#she didn’t cover it up until 2019

[10millionotters]

Robyn is helping me develop Marie by asking me all sorts of questions about her and by that we learned she used to have a dickbutt tattoo because Rookies can’t be trusted with a tattoo gun

[luvjunie]

— sleepover

pairing: e-1610!miles x fem!reader

contains: fluffff! jeff and rio being realistic parents, miles being stubborn per usual

summary: miles’ parents finally agreed to letting the two of you have a sleepover, on one condition. however, miles was never the best at following directions. wc: 1,630

New york. The city that never sleeps.

The faint murmuring of bustling cars and the habitual honking of horns seeped through the tight seal of the shut apartment window; ironic in the way it somehow lulled you. An imperfect melody you welcomed—also the same one deemed a nuisance by those foreign to the chaos that naturally assimilated to comfort the longer you remained in Brooklyn. It usually helped you slip into a slumber with ease—but now— was succeeding in its attempt of doing the exact opposite.

And when you heard Miles expel a weighted, disgruntled sigh; you were led to believe the two of you had more in common with each other apart from the fact that you both lived here.

After weeks and weeks of begging, and endless explanations as to why exactly he needed his girlfriend to sleep over when they wouldn’t even get to utilize the time spent together because they were supposed to be asleep, Miles had finally convinced his mom and dad to let the two of you have a sleepover.

Fun, right?

Yeah, well you thought it’d be. Until his mom insisted the two of you bring your pillows and blankets and fantasies of your life as a matured couple to the living room and sleep out there. Six feet away from each other. You guys were practically social distancing like it was 2019 all over again.

The curt reasoning she offered included something about her not wanting the two of you in his room alone at night; not that she thought her son would actually be dumb enough to do anything along those lines with her in the house. You loved Mama Rio, but even if you didn’t, it wouldn’t matter. This was her house, and that meant you had to follow her rules. The fact that you were even able to come over as much as you did was a blessing in itself, so you took everything else in stride.

Miles let you take the couch of course, and he was currently sprawled out on his back on the floor, a pillow tucked beneath his head as he studied the minuscule cracks in the ceiling as if they truly interested him. Scrolling through his instagram timeline had gotten old fairly quickly, and at 1:00AM in the morning, neither of you were really motivated enough for conversation.

You were more than grateful to spend a night with your boyfriend, but this wasn’t necessarily how you expected it to go. Whenever you guys would hang out during normal hours of the day, you’d always end up in his embrace, curled and cuddled into each other comfortably. Whatever movie or tv-show you’d put on in the background begging for the same attention you’d give each other. After growing used to such a routine, that was really the only way you could fall asleep at his house.

But alas, holding your pillow close to you instead of him would have to suffice, you decided, as you let your eyes close once again.

“Baby?” Miles called out into the darkness, lip chewed in anticipation.

Silence.

He’d said only a word but you knew better than to engage. A conversation would end up with the two of you in trouble in the morning, so you pretended to be asleep.

“I know you’re awake. I counted exactly three seconds between your last two breaths and when you’re asleep it slows down to five.”

You stifled a laugh, ultimately blowing your cover. “Okay, now that’s just creepy.”

“People who are asleep don’t laugh!” he quipped.

A smile snuck onto your lips and you hadn’t the heart to reprimand it, lids peeling back open to stare up at the same ceiling he was.

“Yes, Miles?”

“Can you not fall asleep either, or have I become an insomniac all of a sudden?” The question came with a sigh, long arms spread to their full wingspan as he tried to count how many full rotations the ceiling fan made in a minute. That was how bored he was.

You sighed disappointedly, toying with the frayed tassels on your blanket. A moue on your face. “No, I can’t fall asleep either.”

“I think I know why.” he sung the last word in suggestion, hands absentmindedly drumming against his abdomen.

“Miles,” you warned, letting your head fall to the side so you could stare at the top of his head and address him directly. “Your mom gave very specific instructions, and personally, I would like to return home to mine with my head still on my shoulders.” grumbling your response, you shoved down the urge to invite him up there with you like your mind was telling you to.

He propped himself up on an elbow at that, eyes immediately making contact with yours. Your first mistake was not looking away, because those pretty pools of hazel were already starting to convince you and he hadn’t even opened his mouth yet.

“But how is that fair?” he complained, sounding exasperated. “We take naps together all the time when you’re here, I just wanna cuddle with you.” he sulked, as if you were the one who’d come up with the rule. Never in a million years would you submit the both of you to this kind of torture. You loved falling asleep in his arms.

You rolled your eyes at him, “Well, yeah. But that’s during the day, when she can check on us anytime she wants to. I don’t think your mom wants us that close to each other at night for,” The last part of your sentence faded to a jumbled murmur as your gaze traveled back to the ceiling. “…obvious reasons.”

He impishly raised a brow as if he didn’t know what you were referring to, chin resting in the palm of his hand. With only the faded lights of the city to illuminate the living room, the cheeky smile on his face went unnoticed, though you could hear it in the tone of his voice, loud and clear.

“And what reasons are those?” Miles asked, feigning innocence. His long lashes blinking at you.

Hand smacking to your forehead, you recited a silent prayer, a plea for strength. It was beginning to look like you weren’t going to get yourself out of this. “You know exactly what I’m talking about.”

His hand gestured to the air, plainly. “Well obviously. But still, we’re not dumb. That’s why I always take you to the roof when we—“

“Miles Gonzalo Morales do not finish that sentence!”

He snorted at the squeak of your voice and you used your pillow to hide your heated face.

“This is not going to help us fall asleep.” your irritated statement was muffled from the fabric of the pillowcase.

He hummed. “Exactly, meaning there’s only one thing left to try.” Slow to catch on, you didn’t realize what he meant until you felt the couch dip from the weight of his knee.

A hand trickled up the exposed skin of your thigh and it stopped when it met your sleep-shorts clad hip, the pillow snatched from your face and tossed onto the floor where he previously resided just a second ago.

“What are you—?”

He hovered over you, one hand pressed into the cushion beside your waist to hold himself up. Your question fell short when he swiftly parted your legs with his other hand and comfortably slotted his body between your thighs. A relieved sigh escaped him, his cheek nuzzling into the soft of your chest when he laid on top of you. His favorite way to cuddle.

“Shhh, trying to sleep.” murmuring a dismissive answer to your query, he let his eyes flutter to a close and snaked his arms around your waist, forearms cradling the curve of your back.

Contrary to the fight you were putting up just a minute ago— your arm curled over the expanse of his shoulders, fingers idly twirling at the baby curls that dusted the nape of his neck, something you always did to help him fall asleep faster. He let out a low, satisfied sound and relaxed into you completely, his hold on you tightening. While a part of you wanted to protest, an even bigger part wanted to remain under him like this. His weight was comforting; made you feel secure in the way a weighted blanket did.

“Your mom is not going to be happy with us.” you reminded him, stretching your other arm down enough to grab your blanket and pull it up over the two of you.

“It’s worth it. I’ll happily take the blame,” he drawled sleepily, snuggling in closer to the kiss that grazed his forehead. “I love you…” The laggard pace to his words let you know he was already dozing off, and you smiled, fatigue finally catching up with you too.

“I love you, Miles.”

— extra scene

Jeff stood in silence, arms folded over his broad chest and lips puckered awkwardly. Rio occupied the space next to him, hands perched on her wide hips, fingers tapping against them and her jaw clenched in disapproval. Her expression was everything but amused at the scene in front of them. He stole a tactful glance at his wife every two seconds, silently trying to gauge how irritated she was without having to ask her.

Sometime during the night you and Miles had switched places, and now his lanky legs were draped over the arm of the small couch and you were on top of him, clung to his body like a wet T-shirt, face barely visible seeing as it was nestled into the crook of his neck. With his mouth hanging slack as he loftily snored, Rio felt her eye almost twitch while she stared down at her stubborn son, who seemed to have magically teleported from his assigned spot on the floor and into yours instead.

“Well, I coulda told’ya that would happen.” Jeff said quietly with a laid-back shrug, to which Rio responded with a back-handed swat to his chest.

“Ow!”

Through her aggravation she still kept her voice low as to not wake the two of you, eyes narrowed at her husband. “I am going to strangle this boy, Jeff. Dios ayudame. ¡Tu hijo nunca escucha! (God help me, your son never listens!)” she griped, gesturing towards Miles’ arm that was loosely circled around your waist. She tramped down the hall, hands tossed up in defeat while she grumbled something incoherent under her breath.

Lips downturned into an offended frown, Jeff coddled his chest with his palm and followed after her, voice kicked up an octave like a nagging child. “Why is he only my son when he does something you don’t like? We made him together!”

- please do not plagiarize, copy, or repost my works to other platforms!

likes, comments, and reblogs are much appreciated 💗

[f1version]

26 BIRTHDAY KISSES ★ CL16

pairing: charles leclerc x gf!reader ( she/her )

summary: 26th birthday, 26 pictures of you and Charles kissing. A kiss for each year.

notes: i’m back from my birthday trip!! i wrote this birthday special in like 30 minutes and it’s still charles’ birthday in a couple of places so… i’m not exactly late! enjoy <3

26 KISSES: A GALLERY

By your beautiful girlfriend, in collaboration with a lot of people but mainly Joris and ourselves.

1. DRUNK DANCING: A month after we got together, we were at Arthur’s 18th birthday. We got drunk, singing and dancing to the worst playlist in existence (Lorenzo’s) and, somehow, Arthur got to capture this moment I barely even remember.

Taken by Arthur Leclerc, 2018

2. AUGUST 2019: Summer break, so sweet so loving. You made me promise that if you jumped off first, I would jump too. It took me fifteen minutes to follow after you. Also your kisses were incredibly salty.

Taken by Joris Trouche, 2019

3. THE MONZA INCIDENT: I had red lipstick the night you won in Monza, you told me it looked pretty, I asked you to kiss me, you did. Fast forward 8 minutes it was all smudged over your lips, you were 10 minutes late to the post-race conference, and Sylvia almost banned me that night. (I’m still kind of banned from your driver’s room)

Taken by Charles Leclerc, 2019

4. UNDER THE COVERS: 2020, what a crazy year. This one was taken the day we decided to finish moving in together. You were so excited, wanted everything to be perfect. Today I can say it is.

Taken by Me, 2020

5. WORDS: We were spending Christmas by ourselves, we face-timed our families, had dinner and watched movies. You gifted me three beautiful words I, of course, said back… and we also got a puppy!

Taken by Charles’ phone timer, 2020

6. OCEAN BREZEE: Just a small escapade to take a breath. You were so cuddly that day, Joris was so done with you (he still took the pic though)

Taken by Joris Trouche, 2021

7. CUTE OR HOT: I just wanted a cute morning selfie but, because of you, we ended up in a…promising mood. It was intense that’s all I have to say!

Taken by Me, 2021

8. KISS KISS KISS: 24th birthday, 24 kisses. This kind of became a tradition, let me know if you still want them this year!

Taken by Me, 2021

9. DRUNK AF: How did we got so drunk? Ask Pierre, he was the one hosting. Either way we got another amazing photo of us drunk-kissing!!!

Taken by Pierre Gasly, 2021

10. UNDER THE SEA: I’m just going to say that you and your ‘photo ideas 📸’ folder are attached by the hip. I personally love this one (even if it took half an hour to take)

Taken by Joris Trouche, 2021

11. NEW YORK: Thought you could scape this one? Never! Arthur and I didn’t spend a week listening to your complaining for nothing, babe. You must admit that this kiss was magical, everything was so pretty that day. And then it started snowing!

Taken by Arthur Leclerc, 2021

12. EXPOSED: Remember how our amazing soft launch got ruined by our trip to Ibiza? Well, here it is, the image we couldn’t stop laughing at when it came out, we really thought we were sneaky.

Taken by unknown, 2022

13. HARD LAUNCH: A week later we were kissing on live TV. It’s one of my favorite memories, I couldn’t stop smiling.

Taken by F1 TV, 2022

14. BACK KISSES: Just a picture of the morning after I learned that you can convince anyone, even the CEO of Ferrari, to allow you to leave sponsor events early. I really don’t know if you knew those kisses were there, but I woke up to this, took a picture and then left you with them until we took a shower.

Taken by Me, 2022

15. SPONSORED BY AIRMAX: That time your team forgot to book us a flight and you had to ask Lando to ask Daniel to ask Max if we could go back to Monaco with them. I’ve never seen Max talk so much, Daniel laugh so loud or Lando taking so many pictures. He even asked to take one of us, here it is:

Taken by Lando Norris, 2022

16. SIXTEEN: I bet you thought this one would have something to do with racing. Number 16. Sorry to disappoint but it’s our beautiful puppy…Sixteen! I’m not gonna lie, I still hate you for persuading me into that name. Anyways if you kiss the dog you kiss the mom!!

Taken by Me, 2022

17. 25 KISSES: Again, tell me if you want those 26 kisses this year. Look at us last year!

Taken by Me, 2022

18. NEW YEAR, SAME LOVE: Sometimes the world feels unreal when I’m with you, this was one of those days. I felt in another reality, the world slowed down, it was just you and me. I remember thinking “I fell in love with the right person” and then you kissed me.

Taken by Joris Trouche, 2022

19. BLACK SUIT: Remember when your fans thanked me for your “new” outfits? They repeated it was the girlfriend effect, you couldn’t stop talking about how stylish you are with or without me!

Taken by Me, 2023

20. PHOTOSHOOT: You got Joris to take these shots just because you wanted a new wallpaper. I thought it was silly, until one day all of them were hanging around our home. You are the best thing that’s ever happened to me, Charlie.

Taken by Joris Trouche, 2023

21. FIVE STAR CHEFS: Not much to say, just sorry for being so distracting and thank you for the amazing (stolen from Ferrari) dinner babe!

Taken by Charles’ phone timer, 2023

22. RED LIGHTS: This year’s addition to our drunk-kissing collection. I remember you drowning shots with Carlos and Pierre, asking me to dance with you, absolutely failing at that, and then kissing me. After that there’s blurry ferrari red, giggles and a hot bath.

Taken by Andrea Ferrari, 2023

23. LAZY IN BED: Wonderful lazy days by the ocean, that’s how we spent the summer break. That morning in particular you didn’t want to get up, basically gluing me to bed. We got up at 1pm.

Taken by Me, 2023

24. JUST ONE QUESTION: Can I drive the purosangue now? Please please please

Taken by Me, 2023

20. LOVER: This day I woke up thinking about those dreams we talk about all the time, you even remembered me a couple of them throughout the day. Charlie, I do want to do this for the rest of our lives, never forget it <3

Taken by Arthur Leclerc, 2023

26. TWENTY-SIX: We are just 26 but I hope our story keeps on writing itself. I love you, these have been the happiest 6 years of my life. Happy birthday bébé ❤️

Taken by Joris Trouche, 2023

[wosoimagines]

Our Day - Alessia Russo/Reader

prompt: Alessia and R get married.

words: 4637

warnings: none

(Y/N) POV

“You going to tell me what’s up with you now?”

Of course, Alessia had picked up that something was wrong with me on the drive back to our place. I swore that Alessia knew me better than myself; she certainly knew how to read me better than my family did.

But she wasn’t completely out of line. Normally, when she picked me up from the airport after I returned from a national team camp, I had stories to tell her about everything I had gotten up to either during practice or in my free time with Sonnett and Rose since they were the two that I was usually spotted hanging out with since neither Christen nor Ali had been called up in a while. But I had been completely silent the whole ride home and even as we headed inside.

I looked over my shoulder at Alessia as she shut the door behind her. I didn’t say anything to her, but I did hold my arms out to her. I melted into Alessia’s arms as soon as they wrapped around me. Nor did I hesitate to jump up to wrap my legs around Alessia’s waist as she moved her arms to hook them under my thighs so she could carry me.

“I just really want cuddles right now,” I softly said.

Alessia wasn’t one to deny me cuddles. I don’t think she had ever denied me cuddles since our freshman year at UNC.

We were in our room and in our bed under the covers in no time. I immediately curled up against Alessia. This was exactly what I needed after how the end of my trip home had turned out.

The two of us stayed there as we just took each other’s presence in. I had really missed having Alessia with me.

“Did you end up going to see your family?”

I nodded because I hadn’t actually decided if I was going to the family BBQ my parents had been hosting until that day. It had also been the first time since Alessia and I had decided to join the WSL that I had been to see my family by myself.

Alessia had quickly learned just how bad my relationship with my family was once we started dating. I had been hesitant about taking her to meet my parents because I was sure that they were going to have a lot of backhanded comments either about myself or Alessia. I hadn’t been wrong. The amount of comments they had made about me had concerned Alessia enough that she had asked me about it once they finally left after one of our home games at UNC.

