#she is way too fucking nice because she Chooses to reincarnate everyone

[whippedcloudsofcream]

Sailor Moon S1E44

[acerikus]

Uh random headcanons for Flowey Undertale Baldr KH and Volo Pokemon!

Oooh some good ones 👁️👄👁️

Flowey (gonna go w some post pacifist headcanons mostly I think)

It takes him a really long time before he feels like he can be open with anyone, but he's working on it. It's always far easier to lash out rather than to process anything he's been through, but he'll get there.

He has genuine respect for papyrus and is one of the few people who understand his brand of humour and sarcasm. Part of his distaste for sans stems from thinking he babies him too much.

Even if other characters eventually learn that he used to be Asriel, he's very firm in the fact that he doesn't want to be referred to with that name again. He's feels so far divorced from who he used to be that he basically considers it his deadname and everyone respects that. Once he starts to learn how to live with himself that hasn't changed, but he sees it as a fresh start with a new name and another chance to try to make it up to everyone.

Flowey and Suzy (assuming she's Susie's undertale counterpart) get along like a house on fire. They like yelling and swearing and giggling about violence together. Frisk has their work cut out with these two.

Flowey really wants to imitate Chara's creepy faces so, so badly.

Anything he does to scare people is 100% projection, he just thinks of things he knew HE used to be scared of (or still is!)

Baldr

Despite his own insecurities with his darkness, Baldr tried his absolute hardest to stay positive and fight for his friends. He was completely genuine in saying he wanted to become a master to protect those he loved, but he was failed by the system so much that it just wasn't enough.

Him and Hodor tried to pretend to have the perfect sibling dynamic, but deep down they both felt how flawed it was. He knew he'd never have her light, and she knew he'd be taken by the darkness eventually. In the end, it sort of became a self fulfilling prophecy.

He's definitely a descendant of ephemer. Extremely distantly mind, but he'd end up on that side of the missing link blood feud for sure.

Riku is absolutely either part of the same bloodline as him or his reincarnation lol

He KNOWS the irony of his name, and he thinks it fucking sucks

Him and Xehanort were great friends before everything kicked off, probably him and Vör too. It's part of why he saved them for last (vör was admittedly more luck that he appreciated, and eraqus lasted so long bc he wanted xehanort to have to watch the boy he liked die lol)

The darkness that took over him wasn't capital D darkness. It was his own plaguing him - all his darkest thoughts and most negative emotions rather than any kind of outside entity. Probably still some kinda Evil Magic sprinkled in there and influence from the general force of darkness, but no direct possession. He probably could've been saved if he wasn't abandoned in a room alone for over a goddamn week.

Before All That, his friends always tease him about being a total weenie. Scary stories freak him out and Hodor makes sure he had a night light so he doesn't get too scared after Bragi whips out some of his spookiest tales. He feels faint at the sight of blood.

Whenever they go anywhere chilly, he's the most likely to be unaffected. His jacket is nice and toasty :]

He's... Not great at magic, and tends to avoid it. He especially sucks at healing magic.

Volo

He sees his pokemon as tools, but unlike some of the other villains his mentality towards them is 'Pokemon are weapons, but weapons must be maintained and taken care of'. He looks after his pokemon diligently and showers them with affection - it's much better in the long run.

All of his pokemon absolutely LOVE him. This also applies to Giratina, there's no way the big silly dragon doesn't adore this man.

All his pokemon have the serious nature in canon and I choose to believe it's specifically because he fed them those mints for modifying natures. No silliness in HIS battalion!

Cogita is DEFINITELY his aunt imo.

I see a lot of people hc that he'd hate Cynthia and everything she stands for, but I think he'd be extremely proud of her. The reason he's Like That is implied to be bc he's had a rough time w life, and I think he'd be delighted to see how much fear and respect Cynthia emanates and just how much power she holds over Sinnoh - and that she doesn't NEED to remake the world to live a good life. AND she's met arceus! His bloodline succeeded in everything he truly wanted in life and I think he'd be satisfied with that.

Volo is immortal and keeps an eye on things from a distance. After leaving hisui, he takes some time to reflect and educates his descendants on his mistakes so this never happens again. He's probably gone after Enamorus, Xerneas AND Celebi before for the sake of his lifespan. The reason Giratina sometimes hangs around with Cynthia is bc he asked them to watch over her.

Alternately: Cynthia is his reincarnation rather than his descendant, explaining why there's seemingly two Cynthia ancestors instead of one. Big fan of this one.

Different alternative: Volo is immortal and also trans. She's actually just Cynthia. Since she calmed down and stopped trying to remake the world, Cogita has been helping her cover her tracks for years so nobody realises she's not aged.

With either of the last two, Arceus appearing to Cynthia in hgss is a really big fucking deal. Cynthia's proven herself worthy of their respect and trust.

[ktheist]

life is yours

muses. professor!fiancee!namjoon x reader x fiancee’s friend!past life husband! expecting father!yoongi

genre. reincarnation au. college au. pregnancy au.

word. 1.7k

x

you loved min yoongi, you’d die for him.

and died for him you did. when the traitors came for your king, you’d leaped in front of him and took a swing of the treacherous sword. history books portrayed him as the king who went mad. the king who slayed hundreds of lives in one night and ruled for fifty more years as a tyrant.

what are histories if not painted with a tragic romance?

they said it was because of you he went mad. because he lost his queen, his breath.

a few hundred years later, he’d found her again. at the age of twenty-seven and you, twenty-two.

his girlfriend was pregnant with his baby and you were professor kim namjoon’s student-turned-fiance.

“it’s funny, you know,” you took a whiff of the cigarette and breathe out through your mouth, “we can walk out of our current relationships and ruin everyone’s perception of us, or we can just lead the life we’re living like we didn’t remember anything.”

yoongi squints his eyes as he stares up at the sun. lips tucked downwards, as though telling the universe that after one lifetime too many, he’s unimpressed.

“or we could just run away,” he recalls the flames of the torches of that night - not as bright as today’s sun but just as mocking, “forget about everything and run away.”

“you make it sound so easy,” a laugh escapes your smoke kissed lips, “it’s not as if the people we’ve known and loved are fake, faceless puppets.”

this life is just as real.

though it would’ve gone much different if you’d met each other sooner.

yoongi taps the pointed corner of the invitation card on his palm. it tickles but it’s nothing compared to the burning sensation as he held onto the handle of the sword despite it grazing his flesh.

“how far along is she?” his girlfriend, you mean. 

walking into namjoon’s office - the office you’d snuck into a few times too many but felt utterly alien - you saw the porcelain, snow-kissed complexion of your king. all at once, the memories hit you like a rain of shards.

and in each, individual shard, you see the images of your first step, first drawing, first embroidery and the first time you met yoongi. an arrogant boy whom you pushed into the koi pond.

the same boy who smirked at you the whole time during your engagement ceremony while you squirmed in your seat, scheming a runway and an apology at the same time.

and the man who strutted into the room, plopped on the left side of the bed and bade you good night on your first night as a married couple.

it was until three months later, that you trapped him under you and confronted him about it.

you thought yoongi, the crown prince turned king, had a lover. but he loved you too much to hurt you. they said you’re supposed to bleed on your first time. you laughed until your stomach hurt because you were happy beyond words that your husband was abstaining himself for you and not going around fucking a lover behind your back.

not even a year later, you caressed your stomach and giggled to yourself, thinking about yoongi’s stone cold expression turning pink and speechless. that night, the rebellion happened.

your last memories was of him holding you in his arms and calling out your name. 

in this lifetime, your first memory of him is watching him smile a familiar smile that screamed awkwardness as namjoon relayed their youthful tales.

that was, until he got to the part where yoongi’s about to be a father.

all of a sudden, there’s a knot in your stomach. it twists and tightens until you feel like you’re going to puke if you didn’t excuse yourself, saying something about calling your mom that you’d be having dinner with namjoon and letting the two men catch up.

“ten weeks. we’re ten weeks pregnant,” he sucks in a deep, agonized breath - and from the way he’s gazing up at the sky with his hands on his hips, you don’t think he meant to hide his afflictions.

the way he refers to himself and her as ‘we’ makes that knot all the more painful.

“i was a seven weeks pregnant,” you smile softly to yourself, gazing down at your stomach as if you could feel your baby from your previous lifetime.

you shouldn’t have said it.

should’ve just kept quiet.

but-

“they told me you were eight weeks in,” the soft, breathless tone that comes from yoongi is  what makes your heart beat again.

as if you’d come to life. as if min ___, the queen of joseon had come back to tell her king the one thing she wished to say. the one thing she wished for.

a family.

“taeyang. i was going to name him taeyang because he was going to be the sun of the dynasty and bring peace to the nation,” you laugh and it’s the choked up sound that you make that makes you realize you’re on the verge of crying.

“never thought i’d be talking about histories and dynasties with anyone - i hate history,” the confession slips out of you like you’re talking with an old friend. someone you trust wholeheartedly. someone you know you can confide in. 

yoongi was your friend, your lover, your king.

“come with me. i have a savings account, we can start anew somewhere, we can have what we couldn’t have back then.” he turns to you and looks at you in the eye. 

“what about your baby?” you ask because you know it’s meant for his future family.

“i’ll send child support every month,” he says.

“your parents?” you ask because his mother was a concubine and the king barely remembered his name out of the names of his many children.

in this lifetime, from the way namjoon candidly told the story, you know they love their eldest son as much as he loves them.

“they’ll adore you,” he says.

“no one’s gonna love a homewr- ah,” you hiss, dropping the cigarette that was trapped between your fingers until it burned your skin.

“___,” a familiar, deep but less gravelly tone reverberates against the walls as namjoon comes jogging at you like you’re a kid who just bruised her knee.

you study his face and yoongi’s eyes burn holes in your head.

from the way he meets your gaze and gives you ‘your fingers almost got burned and you’re looking at me?’ you think it’s safe to say that he didn’t hear what you were saying.

“i’m fine, i just burned my fingers because i got too engulfed in yoongi’s stories about how you two met,” you laugh at how namjoon’s inspecting your fingers more attentively than a doctor would.

“another reason to include in the long list of reasons not to smoke,” your finacee chides.

“that was my last,” you announce in a higher pitch than your usual voice - and that’s how namjoon knows you’re half-joking, even when you- “i promise.”

“anyways,” you place the injured hand on his chest to distract him - the way yoongi’s jaw tighten doesn’t go past you, “i talked to my dad because apparently my mom was cooking and couldn’t come to the phone and he said to tell you to bring me back before curfew.”

it’s the way namjoon freezes underneath your touch, his eyes blinking once and his soul retreating far back into his subconscious that makes you giggle.

“i’m kidding.”

only then, does he breathe again.

“my mom wasn’t cooking, she was watching her favorite show,” you say again.

it takes a split second for namjoon to put two and two together and tenses up again. as if he feels your father’s hardened gaze behind him. your father didn’t take it too well when you introduced your professor as your boyfriend who proposed to you a week before.

“it was nice meeting you, yoongi, we look forward to see you at our wedding,” you extend a hand, the playful smile reserved for namjoon, now directed at your king.

the king whom you died for. and the king who you’re telling to live his life, as you’ll live yours.

“wouldn’t miss my best friend’s wedding for the world,” he smiles, his hand grasping yours and you thought you’re going to combust from the electrifying sensation that runs through your veins.

but it’s only short-lived. 

you pull your hand away and he summons his back to his side.

he turns to namjoon and gives him a pat on his shoulder, congratulating him again but this time, with a lingering stare before walking past the two of you and towards the parking lot.

“professor, i’ll get my purse from your office and we’ll be good to go.” you say absently before skipping to the opposite direction of where yoongi was headed.

with each step you take, you hear your heart breaking. just like the pieces of your memories that rains down like shards of glass.

you wonder if you’ll make it through this life without dying of a broken heart.

“i thought we fixed that?” namjoon murmurs behind you, just as you sling the strap of your purse over your shoulder.

“hm?” you turn to the man leaning against the doorframe, observing you with a crease between his brows.

“you called me professor again,” namjoon mumbles almost as if he’s sulking.

and your heart warms at the tender sight of a grown man acting like a child. you’re reminded of the reason you fell for kim namjoon. his gentle nature was the opposite of yours yet he laughed at your jokes like he laughed off your flirtatious advancements.

he told you he saw you as a student and lent you his scarf when he saw you shaking in the cold while waiting for your uber. the next time he saw you, at 11 pm before the library closes, he offered to drive you home even though his was in the opposite direction from yours.

“namjoon,” you say his name, a smile tucked on your lips as you wrap your arms around his waist and his arm that had been crossed over his chest instantly makes it way around you, “thank you.”

“for what?” his eyes light up like a christmas tree, dimple digging into his cheek.

“for choosing me,” you stand on the tip of your toes and he meets you halfway for the kiss.

and you loved min yoongi, you died for him.

you love kim namjoon, you choose to live the rest of your life with him.

x

note. so like, the title - technically, it’s like oc saying “my life is yours” to both yoongi and namjoon but in different lifetimes :D

[alison-anonymous]

I Want to Write a Mikayuu Series

Okay.

So um.

If you're reading this, HELLO. All of you long time ONS fans probably don't know me, but I'm Alison and I'm a hardcore Mikayuu, Mitsunoa, Gureshin, etc shipper. I've been in the ONS fandom for almost a year and dear god. The amount of people telling me that Mikayuu is queerbait is just making me really sad 😅 I'm a writer, and I'm the type of person who honestly feels like the author of a series should have the ability to choose how a story ends without influence of their readers. I mean, if it's their story, then it should be their ending, right? However, I also do have some qualms when it comes to how this "love triangle" between Yu, Mika, and Shinoa is being portrayed. This is entirely my personal opinion, but I feel like Shinoa seems to be forcing herself to love Yu. I honestly don't think she cares for him in a romantic way, but more of a very deep-rooted admiration or even envy that she's trying to convince herself to be romantic love. And Yu has said multiple times that he values Mika's life above his own, that he doesn't know what he would do without him if he were to die again (I mean the fact that he suffered seeing his best friend and potential lover die a first time was definitely scarring enough, PLEASE STOP TORTURING OUR POOR BABIES). And it's basically confirmed by now that when Mika said I love you in the manga, it was in the romantic sense. Even though I wish, I hope, I dream, and I pray that Mikayuu will become canon, I honestly can't say for certain what I think will happen. I think it could sway any way, with Mikayuu becoming canon, Yu and Shinoa becoming canon, or it being one of those ambiguous endings where it's heavily implied but nothing actually happens. And in order to make myself feel better when stuff like this happens, I tend to rewrite the entire story with the ending that I would have liked to see ;)

You're probably wondering where the hell this stranger is going with this. Well, I want to write a book. A series, actually.

One that's inspired by Seraph of the End.

Now, if you're interested in hearing me out, then feel free to keep reading. But if not, continue on with your scrolling, no hard feelings. But if you do, and I really hope that you do, give me a chance to explain.

I want to write a series inspired by Seraph of the End called Bloodsucker (working title, obviously). And this series is going to be a reimagination of ONS with an ending that I would have loved to see in the anime and manga. I plan to have three main characters (please keep in mind that I'm going to have name changes): Yuichiro, Mikaela, and a brand new character, Epic.

Now, I would begin this series a bit before the anime and I'm assuming the manga begins. I'd start with introducing our main three characters as they meet in the orphanage (yes, Epic would be a part of this orphanage as well) and how Epic and Yu try to make moves to run away only to be stopped by Mika and Akane.

I plan to include a scene between Epic and Akane where Epic tries to run out in the middle of the night only to be stopped by Akane, and this is what caused Epic to develop a crush on her (Epic is a girl btw). Then I would begin the whole shit with the vampires and how they set the world on fire and shit, but instead of the apocolypse, I'd make it so that most of the adults died in the fire while the kids were taken alive (because young blood is better and whatnot). This includes our little Hyakuya family. The directors would have tried to trade the kids lives for their own, and due to their selfishness, the vamps killed them and took the kids anyway.

This would begin my first story arc: the prewar.

Epic, Akane, Mika, and Yu would all be living under the vampires at this point along with the rest of the kids in their orphanage. I plan to include lots of moments of bonding that heavily imply Epic loves Akane even though she doesn't know it yet and Mika loves Yu, but Yu is fucking oblivious. The four begin to plot their escape, but while Mika and Akane (yes Akane too) are making deals with the vampires to help out with their family, Epic is constantly finding herself getting dragged along to visit Queen Krul. The pink haired vamp has a soft spot for her for some reason and often tells her that Epic and her family are "special" or sum shit. And she's super confused and semi grossed out. But none of the vamps ever dare to hurt her so she thinks it's fine. Then one day they all plot their escape and it's much more planned out and lengthy and less rushed than it is in the anime. Things almost seem to work out until the vampires stop them

And Mika and Akane DIE.

I know. I'm horrid.

Epic is standing here in shock as she watches the love of her life die before her and Mika BEGS for Yu to take Epic and run while they can. So while in the series only Yu survives, he obeys Mika and both him and Epic survive this. They're found by Guren (a new character I haven't come up with yet lol) and Yu is super protective over Epic, not wanting anyone to take the only piece of his family he has left (he's a fucking mess without Mika let's just be honest) and Guren ends up taking them under his wing.

Now we hit the second arc. Still with me?

The War.

Hold onto your hats everyone because this is where shit is about to get complicated. So I do plan to have a bit of a time skip into the current spot where Yu and Epic are attending school with Guren as their father figure and they've become very close. So close that Yu refuses to work with anyone else but her. They end up getting onto Shinoa Squad (obviously going to be completely different in my version) and they get put onto the battlefield. But here's the catch. Well, two catches.

Yu and Epic do have demon weapons. I do plan to try to incorporate that into this. BUT the backstory is different. I plan to make it so that the vampires obviously see the humans as fies. Insignificant things that are more playthings than threats. And they didn't want to have to deal with killing all of them, so they sent demons in their place to handle it. But the humans were able to form deals or "contracts" with the demons and therefore turned the vampires' own secret weapon against them.

Now, catch no. 2

So, Epic, Mika, and Yu aren't seraphs in this. But they are something else. I'm going to try to explain this as simply as I can, but each of them (besides Mika since he doesn't have a demon) have 3 souls inside their body:

Soul 1 is their current soul, the one that identifies as Mika or Epic or Yu.

Soul 2 is their demon soul, like what Asuramaru is to Yu.

And soul 3 is their archangel soul (I might change that name later on).

So I'm just going to come right out and say it. In this series, Epic is the villain.

Yes.

You read that right.

Epic is the villain. But she doesn't know that she is. These Soul 3s were reincarnated into the current bodies of Mika, Epic, and Ari (and I know that's not exactly how it works but screw logic this is just a fucking concept) from their lives centuries ago.

These souls existed way before vampires existed and Epic (or Essie) was very close friends with Yu (or Aytigin). Aytigin was in love with Haru (Mika) but for one reason or another, they couldn't be together. Essie wanted to do something, willing to do anything to make the two of them happy. So she made a deal that brought the vampires into creation so that Haru and Aytigin could be happy. She was willing to sacrifice everything that they stood for so that the two of them could be in love together.

She had good intentions, but of course Haru and Aytigin were furious because now the vampires were turning against the humans and they all basically died. Until they were reborn respectively, but unknowingly.

Now picking back up in the present, Yu and Epic are fighting in one of the main battles and the two are very confused when the vampires make a very deliberate attempt not to hurt Epic. They're unsure as to why, but Guren tells them not to worry about it.

Suspicious bastard.

Anyway, it's revealed finally that MIKA IS ALIVE

BUT HE'S ALSO DEAD

Yes he is a vampire. And Yu falls in love all over again upon seeing him, and after a bunch of struggling, Epic gets kidnapped. At first she gets strangled by Lacus and then she gets kidnapped by Ferid who doesn't kill her surprisingly.

