#she has very mixed feelings about dorian lmao

[vigilskeep]

i kind of jumped to tell dorian about the meeting his father set, just because nennaia doesn’t really trust giselle and the magister even less, without thinking about whether her long parting with her own son would make her feel, prior to getting context, some kind of empathy with halward’s desire to reunite after something happened that was his fault. but i actually think it’s more insane for her to insist dorian has all the information first and immediately lean on the side of him not trusting or forgiving a parent. in a bit of a self-damning way where she would even want someone to do the same for her boy

[cringefaecompilation]

imogen, orym, and fcg!

imogen

First impression

oh she's cute, i love her hair and accent!

Impression now

Favorite moment

"my mama's here. i'm coming to visit her" top ten imogen quotes of all time to me

Idea for a story

god i want her to fucking rest. send her to a state fair and let her pet the fucking goats oh my god get the weight of everything off her shoulders

Unpopular opinion

imogen isn't a mean selfish bitch and her story isn't meant to end with her turning evil. she isn't abusive towards laudna nor does she refuse to see laudna has flaws. she doesn't hate orym or mock his trauma. she doesn't hate ashton and mock their trauma. why is this such a common theory/concept. i understand it's died down now that she's told ludinus to kill himself but i can't understand how so many people will joke about how keyleth was bashed for stupid reasons and then turn around and bash imogen for very similar stupid reasons, and when you point this out to them they'll whine about how you're "girlbossifying" her.

Favorite relationship

her and everyone in bh except for chet, dorian and braius. sorry guys. nothing you have done with her yet has jumped out at me as the rest.

Favorite headcanon

imogen likes hatch chiles. irony as she is cast

orym

First impression

ngl i thought he was one of the most boring characters in exu. not that he was a bad character, he just felt like he had barely anything going for him compared to the rest of the team and only existed to be the least weird out of them

Impression now

after finishing exu i went into c3 27 episodes in like "this is just beauregard if she was a guy and played by the rules instead of broke them. okay i like him now lmao" which morphed into "oh god you need someone to tell you to stop, you are going to die if you keep this momentum up." i like him but he needs severe help that isn't solely positive reinforcement

Favorite moment

him hugging imogen and telling her he's proud of her and cares for her and him apologizing for being so objective towards her and her mom.

Idea for a story

i wanna know how him and fearne met. please tell me she saved him from a monster or something, that'd be cute.

Unpopular opinion

as someone who has seen legitimate hatred and extreme bad faith criticism of orym, i don't like him being whiteknighted because he's biased in a "good" way. yes, he's objectively correct, but that doesn't account for him being so stubborn about it and i hate it when he's used against his friends.

also yeah it's increasingly obvious he self-harms and i don't like that it's either ignored or even encouraged by the fanbase.

Favorite relationship

every single platonic situationship orym has had with a woman has altered my brain chemistry in ways that scientists do not have a word for so yet thanks liam. (imogen, fearne, opal, laudna, keyleth)

Favorite headcanon

he's mixed and has ocd!

fcg

First impression

"but... why does the robot have a southern accent...?"

Impression now

gods bless you letters, you were taken from us too soon

Favorite moment

IS IT D OR IS IT DANCER for a silly bit, and who wouldn't say their speech and sacrifice to save the hells?

Idea for a story

i've had time to dwell on it and i really don't want them to be wholly revived or reincarnated at the end of the campaign because it'll feel weird, but i do want like, a dalen's closet moment where everyone gets to talk to them one last time.

Unpopular opinion

he should have gotten the shard. also i refuse to believe he should have gotten legs. let them keep their wheel, dammit.

Favorite relationship

him and ashton (cute) and fearne (many thoughts brain making whirring noises). loveletters didn't really do it for me, sorry.

Favorite headcanon

the flat exandria thing was a bit in-universe too. they see the hells talk about keeping up the theory in his honor as a ghost and keep trying to be like WAIT NO NO NO I WAS KIDDING from beyond the veil

[pearblossommina]

ToG Read-A-Long, Crown of Midnight, day 8

50

Wow!

Wow!

(The dog is okay! Thank god!)

If there’s one thing that could make me like Chaol again, it’s the fact that he stopped at nothing to dive into a hellish dimension to rescue Fleetfoot.

Obviously I need some more detail about fae and what they are and why humans might fear and hate them.

If we’re going by ACOTAR rules, faeries never seemed to be all that different from humans, and the fear just stems from a centuries old war that might have carried with it a prejudice through the generations.

We kind of got a glimpse of the wider world in this story, but we haven’t really encountered fae or tales of their wickedness yet. But Celaena herself calls it “the monster unleashed” or whatever, so maybe they are worse than ACOTAR faeries, or maybe, she’s just been hanging out with humans too long and has internalized that self hatred. But I think she stands a good chance of teaching the world that faeries are just like humans, especially since she was able to mask herself as one and build all these vital friendships.

I dunno

I just hope that they don’t all start to hate her for something she can’t control.

51

RIP ARCHER

you were awesome until you killed Nehemia. If you’re gonna come between me and my princess, you gotta go, I’m sorry.

Still rooting for the Celaena dark path, even if it’s not what Nehemia wanted. Sometimes the darkness is the light, smh

52

Okayyyy

So she’s a Demi-fae

Chaol is being pretty sweet about it, honestly

(This is a more emotional breakup than the one she had with Dorian)

I don’t like how he gets to decide what to do for her, though. Like maybe ask her first, before you promise your dad you’ll un-abdicate and go home?

53

Well I guess it’s decided. In the next book we go to Wendlyn. Even Elena told Celaena not to worry about Wyrdkeys, or about King Whatever.

I wonder if Wendlyn’s king and heir will get names or if they’re gonna be vague unnamed characters, too 😩

54

Dorian and Chaol are fighting again

Boys

Please

Give it a rest

Celaena is going to fight for the rebellion, a promise to her best and truest love of all time, Nehemia, who died so violently, and came back from the dead so peacefully, and then left again to give her all these mixed up emotions.

(I love you Nehemia!)

(I hope we see you again, someday!)

55

I can’t beleive she’s leaving without Fleetfoot! (😭)

We are lingering so much on this last day, lol

Another breakup scene with Chaol and Celaena

What did she whisper to him - I wonder?

56

So she was secretly Aelin Galathynius!!!!!!

I’m very excited

(Girl)

Does she even know? Or does she have to discover it herself?

I feel like she had so many parts where she was like no one knows what happened to her. No one knows if she’s even alive or dead…

(I was like, she’s alive, she’s important, she has a faerie boyfriend and I’ve seen lots of kinky fanart of him) (I didn’t seek it out lol)(I just like to look at sexy nsfw faeries and everybody who draws ACOTAR fanart also draws TOG fanart) (lol)

I literally thought these books were about faeries, lmao, I did not expect the bait and switch of book one and two. But I was thinking maybe we were in a Feyre’s book/Nesta’s book type of deal. I was like we have to get through this weird worldbuilding and SOON we will go to the faerie realm

I CANNOT WAIT

TO GO TO THE FAERIE REALM

LET’S GOOOOO

[falloutboywife]

i want to start this off by saying i am infintitely grateful for all the support i've gotten while i was away, and i cannot express enough how much it means to me to know i have so much support during such a frustrating part of my life, even if i'm only showing you guys one part of it. i cannot tell you enough how thankful i am, and i'm going to respond to as many messages as i can tomorrow because this has taken a lot of time and energy for me to write and piece together emotionally

i definitely think the other week when i made that lengthy post about my identity and my place in online spaces may have been a bit of an overreaction, however while i've had some time to think about it on my own i think that just avoiding tumblr outright is causing me to become pretty insular in how i'm perceiving the entire situation, which isn't made any easier for me considering when i ask my friends who've been seeing it unfold what their opinions on it are, their responses have been pretty mixed.

as a whole, i think that being in online fandoms, as an outspoken artist (outspoken in this sense meaning redacted and fat kid fuckery, both shameful and heretical topics few dare to mention), tends to inflate my ego in a way i don't really find desirable. meaning people who are super kind and friendly towards me and who give me a lot of positive attention, while reassuring and definitely welcomed, tends to lean into people admiring me for reasons i don't really understand, and this can also end up trapping me into a certain role to fulfill in a community because of the kind of attention i tend to reward and validate, i.e. fat kid fuckery in my dms, which leads to the expectation of me being this sort of bastion of hornyposting where all evil (affectionate) thoughts are encouraged and endorsed.

