#she cannot handle more people taking MC’s attention away | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

xxsycamore · 1 year ago

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Also also! Something I really looked forward to doing! I had a great trip down the memory lane while doing this and I encourage you to try it as well - that way, after some time passes, you can return to those and be all like "OH, THIS ONE!":

One line from each fic of 2023 (excluding drabbles and most headcanons)

I decided to leave out the titles, but don't hesitate to ask if any caught your attention and you want to check out the whole thing! <3

be warned, some of those are nsft!

1 - Only you know of the humiliating defeat Napoleon suffered in the summer of 1807, not by the hand of a long-sworn enemy, but by the furry little feet of hundreds of rabbits originally released for hunting. But this is papa Napoleon’s bedtime story, and he must be the hero…

2 - MC giggles, turning in Dazai's arms so that they're both throwing a secret look at the couple. She's familiarized herself with the usual chirping of Bunta, so it's easy to note that the new clicking-like sounds he produces might be his way of courting the new female bird.

3 - Tears fill the corners of your eyes, and you know the Chevie pillow will get to shine again as a replacement for the real thing, catching your happy tears as you bury your face in it.

4 - Sucking on air, Ais does his best to keep his composure as he feels his clothed cock being suddenly grasped and tugged by Vere where people cannot see. "I said I'm bored."

5 - "It's like a big pizza pie." That's the single most absurd thing Galileo Galilei has ever heard in his life, being a person who devoted himself to astrology.

6 - His cane comes in contact with the glassy surface, and Gilbert gives it a good tap or two, as if testing its thickness. "This should be fine."

7 - "I've seen this place before and my first thought was about you. I knew that you'd say 'it's beautiful', so I took you here just so I can reply with that. You're more beautiful."

8 - "Hah. Napo. I like how it sounds." Leonardo chimes in, not even looking away from his morning paper. "Napo…" Jean tries. If it sticks with Jean, then it sticks forever.

9 - The mansion's oh-so-thoughtful butler, Sebastian, has a whole section of his diary dedicated to Napoleon's catboy-ness, frequently sharing the little things he learns about the former emperor with the man himself, ready to help him in his journey of exploring his new body. One of the pages begins with, "Today Monsieur Napoleon hissed at me as I tried to wake him up."

10 - The next passage from the book is even more explicit, putting your otherwise fantastically functioning imagination to shame - not because there's this foggy filter over it (that's a given), but because you're not imagining the right things. Instead of runaway lovers sharing a forbidden tryst, it's you and Chevalier. Instead of a moonlit field, there's a bedroom.

11 - Napoleon is dressing up for the day, not minding her presence in the slightest. He's still a little sleepy, not fully bending over to put on his shoe, but also not fully resorting to lifting his leg to shorten the distance... he makes a funny sight, but he looks at her and laughs in advance before she can mock him for it.

12 - You nearly send them flying to all corners of the room, but the quality of the shirt handles your impatience somehow, saving Jin the shame of having to exit your room afterwards with torn apart shirt… though if you know him, he'd wear it like a trophy.

13 - "Fate gave you strong rains, yet you held your head high and blossomed after each one. You're strong, Alice. And beautiful, too. You bring spring to Cradle."

14 - "Oh c'mon his eyes flashed red! I saw it!" Frown deepening, Fenrir watches his buddies ignore him as Ray casually robs him of cards he won unfairly.

15 - "Can I do something for your headache?" "For starters, take off that ugly hat…" Theo sighs, complying anyway. "Only if you promise it eases your headache."

16 - Ichiya claps his hands to dust them off, turning to face you - like an actor in the moment when the curtain falls, his frown metamorphoses into a picture perfect smile - a genuine one, because, such small distractions are nothing when it comes to spending quality time with you.

17 - His painting skills… they're so-so, but it's because of that that the line curving in a heart shape in the middle is so eye-catching, making his painting a whole masterpiece. "I still like yours better, though. You've got talent, Nunuche."