Oh and uh... Ferid is nice in this. He's still a fucking creep, but he's a lot nicer than he is in the series. I plan to make Queen Krul or whoever I turn her into be the villain.

Anyway, they take Epic back to the vampire palace or whatever and Queen Krul and Epic are reunited! And Krul is the one who reveals to Epic exactly who she, Mika, and Yu are and this is what sparks Epic's fall to insanity.

I mean, she's the killer. She's the one who brought them into this world. She's responsible for every death the vampires cause.

I would go crazy too.

So, she manages to escape (partially thanks to Mika) and the two join Yu and the others again and it's revealed a second time exactly what is going on. And while no one actually blames Epic on the Shinoa Squad, that doesn't stop people like Kureto and even herself from blaming.

And this causes her demon to go haywire.

She begins losing her marbles, almost killing her teammates and trying to kill herself, all while the three begin to experience dreams or visions of their Soul 3s.

While all this shit is going on, there's heavy romance between Mika and Yu because these two lovers just got reunited and FUCK did they have glow ups but yes -

Oh. And there is another spark for Epic, even though she doesn't think she's worthy of love.

Okay. I'm just gonna say it.

Lacus falls in love with Epic. Yes. You read that correctly too.

I plan to make the two of them get trapped together at some point and they have to work together to escape. It's during this time that Epic realizes he's not all that bad and has some form of self control and he realizes that she's the most interesting thing he's ever met in this disgusting and boring life and damn do her eyes look pretty-

But yes. She forms a permanent alliance with him that he jokes about as marriage and they meet on other occassions too, but lol yes.

Anyway, blah blah blah, more fall to insanity, the Soul 3s take over their bodies on multiple occasions and there's a lot of bonding and fighting and Epic and Mika somehow manage to get some of the vampires on the human side.

And in the end, Epic and Yu basically sacifice themselves to save the human race and kill Queen Krul. It's a very rough ending I haven't quite perfected yet, but Yu has a moment like he did with the King of Salt. But though he inflicted a lot of damage, it's not enough. So while the team is worried about him, Epic takes this opportunity to fix her and Essie's mistakes.

She allows both Essie and her demon to take control of her body and dies on the battlefield. Queen Krul is eliminated. Most of the vampires are gone. The humans won.

Horray.

Epic is dead.

Kinda. Yu and Mika take her back home and this is the preview to the last arc where everyone's in the hospital and Epic's in a coma. Mika and Yu barely ever leave her side and it's only when Lacus of all people comes to visit that she fucking wakes up.

Okay. Are you still with me? Now come with me to the final arc.

The Post-War.

No my friend. It doesn't end there. Because Mika and Lacus are still vamps and life still sucks and I drank too much coffee this morning.

No it's not over yet.

So flash forward a couple years and Kureto and Crew are working as the heads of this city. Stuff is being rebuilt, people are settling down in homes, Lacus and some of the other "good" vampires find jobs, and Mika, Yu, and Epic get a house together (in case I didn't mention before, Epic is pansexual. She loved Akane dearly and I plan to include scenes where she sees her in her mind and dreams like Mikayuu so she's never truly gone, but she falls for Lacus too when he's not being a sadistic asshole). Things are going strangely when

BAM. Epic and Yu come up with a cure for vampirism.

How, you may ask? I don't fucking know, I haven't read about it in the manga yet but before we come up with an idea for it, imma say they came up with it through a spell. They share their findings with Guren and soon all vampires are being cured, most notably Mika, Lacus, and even Rene.

BUT and there's always a but, Kureto passes a new law claiming all vampires to be property. That any vampire or previous vampire or even vampire supporter/owner that tries to disobey these new laws is to be killed immediately. Now Epic and Yu are in jeopardy because their ex-vampires are in danger (Epic and Lacus have been hanging out a lot more and he's proven himself to be a decent guy. Contrary to popular belief, I headcanon him as not really knowing what to do when he actually cares about someone since he's been a heartless vamp for so long. So when he turns to Mika and begrudgingly asks him for LOVE ADVICE of all fucking things, Mika is ready to die). So basically, Mika and Lacus end up getting locked up along with the other ex-vamps (including Ferid which was a pain in the ass) and did I forget to mention that there's a proposal?

Oh yeah, Yu proposes to Mika and the blond still has yet to give him an actual answer because poor baby is still having a hard time accepting that Yu can love a "monster" like him.

But anyways, now Epic and Yu are furious and SHINOA SQUAD IS BACK IN BUSINESS. With the help of Guren and Shinya and everyone, they form a sort of rebellion and blah blah blah they manage to get Mika and Lacus and everyone out and blah blah blah they all get separated and Lacus begins to get INSANELY protective of Epic and ends up confessing his feelings to her before he nearly dies and blah blah blah did I forget to mention that I'm making Mitsunnoa and Kimizuki x Yoichi canon and blah blah blah.

Epic kisses Lacus as an instinct. Lacus kisses her again. Mika accepts Yu's proposal then almost dies AGAIN. I kill off some characters for emotional tugs and after a ton of more fighting and revenge and psychological breakings later, Kureto is killed. And Guren (or someone else haven't decided yet) is the new head of their city.

Epic, Mika, and Yu finally let Akane and the kids go. There's a lot of Shinoa Squad bonding but this is a summary so I haven't included much besides the main three. Epic and Lacus becomes canon. Mika and Yu get married. Guren and Shinya get married. Shinoa gets pregnant.

And everyone gets the FUCKING HAPPY ENDING THAT THEY ALL FUCKING DESERVE BECAUSE FUCK

I do plan to be slightly ruthless like the creator and include a lot of heartbreaking scenes, but it's going to be much different than ONS but I still want it to hold on to some core relationships.

I just want them to be happy. And I just want to make other people happy because fuck I JUST WANT TO BE HAPPY

So. Yeah.

That's Bloodsucker...

So my question to you is... if I wrote this shit.

If I sat down and typed about 30 books roughly inspired by Seraph of the End and Mikayuu and Mitsunnoa and shit...

Would anyone read it?

♡ a.a.

[bakatenshii]

Katsuki x Leese HCs

I uhhh have no excuses for this. This turned out so much longer than expected and I just?? Hope you don’t lose too many braincells hehe Inspired by our mutual obsession love for the Yakuza. For @lookslikeleese 3.5k! U make my kokoro doki doki ♡︎ \٩(๑`^´๑)۶/ ♡︎

So we all know Weese Leese as this saint, an angel sent from above, a pure soul that could do no wrong.

Leese, who puts up with our spamming, random bursts of thirst at 4am, answering everyone with nothing less than kind words straight out of a self-help book.

The reincarnation of Mother Theresa herself, if you will (minus the controversial problematic part)

Except I’m bout to blow your mind right now, cue the big TRIGGER WARNING: MIND BLOWING INFO AHEAD:

She’s a bit of a closet brat. No, not the kind that’s outwardly sassy, she’s just not a pushover. And maybe a lil stubborn.

Especially if someone who has no right to challenge her is speaking down to her.

See: 6’3, beeg beefy undercut Katsuki

Katsuki, who’s patrolling his district in the Kabukicho, making sure no one’s doing illegal business in his area, his property

He probably didn’t need two bodyguards with him, he could handle himself just fine. (He doesn’t know that they were just there to keep him in line, make sure he doesn’t blow up a hostess club because a man walked in who looked like Deku)

But it was a spectacle to see either way, three massive tatted men storming down the rowdy streets like it’s nobody’s business— (soon there might be none left if they keep scaring the fucking customers away)

Don’t get impatient, we’ll tie them together somehow I promise, and no they’re not going to fight over spilt boba this time

(Or any mugging of any kind, though that’s a good fuckin trope that I will shamelessly re-use)

Weese Leese is walking home from work, and sees some sketchy men in a dingy alleyway in sunglasses and suits— she knew right away that they were Top Tier suspy

I mean, if the way they were trying to coerce an innocent-looking girl in school uniform didn’t already give it away, the sunglasses at 8pm definitely did the job.

So Weese Leese took her whole Mother Theresa, Thou Shalt Not Hurt an Innocent Girl (pls no one religious attack me please) ass over

Because she’s too good for this world, honestly

Can’t help but jump in to try and help someone in potential danger, she knew it all too well herself.

Of course the men flip out, screaming at her to fuck off or take the poor girl’s spot

(for the sake of this AU we’re going to pretend that either we all speak fluent anime Japanese or it’s in English, plotholes be damned)

This is when Big Boss Katsuki comes marching in, wide as the alleyway itself, and—

Doesn’t come to Weese Leese’s aid, SIKE yall thought he was gonna be a knight in shining armour?

Nah, he’s pissed that a random woman is sticking her nose in somewhere she doesn’t belong

There’s a lot of ‘aniki’s and ‘oyabun’s and ‘kumicho’s going around, and Weese Leese has seen enough Yakuza movies fantasized about enough tatted men with missing pinkies to understand that she fucked up

Sort of.

This 200lbs of pure muscle of a man is the Head of Some Family, probably, and like, yeah, realistically she should be flittering in fear, but the only thing she’s getting are fanny flutters (alliteration or whatever, we out here)

BUT how much she wants to fuck this man still doesn’t excuse the fact that his subordinates were trying to force a (most-likely) underage girl into fuck-knows-what

So when Katsuki, in true aggressive on-brand fashion, practically roars out a

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing, woman? Stay in your lane, this is my business”

She actually, to everyones surprise, retorts:

“Maybe teach your subordinates to use their brains a lil and pick out someone who’s not clearly underage and still in uniform next time, then.”

So now we’re back to the beginning, end of the: record scratch, freeze frame, ‘Yup, that’s me. You’re probably wondering how I got here’ sequence

Told you it’d all tie together, sans-boba

Back to the show:

Katsuki’s fucking shocked, kinda impressed, but mostly pissed off that some ‘stupid woman’ is talking back to him telling him how to run his business

Weese Leese is… kind of terrified, mostly turned on though, because her brain’s wiring must’ve gotten tangled when she turned into this alleyway.

Sucks for him because she had a point, and Katsuki’s not fucking blind— he can see the uniform clearly on this stupid girl’s body.

They deal with it some Yakuza way, I’ll spare yall the details and me the work of doing research and writing more nonsensical irrelevant waffle (because weese has the attention span of a 3 year old and doesn’t like long drawn out narratives boohoo)

Cut scene back to Katsuki, his two irrelevant bodyguards, and Weese Leese, stood alone in the alleyway.

He’s fuming because she’s demanding an apology for his attitude, his bodyguards are only slightly worried they might have to repave the alleyway (again), and Weese Leese is…

scanning any sliver of exposed skin for some yummy scary tattoos

Long story short, one long passive aggressive (from Leese’s end), straight up aggressive (from Katsuki’s end), argument later, he swallows his pride and offers her a drink at a local bar he owns as a means of apology.

because he’s not saying those words

(also to flex, he’s a proud bastard, he is)

We’ve all read Weese Leese’s hcs about drunk! Leese right? So we know how bold she is?

And how touchy she is and how her brain-to-mouth filter takes a holiday on a Caribbean island so she’s spouting shit like ‘show me your tattooooooos’ and not noticing how he’s blushing in response?

Drunk! Leese gets too drunk, and conveniently loses her keys (she just can’t find them, dont worry we’re not losing deposit money here) so in true Josei manga fashion, he takes her to a hotel 

(THAT HE OWNS, HE OWNS EVERYTHING, OYABUN KATSUKI COMING THROUGH)

Because he can’t take her back to his, obviously. Not only is that embarrassing but also dangerous.

(Not that he cares what happens to her, obviously)

Stupid fucking tsundere

Do they diddle the do at the hotel? You decide, but they definitely diddle the do the next morning when she wakes up, sees him splayed on the bed on his stomach and she absentmindedly traces over the back-piece he’s got.

Yeah, he’s for a back-piece. It’s entirely self-indulgent, I don’t care. He’s also got all ten of his fingers because I say so.

And he wakes up with a raging boner mighty need and a half naked girl in his bed caressing the muscles on his back and

BLEEP

Insert censor bar here.

He doesn’t admit that he likes her, of course he doesn’t. Do you even know how tsunderes work?

He just thinks she’s nice, and comforting, let’s him be loud and angry all he wants, but can also stand her own ground and so, so lovely fun to be around. She’s great company, that’s all.

The head of a house needs a woman to play around with, right? That’s what all his shateis say (see: Yakuza term for younger brothers)

So what if they don’t buy their women flowers, take them to fancy dinners at restaurants they own, pound them against the penthouse windows of hotels they own, and begrudgingly take hot soaks in the fancy marble bathtubs the morning after.

He’s just better than them, that’s all.

He’s always the best at what he does, always has to be #1, so courting a woman shouldn’t be any different.

It’s not until his shateis poke fun at how soft he’s become and asks him when he’s inviting her to move in when he realizes—

fuck.

He’s in too deep.

But there’s something special about fucking his woman on the ancient tatami flooring of the house, (he’d only had to replace two holes, so he’s doing alright to be fair) 

Or outside on the wooden planks of the hallway, legs pushed down to her ears as he plows her in front of the judging eyes of the Koi fish in the Japanese garden.

Or having her parade around in clothes he chooses for her, proudly displaying her as his. And so they live happily ever after, Yakuza movie style.

They might pop out an heir within the next two years, but that’s all for the better, right? Gotta continue the bloodline and whatnot.

edit: weese made a picrew with yakuza! katsuki

[generalherasyndulla]

ALL. MICHISELLE

Fuck dude, that’s a lot it’s going under a read more homie

for everyone else send me ship headcanon asks 

1. Who makes the first move and how?

Well CANONICALLY it was less a first move on either part, and more just a series of things they both did. Giselle grew a rose for Michel as a “thank you for being friends” type of thing and then Michel, big dumb in love idiot that he is just picks the rose and puts it against her hair because he’s very much in love and doesn’t know how to deal with that, so he just lies and says he wants to draw her with the rose in her hair and then that leads to a whole thing so who even knows at that point

2. Who is the most insecure and what makes them feel better?

I’d say it’s about equal insecurity wise. In canon Giselle has her insecurities about how 1000 years she’s no longer the same person or even “good enough” for Michel while Michel has big insecurities about his body due to being intersex. After canon they’ve healed mostly from these insecurities, but it still pops up. What makes Giselle feel better is being grounded to reality, just being reminded in someway that she no longer has to be trapped in the maid persona anymore and that even if she’s different she’s still Giselle at her core. What makes Michel feel better is any masculine-based comments or compliments. Just knowing that yes, he is a man and yes others see him as one too.

3. Who is the most romantic?

Post-reincarnation it’s definitely Michel, and Giselle loses it every time partially because she still never expects it and she can NOT handle it whenever Michel is smooth (she loves it though).

4. Who can’t keep their hands to themselves?

Okay so first of all it took these bitches 1000 years to even have their first kiss canonically so like it takes a bit for them to get to that point.

Giselle is the more handsy one, she loves to play with Michel’s hair (and sometimes braid it) and to hold his hand, mostly because it helps ground her and remind her that the life she has with him is real. Plus she worked HARD to be able to be more physical with Michel and she’s gonna enjoy it dammit.

5. Who says ‘I love you’ first?

Canonically it was Giselle, accidentally.

6. Who would they ask if they ever had a threesome?

Probably Noemi/Imeon because she’s cute and both Michel and Giselle like and trust her enough. That said the chances of Michel and Giselle EVER engaging in a threesome is very unlikely. They’re very much content enough with each other.

7. What do they get up to on a night out?

On nights they like to go out for walks in a park or a garden somewhere. They usually do this on nights where the moon is visible because the way the moonlight reflects on each other is very nostalgic and reminds them of the moment they first got together.

8. What do they like in bed?

So, Michel canonically has a maid kink although he doesn’t try to do anything with Giselle in relation to at first because he’s scared of triggering her (due to her 1000 years of trauma under her maid persona). However, Giselle is observant and is aware of his kink and is the first to bring it up, they have a good talk and are able to negotiate boundaries because if it’s something Michel would enjoy Giselle wants to give it a shot and she doesn’t want to be held back by her past. It takes a little trial and error but they work something out.

Outside of his maid kink Michel is pretty vanilla. Meanwhile Giselle is a little more adventurous and is the first to suggest trying to bring something new into the bedroom. She’s willing to try most things once ( there are some hard limits though absolutely no fucking knifeplay being one of them)

9. What is the most embarrassing thing they have done in front of each other?

Giselle will NEVER let Michel live down that time he fell on her and accidentally groped her breast and then fucking compared it to an obese rat. (I’m going with canon again here because honestly, I can’t make a headcanon to top that)

As for Giselle, when she was introducing Michel to her college friends, they all went to a bar and Giselle had a little too much to drink. The specifics are a blur but her one friend did take a video of Giselle very LOUDLY proclaiming her love of Michel to everyone in the bar (she also almost got into a bar fight when one of the other patrons called her annoying).

10. What two songs, two books and two luxury items do they take to a desert island?

Two songs: Walking on Sunshine by Katrina and the Waves because I feel like it’s a song Giselle really likes (I think she’s into very upbeat and positive music) and Michel secretly likes it too just because it makes him think of Giselle (who in his words brought “light into his life”). The other is Symphonic of Fata Morgana because the concept of just breaking the fourth wall like that is funny and I have no better answer because this is a weird question and I don’t know music outside of musicals asgdrhftdrges

Two books: the book they read together in their first life (it’s never titled in the VN but it’d be nice to have for nostalgia), and Stardust by Neil Gaiman for no other reason than I think it’s a book they’d like

Two luxury items: A hairbrush and hair elastics (because they are BOTH hair monsters and need these things)

11. What do they hide from one another?

So, ignoring what they both initially hid in canon, by the time of modern-day Michel initially attempts to hide his lack of dating experience from Giselle (prior to getting her memories back Giselle has a few relationships in high school and college). Meanwhile Giselle initially tries to hide periods of dissociation where she’d slip back into the maid persona. Neither of them are able to hide this very long though and in the long term they’re very open and honest with each other.

12. What first changes when it starts getting serious?

I mean in canon the big thing that changed was Giselle no longer called Michel “master”. By the time they meet up again reincarnated because they have all their memories they pretty much just START at the serious point.

13. When do they realize they should get together?

It happened because of the moonlight’s spell (you don’t have to watch the entire video, I just know a summary can’t do this scene justice. I’d recommend starting where I have it linked and stopping at like roughly 5:05:07. Or you could watch past that I’m not the boss of you) 

14. When one has a cold, what does the other do?

Giselle immediately goes into caretaker mode. She will insist that Michel get rest and do basically anything she needs to take care of him. She remains outwardly calm and essentially just acts as a nurse. Michel meanwhile freaks out when Giselle so much as has a little cold. He tries very hard to take care of her but he’s so panicked that he definitely goes overboard in caring for her. Giselle is all “it’s just a cold please relax” but Michel is like “NO I HAVE TO TAKE CARE OF YOU.”  

15. When they watch a film what do they choose and why? Who gets the final vote?

They both really like action movies, although they have to be a little careful because Giselle gets TOO hyped up from certain movies. Michel likes to fantasize about being a big manly action hero because that what he’s wanted to be since he was a child while a good action movie gets Giselle SO pumped and ready to kick ass. They alternate over who gets to pick the movie.

16. When the zombie apocalypse comes, how do they cope together?

They cope by just focusing on the fact that they’re together. Honestly as long as they have each other than zombies could hardly compare to the hell they’ve gone through already. They also make a “no bullshit heroics pact”. Either they’re both going to survive together, or they perish together. Neither of them are gonna sacrifice themselves for the other because Giselle is NOT going through that again and she doesn’t want to put Michel through that.