I had to explain to Alessia how growing up with my younger sister meant that everything I had done was never enough in my parents’ eyes. If I had better grades than my sister? How dare I make her feel bad about herself for setting unreal expectations. I won the World Cup in 2015 just before I turned 16? I was on the bench for most of it whereas my sister had managed to make the cheerleading squad while I was gone. I got a full ride to go to the University of North Carolina between my grades and my soccer scholarship? Good because they had to save up so my sister could have a college fund just in case she wanted to go, so they weren’t going to help me if I didn’t have it covered by scholarships.

Spoiler alert: she never did want to go to college, so our parents just handed her the money for her to blow through as she pleased. None of us were entirely sure what happened to all the money, we just knew that she had already used it all up without investing it into anything.

After I won my second World Cup in 2019, my sister had been so upset that so much attention had been paid to me from so many people who knew my family that I had gotten scolded as soon as I had gotten to my parents’ house once we got back from France.

That was the first time Alessia’s family had also realized how badly my own family treated me as they had been helping Alessia settle back into the apartment that the two of us shared with Lotte. I had called Alessia crying so she had made the eight-hour drive the next day to pick me up before taking me back with her to UNC. Alessia’s parents had assured me that should I ever need somewhere to go for holidays to avoid my family that I was always welcomed at theirs.

“Want to tell me what happened?”

“I hate her.”

“Eve?”

Really Alessia didn’t even have to ask who I was talking about. I nodded my head in confirmation though as I buried my face in Alessia’s neck. The blonde striker threaded one of her hands into my hair as she started to massage my scalp.

“What did she do this time?”

“She wants our wedding.”

Alessia froze at that. I had the same reaction when I found out as well.

“She wants to have the same exact wedding as us?”

I shook my head as I tried to keep the tears at bay. Alessia reached up with her hand that wasn’t threaded in my hair to wipe away the tears.

“She wants to literally take our wedding. The date, the venue, and all of our vendors. She wants us to give it to her,” I said, causing Alessia to pull me closer to her. “And my parents are taking her side. It’s supposed to be our day and they all just want us to give it up like we haven’t been planning this since the Euros.”

“It’s okay, love,” Alessia softly said. I buried my head into her neck again. “It will be our day. You think any of our teammates will let them ruin it?”

I shook my head. I wasn’t sure if our teammates were more excited about our wedding than we were or not. Honestly, hearing Tooney talking about it with Alessia always brought a smile to my face. Not to mention that my own teammates were great at making sure that I never got too overwhelmed with all of the decisions that Alessia and I had to make. I think Sonnett had been the most excited for it outside of my team moms, but I also think it had more to do with her wanting to finally officially meet Tooney after all of the stories she heard me talk about what Tooney and Lessi got up to.

Alessia just held me as I tried to calm down. She would often softly whisper reassurances that everything would be okay, and we would have our day. I wasn’t sure how long the two of us laid there wrapped in each other’s arms, but I did know that I would always have Alessia.

“Why did Eve want to take our wedding?” Alessia asked again to break the silence.

“She’s pregnant.”

“I didn’t even know that her and John got engaged.”

I hadn’t either. It was obvious that my parents had known because they didn’t seem surprised like the rest of the family had been when Eve announced that they would be getting married soon.

“She said she wanted it before she started showing and so she wouldn’t have the stress of planning a wedding while she was pregnant,” I explained. It made no sense of how her decision would be fair to Alessia and I who had to be strategic about planning our own wedding to make sure that it wouldn’t clash with our WSL schedule or the NWSL schedule. But we had to be careful to make sure that we wouldn’t miss any callups to our respective national teams, especially considering that a huge majority of the people who would be attending were on our national teams. “As if we wouldn’t have to wait until 2026. But none of them are using their brains. As if Eve and John would get everything prepared to be married here in England? And the trips that they would need to be planned? Not to mention the amount of people who have already made arrangements to be here for our wedding.”

“John was on board with the idea?”

I understood why Alessia was asking. John and I had actually gotten along quite well. Alessia had gotten along with him as well. He was probably the only reason we had originally invited Eve and John.

“No, he seemed hesitant when Eve brought it up,” I admitted. John did seem genuinely uncomfortable when Eve had turned to me and even asked her to sit down. “He texted me later on and said that Eve had talked to him about it earlier, but he didn’t agree with asking me since they knew just how much planning it took for us to make sure that everyone we wanted to be there could. He also explained that he didn’t think Eve was going to bring it up or he would have warned me.”

“What did your parents say?”

“My dad asked why it mattered where we got married when I brought up that if we wanted to use the same venue we’d have to wait until 2026. And my mom told me that it was selfish because we weren’t expecting a child.”

“Why should it matter where Eve and John have their wedding then?”

“That’s what I said!”

“And why exactly can’t they wait until after Eve gives birth?”

“I don’t know.”

Alessia pulled me back into her side. It was all just so frustrating that it seemed like everything they were asking of me didn’t apply to my sister as well.

“You know we can always uninvite them, right? And we’ll let security know so that they won’t be allowed into the wedding.”

I knew it would be the next logical step for us. And it would have to be one for us to pursue to make sure that our own wedding didn’t get ruined because my family favored my sister more than me.

“Don’t worry, love,” Alessia said before she pressed a kiss to the top of my head. “I’m going to make sure that no one ruins our day.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I couldn’t help but let out a laugh once Alessia’s head came up from the bowl that her head had been buried in. Her face was covered in the whipped cream that the bowl had been filled with, but she was the first out of the group to blow a bubble with the gum she had gotten from her bowl. She sent me a grin as I shook my head before I headed for the front door once I heard the knock. I was hoping that it was the delivery driver here with our pizzas finally.

Alessia and I had been so busy figuring out games and practicing and wrapping up the planning for our wedding that we both had forgotten to figure out what we were going to prepare for dinner for the team. It was Leah who suggested that we just order pizza for the team and neither of us were going to argue against pizza.

“How much do I owe‒”

The smile immediately dropped into a frown when I cut myself off when I realized who was on my doorstep.

“What are you doing here?” I asked. I didn’t miss the way the woman winced at my tone. “Did being uninvited to the wedding not convey the message enough?”

I pushed the two further out onto the porch so that my teammates wouldn’t have to hear any of this. They were all quite aware that something serious had happened while I was visiting my family in New York, but Alessia and I had been entirely forthcoming about the situation.

“(Y/N), we need to talk to you,” Mom said.

“No, you need to leave. I have guests over.” I couldn’t believe that this kind of a move from my parents surprised me this much. “I don’t want to see either of you unless you are going to sincerely apologize for trying to hijack my wedding so that Eve could have it.”

“You need to prioritize your family,” Dad said as he pointed at me. “We all have to make sacrifices for our family. And this is a sacrifice that you need to make for your sister.”

“Oh, we all have to make sacrifices?” I asked. I shook my head as I let out a laugh at the thought. “And please tell me what kind of sacrifices that Eve has ever made for me?”

Both of my parents stood there in silence, and I wasn’t surprised. I knew that Eve had never done anything for me. I knew that Eve would never do anything for me either.

“That’s what I thought. Because she’s never done anything for this family. I never had anything growing up except for soccer and I barely had that because Eve was so jealous of my success with the one thing that I really loved that you two nearly forbad me from playing,” I pointed out as I shoved my finger into my father’s chest. I was tired of letting my family step on me. “The amount of times I had to share my birthday with her when her own is in the winter and mine in the summer? All of my presents that you would get that were for her and never me? When does it all stop being about her? Because now I have my own wedding planned out and you want me to give it to her! So, when is it going to stop?”

“(Y/N), this really isn’t fair,” Mom pleaded. She wanted to talk about being fair? To me?

The door behind me opened and I tensed as I looked over my shoulder. The last thing I needed was for it to be one of my teammates, all of which I knew could get overprotective fast. But it was just Alessia, and she could get overprotective fast but at least she knew everything that was going on.

“You’re taking too long bringing the pizzas in,” Alessia said as she wiped at the whipped cream that was still on her face. I sighed as she looked up only to freeze when she realized why it was taking me so long. “Not pizzas. Much more understandable why it’s taking so long.”

“Oi, Russo! What’s taking the missus so long?” I groaned because the last thing I wanted to add to this was our team’s card leader. “Oh, I didn’t know we were having others over.”

“Macca, just go back inside,” Alessia said.

“Why? Is everything okay out here?” Katie asked.

I sighed as I pinched the bridge of my nose. While I normally appreciated how quick Katie was to befriend Alessia and protect the blonde striker, I really didn’t want to risk adding her to the dumpster fire of an argument that was about to happen on our porch.

“No, it’s not,” Mom said. My head whipped around as I glared at her. She hesitated as she fidgeted under the glare. “(Y/N) is being selfish and refusing to help family.”

“Oi, come one, (Y/L/N),” Katie said as she nudged me. I only groaned as pretty much the rest of our team had come to see what was happening. “You gotta help out family.”

“No, you both need to leave,” Alessia cut in. Katie’s eyebrows shot up as she glanced at Alessia. This is how I knew that Alessia hadn’t told Katie the full story yet even though they had gotten close to each other. “You both know what it is we want from you, and if you can’t give us that then you need to respect our wishes and leave us alone.”

“No, (Y/N) needs to make a sacrifice for this family because family is important,” Dad said.

“Make a sacrifice? You want me to give up my entire wedding! For a sister who has never cared about me and always been put ahead of me!” I snapped. I didn’t care anymore. I didn’t care who knew the truth. I’d rather people pity me for how I was treated growing up than painted as a villain in front of my friends. “She doesn’t just get to take our wedding because she’s pregnant! Alessia and I have put so much time and effort into making sure our day was going to be perfect for us! We didn’t do it for Eve! We did it for us! If Eve wants to get married so badly before the baby is here, then she can take John to the courthouse and get married and then have a ceremony for everyone to go to later when it won’t be so stressful for her!”

“(Y/N), calm down,” Alessia softly said as she laid a hand on my arm.

“No! I’m tired!” I broke down as I looked at Alessia. My shoulders slumped forward because I knew that Alessia was aware of how I felt, but I had never once vocalized it to anyone. “I won’t play second fiddle to Eve anymore. Not when we are talking about one of the most important days of our lives. The fact that either of you are taking her side is insane! I know you both prefer her over me, but you know that we had to be so careful about the timing of our wedding because we are both professional players and so are all our friends and no one has the same season schedule so we had to be careful to make sure everyone could come! You both know that!”

“They’re calling you selfish because you refuse to give away your wedding?” Caitlin asked.

I didn’t even bother looking at my teammates. I knew that they would be on my side, but there had been that small voice in the back of my head telling me that none of them would actually support Alessia and I and our stance on this.

“Dude, that’s majorly fucked up,” Jen said.

“Language!”

“No! You don’t get to come here and scold my friends!” I said as I rounded on my mom. “I don’t want to see you anymore! You are not invited to the wedding! Dad is not invited to the wedding! Eve is not invited to the wedding! None of you are really my family! If you were none of you would have ever asked me to give up the day I get to celebrate my relationship with Alessia! My real family is the one I’ve gotten to build since I joined the national team in 2015. So don’t call me. Don’t text me. Leave Alessia and I alone because neither of us want you in our lives.”

We all stood in silence for a moment as my parents stared at me. I ignored the tears that were threatening to spill down my mom’s face. And how my dad’s jaw had slacked slightly. Neither of them deserved to be sad or shocked at my reaction, not after how they had treated me for so long.

“It’s time for you both to leave,” Kim spoke up after a moment. I recognized the tone she was using too. I had been on the receiving end of it enough times over the years to know that she was serious. “And for your sakes, I’d stay away.”

“Yeah, mates, come near either of them again and we’ll be the ones setting you straight,” Leah added on.

My parents stared at me for a moment longer before they both were heading down the road. It only took Alessia a second to wrap me up in her arms before she took me back inside.

I knew that we couldn’t avoid explaining everything to our teammates, but I just wanted to enjoy the night playing games and eating pizza with my friends. No, with my family. We could tell them everything tomorrow.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“You guys didn’t have to come.”

The two women who were sitting across from me both raised a brow. I knew that they both had their own problems to deal with.

“Alessia had to call me and Tobin just to tell me what was going on,” Christen pointed out. Had it been before this previous year, I wouldn’t have hesitated to talk about the problems I had been having to either of the women sitting with me. “You used to tell us everything and lately it seems like you haven’t been sharing anything with us.”

“You both have your own stuff going on. You don’t need my dumpster fire of a family added to that.”

“You are family to us,” Ali said. I only gave a small shrug to that. “Hey, no. The stuff you’re going through is important to us, (Y/N). We want to know what’s going on with you.”

“It isn’t fair that I burden you guys with my drama too. I mean, Christen’s trying to rehab from a fourth surgery, and you’ve been dealing with your family stuff and the whole situation.”

Christen sighed as she reached across the table to grab a hold of my hand.

“Just because we have our own stuff going on doesn’t mean you’re a burden. It’s honestly worse when you don’t tell us what’s going on. Especially since Alessia was the one to call us and tell us that we should come see you cause you were struggling.”

“It’s fine. Just my parents choosing my sister over me again. Nothing I’m not already used to.”

Christen and Ali both looked at each other. They were both well aware of the problems I had with my family considering they frequently ended up stepping up when my own parents couldn’t be bothered to help me.

“Alessia didn’t tell us much. Just said that you should be the one to explain everything to us,“ Christen added.

I only gave them a little shrug. I still hated that all of my Arsenal teammates were aware of the situation. I really didn’t want to drag more people into the depths of it all. Especially since I knew that I would get questions from my national teammates as to why my family wasn’t at the wedding anymore.

“They wanted me to give the wedding to Eve,” I admitted after we had sat in silence for a moment. “I told them no, but they came out to try and convince me again. I snapped at them in front of the team.”

“Do we need to talk to them?”

I shook my head at Ali’s suggestion. I was tired of trying to convince my parents to finally choose me over my sister. If they wouldn’t choose me for the most important day of my life, then I wouldn’t choose them anymore.

“I uninvited them to the wedding.”

“Good.”

I still felt a little guilty about it. But that was mostly because of the number of messages that I was getting from everyone in my family telling me how low it was for me to keep them all from such an important event.

“I did want to ask you two if you would take my parents spots?” Both of the older players across from me froze. “Neither of you have to. “But you both treat me like your kid more than my own parents do.”

Christen and Ali shared another look.

“(Y/N), we’d be honored,” Ali said as she reached out to grab my free hand. “You’re always going to be our kid. You moving overseas and playing for Arsenal never changed that. But if you pull any stunts with Alessia like she-who-shall-not-be-named, I’ll hunt you down myself.”

“I won’t,” I assured Ali. I knew that everything had been really rough for her lately. It had been especially frustrating that I hadn’t had the time to fly out to visit her due to my schedule. “Besides, I’m pretty sure you’d have to fight with every single Lioness and Gunner to get to me first. And you’re already barely holding it together chasing after all the twenty-year-olds in the NWSL.”

Ali rolled her eyes at me. I knew that Ali would make it her mission to get her hands on me first even if she was at the disadvantage of living overseas from me.

“So, what are you wanting us to do in the wedding?”

“I’d love it if you guys would walk me down the aisle. And the dances. Oh, and we’re gonna have a private ceremony where we sign the marriage license. I’d love for you two to be there, and for the wedding pictures.”

“We would love to.”

I softly smiled at that. It really did mean a lot. Alessia and I hadn’t really had much of a chance to talk about any of it yet, but I knew that she was prepared to ask her parents to skip those parts of the ceremony or if they could do the dances privately so that I wouldn’t feel left out.

“The father/daughter dance is to Wildflowers by Tom Petty. And the mother/daughter dance is to Never Grow Up by Taylor Swift,” I told them as I looked between them. “I don’t mind who dances with me for each of them. I would really like to share one of them with each of you.”

“You’ll get a dance with each of us. Promise,” Christen said as she grinned at me.

“Now, do you think Alessia would like it if I asked her to be a godmother for the kids as well?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“You know Ali asked me if I wanted to be a godmother?”

I couldn’t help but grin as the two of us swayed together as we watched where our friends and family were dancing in front of us.

“She might have asked if I thought you would like it.”

“I loved it.”

I gave her a soft hum of acknowledgement. I knew that she would, and I had told Ali as much. Alessia had fallen in love with Sloane and Ocean the first time she met them.

“What did you think about our day?”

“It was perfect,” I assured the blonde striker. I turned to look at her as I pulled her face to look at my own. “Everyone that I wanted to be here was. I got to dance and celebrate with the people who I consider my real family.”

“No regrets about…?” Alessia trailed off.

The two of us had been avoiding any and all talk about my biological family. We had reached out to all of our vendors as well as security to make sure that none of them could ruin our day, but today had gone off without a hitch.

“None. I think it was the first time in a long time that I’ve been happy not to have them around for such a big milestone in my life and I think it’s because it was my choice.”

While Alessia and I hadn’t made much of a mention of my biological family, it didn’t mean that my therapist hadn’t helped me through it. But I was truly at peace with the situation.

“I’m happy to hear that, darling.”