18 - "The worst thing is, I didn't see onion soup anywhere." "Now that's a problem. Come on, Nunuche, let's go somewhere else to eat."

19 - "You're all too cruel… what if he never returns home again?"… "What if he never returns home again?" she repeats. … "You hate him THAT much?!" MC sighs, shoving more popcorn in her mouth. She thinks of the good times spend with Dazai… well, they're not many, but…

20 - "Fuck me harder, you filthy rabbit!" Smack! The sound of your hand meeting Blanc's nice round ass resonates throughout the empty rooms of the house, followed by a pathetic noise produced somewhere deep in the man's throat.

21 - You figure you've been as still and tranquil as a garden statue, enough for the two little balls of fluff to dauntlessly approach the table. 'Too bad that not even crumbs are left when Yves' baked treats are brought to the table...', you don't say out loud, seeking their company for longer.

22 - Your soul is loud in parade, yet the skies are mourning silently. Why must they weep and rain down on the earth that Gilbert is walking? It's his return, yet the clouds disobediently refuse to part and make way even for someone as mighty and daunting as him. Very well then; you shall differ and be met with praise.

23 - Same as when I compare our fingers, how I compliment the good pair they make when intertwined. You're still the woman I fell head over heels for. So don't let those thoughts erase the beautiful smile from your face, Luv. It's the smile you're always wearing best."

24 - Theo looks stunning like that - control reeking from his form like his preferred choice of cologne, he occupies the armchair like a throne, legs crossed and chin propped up on an arm. Throwing a fit would make you a bad hondje, and you certainly wouldn't want that now…

25 - "I already told you. Those are Rosa Lelouchiae. An extraordinary flower for an extraordinary woman."

26 - "Happy Birthday, Yoritomo-sama. May you stay healthy and bring glory to the shogunate in the following year, too." Yoritomo frowns, visibly dissatisfied with Yoshino's overly formal extending of wishes. "Like a lover would, Yoshino."

27 - This maid has never held a broom in his whole life! Comte has a hard time with the roles swapped around, as he discovers the difficulties of taking care of the household as a servant and not as a master.

28 - Before you can decide what is he approaching you for, he sinks to his knees and… lays his head down on your belly. Gently. Right where Lumiere was a second ago. The warmth is back, but this time it spreads all the way to your cheeks. "It seems like a bigger cat came to make sure I won't be able to get up…"

29 - "We told the servants to leave the presents in our room… I was just informed about the delivery of a big one." A big one? What could it be? Curiosity peaking in the moment Luke pushes the bedchambers' doors open, Julie's eyes dart through the slit as it widens.

30 - As you lie in your throne of pillows (put together by Charles), in your new satin nightgown (a gift by Charles), you tap the ornate hand fan (a gift by Charles, again) on your thigh, pondering a dangerous thought.

31 - It appears to be a young woman, and behind her shows something large, bright red in color and reminiscent of a fishtail. …*Flip-flop* “Merde. I stayed in the sun for too long.”

32 - "Ahhh…haha… if you're able to use them as a tool of pleasure, then maybe I can recognize the worth of my own thighs! Though, I have to remark, any arouse that comes to me now would be directly tied to the sight that you are right now, bunny."

33 - Napoleon and MC turn in his direction, putting an abrupt end to what only looked like them about grab each other's collars (were they going to fight, or kiss?! ) only to shout at Sebastian, almost in one voice: "Sebas! Which one of us do you think kisses the other more?"

34 - "No! You're just- so considerable and gentle and-" The nerve furrowing Theo's brow is old and familiar, a friend you're glad to meet again, almost. "I'm normally considerable and gentle with the ones I love. Darling."

35 - "You miss the kisses? Strange... Are you sure? You've gotten plenty of kisses already, by the looks of it. You're thoroughly sunkissed."

36 -He gawks at your cuteness and stokes the curve of your shoulder, an innocent act, wasn’t it for the red toothmark making itself known just underneath his delicate touch. He's caressing you there in order to make you remember.