17. When they find a time machine, where do they go?

Michel goes into the past, specifically in his first life when he was just a child before he was Michel. He doesn’t have any big plans he just talks to his child self and tells him that he will be happy and accepted and comfortable with himself. His child self can’t understand, not yet but he hopes that it can help with what’s ahead.

Giselle chooses 50 years in the future. She’s seen enough of the past she just wants to know if she and Michel are still alive and happy that long. She wants a guarantee that she DOES have her happy ending for a long time. She sees herself and Michel, far older but still recognizably themselves, still very much as in love as they were 1000-ish years ago. And that’s all Giselle needs.

18. When they fight, how do they make up?

So, they are both incapable of being mad for long. One of them usually leaves their apartment to get space and time to cool their heads. After having that space whoever stormed out immediately comes back and they both apologize as soon as they see other and then talk things out.  

19. Where do they go on their first date?

Their first date was a whole vn scenario. So, I’m gonna talk about their second date. For their second date Giselle just went over to Michel’s apartment and they read the book they bought on their first date together. It was nice being snuggled up together and reading a book together, just like they did 1000 years ago. It’s far easier for them to just slip back into their dynamic since they got the “first date after being reincarnated” awkwardness out of the way.

20. Where do they go on holiday?

For big vacations they decided to travel to the different places the mansion has been because Giselle is curious about what those places are like now and what has changed and what’s similar. Plus she never really got an opportunity to actually explore these cities since she was just “living” in a cursed mansion plus Michel never really gets out much and Giselle is so excited about going on “an adventure” that how could he possibly say no.

21. Where do they get nervous about going with one another?

They are both really nervous about the first time Michel meets her family. It’s something he never got to do in their first lives or ever since he’s had zero dating experience and isn’t the most sociable person. He is terrified about making a good impression and Giselle is a bit anxious too since her family can be a bit overprotective. Thankfully Michel is able to win them over since they can all see how happy they are together but it was definitely one of the scarier moments in their reincarnated lives.

22. Where does their first kiss happen?

In their reincarnated lives the first kiss happens shortly after their first date. After Giselle spent the night with Michel and they enjoyed breakfast together Giselle gave Michel a quick chaste kiss goodbye when she left. She didn’t think about it really it was more instinct but the minute she realized what she just did (which was after she left the apartment) Giselle definitely screamed internally. Meanwhile Michel’s brain just short-circuited immediately after the kiss but in a good way.

23. Where is their favourite place to be together?

Michel loves to be with Giselle when she’s working in her café. She’s just so completely confident and happy in her element and honestly Michel would be perfectly content just watching her do her thing forever.

Giselle’s favourite place in their bed just after waking up. She often wakes up before Michel and she just like to take a few minutes to just take comfort in Michel’s warmth and how easy it is to just be with him. Plus, he’s just so adorable when he sleeps, so calm and peaceful.

24. Where do they first have sex?

It happened in Michel’s apartment, a couple of months into dating each other. Michel is honestly extremely nervous at first because sure Giselle knows he’s intersex but knowing and seeing are two different things and he’s pretty anxious, but Giselle is very quick to re-assure him. They take it slow because they’ve wanted this for SO long and get to finally have it and they both want to enjoy it.

25. Why do they fight?

They don’t fight often but when they do it’s usually comes from a place of love and disagreeing on the best way to handle a situation. The fights never last long but neither of them really like fighting each other.

26. Why do they need to have a serious chat?

Usually when one of them is feeling anxious or triggered by something related to their past lives. 

27. Why do their friends get annoyed with them?

To everyone else Michel and Giselle are the golden perfect couple that no one could possibly live up to and boy can that get annoying (especially among their single friends).

28. Why do they get jealous?

Michel gets a little jealous when Giselle first tells him about her past relationships in her reincarnated life, but he gets over it pretty quickly.

Giselle tends to get a little more jealous in everyday life. Michel is a VERY pretty man and while he doesn’t notice it Giselle definitely notices every time a young woman stares at Michel. There was at least one occasion where someone was definitely flirting with Michel while Giselle was right there, and Michel did not notice (he can’t register flirting unless it comes from Giselle it truly boggles the mind) but Giselle did and channeled her jealousy into being EXTRA clingy to Michel and channeling the passive aggressive energy of the Maid in the full direction of this poor other woman. (again, Michel doesn’t quiiiite get what’s happening, but he thinks it’s all fine, probably?)

Jealousy doesn’t affect their relationship though, after everything they’ve been through, they’re pretty confident in their love for each other.

29. Why do they fall a little bit more in love?

Michel falls more in love every time Giselle smiles.

Giselle falls more in love waking up every morning beside Michel and getting to see that yes, he’s really here.

30. Why does it work (or not work) between them?

It works because both have been through so much trauma and so much pain in their first life. It works because they formed a good friendship that then blossomed into something more. In their first life they only had a month as a couple, yet it was enough for Michel to be willing to die to protect Giselle and for Giselle to wait hundreds of years for him to return. Giselle saved Michel at a point where he had lost all hope he brought “light into his world” and when he met a Giselle who no longer remembered herself, who felt too damaged and broken to deserve love he told her he loved her anyway. It works because they’re just two hurt and traumatized people who found comfort in each other and the ability to not only help each other heal but to save a young girl who was just as hurt and just as broken.

It works because they have been through hell and back for each other and they fought so hard just to be together, and they EARNED their happy and normal life together. THEY INVENTED LOVE BABEY

[midnightartemis]

Chapters: 32/? Fandom: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy Rating: Explicit Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage Relationships: Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Rey/Ben Solo, Finn/Rose Tico, Poe Dameron/Rey, Poe Dameron/Finn, Poe Dameron/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren Characters: Rey (Star Wars), Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Ben Solo, Finn (Star Wars), Poe Dameron, Rose Tico, Leia Organa, Han Solo, Luke Skywalker, Maz Kanata, Larma D'Acy, Amilyn Holdo, Snoke (Star Wars), Boba Fett, Bossk (Star Wars), Armitage Hux, Chewbacca (Star Wars) Additional Tags: Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Abuse, Drug Use, Suicide Attempt, Star-crossed, Dreams, Alternate Universe - High School, High School, School Dances, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Foster Care, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Near Death Experiences, Multiverse, Reincarnation, Attempted Sexual Assault, Assault, Graphic Description, Teenage Drama, Horny Teenagers, Fluff and Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, Past Drug Use, Drug Dealing

Chapter Three

Tuesday goes by without incident, though Latin will kill me. Rose is more than happy to walk me to my classes, chatting happily about her own, and I’m happy for the company for once. Poe and Finn are in my P.E. class and they’re so competitive. Rose tells me it’s okay to take them down a notch if I can. I’m athletic, but usually never got the chance to stay in a place long enough to participate in anything.

Wednesday rolls around and Rose is buzzing about Friday as we eat lunch. My eyes search for Ben, but I can’t find him anymore. “What’s Friday?”

“Oh, my god. I completely forgot to add you to the group chat.” Rose palms her face and gets out her phone. I sheepishly hand her my half-broken iPhone but she doesn’t bat an eye. “Poe, Finn, and I are having a little get together to celebrate the start of the school year. Please, come. I know you have to ask Maz.”

I’d never been invited to a party before. “I would love that. I’ll ask her tonight.”

I hope Maz said yes. Things were going smoothly there.

Rose and I left lunch early so that we could walk together to class. Rose liked to show up early to vocal class to help set up and I was more than happy to have a few minutes alone, even if it met sitting in awkward silence with him.

I open the classroom door and he’s there sitting where he was Monday. I take my seat across from him and pull out my headphones to listen to music for a bit. I scroll for a while and settle on The Lumineers’ Ophelia album. It takes a lot for me to not dance and hum along, so I pull out my drawing notebook and start in on practicing drawing 3D shapes.

I feel his eyes on me and I look up, realizing that I’ve been bobbing along to the music. He looks away and I think there’s a hint of a smile on his face. I flush. What is it with him? He didn’t look like a hardcore drug dealer, not like the ones I’ve seen. He looked quiet and lonely. Soft. Dammit, Rey.

He looks up again and sees me watching him. He scowls, his mood instantly souring. I look away sheepishly.

“Sorry.”

“Did they get to you, too?”

“What?” My heart races at his voice. My eyes meet his and they’re looking over me intensely.

“The golden trio.” His voice is low, angry.

Poe, Finn, and Rose? I frown. “I-”

Before I can say anymore, the door opens and Mrs. Tico walks in, cheerful as ever. “Hi, Rey! Ben!”

“Hi, Mrs. Tico.” I smile back, but inside my stomach is rolling with anxiety. What did he mean ‘ get to me?’ Rose had made it pretty clear what happened and I doubted Poe just hated Ben for shits and giggles. I look back at him and he’s concentrating on his notebook as if nothing had happened. I scowl and go back to my own work.

“How was school, hun?” Maz picks me up in her bug after school to take me to therapy.

“Good.” I smile. “I have a mountain of homework already, but everyone is really nice.”

“Good, good.” We drive without talking, just listening to the radio quietly. My stomach turns as I think about the party. I cross my fingers and ask.

“Maz?”

“Yeah?” she glances at me.

“I was wondering- well… Rose and Poe and Finn were getting together Friday night and they invited me. And I was wondering if I can go?” I bite my lip and look at her hopefully.

Maz smiles. “Ah… the infamous Dameron Back to School get-together.”

My eyes widen. “Oh. Oh. I didn’t realize it was a party-party. Nevermind.”

“No, Rey. Go! Have fun. Enjoy your friends. Just no drinking or drugs. I’m here to keep you safe and healthy, not ruin your high school experience.” Her eyes sparkle, but there’s a seriousness to them. “11:30 PM. At the latest. Okay?”

I nod, trying to hide my excitement. “11:30. Got it.”

We pull into a parking lot of a small brick office building downtown and Maz walks me in. We go to the second floor where there’s a small waiting room. It’s very zen with comfy chairs, light incense, peaceful art, and meditation music in the background. There are two doors, both closed. Maz and I sit and wait until the door on the left opens. A man walks out and he’s got a wide, open face covered in a grey beard and eyes that radiate kindness and knowing. I instantly feel at ease when he smiles. “Rey?”

I nod and stand. He walks over and sticks out his hand and I shake it. “I’m Luke Skywalker. Let’s go in and have Maz fill out some paperwork and then we will get started on your introductory session.”

Did everyone in this town know Maz? We fill out the usual paperwork in Luke’s office. It’s just as zen as outside. There’s a Buddha sitting on a bookshelf perfectly curated with books on mental health and well being. A fountain trickles gently in the corner. Everything is in order, at balance.

“I’ll be waiting in the lobby.” Maz signs the last paper and leaves us. I take a seat on the couch and Luke sits in the chair across from me.

“So, Rey,” he says with a small sigh. “I’m guessing this isn’t your first time in therapy?”

I laugh a little. “No.”

“Well, I have a few questions that we can discuss, but first, I just want to give you a little overview of what our plan is if you choose to move forward. I like to do a little one-on-one session before placing you in a group. I run a few groups, and it’s all just about trying to place you in the right one where I think you have the best chance of learning and listening to your peers and sharing your own stories. Sounds good?”

I nod.

“So, tell me about yourself, Rey. Your childhood, things you like to do… Anything you’d like in whatever way you want to tell me.”

“Well…” I take a deep breath. The story in my head is one that’s carefully rehearsed, told over and over. “My parents abandoned me when I was six. I was found by some workers abandoned in the Jakku city dump. And they couldn’t find my parents, so I got placed into the system. I jumped around a lot as a kid. No one really wanted me. And then when I got older, I got tired of the abuse and the neglect, so I started gathering evidence on my fosters and getting their licenses revoked. But that just met that I jumped around even more. I’ve just kinda learned how to survive and take care of myself.”

“That sounds hard and exhausting.”

I nod and sigh. “Yeah.”

“What about now? You’ve only been at Maz’s a few days, from my understanding. How’s that going?”

“Good. I think.” I reply. Luke says nothing, waiting for me to fill the silence. “It’s a lot to process. Everything changed so quickly and she’s unlike any foster I’ve ever stayed with. It’s… It’s almost like it's too good to be true… And, I guess I’m worried that it will be. Or I’ll fuck up and it will all be taken from me.”

“Do you think you deserve a good foster home?”

I can’t meet his eyes. Tears prickle at my own. “No.”

“Why not?” Dang, this guy is good.

“I’m not anyone special… There are a lot more kids out there who are a lot more deserving.”

“So… What I’m hearing is that you spent the last few years catching abusers in the system… But you’re not deserving of a good home?” He raises his eyebrow at me. I see his point, but I still can’t reconcile myself with it. “You sound pretty special to me, Rey.”

“I’m not anyone special.” I shrug. “I just didn’t want other people to go through what I have.”

“Do you feel that’s your duty? To save other people?”

I mull over his question and nod slowly.

“There aren’t many people out there who would put others before their own personal wellbeing and safety. What things do you like doing for yourself?”

“I like listening to music… And working with my hands.”

Luke smiles. “Good. Those are really good ways to take care of yourself.”

“They help me a lot when I need a break from the outside world. It can be really… Overwhelming.”

“Tell me about that.” Luke nudges me in that direction gently.

“Well, I don’t know. It’s like… I can get really overwhelmed in crowds. If there’s a lot of noise or people or things going on. It gets hard to think and concentrate.”

“Like at school?”

I nod.

“Is there anywhere you go to get away from the noise and let yourself relax for a bit?”

“Usually after lunch, I go to the art room because there’s no one there before class usually.” Not no one. Might as well be no one though.

“Good. It’s important to create room for yourself and thoughts and to listen to yourself.” Luke smiles. “Tell me about school. Are you enjoying your classes so far?”

“Yeah. Principal Organa was really happy with my interest in science and math. She put me in physics, and pre-calc, and small engines and I really like all three so far. It just makes sense to me. More than English or Latin or Social Studies. Though, I don’t mind Social Studies either. And psychology is interesting, too.”

“Very interesting.”

I laugh. “Right, I’m talking to a psychology master.”

“I have a group on Thursdays after school. It’s some of your age group dealing with some similar things as you. Is that something you would be interested in?”

“Yeah. Sure.”

“I’ll have you start next Thursday so I can let them know that the group is expanding a little. How does that sound?”

“‘Good.”

Luke nods and stands. “I’m afraid that’s all we have time for today. It was great to meet you, Rey.”

I stand and let him lead me out of the room.

[btsqualityy]

If I Die Young

Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Angst

Warnings: terminal illness, talks of funeral arrangements, death

Author’s Note: This imagine is based off of the song If I Die Young by The Band Perry! I’d highly recommend listening to it as you read this imagine.

“Thank you so much,” Jungkook smiled lightly as he followed the workers to the front door. Your lead health aide, Ji-woo, stopped and turned back to Jungkook as the others walked to their vehicles.

“Are you sure you can handle this on your own Jungkook?” Ji-woo asked gently and Jungkook sighed heavily before nodding slowly.

“I know her better than anyone. I think it’s best if it’s just mostly her and I for the next few weeks,” Jungkook explained.

“I can understand that. Call me when it becomes apparent, yeah?” She requested as she placed her hand on Jungkook’s arm.

“Of course, I know she’d want to thank you before,” Jungkook smiled sadly. After exchanging a gentle hug, Ji-woo waved one last time before stepping out of the house. Shutting and locking the door behind her, Jungkook sighed heavily as he looked around the house. 

It felt weird to be home for more than an half hour. For the past year, Jungkook only came home to shower, eat, and get more clothes; hell, he didn’t even leave to do those few things if he could get away with not being scolded by you for it. It felt weird to even call this place home anymore, since the hospital had been your home for a year and home for Jungkook was wherever you were.

“Kook?” He heard your gentle voice and he immediately straightened up, walking down the short hallway to the living room. He peaked his head into the doorway, seeing you resting in the specialized hospital bed that had been set up in the middle of the living room.

“Hey you,” he smiled.

“Hi yourself,” you murmured, holding your hand out to him. “Come here.” He walked all the way into the room, coming to stand at your bedside as he grabbed your hand in his.

“Comfortable?” He wondered and you shrugged. 

“As comfortable as I can be, considering the fact that I’m dying,” you joked lamely. Jungkook shushed you, shaking his head firmly.

“Don’t say that,” he scolded softly.

“Kook, it’s true,” you replied. When he just lowered his head and didn’t say anything else, you huffed. “Here, help me move over and then lay with me,” you requested, making him look up at you again.

“Y/N, you should be resting,” he said. 

“You are not about to deny me my cuddles, are you?” You grinned as a giggle escaped your mouth and Jungkook couldn’t help the way that his heart ached when he realized that it was the first time in he didn’t know how long that he’d heard that beautiful sound and he also realized that it would probably would be one of the last times he’d hear it.

“Fine,” he mumbled, pulling back the blanket that was covering your lap. He snaked his arms behind your back and around your thighs, lifting you up slowly and placing you further on the other side of the bed. After making sure that you were comfortable, Jungkook then climbed in bed next to you.

“Hold me, the way that you used to,” you whispered and Jungkook placed his arms around you, helping you turn onto your side so that the two of you were face to face.

“Happy now?” He simpered and you hummed as you brought your hand up, placing it on his neck and lightly stroking the skin there with your thumb.

“Somewhat satisfied,” you teased, making him roll his eyes playfully. “There’s some things that we need to talk about. Things that I want you to do after I’m gone.”

“Y/N,” Jungkook began to shake his head again but you placed your pointer finger on his lips since you couldn’t find the energy to shush him and he stopped talking.

“I know we made an agreement to not talk about that stuff, but you have to realize that was after I was first diagnosed. I just got out of hospice care though, Kook,” you pointed out as Jungkook’s lip began to quiver. “There are things that need to be settled and I don’t want you having to try and figure it all out after, ok?” After taking a deep breath to get himself under control again, he nodded slowly.

“Alright, tell me,” he sighed.

“I’d like to wear that blue satin dress, you know the one,” you divulged. “And my pearls, the ones you bought me for our first year anniversary.”

“I thought you always wanted to be cremated,” Jungkook interrupted.

“I do but I’d like for there to be some sort of service, for my parents,” you explained. “My mom is really torn up about the fact that I’m going first so I’d like to do something for them.” Jungkook couldn’t help the small smile that appeared on his face because even in your worst moments, you were still the same overly caring person that he’d fallen in love with.

“Ok. What else?”

“I want everyone dressed nicely. That means no bucket hats or over-sized hoodies Kook.”

“Ok, fuck you,” he chuckled, making you smile. “Anything else that you require?”

“Roses, lots of roses,” you stated firmly as you pushed his shoulder weakly. “And I’d like Taehyung to read a poem. It doesn’t matter which, you can choose.”

“Why Tae?”

“I’ve always loved the timbre of his voice,” you shrugged, making Jungkook chuckle. “There was something else,” you muttered, biting your lip as you tried to remember. “Oh yeah, that’s it. After the service, I do want to be cremated. I want you to give some to my parents and then take a portion for yourself. With the rest, I want you to take them and scatter them in a river.”

“Why a river?”

“You know how I said that I wanted to reincarnate as a fish?” You asked him and Jungkook nodded. “Well, I figure if I’m going to do that, one of my final resting places should be in water.”

“You are so odd, you know that?” Jungkook laughed as he shook his head at your logic. After his laughter tapered off, he just stared at you.

“What?” You questioned.

“I just, I’m gonna miss you,” he whispered and you pouted as you watched the tears well up in his eyes. 

“I’m gonna miss you too,” you agreed, moving your hand up to catch the tears that were now falling down his face.

“This is so unfair,” he muttered angrily. “We didn’t even have time to do everything we had planned on, like going skiing or buying a forever home or having babies.”

“That’s one of the few things that I wished we’d been able to do, have babies. It would make me feel a lot better about leaving you if I knew that you had a piece of me still around,” you confessed, causing the tears from Jungkook’s eyes to fall faster. “This damned ovarian cancer though,” you huffed, feeling yourself beginning to become emotional as well.