on the other end of the spectrum, and if you know what i'm talking about then you know, i tend to attract a lot of negativity from people i've never interacted with or had any intention of interacting with, and this has been an issue for me pretty much the entire time i've used social media (me adding hornyposting as a facet to my personality is really recent, like i only started doing this late 2017 and i'm really tired of it by now but. again. it's what people expect of me, more on that later), and i'm not entirely sure how to make it stop. granted, when i was a lot younger, i was genuinely an asshole, but i want to stress a very important thing i think very few of my followers on here are aware of

i'm 28 and only just now aware of the fact that i'm autistic, and i was misdiagnosed with bipolar when i was 13 and because none of the treatment or therapy worked, i always thought there was something really wrong with me, so i couldn't actually learn how to cope with a lot of my problems in a productive way until recently. so yeah, i was a jackass when i was younger, and i can be a jackass in private sometimes when i'm under a lot of stress, but having this realization about myself is really helping me a lot on its own

and being autistic, people can think i'm annoying or obnoxious or irritating and that, juxtaposed with content or opinions they might personally disagree with, can make people very angry just inherently. i've spoken with my friends about how i can't seem to shake off any drama that i really, really have nothing to do with or any interest in, and the only ones who could really relate were other autistic people. my own friend actually told me that she thinks this is something i'm just going to have to struggle with my entire life, because even if it's not being horny or advocating for sexual positivty, i'm ALWAYS doing something that will piss someone off

(quick disclaimer: i know some of you are probably going to try to engage in bad faith arguments with me saying that i'm calling all my haters ableist, and if anyone tries to insinuate that this is the conclusion i'm coming to, i'm not only ignoring your ask but blocking you as well. i'm also not answering any asks trying to insinuate that i "need help" simply because of the type of fiction i enjoy, when the issue was HOW i was engaging with it, which i think i have made exceedingly clear.)

i think it's funny that me clearly being into waycest and clearly being into babystump is lost on people to the point where they feel they need to make callout posts "warning" people about the fact that i'm...openly and unabashedly interested in this shit, but the very second i say "actually i'm asexual but i'm glad you guys are so sexually open about yourselves and your interests" i lost more followers than any active campaign trying to cancel me, which is exactly what i fucking mean when i say this is what people expect of me

so i can't really make anyone happy in the current environment i've curated for myself because it is expected of me to maintain this personality and continue engaging in this nature of content regardless of my own personal feelings on the matter, because if i want to break free from it then i risk pissing people off. i also can't just act how i want or make the kind of jokes that i want or enjoy the kind of things i want anyway because simply by having a mental disability that effects how i engage with people socially, i am risking ostracizing myself by pissing the wrong people off and ultimately making things a lot worse than they otherwise would be

however. However. even if this is exactly how i feel, this isn't entirely a situation that is exclusive to this current blog, and when i said in the beginning i was taking this too seriously, i still mean that, and i think that my own personal problems with being in online fandoms stem from external factors that have nothing to do with this website. i'm almost 30 and a lot of my life this past decade has been very stagnant due to severe depression, with no real progress towards furthering my life in any meaningful way, and i think that what i was really frustrated with when i made that post was this very factor. in conjunction with this, i use online spaces a way to try to find an open and accepting community of people i can befriend and be myself in, because my undiagnosed autism has historically made it difficult for me to really socialize with people in a productive way that didn't make me feel like an outcast. i think a combination of the fact that online spaces are becoming increasingly more difficult for me to adapt to, as well as incresingly unfulfilling, adding to the lack of fulfillment in the rest of my life, was the subconscious realization i came to when i decided to make that post and take a break from tumblr for a bit. i'm frustrated that i have no fulfillment in my life, and i can no longer find it in online spaces that i used to enjoy and find so much meaning in

this being said, i'm actually doing shit with my life at long last. i'm enrolled in classes for an english degree, and i'm going to subsequently get an associates in creative writing that i'll be able to complete in a single semester after the fact, leaving me with two whole degrees under my belt that i can use in developing my future in the literary world. i'm taking my art more seriously as well, although i only post my bandom and lotr drawings on here, and i'm thinking of making an instagram account to start posting my art on there as well, as a sort of portfolio. i'm sick of this ongoing feeling of there being no meaning in my life, and i'm sick of feeling like i'm just wasting away and putting my mind to no use, and the immense joy i got just from seeing my class schedule for the fall semester made me realize that i am an intellectual, i'm an academic, and i'm in love with media and literary studies and this is what i find meaning in. this shit makes me so fucking happy and when i finished the picture of dorian gray the other day i IMMEDIATELY went on a tirade about its themes and symbolism just to myself and that, alone, was so fucking rewarding. i've been watching movies with my friend sweaterangst and just describing the themes of the horror used in the fucking texas chainsaw massacre movies made me feel so fulfilled even if he might have barely been listening LMAO i find meaning in seeking out complex and thought-provoking pieces of work and i

absolutely

am not getting that being on tumblr and talking about how i'm gonna let the fat kid deepfry me at the state fair (affectionate) (delusional) (severe)

with that being said, yes, i'm still asexual and i don't get fulfillment from purely sexual discussion, but i think i'm still gonna be answering asks about the sexy stuff so long as i find it engaging to a degree. i'm gonna start trying to use the guys you say as creative writing exercises because in the beginning that's what the fucking smut started as LMAO but i lost the plot a while ago and just let myself stagnate, like i said. i'm still gonna blog about bandom stuff but now that i have no reason to treat social media like it's all i have, and now that i'm breaking out of my depressed state in more meaningful ways, i think i'm gonna start blogging about a lot more things too and try to start having fun on this site again.

five nights at fat kid's is back, baby

[mrs-theirin]

I’m writing a story about my warden Ronya joining the Inquisition with her boyfriend Zev and it got me thinking about my Hawke meeting my her during the events of Here Lies The Abyss and how well they’d undoubtedly get along! Have all your characters ever met? Do they get along? Also I can’t resist asking about Eden and Varric because I just wrote a sweet reunion scene between my Hawke and her best bud Varric and it made me think how extra sweet such a scene would be for Varricmancers! How does Eden feel about Varric taking up with the inquisition? On a scale from 1 to me hearing Varric’s voice in the da4 trailer and SOBBING how excited is she to see him when she arrives at Skyhold? Does she make any friends in the inquisition?

anon i am literally vibrating it is like you are injecting pure serotonin directly into my body

have your characters ever met? whoo boy okay. so for this one i’m gonna lay out all my ocs because you have opened this can of worms and i am not letting you close it

1st canon: faye cousland (warden-commander), eden hawke, ashariani lavellan

2nd canon: faye cousland (queen), eden hawke, noelle & perseus trevelyan (twins)

3rd canon: ariadne amell, eden hawke (LMAOOOO i cannot let her go), elias hawke

4th canon: elora mahariel & freya aeducan, varian hawke, athena lavellan

SO. faye and eden have met in both canons, they vaguely knew each other in lothering, but became better friends later when carver joined the wardens. they get along, but they’re not super best friends. eden loves ashariani, sees her as a little sister/daughter, especially considering ashariani has a father/daughter relationship with varric. faye loves ashariani as well, though they don’t spend much time together until after inquisition. faye invites noelle and percy to a private ball for their efforts with the inquisition. eden....hehoo okay so.

eden hates percy <3 as does everyone else. he is not a nice man. but NOELLE. well. eden gets along with noelle......so much so, that she, varric, noelle, and bull eventually become a polycule. eden and noelle find interest in each other SUPER fast, and at that point, noelle is in a non-committal relationship with bull, so he doesn’t mind. varric takes a minute to adjust, but he’s cool with it. their relationship does get a little complicated though, so hold on:

eden & noelle are dating. eden & varric are married. noelle & bull are dating/will marry. eden & bull are dating. noelle & varric are not dating. varric & bull are not dating. (noelle and varric have quiet moments with each other, but don’t feel any particularly strong romantic feelings towards one another. varric and bull are just very close friends whose wives/girlfriends happen to be dating each other LMAO)

ariadne and eden obviously know each other, they’re cousins, and pretty similar in attitude. they were best friends before ariadne was taken to the circle. same thing with elias akldhdnfsgdl she’s his cousin, though they weren’t as close. eden and elias’s relationship is. complicated. but they love each other very much. i got another ask inquiring about elias, so i’ll explain their relationship in that ask <3

elora and freya are married by the end of origins. varian knows vaguely about them through anders telling her stories about them. varian and athena are gently acquainted, but not super close. athena is not a “super close” type of person

how does eden feel about varric taking up with the inquisition? okay so VERY mixed emotions. he tells her pretty much from the start (they regularly send letters). for one, she feels scared. from what she hears of cassandra, she doesn’t sound like someone eden wants around varric, and she doesn’t like that. she also doesn’t like him being in danger without her around. on the other hand, she’s happy to hear he’s getting along with people, especially the inquisitors. she’s happy he has a home

how excited is she to see varric at skyhold? (okay first, that scale made me laugh out loud. me too man....me too. i listen to that trailer every other week) she’s VERY excited!!! she can hear his voice through his letters, but she’s beyond excited when she knows she can hear it in person again, that they’ll be able to slide back into their regular back-and-forth banter, without letters separating how quick they’d be in person. mainly she’s just really happy to be with someone familiar again, especially if that someone familiar is the love of her life

does she make any friends in the inquisition? boy DOES SHE. cole, dorian, and iron bull are in her favorites. sera, josephine, and the chargers are a close second, while the others, in order from “likes the most” to “despises” are: leliana, vivienne, cassandra, blackwall, solas, cullen. she absolutely ADORES dorian, they become close friends REALLY quickly, mostly by teasing varric. in every other canon, eden and bull are just close friends, but in that second canon they do eventually end up together. she will protect cole with her life, she absolutely loves that kid

[lotuslia]

Day 18: Companions

This is a long one, so under cut.