37 - "Everything alright, Naps?" Arthur tests the waters, taking a noisy sip from his coffee. "Yeah, you can always tell us if you have problems with your dating life. That's what friends are for." Theo chimes in, folding his arms in front of his chest.

38 - "Cuddles." Napoleon mutters determinedly like it's war strategy. He opens his arms, eyes still closed, waiting for MC to crawl her way there with eyes as equally tightly shut as his. "Cuddles." She delightfully agrees, backing up until the hard wall of Napoleon's well-toned front is enveloping her back.

39 - "I see that you have no lifeguard here at your beach." Luke still recovers from the surprise of seeing Emma burst into his bathroom, bathing suit on, hair put up in a slick ponytail, hands on her hips.

40 - "It's rather see-through. The gossamer makes your underwear visible. It aroused me." It catches her off-guard, bubbles of bliss liquifying into something hot, demanding, flammable. She feels it pooling right in the pit of her belly.

41 - "It's enough to cool off your pulse points in order to cool off your whole body. Stay still and let me work."

42 - Perhaps the bars and the fancy soirees have gotten old. Tonight was yet another late August night that saw the mansion’s parlor brimming with liveliness.

43 - "I caaaan't, Sebas! Stop torturing me by waving your yummy soup in my face, it's not that I don't want to eat, it's that I can't!"

44 - "I thought we could benefit from spending some quality time together after dinner." Shelby produces a low noise of surprise. 'For the sake of our mission', he crafts the correlation quickly on his own, as expected of him.

45 - Preferred poolside drink swirling in his glass as he moves it to his thirsty lips, the ice in his glass clinks and Shingen's sip is suspiciously small - you interpret it as him wanting to free his field of vision of anything that's not you quickly enough not to miss anything, no matter how small of a detail - and you giggle.

46 - Do all pureblood vampires live in remote houses up the hill? The change of scenery is a good distraction from the heavy weight of the luggage, but Napoleon still finds himself asking that question, making a comparison with Comte's mansion.

47 - "Are you sure you didn't lead me inside so we could end up stuck here alone?"

48 - "NO! I MUST GET THE EPILOGUE AND HAVE SEX WITH YOU TONIGHT!" "...?" The sultry conclusion, the epilogue of your day spent together, he figures. His writer's vocabulary might be rubbing off on you. That's kind of endearing, but…

49 - "Because you think you're looking cute in that, when all I see is a piece of clothing I want to rip off you."

50 - If only he was here right now, you're sure the pain would be way more bearable. Maybe he would sit in the armchair next to you and take out the small journal he keeps on his person to work on his current draft.

51 - Of course, you're accompanying Roy today - it's just you - and having known that in advance, while your Colonel's brilliant mind was at work crafting military plans, yours was coming up with plans of its own. Ones that are quite different in nature.

52 - "A just king ought to give his country as much as he takes. Belle is to oversee his equal sharing, for he must learn to treat his country the way he treats a lover. "

53 - "Do you remember your next line?" "No, I don't." "If you keep staring at me like that, you're gonna make me think the feeling is mutual."

54 - Dante remains still, his humming just barely audible yet still able to be picked over the low music. He motions with his glove-clad hand, spin around.

55 - He’s totally the one to hide being infected because come on, how are they gonna get out of there alive if the leader is down? Has a dramatic scene where he’s fighting off the transformation in secret.

56 - The letter she used as a bookmark lays open on the coffee table as she'd delayed her pastime just to look at the words inside once again.

57 - This tricks you into thinking that the folder is the object of importance in this exchange. When your eyes shift to those of the Colonel for further cues as to what is wanted of you, your attention is inevitably stolen.

58 - A heavy sigh leaves your lips, part relief, part disappointment. "Seriously… I thought we could rely on you for keeping everything in order, but you can't even keep your body in order…"

59 - Her bed, which is positioned in a way that is mirrored to his own, with only a thin wall separating the headboards.

