#she is always on his mind and in his heart

[stylesispunk]

'Landed too hard'

outbreak!joel miller x f!reader

Summary: You save Joel's life from raiders but instead of thanking you, he gets mad at you.

or

You get hurt and you are forced to be vulnerable with each other.

wc: 7k

warnings: age gap, established relationship, angst, fluff, miscommunication, insecurities, mentions of blood, and fluff

a/n: i'm slowly coming back to this with this baby here that was on my drafts. Reblogs and comments are always appreciated 💌

The forest was too quiet for your liking. No birds, no wind—Just the soft crunch of the snowy ground beneath your feet as you followed Joel who was ahead of you and Ellie. There was something in the air this day, eerie silence pressing on your chest, tension, and Joel had been on edge all day, his broad shoulder seemed tense under his jacker, his grip on the rifle tighter than usual.

It felt like the premonition of something bad coming on your way. So, you kept your knife close and your gun pressed under your hand.

“We’ll set up camp soon,” Joel muttered, his voice low without looking behind to you and Ellie.

Ellie groaned. “Finally. My feet feel like they’re gonna fall soon.”

You gave her a tired smile at her remark, but your eyes stayed on Joel. His jaw was tight, the scar above his brow crinkling deeper. You knew him well enough to read the signs—he was worried. More than usual.

That’s why you didn’t even hear them coming.

One second, you were walking behind Joel, and the next, chaos broke out. Shouts echoed through the trees. Five, maybe six men, all armed came out from nowhere. Joel shoved you and Ellie behind an overturned log.

“Stay down,” he growled, pressing his rifle into your hands. “If anyone gets close, you shoot. Don’t move unless I say so.”

“Joel—”

“Stay.”

You swallowed your fear and nodded, grabbing Ellie and pulling her down. Joel stepped out, drawing their attention, firing a shot that took one of the men down, then another and so on.

But the rest came fast. Through the cracks in the log, you watched Joel fight. He moved like a man who’d done this too many times, but even then, it was too much. One of the raiders tackled him, and suddenly, Joel was on the ground, with one of those men’s hands wrapped around his throat, squeezing hard.

the man’s hands wrapped around his throat, squeezing hard.

“Shit,” you whispered, your heart pounding so hard you could barely hear Ellie’s panicked breathing next to you.

Joel clawed at the man’s wrists, his face turning red, veins bulging in his neck. He wasn’t going to get out of it and you couldn’t just sit there watching the man you loved die in front of you.

“Stay here,” you told Ellie, voice shaking from rage.

“Wait…what are you doing?!” she whispered.

Your body moved before your mind could argue. You were already running before Ellie could have the chance to stop you.

You tackled the man strangling Joel, knocking him off balance, but before you could finish him, another set of hands grabbed you from behind. You struggled, kicking and clawing, managing to land a sharp elbow into the man’s ribs before twisting free. The first man lunged again, but you dodged, feeling the burn of a knife slicing across your cheek. The pain barely registered as you drove your own blade into the man’s neck, then turned and plunged it into the second attacker’s chest before he could recover. Warm blood splattered your hands as the man crumpled, gasping his last breath.

You stood there, panting, adrenaline rushing through your veins.

Joel coughed violently, rolling onto his side, his face pale and drenched in sweat. You dropped to your knees beside him, your hands hovering uselessly. “Joel? Hey—hey, are you okay?”

He didn’t answer right away, still gasping for air. When he finally sat up, his brown eyes locked onto yours—not with gratitude, but with pure, burning rage.

“The fuck were you thinking?” he rasped, voice raw.

You blinked, the adrenaline still rushing through you. “I—I had to. He was going to—”

“You didn’t listen to me!” Joel slammed his fist into the dirt, his whole-body trembling with anger. “I told you to stay hidden! What if he’d killed you?!”

“Well, he didn’t” you stated, “I saved your life!”

“And you risked yours doing it!”

His voice echoed through the trees, sharp and unforgiving. You felt your chest tighten, heat rising in your throat.

“I’m not some helpless girl you can just shove behind a log, Joel! I did what I had to!”

Joel stood up, wiping the blood from his hands. His jaw clenched, but he didn’t say anything else. The space between you felt impossibly wide.

He ran a hand over his face, stepping back like he couldn’t even look at you. "You put yourself in danger. You could’ve been killed. Do you even get that?"

"I get that I just saved your ass!" You shot back, the weight of the moment crashing over you. "And all you can do is yell at me?"

He exhaled sharply, his hands curling into fists before he turned away. "I ain't doin' this."

"Fine," you bit out.

The air between you felt thick, suffocating. You glanced at Ellie, who stood off to the side, arms crossed, her expression tense.

You lifted a hand to your cheek, your fingers coming away sticky with blood. The cut burned now that the adrenaline was wearing off, and you sucked in a sharp breath. Ellie’s eyes flicked to the wound, concern flashing across her face, but she didn’t say anything. Joel still wasn’t looking at you, his back rigid as he adjusted his pack.

"We should get moving," he muttered, voice low and strained.

You nodded, swallowing down the ache in your throat. Without another word, the three of you fell into step, the silence stretching between you like an open wound

That night, you found a small clearing tucked between dense trees, far enough from the road to feel safe. The cold had settled deep, and you pulled your jacket tighter around yourself as you sat near the weak glow of the fire. Joel had barely spoken a word since the fight, his focus set on keeping watch, his back to you.

You weren’t hurt by his words or the outburst he had, but by the idea of him willingly die and feeling at peace with it. How easy would be for him to left you behind and in your own.

You dismissed your thoughts as you dug through your pack for a rag, pressing it against the wound on your cheek. The sting made you wince, and you cursed under your breath.

A quiet shuffling caught your attention, and you looked up to see Ellie kneeling beside you, her brows furrowed.

"Here," she said, pulling a small bottle of alcohol from her pocket. "Let me help."

You hesitated for a moment, then gave her a small nod. She dampened the cloth with the antiseptic and reached for your face. The touch was gentle, but the sting made you hiss.

"Sorry," Ellie murmured, concentrating as she cleaned the cut. "You’re lucky it’s not deeper."

You let out a small chuckle, though there wasn’t much humor in it. "Lucky isn’t exactly how I’d describe this day.”

Ellie huffed, finishing up before pulling a bandage from her pack. "Well, you’re not dead, so that counts for something."

You smiled faintly, glancing toward Joel. He still hadn’t turned around. You sighed, looking back at Ellie. "Thanks, kid."

She just shrugged, but there was warmth in her eyes. "Anytime."

As the fire crackled softly between you, you finally felt a small sense of comfort—at least, from Ellie. Joel, on the other hand, was still a storm brewing on the other side of camp.

Joel sat a few feet away, his gaze drifting to you as he kept watch. He noticed the way you shivered, your arms wrapped tightly around yourself, but still, you slept. He hesitated, jaw tightening as he debated with himself. Then, with a quiet sigh, he shrugged off his jacket and carefully draped it over you.

You stirred slightly at the added warmth, a small, unconscious sigh escaping your lips, but you didn’t wake. Joel lingered for a moment, watching you, before settling back down next to you as if he needed to remind himself you were still here.

The fire in your camp had burned down to glowing embers, the scent of smoke mixing with the cool morning air. Joel sat near it, his hands wrapped around his termo, sipping coffee our from it, his eyes occasionally flicking over to where you slept.

Your back was to him, your body curled slightly, the jacket pulled high over your shoulder. The cut ran along your cheekbone from the fight the day before—a fight that left you and Joel in a tense, suffocating silence. Reminding him how you always put yourself in danger for him.

He hated himself for it. How he had came to the point where he felt useless.

Now, in the morning light, you looked peaceful despite the frown that creased your forehead. Joel knew that look. He knew you too well.

Ellie stirred next to him, stretching before getting to her feet. She glanced at you, then back at Joel. “Should I wake her up?” she asked, rubbing her tired eyes.

Joel shook his head. “Not yet.”

Ellie raised a brow. “Why?”

Joel sighed, glancing at you again before taking another sip of coffee. “She’s got a frown.”

Ellie blinked. “Yeah, ‘cause she’s mad at you. Even in her sleep.”

Joel exhaled sharply through his nose, but there wasn’t much fight in it. “No. It’s different. She gets that when she gets a migraine.” He ran a hand over his beard, glancing at you again. “Let her sleep a little longer.”

Ellie’s teasing smirk faded slightly, replaced by something softer. “You really pay attention, huh?”

Joel didn’t answer right away. Instead, he took another slow sip of coffee, staring into the fire. “Yeah,” he admitted quietly. “When it comes to her of course I do.”

Ellie sighed, dropping back down onto the log next to him. “So… you gonna fix this or what?”

Joel tensed, setting his cup down beside him. “She doesn’t wanna talk to me.”

“Yeah, because you yelled at her.” She reminded him.

Joel rubbed a hand down his face. “She shouldn’t have done what she did.”

“She saved your ass, Joel.”

Joel’s jaw clenched. “That ain’t the point.”

Ellie scoffed, shaking her head. “Yeah, it kinda is. She did what you would’ve done for her.”

Joel was silent, his gaze dropping to the ground.

“Do you think she would be fine if you were dead?” she pressed on, sighing.

Instead of answer, Joel reached for his bag, unbuckling the strap. He knew exactly where to look, tucked inside one of the side pockets were the pills he always carried for you, just in case.

Ellie, who had been watching with quiet curiosity, tilted her head. “Wait… you carry her pills?”

Joel didn’t look up as he pulled out the small bottle, checking how many were left. “Yeah.” His voice was gruff, like he didn’t think it was something worth mentioning.

Ellie crossed her arms. “Huh.”

Joel finally glanced at her. “What?”

Ellie smirked. “Nothin’. Just—you act all tough, but you’re, like, secretly the softest person ever for her.”

Joel rolled his eyes, muttering, “Keep it to yourself, kid,” as he moved toward you.

You stirred slightly as he knelt beside you, brushing your hair back from your face with a careful hand. The sight of the cut on your cheek made his stomach twist again, but he pushed the feeling down. He had already failed to keep you from getting hurt once, he wouldn’t fail you now.

Gently, he set the bottle of pills down next to you, along with a canteen of water. He knew you still weren’t talking to him, but that didn’t mean he was going to stop taking care of you.

As he sat back, Ellie watched him with something unreadable in her expression. “Still mad, huh?”

Joel sighed, rubbing his thumb over the strap of your bag.

Ellie nodded. “Well… you’re doin’ the right thing, at least.”

Joel wasn’t sure about that. But as he sat there, keeping watch while you slept, he figured it was all he could do for now.

The first thing you noticed when you woke up was the dull ache in your head. The second was the soft sound of the fire crackling nearby. You blinked against the morning light, your body still heavy with exhaustion.

And then you saw the canteen and the small bottle of pills sitting beside you. You didn’t have to ask who put them there.

Your gaze flickered to Joel, who sat a few feet away, his back turned slightly toward you. He was sharpening his knife, the rhythmic scrape of metal against stone filling the quiet space. Ellie sat across from him, kicking at the dirt with her boot, sneaking glances at you like she was waiting to see what you’d do.

You swallowed, your throat dry. Carefully, you pushed yourself up, wincing as your muscles protested. Your fingers brushed against the bottle of pills, and you hesitated before finally picking it up.

Joel’s voice came before you could say anything. “Drink some water with that.”

It was quiet. Gruff. Like he wasn’t sure where the two of you stood after yesterday.

You pressed your lips together, debating whether to respond, but you didn’t have the energy to fight again. Instead, you obeyed, twisting the cap off and dry-swallowing the pill before chasing it with a sip of water.

Joel didn’t look at you, but you saw his shoulders drop just a little.

Ellie, of course, didn’t stay quiet for long. “Sooo… does this mean you guys are done being mad at each other?

You shot her a look. “Ellie.”

“What? I’m just saying’—”

Joel cut in; his voice flat. “Eat your breakfast.”

Ellie huffed but dropped it, tearing off a piece of jerky with her teeth.

You sighed, rubbing your temples before stealing a glance at Joel. His eyes were still fixed on his knife, but you could see the tension in his jaw, the way his fingers gripped the handle a little too tightly.

He was waiting. For you to say something. For you to forgive him.

You sighed, pressing your fingers against your temples in a weak attempt to ease the pressure in your skull. It wasn’t working. Nothing ever really worked, except for him.

Joel had a way of grounding you when the pain got bad. He didn’t always have the right words, but he never needed them. He had his own way of taking care of you, of letting you know he was there. And right now, all you wanted was for him to kiss your temples the way he used to.

The way he always did when you were hurting.

But things weren’t the same. You had fought, you had pulled away, and he had let you. And now, even though he was right there, he felt miles away.

You swallowed hard and shut your eyes, trying to push down the disappointment twisting in your chest. It was stupid to want that from him right now. After everything, you shouldn’t need him like that.

Except you did.

Joel shifted, and you felt him move closer, his presence clear even before he spoke. “Did you take the pills?”

You nodded. “Yeah.”

There was a long silence, and then, so softly you almost missed it— “Still hurts?”

You hesitated. Your pride screamed at you to say no. To brush him off and keep that last little bit of distance between you. But you were tired.

“Yeah,” you admitted.

Joel exhaled slowly. And then, finally, finally, you felt his fingers brush against your jaw, tilting your head just enough so he could lean in.

His lips pressed against your temple, warm and steady, lingering for just a second longer than they needed to.

You closed your eyes, breathing him in.

“Get ready, we have to go now” he spoke, still closer to your face.

You nodded, your throat tightening at the sudden shift back to reality. The moment was brief, fleeting, just like every soft thing between you and Joel seemed to be.

He pulled away first, his hand dropping from your face like he hadn’t just touched you like you meant something to him. Like he hadn’t just kissed you the way he always used to when you were hurting.

You cleared your throat, pushing yourself up slightly, ignoring the dull ache in your chest "Yeah, okay," you muttered, rubbing at your face as if you could wipe away the lingering warmth of his touch.

Joel stood up, already shifting back into that closed-off version of himself, the one that had been there ever since your fight. The one that didn’t know how to bridge the gap now.

Ellie walked in just as you were attempting to stand, her eyes flicking between the two of you. "You guys look weird," she said, frowning. "Like... extra weird."

Joel sighed, rubbing a hand over his face. "Not now, Ellie."

She just smirked, clearly entertained by whatever tension was hanging in the air. "Whatever you say, lovebirds."

You rolled your eyes, reaching for your bag to distract yourself. Your fingers trembled slightly as you adjusted the straps, but you pretended not to notice. Joel pretended too, but you could feel his gaze lingering on you, watching you too closely like he always did.

The road stretched ahead, cracked and broken, nature reclaiming what once belonged to people. You walked in silence, the weight of the morning still pressing against your chest. Your head ached, but you bit down on the pain, refusing to let it slow you down.

Joel was beside you, his steps steady, his presence solid as ever. But something about him felt distant. He was looking at you, you could feel his gaze flickering toward you every few moments, but it wasn’t the same. Not like before.

Before, his eyes had been filled with something warm, something certain. But now? Now, it felt like he was watching you from behind a wall, like he was making sure you were still there but refusing to let himself feel anything about it.

Ellie, for once, was quiet, kicking a stray rock as she walked ahead, letting the tension settle between the two of you.

Joel’s outburst had been raw, desperate, his voice breaking, his hands gripping yours like he could tether you to him. But now, you saw it for what it was. Fear. Not just of losing you. But of what it meant if he didn’t.

Because Joel didn’t think he deserved to have you. He thought he wasn’t enough, that he never had been. And maybe… maybe he never would be.

You swallowed hard, your fingers tightening around the strap of your bag. "You don’t have to keep looking at me like that," you muttered, not even turning your head.

Joel tensed beside you. "Like what?"

"Like you're waiting for me to cry to let you in and forgive you shout at me.”

His jaw ticked, and for a moment, you thought he wouldn’t say anything at all. But then—

"I am not," he said, voice rough. A lie.

You stopped walking. Finally, you turned to face him. "Then what is it?" you asked, your voice softer than you meant for it to be. "Because you had been like this for week, something's been different and yesterday you just broke."

Joel exhaled slowly, looking away, his hands on his hips, his fingers flexing. "Nothing’s different."

You huffed out a bitter laugh, shaking your head. "Bullshit."

Ellie stopped a few steps ahead, glancing between the two of you like she wanted to intervene but thought better of it.

Joel shifted uncomfortably, his shoulders stiff, his mouth opening—then closing again. He had no answer. No real one, anyway.

Because the truth was, it had never been about you. It had always been about him. About the way he would rather push you away than let himself believe, even for a second, that he was allowed to keep you. That you would want to stay.

That you would choose him. But you were tired of being the only one fighting for this.

So, you just nodded, setting your jaw. "Alright," you murmured, turning back toward the road, ignoring the way your chest ached. "If nothing’s different, then let’s just keep moving."

He Heard the way your voice broke at the end and he just watched as you joined Ellie.

Joel stood there, hands tightening into fists at his sides as he watched you walk away. He’d done this—again.

He had Hurt you.

He told himself it was for the best, that it was the only way to keep you safe. But that excuse was starting to sound as hollow as he felt.

Ellie shot him a glance, her expression unreadable before she turned her attention back to you. She said something low under her breath, nudging your shoulder. You didn’t look back.

And Joel? Joel just stood there, rooted in place, watching the one thing he was most afraid of slip through his fingers.

Because, deep down, he knew. It wasn’t the world that would take you from him. It was him. It was a matter of time.

A few hours later, when cold still found its way deep down your bones. You followed Joel and Ellie into the old market, the air inside thick with dust and the remnants of a world long gone. The faded signs above the shop windows once advertised fruits and vegetables, but now they were nothing more than silent witnesses to the decay around them.

Joel stepped into the shadows first, scanning the area with ease. His hand never strayed far from the rifle slung across his back. He wasn’t just looking for supplies—he was looking for danger, as always, he was ready to find it. You watched him move with that quiet confidence that made him seem invincible, even though you knew better. The way he held himself, as if the weight of the world was constantly on his shoulders.

He disappeared behind a corner, moving into the heart of the market.

Ellie, always ready for adventure, shifted impatiently next to you. “Think it’s safe?” she whispered, her voice barely audible in the stillness of the market.

You didn’t answer right away, your eyes fixed on the place where Joel had vanished. You could feel the tension coiling between the two of you, that invisible thread that had been growing tighter over the last few hours. But now wasn’t the time to dwell on it.

“He’ll let us know when it’s safe,” you said quietly, not taking your eyes away from him.

Ellie raised an eyebrow, clearly not fully convinced. “Yeah, but what if-”

You cut her off with a shake of your head. “He’s careful. He’ll check everything first.”

She didn’t seem entirely satisfied with the answer, but she stayed quiet. You both waited in silence, the only sounds the distant hum of the wind and the occasional creak of the building settling.

Then, Joel’s voice echoed from ahead. “Clear,” he called out as he reappeared from behind a row of shelves, his gaze briefly flicking over you before he turned to lead the way deeper into the market. His expression was unreadable, but you could sense the wariness beneath it.

His fingers found their way to your shoulders, his touch was brief, just the slightest brush of his fingers against your jacket. A silent reassurance. Or maybe a habit he couldn't break.

You didn’t react, didn’t turn to look at him. Instead, you focused on scanning the shelves, looking for anything useful. Cans, medical supplies.

Ellie was already rummaging through a shelf, muttering under her breath about how people really liked canned beans before the world went to hell. Joel moved ahead, his rifle held tight as he checked the corners, ever cautious.

You bent down, shifting through a pile of toppled boxes, when Joel’s voice came from behind you. “You good?”

It was automatic, the way he asked. Like even when he was keeping his distance, he still couldn’t help but care.

You hesitated, keeping your back to him. “Yeah.”

Another pause. Then a quiet, “Alright.”

But it wasn’t alright.

Not the way his voice sounded. Not the way your chest ached every time he was close but not close enough. And definitely not the way his fingers had lingered just a second too long on your shoulder, as if he didn’t want to let go.

Joel was already moving toward another section of the market, scanning the rows of empty shelves, searching for anything of value. Ellie had drifted further ahead, already rummaging through a crate she found. You stayed close to the wall, the building’s dilapidated structure making you nervous, but you tried not to let the unease show. You knew Joel was doing his best to keep everyone safe, but the weight of everything—of what you had lost, of what you were still fighting for—was starting to catch up with you.

You took a few more steps, carefully picking your way over the cracked floor, when suddenly, the ground beneath you gave way with a sharp, unsettling creak. Before you could react, your foot twisted, the bone snapping like a twig under the weight of the fall.

A sharp, searing pain shot through your ankle as you cried out, unable to stop yourself. The world spun for a moment as you collapsed, hands pressing to the ground to catch yourself, but the pain in your ankle was unbearable. You let out a sharp gasp, fighting the urge to cry out again as you felt something shift beneath the skin, your foot didn’t feel right.