“Besides, I got to marry the love of my life.”

“There’s nothing I would trade to marry you.”

“Not even a World Cup?”

“Not even for a World Cup. Much rather would be known as the wife of (Y/N) Russo rather than have a World Cup.”

“Careful there, Russo, your WAG is showing.”

“Let it. After all, it’s our day. We’ve got everyone we want here. And we’ve got each other for the rest of our lives. Nothing can ruin it for us.”

[dykeknightrises]

FALLING

A/N: Sooo, I never actually wrote anything like this, but this one pretty much wrote itself randomly in my brain and I kinda liked it! So I appreciate any feedback I can get and I really hope you guys enjoy it :)

(Also english is not my first language. I did check it but something may not be quite right )

Next parts: Part 2 - PROMISES Part 3 - US

She smelled like the sun. Whether this is a real thing or not, Y/N didn’t care. Right now, buried under and completely surrounded by her, Y/N would vow on whatever entity really existed that Alexia smelled like the sun.

It wasn’t always the case. Before, Alexia smelled like comfort, maybe even a little bit like being under the covers, a mug of hot chocolate between her hands while the rain poured outside. Now everything changed. Now she smelled like summer, like the water wetting your feet right on the edge on the sand on a hot day spent on the beach.

The in-between of then and now, and even the before that, if Y/N was being honest, was a rollercoaster of joy, happiness, heartbreak, and sadness. Falling for Alexia was far too easy and almost a habit for her, she had been doing that for years now.

Y/N first fell in awe of Alexia when she watched her play her first u-17 Euros, back in 2010, when she was just fifteen. Even when the Young Lionesses didn’t go very far, Y/N managed to convince her parents that they absolutely had to stay for the whole tournament. 

Alexia was still a wide-eyed teenager, shy to give interviews and speak up, but so confident and skilled in the pitch that Y/N could not helped but to feel in absolute awe. It wasn’t even a question that the midfielder would be a great player and it wasn’t even a question that Y/N would start to keep up with her career the best she could, she would even use the poor excuse that the shared their position when her friends bugged her too much about it.

Y/N first feel in admiration with Alexia when she played against her during the 2012 u-19 Euros. Despite being only fifteen, Y/N was called up when someone got injured and even made the line-up for the game against Spain.

Ninety brutal minutes later that resulted in England being eliminated, Alexia made sure to speak and praise every single one of her opponents. That was the first time they ever spoke. Y/N wasn’t even sure if Alexia remembered that, but the praise the older girl gave her and the sheer amount of respect she was given made her admire Alexia as a player on a whole new level.

The “See you in a Champions League game.” that the older girl said goodbye with echoed in her head for years, until the moment she signed with Arsenal as her first professional contract a couple of years later. Y/N really hoped to play against Alexia again.

Y/N first fell in respect with Alexia in Budapest, during the Champions League final in 2019. Despite the overwhelming loss from the start, she watched as Alexia gave her blood on the pitch. One of the most agonizing games Y/N had ever watched, being able to even taste the desperation while surrounded by thousands of culés ins the stands.

She watched the absolute heartbreak the team faced, the broken stares as they watched Lyon lift the Champions League cup again. She watched as the twenty-five years old fourth captain picked her teammates up, reassured them and listened to them. She watched the midfield swallow her own despair and angst to take care of her teammates, as a captain and leader would. Y/N could help but to respect the Catalonian as player, as person. Not everybody can do that.

Y/N first fell in fondness with Alexia when she was the first to make her feel at home in Barcelona. Leaving Arsenal and home behind was terrifying, even if Lucy and Keira were in Barcelona too. It’s a new city, a new culture, a new language, new teammates, and a new sense of self.

Arriving and settling in Barcelona was easy, but fitting in and becoming a part of the team was much harder. Spending so many countless evenings and night trying to learn the language that Y/N began to neglect herself a little bit seemed like a small price to pay to be in the team. It wasn’t until Alexia herself asked to speak to you, realizing that you were unconsciously closing yourself off until you were “ready” that you realized what you were doing. Upon seeing the realization in your eyes and knowing that her mission was complete, the older woman slipped a bar of your favourite chocolate over and left with a squeeze on your shoulder.

After that, it wasn’t long until you were a part of the very chaotic Barcelona family. By the time that the Winter Break arrived, the team had settled in a very nice post-practice routine. On Mondays, the guiris got together, helping each other fit with the country. Tuesdays and Wednesdays the whole team holed up at someone’s house, usually Irene’s, and just bonded, going from watching trashy movies to destroying each other on board games. When there were no games on the weekend, the Fridays were for going out on a very non-wild night, just to eat out and spend more time with each other.

Thursdays were sacred. You and Alexia got together, spending the whole time watching old matches, nitpicking plays and dissecting games from opponents or your favourite players. The night usually ending with you cooking, her cleaning and crashing at the bed after taking Nala for her night walk.

Y/N first fell in love with Alexia after the Winter Break, when Alexia was opening the gift, she brought from England. It was a grand thing, but the older woman’s eyes shone so brightly when the Christmas tree’s light sparked that Y/N was sure her heart skipped a beat.

Being in love with Alexia was easy. Between the team’s bonding and their own, all their weekdays were spent together, and Alexia usually dragged Y/N over for lunch with the rest of the Putellas family, where she fit right in. Her days were filled with Alexia’s presence and her nights were filled with dreams of her.

Y/N never entertained the thought of Alexia loving her back. Not she was an asshole or anything, but Alexia was different. Keeping her feelings to herself, not even telling her best friends came naturally, as she knew they would encourage her to try something, but that is just because they didn’t see Alexia like she did.

Friendships with Spaniards were very confusing at first. They were very touchy and very feely and, at first, it made Y/N a bit uneasy to be able the differ when they were hitting on each other and when they were just being friends. She finally settled in taking everything as a friendship moment if she wasn’t told otherwise and left at that.

On a Thursday, instead of watching a game like their usual, Alexia wanted to go dancing. They got ready at arrived at the Sala Apollo when it was already packed, heading to the bar, and having a couple of drinks before the older woman dragged them both to the dance floor. The closeness and intimacy of dancing with each other came easily for them. Letting the heavy bass of reggaeton guide their moves and being pressed together was almost as natural as cuddling on the couch after a movie.

It wasn’t until Alexia’s hands began to wonder that Y/N though better about the whole night. When the older woman’s lips found a spot on her neck and her hands found their place on her hips after squeezing her ass, Y/N was gone. Turning around and kissing Alexia, they were locked in a much wilder dance at that point. Not staying too long after that was natural, as it was sharing a bed of a whole different manner.

Y/N first fell in heartbreak with Alexia when she called their night a mistake. Waking up the next day, surrounded of filled with the midfielder, Y/N smiled and lost herself on the skin of Alexia’s back being hit by sun. Having coffee turned sour on her mouth after Alexia’s words and feeling has heart break on her chest was hard enough, but she could let the older woman know the damage her words had done, she loved her too much for that.

Leaving Alexia’s house that day was one of the easiest and hardest things Y/N had ever done. It was easy because she desperately needed to leave, she needed to let the tears stream down her cheeks away from the other woman’s praying gaze. It was hard because it closed the door on any possibility of the words being a mistake themselves. After promising Alexia, and lying through her teeth, that everything was okay, Y/N left.

People say grieve has five stages. Y/N was no expert, but she was pretty sure that whoever was supposed to go through them was the person grieving, so she didn’t quite understand Alexia’s sudden avoidance. The captain found new teammates to do all the training exercises together, spoke to her only when necessary and cancelled all Their Thursdays for the past few weeks.

A part of her told herself that maybe Alexia felt guilty, maybe she wanted to take the word Mistake back. That part was very strong, it was pulsating, it gave her hope. That part told her to not give up and just give her part.

Y/N arrived just in time on the locker room to overhear Alexia answering a question about a date. Her latest one. On a Thursday. She couldn’t pay a lot of attention to the midfielder answer without had eyes tearing up, so she tried to block the conversation as much as she could, and it was going pretty damn well until she lied to her teeth once again when someone asked if she didn’t mind that the dates where always on a Thursday.

The called up to represent the Lionesses came as a blessing, giving her a break from the club. It was much easier to be her usual self, joke around with her teammates and going on a full-blown prank war against Georgia when she could pretend Alexia didn’t exist. It was also much easing swallowing down her hopes and downloading Tinder when she was sure Alexia would not pop-up on her screen.

Swiping left on all the women that the app showed her was unconscious. Y/N didn’t even realize she was doing that until Leah caught her with the app opened and started to swipe with her. When the captain asked for the billionth time what was wrong with the last woman, the only answer she had to give was that none of them were her. That prompted her to tell her best friend everything. After convincing Leah to not do something stupid, the captain just told you not to worry and that she would find you the perfect date.

 With the time with the national team up, Y/N flew back to Barcelona, smiling as the she sees the city lighting up against the night sky. She barely has time to settle back before Leah texts her that she found her a great date and saying that they will both fly out for the Champions League match in a couple of weeks.

Between trying to find out more information on Leah’s mysterious friend and the sting that came whenever Alexia promptly ignored her, Y/N days passed slowly. It’s easy to distract herself on the days that are occupied by the team, but Thursdays were the worst. The hurt that came the being subbed out of Alexia’s life was just more prominent on these days and Y/N didn’t quite know what to do about it.

The Champions League finally came and with it, Leah and her friend being in town. The date was going to happen the day before the match and Y/N wasn’t sure whether the anxious feeling she had were for the match or for the date.

Getting ready was almost automatic. A nice short black dress paired up with a light makeup as they would go to dinner at a nice restaurant that Y/N absolutely loved. Waiting for the time to go out, she turned the TV on started watching and old match, absently minded remembering that it was a Thursday. Not that any of that mattered anymore.

The doorbell rang just as Ronaldinho scored a goal, making her tear her eyes away from the game. Y/N walk to the door in confusion, not expecting anyone today. The team was doing their own Thursday thing and Leah was out with Lucy and Keira, leaving literally no one to be at her doorstep at almost eight.

Hazel eyes greeted her upon opening the door. Alexia stood in front of her, in her comfiest hoodie and sweatpants, the beanie tucked in her head, cheeks rosy from the wind. Her gaze, holding hope and a thousand secrets, wandered through you figure, before settling back in your own eyes.

“I was hoping we could have our usual Thursday? I have a lot that I need to say to you.”

[whatdoeseverybodywant]

You're the Only Girl for Me - Chapter 29

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TBH! At this point, this is a joint collab with @paigereeder 😭. GOAT!

Thursday, September 2nd 2021 

Airielle’s peaceful slumber was interrupted by her phone ringing. Groaning, she snatched her phone off the floor next to her and squinted at the screen to see who was calling her. “Oh my god.” She muttered before accepting the call. 

“Hello?” 

“Why in the fuck didn’t you tell me Christopher popped the fuck back up. I knew I should’ve killed that motherfucker when I had the chance.” Her older brother Isaiah seethed over the phone and Airielle sighed closing her eyes as she pinched the bridge of her nose. “Airielle!” He shouted into the phone when she didn’t respond. 

“Because I had it under control.” Airielle looked behind her as Josh started to shift in his sleep, sighing she threw the covers off of her and walked into the living room to finish her conversation. 

“Uh-huh, sure you do. He broke into your spot -” 

“And I moved, problem solved.” She shrugged, eyes glancing around the living room just taking in how much he had actually gotten rid of. “Shouldn’t you be working?” 

Isaiah snorted. “I took the day off.” 

“Hmm,” Airielle hummed. “And that’s why you’ll never be Dad’s favorite” 

“Eat my - “ Airielle hung up before her brother could finish his statement. Rolling her eyes she threw her phone on the island. She looked up when she heard Josh shuffling into the living room. 

“Everything Aight?” Josh mumbled as he walked closer to Airielle and kissed her cheek. 

“Yeah, my brother being a pain in my ass.” She replied, rolling her eyes when he chuckled. “What you got going on today?” 

“Nothing. I gotta do some laundry and gotta pack. Got Smackdown and the House show this weekend.” 

“You wanna go get some breakfast first?” She asked, tapping the screen on her phone to see what time it was. “I’m kinda craving waffles.” 

“You already know the answer to that.” Airielle rolled her eyes with a smile as she wrapped her arms around his waist and leaned her head on his chest. 

“Can you believe it’s about to be a year since we met?”  It's crazy to think about all the ups and downs they went through in a year! If she could go back and change anything it would definitely be breaking up with him after he asked her to move in with him. That would have saved them months of heartbreak. 

“You wanna hear somethin’ wild?” He waited until she lifted her head from his chest to continue. “That wasn’t the first time we actually met.” 

Airielle furrowed her eyebrows together and tilted her head a little. 

“Huh?” 

“We actually met back in 2019. Me and twin had a meeting with Hunter, down at the PC and I saw you there. I mean I was looking, respectfully, but I was still looking.” He laughed when Airielle rolled her eyes again.  “Hunter told us he was taking us off TV after Jon’s latest arrest but he still had - 

“Y’all cut a promo for us.” She whispered as the memory of their first meeting came rushing back. “I remember y’all looking so pissed but still came and cut like one the best promos I ever heard.” 

“Mmhmm.” Josh hummed while nodding his head. “I remember trying to come talk to you, but you weren’t even trying to give ya boy the time of day. I mean I understand why now but shit, back then I thought you were like this stuck up bi-” He stopped himself when she narrowed her eyes at him. He cleared his throat. “You know what I mean.” 

“I mean I was a bitch to you when I came to the main roster.”  Josh nodded his head in agreement and Airielle sucked her teeth, pulling away from him. 

“What? you said it, not me.”  Just as she went to smartass him, his stomach released the loudest grumble she had ever heard. They both stared at each other before bursting into a fit of laughter. “You the one who brought up waffles, I mean you already know how I get down.” Airielle sucked her teeth and pushed him away from her before walking back towards his room so she could grab her clothes to shower. 

“I feel like they just need to go ahead and sponsor your greedy ass Uce.” She chuckled, her back to him as she shuffled through her bag looking for something to wear to breakfast. She stood up straight and gasped as she turned and bumped into Josh. 

“Whatchu’ just call me?”  Airielle bit her lip to stop herself from smiling at the look he was giving her. “Airielle, stop playing with me.” 

“You wanna go get waffles or not?”  Josh tilted his head as he stared at her. He was really contemplating on not going to the Waffle House with her because who the fuck did she think he was. Uce, had she lost her damn mind? He wasn’t her damn Uce. He went to tell her that they weren't going to breakfast but his stomach growled again making her smile. “That’s what I thought.” 

AirielleJones

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“You gon glare at me throughout breakfast or what?”  Airielle asked him as the waitress walked away to put in their orders. “Why can’t I call you Uce?” She pouted. 

“Cause I don’t fuck my family Airielle.” 

“Boy –” 

“Oh my god. Look at you! You’ve gotten so big.” A new voice interrupted their conversation. Both Airielle and Josh both turned towards the new voice. Josh narrowed his eyes as he looked at the woman. She was older than both of them, with dark brown skin; for some reason, her facial features reminded him of Airielle. Josh turned to look at Airielle to ask if she knew who the hell this lady was but he stopped short once he saw the look on Airie’s face. He had only seen that look one time before. 

A couple weeks before she broke up with him she had this same look when he had tried to initiate sex but she wasn’t in the mood for it. That’s the same day he found out Christopher used to force her to have sex with him. He remembers her telling him that her old therapist called it dissociating. Josh immediately stood up and stepped in front of this lady, blocking Airielle, who was still sitting in the booth, from her view. 

“You good?” Josh asked the woman, straightening his shoulders so he was standing at full height. 

“Are you her bodyguard or something?” Another voice piped up from behind the older women and Josh definitely knew that they had to be related to Airielle in some sort of fashion because this girl and Airielle could pass off as twins. 

“Yup. Now answer my question, Y’all good?”  

“You must be Joshua.” The older woman said. Holding her hand out to him. “I’m Abigail and this is my daughter Janelle.” 

“Cool, y’all can leave now.” He said eyeing her hand with disgust. Whoever this woman was made Airielle uncomfortable and he wanted her away from them ASAP. Abigail’s hand hung in the air awkwardly for a moment before she withdrew it and cleared her throat, forcing a smile on her face. 

“Airielle please tell this man that I am your mother and I just want to talk to you.” Josh’s eyebrows shot up at the news. “Please solèy –” 

“Don’t call me that,” Airielle spoke up. “You have no right to call me that.” Airielle stood up from the booth and grabbed Josh’s hand. “I want to leave.” Josh nodded his head immediately. Breakfast forgotten, he ushered Airielle back to his car. 

“You okay?” Josh asked as he pulled out of The Waffle House parking lot. 

“No,” Airielle said. “Pull over.” As soon as the car came to a stop, Airielle threw open the passenger door and threw up nothing but stomach acid. “Fuck!” she cried out. 