60 - "I have not forgotten my duty. Tonight too, thank you for appointing me. However, I'm afraid I cannot take on this mission alone if I want to achieve great results."

61 - "Seeing as we won't be showing up to that party… I guess we don't need the pretend couple lessons anymore."

62 - He's never been the kind to move around much, and would prefer it if he never has to leave the mansion at all. Especially not via carriage. He claws at the carriage doors when someone tries to put him in one.

63 - "No, I mean like... actually yummy."

64 - "Eureka. So you're not as virgin-minded as you appeared to be just a second ago."

65 - Haphazardly flipping the pages until he finds the right one, he taps his finger on the notes he took. "This is a m-mistletoe. It's a parasitic plant propagated by birds… it's used as a Christmas decoration and… traditionally, when a couple happens to simultaneously stand under it…they must… they must…k-k-k-k-kiss."

66 - "That's what I was asking! Ahhh- Fuck, Alice. I want you everywhere, all the time, what are you doing to me?"

67 - As soon as their gazes meet, Napoleon holds up the mistletoe again, and dives down for another kiss.

Here it issss, 2023 in fic banners! Oh my god, when did all of those happen?! Last year's college looks so much smaller in comparison 😭😭😭 Thank you so much for your support, I don't know where I'd be without your encouragement to keep doing what i love! Hope to see you again in the new year~

#writing summary 2023

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thenovelartist · 3 years ago

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Could I request the ToT boys reactions to something seriously scaring MC? Something that leaves them visibly shaken, maybe teary?

Let's hope I did this justice because I tried editing this many times over and my mind just wanders away XD

Luke

He’s her childhood friend; he knows her inside and out.

Or, so he thought.

He’d never seen her like she is now: visibly shaking, staring off into space, and almost unresponsive to his voice.

The only thing he can think to do is take her cheeks in his hands and try to get her to look at him.

But when she balks, turning that wide-eyed gaze on him, his heart shatters.

“Hey, you’re okay.”

Eventually, the haze in her eyes clears as recognition flashes in them, and he watches her break.

Instantly, he pulls her close, and she clings to him like a lifeline as she sobs.

He holds her tightly, rubbing her back and whispering comforting words.

He doesn’t know what happened to her in the eight years they’d been apart, but he’s determined to find out.

As for now, he’ll hold her small, shaking frame as tightly as he can and be her protector from the world.

Once she settles, he’ll carry her away back to his place, where he’ll insist she stay the night. Because he’s not going to leave her alone when she’s like this.

He’ll hold her as long as she wants and needs.

Only once she’s okay again will he begin to gently pry into what happened to cause her to react like that.

And afterwards, he’ll take her cheeks in his hands, wiping away the tears as he promises to protect her from everything.

Vyn

He’s a psychiatrist, and he’s seen a lot of trauma in patients.

So when he sees MC balk, eyes wide with pure panic as she’s practically ready to flee, a little red flag goes up in his head.

And when she’s left shaking, breathing heavily with her eyes glazed over, he knows what that is.

He’s handled his fair share of people in trauma like this, but none of them were people he cared for as deeply about as he does MC.

So his first instinct is to take her gently by the shoulders, turning her attention away from the source of her trauma and get it on him.

He’s not surprised when she startles at his touch. He’s surprised by just how much the panic on her expression hurts him, but he knows this is typical and patience is needed here.

“You’re safe.”

He watches her break, realization clearing up the haze in her gaze, and when she starts bawling, he pulls her in.

He doesn’t say anything as she grabs at his shirt, hanging onto it like it’s the only thing keeping her standing.

He holds her close, both to comfort her and keep her steadily upright, as he rubs her back in a soothing motion.

He hates seeing her like this because that means something happened previously to scar her like this.

It makes him sick.

Once she calms, he slowly guides her to his car, his arm never leaving her back so as to support her.

He’ll take her home, get her tea, and put on some classical music to calm her down. And he won’t leave until she has recovered.

Later, he’ll pry into her past and offer treatment for her.

Artem

To Artem, his MC is unflappable.