Varric was the first proper friend he made in Haven, Astra had heard of him through his books beforehand, (Tale of the Champion is his favorite), and Varric ended up tugged into regular morning-tea/coffee-talks since this elven asshole wakes up at the brink of dawn and likes to tell and hear stories a lot.

Solas was another early friend, though there was more friction there because of his comments of dislike towards the dalish, and Astra being stubbornly and loudly dalish in return. Astra respects the man, and they grow to be close friends until Trespasser, when he feels betrayed by their conversation at the end.

With Cassandra they started rough, pretty much hating each other's guts, due to starting off the wrong foot. They never quite become as friendly as with many others, but they talk things out and grow to respect each other, knowing they can rely on each other despite their disagreements. (In fic-canon his brother courts her and Astra's VERY conflicted about it)

He worries about bringing Sera into the inquisition, since it seemed like she was joining on a whim. He feels responsible for her. They start off a bit uncertain with differing opinions on elves, but otherwise their views match pretty well. They have a fight after the temple of Mythal, but otherwise they're close friends. (in fic-canon his sister dates her, and Andri's presence in the conversation balances that fight out so it's not an end-it-all to their friendship.)

Cole is also in the 'feels responsible for' area, though Astra is also fascinated by having a spirit in their midst. He treats the boy carefully, but listens to him intently, like both a younger charge and a more experienced teacher. It's a bit mixed, he's not sure which way he sees Cole in the end.

Iron Bull and especially the Chargers, they're his absolute best friends. When Astra wants to step away from the inquisition for just a moment, he goes with them, and has a few hours of time off just having fun and talking.

Dorian is going to get a bigger part in the next entry, but they're dating. They're so close, and so cheesy.

Blackwall begins as a distant but respected ally (in fic-canon, he makes toys for Astra's daughter and they're friends through that lmao), and then once his reveal happens, Astra is disappointed and has trouble trusting him once more, but he has high hopes for Blackwall's redeeming later on.

He's a bit intimidated about Vivienne, mostly because he doesn't know how to act around human courts. But they have a pretty steady friendship going on. It's not without its conflicts, what with Astra being against circles, but they get along and he goes to her when he needs help with court-related issues, or other advice.

With the advisors: Leliana is a friend but he's a bit wary sometimes. Josephine is a close friend. And Cullen he's a bit nervous around, because of the templar thing, but otherwise they get along civilly.

Link to the template: here

[aelinbitch-archive]

You've probably said this before but what's your favorite aspect of the TOG series? I've only read like ten pages of the first book lol

aaaaa thank u for asking!! this sort of leads into something i’ve been meaning to talk about for a while so i hope you’re prepared for An Essay No One Wanted By Me. anyway this is a two-part answer, read below:

1. Aelin. Celaena. The main bitch, whatever you wanna call her lol. Without her I probably wouldn’t have cared about the series at all and wouldn’t currently be trapped in ToG tumblr hell reluctantly stanning a racist and homophobic series, but unfortunately when I was like twelve years old or whatever and read the first book I literally imprinted on Celaena like a baby duckling. To the extent that she became, like, the default avatar for all my maladaptive daydreaming and If I Don’t Project On Her At All Times I Will Die. It’s not like she’s the only thing I like about the series (I loooove a lot of the other characters, especially the gals, and the writing can be really great and engaging and cinematic) but Aelin has always been the supermassive black hole at the center of it all for me. I wouldn’t know how to even begin untangling her character from my psyche at this point. It’s honestly a little disturbing. Anyway. 

2. Part two is a quality of the series that I feel was unprecedented in its strength in the first five books of the series (ToG-QoS plus the prequel novellas) and really really disappointingly weak in the last two books (EoS-KoA). Like I said above, Aelin has always been my main interest in tog so I read and enjoyed the last two anyway, but I definitely felt the loss of this - “this” being the detail and attention paid to all different types of relationships between characters, and how rich and unpredictable those relationships were as a result. 

That sounds like kind of a broad, vague thing, but what I mean is that (in my opinion) rarely are romances and friendships and rivalries explored with such nuance, complexity, drama, and realism in most YA as they are in ToG. I remember reading Cassandra Clare’s books (lmao.) as a pre teen and loving those as well, but totally being able to predict who was going to end up with who, and finding the character dynamics to be pretty cut and dry. 

In ToG that’s not the case at all. Like, you’ve got Celaena and Sam, a really complex example of enemies to lovers to….. Tragically Dead Boyfriend Whose Demise Fuels My Guilt and Self-Hatred For Seven More Books, Lysandra and Aelin, two girls pitted against each other by their abuser who team up a year later to unlearn their internalized misogyny and kill him, and Aelin and Chaol, who… how do I even describe the ups and downs (and downs. and more downs) of their relationship. 

And that’s just three pairs! Pull the names of two characters out of a hat and I can almost guarantee essays worth of material could be written about them. Arobynn and Aelin? Aelin and Nehemia? Chaol and Dorian, as much as I hate both of them and feel that their relationship as been widely mischaracterized? All fascinating!!! No two people in those first few books are just friends, or just lovers, or just enemies. It’s always more complex, there’s always a history or tension or competing agendas or viewpoints that Fuck Shit Up. 

And benefit of that is twofold: one, everything that happens between the characters just…. lands so well. The betrayals and triumphs and losses and victories of The Assassin’s Blade and Crown of Midnight and Queen of Shadows (especially TAB) are fucking heart-stopping. It’s great character-driven entertainment!! Gripping and engaging and vivid to the point of being painful. 

And two, there’s no way to predict where a relationship is going to go. Aelin and Lysandra teaming up in QoS instead of returning to their rivalry? Who would have thought! Ansel and Celaena’s summer fling (they were in love. fight me.) ending like That? Holy fuck. Nesryn and Chaol breaking up in ToD? Oh shit! I fell for it again! Rowan and Aelin ending up together after everyone swore they were brotp in HoF? Hell yeah! Chaolaena seeming like endgame and then ending forever, with Chaol and Aelin realizing that the rift between them that began in CoM was something that would never sufficiently heal? Unprecedented. Fucking badass for a YA book to curve everyone like that. Tween me was shook out of her mind. 

(Important to note, though, that the downside of this style was that SJM couldn’t tell where ~unpredictable relationships and characters~ ended and fridging began, and as a result, not one but two woc were killed off to make white characters sad and it sucked beyond belief). 

Aaaaaand then QoS, the peak of literature, turned into EoS, and SJM just… gave up on all of that. I remember the first time Dorian and Manon met, and I was like oh, okay. So they’re going to end up together. And I was right. I remember that on this site, before EoS came out, before Lorcan and Elide ever fucking MET, people predicted the existence of Elorcan!! And they were right!! Like how fucking boring? Everyone is just paired off into completely predictable heterosexual ships and those are now the only relationships we get to read about (with a few exceptions, like Aelin/Aedion, Aelin/Fenrys, etc.). 

I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again: my least favorite thing about Manorian is not that I find the relationship to be shitty (although I do, I really do). It’s that Dorian is suddenly the only character Manon gets to interact with in any meaningful way. 

Like, are you kidding?! I want to read about Manon and Elide, Manon and Asterin, Rowan and Lorcan, Aelin and Lysandra, Aelin and Nesyrn, even if it’s not romantically (although some of them, like Manon and Elide, absolutely should have been, and the fact that not only was that ship very thoroughly sunk, but also they didn’t even get to TALK after QoS, felt like a real slap in the face to gay fans, but I digress), because those pairings previously had hella complexity and drama. But we don’t get to. 

And this trend that’s so painfully present in the last two books Sucks for two reasons: one, every relationship that isn’t romantic (which were previously some of the most interesting ones) is abandoned so that more time can be made for The Hets™ and two, the relationships that are romantic, now the only ones left, are totally fucking boring and predictable!! If two characters are interacting at any point (if one is male and the other is female, of course) then you know for a fact that they’re not only love interests, but endgame. 