“I hate this,” he lamented as he looked away from you and closed his eyes.

“Hey,” you whispered as you caressed his cheek. “Look at me Kook,” you instructed and reluctantly, he opened his eyes to look at you. “As far as I’m concerned, we had just enough time. I mean, we found each other, fell in love, and got married. Some people live to be 80 years old and never get to experience that.”

“Yeah, but you’re not 80 years old Y/N-ah,” Jungkook snapped back. “I shouldn’t be losing you and the fact that I am and can’t do anything to stop it,” he paused as a harsh sob came from him, breaking your heart into small pieces. “It feels like a fucking knife in my heart.”

“Baby,” you tutted as you pulled him into you and let him sob into your neck. He instantly wrapped his arm around your waist, holding you close to him and you reveled in the feeling of being in his arms.

“I don’t want you to leave me,” he wailed and your heart ached, knowing that your illness was not only breaking you down, but Jungkook as well.

“I’m so sorry,” you apologized, pressing your lips to the side of his head in a weak kiss. You brought your hands up, softly and slowly running your shaky fingers through the strands of his hair.

..........................

A month. That’s how long it had taken you to slip away. Despite how much it fucking hurt to see you go, Jungkook was almost relived at not having to worry about whether or not today was the day that he was going to lose you anymore.

He had everything laid out everything exactly the way that you requested it: a small service with your family and friends in attendance, which your parents were extremely grateful for; he had you dressed in your favorite blue satin dress and your pearls, which he almost didn’t put on you because he wanted them as a keepsake but he couldn’t bring himself to disregard your request; and everyone was dressed nicely, with Taehyung reading a small poem that Jungkook had chosen.

“You’ll have to forgive me for it being so short,” he said before he read it. “Jungkook knew that Y/N would have wanted me to keep it short and sweet so that’s what we did,” he explained before closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. “You left us all with beautiful memories, your love is still our guide. And even though we cannot see you, you’re always by our side.”

After the service, Jungkook turned your body over to the local funeral home, where they carried out the cremation process. After buying a ornate urn, putting a third of your ashes into it and then turning it over to your parents, Jungkook took another third of the ashes and trekked out to your favorite river.

“Well baby, this is it,” Jungkook said as he crouched down near the bank of the river so that he was closer to the water. He heard a loud crack of thunder and hurriedly put the hood on his jacket over his head as rain began to drizzle from the sky.

“I can’t believe you really have me out here doing this in the rain,” he chuckled lightly. “You always said that I was whipped for you though and you were right. I’d do anything for you.” Taking a second to inhale and then exhale deeply, he opened the box that contained the small pile of your ashes. 

“Well, here’s hoping that you become that fish Y/N-ah,” he whispered before closing his eyes and upturning the box, letting the ashes spill out into the water. He opened his eyes and then watched as your ashes began to float on top of the water, moving downstream.

[connan-l]

Quiet moments — Chapter 1: Michel and Maria

Fandom: The House in Fata Morgana

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warning: Choose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Relationship: Michel Bollinger & Maria Campanella

Summary: A collection of unrelated short one-shots containing interactions between two The House in Fata Morgana characters.

Content Warnings: Very brief mentions of child prostitution, child abuse and suicidal ideation.

________________________________________________________________

Link on Archive of Our Own

________________________________________________________________

Notes: I just love making characters who wouldn’t normally interact, well, interact — and I also love giving attention to side and minor characters no one care about, so that’s how it happened. I wrote this on a whim and have no idea when I’ll be able to update it though, so don’t expect anything from me.

This will take place literally anywhere among the main game, Requiem and Reincarnation, so beware of spoilers!

I used the ‘Choose Not To Use Archive Warnings’ on AO3 just by precaution, but I don’t think there will be much to warn about, really. And if there is, I’ll put a content warning on top of the chapter anyway.

Takes place during Door 8, after Yukimasa told his story and Michel went to speak with Maria.

________________________________________________________________

Maria sat next to him and started talking, as promised. Despite being her usual assertive, confident self, she seemed a bit reluctant to discuss about her past — not because she was especially distrustful of Michel (although she still seemed pretty skeptical about everything he had told her), but because it just was her nature, he guessed. Given she was a young woman who grew up alone in a poor, dangerous district, it was only to be expected.

“I’m not actually born in this country, y’know?” She said suddenly.

“You’re not?” Michel asked, but he was not all that surprised. After all, Maria had been an Italian woman in the third door, so although a lot of things had changed in this era, it wasn’t odd that she wasn’t French.

“Yeah. I don’t really remember much about my hometown, though. I left when I was like, five or six maybe. My family… I think they must’ve been merchants or something, and they were travelling here for business. But they got into an accident and died. I had no one else, so I went into an orphanage here. I was a newly-orphaned foreign kid who barely spoke the language at all, so it was pretty rough at first…” She smirked. “But that’s when I met Pauline. She was a foreigner too, so although we didn’t come from the same country, I think maybe we felt some sort of kinship and that’s why we ended up clinging to each other…”

Michel tried to picture the two little girls in his mind; a mischievous six-year-old Maria and a tiny Pauline awkwardly following her around, none of them truly speaking the other’s languages but still trying to understand and play together… This mental image made him smile gently.

“Then you know the rest. Got fed up with the orphanage, ran away, ended up here and started working at the brothel… but anyway, you wanted to hear about Morgana, right? Bet you don’t care much about some ol’ whore’s childhood, haha.”

She laughed light-heartedly — as if she was talking about someone else, a character in a story, and not about her own difficult past. Michel winced instinctively, and hoped it didn’t show too much on his face. Maria had already briefly told them earlier about the abuse she experienced at the orphanage and that she became a prostitute when she was still just a young child. This life seemed so detached and so far away from the one he had lived that he struggled to imagine what it must’ve been like.

“There were… no other options for you at the time?” He asked softly, tentatively. “Maybe you could’ve gone to another orphanage, or…”

Maria narrowed her eyes with an annoyed expression, and Michel understood immediately he had said something insensitive.

“Which options?” She snapped back. “No way on earth I would’ve gone to another orphanage, I was done with that shit. It was the brothel or starving on the fucking street, so the choice was quickly made. Not everyone can be a noble rolling in dough like you, my dude.”

“Wha— How do you know I’m a noble?”

“Well, you just have that aura, you know? Your manners, the way you speak, you seem well-educated… You’re like that cute blonde pipsqueak — it’s just obvious we don’t live in the same sphere.”

Michel wondered if it really was that obvious, or if Maria was just very acute. Maybe it was both. He remembered, centuries ago, that Giselle had told him something similar, too — that he had a ‘regal’ aura, though back then he could never say if she was teasing him or if she was serious.

“I really… don’t consider my life to be that bad,” Maria whispered, her voice unusually quiet. “I mean, obviously it’s not great. I’ve been through some shitty times, I won’t deny that. I certainly wouldn’t complain if one day my good pal God took pity in me and decided to make me rich.”

She looked up in front of her — towards the horizon, her eyes vacant, and started to rub her naked arms. Michel couldn’t tell if it was because she was cold or because she tried to comfort herself from some bad memories.

“But… the simple fact that I am still alive right now makes me feel pretty damn lucky. Not everyone can say the same. So many of my friends — good, nice folks — didn’t get the same chance…”

The more he listened to her, and the more Michel felt kind of… uneasy. Had he ever felt like he was ‘lucky’ to be alive? Even during his darkest times, when he was locked up in his room at the Bollinger estate or during the ten years living in that haunted mansion, he couldn’t remember a moment where just the fact to be alive felt like a blessing. It rather felt like a curse, honestly. He couldn’t count the number of times he thought about dying, about all the times he almost made a suicide attempt — but how every time, old, fond childhood recollections of his brothers would come flocking back and make him hope that, maybe, just maybe, things could get better. But the idea that others may have had worse than him — like the dead girl who he tried to ignore for years and never attempted to understand, because understanding her would mean actually seeing her like a person and not like a formless cackling witch — thus that he should feel lucky never once crossed his mind. Back then, he was way too deep into his own pain and suffering that it never seemed relevant — until he met Giselle, that is.

And now that he thought about it… Michel certainly couldn’t say he had an easy childhood by any stretch of the imagination — especially not after his fourteen years old — but he still had been lucky enough to have been born into a noble and rich family. Aside from those two terrible years he spent being abused by Aimée, he couldn’t recall a time where he felt hungry or missed of anything. The same couldn’t be said of Maria.

Maybe she truly was good at reading people, because she seemed to instantly guess his train of thoughts and added: “Hey now, I didn’t say that to guilt-trip you or anything. I’m not interested in pity, anyway.”

“I wasn’t…”

She sighed. “If you nobles really feel so bad, then actually do something and use your power and money for a good cause, instead of ruminating. Some peeps could really need that.”

“Well… I am technically… not exactly a noble anymore…”

“Oh?”

“I was disowned.” And then I was killed, he thought. But I can’t exactly tell her that. “So I don’t have any power anymore. Though… even back then, I never had any actual power… everything was decided by my father and older brothers…”

“Hmm… Is that so… That sucks,” she declared, before crossing her arms. “So you had brothers?”

“Yes, but…” He took a deep breath. “We… something happened, and… They…”

Michel hesitated. Should he really start talking about himself right now? To Maria, of all people, who he only (technically) first met yesterday? But then he looked at the woman next to him in the eyes, who was silently and attentively listening to him. And he felt the need to continue.

“They betrayed me. And… they’re dead now. They died… a long time ago…”

He felt his chest tightening as soon as he mentioned his brothers, and his hands trembling a little. Maybe he shouldn’t have started talking about them after all. Mell and Nellie’s debacle had already reawakened some bad memories, and right now he needed to stay focused on Morgana and Giselle and—

Suddenly, he felt a soft, comforting pressure on his shoulder. When he turned around, he saw Maria looking at him with understanding green eyes as she was gently holding his shoulder, like an old friend would do.

“I dunno what happened to you exactly, so sorry if I asked something I shouldn’t have…”

“No, it’s fine…”

Maria looked away, wincing a little. “Though I… can relate. I had… well, I’m an only child, but… I did have someone I considered a brother once. And he… also betrayed me.”

Michel frowned, and was going to ask her more details… but then Maria looked at him and smiled.

“He died a long time ago too.”

It was… a strange smile. There was something nostalgic in it. Bitter, maybe. But also tender. Gentle. It wasn’t a smile he’d ever thought he’d see on the face of that rambunctious woman.

“I’m… sorry,” he said, stupidly, not being able to think something more eloquent.

She shrugged. “It’s okay. Like I said, it was a long time ago. I’m over it now.”

Michel could tell by the way she looked away and the sound of her voice that it was a lie. Maybe it hurt less — just like the intense pain of his brothers’ betrayal had slowly faded with time. But it wasn’t something you could just ‘get over.’

“Well, your brothers were idiots,” she suddenly said, and Michel arched an eyebrow.

“What?”

“It sounds like it’d be nice to have you as a brother, so they must’ve been idiots to betray you. I mean, you seem like a handful, but I’m sure I’d have a lot of fun teasing you. Too bad I wasn’t born as your sis. In another life maybe?”

Maria gently punched Michel in the shoulder with a wide grin and a wink, which earned him a chuckle. He wondered how much his life would have changed if he had had a sister in it, especially a sister like Maria. Would it have made things better? Or worse?

He couldn’t tell. However, he certainly wouldn’t refuse to have her as a sibling in another life.

[trauma-13]

All the asks 😈

Who hurt you the most?

My dad. He essentially walked out of my life when I was 12-13, and blames me for our lack of relationship and refuses to acknowledge his part in it. 

Who have you hurt the most?

Oh hell. Uh, I really don’t know. 

Who do you miss the most?

My mom, and my friends that I don’t see on a regular basis. @car-one-responding i’m looking at you. 

Who do you want out of your life the most?

Happiness and to feel like I’ve made a difference in someones life. If that’s a stranger, a friend, my son, my husband, doesn’t matter. I like helping people. (I misread, I thought this said WHAT do you want out of life, not WHO. So to answer the original question, I wouldn’t mind my dads wife wandering off somewhere and never returning.)

Who had the biggest positive impact on you?

There’s been quite a few people. My mom and two of my nursing mentors are the first ones who come to mind. My mom taught me to never give up on your goals, no matter how hard it is and how much you may struggle. She taught me to what a good mother is, and was always present in my life no matter how busy she was in her own life. She gave me my love of nursing and helping others from a very young age, and continued to inspire me to join the nursing profession. She continues to inspire me to further my dream within this career. My nursing mentors are a married couple I used to work with, who I still speak to on a fairly regular basis. They’re the epitome of amazing nurses. D is the kindest person, she gives every patient a piece of her heart and cares for them like they’re her own family (even the frustrating ones). She’s so loving to her friends and family as well and goes above and beyond to help them anyway she can. M is also an incredibly caring nurse, who is the smartest human I’ve ever met. Not just in nursing, but in every aspect. He’s continued his education into his 60s to further his career and his knowledge to provide the best care for his patients. When I first met M, I had just started at my prior job, I was fairly quiet just because I didn’t really know anyone yet. I had worked there maybe a week or two, he put an arm around my shoulders and said “You’re kind of quiet, do you want to be friends?” and immediately he was my favorite person. Of all the people I’ve worked with through my 10 yrs in health care, D and M are the ones I miss the absolute most. 

Who had the biggest negative impact on you?

Again, my dad. I have very good and fun memories with him when I was little, like 10 and under. However, he decided his wife and her children were more important than his own and he walked out of my life. It took a VERY long time (probably 10 yrs) for me to get over his abandonment, and accept that it wasn’t my fault and there is nothing wrong with me as a person that caused it. 

Who do you wish you could be honest with?

I’m a pretty fuckin honest person, and I tell people like it is. There aren’t many people I don’t just speak my mind to. 

Who have you harbored (any kind of!) secret feelings towards?

I’m sure I have in the past, but there isn’t anyone who comes to mind specifically. 

Who would the world be better off without?

The cheeto in charge of our country. Sorry, not even a little bit sorry. 

Who do you wish you’d treated differently?

I was a dick in high school to a lot of people, and I don’t really think I had any reason. 

What was the worst day of your life?

The day I got kicked out of nursing school. I obviously got back in, but it was a horrible experience. 

What’s your greatest fear?

Failure. 

What’s your biggest insecurity?

My knowledge level. I feel like I’m not as smart as I should/could be. 

What’s your biggest regret?

Staying in my past relationship for as long as I did, and ignore all the red flags that were there since day one. 

Describe your ideal world.

Cleaner air, less crime, less pollution (across the whole world), more green/renewable energy use, a safer world for my kid to grow up in. Married to my hubby, raising our son and possible a #2, to have the financial ability to help foster rescue dogs. 

Describe your personal hell.

The current world we’re in. 

What’s a hopeless dream you’re still holding on to?

Hmm. I feel like I’ve always had very realistic dreams. So probably the slim chance that I’ll win the lottery haha! 

What’s the most embarrassed you’ve ever been?

Probably when my douche bag ex got shitfaced, the PD called on him, they called fire for an evaluation because he had a lac on his hand due to punching glass, they wanted to take him to the ER and because he was absolutely obliterated he couldn’t refuse annnnd they took him to the ER I worked at. When I got there he was in full on 4 pt restrains and had been given the magical vitamin H. I shoulda turned and walked out then (or one of the many red flags before....)

What’s the angriest you’ve ever been?

When said ex threatened to hurt my dogs because I told him I was done and to pack his shit and get out. He pulled a knife on me and said he would kill me and the dogs if I tried to leave him. I figured I could probably keep myself alive if he did attack me, but if he hurt my dogs I’d have gone to jail that day. 

What’s the saddest you’ve ever been?

Honestly? this last week. motherhood is hard. breastfeeding is fucking hard. I was having such a difficult time with breast feeding and postpartum depression that I had legitimate suicidal thoughts with a vague plan of what I would do. I’m fine now, don’t go calling for a welfare check. 

What’s the most scared you’ve ever been?

Again when douchey ex threatened my dogs. They’re my world and I would do anything to keep my kids (2 and 4 legged) safe. 

What’s the most hopeless you’ve ever felt?

Also this week. 

What’s the most frantic you’ve ever felt?

Frantic?? uh fuck, the most recent time I can think of was the day before my son was born, my OB told me I had to go to the OB triage at my hospital because my BP was high and she needed to monitor JTD and make sure he was okay. 

What’s the bravest you’ve ever felt?

When I stood up to my douche ex as he had a knife pulled on me.

What’s the best case scenario for your future?

I’m a trauma nurse at a level 1 trauma center, hubby is done with nursing school working in his dream unit (either ED or ICU, he changes his mind daily), our son is happy and healthy, if we choose to have a second kiddo that they’re happy and healthy. We own a nice house, with a good sized yard for the 2 and 4 legged babies. 

What’s the worst case scenario for you future?

Uh, I lose my rights to my son, and lose my license. 

What’s the most physical pain you’ve ever felt?

Tie between labor contractions when i was complete/ready to pop the kid out, or when I had nasal surgery and they accidentally “forgot” to give me any pain medication through the whole surgery. Honestly probably the nasal surgery, it was constant, the contractions came and went, frequently, but there was a little break in between. 

What’s the most emotional pain you’ve ever felt?

I’m going to go with when I found out my ex cheated on me and knocked up the girl he cheated with. 

Describe a time you felt like a hypocrite.

I try really hard not to be a hypocrite, I’m sure there’s times it’s happened but I genuinely can’t think of a time off hand. 

Describe a time you felt like a traitor.

I really don’t know. Again, i’m sure there’s been times, but I don’t remember any. 

Describe a time you felt like a hero.

I wouldn’t necessarily say “hero” but when I’m able to help people at work, and when my knowledge and skills benefits them. 

Describe a time you felt inhuman.

This last week. It’s easily one of the hardest things I’ve been through. I felt so detached from my family and I just didn’t care. 

Describe a time you felt like a failure.

This last week. I felt like I was failing as a mom, and that I couldn’t do anything right because I couldn’t even feed my son in the natural way I’m meant to as a female with mammary glands. 

What’s the worst thing you’ve ever done?

Uh. Honestly the only thing that comes to mind is when i skipped a lease with my college roommate (the first time I went to college). It’s genuinely not that bad, but I can’t think of anything else hah. 

What are you proudest of?

My son, my husband, my degree/license. 

What’s your relationship with your family like?

With my husband and son, it’s great (now). With my moms side of the family it’s great as well, I talk to my mom every day, and my gramma and grampa every couple days. I’m also fairly close with my Uncle. My in-laws are pretty good too, my mother in law can get on my nerves but who’s doesn't, honestly hah! I have a decent relationship with my half-brother, Aunt and gramma (Nana) on my dads side, and my cousins. Literally the only one I have issues with is my father and his wife. 

What’s your relationship with religion like?

I think organized religion is a joke. I’m completely against it. I don’t personally believe in God/Jesus/whatever, but I do believe in afterlife and that there is such a thing as past lives and reincarnation. 

Talk about someone you’ve lost.

My grampy died when I was in 4th grade. He was an amazing man. He was very stoic and didn’t show his emotions much, but he always included me in whatever he was doing (fishing, camping, working in the yard, whatever it was). He showed his love in different ways, more with his actions than words. 

Talk about someone who abandoned you.

I think i’ve talked about my dad enough hah 

Talk about a desire you have that scares you.

To become a trauma nurse. 

What’s something you wish you were capable of?

I wish I was able to do more first-responder stuff. I have the ability, just not the time currently. 

What’s something you’re afraid that you’re capable of?

Becoming a trauma nurse hahah 

Describe the kind of life you wish you’d been born into.

Doesn’t everyone wish they had been born into money?? 