So when he sees her become panicked, he’s completely caught off guard.

She’s holding her chest, her breathing heavy, and she looks on the verge of tears.

After a moment of standing like an idiot, unsure of just what to do, he approaches her side and touches her shoulder.

He instantly regrets it when she flinches, turning her fearful look on him.

He pulls back, uncertain of what to do in this situation as his heart breaks at the helpless feeling that engulfs him.

Before he can apologize, she leans into him, hugging him as her tears flow freely now.

Slowly, he embraces her back, allowing her to cry as long as she needs.

“I’m here.”

He’s never felt so helpless before, feeling her body wrack with sobs.

And there’s nothing he can do to fix it.

All he can do is be here for her now.

Eventually, when her crying subsides, he’ll take her home. His arm will be around her waist as he guides her to his car, both steadying her and keeping her close for comfort.

He’ll linger around for a long time, cooking her something warm to eat and just stay by her side.

He doesn’t want to pry, but he will ask. It has less to do with his burning curiosity and more to do with him thinking it’s a safety issue.

Because if something bad were to happen when no one was around to help her, she’d be in danger, and he cannot in good conscious let that happen on his watch.

No matter if she tells him now or promises to talk about it later, he’ll be by her side until she’s comfortable enough to be on her own again.

Because it doesn’t matter how long he has to stick around, even if it’s long into the night. He won’t leave until he is sure she’ll be okay.

Marius

He’s seen his Miss Attorney in court; she is fierce.

And she’s always ready to rip him a new one, much to his delight.

So when he watches her unravel, her breathing heavy and eyes far off and glazed over, he almost can’t recognize her.

She just looks… so fragile.

That realization snaps him into action, touching shoulders and calling her name.

Except she panics at his touch, backing away and turning her terrified gaze on him.

He freezes for a moment, regretting his quick actions, but eventually takes her by the shoulders again.

Slowly, the fear leaves her eyes as tears begin to form in them.

He sweeps her up, engulfing her in a tight embrace as she clings to him and sobs.

“I’ve got you.”

His heart is broken for her. He may be soothing and gentle on the outside, but inside, he’s pissed.

Something happened to hurt her if his fearless Rosa is acting like this.

Eventually, when she calms, he’ll sweep her up in his arms, carrying her to his car so he can drive her to his place.

Unless she says she wants to go back home, then he’ll go with her.

Either way, he’s not leaving her until she’s calm and he’s certain she’s going to be okay.

As long as she shows him glimpses of her getting back to being the girl he knows and loves, he’ll be able to settle down and be at ease.

One day, he’ll pry into her past. Because he wants to know what happened so he knows how to protect her the next time.

#tears of themis #tears of themis headcanons #luke pearce #vyn richter #artem wing #marius von hagen

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drabbles-mc · 4 years ago

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Could you do a HC on how the Mayans men would react to a girl getting hit on at a bar and the guy not taking no for an answer, like they don't know her or anything. I feel like they all respect women enough to at least do something about it; ya know?

All of the Mayans men wake up every day and drink a full pitcher of Respect Women Juice. They will not tolerate disrespect in their house. HC’s under the cut!

(I couldn’t decide if i wanted to do third person or reader insert for these but I settled on reader insert. Hopefully it works alright)

Bishop:

-Senses the tension immediately

-My man sits back and watches the entire clubhouse all night. He knows everything that’s going on. And when he notices that some guy is refusing to leave you alone, he instantly gets up and goes to intervene.

-He’s not hot-headed about it. He doesn’t have the time or the energy for that anymore. But he places himself between the two of you, looking back and forth, “Everything alright here?”

-The guy would try to brush it off and reassure him that yea, of course everything is okay you can leave now. But Bishop wouldn’t have any of that. He’d cut him off mid-sentence, “I wasn’t fucking asking you.”

-He’d turn to you and ask again if you’re alright. You’d give a slight shake of her head no, not wanting to stir up drama but also not wanting to deal with this dude anymore. And that’s all it would take.

