#she is really hard to draw though. like i love her enough to do it but man there is a lot going on in this design

[eveningrainstorm]

new unhinged girl just dropped

[hcneymooners]

⋆ do you love me enough that i may be weak with you?

caitlyn x morally ambiguous!fem!reader x ambessa. men & minors dni.

synopsis: you are in competition with caitlyn for ambessa’s attention. you will follow her, to whatever end. no one draws you in like ambessa does. or so you tell yourself, even as caitlyn's lingering gaze makes your heart stutter. she’s almost desperate to be friends, but you don’t trust that girl by any means. to entertain her is to enable weakness. but, then again, have you ever truly been strong?

cw: a lot wow. age gap, older woman/younger woman, you're the youngest but in your twenties, canon divergence au, toxic relationships, unhealthy relationships, power imbalance, power dynamics, impact play, body worship, dirty talk, bdsm dynamics, sub!reader, brat!reader, dom!caitlyn, dom!ambessa, voyeurism, exhibitionism, masturbation, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, tribbing, vaginal fingering, cunnilingus, vaginal sex, face-riding, slightly dub-con in some parts, kissing, so much kissing, non-sexual intimacy, shower sex, hate sex (but is it really), sexual punishment, implied mental health issues, implied manipulation, you are all up to no good, polyam but is it really we'll see, caitbessa is not in love but they use each other, slight violence (fighting, training, & reader is hurt though not by caitbessa.), enemies to lover, rivals to lovers, slightly dark but not too much, guys i even wrote this properly no lowercase.

wc: 10.03k

soundtrack: give up - fka twigs, careless - fka twigs ft. daniel ceaser, holy terrain - fka twins, your girl - lana del rey (unreleased), & oh my angel - bertha tilman. order is intentional.

notes: this was supposed to be 7k. i need to be locked up. dedicated especially to @megalomaniacz for being the beautiful mind behind the caitbessa note that started it all. definitely one of my favorite things i've ever written.

A COIN’S FIRST SIDE. — CAITLYN.

​​You do not understand her incessant need to look at you.

The day has broken dark and cold. Your body aches with the rigor of being destroyed and depleted timelessly by Ambessa's experienced hands. It is only the three of you in the early morning - you, Caitlyn with her delicate bones wrapped perfectly in binding and sequestered underneath her uniform of buttery, dusky leather, and Ambessa with her arms bare, her face exposed by the careful braiding of her hair that reveals every subtle shift of expression.

It is this, over and over, until your body shudders into collapse. Yet—minute victory or sudden death—Caitlyn must look at you. Even when it's her turn, with her arched back pressed hard into the textured bamboo of the mat, her face crushed against the hollow of Ambessa's palm, she is looking at you. Those eyes, relentless and searching, track your every movement. It drives you utterly insane.

The weight of her gaze feels like another opponent entirely, separate from Ambessa's ruthless instruction. You tell yourself it's determination that keeps you standing, keeps you coming back day after day to this dance of dominance and submission. But there's something else, something in the way Caitlyn's breath catches when Ambessa's fingers ghost over that perfectly formed bruise on her collarbone—the one you gave her yesterday. Something in the way Ambessa's eyes darken when she notices you noticing.

You leave it. You cannot think of it.

Yet it follows you from the training grounds, through the winding corridors where shadows pool like old bruises. Back to the quarters you share with her, where even the air feels thick with unspoken things. It follows you. 

Caitlyn's presence fills every corner of the space you're forced to call home, from the precise way she arranges her rifle components to the lingering scent of gunpowder and leather that clings to her sheets. You are aware of that incessant staring, of the way her eyes rove over your naked chest; your small breasts are cupped dutifully in your hands as you unwrap yourself with a harsh breath.

Teacup tits, she'd called them when she’d once had you pinned against the wooden floor. It had been a day without mats; a day of endless testing. She had leaned in close, teeth gleaming like jewels as she held your stomach down with her hips. She had been sitting on you, and you had floundered then froze at the comments. You didn’t know she could be so brazen, so dirty-mouthed. This follows you too.

You've learned to move around her—around each other—in careful orbit. You are like twin moons, two violent girls with cheeks pressed against each other in the night, caught in some larger gravity - Ambessa's gravity - never touching but always aware. Always watching. 

The way she strips her gloves off finger by finger after training makes your teeth clench. You tell yourself it's irritation, not fascination when she unwinds the bindings from her own chest with methodical precision. Tell yourself you don't notice how the morning's wounds are already blooming across her shoulders, masterpieces in indigo and blue that match the ones Ambessa left on you last week—it doesn’t make it less true.

And Ambessa—sometimes you catch Ambessa watching too. The way her eyes linger on Caitlyn's throat, on the marks her own hands left there. It sparks something warm and dangerous in your gut - not envy, you insist. Never envy. Just hunger, the same hunger that drives you to push harder, to prove yourself worthy of Ambessa's attention, maybe both of your intentions. To prove you're stronger than whatever weakness Caitlyn stirs in you with her endless watching.

But later the envy cannot help but be itself, and you retch into your hands and sink from the vibrations of your anger. You do not trust her. You’ve seen her with that girl, the reckless pink-haired one, and she knows that you’ve seen her. But you are keeping this secret for reasons you don’t understand.

And in the dead of night, when sleep eludes you, you hear Caitlyn's breathing change rhythm across the room. You wonder if she lies awake thinking of the way Ambessa's fingers traced that lesion on her hip today, the one that matched the shape of your knuckles perfectly. Wonder if she knows you're awake too, caught in this web of wanting that none of you dare name. 

🕸

She is desperate for you, in a way that you do not understand. It is easier when she is quiet about it. 

There is an evening where she is loud—where everything is loud—and it rattles you. There is an incessant buzzing, maybe cicadas, and in the beginning, you are enjoying it because it reminds you of home and the way your feet fall into wet earth in the heart of the warm season. But then slowly, you begin to lose your mind and the buzzing is in your teeth and you now feel slightly detached from the world and your body is nothing but heat and you are almost lapping at the screen between the open dormitory window and the world and—

You crawl out of bed. You wear nothing but a sleep shirt two sizes too big, the chest open so that your sweat-laden skin gleams like a body of water. It belongs to Ambessa but it was your father's first until she swallowed your homeland and stole you away. You took it back and she said nothing. Maybe she was impressed with the voracity with which you bit and scratched her in the dark, massive cave of her bedroom.

So, yes, you crawl out of bed. You are swamped in ivory fabric and you drag your feet as you roam the halls. There is movement and it scares you, but you muzzle your mouth with your hand so that your scream dies between your teeth. It's only another guard. You keep moving.

Now, you are in the kitchen. You rummage through spaces until your fingers alight on the thick sphere of a pomegranate. You yank and now it is yours; hard and red in your hands. You turn, and she's there.

Caitlyn moves like water in the dark, all fluid grace even in her own sleep clothes. Her eyes catch the moonlight streaming through the high windows, turning them to pale fire. You clutch the pomegranate tighter, your nails breaking the skin. Juice runs down your wrist.

"Let me," she says, and she's closer now, close enough that you can see the light sheen of sweat on her collarbones. It satisfies you that she is warm too, that she is touchable. Her fingers brush yours as she takes the fruit, and you let her only because you're transfixed by the way she reaches for the small cheese knife on the counter, the way she tests its edge with her thumb. You hope for blood but there is none.

You don't remember moving, but suddenly you're against each other, a dance of hands and breath and barely-contained violence. She pushes, you pull. You spin her toward the table, but she turns it, uses your momentum to send you both sprawling across its surface. Your back cracks against the stone like a bone. Her face crumples momentarily at the sound of your pain, but then she is herself again. The pomegranate rolls away, forgotten until it isn't.

You think of another table, a wooden one from when you were younger. You think of hiding beneath the heavy oak with her, your breaths shallow and hushed as you press close to her side. You were younger then, small enough to fit between her knees, your hands gripping hers like a lifeline. Above, Ambessa’s boots thundered across the floor, her sharp commands reverberating through the room.

“Where are you?” she’d barked, voice like a stone through a window.

But Caitlyn had only grinned, leaning in to whisper, “Don’t breathe."

It's different now. You no longer fit.

She lands on top of you when you hit the floor, pinning you with her hips. The knife glints in her hand, but she just smiles, that same smile from the training mat, the one that makes your stomach clench with disgust and desi—no. She reaches for the pomegranate, and you watch, breathless, as she begins to peel it with delicate precision.

"I'll show you how," she murmurs, and then she's leaning down, pressing her mouth to yours with bruising force. Her teeth catch your lip, and you taste copper, sharp, and sweet like pomegranate juice. When she pulls back, your blood is dark on her mouth, and she licks it away like it's nothing, like this is nothing, continuing to peel the fruit with steady hands.

You buck your hips and she sets the knife down, next to your wrists where your veins gather and bulge like snakes. She holds you down with her core, and you can feel the heat between her legs. There is a moment where you freeze, and she smiles with delight. You buck again and she slams you back down, using a hand around your throat to keep you beneath her like a lamb. Her other hand comes up—the knife, you think in fear—and loiters against herself. Then it moves down, quick and smooth, to raise her slip of a nightgown and bare her creamy thighs. She shifts so that she is atop your stomach, and pushes the shirt up until it’s beneath your breasts. 

She isn’t wearing undergarments, or maybe she is. Maybe they are just thin. Either way, you can feel her against the skin of your belly, warm and weeping. You still aren’t moving, but you are slicking in return. You want to bite her, dig until she releases some sort of sound. 

Then there is a sound - a sharp intake of breath - and you both turn. 

Ambessa stands in the doorway, her expression unreadable in the darkness. For a moment, she watches, her head tilted like she's solving a puzzle. You look back at Caitlyn—who seems unrepentant about her half-nakedness. You put it together, the idea that they have seen one another like this before. The envy is riotous. You ache to kiss Caitlyn again if only to vomit in her mouth. 

It’s as if she knows and so she leans in, holds the side of your head as she feeds you pomegranate seeds from the cavern of her own mouth. Eventually, she is no longer feeding, only taking. She presses harder and harder until you let out a yelp of discomfort. It feels, if you aren’t mistaken, like a claim. 

Ambessa gazes at the two of you for a moment longer, then she turns away. Her footsteps echo down the hall, leaving you with the taste of blood and fruit and Caitlyn's smile against your mouth. 

You regain your strength; you throw her off. 

🕸

You don't sleep. 

Your body vibrates with fury, with want, with the phantom press of her against your stomach. The dawn breaks grey and sullen through the window, and when you dress for training, you notice Caitlyn watching you again. But it's different now - you see the tremor in her hands, the way she swallows when you bend to lace your boots.

The training grounds are empty. No Ambessa. The message is as clear as a blade against the skin, and you want to scream. Instead, you strip and step into the shower block, letting scalding water pound against your shoulders. You hear the door open, close. Her footsteps on the tile.

"Don't," you say, but your voice lacks conviction. You're too tired to maintain the walls between you.

"You think she's punishing us." Caitlyn's voice is closer now. You hear fabric hitting the floor. "She's not. She's giving us space."

You turn, ready to snarl, but the sight of her stops you. She's different in daylight - less predator, more girl. There are shadows under her eyes that match your own. Water beads on her collarbone where last night's sweat had gleamed.

“Get away from me.” She doesn’t. You try again. “Space for what?” 

The question comes out raw.

She steps under the spray with you, and you don't stop her. You watch the way the water falls over her, the spread of the moisture against her staunch skin. She is so angular, so prismatic. You feel as if the world refracts off of her. The water is running cold, so her breasts are erect and straining toward you. You think of drinking from them, more the effort of it, of the space between them where your mouth would fit.

"For this," she says but doesn't touch you. "For whatever this is. I'm tired of watching you pretend you don't feel it too."

"You don't know what I feel."

“I think you are a lonely creature.”

The heat between you evaporates like ash against the wind. Your mouth twists, and she steps toward you. She understands she has misrepresented herself and her intentions. You feel a familiar prickling. Tears. 

“Is this how you see me? A cowardly animal?” Your voice is flat, and she balks with her hands flexing nervously against her thighs.

“No. No. I only meant—if anything we are both animals. We have been trained as such at least.”

“You aren’t making this better for yourself,” you say, turning away. “And you don’t know me in any way.”

"I know you taste like pomegranates." 

You turn back to look at her, incredulous. “I had just eaten one, you little fool.”

“I know you let me kiss you before you threw me off.” Her smile is small, almost sad. “I know you've been keeping my secret about Vi.”

The name hits like a slap. You rise to the bait. 

"Why her?"

"Why Ambessa?"

You have no answer for that. The water runs between you, and for once, you let yourself really look at her. At the desperation in her eyes, the way she’s holding herself like she's afraid you'll bolt. Maybe you've both been hungry for the same thing all along.

Still, it eats at you. This odd way she is pretending to be meek and mild. She is soft in the same ways you are, with the same dips in her hips and calluses along her palm. You think of the panther-like movements of her muscles as she readies a shot. 

Something gathers underneath your tongue, and suddenly you are wailing. Loud and long. You rush at her, but she is waiting for you. She dips, and rams into your stomach as she flips you onto the tile. Though she is fighting back, she’s careful with you. Your head is cupped by her limber fingers as she sends you down. 

You kick and catch your foot on her side. With a gasp, she’s down too, but a hand still manages to grip at the fine bones of your ankle and yank. It hurts, and you make a terrible noise. She releases you as if you’ve burned her, and you twist to get out from underneath her. 

You’re on your belly now, flopping like a fish, but she makes you stay. She wrestles you up so that your back is bent as you press against her chest. You feel her fingers crawl like spider legs down your chest. She fondles, gropes, your tits. She is starved and erratic, pinching your nipples until they are standing on their own. 

Your skin is slippery with soap, so Caitlyn digs her nails in for grip. Then the action stops and her hand descends into the apex of your thighs. You try to jerk, try to send her off but she knows this now. She is understanding. That’s even worse.

She holds you, exactly as you need, and gets two fingers inside of your cunt. She curves them, tries to pull you inside out. You let out another noise, but it is less terrible. She works at you until you cannot remember language, only a deep animalistic noise of ‘uh uh uh’, a rhythm. Her thumb swipes against your clit and you’re there, the pleasure like a blinding fire.

You still try to leave her; you try to crawl. She rolls you over and bullies herself in between your legs until she can place her cheek along your heaving stomach. You begin to cry. You’re unsure why, but maybe Caitlyn knows because she only strokes your inner thigh to soothe you. She looks up at you, hair black with water.

“It can be like this, always. You only need to—”

You shove her and scramble back until you’re sitting on your own. She still watches you, cheek to the tile now.

“No conditions,” she says, reworking her words. “Only us.”

You close your eyes and see pink. You open them and think of your general.

“There will always be her.”

Neither of you knows which woman you’re speaking of.

A COIN’S SECOND SIDE. — AMBESSA.

Sleep does not come that night either. You only try because when there is no session to distract it, your body aches for a bed.

You lie awake, counting the beats between Caitlyn's breaths across the room, replaying the way her cheek pressed against your belly, her lips ghosting over skin as she spoke. The way she looked at you like you were something both precious and perilous, desired and dangerous all at once. Your body still aches from her attention.

A sound draws you from your thoughts - the soft click of your dormitory door. Through barely-opened eyes, you watch Caitlyn rise like a phantom, pulling on a robe. She doesn't look back as she slips out. 

Your feet are moving before your mind catches up.

You follow her through corridors you know by heart, the same path you took for that damned pomegranate. But she goes deeper, down halls you've never dared explore. When she stops at a familiar door—Ambessa's door—your heart clenches.

They speak in whispers you can't quite catch, but you see the way Ambessa's hand cups Caitlyn's face, the way Caitlyn leans into it like a cat being stroked. Your stomach twists violently. But then:

"She's ready," Caitlyn says, just loud enough, still soft. "She just doesn't know it yet."

Ambessa's laugh is low, rich like honey. "Oh, little one. She's been ready since I took her. We're just waiting for her to admit it."

You don't stay to hear more. But in the morning, when the summons comes—delivered by a guard who won't meet your eyes—you know they were expecting this too. They've been moving you like a piece on a board, and only now do you see the game.

You go anyway. You always do.

You press your lips together to avoid commenting on the way they stand separately like this will erase what you overheard yesterday. Ambessa stands at the center of the room, her presence devouring the light. It bends around her, as though the universe itself cannot decide whether to confront or flee her. Caitlyn is there too, poised and watchful, her gaze darting toward you and away again.

You look at her with an apathy you designed to get you through burning cities and crumbling countries. You wear your mother’s jewelry today: a septum ring with delicate chains of gold stretching across your cheeks, glinting over your ears. Ambessa’s eyes catch on it, a flicker of distaste passing over her face. Your fingers twitch, but you don’t remove it.

Caitlyn moves toward you, her steps tentative. You step back, forcing her to stop and speak first. Always assume power. This is what they have taught you.

“Do you find it fun,” you ask, head tilting, “to be careless with me?”

Caitlyn halts, her expression caught between guilt and something softer. Regret, maybe. This may be your delusion. Ambessa remains impassive, her gaze fixed on you with an unsettling intensity.

“Little one,” she begins, the shared nickname making you flinch. “You should be grateful. I’ve only eased you into a better space. This insipid competition for my attention is draining. I need my best soldiers to remain the best, to work with one another fluently.”

“You’ve been awful to me,” you say, your voice directed at Ambessa but your eyes locked on Caitlyn.

The mask you wear shifts, and you let your anger surface. 

“Do not call me her name. I’m nothing like her.”

Ambessa’s expression betrays a flicker of disagreement, but she inclines her head, a mockery of deference. “As you wish, little one. What do you think, Cait? Do you agree?”

The nickname hits like a physical blow. Ambessa smiles wickedly. Cait. You used to call her that, back when you were little girls, not yet twisted. You saw her as some kind of beautiful flower, one that had learned to tremble tall amongst the trees.

“You could have spoken to me,” you say finally, your voice sharper now. “You didn’t need this...elaborate scheme of seduction.”

“Love is a good enforcer,” Ambessa says, her tone rich with amusement.

“You wouldn’t know love if it spat in your face,” you snap.

The room freezes. Caitlyn stiffens, but Ambessa’s expression darkens, her presence swelling like a storm. You meet her gaze, unflinching.

“Get out,” she says, her voice quiet but deadly.

Caitlyn hesitates, her body angling toward you as though to shield you. Her hands twitch, almost childlike in their uncertainty. “She’s only angry. Let me—”

“Get out,” Ambessa repeats, her tone slicing through the air.

Caitlyn turns to you, desperation softening her features. “Listen to me,” she murmurs, stepping closer. “I meant it. All of it. With you. I only—”

You think of the evening before. Your throat works until you have something to say; your hand moves before you can think, shoving her back. The memory of her warmth lingers on your palm like a curse. You try to lose it. 

“Get out,” you whisper. 

She stumbles, her expression crumpling into something fragile. You swallow hard, forcing yourself to stay cold, and distant. Caitlyn hesitates for a heartbeat longer, but then she turns to leave. 

“You always try so hard to be good,” you push out. 

She pauses, remains facing away from you.

“I meant it,” she says again. “With you.”

She goes, the door clicking shut behind her.

Ambessa doesn’t speak. She doesn’t need to. The silence between you is a battlefield, and you know you are primed to lose.

“Do you want to have me to yourself, or do you only wish to be my favorite?”

The question surprises you. However, you shouldn’t be surprised by anything Ambessa does. Her voice is calm, and measured, but it holds a challenge. There waits a quiet dare for you to step into the space she’s carved out for you.  

Your throat tightens, words lodging there like a trap. You hate the way your body reacts to her—the warmth that spreads under your skin, the treacherous pull of her presence. It disgusts you. It thrills you. You feel weak.

“I don’t want either,” you say, though the answer feels thin. A lie.  

Ambessa’s mouth curves into something sharp, more predator than a smile. “Liar.”  

Your hands clench at your sides. “I refuse to play this game, least of all with you.”  

“Oh, but you are, little one.” She takes a step closer, the sound of her boots deliberate, echoing in the cavernous space between you. “You’ve been playing since the day you first looked at me with that fire in your eyes. When I took you away.”

She clarifies as if you can’t quite recall. It grates at your nerves.

“You hate me, and yet you can’t help but ache for me. Do you think I haven’t noticed?”  

Your pulse quickens, the air between you crackling with tension. You hold her gaze, refusing to look away, even as heat rises in your cheeks.  

“Don’t flatter yourself,” you say, but the words lack conviction.  

Ambessa tilts her head, her gaze dragging over you in a way that feels invasive, consuming. “I don’t need to flatter myself. I see you. At first, I thought you might take after me in a way meant to replace your mother.”

She reaches forward, fingers the cold along the ridge of your cheekbones. 

“I see the way you tremble when I’m near, the way your apathy tastes so much like desire,” she continues.

She steps closer, and you step back instinctively, your spine meeting the cold stone wall behind you. You hate how small you feel under her gaze, how she makes the air around you feel heavier, suffocating.  

“You’ve used me,” you bite out, your voice shaking but firm. “You’ve used Caitlyn, too. You pit us against each other like we’re pawns on your board. Is that all we are to you?”  

Ambessa’s expression doesn’t falter, but something flickers in her eyes, something unreadable. “You’re more than that, but useful as pawns when it’s needed. Both of you. But you’re still mine.”  

Her hand moves, slow and deliberate, until her fingers brush your jaw. The touch is barely there, a whisper against your skin, but it sets every nerve alight.  

“You hate it so much when we touch you,” she says softly, her voice a low rumble. “But it’s that hate that keeps you sharp. That’s why I keep you close. Why we—I— can’t let you go.”  

You want to pull away, to spit something venomous, to remind her that you’re not some plaything for her amusement. But you don’t move. You don’t speak. You can’t.  

“Caitlyn wants your approval,” Ambessa continues, her thumb grazing the corner of your mouth now. “She craves it. But you... you want something deeper, don’t you? Something darker.”  

You flinch.

“I want nothing from you.”  

Ambessa leans in, her breath warm against your ear. “Then why are you still here?”  

“Because you summoned me.”  

“Because you wanted to come,” she counters, her voice soft but unyielding.  

You try to defend yourself, but she’s moved past this now. Instead, her hands come to the bend of your hips and lift you with an easy effort that makes your legs widen around the bulk of her body. With quick steps she moves you to the chaise just off to the side of the room, sitting you on top of it. The world is blurring; she is moving too quickly for you to dispute.

Ambessa’s hands are firm as she strips you bare and traces the shape of you. Like Caitlyn—or maybe Caitlyn, like her—she cups a tit in her large hand and squeezes. This version of it is more painful, different from its softer sister movement in the shower. 

She leans forward, opens her mouth, and swallows that loose circle of fat. You arch into the heat of her lips, moan low and reedy as she suckles at your nipple. Her teeth trap bits of skin between them, marking you purposefully. She pulls off and takes your other breast inside of her again to be teased and tainted by her bruises.

You rock gently, chasing the feeling. This time when Ambessa’s mouth leaves you, she presses your tits together and appraises them. 

“She said this was one of her favorite parts of you.” When she finds your confused gaze, Ambessa smiles. “Cait.”

You tense at that, and she chuckles. The sound infuriates you. Still, you do nothing as she sinks lower, her breath approaching the swollen pearl of your clit. Without a word she latches on to you, lapping idly at you as if you aren’t already dripping down her chin. She holds you as your body stutters, pleasure arcing through you like thousands of arrows. 

Ambessa is measured in this too. She sucks your folds into her mouth, laps at you carefully as she grips your ass. She makes you ride her, clit bumping against her strong nose as you follow her instruction. She draws back from you once, only to spread you apart and spit crudely into your cunt. She watches it travel down your slit, slicking you with her saliva, then she spits again and pushes it in with a finger.

Before she continues she glances at you and gives you another order.

“Say her name.”

You say nothing, mind racing. She slaps your ass, hard.

“Say her name. As you used to.”

You understand now. Again, you ride her tongue but when your mouth opens it is not her name that you say.

“Cait,” you moan, legs falling open even wider.

Ambessa adjusts you, slings your legs over her wide shoulders as she consumes you. She shakes her head, burying herself in your cunt as she leads you over the edge. Over and over, she laps at you until you’re panting hard like you would when sparring. This is sparring in another form.

“Oh, fuck,” you whisper. “Oh, fuck. Fuuuuck, Cait. Please.”

“Mmhmm,” Ambessa hums over your clit, and that’s the end of it for you.

You let out a sharp, shrill scream and attempt to bow over yourself with the strength of your orgasms. Ambessa refuses to let you, forcing you back and keeping your legs spread so that she can watch your cunt flutter wildly as you cum. 

“There you go,” she murmurs.

“Yeah,” you answer, dazed and nonsensical.

Your pussy spasms, pink and oozing juices like a wound. Your thighs strain with the stretch of remaining open. You think of the shower floor.

“Caitlyn,” you gaps. You can’t stop pulsing. “Yes. Fuck, Cait.”

There’s a thud outside, against the door as if someone has fallen.

Ambessa removes her hands. The silence stretches between you, taut and electric. Finally, you find your voice, though it’s hoarse and trembling. 

“If you think I’ll ever belong to you, you’re wrong.”  

Ambessa’s smile returns, wicked and knowing. 

“You are brave, but you already do, little one. You just haven’t admitted it yet. What do you think we speak of waiting for?”

The absence of her touch feels colder than it should. She steps back, giving you space, but her gaze remains heavy on you, a reminder that you are never truly free of her.  

“Go,” she says, her tone dismissive. “Think about what you want. And when you’re ready to admit it, you know where to find me.”  

You don’t wait for her to say more. You rise and make to leave, hands grappling over your clothes. You feel discombobulated like a puppet with its strings cut. You only manage to slide your shirt back over your head and it dusts the tops of your thighs.

Ambessa only watches your struggle. You hate her. You want her. You don’t know where one feeling ends and the other begins.  

You tug the door open and step back as Caitlyn spills back against the floor, hand still between her thighs and shining with her own pleasure. Her chest is heaving, her skin pink with the rush of lust and physical exertion. Her legs splay beneath her like a doll’s. 

She pulls her fingers out with a wet ‘schleck’ and tucks them into her mouth, cheeks hollowing as she looks up at you—unashamed. You say nothing, only bend down and tug her fingers from her mouth. You put them in your own.

THE COIN, FACE DOWN. — CAITBESSA.

The dormitory is devoid of you. Caitlyn is unsurprised.  

You are unused to being touched. You don’t know how to be wanted. 

Still, she worries. More accurately, she spirals. The ache of your absence gnaws at her in the quiet moments, like a phantom limb she can’t stop reaching for. She doesn’t know where you’ve gone. 

Ambessa is losing herself too, albeit in a different way. Caitlyn wonders if she has ever truly lost something before.  

The world continues to turn. They train, a familiar ritual that feels increasingly hollow. Their strikes are sharper now, their parries more reckless. Ambessa’s movements carry an edge Caitlyn hasn’t seen before, a fury barely leashed. She fights like she’s trying to exorcise something, and Caitlyn is often the target of that rage.  

A blow to her stomach knocks the wind out of her. A strike to her face nearly cracks her jaw. Caitlyn knows better than to show weakness, so she grits her teeth and pushes back, delivering her own brutality in return. She delivers as well as she receives. 

She kicks Ambessa in the mouth once, the impact jarring up the toned meat of her leg. The older woman’s lip splits, blood dripping down her chin, but she doesn’t flinch. In response, Ambessa hurls Caitlyn into the corner of the room. She skids across the mat, hitting the wall with enough force to rattle her bones.

Ambessa isn’t looking at her, stays crouched on the mat with her hand pressed to her mouth. Caitlyn struggles upward, sliding to rest against the wall. The fight had been nothing more than an outlet, and Caitlyn, nothing more than a tool.  Caitlyn struggles to her feet, leaning heavily against the wall. The guards in the room avoid looking at them, the air too charged, too dangerous. 

