#she just does not understand anything ever she's so me
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kpoperotics · 3 days ago
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A night with Yuna x male reader
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Yuna, your affectionate girlfriend. She enjoys you in a way she can't even describe, it's just that it's her first time and she's a little insecure.
Yuna, your needy yet insecure girlfriend is cooking for you, cooking is one of her hobbies she loves the most. She's making dinner for you, a simple one, nothing fancy; yet she pours her heart in what she does.
You're in the bedroom, chilling out on your phone when you hear sounds coming from the kitchen, so you decide to get up and go to help her if she needed. Once you're in the kitchen you see her walking around the kitchen, grabbing whatever she needs to prepare the food while she sings softly.
"Hey, do you need help?" you ask
"OH!" she gasps suddenly
oh, my god y/n, you scared me.. please don't do it anymore..!
She sighs
"and yeah... I'd appreciate if you could help me my love"
You giggle, helping her cooking.
"you're kind for helping me.." she whispers softly
"just doing what I like, I like helping you sweetheart"
You both make food together, enjoying each other's company. Then, once the dinner is made you sit and eat. You two have quite a conversation that evening
"so, Yuna, have you done what I told you today?" you know already that she hasn't done anything you told her, but not common things like buying the milk.
"eum... I-I.. well.." she stammers "I-I..."
"you didn't, mh?" you say
She looks down. Feeling ashamed "no.. I didn't.." she whispers softly, her voice trembling and insecure
"I told you... everyday you wake up, you have to look in the mirror, stare directly into your eyes and repeat to yourself that you're worth everything, that you're loved and that you're making it through everything"
Yuna looks down in shame and sadness
"sorry.." she whispers
"don't say that" You decide to go next to her, you know how hard it is for her to do something like that and you're not going to give up on her that easily
"b-but I'm a disaster.. I can't even say a simple phrase"
You look directly in her eyes, yet your stare is soft and understanding. "Yuna..." You envelop her in your arms, a few tears roll down her cheeks
"No Yuna.. don't cry" you wipe away her tears with your thumb. "Here come with me" you grab her in your arms and carry her to the couch, you sit and she stays on top of you, sitting on your lap; with your arms wrapped around her.
She's not crying her heart out, she's just letting some tears go, the weight of her actual mental health weighing on her. "Yuna, you need to believe in yourself, just like I do, I do believe in you and you know it"
You kiss the top of her head softly, then, you look directly into her eyes. Her eyes are wet and a little swollen, making her look cuter than she usually looks
"look at this girl, it's so impossible to hate her"
She looks at you, then she looks away. She leans her ear on your heart, listening to your heartbeat. The sound soothes her aching soul as she sinks into a full state of calmness and relax
You let her hear your heart beating, knowing how much this affects her positively
"Can I ask you something, Yuna?"
"yes..?" she answers
"Have you ever thought about us?" you ask
"about... about us..? well yes, I did sometimes... why you ask?"
"just to know, you know that I often think about us, about you"
"and that's why I love you.." she say softly, leaning in, capturing your lips in a soft delicate peck
You cup her head kindly with your hands, holding her in place as you slowly deepen the kiss. In short time, the kiss is deepened, you both pouring your heart in it
Yuna snuggles her body into yours as you hold her head in such a loving way. The kiss keeps going, just that way, not deeper but not shallower. The love in the air is palpable, the affection you pour in her soul every single second of your existence healing her from inside. You softly break the kiss, looking at her, beautiful like always.
"I'm so in love with you.." she says
"and so am I, my love" you answer
It's like the time has stopped, you two look into each other's eyes while you're also holding her tiny form in your arms. But then you decide to act a little bolder and ask her "Yuna, what do you think.. are you ready to make love?"
She blushes furiously, not knowing what to say at first "n-now?"
"yea, now" you answer, caressing her hair
She looks at you, the most insecure, scared yet trustful gaze. She doesn't know what to say, if yes or no. She's never had it before. She's virgin, and the idea of having sex with you now scares her
"you're safe here, you know that? I'm not going to hurt you I know it's your first time".
She looks at you, insecure. She thinks for a while as you keep caressing her and hold her close to you, then she says "okay, I-I think I can do it.."
Her hands are shaking, you hold them and bring them to your chest, tranquilizing her.
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"you're sure, mh?"
She nods softly, snuggling into you. She trusts you but she's scared "will it hurt?" she asks, "it may hurt at the first penetration"
She sighs softly in anxiety "it's okay, I'm ready to have this with you"
So after only a few seconds, you start taking off her clothes, slowly removing her bra with just a hand, allowing you to admire her tiny perfect breast.
"I'm starting, okay?"
"o-okay.." she trembles, but she knows you're not going to hurt her
You lean in and start kissing around her breast, your kisses are soft and delicate. She trembles more and she holds you tighter, she feels hot flashes as her traumas, insecurities and fears kicks in, but she doesn't want you to stop, she wants to overcome everything she's endured.
You keep going, now licking her nipples carefully. You feel her trembling and breathing quite heavily, but you keep going knowing she's fighting so good.
"You're doing so good Yuna" you say, she smiles at you.
"Keep.. I kinda like it though" she answer, and so you keep going. You lick her breast a little more, while your hands are starting to roam lower on her body.
She starts to breathe slightly heavier than usual, letting few really soft moans as you keep. She wraps her arms around your neck to pull you closer, you can tell she's quite liking this.
"I think I'm ready for more" Yuna says, her voice just above a whisper.
"Are you?" you answer.
"Yes, I am.." She says. So after she confirmed, you lie her down on the bed, making sure she's comfortable with you. You take your space between her legs, lying down on your belly and covering her thighs with your arms. You slowly and kindly start licking her folds and as you do that Yuna can't help but let out a surprised and aroused gasp. She's still where she is, too shy and embarrassed to do anything.
You take her hands in yours, making sure she feels safe besides the pleasure you know she's feeling. You keep licking her folds carefully and expertly, knowing well how to move since this isn't your first time.
Yuna moans and she tightens her grip on your hands while you give her all that pleasure. "Oh my goodness I feel something.." she whimpers, you know what she's feeling even if she doesn't
"You're coming Yuna, it's alright. You're cumming"
She looks at you, even if she can't focus at all and tries to speak something "a-am.. I.. am I what..?"
She doesn't even get to finish her sentence that her juices are all already on your tongue.
She trembles hardly and almost screams as she comes, it's the first time she feels so good, this good. She's amazed from her orgasm.
She looks at you amazed "W-wow.." you look back at her, "you liked it?"
"I loved it" she answers.