Josh handed her a bottle of water and she thanked him, swishing it around in her mouth before spitting it out.  “That was–” 

“If you don’t want to talk about it, we don’t gotta talk about it.” 

“I know.” Airielle smiled and grabbed his hand, stroking the back of it with her thumb. “But I wanna be more open and honest with you.” Josh bit his lip and nodded. “That was my birth mom and her daughter I guess.” 

“Y’all not close. I take it.” 

“Nah,” Airielle shook her head. “She left when – well right after she gave birth to me. She never wanted me, never wanted a daughter, but I see a lot has changed in the past thirty years. I remember growing up, she would always send my brother’s gifts and cards on their birthdays but never mine. I didn’t really care because I didn’t remember her anyway. But um- one day I was just curious as to why she seemed to ignore my existence so I got her address off of one of the packages she sent my brothers and wrote her a letter.” 

Airielle quickly wiped away her tears. She hated crying over this woman. Josh squeezed Airielle’s hand gently. “She wrote me back. Which kinda shocked me but I was happy that she did. I was thinking she was just gonna tell me that she was just feelin' guilty about leaving me but, she said the complete opposite. She wrote me 4 pages, front and back, telling about how many times she unsuccessfully tried to abort me. How she tried to give me up for adoption without my father knowing. How she had a plan to tell my dad that I had died during childbirth.” 

Josh’s jaw was damn near on the floor as he listened to Airielle. No wonder she’s so emotionally challenged  He thought. 

“She blamed me for the fact that she couldn’t see her boys grow up, she blamed me because my dad chose to raise me instead of be with her. The final thing she wrote to me was, I wish you would have died. Do not contact me again. So I didn’t, I ripped the letter up and burned it. Never told my dad or my brothers about it and obviously neither did she.” 

“What the fuck.” Josh whispered, his hand tightened into a fist on his thigh. Abigail or whatever her name is better than her lucky stars that Josh didn’t put his hands on women. 

“Yeah I mean, I just wanted my mom, but she didn’t want me..” Airielle shrugged as she tried to stop the tears but it was too much. She had pushed Abigail and her hurtful words into the back of her mind in the folder with Chris and her unborn baby. Seeing her today just opened up a wound that Airielle thought had semi-healed. 

Josh pushed his seat back and pulled her over the center console so she could sit in his lap. He held her tightly as she cried into his shoulder. Josh gently stroked her back, his voice low and soothing. “It’s alright. I’m right here, okay? We gon’ get through this.”

As her crying eased, Josh kept her close, feeling her heart slow against his. He didn’t let go, knowing she needed this more than anything. He wasn’t just comforting her; he was vowing to stand up for her in every way he could.

Whew.. Miss Abigail is a trip!

What do y'all think about this chapter??

❤ Reblogs, comments, likes, and feedback ALWAYS appreciated ❤ 

Abigail Noelle Roy

Janelle Noelle Roy

🏷️: @christinabae @southerngirl41 @reci1996 @jeyusos-girl @empressdede

@harmshake @paigereeder @li-da-savage @nbanenefrmdao @alyyaanna

@theninthwonder @raya-hunter01 @abadbitchblogs @jaethaone @black-yn

@mzv11 @shantinextdoor @sheydnni @zillasvilla @thatone-girly

@xmonetsworld @bebesobrielo @kill-the-artiste @yana3sworld @bookuce

@sageispunk @amandairene88 @rianasixx @vebner37 @mindairy

@trashbin-nie @saintaquarius @adoreesun @shayaaaaaaa @sayyestoheav3nn

@xbriexx @edtomh @princess-saki1 @kat3457 @queeny23

@privateeyed95 @rebelrel0987

[mydearesthrry]

debriefing - h.s.

a/n: hey lol this is really shit honestly and i dont like the end but i wanted 2 get smth out. enjoy, love you

wc: 851

pairing: harry styles x fem!reader

warnings: none, a couple f bombs

summary: a small debrief with your boyfriend, harry.

“Harry!” Y/N called to her boyfriend, her legs tucked underneath her as she scrolled on her phone with a shocked look on her face. “Baby, come down here right now, holy fuck!” 

Harry’s loud footsteps were heard as he bounced down the stairs, clad in nothing but a baggy pair of gray sweatpants and fuzzy socks on his feet. “Wha’ happened, lovie?” 

“Debrief.” Was the only thing she said before Harry widened his eyes, running over to the kitchen and grabbing two wine glasses and a bottle of Prosecco they’d gotten the last time they were in Italy. She hopped up from her spot on the couch as well, skipping over to the pantry to grab their big bag of popcorn and the smaller bag of peanut m&ms. They got back to the living room at the same time, placing everything down on their glass coffee table, trying to be careful as to not knock down the picture frames that housed pictures of them over the years. 

Harry sat down first, his long legs splayed out on the couch, one falling down over the edge to plant his foot up on the floor, leaving a gap of space for Y/N to slide between. She took the message and sat right between his legs, both of hers hiking on his left thigh. Harry’s hand rested on the full of her thighs, his thumb tracing tiny patterns onto the soft skin. She leaned forward to fill their glasses, handing one to Harry and grabbing hers to nurse on her lap. 

“Okay, you’ll never fucking believe what I just saw,” Pulling out her phone from her waistband, she pulled up the Instagram post that had been the reasoning for the debrief in the first place. “Andrew and Ivy are together.” 

Harry’s jaw dropped. “What?! Didn’t Ivy jus’ get a divorce, like, 3 months ago?” 

She nodded. “Yes! That’s why this is so fucking weird! I know they had a weird fling back in 2019, but I didn’t think that it was that serious!” 

“Tha’ is s’weird… D’you… Do y’think that they…” He approached the subject carefully, not wanting to seem dickish. 

“Do I think they fucked while she was with Isaiah? Yes, yes I do,” She giggled, turning a bit more to face her boyfriend fully. “Wasn't Andrew also with that girl Leah? I think I remember you telling me about that.” 

Harry nods, taking a sip of his wine. “Yeah, he told me ‘bout her last time we went back to London. Didn’t seem too serious about her, if ‘M honest… He described her like she was jus’ a quick fuck to him.” 

They sighed, disappointed looks on their face. “That sucks.” 

He hummed. “Yeah… But— wait, did I ever tell y’about those two crew members who got caught having sex in the porta potties back at the Forum?” 

“What the fuck? No?!” Y/N gasped, reaching forward to grab the bag of popcorn to put on her lap. 

“Yeah, yeah! Apparently, there were these two workers, honestly don’t have a clue what they did, but I think their supervisor had come t’check if they were doing okay since they hadn’t been answering the radios, and when the supervisor passed by, the guy came out the loo with his pants down!” He explained, handing her his glass so he could gesticulate with his hands as he talked (something he loved to do which Y/N found so cute— then again, she thought everything he did was cute so this wasn’t entirely a surprise). 

“No fucking way,” She gasps, placing her wine glass on the floor next to his sock covered foot to hold a hand over her mouth in shock. “Did they get fired?” 

Harry nods. “Oh, instantly. I actually didn’t even know about it until we had a crew dinner and a roadie mentioned it to his friend.” 

“That’s so crazy. I wonder what they’re doing now.” 

A beat passes, both of them thinking in silence. 

Another beat. 

As if they were telepathically connected, they cock their heads to each other at the same time. “Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” 

Harry’s eyes are wide. “We find their social media accounts?” 

“Yes!” She screams, moving to place the wine glasses onto the coffee table, swiveling in her place to lay against Harry’s chest. Harry budges up a little, moving the both of them forward and leaning back to lay them down in a relaxed position. He winds his arms around her waist, hands resting on her stomach. 

After scrolling through the accounts for a little bit, Y/N’s breath began to even out slightly, her arms falling down toward her stomach. The second her hands made contact with her stomach, she startled awake, moving a bit with the way Harry’s chest bellowed as he breathed a laugh. “Okay, time f’a nap, m’baby.” 

She hums, twisting in place to lay her chest on Harry’s, her head resting on his shoulder. She weaved one hand up into his hair and twisted his chestnut waves in her fingers. “I love you, baby.”

[brf-rumortrackinganon]

The main thing that I have found so frustrating regarding the BRF’s handling of H and M is they always seem to be on their back foot. Seriously, they have courtiers, RPO, M-15 and other people working for them and they didn’t know she was working on a Vogue cover, Gayle King interview at baby’s birth, merching like crazy and the faux royal tour to Nigeria? It makes the RF look weak - especially when Charles puts out his pity PR.

It’s Charles that looks weak on this. The BRF, especially KP and William, look pretty strong by comparison.

Hear me out.

From all the reporting, the BRF at-large was aware of what Meghan was doing. They just couldn’t stop it preemptively (that’s the power of her race card and a spoiled twat for a husband) and had to wait for it to play out publicly first so they could respond publicly with protocols.

They asked her repeatedly about the September Vogue, suggesting they heard something, but Meghan kept lying about it.

They knew she was merching because they sent cease-and-desists and pulled ads down. The palace and their aides know PR. They may not know Hollywood/American PR, but they know the game generally well enough that someone knew what she was doing with the merch. (And don’t forget that Sophie was a PR exec when she married Edward so she knew things as well.)

They knew she was talking to Oprah and Gayle because they asked Meghan point-blank about it once (surprise, she lied) and they refused to let her dial into Sandringham Summit over fears that she’d record it without their knowledge.

They were probably aware she was cooking something up for Archie’s birth. Did they know the true extent? Probably not, but they knew something was up, hence the disorganized media briefings on May 6, 2019 - per Bower, the Sussexes didn’t plan to say or do anything about Archie’s birth until Gayle King had arrived. Reading between the lines in both Bower and Spare, it sounds like the palace caught wind of something and made the usual announcements to take the steam out of the Americans breaking the news about Archie’s birth.

I suspect that William and Kate saw this writing on the wall, and that’s why they worked so hard to get the Sussexes out of the Royal Foundation and out of Kensington Palace as quickly as they did. They were fully aware of Meghan’s “I do what I want and you can’t stop me” attitude from the engagement and knew they had to act quickly to protect not just their future authority but their current reputations. And it appears to have worked: all the blowback for what the Sussexes did landed on Clarence House and now Charles looks extraordinarily weak because he’s always reacting (vs KP, who shows strength through control).

[st4rg1rl-16]

━━ ✶✶˖° 𝗖𝗛𝗔𝗣𝗧𝗘𝗥 𝗧𝗛𝗥𝗘𝗘 | 𝗡𝟰𝗦.

𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴(𝘀) ━ 2019 to 2023!f1 grid x driver!female oc

𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆 ━ lewis responds to what arabella said in drive to survive starting a little rivalry between them

𝗱𝗮𝘁𝗲 ━ 2019, 31st march

𝗹𝗼𝗰𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 ━ manama, bahrein

𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀 ━ angst because bella tries to push everyone away, lewis being confusing and cursing

𝗮𝘂𝘁𝗵𝗼𝗿 𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲 ━ not an accurate description of a race (i don't really know how to write that so this will do) btw seb is not going to be in the grid until 2021 bc you know we need that seat for bella but he will appear so don't worry

𝘁𝗮𝗴𝗹𝗶𝘀𝘁 ━ @namgification @louvrepool @d3kstar @omgsuperstarg @whoselly @yl90

• — need for speed’s masterlist

HER leg, clad in the red race suit, moved up and down. She bit the inside of her left cheek and played with the sleeve of her shirt. She was in her garage sitting on a bench that she had found, her car surrounded by her mechanics was not far from her.

She looked around her: this was definitely different from Formula Two.

Today was her second race in Formula One and for some reason she was nervous unlike the first one in which she felt nothing but excitement and adrenaline. Yesterday she qualified in fifth place so she had a good chance of winning or at least getting on the podium which was good news but the spaniard couldn't help but self-sabotage and think that she wasn't going to win.

Her anxiety began to take hold in her stomach and she couldn't help but think about her teammate. Last night they had confessed their feelings to each other and between kisses and whispers they fell asleep, which was special for her but when Arabella opened her eyes and quietly slipped out of the room to get ready to go to the circuit, reality crashed into her, giving her a slap all over the face.

Now she was in a relationship? –They hadn’t come to anything since they didn’t had time to talk but let's leave it at that– with her teammate which, according to the small print of their contract, was strictly prohibited so if they were discovered they could be fired in addition to the fact that it would be a scandal, they would call her everything and they would surely believe that it would be a point in favor of why there should be no women in Formula One and she knew that, unfortunately, Charles, just because he was a man, would not come out as badly as her.

She covered her face with her hands trying to block out the light and took in as much air as her lungs would allow before releasing it again. She had to talk to Charles and make things clear, but first she had to forget about that and focus on her career.

She called herself a fool in the four languages she knew. She was supposed to be smart, she had to think things through, know in advance all the possible scenarios that could arise as a result of her actions. She couldn't make mistakes, she was in the spotlight of thousands of people. She was Arabella Torres, the girl who had make it to Formula One at just eighteen years old and who was causing a sensation in the world of sports. She couldn't allow herself to make mistakes, not after everything she had suffered to get to where she was now, not after everything she had said. She couldn't make a fool of herself like that.

She would be a shame to her family, her friends and most of all to the women around the world that she represented. She wanted to make history and change it, she wanted to be the one who made the path easier for others but she couldn't do it if two months after debuting she was caught with her partner's tongue down her throat.

"Fuck," she cursed in a whisper in spanish, removing her hands from her face. Some leather moccasins were present in her field of vision, she looked up, meeting Alexander, her man of the radio, looking at her cautiously.

“You seem worried, are you okay?” The man, who was in his fifties and reminded her of her grandfather, asked.

She shook her head, releasing a sigh that she didn't know she contained. She faked a small smile "I'm a little nervous about starting in fifth position."

“You'll do well, I'm sure” He placed his hand on her shoulder and gave her a couple of pats as a sign of support “Who knows, maybe you'll win this race.”

"I wish" her smile changed to a real one, winning would definitely make her day better.

The half brit half italian smiled back, tightening his grip on her shoulder before letting go and pointing to his ears. “Don't worry, I'll be with you.”

She smiled tenderly before opening her mouth to answer him but she was interrupted when she heard one of the mechanics say Charles' name, then she heard the others greet him as well. Immediately her leg resumed moving up and down on her spot.

Mierda. Shit.

A couple of minutes later the green-eyed man was walking towards her offering her a smile that she could swear was worth a million euros. She reciprocated timidly and lowered her gaze when he finally reached her side.

For his part, Charles felt that at any moment he was going to throw up butterflies. He took advantage of the fact that she diverted her gaze to the ground to observe her better, the sleeves of her race suit were tied to her waist, leaving her fireproof shirt that hugged her body to view, highlighting her figure, her dark hair was tied in a low ponytail, she was not wearing makeup, leaving seeing circles under her eyes that confirmed that what happened last night hadn’t been a dream and that it had actually happened.

“You left without saying anything” He leaned towards her and whispered so that no one else would hear him.

She felt how her cheeks began to heat up and how the feeling of guilt began to settle in her chest “I woke up and couldn’t go back to sleep so I went to my room. I didn't want to wake you up” She lifted her right leg and bent it, drawing it toward her body and then placed her chin on against her knee so she could see him better. She furrowed his eyebrows “Are you angry?”.

He shook his head slightly earning a sigh of relief from her to which he laughed extending his arm to gently caress her back. It was true, he wasn't angry but he would have liked to wake up with her in his arms.

“You start in fifth position, how do you feel?”.

“I think I will get on the podium”.

“Oh, yeah?” He smiled, raising both eyebrows in a mocking tone to which she smiled amused “Do you think you'll beat me? I have the pole”.

She liked talking to Charles, he made her feel calm and helped her escape from her tedious reality. The monegasque, apart from being handsome and a good driver, was also a good person. He was the type of person who looked for a way to make you feel good and comfortable, that he adapted to the person with whom he had a conversation, taking into account what to talk about and what not to talk about. That was one of the things she liked about him.

“Mmmh, you'll see, Leclerc” She wrapped her fingers in the laces of her shoe and nodded, smiling at him mockingly, playing along.

The boy stared at her for a few seconds without saying anything, his gaze traveled quickly from her eyes to her lips and back again before leaning towards her again to speak in a low voice “You don't know how much I want to kiss you right now”.

"Charles!" She reprimanded him in a whisper, placing her hand on the boy's face and pushing his head back. She laughed because she thought it was funny but she tried to hide it "We shouldn't talk about that in public."

He rolled his eyes regretfully “Right.”

An applause was heard, drawing the attention of both, Arabella hurriedly released the monegasque's head when she saw Mattia Binotto approaching them at a quick pace.

“Good morning, guys!” A big smile covered the lips of the man with glasses “I hope you slept well because today we need you to have energy”.

They both shared a look and smiled slightly.

Wow, so sneaky.

“Charles, you are in pole position which is fantastic. I'm proud” He praised the boy who smiled and responded with a thank you. His gaze shifted to the girl, who shrank in her place somewhat nervously "And you, Arabella, are doing so well Fifth position in your second race! Great, simply great”.