Something simmers in Caitlyn’s stomach, a volatile mixture of anger, frustration, and something softer she doesn’t want to name. She refuses to puncture it, afraid of what might spill out. She is already suffering enough, diseased with the spores of her affection for you. 

And Ambessa.  

The thought churns in her mind, dark and poisonous. Ambessa has become an obsession she doesn’t want to admit to, a shadow that looms too large since that moment in the room. Caitlyn hates her, resents her, envies her. She knows what you taste like, what you’d like. She too has been inside you. Caitlyn now has nothing; they are disgustingly equal.

 But beneath it all, she respects her. And that’s what makes it worse.  

When Caitlyn finally speaks, her voice is strained, biting. “Do you always break your toys this quickly, or am I just special?”  

Ambessa’s gaze finally lifts, sharp and cutting. She wipes the blood from her mouth with the back of her hand and smiles, a malignant curve that doesn’t reach her eyes.  

“Special?” she echoes, rising to her full height. “You think too highly of yourself, Cait. You’re simply better than most.”  

The nickname grates, a reminder of the intimacy they share now—unwanted, unavoidable, tangled in you. Caitlyn clenches her fists. “Don’t call me that.”  

Ambessa takes a step closer, her presence suffocating, magnetic. “You’ve been insufferable since she left,” she says, voice low and dangerous. “Do you think I don’t see it? You miss her like a dog misses its master.”  

“And you don’t?” Caitlyn fires back, the words cutting deeper than she intended.  

Ambessa’s expression darkens, and for a moment, Caitlyn wonders if she’s gone too far. But then the older woman smirks, cruel and knowing. 

“I miss her,” Ambessa admits, her tone a blade. “But not like you do. You ache for her because she is a twin to your pain, a foil to my approval. I ache for her because she belongs to me.”  

The words twist in Caitlyn’s chest, sharp and unbearable. “She doesn’t belong to anyone,” she snaps.  

Ambessa chuckles a low, bitter sound. “You’re wrong. [Name] belongs to both of us, and that’s why you hate me.”

Caitlyn’s breath catches, and she doesn’t deny it.  

Without you, they writhe like snakes, their weight pulling them into collision after collision. The mouth of the snake swallows the tail. The hatred between them is palpable, a toxic undercurrent that fuels their every interaction. And yet, when the nights grow long and the ache of your absence becomes unbearable, they find themselves drawn together.  

It’s not love, not even close. It’s desperation, a way to drown the pit you’ve left behind. Their intimacy is suffocating, a visceral reminder of everything they can’t have. 

When Caitlyn’s nails dig into Ambessa’s back, it’s not out of affection but frustration. When Ambessa’s teeth scrape Caitlyn’s collarbone, it’s not passion but punishment. They use each other because they can’t have you. After all, the emptiness you left is too much to bear alone.  

It’s never enough, no matter how fierce. Because they don’t want each other.

They want you.

Still, they try.

🕸

Again, the shower. 

They’re slightly cruel to one another. It fuels the high. 

Caitlyn snaps back to the moment as Ambessa needles a nail into the mottled skin beneath her shoulder blade, where a bruise sits thick and spreading. She hisses in pain, tits pressing further against Ambessa’s own. There are three thick fingers in her pussy and they fuck her in the way she needs. 

Despite the embarrassment, she lets her head fall onto Ambessa’s wide shoulders as she chases her orgasm. Her cunt is like water, dribbling down Ambessa’s wrist as she carves Caitlyn out. Again, a nail presses into the bruise. 

The motion is harsher this time around and Caitlyn cries out, throwing her head back so that her hair brushes the middle of her spine. Ambessa continues to toy with this patch of marred skin, teeth clamping on the wide skin of Caitlyn’s neck as the younger woman twists and shudders around her. 

“Good fucking girl,” Ambessa mutters, fucking her faster.

Caitlyn bounces to meet her, slamming herself down until her belly tightens and roars. Ambessa lifts her further, suctions her mouth around one of her perky tits, and digs deeper into the pink tight nature of her. Caitlyn roots a hand in her hair and slides the other down her body to collect pieces of that foamy, white ring gathering around Ambessa’s hand.

Slick with herself, she rubs tight, quick circles around Ambessa’s clit. The older woman’s cunt is large, folds heavy and leaking. Caitlyn feels her tremble and she moves faster, breath coming fast as the spray of the water slides down the crack of her ass.

With a muffled grunt, Ambessa cums. As she does, she bites deeply into the meager flesh of Caitlyn’s collarbone. Caitlyn whites out, eyes rolling back briefly so that she’s swaying and focusing on a blurred ceiling. Their orgasms warp and connect; they refuse to stop touching one another as if it will keep reality at bay.

The comedown is almost irritating, and in a frenzy, Caitlyn clutches Ambessa to her chest. This does nothing. 

She kisses Ambessa feverishly, practically mauling her, because the echo of your cunt is on her lips. Ambessa holds her, returns the kiss, then breaks it. 

“No matter how hard we try, she is not here.”

Caitlyn closes her eyes and her face pinches in pain.

“And where is she? Gone, and you are doing nothing to find her.” 

This close, Caitlyn can see Ambessa’s face twitch and melt into something revealing. Something rocks through her at the sight and she detangles their bodies.

“You cannot find her.”

The statement is accusatory, so much so that Ambessa surrenders and turns away. She shuts off the water; Caitlyn remains shivering. 

THE COIN, POCKETED. — YOU.

Your mouth tastes like metal and smoke. The streets of Zaun pulse beneath your feet, virulent and alive, and you can barely remember how many days it's been since you left them. Since you left her. Them.

You've gotten yourself into trouble - the kind Ambessa would have prevented, the kind Caitlyn would have shot through. Blood trickles down your side from where the knife caught you, and your vision swims with chemical fumes and exhaustion. You don't know where you're going anymore, just that you're going.

The world tilts sideways. You stumble and catch yourself against a wall slick with condensation. A familiar laugh echoes from somewhere above - it stops your heart, then starts it again too fast. You know that laugh.

When you look up, they're there on one of the suspended walkways - Caitlyn and that pink-haired girl, Vi. They haven't seen you yet. Vi has her hand on Caitlyn's waist, casual, proprietary. Something in you breaks and mends and breaks again.

Then Caitlyn turns her head, and her eyes find yours like they always have. The world stops. You try to run—you always try to run—but your legs give out. You thud to the ground. Mind heavy. Heart heavy. 

You hate her more than anything else in the world. You wish that was true.

You hear the clatter of boots on metal as she descends, and then she's there, gathering you up as if she hadn’t been entangled a moment before. She hooks a hand into your hair, and claws you into looking at her as she squeezes your face hard. Something inside of you understands that the action isn’t intentional, not this time.

She bends, hair falling from her hurried bun, and swallows you—grime and all. Her kiss tastes devastating and strains with relief, and you're too weak to fight it anymore. You push back, this time into her, and force her to hold you. She squeezes you tighter, moaning almost obscenely as she relapses and languishes in your feel, in your taste. 

Here is her sweet girl. Her sweet fucking girl. 

“Cait,” you moan.

She pulls away and strokes your baby hairs away from your forehead as you let out a feeble, wounded noise.

"Vi," she says, not looking away from your face, "help me. I need to get her back to Ambessa."

"This is your runaway?" Vi's voice is rough, knowing. "The one you've been tearing yourself up over?"

Caitlyn's hands tighten on your arms. "It's important for the mission that we-"

"Save it, Cupcake." Vi's laugh is different now, sadder. "I know what love looks like on you."

That training, that beloved animal comes back in full force, and Caitlyn looks up from beneath her lashes. Her face contorts and it’s the strangest she’s ever seemed to Vi. She reaches up, hooks a hand around Vi’s jaw, and drags her down. 

“Get it together, Violet. This is not your moment.”

Vi blinks at her, equal parts disturbed and titulated. Caitlyn lets her go, places that same hand on the peek of skin between the hem of your shirt and your linen pants. Why would you ever wear linen when running away? She looks back up again, traces Vi’s expression—analyzes it.

“I can love you both. I’ve done it before.”

Vi's laugh catches in her throat. You watch through half-lidded eyes as something passes between them— understanding, maybe. Or resignation. Your blood is making patterns on the ground.

"Fine," Vi says, and then she's lifting you like you weigh nothing, careful of your wound. "But if this gets me killed, I'm haunting you both."

“If she dies because of our procrastinating, I’ll do something worse than haunting,” Caitlyn snaps.

Caitlyn's hand doesn't leave your skin as you move through the undercity. You drift in and out of consciousness, catching fragments: Vi muttering about shortcuts, Caitlyn's fingers pressing against your pulse, the way they work together like they've done this before. They probably have.

"Stay with me," Caitlyn keeps saying, and you're not sure if she means now or forever. Maybe both. 

You think of Ambessa waiting, of how her hands will feel on your skin again, of how she'll look at you like you're something wild she's finally caught. You think of Caitlyn's desperation in the shower, that fucking shower and it’s cold water—of her mouth against your stomach. Of how they both break you apart and put you back together wrong.

"She's burning up," Vi says somewhere above you. Her voice sounds almost gentle.

"We're close." Caitlyn's voice shakes. "The extraction point is-"

"I know where it is." A pause. "You really love her that much?"

"More than is safe."

You want to tell her that nothing about any of you has ever been safe. Instead, you let the darkness drag you into its arms.

When you wake, you're in Ambessa's chambers. The sheets smell like her - lime and mango and earth. Caitlyn is curled against your side, her breath evening out against your neck. And there, in the doorway, Ambessa stands watching you both with hunger in her eyes.

"Welcome home, little one," she says, and steps inside.

THE COIN, MELTED INTO GOLD — CAITLYN & YOU & AMBESSA & YOU &.

Ambessa moves like smoke in the water. 

The room holds its breath as she approaches, and you feel Caitlyn's arm tighten across your middle—not protective, possessive. They don't look at each other. They never do. Their hunger is only for you.

"Did you think you could run from us?" Ambessa's voice is silk over steel, very careful in the moment. She sits on the edge of the bed, and the mattress dips with her weight. Her hand finds your ankle, thumb pressing into the hollow where your pulse beats rabbit-quick. "From me?"

You try to answer, but Caitlyn's mouth is suddenly on your neck, wet and wanting. She bites down, marking you, claiming you and Ambessa's grip tightens in response. They're going to tear you apart.

You realize, distantly, that you want them to.

"She's hurt," Caitlyn murmurs against your skin, but her teeth don't gentle. "We should-"

"We should punish her," Ambessa cuts in, and your body betrays you with a shiver. Her hand slides higher, past your knee. It makes you realize that you’re in nothing but a simple pair of baby blue cotton panties and a skimpy bra. Your tits spill out at the bottom. "Shouldn't we?"

Caitlyn makes a sound like drowning. Her fingers find the hem of your shirt and ghost over the bandaged wound at your side. "Yes," she breathes, and you feel yourself sinking, sinking. "But she's ours to punish."

"Ours," Ambessa agrees, and the word feels jagged.

You're losing yourself in them. A thought floats up through your hazy mind: that they refuse to acknowledge each other even as they work in tandem to break you down, to unmake you piece by piece. Their synchronized destruction should be beautiful to watch if you can remember how to open your eyes.

"Look at me," Ambessa commands and your body obeys before your mind can catch up. Her hand cups your jaw, thumb pressing against your lower lip. "She trembles so prettily for us, doesn't she?"

Caitlyn's answer is to drag her nails down your spine, making you arch into the touch. The pain blooms like ink in water, spreading out until you can't tell where it ends and pleasure begins. You're caught between them - Ambessa's unyielding strength and Caitlyn's desperate need - and you're not sure you want to escape.

"Tell us why you ran," Caitlyn whispers, but it's not really a question. Her fingers trace the edges of your bandages again, a reminder of what your foolish escape attempt cost you. "Tell us what you thought you'd find out there.”

"Freedom," you manage to gasp, and Ambessa's laugh is dark honey, sticky-sweet, and dangerous.

"Oh, little one." Her grip tightens, not quite painful. Not yet. "You're only free when I allow it."

She speaks only of herself, but you know the notion pertains to both of them. You know they're right. You've always known and it leaves something bitter in your mouth.  That's why you ran - not to escape them, but to make them chase you. To prove they would. To ensure they'd punish you when they caught you.

And now they have.

"Please," you breathe, though you're not sure what you're begging for. More? Mercy? Neither?

"Please what?" Caitlyn's voice has gone rough with her aching. Her teeth find your shoulder again, and you shudder. "Use your words."

But Ambessa's hand is sliding into your hair now, pulling your head back to expose your throat. "No," she says, and you can hear the smile in her voice. "I don't think she gets to speak anymore tonight. I think she’ll bore me with her useless whining.”

The whimper that escapes you makes them both pause, just for a moment. Just long enough for you to feel their satisfaction ripple through the air like heat waves. You might die this way, you’re realizing. They may build you up one final time, only to slit your throat at the time of climax.

Ambessa is practically stone with her tempered fury, and Caitlyn is antsy with her need. You never realized how much you riled them in the same manner they did you. Ambessa goes on to say more, filling the silence with something sick and cruel but Caitlyn has had enough now. 

She lurches up, rolls you over so that she sits atop just like the night she first kissed you. The night where it all burst. There’s a moment where she has a hand on your chest, pushing down as if resuscitating you. You don’t understand it until you look down and see the way the pressure makes your breasts surge and spurt from underneath your bra. She pushes again and again and again until you’re taking halting, broken sips of air. Over and over, your tits spill until she grows crazed and snaps the fabric off of you.

Ambessa only watches, though you notice her thighs spreading. She looks soft, her hair unbraided and haloing her face. She wears nothing but a silk yellow robe which displays her figure lovingly. Your cunt grows warm, tender.

Catilyn taps your cheek, brings you back to her. You can’t remember if the button-down she wears is yours or Ambessa’s. Maybe both. You wince at her weight on your stomach and she moves up and over your face. 

There’s no time to prepare for the way she comes down on you, her groan thunderous as her pussy settles on your parted mouth. You fall into line, give her what she wants.

Still, you are to be punished, so she sits for a long while. Just smothers you. Occasionally she grinds, filling your nose with her musk. You can feel her soft curls around your lips, and you arch up as if to crawl inside of her skin. This gets her to move, a slow rocking that amps up as you settle into making out with her pouring pussy. 

You kiss her here, over and over, dragging your tongue into the affair until she’s riding you. Your tongue slips in and Caitlyn quivers with a whimper as she rides your face harder. You bring a hand up to hold her, to prevent her from slipping but she smacks it away. 

“No,” she pants. “No—oh, fuck me. Holy shiiiit.” She bounces liberally, selfishly. “No touching.”

Caitlyn leans forward, supporting herself as she fucks down on you with fervor. You’re so distracted with getting her to fill your throat with her pleasure that you mistakenly lose focus on where Ambessa is. Which is why the press of her cunt against your own absolutely blindsides you.

She’s climbed atop the bed during the desperate coupling between you and Caitlyn, removing your panties so that your pussy winks at her voraciously. True to her nature she decides to take, to conquer you. You grip Caitlyn tightly, so tightly that she squeals and cums at the pain. 

You forget to let go, buck wildly as she creams over your nose and chin. It settles on you like sugar; she takes a long finger and dips it in—soft and sweet. You suckle at the pad of it, taking the digit into your mouth and moaning around it as Ambessa slides your cunts together. 

You can’t tell if you are one body or three or three-in-one. You feel enmeshed in the both of them. Your blood is theirs; your cunt is theirs. Maybe it is less togetherness and more possession. Ambessa groans deeply as you gush against her, the squelch both loud and quiet. Caitlyn is now off to this side—this you know. She has her other fingers playing with herself, shifts down to let them puncture her. 

She shoves another finger into your mouth and you gag, let her hit the back of your throat. Drool is coalescing and running over them. The sight makes Ambessa open you further, and hold you down as she slides your clits together over and over—harder and harder.

Your babbling makes the both of them smile, dark curves tinged with their sadistic pleasure. Again, the possession. Ambessa shoves Caitlyn aside and crawls over you to hook her thicker digits into your mouth. She drags you, your head lolling, as she reaches down and rubs your clit.

You scream, silent with your mouth open wide as you cum. This is not enough. It is never enough. She is back on you, like a lioness on a gazelle. Her pussy swallows yours, and Ambessa forgets you as she leads herself to that approaching golden horizon.

When she crests, she falls on you and you do nothing but accept her weight. You lay there, do this for what feels like years, until Caitlyn weasels behind you. Then you do it again.

🕸

You wake with a start, disoriented by the weight pinning you to the bed. Caitlyn's arm drapes loosely over your waist, her fingers curled like she’d been holding you even in sleep. Ambessa’s warmth radiates from behind you, her breath slow and even. The sheets smell of sweat and sandalwood, of something heady and unnamed.

The sheet clings to your skin almost oppressively, a reminder of last night’s twist of limbs and pleasure. You slide out from between them, careful not to disturb their slumber. Ambessa stirs slightly, her arm shifting, and you hesitate. Caitlyn murmurs something unintelligible, and you freeze. When neither of them wakes, you slip free.

You take Caitlyn’s robe from the chair by the bed, pulling it around your shoulders. The fabric is sheer, nearly useless, but it smells of her. You step onto the balcony, and the cool morning air kisses your skin. The horizon is painted in hues of gold and rose, the sun stretching its fingers across the sky.

You lean against the railing, the chill of the metal biting into your palms. The fortress sprawls below and blends into the distant city, a patchwork of shadows and light. For a moment, it feels like you’re the only person in the world. But the ache in your chest reminds you that isn’t true. 

You are loved. You are wanted. And it terrifies you.

You wrap your arms around yourself, trying to make sense of the ache in your chest. The robe clings to you, and the light hits your body in a way that feels exposing, even with no one watching.

A soft sound pulls your attention, and Caitlyn steps out onto the balcony, her hair a tumble of dark waves over her shoulders. She’s still half-asleep, her bare feet silent on the stone. When she sits beside you, the space between you feels both unbearable and necessary.

"Couldn't sleep, baby?" she murmurs, her voice rasping in the quiet.

You shake your head, eyes fixed on the horizon. You ignore the goosebumps that rise at the pet name.

 "I don’t know what to do with so much love," you say finally, your voice trembling. "From you. From her. It’s… too much."

She doesn’t answer immediately. Instead, she reaches out, her fingers brushing your forearm. You flinch, and she pulls back, pain flickering across her face. 

"Baby," she says softly, and the word lands like a stone in your chest. "I will undo this. I will make your living easier."

You exhale sharply, the sound halfway to a laugh.  “Will I always have to share you?” you ask. 

You don’t look at her. 

Caitlyn hesitates, then glances toward the bed where Ambessa shifts, her hand moving as if searching for you in her sleep. You glance over instinctively, the motion so natural it betrays you.

“I could ask you the same,” she says finally. Her tone is steady, but there’s a thread of something deeper woven through it—something sharp and sad. Your gaze flickers to her, then back to the bed behind you. Ambessa shifts again, her brow furrowing, and you instinctively turn to her. The action is so ingrained, that you don’t realize what you’ve done until Caitlyn speaks again.

“She pulls at you,” Caitlyn says, not unkindly. “I see it.”

You want to deny it, but the words stick in your throat. Instead, you say, “And you don’t?”

Her lips curve into a wry smile. “I pull at you too. But she’s… something else.”

You swallow hard, the weight of her words settling over you. “You didn’t answer my question.”

Your breath catches, and for a moment, neither of you speaks. The city stirs below, oblivious to the ache of your small world.

INTERLUDE: THE LIONESS, WITH THE COIN IN HER MOUTH. 

Ambessa lies still in the bed, her breathing measured and even, but her mind sharp and alert. She hears the murmur of voices from the balcony, the quiet cadence of Caitlyn's voice mingling with yours, a soft harmony in the cool morning air. 

Her eyes remain closed, yet her thoughts stray to the image of you wrapped in Caitlyn’s robe, the rosy light of dawn casting faint halos around your figures. She imagines the tension in your body as Caitlyn reaches for you, the way you’d shift, hesitant, but never pulling away entirely. It’s a dynamic Ambessa understands all too well: the push and pull, the magnetic sway you hold over both of them.

You’re the thread that binds, fragile yet unbreakable. It’s maddening. It’s beautiful.  

Ambessa shifts slightly, her fingers brushing the cool sheets where you once lay. The absence is temporary—she knows this. But the way you linger in her mind is something she can’t easily reconcile. She has always been a woman of precision, of control. Yet you are beginning to undo her in ways she cannot name, cannot stop, that she believed herself too old for.

Through the door left ajar, your voice carries faintly. When you and Caitlyn return, Ambessa will let you come to her. For now, she waits, her lips curving faintly, as if in a private, unspoken promise.  

“You’ll come back to me,” she murmurs under her breath, a whisper carried only by the stillness of the room.  

And outside, the sun climbs higher, gilding the world in its light.

RE: THE COIN, MELTED INTO GOLD — CAITLYN & YOU & AMBESSA & YOU &.

Caitlyn leans back, her eyes tracing your face. "We grew up together," she begins, her voice softer now. "Trained together. They taught us to kill, to win, to survive. But you…" She pauses, swallowing hard. "You were always my half. I can’t promise much, but when the pendulum swings, I will choose you to save. Every time."

Her words settle heavy in the space between you. You lean your head against her shoulder, letting the warmth of her presence ease the sharp edges of your doubt.

Caitlyn tilts her head, resting her cheek against your hair. "You’re half of me," she murmurs.

From inside, Ambessa’s voice calls softly, "Come back to bed."

Caitlyn shifts, pressing a kiss to your knuckles, then your nose, and finally your lips. It’s a lingering kiss, tender and unhurried as if she’s trying to pour every unsaid word into you.

"You’re my girl," she whispers against your mouth. "I love you, baby."

The declarations are so soft you almost think you’ve imagined them. But the look in her eyes tells you otherwise.

Ambessa calls again, her voice low and expectant. Caitlyn straightens, her hand falling away from yours. She glances at the door, then back at you. She stands, offering her hand to you. 

"Come," she says simply.

You hesitate, the ache in your chest a living thing. But you take her hand.

The sun exposes as it further moves toward its high point, casting the balcony in streaky light, but you feel no warmth. Only the quiet weight of something you can’t name, pressing into the spaces between your ribs.

And behind you, the world goes on turning.

“Come,” Caitlyn says again, her tone gentle but firm.

You go.

© hcneymooners.

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[trinnityn]

Countess Kiramman

Warnings: 18+ content below. vampire!cait, reader is on her period, pussy eating, biting, hair pulling, tit slapping, orgasm denial, tit sucking, did all that with the cloak still on so if you're into that, its a win, BARELY proofread

A/N: Happy late valentines day! i was busy chat💔 love you all though tysm for the likes on my last post🥳

you lay in bed, your room desolate and dark with the blinds shut as you pressed a hand onto your abdomen. its valentines day. you should be spending time with your girlfriend, not cooped up in your room like this! but can you really blame urself? your stomache feels like its been stomped on and- your thoughts were cut short as soon as you heard your door click, a slight creak following as it opened.

you turned slightly, and there she was. your girlfriend stood at the door of your bedroom, her cloak draped over her shoulders as the high collar over exaggerates her figure, bouquet at hand and chocolates at another. "may i?" she questioned with a slight tilt to her head. you nodded before cait extended a foot in.

she walked in before taking a seat on the side of your bed and carefully putting down her gifts on your nightstand before placing a soothing hand on your shoulder as she uttered out gently "how are you feeling, sweetheart?" all cait got was a whine from your lips. she took the initiative and spooned you from behind, pressing a soft kiss to the column of your neck.

"shh.. its okay, honey. you dont have to respond. just let me take care of you, okay?" caitlyn didnt wait for an answer as she worked her hand all the way down to your abdomen, massaging in a pattern in order to soothe your ache.

a small whine escaped her throat as she murmured "feels good.." cait's mouth twitched up to a small smile as she whispered gently "look at me. dont turn away from me." you turned your head to the side as your gaze meets cait's. her smile seemed to widen before leaning in for a kiss.

she deepened the kiss, her hand snaking behind your head to pull you in as she closed her eyes, nipping at your bottom lip for access you instinctively let her in, her tongue plunging into your mouth in a passionate kiss.

caitlyn adjusted her position so she was hovering ontop of you, she reluctantly pulled away from the kiss. "heard that an orgasm can actually relieve cramps." she mumbled agaisnt your lips. "you wanna give me one then?" you teased back with a small grin.

caitlyn trailed kisses down to your collarbones as her hands worked to unbutton your shirt, she stilled her movements to whisper softly "why do you think im trying to undress you right now?" before resuming. her hands succesfully let your top get undone, cait eyed at your tits before taking one of your hardened buds into her warm mouth.

you let out a satisfied sigh, placing a hand onto caitlyn's head as you caressed it softly, caitlyn looked up with you with an almost predatory gaze. she took her time switching from one nipple to the other as she sucked, producing a lewd slurping sound that went straight to your core before she let go of your nipple with a wet, obscene pop.

"where do you think i should touch next?" she poked fun at you with a smirk, knowing how you've been rubbing your thighs together for the slightest bit of friction to relieve the throb in between them. "cait.." you whined, elongating her name on your tongue.

you cup her cheeks as you run a thumb on her bottom lip, dragging it down slightly to reveal her sharp fangs. "just admit you're hungry." cait bit on your thumb slightly, hard enough to draw blood as it trickled into her mouth. you winced in pain.

"cait.. ouch." you withdrew your hands "im sorry. i didnt mean to bite that hard, i was being incautious." she spoke with remorse before she grabbed your wrist gently and placed an apologetic kiss onto the open cut. "may i countinue, darling?" You nodded with a small, reassuring smile.

caitlyn's focus trailed down to the waistband of your panties, hooking a finger onto them. her eyes looked into yours, searching for a twinge of hesitation in them. you nodded and caitlyn immediately jumped into action at the green light.

she slid down your panties at a leisurely pace before throwing them aside, revealing your glistening red cunt to her hungry gaze. it took every part of her being to not pounce onto you immediately. she gently coaxed your legs to open wider with a hand on both thighs.

your body cant help but surrender to her and let her handle every movement. she lifted a leg on each side of her shoulders before placing a small kiss on your twitching clit.

"remember your safeword, darling?" her hands rested on the underside of your thighs. "blue." you responded albeit impatiently. "good girl." she promptly resumed to the task at hand, diving into your crimson red coated folds. as she looked up attentively at every slight change in your features.

"cait.." you cried out as your face contorted into pleasure. small moans exited your throat as her tongue delved deeper into your sopping cunt, feeding her appetite with the tangy, coppery taste of blood.

her nose nudged on your clit as she drank in every fluid. her desperation producing wet, sloppy sounds before her hand traveled up to cup one of your breasts, taking your nipple inbetween her index finger and thumb. rolling it slowly, pinching it up.

your back arched instictively at the action. each motion of caitlyn's tongue in your tight chanel sparking stars in your vision, head rolling back as your hands fists the sheets underneath. you murmur breathlessly inbetween a string of wanton moans "cait.. im gonna cum.. let me cum, please."

a sharp slap landed on your breast as she looked up at you, an unspoken threat laid behind her eyes. "cait.. please." you pleaded as tears pricked at the corner of your eyes, the sting of your incoming orgasm stimulating your body further.

cait proceeds with pleasuring you, her hand resuming it's place on your boob. her own whimpers were muffled, vibrating against your pussy. your hand snaked to make a makeshift ponytail as your gripped onto caitlyn's hair, forcing caitlyn's ministrations deeper into your folds.

caitlyn hummed contently, but you? you were anything but content. the burn of your prolonged orgasm made your back arch as you pleaded "cait, please.. i cant hold it back anymore." your whimpers only getting more distressed.

caitlyn's tongue only got harsher on their relentless assault to your weeping pussy. your hips stuttered as they arched up, unable to restrain yourself anymore, you go against caitlyn's order as you finally let go of the coil tightening in your abdomen.

a lengthy moan of caitlyn's name left your throat as the small bud twitched as you gushed onto caitlyn's face. she quickly latched her mouth onto your aching clit to catch any stray drops into her mouth.

your orgasm eventually subsides as caitlyn's movements stagnated, pressing a farewell kiss to your wet slit as she lifted her face up.