"c-can I try to... to suck your dick...?" she asks with a slight trembling voice
You chuckle and caress her softly "of course you can sweetheart".
So as you allow her, she shyly kneels down in front of you, taking off your pants with your underwear. You would have never said she was shy and bold in the same time.
She looks at it in awe, it's big and hard and even if it's her first time, she knows it's because of her. She gets closer to your shaft, looking at you with her soft eyes. "Don't be afraid, do it" you say, while stroking her head gently.
So after few seconds of her staring at it in awe, she parts her lips and takes it in her mouth, slowly, only the head first.
You watch her doing her best, and considering it's her first time, she's doing an esteemed job. She keeps going, slowly and taking more of you in her mouth. Taking her time, taking things slow; and you let her, you won't force anything.
Little by little she sucks you completely. She's now doing an admirable job, taking you deeper in her mouth. She bobs her head up and down on your shaft, making you let out a soft moan of pleasure. She's happy she's doing a great job on her first time, taking a little more of you with each bob.
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"Yuna you're an absolute goddess, how can you be so talented and it's only your first time.." You moan, while she doesn't pull away from your cock, too content to do a blowjob to you like this. She bobs her head slightly faster now, her confidence growing more and more with each bob and second passing.
"Oh Yuna, yes so good.. keep going" you say, caressing her head and encouraging her to do more again. She takes a short break, maybe a second or 2 before getting back on your length.
As she resumes her blowjob, she goes a little deeper, not much, but enough to almost push you over the edge.
"Yuna, I'm close, get ready for it.." you whimper.
Yuna closes her eyes again, not knowing what she's going to have. Excited to find out, she keeps going, her eyes closed, her lips running on your cock.. and then the moment comes. You come in her mouth. Her eyes open wide and she stops there where she is, her lips on the head of your cock.. trying to pull out every last drop of your cum from your balls.
"Wow Yuna.. you certainly have a talent here.." you say, amazed from her skills.
She smiles at you shyly "T-thank you y/n" she looks at you happily "I'm glad I was good"
You smile at her back. "next time, we'll go ahead.."
She gets up and leans on you "okay" she says, happily.
...After that, you're both on the couch in each other's arms watching a movie together.
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hoshifighting · 10 hours ago
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hellooo I just want to say that I like your blog, I really like your writing style🫶🏻🫶🏻 AND
what do you think about Vernon finding the reader's twitter spam account? at first, without saying anything, he follows her from a fake account and learns her fetishes and things like that. then he can't hold back and teasing the reader because of this situation and does all the things she reposts, all she wants and imagines(I honestly can't decide whether they will be friends or lovers and I leave it to you)
thank you very much in advance🩷🩷🩷🩷
when vernon finds out about your freaky tweets
WARNINGS: smut, face slapping, BIG DICK!VERNON, cock riding, mentions of hair pulling, dirty talk, choking.
it starts innocently enough; you’ve got your little spam account, this place where you post anything that comes to mind without a second thought. it’s private, anonymous—you’re safe, or so you think. until one day, you start noticing a new follower, someone with zero posts and a random handle, lurking in the notifications. you brush it off, figuring it’s just some bot. but vernon… well, vernon's been piecing things together. and one night, after reading one of your latest posts—something so NASTY that practically burned his screen—he decides he can't just pretend he hasn’t seen it. so he waits until you’re in the living room next saturday, all comfortable, maybe a little too comfortable. you look up, seeing him standing there with that little frown he gets when he's too stressed to understand something, a raised eyebrow, and his phone in his hand.
“so… ‘i just want him to hold me down and—’” he reads aloud, and you feel everything in you freeze up as he raises an eyebrow at you. “‘then pull my hair back so i can see his face… maybe, idk, slap me around a little?’ really, y/n?”
you scramble, trying to play it cool “vernon—wait, why—where’d you see that?”
“oh, i dunno. i’ve been following this account for a while. figured i’d wait until you posted something really crazy before bringing it up.”
you stammer, face going hot. “i—you didn’t have to read it out loud like that, jesus.”
“oh, come on,” he says, leaning in, crowding your space just enough to make you feel cornered “you can post it, but i can’t say it?”
you swallow hard “i didn’t… i didn’t think you’d see it.”
“didn’t think i’d find out?” he echoes, voice dropping a little. “you know, all this time, i’ve been seeing these little things you like. i didn’t say anything because i thought you’d be embarrassed. but now…” he smirks, leaning back with a sigh, watching you. “now i think maybe i should give you some of what you’re so clearly craving.”
“vernon,” you say, trying to keep your voice steady, but it’s hard when he’s looking at you like he’s imagining every filthy thing you’ve ever posted.
he smirks, reaching out to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. “oh, don’t go all shy on me now. i’ve read what you want. all of it. let’s start with the basics, huh?” his hand trails down, tipping your chin up, thumb brushing over your bottom lip. “you wanna ride me? why didn’t you just say so?”
you feel your heart pounding as he pulls you closer, he's practically purring as he goes, “or that other thing you posted—what was it? something about choking you?” he wraps his hand lightly around your throat, thumb brushing over the sensitive skin as he watches your reaction. “like this?”
you almost cant nod, you're melting, your breath coming short as he tightens his grip just enough to make you feel it “so pretty when you’re horny,” he murmurs, fingers pressing just a little more.
and when you shake your head, he grins, pulling you onto his lap, guiding you to straddle him as his hands settle on your hips “guess i’ve gotta make up for all those little fantasies you’ve been hiding, huh?”
“you sure you can handle it?” he whispers, leaning in, lips brushing against your neck. “’cause i don’t think you really knew what you were asking for when you posted all that.”
but you nod, he tilts your head up, lips brushing over yours, and you feel his hand come up, palm grazing over your cheek before he slaps you—just a little, just enough to make you gasp. he chuckles when you moan, liquefying on his lap, fingers tilting your face back to him.
[...]
he’s already watching you with a azy smirk, eyes rolling sliighty as you sink down onto him, your thighs trembling as you struggle to take all of him in. and god, he’s big. you knew he would be—you’d guessed it a dozen times in all those reckless tweets, wondering just how good it’d feel, but feeling it now, it’s like all that teasing turned on you, stretching you almost too much, and every inch you take feels like a challenge.
