have breakfast ready for her.

Ricky and Noel like to go on double dates with Constance and Penny

Noel and Ricky are both genderfluid. Noel is AMAB and Ricky is AFAB, and they’re both prone to dysphoria. If they had a nickel for every joke they made about switching bodies, Noel would have enough money to move to France and take the whole rest of the choir with him.

After the Cyclone thing, Mischa spends more evenings at Ricky’s place than his own

Prior to the Cyclone, Noel is extremely protective of Constance because of the way Ocean treats her

Mischa once overheard Noel talking about RuPaul’s Drag Race during choir. He thought it was an actual racing show and started watching it. It wasn’t what he expected, but it is now his favorite show. (This is technically semi-canon; in the high school edition, Mischa mentioned this.)

Penny and Noel are the definition of gay/lesbian solidarity

Penny and Constance like to go on picnic dates

Ocean and Noel are basically siblings. They actually do love each other and know each other better than anyone, but they live for getting on each other’s nerves, and Noel isn’t afraid to call Ocean out on her bullshit.

Ricky, Noel, Ocean: cat people

Mischa, Constance, Penny: dog people

They’re all autistic, I don’t make the rules

For Noel’s birthday, Ocean made him a bracelet that said his name with red and green beads (because Christmas). In return, Noel made Ocean a bracelet with her name and orange, yellow, white, blue, and teal beads (because beach colors; little did he know that those would become the aroace colors). They trade those bracelets every time they see each other.

Constance once made the mistake of having Mischa watch Up with her. He cried.

Ocean was Constance’s queer awakening in eighth grade. The crush lasted for about four months. ‘Twas a very awkward four months.

Mischa had a crush on a guy before meeting Talia, but didn’t realize it was a crush at the time because it was the mid 2000s and queerness wasn’t really talked about as much as it is today. When Ricky mentioned being bisexual, Mischa came to the conclusion that he was too.

Penny has what might be the greenest eyes that any of her friends have ever seen on a human

Constance is really good at styling hair, so Ocean and Penny always go to her when they want to have their hair look nice for a concert or contest

Ricky’s really good at doing people’s makeup