"cait- im so sorry about your face, and i-" your panicked inquiry was interrupted by her chuckling, her pearly whites poking out as they were stained with blood.

"save your apologies after your punishment, darling." she uttered softly against your neck before sinking in her canines into the smooth skin of your neck.

this is going to be a long night.

A/N: can you tell this is rushed? this sucks so hard tbh. im gonna be releasing some vi hcs later today if i have the time LMAO cause i barely had any for this 1. love you all💗

-XOXO, Trinnifer 💋

[bueckersstuff]

HER NEW OBSESSION

Part I Part II Part III Pairing: Paige Bueckers x Reader

The soft glow of your bedside lamp bathes the room in warm hues, casting flickering shadows across the walls. Paige lies beside you, her blonde hair fanned out over your pillow, her blue eyes tracing the contours of your face with a lazy sort of fascination. Her fingers ghost over your arm, drawing invisible patterns on your skin, the sensation light enough to send a ripple of shivers through you.

"You're staring," you tease, your lips curling into a smirk as you turn onto your side, facing her fully.

"M'not," Paige murmurs, though the small grin tugging at her lips betrays her. "Just admiring the view."

You roll your eyes, but the warmth spreading through your chest is undeniable. This—whatever it is—has been going on for days, maybe even weeks now. Nights spent tangled in each other's arms, limbs draped over one another like it’s the most natural thing in the world. It's a silent routine neither of you have acknowledged out loud, but neither of you has dared to stop it, either.

Paige shifts closer, pressing against you until there's hardly any space left between your bodies. Her hand slides up your arm, tracing over your shoulder before settling at the base of your neck. "You’re warm," she mumbles, tucking her head under your chin like she belongs there.

You chuckle, wrapping your arms around her without hesitation. "And you’re clingy."

"Shut up, you love it," she shoots back, her breath fanning against your collarbone.

You do. You really do.

Her fingers play with the hem of your hoodie—her hoodie, technically, but she had tossed it over to you one night, and it somehow became yours. Now, it smells like the two of you, a mixture of her perfume and your detergent, an unspoken claim neither of you address.

Paige lifts her head slightly, her nose brushing against your jaw. "I should sleep, practice tomorrow."

"Then sleep. No one’s stopping you."

She exhales a quiet laugh before nudging her forehead against yours, her lips just a breath away. "You make it kinda hard when you're this close."

You don’t move, don’t pull back. Instead, you let your fingers trace slow circles against her back, committing the feel of her to memory. "Sounds like a you problem."

Paige hums, her fingers now threading through your hair, her touch slow and deliberate. "You're such a pain."

"And yet, here you are."

She doesn’t argue. Instead, she presses the softest, laziest kiss to the corner of your mouth, a touch so fleeting you almost question if it happened at all. But then she sighs, burrowing into you again, her grip around you tightening like she’s afraid to let go.

Neither of you speak. The silence between you is comfortable, weighted with something neither of you is brave enough to name. For now, it's enough to just exist like this—like two lovesick fools tangled in the sheets, living in a moment that neither of you dares to define.

You’re curled up on the couch, tucked into Paige’s side, your legs draped over hers as the soft glow of the TV flickers in the dimly lit dorm room. A movie plays, some overly romantic love story about a celebrity falling in love with a regular girl. You’re barely paying attention to the plot—too caught up in the way Paige absentmindedly traces her fingers along your arm, her touch featherlight yet electrifying.

This has been your reality for weeks now. Late nights tangled up together, stolen kisses in the quiet of your dorm, whispered words meant for no one else’s ears. No labels. No questions. Just the warmth of her presence and the way she looks at you like you’re the only thing that matters in a world that constantly demands her attention.

Your head rests against her shoulder as you exhale softly, watching the couple on screen navigate their love against the backdrop of fame. There’s a moment of quiet vulnerability between them, the kind that makes you ache for something you can’t quite name. Without thinking, the words slip from your lips.

“I think I’d want something like that… just, you know, a normal life. Something simple. Growing old with someone without the whole world watching.”

You don’t notice the way Paige’s fingers pause against your skin, how her body tenses just slightly before she forces herself to relax. For the first time in a long time, she feels something crack within her—a sharp, undeniable realization settling into her chest like a weight she can’t shake off.

She looks at you. Really looks at you. The way your eyes soften when you talk about the future, the way you absentmindedly play with the hem of your sleeve, so unaware of the silent war raging inside her.

Because she knows.

She knows she can’t give you that.

She knows that no matter how much she wants you—how much she’s grown addicted to your presence, to your laugh, to the way you fit so perfectly against her—she will never be able to give you the quiet, simple life you deserve. Her world is loud, relentless, and unforgiving. It demands too much, takes too much. It’s anything but normal. And you? You deserve normal. You deserve steady, safe, and certain.

Paige swallows the lump in her throat and forces herself to look back at the screen, pretending like your words didn’t just shake her to her core. She wants to tell you, wants to explain why she suddenly feels like running away, why the thought of wanting you so much scares the hell out of her. But she can’t. Because the truth is, she’s a coward.

So instead, she tightens her arm around you, pressing a kiss to your temple, as if that can make up for the words she’ll never say.

And for now, you don’t question it.

The change is subtle at first. Small enough that you don’t think much of it. Paige starts coming home later than usual, her schedule stretching into the night. At first, she tells you it’s just extra practice—Coach is pushing them harder, she says. You don’t question it. You know how serious she is about basketball, and it’s not like she hasn’t stayed late before.

But then, it happens again. And again.

One night, you’re lying in bed, waiting for her like you always do. But tonight, the silence stretches. You check the time. Midnight. You don’t remember the last time she got home this late. You fight to keep your eyes open, but exhaustion takes over before you hear the door.

At some point, you realize you’re falling asleep before she even gets back. The sound of her key in the lock, her bag dropping onto the floor—those little things that used to signal her arrival—aren’t waking you up anymore. You’re already deep in sleep by the time she returns, and when you wake up, she’s already gone again.

You’re not sure when she got back, but her side of the bed is untouched. She must’ve crashed in her own room. Your stomach twists, but you push the thought away.

It’s like you’re moving in opposite directions, barely catching each other in passing. You try not to think too much of it.

Then the weekends change, too. Saturdays used to mean lazy mornings tangled in bed, stealing kisses between half-asleep conversations, making breakfast together even if neither of you knew what you were doing. But now, Paige has plans. You don’t know what kind, exactly—she just says she’s busy. And she doesn’t offer more than that.

“Where are you headed?” you ask one Saturday, sitting in the couch as she throws on a hoodie. The morning sun filters through the blinds, casting patterns across her face, but she doesn’t look at you.

“Just out,” she says vaguely, tying the laces of her sneakers. “Gotta get some things done.”

You wait for her to say more. To give you something. But she doesn’t.

“Okay,” you say quietly, watching as she grabs her phone and tucks it into her pocket.

She hesitates at the door, just for a second. Then she leaves.

You stare at the empty space she left behind, a strange feeling settling in your chest.

It’s nothing, you tell yourself. Nothing at all.

At first, you make excuses for her. Maybe she’s just busy. Maybe the season is taking a toll on her. Maybe she just needs some space. But the doubt seeps in like a slow drip, filling the spaces where certainty used to be.

One evening, you casually ask again, "Are you staying late at the gym again?"

She barely glances up from her phone. "Yeah, something like that."

Something like that.

You swallow the lump in your throat and nod, pretending you don’t notice how distant she sounds. Pretending it doesn’t feel like she’s slipping away, one late night at a time.

The dorm, once your shared little world, felt colder. She was distant. Conversations were clipped, forced. The warmth in her voice when she said your name had disappeared, replaced by indifference. The weight of Paige's absence settles heavier with each passing day. The routine you once had—lazy mornings tangled in sheets, whispered jokes before class, her hand instinctively finding yours without a second thought—has become a distant memory. Now, it’s replaced by silence, cold and suffocating, wrapping around the dorm like an unwelcome ghost.

She comes home late. So late that you don’t even wait up anymore, your body giving up before your heart does. Sometimes you hear her, the shuffle of sneakers against the floor, the zip of a duffle bag, the sound of a shower turning on. But you don’t move. You don’t greet her. And she doesn’t greet you either.

Then came the rumors.

At first, you ignored them. It wasn’t uncommon for people to talk about Paige—her popularity, her presence. But the whispers were relentless. They carried weight. The flings were back. You heard about them from passing conversations, from girls giggling about how Paige had been seen with someone new. It wasn’t just one name being thrown around—it was multiple. The stories were different, but the theme was the same.

Paige Bueckers was back to her old ways.

Still, you refused to believe it. Not without proof. Not without her telling you herself.

Then you saw them.

Faint, but there—marks on her neck when she came home late one night, barely acknowledging you before shutting herself in her room. You heard the flirtatious lilt in her voice when she was on the phone. She didn’t even bother lowering her tone anymore, as if she didn’t care if you heard or not.

And yet, she never said a word to you. No explanation. No confrontation. Just distance.

And it hurt.

More than it should have.

One night, when she finally came home, you couldn't take it anymore.

"Paige."

She paused, her hand still on the doorknob to her room. "What?"

"Where have you been?" Your voice comes out small, but the weight behind it is anything but.

Paige doesn't even look at you. "Out."

"Out where?"

A pause. Then, "Does it matter?"

Your chest tightens. "Yeah, it kinda does."

She scoffs, rubbing a hand over her face. "You don’t own me."

That one stings. But you push past it. "I never said I did. But you just... you disappeared. You won’t even look at me anymore."

She stays quiet, jaw clenched.

You shake your head, laughing bitterly. "You know what’s funny? I didn’t believe any of the rumors. I thought, 'No, she would tell me. She wouldn’t do this to me. Not like this.'" Your voice cracks, and you hate yourself for it.

Paige finally looks at you, something unreadable in her eyes. "What do you want me to say?"

"The truth," you whisper. "Tell me this isn’t real. Tell me you’re not..." You swallow hard. "That you haven’t just been—been running around with random girls again like none of this meant anything."

Paige’s expression flickers for just a second—guilt, regret, something deeper—but it’s gone just as fast.

She hardens, turns away. "I never promised you anything."

"Are you seeing someone?" Your voice was quiet, but there was no mistaking the weight behind your words.

She didn't answer immediately. Just looked back at you, something unreadable flashing in her eyes. "Does it matter?"

It was like a slap to the face. "Does it—" You swallowed hard, trying to steady yourself. "Of course it matters. After everything—"

"We don’t have labels," she interrupted, her tone sharp. "You knew that."

Your stomach twisted. "That’s not the point, Paige. I—" You exhaled shakily. "I don’t care about labels. I care about you. And I don’t understand why you're—why you're doing this."

She clenched her jaw, looking past you instead of at you. "I don't have to explain myself to you."

You feel like the air has been knocked out of your lungs.

She stands, moving toward the bathroom, signaling that the conversation is over. But you can’t let it end like this. Not like this.

"Was any of it real?" The words come out choked, barely above a whisper.

Paige freezes in the doorway. Her back is to you, but you see the way her shoulders rise and fall, the way her fingers twitch at her sides. For a moment, you think she’s going to say something—something that will fix this, something that will bring you back. But she doesn’t.

She walks in. The door shuts behind her.

And you’re left there, sitting in the dark, realizing that maybe—just maybe—you were the only one who thought this was real.

You don't know when it started—this gnawing feeling of inadequacy, of doubt creeping into your bones like a slow-moving poison. Maybe it had been there for a while, festering beneath the surface, waiting for the perfect moment to seep into your thoughts. But now, it consumed you.

It wasn't just Paige's absence anymore. It was everything that came with it.

You tried not to care. You really did. But every time you closed your eyes, you saw her. The way she used to be with you, the way she made you feel like the center of her world, even if you never put a label on it. And then the intrusive thoughts followed.

Were you not good enough?

Had it been nothing to her?

Had you just been another name on a long list, another brief distraction before she moved on to the next?

You started comparing yourself to the girls in the rumors.

Were they prettier?

More exciting?

Was there something you lacked, something you failed to give her?

You wondered if, when she was with them, she thought about you at all. If she even remembered the way she used to hold you close like you were something precious.

It drove you insane, the not knowing. The lingering questions, the way your mind refused to give you peace.

So when the big game came, and the victory party followed, you made a decision.

You had to see it for yourself.

Had to put your questions to rest.

Had to stop this stupid, reckless hope that maybe, just maybe, Paige wasn’t doing what everyone said she was doing.

And if the rumors were true… if you saw it with your own eyes…

Then maybe, finally, you could let her go.

The pub is alive with flashing lights and bass-heavy music, the air thick with the scent of alcohol and sweat. Bodies sway, pressed together in an intoxicating rhythm, but your focus is razor-sharp.

You scan the room, heart pounding with a mix of nerves and something more dangerous—something close to dread. Then, like a nightmare brought to life, you see her.

Paige.

Surrounded. Girls draped over her, touching her, laughing, leaning in too close. And she—she’s letting them. Entertaining them. Smirking when one whispers something into her ear, leaning into another’s touch. Paige is in her element, basking in their attention like none of it matters. Like you don’t matter.

And then, as if she feels your eyes burning into her, she looks up.

Your gazes lock. For a moment, time seems to slow, the music a dull thrum in the background. You wait—hope—for something to flicker in her eyes. A sign of guilt, recognition, regret. But there’s nothing.

Paige holds your stare with a stoic expression, unreadable, detached. Like she doesn’t even know you.

A knife to the gut would have hurt less.

You almost crumble right there, almost let the tears spill in front of all these strangers. But pride keeps you standing, keeps you breathing through the ache clawing at your chest. Paige sees the flicker of pain in your eyes, the way your lips part slightly before you force them shut.

But she doesn’t move. Doesn’t react.

You turn away first. If she wants to pretend you don’t exist, then fine. Two can play that game.

You push your way through the crowd toward the bar, ordering the strongest drink they have. You down half of it in one go, desperate to erase the sight of her from your mind. You focus on the burn in your throat, on the blur of people moving around you. Anything but her.

Until someone steps into your space.

“Been watching you all night,” a voice slurs, hot breath brushing against your ear. A guy, taller than you, his grin lazy and overconfident. He leans in, too close, fingers ghosting over your wrist. “You alone?”

Irritation flares in your gut. “Not interested.”

“Come on, don’t be like that,” he coaxes, his grip tightening slightly. “Just one dance, sweetheart.”

Your jaw clenches as you try to yank your arm free. “I said no.”

The guy clicks his tongue, still holding on, still pushing. “You’re real pretty when you’re mad, you know that?”

Before you can shove him away, a new presence cuts in—solid, imposing.

A voice colder than ice. “Let. Go.”

Paige.

The moment Paige stepped between you and the guy, the entire party seemed to pause. The look on her face was murderous, eyes dark and sharp, cutting through the air like a blade. The guy, clearly drunk and emboldened by whatever liquid courage he had consumed, barely registered the threat at first.

"The fuck are you doing?" Paige’s voice was low, dangerous.

The guy scoffs, but there’s a flicker of uncertainty in his expression. “Relax, I was just talking to her.”

Paige doesn’t blink. “You were harassing her.”

“It’s not that serious—”

“Try touching her again,” Paige interrupts, voice quiet but deadly. “See what happens.”

The guy falters. Paige doesn’t break eye contact, her entire stance daring him to make another move. Finally, with a muttered curse, the guy raises his hands in surrender and disappears into the crowd.

Silence lingers between you. The pub moves on as if nothing happened, but everything inside you is trembling. Paige’s gaze shifts from where the guy disappeared to you, and suddenly, all that ice and fury is directed your way.

You took a sharp breath, shaking off the momentary shock. "I don’t need you to save me."

Paige finally turned to you, expression unreadable. "Then what the fuck are you doing here?" she shot back.

Your stomach twisted. "What the fuck am I doing here?" you echoed, incredulous, feeling something snap inside you. "Are you serious right now?"

Paige exhaled through her nose, as if already tired of this conversation. "You don’t belong in places like this."

That set you off. "Oh, but you do? Right. Because this is your scene, isn’t it? You and your little… fan club."

Something flickered in Paige’s eyes, but she didn’t react the way you wanted her to. She just tilted her head, crossing her arms. "I don’t know what you want from me."

"I want to know what the hell happened!" Your voice cracked despite your best efforts to keep it steady. "I want to know what I did wrong, why you suddenly started acting like I don’t exist, why I had to hear about your flings from random people instead of from you! Why you keep pushing me away like I was nothing!"

Paige’s expression hardened. "I never promised you anything."

Your breath caught in your throat.

The words landed like a physical blow.

She had never said those words before. She had never needed to.

"Wow." Your voice was hollow now, the anger drained and replaced by something far more devastating. "So that’s it, then? You don’t give a shit about me?"

Paige exhaled sharply, running a hand through her hair. "I—"

"Paige, what the fuck?" Another voice cut in, and suddenly, Azzi was stepping between the two of you, eyes flicking from your devastated expression to Paige’s clenched jaw. "What the hell is going on here?"

KK was standing a few feet away too, watching with a disapproving look that made Paige’s shoulders tense.

You swallowed down the lump in your throat, forcing yourself to laugh, though it sounded broken. "Nothing. There’s nothing going on. Right, Paige?" You turned to her, daring her to correct you.

She didn’t.

KK didn’t wait for Paige to answer before grabbing your wrist and gently tugging you away. "C’mon, let’s get you home."

You didn’t resist. You couldn’t.

The last thing you saw before turning away was Paige, standing there, watching you leave with an expression you couldn’t quite decipher. But it didn’t matter anymore.

That night, you vented everything to KK, voice cracking as you let out weeks’ worth of bottled-up emotions. She didn’t say much, just listened, holding you when your body shook from trying to suppress your sobs.

When sleep finally came, it wasn’t peaceful. It was heavy and suffocating, filled with the weight of unspoken words and all the things you wished you never felt for Paige Bueckers.

KK went back to the pub. She had seen Paige in all kinds of moods—pissed, cocky, exhausted, even heartbreakingly vulnerable—but this? This was different.

She watched as Paige stood at the bar, gripping her drink like it was the only thing tethering her to the ground. Her jaw clenched, her eyes dark with something that wasn’t quite anger but wasn’t anything good either. Azzi stood beside her, arms crossed, waiting for an answer.

“What the hell was that?” Azzi demanded. “That was low, even for you.”

Paige didn't respond at first. She just stared at the rim of her glass, like the whiskey swirling inside could somehow answer for her. Azzi sighed in frustration, shaking her head.

“We actually thought you were getting better these past weeks,” Azzi said, her voice quieter, like she was still trying to understand. “We thought maybe it had something to do with her. And then you pull this? You acted like she was nothing to you.”

That finally got Paige to react. Her grip on the glass tightened. Her head dropped for a second, her expression unreadable, and then she did something neither of them expected—she asked, voice rough and hesitant, “Did she cry?”

KK and Azzi froze.

KK recovered first, eyes narrowing. “Why do you care?”

Paige let out a slow exhale, tilting her head back as if trying to keep something from spilling out. “Just tell me.”

KK hesitated, then nodded. “Yeah, she did.”

Something flickered in Paige’s expression—guilt, pain, regret. It was all there for just a second before she forced herself back into that indifferent mask she’d perfected over the years. But KK and Azzi had known her too long, had seen too much. They weren’t fooled.

Azzi shook her head in disbelief. “Paige, what are you doing?”

Paige swallowed hard, still not looking at them. “Making her stay away.”

Azzi scoffed. “That’s bullshit. You want her. You need her. We all see it.”

Paige let out a bitter laugh, shaking her head. “Wanting something doesn’t mean you should have it.”

KK frowned. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Paige finally turned to them, her blue eyes clouded with something heavier than she could put into words. “I heard her that night. We were just watching some random movie, and she said it. Just like that. This little comment about wanting a normal life, growing old with someone without all the chaos. She didn’t even know I was looking at her.” Paige let out a harsh breath, shaking her head. “And that’s when I knew.”

Azzi watched her carefully. “Knew what?”

Paige’s jaw clenched. “That I can never give her that. My life isn’t normal. It never will be. I’m about to enter the draft soon. Everything is only going to get more complicated from here. I’ll be traveling nonstop, constantly in the public eye, surrounded by people who only want a piece of me. She deserves more than that. More than me.”

KK and Azzi exchanged a look. For the first time, they saw past Paige’s usual walls, past the cocky bravado and recklessness. This wasn’t just Paige running away because she was scared. This was Paige believing she wasn’t enough, that she would ruin something good before it even had the chance to become something real.

Azzi’s voice was softer this time. “Then why don't you explain it to her?”

Paige hesitated, then nodded. “I don’t do explanations. And she’ll end up hating me anyway if she sticks around long enough.” She exhaled sharply, rubbing a hand down her face. “It’s better this way.”

KK’s voice softened. “Is it?”

Paige clenched her jaw. “It has to be.”

Azzi shook her head. “The sad thing is, you might actually be right. If you can’t give her what she wants, maybe she is better off.”

Paige flinched, like the words physically hurt her, but she nodded anyway. “Yeah.” Her voice was hoarse. “That’s what I keep telling myself.”

KK studied her for a long moment, then sighed. “Then why does it look like it’s killing you?”

Paige didn’t answer. She just finished her drink and signaled the bartender for another.

The morning after the disastrous night at the pub, you wake up feeling like you barely slept at all. Your head is heavy, your chest is worse, and the sting of last night still lingers like an open wound. But nothing could have prepared you for what you see when you check your email.

Subject: Housing Reassignment Notice

Your stomach drops before you even open it. Hands trembling, you click on the message, scanning the words that don’t make sense.

You have been reassigned to your original dormitory, effective immediately. Please visit the housing office to complete the transition process.

What the hell?

You stare at the screen, blinking rapidly. That—That can’t be right. You never requested a reassignment. You love your dorm. Sure, the past few weeks have been rough, but that doesn’t mean you wanted to move. Frantic, you click ���Reply’ and type out a message, your fingers shaking over the keyboard.

“This must be a mistake. I never requested a reassignment. Can you confirm why this is happening? Did someone transfer out?”

You hit send, heart pounding in your chest. A response comes back almost immediately, making you flinch.

“The request was made by Paige Bueckers. Given the nature of the request, the housing office approved the change.”

Your breath catches. Your entire body goes cold.

Paige.

You read the words over and over again, but they don’t change. Paige requested this. Paige went out of her way to make sure you were removed from the dorm you shared.

A sick feeling twists in your stomach. Your heart clenches painfully in your chest.

What the hell is going on?

You knew she had been distant. You knew she had been cold, cruel even. But this? This is something else. This isn’t just pushing you away—this is cutting you out completely. And you don’t even know why.

Tears burn in your eyes as the full weight of it crashes down on you. After everything—after all the nights spent in quiet, unspoken tension, after all the moments you thought maybe, just maybe, she felt something too—this is how it ends?

It’s like last night wasn’t enough. Like humiliating you in front of everyone wasn’t enough. Now she wants to erase you completely. And the worst part is, you have no idea why.

You don’t know what you did to make Paige Bueckers hate you so much.

And that’s what hurts the most.

That evening, Paige finally came home from practice, sweat still clinging to her skin, exhaustion in the way she carried herself. But when she saw you standing there, arms crossed, waiting for her, something shifted in her expression.

She knew what was coming.

“You really went out of your way to kick me out, huh?” you asked, voice sharp.

Paige barely reacted. She set her bag down and exhaled. “It’s for the best.”

“For the best?” you echoed, stepping closer. “For who, Paige? Because it sure as hell isn’t for me.”

Paige ran a hand through her damp hair, looking anywhere but at you. “You’ll be fine. You’ll move on. It’s better this way.”

“Better how?” Your voice cracked. “You won’t even explain anything! One second, we were—” You stopped yourself before you said something you couldn’t take back. “And then suddenly, you’re treating me like a complete stranger. Like I don’t exist.”

Paige’s jaw clenched. “That’s exactly why you need to go.”

Your stomach twisted at her words. “Why?” you asked, softer this time. “What did I do to make you act like this?”

Paige sighed heavily, shaking her head. “You didn’t do anything. That’s the problem.”

You frowned. “That doesn’t even make sense.”

Paige finally looked at you, and for a fleeting second, there was something raw in her expression. Something vulnerable. But then it was gone, replaced by that same cold, indifferent mask she’d been wearing for weeks.

“This conversation is over,” she muttered before turning toward her room.

You watched her disappear behind the door, the sound of it closing like the final nail in the coffin.

Something inside you snapped.

You stormed into your room and grabbed your suitcase, throwing your belongings inside with reckless urgency. You refused to cry. You refused to let her have that power over you. If Paige wanted you gone, then fine—you wouldn’t waste another second in a place where you weren’t wanted.

You just needed to get through one last night.

You left your packed bag by the door and walked to the kitchen for a bottle of water. As you twisted off the cap, a loud crash came from Paige’s room.

You froze.

Then another bang. A thud. Something heavy slamming against the wall. Like she's wreaking havoc inside her room. 

Your heart pounded, and for a moment, you thought about checking on her. But then you hesitated. Maybe she was just rearranging things. Or maybe it was one of her late-night hookups. Maybe it was nothing.

You clenched your jaw and forced yourself to walk away.

Whatever it was, it didn’t concern you anymore.

Tomorrow morning, you would be gone. And this time, you wouldn’t look back.

You barely slept that night. Every time you drifted off, something pulled you back awake—the weight of knowing it was your last night here, the anger simmering in your chest, the hollow ache of something you couldn’t name.

And the shadow.

It would appear outside your door, a dark silhouette cast against the dim hallway light. You knew exactly who it was. You didn’t have to open the door to confirm it. Paige.

She never knocked. Never said a word. Just stood there for a few minutes before walking away, only to return an hour or two later. Like she was stuck in some endless loop, pacing outside your door, restless, conflicted, but never stepping inside.

You refused to acknowledge it. You were done with her games, done trying to figure out what the hell went on in that head of hers. If she had something to say, she should have said it. But no—Paige only knew how to push and pull, to keep you close enough to feel but far enough to never hold. And you were tired. Exhausted, really.

By morning, you didn’t even bother checking if she was there. You packed up the last of your things, took a final look around the dorm that had been more of a battlefield than a home, and left.

Paige wasn’t in sight. Maybe she was sleeping soundly, unconcerned, unaffected. Must be nice.

You scoffed to yourself, shaking your head as you stepped out into the cold morning air. No hesitation, no second-guessing. You weren’t looking back. You had a new dorm, a new start.