Describe your worst heartbreak.

When my dads wife texted me and told me “youre a selfish bitch, and he would be better without you in his life” and he told me I was lying, even with the text proof. I was 14-15ish. That was the final straw, and when I stopped trying to have a relationship with him. 

Describe your worst disappointment.

When I was in nursing school and I failed the full body assessment the first time. I was anxious as fuck and over thinking everything. I technically passed based on points, but was asked to come back and re-do it once I had time to clear my head. 

Have you ever taken a fall for someone?

Taken the blame? No. Own up to your own damn mistakes. 

Have you ever forced or let someone take a fall for you?

No, I take the blame for my own mistakes. 

Have you ever done serious physical harm to someone?

I don’t think so?? 

Have you ever done serious emotional harm to someone?

I hope not, but maybe. 

Have you ever self-harmed?

It’s been about 5 years since, but yes. 

Have you ever attempted suicide?

Attempted no, but had a plan, yes. 

Have you ever stolen something?

On accident when I was like 5 hahah We were in line at the grocery store, an you know they have all the little toys and candy and wtf ever at the check out lanes. Well I was looking at something and mom told me lets go, so I continued looking at it and followed her off. Mom realized, took me back inside to return it and apologize and the manager ripped my ass in front of the check outs. 

Have you ever cheated on someone?

No. 

Have you ever been cheated on?

Yes. 

Have you ever taken revenge on someone?

Nah, people have a way of ruining their own lives. 

Have you ever seriously considered killing someone?

Not had a plan to, but remember my ex threatening my dogs? Had he done it, i’d have attacked him. 

Have you ever betrayed someone who trusted you?

I don’t think so? 

Have you ever experienced something supernatural or unexplainable?

Yeah, I regularly experience things all the time. 

[medea10]

Medea’s Top 10 Saddest Moments in Anime

[qualquercoisa945]

Questions Every Fic Writer Secretly Wants to be Asked - the number 1 (have an amazing day!!)

first of all, thank you anon, and you too!!

second of all, how fucking dare you make me choose shlkjdfhlkjhdsflkjgfd

but uh, in all seriousness (and this is gonna be long so be glad i’m putting a read more here guys like it’s for your own good jskhgkjldhgjfdhkj)

i love all of them honestly!!! 

like, thank you for taking a chance on me was my first ever au that ever grew into something more than just a vague idea (like god i have a Lot of stuff about that au, @the-quiet-winds can absolutely confirm this) and obviously i’m incredibly proud of that, and that story was the first thing i ever wrote for it so i’m lowkey kinda biased

and then when she sees me was pure self indulgence but also one of the very first fics i wrote for the fandom, and even though it’s pretty crappy in hind sight, i’m still hella proud of it because it was one of the very first fics i ever wrote, and also the reason i started talking to julie and @ichlugebulletsandcornnuts if i remember correctly, so it just means a lot to me honestly!! plus i think it was one of the first fics ever posted to focus on one of the ladies in waiting, so although i don’t write about them much anymore, there’s that too!!

faith ain’t no privilege is the longest fic i’ve ever written, and also one that, despite being relatively old by now, i’m still incredibly proud of it!! not to mention, it’s part of @cool-kept​‘s spy au, and she’s one of my closest friends, so i’m also incredibly happy that i got to take a part in it

part 1 of love doesn’t discriminate was one of my favorite fics to write- the transitions were a bit of a struggle at first but i loved it either way, i got to explore a softer side of both cathy and anne, as well as address a topic that i was certainly going to explore eventually- what t***** s****** did to lizzie. also, it was an opportunity to explore how the kids come back into the queens’ lives, and i’m extremely excited for the next few parts

as you watch her go was one of the very first fics i ever wrote, inspired by the first post i ever saw from one of the queens’ social media- aimie’s post about the anniversary of katherine howard’s beheading. a few weeks later, i was talking to a friend about how kitty’s favorite holiday would be valentine’s day, and then i remembered that the anniversary of her beheading would be right the day before. with all that said, i was also interested in exploring kitty and anne’s dynamic, and since at the time most of the content involving anne made her incredibly chaotic, i wanted to explore a softer side to her

with when you’re on your own, i wanted to create a contradiction of sorts, between the inspiration for the title and the contents of the story, since the song when the sun goes down is an incredibly soft love duet, while the story is focused about the thoughts that plague the queens’ minds when they’re alone, despite how hard they try to avoid them. it’s pure character study, and it was incredibly interesting to write. i loved parr’s bit especially, because it allowed me to try and write something from her perspective and with the kind of language she’d use, which was a bit of a struggle, admittedly, but also so much fun

i am high and drunk on ego was another fic focused on one of the queens’ beheading’s anniversaries, this time anne’s, and also this time with me having a much better grasp on the queens’ characterization. writing anne and aragon’s conversation was honestly my favorite part of this entire fic, and even though it was written in a bit of a rush, i fucking loved it man

we see things that nobody else sees was another fic i wrote in a bit of a rush, but it’s one of my favorite pieces either way. it’s much more character study like than my usual fics, but i’d noticed that most people were mainly posting soft headcanons for the kids when they did write for them, so i figured i should address at least some of the trauma they have

pride is not the word i’m looking for is actually part of a (potential) series with fics about the kids, all titled with dear theodosia lyrics because i’m a basic bitch. it’d be based on what the kids are most scared about regarding their moms (so in lizzie’s case, disappointing her and losing her again, though that last one is a bit of a constant throughout all of the kids). i loved writing a more softer side of lizzie with that fic, as well as a gentler side with anne that wasn’t complete shit in terms of characterization (looking at you, as you watch her go)

but honestly? as basic as it sounds, i’m gonna have to say that But It Sure Felt Nice When He Was Holding My Hand, affectionately named the Kitty Snaps Fic. it’s my first ever multi chapter that I’m actually finishing, and i’m so genuinely proud of every single part, and for once i can genuinely say that i mean it when i say that.

burned out was my first ever fic for the six fandom- just a tiny little thing i threw together because @vioislit​ said burned out by dodie was a katherine howard song and i figured i should write something inspired by it. it also served as bit of me ranting through her, though since at the time i hadn’t looked into what aragon had gone through, so i had to avoid the topic. i might end up rewriting this story eventually honestly, because as much as i love it, there are some things that need some improvement

being awfully loud for an introvert is the second installment, titled after monster by, once again, dodie. i didn’t expect burned out to be anything but a one off, angsty one shot, but the more i thought about it, the more i realized that if i did that, it’d be throwing away the perfect opportunity to explore kitty’s dynamics with the other queens. that aside, another title i’d considered for this “we’re both guilty of black and white thinking,” from the same song, highlighting how kitty had completely snapped and wouldn’t hear anything. i also wanted to explore the trauma anne had experienced, since at the time people tended to focus more on the more chaotic, fun loving side of her. this was also another chance to explore the kitty and anne dynamic, this time with kitty being the one of comfort anne

now by shiver, but shiver with a friend, i was noticing a pattern with the titles, and decided to just embrace it and make that the theme- all stories from this fic were going to be titled after dodie songs. and this one in particular was named after party tattoos- me and becca were talking about how well it fit kitty and anna’s friendship, and it was just too perfect.as for the story’s contents themselves, i knew from the start i wanted there to be a flashback. me and jess had talked multiple times about their historical friendship by then, and that coupled with her story, dancing’s not a crime unless you do it without me, made it easy to choose what kind of scene i wanted to write. i also fucking loved getting to write something a bit more cleves centric, and exploring her trauma beyond any self-esteem issues she has was also really fun! finally, this is when you start noticing the build up to the climax of the latest installment. honestly, this one is my favorite out of this fic, if i’m being completely honest. it’s the one story that i don’t think is too short or has bits that fall awkward or just didn’t age as well as i would like it to have, due to me growing as a writer, which isn’t a bad thing by any means, but it’s nice to have a part that stood the test of time honestly

i’m so used to feeling wrong was both one of the easiest and one of the hardest songs to title. i ended up going with rainbow, but another option had been in the middle. ultimately, i went with rainbow because i felt it was better for how both kitty and aragon feel- constantly criticized by everyone around them, and being crushed by a constant sense of being replaceable..as for actually writing it, once again it was both one of the easiest and one of the hardest to write. i don’t have as much experience writing aragon as i would like, but i’d brainstormed a bit about how i thought their dynamic would be like and what similarities and differences they have. the idea of aragon accidentally calling kitty mary comes from jess, and it led way into a bit of a character study bit that i’m still pretty proud of honestly

and last but definitely not least, these new walls are pretty hard to crack. the title inspiration for this one was arms unfolding, and in all honesty, this one was easily the hardest to title. almost every line in this song would be a great title, but ultimately i settled on the one i did, and i’m pretty happy about it honestly! it’s about how being reincarnated likely made the queens put up more walls instead of less, and it’s just,,,,,,, idk man i just love this title a lotas for the story, this was one that i have had planned since, i wanna say back when i first wrote the anne chapter. it wasn’t part of this story at first, but then i started building the story up more, and it just fit too well. i’d been wanting to tackled parr and kitty’s relationship for a while now, and while i still have some stuff in the works, i’m pretty proud of how this one turned out!! i’m looking forward to sharing the last part of this story with you all 💖💙💖💙

[rational-mastermind]

I’ve been meaning to make a review about Breath of the Wild for a while, but at least wanted to wait until after I finished the shrines.

SCREW. THAT.

I’m gonna just say it up front; it’s not one of my favorite Zelda games. I mean, yeah, I have a personal history with Majora’s Mask, but that’s not the only thing. I’ll start at the beginning, under the cut. Cause this is gonna be long-winded.

I’m not gonna make a lot of complaints about how it sucks in comparison to Ocarina of Time or make too many mentions about the timeline issue, cause we all know that it was bullshit since the moment they said anything. But there are just...so many things that bother me.

I will say that Breath of the Wild has a lot of great thing going for it and it’s easy to be impressed when you first sit down to play it. The graphics are gorgeous and the voice acting was done very well. There are so many wonderful little bits of lore, call-backs, and even general mechanics of the game that just made everything amazing. (I was so fucking excited to jump without running off a ledge.)

However...there was a lot of the story itself that bothered me. Not to mention a few other things. One of which, was the music. Or....serious lack thereof.

One of the things I loved the most about Zelda, was the music in nearly every game. Background music is very essential in making up the environment of any level. From your typical fire temple, to underwater, to creepy ghost town. And for Zelda, it wasn’t even just that, but that song itself had a large to-do with a lot of the lore and story. Song tells others you have something to do with the Royal Family. It changes the universe around you. It soothes the dead. Not just in Ocarina of Time either. So it was really weird to...not have any of that in Breath of the Wild.

Yeah, we have some soundtrack but..it felt so..threadbare. When you go into a shrine/town/battle, I barely register the music. Walking through the open field...nothing. When I’m galloping on the Lord of the Mountain, the fast-paced piano feels more high-tech than race-horse and makes me feel uneasy about a guardian lurking nearby. Then when you DO face a guardian, or any mini-boss of a monster, it gets so fucking intense, so damn fast, I was worried about challenging a Hinox for the longest damn time. (Geez, I felt stupid for that after I realized how easy they were to beat.) Everything just felt...off. And it was weird that you didn’t have to repeat any song 10 fucking times. I mean, yeah, I was really sick of Elegy of Emptiness after going through the Stone Tower in Majora’s Mask, but I’ll listen to the 50th remix of Song of Storms. It was like...one of the few things that kept the whole timeline thing connected. It was that there was always a harp, there was always a song, there was just...something that connected us to the higher powers. And it’s kinda cool for a game to give something like music, so much power.

But I’ll stop bitching about that and get to my real problem. The story.

Now the basic crux of it, I’m fine with. They attempted to beat Ganon, failed, and had to pay the price 100 years later. Cool. That’s interesting. A nice premise. But gosh DAMN if the details don’t fucking trip me up! Let’s run through this chronologically.

Okay so Zelda, being the nerdy princess that she is in this life, discovers that yeah, they reincarnate every several hundred years and beat an evil known as Ganon. There’s supposed to be her, the physical embodiment of the goddess Hylia, and Link, a young knight sworn to protect her. Hooray, self-awareness.

Apparently, she also discovers that, what was it? 1,000 years ago, the Sheikah... the shadow people who are skilled ninjas that protect the family...built 120 shrines, robots, and massive weapons of terrible destruction...just to help beat this one guy that two kids and a magic sword handles on a regular basis. Actually no, I shouldn’t just say it’s two kids and a magic sword.

It’s a knight with a magic sword, three pendants, six sages, and the final seventh sage (aka the fucking goddess-child) that defeat the Evil.

It’s already upsetting enough that the Sheikah are stupidly advanced in technology (cause ancient magic tech from the gods is always the way to go...), and that the 1,000 year span makes the whole timeline thing confusing as FUCK (even if it is in the broken world timeline), but that they just...do that. They just fucking dissed the fucking premise for like, so many of the games. You find three pendants/orbs/stones/things, the master sword, six sages, and then help Zelda. Thanks for reducing everything else to nothing. Thanks for making 6 sages fucking nobodies. And yeah, I’m gonna harp on that.

One of the things that was nice about Ocarina of Time is that the 6 Sages became one from each race. In Link to the Past, it was the descendants of 6 powerful wizards. In Wind Waker, it was at least the last 2 other species left alive after the whole flooding incident (cause those three gorons are gonna fucking die and I wanna cry thinking about it). It just...it made sense.

So why. The fuck. ARE WE RELYING ON ONLY THESE FOUR????

We still have the Sheikah and the Koroks. What, just cause Impa’s old now? Cause the Korok’s are tiny as fuck? That never stopped anything before. We could’ve had Purah, or Paya take up the mantle. If size was an issue, how about Hetsu? Koroks can choose their shapes and try to put on brave faces. Saria was willing to help with the fight. Makar was willing to go through a whole temple to help. I don’t see what makes this generation a bunch of pussies! What the great and all-knowing fucking Sheikah just..FORGOT about the other sages???

Like, don’t get me wrong. Again, there’s a lot of good. I wouldn’t say gorons would be my favorite race but dammit I love Daruk and I love his grandson. They’re just sweet and adorable as fuck. (and I have a weakness for soft-hearted big-guys. ^//^) I’m glad they fixed the Rito’s appearance (though I hate Rivali’s fucking attitude). I liked their stories and their powers. But you could’ve at least rounded it out to be EVERYBODY. And further more, as great as it was to see their spirits put to rest, it doesn’t make a lot of sense for ghosts to pilot giant robots. It could’ve made a bit more sense for maybe the later generations to take up the mantle and help out. (Since that’s what a lot of them seem to imply.) It would’ve been kinda cool to go through the Divine Beasts with the Next Gen and let them help us fight the blights and let them take control.

Also on a fashion note: WHY THE FUCK IS EVERYTHING BLUE?? Thanks for dissing Farore. I guess she wasn’t a very important Goddess! Certainly not the one that LINK correlates to. Yeah, I get it, he’s supposed to get his signature outfit later, but I’m gonna get back to that problem in a bit. You could’ve at least kept the design and made it fucking GREEN.

Cause yeah, I get it, it was supposed to signify their unity and shit and that’s great and all, but BLUE had a purpose and that was WISDOM. Link isn’t WISDOM. He’s COURAGE. That was the whole rite of passage thing in Wind Waker!

Also, Zelda. Zelda, babe. Hon.

Zelda... What the FUCK ARE YOU WEARING???

Like, DAMN girl’s got hips for DAYS but do we really need the thicc shown in fucking leggings?? I mean, okay, her normal princess outfit is fine. Would’ve liked it to be a liiiiitle more traditional, but whatever. You look the part. And her normal adventure outfit is...okay?? It doesn’t look very practical nor comfortable for travels so it seems a little weird?? It just looks really uncomfortably tight and really draws attention to the thighs. But see, it’s the fucking Goddess getup that I have the most problems with.

Like, I’m just gonna start with saying that she looks fucking pregnant.

The empire waist wasn’t a good choice, especially cause she’s already just so damn thicc. And then you mix it with a sleeveless top and you have these fucking layers that just exaggerate the hips in the most unflattering way possible. I’m not saying she needs to look sexy but for a goddess, she could’ve looked more elegant? I’m sure with some kinda alterations, this would’ve looked great, or maybe on a different body, but like! I don’t like the dress for Skyward Sword either but at least she looks more goddess-like than this! (and that was a VERY boring dress...) She looks like Ariel putting on that sail cloth when she turned human. I mean, she could’ve had like, three-quarter sleeves with a v-neck or sweetheart neckline and then let the skirt flare out with the Hylian buckle around the waist. But this looks.. it just looks uncomfortable. I wouldn’t wanna practice goddess magic in this either.

So aside from forgetting about important races and a lack in fashion design, then you move on with the story. So since Zelda’s such a nerd and cause she lost her mother when she was younger, I guess that means I should feel sorry for her long-ass struggle with her goddess powers but um... I’m not. I don’t feel sorry for this woman. I just feel annoyed. I feel very annoyed every time I run all over Hyrule, trying to find these fucking memories, only to get five minutes of her bitching at US for her own failure.

Link is a soldier. And on top of that, he’s burdened with the heavy duty of carrying the Master Sword. HE is the one who has to fight Ganon. And instead he just runs around escorting Princess Twilight Sparkle while she geeks out over learning and frogs and then insults him, yells at him, and pushes him away from doing HIS FUCKING JOB. Unlike her, LINK IS DOING HIS JOB. I don’t blame him for shutting the hell up while she bitches and cries. I’m gonna side with Zelda’s father on this one, she found out about the prophecy, but SHE NEEDS TO DO HER JOB. Not for the sake of reputation (which seemed unusually dickish for him to say....) but because that’s her damn job. Everyone else knew what it meant to be a soldier. They knew when to dig in their heels and get ready to fight. WHY. DIDN’T. SHE?? Or at least why didn’t we see her trying like she kept talking about?? Yeah we saw her pray to ONE FUCKING FOUNTAIN. And it wasn’t even supposed to be her damn goddess! The whole mess wouldn’t have happened if she had just SHUT THE HELL UP and thought about someone else besides her own problems.

Also, if you were gonna show the tender moment where she finally does unleash her powers, maybe you SHOULDN’T make that a “secret ending” after you run around and try to guess where the rest of the memories were based on poor-quality pictures. And yeah, Zelda. you took a lot of shoddy pictures with that damn tablet. HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO DIFFERENTIATE ONE FOREST FROM A THOUSAND OTHERS??

Maybe I would’ve felt more sorry if I didn’t have to climb through a fucking castle full of guardians, avoid tripping the cut scene, and THEN read in a long-ass diary about her mother dying, but you know, that just didn’t happen. I don’t feel sorry for her. I don’t feel excited for her to unleash her powers. Actually, I’m rather sad that despite the games being called “Legend of Zelda”, I REALLY didn’t wanna focus on THIS incarnation of her. The idea of it would’ve been fucking fantastic, but did Nintendo really have to make her such a whiny bitch?

Okay okay okay. Now before you send me hate mail, I will point out some things I like about her. She had a nice voice. She was cute (in a good outfit). And she wasn’t a total bitch. It was a good idea for Nintendo to try to focus on the titular character for once. I just don’t see this excusing all the other problems though.

Moving on, I mentioned earlier how I hated Rivali. That was the understatement. I am so glad he fucking died at the hands of one of the easiest damn bosses. I know some people may have liked him but I can’t stand ego. It’s an immediate turn-off and the sad part is that he had a sexy design and voice. He could’ve been redeemable if he showed some kinda humility after being dead for 100 years, but no. They just...didn’t give him that. Not willingly at least. Again, this is where I would’ve LOVED the next generation to take up the mantle instead, but... Yeah. No. We didn’t get that. (And I swear he was jealous that Link had Mipha and Zelda’s affections. Especially Zelda’s.)