“Thank you very much, sir,” She smiled politely. She felt the tension expelling from her body little by little.

He pushed up his left sleeve revealing a watch that looked like it was worth quite a bit of money and looked at it before covering it again "Well, I'm pretty busy today and since I won't be able to talk to you the rest of the day I wanted to wish you both luck” They both let out a thank you again, this time in unison making him laugh “By the way, I know you both want to win but whatever happens we will be happy and proud. See you guys”.

And without further ado he left, leaving them alone again.

“He was acting a little strange, don't you think?” With a frown and looking in the direction where the team principal had disappeared.

“A little, yes” He played it off, taking his phone out of his pocket to look at the time.

It was already eleven thirty in the morning.

“What are you going to do until lunch?” He locked the phone and returned it to his pocket while he mentally reviewed his agenda.

“I have a couple of interviews for a DAZN Spain. What about you?”.

"I don't know yet, I'll look for Emma and ask her" He shrugged and looked around the workshop in case he saw the publicist near her. When he confirmed that the woman wasn’t there, he turned to his team mate “Do you want to eat together?".

"Sure" She agreed before her own publicist approached her. She nodded when she told her that it was time for the interviews and she got up from the red metal bench, looked at the boy and raised her head in dismissal "I'll send you a text when I'm done."

He gave her a thumbs up, smiling at her, and stood up too, ready to go to his part of the garage and find his publicist.

Arabella looked at Elvira, her publicist, trying to look for any sign that she suspected something about the two drivers but the black-haired woman was too absorbed in her phone. She wrinkled her nose looking away from her trying not to be caught staring.

“Well, Albert Fabrega will interview you. It won't be anything out of the ordinary: he'll ask you how the car feels, if you think you'll win, he'll talk about your position in the standings and little else” She finally took her gaze off the phone, taking her index finger to her black-rimmed glasses, pushing them towards her face.

“Okay, and then?” She accepted the bottle of water that a Ferrari assistant offered her, thanked him with a smile when he walked next to her with an umbrella in his hand ready to cover her from the scorching sun.

“You'll talk to the DAZN Spain team for a while and ehm….” She looked again at the electronic device in her hands “There are some rich fans who have access to the paddock, you will take a couple of photos with them and you will sign whatever they want you to sign, then you can go to eat. You will met Charles for lunch, right?”.

“Yes” She began to unscrew the cap of the bottle and then take a good sip. She laughed "Do you know that the other day a girl asked me to sign her boobs?".

"Ew" Elvira made a disgusted face before waving her right hand "I'm so glad I'm not famous sometimes, anyway I think it's good that you go to lunch with Charles, so we can know where you are. I'll make sure Lando stays away from you, I don't want you two to start playing again” She looked at her accusingly over her glasses and she laughed guiltily, knowing she was referring to when she and the McLaren driver got together on Friday, playing tag and by accident they broke a sign.

They spent half an hour apologizing to Red Bull for tearing in half a poster with Pierre's face, who didn’t hesitate to make a dramatic scene about the situation.

But what could they do, after all they were just children.

“I THINK I have a good chance of getting on the podium today, I'm starting fifth so...” She shrugged, giving the camera a toothless smile. Her right hand held the microphone they had given her while her left held her body against the railing that separated the drivers from the press.

The journalist nodded “And what about your rivalry with Hamilton? As you said in Drive to Survive, you will do everything possible to beat him”.

That wasn't in the plan. She bit the inside of her cheek and swayed slightly wrapping her right foot around her left leg. “Yes, I said that but I don't have any rivalry with Hamilton other than, well, the typical one on the track that I have with all the drivers”.

“Don't you know what Hamilton has said about you?” The question left her frozen and for a moment she was worried but quickly composed herself and denied, looking out of the corner of her eye at her publicist and manager, who looked at her just as confused as she was before taking out their phones. The interviewer approached her, handing her his phone; it showed an article from the spanish newspaper Marca which about her and the champion.

She read the headline "Hamilton makes it clear that he is not worried about Torres" and she frowned as she watched the Mercedes driver's words being recited more quietly.

"I don't think she's a rival for me."

“Do you have anything to say about that?” Because she had tucked the microphone under her arm so she could grab the phone, the journalist brought his own microphone closer to her face. She opened her mouth to respond but nothing came out. "In the Melbourne GP you didn't get close to him, finishing in eighth place when he was second. Do you think you'll beat him today?".

She glanced at Elvira and Nicholas again, who shook their heads but she ignored them. “He can say whatever he wants. I'm not going to say that I'm going to beat him today because no one, much less me, knows what's going to happen today, but if I don't beat him today I know that one day I will. Maybe not today or tomorrow but one day I will and rest assured I will take the title from him.”

A smile was planted on the man's lips when he heard her. “Thank you, Arabella. That's all”.

“Thanks to you” She gave him a small smile that didn’t hide her annoyance and, after extending the microphone to the sound people, she turned around and walked away from there. In a second her publicist, her manager, the assistant with the umbrella and the Netflix team were at her side struggling to keep up with her.

Both adults looked at each other while the poor assistant was sweating profusely trying to hide it from the sun.

“Arabella...” She raised a hand stopping the woman, who with her mouth open looked at the girl's manager.

"I don't want to talk now, Elvira” She growled, heading to her room, ignoring everyone she found in her way. When she got to her room she locked herself in, putting the latch on, slamming the door in the faces of both adults.

The blonde knocked on the door. "Bells, don't lock yourself in. Talk to me”.

She was pissed off, very pissed off. One of her idols had underestimated her in public and she didn't understand why. Lewis seemed to be kind and good, she hadn't had the luck –or, now, misfortune– to talk to him yet but still the champion never failed to give her a smile when their eyes met. Was it all for appearances?.

She clenched her jaw, feeling how the tears of rage and frustration began to accumulate in her eyes, pushing against each other eagerly to slide down her cheeks. She swallowed and let her knees give way, causing her back to slide against the door until she was sitting on the floor.

It wasn't the first time they talked bad about her, it wasn't the first time someone was condescending towards her but damn, when he was one of the people you admire most in the world, it definitely hurt more than anything.

The sound of a notification rang from her pocket, she wanted to ignore it but she knew that it was most likely Charles looking for her to eat. Swallowing her tears, she took the phone out of her pocket and looked at the time, there were less than two hours left until the race, she had to go eat.

A single notification occupied the screen confirming her suspicions upon seeing the Monegasque's name.

She smiled though her smile warped into a pout as she felt a sob run down her throat. She suddenly felt worthless and that she didn't deserve anything that was happening to her. She closed her eyes tightly, smashing the palm of her hand against her mouth, trying to silence the sob. She wasn't going to cry, she didn't want to cry, she couldn't cry. She had to be strong.

“Ma belle?” She heard a knock on the door and then she could hear the boy's shy voice. She shook her head, she didn't want to be seen like that, much less for Charles to see her like that. My beautiful.

She stood up, leaving the phone on the floor and hurried to grab the box of clinex that she had in the television cabinet. She blew her nose and wiped her eyes with the sleeve of her shirt before walking to the door and bent down to pick up the phone, opening the camera app and looking at herself on the screen. She was more or less presentable.

"Bella, please," she heard him speak again, this time with a pleading tone “Can I come in?".

She took a breath in and out before faking a smile and opening the door, finding Nick, Elvira, and Charles behind it. The three of them were looking at her with concern.

“Well, are we going to eat or what?” She smiled wider before leaving the room and passing between them ready to head to Ferrari's cafeteria.

The three looked at each other and Nicholas let out a sigh, running a hand over his face before looking at the boy dressed in red. "Go to her, she won't want to talk to us."

The driver nodded before starting to run in the direction of the girl. When he was close to her he wrapped his hand around her wrist and pulled her up, making her stop. "Hey, what just happened there?".

"Nothing, I got angry, I calmed down and that's it" Charles frowned in denial when he saw her smile that could be seen for miles that was false, he was beginning to get annoyed with her "everything is fine" attitude.

“I was in my room when you arrived, you were going like the devil was chasing you. I also heard the door slam. Don't lie to me, Arabella” The false smile that was on her lips fell to the ground as soon as she heard him, she looked around them. Some of the staff watched them talk.

She gently released herself from his grasp. “It's not a good idea to talk here, Charles.”

"I don't give a shit," It surprised her because, to be honest, since she knew him she hadn’t seen him like this, much less heard him curse. He continued, "You can't throw a fit, worry everyone, worry me, and then act like nothing happened. That's not how things work, Arabella.”

She looked at him in silence, he was right but she wasn't going to give that to him. She didn't like to talk about her feelings, much less when they were bad ones.

Charles looked at her too, waiting for her to say something, anything. He wanted her to open up to him, to trust him with her feelings like she had done last night, she wanted him to know that he was there for her.

"See you on the podium," She then told him in a serious tone, after she turned around and disappeared.

SITTING in her car she felt like a king although the looks of the mechanics around her made her feel like she was a bomb about to explode. They looked at her, talked and even were cautious around her.

Apparently the word had spread..

She glued her gaze to the halo that surrounded her, the famous phrase "I feel the need, the need for speed" was printed in white letters. She clenched her jaw when she saw the cameras pointed in her direction, she knew that tomorrow people would be talking about her face.

Her tight jaw that highlighted her features and her intense gaze fixed on her halo would be something to talk about the next day. Some would say she looked attractive, other would would criticize her.

Fuck them.

Nicholas approached her with her helmet and the balaclava in her hands. He held them out to her and she took them. She looked at her helmet and with her index finger caressed the black 9 that stood out among the red and white.

Out of the corner of her eye she saw how the six foot man squatted next to her car to get a better look at her. "Good luck, speed. We are with you.”

The smallest smile of hers was present at her nickname and she raised her gloved hand formed into a fist, soon she felt the man's fist collide with hers.

“Arabella, you're out in five!” She heard someone shout and nodded, putting on her balaclava, someone helped her put on her hans and her helmet. She closed her eyes as she quickly crossed herself.

She pursed her lips thinking about her family. It had only been twenty minutes since she had called her mother to talk to them and say her goodbyes, something she always did before a race since she had that accident. She said goodbye to them in case she didn't leave the track alive, her parents weren't happy about it but she needed it, she needed to tell them that she loved them just in case she couldn't tell them again in person.

She watched as Charles' car pulled out of his garage as the lead car passed in front of them. She felt a small sting in her chest, she pressed her lips together knowing well that it was her fault. They hadn't spoken again since their "argument", they hadn't even eaten together like they had talked about in the morning.

She felt bad for pushing him away but she couldn't help it, she was like that despite herself.

Her jaw clenched again when she saw the black and white car pass by. She was going to win or at least get on the podium so she could shut up the Brit. She was willing to make her life in that race hell. She was going to make him fight for first place.

She watched as the flag in front of her lowered and hurriedly stepped on the accelerator to leave the garage. She followed Bottas being followed by Verstappen.

She took a deep breath, tightening her grip on the steering wheel. Well, here we go.

“Arabella?” She heard Alexander's voice on the radio “Can you hear me?”.

"I hear you," she replied without taking her eyes off the end of Valtteri's car.

She swallowed and lowered the visor of her helmet. The silence embraced her completely, the only thing she could hear was her own breathing. And then every red light turned green in a blink.

Lights out and away we go!

She tried to overtake Bottas but the Red Bull driver tried the same with her. She clicked her tongue when she felt the Dutchman's car pull up to hers.

"Get him off or you'll crash." She heard the man in her ears and she opened her eyes obviously, she wanted to respond with a sarcastic comment but knowing that the communication was being recorded she decided to remain silent.

“Copy” she tried to get away from him but in less than a second Verstappen was already next to her again. She cursed under her breath.

It seems that Verstappen is not making it easy for Torres.

“Not today, Max. Not today, damn it”.

“Carlos is trying to pass, take advantage of it and pass Verstappen” she nodded to herself and prepared to accelerate, she watched as Carlos made space to the left of the Red Bull car, causing the three cars to be stuck together, covering the entire road. When on the 33rd she saw that Sainz was trying to pass, she stuck to him, leaving Arabella alone, she pressed the accelerator and drove away from them “Very good, Bella!”.

She quickly passed Bottas. Her eyes fell on the other Mercedes not far from her Ferrari. Her right corner rose and she tilted her chin down decisively.

And Arabella passes Valtteri, thus remaining in P4. Will she get through to Hamilton?

She suddenly began to lose control of her car making her panic “I'm losing control!”

She felt how the car spun around on itself “Fuck, fuck, fuck!”

She turned the wheel trying to get the car back on track, praying that neither Verstappen nor Sainz would approach her and take her in front of her.

She wasn't ready to die.

She's losing control! Verstappen approaches her with Grosjean close, that could end very badly.

She tightened her grip on the steering wheel and, swerving, managed to turn around and get the vehicle back on track. She sighed, her eyes so wide it seemed like they were going to pop out of it's sockets.

"Arabella, are you okay?!" She heard several voices coming from the radio, she distinguished Alexander's and Mattias's, she also thought she heard Nick in the distance.

"I'm fine," she confirmed and the sea of red polo shirts sighed with relief in the Ferrari garage. "I'm going to overtake Magnussen."

"Copy"

While she was losing control of the car, Hamilton had managed to pass the Haas driver and was now trying to pass the other Ferrari in the lead.

She approached the black and gold car applying a tactic similar to the one the Dutchman had applied with her, approaching from his left on the curve trying to intimidate him.

"Press as much as you can" she heard commotion from Alexander's side and frowned.

"What's happening?."

"It's Charles." Her heart skipped a beat and she immediately thought the worst. Worry filled her body.

"What happened to him? Is he okay?"

"He had a problem and he had to box, he will be out in a second. It's okay, don't worry, you keep going like this and we'll see if we can get you up to p2" he tried to distract her from the topic of her teammate.

"He doesn't get tired," she warned and the man nodded, watching her car from her screen.

"Keep pushing, you're going to pass through the pit exit in no time. Take advantage of the fact that Charles is going out and pass him."

"Okay"

She followed the instructions given to her and continued alongside the Haas car until they passed the pit exit. She calmed down when she saw the other Ferrari approaching to enter the track again.

Between the two red cars they caged the danish and Arabella took the opportunity to overtake. With her right hand she greeted her teammate, earning a return greeting before losing sight of him.

They quickly left the black car behind and were left alone, looking for Lewis.

And the two Ferraris are going wheel to wheel after Leclerc's problem! They are fighting for p2, what a show Ferrari is giving us today! .

She smiled competitively and accelerated trying to overtake her teammate but he also overtook although he couldn't overtake too much because apparently the problem he had had before had taken its toll on the car and it was difficult for him to do the overtake.

"P2 Arabella, you're up on the podium!" She heard the British man's shout and laughed in disbelief. Had the race already finished?.

"Good job, guys," she congratulated those who were listening to her from the garage with a smile on her face. She parked the car in the second space and took a deep breath before getting out.

She heard the screams of the fans in the stands and soon saw a sea of red polo shirts approaching her with screams. She was turned around and she was enveloped in a hug, she immediately knew it was Charles as she felt another hoof rest against hers.

"You've done it!" She heard him say, "I'm very proud of you, ma belle."

She smiled under the helmet before feeling multiple hands touch her back, arms, and helmet.

She raised her visor and saw her staff. Someone helped her take off her hans and she quickly took off her helmet and balaclava. Her hair flew loose, freeing herself from the hair band that fell to the floor when she tore off her balaclava.

The shouts of the tifosi among the stands increased when she saw her face revealed and she once again felt like a king on top of the world.

Her ear-to-ear smile shivered as she watched the winner approach her. She looked at him suspiciously as she raised her hand in front of her body. Lewis gave him a small smile. “Congratulations, you did good.”

She raised an eyebrow, looking down at her hand and accepting it in hers.

[yenqa]

POEMS IN VERSE(S)

sypnosis — you meet jay randomly on a subway, and soon your conversation turns into more than just the silly poem book he’s reading

warnings — profanities, mentions of insecurities, angst, they’re so gross (in a “i’m jealous” way), food/eating/drinking, lmk if there are any more :)

pairing — jay x fem!reader

word count — 3.8k+

yen’s note — i worked very hard on this and i’m pretty happy with this so i hope u enjoy :) also this is a scheduled post

Spring Break, 2019

You counted down the amount of days it would be until you turned 17.

17 was the golden age—Or at least it was supposed to be. But the thrill of turning a new age was over by the next 15 minutes. Your big smile that had originally been processing the newfound year of your life slowly dropped, as your age didn’t really matter much to anyone else than your mom or dad.

17 was when you first realized that people didn’t really care as much as you thought they did. No one would care if your hair was slightly frizzy and tangled from the light wash of rain or the fact that you enjoy reading and writing poetry.

You realized no one cared, but it was hard to stop believing it.

So, you brought a hairbrush around, or quickly hid your journal and pen anytime someone got close to you. 