And this time, Paige Bueckers wouldn’t be a part of it.

taglist:@alilstressyandlotdepressy @iowahawkeyes22 @delusional-day-dreamer @unadulteratedcyclepaper @nicebellee @livelyblues @paige05bby @munchtotally @vicsstufff @bucketbueckers @avvwritesstufff @wheeniemyloove @sarahkaisley @bueckersverse @caffeine-pup @ellehoops @angelliicc @ilomiloblohshh @surferandskater5 @marissahowardd @carlaaaisinthehousew @potatobears-world @celestixldarling @extalstar @averagelobotomyenjoyer @magnificentwastelandarbiter @shartnugget26 @maddybuckets @bucketbueckers @drewlilbabe @aaaa46090493

[letorip]

kiss with a fist

“you hit me once, i hit you back, you gave a kick, i gave a slap”

===+++===

pairing: tara carpenter x reader

summary: tara needs a favour from perhaps the person she hates most on earth, but it just ends up drawing the both of you closer together.

warnings: explicit sexual content, fake dating 🤯, enemies to lovers, contrived plot because ha ha ha

word count: 4.8k

A/N: kinda had a lot of fun with this one. might do a part two, might just leave it as is, but let me know. inspired by kiss with a fist by florence + the machine (duh), lovely night from la la land, and various other inspirations.

===+++===

===+++===

The moment your front door opened on its hinges, Tara Carpenter was pushing past you and barging straight into your apartment, stepping right over the threshold and checking you with her shoulder. You barely had a chance to process it, before she had wandered down the hall and into your kitchen in a blur.

You rolled your eyes, knowing you were in for an annoying ass conversation and slamming the door shut. “What do you want?” You called into your own apartment loud enough for her to hear you in the other room.

“Don’t be a prick about it. This is the last place I wanted to go,” she shot back, and you sighed to yourself in your dark hallway before fixing your hair in the mirror and following her inside. There was only about an hour of her bullshit you could put up with and then you’d be saved by the bell anyhow.

“Whatever happened to ‘hello,’ Tara?” You said, crossing your arms and coming in to against the doorframe. She had jumped up onto your counter, legs swinging and fingers gripping the edge of the blue ice glass tiles. In her left hand she picked up the bottle of wine you had left out next to some glasses and began to read the label.

"Lecture me later,” she said, not looking up at you, You were about to reply, or more aptly, tell her to get the hell out of your apartment, but she put the bottle down and narrowed her eyes at you, clearly struggling to say what she was really there for.

“Look, (Y/n), I need your help.” Ah. There it was.

"Hah," you scoffed without hesitation. "No."

She threw up her hands. "I didn’t even say what I was asking for.”

“Still, no. I’m not helping you.”

“Could you just not be an asshat for five minutes and listen to me? Like, is that too hard for you? Are you medically incapable?" She shot back.

"You're sitting on my counter. I didn't bust into your house and start making demands but here you are in mine,” you said.

"I'm asking for a favour," said Tara, raising her voice. "Asking."

"Wasn't much of a question though, was it," you replied. Maybe being a dick back to her would make her leave. She had always been able to dish it but never able to take it, and you wanted to make her. "You said 'I need a favour.' There's no question in that."

"No, I actually said I need your help, now would you shut up and listen?"

You scowled. "Y'know, I'm not really in a helpful mood tonight."

"Like you have something better to do,” Tara scoffed, raising her eyebrows at you.

"And what if I do?"

"Then I'd say you're lying. What, you don’t want to help me because you’re watching your stupid show, or reading or something?” she challenged back, getting up off your counter and walking towards you. You straightened up, glaring down at her. She only came up to about your chest, but the short girl still did her best to seem intimidating.

With you she always frustratingly failed to even make the smallest dent, though that probably stemmed from the fact you could pick her up and punt her like a football if you wanted to. On the days she managed to really piss you off, the thought grew more enticing.

"For your information, I was supposed to have a date," you said. Tara blinked at this, looking down from your stupid face. You wore a thick black turtleneck and some pleated black pants that hung stylishly from your waist. The wine made sense now, and Tara felt like an idiot.

“What’d you pay them?” she clapped back, covering for the feeling of intense heat rising to her cheeks. This was humiliating. She had come begging for your help of all people- you, and now she had nothing to show for it but the stupid, smug look on your stupid, smug face.

“Ha ha,” you said, dryly. “Get out.”

“No.”

“Yes,” you insisted.

"So you're busy then…” she trailed off.

“Yes.”

“Nooo,” she groaned, throwing up her hands in frustration.

You weren't sure what it was, maybe the pout of her lip or the shining of her eyes, but you shut your own for a second and let out a sigh. "Why? What's the favour?"

Tara shook her head in a generally amusing display of defeat. "It's whatever. Have fun on your date," she said, heading for the door and trying to brush past you, but you reached your arm across the doorway, stopping her from going.

"No, what's-" you stopped, rolling your eyes upon realising you were about to help Tara Carpenter of all people- "What's the favour, Tara?" Her face instantly lit up with a bright, beaming smile, the exact opposite of what it had been before, and it suddenly occurred to you she had been playing you like a fiddle.

"Oh my god, you're actually helping for once! Did you finally wake up on the right side of the bed?”

"Don't push it," you muttered. "I don't even know what I'm agreeing to, yet."

"See, about that..." she trailed off.

"What.”

“We have to make Sam really, really mad.”

"What?”

"Yeah..."

You shook your head at her. "Never mind. I'm not helping you anymore."

"What!?"

"You're trying to get me murdered," you said. "I don't have a death wish."

Tara was fully frustrated now, dark eyes fiery and staring up at you in the candle lighting. “You don’t even know what it is you’re doing to make her mad yet!”

“Doesn’t matter, if it’s Sam I don’t want to do it.”

“It would be a big help!” Tara said, clasping her hands in front of her like a prayer. You narrowed your eyes at her, more upset her expression and clear desperation was actually working on you, and that you felt compelled to help this idiot with an undoubtedly idiotic plan.

“What are you trying to do?”

Tara jumped up and down in excitement, smiling widely in a way you had rarely seen her. “Okay! Okay, so Sam said last month that she didn’t want me going to parties and meeting people because she was worried they were murderers.”

“Uh huh,” you said.

“Buuut, she said I could go if I had someone always with me. Like, someone with me that she approved of. So I didn’t wander off to hook up or drink, which is, y’know, the actual fun ‘college party’ stuff.”

“Uh huh.”

“The thing is though, that if I had a ‘partner,’” she raised her fingers to put quotes around it, “then Sam wouldn’t need to worry about me doing that, because she’d assume I’d be with them, hanging out, or even if we did go to a party, it would be together. Buddy system style.”

You raised your eyebrows, realising where this was probably going. “Uh huh?”

“Which is where you’d come in. Sam wouldn’t trust just anybody, if I told her I was seeing someone. But she would trust someone from our group, who she knows for sure isn’t going to murder me. And you- as fucking annoying as you are- are exactly that.” She had a twinkle in her eyes when she explained it to you, and you realised Tara had probably been plotting this- or at least considering it- for a while now, the little devil.

“You really expect Sam to believe we can tolerate each other?” You asked, squeezing your arms tighter against your chest. “She knows how much I hate you, and only person I hate more is her.”

“Trust me, I’ve complained about you to her too,” she rolled her eyes. “But you were literally my only option. Call it a romance of passion. We only ‘hated’ other to cover up for our real feelings or whatever. Sam doesn’t have to like you but she definitely trusts you.”

“How romantic,” you wrinkled your nose, disgusted by the suggestion. “Wait, why am I your only option? Chad is right there, he’s already in love with you and everything. He’s like the built-in boyfriend.”

She winced. “See, I thought about that. But I just know it would probably hurt him, with the hooking up and it not being real. He probably wouldn’t feel too great about me ‘cheating’ on him.” Tara did the finger quotes around it again and you let out a whistle.

“Wow, so you do have a heart.”

She scoffed. “More than you do. Besides, we only need to pretend to be together until I find someone actually tolerable. After that, you’re free again.”

“I had a date tonight,” you narrowed your eyes at her.

“But you’re still here talking to me for some reason?” She raised her eyebrows at you. “And the way you said ‘had’ I’m thinking you don’t anymore.” Tara could be annoyingly perceptive sometimes. She always seemed to zero in on the way you spoke or what you said.

“I wasn’t too excited for it anyways,” you grumbled, and Tara laughed, realising she had been correct and being all too pleased with herself. She clasped her hands together.

“Well then. Are you going to help me, or are you going to glare at me some more?”

“The second one sounds really appealing right now,” you shot back.

“Oh, come on. Don’t be too proud of an asshole to admit this is a great plan.”

“It’s a terrible plan, and it’s absolutely going to fail when Sam tries to murder me.”

“But you didn’t say no.”

You looked at her for a long minute, contemplating if this was really the path you were going to go down. You let out a sigh, shaking your head. “I’ll do it. But you’ll sure as hell owe me.”

“Yeah yeah,” Tara waved you off, beaming from ear to ear. “Great! We’re going on a double date with her and Danny this Friday.”

“What?!” Your mouth dropped open.

“Yep,” she said, annoyingly skipping down your hallway. “I’ll text you the address and time!” she said.

“Now wait a minute-” you called after her, but she had already latched open your door and left, leaving you to watch her go. Fuck, this would end terribly. You sighed again, taking out your phone to cancel your date.

===+++===

This was so unbelievably stupid. The longer you stood outside the Italian restaurant, the more you regretted agreeing to help her.

The restaurant was nice at least, with giant marble stones and dark red accents, and you could see through the massive float glass windows that the lighting mostly featured romantic candles and potted floribunda roses against dark wood. It would ironically be the most expensive date you ever had, and you realised that with bitter sentimentality.

Tara was late, like always, and you had begun to pace along the sidewalk, tracing the cracks with the centre of your shoe while you waited for her. It was boring, out on the street, and the more couples that passed you and walked right inside, the more nauseous you felt. You grabbed your phone out of your pocket, thumbing over the cracked display.

She was ten minutes late. You swiped open your text messages, still seeing nothing from her.

are you here yet???

You sent the message hastily, waiting for the typing icon to pop up or even show that she read it, but nothing. Suddenly the screen lit up and your phone started vibrating it, and you almost dropped it in surprise. “Fuck,” you cussed quietly, seeing the call incoming screen and Little Shit (do not pick up) appear at the top. You frowned, hitting the green button and accepting the call.

“Where the hell are you??? I don’t know if you noticed but we’re late,” you immediately said into the phone, aware of just how annoyed you sounded.

“Relax,” replied Tara on the other end of the line, and you could hear her eye roll from here. “Danny is a late guy too, Sam gets on him all the time for it.”

“Yeah well, I’m standing outside waiting for your late ass.” You felt someone awkwardly push past you and you winced, spinning around to usher them an apology.

“I’ll be there in a minute, I had to pick something up,” she dismissed you. “Just don’t let Sam and Danny see you. I told them we were showing up together.”

“Well how the hell am I supposed to do that?” You frowned, looking around. There was a row of bushes off to the side but you were too tall and not at all willing to crouch behind them like an idiot.

“I don’t know. Figure. It. Out.” Tara spoke slowly like you were a child and you narrowed your eyes.

“Y’know, I’m doing you a favour?”

“Ha!” Tara exclaimed, and you hissed, pulling your ear away from the phone’s speaker at the loud noise. “So you admit, it was a favour!”

“Shut up and get your ass over here," you grumbled before hanging up shortly, looking around and wandering down a side alley. It smelled disgusting back there, in the ironic, almost-dark of sunset, and it would've been a lovely night to take a walk on, had it not been for wasting it on Tara of all people.

You pulled out a box of cigarettes from your pocket, fumbling one out and sticking it between your lips. You stuck the box back in your pocket and pulled out your fancy lighter that had your name engraved on the side, thumbing over the lettering for a moment before lighting the cigarette and sticking it between your two fingers.

It felt stupid, to standing there next to the dumpster and watching some rats scurry by, but you let out a huff of smoke, remembering how much Tara had seemed excited for the parties and having fun. You didn't like her very much, nor could you really claim to be much of a saint, but you weren't a monster either.

"What are you doing??" called a voice from the end of the alley, and you spun to see Tara near the line of bushes with a bouquet of flowers in her hands. She had her eyes narrowed at the cigarette, looking frustrated.

"Having a smoke. Why, want one?"

She let out a sigh of exasperation, marching straight up to you. "You can't go on a double date with my sister smelling like cigarette smoke. You know she hates that kind of stuff."

"I've smoked with her, before. Her and Mindy," you argued, pulling it from your lips to take a breath in. "I've literally given her cigarettes."

Tara glared at you, taking it from your hand and crushing it under her heel. "Yeah, well, she still hates you, and now that we're allegedly 'dating' it's different. We can't give her any reason not to trust us, and you smoking cigarettes is going to make her think I'm going to start smoking cigarettes."

You shrugged. "If she hates me so much, then she's never gonna let us 'hang out' alone or go to parties anyway."

"No, she-" Tara rolled her eyes. "She hates you, but she sure as hell trusts you. Enough to babysit me."

"Fine. What's with the flowers?" you asked, crossing your arms.

"You got them for me," Tara shrugged. "Pinnacle of romance."

You whistled to be funny, but it was a little bit impressive that she had planned that out. The plan wasn't especially well thought out, but she at least had her moments of surprising intelligence, which you couldn't begrudge her.

"Well then," she frowned. "Let's go, lover." She clutched the flowers in one hand and slid her arm to interlock with yours. You narrowed your eyes but started to walk her in.

"Don't call me that. It's weird," you muttered.

"Get used to it. Tonight we're the happiest couple on planet Earth."

The restaurant was somehow even nicer on the inside than it had been on the outside. Tara gripped your hand, tugging you along with her as she headed towards Sam and Danny's table and followed the waiter, but you were looking a little dumbfounded at the marble columns and Italian frescos painted to the walls and roof.

You made your way back, led into a giant room with a lot of people. Danny sent you a welcoming wave when they saw you; Sam looked like she was about ready to blow a gasket. She stared at you, eyeing you up and down and then lasering in on the bouquet in Tara's hands with a frown.

"Did you tell her your secret partner was me???" you whispered to Tara as you approached.

She smirked evilly. "Nope."

Fucking amazing. "Hey guys!" Danny said, friendly and open. He seemed just thrilled to be there, while Sam seethed right next to him. Tara smiled right at her sister, gesturing for you to sit next to her.

"Sorry we were late," Tara says, a little awkward but trying to seem comfortable. "We were, um..." she looked at you for help.

You blanked, throwing out the first thing you could think of. "Kissing!"

Sam nearly spit out her water, eyes widening at staring at you. Tara whipped to you, jaw slack and you sent her a sorry glance. Improv was not your thing by any means.

"Um," Danny blinked at you. "No worries. You're here now," he said with an awkward smile. His hand went to Sam's, trying to give it a comforting squeeze, but she looked like she wanted to jump over the table and then jump you. She was glowering.

"So," she said, eyes narrowed. "How long has 'this,'" she gestured between you and Tara, "been a thing?" She looked at you intensely, and you looked to Tara, trying to shrug it off. You both laughed, playing the part of the happy couple.

"Oh, a month," you said.

"Two months," Tara said, at the exact same time. Fuck.

You tried not to glare at each other. "Well, which is it?" Sam squinted at her sister, and Tara sent a kick at your leg under the table. Your knee hit the bottom of the table with a painful 'thud,' and it took everything in you to not yell out in pain from your knee cap hitting the wood.

You tried to smile it off. "Tara just said two months, because we went on a few study dates, but it wasn't official until a month ago."

"So two months then," Sam said, crossing her arms on the table.

"I get it," Danny said, nodding. "I'm bad at dates and stuff too," he laughed a bit. "I almost forgot how long Sam and I had been together after our four month anniversary." You nodded, sending him your best grin. Sam didn’t look too happy about that either, though.

"Yeah, long day, I guess." Tara said next to you, sending you her best smile, her hand coming up to rub your back. It was weird, having her this close, but you put on your best face, as if she touched you all the time.

"You go to Blackmore too, right?" he asked, and you nodded. "What do you study?"

"I'm in architecture," you replied. Finally, something you could talk about without feeling like you were crossing a minefield. From the corner of your eye, you could still see Sam staring you down with suspicion.

"Oh! That's awesome!" Danny replied, taking a sip of wine from his glass. "I love architecture, it's interesting."

"Mhm," you nodded, looking over at Tara and smirking with just a hint of malicious glee. "I tease her- my degree is actually useful. People don't really like film majors. They usually smell bad."

"Do they?" he asked, genuinely curious, and you turned back, nodding.

"Yeah, it's an unfortunately common stereotype. Film majors are annoying, smelly-," your words were cut off, feeling Tara's nail dig into your back for revenge and trying to stifle a wince. She gave the table a fake giggle.

"Okay, that's enough out of you," she said, and you grinned, cursing her out in your head.

"Why didn't you tell me it was (Y/n), Tara?" Sam asked, leaning forwards and studying you both. She seemed a bit miffed with the whole situation. You sent each other fake smiles, as if you were about to share a secret.

"Well," she said, trying to seem excited. "We just didn't want anyone ruining it, really. It was kind of a secret, and we didn't know what it would turn into. But it's just...it's been so fucking magic."

"Magic. Mhm," you hummed in agreement, looking off into the distance and pulling out the menu. You were just a bit too hungry to keep up with the game for the moment. Seriously? she shot you a glare, and you snapped to attention. "It is genuinely one of the happiest times of my life," you rushed, quickly smiling and then dropping your attention back down to the menu to look at some pasta.

“Does Chad know?” Sam asked, sitting back and staring at you both. Tara shook her head.

“Not yet. I don’t want to hurt him, but really, (Y/n)’s the one for me.” This was also a little bit impressive. Tara seemed to be a far better actor than you were, and Sam just nodded, suspicious but trusting her sister’s words.

===+++===

The moment you walked down the block and out of Sam and Danny's eyesight, your hand dropped from Tara's. The sun was just about setting in the distance, and city traffic was starting to slow down a little.

"Oh. My. God. Her face!" Tara said, laughing. She keeled over, and you smiled a little, remembering Sam's look of disgust, but quiet monitoring of your hand clutching onto Tara's. She looked like a very conservative nun, witnessing a sin being performed in real time. It was a little funny, you had to admit, not that you'd ever be caught laughing along with her.

"Danny seems nice," you said, after you walked a little farther.

Tara nodded. "He's surprisingly not a douchebag. I thought he would be, like you or something, but he's not that bad for Sam."

You scoffed. "I'm not a douchebag."

"You definitely are," Tara said, shaking her head. "One month because it wasn't official? You said we were going on dates before then. That's definitely douchebag behaviour. Sam probably thought that meant you were seeing other people."

"Oh."

"Yeah, oh," Tara said, rolling her eyes. "And 'kissing'??? Literally anything would've been better."

"I'm trying to help you, it's either this or nothing," you huffed in annoyance. "I'm not an on-the-spot person."

"Clearly," Tara said, shaking her head in overdramatic emphasis. She stopped suddenly and you jerked backwards, seeing her mess with her shoes.

"You good?" you asked, shoving your hands into your pockets.

"These damn shoes- making me walk home- god dammit," she grumbled, messing with the straps and the buckle on the side. You waited patiently, leaning against a stone wall as you waited for her to finish.

The sky above you had turned a deep purple, small hues of orange and pink in the form of clouds sitting at the edges. It was really something, and you stopped to watch it, whistling. Tara jerked upwards, planting her foot down to stomp her shoe into place.

"What is it?" she asked.

"The sky," you said, and she craned her neck up to watch it with you. "It's just really beautiful tonight."

She hummed for a moment before looking back to you. "It's a shame I'm spending it with you, of all people," Tara snorted. "I'm sure this would be romantic to any other couple."

"It would probably really be something," you said absentmindedly, looking up in thought. "A real waste on you and me though."

"Glad we agree," she said, leading the way. You and her had taken a separate path from Danny and Sam under the guise of getting some ice cream, but neither of you were willing to pay for it. Instead, you had to figure out what you would do with ten extra minutes.

"Do you want to cross?" you asked, gesturing to the other street, she nodded and you walked up, pressing the button. When you turned back to her, her nose was wrinkled.

"What?"

She shrugged. "Nothing. You just hit the button weird."

"What?" you blinked at her. "How can someone 'hit the button weird'?"

"I don't know, but you, like, pushed it weird. With your fingers."

You rolled your eyes. "Do you have a problem with everything I do?"

“Yep,” she nodded back. “It’s annoying.”

You guys kept walking in silence for the next block or two, making a square so that you could return to Sam and Tara’s apartment together. The sun had disappeared now and faded into night, and when you turned the corner to split off, she tugged on your arm.

“Hey wait, you have to walk me home.”

“What?” you raised your eyebrows at her.

Tara shrugged. “You have to, to make Sam think we’re dating.”

You blinked at her. “But we live on opposite sides of the city.”

“Still.”

“Tara if I walk you home I’ll miss the last train,” you grumbled. “That’s a long ass walk.”

“Cmon, we have to or she won’t believe it.”

You frowned. “You’re paying for my cab then.”

She sighed. “Fine, but come on.”

She tugged you down the long strip by the hand, stopping suddenly, a block from her apartment. “Here wait,” she said, turning to you. “Give me your jacket.”

“What?” you raised your eyebrows at her. “Why would I want to do that?”

“Oh just do it, do you have to argue about everything?”

You took it off with a glare, handing it to Tara. She tried to slide it on but it was massive on her, so she bunched up the sleeves. With the flowers in her hand and your jacket, it definitely looked like you two had gone on a date.

She grabbed your hand again, pulling you forwards along the street and smiling brightly in case anyone looked out the window and saw you both. It felt a bit odd to be playing dress up, but it was helping someone out, so you didn’t begrudge her on getting you to smile either.

“Wait wait wait,” Tara said, stopping abruptly.

You groaned. “Now what.”

She pulled you to the side, near a row of shrubs that sat next to the red brick of her apartment building. “Sam’s watching us through the window.”

You turned your head, trying to see for yourself, and there she was, hanging right out the window and watching you with intense suspicion.

"Don't look at her!" Tara snapped at you, whispering with a glare. You rolled your eyes.

"What do you want me to do then, Tara?"

She frowned, biting her lip while she thought. She gave you a grimace. "We need to do, like, a goodnight kiss or something."

You glared at the suggestion. "I think I'd rather die."

"Trust me, I don't want to either," she said, glowering right back at you. "But if we do this now, we won't have to ever again."

You thought for a moment. She'd probably taste disgusting anyways, and then it would just confirm what you already knew- you hated Tara Carpenter. "Fine. Just convincing enough though."

"Okay," she nodded. When neither of you made a move to close the distance, she frowned. "Do like, a countdown or something?"

"A fucking countdown," you repeated. "We're not five."

"Just do it!" she demanded, glaring again.

"Okay, fine, Jesus Christ. Three...," your face moved a bit closer to hers. "Two," you muttered quietly, still leaning in. "One," you said, and then Tara pushed her face onto yours.

It was a chaste kiss, probably sprouting from the fact that neither of you especially wanted to do it. Her lips were softer than you expected them to be and her breath nowhere as near as it would be in your head. You pulled away quickly, and there she was, smiling up at you in the fake way she had been at the restaurant.

"Party next Friday?" she asked. "Now that Sam thinks we're together she won't care if I go. Just pick me up and we can go 'together.' Plus there's a cute kid from my film class who said she would be there."

You nodded. "Whatever."

"Great," she said with similar shortness, and she brushed right past you, heading into her building. You watched her walk off, making sure she got in the door safe. Sam was still looking at you from overhead, even when Tara had gone, and you could see Quinn standing behind her, looking with morbid curiosity.

It had never even crossed your mind to kiss Tara, just because of how annoying her personality was, and you would have rather died than admit it had been nice- that she had been nice for a night. Instead you turned around, walking off. You were sure Sam was still watching you, as you went.

===+++===

part two??? it shouldn't be too long before the next one, i had to split this up because it was getting insanely long and there's another half to the story. i didn't want this one to be like 8k words long, i'll just probably have another one that's 4-5k soon.

[rivalswrites]

Valentine's special 2/4

Before you read, please be warned that I'm writing based on my impressions of them not only in the game (though it's the biggest inspiration), but some of them with the movies/shows in mind too.

Summery: giving everyone on the Marvel Rivals roster a kiss (with plot!!)

Valentine's Masterlist

Underage characters and animal characters will be platonic (there will be a reminder for each one)

Characters included: Bruce/Hulk, Invisible Woman, Iron fist, Jeff the Shark, Loki, Luna Snow, Magik, Magneto, Mantis

“You are just the cutest thing ever” Bruce said, holding your head in his hands while sitting on the couch. He had you sitting in-between his legs, which were laying all across said couch, enjoying the warmth of your body laying on top of his.

Usually he wouldn't be so affectionate, worried about… other variables of his, but tonight was different. Tonight Bruce was tired, and all he wanted to do was be with you- even if it meant he'd probably fall asleep on the couch and get back pain in the morning.

“And you're so handsome” you said back, smiling up at him. Your arms were around his waist and you cuddled on top of him. “All of you” was added after.

Bruce let out an amused ‘hmf’ and you could see a soft blush on his cheeks if you squint hard enough. “All of me? Even the big green pea?” That got a laugh out of you.

“Yeah, even the hulk” you mutter out as a reply, laying your head on his chest and humming in content. His hands moved from your face to your back, drawing patterns, and probably equations too, on your back lightly.

Silence reigned over the living room, it would almost be deafening if it weren't for Bruce’s heart beating into your ear where it laid. “Love all of it” was let out in barely a whisper. His hands stopped tracing their patterns, instead grabbing onto your shirt in fistfulls, “can't say stuff like that” he murmured, laying his head back to barely touch the arm of the couch.

“But it's true.” Your elbows pushed you up to try and see his face, “I do love all of you, I don't care if it's you or Hulk.”

When his head came back up to a regular position, his entire face was flushed. “Don't just go saying things like that,” his eyes closed and his face looked so adorable when he was flustered like this “gonna get a heart attack.”

“You of all people know that's not how you get a heart attack.” You whispered while leaning up to meet his face.

He was surprised by the kiss, but not unwelcoming of it. His arms tightened their hold and his fists scrunched up your shirt, trying to pull you closer as he pushed against the kiss to deepen it.

The two of you laid in bed giggling together, it was still early morning but you bother were definitely supposed to be up and running for the day by now. Instead of being responsible adults the two of you stayed under the sheets and made jokes to each other, the early morning fog making everything a tad more funnier than it should be.

“You're ridiculous” Susan said, her head resting on your chest while holding in her laughter horribly. “I'm serious! He really did say that.” You replied, an arm waving in the air as the other one sat entangled with her hair.

After you said that she laughed some more, moving her head back to let it all out. God she was gorgeous like this, in the lighting that perfectly framed everything.

You laughed along too, but eventually it died down to deep breaths to catch both your breaths. Holding each other in a tender embrace, you let out a deep yawn. “Guess we should get up and be productive people, hm?” You said and pulled her closer.

“Yeah, maybe” she replied, pulling you just as close.

Neither of you had any intention of letting go to get up, but you both knew it had to happen eventually. Susan deeply sighed before pulling her arm out from under you and perching herself up. “There's only one way to start the day perfectly.” She said, smiling at you.

“And what's that, my love?” You asked, your hand in her hair moving to push it out of her face. “This” she said before lounging at you.

She practically tackled you with all her force, laying on top of you as she smothered your face in kisses. “Susan!” You said with a shout, laughing and grabbing onto her waist as she continued her attack. She pulled back and smirked, “what, can't handle it?” she said with a giggle. “Oh, I can handle it, can you?” You said before grabbing her face with both your hands and pulling her back in for a passionate kiss.

Lin was met with a bunch of flower in his face the moment he opened his bedroom door, eyes going from them to you multiple times as he processed what was happening.

You had a big smile on your face, holding up the single flower for him. After taking a moment, he smiled back and took the flower from your hand and examined it on his own. “What's this?” He asked, looking up at you with pure curiosity. “A flower” you replied with a proud tone.

“Well obviously, what's it for?” His tone was playful, not at all taken back by the dumb response you had given him. “For you!” Again you gave a vague reply.