Urbosa was good, but I felt like we didn’t get to know her personality too much? And the same goes for her grandchild. Also even though the Gerudo are known for hating men, they HAVE accepted men into their clans before. What happens if these women marry?? They have to leave town? Link was genuinely accepted as one of the Gerudo in OoT and was free to walk around! And that was just for debunking their strongest warriors. BotW!Link saved the whole fucking town, saved one from dehydration and another’s husband, and is a renowned champion! You think that would give him a get-out-of-jail free card!

I already talked about how I liked Daruk cause he’s definitely a strong leader and a gentle-soul. I do like the Goron City but it feels a little weird how....corporate they became. I mean, it makes sense. They can make a good profit from the gems they harvest but it’s still a little weird considering how tribal and relaxed the gorons were before. Still, they were a cute bunch and I really liked going to Goron City again.

And Mipha was sweet and I really loved her one-sided relationship with Link. I felt really sad thinking about Sidon growing up without his sister and I see why everyone shipped him with Link. Sidon himself was pretty good but....personal preference dictates that a super excited, extroverted, supportive type...doesn’t suite me. Don’t get me wrong. He’s very sweet and cute and I can see why a lot of fangirls were into him. It’s just the over-exuberant extrovertedness that gets to me. Also I was really surprised that this game made the ZORAS racist, out of all of them. I mean like, fucking damn... I know your princess died but fuck! Finally, last note, I...really didn’t care for their designs. I know the Zoras have been through a hell of a lot of redesigns over the years and they’ve certainly improved, but I think Ocarina of Time’s era was just enough of Fish and Human to make it a good hybrid? Rather than making...a shark..humanoid...with another shark...on his head?? And somehow related to a whale??? With a...manta ray...for an advisor.. I mean, I get it, he was suppose to look old, but it’s literally just a stingray on his head.

I liked Hetsu too, though collecting korok seeds is kinda annoying. I hate it when games make you have to gather more for just one thing, it’s just..not a fun mechanic to have? And the koroks themselves are still cute, though it’s taken me a while to accept that they replaced my beloved Kokiri and Dekus. (I only had OoT/MM growing up, so when I finally played Wind Waker as an adult, yeah I was pretty upset about the change in the species.) I still wish they had a bigger role to play in all of this.

Lastly, Ganon had a pretty great design, though it was a little weird he was like...semi-solid for this game. Like.. What? What was with all the...”malice”? (Which is an actual word, guys. You could’ve called it something besides that...) I really liked how he merged himself with the technology and it was interesting that he was controlling the guardians, but honestly when she said “Given up incarnation” I was a little disappointed he still went by Ganon cause you know... His original form wasn’t called Ganon. It was called Demise. Also for having a giant smoke-pig with a huge gaping mouth hovering around the castle, it would’ve been a little more interesting for him to...still retain that when you walked in? But design aside, fighting Ganon wasn’t actually all that hard after you freed the Divine Beasts and it’s...a little disappointing. I mean, I’m running around, fighting lynels and dragons and guardians and really, I had more trouble with THOSE than I did with HIM. And that’s REALLY disappointing when Ganon is the long-standing Ultimate Bad Guy (tm) and I was REALLY looking forward to feeling more accomplished beating him than I did when I beat a silver-maned lynel.

Finally some last complaints:

I wish the Sheikahs didn’t have their hands in everything. Who said that THEY should determine who Goddess Hylia’s chosen hero should be? Why were THEY the advanced race when you have one that harvests iron on a regular basis? And I hate that they don’t have any actual temples cause one of the things I liked about the whole thing is that there was a running religion and the Sages and Temples actually had some significance? Even though it’s pointless, I like history and archeological search in a game, even if I’m the only one doing it for my own amusement, cause it just helps me to connect more to the world that I’m playing in but I don’t get that when I walk into a weird-ass abyssal room with small puzzles or fights.

Also there are seriously WAY too many fucking shrines. None of them make any sort of callback to old games. The spirit orb system is confusing cause if that’s a callback to Skyward Sword, then at least say it was by Link’s own doing and not these dead monks that have been preserved in suspended animation for 100 years. Why didn’t Link do the shrines to start with 100 years ago? Also I HATE that you have to collect 4 spirit orbs for hearts or stamina. I mean, we all know stamina sucks, but this just making it REALLY obvious? And seriously it was so fucking easy to die early on into the game, especially if you ran out of stamina or were still fumbling with the new controls.

Why didn’t he ask more questions in this game? If you have voice acting, why didn’t you actually give Link any dialogue? I think that would’ve made a stronger impact for Zelda to get her powers or something.

Seriously the three dragons bug the shit out of me. I know they were supposed to represent the goddesses and it was really cool to first come across them and shit but 1) it’s really hard to keep up with any of them. 2) they don’t really add anything to the plot. 3) was Zelda supposed to pray to a dragon?? 4) Did the dragons from Skyward Sword just like...de-evolve? (devolve?) Cause they spoke and wore clothes??? Why didn’t these??? 5) (and this goes to Skyward Sword too) why is the one who represents the fucking forests, you know, FARORE, have lightning powers? I think Pokemon already took the cake with mythical creatures representing Fire, Ice, and Lightning. This would’ve been better with Fire, Water, and Grass, y’know?

I fucking cringe looking at the map cause it feels like so much it just out of place... Like, how do you move a whole Forest from the south to the north? Why is the volcano moved like, way far to the back? The WHOLE Lake Hylia was moved like, so far from the original spot. Really the only things that stayed in place was Hyrule Castle and Gerudo Desert.

Also don’t give us giant skeletons and then NOT ACTUALLY EXPLAIN WHAT THEY REALLY ARE. Leviathan is not just a blanket term for Giant-Ass-Monster. Was that the Dodongo King at the volcano? The Sky Dragon from Skyward Sword?? What the fuck froze to death? Why was that and the one in the desert more similar the one at the fucking volcano??

Seriously your mini bosses shouldn’t be harder than the Ultimate Bad Guy. The blights were harder and I especially had trouble with the lynels and guardians. And seriously WHY was there a fucking guardian on the fucking Plateau?? I was fucking terrified of these killer robots and it’s seriously unfair that I barely ever get any proper armor or shields to deal with them! Also seriously, why did there have to be a whole graveyard of them right underneath a stupidly challenging maze??

Also I don’t mind teleporting everywhere in a game, but when there’s literally secrets over every last inch of this game (from shrines to korok seeds to weapons, food, and needed pictures) it gets REALLY boring to travel on foot. Especially when climbing mountains in freezing conditions. I mean, I love that it’s so open-world and I love that we get to go exploring whatever we want, but there are a few problems with that. The other being that it’s hard to follow the plot of a game when you hardly have any reason to go do it or to follow any intended order. I did Rivali last, not because I wanted to, but because I didn’t bother to explore that side of the map until it was all that was left. I WISHED SOMEONE SAID SOMETHING EARLIER IN THE GAME CAUSE THE GALE WOULD’VE HELPED TREMENDOUSLY.

Finally I swear someone on the staff has a giant fetish, and not that there’s a problem with that? But can we have ONE game where the Great Fairies aren’t horrifying to look at?? Like, if some people like it, fine, I guess? But gosh damn these bitches just look so GAUDY. There’s too much glittering, there’s too much...just too much everything. Also you should be able to up all your armor, not just a few things? It would’ve been awesome to walk around as Shadow Link and have it upped to be at least decently protective.

Okay.. I think I’m done complaining. Now I’ll stop my own bitching and actually give the game its proper praise.

The game does have some amazingly gorgeous graphics and it blows me away every fucking time. When it does want to intimidate you, it does so very well. And so many things were designed so well. Despite earlier complaints, I love how the dragons were designed to vary from one to another. I love how all the baddies were designed. I love the large array of wardrobe that you get for Link and it’s so much fun to change his looks and dye them different colors. (though, again, you should be able to dye the Champions tunic to GREEN.)

Some of the characters were fun and had some great personalities. I liked the bits of lore this game generated. I also loved whatever small callbacks it did make (like mentioning Naboru, and Makar’s island). I liked that you could catch and ride so many things and it’s fun that there’s a motorcycle (I haven’t unlocked that yet, but I’m sure it’ll be fun ^^). It was fun exploring different worlds within this game and just really see some of these beloved races expand and grow and see how the world is affected by such an apocalypse.

I like hunting for your food and surviving that way rather than random hearts coming out of the grass. The whole sense of survival is pretty awesome and thrilling. It’s fun to discover things in this world and it’s fun to just go around, explore, and make up your own adventure. (I just wish there was a bit  more guiding for the story...)

Some of the reactions in this game are so much fun. Like walking up to people naked, or riding the Lord of the Mountain to any stable. Actually that entire story about the Lord of the Mountain is really sweet and heartwarming. But the actually dialogue that’s written into this game is really fun and pretty spot-on.

I really liked the side mission of buying your own(old?) house and creating an entire village from the ground up. It was such a sweet side-story to the whole thing and was a lot of fun to to. The other side mission of helping the korok through the woods was super cute. ^^ It was little moments like these that really did make me enjoy the game. And I did like being able to stumble into Zelda’s room or study and read about her life in the past, seeing her figure out Link and such.

And the challenges of conquering the Divine Beast was actually fun, but again, would’ve liked a bit more direction. Actually getting through this game was kinda fun, but it was easy for the magic to get sapped out of everything with stupid shit.

Overall, I wouldn’t say this was the worst Zelda game. Heaven know Skyward Sword did much worse. It could’ve been better though and that’s what really makes me sad. I was really looking forward to playing something new and amazing, especially having just finished Wind Waker for the first time before it and was honestly, disappointed after the magic of the new features wore off. It wasn’t the best. But it wasn’t the worst. It just really needed some work on in a few areas. Over all I would rate it 7/10.

[taewithblackhair]

Favourite Taekook fics list

♡ Abaddon’s Waltz

by Eclairdeluxe

Tags: AU!, Knifeplay, Bloodplay, Exhibitionism, Pyromania, Sociopathy, Blow Jobs, Marking, Anal Sex, Barebacking, Wax Play, Dysfunctional Relationships, Sadomasochism, Rough Sex, Risk Aware Consensual Kink, Dark Themes, Cheating, Minor Character Death, Violence, Sedatives, Manipulation, References to Child Abuse/Neglect, Switch!Taekook

Description:

Hell hath no fury like a lover scorned.

♡ All I Want (Is Nothing More)

by Lethallergic

Tags:  Explicit Sexual Content, Top!JK

Description:

“Okay, but really, you would look so hot driving in a Lambo.”

♡ Blind me or bind me

by AnonymousXJWIFE

Tags: Sugar Daddy!AU, Daddy Kink, Spanking, Smut, Slut Shaming, Double Penetration, Sex Toys, Light Dom/Sub, Rimming, Barebacking, Money play, PWP, Crossdressing, Angst, Feminization, Minor Violence, Minor Character Death, Top!JK

Description:

Taehyung is just looking for something to fill the empty void in his heart and Jungkook only has money to offer. 

Or 

Taehyung offers his body for his Sugar Daddy Jungkook. ‘This isn’t a place where people fall in love.’

♡ Blooms of the Pomegranate Tree

by Merelypretty

Tags: Persephone!Taehyung, Hades!Jeongguk, Slow Burn, Greek Mythology!AU, Mild Smut, Top!JK

Description:

Taehyung was born into nature. As the God of Spring, he is destined to give life back to the earth, spending his days making the flowers bloom and the meadows flourish. All his life, he’s been convinced that the Gods of the Underworld can only mean disaster; they bring death in their wake, which completely contradicts the work he puts forth in order to keep things alive. Still, he finds no reason that he can’t get along with Jeongguk, who is nice despite the deadly world he was born into. Your origins don’t define you - this is what Taehyung believes. It’s be so much easier if their parents thought the same.

♡ Bubblegum Bitch

by Snowmoney

Tags: Fake Dating!AU, Fashion Magazine!AU, Romance, Hate to Love, High Heels, Tattoos, Top!JK

Description:

Jungkook is but a simple delivery boy; the last thing he needs is a high maintenance fake boyfriend.

♡ Cold hands and sleepless nights

by TBZ

Tags: Vampires, Romance, Angst, Fluff, Smut, Violence, Kinks, Biting, Blood Drinking, Choking, Breathplay, Bondage, Handcuffs, Blindfolds, Hair-pulling, BDSM, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Cock Rings, Dry Orgasms, Vibrators, Masturbation, Top!JK, Magic, Pain & Suffering, Rimming, Barebacking, Praise Kink, Dominance, Explicit Sexual Content

Description:

The night breathed with deathless whispers and crawled with the underlying smell of blood. Little wisps of the faintest hints of the metallic tang ghosted through the air at times, but swelled into a leaden blanket of the stench without warning. Taehyung wondered if the smell would go away, too. Or maybe the scent of blood had long since coateed the inside of his nostrils and dripped down into his lungs.

♡ How about it, officer?

by TBZ

Tags: Eventual Romance, Smut, AU, Police Officer!JK, Handcuffs, Public Blow Jobs, Masturbation, Car Sex, Semi-Public Sex, Explicit Sexual Content, Top!JK, Sexual Tension

Description:

“He’s- I- wow. He’s... something else.” Jungkook managed to get out weakly, but honestly, what would he say to that? He shouldn’t even be surprised at the shit Taehyung pulled at this point. Jimin rolled his eyes, shaking his head as he took another vicious bite into his apple. “Tell me about it. Namjoon got mad because this is like the seventh time he’s had to seriously consider getting psychatric help for the other people in that cell, to help them overcome P-Tae-SD.”

♡ Hustlers

by TBZ

Tags: Gambling, Cards, Hustlers, Mobs, Money, AU, Drama, Romance, Action, Violence, Smut, Betrayal, Fluff, Domestic Violence, Heavy Angst, Dom!JK, Explicit Sexual Content, Begins with Top!Tae but after only Top!JK

Description:

Jungkook hadn’t meant to lose nine million. He certainly hadn’t meant to lose his kidney. And he hadn’t meant to meet Kim Taehyung.

♡ If I Let Go Of Your Hand...

by Taehansik

Tags: Reincarnation!AU, Fantasy, Angst, Happy Ending, Explicit Sexual Content, Time Loop, Dark Magic, Third Person POV, Eternal Love, Power Bottom!Tae

Description:

Jungkook is not going to stop searching for answers until he knows that Taehyung can be safe in his arms; alive, breathing, smiling, and the both of them can finally do what they’ve never been able to do before: Live.

♡ I’m Feeling Electric Tonight

by Mindheist

❀ Part 1: Kiss Me Hard Before You Go

    Tags: Fake Dating!AU, Top!JK

    Description:

    Dramatization. Do not try at home.

❀ Part 2: I Just Wanted You To Know (That Baby, You’re The Best)

    Tags: Angst

    Description:

    If you experience headaches, nausea, or heartbreak, discontinue use and       talk to your doctor because relationships might not be right for you.

❀ Part 3: Think I’ll Miss You Forever

    Tags: Taehyung & Bogum smut scene, Angst

    Description:

    Happy endings sold separately.

♡ Keep the water warm

by Sassyneki

Tags: Stepsiblings!AU, University, Smut, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Family Issues, Pining, Emotional Constipation, Slow Burn, Rimming, Switch!Taekook, Hate to Love, Barebacking, Attempted Sexual Assualt, Wall Sex, Vibrators, Implied/referenced Homophobia

Description:

“Get the fuck out of this room, Kim Taehyung!” The last thing Taehyung expected this summer was to meet his new family, but as with all things, he’s willing to give it a shot. He’s willing to try. Too bad his new stepbrother doesn’t feel the same way.

♡ Loving easy

by Aeterisks

Tags: College/University!AU, Cheerleader!Taehyung, Punk!Jungkook, Flirting, First Dates, Light Angst, Misunderstandings, Top!JK, Blow Jobs, Handjobs, Rimming, Barebacking, Fluff, Smut

Description:

After two years of being a cheerleader, Taehyung has come to know all the people who usually attend the basketball games. So obviously, he wouldn’t fail to notice him. 

♡ Lupus Tales

by Kpopismydrug

❀ Part 1: Lupi

    Tags: Wolves!AU, Mild Language, Slow Build

    Description:

    This is one summer break that Taehyung will never forget. From dealing         with a moody mare that likes to think she’s a stroppy teenager rather than       a horse, to dealing with childhood memories that threaten to choke him,         Taehyung will soon find out that when you take a trip down memory lane,       some things are more than just memories.

❀ Part 2: Just Us

    Tags: Mild Language, Sexual Content, Homophobic Language,                       Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Wolves!AU

    Description:

    Winter break was meant to be the time for Taehyung to return back to the       pack, to relax at the farmhouse, to roam with the pack like he had done           during the summer nights, and to also deal with a certain stroppy mare that     still likes to torment his poor boyfriend. However, he was not at all                   expecting this winter break to turn out the way it did.

❀ Part 3: Us vs Them

    Tags: Wolves!AU, Mild Language, Death, Violence, Fluff, Angst

    Description:

    Sometimes, we need to root ourselves, to find strength in the face of fear,       and to face what wants to tear us down.

❀ Part 4: Believe

❀ Part 5: My Lupi

    Tags: Wolves!AU, Angst, Mild Language, Sexual Content, Fluff, Top!JK

    Description:

    No matter what is thrown at him, no matter if it is Lupus or Mundane that         come and try to push Taehyung away from Jungkook and Jimin, they can       come and try, because Taehyung is a scrappy fighter and he isn’t scared to     fight dirty. So, let them try. But he’ll never leave or forget them again.               They’re his family now.

❀ Part 6: One of Us

    Tags: Wolves!AU, Twisted & Fluffy Feelings, Fluff

    Description:

    When you’re about to meet your mate’s and his best friend’s pack-born, it’s     only fair for you to feel like you’re about to either a) have a panic attack or       b) have a panic attack.

❀ Part 7: In Sickness and Health

    Tags: Wolves!AU, Fluff

    Description:

    In sickness and health, family stands together.

❀ Part 8: Through My Eyes

    Tags: Wolves!AU, Angst, Fluff, Sexual Content

    Description:

    Everyone has a story to tell. Are you ready to hear it from the beginning?

♡ Mama called me destructive (said it’d ruin me one day)

by Eclairdeluxe

Tags: Organized Crime, Boss!JK, Minor Character Death, Anal Fingering, Rimming, Anal Sex, Dom/Sub undertones, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Dysfunctional Relationships, Antisocial Personality Disorder, Dark Themes, Top!JK

Description:

In his realm of destruction and deceit, Kim Taehyung is the closest thing he comes to understanding about love.

♡ Maybe we can be (each other’s company)

by Foolishbangtan

Tags: Idol!AU, Fanacc!AU, Smut, Insecurity, Explicit Language, Platonic!Vmin, Fluff, Dom/Sub, Hurt, Comfort, Angst, Side polyamory, Top!JK

Description:

In which Jeongguk is an idol, and Taehyung is a dedicated fan account.

♡ Oh Darling, Stand By Me

by Beatitudinem

Tags: AU, Royalty, Werewolves, Were-Creatures, Princes, Arranged Marriage, War Aftermath, A/B/O Dynamics, Power Dynamics, Getting Together, Strangers to Lovers, Prince!Tae, Prince!JK, Omega!Tae, Alpha!JK, Shapeshifting, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Original Lycan Lore, Traditions, Ceremonies, Festivities, Courting, Explicit Sexual Content, Biting Kink, Marking, Praise Kink, Aftercare, Slow Burn, Resolved Sexual Tension, Fluff, Angst, Winter Setting, Mountains, Forests, Snow, Supernatural Elements, Violence

Description:

Kim Taehyung had never coped well when there was an angry alpha around, no matter that he wasn’t the object of their fury. Wisely choosing to keep his mouth shut, he ignored the flaring annoyance building up inside his chest at being treated like a frail and delicate porcelain doll who didn’t know any better, once again. He wasn’t frail. He wasn’t delicate. And he also wasn’t anywhere near ignorant. “And how do you suggest we do that?” Alpha Jeon asked eventually, tiredly taking a seat when he realized Alpha Kim was not about to open his mouth any time soon. “How else, Alpha Jeon,” Alpha Park said easily, an eerie smile taking over her lips as she regarded both the kings levelly, “Just like we have sealed over alliances with one another, of course.”