“aww, look at you,” he coos, his hands resting on your hips, fingers rubbing little circles into your skin as you try to ease down, taking him deeper, even though it’s making your breath catch, making you whimper and shake. “what happened, baby? i thought you said you could handle it.”
you bite your lip, cheeks burning, and he chuckles, leaning in closer, voice low and teasing. “or maybe you just wanted me to be big so you could talk all that shit on your little account,” he murmurs, running his thumb over your lip. “all those tweets you made, talking about wanting me to be, what—eight, nine inches?” he grins, watching the way you flush, the way your hands grip his shoulders to steady yourself. “think you got what you wished for, hm?”
“shut up,” you manage to whisper, but it’s so breathless, your body clenching around him, and he laughs, hands guiding you down just a bit further, his hips lifting just a little to meet you, that makes you gasp, makes you try to pull back, but he keeps you there, fingers firm on your hips.
“no, no, let’s see you take it,” he whispers, voice rough with that soft teasing. “come on, baby. don’t tell me this is too much. you wanted all of it, right?”
you nod, trying to adjust, but it’s almost too much fr, too thick, too deep, and he watches you with those hooded eyes, savoring every single whimper you make. “it’s okay,” he says softly, almost soothing as he leans up to kiss you, but you can hear that cocky lilt in his tone. “you’re doing so good. even if you can’t take all of it… god, you’re trying, huh?”
and he’s right there, brushing his lips over your cheek, murmuring sweet, filthy encouragements into your ear as you sink down a little more, taking just a bit more of him, even though your body’s practically begging for a break. “that’s it… there you go. so good, baby. i’m impressed,” he purrs, hands trailing up your back. “i didn’t think you’d take even this much.”
every time you pause, every time your breath catches, he’s right there, fingers digging into your hips, guiding you, helping you ride him “guess you really wanted to know..” he murmurs, grinning as he watches you struggle, your head falling back as you finally take just a little more, his hands pulling you down hard against him until you can feel every inch of him.
“there it is… that’s my girl,” he whispers, in asatisfied rasp, his eyes dark as he watches you ride him, just as you’d dreamed about, exactly as you’d hoped—only now it’s even better.
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rekino2114 · 2 days ago
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Drv3 girls struggling to open a soda can for you only for himiko to open it easily
A/n:this is very much inspired by a scenario i saw in a wattpad story with some sdra2 characters that I thought was really funny
Kaede akamatsu
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She was actually the one who suggested helping you when she saw you struggling to open the can
"Are you sure kaede? It's really tough"
"Don't worry, I got it. Playing piano really strengthens your fingers, you know?
She tries her best but eventually gives you the can back when she understands she can't open it
"Sorry y/n, you were right i think the can might be broken or something"
"Oh it's fine I'll just ask himiko"
"Himiko?"
She had her mouth wide open when himiko managed to open without any problem and needed a bit of time to let the shock go away
"Wow, himiko, I had no idea you were this strong you seem so lazy and short.......n-no offense, sorry"
Kirumi tojo
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"Sorry kirumi do you mind opening this can for me?"
"Of course dear, I'd do anything for you"
Her whole ultimate is doing tasks for others, opening a can should be the easiest thing ever to her........except for this one it seems
She really doesn't want to disappoint you, so she tries for a while politely declining anyone who wants to help her.
She also tries other methods like using a towel or even taking off her gloves to open the lid but dejectedly gives up when she sees nothing works
"I am truly sorry y/n, I apologize for not being able to satisfy your request. Shall I call gonta?"
"Oh no Don't worry kirumi, I'll call himiko"
She's surprised by you choosing himiko, but even more when she actually opens it, she puts her gloved hand over her mouth to try to hide her shock
"Are you alright rumi?"
"......y-yes, pardon my surprise I just......didn't expect that"
Angie yonaga
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She does a weird prayer before trying to open the can
"Oh great, atua. I ask that you give me the strength to open this can for my beloved"
She proceeds to try to open it for a few seconds before giving up and trying to blast it with divine power
"Oh, I'm sorry y/n but it seems atua is resting, and he can't open the can now"
"T-that's fine I'll just ask himiko"
"Hm?"
Initially she doesn't have too much of a reaction when himiko opens the can but she then clasps her hands together and smiles brightly
"Oh himiko it seems atua has chosen to bestow his power upon you. You must be a chosen one. You have to join me and y/n in his worship"
"N-nyeh?"
Tenko has to grab her and lead her away from your girlfriend
Tenko chabashira
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"You asked the right person y/n, I got it"
She, in fact, did not get it
She genuinely tried her best though, she's pretty strong, so she just tried to pull the lid off , before trying again with all her strength and finally using some weird neo aikido move on it.
She'd rather die than ask a male for help and she really wants to impress you so she does anything she can to open it until she's sweating and breathing heavily
"A-are you ok tenko? If you can't do it, I can ask-"
"N-no don't worry, it's just a little....tight....I-I can do it"
We she finally gives up, she slams her head on the table in disappointment
"It's fine tenko, don't be like this himiko can do it"
"........hi.....miko?"
The moment himiko opens the can, she gets up and smiles in happiness. It's like a switch was flipped on her
"Wow you're so amazing himiko, did you use some of your magic?"
Miu iruma
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"A soda can? really? You can't open a fucking soda can?"
"You try if you're so confident"
"Of course, I'm confident for a good reason"
The words die in her mouth as she struggles to open it, she cusses for a bit before throwing the can on the ground while blushing intensely
When even that doesn't work she puts her goggles on and tries to see if there's something wrong with it, when she concludes it's just a normal soda can she throws it again and swears at it one last time for good measure
"Soooo it's just a soda can isn't it?"
"S-Shut up, I should invent something for that"
"Don't worry I'll just ask himiko to open it"
"Eh?"
She blushes even more and her jaw drops when she sees himiko has, in fact, managed to open the soda can
"W-what the fuck? How did that flat chested shortstack did it? OK that's it, I'm definitely inventing something for that"
"A can opener already exists you know?"
"Well mine will be all robotic and better"
Maki harukawa
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"You can't open it?"
"Yeah"
She sighs before taking the can from your hand, closing her eyes and pulling the lid.
This girl has the training of an assassin, she could choke an adult with her bare hands. she can open a soda can.......
not this time, apparently
When she feels that it didn't open, she opens her eyes and makes a surprised "Hm?" Before trying again repeatedly
She's this close to pulling out a knife and just slicing the lid when kokichi starts to tease her
"Geez you can't even open a soda can? And I thought you were supposed to be-"
"Shut up. Do you wanna die?"
When she gives up, you give her a kiss on the cheek to cheer her up and call himiko.
When the magician opens the can she has the most shocked expression you have ever seen on her face
"...........what? How did she........*sighs* whatever"
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kinardsevan · 1 day ago
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I was totally genuine because I would love your stuff on 911 proper! They're dropping the ball with everything atm, which is so damn frustrating, considering the setup they gave themselves this spring.