He was used to your vague replies, and even found them funny, but his curiosity begged for a real answer- so he pressured more questions. “Where'd you get it?” “Nature” “did it cost anything?” “I paid with my love for you” “why today?” “Why not?” It went on and on, like a game of cat and mouse, except he had no way of winning this one.

There was only one thing to do, pull out the big guns.

“I'll give you a kiss if you actually tell me.” In an instant he saw your eyes light up, immediately making eye contact with him as you spoke.

“I found it in someone's front lawn on my way here, I thought it was cute and wanted you to have it.” Straight forward, “I believe you owe me a reward for being so honest.” and humble.

He laughed, looking back down at the flower, “I do, don't I?” Lin pulled you in by the waist and dipped his head down, capturing you in a soft kiss full of love- as they always were with him. When he pulled back he observed your star struck face with a smile. “Thank you for the flower, baby. But maybe don't go stealing from random neighborhoods next time.”

(Platonic)

The little shark had wanted to play outside, and as the self-designated caretaker of the little guy you were the one to take him outside. You sat on the porch stairs and watched as he ran around chasing everything- literally. His tail? Chased. That butterfly? Chased. The wind? Chased.

Jeff never ceased to amaze you on how much curiosity one creature could have- he was adorable.

You had spent maybe an hour outside by now, resting your head on your palm and watching Jeff explore a yard he's seen a million times before. By now you were getting hungry, and you sure Jeff was a little too, so you started thinking of lunch. Sandwiches sounded good, and they were simple to make, quick and easy so the little guy didn't have to wait.

Jeff easily noticed when you stood up, stopping his playtime and trotting over to you to see what was up. His face looked up at you with what you thought was a cute smile and big beady eyes. “Ah, Jeff you're so cute” you praised, crouching down to scratch the underside of his chin. He enjoyed this, letting out a cute noise and letting his tail wag. “How's about some lunch? You hungry?” The question easily peaked his interest, turning in circles to show it.

He easily followed you inside, even pushing the door closed after- something he had learned himself somehow, thank goodness he doesn't know how to open doors… right?

The kitchen was empty and made it easy for you to take your time and whatever you wanted from the fridge or cabinets. You settled on some sort of meat you found in the fridge (ham? Maybe turkey?) since it looked fine and passed your smell test- Jeff's too, but he ate anything so smell didn't really matter.

After making the sandwiches, five in total, you sat on the floor and pushed the plate with four of them towards Jeff, taking one for yourself to have. “Enjoy little buddy” you said as you watched the little shark absolutely devour them, taking the late with them. Glad you used a paper plate.

While you were eating yours Jeff came up and laid on your legs, pushing up against your hand that sat on your thigh. Deciding you could always make more, you tossed the rest of your sandwich- which was less than half- and watched as he scrambled to catch it. “You're adorable.” You muttered as he came back to you with a large smile that showed off all his teeth.

He let out the most adorable sound as he jumped onto your lap and licked your face, leaving an uncomfortable trail of shark saliva. “Thanks buddy” you said, using the bottom of your shirt to wipe off what you could.

Honestly it shouldn't be a surprise to you, coming home to find him bathing in rose petals and bubbles. He was a man who liked to be pampered, by others or herself didn't really matter.

“Be a dear and wash my hair for me, hm?” He slurred out, using a charming smile to coerce you into following his question- though he really didn't need to, you would've done it if he had ordered you too. Kneeling down you roll up your sleeves and grab the cup sitting on the edge.

Loki closed her eyes and sighed in bliss as the water washed over his head, relaxing into the water even more when your hands started to brush through his hair. “So good to me” he muttered.

“I try” you replied, rubbing the luxurious shampoo onto his scalp and down her long hair. Your fingers scratched at her scalp and that definitely got a satisfied reaction from her- seeing as he kept leaning his head into your hands, you happily obliged and applied more pressure onto her head. The deep exhale of his breath was a show of satisfaction.

It continued on like this, a cycle of singing his hair and applying hair products of all kinds- he insisted you used them all, to make sure her hair glowed. She still wanted to lay in the water, after you were done, so you started to stand up to give her space and alone time. Her hand rushed up and grabbed yours, water splashing out of the tub at how quick he was “stay,” her tone was demanding, but also quiet, “please.”

It was rare for him to ask such things of you, so you did. You took a towel and set it in the ground before sitting on it, your arm leaning on the tub. Quickly she took the opportunity to lay her head on your arm, a hand of his coming up to rest on your wrist- her pinky was outstretched to interlock with yours.

The both of you sat like that in silence for what could've been 5 minutes to an hour, it didn't seem like either of you cared which one it was.

His head would readjust sometimes, until eventually it was up on your shoulder and she had to hunch over to stay comfortable.

“The water is cold” the silence was broken by his comment. Unsure of what she wanted as a reply you went with the safest option, “want me to rerun the bath for you? Make it warm again, my love?” “No” his reply was quick, hand on your wrist tightening its grip. “Alright” was your reply, a quiet one as the silence set in once more.

You looked over to her, cheek resting on his wet hair with a smile. Your hand came up to rest on their head, thumb rubbing up against their cheek in comfort. It was all he needed to raise his head and look up at you- leaning into your palm.

It was too hard to resist, you couldn't help it when she looked at you with those eyes- vulnerability showed in them, something only you were allowed to see. So even so slightly you leaned in and pressed a kiss against Loki’s own lips; enjoying how soft they've always been compared to your most likely chapped ones.

It was late at night and you were in the dining room, sitting with two bowls in front of you- even though it was just you. This had been like the fifth time you'd checked the time, but you waited patiently, you knew she was a busy person.

The front door keypad sounded and went off after the correct code was put in before the door opened and closed soon after; which still didn't stop the cold breeze of outside meeting your face briefly. You could hear her, her shiver from the outside as she took her shoes off and put them in the shoe rack, replacing them with the bunny slippers you had gotten her ages ago.

“Oh,” she mutters, leaving the entry hallway to get a peek at you “I didn't realize you'd be awake still.” Seol looked guilty, reaching up to scratch at her hair nervously.

“Wanted to wait for you, should I not have?” You asked, turning in your chair to look directly at her. “No- No!” She shouted, “I mean- I don't mind it, you staying up for me.” her corrections on her reply were quick and worried.

She comes and pulls the chair next to you out, to sit in, and faces you like you do her; your legs interlock. “I'm sorry I'm always so late.” Her hand comes up to rest on your bicep, rubbing up and down in comfort. “It's alright, I know you're busy” you muttered in reply, taking her hand on you and holding it in yours. “You could make it up, though.” That caught her interest.

“Oh? How's that, my love?” Her face cracked a smile, if she knew you- which she did- she knew where this was going.

You didn't verbally reply, simply reaching up and pointing to your lips with a smile. Seol’s smile got brighter with your movement, raising her hands to cup your face. “I can't deny you.” She said before tugging you close and bumping faces with you with a laugh. Eventually her lips met yours and her laughs turned into little giggles instead; you even let out a few of your own.

The kiss was apologetic and sweet. She was busy a lot, you knew what you signed up for.

“Why do you care so much?” She sighed, laying her head on the foot of the bed as she laid on her stomach, “it's a shirt! Just pick one, baby, not that hard.”

Illyana wasn't one for fashion, despite looking good in everything, so when you propositioned her to pick your shirt because you couldn't decide she started complaining- nicely because it was you. “C'mon Illy- I can't decide!” You said back, holding up like three different shirts “That's why I'm asking you!”

This obviously wasn't going anywhere, as it always did when you asked her to help you with your wardrobe choices. “Why don't you wear that one shirt, the one I like?” She replied, rolling onto her back and turning her neck to glare at you from upside-down.

“It's dirty, I don't want to smell bad when I go out.” You said on the bed next to her and tossed the shirts onto her legs. “Hey!” She scoffed playfully, not actually bothered by it.

“Hey” you replied, leaving down to rest your hands on her stomach as she adjusted her head to look up at you. “Why don't you just stay inside today, then you don't have to pick out a shirt.” She suggested, raising her eyebrows in a silly manner while smirking at you.

“I'm not gonna walk around shirtless all day at home, you sucker.” You grabbed into her nose and shook her head playfully. Her hands raised to meet yours, tugging it off of her and smiling up at you. Her hands brought yours back down to rest on her stomach.

Quiet washed over the two of you, leaving both to just look at each other with smiles. “You could wear one of my shirts.” She offered, cutting through the silence. Pretending to think you looked up, “You do have some nice ones…”

“Alright, one of yours it is.” You pat her stomach and she laughs. “See? Not so hard after all,” Illyana reached up and grabbed your face. “I deserve a reward for being so helpful.”

With no complaints you listened to her suggestion, leaning down and giving her a sweet kiss. Her hands tangled with your hair and tugged slightly, always having to be in control in some way.

Somehow it was a quiet evening, for everyone. You sat on the couch with Erik, holding onto his arm and practicing melding into his side. “You're so warm” you told him earlier when he questioned it, but quickly left it alone with your answer being satisfactory.

He was reading a book, something random he found in the Baxter Buildings extensive library- it was probably something science related, maybe philosophical, but you didn't pay attention or care enough.

Your head rested on his muscular shoulder, not the most comfortable pillow but a favorite. He never showed it, but he loved when you cuddled up to him, you knew imso because he'd always make space for you to do so. Willingly he would move his arm to just the right position to where your arms could easily wrap around it so you could hold him. What a sweetheart.

Erik would let it occasional hums, something he unconsciously did when he was satisfied with his environment- when you were there.

“Please, my dear, stop staring at me.” He cut through the silence, but didn't look up from his book. “I don't know what you're talking about.” You said, feigning stupidity at him obviously catching you in the act of ogling over him. “You are right, I should not assume that you were staring at me when I can very obviously feel your eyes on me” Erik replied sarcastically, putting an ear on the page he was reading so he could close the book and put it aside- finally looking at you with a light smile.

“Exactly,” you agree, playing along “assuming things never work out well.” The both of you chuckle and smile at each other, leaning in more- if that was even possible.

“You are so right, my dear, as always.” his eyes were gentle, for a man that had gone through everything he has. “I always am,” you said back, thumbing at his shoulder gently.

His hand comes up to cup your cheek, rubbing his thumb across it before running back and playing with the ends of your hair. His touch was so gentle, like you were the most precious thing in the world; because you were, to him you were.

Without another word needed between either of you, you moved to sit up more and leaned up to give him a kiss. He gladly returned it, using his hand in your hair to tug you closer, giving all of his love and attention to you.

“I can feel your love for me.” She said, thumbing at your hands that rested around her. You both laid in bed, her back to your chest as the moonlight passed through the curtains of your room. “Well I sure hope you can,” you replied, pushing her up against you more “make sure you get all of it.”

Mantis laughed at your comment, turning her head to see you and in turn show you her smile. “I certainly am.” She replied with a giggle.

You leaned your head down and nuzzled into her cheek, pushing yours against her like a cat. “Good, it's all meant just for you.” Her smile widened. Mantis pushed against the bed and turned around so she could wrap her arms around you like you were with her. The room became quiet again, besides your breathing, and you both just looked into the others eyes; full of love they were.

Leaning down you pressed a quick kiss against her nose, pulling back with a smile as blush dusted her cheeks a little. In turn she leaned up and pressed a kiss against your chin, and the game was on. The both of you took turns pressing kisses against the others face, it felt like enough time had passed to where every inch of both your faces was covered in kisses.

“I win.” You said, leaning down and capturing her lips before she could ask what you meant. She didn't complain, her hands raising to rest under your sleep shirt and pulling you closer.

When you pulled away it took a moment for the both of you to catch your breath, but she was quicker. “I didn't know this was a game, I think there needs to be a rematch.”

[anas-aspiration]

Silence & the bedroom.

Summary: toxic!ellie x reader, You recently decided to keep distance from your situationship because of how she treated you. Ellie uses the fact that you’re heartbroken to get into your pants and it works.

Warnings: dildo (r!receiving), oral (r! Receiving), masturbation (e!receiving), making out, manipulation from ellie, kind of virginity loss (r!receiving) ellie kinda rough.

Taglist hehe: @clairoscharm

"You know she doesn't love you, right?" Ellie said, looking deep into your eyes.

You became silent. She said it so confidently it was almost like you're the weird one for thinking it was a bold thing to ask. Her hand lay on your thigh, drawing small shapes around your soft skin anticipating your answer. Even though you both had been best friends for years, it had still been the first time Ellie said anything of that nature to you.

"Um, well..." you sank further into the bed, searching your mind for a way to answer her question, because the truth is that you really don't know.

"It's okay..It's hard when someone treats you like that." She spoke softly, putting her hand up to your cheek.

"Yeah, it fucking sucked. Who the fuck leaves someone in the dark like that?” You began tearing up. “I felt like nothing.”

“Babe, you are not nothing. I love you.” She said, taking your face in both hands.

“I love you too Ellie.” Your expression lifted.

There was a quiet moment filled with tension between the two of you. With every second passed you both inched closer to each other, without a word exchanged, and your lips locked.

Her hands fell from your face down to your sides. She was moving quickly. The kiss deepened and she took your hand in hers leading it to your shorts which was her way of telling you to take them off. You backed out of the kiss, hands still frozen in place.

“What are we doing?” You whispered.

“You need this baby. Don’t you want to feel loved?”

Your eyes gave a blank expression, but you nodded. Time blurred in your dazed little head. The only things you were aware of now were Ellies hands on you and the ache in your heart, and she could tell because of the way your eyelids drooped at each lick of her tongue that you were hers now.

“Ellie..” You moaned out while arching your back into her.

“I know baby..” she mumbled softly between your thighs. She knew everything, about you, about this situation, she held the cards. She was well aware that you never gotten exactly this far with anyone else. You never liked anyone enough to bother. “Mm baby?”

You lifted your head off the pillows to look at her, your expression turning euphoric at the sight of her below you continuing to work at you between words.

“Do you think you can take a little more?“ She looked at you with puppy dog eyes. “For me?”

“Yes yes. Please.” You pleaded.

She took her fingers out of you, causing your breath to become shallow. She quickly returned from her closet with a pink dido. She tapped your lips twice.

“Open.”

You complied.

She didn’t waste a second teasing or even preparing you before she went as far into your throat as she could. She did give you a second to breathe after this but then continued at a steady pace, earning sweet gagging sounds from you. She slipped a hand into her pajama pants so swiftly it almost didn’t catch your attention. You could already hear how wet she was, had you wondering how long she had this planned. The whole night?

She finally let you breathe, dragging the dildo down past your stomach and to your slit. Your heart was racing, but you kept a brave face without struggle.

You winced as she brought it inside of you yet adjusted to the stretch in seconds. It wasn’t long before she found a rhythm pumping her fingers into herself while also handling you.

“Fuck, you’re ughh- so beautiful like this.” She groaned above you.

All you could do was stare up at her, yearning for something you were already receiving. It felt like something was missing. She was sitting with one leg under the other, hand still pumping underneath her boxers, and on her face she wore this expression telling you she was close. She began bucking into her palm, causing you to meet her pace with your hips.

“I’m close..” you mumbled.

She didn’t respond, looking like she wasn’t even acknowledging your presence rather trying to chase her high. With a fee more pumps, she Let out a lengthy moan, pushing the dildo far as she could into you by reflex, and causing you to come with her. There was a few moments of heavy breathing between the two of you, and that aching feeling in your heart disappeared. The feeling had gradually faded, and as you opened your eyes, you saw Ellie avoiding your gaze, regret etched across her face. Your heart sank even deeper than it had been before.

A/n! I decided to make it just toxic ellie instead of toxic ex ellie. Also feel like this wasn’t toxic enough for some people cause other drabbles be literally insaneee, but whatever. Hope you liked it😊 and if you have any ideas request them I will like 99% do them and quick.

[na0koz]

Hear me out on nsfw hcs for jinx bc I KNOW she’d be insane 😭

soo freaky u r right nonnie.

MDNI. cw blood, knives, mentions of guns, panty stealing, bondage

toxic!jinx masterlist

bites you. bites you hard. like hard enough to draw blood, and she’ll lick all of it up. what can she say, she likes the taste of your blood. the taste of anything of yours actually.

is a menace with a strap. she dicks you down so well. she is genuinely crazed by making you cum she doesn’t even care about her own orgasms. she can do that in her own time while she thinks about how you cried on her dick earlier.

likes to watch you get yourself off as well. sometimes she will beg you to just let her sit and watch you play with yourself. it’s not even like she wants to do it return, she just is so obsessed with how your body twitches and responds to your own movements.

i think she is definitely into some stuff that any normal person would find her disgusting for. for example the whole blood thing. she’d probably do a lil something with knife play, like tracing down your chest to your stomach to jussttttt above your pussy with a knife, watching you tremble and whimper under the blade as you try your best to stay still and save yourself the wound waiting to happen. or maybe even guns. russian roulette or something like that.

she’d also like sucking on your tits for sure. gently biting your nipple as she stuffs your pussy with her slender fingers or a dildo. she’s deduced exactly what makes you cum the hardest and she’s figured out it’s her biting on one of your tits while she fucks her fingers into your pussy.

bondage is a given. keeping your hands tied behind your back while she has you on your knees, thrusting into you from behind with her strap. she thinks you just look so pretty with your face squished into your creased bedsheets while you cum on her dick.

panty stealer alerttttttt. used and clean. one of each, maybe two. we were all thinking it. we know she steals your stuff. to be honest though, she doesn’t have them purely so she can get herself off to their scent. sure, it turns her on, but she also just wants every single part of you memorised, every scent and every part. (but she mainly just uses them to make her cum when she’s in the confines of her bedroom without you to help).

she can also keep it simple, she’ll very very happily scissor with you and hump her puffy clit on yours. such raw and simple sex gets her off so much and more often than not, it makes her squirt all over you.

she likes to ride your face too i think. like her properly grinding her hips down onto you not just you casually eating her out. she just really loves marking you as hers and she classes cumming on your face as one of the ways to do this.

in short, you are covered in hickeys and bite marks 24/7, and jinx is a perv.

[latenightreadingpdf]

Beneath the Moonlight - Remus Lupin

₊‧⁺˖⋆ Masterlist ⋆˖⁺‧₊

Summary: In the days leading up to a full moon, Remus Lupin receives an anonymous gift basket filled with potions, chocolates, and a carefully-brewed Wolfsbane Potion.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

Y/N considered herself a rather observant student, especially when it came to the Marauders. It was hard not to notice them, really. They were practically a four-person parade through the halls of Hogwarts—pranks, laughter, and charm trailing behind them like a comet's tail. James Potter with his messy hair and endless attempts to impress Lily Evans, Sirius Black with his dazzling grin and effortless cool, Peter Pettigrew following close, always eager to please. But one Marauder stood out to her more than the rest. Remus Lupin.

There was something about him that had Y/N hooked from the beginning. Perhaps it was his quiet brilliance or the way he seemed to carry a world of mysteries in those warm, honey-colored eyes. Or maybe, it was the way new scars seemed to appear on his face and hands every so often, faint but unmistakable. They fascinated her, those scars, and as her gaze lingered on him in class or at meals, she found herself trying to figure him out.

And, admittedly, somewhere along the way, Y/N developed a bit of a crush on him. But who wouldn’t? He was brilliant, always top of the class without trying too hard, and—and yes, he was gorgeous. Handsome in that annoyingly effortless way. Soft, tousled hair that practically begged to be touched, sharp cheekbones, and—Merlin, those knit jumpers that always made him look so adorable. How was that fair? It was like he’d been sculpted by some benevolent god of tall, bookish, sweater-loving dream boys.

But Y/N’s interest in him was more than just attraction. There was something… otherworldly about him. She’d started to notice patterns—how he would seem worn and pale every few weeks, how he would disappear entirely from school grounds for a day or two, only to return looking exhausted and, if possible, even more scarred than before.

A month ago, after endless speculation and careful observation, Y/N had arrived at a conclusion: Remus Lupin was probably a werewolf. She wasn’t completely certain; it was more of an educated guess. But what could she do with this theory? It wasn’t like she could walk up to him and blurt out, “Hey, Remus! You don’t know me, but I’ve been watching you for months, and I just wanted to ask, are you, by any chance, a werewolf?”

The thought alone made her cringe. Y/N sighed, tapping her quill against her parchment. Remus Lupin might be full of mysteries and maybe—just maybe—she’d get the courage to actually talk to him someday.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

The full moon was only a few days away, and Y/N could already see the toll it was taking on Remus. He was limping slightly, a stiffness in his stride that made her heart ache, and the dark circles under his eyes were more prominent than ever. He looked exhausted, like he hadn’t been sleeping in days, and though she knew he had his friends—the Marauders, always fiercely loyal—she couldn’t help but feel he needed more comfort than they could provide. She wanted to do something for him, something small but meaningful.

The idea hit her while she was rummaging through her bag in the library: an anonymous get-well-soon basket. She could leave it outside his dorm, a collection of little comforts to ease the days leading up to his transformation. She’d make sure it was subtle, not too personal, just enough to lift his spirits without drawing attention.

Excitement and nerves mixed in her stomach as she mentally listed what she’d need. A couple potions to help with sleep, pain, and anxiety, some of Honeydukes' finest chocolate, a soft blanket to keep him warm, and a few baked goods from the kitchen elves. She might even add a small note with a simple message—“Hope these bring you a bit of comfort during the full moon. Take care of yourself.”

Over the next couple of days, Y/N carefully gathered everything. She bought him a midnight-blue wool blanket that felt like a hug in fabric form and a variety of different chocolates. She used her advanced potion skills to make Murtlap Essence, a Calming Draught, and a Healing Potion.

But the most important addition was a small bottle of Wolfsbane Potion. She’d somehow managed to get her hands on the recipe, even though it wasn’t officially taught at Hogwarts—and she’d acquired a secret stash of the rare ingredients needed to brew it, though she'd never admit where from. It had taken several nights of brewing in the abandoned classroom she’d found, but she’d done it.

The full moon was only two days away when she finished assembling the basket, carefully placing the note on top before leaving it right outside the boys' dormitory. With a final glance over her handiwork, she quickly walked back to her dorm, satisfied with her work.

As she returned to her room, a little thrill of satisfaction bubbled within her. Maybe, just maybe, her small gesture would help Remus feel a little less alone, a little less burdened by the full moon’s approach. And that thought alone was enough to fill her with quiet joy.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

Just a few floors below, the Marauders were still lounging in the Gryffindor common room, sprawled across chairs and couches as the fire crackled low. They’d spent hours discussing pranks, arguing about the latest Quidditch match, and bickering about everything from Potions homework to the best way to dodge Filch. When the last embers started to die, they finally decided it was time to call it a night.

As they made their way up the stairs, it was James who first spotted the basket. He froze mid-step, eyebrows raised as he pointed it out. "Er, lads... anyone know what this is?"

The other boys crowded around, peering down at the unexpected sight.

“No clue,” Peter murmured, squinting at the note resting on top.

Sirius, with his usual curiosity, leaned down and plucked up the note, inspecting it with a grin before his eyes gleamed mischievously. “Ooooooh, Remus, it’s for you!” he cooed, reading the note aloud for the group: ‘Hope these bring you a bit of comfort during the full moon. Take care of yourself.’

The boys’ faces all fell at once. Whoever had left this knew. Someone had figured it out. Their carefully crafted excuses, the timing of their sneaking around, all the little tricks they’d come up with—they thought it was foolproof. But apparently, someone had been watching more closely than they’d realized.

Without another word, they grabbed the basket, exchanging uneasy glances as they rushed into the dormitory, shutting the door firmly behind them. They gathered around Remus’s bed, where James set the basket down, and just stared at it.

“Well? Open it already!” James urged, his voice a mix of curiosity, excitement, and a tinge of concern.

Remus took a steadying breath. His friends were watching him closely as he slowly lifted the wrapping, half-expecting some kind of prank to burst out at him. But instead, he found an assortment of thoughtful items neatly arranged within the basket. A stack of Honeydukes chocolates, carefully tied together with string. A blanket, dark blue and soft, lay folded at the side. Several small bottles—potions, each labeled with precision, sat in the center, cushioned by tissue paper.

They all scanned the contents in awe and curiosity, but Sirius was the first to notice something unusual. He gasped, eyes widening as he pointed to one particular bottle.

“Holy shit, is that—”

“Wolfsbane,” Remus finished quietly, staring at the vial with a mixture of shock and disbelief.

They all fell silent, taking in the implications of that single bottle. Wolfsbane Potion was incredibly complex, nearly impossible for a student to brew, and yet here it was—crafted, sealed, and ready for him. Someone had not only figured out his secret but had gone to lengths far beyond casual concern. The potion’s presence in the basket hinted at more than just kindness; it was a deeply personal gesture, an unspoken understanding that spoke volumes.

Remus swallowed hard, his fingers brushing the cool glass of the bottle. "Did the card say who it was from?" he asked, looking over at Sirius, who shrugged and handed him the note again.

Remus read the short message over and over, searching for any hidden clues, some hint that might give away the sender. But the note was short, simple, and entirely anonymous. He turned it over, checked for invisible ink, even held it up to the light, but there was nothing.

“Not a single hint?” James murmured, peering over his shoulder, a frown deepening across his face. “Nothing?”

The group exchanged baffled glances. They examined the basket once more, handling each item carefully to make sure nothing seemed dangerous. The potions were labeled clearly and accurately, the chocolate smelled rich and sweet, and the blanket was incredibly soft—perfect for a night when he’d be feeling cold and drained. Every item seemed genuine, carefully chosen, with not a hint of a prank or hex.

As they finished examining the basket, they slowly started getting ready for bed. Remus sat quietly on his bed, his mind racing as he took in the kindness of it all. He tucked the potions into his bedside drawer, hiding the chocolate where he knew Sirius wouldn’t be able to steal it, and spread the blanket over his bed. It was soft, warmer than his own, and the weight of it settled over him like a quiet comfort he hadn’t realized he needed.

Sliding under the blanket, Remus felt a warmth blooming in his chest. Someone out there knew his secret, but instead of using it against him, they’d tried to make things a little easier. And he knew, without question, that he had to figure out who it was.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

The full moon had passed in a calm that Remus had never experienced before. He woke that morning still feeling sore, but the aches were manageable. Normally, the transformations left him scarred and hollow, as if all the energy and warmth had been drained from him, leaving only exhaustion in its wake. But this time, thanks to the Wolfsbane Potion and the potions from the basket, he felt… human. Less broken.

After seeing the other Marauders off to class, Remus leaned back into his bed, feeling the softness of the new blanket wrap around him like a gentle hug. He’d spent the morning drinking one of the calming potions, using the healing salve for his aches, and nibbling on a bit of chocolate to ease his nerves. And though he was grateful, he couldn’t shake the strange blend of curiosity and unease that swirled in his mind. Who knew? Who cared this much? The secrecy felt like a burden, yet he couldn’t help but feel a small glow of warmth every time he glanced at the basket.

Meanwhile, James, Sirius, and Peter were trying to answer that very question in their own way. During Potions, they’d had an idea. Whoever had brewed Wolfsbane Potion had to be incredibly skilled, so finding out who had the best marks in Potions could narrow things down. The second Slughorn dismissed them, they pounced.

Sirius leaned casually on Slughorn’s desk, grinning with exaggerated innocence. “Professor,” he began, “say I wanted to improve my Potions skills. Just hypothetically.”

Slughorn’s eyebrows lifted, clearly intrigued by Sirius’s unusual interest. “Oh? Well, it’s about time, Mr. Black. I’d say your marks could certainly use a bit of boosting.”

“Oh, I know, I know!” Sirius waved his hands, laughing a bit. “That’s exactly why I was thinking maybe a bit of tutoring could help. So… who would you say is the top student in your class?”

James sidled up next to him, nodding earnestly. “Yeah, Professor. Who’s the best at brewing?”