And that makes me not care even when there is drama between them. Elide giving Lorcan the cold-shoulder for three hundred pages, and Manon and Dorian arguing, and Aedion being cruel to Lysandra weren’t compelling narratives to me like they should have been, because the whole time I was just thinking “but it doesn’t matter. I know it’s still endgame. There are no stakes here whatsoever; it’s a done deal.” Whereas Chaol and Celaena’s devestating breakup in CoM felt like (and was) suuuuper Real. An all-in bet on the wrong person. Crazy shit. 

And not that I think two characters should never have a happy ending together (I really like rowaelin and nestaq and I would have loved malide!) but imagine how much cooler and subversive and entertaining it would have been if Elorcan, which seemed soooo totally cute and endgamey and borderline like fanfiction throughout all of EoS just ended forever right there and then on the beach, with Elide turning to Lorcan and saying “I hope you spend the rest of your miserable, immortal life suffering. I hope you spend it alone. I hope you live with regret and guilt in your heart and never find a way to endure it” - and BAM. She never speaks to him again. He’s dead to her. 

I mean, talk about shock value! (See, Sarah, you can have shock value without killing of a person of color to make a white character sad 🙃). And I totally get that relational twists like that alienate fans more than just going the expected route and having them kiss and make-up does (I mean, the ending of Chaolaena in QoS certainly did, Jesus Christ) but I, Bella aelinbitch, personally live for that shit, and isn’t it only fair that all media cater directly and specifically to me? Lmao. But seriously, I do think it’s objectively more interesting, and that it keeps readers on their toes (I was on my ASS in EoS and KoA. Like. I was flat on my back sinking into the Earth). 

And there are still sort of… glimmers of the old way she wrote in the first few books, but it just feels like a tease rather than something that’s really explored and indulged in the way it was before, and it just ends up being more frustrating (like what was the point of Manon and Dorian not getting married at the end of KoA if I would bet my life savings that in World of Tog it’ll be confirmed that they’re either married or still together) and sometimes downright problematic? Like to return to a previous example, I think all the drama between Aedion + Lysandra was a result of Sarah’s previous (good) instincts to shake stuff up and complicate the character dynamics, but it backfires because when they end up together, it’s not ever… worked out? Or addressed? If you create really intense drama between two people, then that needs to show up in their relationship, no matter how happy they end up together. It doesn’t just disappear.

And despite the fact that her understanding of that concept (that shit between two people doesn’t just disappear like magic) is one of my absolute favorite things about the first few books, Sarah even went as far as to use the last two books to retcon some of the original complexity away, which makes me want to rip out my hair!! Like Aelin at the end of KoA just going “Love you Chaol and Love you Dorian xoxoxoxoxox best friends forever!!!” instead of having, like, any type of mixed feelings about the way these boys treated her? I mean, come on! 100 pages earlier Chaol was openly saying she should die instead of Dorian! Why is everything just peachy-keen instead of fraught with tension!! (I know why. I know. It’s because she introduced way too many characters/POVs/storylines as the series went on and didn’t know what to do with them all besides sideline the nonromantic ones and pair off everyone else boy-girl boy-girl down the line). Or if it has to be peachy-keen, why is the peachy-keeness never critically examined as, perhaps, a repressive mechanism for Aelin to avoid dealing with painful truths from her past? Now that would be interesting. 

(My ideal World of ToG would be just a transcript of the characters’ therapy sessions where Aelin realizes that her insistence that “Chaol and Dorian Are Her Friends!” is actually a way to keep herself safe emotionally and that she has plenty of reasons to hate them, and Lysandra realizes she should divorce Aedion lmao).  

Anyway tldr: The variety, complexity, depth, and unpredictability of the relationships in Throne of Glass was simultaneously the most realistic (sometimes relationships of all kinds fall apart or veer off in unexpected directions and love is temporary and the boy you met in the first chapter isn’t actually your soulmate and it doesn’t mean he’s a villain) and the most gripping and dramatic (I would have been totally chill if maeve and erawan weren’t a thing and tog was just like a medieval soap opera, that’s how entertaining the character dynamics were) thing about the series, and to lose that in the last two books because of Heterosexuality (and introducing too many POVs and not knowing what to do with them all)…. kinda devastating. 

This ended up being waaaaaay more complaining than it was talking about what I loved, but the only reason it bothers me so much is because it used to be so good!!! So just imagine the inverse of all the frustration I just vomited into this ask and you’ll have a good idea of how much I loved the series when things weren’t this way.

[bitchesofostwick]

oc meme info: ellinor trevelyan

thank you for the tag, @veridium-bye​!! i’ll tag @a-shakespearean-in-paris​ @gingerbreton​ @occorner​ @trvelyans​ @dickeybbqpit​ @mocha-writes​ @ladymdc​

BASICS

full name: ellinor aria trevelyan

gender: woman

sexuality: straight

family: ellinor is the youngest daugher of bann jaime trevelyan and rosalind treveylan. she has a twin brother, avery, and three older sisters, bryony, lyssa, and reilly.

pronouns: she/her

OTHER

birthplace: ostwick, born 9:15 dragon

job(s): she was more or less expected to become a socialite like her sisters, lyssa and reilly (because she definitely wasn’t going to follow bryony and become a templar). pre-inquisition, she spent her time idly, either being courted, playing harp during chantry sermons, or riding her horse, whinny. so the inquisition was definitely a step up lol.

phobias: they’re more fears than phobias, but she’s afraid of rodents or rodent-like creatures (sorry, nugs), as well as mabari, at least until she has time to warm up to them.

guilty pleasures: drinking and dancing at the herald’s rest. she’s a bit of a lightweight and can get carried away if no one’s keeping an eye on her.

hobbies: reading, horseback riding, dancing (as mentioned). she’s also skilled at the harp and asks maryden for lute lessons once they reach skyhold.

MORALS

morality alignment: lawful neutral/good. she has a strong moral compass and sticks to it, but whether her choices are truly “good” or maybe selfish could be left up to interpretation.

bad qualities: she’s very slow to trust and slow to forgive. she tends to make very quick first impressions of people and let those define her impression of them for a very long time, sometimes unfairly. she’s strong-willed and can be narrow-minded, sometimes not wishing to listen to those who oppose her.

good qualities: confident, eloquent, will stay very calm under pressure. when she does come to trust someone, she will love them with her whole heart. she is fiercely protective of those who are her friends.

THIS OR THAT?

introvert / extrovert

organized / disorganized

close-minded / open-minded

calm / anxious / restless

disagreeable / agreeable / in between

cautious / reckless / in between

patient / impatient

outspoken / reserved

leader / follower / flexible

empathetic / unempathetic

optimistic / pessimistic / realistic (a mix of both)

traditional / modern / in between

hard-working / lazy / unmotivated

RELATIONSHIPS:

OTP: ellinor x cullen (or as i sometimes think to myself, “cullinor”). they are complete opposites and enemies when they first meet. it has a lot to do with first impressions--ellinor wants nothing to do with a templar and cullen looks at her as an incapable noblewoman. they end up being exactly what the other needs: cullen provides ellinor a sense of stability and support that she never received from her own family, and ellinor gives cullen the determination and strength he needs to atone and to recover.

acceptable ships: kinda rylen because she loves a man who can get his hands dirty to get the job done (and that just screams rylen ok??? also might have a headcanon that while she’s running away from her cullen feelings, she might get a little flirty with rylen and maybe he gives her a tattoo but then he’s like lass i’m not the one for you and then she goes back to cullen idk) buuuuuuuut no one else ahahaha oops. i mentioned in a recent ask post that the only other person who shares the qualities she comes to love in cullen (personal growth, desire to atone for past, dedication, etc.) would be blackwall, but she sees him more as a father/uncle figure and it would be weird to ship them.

OT3: none

BroTP: ellinor + josie, ellinor + sera, and ellinor + dorian

NOTP: besides ellinor x blackwall, for reasons already stated? ellinor x solas. she has a lot of respect for his knowledge, but she’s very outspoken and narrow-minded about some things and doesn’t always have the patience to take his advice or to learn about matters that seem faraway to her. also, you know. solas only wants that good good lavellan love. no room for trevelyans in his heart lmao

[bisexualryder]

How well does Olivia get along with her advisors and companions? Dorian and Solas not so much apparently, but how about the others?

That’s definitely a loaded, mixed-bag question! And I’m grateful you asked ❤️ Playing again with her has made me realize, and remember, things aren’t wholly what I thought they might be when I was planning her out.

Also… uhhh, putting a cut halfway thru cause this got long.

Case and point on that is Sera. They have this playful relationship that’s friendly and flirty, but also gets quite strained at times. Olivia’s faith and her strong belief in the templars is a huge problem with Sera. The strain gets a bit much for Olivia and she begins to distance herself to cut out the complication.