Much love! 🤗
Glad for the clarification! ❤️❤️
I can totally understand your feelings. Mine aren’t far off. I waffle back and forth basically by the hour over whether this is all a tee-up and there’s real intention behind it, or whether they truly did give up the best thing that they’ve had in years.
One of my biggest struggles on it all and how it doesn’t make sense, is the active effort to include Tommy/Lou in the social media posts and ABCs use of him in ads as well. I understand that the networks opinion isn’t the end-all, be-all. But I just can’t coalesce all that’s been fed to us to this point, both from a story standpoint, and from the use of Lou/Tommy in the grander scheme at large. It doesn’t make any sense in the narrative, regardless of the ideals that some people have about him being a plot point or “entry level relationship”. One of the quotes I think back on is when Oliver said he wanted to see these two go through the struggles do in their first year of a relationship. That quote alone was one of the things (along with the intentional use of “Evan”) that said to me “people want this to be a short story, but these factors point to Tommy being around long-term”. It goes to the issue that Tommy does not see Evan as “Buck”, when we have already extrapolated that Buck is a mask. We’ve known that since season 3 when he told Bobby that putting on his uniform makes him feel like he can do anything, and “Buck” was a name he took on FOR work. It’s a dignification that creates separation for him from others. By relation, Evan can be as stripped bare and honest as he wants. This is why the use of his first name has always been important. Maddie can see him stripped down and bare, metaphorically speaking, because she knows his trauma. She’s his sister so she gets Evan rights. Eddie used his first name once with the will. In the same context as being stripped down, this was important because he wasn’t communicating with Buck from the standpoint of coworkers, but as a close friend telling him that he had made a decision about the safety and care of his child, should something happen to him. I can’t remember if we’ve ever seen Bobby use his first name, but this has always felt less important because of the father/son narrative.
We’ve seen Chimney throw around “Evan” in weird contexts, but I don’t think it’s a bad thing, so much as they have a unique relationship due to being coworkers, friends, and brothers simultaneously. I think that’s why anytime we hear him say “Evan”, it’s a bit of a play on fucking with him.
So when we cycle back to Tommy, who had only EVER called him Evan, using the name Buck is him forcing himself to create a separation. We also as a fanbase hear that and go “no, that’s wrong, it doesn’t sound right”.
At the end of the day, I cannot reason a fact to build all of this into a narrative (and I do mean ALL of it), include Lou in social media posts, have him be involved in interviews about the show… all to set it on fire 13 episodes after he returns. You’d have to have a damn good reason for doing so, like an actor wanting to leave or being so problematic that they need them gone. Now, a certain group would like for us to believe this, but we don’t have any actual proof of ANY of this narrative. That all said, we have to revert back to what we know and what we’ve been told. Which is confusing.
So. I’ve rambled again. And repeated myself in some contexts 😂 but I think I made my point? (If not I’ll obviously come up with more shit later 😂😂)
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mistriavalley · 2 days ago
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Alex with an insecure chubby farmer (gn!farmer)
Note: Got this idea from @hermits-crab. I also had sm fun writing this! I struggle a lot with my own body image so writing these headcanons brought me some comfort :3
TW: negative body image, negative comments from the past, farmer is insecure, mentions of bullying from the past
Masterlist
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Alex has never and will never give you any reason to feel insecure or self conscious about your body. He worships not only you, but the ground you walk on as well and he honestly would have never thought that you'd feel bad about your looks. You're perfect in his eyes. Godlike even
But while he rolls out the red carpet for you, you still can't help yourself. Alex is so athletic and fit and you feel like people are judging you for being on the bigger side. Of course no one has ever said anything regarding that in Pelican Town. On the contrary, when you confided in Haley she praised you and your figure
You still can't help, but to wonder what his friends in the city or from gridball practice might be saying when Alex shows them pictures of you though. Are they saying "you lucky bastard" or "as long as you're happy"? It's eating you up from the inside, but you don't wanna bother your partner with that
And when you guys go on a date or shopping in the city, do the people around you actually stare at you and whisper amongst themselves or are you just imagining it? Nevertheless, the thought alone that someone might be judging you makes you wrap your arms around yourself to hide
It takes an embarrassingly long time for Alex to notice anything and even then he only does, because it's painfully obvious in that moment. Like you're out on a beach date and you refuse to get out of your baggy t-shirt even though you're obviously suffering from the scorching heat. That's when it clicks inside his head and his heart breaks
He walks you back to your farm after the beach date and sits down with you to talk about it. He wants you to trust him with these things and for you to know that you can talk to him about anything. When he hears how worried you are about what others might think when they see "someone like him" with "someone like you" he grabs both your hands and squeezes them gently
After he asks why you'd worry about such a thing, you explain how you've gotten comments thrown at you in the past and how every single one stuck with you to this day. It makes him angry and he wishes he would have met you sooner so he could punch every single person who has made you feel bad
Alex knows what it's like though. His father has made him feel like shit his entire childhood, but you've helped him get rid of these negative thoughts and he wants to do the same for you. There is obviously no pressure, because he understands that you can't shake these chains off in one day, but he'll do everything to make you feel loved and appreciated
That evening and every single one afterwards, he leads you to bed where he showers every inch of your body with kisses and praises. Also due to him working out so much and his lifestyle in general, he knows a lot about the human body. So if you stumble upon a "fitness guru" online talking about how unhealthy it is to do this or look like that, Alex is jumping in immediately to correct the person before it gets to your head
"But my BMI-" "No. Don't. BMI is a faulty system in more ways than just one. I'm not in the green area either, because of the weight from my muscles."
Or when he notices that you refuse to get a second serving even though you're still hungry or when you decide not to order a desert when you clearly want one. "You have to eat if you're hungry, baby. You're doing hard physical work on your farm every single day and your body needs the energy."
"I've gained weight again..." "Baby, listen to me. I'm 100%- no 500% certain that those are just muscles. You're lifting, pushing and pulling stuff on your farm from morning to evening. It's fine. You are fine."
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theramblergal · 2 days ago
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Do you have any thoughts on Karenumati and Vijaya?
PS: I love your writing!!!
SO many thoughts!
Karenumati:
Baby.
No, seriously, she's the baby of the PandavaParivaara.
Pampered daughter, definitely. I like to think Shishupala loved his daughter very much, it adds complexities (TM) to their relationship.
She's also pampered by her sisters-in-law/brothers-in-law and Mata Kunti ALL THE TIME. (She feels a bit suffocated at times.)