"Shit," you muttered, trying to stay calm, but panic crept in with each breath. Your heart raced as you instinctively tried to pull yourself up, but your foot wouldn’t hold any weight. You couldn’t put it down.

Ellie’s voice broke through the fog of pain, distant but growing closer. “What happened?”

“Sweetheart?” Joel’s voice followed almost immediately. You could hear the panic lacing his tone, the urgency in his steps as he turned back toward you. You felt the weight of his presence before you saw him, his figure coming into view, moving fast.

He saw you on the ground, your face twisted in pain, and his heart dropped. "Damn it," he muttered under his breath, kneeling down beside you with a speed that surprised you. His hands were gentle, but you could hear the frustration in his voice as he assessed the damage. "What the hell happened?"

“I—I fell,” you stammered, gritting your teeth as you tried to hold back more of the pain. You couldn’t focus on anything other than your ankle, the way it throbbed, the way your body seemed to give way under the weight of it.

Joel’s face hardened, his jaw clenching as he reached down to carefully touch your injured ankle. “I’m gonna need you to stay still, alright?” His voice was calm, but there was a warning edge to it. He was trying to hold himself together, trying not to let his worry show, but you could see it in his eyes. His hands worked quickly, checking for anything more serious, his brow furrowed with concentration.

“Ellie, get over here,” Joel called out, his voice low and strained.

Ellie rushed back toward you, eyes wide with concern as she knelt beside you. “Shit, are you alright?”

“I’ll be fine,” you said through clenched teeth, trying to sound stronger than you felt. “It’s just my ankle.”

Joel’s gaze flicked between you and Ellie, his mind clearly racing. “We need to get you out of here, now.” His hand gripped your shoulder for a moment, his fingers digging into the fabric of your jacket as if grounding himself in that brief contact.

Ellie was already standing, her expression determined as she took a deep breath. “I’ll go grab what we need.”

Joel nodded, but his focus never left you. He reached down, his hands carefully lifting you as he positioned himself behind you. "I'm gonna carry you. It's gonna hurt a little, but I need you to hang on."

You bit back a hiss of pain as he adjusted his hold on you, making sure not to jostle your foot too much, but you couldn’t suppress the way your body tensed at the movement. The pain was still sharp, but there was something comforting in the way Joel’s arms secured around you.

“Joel…” you whispered, too exhausted to speak louder.

“I got you,” he muttered back, his voice almost a promise. "Just hang in there."

As he started to move, carrying you carefully toward a safer corner, you could feel your heart rate begin to slow, your pulse steadying slightly in the rhythm of his steps. But the ache in your ankle still lingered, a constant reminder of how fragile everything really was.

You closed your eyes for a moment, trying to block out the pain, trying to find some semblance of peace in the way Joel had his arms around you. Because no matter how mad you were, no matter how much you weren’t talking to him, Joel Miller was always going to take care of you.

Joel helped you settle into a quiet corner of the abandoned store, easing you down onto an old crate. He crouched in front of you, his hands steady as he pulled your boot off, careful not to jostle your ankle too much.

Ellie hovered for a second, glancing between the two of you, then rolled her eyes. “Alright, I’m gonna go check the other side of the store. Try not to kill each other while I’m gone.”

You didn’t respond. Joel didn’t either.

Once Ellie disappeared, Joel focused back on your ankle, pulling out a roll of bandages from his pack. He was quiet as he started wrapping, his fingers gentle but firm, pressing just enough to support your injury.

You watched him for a moment, then let out a quiet scoff. “You don’t have to pretend you care about this.”

Joel’s hands stilled. His jaw ticked. Slowly, his eyes lifted to meet yours.

“You think I’m pretending?” His voice was low, rough. Almost offended by the way your voice sounded saying those words.

You looked away, focusing on the peeling paint on the walls. “I don’t know what you’re doing, Joel. One second, you’re mad at me. The next, you’re acting like—like this.” You gestured vaguely at him. “Like it actually matters.”

Joel exhaled through his nose, sitting back on his heels. “It does matter.”

You let out a bitter laugh. “Does it? Because you sure as hell didn’t act like it when you were yelling at me.”

His hands curled into fists at his sides. “I was mad because you almost got yourself killed.”

“I was saving you.” You protested.

“I don’t need saving” He replied, rough as always.

Your eyes snapped back to his, anger flashing in them. “And I don’t need you acting like I don’t have a say in whether or not I protect you. You can’t just decide for me, Joel.”

Joel sighed, rubbing a hand down his face. He looked exhausted, like he was carrying too much weight on his shoulders. “You don’t get it,” he muttered. “I can’t—” He stopped himself, shaking his head.

You frowned, your voice softer now. “Can’t what?”

His gaze met yours again, something raw behind it. “I can’t lose you.”

The words hit you harder than you expected. For a moment, neither of you said anything. The only sound was the faint wind outside, the rustling of leaves.

You swallowed, your throat tight. “You think I want to lose you?”

Joel’s expression softened just a fraction. He sighed, reaching forward, his hand hesitating before resting gently on your knee.

Your breath caught. The fight, the tension, it was still there, but underneath it was something deeper. Something neither of you had the words for just yet.

“You are always so willing to die,” you sobbed, your voice breaking. “Like you’re just waiting for the exact moment. Like none of this matters to you. Like I don’t matter.”

Joel’s breath hitched. His grip on you tightened, grounding you, but he didn’t say anything.

You sniffed, shaking your head. “Do you even know what that does to me? How it makes me feel?”

He swallowed hard, his throat working around the words he wasn’t saying.

“You walk into danger like you’ve already made peace with dying,” you continued, your voice raw. “And maybe you have. Maybe you don’t care what happens to you, but I do, Joel. I care. And you make me watch you throw yourself into danger like it doesn’t matter if you make it out. Like you don’t care if I have to watch you—”

Your voice cut off as a sob wracked through you.

Joel let out a slow breath. Then, finally, he spoke. “I do care,” he said quietly. “More than you know.”

You let out a bitter laugh, swiping at your tears. “You sure don’t act like it.”

Joel’s jaw clenched. His gaze dropped for a moment before he forced himself to look at you. “I’m not waiting to die.”

You scoffed, looking away.

“I’m not” he insisted. His voice was rough, firm. “I just…I don’t know how to do this. How to—” He exhaled, rubbing a hand over his face before gripping the back of his neck. “I spent twenty years not giving a damn about whether I made it out of alive. And then you—” He stopped, shaking his head like he didn’t have the words.

You stared at him, waiting. His gaze met yours again, and for the first time in a long time, he looked vulnerable.

"Do you think I would survive without you?" You asked him.

"You're strong." he stated.  

"That doesn't matter if the person I love and I protect throws himself to death" you said, tired of the cycle.

“I’m not trying to--” he started, but you cut him off.

“Yes, you are,” you snapped, your voice trembling. “You act like you don’t care what happens to you, but I do, Joel. I do. And I don’t know what’s worse—watching you run into danger without thinking or knowing that if you died, you’d probably think I’d just move on.”

His brows furrowed. “That ain’t—”

You swallowed, your fingers tightening around Joel’s wrist. “Do you love me, Joel?”

He didn’t answer right away. His jaw tensed, his throat bobbing as he swallowed. For a moment, you thought he wouldn’t say it—that maybe, after everything, he’d still hold back.

But then, his hand moved, cupping your face gently, his thumb brushing over the cut on your cheek. His touch was careful, reverent, like he was memorizing you.

“I do,” he murmured, voice rough with emotion. “More than I know how to say.”

Your breath stilled.

Joel exhaled, shaking his head slightly. “More than I ever meant to. More than I know what to do with.”

Your heart ached at the honesty in his voice.

“Then stop trying to leave me behind,” you whispered, pleading to him.

He looked at you with such intensity, as if he was trying to see past the pain and fear, trying to understand something that had always eluded him.

“How do you even love someone like me?” Joel’s voice cracked slightly, the question laced with vulnerability, a side of him you rarely saw—something raw and unprotected.

Your heart hurt at the sound of it. You wanted to reach out and erase the doubt from his mind, to tell him that he didn’t have to question it. But instead, you just looked at him, letting the silence linger for a moment, trying to gather the right words to answer him.

“Joel,” you whispered, your voice soft but firm, “I love you because you’re you. Because through all the broken pieces, all the walls you’ve built around yourself, I still see the man who’s been there for me. You’re not perfect, none of us are. But you’re the one I want. You’re the one I need.”

He closed his eyes for a brief moment, as if taking in your words, processing them, before meeting your gaze again. His expression softened, the tightness in his jaw easing, but there was still that guarded look in his eyes. He was trying to fight something inside himself, something he had carried for so long.

“I don’t deserve you,” he said, almost to himself, but you heard it loud and clear. The doubt in his voice, something he couldn’t shake.

You reached up, cupping his face in your hands, forcing him to look at you, forcing him to see the truth in your eyes. “Stop saying that,” you said, your voice trembling with the weight of your emotions. “You deserve me. You deserve everything good that’s coming your way. I’ve seen who you are, Joel. You’re not what you think you are.”

“Why do you think I keep pushing you away?” he asked, his voice barely above a whisper now, like he was afraid of the answer himself.

You leaned in a little closer, your forehead nearly touching his, and your breath mingled in the quiet space between you. “Because you’re scared of letting yourself love me the way you do,” you said softly. “You’re scared of losing me. But pushing me away won’t make it any easier. It’ll just leave you with a regret you can’t undo.”

He inhaled sharply, his chest rising and falling as if your words had struck a chord in him, but it wasn’t enough to break him completely, not yet.

“I don’t want to lose you,” he murmured, his voice thick with emotion. “But I’m afraid if I let myself love you fully... if I let myself need you the way I do… I won’t be able to protect you. I can’t live with that.”

A single tear slipped down your cheek as you reached up to wipe it away, the tenderness in his voice catching you off guard. You could feel the pain in his words, the depth of his fear, and it only made you love him more.

Joel’s hand gently moved to your ankle, and despite everything that had just been said, the tenderness in his touch wasn’t lost on you. His rough fingers brushed against your skin as he carefully positioned your leg. You winced slightly at the discomfort, but it wasn’t the pain from your ankle that caught your attention—it was the way his eyes never left you, the quiet care he was showing in that moment.

“Hold still,” he murmured, his voice low, trying to keep his own emotions in check. You could tell he was trying to be calm for you, even though you knew he was anything but calm inside.

Joel’s fingers moved gently over your ankle, wrapping the bandage with the precision of someone who had done this a thousand times. His touch was steady, and for once, it was soft, more like the careful tenderness of someone who didn’t want to hurt you, rather than the harshness that often came with survival.

You winced slightly when the bandage tightened, but he immediately eased his grip, looking at you with concern.

“Sorry,” he muttered. “Didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“It’s fine,” you replied, your voice barely above a whisper. You weren’t sure why, but his care made you feel vulnerable in a way you weren’t used to.

Once your ankle was properly secured, Joel leaned back, looking at you for a moment, his eyes dark with something you couldn’t quite place in them. He didn’t speak for a while, just stared at you like he was trying to decide something in his mind.

Joel’s gaze went to your ankle for a moment, then, unexpectedly, he leaned forward, his lips brushing the soft skin of your bandaged ankle. It was a gesture so tender, so unexpected, that you couldn’t help but laugh softly.

“Don’t laugh,” he murmured, a small smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth, though his voice remained quiet, almost apologetic. “I’m just trying to make it better.”

You shook your head, still chuckling lightly, the sound feeling strange after everything that had happened. “I wasn’t laughing at you, Joel,” you said, meeting his eyes with a smile. “It’s just... never thought you’d be kissing my ankle better.”

Joel’s smirk softened into something more tender, and for a moment, there was nothing between you but the quiet understanding. His eyes dropped back to your ankle for a brief second before lifting to meet yours once more, his expression serious.  Without another word, he moved closer, his hand reaching to cup your face gently, his thumb brushing over your skin with the same tenderness he had shown when tending to your injury. You could feel the weight of his gaze on you, his lips just a breath away.

And then, without hesitation, he kissed you, soft, lingering, as if it was a promise, as if it was everything, he hadn’t been able to say before. You leaned into it, letting the kiss speak for you both, the tension between you finally easing, at least for this moment.

“Oh, come on! Seriously?” Ellie’s voice cut through the moment like a knife.

You and Joel broke apart instantly, your breath still tangled in his, as you turned to see Ellie standing in the doorway with her arms crossed, a smirk pulling at her lips.

Joel cleared his throat and sat back slightly, rubbing a hand over his beard like that would somehow erase what she’d just walked in on.

Ellie rolled her eyes. “I leave you two alone for five minutes, and you’re already making out. Unbelievable.”

Your face burned, but you couldn’t help but laugh at her dramatic tone. “Ellie—”

“No, no,” she interrupted, waving a hand. “I mean, it’s kinda sweet, but gross.”

Joel shot her a look, his voice flat. “Ellie.”

“What?” She shrugged, grinning. “Just saying. But, uh—maybe save the romance for later, lovebirds? We kinda got shit to do.”

Joel exhaled sharply, shaking his head, but when he glanced at you again, you caught the ghost of a smile on his lips.

“C’mon,” he muttered, standing up and offering you a hand. “We should get movin’.”

You took his hand, squeezing it briefly before letting go. As you stood, Ellie shot you both a smug look before turning on her heel.

As she walked away, you heard her mutter under her breath, “God, I hope I never have to see that again.”

As soon as you put weight on your injured ankle, a sharp pain shot up your leg, making you wince. You bit down on a curse, trying to tough it out, but Joel noticed immediately.

“Joel, it’s fine, I can walk,” you protested, but you could see the look in his eyes, the one that said, no argument.

“Not gonna argue with me on this one. Up you go.” Before you could protest, he crouched slightly in front of you. “Get on.” He waited for you to settle onto his back, and you reluctantly complied, knowing it would be easier than walking on your own.

You blinked at him. “Joel, I can—”

He shot you a look over his shoulder. “I'm not asking...”

Ellie snorted. “Just get on, lovebird.”

You sighed, but there was no real fight left in you. Carefully, you wrapped your arms around his shoulders as he hooked his arms under your legs and lifted you effortlessly.

“Easy, old man,” you teased, resting your chin on his shoulder.

Joel huffed, adjusting his grip. “Call me that again, and I’m dropping you.”

You laughed softly, “Thanks,” you muttered after a moment, your face buried in his jacket, still feeling the warmth of his body. The way he carried you felt like a sense of safety you hadn’t realized you needed until now.

You sighed against him, letting yourself relax just a little as Joel carried you forward with steady steps. Without thinking, you pressed a soft kiss to the side of his neck, just above the collar of his jacket.

Joel stiffened for half a second, his grip on your legs tightening before he exhaled slowly. “You trying to distract me?” His voice was lower now, rougher.

A smirk played on your lips. “Is it working?”

He huffed, shaking his head. “Maybe.”

You laughed, placing another kiss on the same spot, “I love you, Joel.”

His steps faltered for just a moment, barely noticeable, but you felt it. His grip on you tightened, his fingers pressing into your legs like he needed to ground himself.

He didn’t answer right away, just kept walking, his jaw tight. For a second, you thought maybe he wouldn’t say anything at all.

But then, in that quiet, gruff voice of his, he murmured, “I love you too, darling. Always”.

[2cupids]

warnings? stripper!reader, implied black!reader but everyone’s can read, riding, semi public sex, BIG DICK NANAMI, he gets one look at reader and is lowkey infatuated w her. mdni (17+)

length. 3.5k+ ….

salaryman!nanami considers himself a fairly straight edged person.. aside from the occasional drink.

he’s a man who goes by the books, always following things to a T and seeing them all the way through.

never has he been swayed by peer pressure or to follow a crowd, he’s always been independent-minded. so when a certain coworker of his, told him he needs to find a way to unwind and suggested he go to a strip club to relieve some of his stress, he found the idea revolting.

it was no secret that his coworker, satoru gojo, indulged in many of the taboo things in life and that was far from any lifestyle nanami would ever lead. normally, he would’ve never entertained such an idea, simply pushing it out of his head and going on with his uneventful day. though for whatever reason, gojo’s words replay in his mind like a broken record as the week drags on, and once friday night arrives, nanami finds himself parked outside a strip club towards the edge of town. one hand stays gripped around the steering wheel as his mind flashes what the possible implications of him coming here might give off to the other patrons, staff, and especially the girls.

he swallows thickly, unsure why he’s putting so much thought into this. it’s not like he has to stay if he doesn’t like it, right? but there’s a little part of him that wants to venture out of his comfort zone and see what draws in so many men to watch these girls dance. plus, he withdrew a generous amount of money out of his fat checking account just incase he does have a good time. with a shaky breath, he turns the ignition off and grabs his wallet, stepping out of the car and straightening his tie.

once inside the club, he takes a seat towards the back of the joint, far from the stage in hopes that’ll help calm his racing heart. the dark atmosphere of the club is illuminated with colorful lights that shine towards the stage onto the dancers and dimmed recessed lighting that’s scattered around the building. the sleek inside is a pleasant surprise to the seedy look that the outside holds. as the waitress circulates around the club to take orders, he orders a drink and tells himself to relax. by the time the waitress comes back with his drink, he tips her and takes a sip of his whiskey and settles back into his seat. as his mind quiets down and his heart rate slows, he catches the last few seconds of the current dancer’s set before she collects her money and walks off the stage. now it’s time for the next girl to step on stage and do her thing.

you.

the first thing nanami’s eyes land on the way the neon lights hit your pretty, brown skin as you strut onto stage. the skimpy lingerie outfit consisting of a bikini top and thong, is paired with an equally matching itty bitty skirt that leaves nothing to the imagination. nanami’s eyes are locked on you. he lets his gaze drift over your body briefly, but it doesn’t linger. the thought doesn’t even cross his mind of doing so, finding any ogling of the sort incredibly disrespectful.

music of your chance that you asked the dj to play, booms throughout the club as you work the pole skillfully. the way you move so elegantly, yet confident at the same time, fascinates him and it’s got him feeling like he could watch you dance forever.. literally. everytime you make eye contact with the patrons and your eyes wander towards the back of the club and meet his, his heart stutters in his chest. and maybe it’s just him, but he swears your eyes stay on him a few seconds longer than any of the other guys.

within minutes, he finds himself gravitating closer towards the stage and before he knows it, your set winding down after a four songs. he hurriedly pulls his wallet out and throws multiple ten and twenty dollar bills on stage, mentally sighing because he would like to see you again but he realizes he probably can’t. and that’s when gojo’s words pop into his head again. he could pay for a vip room.

nanami wonders if you’ll come out to the floor, so he can talk to you but as the minutes pass and you’re nowhere to be seen, nanami starts to lose hope. then he sees you walking towards the bar and he pushes his nerves aside and approaches you. “um.. excuse me, miss. do you offer vip rooms?” he asks, his voice carrying the slightest bit of hesitancy for such a usually self-assured man. it also doesn’t help that you’re even more stunning up close in person.

as you turn and face the potential customer, your expression changes into a more friendly, playful one at the idea of selling a room. “i do. how long are you interested in staying, babe?”

nanami’s heart flutters and he thinks for a moment. “oh, i guess thirty minutes sounds good.”

you hum and walk over to a table, ushering him to follow you. “thirty minutes is six hundred and champagne isn’t included in that. let me tell you everything a vip room with me includes. okay?” it would be rude to cut you off as you go over the perks of paying for a room with you, but he could really care less. the perks, the price, none of that matter to him. he just wants to see you again, just to simply be able to be in your presence is enough for him.

a bouncer leads him towards the vip rooms section and he can hear his heart pounding in his ears, nearly drowning out the music in the club. he steps inside the room and takes a seat, watching you step up on the stage. the sensual music you chose starts playing and you begin doing a mix of both floor work and pole work, unlike what you were doing minutes earlier out on the main stage. being close enough to observe you for a prolonged time now, not only are you beautiful, but he notices just how much the ginger color of your hair compliments your skin and the words slip out before he realizes. “that hair color is gorgeous on you.”

a knowing look appears in your eyes and you smirk, winking at him. “thank you, i know.”

it’s so embarrassing, but the action shoots straight down to his dick and his slacks tighten a just tiny bit. the way you maintain eye contact with him all throughout the first song is like you’re purposely teasing him, and he doesn’t know if he’ll last twenty-something minutes like this.

when the next song comes on, a more sultry one, that’s the signal it's time for a lap dance to match the vibe of the song. you stand up and look down at him from the stage, that lively expression from before is back on your face. “so what’s your name, handsome?” you descend down the steps and walk over to him, flipping your hair as you lean forward, holding onto his muscular thighs as you look him straight in the eye.