Cole is another interesting one. Olivia is so very torn about Cole. In her heart she knows he wants to help, that he is helping and did help her with Envy. But everything she’s learned in her life as a templar has taught her to fear what he is, to cast away (if not kill) what the Chantry has told her is a demon. It’s her compassionate side that allows Cole to stay, but the wary templar in her keeps him at a distance.

Cullen she knew before the Inquisition. He was her superior in Kirkwall and while they didn’t know each other well, they ended up bonding in Haven about shared experiences there and talking about what brought them to the templars, etc. By the time she becomes Inquisitor, their friendship has grown into “bff” territory. They argue like siblings, on occasion, not always seeing eye to eye, but they’re always supportive of each other.

With Leliana it’s friendly professional? Olivia would like to know her and be closer, but after she catches Leliana in her moment of weakness in Haven it quickly becomes an uphill battle. She also manages, though not entirely intentionally, to send off mixed signals? Like, her attitude toward a lot of things, and how she views the world and what they’re doing ends up translating to Leliana closing herself off more and going colder. Leliana’s want/need to be more effective for what the Inquisitor ultimately requires of her closing off that door Olivia hoped to pass through some day.

On the flip side, we have Josephine, who Olivia admires. While unsure of someone so adept at the Game and keen on politics at first, Olivia doesn’t take too long to warm up to Josie. She also develops quite the crush on her, but oh Maker is Olivia bad at flirting. And we all know Josie isn’t the best at picking up on those flirty signals to begin with. As much as Olivia wishes it, that avenue ends up going nowhere, but they do become pretty good friends.

Other than Cullen, probably one of her closest friends is Vivienne. Having only experienced life as a templar in Kirkwall, Olivia’s keen to learn everything she can about Vivienne’s experience. That curiosity leads to many evening discussions between them about how both the Circle and the Order should be and how that change could be implemented. Vivienne is also the one, along with Josie, that helps keep Olivia… presentable to the masses. The outfit she wears in her downtime was a gift from Vivienne, and she even has special armor commissioned just for Olivia once she becomes Inquisitor.

And we, of course, know that Solas and Dorian definitely dislike Olivia - and she them. After a bit of time passes, she and Dorian come to tolerate each other. But it never passes more the chilly professionalism stage between them. He’s there to help and she appreciates that, for the sake of saving the world, but also struggles to look past both the man of Tevinter and the mage. With Solas they just disagree on every fundamental level. She also despises his holier-than-thou arrogance (as she sees it) and takes every opportunity to make sarcastic jabs at him and, whenever possible, prove him wrong.

With Bull, Olivia is wary. They’re generally friendly, but she tries to keep her distance from him. The idea that he’s a spy, even that he willingly shared this information, puts her ill at ease. After the issues with the qunari in Kirkwall, she’s more than a little gun shy, as it were, when it comes to dealing with the Qun. She’s friendly with Krem as well, and has no issues with the Chargers on a whole, just doesn’t spend much time around them. And Krem is usually around when she’s interacting with Bull, acting as a bit of a buffer sometimes to ensure things stay friendly.

At first, Blackwall cannot stand Olivia. He thinks she’s arrogant, can’t see past her own faith, and is too stubborn to accept dissent from others when they disagree with her on whether it was truly divine intervention that saved her at the Conclave. She proves him wrong, however. Helping everyone she can in the Hinterlands, he realizes that she’s not just focused on closing the Breach by “whatever means”. Also when he watches her interact with non-rebel mages (aka those that don’t attack them on site), he realizes she’s not just another templar. And also maybe most importantly she expresses an interest in learning about him, beyond just being a warden, and he realizes she sees him as a man and not a tool. I’ll have to revisit how things go after the… reveal. Not sure I can judge right off hand how that’ll go tbh. She’s been growing more as I’ve been playing her beyond how I planned her out.

Uhh, let’s see, I think that leaves Cassandra and Varric. They’re… interesting ones. Cassandra she mostly gets along with, but sometimes they’re so much alike that Olivia gets… hm, not bored but… I can’t put my finger on the word I want. At any rate, for as much as they can be alike, they also disagree. Or well, mostly when it comes to the purpose of the Inquisition and what can be done with it. Olivia feels Cass looks too much to the past, and even hates when Cass goes off about being among the “few women that have shaped the world”. Olivia wants to be her own person, but also realizes that Cass isn’t really wrong about that and that bothers her. Also Cass totally gets Olivia reading Varric’s books and it’s dreadful for poor Varric.

And speaking of, Olivia and Varric have a tense relationship. He’s much in the same boat as Blackwall was at the start, but doesn’t offer Olivia as much opportunity to… “right” that viewpoint. Not that she particularly tries with him. Like many others, she appreciates that he’s there to help, but they simply disagree about how to go about things and how she wound up where she is. He also may or may not hold past prejudices for her being not simply a templar, but one of Meredith’s. He sees her and fears the chance that red lyrium could somehow wrap itself around her, to steal away their once chance at saving the world.

Bonus round!

I need to think it out a bit more, but Olivia has a good chance of romancing Dagna :3 And along that line, she actually gets along quite well with Harritt and enjoys learning about crafting arms and armour from him.

She also befriends Adan and always goes to him when she needs to resupply on her personal lyrium stores. She usually hangs around for a bit, lending a friendly ear for him to bounce ideas for new recipes off of. He knows she’s bored to death by it, but the fact that she even tries warms his heart. But hell if he’ll ever tell her that. 

And lastly Ashley Hawke. They are a bit unsure of each other at first. Ashley thinks Olivia looks vaguely familiar and the fact of the matter is they probably ran into each other once or twice in Kirkwall, but never much interacted. They end up getting along decently enough - friendly, for sure. More than Varric expected, if one were to ask him about it. They end up enjoying laughs about stories from Kirkwall and Ash enjoys telling stories of growing up in Ferelden. Annnd they do also 100% bang once before going to Crestwood. No strings attached and while Olivia can’t help but feel that extra flutter in her chest later on when talking to Ash or hearing about her, nothing ever happens beyond that. They remain friendly for as long as Ash hangs around to aide the Inquisition.

SO THERE YA GO. I’m sure at some point some of this may all change, lmao, she’s ever shifting but this was fun to answer! And I apologize it took me so long, I was noodling through it while at work (and also just didn’t get a chance to sit and work on it till well after getting home). And also that it’s so damn long lmao.

[avaquet]

Alright, all the 4s for Evelyn!

Thank you! lmao I finally got around to this, under the cut cause it’s semi long

4A: What things are they bad at?She’s definitely not good at baking, like at all. Even though she thinks sword fighting is kickass at times, she’s pretty bad at it herself (good thing she’s a mage lol). Along those lines would also be archery. She’s pretty bad at dancing with a partner at the beginning, she’s okay now, but not like great at it lol. She’s also not very good at taking care of plants, she has a hard time reading what they need. And of course many more things but those are just at the top of my head rn

4B: How old are they?At the beginning of 9:41, she’s 21. Though she turns 22 that year.

4C: What is their major comfort food? Why?Fruits! Mostly because she’s utterly convinced herself that it will quell panic, or fix her upset stomach, which may have some truth to it, but not as much as she puts on to it.Though I guess it’s technically true to her? It’s a placebo, but hey it works /shrug

4D: What type of clothes and accessories do they wear?What we would describe as peasant-wear, like peasant blouses and such, the slightly over-sized, roomy, ruffled clothes. She also loves lace. Depending on her mood she could go for more of a fitted piece, especially if she’s particularly feeling good about herself that day. She adores hair accessories (hair clips, pins, bows, flowers, things to add to her braids, etc) and body jewelry, like the draped chains, she likes the feel of it.

4E: Are they up-to-date on their internet fads?I imagine she’s more like a second lag behind? Like she will hear about things after they’ve blown up and started to die off/being overdone.

4F: Can they have fun while conforming to the rules?All the time. In fact she’s usually extremely nervous about breaking the smallest of rules. There are exceptions of course but most of the time she does conform.

4G: What parts of them do they like and dislike?(I assume we’re talking physical features here) She’s actually really fond of her waist and hair. Well besides the color, she wants white/grey/silver hair. She’s been self conscious about her scars, and she heavily regretted when she impulsively cut off her hair at the start of the inquisition. She’s had times where she wished her assets were a bit bigger, those thoughts though are more easily quelled.

4H: Do they have a favorite summer activity?Swimming. She’s actually not fond of summer in general.

4I: Would/was their family be okay with them being LGBT?She’s pansexual, and yes, the people in her clan were completely okay with that.

4J: Are they happy often?Well, she’s optimistic often, but not like happy-happy often. Content is more like it, though she struggles a lot with internal conflict.