Slughorn looked delighted, his chest puffing with pride at the idea of his Gryffindor students taking a sudden interest in his class. He lowered his voice as though he were sharing a prized secret. “Ah, if you’re looking for someone with real talent, you’d want to speak with Y/N Y/L/N. A truly gifted student! Absolutely meticulous with her brewing, and a Gryffindor as well! You boys ought to know her.”

Sirius and James exchanged baffled glances. “Y/N Y/L/N?” James muttered, frowning in thought.

Peter piped up, looking a little surprised. “Oh, I remember her. We did a project together in second year. She’s very sweet. I suppose she’s easy to miss, always keeping to herself.”

“Right…” Sirius trailed off, scratching his chin. “Doesn’t sound like the type to be sneaking around in the dead of night to drop off mysterious gift baskets, does she?”

“People can surprise you,” Peter shrugged. “I bet she’s got her reasons.”

After classes were over, the three Marauders nearly sprinted back to the dormitory. They’d waited all day to tell Remus their findings, and as soon as they saw him, they launched right into it.

“So,” Sirius said, flopping dramatically onto Remus’s bed, “we might know who left the basket.”

Remus looked up, eyebrows raised, though he tried to appear casual. “Really?”

James nodded, practically bouncing with excitement. “Y/N Y/L/N. Slughorn says she’s his top student in Potions. And she’s a Gryffindor, so she’d know where to find us.”

The name caught Remus off guard. “Y/N Y/L/N?” He knew exactly who she was—quiet, always hanging at the edges of things, never drawing attention to herself. He remembered her from their earlier years, especially a few years back when she and Peter had done that project together. She’d been kind and incredibly smart, but she always seemed to fade into the background.

Sirius shot him a curious look. “Wait—do you actually know her?”

Remus hesitated, carefully picking his words. “I mean… I remember her. We’ve been in classes together since first year.”

But what he didn’t say was that he’d once felt drawn to her quiet kindness. She wasn’t like other students; there was a thoughtfulness to her, a gentle intelligence that had always intrigued him. He remembered her now, the shy girl who had somehow made him feel seen, and the idea that she might have left the basket stirred something inside him—a mix of hope and nerves.

Sirius smirked, leaning in conspiratorially. “Oh, you remember her, do you?”

Remus rolled his eyes, trying to hide his blush. “Look, it’s probably not her. There’s no way she’d still remember… I mean, we barely ever talked.”

James raised his eyebrows. “Barely ever talked? That doesn’t mean she wouldn’t care. Besides,” he added with a grin, “you clearly want it to be her.”

Remus glanced away, not trusting himself to deny it. Because if it really was Y/N… she’d have gone to extraordinary lengths just to help him. It would mean she knew his secret and, rather than fearing him, had quietly found a way to ease his burden. And perhaps the most surprising part? He found himself hoping it was her.

Finally, he cleared his throat. “Alright. I’ll talk to her. See if there’s anything to this theory of yours.”

The next morning, with a hint of apprehension and excitement, Remus set out to find her. He decided to look in the library first, where he thought she might be studying between classes. But as he crossed the common room, he spotted her in the far corner, curled up in a chair with a thick book on her lap.

He took a steadying breath and made his way over to her. She looked up, clearly surprised to see him, her eyes widening as he gave a small, nervous smile.

“Hi, Y/N,” he said, trying to keep his voice steady. “Do you mind if I join you?”

She blinked, a little flustered, but nodded, gesturing to the seat across from her. “Um, of course, Remus.”

They sat in a slightly awkward silence for a moment, and Remus could feel his heart beating hard in his chest. He cleared his throat, feeling the weight of her attention on him.

“So… I, uh, wanted to thank you,” he started, not sure how to bring it up. “For… everything.”

She stiffened slightly, her cheeks flushing, but kept her gaze steady. “I’m not sure what you mean,” she replied quietly.

He watched her, seeing the faintest hint of a smile playing at her lips, and knew then, without a doubt, that she was the one. “The gift basket. The potions. The blanket.” He lowered his voice. “The Wolfsbane. It helped me… more than I can say.”

Her face softened, and she nodded, understanding in her eyes. “I’m… really glad to hear that. I just wanted you to have what you needed. It’s not easy going through all that on your own.”

Remus felt his heart swell. Here she was, fully aware of the truth and yet sitting here, calm and kind, accepting him exactly as he was.

He met her gaze, feeling a sense of calm he hadn’t felt in ages. “Thank you, Y/N. I don’t know what I did to deserve that kind of kindness from you, but… it means a lot.”

They sat there in a comfortable silence, the unspoken words passing between them, understanding filling the space. He knew he’d found a friend in her—someone who saw through the mask he wore and had chosen to help, not out of pity, but because she understood what it meant to care quietly, deeply, and without expectation.

And perhaps, he thought with a hint of warmth, this was only the beginning of something much deeper.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

A/N ~ this is kinda rushed sorry, school is killing me :P

[y3sterdaysproblem]

they said speak now - m.s.

summary: you and matt had been best friends since the moment you were born, rarely doing anything without him by your side. your families have always expected the two of you to end up together, but when matt gets a girlfriend that hates you and desperately attempts to destroy your relationship, you’re forced to confront the truth about your feelings for him. will your bond survive the test, or will the pressure of love, jealousy, and change push you apart?

wc: 1.8k

series masterlist

Part three

You guys had a tradition.

Your entire lives, the four of you would sit on one side of the table, excitedly lined up with party hats or sashes on, grinning from ear to ear while everybody sang happy birthday, a cupcake lined up in front of all of you with a single candle in each one, a large cake patiently waiting in the center of the table. Your birthday was so close to the triplets’ that you’ve always just celebrated together, sharing the most exciting moments of the year together.

This year, on your eighteenth birthday, Matt was sat next to you like he always was, except today he had Amber perched sideways on his lap as everyone sang, her back towards you so you could barely even see his face. It was annoying, and as much as you tried to keep your spirits high, it was hard when you saw the way Matt encouraged her to help him blow out his candle, both of them grinning at each other like they were the only people in the room.

You had to get away from them, shoving your chair backwards and grabbing your cupcake, making sure you didn’t look mad enough to draw attention to yourself, but huffing loud enough for the couple next to you to hear.

The last month that Matt and Amber had been seeing each other was hard. Hard to swallow the large pill that was the reality of never getting a chance with Matt unless they had split up, and as much as you hated being around Amber, you could tell she was really pulling him out of his shell and making him happy, and you could never ruin Matt’s happiness for your selfish wants.

It hurt, though, seeing him happy with somebody else. You wanted to be in her position more than anything, sitting on his lap while everyone sang happy birthday to the four of you, giggling and whispering to each other like you were the only ones in the room.

The party was at your house this year, switching off between families every year, which made it easy for you to escape to your room with your cupcake in hand without people thinking too much of it. You locked the door behind yourself and climbed into bed, sitting cross legged as you peeled the paper off of the tiny cake, sighing softly to yourself. You couldn’t help but think of how different things already were and how much worse they’d get. How distant would Matt become before you couldn’t even consider him your best friend anymore?

A small noise startles you out of your thoughts, your head snapping up to look at your jiggling door. There was only one person who knew how to shake the door handle a certain way to get your lock to pop, so when you heard the small ‘click’ of it unlocking, your heart sped up at the idea of seeing him right now, all alone in your bedroom.

Matt pushes the door open and peers around it, seeing you sitting by yourself on your bed, friends and family abandoned in the kitchen. “What are you doing in here?” He asks, stepping inside the room and shutting the door behind him, clicking the lock into place once more. You shrug your shoulders quickly, watching as he walked closer to you until he climbed onto your bed next to you. “Are you alright?”

You look back down at your cupcake, leaning forward to set it on your bedside table to save it for later. “Yeah, I’m alright,” you tell him, turning back to face him. “Just needed a minute to myself.”

He nods as he listens, not fully believing you but having no reason not to. “Listen, I… I wanted to talk to you about something,” he starts nervously, bringing his hands together in his lap to twiddle his fingers. Your heart speeds up at his words, unable to push away the way you wanted so badly for him to tell you he loves you, he’s in love with you. You hoped so hard for the best birthday present in your life.

You nod your head, shooting him a comforting smile. He grins back at you and releases a shaky breath, nodding his head back. “Okay, um… I wanted to tell you first because obviously you mean a lot to me but… I’m going to ask Amber to be my girlfriend later, when we all go out.”

You didn’t know Matt even could break your heart more than he already had, assuming he’d crushed every part of it simply by spending time with this girl you hated so much, but this… this took the cake. Fucking cake. Fuck this birthday.

You’re silent for way longer than you should be, staring into Matt’s eyes as your mouth drops open, desperately trying to find the words to answer him. “No,” is the first thing you say, a choked sound that bubbles out of your throat.

Matt’s eyebrows furry together when he hears you, not understanding your reaction. “What?” He asks breathily, scooting a bit closer to you. “She… she makes me happy. Can’t you just try to like her?” He’s practically begging you, hands instinctively coming forward to grab yours and pull them into his own lap.

You shake your head immediately, staring down at your intertwined hands as your eyes well up with tears for what feels like the millionth time in the last month. “How am I supposed to see how happy she makes you when you can’t see how miserable she makes me? She’s always glaring at me and pulling you away from me and taking up all your time, and I can’t even tell you how sad that makes me because you just call me jealous and it hurts, Matt.”

You were jealous, he wasn’t wrong when he accused you of the emotion, but what hurt more was watching someone who felt like your other half get pulled away from you and not even do anything to stop it. Matt’s quiet as you speak, his thumb rubbing over your hand gently as he listens, trying to soak in your words fully before he answers you.

“She’s just spooked by you. Me having a girl best friend is weird to her, but we’ve talked about it and I told her she has nothing to worry about.” Matt’s words strike you like a bullet, an actual cramp forming in your stomach as you listen. Nothing to worry about. So he really didn’t have any feelings, then. “Can you blame her for being so cautious? I mean, look at you,” he tries to joke, cracking a small smile, but all you do is meet his eyes again with a blank expression on your face. Complimenting you after breaking your heart was a new low for him, regardless of if he knew it or not.

You pull your hands out of Matt’s lap and into your own, your skin feeling cold in his absence. “Do whatever you want, Matt,” you say flatly, knowing it was a toxic thing to say, but not having any other words for him in the moment. “I can’t stop you. But you don’t get to act surprised when years from now you look in the mirror and think, ‘damn, when was the last time we talked?’ or ‘why haven’t I seen her in six months?’ because the reason will be the girl that did everything she could to come between us.”

“That’s not going to happen,” Matt groans, rubbing his hands over his face frustratedly. “She’ll get used to you eventually and… maybe you’ll even get along! Come on, can you just… please give this a chance?”

You move your body up your bed until you’re laying on your back, head resting against your pillow and staring up at the ceiling. “Why do you keep asking me, anyway? What does it matter what I think? If she makes you happy then that’s what should be important to you.”

Matt sighs and shifts onto his side, facing you and looking at the side of your face, his expression soft and annoyingly loving. “Because what you think and how you feel means a lot to me. You mean a lot to me.” You turn your head to look at him, meeting his sweet eyes that stared back at you. His hand immediately reached up to push a few pieces of hair behind your ear, revealing more of your face to him. “I won’t let her come between us. Look, I’m here with you right now while you’re upset, doesn’t that count for anything?”

His touch is soft and familiar, something easy to fall into, regardless of how angry and jealous you felt. You wanted to roll over and bury yourself in his chest, wrap your arms around his waist and fall asleep pressed against him, listening to the sound of his heartbeat as your lullaby. You stayed put, keeping your eyes locked on his as he pulled his hand away from your face, resting it between your bodies.

“Yeah,” you start quietly, nodding slightly. “It counts for something.” You shoot him a small, half hearted smile, sighing quietly as you hope and pray your heartbeat isn’t audible to his ears, pounding away like it was in your own. You wanted nothing more than to tell him how you felt, beg him to be with you instead of the girl that made you feel like nothing, the girl that was stealing what felt like the biggest part of you.

You suck in a deep breath, trying to gain the courage to speak, to tell him your deepest, darkest secret, but the loud knock on your bedroom door startles you out of it. “Matt, are you in here?!” A voice calls, and you’re relieved to hear that it’s just Chris on the other side looking for his brother, but the moment is still ruined.

“Yeah!” Matt yells back, turning his head so he’s not screaming in your ear. He tells Chris he’ll be down in a few minutes before facing you again and offering a sheepish smile. “We should probably get back downstairs, huh?” He suggests, lips quirked up cutely. You nod in agreement and stare at him for a few beats before turning on your side and scooting closer, satisfying the urge to feel him against you.

You press your face into his chest and wrap your arms around his waist, squeezing your eyes shut as his arms immediately enveloped you back, holding you against him tightly. “You okay?” He asks, his face buried in your hair, inhaling the scent of your shampoo after he speaks. “Yes,” you say back, the sound muffled by his shirt. “Just getting in as much best friend time as I can before… fuck, I just love you so much, Matt.”

His arms squeeze you tighter and he lets his own eyes flutter closed as he held you, his thumbs gently rubbing circles against your back. “I love you, too,” Matt whispers back sweetly.

The love he offered you wasn’t the same, but it was enough.

taglist

@liiixsturniolos @madelinesturn @ifwdominicfike @sophand4n4 @chris-hallelujah @sophsturns @darksturnz @045696 @scorpioosworld @byhrxb @vickytaa @taelovesmattsturniolo @secret-sturniolo @theboredknightcat-blog @slvtf0rchr1s @gabri3la-sturns @delilahsturniolo @starstrucktyrantinfluencer @vanillsstuff @sturnlsstuff @imjusthereforthesturniolosmut @chrisbratt333 @mattsfavoritestar @dominicfikeenthusiast @certified-sturniolo @mattsside @sofiaaguilaxx @idrk2292 @dylansfavwife @sturnl0ve @sturnioloangelxoxo @sofia-is-a-sturniolo-triplet-fan @milasturniolo @mattsdillion @birkinbratsworld @aria003 @ariestrxsh @annsx03 @ouchywow @pasteldreams @pip4444chris @chriss-slut @yourebeautifulqueen @watercolorskyy @courta13 @craftycrafter26 @meg4-matt44 @colorthecosmos444

[a-hazbin-reader]

A Alastor x wife!reader where reader has been wanting a family and finally by some miracle she discovers she's pregnant

Just a thought 🫠

You are not even the third person to ask for this and we're all already delusional here soooooo-

Alastor X Reader Headcanons

✅️Romantic

❌️Platonic

TW: Sadness, Reader has baby fever and spreads it to her husband unintentionally, A little angst, Implied baby making 😉

Description: 👆⬆️

Alastor would do anything for his wife, spare no expense for her happiness and it shows

You two have talked previously about your obvious desire for a family with him

He would be willing to give that to you even though he's admittedly not the biggest fan of the idea

Part of him is scared of being a father but he won't ever admit that

You two both knew that sinners couldn't reproduce, and it crushed you that the opportunity was taken from you

You were still happy to have your husband and your found family at the hotel

You just still had that desire to have a baby, your husband's baby to be exact

Alastor hates seeing you so hurt over this, he wants to fix things for you, but this is out of his control

He couldn't give you a baby no matter how hard he tried, and that makes him feel helpless, which makes him angry

Sometimes the longing for a baby and the despair of knowing you can't have one gets to be too much for you and you unintentionally draw into yourself

Not amount of hugging or soothing words from your husband can console you, no matter how hard you cling to him and seek his comfort

You're just so sad sometimes

Which leads to Alastor being frosty and agitated with the others around the hotel, upset that he can't just fix it

He would give you the biggest family if he could, whatever he could do to make you feel whole

It's not like you two are neglecting each other or growing apart, there's just this heavy feeling hanging between you two

Everyone knows something is up with you two, but nobody is brave enough to ask, except maybe Vaggie, but she's respecting your privacy as a couple

Of course, it's Charlie who tries to get to the bottom of things for the two of you, everyone is just worried you two are fighting

So when you finally relent and tell her the truth, she's relieved that you and Alastor only want to have a baby-

YOU AND ALASTOR WANT TO HAVE A BABY!?

Sinners can't reproduce so you're just riding out your baby fever until it's manageable again

But no sinner has had a friend in the Morningstar family before

Not even a day later Alastor is greeted by Lucifer while you're out with Charlie and the others

"Hey man, heard you wanted me to get your wife pregnant! Lucky for you, I happen to have a thing for married women~"

When you come back home you're surprised to see Lucifer and your husband talking amicably, both turning their heads towards you immediately

"Ah! Would you look at the time? I should really get going, things to do, ducks to make-what?"

Lucifer gives you an unexpected side hug on his way out, hand resting momentarily on your stomach before leaving

You rub where he touched, surprised by the sudden warmth that lingers there

Your husband is looking at you strangely too but kisses you in greeting before you can even question it

Alastor acts rather clingy the rest of the day, following you around, asking you how you're feeling, giving affection more freely

You can't deny that you're loving the attention and soaking up every bit of it, the warmth in your stomach having spread throughout your entire body now

If Alastor's sudden neediness is anything to go by, he's feeling the same as you are

How either of you manage to wait until everyone has gone to bed to indulge in each other is beyond you

The entire night is a blur but when you wake up the entire bed has nearly been torn apart

Feathers are all over the place, the blankets have all been kicked away or shredded, the bed frame is clawed and cracked

You would almost feel embarrassed, but when you look at your handiwork on your husband, you can't help but feel proud

Things mostly go back to normal after that, except Lucifer visits more often and seems to pay special attention to you

You feel like everyone is watching you lately and you don't know why, you're never alone anymore, your husband especially is very hovery

But it ends up working out in your favor because one day you wake up, overwhelmed by the urge to vomit, your husband holding back your hair

And it keeps happening for days on end, and you start gaining weight without explanation, and your cravings are suddenly intense and-

Your husband is looking a little too pleased with himself, rubbing your back soothingly as you poke at your mysteriously changing body in the mirror

"You did this to me somehow, didn't you!"

"Why honey, why would I need to babytrap you when we're already married?"

"Because you-what?"

It takes a few moments to register what he said, all the strange things in the last few months clicking into place

"You got me pregnant..?"

He actually starts to look a little embarrassed, suddenly unsure if he really did the right thing after all-

When did he end up on the bed?

Is definitely sure in his decision later when he exits the bedroom, fixing his hair and clothes while he leaves you sleeping in bed

Luckily, the hotel has a lot of people who are willing to help out with your pregnancy because Alastor is worried he's actually in over his head

Your mood swings are more like mood hurricanes and sometimes he needs help knowing the right things to say

"Y/N, don't worry about not fitting into your own clothes, this is uh...just an opportunity to get new ones!"

"T-Thanks Vaggie..."

The cravings start to get fucking weird, Alastor genuinely repulsed by some of the things you're asking him for

"Darling, I can get you fresh meat as bloody as you want but do you really need to eat it with cake and ice cream?"

"Don't you love me..?"

He'll be back in 10 minutes

The bigger you get, the more sore and tired you are, constantly needing help around the hotel as you waddle around

"Thanks for helping me, Husk...I was getting really tired."

"Charlie, is it alright if I sit in that chair? My back is killing me.."

Alastor is scared with how vulnerable you are like this so he sticks close to you but silently appreciates the help from everyone

Even the other overlords come to see your miracle pregnancy, which doesn't help with Alastor's paranoia over how defenseless you are right now

They just want to see

As if Carmilla or Rosie would let anything happen to you anyways, Rosie loves the crap out of you and Carmilla wouldn't hurt an expecting mother

Rosie is constantly visiting and bringing baby gifts, so many that they're starting to pile up around the hotel

"Oh darling, you're practically glowing! Alastor! Have you told Y/N how radiant she is with her pregnancy?"

She wants to be Aunty Rosie so bad

Alastor genuinely admires the changes in your body, feeling pride in the thought that he did this to you

"With a little help from the big boss of-"

"You haven't left already?"

"I want to talk to my god child~ Can you stop hogging Y/N's belly for five minutes?"

"Your what now?

Alastor rubs your belly a lot, baffled by the idea that his spawn is in there and how happily you carry it

How you're so proud to be having his kid is beyond him, he knows what a wretched man he is and you still love him, take pride in him

The first time he feels the baby kick, he's a little unnerved but then you guide his hand back, smiling at him in a way that makes his heart ache for you

"Our baby wants to say hi to you..."

Okay, now his heart is melting, give your husband a kiss right now

Starts kissing and talking to your belly more after that, talking to the baby about anything and everything as if you're not even there

"Now your mother, you have no idea how lucky she is to have me as her husband~"

Confides in you late one night, about his fear of being a father and failing you and the baby

Not him having tears pinpricking in the corners of his eyes as you kiss him and reassure him

He doesn't particularly care about the gender of his child, just that you and the little spawn are okay

But if the baby is a girl, then he would like her to have his mother's name, that's all he would ask really

If the baby is a boy then he'll let you pick the name out as long as it's something fancy sounding

Does all the work when it comes to the nursery and baby proofing but has no idea what that actually entails, so you'll have to help him out

He's so proud to show you the finished look

The closer it gets to your due date, the more out of sorts and anxious he is but he tries to put on a brave face for you

He makes sure you never have to lift a finger, doing everything he can to make you comfortable and spending all his free time with you

Carmilla and her daughters all volunteer to assist in the labor, Zestial coming for the sake of tagging along

Alastor is in genuine anguish when you actually go into labor, the sound of you in pain and him being helpless to help is torture for him

Refuses to leave your side the entire time, blocking out everything else but you and encouraging you as best he can

Focuses so hard on taking care of you that he hardly notices that you've finished, surprised when Carmilla suddenly puts not one but two babies in your arms

You're visibly exhausted but seem to gain a renewed energy at the sight of your babies, looking at them in wonder before giving Alastor a tearful smile

"A boy and a girl, a miracle on top of already being miracle babies. Congratulations, Alastor."

Carmilla pats him on the shoulder before leaving, pulling Zestial and her daughters along with her

Alastor doesn't even register what she said, still dumbfounded at the sight of you cooing at two squirming infants

TWINS!? Lucifer, you sneaky son of a bi-

"Do you want to hold them, Alastor?"

"I would love nothing more, my dear..."

He definitely doesn't immediately fall in love when his babies cling to him like they'll never let go, holding his fingers in their unbelievably tiny hands

A LITTLE TREAT FOR ALL OF YOU WHO WERE BEGGING FOR THIS

[daenysx]

Gentle Sirius x virgin reader who’s never told anyone she hasn’t done it before and tells Sirius right when they’re about to do the deed and Sirius is really nice about it and helps her ease into it? (Also maybe a moment when she’s uncomfortable with the pain when he enters? I usually see fics like this written a bit unrealistically with no initial pain or discomfort and I’m like “how?!😭”)

thank you for requesting, i hope you enjoy ♡ requests are open!!

sirius black x fem!reader, nsfw

insatiable, little trouble

sirius loves the way you pull his hair.

your fingers are so gentle but also cruel, the feeling on his scalp makes his blood rush and he kisses you harder. you suck his bottom lip, his tongue brushes yours, and you pull yourself to lie back on bed.

sirius laughs at your poor attempts to catch your breath. "sorry, lovely. was it too much?"

you shake your head, smiling. "you're not really sorry."

"no, i'm not." he whispers on your cheek. "i love seeing you on my bed."

you clench your legs slightly, hearing sirius's voice so close to your ear does something to you. you press a kiss on his skin, his hair still between your fingers. he kisses your cheek and your jawline, he moves his lips on you until you get ticklish from the insistent kisses on your neck.

sirius is breathless this time. "yeah, maybe we should take a break, i'm not strong enough to continue." he laughs and stays still on you. he tries to make you smile, and you do, but it's a different smile than your usual ones.

"what?" he asks quietly. he brushes one last kiss on your cheekbone before he quirks an eyebrow at you. "tell me what you think, lovely."

your fingers are drawing circles on his neck, and you try to combine the words in your mind before you say them. it's so obvious in your actions, so clear that you want him. he'll make you say it though, you know that. sirius will always expect you to say what you want even though he understands, because he wants that comfort of words between you two.

"i was thinking- maybe we should continue, siri." you say.

"of course we can, baby." he says back. "what would you like to do?"

his voice is so gentle and sweet, you know he's not teasing. this is a first in your relationship and you feel ready enough to live this with him. he makes you feel brave, like you can get anything you want. he rubs your arm to make you focus on your thoughts, he's patient enough for both of you.

"do you want to have sex with me?" you ask, and it sounds ridiculous because he's literally hard against your leg right now.

"this is- no, i'm not kidding, the best question i've ever heard, and my answer is yes." he says, he is smiling. "but i want what you want. if you want, then yes. if you don't, then no."

"no, i just- i want you. i want to be closer, i want us to have this, but-"

"huh? what's the but, sweetheart?"

"i've never had sex before." you say, you know he will never ever tease you. "i guess i don't really know what to expect."

sirius kisses your upper lip. "it's okay not to know, we can discover what you like together."

"but i want to know what you like." you say, your eyes almost close with the contentment of sharing this with him.

"of course you can, we can just- learn it together, yeah? we've got lots of time, we don't have to rush."

"can we start now? it feels good, siri." you say, wrapping your legs around his waist.

"okay." he gets serious. "let's get rid of our clothes, and then i can get my pretty girl ready for me."

you are quick to take your shirt off, he helps you with your pants. he kisses your thighs and knees, throws his own shirt on the floor. he gets up for one moment to take his pants off, and then he's on your body, your naked skins touching each other.

sirius kisses your collarbones, your neck, and the soft curve of your breasts. you lift yourself to help him take your bra off. he seems happy to see you bare and you don't feel shy with him. he takes your nipple in his mouth and sucks it with closed eyes.

your fingers find their way back to his hair. he moves to your other nipple, kissing it first and then taking it in his hot mouth. you arch your back, he uses his other hand to squeeze your boob gently. he stands straight, fingers on your panties.

"can i take this off, lovely girl?" he asks, and you nod, lifting your hips to help him.

he kisses your belly and your panties join the other discarded clothes. his hands part your thighs, he brushes his lips on your cunt and you shiver. you squirm under his hands, and he looks at you. "oh, baby. i just gotta get you nice and wet for me, yeah?" he asks, and you nod. "can you tell me what you like?"

"maybe- maybe with your fingers- i can never reach too far myself but i like it when i'm touched a bit lower than that."

sirius nods, brings his fingers to your face to cup your cheek first. "you wanna get my fingers wet, darling? yeah? open your mouth for me."

you take two of his fingers in your mouth and suck slightly. he doesn't waste any time, but he tries anything to get you more in the mood. he presses a little on your tongue until he sees your throat clenching and then pulls his fingers back.

there's a wetness that started pooling down your cunt since his first kiss. he uses his fingers well, opens you up, and touches you softly. it's his middle finger first, just to make you get ready for the rest. he puts it inside slowly, you try to close your legs but he keeps them open with his other hand. he moves his finger a little, it's obvious on your face that you like what he's doing.

"another finger? i think we're doing a good job so far." he says, his voice slowly turns into his usual teasing.

he adds another finger and moves both of his fingers according to a pace that makes you stretch. the wetness is incredible, sirius touches the places you can never reach by yourself. you arch your back, the overwhelming hope of an orgasm makes you dizzy.

"you're doing so well for me, i knew you'd be my good girl." he says, following every reaction he can get from you.

you blush, smile with your eyes closed. your hips move involuntarily when he starts rubbing your swollen clit with his thumb. you aren't surprised how quickly he found it, it's begging for attention under his fingers.