♡ One Time’s A Charm

by NastaeTae

❀ Part 1: Pink Sweaters

     Tags: High School!AU, Fluff, No Angst, Smut, Blowjobs, Porn with Plot,             Rimming, Underage Drinking, Ageswap, Top!JK

     Description:

     They say that opposites attract in the best way possible. Kim Taehyung            didn’t mean to make Jeon Jeongguk question his sexuality, but he did.            And Jeon Jeongguk sure as hell didn’t mean to make Kim Taehyung fall in      love with him, but look where they end up.

❀ Part 2: Kill Cams and Knee Highs

     Tags: Blowjobs, Rimming, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Masturbation, High              School!AU, Game Night, Smut, Barebacking, Multiple Orgasms,                      Established Relationship, Ageswap, Top!JK

     Description:

     Two senior boys left alone on a Saturday night with video games doesn’t        sound like a bad idea to Jeongguk’s parents, especially when their son is        straight as a board. Little do they know that Kim Taehyung made Jeon            Jeongguk question his sexuality two years ago.

❀ Part 3: I Got Lost In You(r eyes)

    Tags: Age Swap, Hurt/Comfort, College/University!AU, Excessive Drinking,      Vhope - freeform, Smut, Anal Sex, Angst, Top!JK

    Description:

    The earth is surrounded by a universe that doesn’t care, and filled with           people that do. When something is out of place, the universe will correct it,     no matter what the cost.

❀ Part 4: Come inside, or you’ll catch a cold

    Tags: Emotional Healing, Time Skips, Flirting, Modern Setting!AU, Smut,          Top!JK

    Description:

    It’s during times of 4AM thinking or after too many glasses of wine that he       starts to believe that the Universe is against him. Maybe Taehyung is right.     When he’s standing out in the rain on an early Sunday morning, he can’t         help but wonder if the Universe really does hate him.

♡ Only Breathing - Aquiver

by Sharleena

Tags:  Gangsters/Criminals!AU, Prostitute!Taehyung, Runner!Jungkook, Explicit Sexual Content, Explicit Language, Gunplay, Breathplay, Implied Referenced Rape, Angst, Fluff, Smut, Twisted & Fluffy Feelings, side Yoonmin, Druglord!Yoongi, Top!JK

Description:

Like all things about Taehyung, being loved by him is loud, messy and familiar. Under lilac neon lights his hair is a shade lighter and his skin is gold, Jungkook’s hands tremble when he touches it and Taehyung keeps mixing weird sauces in his ramen. “Do you still quiver when I touch you?” “Always.” This is a prequel/spinoff of Only Breathing.

♡ Our Red Scarf (Keep Me Warm)

by MirreRover

Tags: College!AU, Fuckbuddies, Angst, Smut, Explicit Language, Bad Boy!JK, Top!JK

Description:

Jeongguk is trouble. Taehyung likes trouble a bit more than he probably should. Just don’t tell Jimin about it.

♡ Overtones

by Coley_merrin

Tags: Vampire!AU, Angst, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Depression, Anxiety, Self-Sacrifice, Smut, Fluff, Top!Tae

Description:

As a vampire, Taehyung’s life is full of walls and restrictions. Jungkook is a temptation and a risk, someone who could take Taehyung’s eternity, even as he could steal Jungkook’s future.

♡ Promises to Keep (and Miles to Go Before We Sleep)

by TrappingLightningBugs

Tags: A/B/O Dynamics, Werewolf!AU, Alpha!JK, Misunderstandings, Slow Burn, Sexual Tension, Anal Fingering, Blow Jobs, Come Marking, Fluff, Smut, Claiming Bites, Knotting, Top!JK

Description:

Taehyung stumbles into the world of werewolves when an injured puppy catches his attention one day as a child. Jungkook is a fascination, a good friend, and an alpha -- and Taehyung has been his since the moment he laid eyes on him.

♡ Purple Constellations

by Lili95276

Tags: Angst, Smut, Abuse, Blow Jobs, Photographer!JK, Drama Major!Tae, College!AU, Masturbation, Rape, Non-con Elements, Infidelity

Description:

Because Taehyung is a knot and Jeongguk would give blood and bones just to unravel him.

♡ Quiescent

by NastaeTae

Tags: Enemies to Lovers, Explicit Sexual Content, Explicit Language, Fluff, Drama, Angst, Magic!AU, Prostate Milking, Rimming, Oral Sex, Semi-Drunk Sex, Smut, Referenced Past Tragedy, Romance, Mpreg, Top!JK

Description:

When you’ve run out of Earth and find yourself at the Edge of Time, just know that I’ll be here hidden among the stars, waiting for the day that you give yourself to the night sky. For I am you, yet you are not me because baby, you’re an enigma.

♡ Race Against Time

by Joyous1369

Tags: Hospital!AU, Major Character Death, Angst, Eventual Smut, Fluff, Top!JK

Description:

“There’s a new boy. His name’s Jungkook. Jeon Jungkook.”

♡ Reborn in Water

by TrappingLightningBugs

Tags: Strangers to Lovers, Masturbation, Magical Realism, Naiad!Taehyung, Nature Spirits!AU, Accidental Arranged Marriage, Wet Dream, Siren!Yoongi, Mermaid!Jin, Mermaid!Hoseok, Light Angst, Long-Distance Relationship, Fluff & Smut, Top!JK

Description:

Freshly graduated from high school, Jungkook loses his class ring in the nearby lake, and despite the fact that his parents would be super pissed, it’s not that big of a deal. That is, until a stranger decides to appear in his bath one night, wearing his ring.

♡ Run Away With Me

by Buttstrife

Tags: A/B/O Dynamics, Alpha!JK, Omega!Tae, Canon Compliant, Underage Drinking, Scent Marking, Knotting, Explicit Sexual Content, Explicit Language, Mating Cycles, In Heat, Top!JK

Description:

When Jungkook and Taehyung get completely shit-faced drunk, they ‘accidentally’ form a bond -- only problem is that they are idols and an alpha/omega bond between two group members is the worst kind of scandal they can envision.

♡ Shifting on my feet

by MarionetteFtHJM

Tags: Shifters!AU, Police!AU, Violence, Action, OC(s), Jungkook-centric, Undercover, Kinky Smut, Top!JK, Angst, Gangs & Maffia, Fluff, Past Relationship(s), Past Character Death, Past Child Abuse, One Jikook Smut Scene

Description:

With the ever-growing crime rate in the city there’s no telling what the leading figures will do to remain leading. The safety of the people is at risk and the possible collateral damage looms over the authorities. There is only one safe option, sacrifice a few to save the lives of many. Tear them from the inside, cool the situation down - should be easy enough, right? Jeongguk was just trying to live out his days peacefully, but running from one’s past never really worked out for anybody - so why would he be an exception? He’s not. Demons tend to find who they’re looking for in the end.

♡ Show Me The Love

by Lethallergic

❀ Part 1: Hit The Lights

    Tags: Drabble, Smut, Top!JK

     Description:

     1-800-HOTLINEBLING

❀ Part 2: Drive Me Wild

    Tags: Social Media!AU, Snapchat, Smut, Top!JK

    Description:

    “We should stop because I want to permanently add you to the snapchat         story of my life.”

♡ Soulmates

by GiiGii

Tags: A/B/O Dynamics, Alpha!Jungkook, Omega!Taehyung, Soulmates, Past Rape, Singer!Jungkook, Student!Taehyung, Platonic Taegi, Slow Burn, Non-Con Drug Use, Pining, Imprinting, Explicit Sexual Content, Scents, Angst, Overcoming Trauma

Description:

Soulmates are supposed to be rare and enviable. At the height of his career, Jungkook can’t believe he’s found his; a beautiful omega. He also can’t believe that his soulmate has rejected him. Taehyung has struggled with being an omega since he presented. He doesn’t want to be forced into another dominating relationship but the appearance of Jungkook is upsetting his wishes.

♡ Storytime

by Trilluvium

Tags: Canon Compliant, Dry Humping, Masturbation, Voyeurism, Voice Kink, Mentions of Het-Sex, Pillow Humping, Phone Sex

Description:

Of all the ways the day could have ended, narrating some stupid smutty fantasy to Jeongguk and watching him get off to it was probably at the bottom of Taehyung’s list of guesses.

♡ Sweeter Than Fiction

by NastaeTae

Tags: Twins!AU, Established Relationship, Threesome - MMM, A/B/O Dynamics, Top!JK, Alpha!JK, Omega!Tae

Description:

Kim Taehyung is the luckiest man alive, and although he forgets that very simple fact sometimes, it doesn’t take much for him to remember it. He ended up with two sides of the same coin, and he couldn’t be any happier.

♡ Then there’s the landing

by Sharleena

Tags: Figure Skating!AU, Figure Skater!JK, Figure Skater!Tae, Figure Skater!Jimin, Enemies to Lovers, Smut, Fluff, Angst, Fuckbuddies, Rimming, Face-fucking, Competitiveness, Power Bottom!Taehyung, Explicit Language

Description:

The thing about figure skating is that it’s the most brutal sport disguised as something incredibly beautiful to look at, something elegant and frail. Just like Kim Taehyung.

♡ Wanna be loved (same love as you)

by Sugacravings

Tags: Sugar Daddy!AU, Daddy!Taehyung, Alpha/Omega/Beta Dynamics, Non-traditional A/B/O Dynamics, Fluff, Eventual Angst, Writer!Taehyung, Artist!JK, Mild Smut, Alpha!JK, Omega!Tae, Top!JK

Description:

Taehyung needs a heat buddy so he hires an alpha off Naver.

♡ You got me shot down (by love)

by NastaeTae

Tags: Porn without Plot, Smut, Top!JK, Blow Jobs, Anal Sex, Anal Fingering, Rimjobs, Delivery Boy!Jeongguk

Description:

Kim Taehyung is running out of money, but that hot delivery boy is worth it. Let’s just say that pepperoni pizza isn’t the only thing being served up tonight.

♡ You’re My Forever Boy

by Lolistar92

Tags: Fanboy meets Idol!AU, Platonic Relationships, Soul Bond, A/B/O Dynamics, Omega!Taehyung, Alpha!Jungkook, Smut, Anal Sex, Rimming, Anal Fingering, Slight Angst, Happy Ending, Mating Cycles, In Heat, Shapeshifting, Chases, Predator, Knotting, Multiple Orgasms, Dry Orgasm, Panic Attack, Voyeurism, First Time, Blood

Description:

Let’s be real - who could possibly ever say that their happily-ever-after starts with a fan meeting their idol, realizing they’re soulmates, and subsequently turning tail and running away? Well, Taehyung’s always been a bit different.

[thebloggerbloggerfun]

Hello! I have an idea for the ficlet (feel better btw!). Okay: HS AU with popular!Dean and popular!Cas, they're those two annoying guys who make funny (but also obnoxious) comments in every single class, and make stupid, flirtatious remarks to each other like "Cas looks pretty hot today guys" or "I'm totally dating Dean, everyone" etc. Only thing is, they're secretly in love, but neither will admit it. I've had this idea for a while and I'd LOVE for a talented author to execute it.

Aaaahhh it’s been too long since I’ve done a High School AU and I’ve missed it. Thanks for this one and thanks so much for asking me to fufill the prompt! I hope I do it justice :)

AO3

“Please take your seats quickly. I want to discuss your quiz scores so we can go over any questions you may have before the final test.” Ms. Mills said with a stack of papers clutched against her chest.

Dean stretched his arms above his head as he flopped into his usual seat on the third row, next to the wall so he could lean up against it in times of extreme laziness. He sprawled out accordingly, dropping his backpack to the floor and draping his letterman jacket over his seat until the air conditioning kicked in during the middle of class like it usually did.

“Hey, hot stuff.” Dean said with a nod as Castiel sat down in the seat next to him.

“Good morning, Dean.” Castiel said, barely looking up as he aligned his binder and world history book neatly on the small desk in front of him.

“How was that student council thingy yesterday?” Dean asked, popping a piece of gum into his mouth.

“Absolutely dreary without your shining personality to brighten all of our days,” Castiel murmured, completely straight-faced.

Dean winked as Ms. Mills began talking again.

“Some of you need to look at your notes from the beginning of the year again,” she said as she began passing back the quizzes. “And some of you need to remember that - if you want full credit on the final test - the answer to ‘What are the seven wonders of the ancient world’ is not ‘Castiel Novak’s Ass’ written seven times.”

She frowned when she got to Dean’s desk, dropping the paper on his desk as the rest of the class laughed.

Dean clicked his tongue and made a finger gun at Castiel with another wink.

“Really, Dean? Don’t be childish.” Castiel said, just loud enough for everyone to hear. “We all know that’s not true. I haven’t done any squats in at least a month.”

Dean hummed as he leaned back in his seat, obviously inspecting Castiel’s rear end. “Hmmm. Doesn’t show.”

“If you two are quite finished -” Ms. Mills rolled her eyes and made her way back up to the front of the room and rested a hand on her hip. “Now, did anyone have any questions on anything that you’d like to go over?”

Dean leaned forward and raised his hand.

“Besides you.”

Dean let his hand drop to rest above his heart in a faux-wounded position.

“Ms. Mills. I’m shocked and offended that you would deny me my right to receive an education. I wouldn’t dare waste your time with trivial questions.”

Ms. Mills raised an eyebrow.

“Mmhmm. What’s your question.”

“I noticed that you maked me down on question twelve? We had to name one of the causes of Enlightenment?”

“Again, the answer is not ‘Castiel Novak’s Ass’.”

The class broke out into laughter again as Dean leaned back in his chair and did - yet another - finger gun at his best friend.

“You can pay me after class,” Dean said teasingly.

Castiel nodded seriously.

“Cash or credit?”

The laughter finally died down, ending with a long sigh from the front of the classroom.

“… anyone else have any questions?”

***

Dean leaned back against the wall with the rest of their gym class while Castiel and Meg, who had been elected by Bobby (who’d be damned if any of the students called him Mr. Singer) stood up front, picking teams for dodgeball.

“Ruby,” Meg said with a lazy wave, and Ruby skipped over to stand next to her.

Dean smirked as Castiel pretended to survey the rest of the group before pointing at directly and predictably at Dean.

“I guess I’ll take that fine specimen over there.”

Dean flexed as he practically pranced over to his friend, posing next to him while the rest of the class either chuckled or rolled their eyes.

“Raphael.”

“Anna.”

“Abaddon.”

“Jo.”

The choosing continued until there was no one left and both teams had made their way over to their prospective sides for a pre-game huddle.

“Alright, here’s the plan,” Dean said in as loud of a whisper as he dared. “When the whistle blows, Cas, you stay behind and I’ll run ahead so that you can stare at my ass.”

Jo snorted.

“C’mon, Dean. Be serious -”

“No, no,” Castiel interrupted, holding up his hand. “He has a point. I think it’s a worthy sacrifice.”

“You guys are ridiculous.”Jo said, shaking her head. “Anyway, I think we should all run for it and damn the consequences.”

Castiel nodded along as Jo spoke.

“Yes. In all seriousness, Jo’s correct. As team captain, I think that we all should do whatever we can to get our hands on those balls.”

“Cas, you know you can always get your hands on my -”

“Shut the fuck up, Dean,” Jo said in exasperation.

***

Dean stripped off all of his football gear and took a quick shower before running back outside to the bleachers where Castiel usually met him after practice. He didn’t always stick around after school, but when Cas had student government stuff after, he’d watch what was left of Dean’s practices as they tended to go longer.

“How was practice?” Castiel asked, snapping his book closed and hopping off the bleachers to fall in step with Dean.

“Same old, same old,” Dean said, tugging up his shirt to rub at his damp hair. “Coach yells, we run, Lucifer trips Michael, and Benny tries to set me up on a date.”

Castiel tucked his book under his arm and nodded. “Sounds exciting. And you said?”

“That all a man will ever need is a cool drink of water like yourself.” Dean placed a hand over his own heart, bowing his head in reverence.

“A good answer,” Castiel said, nodding in his approval as they neared Dean’s car. “So, what’s your mom making for dinner tonight?”

“The best goddamn mashed potatoes you’ll ever have.”

“Wonderful.” Castiel grinned as he opened the Impala’s passenger side door and slipped inside. “I’m starving.”

They drove the ten minute drive to Dean’s house with the radio turned all the way up, singing the lyrics of various love songs to each other as dramatically as they could, with Castiel reminding Dean to watch the road as needed.

“Mom!” Dean shouted as he opened the front door. “Do we have enough food for a plus one?”

He dropped his backpack and stripped his shoes at the front door, watching Castiel do the same.

“Of course!” he heard from the kitchen. “Who’d you bring?”

“Adonis reincarnate.”

“Dean, you know Castiel is always welcome.” Mary said, and poked her head out from behind the doorframe. “Hello, Cas.”

“Hi, Mrs. Winchester.” Castiel waved before turning to Dean with a raised eyebrow. “Adonis reincarnate, huh? That’s a new one.”

Dean grinned.

“Only the best for you, babe.”

***

“Listen, Dean.”

Dean looked up from where he was shoving all of his clean laundry into its respective drawers while Cas lay on his bed.

“Yeah?”

Castiel’s hands drummed on his stomach.

“I was thinking… what if we went on a date?”

Dean paused and turned completely around, a pair of boxer shorts still in his hand.

“What?”

Castiel propped himself up on his elbows and licked his lips.

“You know. A…. date. You and me. Doing something together.” Dean watched Castiel pause and clear his throat. “Would you want to?”

Dean tilted his head and let a slow smile creep across his lips.

“Cas, I think that’s an amazing idea.”

Castiel’s mouth fell open, and an even wider grin split his face.

“Wait - really? You think?”

“Absolutely! You’re a genius! People will think that’s hilarious!”

Dean burst out laughing at the thought of everyone’s faces at school when they found out. It would really be the icing on the top of the cake for a lot of people. Not only would they flirt with each other at every opportunity, but now an actual date? Incredible.

“Right. Yeah.”

Dean glanced over at Castiel, who was looking away, his smile nearly gone.

“No, it really will be funny! Jo will probably die laughing. It’s a great idea, Cas.”

Castiel chuckled, but even that sounded forced, like he no longer found his idea funny.

“Thanks,” he murmured, flopping back down on the bed and staring out the window.

Weird.

Still, even though it would be a joke, the idea of going on a date with Cas… it was nice. Nicer than he’d thought it would be.

Not that he’d ever…you know.

Thought about that.

“So, what did you want to do for it?” Dean asked, though he already had a list of possibilities that he was running through. Dinner and a movie was up there at the top of the list, just because of how incredibly cliche it was.  

“I don’t care,” Cas mumbled, picking up his book again and turning to his bookmark. “You decide.”

Dean tossed the boxers into his top drawer and rubbed his hands together.

This was going to be the best date of his life.

***

It was not the best date of his life.

It was…okay. Very average, if he had to make a guess.

Definitely by no fault of Dean’s, he finally decided. He was making sure to go out of his way to be especially flirtatious with Castiel on their date by holding doors open, being more touchy-feely than usual, and absolutely drowning him in pet names.

Cas, however, wasn’t playing off of him as well as he usually did.

“Here you are, sunshine,” Dean said, opening the passenger door for Castiel with a flourish. “I hope you enjoyed the meal.”