4K: Who would miss them if they died?Her clan, the inner circle of the Inquisition. Though I think the top people most affected would be: Her father, keeper, childhood friends, Bull, Veil, Dorian, and Vivienne.

4L: Do they have any food intolerances?She’s not allergic to any food, but she can’t handle spicy very well at all and she hasn’t built up like any tolerance to alcohol so, lol

4M: What would they name a son? What would they name a daughter?She wouldn’t have kids. And if she would, they’d be adopted already with a name. (She’s not very creative when it comes to names. Her mind turns a blank)

4N: What is the most embarrassing thing they’ve done?Once, she lost a bet and had to “frolic through the fields of flowers singing a song in a high and out of tune pitch” her face was beat red and hot afterwards.

4O: Is there anyone in their life that throws optimism on them?Well, when she’s deep into her internal conflict and can’t escape the irrational pessimistic thoughts, her father, keeper, Veil, and Bull are the ones that help her out of it.

4P: What of their personality do others envy?I don’t know if people really envy her for this? But she’s heavily empathetic and in turn seems really selfless. Though she cares too much a lot and it ends up hurting her a lot in the end.

4Q: Do they ask weird questions?In schooling she did. Socially, not really, unless it’s to throw off her friends.

4R: Have they ever broken any rules they now regret breaking?Ev isn’t really a rule breaker to begin with. And she was actually very obedient growing up, though her father was more lax than most parents, she still never like did anything.

4S: Has anything happened to them on the streets?Not really. She’s been catcalled a few times and had slurs thrown against her in a few cities/towns while she was about.

4T: Have they lied about anything they regret lying about?She’s actually lied to herself quite often. The voice she calls the gnat tells her she doesn’t deserve happiness or love or cuddles or sympathy, the voice that tells her she’s not trying hard enough and that she has no right to complain and she’s being lazy when taking a break. Those are the things she always regrets believing, which in turn sends her down a spiral of negative and harsh thoughts from the gnat voice, blaming her that she’s fallen for it and because of it she deserves it. In turn, also regrets telling people she’s close to that she’s fine because she doesn’t want to burden them.

4U: Have they ever been doubted?Oh, many times by many people for a variety of different things.

4V: What do they like as far as comfort goes?This was under the vomit section of the asks so I’m assuming comfort when sick. She doesn’t like to be alone, but fully understands people avoiding her when she is sick, and sometimes feels bad for not wanting to be alone because she doesn’t want to get her friends sick. But in truth, she just likes the company of someone who cares and can make her laugh.

4W: Can they dive?Nope! She can definitely do cannonballs and flops though, lmao

4X: Can they sing well?Yes, actually. Her style is a mix of showy/operatic. She used to sing to the halla at the clan.

4Y: Do you enjoy writing them more than other characters?Very much so, yes.

4Z: What’s their dream pet?Though she know better than to make it a full reality, she thinks having a dragon friend/ally is kick ass.

[thewildmother]

2, 7, 11, 16, and 25 for ellana

 Thank you!!!! Put it under the cut because this got way too long I can’t shut myself up lmao

2. What is their first impression of their advisers?

Josie probably made the best first impression by giving her an elven greeting, Ellana’s slight hesitation to even be in that room was thrown right back out the door and replaced by a rush of happiness. It was the only elven that Josephine knew but it still meant a lot that the woman even tried. ….Also, she was cute and Ellana adored her hairstyle. She liked Josephine from the get-go. She also thought the other advisers were attractive so that’s a bonus. She easily jumped aboard the Leliana train when the woman suggested Mages and argued against Templars, leading her to seek out Leliana out of the advisers first for further conversation later.Cullen was… a mixed impression. She already held a distaste for Templars, but she liked to keep an open mind and give people chances. Later on she’d be glad for this, but during the early first meetings of the advisers she was strongly adverse to his opinion of the mages and openly said so.

7. How do the Inquisitor and Hawke get along?

Ellana and Garrett became friends very quickly, and she spent as much time with the Champion as she possibly could during his time with the Inquisition. He has a fantastic sense of humor but doesn’t use it to distract from his emotions, instead outright talking about them which Ellana finds just. utterly fantastic. FINALLY someone else who doesn’t ignore their feelings and is willing to talk with her about them, and her own. Pretty much 98% of their time in each other’s company is spent talking, sitting close together or walking arm-in-arm. Garrett is one of the first people who has eagerly embraced Ellana’s tactile tendencies and wasn’t immediately turned off by her repeatedly reaching to touch his arm in conversation. Ellana finds it very difficult to part ways with someone she befriended so easily.

11. Who does your Inquisitor leave behind in the Fade?

This is a choice I always spend 5 minutes thinking over, even after convincing myself my canon choice is to leave Stroud behind. Because I just know Garrett would refuse letting the man stay behind when the Grey Wardens need someone of authority to lead them out of this rut. Bonus fact: In my DnD campaign my first decision was to slam the DM hammer down to make the Hawke Twins AU canon, and in that verse Marian stayed behind while Garrett and Stroud left with Ellana. Marian was 100% prepared to knock her brother out if he argued any further about her staying.

16. What would your Inquisitor do once Corypheus was defeated?

In the early days of the Inquisition, Ellana often spoke of how she longed to return to her Clan when their mission was complete. But after defeating Corypheus she found it too difficult to leave her new friends, and hesitated each time she saw her reflection without the Mythal vallaslin. Her family would welcome her back and she knew that, told herself numerous times but there would without a doubt be clan members who looked at her bare face with confusion or [her fear] disgust. That’s without taking into account all the work the Inquisition still had to do after that wannabe-God bastard was slain.

25. Does your Inquisitor have a preferred party to bring with them on adventures? (i.e Cassandra, Dorian, and Varric)

She does! She always asks Dorian to join her after they were blasted into the future together and she latched onto that shared experience pretty tightly, and over the ridiculous amount of time they spend together on those adventures he becomes her closest friend and she couldn’t imagine having anyone else at her side during them. She asks Iron Bull at first because she was impressed by his fighting in the Storm Coast and the excitement they shared when seeing the dragon there, after that she asked him because she enjoyed his company and humor that pulled her back from getting too serious in the field. Not to forget his and Dorian’s growing relationship, Ellana always made sure to tell Dorian that Bull was coming as well with the biggest grin on her face. She asked Solas to join her in the early days because she was fascinated by his conversations about the ancient elves and the Fade, and it didn’t hurt to keep a healer near either. 100% later on it’s because she’s a dork in love and she couldn’t bear the thought of not speaking to him for well over a month when traveling a long distance. Bonus fact: Ellana at one point launched herself onto Bull’s back in excitement after seeing one of the high dragons flying overhead, both of them shouting some pretty colorful language in their mother tongues.

[dent-de-leon]

ooh who did u romance in the dragon age games if i may ask

YES absolutely,, here we go:

Origins: Alistair. I played as female city elf the first time and following the brutal murder of my Warden’s fiance I showed up at Ostagar in a bloody wedding dress feeling Very Upset. And then Alistair showed up and I dunno, he just seemed very nice and meant well and we didn’t always agree on everything but he still made me laugh and was way Too Kind. 

Unfortunately, I screwed up and didn’t realize hE SACRIFICES HIMSELF AT THE END FOR YOU IF YOU DON’T DO THE OTHER THING REGARDLESS OF YOUR DECISION,, I WAS SO MAD,, like I didn’t start this game with my fiance dying for me only to end it the same way and I went back and replayed the last leg of it sooo many different times to find some Ideal Scenario where we both survive and Alistair didn’t dump me. I love my Hawke so much, but I saved Alistair again in Inquisition because I didn’t go through all that shit the first time just to lose him. That being said I also have a major thing for Lelianna, but I never got around to romancing her just cause I like Alistair too much lmao.

You know what though? I really like his interactions with Morrigna in DAI. Like, seriously, if there was an option to tell Al to leave me and go raise his kid with Morrigan, I would. I want him to be there for that kid more (as long as Morrigan herself opened up more and was okay with it)

DA2: fenRIS,, played male and female Hawkes but prefer female Hawke’s VA but anyway, I usually always go mage. And as soon as Fenris showed up, I just knew I loved him. Liked his intro. Loved his personality. His character arc really got me and he was the person I was most invested in and wanted to grow closer to and keep safe. I have a fair lot of issues with the way his story was handled though. I realize part of the theme of DA2 is outcasts and forgiveness and how far your companions can go before they’re beyond redemption, whether or not they still deserve it. 