You’re still 17. And you still felt like how you felt 15 minutes after midnight. You felt dull. Washed-out. And the rainy season hasn't helped enlighten your mood at all.

You decided to take an impulsive day trip south, to the buzzing city of Seattle, and also wanting to take a break from everyone and the life you knew. You rushed to the subway, the tote bag that hung on your shoulder had collided with your body every step you took.

You stand right in front of the entrance, scanning the cart to see one empty seat. Sitting down, you address your surroundings, trying to read if maybe it would be a better idea to stand.

Next to you was a man around your age. Silently reading a book with a familiar cover. Staring at the book longer than you realize, you can see the man next to you no longer focused on the book, but you.

“Oh—I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to be staring, I just recognized the book, Lee Jieun right?”

You almost dreamily sigh every time she’s mentioned. Lee Jieun had been your favorite author for longer than you can remember, one of your favorites by her being the one the unnamed man happened to have been reading.

“Do you know her?” He asks.

Looking up at you he jerks his head to the left, his light brown hair moves out of his eyes revealing his full face. You almost forget to answer the question, busy goggling at the sight of him. His eyes laid in yours, awaiting your answer patiently.

“Yeah, I-um she’s one of my favorites actually.”

His eyes subtly check you out, you quickly realize how stupid you must’ve looked with the amount of frizz in your hair from the light drizzle outside. Slowly but not too obviously, you bring your hands up, brushing through whatever you could. Explaining to the man that the book he was reading was one of your favorite poem books. Accidently sharing that you look up to her poems and hope to have the ability to write and share your writing as inspiration for others.

He listens intently, before asking, “You write?”

Your ears grow warm as you answer every question he asks. An unusual thing that happens to you. The conversation grows into each other's lives. And you feel as if you know every part of him as he continues to talk. 

Park Jongseong is his name but his English name is Jay.  His favorite color is green. He likes fashion and cooking. He enjoys autumn and poetry as much as you do. He’s allergic to cats—which is a shame considering the amount of cat hair over your bag that you discreetly try to brush off while he’s talking. His favorite ice cream flavor is Pistachio and he’s not a huge fan of mint chocolate.

You’d usually argue that mint chocolate is the perfect flavor for a hot summer day but you keep quiet, just this once.

Something must’ve snuck into your brain and rewired it because you don’t seem to mind him knowing that you write. In fact you even offer to let him see your works. He reads each word intently, as if it was the most shocking news of the year. 

His favorite is the one you spent the most time on. But it didn't feel as if it was your best work. You didn’t keep quiet about that fact, you hesitated to even let him read that page, but the one line seemed to have piqued his interest. Almost as if his eyes had been glued onto the small stanza.

Together we’re complete

Our perfect harmony 

is truly beautiful.

You were always one to believe in soulmates, or finding someone that perfectly fit next to you. Like the final piece to your complicated puzzle. Your belief often appeared in your writings. Hoping that maybe one day, you’ll meet the missing piece from your board. That day hadn’t come yet. But you were counting down the days just as if you were about to turn 17 again.

“I like that line. What does it mean?” He asks.

“I don’t know, it just sounded right.”

That’s a lie. You know exactly what it means to you. But even as comfortable as you had felt with Jongseong. It was something too personal to share.

If you could name anyone who was the biggest sucker for romance you would name yourself. But it’s been 17 years, and you don’t even think that it was a possible option for you. Sure, you hoped to find your soulmate. But your soulmate could’ve easily been a truly platonic one. And you were losing hope for any romance coming your way. Writing about romance made you feel as if the small ball of hope was still there, and you just had to wait for the right time. 

Those 17 years had told you that you couldn’t be loved. No matter how hard you tried, or even begged. This epiphany randomly hit you in the middle of buzzing parties or small group hangouts, the thought of nobody ever loving, let alone liking you constantly consumed you. Constantly bringing down your mood. That’s why you’re so fond of the idea of soulmates. Because soulmates are perfectly perfect together, and that's ensured by the universe.

He lets out a chuckle, with an understanding nod. Skimming through the small notebook you handed him.

“Why are you heading to Seattle?” You ask as he finishes, placing the notebook neatly in your bag. His mouth parts slightly, carefully choosing what to say. “I’m just taking a day trip, wanted to go explore alone.”

A small smile breaks out of you. “Would you want to travel around Seattle together?”

Jongseong lets your smile grow onto his lips, accepting your bold offer.

The conversation ends and he reopens his book, continuing the page he was on. The ride still had at least thirty minutes to go, and you didn’t want to use all your phone battery now.

You glance over to his book, cursing at yourself for forgetting to bring something to do other than play the stupid games on your phone. He silently reads as your head moves to his shoulder, laying it down and reading with him. You can feel him flinch ever so slightly, his shoulders relax before he moves the book over to the middle of you two, not uttering a word while doing so.

“Thank you,” Your voice is barely above a whisper, and you’re not sure if he even heard it until he responds.

After around 45 minutes the subway comes to a stop and you tap Jongseong, pointing at the moving text on the sign to show you that you’re at your destination. He hastily picks up his stuff, grabbing your hand and walking out the doors. 

“Where do we go?” You ask, looking around for any sort of sign that states the direction.

“Just follow me, I've been here a few times.” His warm hand leads you through the busy people trying to get in, pushing through the loads of people heading towards the small amount of doors in the cart. Jongseong looks back every so often, making sure the hand he’s holding isn’t a ghost. Your eyes lock, and you show him a small smile of appreciation. He smiles back, raising his eyebrows before turning back around, leading you through the clusters.

Finally, you walk up the stairs, stepping into the daylight. Still hand in hand, you use your off hand to cover your eyes from the shade. “Didn’t think it would be so sunny after all the rain this month,” You squint at the bright sky, looking over to Jongseong. He’s rummaging through his bag, pulling out a small box, opening it to reveal sunglasses. You chuckle at how prepared he is, until he places the sunglasses on you. 

Your stomach erupts in butterflies as your mouth parts slightly, a smile grows on his face. “Oh no, keep them. I don’t need them” You hastily take off the sunglasses, handing them to him. He takes them, putting them back on you. You’re about to protest when he says. “Stop—just take them. I want you to wear them,” He mumbles. 

You smile at him, “Thank you Seong.” The nickname comes out naturally, like you’ve known him for years. He smiles, looking away to hide the growing redness of his cheeks. You let out a breathy laugh, covering the bottom half of your face to hide the flustered state you’re in.

“Where do you wanna go?” He asks with a shy smile still planted on his face. You shrug, answering, “I have no idea. Do you have any ideas?” 

His smile becomes less shy and somehow forms into a slight smirk “I have an idea.” his hands encase yours once again, and he whisks you two off to the unknown direction. 

The walk is around twenty minutes, but it goes by quickly. While you two are racing to see who can hit the crosswalk button, you notice the crowds of people around the big red letters stating, “Seattle’s Farmers Market.”

You squeal, a hand coming up to cover your mouth. “I’ve always wanted to go here! You’re like a mindreader, Seong.”

With his other hand he pinches your cheek, squeezing your hand and leading you to the entrance. The growing crowd of the market pushes you to bump into each other every so often,  you both laugh it off, placing your attention to whatever shop you’re checking out.

Coming across a tropical fruits stand, you start looking around, picking up a tray every so often. Not realizing the missing warmth from your hand, you scan the selection of fruits. Picking up a Rambutan, you move the tray around, trying to see if the fruit will be worth the price. You’re eye level with the fruit until you feel a tap on your shoulder.

You whirl around, to see Jongseong. A big grin planted on his face as he revealed why he’s smiling so much.  A bouquet of tulips, wrapping in brown paper with twine wrapped around it waiting for you to take. But you’re frozen—Did he really just buy flowers for you?

He thrusts his hands out towards you, gesturing for you to  take them. You let out a giggle, taking the brown wrapped plants out of his hands. “Gosh you’re so sweet. What did I do to deserve all of this?” You ask, the corners of your mouth slowly upturn when you look at the flowers, admiring the arrangement of light pink tulips. “Can’t I spoil you?” He responds smoothly, not letting you respond before linking your arms and heading to the next stalls.

Passing—What felt like hundreds of stalls, your feet started to cramp up. Both of you decide to take a break and sit down, finding a cafe nearby. You order for the both of you and pay—Which he strongly protests but you feel too bad for him spending too much money on you. Sitting down you let out a sigh, finally letting your feet take the much needed rest.

You two make small talk, talking about your favorite shops or something you wish you had bought. When the barista calls out your name you shoot out of your seat, exchanging a glance with Jongseong before walking over, thanking the lady and grabbing your drinks.

A wave of comfortable silence washes over you two as you try your drinks, glancing out the huge window by your table. You watch as families, couples, or just one person pass by that window. Trying to figure out something about them as they quickly pass by. 

After an hour of quiet conversations of whatever intrigues you, you decide to leave the cafe. Dinner time was approaching and you wanted to beat the rush. Surprisingly, you both quickly decide on a restaurant to go to, a nice restaurant that perfectly suited your cravings. During dinner you exchange numbers, not being able to wait for the next time you’ll see each other.

The sun starts setting when you both decide to go home, walking to the subway station hand in hand. Paying for your fare you both head on the subway, sitting down next to each other. A yawn washes over you, laying your head back and closing your eyes—It’s not like you’ll fall asleep right?

It’s a shame that you did fall asleep. You feel yourself being gently shaken awake by Jongseong. You lift your head up from his shoulder, looking around the subway. 

“Your stop is the next one. Can’t have you half asleep walking home.” He chuckles, you rub your eyes. Trying your best to stretch with the little space you have. “Thank you Seong.” You yawn, letting out a small smile.

He nods, inviting the smile from your face onto his. The subway comes to a stop once again and you look at him with a slight sadness. Planting a chaste kiss on his cheek you let out, “I had fun today, Seong. Let’s do it some time again, yeah?”

“Okay,” He says, smiling. “Text me when you get home okay?” You salute him, walking away with a lovesick smile on your face.

Jongseong holds the same one, still feeling the linger of your kiss on his cheek. He lets his hand touch his cheek, embarrassed by the amount of warmth that flooded his cheeks.

Spring, 2021

It had been around a year and a little over a half since the two of you had even talked.

You don’t know if he got a new number or randomly ghosted you. Even though you had met a bunch of times after, it seemed like he realized that he didn’t like you as much as you thought he did.

You should’ve expected it, I mean—It’s not like anybody could like you that much.

Sighing, you open the messaging app. Typing something in his chat before deleting it. Scrolling up to your old messages.

You hated the fact that you missed him even though you never even dated. You hated the fact that you thought you could be something more than just a failed situationship. You hated the fact that you thought someone could prove you wrong and that someone could love you.

But, of course. All good things came to an end. And what seemed to be like the only good thing in your life, completely ghosted you. You like to believe that he got a new number and forgot to tell you, or lost his phone and had to get a new sim card. But it still hurt.

So, everytime you thought of him, you reopened those messages, trying to reiterate the happiness you felt while texting him.

Looking down to the bottom of your phone you see the empty textbox, mocking you for opening the chat once again. You decide, What’s the harm in messaging him? Maybe he just missed your last few. Clicking on the textbox you type slowly, carefully thinking about your words before sending it.

hey, are you still there? didn’t take you for the type who ghosts girls

You sigh, deleting the text quickly. Looking over to see the ungodly hour of the night displayed on your clock you place your phone down, tucking yourself nicely under the blanket, praying to every god that maybe, he’s okay.

Autumn, 2022

“Have you heard Enhypens recent album? It’s so good!” Hanni exclaims, changing the music playing in the background to listen to the album.

“This is like a few months old, but anyways—Shout out is the best song ever, you should play that song.” Minji answers. They both look at you, asking for your opinion. “Who’s Enhypen?” You ask, eyebrows furrowing as you look up from your phone.

Minji scoffs, “My seven boyfriends. Listen to this song! Isn’t it so good?”

You listened to the background, bopping your head to the upbeat guitar in the instrumental. The lyrics were sweet, and meaningful. Even though you quit poetry, words still had lot’s of meaning for you, and you loved when they found significance in songs. One guy’s voice sounds so vaguely familiar, you brush it off. You probably just saw a clip of him singing a while back and didn’t remember. Getting to the second verse you pay much attention to the lyrics. Your jaw drops hearing one of the lines.

“What’d he just say? Can you rewind a few seconds Hanni?” You ask and she shrugs, opening her phone to go back a few seconds.

Listening to the same verse again you hear those awfully familiar lyrics.

Our perfect harmony

Is truly beautiful

You know those words like the back of your hand. You wrote these exact words in a poem two or three years ago. Could this be a coincidence? Probably, right? You’re too consumed in your own thoughts to hear both of the echoes of your name, following with Hanni asking why.

Slowly pulling out your phone, you quickly search “Enhypen” into the bar. Looking at the members you scan the faces. Looking at them all you see—

Jay.

That’s Jongseong.

No way, it can’t be. Clicking on his link you’re met with a collage of images. Your body seems to be moving faster than your mind because immediately you scroll down to read the small box of information about him. Oh and of course his name is Park Jongseong too but that's a coincidence, right? Switching apps, you open a selfie you and Seong took on one of your few dates.

You feel as if your eyes will shoot out of your brain, blurting out “I know him.”

Minji and Hanni both exchange weird looks, “You know who? Enhypen? Letting out a hesitant nod, they both rush over to see Jongseong’s information box on your screen. Switching apps to show them the selfie, then each side by side.  “Y/n, you know Jay? As in Enhypen’s Jay?” Hanni gives you a bewildered look. You turn your head up to see Minju sharing the same one. Blinking profusely, you try to figure out how this is even possible. 

“Yes! Remember the guy who ghosted me like two years ago? That’s him!” You exclaim, aggressively pointing to a picture of him. Minji’s mouth opens, forming an “o”. You all sit in silence processing this information.

Breaking the silence, Minji scoffs, “You’re telling me you had a situationship with Jay Park? 

Another long silence follows, you all try to process the fact that the one you deemed as “the one who got away” was globally famous. Maybe he realized his worth, and left you. Maybe, he didn’t bother contacting you because he secretly disliked you. Or maybe he—

“Y/n, he’s coming to Seattle.”

You whip your head to the incoming voice. Instead of seeing a face, you see a phone, straight in front of you listing tour dates. You grab a hold of the phone, making sure you read the words right. “Seattle, Washington. 9/28.”

“They’re coming in a week?” You exclaim, eyes not leaving the phone for a second. Hanni rushes over and you all huddle around the phone. Your breath quickens as you process even more information. And you felt like your brain was about to explode, he would be. in city? in a week?

Hanni practically screams, shaking your shoulders harshly. She seems much more excited than you did, blabbering about how you would reunite and fall in love again. Rolling your eyes, you hand Minji back her phone. You start to question every life decision you had made in the past three years. Would he even remember you? What if it’s a different Jongseong who just happened to have the same name and look exactly like the Seong you once knew? Would you even run into him for the few days he’s there?

These thoughts circle in your brain as you lay down in bed. You thought you were over him—you weren’t even anything to begin with. Maybe it's the quickening beat of your heart to the thought of him , or the smile you hold in whenever you look back at your texts, or maybe even the loneliness you felt after him that keeps you going.

Autumn, 2022

The light breeze engulfs your body. Even though the sun seems to be blinding everywhere it’s still as chilly as ever. Looking at everyone’s outfits on the sidewalk you realize how stupid you look. Fully clothes but with sunglasses covering your eyes. Was it a necessary choice? No—but you realized that after you had left the house. It didn’t matter anyways, you could just take them off (you weren’t but it was still an option). 

Taking your lunch break you walk to the cafe around the corner from your building. Recognizing the cafe as one you visited a few years ago. You ordered the same drink you did three years ago—also ordering a sandwich to eat. You sit down at a table two tables away from the one you once sat at. Placing down your sunglasses you glance around the cafe while waiting for your food. 

Noticing a man in a baseball hat and a mask, you squint trying to see his face. Giving up seconds later and observing someone else. Eyes latching onto the pretty barista making your order. Watching as she quickly makes your sandwich and starts on your drink, not wasting a second to spare.

“I think those sunglasses are mine?” The masked man comes up to you, taking off his baseball cap. You get a better view of his eyes, recognizing the crinkle of his eyes when he smiles.

“Jay?” It’s barely above a whisper, but he still hears it.

He pulls down his mask, showing the face you once knew three years ago, but much more mature now. “Y/n, can we talk?” He sounds nervous, almost jittery. Constantly looking around at the strangers walking by.

“Yeah, of course.” The light tone of your voice calms him down every so slightly, sitting down in front of you with a lopsided smile. 