She fell madly in love with Nakula when she was pretty young, and Shishupala was loathe to deny his daughter anything so he proposed a marriage alliance when she was old enough.
I headcanon her as a curious person. She wants to know the why and the how of everything and anything under the sun. Combine this with the indulgence of literally everyone around her: she asks WAY too many questions (and not always the most tactful ones).
She feels like a replacement many times. When she was younger it stemmed from Shishupala's side glances when he was in a sullen mood (she wondered if he ever thought of his imagined children with Rukmini and judged her wanting); sometimes in Indraprastha she feels like a side-piece, a little ornament that is handled with too much care and only put on display for people to fawn over.
Other than Sahadeva, she gets along with Yudhishthira the most out of all her brothers-in-law. Surprising? Maybe. Despite the wide age gap, Yudhishthira's kindness does not feel indulging; no matter how many questions she asks, he always answers patiently.
Nakula takes her on the best outings and always treats her devastatingly romantically. She loves it, but sometimes she provokes arguments with him just to feel a little bit older.
She desperately wants to understand Rukmini better, but after seeing her father for so many years, she cannot help the distance that is between them every time they meet. But ater Shishupala's death, she breaks down in Rukmini's arms.
She is the stricter parent when it comes to raising Niramitra, having experienced how too much indulgence can spoil you.
She enjoys spending the most time with the kids in Indraprastha (or anywhere else, really) because they only know her as someone older than them and they will treat her with respect because of it.
Krishnaa and Vijayaa are also two of the few people who give her due accord and treat her like an equal. While everyone else do try their best and pull it off most of the time, Renu does feel like they still think of her as a child/younger so they are less likely to treat her as older.
Vijayaa:
I like to call her the Tinkerer.
Hehe. But yes, to me, Vijayaa rarely has need for words because she is always busy tinkering with something, taking it apart or fixing it.
Her hands are never still; they're always busy with some object or the other. If there's nothing in her hands, she cannot keep them still and it's a tic of hers to constantly fidget.
Even while she's in court, she'll be poking at something or the other, and everyone smiles fondly at her.
So. She rarely speaks, much like Sahadeva. She has a soft, lilting voice that can carry across an audience, however, and the kids will often run to her with requests for bedtime stories.
She and Sahadeva loved each other since they were young teenagers, and they would steal time together on his visits to Madra. It wasn't even a question of who she would choose in her svayamvara ceremony.
Her family would tease her about not needing to hold a svayamvara and skip directly to the marriage directly, but she held her ground firmly on wanting a svayamvara for the kingdom's sake.
Their love is quiet but no less passionate than their siblings' more fiery, whirlwind romances. Vijayaa knows she'll always have someone to speak all her unspoken thoughts to in Sahadeva; and Sahadeva knows Vijayaa will always sit in him with silence for hours or days if need be.
She takes Karenumati under her wing when she arrives at Indraprastha, recognizing her need to prove herself and a person to express herself freely with.
Her love language is gifting others; she makes the most beautiful things with her own hands and gifts them to all her family members. She's always working on passion projects; Sahadeva brings back interesting knick-knacks from the corners of the country when he's out travelling because he knows what she likes.
She didn't have many friends in her childhood despite being one of Madra's princesses, because she was too quiet and too absorbed in the works of her hands. The other noble daughters would frequently tease her for this, but she never paid them much heed.
One of her works that she's most proud of is the intricate gold bangles she crafted from scratch for Krishnaa when she gave birth to Shrutasena. Krishnaa never takes them off. (Not even during the Dyuta, I would like to say.)
She tries her best to see Lakshmanaa at least once a year, which is no hardship considering how often the Yadavas visit Indraprastha or the other way around, and frequently writes long letters to her cousin.
That's about it for now, I think? That was long. But I do love the PandavaPatnis.
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emmanuellececchi · 3 days ago
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You are right. We don't hear, and we don't know much about training at all. Where it is done? How it is handle? So it is difficult to estimate if, yes or no, women were part of a regular training. I guess the way I saw it comes from the fact we never hear about any women anywhere near the army, or in any conversation. But, on the other hand as you pointed out, if it was something known and accepted, why would they speak about it?
As for Thèoden, would he even know about it? We don't know if he does visit and check on the army/eored training. It might not be his role and he could leave that to each commander/leader. Or, as you said, he might hear about it but might not want to intervene... or do not think it would ever come to use... Then maybe this is why he asks only for men (once again my brain overthinking something based on nothing XD).
As for Eomer, maybe it is the way it is written in the french version, or I mixed up both book and movie, but I always thought it wasn't something that he knew about his sister. And Gandalf talk as well let me think he had no idea of her desires... But I agree his main surprise in Pelennor was to find her here rahter than in Rohan.
But, on the other hand, if he knew she could fight and trained as such, why not understand her worries, her need? Maybe because he wants to protect her and avoid seeing her in battle. I am not trying to say Eomer is to blame or anything. I just wonder if Eomer was really knowledgeable about Eowyn's training and her capacity.
And don't worry, @from-the-coffee-shop-in-edoras, I always hope to have your opinion. I do not know as much as you on Rohan Lore and I was curious about your thoughts on everything, so thank you for sharing and showing other points here and there that I didn't see.
Finally, this from @dilettantefeminist
Who among the horse people will write the fic where the women of Rohan have a secret fight club and that is how they learned? 🤔
The first rule of Fight Club is: you do not talk about Fight Club. SEowyn knew and had swear secret to not let anyone know. Now imagine, all the women of this club are here on the Pelennor field and they found Eowyn and they don't want the guys to know so they decide to take care of her and carry her, discreetly, letting other people think she's dead so that they can take care of her secretly (I am going out of control sorry). And then Imrahil arrives and wonders why those guys are not able to see she is alive, while actually they know and want to bring her somewhere else....
Anyway... who's going to write this for us? 😆
Defending the castle like a man...
I've just read this article : Defending the castle like a man: on belligerent medieval ladies.
One of my friend is practicing HEMA (historical european martial art) as well as forging. We speak often about it and I have many question, mostly because of my main character in my medieval romance. As in forging, strength is not all in fighting. Know how to do it and practicing is first and foremost (she is smaller and thinner than me. she can wield swords that I cannot lift).
She reads lots of things about medieval warfare and we have discussion about it, and more recently because of my main character in my medieval romance. She had send me this article. And while reading it, I thought about some of my mutuals and the quite recent discussion about Eowyn and Théoden. So this is for you : @torchwood-99 , @from-the-coffee-shop-in-edoras , @konartiste. @errruvande I thought about you as there is a good reference about Alfred's daughter.