"you like it so much, don't you, baby? soaking my fingers when i call you my good girl, pulling me inside like that." he says, the pressure on your clit increases. "you're gonna ruin me."

you moan his name loudly when he presses his fingers there, the soft spot you've only managed to find once, that makes your legs shake. "here? okay, baby." he keeps rubbing there with long fingers. "can you tell me when you're close?"

you nod, closing your eyes when it gets impossible to resist. you move your hips against his hand, he's playing with you and he's perfect at doing it. "siri, can i come? so close- if you keep doing that."

sirius listens, bites his lip as he focuses. "you can come, baby. whenever you want."

you nod again, holding onto his free hand, and waiting for the bubble to snap. you can actually feel your muscles relax, your brain closes off, every thought that keeps you awake disappears. you can see his tattooed fingers moving between your legs and that does it.

you think it maybe lasts for a few minutes to come down from your high. you know it's because how much you trust sirius and how comfortable he makes you feel that he managed to make you come. it's not only physical, it's more. you can feel he's rubbing your thigh, he's kissing your knees. he pulls his hand when he thinks you're ready.

when you open your eyes and look at him, he's already watching you. "that was- wow." you manage to say.

sirius is undeniably proud and happy. "i was thinking the same thing, my angel. would you like to do that on my cock?"

you nod, hungry for more. his dirty words can get you anywhere, you like it so much when they come out of his mouth and directed at you. he gets rid of his boxers, his cock twitches against his belly.

"can i touch you?" you ask, finally get back at the world and sitting on bed.

"sure, my love. do you want me to show you how?"

"yes, please."

"fuck, i'm afraid i'm gonna have to eat you up with how sweet you're being. give me your hand."

you smile, give him your hand, and let him bring it to his cock. he curves your fingers to wrap them around himself, he is thicker than you expected, and lovely, you think. he pushes his hips against your hand just like you were doing before and you can feel him throbbing under your fingers.

"you know, siri, i'd hate to be weird." you begin, try to tease him like he does you. "but i just wanna kiss it silly right now."

sirius throws his head back and laughs loudly. "no worries, that was my first thought when i saw your sweet cunt."

your smile never fades with him, you bring your thumb to the tip of his cock and he holds your hand. "okay, pretty, i think that's enough now."

"why?" you ask, a little sad.

"i wanna be inside your cunt when i come, and i won't last if you keep touching me like that."

"mm-hmm, okay." you say. "should i just lay back?"

"you can stay anyway you like. you can be on top if you'll feel more comfy."

"i'm not sure if my legs are strong enough."

sirius kisses the back of your hand, giving you a beautiful smile. "i can be on top of you. hold onto me and remember to talk to me all the time, yeah?"

you lay back, the pillow is soft under your head. "i'll remember."

"good girl." he says, holding your thighs and angling your body. "that's what you are, my love, you are being so good for me."

he moves on his knees and you shiver slightly when the tip of his cock touches your cunt. you are still wet from early, and stretched. "i just need you to relax." he says. "the more you're relaxed the easier we'll do it."

"i'm relaxed." you say. "promise, i'm ready."

he nods, moving a little more to get closer. he uses his fingers to lead himself inside, he pushes in slowly. you move unconsciously, you are wet but it's more than his fingers and it's unusual for you.

he pushes a little more and you make a sound. sirius is cautious, he pulls back immediately. "did i hurt you? are you okay?"

you try for a smile. "no, it's just- a little uncomfortable right now."

"do you want to continue? we can stop."

"no, i don't want to stop, please." you say. "i can take it, siri, i want you."

sirius rubs your thigh. "i think it's normal, feeling uncomfortable at first. we'll go really slow, baby."

"okay." you say. "can you kiss me?"

he leans in a little more, kissing your lips. you hold onto his shoulders and he deepens the kiss, his hand rubbing your thigh to help you relax. he tries to be inside you again, really slow and careful.

you draw little circles on his shoulders with the tip of your fingers, trying to distract yourself from sudden pain. it's not too much, but you think the feeling is still weird. sirius kisses your chin, his hips moving towards yours to let you have all of him.

"are you okay, lovely thing?" he murmurs. "you're doing perfect for me, taking all of it."

he moves himself with a different angle and your legs shake. "sirius." you whimper. "right there."

he hits the same spot again. "yeah? it should be better now, sweetheart."

you try to lift yourself against him, just to feel his cock pressing there again. "it's better." you say. "it's-oh, it's perfect, siri."

he starts moving according to a certain pace now, hitting your sweet spot. you are stretched around him, still wet and getting wetter, the weird feeling is still there but you can definitely ignore it thanks to the pleasure you get.

"gonna take care of you so well." sirius says, kissing your neck. "make you feel so good."

you are a mess under him, and you love it. "yes, yes, please." you whimper his name. "oh, sirius!"

"fuck." he says, moving a little bit faster. "gonna come for me, pretty girl? gonna make a mess for me? i can feel it- you're almost there."

you nod, taking all of him inside you. it's a good feeling, being this close to him. sirius fills your senses so well, you never want to leave him. this is gonna be a new addiction and you can't help but thinking all the new things you can try with him, the thought of giving him the same kind of pleasure he gives you now makes you arch your back.

"i'm- so close, siri." you say, breathless.

"me too, baby." he says, sucking a spot on your collarbone. "now, be a good girl and come around me."

you are shaking under him as he starts rubbing your clit. the orgasm takes you, it's intense and everything you ever wanted with sirius. he holds you, you close your eyes. he kisses your shoulder, your neck. he keeps moving slowly to help you ride out your orgasm and you pull his hair slightly as you come down from your high.

you hold onto his hair a little harder to get his face closer to yours, and you kiss the skin under his ear. "come inside me." you say. "please, i want it."

sirius obeys, and it only takes one last movement for him to lose himself. he puts his head on your chest as he comes, sucking your nipple unconciously. he whispers your name, and he's sure he almost drifts off. it's a strong urge but you keep him with you, you stroke his hair and wrap your arms around him.

after he calms down, sirius lifts himself on bed to look at you properly. you smile at him, he thinks you look gorgeous. "did you like it?" he asks, giving you a smile back.

"did i like it?" you quirk an eyebrow. "i thought it was obvious, siri."

"say it again for me, love." he can beg you.

"i loved it so much." you say, reaching his face to cup his cheek. "i want to do it again."

sirius laughs. "are you gonna be an insatiable, little trouble for me? is that it?"

"you just created a monster."

he kisses your hand. "oh, yeah. my little monster, i want you close to me all the fucking time."

he gets clingier after sex, you realize. he keeps touching you more than usual and checks on your body. "are you hurting anywhere?" he asks.

you shake your head. "no, it was unusual at first but- i really liked it. didn't hurt too much, i'll be fine."

he nods, leans in to give you a kiss.

"can we have shower?" you ask.

"nope, i'm gonna fill the tub for my baby." he replies. "we should make sure you're comfortable and not hurting, i don't wanna rush cleaning you up."

you kiss him thank you. he kisses you on your forehead after that, he knows you'll probably be sore later. still, he's gonna make sure you're fine, he loves taking care of you. you kiss him until he has to leave to fill the tub, and he carries you to the bathroom. the rest of the evening is spent with sirius spoiling you, never letting you leave the blankets on the couch and filling your stomach with hot chocolate.

[beneathashadytree]

RESPONSIBLE DADS - LOVE AND DEEPSPACE MEN X READER

Warnings : autistic!Zayne with his autistic daughter, all of them are girl dads here (except for Xavier who has twins), cuteness-aggression bites, one mention of a gun (no one is harmed!), no mentions of pregnancy (their kids can be interpreted as biological or adopted), this isn’t proof-read, reader is gender-neutral!

Genre : so much domestic fluff ☹️🫶🏽

Word count : 2.3K words (holy shit???)

Additional notes : This is a combination of two asks I’d received a month or two ago about the LNDS men as dads while their partner is away, and Zayne in particular struggling with his own autism vs his child’s autism. The brain rot was real in this one😭 To anyone else reading this, my requests are still closed!! These are just old requests I had in my inbox🫶🏽

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“She went down without much of a fuss,” Zayne said, slowly closing the bedroom door behind him as he set his phone on the dresser and got ready for bed over the video call, despite the time zone differences. He’d tried to convince them to just let themself rest instead of staying up past 3 AM, but they’d paid him no mind and insisted on seeing him last thing before bed.

They hummed, watching him slip out of his button up through their screen with a fond gaze. “She is really quiet compared to what I’ve heard about kids her age.”

In the midst of folding his shirt, he paused, a slight crease between his eyebrows. “A little too quiet.” At his concerned face, they straightened up in their seat and leaned in closer to their phone. “I think… she has difficulty connecting with me.”

Their expression was unsure at that. “I don’t know, Zayne. You know she loves you…”

“I do,” was his swift answer, pausing as he pulled his pyjama shirt over his head, then popping out with his hair adorably mussed. “But maybe she feels like I wouldn’t understand her.”

No matter how much he wanted to seem stoic and unaffected by the prospect, there was no hiding the conflicted emotions swimming in his eyes. With an almost sad smile, they asked him, “Even though anyone that sees you two says you have so much in common?”

With a slight flush (was it out of embarrassment as he noticed his messy hair, or was it a twinge of pride in being so connected to his daughter?) he began to apply his minimal skincare that he’d grown used to with them, scarred skin deftly being cared for after years of neglect.

“Autistic girls have different experiences than autistic boys, and their struggles are often overlooked because of these differences. Maybe she subconsciously feels that we can’t bridge that gap.”

Resting their head against their hand, keen eyes bore through him. Zayne would never go unheard as long as they were there. “Do you feel that gap?”

He shrugged, swallowing thickly as he wiped the excess off on his hand towel. “It’s not about me. Studies show that—”

Shaking their head, they sighed a little in affectionate exasperation. “It doesn’t matter what studies say. You’re overthinking it because you want things to be perfect. It’s sweet, just… not very realistic.”

“Mm. I know,” he softly conceded, combing through his hair with a distant glimmer in his eyes. It wasn’t so easy, navigating the emotions and ideas of a child that one already struggled with for decades.

They apologetically smiled at him, then added, “She trusts you with her life because she knows how hard you try to understand her, no matter how difficult that may be sometimes. You give her the space to be able to communicate her needs properly, and that’s why she loves you beyond measure, Zayne.”

He looked away for a few beats, but that was enough time for them to see the misty-eyed wonder in his eyes as he looked at the crooked drawing on his bedside table that she’d made of him holding her in his arms.

His sweet daughter who carried a piece of his heart everywhere she went.

“Then she’s just like you. Very open with her affections.” Huffing out an impossibly tender laugh, he picked up his phone once again and began to climb into bed, his shoulders sagging with relief; like he needed that reassurance to be able to nestle his body into the mattress, cold as it was without his lover. “Sometimes I wonder what I did to deserve it from you both…”

“You’re gonna get sick like that, and guess who’ll be cleaning up that mess?” Rafayel frowned, grabbing his daughter by the scruff of her neck and carrying her off before she got her pretty dress drenched by the wave that came crashing down where she’d been standing.

“I can’t get sick from water, daddy, and you know it,” came the reply between giggles, her eyes closed as she relished in the spray of seawater.

With a grunt, he fumbled with his phone a little as he switched to carrying her against his hip with one arm, before turning back to the ongoing video call. “Holding down the fort?” they teasingly asked, arching their brow at their daughter’s windswept hair and inevitably sandy fists curled up against Rafayel’s chest.

“She likes to bully me.” He pouted as he saw two pairs of mischievous eyes looking at him. “No guesses as to where she picked that up from.”

“Are you sure that your six year old daughter—who, mind you, is as cute as a button—is bullying you?”

“Daddy’s just silly, Lemurians are fine with water,” his daughter tried to reason with what she felt was perfectly logical. “He just doesn’t want to wash my clothes again if I get them wet.”

“And why should I?” he indignantly huffed out at the grin that showed she was definitely up to no good. “They’ll get dirty ten seconds later anyways. It’s such a pain.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t leave paint buckets everywhere, then I wouldn’t be on my fourth dress of the day.” Her sassy mutter under her breath was the last straw, and then his instincts took over and—

Chomp!

His teeth nibbled on her round little cheeks, cuteness aggression washing away any possible annoyance (which he’d been feigning, anyways) at the prospect of having to do the laundry all over again. She cried out in protest, though her shreaks of laughter and tighter hold on him gave away the fact that—not unlike his partner—she loved every bit of it.

“You got my face all dirty,” she whined, wiping her cheek against his silk shirt as he walked them back up to the house, much to his dismay.

A chuckle came from his screen, and he flushed under the sweet gaze and the grin he missed so much. “There goes another round in the washing machine. Y’know, Raf, it’s not the smartest move around to wear your favorite clothes around your kid.”

“No kidding,” he grumbled, though there was no bite behind his words. In fact, the tender look in his gem-like eyes only spoke volumes of the adoration he held inside. And maybe his little girl felt it, and decided it would be the perfect moment to press a kiss to where she could reach, right over his heart.

“I don’t mind the paint, daddy. You always make the prettiest things with it, pretty just like you,” she softly said, her tiny index finger toying with the pearlescent button on his blouse.

How much more did she want to squeeze his heart in his chest? He didn’t think he could possibly love her any more than he already did, and yet here she was, proving over and over again that she was the greatest gift he could ever be blessed with after all these years. Walking into their home with sandy feet and salty skin was no longer a dream, but a part of his quaint little life.

“Even if you did ruin my favorite dress and sandals.”

“Papa’s been asleep for three hours now,” she whined in a low voice, her bottom lip jutted out as she looked back at Xavier curled up in a ball in the middle of the unmade bed, legs tangled in the messy sheets. She then turned back to the videocall at hand. “Can’t you wake him up, please?”

Her twin brother popped up from behind her and patted her shoulders in what he hoped was a soothing manner. “He’s tired after he played with us. Let’s leave him for a bit.”

With a downcast gaze, she reluctantly nodded and walked out with him, the phone shaking as it was a little too big for her small hands.

Now out in the living room, they could finally raise their voices a little. “Papa cleaned up in the morning too. We probably shouldn’t have asked him to play with us.” He looked a little forlorn as he fiddled with his fingers. Painfully shy, it often showed when he was doubting himself. “We tried to help him after lunch, but—”

“That’s okay, what matters is that you both tried to lend him a hand,” they sweetly reassured them as they smiled through the screen. “And I’m sure if he was too tired to play with you guys, he wouldn’t have offered it in the first place.”

Their daughter gasped, eyes shining in awe at that. “How did you know that Papa was the one who came up with the game?”

“Because he waits for playtime every day, just to spend time with you guys. He’s always so excited, y’know?”

With matching grins (though one was more bashful than the other), the two seven year-olds looked significantly lighter than they had been when the call had first started. The precious moment was soon interrupted by a yawn from behind and a tuft of blonde hair taking up half the background.

“Did you two sneak off to have them all to yourself?” came Xavier’s sleep-addled voice, as he shuffled to pull them onto his lap and readjust the camera. “Cheeky, taking advantage of my nap.”

His daughter laughed, her hands going to loop around his neck. “We weren’t! Promise.”

Her brother reached up to pat down Xavier’s bedhead, gently combing through the soft locks. “You looked tired, Papa. We didn’t want to wake you up with our voices.”

At that, Xavier couldn’t help the upwards quirk of his lips, all the love one could contain threatening to burst through as he held his world between his fingertips—and the best part of him miles away but no further from the heart.

“You’re sweet, just like a certain someone we all miss,” he said, before kissing their foreheads and ruffling their hair, earning little grumbles of protest. Turning his attention back to the videocall, Xavier’s eyes softened. “How long until we can take naps together on the couch again?”

His partner sighed, glancing at the calender on the wall for a moment. “Should be three days. It’s hell without you guys. Maybe I’ve gotten used to waking you all up for an hour in the mornings.”

“Hey, it’s all because of Papa!”

“He does sleep in twice as long as us…”

“And it’s gotten even worse now that you’re gone.”

He chuckled at their sulking feeding off each other, and the collective agreement that things just weren’t the same when his lover wasn’t beside him where they belonged. “Then maybe this should be enough to convince them to hurry back to us so we can get up early every day, hmm?”

“Tell me why Luke and Kieran frantically called me up and told me stop you from endangering our one year old girl. Now.”

“Well, hello to you too, sweetie.” Sylus rolled his eyes at the clearly enthusiastic greeting. “I’ve missed you too. I’m doing good without you for two weeks. Thanks for asking.”

“Yeah, yeah, don’t give me that crap. You’ll live.” Scoffing, they crossed their arms in front of their chest. “Less avoiding the topic, more explaining why your seconds in command are treating you like a ticking bomb.”

“They’re more like lackeys, you know.” A hint of irritation climbed up his spine. Luke and Kieran were more like lost puppies that would be a danger to themselves—and society—if they were left to their whims. That’s all that they were (or so he tried to convince himself).

They waved him off, knowing that his half-assed words weren’t to be taken seriously. “I beg to differ. Now, where is she and what happened?”

Silence settled for a few moments, but then he realized it wasn’t in his favor to not quickly come clean. “She was playing around with me in bed, then seemed fascinated by my left pocket. Said pocket… may or may not have had a gun.”

Leaning in close to the camera, they sighed heavily, and pinched the bridge of their nose. “And I’m assuming her magic little fingers found the trigger.”

“More or less yes,” he mumbled under his breath, swallowing thickly as he met their dead-eyed stare. “Had to whip it out and fling it across the room… which may or may not have caused it to slam into the new bookcase and send it toppling.”

It didn’t matter how many people he’d managed to fearlessly face down; pinned underneath his partner’s disapproval, he found himself unable to move. “And that’s where they came in?”

Sylus hummed, flipping the camera and showing them the fractured remains on the floor. “Sorry about that, sweetie. Didn’t have the time to clean it up, what with feeding her and getting her ready for bed.”

“It’s fine, I can build another one.” Their quick dismissal was followed by the furrowing of their eyebrows. “What matters is that you prioritized her safety first.”

“Of course,” he was quick to reply, turning the camera back to himself, before he chuckled a little, sweetness seeping through his voice, “Though I do admit, seeing her have no self-preservation instincts really did make her strikingly similar to you in that regard.”

“Really flattering, hearing you praise her brashness and compare it to mine.” Their expression then grew more serious, and they worried their bottom lip between their teeth. “But… please. Don’t keep any weapons in the same room as her. She’s naturally curious.”

“Don’t have to tell me twice,” he murmured, having had his dose of sheer panic at her tiny hands. He couldn’t remember a moment in his life when he’d been as terrified as he was earlier, his blood turning to ice at the thought of endangering her because of his own fast-paced life.

“I know you’ll be more careful. You’re so good to her—and me,” they quietly mused, a grateful look on their face as they admired him—tired ruby eyes, unruly silver hair, and all.

And Sylus had no control over his own lovesick stare, perfectly content with dancing in their palm for the rest of their lives. After all, he’d found the only two people in this world he could forfeit his life for. There was no shame in admitting it—and so he did, ever so softly. “I suppose you can take pride in knowing that you both have me wrapped around your fingers.”

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[cacoetheswriting]

girl you have that really angsty Eddie fic where he gets hooked on things he shouldn't and it ruins his relationship with reader - please please please write some more Eddie angst, BEGGING

pairing: eddie munson x fem!reader [modern day au] word count: 5k

summary: a weekend gateway to with your old high school friends? sounds like a dream! only it’s not really as it’s been three years since you last saw them. three years since you left hawkins without so much as a goodbye, and certain people tend to hold grudges.

content warnings: heavily unedited (sorry): angsty angst, mature themes & adult language, mentions & descriptions of underage alcohol consumption / substance abuse, anxiety / panic attacks, emotional hurt / no comfort, unrequited (sorta) love, some mutual pining, love triangle?, eddie is a bit of an asshole, also touches on topics of: divorce, death, grief — pls let me know if i missed any!

Parking your car at the desired destination, you glance out the half-opened window and note how the weather is far from ideal for the planned activities. 

It’s cold. Cold enough to make anyone's atoms shiver. Dark grey clouds cover every inch of the sky above, hiding the beautiful autumn sun. The air is brisk. It’s harsh against your skin as you eventually get out of the red Jeep and the unwelcoming breeze that follows makes you wish that you had packed warmer clothes for this weekend.

Jesus, you think, as if this trip wasn’t going to be hard enough.

When your feet hit the gravel below, you exhale, wondering whether it’s too late to change your mind about agreeing to come. Since the weather was seemingly against you, what’s to say the universe wasn’t going to continue ruining this weekend? But before you get a chance to decide what your next move is going to be, the door of the lake house swings open and Nancy runs out, arms spread wide as she squeals with excitement.

“I can’t believe you actually came!”

The hug she gives you is strong, almost full force. It takes you a second to register that one second she was running out of the house, and the next, her arms are wrapped tightly around you as if no time has passed between now and when you last saw her. Therefore, it takes you a second to hug her back, but when you do, a small smile circles your lips. Familiarity. Maybe this trip won’t be so bad after all.

“Of course I came,” you say as she draws back, “You know me, Nance, always down for a good time.”

Nancy laughs. “Oh, I remember.”

Then her smile falters just as fast as it appears and you know exactly which memory crosses her mind because your own thoughts wander back to that moment too, along with the people involved.

“Sorry, my joke was in poor taste. If you can even call that a joke.” You admit with a lighthearted huff.

“No, no.” Nancy shakes her head, but even with the years that have passed since you last saw each other in person, you know the look in her eye is one of concern.

You think to try and ease at least some of her worry since she did go through all the trouble to organise this weekend for your high school group to get together and the last thing you’d want is for her to second-guess ever inviting you.

“I- uh… I actually don’t really drink anymore.”

Her facial expression shifts to one of surprise, though she doesn’t say anything which would demonstrate that. Instead, she smiles again.

“Good for you,” the tone of her voice conveys pride and you’re grateful.

“Thanks, Nance.”

One day you’ll tell her about the road that led you to sobriety, but today’s not that day.

Today is about reintroducing yourself to the friends that have helped you get through four hellish years that were called ‘high school’. The people that were there for you through the good and the ugly; which got real fucking ugly sometimes. The group that most often than not was your literal lifeline. 

Nancy, your best friend. Robin, your sidekick. Jonathan, your unlicensed therapist. Steve, your partner in crime. And Eddie…

You haven’t seen any of them since graduation.

Three years of virtually no contact.

Sure, it made you wonder why you were even invited to this weekend getaway in the first place, but Nancy was always like a sister so you knew her motives were definitely not malicious.

“Let me help you with your bags,” the brunette girl offers and before you get a chance to decline, say you’ve got them on your own since you really didn’t bring much with you, she’s at the boot of your car.

While Nancy fills you in on the plans she’s made for everyone, the various activities she’s organised for the days ahead, the two of you gather your belongings before making your way towards the big house. 

Apparently everyone is already here.

Nancy, Jonathan, and someone called Argyle (a new addition to the group, undoubtedly a breath of fresh air following your departure), got here last night. Steve, Robin, and Eddie arrived this morning.

“But the boys went to the shop to get all the groceries we need for this weekend, so right now it’s just me and Robin.” Nancy explains, fingers wrapping around the door handle. It’s her way of saying not to be nervous, he wasn’t here right now, and with that your shoulders relax in relief.

The inside of the house is even more impressive than its exterior. High ceilings, all wooden floors, and decor that undoubtedly cost more than anything you own or could actually afford. In the living area, there’s paintings on the walls that depict the home during construction, then in its full glory, as it stands now. Various knick-knacks fill the shelving, and the bookcase at the back of the room is filled top to bottom with stories you’ve never even heard of.

You allow yourself to continue into the kitchen, which looks like a piece out of Architectural Digest. Modern touches to the original design, upgraded appliances that look like they’ve never been used. There’s a large dining table in the back of the space, already set for dinner. The windows behind it offer a perfect view of the lake and as you look at the water; peace. For a split-second, you let yourself really think that coming wasn’t a bad idea after all.

“Jesus, Nance, how the hell did you find this place?” You ask in awe once the girl stands beside you.

“Argyle has this aunt who’s an avid Airbnb user. Honestly, when he first showed me the pictures, I thought he was out of it, like he usually is, but here we are...”

You don’t get to tell her how beautiful you think it is ‘cause there’s a high-pitch screech that startles you, and within seconds, someone’s arms wrap around your frame, swaying you from side to side.

“When Wheeler told me you agreed to come, I swear I thought she was bluffing!”

Robin drops her arms, allowing you to turn in your spot and face her. The grin on her face is wide, complimenting her new haircut, which is about the only thing that’s changed in her physical appearance over the last three years.

She playfully smacks your arm. You do the same to her. It’s reminiscent of a handshake, an acknowledgment that despite the years of only sending and receiving generic birthday texts, you guys were still as close as ever.

“Long time no see, Buckley. Loving the new look.” You point to her long bleached locks.

“Yeah? I was going for that badass lesbian vibe. What Daenerys should’ve been.”

You chuckle. “Well, I’d say mission accomplished.”

“Thanks,” Robin smirks then takes the duffle out of your grasp and turns to Nancy, asking to lead the way to the room that’s been assigned to you.

Up the stairs and down the long hallway, the girls point to the shared bathroom, but Nancy says your room actually has an en-suite. Then she outlines which door leads to whose bedroom — Eddie’s is first up the stairs and you wonder whose choice it was to deliberately keep you two away — before stopping at the last door and pushing it open to reveal your safe space for this weekend.

First thought that crosses your mind is how this one bedroom is bigger than your entire apartment. The bed alone would probably not fit in your current home. Second thought is how you have the same view as in the kitchen, only higher up, and you thank Nancy for assigning you this room for that reason alone.

“It’s no big deal,” she replies with a shrug, “You had the longest trip out here, only fair you get the best room, so you can properly rewind.” 

“As the organiser, you should have the nicest room,” you counter, but Nance just waves her hand, dismissing what was going to be an offer to swap.

She proceeds to place the bag she was holding at the foot of the bed.

“Get settled in and we’ll start on food once the guys return.”

“You should have enough time to shower, if you want,” Robin chimes in, also dropping the duffel she carried up for you, “Knowing the four of them, they’re still trying to locate the gluten free sticker on the pasta Nance asked for.”

“Rob,” Nancy snorts.

The blonde shrugs. “You know it’s true! Those idiots can’t fucking read.”

They leave you shortly after, telling you to take your time to clean up and change into something more comfortable. 

When the door shuts with a soft thud, you exhale a breath you didn’t even realise you were holding. It’s all okay, it’s all okay, it’s all okay, you repeat to yourself silently, and although you feel a little calmer than when you first arrived, there is still tension in your neck. There’s only one reason for that. One that isn’t here right now, but is bound to arrive at any point in the next hour.

‘arrived safe & sound. still feeling a little nauseous about this whole thing, but I’m taking your advice.. keep positive.’ - The text to your mom sends with a whooshing sound as you throw your phone on the large bed.

You glance around the room again, taking in the decor as a distraction to the anxiety bubbling in your chest. The furnishings are similar to the rest of the house, classy with a modern twist. Peaceful colours that perfectly compliment the wooden fixtures, and the birds chirping melodically outside the open window only add to the serenity. It’s really one of the nicest places you’ve ever stayed in and you take a mental note to send Nancy a bouquet of flowers when you get home, as a thank you.

When you step under the shower, you’re even more grateful. 

Back in your own apartment, you’re not guaranteed warm water, having to often make a choice between rinsing off the hectic day or cleaning the dishes so there’s something to eat off. It’s the life you chose, so you really can’t complain, but standing here in silence as the hot droplets wash over your skin, you think maybe you chose wrong. Then you think how fucking selfish that is of you since there’s a clear list of reasons why, aside from the comfort of a scolding shower, the choices you made three years ago where far from good.

Leaving without saying goodbye to everyone, for one. No explanations, no notes.

Only Nancy knew of your plan. After all, she was the one that talked you into leaving. 