But the way the narrative tries to frame it as people saying it’s Fenris’ fault his life was tainted by dark magic–You wanted this, you competed for it–really sickens me. It’s not wrong he was trying to escape or earn a better life for his family. Yes, for at time he still felt like there was really no running away from Denarius and did horrible things for him but he was enslaved, manipulated, stripped of all autonomy until the last of his will to fight was completely gutted. It took him so long to realize that another life was even within the realm of possibility, and the fact that he’s able to grow into someone ready to stand their ground again is really incredible. And he doesn’t even want to hate his abusers either, tries so very hard to let go of that hatred and heal and find his way in his new life and I just. Have a lot of feelings about him. 

I hated some of the ways his route was handled though. Namely that you’re required to sleep with him, which triggers memories that are extremely upsetting and causes him to distance himself from you for years. I wish there was an option to not be that intimate (or at least not so soon) and let him take his time and go at his own pace instead of pushing too far and hurting himself and needing to withdraw back into his own space. I really don’t like that he has to be hurt like that. I’ve romanced Anders and Merrill and even Sebastian (though I got divorced because he left cause I wouldn’t kill Andy) in other routes, but Fen is always my fav. Not just in DA2, but out of all the available love interests. 

Inquisition: played a female elf again for nostalgia’s sake, and went mage route again. Being mage in DA2 and DAI is honestly just too much fun for me not to. I was actually trying to romance Sera, but…elf, mage, approval was really hard. And Solas kept giving me approval left and right, so I was like–eh, I can work with this. Plus, he was like so good to Cole?? I read Asunder before DAI and Cole was my absolute fav, so the thought of dating someone who made my boy happy and took care of him was also super appealing so…yeah. I romanced Solas instead. This of course inevitably led to a lot of heartbreak and that’s a whole essay in itself, but I will forever still call him “my elf god ex” and be incredibly upset about. Shoutout to Trespasser for letting me know that if I had dated Cullen I could have had a wedding and a new dog like,, I don’t even like Cullen very much but a mABARI pUPPY,, way to rub it in Bioware thanks 

My next play through I played a male mage elf and romanced Dorian. Could write up a whole other thing on him too, but I have very mixed feelings about it. But I super liked that they gave me the option to opt out of the more physically intimate aspects of the relationship and also have a conversation with him about why I preferred that (I also liked that other routes like Solas and Josie didn’t include a sex scene at all). And you don’t rack up disapproval for not sleeping with him the way you do with Alistair (“It’s fine,” he says. -8 disapproval, the game says. Thanks man). I honestly think Dorian’s route was one of the ones I felt most comfortable playing as an ace guy. Anyway, I loved Dorian even if he was sometimes frustrating, but I’m happy to see he’s going to try and change Tevinter for the better. And I really hope to see him in the next game. 

I romanced Josephine in another route too, and she was a real sweetheart. AND I’D ROMANCE KREM IN A HEARTBEAT IF THEY’D LET ME,, PLEASE I LOVE HIM DEARLY–

[largelungs]

END OF YEAR *2*0*1*9*

Girls who love computers // Meathead sad boy hardcore // Extremely horny pop music // Weirdo dance music // Inoffensive indie pop // “World” music // Rap that white people like // Rap that nobody likes // Things that sound like Yung Lean // Things that are Yung Lean // A bunch of stupid shit that sounds bad

...

03 Greedo / Trap House

100 gecs / money machine - I fucking hate this band

Aldous Harding / The Barrel

Amnesia Scanner / AS Aca

Anamanaguchi / Lorem Ipsum (Arctic Anthem) - I’m never not listening to this song

Angel-Ho / Business

Angel Olsen / New Love Cassette

angelic milk / acid & coca-cola - the most normal sounding song by a Russian artist on this playlist

Ariana Grande / 7 rings

Babyface Ray / The Streets - The Levels section of Pitchfork is criminally underrated and they told me that Babyface Ray is the Voice of the Detroit, which I believe because I just believe everything I read

Baby Fendii / Glock19 - I don’t know shit about this song but I just looked up the music video and its in my fav genre of “hoes with guns in the pool”

Bad Bunny / Callaita - I literally can’t tell the difference between Bad Bunny and any other reggaeton but FUCK IT

Bella Boo / Do The Right Thing

benny blanco & JUICE WLRD / Graduation - this song played at Juice WRLD’s funeral

Bicep / Glue

Big Thief / Forgotten Eyes

Bill Callahan / Young Icarus - really haven’t sat down with my very good friend Bill Callahan’s new album (he’s my friend) and given it a hard listen but I’ve been a big fan of this song so far so I just listen to it a bunch

Billie Eilish / bad guy - this song was refreshing af to hear on the radio at my old cafe; you can make a valid argument that billie eilish is super corny but, uh, she’s seventeen??? I hope she sticks around cause I’m really curious how her work’s gonna mature if its already this realized

Blind Seagull / Nails - I was always under the impression that Russia has two genres of music: pretty sexy boy and ugly old man who is yelling at me, but it turns out they also make insanely catchy post-punk! Detritri records is a godsend and I’ve listen to so much Russian music this year that I can’t relate to any of my friends anymore

Bonnie Baxter / ELF OWL - One of my favorite genres is “dropped a bunch of stuff on the ground and then recorded it”

BUMP OF CHICKEN / 記念撮影 - Despite the ridiculous name this band is huge in Japan; I found out about this song cause its used in an emotionally overwhelming One Piece music video that is just a 5 minute ad for noodles.

Burna Boy / On The Low

Caroline Polachek / So Hot You’re Hurting My Feelings - It’s the singer from Chairlift! Remember them??

Cate le Bon / Home To You

CHAI / Great Job

Channel Tres / Sexy Black Timberlake - house music + hip hop

Charli XCX / White Mercedes - I am nothing if not a Charli XCX stan - put it on my fucking headstone, baby

Charly Bliss / Under You - I know nothing about this band but this song was used in a promo for a dope looking DIY slice of life game

Clams Casino / Rune - Am I supposed to rap over this?

Control Top / Office Rage

Counterparts / Wings of Nightmares

Danny Brown / uknowhatimsayin¿

Dorian Electra / Career Boy

Drinking Boys and Girls Choir / National Police Shit

Dump Him / Unimportant - finally, a lesbian Tom Delonge

Earl Sweatshirt / El Toro Combo Meal

EARTHGANG & Young Thug / Mirrorland

Ecco2k / AAA Powerline - This is Swedish culture like it or not

Ecco2k & Thaiboy Digital / Western Union - SONG OF THE YEAR SONG OF THE YEAR SONG OF THE YEAR

E-Saggila / Aziza - Dropped stuff again but the stuff is really heavy this time

Fire-Toolz / Field Whispers (Into the Crystal Palace) - it’s like Burzum but he’s trapped in a computer (and also not a Nazi)

Floating Points / Bias

Galen Tipton / Fake Meat - This time you dropped a bunch of baby toys

Grimes /  4 AEM - The more you hate Grimes the more I stan her, and I honestly DO NOT KNOW WHY

Griselda / Chef Dreds - Buffalo rap! RAP RAP RAP!!! STREET SHIT!!!

Hannah Diamond / The Ending - You’re gonna hate this

Headie One / Both - The UK’s best exports are grime, breakfast, and bar brawls

Holly Herndon / Frontier - this album is Holly Herndon and an AI choir and its fucking INSANE

James Ferraro / Recycled Sky

The Japanese House / You Seemed So Happy

Jay Mitta / Don Bet - AYYYYYYY

Jenny Hval / High Alice

JPEGMAFIA / Jesus Forgive Me, I Am A Thot

Juan Wauters / Blues Chilango

Knocked Loose / Mistakes Like Fractures - I listened to a lot of a meathead hardcore this year but legit it all sounds the same so this is just a stand-in for all those albums

Koffee / Toast

Lafawndah / Ancestor Boy

Leonard Cohen / Happens to the Heart - He ain’t dead bitch!

Lil Reek / Maintain - Rap game Andy Milonakis

Lil Tecca / Ransom

Lingua Ignota / MAY FAILURE BE YOUR NOOSE

Loraine James / Glitch Bitch

MahiToThePeople / Madaanoumigaaokattakoro

Mannequin Pussy / Patience

Mindforce / Excalibur - Somehow it took this long for someone to mix hardcore and high fantasy

Moor Mother / Imagines - Death Grips adjacent

The Mountain Goats / Possum By Night - My favorite song about being a possum

Nilufer Yanya / Heavyweight Champion of the Year

Nikvek / Walking in a Spiral Toward the House

Nonlocal Forecast / Celestial Nervous System

Octo Octa / Imminent Spirit Arrival - New Hampshire house music

Organ Tapes / Springfield - Actually my most listened to album of the year

Oso Oso / basking in the glow - The logical progression of Long Island emo / glad to see Jade Lilitri still getting love years after State Lines

Otoboke Beaver / datsu . hikage no onna

Partybreaker / Cвет истины - Russian straight edge hardcore

Pharmakon / Spit It Out - I was gonna see her live but I bailed cause I AM OLD

Polo G / Through Da Storm

Pop Smoke / Dior

Restraining Order / Don’t Really Think - less meathead more snot-nosed

(Sandy) Alex G / Hope - Snuck in Alex G real quick last minute; I have not listened to them in like two years lmao

Shin Guard / Kennedy

Shirokuma / Black Lungs - scratches that blackened atmospheric emo itch left by Pianos - who are apparently still a band?