-”I think you should leave,” he wouldn’t yell. Just state it as a fact. But when the guy would try to argue that’s when he would get a little more heated. He’d step in closer to the dude’s face, but not putting hands on him, “I said you should fucking leave.”

-Bishop only uses yelling and brute force as a last resort. Very rarely does it ever come to that. He would follow the guy all the way to the clubhouse door, making sure that he actually leaves before going back to check on the poor girl that he was harassing. He 100% lingers close for the rest of the night to make sure no one bothers you.

Angel:

-King of being the Fake Boyfriend.

-My tall boy might be emotionally illiterate sometimes but he can read a social situation. When he sees a girl scrambling to try and come up with excuses to make a guy leave her alone, he has no problem inserting himself into the situation.

-Smooth as fuck walking up to you, greeting you while resting a protective hand on your shoulder. Instantly setting the tone to whoever is talking to you that this was a useless endeavor.

- "Hey, querida,” he’d wait for you to look at him, “Sorry, didn’t see you walk in. You get a drink already? Want me to get you something?”

-The look in his eyes would let you know that he’s offering you an out to the uncomfortable situation that you’re in. He’s not trying to flirt--he’s just trying to drive away whatever asshole wasn’t catching the hint that you didn’t want to talk.

- "Who the fuck are you?” this is a problem that the guy did not see coming.

-Angel would look at him, eyes narrow, “I’m her boyfriend. Who the fuck are you?”

- The question is rhetorical. It doesn’t matter who the guy is. Angel doesn’t give him a chance to answer. He steps closer to the guy, towering over him. He looks down at him and is practically begging the guy to say something stupid so he has an excuse to physically throw him out the front door.

- He doesn’t get the chance, though. The guy reads the cue, knows that it’s a fight that he will not win, and walks away.

- Angel would turn back to you, “You good? Sorry about that. Didn’t seem like he was getting the hint.”

- You’d shake your head, “He wasn’t. Thank you, I appreciate the assist.”

- “No problem,” he’d pause, “But forreal did you get a drink already? First round on me.”

Ezekiel:

- Y’all remember the casino scenes with the cops? That’s how he handles shit.

- Master of keeping his cool in frustrating situations. Completely follows your lead. He sees a lot of weird interactions being on the serving side of the bar, always clocking what’s happening in front of him in case he has to step in.

-He’d notice you rolling your eyes and giving short answers. He’d also notice that the guy either isn’t picking up the cues, or is willfully ignoring them. EZ catches your eyes a few times, silently asking if you want him to step in. You shake your head--the guy is annoying but harmless for the time being.

- Then he tries to touch you. Casually reaching for your shoulder, trying to rest his hand on your knee. You recoil, trying to create more space between the two of you. He doesn't care though.

- That’s when EZ can’t keep it to himself anymore. He’d sigh, not looking up from the glasses that he’s cleaning, “I don’t think she’s into you, man.”

- You and the man would both turn to look at him, each of you with a surprised expression on your faces. You’d stay quiet, wanting to see how the situation was going to play out. The man next to you would scoff, “I don’t remember you being part of this fucking conversation.”

- “I might as well be if I have to sit here and watch it. You’re the only one out of the three of us not suffering from how uncomfortable this is.”

- His commentary would ruffle some feathers. The man next to you would get defensive, “No one asked for your fucking opin--”

- Knowing that EZ had your back would give you a little extra confidence, “You should listen to him,” you nod, “He’s right. We’re suffering.”

- He’d be caught off-guard by the two of you teaming up on him. Realizing it wouldn't be worth the fight, he’d huff and walk away. EZ would watch him and chuckle, calling after him, “Least you could do is pay your fucking tab!”

- You’d laugh, glad to be done with the uncomfortable situation, “His drink and whatever you want are all on me tonight. As a thank you.”

- He’d give you that little smirk, “Don’t mention it.”

Coco:

- Zero tolerance policy.

- Not coy or polite about it at all.