The final nail in the coffin — so to speak — was her opinion on the literal shitshow that the final months of your high school career had become. And when she sat you down, the afternoon before graduation, she made it clear how she was worried about you and perhaps it was for the best to get away from Hawkins. Leave everything and everyone behind, allowing yourself time to heal and get your head straight.

You had only planned to be gone that one summer. But things never go to plan, especially for you.

Three months turned into four, then six, and before you knew it, a year had passed since your departure. Some of the group had tried to reach out at various points during that time, but you didn’t engage — only replied to Nancy the odd time, and texted Robin the mentioned before birthday wishes. 

The one person you really wished checked in on you, was the only person that didn’t. Not like you could blame him. You broke his fucking heart.

It wasn’t entirely a secret that Eddie Munson had a big fat crush on you.

He wouldn’t call it love at first sight, but it was pretty damn close — as you later found out from Robin. Later. Too late. She then went on to say, when the rocker first laid eyes on you, standing at Nancy’s locker and laughing at something she’d said moments prior, Eddie’s heart skipped a beat. Then two. The metalhead thought you were perhaps the most gorgeous girl to ever walk down the halls of Hawkins High, although he never said it out loud. 

(Not to you anyway.)

Things changed however, when you started dating Billy Hargrove. 

That boy was a bad influence for sure, even more than Eddie’s wild antics, but at that point in your life, you saw the world through rose-coloured glasses and turned a blind eye to Billy’s shitty behaviour.

Your first drink was provided to you by the scruffy blonde.

The first time you blacked out was after his funeral.

Earth shattering, his sudden death. Having lost the first love you’ve ever had, you didn’t know what to do with yourself. You didn’t know how to cope. By the time your senior year came around, and Eddie’s third attempt at graduation, your life only continued to spiral out of control.

Your parents announced their divorce. It was apparently no one’s fault — irreconcilable differences — but their break up meant the house you’d grown up in was being put up for sale and you suddenly had to choose who you wanted to live with. 

Being an only child never brought with it any pressures, until now. Your father was moving cross country. Relocating with his job, who no longer needed him at their Indianapolis location, preferred he run the new branch in Las Vegas. Your mother was also venturing outside Hawkins, just not as far. She apparently found this cute place in Fort Wayne and was already in talks with a local school there for a part-time teaching position.

The Wheelers took you in following a conversation between Karen and your mom about how you shouldn’t be finishing your high school education someplace new, so this solved one problem.

But being away from your support system unfortunately made you feel increasingly isolated. Your parents had this “open door” policy that you didn’t realise you needed until it was no longer readily available. Phone calls and texts just weren’t the same.

This time in your life proved how difficult it was to pretend you were genuinely happy.

Eddie was the first to notice the subtle change in your attitude. He’d often ask what was bothering you, but you’d always tell him nothing, so he eventually learned to stop and simply tried to distract you with his usual antics.

You hated him for it. You hated how he just knew how you were feeling. How he could sense those deep and inner thoughts you were trying to hide. And you hated now he would try to make you feel better when all you really wanted was for the sad feelings to swallow you whole.

Without proper supervision, your after school activities also shifted into ones that would fill the emptiness you were constantly feeling. You were always quite outgoing, always the first one to say yes when someone mentioned a party, but the months between December and April unlocked a new version of you. One not many people in your friend group were particularly a fan of, though all too afraid of saying something.

It all came crashing down the night of Chrissy Cunningham’s farewell party. A few days before graduation, she invited the entire senior year to her parents’ lavish home for a get together that her dickhead boyfriend called: Project X 2.0. 

You asked Steve to come with you — much to Eddie’s dismay.

In the end, Carver got his wish. The party was indeed memorable for all the wrong reasons and the endless list of mistakes you made that night, in your inebriated state, was precisely why you left Hawkins in a hurry.

Las Vegas turned out to not be so bad.

There were a few bumps in the road upon your first arrival. A few too many drunken nights, drunken fights, and drunken one night stands. But once your dad acknowledged your reckless behaviour was becoming a serious problem, things got a little easier. Therapy helped. 

A year and a half later, there was only one thing that made you want to reach for a drink to flush the hard work down the drain: Eddie Munson and how you treated him at that party, what you put him through that night.

In retrospect, you should’ve been the one to reach out to him. At least a call to say I’m sorry for the things I did and said. No time just felt like the right time and then, when Chrissy posted a picture of herself sitting happily in Eddie’s lap, it seemed a little too late.

Did it hurt to see him move on from the crush he had on you? Yes. 

Again, you couldn’t blame him for doing so.

-

“How was your shower?” Nancy asks when you come back downstairs.

She’s sitting on one of the sofas, a cotton blanket covering her legs. Robin is next to her, fingers working the keyboard of her phone, and looks up following Nancy’s question.

“No offence, but you look a lot better than when you first arrived.” 

The comment earns Buckley a good nudge to the rib cage by the brunette beside her. 

“Ow! Jesus Christ, Nance—”

“We talked about this,” Nancy interrupts, narrowing her eyes at the girl.

“It was a simple observation,” Robin defends, “I’m sure she’s fucking nervous to be here, rightfully so—”

“Robin!”

“It’s okay,” you chime in and the girls simultaneously turn to look at you once again. “Buckley’s right. I am nervous.”

Both their expressions simultaneously turn to one of sympathy. You plaster on the best smile you can muster before making yourself comfortable in an armchair by the open window, feeling their gaze follow your every move. You want to tell them to stop, tell them that the nerves will pass so it’s no big deal, but they’d see right through you. The topic of you, Eddie, and that horrendous high school party will haunt this group like a ghost, lingering in the background even if it’s addressed — which you’re going to have to do very soon. That’s why you came.

“He asks about you all the time,” Nancy says after a long pause, “What’s she doing? Is she working, studying?”

“Is she seeing anyone?” Robin adds.

“Is she happy…”

The ache in your chest increases with every spoken word, fueled by the guilt you carried every single day for the last three years. Somehow knowing now that Eddie asked about you was worse than thinking he’s moved on because, selfishly, if he was happy, then it wasn’t all bad. If he was happy, then the harsh truths you drunkenly sputtered in his direction weren’t a cruel thing to do, they weren’t as vile as you remembered them to be. If he was happy, then what you did after wasn’t a complete betrayal.

“I-I never meant to hurt him,” you finally whisper, forcing down the tears that threaten to break. “I never meant to hurt any of you.”

The girls both offer you a smile.

“We know,” Nancy reassures, “That’s why we thought it’d be a good idea to invite you this weekend. What happened three years ago is so minor in terms of the rest of our lives, it’s time we all move past it.”

Nancy, the peacemaker.

“Plus I’m planning a trip to Vegas for my birthday and I need your help with organising,” Robin chips in, her smile shifting into a grin. “You wouldn’t have answered my call, but now there’s no escape.”

Robin, the girl that can always get you to laugh.

The chuckle that escapes your lips is genuine. For a split second, your nerves are eased and you’re transported back to the basement of your childhood home where the three of you spent hours planning your futures while flicking through trashy magazines in accompaniment to old hits blaring through the docking station your dad’s iPod was connected to. 

Back then, turning twenty-one seemed like a distant dream. 

So you proceed to reassure the blonde you are going to get her name on the list of some of the best clubs Vegas has and she squeals, jumping up to squeeze you with excitement, and telling you how Vickie, her girlfriend, was going to lose her shit over this, then she disappears into the kitchen, presumably to call Vickie with the news.

“You just made her day,” Nancy says, smiling kindly.

“I’m glad I could do at least that,” you reply, then add, “I’m happy to be here. Thank you for thinking of me, Nance.”

Whatever Nancy is about to say next is interrupted by the sound of tires on gravel. The engine is shut shortly after your head snaps in the direction of the entryway, a large gulp forming in the back of your throat.

The next few minutes pass at an agonisingly slow pace. You think you hear Nancy call out your name, but your focus is on the door alone, waiting for it to open, waiting for him to come inside. You’re anticipating his reaction to seeing you after all this time, wondering if he’d even acknowledge your presence or skip straight to the kitchen with the acquired groceries.

From a recent post on Instagram, you know what he looks like. Really good, if anybody asked. You were careful not to like it despite your finger hovering over the image for a few seconds too long. Then you were careful not to like any other picture as you scrolled through his profile until you reached the very end: a post of the two of you at a Halloween party your junior year, the night you finally talked him into creating an account. 

Thanks to the light stalking, you also know him and Chrissy broke up a few weeks ago. He seemingly deleted any trace of the preppy blonde from his profile, she did the same with him, and you couldn’t deny the stinge of satisfaction that cursed through your veins upon that revelation.

When the doorknob rattles, you hop on your feet.

There’s no going back now. You prepared yourself for this moment ever since you accepted Nancy’s invitation. Time to face the music.

Jonathan walks in first. He greets Nancy with a kiss before offloading the twelve-pack of beers onto the floor and turning his attention to you. His smile is big and you’re feeling a little less nervous when he pulls you into a silent hug. When he pulls back, he pats you on the shoulder, then picks up the box he’s after placing on the floor and walks in the direction of the kitchen.

The guy that introduces himself as Argyle is next. Heavy lidded, he’s holding an open bag of Doritos and jokes about how he’d also give you a hug but he doesn’t trust himself with the orange residue on his fingers.

“White t-shirts are the devil, man,” he draws out the last syllable and flops onto the couch next to Nancy, offering her a corn triangle. When she politely declines, he just shrugs and throws it in the air, only to not catch it with his mouth, the piece falling onto the wooden floor.

With your gaze now focused on the chip, a single step away from you, Nancy scolds Argyle to not do that again. In the midst of this small ordeal, you don’t hear your name being said. Only when a white Nike sneaker appears in your field of vision, stepping on the Dorito and smashing it to pieces, you look up at the person addressing you.

Steve’s expression is full of emotion, but he doesn’t move from the spot he’s found himself in. He doesn’t attempt to hug you or reach out for you like the others did, only staring into your eyes as if he was mesmerised by the fact you were actually here.

“Shit– I mean…”

“Yeah…”

That’s all that you can say right now because it’s not yet the time to address what also went down between the two of you at the infamous party. Steve seems to be on the same page as you, opting instead to finally take that step forward and hesitantly wrap his strong arms around your frame.

The hug is awkward at first, but when you nuzzle your head into the crook of his neck as if no time has passed, exhaling softly when your hands make home on his back, the boy relaxes and his grip on you tightens ever so slightly. He whispers, “I missed you, sweetheart.”, into your ear and you instantly return the sentiment because it’s true, you missed him terribly. More than you cared to admit to yourself before this very moment.

For a few seconds, you forget where you are. Inhaling the scent of Steve’s aftershave and revelling in the way his arms perfectly folded around you, making you feel safe. For a few seconds, you feel at peace. For a few simple seconds, you forget about the person you’re still to see. The person that most likely wouldn’t be as open to seeing you again, especially now that you were in Steve’s arms.

The door shuts with a tame bang, a distinctive sound of runners tapping against the wooden floor, Nancy says your name as Robin calls out for Steve, you think you hear Argyle murmuring “Ohhh shit, dude”, then someone clears their throat and you finally open your eyes, which seemingly have closed moments prior.

Your throat dries.

There, leaning against the archway with his hands hidden in the pockets of his dark denim jeans is the boy who was once your friend, if not more.

Unlike Steve, Eddie stares at you with a blank look in his eyes, devoid of any real emotion. The emptiness behind the mahogany sends a shiver down your spine and you’re suddenly hyper aware of the position he has once again found you in.

Freeing yourself from Steve’s grasp, you hold your arms close to your chest for protection. He places a hand on your shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze, before motioning for Argyle to follow him out of the room, where Nancy and the rest of the group just disappeared — leaving you alone with Eddie.

Neither of you says anything for what feels like an eternity.

You’re afraid to blink, just in case he disappears during the brief second your eyes close. Truthfully, he has every right to do so. Rush upstairs and slam his bedroom door shut as you remain right where he left you, forever haunted by the choices you made three years ago.

No, no. 

There’s a reason you came and that’s to say you’re sorry.

Before you get a chance to break the silence, Eddie scoffs under his breath, dipping his head while running a hand through his brown locks. His hand remains at the back of his neck when he looks up at you again, a stupid smirk now plastered across his face.

“So, you and Harrington seem close as ever.”

Not the first words you expected to come out of his mouth, but given the situation he’s just encountered, they’re not surprising.

You nervously clear your throat, hugging yourself tighter.

“Uhm… No, we were just—”

“I don’t care,” he interrupts, his words cold yet the tone of his voice deceives him just a little. Also, if he actually didn’t care, then why make a sly comment in the first place?

But you don’t get to point that out, firstly ‘cause you’re still building up the courage to speak, and secondly because he’s quicker to continue with making his opinion known.

“Obviously you’ve always done whatever the fuck you wanted. Whoever you wanted.”

Ouch.

“Eddie, I-I…” you sigh quietly,  “We were just hugging. We haven’t seen each other in a while.”

Eddie scoffs. “Cute.”

“Don’t do that. Don’t be condescending.” You shake your head. “I didn’t come here to argue with you.”

“Then why did you come here?”

“‘Cause I missed all of you, plus Nancy invited me and I-I wanted to take this trip to apologise. Explain myself.”

Eddie rolls his eyes. 

“Well as far as I’m concerned, you can keep your apology,” he states sternly, standing up straight and taking a step in your direction. “Clearly the rest of them are right back to licking your ass, just like they did in high school. Entertaining your shitty behaviour, but I’m not interested.”

His words hurt. It feels like tiny nails are being hammered into your heart and you’re helpless to stop it.

“I don’t care for you and I don’t want to be around you. Since we’re stuck here, just refrain from jumping on Harrington at every chance you get. It’s fucking desperate behaviour.”

Tears burn down your cheeks slowly. They blur your vision and make you look like a giant fucking fool, even bigger than you already are. Eddie doesn’t owe you anything, you know that. Yet here you stand, silently crying over his animosity.

Nancy's words ring in your ears, “he asks about you, he asks if you’re happy.”. What a load of bullshit. He clearly doesn’t give a shit.

“I’ll make sure to stay out of your way then,” is all you manage to blurt out, wiping the wet droplets with the back of your hand.

Pushing past him, making a point to shove his shoulder with a little force, you hurry upstairs and into the confines of your bedroom. You make sure not to let the door shut with a bang, steering away from the dramatics Eddie undoubtedly wanted to provoke. Yes, he hurt your feelings, but you sure as hell weren’t going to let him ruin this weeknd for you and the rest of your mutual friends.

His reaction didn’t surprise you. In fact, you expected it. 

That doesn’t mean it’s any easier to digest.

Taking a few minutes to collect yourself, you check your phone and begin to open unseen notifications from various social media sites in an attempt to think about anything else than Eddie’s words.

“Deseperate fucking behaviour,” he’s said that to you before. The deja-vu hits harder than anticipated, making the nausea you thought you surpassed earlier spring right back up, stronger.

Yup. As you regain control of your breathing, you think for sure that coming here was definitely a mistake.

thank you for reading & please support your writers by reblogging <3

[theuntoldstorythatneedsawriter]

Too sweaty🌡🫂

Ona Batlle x reader

warning : fluffy 💭💗

(my first language isn't english nor spanish, sorry for any grammar or spelling mistakes)

Summary :

You refuse to hug your girlfriend after a match because she's too sweaty. With the help of her team, she will do everything and anything to get that hug.

The final whistle blew, the sound of roaring cheers erupted across the stadium as FC Barcelona Femení secured yet another victory. The players on the field embraced, exchanging high-fives and grins as the crowd celebrated their hard-earned win. You stood in the stands, clapping and cheering, Ona had been relentless on the pitch today, showing why she was one of the best defenders in the world.

Ona spotted you almost instantly. Her eyes lit up, and with that characteristic grin of hers, she jogged over, arms wide open for the post-game hug she always demanded. You smiled, knowing exactly what was coming next, but as she got closer, you could see just how sweaty she was. Her hair clung to her forehead, her jersey was soaked through, and her skin glistened with sweat. You loved her to pieces, but there was no denying that Ona in full post-match mode was a sweaty mess.

- ¡Cariño! (Love !)

Ona called out, still grinning as she reached the edge of the stands, arms stretched wide.

- Come here!

You took a step back, hands raised in defence, laughing nervously.

- Ona, you’re—

You gestured up and down at her completely drenched form.

- —you’re a little too sweaty for that.

Ona stopped, her grin turning into a dramatic pout as she dropped her arms.

- ¿En serio? After this great match ? You’re really not going to hug me ? (Oh really?)

You shook your head, laughing.

- I love you, but I draw the line at drenched hugs. You look like you just went swimming in your kit!

Ona groaned, shaking her head in exaggerated frustration, though her eyes were still sparkling with amusement.

- It’s just a little sweat, cariño. You’ve seen me worse. (love)

- Yeah, but I didn’t have to hug you then either.

You shot back, grinning. She rolled her eyes but didn’t let up.

- Fine. No hug for now

You smirked, leaning down a little closer.

- Once you’re clean, you can have all the hugs you want.

Ona stared at you for a moment, pretending to be annoyed, but then she leaned in suddenly and gave you a quick, mischievous kiss on the cheek, pressing her sweat-covered face against yours just enough to make you recoil slightly.

- Ew, Ona!

You exclaimed, wiping at your cheek with an exaggerated grimace, but your laughter betrayed you.

- That’s payback

Ona said with a wink before jogging back to her teammates, leaving you shaking your head and laughing as you watched her retreat.

The players had started celebrating in full force, and you could see Ona being pulled into hugs. Their joy was infectious. You sighed as you watched the love of your life soaking in the victory with her team. It didn’t take long for the other girls to notice the slight pout on your girlfriends face. Alexia, having seen the scene, sidled up to Ona, raising an eyebrow as she nudged her friend.

- Entonces, ¿no te da ningún abrazo tu novia después del partido? (So, no post-game hug from your girlfriend?)

Alexia teased, her voice loud enough for you to hear. Ona groaned, but a smile crept onto her face.

- No, al parecer sudaba demasiado. (Nope. Too sweaty, apparently.)

Alexia grinned, clearly finding it hilarious.

- No puedo culparla, honestamente. (Can’t blame her, honestly)

- Pero no me rendiré. (But I’m not giving up)

Ona said determinedly, casting a glance back at you, where you stood watching them from the sidelines, waving innocently. Alexia raised her eyebrows, a mischievous glint in her eye as she quickly whispered something to the other players. You couldn’t hear what she said, but a few of them turned to look at you with knowing grins.

Before you had a chance to react, the entire team started jogging in your direction, their expressions filled with a playful determination. Your eyes widened, and you instinctively took a step back.

- Oh no, no, no,

You muttered, shaking your head as they closed in. Ona was at the front of the pack, her grin widening as she saw your reaction.

- You shouldn’t have refused the hug, cariño.

She teased, her teammates fanning out behind her like a wall of sweaty determination.

- You’re all sweaty!

You protested, starting to back up further as the group approached.

- This isn’t fair !

Alexia, laughing, called out,

- We just want to help Ona get her hug !

Before you knew it, you were surrounded by the entire Barça squad, and any chance of escape vanished. In a whirlwind of laughter and playful jostling, they scooped you up, passing you straight into Ona’s waiting arms. Ona, grinning victoriously, pulled you into a tight hug, ignoring your protests as she pressed her sweaty body against yours. You squirmed, but it was no use. The team had made sure you weren’t going anywhere.

- Gotcha

Ona whispered, her face close to yours, her eyes full of affection despite the playful scene. You sighed in defeat, trying to suppress your laughter as you rested your head against her shoulder.

- Okay, okay. You win. But you’re still really sweaty.

- I’ll take it

She replied with a laugh, kissing your cheek again. The team cheered and clapped, clearly amused by the whole spectacle. You couldn’t help but laugh too, the warmth of the moment washing over you despite being covered in your girlfriend’s post-game sweat.

As the players finally dispersed and Ona loosened her grip on you, you looked up at her with a smirk.

- Next time, maybe I’ll bring a towel.

Ona grinned, her eyes twinkling.

- Or you could just hug me straight after every game, no matter what.

You pretended to think about it.

- Hmm... no promises.

She laughed, wrapping an arm around your waist as the two of you walked off together.

- You’ll come around eventually.

And as you walked side by side, with the stadium lights dimming and the echoes of the crowd still ringing in your ears, you knew that sweaty hugs or not, you wouldn’t trade these moments with her for anything in the world.

[illdowhatiwantthanks]

How about an Emily Prentiss x reader smut where she uses a strap on the reader for the first time

Hey, anon! So sorry it's taking me like a million years to get through these requests. But, as always, please keep them coming! – illdowhatiwantthanks

Control

Emily Prentiss x fem!reader Warnings: NSFW (18+ MDNI), smut, literally just unfettered smut, strap-on, mentions of AFAB genitalia, explicit language (let me know if I've missed anything!) Word count: 1.4k

Summary: It's your first time being strapped, and you're nervous as hell. Thankfully, Emily knows what she's doing. 😉

NOTE: This can be read as older Emily or younger Emily, whatever your preference. I just haven't had a chance to use a GIF of absolutely fucking FINE gray-haired Emily yet, so....

You eyed the strap suspiciously from your perch on the bed as Emily harnessed herself up. You exhaled shakily and thought to yourself, There’s no way that’s gonna fit inside me.

Emily gave you a small smile when she looked in your direction. “You alright?” she asked, her voice confident yet concerned.

You nodded, but your voice shook. “Yeah. I’m fine.”

Emily chuckled, crawling toward you on the bed and placing her hand on the side of your face before kissing you. You were breathless by the time she let you go, with a quick peck on the tip of your nose.

“You’re a bad liar,” she said, smirking and sitting back. “If you don’t want to do this, we don’t have to.”

You picked at your fingernails and avoided her eyes.

Emily nudged you with her shoulder. “I think you’ll like it though. But say the word and we’ll do something else. It’s not a big deal, okay?”

You furrowed your eyebrows, staring hard at the strap. “I mean, women enjoy this, right? Hypothetically?”

Emily shrugged. “I think it depends on the woman.”

“Have you done it before? R-received?” you asked, blushing a little.

“Yeah,” Emily told you, taking your hand in hers and running her finger along the lines of your palm. “With men, though. Never with a woman.”

“Why not?” you thought out loud.

Emily bit her lip. “When I started sleeping with women, I just… found a different role, sexually. One I liked better.”

“But did you like it when you did? Before?” You were far enough in now you might as well keep asking.

“I don’t know that my experiences with men are what you want to be comparing this to. At least, I certainly hope not.”

“But you think I’ll like it?” you asked, incredulous.

“Honey,” she said, grasping your chin to look you in the eyes. “We really don’t have to do this if you’re not ready.”

“No, no! I… I want to, I’m just… nervous,” you admitted.

“Look at me, baby,” she said, maneuvering your body gently down on the bed, running her thumbs gently over your cheekbones. “I might be the one with the strap, but you’re the one in control. Alright? You say the word, I’ll stop. I promise. We’ll go slow, okay? Slow and gentle.”

You nodded and let Emily kiss you again, harder, more frantic than before. You moaned into her as she caressed your body, as she placed open-mouthed kisses down your neck and across your collarbone.

You buried your hands in her hair, back arched, as she slowly swirled her tongue around your nipples, excruciatingly slow, until they were hardened into swollen peaks. You felt the cool line of her tongue draw a line from your rib cage down to your lower stomach, and you writhed as Emily placed ghostly, light kisses on your inner thighs and around your clit.

You could feel yourself glistening, feel the wetness between your legs. You were ready for more.

“Em, please,” you protested when she sat up. You opened your eyes to find Emily sitting back and applying lube to the strap, pupils absolutely blown, staring at you with equal parts love and hunger.

She wiped her hands off on the towel draped over the nightstand, then leaned forward, brushing your hair out of your face. “Are you ready?”

You nodded, gripping the bed sheets in both anxiety and anticipation.

Emily stared pointedly at you. “You’re sure?” You nodded again and she prompted. “Words, please.”

“Yes, Em,” you whispered breathlessly. “I’m ready for you.”

She blinked and shook her head, as if your words were a little too much for her.

“Tell me if I need to stop,” she said, maneuvering the strap so that it rubbed against your entrance.

You let out a strangled moan, somewhere between a scared yelp and a groan of pleasure, as Emily pressed into you, slowly filling you up.

You almost had a hard time catching your breath, as if all your body’s attention was now solely focused on this overwhelming, foreign thing inside of it. It wasn’t necessarily bad, just new, but your body did not seem to know what to do with it, and you could feel your insides pulsing with both pleasure and pain, trying to adjust to the new sensation.

When Emily had pressed most of the strap inside of you, she leaned down to caress your face, planting kisses on your forehead. “Good girl, honey. You’re doing so good for me. Are you okay?”

You nodded, face beet red from the pain and from holding your breath.

“Breathe for me, baby, alright?” Emily asked, slowly starting to rock her hips, moving the strap in and out. “Look at me, look at my face. Breathe. Like this.”

You followed the pattern of Emily’s breath to catch yours, and when you’d finally regulated your breathing, everything else seemed to fall into place too. You weren’t exactly in pain anymore as much as you were… full. But… in a good way? In a way that felt oddly wonderful? Maybe it was the physical sensation of the strap and maybe it was the knowledge that a part of Emily was inside of you that shot arousal straight from your head to your toes.

You whined a bit and moved your hips to meet Emily’s as a wave of pleasure rolled through you, intensified by whatever mysterious spot inside of you Emily had found and was now hitting relentlessly.

“Fuck, baby,” Emily breathed, and you could tell from her voice, from the flush of her chest, by the way her breath was frantic and caught every few minutes, that she was wildly turned on. And it was at that moment–staring up at Emily, seeing the sweat the beaded her forehead, the scrunch of her eyebrows in deep concentration, her hips against you in that way, particular to Emily, that always let you know she was trying hard and largely failing not to chase her orgasm–that you realized Emily was right.

It was you who had the power here. You who could make Emily fall apart, could drive her crazy. And you felt drunk all at once on power and pleasure–particularly the pleasure of seeing Emily losing her fucking mind on top of you.

With one hand, you pulled at her hips, encouraging her to go deeper, faster, harder. With the other, you cupped the back of her neck and drew her close to you, moaning in her ear.

“Holy shit,” she whispered, breath catching in her throat.

“Come on, Em,” you whispered. “You’re so close. Come on, baby, I want you to come inside me.”

The thrusting of her hips became sloppier and sloppier as she chased her high, her face pressed into your neck so that you could hear her huffs of breath, could smell her sweat as she worked for it.

Her noises became high and desperate and you felt your own orgasm close behind, knew it would come just from watching Emily fall apart, just from feeling her lose herself inside of you.

Emily’s breath hitched in her throat and you knew she was there. You pressed your own hips into hers, grinding into her, shoving the strap deeper as she jerked against you, until your own vision blurred and you wrapped yourself around Emily, riding out your high.

With a final shaky thrust into you, Emily collapsed against you, sweaty and spent. You grinned a her as she caught her breath, rolling to lay on your chest.

“Fuck,” she gasped, trying to get enough air. “You’re sure you haven’t done that before?”

You kissed her forehead and swiped a strand of hair off her sweaty forehead. “I only take strap for you, honey.”

Emily shuddered, then carefully slid out of you. “You,” she said, burying her tongue in your mouth as she removed the harness and threw it to the side of the room. “Are perfect.”

You kissed her back, surprised at how quickly arousal flooded back into your body.

“Hey,” you said, breathless, pulling your sticky bodies apart to look at her.

“What?”

“Next time,” you told her. “I want to ride you.”

Her eyes grew wide, and she nearly fell out of bed feeling for the harness again.

“How soon is next time?” she asked, glancing at you before strapping up.

“How soon can you get that on?” you grinned, sitting back to admire her.