“n-nanami, miss.” he stutters, eyes glued to where your hands caress his strong thighs. he gulps as his eyes trail up the smooth skin of your arms and he succinctly eyes your tits in that silly little bikini top you’re wearing before his eyes land on your pretty face, hoping you didn’t notice.

you laugh and crack a smile, amused at his respectful tone. “miss? that’s a first. i’ve never heard anyone call me that here before.” nanami’s actually so surprised about that, but then again he remembers the culture here is indeed different.

wonderstruck is the only word to describe the way nanami feels as you dance for him. the confidence you exude pulling off such provocative moves is a turn-on he never knew he even had. your hands run along the sides of your body as you move and although he tries not to be impolite, he can’t help but let his eyes occasionally flicker over your body and linger on certain parts for longer than he’d like to admit.

it’s probably just him and his anxiousness, but he finds the silence awkward and uncomfortable despite the loud music playing. nanami clears his throat and speaks up. “may i ask your name as well?”

you take a seat on the edge of his lap and lean against him, reaching your arm back to hold his neck. “you can call me jasmine,” you whisper and somehow his body goes even more stiff underneath you. “and don’t forget you can touch me if you want, nanami.” you get up slowly from his lap, making sure to arch your back and you immediately move into the next move of shaking your ass as you’re bent over in front of him.

his eye twitches and a deep, throaty groan makes it way past his lips. fuck, why did you have to make things difficult for him?

lowering yourself to the ground, you kneel in front of him and your hands move up his thighs once again as they come in dangerously close proximity to his crotch as your fingertips graze his abdomen over his button up. with everything happening, on top of the eye contact, he could swear it’s like he’s having an out of body experience.

“what brought you here, nanami? i’m curious.” you question, a teasing undertone in your voice. “you don’t seem like the type to frequent strip clubs.”

nanami continues to sit there like a fool, simply staring at your beautiful face, trying to find the strength and willpower to form a coherent thought. he’s having so many firsts tonight and it’s overwhelming, but he can’t bring himself to leave or pull away. he won’t. “i, um.. a coworker suggested it. and i’ve been stressed from work, so i thought it might do me a little good to come here. take a load off.”

the wheels in your head start to turn and a thought suddenly comes to you as he reveals his motive. “you’ve been stressed, huh? what do ya do?”

“i work in stocks.. just making other people rich.” he sighs, a flash of emptiness crossing his eyes.

“oh really?” you stand up and throw one leg onto the couch, followed by the other one as you straddle him. you look in his eyes and wrap your arms around his neck. depending on his answer, this could be the last move for this lap dance before you move into some other routine else, or the dancing could end right here. “what would you say if i offered another way to help relieve your stress?”

nanami cocks an eyebrow, intrigued about what you could possibly be talking about. he thinks he has an faint inkling of what you could possibly be insinuating, but he doesn't want to jump to conclusions or get any wrong ideas. “what way are you talking about?”

actions speak louder than words. your hips move to grind slowly against his as you look at him without saying anything. nanami understands what you’re talking about and he responds in a low, quiet voice. “oh.”

“mhm. and that’ll add on another thirty minutes on to your time. and for this.. special service, it’ll bring the total cost to twenty five hundred dollars. what do you say?”

your thumb runs along his sharp jawline and your hand runs down his chest. he breath catches in his throat and he nods. “yeah.. yeah. i don’t care about the price, i’ll give you anything.”

you glanced at his fingers as you discussed what your vip room consists of out on the floor and you didn’t see a wedding band, and you still don’t see or feel one but it won’t hurt to ask. “you married or anything, nanami?”

“no, i’m single.” he’s still slightly dazed that he’s really going through with this.

“the ladies are missing out then,” a smirk graces your glossy lips as you move to unbuckle his pants and you take him in your hand, silently marveling at his size. “and i don't want you to get the wrong idea or anything.. i don’t do this. ever.”

he makes a small sound of acknowledgement, eyes going down to your long, acrylic nails adorning your fingers as your hand wraps around his dick, pumping him. he’s already half hard and you teasingly rub your finger across the tip, causing him to suck in a heavy breath. you’re about to ask him if he has protection when he places a hand on your back and moves to slide his wallet out of his pocket, opening it and taking out a condom.

oh yeah. he’s different just like you thought, you didn’t even need to ask him. you’re finding more reasons to like him.. platonically of course. at least for now.

you take the condom from his hand and notice the gold magnum wrapper has ‘xl’ on it and you find it amusing in a such attractive way. the condom is held in between your teeth as you keep stroking his length. your hand doesn't even fit half way around his girthy cock, he’s big. nanami sighs quietly, mumbling out a quiet curse underneath his breath.

you tear the shiny foil of the wrapper and roll the rubber down his cock, the material fitting him just like a glove. you place a hand on his shoulder and line him up with your entrance. the man’s large hands finally come up to touch you, carefully placing themselves on the sides of your hips and nanami’s deep brown eyes look up at you as his heart hammers in his chest. “jasmine,” nanami breathes deeply. “take your time, please. i– uh, i’ve been told before that it hurts..”

the concern he shows is incredibly sweet, especially for stranger and for the first time in a while, it makes you nervous, yet you don’t break character, no matter what.

you grin and give him a questionable look. “you think i can’t handle it? but thanks for the warning.” you slowly lower yourself down onto his thick penis and your eyes flutter shut, your eyebrows knitting together as you suck in a sharp breath from the stretch. nanami rubs at your hip gently, silently encouraging you and eventually you settle down into his lap after fitting all eight inches or however many inches inside you. your eyes gleam with a hint of mischievousness as you laugh, breaking the silence between the two of you, “fuck.”

nanami smiles for the first time tonight– actually for the first time in a while– his worn eyes crinkling slightly at the sides. “i know, but you’re doing great and damn.. i have to say that you feel wonderful around me.” he murmurs, his dark eyes still peering up at you as his voice drops towards the end of his statement.

you lift yourself off his cock and lower yourself back down, repeating the motion and letting your pussy get accommodated to being split open by something so big and thick. your other arm comes up to grip his shoulder and his hands tighten around your hips as you move against his lap, finding a good rhythm for yourself.

soft pants and whines slip out from your lips as you bounce in nanami’s lap, his dick fitting nice and snug between your walls with each drag of your hips. meanwhile, nanami is still stuck on how he’s got a literal goodness in his lap, riding him and making him feel good. he doesn’t feel worthy. truthfully, speaking his brain is on the verge of short circuiting right this very moment.

your movements come to a halt as you grind your clit against his pelvis and that propels his meaty length even deeper inside you and a breathy moan leaves your mouth. you whine your hips in a circle, keeping eye contact with him and nanami swears he could die peacefully at this very moment. then you resume your motions and he’s back on cloud nine.

quiet grunts and sounds of pleasure leave nanami, he’s never been a particularly loud lover. his hands roam up your curves and situate themselves on your waist, holding you tighter as he realizes he’s getting close. his head rests back against the couch as your warmth engulfs him and it gives him a mouth watering view of the point at which your bodies connect. he watches how your pussy streches to take in his girth. he believes you’re one of the most gorgeous women he’s ever laid eyes on, but the beauty of you on top him using his dick to please both of you is something else completely.

“uhhh��� ‘m getting– fucking close,” the words come out strained as he grits his teeth, the feeling of you squeezing around him having an unimaginable affect on him right now. “you close, sweetheart?” he grunts, eyes flickering up to your as he notes the pleasure etched into your pretty features as your soft bottom lip is tucked between your teeth.

when he sees you shake your head, he immediately moves into action. he’s not going to finish before he helps you get there. “i hope you don’t mind me touching you.” nanami eyes your face for any signs of opposition as his hand comes in contact with your clit, but there’s none. instead, your body twitches from the very welcomed touch and your lip falls from its place between your teeth, letting a plethora of moans come spilling out.

nanami bucks his hips up to meet yours and it’s got you reeling. his cock bumps against your g-spot so deliciously as you both your hips meet each other in the middle. nanami rubs at your clit faster and you’re starting to get close, tears well up in your eyes from the feeling. “oou fuck baby! right there, don’t stop!”

your pretty sounds are like music to his ears as he watches your body tremble from pleasure above him from your orgasm. your walls flutter around him and he’s close to losing it, too. his arms wrap securely around your waist as he takes the lead, holding your tired body close against his and pressing his face into your soft boobs as he fucks you, his thrusts turn more erratic as he approaches his orgasm.

condensation forms against your tits as he heaves and pants into your chest as he gets closer. one final thrust of his hips up into you and his body stills against yours, his dick pulsating and throbbing as he cums. you can feel the hot spurts of semen line the condom and it feels so warm inside you that it almost has you salivating.

“that was amazing.. thank you.” nanami whispers, and you hum softly.

the both of you stay like that for a moment. nanami’s strong arms holding you against him with his face still buried between your tits and your face nestled against the crook of his neck. once you hear nanami’s breathing steady, you kiss the side of his throat, letting your lips ghost up his skin until you’re next to his ear. “you’ll come back and see me... won’t you, nanami?”

a shiver goes down his spine and he nods, unwrapping his arms from around your form to let you go. his dick slips out of you as you proceed to lift yourself off his lap and stand up, curiously looking at him and awaiting his answer as you stand up and fix your thong and micro skirt.

“of course i will. i..i’d like to see you more. maybe get to know you a bit if that’s alright with you.”

after finishing up the vip room with nanami and cleaning up, you leave three thousand dollars richer that night– and that’s not even including the money you made from earlier in your shift– and with a new regular who doesn’t mind spending big money on you for your time. he’ll actually turns out to be the best regulars you’ll ever have.

nanami leaves feeling much more composed and relaxed then he can remember being in ages, and no, it’s not just from the fact he got laid. he’s left with something new to preoccupy his mind other than work and his handful of hobbies, too– you. maybe he’s got his hopes up and he’s being too optimistic, but either way it’s very uncharacteristic of nanami because he can’t stop thinking about how he wouldn’t mind if something more came from this.

oh, and most importantly, he has to thank that annoying co-worker of his, gojo, for pushing him to live a little more once they get back on monday.

cleo’s note. hope y’all enjoyed one of the rare times i wrote about protected sex lol. anyways happy bhm. this is dedicated to all my fellow blk baddies. ilyyy 🫶🏾

tags <3 @cheezemanz @tojicvmslut

[fireladyofink]

Oh God.. uuhhhh.. been a minute since I tried one of these..

Skipping 1, hate first person, just can't do it, not even read it.

2 is 100% Andlàtkyn. There's some issues here and there but it will always be my pride and joy.

Due to not posting on AO3 (even though I really should be), 3 is mostly ineffective. Except Wattpad has tags. I'd say UTAU, dragons and crossover.

4, lol. Literally. Lately I keep using that (only when texting others) and it's bothering me. I feel like a simpleton because of how much I'm saying that, eugh.

5 I've honestly learned a lot while researching fics. For one, I found out lantana berries are toxic to humans yet taste like blueberries, and I have them growing in my backyard. They're actually my favorite plant! I love their flowers; so pretty, and they have such a uniquely funky smell as well. Part of why I adore them, it stands out so much without being a bad smell. And the leaves have a sort of citrus smell? I love lantanas.

6 I don't know. I've thought about requests due to the money, but I feel like I'd either struggle to start writing it or get carried away with it- or straight up not finish in a reasonable timeframe. Commissions? Like art commissions? Maybe in a few years when I'm more confident in my skills and also somehow have a drawing tablet to properly draw digitally. Something like that.

7 Either or. I love making sickeningly sweet coffee or various different teas.

8 Is honestly hard to decide! Off the top of my head I can think of Dust initially meeting Killer with the hilariously absurd question of "What do you mean you don't have a mouth? How are you speaking right now? Your ass?"

9 Believe it or not it was basically when I first got a phone and commented a short story in the comments of a YouTube video. Someone replied with a suggestion of Wattpad. The rest is history, lol.

10 Off the top of my head I can't think of anything beyond something very specific for the fic I've been thinking about again lately, Ninjagaësia. Only time I've written outside of the UT fandom too, I specifically want to get around to writing that version of Zane more. What I had planned for him is fun as hell. An absolute badass.

11 Lots of comments, votes and people enjoying it. Which, continuing the above mention, Ninjagaësia doesn't qualify for. Pretty unsuccessful, but for once I don't really care.

12 Undertale AU's. I doubt I'll ever leave, either.

13 No. Hell, my ultimate fic of Andlàtkyn was written throughout the later half of highschool. I am technically working on an original story on the sidelines, I call it my worldbuilding project because I'm building up so much lore in this world before I actually touch on the story itself outside of a vague idea. About 60-ish different species of people, including the were-diseases. Last I counted, anyway. I'll be working on it for years, I know it, and I don't mind that either.

14 Comments talking about my fics on said fics. Actual interactions! It brings me joy. 🧡

15 My family is well aware. I don't bring up a lot of details but the last time I went into vague detail with my mother it was over a scene in Andlàtkyn (no direct spoilers) and she interpreted it weirdly and now she teases me by asking if I'm killing babies again! A bit awkward..

16 Actually finishing a damn story. I don't mind the periods of no writing until I get inspired again, but what annoys me is when I can't seem to finish anything. Only ever finished Andlàtkyn. I still have yet to write anything for the sequel to it, either! Zeradelsída is still just a bunch of loose plot points..

17 I am semi successfully writing benevolent eldritch horror. It doesn't intend harm, but it is truly.. horrifying nonetheless. The uncertainty of someone knowing he died, feeling his own heart stop beating, and feeling something OTHER seep inside and force it to start again, pulsing in his veins, fusing with his anatomy, permanently altering both him and itself into something completely unknowable.. I'm rambling. Anyone who hasn't seen my Wattpad, read Awakened. If you don't mind ridiculously long fics, read Andlàtkyn too!

18 I have at least 7 I mostly expect to finish, with at least 4 others just kind of.. there. I don't think I've posted any of those, either. I also have ideas inspired by dreams that I'd love to write down someday, though don't really expect to actually codify.

19 I kind of just don't. I work on different projects as the inspiration hits, take a backseat for a month or so, then come back to either the same project or a different one.

20 Hmmm.. Hard to think of something specific. I'm leaning towards stuff in Andlàtkyn. I don't really have a favorite kiss scene because I don't do romance. I write adventure! Andlàtkyn has some side romance though- not that any of it is my favorite. Platonic stuff, though.. I'd say my favorite is honestly Lust and Alter incidentally befriending each other and becoming venting buddies. It's the cutest thing, their friendship is adorable and wholesome despite the background angst. I didn't write nearly as much of them as deserved.

21 Honestly it's mostly lack of inspiration that I'm pretty sure stems from depression. If I could get an ADHD prescription or depression meds I'd probably be a lot better but like. I am completely broke. So much so that those issues aren't even in the top 10 of pressing problems solved with money.

22 Given I've literally only done it once.. not really. I guess I post it around everywhere I can think of in excitement?

23 That one continuous dream I had that went on over a month centered on a Nightmare that was freshly corrupted. He was honestly so nerdy and adorable despite putting on the brave and mildly "evil" front. The boy. Him. Goddamnit I want to write that at some point.

24 Honestly I can't think of anything for this one.

25 Oh yeah, I can't think of anything off the top of my head but there's a lot I'd like to fix in all of my stories, lol.

26 Kind of? It's a more recent development, did it for Zeradelsída which still has yet to be written, did it for that Ninjagaësia too. A little bit of a broad, even vaguer outline for things I want to happen in Awakened, too? More like events, no particular order or connection.

27 A few of those WIP's that haven't been posted... Okay technically just one. There's also the very first fic I wrote that is subsequently the only one I've ever deleted.

28 Angstiest often coincides with cursed for some reason, so I'll just go with the ending of Andlàtkyn for the Apple Twins.

29 I kind of just.. don't. If I do, I start hating everything, and because I'm not THAT bad at spelling and grammar I think it's mostly fine the way it is.

30 Oh absolutely. It's particularly obvious when one looks at Andlàtkyn, which I wrote over the course of 4 years. Really neat transition, if I ever manage to do it, I'd rewrite the beginning a little to match the rest when crossposting to AO3. If I ever get around to that.

31 Again, Andlàtkyn. That fic is my baby, man. It's so precious to me.

32 Honestly I don't know for this one, which is weird.

33 100% Ink of Awakened. My little boy. I have some friends that would rib the hell out of me if they ever found out, lol. Thankfully the main one doesn't even remember that he has a Tumblr.

34 I was not expecting how hard of a question this is! I thought it was Andlàtkyn, but thinking about it.. I don't think so? It might simply just change depending on which one I'm currently fixated on, but at the moment I think my favorites to get that on is Awakened and Ninjagaësia, second of which already has basically nothing to begin with.

35 I don't have anything, oof.

Fanfic/Author Ask Game

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[lov3yv4mps]

Hii!! Can you please do a period comfort with skz? Please and thank you!!!

Yes of course anon!!

‧ ୨ period comfort with skz ୧ ‧

SUMMARY: How stray kids members comfort you during your period

Pairings: stray kids x fem!reader (separately)

Warnings: just fluff!!

v4mps note: I tried to make these as accurate as possible, but this is my opinion! If it doesn't suit your opinion, I apologize :(

‧ ୨ bangchan ୧ ‧

This man is always prepared—like always. And when I say prepared, I mean he probably has a whole app on his phone just to track your cycle, complete with notifications so he knows exactly when to stock up on your favorite snacks, grab extra pads or tampons, and make sure the heating pad is ready to go. He loves seeing the happy smile when you notice his attention and care for you.

The second he notices it's that time of the month, he’s already one step ahead—texting you things like, “I got your favorite chocolate, baby. You want anything else?” Or maybe he just shows up with a little care package because he knows what you need before you even have to ask.

And when the cramps hit? Oh, he's on it. He’s tucking you into his arms, rubbing soothing circles on your stomach, whispering, “I got you, love. No stupid cramps are gonna hurt my baby.” If you need him to, he’ll even warm up your heating pad and hold it against your tummy himself—because no pain is touching his love on his watch.

If he finds you crying over the smallest things—like your eyeliner not matching or your hair not cooperating—Chan’s heart immediately softens. He kneels in front of you, gently wiping your tears with his thumbs. “Baby, don’t cry over this,” he whispers, pressing a kiss to your forehead. With a small smile, he tilts his head. “Want me to fix it, or should we just cuddle instead?”

-♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎-

‧ ୨ leeknow ୧ ‧

Lee Know notices before you even say anything. The slight wince, the way you press a hand to your stomach—he’s already on it. Without a word, he disappears and comes back with your heating pad, plugging it in and placing it on your lap. “You should’ve said something,” he mutters, but his touch is gentle as he tucks a blanket around you. He won’t make a big deal out of it, but he’ll make sure you have everything you need.

He acts nonchalant about it, but you know he’s paying attention. If you complain about cramps, he’ll scoff lightly. “Well, I can’t do anything about that.” But five minutes later, he’s sliding a cup of warm tea in front of you, pretending it’s no big deal. If you thank him, he just shrugs. “I just didn’t want to hear you complain later.” (But the way he subtly checks on you every few minutes totally gives him away.)

If he sees you getting emotional, he’s quick to shift your focus. He’ll plop down next to you, phone in hand, and start showing you cute cat videos like it’s urgent. “Look at this one. This is literally you.” If that doesn’t work, he’ll poke your cheek until you glare at him. “There she is. Thought I lost you for a second.” Anything to keep your mind off the discomfort.

Lee Know isn’t always the biggest on PDA, but when you’re in pain? He’s all yours. He lets you stretch out on the couch, head resting on his lap as he absentmindedly strokes your hair. “Just sleep,” he murmurs, his fingers moving soothingly against your scalp. He won’t say it outright, but the way he lets you cling to him, the way he adjusts so you’re comfortable? Yeah, he’s not letting you go until you feel better.

-♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎-

‧ ୨ changbin ୧ ‧

The moment Changbin hears you groan in pain, he’s on high alert. He rushes to your side, eyes full of concern. “Where does it hurt? What do you need? Say the word, and I got you.” He won’t rest until he’s sure you’re comfortable, tucking a blanket around you and making sure you have everything—snacks, water, even his hoodie if you want it.

If you’re feeling sluggish and mopey, he’s not letting you sink into the sadness. “C’mon, let’s go for a short walk, just to get some air.” If you refuse, he flops onto the couch next to you dramatically. “Fine, but at least let’s stretch a little.” He just wants to help you feel better, even if it means sitting there massaging your legs while making goofy faces.

He hates seeing you uncomfortable, so he’ll do anything to take your mind off the pain. He’ll put on a funny movie, tell you random stories, or even offer to do your skincare routine for you. “I’ve seen you do it a million times. How hard can it be?” (Spoiler: He gets way too into it, and you end up laughing at his concentrated expression.)