-Instantly uses himself as a barrier between you and whatever guy it is that’s not leaving you alone. He might not be the biggest guy in the MC, but he sure as hell carries himself like he is when the situation calls for it.

-Will not hesitate to get nose-to-nose with whoever is bothering you. If someone wants to invade your space, he’ll invade theirs. Fair is fair.

- “You really can’t take a fuckin’ hint, huh?” he’d shake his head.

- “What’s your problem?” the man’s voice would sound confident but the look in his eyes would show that he really didn't want a problem with whoever this guy was getting in his face.

- “You. Fuckin’ beat it,” he’d jerk his head towards the door, “Don’t come back, either.”

- Coco carries himself with the confidence of a man that will make someone pay dearly for coming back uninvited. Confrontational situations usually resolve themselves quickly. People tend to not want to mess with him if they can avoid it.

-When the guy inevitably leaves not just you, but the clubhouse altogether, Coco finally turns back to you, “You good, ma?”

- You nod, watching him light up a cigarette, “Uh, yea. I’m good. Thanks for that.”

- He nods, blowing out a puff of smoke, “We’ll make sure that fucker never comes back.”

Hank:

- The only thing that Hank Loza drinks is Respect Women Juice. When he runs across someone that doesn’t, it gets out of hand really quickly.

-Bull in a china shop.

- The same man who is usually calm and cool and collected, physically removes whoever it is that is causing a problem. The guys have tried to teach him deescalation skills but it never sticks. It’s the only thing that Hank gets heated about so they all let it go at this point.

- Hank isn’t a small dude. When he steps toe-to-toe with someone he almost always out-sizes them. They get about 5 seconds to hear what he says and leave on their own before he removes them on his own.

- “You should leave her alone,” the friendly suggestion is really anything but.

- The guys are almost always cocky, not thinking that anything is actually going to happen to them, “Or what, tough guy?”

- They ignored their first and only warning. What happens next is all on them. Hank grabs the guy by the collar of his shirt, lifting him from the ground. His voice is quiet, which is way more terrifying than yelling, “Let’s find out.”

- Hank lifts and carries the guy out, on the brink of dragging him like a caveman. The guy is yelling in protest, trying to swing, but Hank is unfazed.

- He throws the guy down the steps of the clubhouse, giving a final warning not to come back. No longer in an agumentative mood, the man takes off in a desperate attempt to avoid getting further tossed around.

- When he goes back into the clubhouse, the rest of the guys have moved on from the situaiton--to them it was business as usual for Hank. You, on the other hand, didn't see the situation unfolding that way at all. He walked back up to you, the anger gone from his face, a gentle smile there instead.

- “Are you alright?” he looks you over as if to make sure you didn't get hurt in the midst of it all.

- “Yea,” you nod, “I’m...I’m fine. Thanks. You...you didn’t have to do all that.”

- He’d chuckle, knowing that for him it was the only course of action, “Of course I did,” he’d gently rest his hand on the outside of your arm, “Let me know if anyone else gives you any trouble.”

Creeper:

- The smaller version of Hank, tbh. Constantly out here Respecting Women.

- Remember that scene where he catches a shotgun that’s tossed to him and immediately starts shooting on the highway?? That’s the energy he has when dealing with men who disrespect women.

- Cannot easily lift and remove men the same way Hank does, but he will throw hands without hesitation.

- The guys told him no more threatening with guns in the clubhouse. So fists will have to suffice.

- Does not offer a warning to the guy. If someone is being pushy or rude, they don’t deserve a heads-up. He will try to get your attention in some way first, to make sure that you want him to intervene. If he thinks that it’s going to get out of hand, or if you let him know with a pleading look that you could use the assist, he is instantly throwing himself into the middle of it.

- He’d catch your eye, motioning back and forth between you and the man in front of you to ask if you need an out. You’d give him a slight nod and that’s all it would take.

- Walking up, he grabs the guy by his shoulder and turns him around, “Hey, motherfucker,” he’d shove him towards the door of the clubhouse, “Leave.”