“Thanks,” Castiel said, sliding into the seat and shutting the door himself, nearly wrenching it from Dean’s grasp.

Dean pressed his lips together as he walked over to the other side of the car to let himself in.

“You doing okay?” he asked and started the car, sparing a glance over to Castiel.

Castiel let out a breath and shot him a quick smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes.

“Yes. I’m fine. Just a little tired, I think.”

“Oh, okay.” Dean drummed his fingers against the steering wheel as he drove, the silence making the drive a little more awkward than it usually was.

“And here we are,” Dean said cheerfully when they stopped in front of Castiel’s house. “Home sweet home.”

Castiel smiled and leaned his head back on the head rest. “Well, thanks Dean. It was a fun date. We should - what are you doing?”

Dean paused in the middle of opening the driver’s side door.

“Um, walking you to your front door, of course.”

“Oh,” Castiel ducked his head and the dim lighting made it almost look like Castiel was blushing. “Dean, you don’t need to do that. I think I can find my way on my own.”

Dean scoffed and shook his head, as if the very thought of such an act wounded his honor.

“What kind of gentleman would that make me? Please.” he winked and quickly shut the door behind him to get to the other side of the car before Castiel opened the door. “It’s my pleasure.”

Castiel looked up at him as Dean opened the car door, and Dean’s heart couldn’t help but skip a beat.

Oh. Well.

He’d probably just had a little too much fun pretending to be on a date with him, is all. It was just muscle memory for him by now.

Castiel climbed out. Dean shut the door. The two of them walked up to Castiel’s porch.

Just like they would do on a real date.

“Again, thank you, Dean. It was fun.” Castiel said, smiling at him from just a foot away.

“Are you gonna leave me without a goodnight kiss?”

Dean wasn’t sure why he said it, probably because that’s what he did at the end of every date, but the moment it was out of his mouth he knew there was no taking it back. Part of him wasn’t even sure that he wanted to.

Castiel’s lips pulled into slight frown, and Dean realized that’s where he’d been staring for quite some time now.

“What?”

“You know. Goodnight kiss.” Dean pointed to his own lips with a smile.

“Why?” Castiel was squinting now, like he usually did when he didn’t understand something the teacher was saying or when he was working out a math problem.

“To like, make the date official. It’ll be funny.” Dean shrugged.

Castiel’s frown deepened.

“No.Goodnight, Dean.”

“Oh, come on, Cas!” Dean reached out and rested a hand on his forearm as Castiel turned away to open the door to his house. “It won’t mean anything. Just a kiss so we can tell people we did!”

Dean could see Castiel’s grip on the doorknob tighten minimally, and when Castiel looked back with a face full of hurt -

Dean took a step back.

“That’s why I’m saying ‘no’.”

And Dean was left alone on the porch.

***

Dean closed the door to his house as quietly as he could, and rubbed at his eyes in confusion. Something had gone very, very badly and Dean’s mind was experiencing a little too much turbulence for him to figure out what exactly that meant or where it had happened.

“Dean? Is that you?”

Dean rubbed at the back of his head as he made his way into the living room, following the sound of his mother’s voice.

Mary was sitting on the couch with a book in her lap; her hair was pulled back into a messy and reading glasses rested on the tip of her nose.

“Hey, mom.”

Mary looked up and smiled.

“Hey, hun. What were you up to?”

Dean sighed and flopped down on the couch next to her, resting his hands on his stomach.

“Went on a date with Cas.”

“Oh? And how’d it go?”

Dean shrugged and made a noncommittal grunt.

“Well, what did you do for the date?”

“Dinner and a movie.”

Mary raised her eyebrow.

“Really? I thought that was something you only did on first dates.”

Dean frowned and glanced over at his mother as she calmly turned a page in her book.

“It- it was a first date.”

Mary made a face at Dean and tutted as she shook her head in disappointment.

“You’ve never taken your boyfriend on a proper date? Dean.”

Dean sat up.

“Wha - but I - we’re not - it’s not like -” Dean steepled his fingers together and pressed them against his lips. “Wait, what…what makes you think that Cas and I are dating?”

“Well,” Mary pursed her lips thoughtfully and folded a dog-ear in her book. “Besides the intense amount of flirting that’s sort of a giveaway? Two things. One is the way that you look at him.”

“The way I….” Dean trailed off, a question in is voice.

“The way you look at him. Dean, the way you stare at Castiel reminds me of the way people stare at stars. It’s like there’s nothing else in the world you’d rather be looking at.”

Dean felt the a light blush begin crawling up his neck.

“Oh. Um. What’s the second thing, then?”

Mary smiled.

“The way he looks at you.”

***

“Cas! Hey, Cas!”

Dean shoved his way through the crowds of lunch period, trying to catch up to his best friend. Castiel had been extremely successful in avoiding him throughout their classes and even the teachers had noticed that he’d sat on the opposite side of the room from Dean instead right next to him as he usually did.

“‘Scuse me. Pardon me.” Dean used few well-timed elbow jabs until he could finally tap Castiel on the shoulder. “Cas. Hey.”

Castiel glanced over his shoulder and squinted.

“Oh. Hello Dean. How did everyone take the news about our date last night?” he asked, folding his arms in front of his chest and not bothering to hide the slight venom in his voice.

“I uh, I haven’t told anyone.” Dean said, rubbing at the back of his neck. “Look, can we talk?”

Castiel shrugged.

“Sure.”

Dean grabbed Castiel by his hand and led him outside where there weren’t so many people surrounding them before.

He took a deep breath, quickly running through the major points of long speech that he’d prepared in his head. It was full of eloquent apologies and deep confessions that he hoped would help Castiel realize how he felt and maybe help him forgive what an ass he was.

“Will you be my boyfriend?” Dean blurted, then slapped a hand over his mouth.

Castiel’s eyes widened almost comically.

“What?”

“Shit, wait. That was supposed to come last.” Dean licked his lips, feeling the panic set in. “Look, Cas. I’m so sorry about last night. I played it off like it was just a joke but…I don’t think it was. I don’t think any of this has been a joke for me and I’ve just been too much of an idiot to realize it. What I’m trying to say here is, I uh, I really like you, Cas. I don’t want any of this to be pretend anymore. I want you to be my boyfriend.”

Castiel continued to stare, and Dean didn’t blame him for taking his time while he digested the word-vomit that he’d just dumped.

“So…” he said finally. “The date was real?”

Dean shrugged, letting himself smile a little.

“It should have been.”

Castiel nodded to himself and slowly reached out to grab Dean’s hand, giving him plenty of time to move back if this wasn’t something he wanted.

He wanted it.

“Then I think I’d like that very much, Dean.” Castiel murmured, intertwining their fingers together with a grin.

“Awesome.” Dean breathed a sigh of relief and squeezed his hand tightly, not bothering to hide how giddy Castiel’s simple answer had made him. They were holding hands. Of course, they had before, but all of those times were just screwing around being funny.

This wasn’t funny anymore.

It was so much better than that.

It was real.

“So, uh, Cas?” Dean said, ducking his head a little to hide his playful grin.

“Mmmhm?”

“If that date was real, does that mean I can get a goodnight kiss now?”

Castiel raised an eyebrow, a teasing look on his face as he slowly leaned in, causing Dean’s heart to nearly burst from his chest in anticipation-

And pressed a finger against Dean’s lips.

“I never kiss on the first date. I’ll see you later, darling. ”

Dean laughed as Castiel slipped from his grasp and walked away, a slight skip in his step.

“Then I’ll pick you up at eight, hot stuff!” He called after Castiel’s retreating silhouette.

A few meandering students paused and stared at Dean curiously.

“That’s my boyfriend.” Dean said with a nonchalant shrug and the biggest goddamn smile that he’d ever had on his face.

[helly-watermelonsmellinfellon]

Here's the snippet! I don't even have a name for the story btw. I was just having too much fun channeling the early 2000s.

This is legit, just the first section of the first chapter from the OC's POV.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

So reincarnation/transmigration is a thing. A thing that can actually happen to people and did in fact happen to me. Just now, to be precise.

The worst part about all of this isn’t waking up as Bella Swan in the Twilight Universe. That is so far down the list of issues I’m having at the moment that it can be put off for now. Hell, of all the characters I could wake up as, Bella isn’t quite so bad to be honest.

What hurts the most about this situation is that I died. The original me. I know this for a fact because one doesn’t just get flattened by an eighteen-wheeler and walk away. Twenty-five-year-old me ended up in a five-car pileup that got rammed by a massive ass truck on the highway. My side was the one that got hit with full force. I didn’t even have time to note where my leg was broken before the blaring horn drew my attention to the right.

I got a view of a filthy, however-many-ton vehicle coming at me before everything went dark.

Like, it was fast so I guess that’s good for me… but the whole dying thing sucks. I lived through 2020 dammit. I was supposed to get better and go on with life as one of the miracle cases!

It’s not just that I made it through without getting the virus. I got the virus. I was one of the lucky ones to survive it. I lost half of my left arm to amputation of course and then had to learn how to walk again, but I survived it! I was going strong and coming back from physical therapy when I died!

Technically, I survived the Swine Flu outbreak in 2009 and then the Coronavirus outbreak in 2020. Contracted and survived both of them; died because of an idiot on the highway. That is the biggest slap in the face for someone like me.

I was so fucking lucky to survive before a vaccine was even created. It was all going so well, yet I had to die young anyway. Deadly viruses couldn’t do the job so it was left up to some fucking moron behind the wheel of a vehicle.

I’m going to be bitter about this for a while. I’m already tearing up over it. The unfairness is going to prematurely end me in this new body I’m stuck in. Why me?

So… onto the whole transmigrating thing. I’ll have time to wallow later on, no worries. I had to take full note of everything going on first. You can’t plan if you’re too befuddled.

Bella Swan was never someone I would choose to be if I had the choice to become a fictional character and take their place. Charlie was a real G, but Renee kind of annoyed me if I’m being honest. With them as parents, I’m not sure how I would handle it. Especially since my parents were vastly different. Specifically, mom was both parents because my… heh-hem, was a piece of shit.

As for Bella, she was dainty. I guess. Like 5’4”, super thin, and not physically imposing in any way. My first problem is that I don’t want to be short! I’ve never been short a day in my life! I don’t know how to be a short person. There was no real-life experience for this. I’ve always been half a foot taller than everyone my age. And now I’m short as fuck. I’m going to have to climb counters just to get to cupboards now.

The second issue I have is that Bella is far too nice. People were acting the fool around her and she was just too decent to tell them off. She was often equated to a wet doormat by myself and even my mom on a few occasions. It felt like people walked all over her because she didn’t stand up for herself enough.

Like Edward being a domineering dick and having to control everything in her life. Alice fucking bulldozing everyone all because she can have subjective visions of the future. Mike, Eric(in the films at least), and Tyler needing to learn how to take a damn hint or just a blatant refusal. Rosalie deserving to be knocked down a peg or two so she’d pull her vain head out of her ass.

The list went on really.

Finally… Bella attracted a lot of danger, and I don’t like pain. While Bella was a champ who could take all kinds of agony with a relatively clear mind and determination, I am a coward. And the thing is, I have a high threshold for pain after training myself to ignore my problems so my heh-hem didn’t find out, but I still don’t want to go through pain if I don’t have to.

Oh! I should probably add on the fact that Bella never acquainted herself with Equilibrium. I don’t know if that would transfer to me since I orient myself differently, but I’ve never been clumsy and I don’t want to start now. I can walk normally again but for what? The price of tripping over thin air every two seconds?

So yeah, those were some issues I was currently facing.

The kind I can’t really ignore right now because the now is my present and it is not a gift nor is it giving.

Next in the line of problems… it’s fucking hot in Bella’s bedroom. Meaning I’m probably still in Arizona. Kill me now. I was born in the North. I wasn’t born for this shit. Dry heat is of the devil. Fuck that. I can’t wait to go to Washington.

I groaned, hating everything in my current existence. The cactus on the far dresser. The painting of space on the wall to my right. Even the fucking chibi cat stuffy on the desk across the room.

...Okay, maybe not the cat stuffy. It was adorable after all.

So I’m not so sure I’m living again, or just dreaming in a coma. Who knows? What is real and what isn’t? Is there truly any actual way to determine if we are asleep or awake? If we’re alive or dead? The human mind is capable of many things we aren’t even aware of yet. This could all be some elaborate ruse played on us by our own brains.

Nope!

No time for introspection. I don’t want to fall into that kind of hole right now. No thought-provoking theatrics allowed, thank you very much.

“Bella!”

A knock sounded at the door on the far left of the room. Renee Dwyer’s face appeared as it opened. She looked like her movie self. Did that mean I look like Kristen Stewart? If so… that’s a problem.

She’s hot. Like, she’s not tall but somehow her legs always look like they’re a mile long, and I’m weak for legs. Getting hot and bothered for Kristen Stewart when I look just like her would be a whole new level of fucked up. I don’t think I could handle that if that ends up being the case.

“You haven’t slept in since you were in elementary school!” Renee said in very obvious, amused shock. “I suppose it’s good that you packed everything already so you don’t have to rush for the plane.” Her gaze moved to the large suitcases stacked by the door.

Oh shit. It was the day. The big move. The biggest change in Bella’s life. The catalyst to the whole shebang.

Thank God I’ve been on a plane before. Imagine having all of this stress of being in a world that isn’t your own, in a body that isn’t your own, surrounded by people you don’t technically know even if you know a lot of stuff about them. Now imagine all of that, but also having the knowledge that you don’t know how to navigate an airport and don’t know how to do things on your own.

I would have been fucked surely.

I sat up and stretched until my new back popped. My. New. Back. The back of the body that wasn’t mine.

What happened to Bella?

Can’t believe it took me this long but seriously, what happened to the real Bella Swan? Did I like… kick her out of her body? Did she die? Have I trapped her soul in the mortal plane with no flesh prison of its own? Is she stuck somewhere?

Having a conscience sucks.

Also, I just don’t have time for a moral quandary right now.

“Bella?” Renee asked, looking a touch concerned since I never answered her question.

“I was tired,” I chose to say since I didn’t really know what else could work. Like, hey, I’m in your daughter’s body but I’m not her. That wouldn’t go over well.

Renee smiled, relieved. “I made you one of my special smoothies!”

From what I recall, Bella was the mom. Cooking, cleaning, being mature all the time. Renee and Charlie had no cooking skills. Is it wrong that I was concerned when she said she made me something to eat?

“Oh, there’s no reason to look like you’re about to get poisoned!” Renee huffed good-naturedly. “It’s frozen strawberries, milk, vanilla yogurt, and Splenda. You can’t mess that up.”

God, I hope so. It’s only four ingredients but oh Lordy do I hope that they can’t be messed up somehow. Please, whoever put me here. Please go easy on me, these are some turbulent times for me right now.

“Get dressed. Phil will bring your bags down for you, don’t worry about carrying them.”

And then Renee flounced off down the stairs, leaving the door slightly open as she went. Was that a mom thing? Not being able to close the door they just opened? My mom did that all the time and it never ceased to aggravate me.

My mom… She was in the accident with me, but on the driver’s side. Her side didn’t get the full force of the collision so is it possible that she made it out? But if she made it out wouldn’t the injury still be bad enough to warrant a long hospital stay?

The hospital bills from me were enormous and I still hadn’t been able to pay them all off yet. She had even less money than I did, and even worse insurance. Would it honestly be better if I wished she had died in the crash too, just so she doesn’t have to get hounded to pay my bills, my funeral expenses, and then her own hospital bills?

Is that callous of me? Am I a bad daughter for thinking this way?

I… am not going to think about her right now. I will have a long-ass flight to spend crying without letting anyone in on the knowledge that I’m grieving. So no… right now is not a good time. I don’t want to think about this at all if I don’t have to.

Okay, getting ready. I can do that. I can get ready for the day and pretend everything is fine for now. I’m good at pretending to be okay.

The first thing to note… I do not look like Kristen Stewart. Or any actress who is a brunette either. Going by what Bella should look like, versus what I look like right now, it’s not that different I suppose.

Though I’m just going to say… was it ever announced that Bella is white? Like 60% of the world has dark hair and dark eyes. And even if her skin is canonically of a lighter complexion, that doesn’t necessarily mean she’s a white woman, does it?

I’m saying this because right now I don’t necessarily look like the standard idea of a white woman. Like, I have a very common idea when I think a brunette looks like if that makes sense. You can put her in a shuffle of ten other white women with the same coloring and couldn’t tell any of them apart basically.

What I’m getting at is that Bella’s cheekbones are very high, her eyes are very thin and far apart, and she just doesn’t scream ‘average white woman’ to me. Or maybe not like a Caucasian American woman specifically? Not really sure how to word this where it will make sense. It makes sense to me.

Bella’s most obvious facial feature is her widow’s peak. Very much there and very much pronounced and plays a part in the shaping of her face. Dark hair. Not necessarily what could be called black if it was in the sunlight, but not mahogany as many claimed. Brown eyes. The more average, dirt brown instead of uniquely flecked with gold or green or something nice. Not ‘warm chocolate’ or whatever dumb food analogy is used often. The chin is more pointed which makes her face more heart-shaped thanks to the widow’s peak.

Eyes aren’t as wide as they were suggested to be, but they are further apart. The nose is not so thin either with the bridge being a bit flatter than expected. Not large though. Mostly indistinct. The lips did feel too big for the shape of the jaw. There was no arch to the brows, they were flat as fuck and lacked personality. Trying to twitch either had no effect on the shape even with the muscle raised.

Compared to what I look like, Bella is like a Victoria’s Secret model who walks for the Fashion Shows. But compared to actual Victoria’s Secret models, Bella is pretty plain.

Average might be a nicer way to say it. No offense to Bella intended of course.

If I was a superficial asshole who was asked to pick between a lineup of girls with similar features, Bella would be the last option and only if I had to pick her. No offense again. The amount of male attention she drew had to be because they simply had something new to look at because none of them were going for her because of her personality. They didn’t try getting to know her enough for that to be the reason.

And no, she wasn’t some kind of goddess in terms of looks. At all. No one could start a war over her beauty if that makes sense. Such an excuse would never fly with most people where I'm from.

You know, if I knew how to use make-up and had a sense of fashion, I could probably be considered decently pretty with enough effort.

Too bad I had no such knowledge and won’t be wasting money trying to learn. I’m also lazy. Is it really worth it in the long run? The time it would take to do that stuff every day could be spent sleeping.

“Hurry up, Bella!” Renee called from downstairs, reminding me that I haven’t done anything yet.

Fuck!

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

So that's the snippet. I had way too much fun. She also feels kind of like Yuuki from Yuuki: Living Rich.

i keep up with ur bookmarks on ao3 bcuz i trust u to have good taste in fanfic & i saw some twilight fics with oc-as-bella on ur list & wanted to ask if u could write ur own oc-as-bella fanfic bcuz i kno u would do it good & not be like the 'feminists' who take their jealousy over not being with rob pattinson out on bella like it's somehow her fault. no one bashes bella for her actual bullshit its always how shes bland or ugly or she should have dated both edward and jacob to be fair to both.

You know this sent me on a whole obsessed writing spree last month. And then I stopped around like Ch. 5(I think it was Ch. 5) and thought, but what would Eddie's POV of all this be? And then decided to write each chapter from his(and basically everyone else's) POV.

I keep going back to the chapters I have and adding more detail because you can't go wrong with more detail if it's only to flesh things out more.

Though I have to admit I don't think this fic idea will ever get posted, and I'm really sorry about that. While it's fun channeling my inner 2005, I'm not like super confident this would be appreciated even with the sudden revival of the Twilight fandom.

I could, perhaps, give a snippet if you're interested. If you're still around of course. It's been like over a month since this Ask came in. Also it's in 1st Person and I don't write in 1st very often so...