The second you lay down, Changbin immediately becomes your human pillow. He lets you rest on his chest, his arms wrapped securely around you. “You’re stuck with me now,” he teases, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. His warmth, his scent, the steady rhythm of his heartbeat—it’s all so comforting, you end up falling asleep in his arms, safe and loved.

-♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎-

‧ ୨ hyunjin ୧ ‧

If Hyunjin notices you're feeling off, he’ll instantly become the calm presence you need. He won’t rush to ask you a million questions, but he’ll quietly observe, sensing the shift in your mood. “You okay?” he’ll ask softly, his tone calm and gentle. Without making a fuss, he’ll grab your favorite blanket and wrap it around you, sitting close by, just quietly being there with you. Sometimes, he’ll rest his head on yours, offering his comfort through his presence alone.

When you’re feeling down or drained, Hyunjin knows that sometimes the best thing is a little peace and quiet. He’ll sit next to you, not demanding anything, just offering a steady, calming energy. He might gently stroke your arm or hair, his soft touch making you feel grounded. “I’m here, you don’t need to talk,” he’ll whisper, letting you know that just being near him is enough to help you relax.

Hyunjin has a way of bringing a calm vibe even in the quietest moments. If you’re feeling uncomfortable, he’ll quietly pull you into his arms, letting you rest your head on his chest. He’ll hum a soft tune, his voice low and soothing, creating a peaceful atmosphere that helps take your mind off any discomfort. “Just breathe, everything will be okay,” he’ll murmur, as you close your eyes, feeling safe in his embrace.

Even when he’s being calm and gentle, Hyunjin’s attention to you never wavers. If you mention cramps or feeling off, he’ll quietly get up to make you tea or get your favorite snacks, all without making it a big deal. When he returns, he’ll simply hand them to you with a small smile, his voice quiet but filled with care. “Here you go. Take it easy for now, okay?” His soft, caring nature always shines through in the simplest moments.

-♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎-

‧ ୨ han ୧ ‧

When Han notices you're feeling off, he’s the perfect mix of dramatic and calm. He’ll dramatically gasp and clutch his chest, “Noooo, not my baby,” but his soft, concerned gaze tells you he’s genuinely worried. He'll immediately get to work, grabbing your favorite snacks or a cozy blanket, all while maintaining that cool, quiet energy. “You’re gonna be okay. I’m here,” he’ll reassure you, his voice calm but carrying an undertone of sincerity that makes you feel safe.

If you're feeling overwhelmed, Han’s playfully dramatic side will come out to distract you. He’ll dramatically flop onto the couch beside you, letting out a huge sigh as if the whole world is crashing down. “The pain, the agony... I can’t bear to watch you suffer,” he’ll say, trying not to laugh as he gives you a playful look. He knows it’ll lighten your mood, and he’ll gently coax a smile out of you without being too much.

Though he’s playful, Han knows when to keep things quiet. He’ll sit next to you, quietly rubbing your back or running his fingers through your hair, his touch soft and steady. He won’t force conversation, just giving you the space to relax while still showing you that he’s there. “I’m right here… just rest, okay?” His calm, comforting presence wraps around you like a warm hug.

When you need comfort, Han’s sweetness comes out in the softest ways. He’ll pull you into his lap, his arms wrapped around you as he murmurs softly. “It’s okay, baby. Just sleep... I’ve got you.” He’s quiet, but his gentle touches and soothing words make you feel like everything’s going to be okay, even when the world feels like it’s spinning.

-♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎-

‧ ୨ felix ୧ ‧

Felix, being the sunshine he is, will first make sure you're absolutely comfortable. He’ll tiptoe around the room quietly, making sure to dim the lights, as he knows a soft atmosphere helps you feel better. He’ll gently ask, “Do you want me to play your favorite playlist? I know the soft songs help when you’re not feeling well.” He’ll make you feel like a priority, always quietly moving to cater to your needs without making you feel like a burden.

When you're feeling down, Felix has a very nurturing side that shines. He won’t just offer a quick solution; he’ll really dive into the comfort routine. “How about a warm bath? I’ll make it nice and relaxing, and we can watch a show after,” he’ll suggest with a gentle smile. He’s meticulous about the little things, running the bath at the perfect temperature, lighting a candle, and making sure the towels are soft and ready when you’re done. It’s all about making sure you feel pampered.

Felix might be the type to prepare a surprise snack for you, but in a subtle way. He won’t make a big deal out of it; he’ll just quietly come back with your favorite treat and a cup of tea, setting it beside you with a soft grin. “I thought you might need a little something,” he’ll say, offering the snack with a sense of quiet joy. He doesn’t need praise for it, he just loves to see you taken care of and happy, even in the smallest ways.

If you're feeling really bad, Felix will make sure you're completely relaxed in his presence. He won’t try to push you to talk, but rather let you know that he’s here for you. He might offer to play a gentle game or even suggest you both take a nap together, where he’ll wrap his arms around you to keep you warm. “I’ll keep you safe, don’t worry. Just let me know if you need anything,” he’ll say, his voice soft and full of sincerity. It’s all about offering that quiet, protective comfort that makes you feel like everything will be okay with him by your side.

-♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎-

‧ ୨ seungmin ୧ ‧

Seungmin isn’t the type to be overly dramatic or overly soft, but when he notices you’re uncomfortable, he steps up in his own way. Without saying much, he’ll disappear for a few minutes and return with a heating pad, a glass of water, and whatever snack he knows you like. He won’t make a big deal out of it, just setting everything beside you with a simple, “Here. Take this.” It’s his way of showing care without making you feel fussed over.

If he catches you whining about cramps or feeling miserable, he won’t sugarcoat things. “You act like you’re dying every month,” he’ll tease with a smirk, but the second you glare at him, he’s already adjusting your blanket and tucking you in. He’s playful, but he knows when to draw the line. After his teasing, he’ll sit next to you and absentmindedly rub your leg or hold your hand, quietly making sure you’re okay.

Seungmin’s love language during your period is distraction. He knows sitting around focusing on the pain won’t help, so he’ll casually toss you the TV remote. “Pick something to watch, and don’t make it something boring.” If you’re not up for a show, he’ll challenge you to a game on your phone, knowing that getting competitive will make you temporarily forget about how bad you’re feeling.

If you’re extra tired and just want to rest, Seungmin won’t be over-the-top affectionate, but he’ll stay close. He might sit on the floor beside the couch, scrolling on his phone, but every once in a while, he’ll check on you with a soft, “You still alive?” If you fall asleep, he won’t move, letting you rest peacefully while he stays right there—quietly looking after you in the most Seungmin way possible.

-♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎--♥︎-

‧ ୨ jeongin ୧ ‧

Jeongin may not always know exactly what to do when you’re feeling bad, but he tries his best in his own thoughtful way. The first thing he does is pull out his phone and search for the best ways to help with cramps or discomfort. “Okay, so Google says heating pads and snacks help... I can do that!” He’ll rush off to get everything, sometimes bringing back a completely random snack just because he thought it might cheer you up.

If he sees you curled up in pain, he’ll frown and sit beside you, resting his chin on his hand while observing you closely. “You look like you’re about to cry,” he’ll say, a little too bluntly, before quickly adding, “Do you want me to make you laugh? I’ll do something really dumb if it helps.” He’ll start making weird faces or doing a terrible dance just to see you smile, his own laughter filling the room when he sees it working.

Jeongin’s way of comforting you is casual but sweet. He won’t always say much, but he’ll stay close, scrolling on his phone next to you or playing a game while occasionally glancing over. Every so often, he’ll nudge your arm and say, “You good?” If you mumble that you’re not, he’ll sigh dramatically and hand you his hoodie. “Here. Hoodies fix everything.”

If you’re feeling extra exhausted, Jeongin will get a little softer without making it obvious. He’ll let you rest your head on his lap while he plays with your hair, humming softly without even realizing it. When he notices you getting sleepier, he’ll whisper, “Just sleep, I’ll wake you up if anything happens.” His quiet, reassuring presence makes you feel safe, and though he might pretend he’s not doing anything special, he secretly loves taking care of you in these little ways.

[cutiecusp]

Safe.

A continuation of this

A Simon 'Ghost' Riley x Soaps sister fic.

What happens when you knock on your brothers door for help, and Simon answers?

Tw. Brief dv implication, sexual talk, a kiss or two. MDNI.

The rain was heavy as you ran to your brothers house, heels long forgotten, just you in a ruined dress and a bruised eye.

You don't stop as you hear him calling your name, urging you to get back in the car, that it would never happen again.

Your heart is pounding in your chest as you reach your brothers flat, both hands battering down the door, hoping you were louder than the rain.

"Johnny, Johnny please!" You scream, your voice heavy with worry.

The door opens mid pound, making you stumble into a broad chest, and an accent unlike your brothers spits out.

"Oh little dove, who did this to you?"

You feel his gaze flicker down his body, his eyes stopping at the bruises on your face, the split lip, and then travelling down to your torn dress, your bare feet.

Ghost.

The one man you knew other than Johnny who would protect you with his life.

You shake, your body exhausted from the adrenaline boost, and being caught in the rain.

Ghost wraps his arms around you, gently pulling you out of the rain, passing you a blanket from the chair to cover yourself with.

You stiffen as you hear heavy footsteps behind you, the weight of them forever in your mind.

"I see, running straight into another man's arms, bitch?" Jake snarls, alcohol giving him the bravery to stand there in the doorway.

He doesn't get any further before you are shoved to the side, and a spurt of blood erupts from Jakes nose.

Ghost stands there in your place, snarling like a guard dog, shaking his knuckles.

"Watch your mouth around her." He advises cooly, taking in your (ex) boyfriend, his unnerving stare relentless in its dominance.

Jake staggers to his feet, clasping his nose.

"She ain't worth it, wouldn't give it up anyway, frigid cunt." He spits a ball of blood, landing on Ghosts shoes.

Ghosts eyes flick to yours, pushing you further in the house, shutting the door behind him, leaving you alone to find some of Johnny's clothes to get warm in.

Outside, you hear scrapes and five small high pitched screams, just barely louder than the rain, before Ghost steps in, his face a cool mask until his eyes meet yours.

"He won't bother you again." He grumbles, his deep voice filling the room.

You settle on the sofa, using the blanket as a shield.

"In fact. He probably couldn't touch a woman again in his life with the way I broke his fingers." He scoffs.

Looking over at your pale, shivering form, he gives an apologetic look.

"Sorry. No filter. Johnny's not back until tomorrow evening. I'm looking after the flat till then."

You nod, you had always had a light friendship with Ghost, and you knew there was a dark soul under the light smiles you always recieved.

"Let's take a look at ya." He gestures to your face.

"Looks like he got you pretty good." He says, standing to get the first aid kit.

You swallow down your embarrassment as you felt his touch on your face.

"You probably think I'm stupid-" you began, but he silenced you with a look.

"You remind me of my mother." He states plainly, wiping down your bloody lip and smoothing a balm over it.

"She was my father's punching bag, especially when he'd had a bottle. She was funny, kind, and didn't deserve it either"

You take in what he's saying, Johnny never told her about Ghosts home life, only it was a sad one.

"One day, she snapped back. Stood there and gave it back, her face a rainbow of bruises, but she fought back." He continues softly, almost as if he's talking more to himself.

He applies more balm over the cut on your cheek, a dark glance as he noticed it matched Jakes ring.

"What surprised me at the time was no one helped. Everyone knew about it. My mum was a good person, but she had no one. You have someone. You have me. " He decides, seemingly happy with his handiwork.

You nod, unsure what to say.

"Thank you." You muster up instead.

He nods, packing away the kit, before flicking on the kettle.

You two sit in a comfortable silence, mug clasped in both hands as you relax into the sofa.

Your eyes drift shut, you feel Ghost take your cup out of your hands and place a quick kiss on your forehead.

You are fast asleep soon enough, too asleep to hear Ghost pull out his phone and call in a favour.

"Gaz? Gonna need info. Jack Darrington. And a clean up crew." He listens for a few minutes before hanging up.

"You'll always have me." He says out loud to you as he slips out into the night.

.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.

@kaeyasfuturewife @muneca-lemon-steppa @gardenof-venus @misshugs @soraya-daydreams @frudoo @renpodz @yesornowaitidontknow @thevoiceinyourheadx @shadowdark00 @rynbeerose @lunamoonbby @incredible-walker @identity2212 @pukbadger @urbimom @corvid007 @wordsfromshona @shadows-empress @m00xy @canyonmooncreations @oniraki @evie-119 @havoc973 @kylies-lover-blog @ishipdabands @cmbghost @heckinspooks @midwesternwitchery @eggy-yoke @masterclassofescapism @s-a-v-a-n-a-34 @skeletonsucker

[cutielando]

allergies | lando norris

synopsis: in which your allergies strike at the worst possible moment

a/n: based on this request!

pairing: lando norris x allergic!reader

my masterlist

The paddock was buzzing with energy, a familiar hum of excitement filling the air as mechanics moved swiftly, journalists weaved through the crowd, and fans pressed against barriers hoping to catch a glimpse of their favorite drivers.

It was just another race weekend, another high-stakes event where the roar of engines and the scent of burnt rubber set the scene.

You had been standing near the McLaren garage, chatting with some of the engineers when it started.

At first, it was subtle - a tickle in your throat, a slight tightness in your chest. You dismissed it, blaming the humidity or the strong scent of fuel lingering in the air.

But then it escalated.

Your breath hitched, throat constricting as a wave of panic surged through you. Your vision blurred slightly, and your skin felt like it was burning. It didn’t take long for the realization to sink in.

You were having an allergic reaction.

You had always been careful. Always checked what you ate, what you touched. But somehow, something had triggered it, and now you were in the middle of the paddock, struggling to breathe.

Your hands trembled as you clutched at your throat, trying to find your voice, but all that came out was a wheeze.

Lando was in the middle of a media session when he caught sight of you. He saw the way your body wavered, the way your hand gripped the edge of a table for support.

His heart plummeted at the sight of you struggling to breathe.

“Wait, sorry” he muttered abruptly to the reporter in front of him before pushing through the crowd, his mind solely focused on you.

By the time he reached you, your knees had buckled.

He barely caught you in time, his arms wrapping around your frame as you gasped for air.

“Hey, hey, what’s wrong?” he asked frantically, his grip tightening around you as if holding you together would somehow make it stop. “Talk to me, love.”

You tried, but the words wouldn’t come. Your eyes were wide, filled with fear, and it made his own chest tighten painfully.

“Shit” he cursed, looking around. “She’s having an allergic reaction! Someone get help!”

A McLaren medic was already rushing toward you, an EpiPen in hand.

Lando refused to let go of you, holding you close as they administered the shot, his free hand brushing strands of hair away from your sweat-dampened forehead.

“You’re okay,” he murmured over and over, voice thick with worry. “I’ve got you.”

The next few minutes felt like an eternity. Your breathing was still labored, but slowly - agonizingly slowly - it began to ease.

The tightness in your chest loosened, and the panic that had gripped your mind started to ebb away.

Lando exhaled sharply, pressing a kiss to your temple.

“You scared the shit out of me” he said.

Your voice was hoarse when you finally spoke.

“Didn’t mean to” you said, an apologetic smile on your face despite what you had just gone through.

He let out a weak laugh, though his eyes were still clouded with concern.

“You’re never leaving my sight again” he stated, his tone stating it obvious that there was no room for questions or complaints.

The medics insisted on taking you to the medical center for further observation, and Lando was glued to your side the entire time, fingers laced tightly with yours.

He didn’t care about the race weekend, the press, or the cameras catching every moment of his worry - none of it mattered.

All that mattered was you.

And he wasn’t letting go.

comments and re-blogs help us grow!

much appreciated!!

REQUEST HERE

[agentpeggycarterrogers]

Peggy gasped with each deep thrust. They fit so perfectly together; they always did. Body, heart, soul. In life and in bed. “God, yes, my love.”

God. He felt so good. He was going to leave a mark on her skin, but she didn’t care. This was their honeymoon, and she didn’t mind that he loved her so much to claim her. Besides, his lips on her body felt so wonderful.

“Oh, yes my darling. My perfect husband.”  

Peggy moaned as he pushed inside her. She nodded and kissed him. “God, Steve. You…” That’s all she could say. It was all him. “This is everything.” 

Her body responded, her hips rolled into him. She moaned again, and reached up to stroke his cheek. “Love you always.” She kissed his cheek and his jawline. “Can’t get enough of you, honey.” 

She was full of him inside her, and surrounded by him, wrapped his arms, his body, and consumed by love for him. Peggy could stay here in this moment forever, and she’d be completely happy. 

@steven-g-rogers

[mcrdvcks]

i just need this love spiral

summary: Logan just wants one night alone with you.

word count: 1.5k+

pairing: Logan Howlett x fem!reader

notes: here was the request that inspired this!

this is set in the same world as Deck The Halls, but you don't have to read that to understand this!

(also this may be my shortest oneshot ever!?)

warnings/tags: reader and logan have a bio kid, laura, fluff, mention of drinking wine, implied sex

Mornings were always Logan’s favorite part of the day—a close second was nighttime. In the mornings there was usually nothing to worry about, he could hold you for as long as he’d like with no interruptions.

Until Laura came along. Then Sierra. Then Rocky, your rescue pit bull.

And now, mornings usually meant a cramped bed, Rocky taking up the bottom half, curled up by Laura, and Sierra curled up between you and Logan.

Logan let out a slow exhale, staring at the ceiling. His arm was pinned under Sierra’s small body, her head tucked into your shoulder. Laura was sprawled out, one foot kicking into his ribs. And Rocky—damn dog—had taken up the whole bottom half of the bed, his body curled up against Laura’s legs.

This wasn’t what he had in mind when he woke up.

He turned his head slightly, watching you sleep. Peaceful. Comfortable. Completely unaware of the fact that he was being physically restrained by your children and a dog. His wife was right there, within arm’s reach, and yet completely inaccessible.

He sighed again, quieter this time.

Then Sierra shifted, rolling toward him in her sleep, and smacked him in the face with her tiny hand.

Logan groaned, running a hand down his face. That was it. Enough was enough.

He carefully peeled Sierra off his arm, settling her between you and Laura. She didn’t even stir. Then he scooted down, maneuvering around Rocky’s dead weight and slipping out of bed as quietly as possible.

You mumbled something in your sleep but didn’t wake. He reached over, brushing a stray piece of hair from your face.

Then, before you could stop him, he hooked an arm around your waist and pulled you out of bed.

"Logan," you yelped, barely catching yourself as he dragged you toward the door. "What are you—"

"Shh," he muttered, leading you out of the room and shutting the door behind him. "You’re mine for five minutes. That’s all I’m askin’."

You blinked at him, still groggy. "What?"

Logan huffed a quiet laugh, pulling you toward the couch. "Five minutes. Just me and you. No kids, no dog, no elbows in my ribs."

You let him drag you along, still trying to wake up. "You’re that desperate?"

"Yeah," he admitted without shame, settling onto the couch and pulling you onto his lap. His arms wrapped around your waist, holding you close like he’d been deprived for days instead of just a few hours.

You sighed, resting your forehead against his. "You’re ridiculous."

"Maybe." His hands ran slowly up and down your back, warm and steady. "Ain't like I don’t love ‘em. But I’d like to wake up next to my wife at least once in a while, not buried under a pile of kids and a damn dog."

You snorted. "You’re the one who said Rocky could sleep in the bed when it storms."

"Didn’t mean every night," he grumbled, nuzzling into your neck. "And Sierra—she’s got her own bed, but no, she’s gotta be right in the middle. Laura’s got a whole room, but she still sneaks in."

"They love you."

"Yeah, yeah, I know," he muttered, but you could hear the affection in his voice. He exhaled slowly, his grip tightening just a little. "Just wanted a minute with you."

You softened at that, wrapping your arms around his shoulders. "You could’ve just woken me up earlier."

"Tried. You looked too peaceful," he admitted. "Didn’t have the heart to move you ‘til I got smacked in the face."

You grinned. "Sierra?"

"Who else?"

You laughed quietly, fingers brushing through his hair. "She’s got good aim."

"Real funny," he deadpanned, but his hold on you stayed firm, like he was soaking up every second.

You hummed, leaning into him. "Guess we’ll have to start locking the door, huh?"

"Already thought about it," he said. "If I don't, I'm never gettin’ you to myself again."

You smirked. "So dramatic."

"Call it whatever you want." He pressed a kiss to your temple, voice low. "You're mine first, remember that."

"Yeah?" You tilted your head, lips just brushing his. "You sure about that? Because I think Sierra might have something to say about it."

Logan groaned, letting his head fall back against the couch. "Gonna start fightin’ a five-year-old for my own wife. This is my life now."

You grinned. "Yep."

His hands slid lower, gripping your hips. "Lock the door tonight."

You bit back a laugh. "We’ll see."