Reading this, I thought about Théoden. Rohan seems to have a certain history of female fighters. Shieldmaiden is not a name coming out of nowhere. So... what led Rohan to, seemingly, forget about this role? When did it happen?
In this article, there are a lot of example of women who did fight in war and defend their territory. It seems there are more and more proof of that. Even more, it seems women were actually expected to know at least how to defend their castle and lands. "Do as their husband do". So they had to know how to fight or at least strategies and siege... And some knew how to use bows, crossbows and even swords. Still, they had been, most of the time, erased or played down.
It is not said if this erasing was all along or more recent, as it is noted that those women of war were common up until the 14th centuries. In any case, they existed, but in later ages, it was inconvenient for men to have their female kin show "men's virtue".
Did something equivalent happened in Rohan? Why would something like this would happen? I would be the first to say "Oh it's all Saruman/Grima's fault". But no. Theoden do not think of sending Eowyn to war. He does not even have the reflex to think about her as a leader for his people. if it had been Grima and/or Saruman, he would have think about it.
Could it be his gondorian upbringing? After all he grew up in Gondor, had a gondorian mother? Thengel did not seem to held his countries culture in high regard. So, could it be this? Or even before that?
In my glèomenn fanfic, Tirwald said it was legends and old story. Could it be even older? Something more recent, linked to another culture?
So... What do you think?
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cocolacola · 2 years ago
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wow seras really is just the autism ever
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ashironie · 20 hours ago
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reblogging bcs i have a lot of thoughts
i fucking HATED how Jon treated him s1, we also have to remember that before we see ANYTHING of Martin straight from the horses mouth, we see him from Jon’s pov. And Martin probably wasn’t very good at his job, but that’s reasonable since he transferred from the library to an archive, he most certainly didn’t expect to be in research 2.0. Martin has no clue how to do his job and he couldn’t let anyone know that because he wasn’t even supposed to be there. The reason i started liking Martin was because i hated Jon, and the reason i hated Jon was because he was mean to Martin. My thought process was thus; Jon’s an Ass to Martin for really no reason, so I’m going to like Martin to spite Jon
Now, i too sorta dislike s5 Martin, when i first listened i found him to be really whiny and kinda ungrateful. During my relisten a lot of the problems i had with him were lessened because i was just so unuse to this new Martin, and before, he would do everything I would, but now he was a lot different, which gave me whiplash. it’s like expecting the driver in a car to take a turn and then they just don’t, you can’t blame them but there’s a sense of wrongness in your stomach. Now again most of these problems i had were fixed when i relistened, knowing what was going to happen, and that was my main complaint with s5 in general, expecting a turn and the driver just keeps going straight
Now going back to s1 (since i realized i didn’t explain my point very well). When ever Jon talked about what Martin did it was heavily biased, and whenever we hear Martin talk it’s around Jon. Around the person he doesn’t want to get in trouble by. We heard in the beginning of s5 tapes that Sasha and Tim were a lot different then when being recorded in s1, so obviously Martin (with a more easily identifiable reason) would also be a lot different. Then when everything went down and he dropped the act a little, we do know he was still acting. The tapes we get in s3 before the Unknowing are the closest thing we get to him being genuine, and even still he doesn’t want to admit how much of an asshole he is.
Now it’s fine if you don’t like Martin, he’s specifically written as a very complex person, and that means that sometimes people just hate him for no reason. But I dislike the criticism that his personality was very touch and go, it’s just that we didn’t know what was actually going on in his head until end of s4 and s5.
Now my defense of why I like Martin is;
He has a very heavy faun response, which same, and that aspect makes him really interesting to me. Being manipulative and having a heavy faun response are the same, but are seen differently.
i detest the idea that he is never in the wrong or that he’s just a sweet cinnamon roll. Martin, early on, just follows the lead to anyone who makes it seem like they understand even a little, then does a full 180 into thinking he knows what’s right and wrong without any input from anyone. Then realizes that, he really doesn’t know, nobody does, and he still thinks he knows better more often than not, but he recognizes this in himself. There is no ends to anyone’s character arcs in TMA, they still grow and struggle with the same things, but they find new solutions and new problems. And i think all of that is really interesting! It adds to the tragedy, it’s fine if a character dies when they are finished atoning for whatever narrative sin they have be set up with, but it’s tragic when they never get to! They are told what they need to do, and try to do it, but die before they can. Sasha died before she could be anything but a memory, someone who almost just haunts the narrative. Tim died in a noble way, but ultimately pointless one, as we come to find out. He is still just as angry, and he still didn’t bring the two people he wanted to save back from the dead. He didn’t win, even if he and everyone else thought so. He could’ve healed, but he killed himself before he could. And Martin tries like hell to figure out how to listen to people without only listening to him, and he fails a lot, a LOT a lot. But he died before he could just relax. Jon was the same, he got too deep and thought that, with enough time, he could figure out a way, not out of the hole, but closer to the surface. And he would’ve, if given the time. But he was dragged back into the same bullshit by the same man and by the same fear.
sorry that one was a lot longer but yk.