Never in your life would you have thought you’d meet a celebrity that actually wanted to talk to you, And never in your life would you expect it to be him. Seong—Your Seong, sitting in front of you, carefully selecting every word he utters to you. The one who always knew what to say, can’t seem to get the right words out.

taglist : @jwnghyuns @ja4hyvn @trsrina @redm4ri @badmuni @yeokii @enhastolemyheart @softpia @s00buwu @ox1-lovesick

hope u liked 😍

[d4yd4iry]

Sweet Memories

Pairings: Kim Minji x fem!reader

Synopsis: When life gets too hard, you go down memory lane.

Genre: Fluff…?

Minji knew that she shouldn’t be overworking herself, but how could she not when there are thousands of people ready to critique her imperfections.

It didn’t help that she let them get to her head, making her focus too much on perfecting her moves rather than enjoying herself.

But no matter how perfect something is, people will always try to find flaws. That’s just human, but that doesn’t mean that it’s okay.

Due to the growing popularity of NewJeans, the group gained many fans but with fans, comes a bunch of jobless haters. Just a bunch of snakes, waiting for a victim to spit their venom at.

It so happened that Minji became one of their many targets. Endless of cruel words being said about her, words that are not true, words that have been exaggerated to fit the narrative that they view her as.

You would know, being in the same situation as her and as well as being her supporting pillar since your trainee days. You were one of the very few kind hearted people left, a pure soul who genuinely find beauty in everything.

These past few months have been stressful for the girls, but especially for Minji who’s the oldest of the 6. Because being the oldest means that she’ll always get more criticism from the public, even if she’s not the official leader.

You have seen how bad it gets on her bad days, she wouldn’t talk much, and keeps to herself a lot. And it hurts to see because your girlfriend have been hurting and you can’t do anything to stop the source of her sorrows.

“Minji, talk to me.”

Minji have been keeping to herself for way too long, she was like a ticking bomb just waiting to explode at any moment. Everyone was worried about her, especially you.

“Please, I don’t want to talk about it.” Minji whispered as she laid on your shared bed covering herself with a blanket, with her back facing you.

You bit your lips, genuinely frustrated that you weren’t able to make her feel better. “Min, I know how hard it is for you to talk about your feelings…just know that I’m here to listen, just like what you did for me.”

She wasn’t responding but you knew that she was listening. You took a deep breathe before continuing. “Remember that night? February, 5th, 2019”

You were a trainee long before she joined the company, being one of the best trainee in the whole company.

You were all of the teacher’s favorite and was very popular amongst the trainees and staffs as well.

Minji first thought that a fellow trainee was exaggerating when they said that you were like an angel sent to earth, but soon after she met you, she could understand fully why people admired you so much.

You’re the most beautiful person she have ever met, both beautiful in and out. Many people have said that perfection doesn’t exist, but clearly they’ve never met you.

You would always be surrounded by trainees who were desperate to share a conversation with you, even a glance would make them fall on their knees.

You were very well spoken and your voice was angelic, people couldn’t help but shut themselves up whenever you talk.

But they’re also the same people who make up their own version of you. Never really intrigued enough to want to know you, the real you, and for the longest time, Minji was one of those people too.

All until one night, the night that changed everything.

[February, 5th, 2019]

It was late at night, almost everyone was out of the company by then and Minji was preparing to go too, having practiced for 8 hours straight, she was dying to enjoy the warmth of her bed.

Humming to herself as she strolled down the dark halls, chills suddenly went down her spine, the company was undeniably creepy during those times. Minji was praying that the rumored company ghost wouldn’t appear in front of her.

As she was about halfway to the elevator, sounds of someone crying reached her ears. Minji eyes went wide, heart pounding as she stopped her steps.

No this will not be how I did she thought

Minji really wanted to sprint to the elevator, maybe even jump down the flight of stairs, all to get away from the crying sound that she was sure that it’s the ghost

But her body was betraying her, her feet moving towards the room and before she could comprehend what had happened, her hands were already pushing the door to get into the room.

Minji felt her breath hitched as her eyes wandered onto the girl whose face was covered by the palm of her hands, but also feeling relieved that it wasn’t a ghost.

It was you, she could recognize you from a mile away. Probably because she spends too much time looking at your figure from afar whenever you guys are in the same room.

She felt a magnetic force pulling her towards you. Minji kneeled down and put her hands on your shoulders, you were startled at first but then your eyes soften when you realized that it was only her.

She felt her heart stop beating for a moment as she scanned your face, gosh you still looked gorgeous even while crying.

“Yn, are you okay?” To say that Minji was concerned would be an understatement, she herself doesn’t even know why her heart ached at how sad you looked.

“I wish I could say that I am, but that would be untruthful.” Your eyes were watery, an overwhelming amount of worries wandered your mind.

Minji eyes soften even more if that’s even possible, she softly caressed your hand. “I know we’re not close, and we don’t talk much either but you can talk to me.”

You took a deep breathe, you don’t know why but after looking into her genuine eyes, you felt like you could tell her anything and everything.

“It’s just that everything and everyone have been so overwhelming, the teachers they are always expecting the best out of me and are always putting so much pressure, I mean I thrive in pressure but it’s always way too much whenever they bragged and compared me to other trainees, and the other trainees…they talk. I don’t understand why I care so much about what they discussed about me, but I do. I don’t think they know that I heard what they’ve been saying about me either…”

“What have they been saying about you?”

“They talk behind my back, saying that I’m a show off, that I’m doing too much, desperate for attention, they call me names, they mock me…but the thing that I don’t understand is how could they be so different when they’re in front of me, they act as if we are friends, almost had me fooled…sorry for ranting to you, I just needed to get this out of my chest and thank you for listening it means a lot.”

All of the things you’ve said surprised her, for the longest time she thought that everyone loved you. How could she not when on the surface they would do anything to try to impress you, but if only she knew how two faced those people are.

Minji wished that she could beat the crap out of whoever talked bad about you, it disgusted her that even for an angel like you, they would still be able to make up shit to talk about.

She still couldn’t understand why would they think that way about someone like you, a person who never talked back to anyone, always too kind that may be deemed as a pushover, soft spoken, you were just too perfect for them and it makes you a threat.

“People are cruel and we can’t do anything about that, but you did not deserve to receive their cruelty.” Minji softly muttered as she used her palm to lift your face up, her eyes stuck onto yours.

“Yn, you are genuinely the kindest person I’ve known and I do not understand why people think it’s a good reason to step on you for that. But take my word when I say that you’ll be far more successful than them, they can stay mad, jealous, and miserable. But you are a star, you shine wherever you go, even in the darkest room, you’ll be able to shine. So cheer up, I miss your smile!”

For the first time in very long time, you finally felt genuinely happy, a smile slowly making way onto your face. “Aha! Come on get up, let’s go do something fun!” Minji felt proud of herself as she got you to get up with a smile on your face, slowly forgetting your sadness.

“What is something you do when you want to feel like yourself again?”

“Hmm?” You pondered for a moment before a bigger smile appeared on your face. “I have something, come on I’ll show you!” Your voice and face were filled with excitement as you dragged the older girl with you.

The two of you laughed along the way, about nothing in particular, it was just the right mood to laugh.

“Ta-dah!”

“This is yours?!” Her jaw dropped as you both were standing in front of your precious motorcycle.

“Yeah, it used to be my dad’s but he doesn’t ride it anymore.” You informed before looking at Minji with a smirk on your face. “Surprised?”

“Yeah, I mean you don’t look like someone who ride motorcycles.”

“What does motorcycle riders look like exactly?” You looked at her with a teasing smile and then laughed once she couldn’t find the words to explain.

“Sorry that was stupid, I mean you look soft and well people who ride motorcycles at least in movies, are usually-“ As she was about to finish her sentence, you interrupted with a big and goofy grin. “Big and scary?”

“Yes! Gosh that is such a stereotype, maybe I should stop watching so much movies.” Minji laughed at herself.

“No, I get it. A lot of them are, my dad is one of them, he’s big and kinda scary. Anyways, wanna go for a ride?”

“It would be stupid to decline such offer!” Minji grinned as she hopped on the vehicle.

The two of you rode into the darkness of the night, worries fade away and replaced with laughters and unforgettable memories.

That was the night that changed everything.

[Present Time]

You forever felt grateful to Minji who listened to your ranting that night, if she weren’t there you would’ve given up your long life dreams.

“I was so upset that night but somehow you managed to cheer me up.”

“I don’t know if you remembered the things you’ve said but I will forever remember. Take my word when I say that you’ll be far more successful than them, they can stay mad, jealous, and miserable. But you are a star, you shine wherever you go, even in the darkest room, you’ll be able to shine.” You smiled as you recited her exact words before looking back at Minji who was still silent.

“I’ve never told you this but…if it weren’t for you that night, I would’ve left my dreams behind and never look back. You’re the most important person in my li-“ You were startled by the sudden hug you received, but soon melted into her embrace, caressing for back once you heard a sob.

“I-I am really sorry” she cried into your neck. “I know you are, but you shouldn’t be sorry.” You replied softly.

“No I should be sorry, sorry for not talking to you, for being distant, really sorry for being a bad girlfriend.”

“Hey! Don’t say that, you’re the best girlfriend and I’ll never find someone else like you.” You cupped her face with your hands and leaned in, softly placing a kiss on her forehead.

“You better not.” She frowned as she point a finger in front of your face threateningly, but you found it cute. “And I do remember that night, and everything about that night. How could I forget when it’s the reason why you’re mine.”

You gave her a teasing grin. “I’m yours?” She nodded and intertwined her hands with yours. “Mine.” Before leaning into your lips for a sweet kiss.

[thenextdawn-temporarilyclosed]

One Of Your Kind (CH. 1)

Ch. 1 | Ch. 2 | Ch. 3 | Ch. 4 | Ch. 5 | Ch. 6 | Ch. 7 | Ch. 8 | Ch. 9 | Ch. 10

Word count: 2.7K

Summary: Your dream has always been to be a movie director, and your studies have been doing great.. until you get called to work in America and you’re forced to speak a language you don’t know.

Warnings: none

Pairing: Jenna Ortega X Fem!Reader

I’m finally starting to write my series! I hope you’ll like it🖤✨

———

A/N: Reader is italian, but every thought and dialogue will be written in English to make reading easier and smoother for everyone.

September 2019

Finally getting some freedom after highschool, you started your road to making your dreams come true. Living in Italy with a family that never supported you, is hard, really hard: you never had their economical support, so you had to work really hard and study even harder to get the scholarship you have always dreamed of. You wanted to be a movie director, you wanted to work in the movie industry and realize movies, tv series. The scholarship luckily covered the entire lasting of your studies, but before actually getting to work and start your career, you had to do your “training”, that is going on movie sets and watch how everything actually worked. You were a really good student and you were a really quick learner, the best in your class.

You started off easy in your country, traveling from Milano to Catania to go on sets. You didn’t really work there yet, you wanted to learn how things worked you had to observe. The actual movie directors made you hold the equipment all while you observed and learned how to handle situations, how to act around actors and how to interact with them. They also taught you a lot and gave very useful tips.

Your family completely disowned you, they wanted nothing to do with you, they didn’t want to have to pay for your studies so you were on your own. Luckily you had always found opportunities where you didn’t have to pay, or everything was paid already for you. However you even had a small part time job to help you pay house rent. Your dreams were coming true, yes, but your social life is feeling the effects of it. Between work and training, you never had time to meet people, make friends, fall in love… so in all meanings you were alone. On a good note, you never made people suffer because of your constant traveling: you knew that if you had a girlfriend, you’d make her suffer because you were never in your hometown, you were always traveling and whatnot, when on sets you had to keep your phone on silent, and it was HOURS before you could even pick it up again.

With COVID happening, your studies and training was interrupted. Even your work. You were in deep shit, to say the list. You didn’t have a job, and you couldn’t pay rent. Luckily the owner of the apartment you lived in was comprehensive enough to understand the situation and give you time, until you found a new job. You sent job applications here and there to work as a student and as a “equipment holder” on sets, you didn’t even see WHERE the filming would take place, you just needed to work, do something that could help you pay rent. 9 months passed before you actually got a call back, well- it was more of an e-mail.

THE Megan Park, one of your favorite actresses, was having her debut as a movie director on her new and first movie, The Fallout, and she was willing to have you as her student.

“Hello (Y/N)! Your e-mail where you say you have been looking for movie sets to help holding equipment has been forwarded to me by a few people. I also saw that you’re wanting to be a movie director and that you will doing whatever you’re asked to do just to be on a movie set and learn. I’m more than willing to pay for your flight from Italy to Ohio and have you as my student. I look forward to your response!”

You didn’t really understand English really well, so you copy-pasted the email onto a translator and read it. Great, you had a job! But it was in… Ohio? AMERICA? You were freaking out. It was a great opportunity, sure, you have always been wanting to go to America, but as a tourist, not as a student… you reflected at least a couple hours on it. America has always been your dream, but you were scared. Will people understand your crappy English? Will you find any friends, will you actually learn what you want to learn?

You chose to take the opportunity and reply to her letter, though explaining your problem with the language. You used a translator and sent her this response:

“Hello, first of all I would like to thank you so much for looking at my application. I really love your works and I’m more than happy to accept your invite, though I have something to say, and I hope it won’t be a problem. As you know already I’m Italian, but I don’t really know English. I mean I know the basics, but it takes me some time to form a sensed sentence and to understand what I’m being told. I know this can be seen as a malus point, but I hope it won’t be a problem.”

You got her reply after just half an hour:

“No it’s not a problem at all! I’m really glad you decided to take the opportunity even with your difficulties. I’ve seen your résumé and I get that you’re a fast learner! I believe that you can learn English as fast as you learn how to be a movie director. Within the week I will send you the details of your flight, I look forward to meeting you!”

Just like that, the next week you were making your way to the airport, with a luggage that was heavy as hell for just a month and a half, but you really had no idea what to take. Was it hot, was it cold? You had clothes for both occasion. It was summer there as it was August, but you thought that maybe at night it was colder. However you got to the airport, until you were in Italy, you had no problem. Megan had booked you a flight in first class so you had as much comfort as you could for a 15 hour long flight. However your problems started on that plane… the staff was entirely speaking English.

On the fourth hour of flying a flying attendant came to you. “Good morning miss. We hope you’re having a good flight. Would you like something to eat?” What was that she asked? And why did she speak so fast? You didn’t understand anything at all. “I don’t… speak english very well” you said, with a really noticeable Italian accent. The flight attendant excused herself and sent you someone who actually spoke some Italian, and she was your savior for that flight, but the fact of being all alone in a country of English speakers, scared you like hell.

After those long, tiring 15 hours of flight you finally arrived in Ohio and followed instructions to the exit. You didn’t know what to look for, but in the mail with the details Megan told you that she would send someone to pick you up, and that the driver would be holding a sign with your name on. It took you a while, but you found the guy and he loaded your luggage in the car before driving you to the set. The landscapes of Ohio were incredible to say the least. The movie would be filmed in a school so you didn’t have to go in the countryside, but the short road trip from the airport to the set was really relaxing and beautiful.

When you arrived on set, you were immediately lost. People gave you weird looks because they had never seen you, but you took a look at the mail Megan sent you where she told you where to go, and followed the indications that led to her office, though you never made it there, because she saw you going that way and intercepted you. “(Y/N)!” You heard someone call you and turned around, only to see Megan coming your way. She hugged you and you reciprocated the hug awkwardly. You knew Americans were confident with other people, but you didn’t expect them to actually hug people they’ve only talked through e-mails with. “It’s good to see you!” She said. Luckily, greetings you could understand. “It’s… good to see you too” you spoke really slowly, trying to make sense out of your sentence. Megan smiled “so you do speak English” she said with a smile. You had to reflect on her words before actually speaking. “A little” you said, mimicking it with your fingers so that Megan actually understood you.

The first days on set were really hard to say the least. The actors hadn’t arrived yet, and this is part of the reasons why Megan made you come before they started filming. She wanted you to familiarize with the rest of the stuff, to see where the equipment was and she even told you what you were going to do and how you were going to help her, and gave you a daily to-do list, rigorously translated in italian, to make you feel more comfortable. You talked with her through a translator for the first period of time so that it would be easier for you to understand everything and you had to say it was really helpful, she put you at ease and you couldn’t be happier.

But of course there had to be problems there, too. Because eventually you had to talk to other people, other staff members. Even though you told them you didn’t speak really good english, they insisted on speaking english and not wanting to use a translator. They used technical languages, names of the equipments, and you understood none of it. You had tried looking for the names on the internet, and you did find them but when in a sentence, and when they spoke fast, you didn’t understand what they were asking you to do.

Even when the actors and actresses arrived and got comfortable with the set and the staff, the higher ups always got mad at you for doing stuff wrong, but you didn’t understand what they asked you to do, it wasn’t your fault. People would make fun of you, calling you stupid because you didn’t understand them. You had hoped to make friends with the actresses since Megan told you they were your age, but the rest of the staff told them that it was useless, because you didn’t understand english. It’s not that hard to communicate, people just have to be patient. When filming started, a lot of times they would have to start shooting scenes all over again because you had done something wrong. It had gotten to the point where Megan would receive constant complaints about you. She had to do something.