---

Though Logan couldn’t technically get drunk, let alone tipsy, your alcohol tolerance was much lower now that you had Sierra. Which meant that after a small glass of wine you felt like you were on the moon.

Logan locked the bedroom door with a quiet click, turning back to you with a smirk. "Not takin' any chances tonight."

You laughed, a little loopy from the wine as you flopped onto the bed. "How responsible of you."

He climbed in after you, hands already finding your waist as he pulled you close. "Not responsible—just tired of gettin’ cockblocked by my own kids."

You snorted, wrapping your arms around his neck. "You are dramatic."

He hummed, nuzzling into your neck. "Maybe. But I finally got you all to myself."

His lips brushed against your skin, slow and teasing, his hands sliding up your back. You sighed, relaxing into him, fingertips trailing through his hair.

"Y'know," you murmured, tilting your head to give him better access, "I think the wine's making me very agreeable."

Logan chuckled against your throat, his breath warm. "Yeah? That so?"

"Mhm." You grinned, pulling back just enough to look at him. "You should take advantage of that."

His grip tightened on your hips. "Oh, I plan to."

Logan kissed you, slow and deliberate, like he had all the time in the world. His hands slid under your shirt, fingertips trailing warm patterns against your skin. You sighed against his lips, pressing closer, feeling the familiar heat coil between you.

Then—

Click.

The unmistakable sound of the door unlocking.

Logan froze. So did you.

Before either of you could react, the door creaked open, and small footsteps padded into the room.

"Mommy? Daddy?" Sierra’s sleepy voice cut through the darkness.

Logan exhaled sharply through his nose, his forehead dropping onto your shoulder. You bit your lip, trying not to laugh. His grip on you loosened just enough for you to shift, tilting your head toward the door.

"Sierra, honey, what’s wrong?"

"Rocky took my blanket," she mumbled.

From the doorway, Rocky let out a soft huff, the kind of noise that said he wasn’t giving it back anytime soon.

Logan groaned quietly, rolling onto his back. "I locked that damn door."

"She’s five," you whispered, amused. "Locks mean nothing to her."

Sierra took a few steps closer, rubbing her eyes. "Can I sleep with you?"

You started to sit up, but Logan caught your wrist. "Nope. No way. Not tonight," he muttered under his breath, then turned his head toward Sierra. "You got your own bed, kid. Go back to it."

She pouted. "But Rocky—"

"—is a thief, I know," Logan grumbled. "Go grab another blanket."

Sierra huffed, clearly unimpressed with the suggestion. "But—"

"Laura," Logan called, already knowing his other kid was lurking.

A beat of silence, then—

"How’d you know?" Laura’s voice piped up from the hall.

Logan scrubbed a hand down his face. "Because I ain’t stupid."

Laura stepped into view, arms crossed, a knowing smirk on her face. "We were gonna see if we could sneak in without you noticing."

"Yeah, well, noticed," Logan muttered. "Not happening tonight."

Sierra’s bottom lip wobbled. "But—"

"Nope," Logan cut her off. "Go on. Back to bed, both of you."

Laura didn’t argue, but Sierra whined, "Daddy—"

Logan sighed, sitting up. "Sierra, sweetheart, I love ya, but me and your mom need some time alone."

You pressed your lips together to stifle a laugh. Wrong choice of words.

Laura snorted. "Gross."

Sierra frowned, still half-asleep. "Why?"

Logan sighed again, dragging a hand through his hair. "Because I said so."

Sierra huffed dramatically, turning on her heel. "Fine."

Laura grabbed her hand, leading her away. "Come on, before they start kissing again."

Sierra made a gagging noise, and just like that, the two of them were gone, the door closing behind them.

Logan leaned back against the pillows, eyes closed. "I’m puttin’ a deadbolt on that damn door."

You laughed, rolling onto your side to face him. "You’re really struggling, huh?"

"You have no idea," he muttered, tugging you back into his arms. His grip was firm, like he was making up for lost time. "Now, where were we?"

You smirked, brushing your lips against his. "I think Rocky was about to steal another blanket."

Logan groaned. "That dog’s lucky I love him."

"Yeah, yeah," you teased, threading your fingers through his hair. "Now, are you gonna keep talking, or…?"

He didn’t need to be told twice.

[iamgonnagetyouback-recs]

SIRIUS BLACK.ᐟ

a little list of my favorite stories ୨ৎ remember to be kind, reblog, and support the wonderful authors who share their magic with us.ᐟ

NOTE ಇ. none of these stories belong to me ♡ if you’d like your fic removed, just send me a message, and i’ll take care of it!

date by @sun-kissy

⁀➴༯ sirius for some reason thinks you have a crush on regulus

REVIEW ୨ৎ oh my god the tension in this had me actually holding my breath, san. sirius being all dramatic and broody while reader is just exhausted with potions?? perfect. but then the confrontation?? my heart hurt for both of them. sirius being jealous and insecure and reader being so confused but so soft when she realizes what's happening. and the james/regulus mention?? peak comedy. the ending was so sweet, i'm actually kicking my feet

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ୨ৎㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

forever by @/sun-kissy

⁀➴༯ you're cold, and you're in love with sirius

REVIEW ୨ৎ this was absolutely gorgeous. the tenderness, the pining, the way every little movement is soaked in love—it’s stunning. you have such a delicate way of writing sirius, san, i love it! the smoking detail was such a perfect addition—how he doesn’t put it out but still adjusts for you, how you bought an ashtray just for him. it’s intimate in the way that truly knowing someone is intimate. and that cuddle request??? i nearly stopped breathing. the way reader braces for rejection only to be met with sirius’ sure, get over here, babe—it wrecked me. and then the way he pulls her closer, holds her like it’s second nature? absolutely everything. “my arms have no curfew, sweetheart. they’re content to hold you as long as you please.” —i’m going to be thinking about that line for days. i’m in awe.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ୨ৎㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

right where i want to be by @appocalipse

⁀➴༯ it's only when lily accidentally spills amortentia on you and all you can smell is cigarettes and dog fur that you realize you're in love with sirius — probably the only person in the world you shouldn't be in love with

REVIEW ୨ৎ oh this hurts in the best way. the slow, creeping realization, the way sirius just knows and won’t let her run from it, the tension??? i’m actually losing my mind. the teasing, the softness, the way he says i want you like it’s the most obvious thing in the world??? i need to lie down. no one disturb me, except maybe you amy cause well you wrote this

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ୨ৎㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

shy!reader by @moonstruckme

⁀➴༯ bf!sirius teasing reader about something, and it actually hurts her feelings quite a lot? maybe she's always thought she's to shy for him, and he teases her about being quiet and it just hurts so much that he sees her just like everyone else does? like she thought he understood her, but instead he's teasing her about something she's really insecure about

REVIEW ୨ৎ this is so soft i could cry. sirius just knows her, and even when he messes up, he listens, he cares. the way he apologizes??? instantly, genuinely, with no ego—i’m in love. and the way he tucks her into his space so easily, so naturally, like she belongs there??? i’m melting. i now identify as a puddle of tears from all this fluffiness

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ୨ৎㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

clingy!sirius by @inkdrinkerworld

⁀➴༯ sirius being clingy and your friends teasing you guys

REVIEW ୨ৎ this is the most disgustingly adorable thing i’ve ever read. sirius is just so in love and unashamed about it, and everyone else is exasperated but also just accepting of his dramatics. like yeah, of course he buries himself under her shirt like a needy puppy, what else is new?? i am weak

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ୨ৎㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

kids by @/inkdrinkerworld

⁀➴༯ you are unsure about having kids

REVIEW ୨ৎ oh this is so soft i actually can’t breathe. the way they’re so open with each other and sirius just listens???? no judgment, just love???? and the way he reassures her without trying to change her mind??? “we can keep our family just like this” i’m actually going to cry. and then the stupid little “and a cat” moment like please. and him being like “i don’t think i could put someone over you” like sir. that is the most sirius black thing i’ve ever heard. i love them so much this fic is everything

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ୨ৎㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

i got you first by @thatdammchickennugget

⁀➴༯ "if i scare you tonight, you'll owe me a kiss." with sirius black but in the end he ends up getting scared

REVIEW ୨ৎ oh, this is delicious. sirius trying so hard to get a reaction out of her, only for her to completely turn the tables on him?? absolutely love. and that moment in the maze? when she flips the game on him, and he just folds under her touch?? yeah. that man is gone. completely and utterly wrecked by her. the way he just stares and then that lazy grin—i swear, i felt that in my soul. also, the fact that their first kiss isn't rushed or desperate, but soft and slow? sirius black, you are in love. and so am i with this fic

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ୨ৎㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

sober feelings by @lovemenotts

⁀➴༯ bsf!reader with him out of the blue suggesting 'what if we kiss but not in a dating way?'

REVIEW ୨ৎ oh my god. oh my god. this was everything. the casual suggestion like it’s nothing while my heart is combusting?? sirius being all cocky but then immediately spiraling after??? the way he was so worried the next day i'm gonna cry. and then the confession??? i am on the floor. “we should’ve kissed as friends a long time ago” sirius please be serious about me next

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ୨ৎㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

yellow hearts by @nottswitch

⁀➴༯ the times you put yellow hearts around his name, and the times he put them around yours

REVIEW ୨ৎ this was so soft i’m actually going to cry. the progression from absolute mortification to comfort and love??? sirius teasing but also so gentle???? the yellow hearts showing up again and again??? and the honeymoon bit oh my god. their bickering is so stupid and adorable and so them. the fact that they get their little happy ending and it’s literally framed in yellow hearts. i’m unwell

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ୨ৎㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

bad dog by @lupinsversion

⁀➴༯ sirius has a bad habit of flirting with others, especially in front of his girlfriend. has she finally had enough?

REVIEW ୨ৎ oh he DESERVED that bonk on the head. “bad dog” is actually the funniest and most fitting reaction ever. like yes, he’s sirius black, of course he’s going to be a little shit about flirting, but also? he needs to learn. and i love that james and remus are calling him out too because yeah, it’s “harmless” but it’s also not harmless when it clearly hurts his girlfriend. sirius sulking about it and realizing he actually feels bad?? good. let him sit in his wrongness and learn from it. this was so well done, i loved it but ahem mak i think i speak for all when i say part is needed

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ୨ৎㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

a marauders guide to siblings by @ellecdc

REVIEW ୨ৎ this was absolutely delightful. james potter and his love for love, his pure dedication to making this triple date happen—it’s so him. the way he just won’t take no for an answer, and how everyone else is reluctantly dragged into his chaos, is peak marauders energy. and the dialogue? oh mama. i love how everyone interacts here, from sirius being completely against it because of the “googly eyes” problem, to remus and regulus just being exasperated with the entire situation. and the moment james finally gets what he wants, only to immediately start overthinking it and worrying about the sibling connections?? absolutely hilarious. and sirius being all soft for reader, saying she was worth the nonsense? perfect. this was so fun to read, i adored every second of it!

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ୨ৎㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤmain blog ￫ @iamgonnagetyouback

[whosashan]

Hiii! I’m sorry I couldn’t find if you were open for requests or not so if you don’t take any at this moment please ignore this.

I really love your style of writing and I was wondering about how lads boys would react if MC asked them if they are in love with her or who she was in the past life. I know with Caleb and Zayne it can be tricky but I was thinking that maybe Zayne remembered his past or like MC suddenly remembered everything? That’s just an idea I had in my mind.

Anyways like I said please ignore this request if you don’t take any at this moment or you don’t like that idea!

Have a nice day❤️

Who do you love?

A/N:Hi there! Thank you for your request. You didn't specify if you want it to be more angsty or strictly fluffy, so I did a bit of both ;p I tried to base it off of their myth's, but since I don't have Sylus' and Rafayel's memory cards, I eyeballed it. I hope you'll like it, any feedback is greatly appreciated :] Have a nice day!

For a while now, an insidious question has gnawed at the recesses of your mind. Perhaps it stems from deep-seated insecurities, a relentless curiosity, or something more profound and unsettling.

Since uncovering the intricate tapestry of your past with your lover, a disquieting thought has taken root: are you merely a stand-in for someone who no longer exists? The paradox is maddening—you find yourself envious of a former self. The notion pierces your heart with a sharp, unyielding pain, knowing that there was once another—ironically, another version of you—who preceded you. That person was, undeniably, their one true love.

You grapple with the tormenting thought: are you genuinely the one he loves now, or are you simply a surrogate, a shadow of the past?

Xavier

The room was bathed in the soft glow of candlelight, shadows flickering against the walls, casting elongated shapes that danced with every shift of the flames. The air was warm, thick with the scent of wax and faint traces of Xavier’s smell - something so uniquely him.

He laid across the couch, head resting on your thighs, his platinum hair spilling like silk over your lap. Your fingers moved through the strands absentmindedly, tracing over his scalp in slow, rhythmic motions, just the way you knew he liked. His breathing was steady, his body relaxed, and for a fleeting moment, everything felt peaceful. Intimate. Safe.

But your thoughts refused to be still.

You wondered—had he been like this with her too? Had she tangled her fingers in his hair just as you did now? Had she peppered his cheeks with soft kisses, stolen those rare, beautiful laughs that you cherished so much?

The thought shouldn’t sting. It was you, after all. The past version of you, the one whose fate had already been entwined with his long before you even remembered him. And yet, there was a weight in your chest, something heavy, something bitter—regret? Uncertainty? You should have been grateful. It was you. It had always been you. But still, the question gnawed at you.

How different was she?

Did her smile tilt the same way? Did she struggle to keep her hair neat, no matter how much effort she put into it? When she laughed, did her cheeks lift high enough to crinkle the corners of her eyes?

The flickering candlelight traced soft golden hues over Xavier’s face, his lashes casting delicate shadows against his cheekbones. His beauty was almost inhuman, sculpted and refined, made even softer by the haze of drowsiness settling over him. He was close to sleep, lulled by your touch. Maybe it was cruel to ask now, to shatter this moment of quiet serenity.

But you couldn’t stop yourself.

You inhaled sharply, trying to gather the courage that had been slipping through your fingers. And then, in a voice barely above a whisper—

"What was she like?"

The silence stretched.

You thought, for a moment, that he had already fallen asleep, that your question would go unanswered. Relief and disappointment tangled together in your chest, neither strong enough to win over the other.

Then, his voice, soft yet weighted.

"Who are you asking about?"

His head shifted slightly, his dark lashes fluttering open just enough for blue eyes to meet yours. There was exhaustion in them, slight confusion, as if you had pulled him from the edge of sleep. Your fingers stilled in his hair, and he let out a quiet, displeased groan at the loss of comfort.

"Her. I mean… me. The past me." The words felt clumsy, uncertain. How were you even supposed to ask something like this?

Xavier’s brows knit together for a second, a flicker of thought crossing his face before his expression settled back into something unreadable.

"You were the same person you are now." His reply was immediate, almost dismissive, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

But that wasn’t enough.

"I want you to be more specific." Your voice was barely above a breath, but there was something desperate beneath it.

He exhaled, fingers idly drawing slow, deliberate circles on your thigh, as if the motion would somehow ease whatever storm was brewing inside you.

"She was… eccentric," he finally said, his voice quiet, thoughtful. A pause. A hesitation. "Always stubborn. Always insistent. Never knowing when to give up." A ghost of a smile tugged at his lips. "Not that much different from you now."

You scoffed, more out of reflex than humor. "Should I feel insulted?" you muttered, though your voice lacked any real bite.

But then, as quickly as the moment of levity had come, it was gone again. The question that had been clawing at your ribs threatened to spill from your lips.

And then—

"Did you love her more?"

It barely came out, the words fragile, splintering even as they left you. Your entire body tensed.

Xavier’s hand stilled against your thigh. For the first time, something flickered across his face—surprise, maybe even hurt. Slowly, he lifted his head, pushing himself up until he was finally at eye level with you. His gaze studied you intently, tracing every furrow of your brow, every small tension in your lips.

And then, gently—so, so gently—he cupped your cheek, his thumb brushing over your skin with a tenderness that sent warmth curling through your chest. He was close now, so close you could feel his breath ghosting over your lips, his warmth wrapping around you like a quiet promise.

"I would love every form of you the same." His voice was steady, unwavering. "For me, you will always be the one. Whether it’s the you from before, the you now, or the you in another lifetime. It doesn’t matter if you were human, a fairy, or even a worm."

A small, teasing smirk curled his lips at the end, a deliberate attempt to ease the tension, to coax a reaction from you. And it worked—heat crept up your neck, settling in your cheeks, and despite everything, you felt the ghost of a flustered pout forming on your lips.

Xavier leaned in, pressing a soft, fleeting kiss to the tip of your nose, before pulling back just enough to meet your gaze once more.

"Never doubt yourself again, hm?"

And then, without waiting for an answer, he pulled you into his arms, tucking you against his chest, your face fitting perfectly into the crook of his neck. His embrace was warm, steady, grounding. The kind of touch that made all your doubts seem small, insignificant.

Because even if your question hadn’t been answered completely, even if some part of you still ached for something more—there was one thing you were certain of.

He never made you feel like she was better. He never made you feel like you had to compete with your own past.

For Xavier, it was always you.

Zayne

The only sound in the dimly lit room was the rhythmic clicking of keyboard keys, an almost hypnotic cadence breaking through the thick silence. The golden glow of Zayne’s desk lamp illuminated the contours of his sharp features, casting long shadows over his workspace. He sat with his usual meticulous posture, his frame effortlessly composed, exuding an air of quiet authority even in something as mundane as working. The reflection of his laptop screen glimmered faintly against his glasses, obscuring the rich hazel depths of his eyes.

Across the room, you lounged on the couch, your body half-sunk into the plush cushions, a book resting open in your lap. Despite the separate worlds you were both immersed in, there was a comfort in just existing beside him—his presence was grounding, a constant anchor in a sea of uncertainties.

Your gaze trailed over the words printed on the page. A romance novel—one that struck too close to home. It told the story of a man who spent lifetimes searching for his lover, chasing fragments of them across time, waiting for fate to intertwine them once more.

“Is it really me you love? Or the person—the people—I used to be?”

The line cut through you like glass, burrowing itself deep into the pit of your stomach.

Your fingers hesitated over the page as your eyes flickered toward Zayne. He remained at his desk, seemingly lost in his work, his expression unreadable. His dark hair fell slightly over his face, a few strands brushing against the thin frames of his glasses. Even when exhausted, he looked composed—controlled.

It was foolish, perhaps, to ask. You knew how he hated to be interrupted when he was deep in thought, yet you also knew yourself. If you didn’t speak now, the words would fester, gnawing at you like a wound left untreated.

"Zayne."

His name left your lips barely above a murmur, but he heard you. He always did.

His fingers stilled over the keyboard, his posture shifting as he leaned back into his chair slightly. He turned to you, the dim light catching the sharp angles of his jawline.

"Yes, love?" His voice was deep, slightly hoarse from disuse, carrying with it a subtle weight of exhaustion.

You hesitated. Just for a moment.

Sensing it, Zayne pushed his laptop aside and stood, his movements slow, deliberate. Without a word, he made his way toward you, his presence a steady force as he settled beside you on the couch. Lifting your legs with ease, he draped them over his lap, his fingers resting absentmindedly against your ankle. His warmth bled into you, solid and grounding.

Encouraged by the gesture, you swallowed and forced yourself to ask the question that had been lingering in your mind for far too long.

"What was my past self like?"

His brows lifted slightly, his fingers pausing their absentminded movements. "That’s a rather unexpected question," he murmured, adjusting his glasses—a telltale sign of nervousness, though he would never admit it. "What’s brought this on?"

You frowned. "Don’t change the subject."

A subtle exhale left him, barely audible, but you caught it. You knew him well enough to recognize when he was trying to sidestep something.

"I don't remember everything." His voice was measured, but there was a slight tightness to it. "Fragments, maybe. Fleeting pieces that don’t quite form a complete picture. But from what I do recall…" He trailed off, adjusting his glasses again before continuing.

"She wasn’t so different from you now." His tone was contemplative, as if choosing his words carefully. "Determined. Unyielding. Always knew what she wanted and wouldn’t rest until she got it." A small pause. "Much like you."

Your lips pressed into a thin line. That answer—it wasn’t enough.

"Did you love her more?" The words came out before you could stop them.

This time, his reaction was immediate. His entire body tensed, his fingers tightening just slightly against your leg—not enough to hurt, but enough for you to notice.

His eyes met yours, a flicker of something unreadable flashing across his expression before it smoothed into something composed once more.

"As far as I’m concerned, she is you. Every version of you—past, present, future—exists within the same soul, deeply ingrained in me. To compare them would be a fruitless endeavor. There has never been a question of more or less—there is only you."

His voice was even, unwavering, but there was a weight to his words, something deeper lying beneath them. A certainty so absolute that you almost felt ridiculous for asking.