Martin is also stubborn. He was endlessly patient with Jon early s5, and the idea that he’s impatient the rest of the season i disagree with. He is just very careful with what he gives his time, maybe a bit to careful, but again with him over-course correcting. But he is still very stubborn, which i feel like is a good word between perseverance and determination. He knows that they will find a way to get everyone safe, as much as possible. He is too patient to believe the easy answer, and too persistent to allow everyone else to settle for that either. He does dumb things sometimes, but when has a tma character not? but is still fiercely protective of his people and ideals. if not a bit misguided at times
I'll be so honest with y'all, I always thought Martin was written to be an intentionally dislikeable character (like s1 Jon) for like character development or something, and then I was even MORE sure of that by season 5, and then they just kinda never touched on it and the fandom was all obsessing over him and it's like?? What do y'all see in him unless you relate to him omg 😨
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loderlied · 7 months ago
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mmm essay about sally and kid gort in the tags (cw for child abuse, mentions of suicide, animal cruelty and a murder attempt. i always hope i don’t have to say this but just in case: i don’t excuse or condone any of her or gort’s behaviour at all.) this is literally not even touching upon everything i have to say because i hit the fucking tag limit lmao. NOBODY READ IT’S BAD BRAINSTORMING I JUST NEEDED TO GET IT OUT SOMEHOW
#thinkin too much about gortie side characters again.#sally this time and why she specifically talks about him the way she does#like dravo is obviously still shitty but to me he was. ‘just ‘neglectful#while sally actively hated and even felt terrorised by her own child#like. it’s not like i don’t understand her at all.#imagine you and your love don’t have much besides each other and your shop and you get pregnant and ready to raise a child#only for it to not be a child he didn’t and doesn’t cry ever and he learns everything so much sooner than most but then he never calls you#his parents and it’s not just a petty thing kids do sometimes you feel that he doesn’t see you as family and the worst part is that you#agree deep down#and as he gets older he doesn’t have any friends and actively rejects the notion of the entire concept#but then as time passes you hear about how he has entire groups of children following him and then several of them commit suicide#and that thing coming to sit with you and dravo at the dinner table says that he did what you did last week when the axe to chop wood broke#and you discarded it and got a new one#and he has these habits of ripping out flowers and making sure that they don’t regrow#and then you hear rumours about a friend’s daughter’s cat disappearing and think nothing of it#until you visit his tree house a month later and find a declawed cat and birds with clipped wings and crushed bugs that he keeps fondly#and then you see him with other children and they don’t know and his face is different and body language is entirely different#and were it not for the fact that you know better you would never see anything but a normal child#and you know that you are one who painstakingly brought this thing that should not be into the world and so you decide to end it all one da#and go to him as he’s asleep with the knife shaking in your hand#but he cries when you’re above him! screams at the top of his lungs!#so you beg for forgiveness even though you don’t deserve it through tears but as soon as the knife is put away you see the act drop and fee#his clever fingers having twisted your brain inside and out and you know that you can do nothing#and so the opportunity arises to at least remove him out of your life if not everyone’s lives and you take it immediately.#but you heard him talk. how he will close his fist around the world one day. and you know that it is not a matter of if but when.#like. imagine that. jesus dude.#like i hc her as someone that is messy and does not know a lot about life and she certainly wouldn’t have been a good mother but the love#or at least desire to love is there somewhere. and believing that having a child is really the only somewhat meaningful thing she can do#with her life. she’s not some hero or rich or anything of note. so there’s a lot obligation and not genuine desire for family here.#but she never really got the chance to be an actual mother in the first place so. who knows what that might have looked like
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caeslxys · 4 months ago
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"I’ve seen a lot of people say that the Hells will side with the gods and I don’t think I agree. Especially as Imogen has been scolded and villainized over and over for daring to try and save her mother—who herself has been seen by some as an irredeemable evil in spite of her drive being the exact same—her family—but when it’s the Gods it’s justified? When it’s the Gods, it’s sympathetic? Too sympathetic to criticize further than “they’re family”?"
good meta op, but i'm slightly confused about this part. are you talking of the fandom here or the narrative? because from what i've seen and remember, imogen has definitely been scolded or villanized as you say, by the fandom, but has she been treated that way by the hells or anyone else? i guess keyleth comes to mind, but apart from that, the hells seemed supportive of her wanting to reach out and reconcile with her mom.
Prefacing what i'm sure will be an overly long mostly tangent: you obviously do not have to agree with my interpretations of any scene I'm about to bring up and if you don't sick cool please do not make it a problem
A bit of both, to be honest! The use of the word “villainizing” was definitely more geared toward fandom response, but Imogen has absolutely been scolded—or maybe shamed is the better word—in campaign several times! Yes by Keyleth threatening her in front of them all just for being ruidusborn and related to Liliana, but also by Orym in particular several times.
Which is not to say that Orym doesn’t want Imogen to save her mother—obviously he does!—but it has definitely been more than once that he has shut down her grief and her processing her relationship with her mother by inserting his own grief over it, notably in the immediate aftermath of Ruidus and convo with Liliana.
(Which, yes, he immediately apologized for, but I do find it interesting that Imogen got shit from fandom for her response in the scene I'm about to bring up in episode 49 for EVER but no one was allowed to criticize Orym's response as impulsive and insensitive there and he notably was not disassociating or being actively manipulated. Just think it's interesting!)
And while it wasn’t nearly so livid in it’s delivery, that moment in 49 where she was just trying to process seeing her mother and speaking with her and being presented with the idea of peace for the first time in her life was delivered (though you could argue this wasn’t his intent; honestly I don’t think it was, but—) in a way that immediately had her plummeting into self-deprecating apologies for being effectively manipulated. I’ve actually written a bit before about how I find the youth of his grief making it more volatile in comparison to the rest of the hells’ grief deeply compelling as a thematic beat!
That’s a bit of a tangent just bc I find specifically the dynamic between Orym/Imogen/Liliana to be a very compelling one lmao but even in the Uthodurn arc with Chetney insight checking her to see if she was telling the truth or not about her intentions with her mother. Or Fearne bringing up to Orym (also back in 49) the question of what they planned to do with/to her if she turned. It's not that I think, necessarily, that those were ill intentioned but they were coming from a place of, at best, mistrust specifically because of her connection to Liliana. Really only Ashton and Laudna—and FCG, funnily enough—have not in some way taken her grief and yearning and turned against her when it comes to placing their trust in her (whether she was aware they did so or not), which of course speaks to a certain interpretation they had of her character at the time.
And, also, this has obviously since changed and most of them mostly understand where she’s coming from now—especially Orym!—but it doesn’t make the fact that it happened any less true!
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hajihiko · 2 years ago
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yeah that!
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asteria-argo · 9 months ago
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correct me if I'm wrong but I was just thinking about the roykeeley in season two of it all, and that fight where Keeley loses it at Roy for being clingy because she can't handle how close they are now that they work in the same building but like,,, Keeley and Roy would have been working in the same building while dating for a good chunk of season one as well.
She started working at Nelson Road before Jamie was even sent back to Manchester. They would of had months working in the same building, so either Roy has always been that clingy and Keeley just didn't mind at first, which I found doubtful given that it only takes her like a week to blow up at him for it in season two, or Roy being clingy is an out of character thing for him to be doing that should've raised some kind of red flag to friends and loved ones that I feel like from what we know about Keeley as a character would've been treated with more empathy than she actually had in the show.