Shitty Life / We’re Dead - SNOTTY!

Shortparis / Страшно - soundtrack to my Russian fever dream

Shygirl / BB

Sisso / Biti No. 5

Slayyyter / BFF - Reminds me of crunkcore but somehow even hornier?

Slowthai / Doorman

Solange / Stay Flo - I think I can name more Solange songs than Beyonce songs??

Soul Glo / 31 - Brings the total number of black dudes in hardcore to like 6

Storm{O} / Ho Chi Minh - Huge soft spot for Italian hardcore

Sturgill Simpson / Sing Along - this man is literally the only country musician actually innovating the genre besides maybe Hank Williams III who made an album that’s just blast beats and cattle auctioneers

Substance / Countdown

Sudan Archives / Confessions

Swan Meat / Suckling - I FUCKING LOVE THIS SHIT

Tami T / Princess - I literally cannot tell if this is good but I’m fucking obsessed with it (also SWEDISH)

ТЭЦ / Видел я немало лошадей

Thom Yorke / Dawn Chorus

Tre Oh Fie / Give it 2 Em

Triad God / Gway Lo

Tyler the Creator / EARFQUAKE

Vampire Weekend / This Life

Vi som älskade varandra så mycket / Men livet går vidare - SCREAMO FROM THE MOTHERLAND

Weezer / The End of the Game - I’m sorry

Weyes Blood / Andromeda

Wizard Apprentice / You Won

yeule / Pretty Bones

Young Thug & Lil Baby / Bad Bad Bad

Yung Cortex / I’ve Been Waiting - I have no idea what the fuck this is but its terrible and I fucking love it

Yung Lean / Blue Plastic

Yu Su / Little Birds, Moonbath

[leylight]

@ciaraloves I can't believe that I finished Empire of Storms like two or three weeks ago. At the half of it I was so sucked into the story I couldn't help it and read it in two days. And guess what I forgot again? Taking notes cause I'm dumb™️ Good thing is this post isn't going to be wayyy to long. Bad thing is sorting my thoughts is kinda impossible.

And oh my goodness there was so much going on I can't put all my thoughts into words and if I miss something important I'm really sorry.

I really started to like and care about Manon. Her going against her grandmother was just *chef kiss* And I loved the Duo of her and Aelin in the end so so much. Although I'm still not convinced about her and Dorian but it didn't bother me so it's fine. And I especially liked it where she gets the keys and know that she have to bring them far away from Maeve.

Speaking of Dorian I enjoyed to see the Rowan and Dorian bonding time after Rowan rescued him and they trying to convince Rolfe so much. And it was also kinda refreshing that the team had to split up cause things were happening parallel which is way more realistic than things just happen time after time.

Oh and Aelin using her powers... Uhm excuse me? Please marry me? I was so in love with her journey in this book. From being rejected by the old landlords (were they called landlords? My memory is still so bad I'm sorry) to find so many allies. And all the obstacles she had to and has to overcome.

And I don't know how it always happens that I think that I get a good overview of the story but than BAM BIG REVEAL. Either I got dumb or SJM is very good in plottwist and everything.

Lysandra and Aedion also didn't fail to amaze me all the time. I mean a seadragon? Exuse me? Join my marriage with Aelin please?

Also enjoyed the journey of Elide. And she not knowing Celeana and Aelin being the same person is so relatable lmao

Oh and the Elena thing...Tbh I have no words for that. And I have very mixed feelings about that whole thing

And HOLY THE END! GIIIIIIRL, DON'T DO THAT TO ME! MY HEART CAN'T TAKE THAT... I thought the other books destroyed me but nope this was worse. If the next ones will be even worse I won't survive that.

Can we just stab Maeve please?

Conclusion Im so in love with these books and the world that lives in it. I really want to see what will happen next cause at this point I have no clue where this story is heading to.

@the-love-yourself-journal I can't believe what I missed all the time. I finally started to read Throne of Glass and I'm half way through and I already freaking love it?

The thing is I'm normally read in my native language because I just can get lost in the stories so much better because I just can let me fall and I'm not tripping over vocabs I don't know. And I can listen to music while reading (I can't stand silence very well) which I totally love and which make me fall in the story even deeper. But although I read Throne of Glass in English and I can't listen to music and sometimes I tremble over some words I just fly through the pages and I'm so hooked that I don't even recognize the silence around me. And I really had to force myself to stop reading and get my things done today. Talking about that please excuse me I have to go reading again I'm just too excited to see what will happen.

[reinkist]

this is my dragon age inquisition character, elliott ... he started out as a less serious character that i was going to use to flirt with literally everyone with and then i got invested ;=; and now i've got more time on his game than in my main original game. but so turns the world, and apparently now i'm doodling him 1,000,000,0000 times elliott's a human rogue. he's the youngest kid (by a lot. his next oldest sibling is eight years older, the very oldest nineteen) in a noble family in the free marches. when he was a little kid his mother taught him how to pick locks and sneak around, and she'd use him to spy on various other nobles she suspected of various things, and, notably, elliott's father, who she suspected was cheating on her. the household gradually emptied as elliott's older brother and sisters all either married or went off to serve the chantry, and his mother's paranoia worsened. even when elliott became old enough to join the templar order, like he'd been promised to since birth, she refused to allow them to take him, up until she died of an illness when he was in his 20s. he was sent away to meet up with his father's templar contact at the conclave, but, obviously, that didn't go as planned so elliott grew up a weird mix of sheltered as fuck but also exposed to a lot of the dishonest and immoral intricacies of noble life at a very young age. he's a little bit dim and a lot ignorant, but he's naturally emotionally intelligent, and tries really hard to understand where people are coming from. he also gets such bad crushes on almost everybody, and has only just started understanding the potential consequences of his flirtatious nature (aka both josephine and scout harding got their feelings hurt). he's a little bit too honest about how other people make him feel, and that can lead to him kind of leading people on he's eventually going to romance dorian, but right now he's got a big mess of feelings he doesn't know what to do with. they have a lot of sexual tension, but elliott's always getting owned in conversations. he doesn't even agree with half of dorian's points, but can never think of a good argument quick enough, so he always loses debates. right now he's stewing in this frustration that's half good and half just ... frustrating hahaha i also love the idea of dorian falling for this boy who is just free marches as fuck, yeah he's a noble but he might as well have lived in a cave as far as dorian's concerned ,,, lmao {: like elliott's inquisition throne is that one with all the dog heads screaming out of it, and he loves the shit out of that thing thank you and good night

[andrewminyerds]

My OCs as members of my Shrimp Squad

As requested by @superstellars (I love you) My OCs as the Shrimp Squad and why - Bella would be Ryden bc he's a bit of a dragon enthusiast and is obsessed with anything to do with reptiles (mythical or not). He records his thoughts in a journal but instead of words it's drawings bc words are hard. He's always misplacing his phone so it's nearly useless to get a hold of him lmao but he's a reliable friend who's always got your back - Simone would be Clairen bc she's the mom friend (Clairen is literally a mother) and her words always make the other person feel better when they need it. She's someone who projects enough confidence that the people around her feel bolstered in their confidence as well. She exudes a warmth that makes you want to be around her but she will kick ass if she is wronged. - Gracie is most similar to Dorian who is always ready with a meme or joke or anything to break the silence in an intriguing way. He's a gorgeous man but is always striving to look as best as he can when in public (even if he definitely lounges around in nothing but his boxers at home (which utterly appalling to his twin lmao)). He's observant and creative and knows when to be serious af. DO NOT CROSS HIM bc he's a force to be reckoned with when the full force of his anger is unleashed. - Morgan seems the most like Adryn to me bc she's open about who she is and give absolutely zero fucks about what anyone has to say about it. She likes the way she looks and delights in showing off in cute clothes/trendy outfits. Seems like the kind of girl who has connections to Everyone™ and knows just how to deal with certain people. - Nylah would be The Assassin bc she can handle anything thrown at her with a mix of grace and good humor. Always ready to teach those closest to her about what she's able to when they ask and seems knowledgeable beyond her time. - Thalia is definitely Faervyn bc he is a Tol Bean™ and very nice to be around once they've opened up. Is a little intimidating at first but that's quickly erased once you get him talking about anything that genuinely interests him. Good person to bounce ideas off of bc they eventually snowball into something you weren't expecting (but in a good way).