Still, a part of you felt… silly. Jealous over yourself. How insecure could you be?

But it wasn’t insecurity, was it? It was the cruel weight of uncertainty, the knowledge that there were pieces of yourself you might never truly remember. And that truth would always linger, like a ghost in the back of your mind.

Zayne, ever perceptive, seemed to sense the turmoil playing behind your eyes. He lifted his hand, his fingers trailing up your arm before settling against your own, giving it a light squeeze. His thumb brushed over your knuckles, a grounding gesture.

A smirk—barely there, but unmistakable—tugged at the corner of your lips as you met his gaze. "Is that so? Then tell me more."

Zayne let out a soft, resigned sigh, shaking his head just slightly. But even as he feigned reluctance, there was the unmistakable ghost of a smile playing at the edges of his lips.

And somehow, even if your question wasn’t entirely answered, even if you knew the uncertainty would return again someday—right now, his presence was enough.

Rafayel

Laughter filled the dimly lit bedroom, loud and breathless, bouncing off the walls as you squirmed beneath Rafayel’s relentless assault. His fingers moved with precision, ghosting over your sides, tracing over sensitive spots he had long since memorized. Your body arched in protest, hands weakly attempting to shove him away, but he was stronger, faster—his lips curled in amusement as he watched you crumble beneath his touch.

"Alright, it's enough!" You gasped between helpless giggles, trying—failing—to inject authority into your voice. The demand might have carried weight if not for the way laughter cracked through it, rendering it powerless.

Still, Rafayel, ever the merciful tormentor, finally relented. With a low chuckle, he slowed his movements, his hands instead settling on your waist, fingers splayed lazily over your hips as if he had all the time in the world. Then, in a gesture as disarming as it was tender, he leaned in, pressing playful kisses across your cheeks, your nose, the corners of your lips—each one stealing the remnants of your breath.

Your smile only widened, cheeks flushed a warm pink.

When you finally opened your eyes, he was already watching you, his usual mischief softened by something more dangerous—something deeper. His dark hair framed his face in perfect disarray, stray strands falling over his forehead, and his striking blue-pink eyes shimmered with something unreadable.

"You're killing me, cutie." His voice was honeyed, teasing, yet laced with a quiet reverence. "From all that laughing, I figured you loved my fingers on you. Should I take that as a request?"

A flick to his forehead wiped the smirk off his lips.

He gasped dramatically, cradling the spot as if you had mortally wounded him. "Now, you need to kiss it better!" His pout was exaggerated, his dramatic flair in full effect, yet beneath the playful act was a calculated charm—one that had always made him so dangerously captivating.

Rolling your eyes, you indulged him, leaning in to place a soft kiss on his forehead. The faint imprint of your lipstick lingered, and you smirked to yourself, deciding to keep that detail to yourself. It suited him, after all.

Rafayel hummed in satisfaction, but then his expression shifted. "That’s slightlyyy better." A pause. "Now, how about we order some seafood?" His lips curved into a small, knowing smile, his tone lighthearted.

And yet—your stomach dropped.

Your expression faltered, barely perceptible, but Rafayel caught it instantly. His head tilted slightly, amusement fading into mild confusion. "What is it? Wasn't it your favorite?"

Your blood ran cold.

"I told you—multiple times—I hate seafood." Your voice was steady, but the weight behind it was anything but. It wasn’t the mistake itself that stung—it was the realization that followed.

It was her favorite.

The realization came like a blade, cutting through you mercilessly. The past you—the before you—the version of yourself that had lived and loved Rafayel long before your memories had been wiped away.

You weren’t her. You weren’t the one he had fallen for first.

The air in the room felt heavier now, thick with unspoken words.

Rafayel’s face fell. His usual mask of arrogance slipped, replaced by something fleeting—regret, guilt, self-reproach. He cursed himself under his breath, running a hand through his hair. "Ah—sorry… we'll get Chinese, yeah?" His voice, usually so smooth, so effortless, now carried an edge of uncertainty. He was scrambling. He knew he had messed up.

But the damage had already been done.

Because you finally saw it—the cracks in his reassurances. The way his stories about her had painted a picture you could never quite step into. She had been different. More confident. More cunning. More effortlessly herself.

More like the version of you that you always wished to be.

Your chest tightened, and before you could stop yourself, you turned away from him. You couldn’t bear to meet his eyes. Not now.

"Cutie…" His voice dropped to a murmur, gentle, coaxing. You felt his fingers ghost toward your cheek, but you recoiled before he could touch you.

That reaction made something shift in him.

The softness vanished, replaced by something colder. His jaw tensed, his lips parting slightly in what could have been a plea—but he hesitated.

You swallowed against the lump in your throat.

"Did you love her more, Rafayel?"

The words cut through the silence like a blade. There was no teasing lilt in your voice, no room for him to twist the moment into something playful. No. This time, you weren’t giving him an escape.

His body went rigid, his lips parting slightly as if the sheer audacity of the question had momentarily stolen his breath. Then, panic flickered in his eyes—just for a second.

"What?—Of course not!" The words left him too quickly, too forcefully. "I mean, god, you're the same person." His voice was rough, desperate, but the way he said it—like he was trying to convince himself just as much as you—made your stomach churn.

"Liar."

A whisper. Sharp. Accusing.

You pushed yourself up, slipping from his grasp, but Rafayel moved fast, his fingers catching your wrist before you could step away. His grip wasn’t forceful, but it was enough to make you halt.

"Where are you going?"

"Home." Your voice wavered, but your resolve did not. "I can't—I don't want to talk to you right now."

He tensed. "Y/N, don’t do this—"

"I need time." You exhaled, voice gentler now, but firm. "We’ll talk when I’m ready."

You didn’t wait for his reply.

The moment you slipped from his grasp, the warmth of his touch faded, replaced by the chilling weight of distance. And as you walked toward the door, you felt his gaze burning into your back.

But he didn’t chase you.

Not this time.

And as the door shut behind you, leaving Rafayel alone on his vast, king-sized bed, you both knew—

This wasn’t the end of the conversation.

Not even close.

Sylus

The silk sheets pooled beneath you as you sat on Sylus' bed, the fabric smooth against your skin. The soft glow of the bedside lamp bathed the room in golden hues, casting long shadows as you rummaged through the bags at your feet—your most recent indulgence. Or rather, his indulgence.

"You didn’t have to buy all this for me, you know," you murmured without looking up, fingers brushing over the expensive fabrics, the scent of luxury still clinging to them.

Across from you, Sylus leaned against the grand headboard, his arms lazily crossed, an amused smirk playing at his lips. His crimson eyes glimmered under the dim light, ever watchful, ever knowing.

"And yet, somehow, I still managed to," he mused, his voice a smooth melody laced with amusement. "Truly tragic, how I remain cursed with wealth and the urge to spoil you."

You rolled your eyes, but the small smile tugging at your lips betrayed you.

"Why don’t you give me a fashion show, sweetie?" he suggested, tilting his head slightly.

Your excitement sparked instantly. You barely spared him a glance before gathering the bags and rushing into the bathroom, the sound of his low chuckle following you as you disappeared behind the door.

As you sifted through the clothes, something caught your eye—a dress you didn’t remember picking out. The color was… odd. Not bad, necessarily, but definitely not something you would have chosen for yourself. It washed you out in a way that felt unnatural, like a version of you that wasn’t quite right.

Sylus.

You sighed, shaking your head with a fond smile. He had excellent taste; he’d picked out dresses for you before—ones that flattered your figure, ones that made you feel effortlessly beautiful. But this? This felt like it belonged to someone else.

Still, you slipped it on. It’s always nice to try something new, you reasoned. And besides, you could always return it.

Stepping out of the bathroom, you straightened your posture, putting on your best model walk as you sauntered toward him with a small, playful smile.

Sylus’ gaze swept over you, slow and deliberate.

"You look ravishing," he murmured, his deep voice thick with something you couldn’t quite place. He pushed off the headboard and closed the space between you in an instant, his hands slipping to your waist, pulling you flush against him. The scent of his cologne wrapped around you, warm and intoxicating.

"You think?" you asked, though your gaze drifted downward again, fingers idly smoothing over the fabric.

"That’s a rather interesting choice, boss." The nickname was teasing, but there was a layer of curiosity beneath it. "I don’t think I like this color on me, but if you do… I suppose I’ll wear it anyway."

A soft chuckle rumbled from his chest.

"Nonsense," he dismissed easily. "You’ve always looked stunning in this color. Or any color, for that matter, kitten."

Something in your chest twisted.

Your brows knitted together slightly as you peered up at him. Maybe you were overthinking it. Maybe he meant nothing by it. And yet—

"I’ve never worn this color before, though." You chuckled, keeping your tone light, masking the unease settling at the edges of your mind.

Sylus said nothing at first. A beat of silence stretched between you, but his grip didn’t falter. His expression remained unreadable, except for the slight glint of something in his crimson eyes—something calculated.

You knew this game. You knew how he played.

He was refined, meticulous with his words, carefully measured in everything he did. Sylus didn’t make mistakes.

And yet, you had caught one.

He loved you. That, you never doubted. His devotion was absolute, unwavering. But there was always this—this lingering ghost of someone else. A woman you had once been. A woman you no longer remembered. A woman you weren’t even sure you were.

And yet, she still lived here. In his mind. In his stories. In his memories of you.

"I can practically hear your mind working." His voice was smooth, but there was a quiet edge to it. "Speak."

You hesitated. You didn’t want to ruin the moment. Didn’t want to pick at something that might unravel everything.

"You seem to like reminiscing about the past," you finally said, keeping your voice even, careful.

His eyes darkened slightly.

"Of course," he said simply, as if it were the most natural thing in the world. "Why wouldn’t I? The moments I’ve spent with the one I love should not be forgotten."

Your chest tightened.

He didn’t see it the way you did. To him, the past and the present were intertwined, threads of the same existence. But to you? The past felt like it belonged to someone else entirely.

"Is that so?" Your lips curved into a wry smile, though the bitterness in your voice was barely concealed. "Then tell me, Sylus—who do you love more? Her or me?"

It was meant to sound like a joke. A playful jab. But the moment the words left your lips, the room shifted. His grip on your waist tightened, his body going still. His expression didn’t change, but you knew him well enough to see the flicker of surprise in his eyes.

"What kind of question is that, kitten?" His voice remained steady, but there was something underneath it now—something more careful.

"It doesn’t matter if it’s the past or the present I’m thinking about—it’s always you on my mind."

But it didn’t feel like it.

Not in the way that mattered.

You swallowed, the months of quiet insecurities bubbling up, spilling over before you could stop them. "I don’t want you to think about her," you admitted, voice quieter now but no less firm. "It’s in the past—the past I don’t even remember."

A beat of silence.

For the first time that night, Sylus looked genuinely caught off guard. His expression wavered for the briefest moment before something else took its place—something softer.

"…I apologize." His voice, always so effortlessly poised, now carried an unfamiliar weight. "I never meant to make you feel that way, sweetheart. I won’t mention it again."

And yet—right now, it wasn’t enough.

"I need a moment for myself." The words left you before you could think them through.

You turned, ready to step away, but his fingers curled around your wrist—not tight, not forceful, just there.

"I won’t stop you," he murmured. "Take all the time you need." His hand lifted, brushing against your cheek, his touch warm, careful. You refused to meet his gaze, afraid of the emotions that might spill over if you did.

"But know that —when you’re ready, I’ll be right here."

A pause. Then, softer—so tender it nearly broke you—

"I love you."

And then, he pressed a lingering kiss to the top of your head before letting you go.

And just like that, you slipped away from him.

Out of the room, out of his reach, out into the night, letting the wind carry you as you tried to untangle the storm of emotions inside you.

You weren’t sure how long it would take. An hour, a day, a month.

But Sylus—he would wait.

He always did.

Caleb

A/N:For Caleb, I decided to twist it a little and instead make it about your future self. Hope that's alright!

It was always easy to be carefree with Caleb nearby.

He made the world feel manageable—as if no matter what went wrong, he would be there, steady as ever, grounding you with nothing more than a glance. You hated how much you depended on him, how much you needed him, but he made it feel so natural, so right.

And even now, as you perched on the kitchen counter, watching the way his muscled back flexed with each movement, the rhythmic sound of his knife against the cutting board filling the space between you, you thought—maybe this is it. Maybe this is all I need.

Your gaze lingered. It was the only sight you ever wanted to see.

Caleb, as if sensing your attention, let out a low chuckle. "I can feel you staring, pipsqueak." He turned his head slightly, a boyish grin tugging at his lips. "Should I be flattered or concerned?"

Your heart stuttered. No matter how much he changed over the years, that grin—that teasing, infuriating grin—never did.

"You're a terrible chef," you huffed, crossing your arms. "I’ve been waiting for my dish for, what? An hour now?"

He snorted. "Fifteen minutes, actually."

"Felt longer."

"Impatient as ever." He shook his head, flipping something onto a plate with practiced ease.

You chuckled softly, but the warmth in your chest flickered, cooling as a shadow of uncertainty crept into your mind. You hated thinking about the future. The unpredictability of it, the way it loomed, stretching out like an abyss, no matter how tightly you tried to hold onto the present.

Lost in your thoughts, you didn’t notice Caleb moving until his presence was right there. His hand shot out, pinching your cheek.

"Finally got your attention, pips." His voice was teasing, but the weight behind it was unmistakable.

You groaned, swatting his hand away as he set your plate aside. His violet eyes—always so sharp, so unnervingly aware—locked onto yours.

"What's going on in that little head of yours, hmm?" He leaned in slightly, voice still playful, but now edged with something serious.

You hesitated.

It was stupid. You knew it was stupid to ask. But the words clawed at your throat, relentless.

"I was just thinking..." you mumbled, staring down at your dangling feet.

"Rare sight." He smirked.

You shot him a glare and shoved at his chest, earning a low chuckle.

"Shut up." You exhaled, fingers tightening around the hem of your shirt. Then, before you could lose your nerve— "Caleb, do you see me in your future?"

The teasing glint in his eyes faded instantly.

For the first time in the conversation, his smirk disappeared, replaced by something unreadable. He stared at you, brow furrowing slightly, as if trying to figure out why the hell you’d ask something so ridiculous.

Then—without hesitation— "You’re the only thing I’m certain about in my future."

Your breath hitched.

"It’s you, by my side, exploiting me as your personal slave." His lips quirked up, but you knew him too well. The humor was a shield, a flimsy attempt to soften the truth beneath it.

And the truth was—Caleb didn’t make promises easily. He was a liar, through and through. You knew that. Hell, he was probably the biggest liar you’d ever met.

But right now?

There was no lie in his voice. No hesitation in his certainty.

And for the first time in what felt like forever, the future didn’t feel so terrifying.

But doubt was a cruel thing. It never let go easily.

"But what if I’m not the same?" you murmured, fingers idly toying with the fabric of your shirt.

Caleb scoffed, ruffling your hair with a tenderness that contradicted the smug grin on his face.

"Then I’ll adapt to whatever version of you I get." His voice was soft, but his grip—his presence—was solid.

Your throat tightened as warmth bloomed in your chest. You wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer, breathing him in.

"Even if I become the worst version of myself?" you teased, tilting your head slightly.

Caleb hummed, amused. "If that’s the case, I’ll just make sure I become the best version of myself." He leaned in, voice dropping to something lower, something that sent a shiver down your spine. "And if your worst self turns out to be particularly sadistic, well..." His lips barely brushed against yours, his breath warm against your skin. "I’ll make sure to satisfy your cravings, baby"

Heat coiled in your stomach. You barely had a second to react before he pulled back, pressing a finger to your lips just as you tried to close the distance.

"Ah-ah. Eat first, pips."

You groaned. "You’re impossible."

He chuckled, eyes glinting with something dark, something possessive. Something that promised—no matter what version of yourself you became, he would always be there.

With Caleb, there was only one certainty in life—

You would always have someone who loved you unconditionally.

[gay-dorito-dust]

This is really, really, really long…

A lovesick Joaquin was a sight to behold Sam figured as he watched the new falcon practically brimming with joy when you stepped into the room, and while she was already smiling before but Joaquin’s face might as well have been split in half with how widen his smile had become within a matter of seconds, Sam would be surprised if in the end his cheeks didn’t end up hurting by the end of the day.

Sam could read Joaquin like a book -a short one- as he always wore his emotions on his face no matter how often he tries to disprove this observation from him, all the while his face and body language contradicts his words, especially when your name was brought up. All of a sudden his posture was straightened, chest was puffed up like a prideful birds and his dark eyes would eagerly scan the entire room for you, only to deflate and dull when Sam doubles over in laughter.

‘You’re so whipped for them man it’s not even funny at this point.’ He says between fits of laughter, his abdomen aching with each full body laugh that came out of his mouth.

‘That wasn’t cool Sam, not cool at all.’ Was all Joaquin replied with, feeling a little silly for falling for an obvious prank -that and remembering that you were out on a rather simple solo mission- but his mind, heart and soul were that infatuated with you to a degree where all he needed for a good day was to see you.

If there was anyone aware of his own tell tell signs of being a lovesick idiot besides Sam, it was Joaquin and he couldn’t help but internally groan every time he was with you, knowing he was bound to do something stupid that would be clear enough for you to know his feelings as if he has written: I like you very much, and I would’ve done something more romantic then this, but please spare me and go out with me? Onto his own fucking forehead.

He can’t help how he feels but he swears that if he saw himself outside of his own body somehow, then he would wished to die as he could already see that he was far from subtle, especially with how eager he was to find his arm over your shoulder or grab you by the elbow when you were walking close to the road before switching sides with you. And that’s not to mention how eager he was to partner up with you on missions to the point where the team expected you two to be partnered together; Joaquin could still remember the knowing look upon Sam’s face whenever he did this, something that made him wonder if the rest of the team knew of his feelings, and something deep down told him that they did but didn’t say it like Sam did.

Sam pats him on the shoulder one he had recorded from laughing, wiping a tear from his eye. ‘Aww is someone sad that they’re not here and won’t be back until later this evening,’ he then narrows his eyes as he leans towards Joaquin, who tries to lean away from him but finds his attempt in doing so useless, ‘are you going to be first in line when waiting for them so you can hug them first or?’

‘I’m glad my feelings for them are amusing to you man.’ Joaquin says as he crosses his arms over his chest.

Sam only squeezed his shoulder, his teasing smile became reassuring, having already done enough testing of the poor man for a day. ‘I’m just trying to have you attempt to actually say something to them about your feelings instead of looking at them like a lovesick puppy!’

Joaquin raises his brow. ‘And teasing me about my feelings is your best solution?’ He asks sarcastically, which makes Sam give him an unimpressed look. ‘Just tell them when they get back or me teasing you will be the least of your issues.’ He says rather pointedly, as though it was a promise he’d keep if he didn’t uphold his end in all of this.

Joaquin groans, throwing his head back. ‘And how can I when all they have to do is batt their eyelashes at me and smile and suddenly I’m weak in the knees, it’s difficult, nothing will happen between us.’

Sam makes a face at this and remarks ‘it’s only difficult if you keep trying to finds ways in making it difficult, someone in love would leap at the chance to be with that person, not run away from it and make excuses.’ Sam then puts his other hand on Joaquin’s shoulder, looking him deep in the eyes so he knew he had Joaquin’s full attention. ‘So are you going to let the love of your life walk out of your heart and into the arms of another because confessing was too difficult for you, or are you going to finally allow yourself and them the happiness you both deserve with each other?’

Joaquin didn’t need to think all too deeply about it, he never did when it came to you as there was not a doubt in his mind that could have him questioning or second guessing himself, especially for when it came to matters of the heart as he often lead with it as much as his mind. The fear of rejection was strong but he knew Sam was right in what he says, he could claim that confessing would be the death of him but that would only be him speaking with fear, not his actual voice.

Joaquin’s actual voice would tell him to confess because he wouldn’t know unless he tried, he wouldn’t know whether you felt the same towards him or not, and making assumptions that you didn’t on your behalf wasn’t helping and might as well have been an insult towards you. He would speak truthfully from his heart and not let anything cloud his judgment, not even the hypothetical scenarios where it could all go wrong could deter him from speaking the truth, and all it took was for Sam to be serious with him about it.

‘No, I won’t.’ He says and Sam smiles, knowing that he finally gotten through to him.

‘Good. Now why you standing here for? Go get them!’ He then exclaims as he all but practically shoved Joaquin out of the room and in the direction that he knew you’d soon enough take when come back from a mission, wanting to destress from it all by changing in your comfiest clothes. Meanwhile Joaquin was trying to keep his resolve as he planned on meeting you halfway when he saw your figure from afar, a smile stretching across his lips as though it was second nature.

‘Joaquin?’ You asked.