To make things easier for you, Megan sent you texts translated in italian.

Megan: Vieni nel mio ufficio, dobbiamo parlare. [come to my office, we need to talk.]

You didn’t answer her text, but you went to her office, scared as hell for your work, for your place, for your future as a movie director. As soon as you walked in, she gave you a small smile. “Hello” you said as you sat down in front of her. “I will try to talk slow for you. Is this okay?” She asked. Luckily, you could understand when people were talking to you slowly- only Megan did this. Everyone else refused to. “I’ve been getting a lot of complaints about your work. They say you make things wrong, that you don’t listen and you don’t want to listen. Is that true?” She asked you. You gulped and thought of your words before speaking. “I don’t understand what they ask me. I try to tell them to speak slow but uh-“ you thought of your words. “They don’t want to speak slow. So I don’t know what they ask me and I make things wrong. I am sorry.” Your english was very, very bad and your pronunciation made it ten times work, but you made it work.

Before Megan could reply, you spoke again. “If you want one other student, I can leave. I do understand.” Megan shook her head and smiled. “You can stay, I understand that it’s not your fault. Those are idiots. From now on you’ll only talk to me, you’ll only follow my orders, you’ll work under my direct command so I can make you the movie director you want to be. Okay?” She said as she made her way towards you, putting a comforting hand on your shoulder. She also wrote that down and translated it to make sure you understood, she probably was the only one to make you feel at ease there. “So, are you making any friends? With the actors, I mean” she said, still talking slowly as the two of you walked out of the office. She wanted you to improve your English.

“No, I didn’t” you said and sighed, looking in front of you. “How come?” She asked. You looked at her in confusion, what did “how come mean?” She looked at you and laughed at your confused face, before apologizing. “I’m sorry. Why? Why did you not make any friends?” You smiled slightly. “Oooh so “how come” is also used to ask “why”?” You asked, and she nodded. “Your staff talked bad about me to the actresses. So they don’t talk to me” you shrugged and went on with your walk with her. From that day on Megan made it her mission to get the actresses to come talk to you.

You only did what Megan asked you, and slowly but surely, your work was amazing. She asked you for tips, she asked you what she could do better. At first you were scared to do so, but after a while when you had more confidence with her, your tips revealed themselves useful and she actually improved her work thanks to you. She let you check the screens, use effects, filters. She let you be an actual director, teaching you lots of stuff and you couldn’t be more grateful. But just recently, she has been trying to get you to work closer to the actresses… especially to the one playing Vada. Her name was Jenna, you learned. And according to Megan, you two could really get along.

The two of you hadn’t really talked yet because Jenna was of course too busy talking with her co-star, Maddie. But today, she had wanted to try some equipment on and understand how it worked, and Megan had given you the job to help her put it on. She stood still as you did your job and didn’t speak a word, knowing what she knew about you, she’d probably make fun of you, so you stayed quiet… but she was the one wanting to make conversation. “Hi” she said as you walked around her while setting up the equipment. “Hi” you replied back pretty quickly. This was the only thing you could understand pretty quickly. At some point Jenna had figured out you were around her age, and seeing people make fun of you because you barely knew English, wasn’t good. “You’re (Y/N), right?” She asked and looked at you and you nodded, avoiding her eyes.

“I’m sorry about what they say about you. Don’t listen to them, they’re idiots.” She said, speaking too fast for your likings. “I’m sorry, I don’t speak English very well.” You said, and she smiled slightly, before saying the same things, but slower. She was the first person after Megan who was willing to talk to you even if it meant taking hours just for a sentence. “They are idiots..” you spoke lowly, not wanting them to hear “you’re Jenna, right?” You asked just for confirmation. She nodded and shook your hand.

“It’s nice to finally talk to you, (Y/N)”

A/N: I’m sorry that there’s not many JennaXReader interactions in this first chapters, but I promise that there will be more in the next one. I really hope you’re gonna like this fic

[reasonsforhope]

"While mainstream media increasingly cover violence and legislative attacks against trans people, many scholars and activists worry that focusing just on violence and discrimination fails to capture the full experience of being trans.

Drawing on the success of movements like the Black Joy Project, which uses art to promote Black healing and community-building, trans activists are challenging one-dimensional depictions of their community by highlighting the unique joys of being transgender.

My research on trans parents affirms the reality of trans joy. From 2019 to 2021, I interviewed 54 transgender women — both current and prospective parents — from diverse racial and class backgrounds across the country.

I found that while many have navigated discrimination in their parenting journeys, they also have fulfilling parent-child relationships, often with the support of partners, families of origin and their communities.

Gender euphoria

Scholars and community members use the term gender euphoria to describe a “joyful feeling of rightness in one’s gender/sex.”

It diverges from the diagnosis of gender dysphoria, or a sense of conflict between assigned sex and gender identity typically associated with feelings of distress and discomfort.

Gender euphoria celebrates feeling comfortable with who you are and how you are perceived by the world.

Some people transition with a specific set of goals, while others discover new sources of joy and new facets of their identity over time.

Many of the trans women I interviewed expressed their gender euphoria in relation to their role as mothers. A Black trans woman in her 20s, whom I will call Gloria, experiences joy in being recognized as a mother.

“I love being called Mom. That’s the greatest thing,” she told me. “I love waking up every morning to see [my child’s] beautiful face. It keeps me motivated.” ...

For many trans people, transitioning opens up a new set of possibilities. When I asked Adriana, a trans Latina in her 30s, what it was like to come out as trans, she told me,

“I’ve never been happier. The happiest day of my life was when my daughter was born, and the second happiest day of my life was when I [started transitioning].”

Family and community connections

While some trans people do experience rejection from their families of origin, that is not true for the majority of the community.

In a 2015 national survey of over 27,700 trans adults, the U.S. Trans Survey, 60% of respondents reported having families who are supportive of their trans identity.

Trans women also form chosen families with friends, co-workers and other community members. Relationships with other trans people can have particularly positive effects on identity development and overall well-being, including emotional resilience, self-acceptance and a sense of connection.

Trans community care

In addition to caring for their biological and adopted children, the trans women I interviewed felt a responsibility to take care of their community.

Sometimes this care manifested as parent-child relationships, in which respondents provide financial or emotional support to LGBTQ+ youth.

Maggie, a white woman in her 50s, didn’t know she was a parental figure for her “queer kids” until they tagged her on Instagram to celebrate Mother’s Day.

“Someone might go, ‘Hey, can I stay on your sofa tonight? I’m having a hard time.’ Well, yeah, of course,” she said.

“Or they might hang around the shop [I work at], and only later it dawns on me, ‘Oh, this was the only place they could come and get affirmed and not feel weird.’” ...

Miriam, a white trans woman in her 60s, agreed that she has a lot to learn from younger trans people.

“A lot of my community today, people who I count as family and my beloveds, are not of my generation,” she said. ‘Beloveds’ is the term she uses to describe her platonic loved ones.

“I learn a lot from my beloveds in their 20s and 30s, who don’t have the same baggage I [dealt with] about how I could be and who I could be.”"

-via GoodGoodGood via The Conversation, July 14, 2023

[svt-rosalie]

Hi so Rosalie dating woozi may I know how it happened ? How ask how? What was seungkwan reaction? Is woozi the jealous type? What if someone else flirt with Rosie? Hope you still taking requests. I love your work by the way 👍

[this ask was sent in december of 2023….. im so sorry i haven’t responded]

The developed feelings in the early months of 2019, they didn’t speak on them though.

They were concerned like “Why am I catching feelings for my friend? S/he’s suppose to be JUST my friend”

I mean Rosalie always thought Jihoon was cute but that was silly child crushes, but this was adult crushing and they did not know how to act around each other

You can see in there behind the scenes videos that they kind stray away from each other but still stay in eye sight — yet they don’t speak to each other.

Same thing with Going Seventeen episodes, they only interacted when they HAD to because they would get flustered and not know how to act around each other.

The announcement of feelings didn’t come to light until Rosie’s birthday.

They shared a kiss that night

It was late and Jihoon was the last to wish the girl Happy Birthday, honestly Rosie was sick of them tip toeing around each other and confronted him head on

“Why are you avoiding me? Did I do something to you?”

“No you didn’t do anything Rosebud”

“Then why are you avoiding me?”

“Well you’re avoiding me too!”

“But you started it! I didn’t want to push your boundaries!”

“Well maybe I want my boundaries pushed!”

AND BAM ROSALIE LAYED ONE ON HIM!!ahhhh my babies.

Honestly that settled their feelings for each other but Jihoon did run out of her room and run to his like a little scaredy cat.

That did hurt Rosie’s feelings a lot, especially when he went back to avoiding her and not wanting to speak up about their feelings for each other.

Rosie confided about everything that was going on to Seungkwan.

The older boy listened and gave clean advice. Just because of his feelings didn’t align with her own doesn’t mean he was going to sabotage what she was feeling for someone else.

Seungkwan told her to wait it out, let Jihoon come to her. They both know how he is when it comes down to talking about his feelings. They both know he would rather ignore it than confront it. He told her to just act normal with him, if he wants to ignore it that doesn’t mean she had to.

And that’s what she did and it kinda felt like they were back to normal? Woozi slowly came out of shell once again and acted the same way he did with her before but the lingering touches and side glances at her were noticeable, but only to them.

During New Years of 2019 though is when everything came to a head and was finally confronted.

Jihoon FINALLY asked the girl to be his stating that he wants to go in the new year as the luckiest man

:(( i love them so much

Rosalie was over the moon and forgot that there was camera all around and just smacked a kiss on him.

It didn’t really matter to either of them though because whatever were to happen they would go through it together, as one.

I also wouldn’t say Woozi the jealous type to be honest?

I feel like they both are secure in their relationship and know that they have to act a certain way with fans for fan service.

That doesn’t mean Woozi doesn’t side eye the male fans that express that Rosalie is exactly their type at fansign

Jihoon does definitely joke with the girl and say “Oh how’s your other boyfriends doing?”

Rosie will be so confused and pout at him like “Huh? I have another boyfriend?”

Jihoon wouldn’t be able to finish the joke without laughing and covering Rosie’s face with kisses and saying “Nevermind Nevermind, just give me love.”

They are actually my favorite couple AHHHHHH!!!!

i will have actually written chapter scenarios about their relationship and how it developed shortly, can’t promise how quickly it’ll be done though!

[callmewrinkles3]

Sandwiches

Summary: Dan’s delayed coming home from winter testing. Emmy’s in bed. Fluff.

March 2019

The flight from Barcelona to London wasn’t long, but Dan was exhausted. Two weeks of winter testing meant his brain was mush in a good way. The car felt good. Not great, but he was comfortable. He could work with comfortable. But then there was a delay so they were diverted to Gatwick and it was a pain getting through. But finally after far too long he was getting his bag and getting into the taxi with Blake.

Emmy hadn’t replied to his landed text so hopefully she was actually asleep for once. She never really slept when he was driving, even in testing when it was safe. But then they were in the taxi and he put his phone away so he didn’t smile stupidly at it and give everything away. Having his manager and one of his best mates living next door to his girl was awkward for so many reasons. Especially this one.

“Talk to you tomorrow, Mate? Well, today?” Blake asked and Dan shook his head.

“Day off? Weekend off, fuck it. When’s the next thing I actually have to do? Sim work, right?”

“Sim on Monday yeah.”

“Fuck it. We’re off this weekend. I’m gonna spend it sleeping and stretching.”

“See ya.”

The driver pulled back onto the road until Dan got him to stop beside the 24 hour shop. “Just here, thanks.”

“I thought you were out further?”

“My girl’s in his building and we’re keeping it quiet for now. We’re all friends.”

“Good luck.”

It was a ten minute wait to make sure Blake was actually in his place before Dan started the minute walk down the street. He spent the time productively and picked up a bouquet of flowers for Em. They’d very carefully ignored Valentines Day, unwilling to have that conversation and let his heart be broken if she didn’t feel the same way he did. So instead it was purple and yellow tulips that he had in his hand while he climbed the three sets of stairs to get to the tiny attic apartments.

Opening the front door by pushing in the one spot guaranteed not to squeak, the first thing he noticed was the chill in the air. A quick glance at the crap storage heaters showed they were supposed to be on, but there was no heat emitting from them. Fucking landlord too cheap to fix it even when Dan had called multiple times after Em had. She’d repeated the story about how the handyman taught her how to use the heaters instead of checking them one too many times, her “I was using them in uni halls and I was warmer then, Danny!” filling the air.

Sitting in the middle of the table was a beeswax wrap covered plate and a bottle of water. Pulling the wrap off he discovered the BLT sitting there on crusty bread. His girl always left him something if she was going to bed, crisp bacon and tomatoes that were well insulated to stop the bread going soggy making him so happy. This was home. The way no matter what was going on Em made sure to have a sandwich waiting for him to get back to her if he was due in at night. For the first time in too long there was someone who cared about him just because she liked him and that was magical.

He finished eating and took a swallow from the bottle before capping it and wrapping his arms around himself to keep the heat. It was quick to brush his teeth and run a cloth over his face to get the worst of the travel grime off. But finally he pushed open the bedroom door to see the best thing. His Emmy was curled up on the side of the bed he usually slept on, a black and yellow hoodie on to keep her warm in the March chill. Her arms were wrapped around the Jigglypuff plushie he’d bought for her in Japan the year before and she was so peaceful it nearly hurt him to have to get her to move. He pulled his clothes off quickly and pushed the starry night duvet out of the way so he could slip into the bed.

“I’m back, Emmy. It’s just me,” he murmured as her eyes opened and a grin spread across her sleepy face.

“Missed you.”

“Missed you too.” He kissed the top of her head as she curled up against his chest and tried to get comfy again. A moment later he felt her shuffle and watched as her hands moved her hoodie up.

“What’s up?”

“Wanna feel your skin. Know it’s you. I-“ She was cut off by a yawn. “The hoodie made me think you were Jigglypuff but I’m too sleepy.”

“I’ve got you. Hands up for a minute.” It took less than a minute for him to pull her hoodie off and throw it across the room, leaving her bare skin pushed against his as they curled under the blankets and got warm again.

“Nigh-night Danny. Tell me about testing tomorrow. We’ve got time.” Dan watched Em’s eyes close as she curled in tighter, their legs tangling together. They were flying to Australia in a couple of days to spend time in Perth before Melbourne and he couldn’t wait. It was two and a bit weeks that he got to spend almost entirely with Em curled up beside him with his family there. In the quiet of the night he could admit it to himself. He couldn’t wait to spend time at his home race with the woman he was in love with.

[artdcnaldson]

(I just re-read changeover, and idk if you were headed this way, but I wanted to add my 2 cents)

So, I just know in my sould that the IUD failed. Maybe you fell pregnant. Maybe Patrick decided to put on some adult pants and decided to stay with you and raise the baby.

And maybe, just maybe, you two know that Art could be the father as much as Patrick, but you two never say it out loud because once the baby is born it looks so much like you, maybe the baby has art's nose and hair, but she also has Patrick ears and mannerisms, so none of you ever comment about it.

Anyway, you don't cross paths with art and tashi again until 2019. By that time, your kid is seven-eight years old, and you're holding a fat little baby no older than nine months. You're the main breadwinner (because Patrick is obviously not), and you have a stable job that lets you take some advantages... like staying at the Ritz...

I don't know, maybe Art sees you first, as you're checking in, holding the fat little baby that looks like a carbon copy of Patrick. Maybe he thinks you're really... out of his league now. That he shouldn't even think of speaking to you, but then there's this seven-eight year old with his hair and his nose...

Idk just thinking about it. If you're not writing changeover anymore, dw I just wanted to vent a bit

YUMMMMMM <3 no I always loved this concept and it did in fact cross my mind!!! But then it makes me sad bc I was like :( poor pat

ok let me reveal my four little plot bunnies i was fixated on

Reader and Patrick happily married by 2019. She’s succeeding in her career of sports journalism and follows him to New Rochelle for the tournament. She and Patrick are both excited to see ArTashi again and Meddle and Lust.

Reader and Patrick are married, but have been separated for a little over two months after they both had verrryyy different feelings after a pregnancy scare. She goes to new Rochelle to write about them being at the same tournament, knowing it was going to end with a match between the two of them after 13 years. But being back around him and Art (esp now that arts a dad) and Tashi drums up a ton of intense feelings.

Reader and Patrick were married shortly after Atlanta, but it didn’t last. They got a divorce and now you’re in New Rochelle on assignment to cover Art Donaldson’s presence in a challenger.

BEFORE new Rochelle, you and Patrick are a power couple, super happy. You run into Tashi at an industry event, catch up, maybe wind up sleeping together. You expect Art or Patrick to be upset, but they’re kind of not?? Everything is just kind of full circle.

Anyways idk none of them WORKED but I have so many thoughts and opinions as well :(((