#i'm going off of memory so this might not be anything#but wasn't one of her complaints that he sat quietly in her office reading when they were on break?#girl how is that being clingy and not just regular levels of wanting to spend time with your partner?#I stand by that Roy wasn't in the wrong for that#I actually stand by Roy not being in the wrong for MOST of his relationship with Keeley#I don't even think he was wrong for breaking up with her#I will not ever view breaking off a relationship you aren't happy in as selfish#and I don't care how much the show tries to make me view him as selfish for it or like he threw something good away#no he didn't#just because Keeley was hurt by being broken up with (understandable reaction) does not mean Roy did the wrong thing by breaking up with he#he looked at the way their relationship was going and saw that he wouldn't be happy if he stayed so he left#and the show tried to frame that as a bad thing#“maybe i should've just stuck around and enjoyed it”#no sir that's not how these things work#staying in a failing relationship just because you don't want to be alone isn't healthy you did the right thing#your career and your love life aren't metaphors for each other#and let me be clear Roy and Keeley were 100% a failing relationship right from the start of season 2 with the fight that inspired this post#keeley's feelings about the breakup aren't more valid then Roy's just because she's the hurt party#and they clearly broke up amicably if Keeley is willing to sit down and tell Phoebe about it with him#she wasn't jilted or wronged in any way and the show framing it like that grinds my fucking gears
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lixies-favorite-cookie · 4 days ago
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rant in the tags because im feeling shitty and I have no other friends to rant to
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quietwingsinthesky · 2 months ago
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sometimes i think about my spn oc and how i rewrote everything about amara to interact with the story i was trying to tell about her. there were some really neat ideas in that i need to recycle for something one day. like, in the show proper, they just let amara take over a human baby and that’s fine, but amara’s not Meant To Be Here. this entire universe is one constructed in her absence. saying she can possess a human body should be like saying if you took a person and sent them to a universe where 1+1=3, they could just figure out how to function within that.
which in story took the form of Amara being something that could not be Understood, only Rationalized. a force locked outside the narrative who could only get inside and destroy things if given a role within it. by the Winchesters as A Monster To Face. by Chuck as Wayward, Unreachable Sister. and by miss oc as. simultaneously a projected creature to be saved, an amalgamation of injustices done to herself (and others) that would never be righted but could be made up for by being a part of this. and as something impossibly powerful that could be both protection and purpose.
and the Darkness wasn’t any of those things, really, but to have agency in her own story required new shackles, but ones she was always straining against. she wouldn’t fit inside the confines of a human mind, let alone a body, at least not well enough to leave it Intact. like lucifer burning through nick, but Worse. because the burns were an expected outcome of skin not strong enough to hold him. humans were built for angels, some were built better and some worse, but they’re meant to work. putting amara in human skin should disconnect the skin and mind and soul from the reality her brother built itself, i think. slowly. bit by bit.
and at the same time, i’d gone and written the kind of wild scenario you really can only write for your thirteen year old mary sue, given that spn oc the part of herald/high priestess/failed vessel. which she pursued with wild abandon like that would fix anything wrong with her <3
in the end, running alongside the borrowed family theming of the original show was my own theme of “how much self-annihilation will you accept to make your point. are you accepting it, really. or are you seeking it.” not just physically, in letting something unmake the base components of what you are as it tries to fit inside you or in it constricting and suffocating itself beyond self-recognition to get inside in the first place, but, obviously, it’s supernatural, how much selfhood do you cede to your family. is it worth it.
it was interesting, if nothing else. let thirteen year old me cook. she had ideas.
#spn oc#don’t mind this i’m rambling about nothing i felt nostalgic about her (<- my oc)#there was also an explanation in the mix for why amara was called amara in this au too despite. you know. not being a baby.#and it was like. a vessel’s desperate attempt to separate itself from the thing inside it by naming it something other than itself.#like a last moment of self-preservation. the opposite of lucifer using nick’s face and us all agreeing to think of it as his. you know?#and amara means beauty.#it’s a very human need. to name things. and the thing is that humanity itself is antithetical to what amara is. in this au.#not because of any inherent quality of it. but because it was not made with her in mind.#i keep bringing up lucifer but he’s such a good comparison case of what thirteen year old me was trying to construct here#and what i can better explain now that im. not thirteen. but its that. lucifer has beef with humans because they have common ground.#the only reason he can hate them is because they’re recognizable to him. terrible little cockroaches. but something he understands.#amara as i conceived of her could not hate or love or understand humanity. or the world. or anything as we know it. because it was not made#to be seen by her. it was made with the express purpose of her never encountering it.#when i was thirteen i wanted her to be so much more alien than she was. unfortunately this is supernatural and supernatural deals in#Just Some Guy forever and ever <3#but it was my story so i made her fucked up and weird and beyond comprehension.#except. of course. when forced to bend into a shape that makes her Not her.#i don’t think proper envesseling would have been a process either her or the oc survived. not because they’d die but because they’d get.#stuck? i think? that was what the intent was. that they’d get melted together like plastic toys.#chuck had a nice smooth envesseling in this au because these toys are made for him.#and angels need consent and angels get bleedover from their vessels because the toys are shared with them but they’re closer to being toys#themselves too.#i’ve rambled enough honestly no one cares about this but me aksjfkjfks#what was i talking about. right! the naming!#the naming of amara is a nail in her coffin because she is named and it is so human to be named and to be perceived and to be shaped by that#perception. even without malicious intent. even to be looked at as destruction itself and be named beauty.#in the same way you kill what something could be by learning what it is. the way a unicorn dies when you discover how rhinos were drawn.#does that make sense? that’s what kills her. bit by bit.
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fireheartedpup · 2 months ago
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My parents like to do this thing where they invite me over, don't specify a specific time, don't text until the time they expect me to be there, and then ask why I got there late.
I'm not gonna let it get to me today but it still sucks.
#personal#me: don't get mad at me if you don't specify a time and then i don't show up when you want me to#dad: don't put this on me#of course he'd been drinking#they don't wait for me#he's the one who suggested dinner and then they ate before i got there#i got there at 6:30 btw.#it's not like they said come for dinner and i showed up at 8#i want my mom but she's the reason i want my mom#like it was decent this time and we're qll getting better#but she doesn't come in to see me or eat anything with me and then when i leave she says she barely saw me#I've been here!#i was eating in the kitchen!#where i usually eat!#okay so it's getting to me a little.#took some of it home#dad: invites me for dinner#also dad: did you come over to raid the fridge?#family really is a sour sweet commercial#like how was i ever expected to have normal relationships when this is what I'm used to#I'm trying to be better with my dog because my patience can run out real quick and I'm like COME ON#I try to take a deep breath and remember that she waits on me for like half her life#the puppy is getting bigger and more energetic and I'm like “if he keeps doing that she's going to get worse” (dog reactive)#mom: she's fine#she is getting better but her tail was tucked and she told him off because he got in her face#he does NOT understand the concept of another dog not wanting to play#it's going okay. we're mostly keeping them separated.#my parents just don't take my concerns seriously for some fucking reason
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