‘In the flesh.’ He says as the warmth feeling started to blossom within his chest as he felt light on his feet as though he might start floating, but that was the usual feelings he got from being within your presence. ‘So how was the mission.’ He adds.

‘Nothing worth being haled a hero for. Only a simple get in and get out with important information that could destroy or save humanity depending whose hands are on it type of deal.’ You shrugged before deciding to change the topic of discussion. ‘How are you? I didn’t keep you waiting long did I?’ You added, wanting nothing more then to hear his voice after going long without it, even if it was a small mission it didn’t change the fact that you missed Joaquin’s ability to make them go by faster.

Joaquin chuckles as he steps towards you. ‘Not at all. If anything you have me at the best possible time, which so happened to be right now.’ He adds a little clumsily but it only made your smile widen as you took a step forwards him, solely for the purpose of being close to him and nothing more.

‘What is it that you’ve got on your mind that it can be only said right now pretty boy?’ You asked as casually as you could as to stop yourself from saying something stupid, not wanting to let your mind misread the situation before he could say what he needed to say.

Joaquin scratched the back of his head as he began to shifted his weight on one foot to the next, a habit you’ve noticed that only happened when you were near or complimented him in any capacity, it was cute but it made you wonder the reason behind such sheepish behaviour, when you knew the man was far more confident. Was it you? You couldn’t help but internally scoff at such a selfish thought, no matter how much you wanted it to be true.

‘I was wondering if you’d like to go on a date?’ He asks you, all the while his heart within his chest was now in his throat as his hands became clammy with nerves, his feet feeling like lead that rooted him to the floor making him unable to move even if he wanted to. You hummed playfully. ‘Depends on who the person I’m going on this date with is.’

‘Me. It’s me. so go out with me before I start listing off 101 reasons why I think we’d be great together.’ Joaquin responded almost immediately and the sound of your laughter man the man feel as though he was on cloud nine, so when you reached out to touch his arm reassuringly, Joaquin swore he saw the rest of your conversation in some sort of outer body experience.

‘Yeah I’ll go out with you, as long as I still get to hear this 101 reasons though because I wanna cross reference some things to my own 101 reasons we’d be good together just to be certain.’ You replied, squeezing his arm as you leaned to kiss his cheek before passing him by, making sure to look back at him as you add over your shoulder. ‘See you then pretty boy!’

Joaquin only smiled dopily to himself as he pumped the air with his fist. ‘Fuck yeah!’ He says to himself as he all but walks past Sam with a swagger in his step, his mind completely elsewhere for him to realise that neither of you had chosen a time or a day for your fate.

[wonweige]

I want to see more of the princess's life on being a reminder of someone everyone lost! Maybe she acts like them unknowingly and Mydei is getting more overprotective cause of it!

❝ 185139144 ❞ ✶ but I see her in the back of my mind all the time ! ; not proofread — ignore typos </3 ++ reader (gn!) referred to as ‘you + parent + beloved’ (reader is NOT the little princess)

low-key feel like i didn't do this req justice erm </3 if you want me to redo this just tell me and i will !!

── .✦ THE LITTLE PRINCESS, who can feel the watchful eyes of guards no matter where she goes. her small hand clings to the skirt of her governess/nanny as they walk through the market, her expression not showing how she was slightly unsettled and also exasperated. seriously, did she really need guards watching over her 24/7 from the shadows? it was bad enough her uncle phainon constantly popped up out of nowhere and- oh, there he is now.

── .✦ THE LITTLE PRINCESS, who deadpans comically as her father enters her room for the umpteenth time that day, checking up on her and making sure she was safe and unharmed. she hadn't even left her room for half of the day, simply playing with the many toys her father had gifted her with, and here MYDEI was, fussing over her like she had been battling nikador himself.

── .✦ THE LITTLE PRINCESS, who finds herself staring at the painting of her parent more and more, finding the resemblance between her and them a bit... uncanny. down to the even the smallest curve of the face. she really was a carbon copy of them.

── .✦ THE LITTLE PRINCESS, who has been sleeping next to her dad for a while now.. she thinks he's been having nightmares, but she can't really be sure because her father isn't the type of guy to want company while he sleeps just because he's been having nightmares. still, every night, he either goes to her room or she goes to his and he holds her in his strong arms like she'd vanish if he let go.

── .✦ THE LITTLE PRINCESS, who likes watching her father train and spar with others. she'll sit to the side, her uncle phainon next to her in case anything went wrong, and cheer on her father with a dazzling smile on her features, confident he'll win because he's the crowned prince and her super strong dad who could take on the entire galaxy if he wanted to!

── .✦ THE LITTLE PRINCESS, who does not know how MYDEI's heart feels heavy as he hears her cheer him on from the sides, her words the exact same as his late beloved's. it's almost enough to make him lose his focus.

── .✦ THE LITTLE PRINCESS, who adores the same food as you. it even has to be prepared the exact same way or else she won't even spare it a single glance. much to her delight, it seems that everyone she asks knows how to make it exactly to her liking, telling her that they've made it a million times before. she does her best to ignore how the people that prepared the dish look at her with looks of nostalgia.

── .✦ THE LITTLE PRINCESS, who notices how her outings with her governess/nanny grow less frequent and her outings with her father grow more frequent. not that she's complaining! she loves spending time with her father, especially because he can never say no to her and spoils her rotten even if it's unintentional. she doesn't like how she can't run off, though.. her father always holds her hand or carries her when they're out.

── .✦ THE LITTLE PRINCESS, who gives an unamused look to her father as he squints with disapproval whenever a boy talks to her. "daddy, he was just asking me where the nearest bathroom was." "he should've asked someone else." "..."

── .✦ THE LITTLE PRINCESS, who is adored by the people. who wouldn't love her? sure, she may be a bit bossy at times, but she always wants the best for those around her. such a smart little girl.

── .✦ THE LITTLE PRINCESS, who can't help but giggle as her father leaves their daddy-daughter tea party, pretty [color] bows in his hair, to attend a meeting. nobody would dare say a thing to MYDEI, however, because who would dare question the crowned prince? (phainon did not let it go, however.)

[pitchsidestories]

What do you fancy love ? II (Alexia Putellas x Jenni Hermoso x Reader)

romantic masterlist | platonic masterlist | word count: 1495

summary: Reader is just a girl who is sometimes insecure, but her girlfriends remind her how important she is to them. requested

author's note: Hi everyone, thank you anon for the request, and hopefully you and the other readers will like this little fanfic.🩷🩷

disclaimer: Everything in this fanfiction is purely fictional and nothing corresponds to reality. Slightly smutty ending.

You studied the photo on your phone closely. Tilting the device back and forth to avoid the glare on the screen and to find evidence of what you had told yourself over and over again in the past few days. It was Alexias’s post and naturally she looked stunning on it, smiling into the camera. Jenni was captured in side profile as she was turning towards you. She looked as cool as she always did. You were sandwiched between those two gorgeous women and the longer you stared at the photo, the less you felt like you fit in.

You couldn’t resist, your thumb instinctively clicked at the little speech bubble and the comment section opened. You already knew what was about to come.

Y/n just posted .. (let's pretend reader is Teresa in this picture)

User69: Are all three of them a thing?!

userloveswoso: no way. I mean Alexia and Jenni make sense but…

xXUserXx: yeah, they’re hot together but y/n kinda ruins it. Not sure what they want with her

You felt your stomach drop and your throat tighten immediately. While you continued to scroll through the comments, Alexias’s voice echoed through your shared flat: “Amor, where are you?”

The playful sing-song in felt completely out of place.

You cleared your throat and called: “In the bedroom!”

Instead of Alexia, Jenni shouted from the hallway: “Oh, I’m coming.”

You usually would have smiled about her eagerness to get into bed but right now, your eyes were still glued to that small screen in front of you.

Alexia groaned and scolded your girlfriend: “Jennifer, you can’t possibly always think of that one thing when you hear someone say the word bedroom.”

“What can I say? I was conditioned like a Pavlovian dog.”, Jenni laughed.

You felt their presence before you actually saw them standing in the doorway.

“Hi, did you get everything at the supermarket?”, you asked, forcing your voice to sound as casual as possible without looking up at them.

From the corner of your eye, you caught your girlfriends exchanging a glance.

“So, we’re not doing it?”, Jenni asked jokingly.

“Doing what?” You finally looked up at them and upon seeing Jennis’s smirk, you added: “Oh, you’re sure you don’t want to do it without me?”

Alexia frowned at you, her eyebrows knotting together in concern: “Okay, something is wrong. Tell us what’s going through your pretty head.”

“Pretty? Me?”, you repeated as she sat down on the bed next to you.

“Of course, you, you idiot.”, Jenni grinned from where she was leaning against the wall.

In contrast to hers, Alexias’s face was serious: “You act like we never say that to you.”

“The people seem to disagree.”, you said plainly and handed her your phone with a heavy heart. Jenni came over, leaning over Alexias’s shoulder as they both read through the comments.

The midfielder shook her head in disbelief. She was hurting for you as she saw what random people, complete strangers had to say about you and your relationship with them.:” Why would they say that?”

“Maybe they’re right.”, you whispered.

With a fierce passion Jenni disagreed:” No, those hiding behind their screens are wrong.”

Alexia said your name softly.

You almost couldn’t bring yourself to look in her beautiful hazel eyes. “Hm?”

“Don’t listen to them.”, she gently replied.

In your mind's eye, the hateful comments from the internet jumped out at you, and you quietly admitted: “It’s not that easy.”

“You can’t possibly believe that shit.”, the striker waved her hands in outrage.

In a tone that did not tolerate any protest, Alexia commanded: “Put the phone away for the night.”

“But..”, you started.

The blonde was quick to interrupt you:” You heard me.”

“Yes, relax, babe.”, Jenni tried to calm you down.

However, your thoughts left you no peace: “I don’t want to relax.” You could feel the panic rising in you as you spoke.

“You should though.”, Alexia responded.

Despite the worried look on your girlfriend’s faces, you observed:” No one says those things about any of you.”

“That’s not true, but besides who cares what they think?”, the raven-haired woman countered.

“I care, Jenni!”, you cried out.

It was in this moment that your lovers realized that you were in your early twenties, your career was on the rise, you still needed to learn how to deal with all of that outside pressure which came with being a public person.

The midfielder hated to see you so sad: “Calm down.”

To her great surprise, you got out of bed and announced: ”I’ll go for a walk.”

“Do you want us to join you or..?”, Alexia asked, sounding cautious.

Purposefully, you put on your shoes. You didn't have to think long about your answer to her question: ”No.”

As soon as you were on your way out, the door was just closing, the blonde let herself fall onto the bed with a tired sigh.

“Jenni, what do we do with her?”, her eyes wandered expectantly to her girlfriend who lay next to her.

Without giving it much thought, the older of the two suggested: “We have to show her that we know better than the stupid comments.”

“How?”

A dirty smile appeared on Jennis lips: “Well.”

“What if she’s not in the mood?”, Alexia objected.

The dark-haired woman began to stare at the ceiling, confessing with a wry smile: “Then I’m out of ideas.”

“Okay, we’ll try that.”, the midfielder decided.

A surprised laugh escaped Jenni's mouth: “Really?”

“Yes.”, she confirmed in a matter-of-factly tone.

It was early evening and there was a light breeze coming in from the sea that ran through your hair. The sunset was reflected in the water, which you could see from afar.

At the beginning of your walk, the anxiety weighed heavily on your young shoulders, but now that you were almost home again, you felt the weight lighten. The peace and beauty of the moment outweighed and calmed your inner turmoil.

“I’m back.”, you told your girlfriends once you stepped inside your shared appartement.

Again, it was Alexias voice floating over to you: “Come into the bedroom.”

“Uhm, okay.“, you said before you slipped out of your shoes and took a deep breath. You really didn’t feel like talking to your girlfriends again.

“Don’t let us wait.”, Jenni called too when you took too long to follow Alexias instruction.

You reluctantly did as you were told.

The bedroom looked a little different since you left it. There were candles burning everywhere and rose petals on bed. You had no idea from where they had appeared from. But most importantly, both of your girlfriends stood there in matching lingerie.

They looked incredibly hot but the sight of them like that was so surprising that it almost made you giggle: “Oh my god.”

Alexia reached out to you, gesturing to come closer: “Come here…”

“Seriously?”, you asked with a smile, still unsure if your eyes didn’t betray you.

Alexia nodded: “Yes, you know that I’m a serious person.”

“Hard to tell when you’re standing there in your underwear.”, you laughed.

Jenni, seemingly getting more and more impatient, walked over you with that typical mischievous smirk on her lips.

“Yes, and you, pretty girl, are still wearing way too many clothes.”, she grinned, her face close to yours. Skilfully, she slid her fingers under your sweater and started to lift fabric up.

“Excuse me? I didn’t say take them off.”, you protested jokingly.

Shrugging, Jenni pulled the shirt over your head: “No but I did.”

She immediately moved farther down, opening the button of your jeans.

Laughing, you pushed her away: “Stop.”

Alexia took Jennis spot right in front of you. Her thumb grazed over your cheek while she tenderly kissed your lips.

“Baby girl, do you still want us to stop?”

You blinked at her, your brain incapable of cooperating: “Uhm…”

None of your girlfriends moved until you gave them permission to keep going.

But you couldn’t resist, the desire was too strong.

You shook your head: “No.”

The smile Alexia and Jenni shared almost washed away the memory of these nasty comments again. They seemed genuinely happy that they were allowed to take care of you. You only realised that now. It wasn’t just about what you or anyone else thought. It was about what your girlfriends wanted. And they clearly wanted you.

Before you knew it, you laid on the bed in nothing but your underwear. Jennis fingers and Alexias lips were everywhere on your body. You loved it when they did that. It was almost like their playing styles on the pitch, complimenting and enhancing each other’s skills. There was no room for your own thoughts anymore. You were so absorbed in the action that you didn’t notice your phone sliding off the nightstand and landing under the bed. And if you had, you wouldn’t have cared. Their opinions were theirs, but your girlfriends made pretty clear that you belonged to them. That you were loved and desirable.

[lqveharrington]

Eleventh Birthday | D.M.

summary: it’s your son’s 11th birthday and it hits you harder than you thought it would.

pairing: dad!draco malfoy x mom!reader

includes: Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy and Dione Europa Malfoy (my shaylas), fluff, comfort, little bit of angst

a/n: narcissa would be proud of the name i gave draco's daughter

You stood in front of the grand fireplace, hands resting on your hips, teeth worrying your bottom lip as you surveyed the room. Streamers curled elegantly from the ceiling, and a shimmer banner spelled out Happy Birthday, Scorpius! in flowing golden script. Everything was in place—his carefully chosen presents sat neatly in the armchair by the stained glass window, and his cake, decorated with intricate frosting patterns, was safely stored away in the fridge. Yet, despite the meticulous planning, something still felt off.

Maybe it was the colors? No, everything was adorned in Scorpius' favorites. The decorations were perfect, yet unease settled deep in your bones.

A familiar warmth enveloped you as Draco's arm snaked around your waist. He pressed a lingering kiss to the curve of your neck, his touch grounding you even as your shoulders remained tense against his chest.

"I woke Dione like you asked, my love." He murmured, voice thick with affections. "She's changing before getting Scorpius for his birthday breakfast."

Draco tilted his head, catching sight of your solemn expression. Concern flickered in his silver eyes. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong." The response was automatic, though your fingers betrayed you as they absently fidgeted with his.

It wasn't something tangible that was missing—it was the weight of realization settling over you like an iron cloak. You had been so focused on making this birthday perfect that only now did it truly hit you: Scorpius would be leaving for Hogwarts soon. The very thought sent a dull ache through your chest.

Hogwarts. Miles and miles away from home. From you and Draco.

A shaky breath escaped your lips. Soon after, Dione would follow, leaving you and Draco alone in a house that had once been filled with laughter, mischief, and tiny footsteps racing down the corridors. The thought threatened to unravel you.

You willed away the sting in your eyes, blinking rapidly before glancing back at Draco. "I'm fine." You said, though the words wavered under the weight of emotions threatening to spill over.

But the floodgates had already begun to crack.

Images flashed in your mind—Scorpius and Dione, older, independent, no longer needing their parents the way they once had. A day where they'd brush off your affections, too busy with their own lives. The fear twisted in your gut, sharp and cruel.

Draco saw it before you could even utter another word. He tightened his hold on you just as your composure shattered. Silent tears spilled onto his chest as you crumbled in his arms, and he held you with the same unwavering strength he always had. His lips pressed reassuring kisses to you temple, his hand drawing soothing circles against your back until your breathing steadied.

He had known this day would come. He had known how hard you would take it. Your heart belonged not only to him but to the little family you had built together—a love embodied in Scorpius and Dione.

"You're going to be fine, my love." He whispered, his voice a steady anchor amidst your turbulent thoughts. He squeezed your shoulder gently, placing a soft kiss against your forehead. "I just need you to breathe. Can you do that for me?"

You closed your eyes, nodding as you matched his steady breathing. The rhythmic crackling of the fireplace filled the silence, the familiar beat of Draco's heart beneath your palm comforting you. Slowly, the storm inside you settled.

"Hey, look at me." Draco murmured, tilting your chin up so you met his gaze. A lopsided grin played on his lips, warm and reassuring. "Let's spend Scorp's birthday with love, alright?"

A small smile tugged at your lips, "Alright."

"Alright." He pressed another kiss to your forehead before tugging you toward the hall. "Now, let's see if Dione is ready."

"Hi, darling." Narcissa's bright smile greeted you the moment you pulled open the door, pulling you into a warm embrace. She loved you as her second child and always found a way to visit—although this visit was scheduled every year.

You hugged her just as tightly and let yourself relax in her motherly hold, giving your father-in-law a small smile. "Hi, Narcissa. Lucius."

Lucius nodded curtly in acknowledgement as you stepped aside, motioning them to follow into the living space. He absolutely despised the way you lived your life. There wasn’t a single house elf in sight, but you made his son happy—pure blood or not, he would tolerate you.

“Are your parents coming anytime soon?” Narcissa followed you further down the hall, the portraits of your family hanging everywhere.

“They'll be here next week. They had a business meeting in France." You fiddle with your fingers and let them enter the living room, waving your hand to summon the tea set from the kitchen.

A small grunt was Lucius’ only response at the mention of your muggle-born parents.

Narcissa pursed her lips at her husband’s reaction before smacking him lightly on the chest, her attention shifting back to the many unopened gifts scattering the room. "Where's the little prince?"

"Well, he's not so little anymore." Draco quipped as he appeared by your side, his hand naturally finding its home on your waist.

"Draco!" Narcissa beamed and pulled her son into a fierce hug, peppering his face with kisses.

"Mum!" Draco groaned, though the fond smile tugging at his lips betrayed him. He loved his mother with all his heart and never cared for theatrics such as these.

You squeezed his hand before calling out to your kids, “Scorp! Dione! Look who's here!"

"Grandmum! Granddad!" Their voices rang in unison as they barreled down the hallway, their excitement palpable.

Lucius chuckled as Scorpius all but tackled him in an embrace. Honestly, you believed he was more fond of his grandchildren than you and Draco. "Happy birthday, Scorpius."

"Thank you!" Scorpius beamed.

"Move! It's my turn!" Dione huffed, attempting to shover her brother aside.

"Dione." You chided gently before rolling your eyes as they switched grandparents.

Soon after the greetings, the two dragged their grandparents to the couches and began animatedly talking about their past adventures while you set the tea out for everyone. It was warming to see how close Scorpius and Dione was to them.

As Scorpius and Dione’s attention was grabbed by Lucius’ stories about Draco when he was younger, you hesitantly turned to Narcissa. "I have a question."

She raised her brows and set her teacup down—hands clasping together. "What is it, dear?"

You swallowed, twirling your wedding ring anxiously. “When Draco turned eleven, how did you handle the transition to an empty house?”

A knowing smile graced her lips. “It wasn’t easy, I’ll tell you that.” She took your hands in her own. “But I promise, you’ll adjust. Believe me, it was worse realizing you and Draco would be living far from us.”

“Not that far,” You murmured.

“We still have to apparate to visit, darling.” Narcissa squeezed your hands. “You’re lucky to have Dione for a little while longer. As much as I love Draco, I always wanted another little one myself. Dione will help ease the transition. And if not, you can always owl me.”

A genuine smile broke across your face. “Thanks, Narcissa.”

“Talking about me?” Draco’s voice teased as turned his attention to you and his mother, resting his head on your shoulder.

“Oh yes, just the worst things, my love.” You grinned and tilted your head to meet his eyes. “What is it?”

He whispered, “I think your little boy has something to say to you.”

You barely had time to react before Scorpius wrapped his arms tightly around your midsection, his face buried in your chest.

“Thank you, Mum,” He mumbled, burying his face deeper and deeper into your chest.

“For what?” You ran your fingers through his blonde hair and cup his face, stroking his cheek with your thumb.

“For everything.”

Your heart clenched as you hugged him back, holding on just a little longer. You weren’t sure what Lucius or Draco said to Scorpius, but it felt nice knowing that Scorpius truly appreciated you after everything. “Of course, baby. I’ll always be here.”

And you would be. Always.

The rest of the day unfolded in a whirlwind of laughter, love, and the kind of chaos that only a family like yours could create. Scorpius’s eyes lit up as he tore into his presents, his excitement infectious. Dione, ever the little instigator, tried to sneak a peek at the cake before it was time, earning a playful scolding from Draco. Narcissa and Lucius, though reserved as ever, couldn’t help but smile at the antics of their grandchildren. The house, usually so grand and imposing, felt warm and alive, filled with the kind of joy that only comes from being surrounded by the people you love most.

But as the day wore on, the reality of what was coming lingered in the back of your mind like a shadow. You caught yourself watching Scorpius more closely, memorizing the way his nose scrunched when he laughed, the way his hair fell into his eyes when he leaned over to examine a new gift. You found yourself holding Dione’s hand a little tighter, savoring the way she still looked up at you with wide, adoring eyes. The thought of them growing up, of them not needing you as much, was a bittersweet ache that you couldn’t quite shake.

Draco, ever perceptive, noticed. He always did. When the kids were distracted by a game of Exploding Snap with Narcissa, he slipped his hand into yours and gave it a reassuring squeeze. “They’ll always need you, you know,” he said softly, his voice carrying the weight of his own emotions. “Just in different ways.”

You nodded, swallowing the lump in your throat. “I know. It’s just… hard to imagine.”

“It is,” He agreed, his silver eyes meeting yours. “But we’ll figure it out. Together.”

The sincerity in his voice grounded you, as it always did. You leaned into him, letting his presence steady you. “Together,” You echoed.

As the evening drew to a close and the kids were tucked into bed, the house grew quiet once more. You and Draco sat by the fireplace, the crackling flames casting a warm glow over the room. The silence was comfortable, the kind that comes from years of shared moments and unspoken understanding.

“Do you remember when Scorpius was born?” You asked suddenly, breaking the quiet.

Draco chuckled while continuously stroking your arm softly, his laughter a soft, nostalgic sound. “How could I forget? You nearly broke my hand during labor.”

You laughed and leaned your head on his shoulder, the memory vivid in your mind. “And then he was so tiny. I was terrified I’d do something wrong.”

“You didn’t,” Draco said firmly, his gaze softening when he saw your soft look. “You were—are—an amazing mother. They’re lucky to have you.”

Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes, but this time, they were accompanied by a smile. “And I’m lucky to have you. And they are too.”

Draco reached over, brushing a strand of hair from your face. “We’re a team, remember? Always have been, always will be.”

You nodded, melting into his touch. “Always.”

The weeks that followed were a blur of preparations for Scorpius’s departure to Hogwarts. You helped him pack his trunk, making sure he had everything he needed—and then some. Dione, ever the protective little sister, insisted on adding a few of her own essentials, including a stuffed dragon she claimed would keep him safe. Scorpius rolled his eyes but accepted it with a fond smile.

When the day finally arrived, you stood on Platform 9¾, your heart in your throat. Scorpius looked so grown-up in his Hogwarts robes, his trunk beside him and his owl perched on his shoulder. Dione clung to your hand, her eyes wide with a mix of excitement and sadness.

“You’ll write, won’t you?” You asked, your voice trembling despite your best efforts.

“Of course, Mum,” Scorpius said, his tone exasperated but affectionate. “And I’ll be home for Christmas.”

You pulled him into a tight hug, breathing in the familiar scent of his hair. “I’m so proud of you,” You whispered.

“I know,” He replied, his voice muffled against your shoulder. When he pulled back, there were tears in his eyes, but he quickly blinked them away. “I’ll be fine, Mum. I promise.”

Draco clapped a hand on Scorpius’s shoulder, his expression a mix of pride and emotion. “Make us proud, Scorp.”

Scorpius nodded, his jaw set with determination. “I will.”

As the train pulled away, you stood there, watching until it disappeared from sight. Dione sniffled beside you, and you knelt down to pull her into a hug. “It’s okay, sweetheart,” You murmured. “He’ll be back before you know it.”

Draco’s hand rested on your shoulder, a silent reminder that you weren’t alone in this. Together, you turned and made your way back home, the house feeling a little emptier but still filled with the love that had always defined your family.

That night, as you lay in bed, Draco’s arm draped over you, you thought about the future. It was scary, yes, but it was also full of promise. Your children were growing up, but they would always be yours. And no matter where life took them, you would always be there, ready to welcome them home.

“We’ll be okay,” you whispered into the darkness.

Draco’s voice was soft but reassuring. “We will.”

And with that, you let yourself drift off to sleep, knowing that whatever came next, you would face it together.

©lqveharrington - all rights reserved. do not copy, translate or share my work on other media platforms

[yelenasdiary]

Little reader au! Reader is 11 and is being bullied at school because she has two moms. One of the kids calls her mom's a slur and she punches them. The school tries to suspend her and mama bears Nat and Wanda come to the rescue defending reader. Maybe ends with an ice cream reward??

Message Sent

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x Daughter! Reader, Wanda Maximoff x Daughter! Reader

Summary: You got in trouble at school for standing up for yourself, 

Angst, Comfort

Warnings: Homophobic slur (Fag), Mentions of homophobia, Mentions of Blood | 1.1K

AC: Thank you for sending this, I hope you enjoy! x

A Widow’s Sunshine Masterlist

The playground was buzzing with chatter, laughter and the occasional shout of excitement as you ran around playing ‘tag your it’ with your friends. You raced around the playground just like your late uncle, Pietro, would’ve, you were always the hardest one for your friends to tag. But the laughter and big smile soon turned to fear as you saw the schoolyard bullies approaching. 

“Look!” One shouted, pointing at you. “it’s the girl with two moms!” Snickered Bailey, a boy from your class. He was only a few inches taller than you but somehow it always felt like he towered over you. His friends, Drew and Blake, laughed as they stood behind him, pointing at you. Your cheeks flushed with humiliation; the entire playground was now looking at you. 

Feeling confident within himself, Bailey took a few steps closer to you with a teasing grin on his smug face. “Are you going to grow up and be a fag like them?” He teased once more. The feeling of humiliation quickly turned to a surge of anger that you couldn’t contain and in a moment of raw emotion, you stepped forward closer to Bailey and, with a quick motion, your hand in a strong fist, you punched the boy right in the face. 

The playground fell silent as Bailey tumbled back, landing on his backside. Laughter was replaced with gasps of shock, Bailey began to wail when he noticed the blood streaming from his nose. Your heart was pounding as you towered over the school yard bully, the playground around you turned to a blur as you death stared the boy.

“Y/n Romanoff!” A stern voice called, snapping you back to reality. You turned to see your teacher, Miss Smith, with her arms crossed over her chest. “Principal’s office, now!” She added. You sighed heavily knowing just how much trouble you were in as you began to make your way to the large building. “Bailey, come with me, we’ll get you cleaned up and you can tell me what happened” you heard your teacher’s voice behind you.

Lunch time was over, and you were still sitting outside the principal’s office. Miss Smith had not long taken Bailey in to discuss what had happened. Your heart felt heavy as you thought about how much trouble you were in, what would your moms think? 

Before your mind could begin to go deeper into thought, Mr Thompson opened his door. Miss Smith and Bailey walked out without saying a word, Bailey holding a tissue to his nose as he walked by you, sending you a glare. “Y/n, come in” Mr Tompson said in a rather disappointed tone. You pushed yourself up off the chair and walked into his office. Mr Thompson closed the door behind him before taking a seat behind his desk. 

“Y/n, Miss Smith and Bailey told me what happened today during lunch time” he started in a serious tone. “You know that we do not tolerate bullying in this school” he added.

“But…he was bullying me!” You corrected, trying to defend yourself. “He came up to me and made fun of me for having two moms and called them a slur!” You added. Before Mr Thompson could reply, his door swung open and in walked your moms.

“Honey, are you okay?” Nat said in a worry, giving your face a check over, “Mr Thompson said you got into a fight” she added. 

“I’m fine mom, I promise” you said, looking up at her. 

Your mother frowned in confusion, “what happened?” She asked. 

Wanda, gently placing a hand on your shoulder for comfort.

“It was Bailey again” you sighed, “I was just playing with my friends and he came up to me and made fun of me for having two moms and then he asked me if I was going to grow up and be a –“ you paused, not wanting to say the slur that was wrong at you so you looked up at Wanda, letting her read your mind. Wanda turned to Natasha and quietly whispered the slur so you wouldn’t have to say it. 

“So I punched him” you added. 

Your mother, Natasha, turned to Mr Thompson, crossing her arms across her chest, “let’s be clear here. Y/n isn’t the problem. She stood up for herself while this kid has been continuously bullying her!” She said sternly. 

Mr Thompson adjusted his glasses, “I understand your concerns Miss Romanoff, but we do not condone violence in this school. I’m sorry but I have no choice but to suspend Y/n” 

“But you condone homophobia?” Wanda looked at him. 

“Of course, not” he replied, looking up at your mother who stood protectively behind you. “Bullying of any kind is not tolerated here” he added. 

“So, let me get this straight” Natasha cleared her throat, “you’re going to suspend our daughter because she stood up for herself when she was the target of a homophobic slur? But because she hit somebody, this kid gets what? Nothing? A few moments of attention because he got some sense knocked into him?” 

Mr Thompson, taken back by Natasha’s words, “I was not aware of the nature of the situation until Y/n came in here. I was simply told that she had been given Bailey a hard time recently and today when Bailey asked her kindly to stop, she hit him” 

“That’s a lie!” You inserted yourself, “he is always making fun of me! He is always making others laugh at me, it’s not fair!” You snapped, holding bad your tears of frustration.

“If you’re going to suspend her for this, I will make sure everybody knows this school likes to give a pass for homophobic behaviour. Do I make myself clear?” Natasha said in a serious tone. Defeated, Mr Thompson finally relented. “Alright, I won’t suspend her, but I will speak to Bailey and his family. I do apologise for all of this. Y/n, you may go back to class” 

“Actually, we’re going to take her home” Wanda replied, sending a proud glance to Natasha. Your moms always taught you to stand up for yourself, others and what you believed in and today proves that you were taught well. 

As you and your mothers left school, Nat took your hand, “you did the right thing today sweetheart, I’m so proud of you” she smiled softly. 

“But you always said violence was bad” you replied. 

“It is, but, in this case, you used it to send a message and it was big one” your mother explained. 

Wanda smiled softly at you, “how about we go get some ice cream? I think you deserve it” 

Your eyes lit up, “yes please!” You beamed, “can I please get two scoops?” You asked, making your mothers chuckle. 

“I’m sure two scoops is perfect for our brave girl!” Wanda replied. 

“You may have as may scoops as you like, my love” Nat said, taking your backpack from you as you all reached the car. 

“You guys are the best!” You beamed, jumping into the car.

Your mothers smiled at one another, “we love you, darling” Wanda said, before helping you buckle your seatbelt. 

“I love you too!” You replied, sweetly.

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Roommate Vi✧ ˚ 　· 　　 .

Masterlist C.W. mentions of being drunk

Roommate Vi loudly plays her games in the middle of the night. It’s 2 am and she’s screaming at 14 year olds for getting her killed in Fortnite. “Dude! What the fuck! You were supposed to cover my ass!” Is all you hear, all night long, through the paper thin walls. When she gets too loud you’re throwing pillows at the wall. Her big ass headphones planted atop her head, denting her hair into the shape of them, tuning out the sounds of quiet thumps against her wall. You eventually have to go knock on her door to tell her to keep it down around 3 am. She has work in the morning, you can’t quite wrap your head around how she plays all night and still makes it in on time. Vi will apologize, embarrassment etching her features. Though she would be lying if she said she didn’t like seeing your frazzled state standing at her bedroom door every night. Cozied into your pajamas and a blanket wrapped around you, sheltering you from the cold. She keeps it cold as hell in the apartment. She runs naturally hot so you never complain, enjoying wearing the hoodies around the apartment and the old stained sweats you’ve owned since you were a teenager. They were more comfortable than the shorts that rode up or the tank tops you were always worried would move and flash her. She loved seeing your sleepy eyes and frizzy hair from all the tossing and turning trying to tune her out. She stays quiet for as long as she can, but she has a hard time controlling her volume when she’s angry or heavily enthused. Usually, she’ll get loud about an hour after you’ve scolded her, but that works for you. By that time you’re sound asleep.

Room mate Vi comes home drunk on the weekends after nights of bar hopping with her friends you still have yet to meet. Except in passing when they’re helping her get into the apartment. You’ll do a silent exchange of taking the load of Vi’s weight into your arms, nodding and a quiet thank you slipping through your mouth before they’re gone again. You’ll pull her into the room, wrecked from her getting ready earlier. Clothes thrown all over her bed and hair products splayed across her dresser. Moving the clothes to the side, you carefully help her into bed, she throws herself the rest of the way down and cackles loudly. “Woah! Hi Y/N! When did you get here? Or me? I missed you~” In a sing-song tone she’ll realize she made it home safe once again. She cracks her eyes open into slits to glimpse you taking her shoes off. Sighing loudly as you place the shoes on the ground, she huffs in annoyance. “What could you possibly be annoyed about, Vi? I’m helping you.” You say, frustration lacing your voice. You’re not mad that she’s come home like this again, she’s still young, that’s what she’s supposed to do at this age. Still worry swirls around your chest at the thought of her friends not being there one day, but deep down you know she’ll always make it out safe. She’s strong, even shit faced drunk. And to be honest, you never mind helping her after a night of drunken adventures. It warms your heart to know you can be there for her in such an intimate way, even if her drunken self always finds something to groan and pout about. She’ll continue sighing loudly until you sit next to her lying body on the bed. Stroking her hair until she settles, “I’m going to grab you water and some medicine for when you wake up, okay?” She groans once more and throws her arms around your waist, rapidly shaking her head, holding onto you until sleep finds her. You sneak out of her room and return with the hangover remedies, softly setting them down on the nightstand and quietly exiting the room, fearful you’ll wake her up.

In the morning, she’ll wake up in a haze, quickly take the medication and gulp down the water you left for her. She’ll stumble out of her bedroom, finding you in the kitchen making breakfast. “Fuck, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to get that drunk or make you take care of me.” She apologizes profusely, clambering over to the table to sit down, wincing at the way her head pounds harder when she sits down a bit too hard. “I never mind, Vi. You’ll feel better soon. Want breakfast?” You both sit in silence until after she finishes eating. Slowly she’ll feel better and then you’ll recount your night of babysitting her drunken persona. Secretly, she loves when you take care of her, drunken or not. And you love to be the one taking care of her. Love the feeling of being useful to her. 

Room mate Vi has a bad day at work like 70% of the time. You’re not sure why she still works there if she hates it, but she needs the money and you can understand that. She slams the door open and closes it a bit loud and viscous. Stomping to her room to scream into a pillow and punch her mattress out of anger. You hesitantly walk up to her door and knock lightly. You hear a quiet ‘come in.’ through the door and you slowly open the door and stand in the threshold. “You- What’s wrong?” Anxiety spreading through you. You’re never mad at her for getting as rough as she does when she’s mad. But, it still makes you feel uneasy. She exhales a breath of irritation. “Just a bad day. Work fucking kills me. The customers have to be having meetings in the mornings about how they’re all going to come in and ruin my day. Like they have to be. It’s insane.” You give her a look of sympathy and walk over to her desk chair. “I’m sorry. Tell me about it?” She’ll rant for an hour about how every customer was rude, obnoxious or stupid. Ending it feeling better about her day having gotten it out of her system. You truly make her feel at ease.

Room mate Vi and you reserve Sunday nights to hang out together. Usually cozying up in the living room, a shared blanket and too many snacks for one night, a movie playing on the TV. Every Sunday you trade off who gets to pick the movie. Vi usually picks an action movie or a romcom that she makes you promise not to tell anyone she enjoys. You taunt her with the threat of telling whatever friend that brings her home that week and she’ll tickle you until you can’t breathe and you’re promising over and over you won’t actually tell anyone. She settles back into her spot and gleams with triumph. Throughout the night you guys always find yourself moving closer to the other until you’re practically cuddling. Snuggled into her side and her arm thrown around the back of the couch, that’ll eventually get tired of being up there and trail down to being wrapped around your shoulders instead. You fall asleep like that and she gently scoops you up and brings you to your room. Tucking you into bed, she’ll push your hair back behind your ear and lean down, pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head. She tells herself it’s normal to feel the way she does with you. You’re friends after all. She walks out of your room and softly closes the door. She stands in front of your door for a minute and catches her breath, waiting for her heart to slow down back to its normal pace. She just likes being around you. Nothing more, you’re a good friend. She finds herself staring at you, often, yeah. Friends do that. Catching herself missing you when you walk away, and imagines kissing you, more than she probably should, it happens, it’s normal. Yeah, friends feel that way sometimes. Sure.

Room mate Vi who isn’t able to convince herself she doesn’t like you when you come home one day, giddy about a first date you have that night. She starts feeling a searing jealousy rising in her. She can’t push it away and she’s pouting all day long. Sending you off with just a “Yeah, have fun. Be safe.” when you’re leaving. It leaves you perplexed, her sudden coldness. She sits at home, brooding, the rest of the night until you’re home. When she sees the look of disappointment on your face, she feels her heart leap. She feels bad for finding joy in your disappointment, but she can’t help herself. “Are you okay? Date not go well?” She hears the eagerness in her voice and inwardly winces. You huff and trudge to the couch, throwing yourself on it. You lay across her lap and stare up the ceiling. She strokes your hair and raises her eyebrows. A soft ‘hm?’ sound leaves her throat. “It wasn’t bad, but there just wasn’t any chemistry. I feel bad. I was so excited but she was so bland. I almost feel like she did it on purpose to drive me away. Maybe she didn’t want to go out and was just being nice when she said yes… I don’t know.” you sigh in defeat and toss yourself around to shove your face into her lap, shading your face away from her. She exhales softly and clears her throat, unease setting in. “Maybe? I doubt it. I bet she was just boring. Who wouldn’t want to go on a date with you? You’re so pretty and funny.” You snort in amusement. Twisting around to face her again. “You’re just saying that because you have to. But, I appreciate it.” She stares at you in disbelief. “I’m not just saying that, babe. You are a catch, people should feel blessed to be in your company. Let alone in such an intimate way.” You stare at her, unable to convince yourself that she’s being real. “Thanks, Vi. I appreciate you. It was just disappointing, but my feelings aren’t hurt.” She nods in a solemn agreement. She swallows her anxiety and reaches over to grab your hand. You interlock fingers and smile down at your connected hands. “Go on a date with me. I’ll show you what a good time with someone who values you, should feel.” You choke on your spit when you hear her say that and sit up fast. “What? I-” you stare at her and she continues staring at you, confidence spilling out from her. “Come on. It’ll be fun.” She smiles mischievously. “Uh.. Okay. Fine. If you want to, you don’t have to do that just because you feel bad for me. That’ll make me feel worse.” You trail off and she shakes her head, chuckling lightly. “I mean it. I was going to ask you either way.” You laugh loudly and throw yourself back into her lap, covering your blushing face.

Room mate Vi plans the most thoughtful dates. A picnic with your favorite foods, stay at home movie night with a fort she made herself, though it looks janky and falls down a few times, surprise beach days. By the end of every date you share, your cheeks hurt from smiling so much, feeling like you did a thousand sit ups from the pain of laughing too much and butterflies making a home in your chest. She always makes you feel that deserving feeling she preached to you. With her it felt easy, it made sense. And you felt silly for not seeing it earlier. It felt obvious that you both would be a good match together, but yet it took you so long. And it took her asking you. What if she didn’t say anything? Would you be living your life going on mediocre dates until the end of time? Either way, you’re glad you don’t have to do that. Glad you have each other.

Girlfriend Vi adores you and never goes a day without telling you how pretty and smart you are. She loves to see you shy away from her, loves to see your coy smile. You continue your Sunday movie nights, but with more kisses and cuddling now. You go with her on the weekends to watch how she gets herself to that point of drunken-ness. But, you’re the one taking her home now, not just tucking her in. You’re cuddling into bed next to her now. Her warmth radiates off her, no need for blankets when you have her to warm up. You wake up to her head shoved into your chest, arms wrapped around you and legs locking you in place. She snores lightly, peacefully resting off her hangovers, hard work days or rough workouts. You kiss her on the top of her head and snuggle closer into her, closing your eyes to drift off into that same peaceful rest. Feeling thankful you’ll never have to live without her or her calming presence. Even when she’s mad.