- Caught off-guard, the man would shove him back. Fully-bruised ego shining through, “Keep your hands off me.”

- That’s when you’d hear the first crack of a fist colliding with someone’s jaw. Your eyes would go wide, not ever having seen Creeper get like this. His focus would be completely on the man stumbling towards the ground in front of him, “I said get the fuck out.”

- It usually doesn’t take more than one punch to get his point across. HIs muscles aren’t just for show--getting clocked by him fucking hurts. They’re lucky that he’s not big on wearing rings.

- Once the threat is neutralized, he instantly shifts back into his quiet, gentler self to check in with you. He sees the surprise in your face at how things unfolded and he holds his hands up in surrender, “I’m done, promise.”

- It’d get you to laugh. You can see it in his expression that it’s almost like a switch he can flip on and off. “Um. Thank you. That...isn’t what I was expecting. But thank you.”

- “Are you alright?” he’d sit down next to you, mindful to give you some space.

- “Yea, I’m good. How’s your hand?”

- He’d chuckle, “All good. Nothing new.”

Okay this was a lot of fun. I love all these dorks. Hope you enjoyed! xo

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mint-yooxgi · 3 years ago

Note

Hi! I just had to say I absolutely LOVE your y!Yuta x chubby reader story. As a chubby person myself I'm thankfull that there are romance stories of us as the mc. There should be more though since then we (chubby people) would realize we dont have to be 'skinny' in order to be loved we are just as loveable as anybody else and we dont have to 'work' on ourselves before getting into a relationship (The same could also be said about disabilities- we dont see much of a romance novels/stories esp. fanfictions with a disabled mc. Or at least I haven't). Well, actually i think this 'you have to look certain way in order to be loved" is something everybody has been told and the media enforces it (explains pick me's peraphes?). That problem should def be fixed.

Also I love that you showed us her inner thoughts and that she had a couple of very supportive around her (i would never be brave enough to talk about my struggles with my friends, they are great friends actually i just don't like to talk about my feelings lol).

Another thing I loved was how your characthers always ask for consent (in other drabbles too). I feel it's sooooo important to have it in (esp. yandere) stories like that. Though consent should be asked all the time even if they already have been togheter for years. And the ending where Yuta say: "Now, it's time for mine." sounds more like a demand than asking for consent. Something like: "Can I now have mine?" should work better. Of course unless it's the point that they never consider yn's feelings or thoughts since they are at the end of the day yandere and they 'know' what's best for their lover.

Oh no, I'm sorry i babbled so much but overall I really liked your drabble and I cant wait for more! Best of luck!

Hello there! Thanks so much for reading and enjoying my fic!!

I agree, there should always be more stories that are inclusive to everyone!! The media definitely plays a strong role in society and culture by enforcing beauty standards and ableist notions. Again, I agree, it should change and be more inclusive for everyone.

And oof, take it from one who has done the exact same thing as you before by not sharing my feelings. Don't do that. In the end, you're telling yourself that your emotions, boundaries, thoughts, and feelings don't matter by pushing them aside like that. Especially if they're negative, all of those feelings are just going to keep building and by keeping them bottled up, they might just one day overflow and become so much more than one can handle. I would recommend getting in contact with a therapist or a counsellor at least so you can have a healthy outlet for those feelings if you feel as if you cannot talk to your friends about them!

Again, thank you! I agree, I think consent is very important not only in stories, but just in general! Though, I'm going to have to agree to disagree on you comment about the last line of my fic. I can 1000% understand how it could be interpreted that way. However, given everything else in that fic that Yuta does and says, he would never, not in a million years, ever do anything like that without the OC's consent. If the OC immediately goes 'no' or 'stop' or even so much as grimaces or hesitates, he would not go forward with what he was about to do.

The reason it ends with that line is due to a few reason.

Pacing of the fic - The line at the end is meant for impact, ending on a high note. The flow of the story is always important to me, and it felt right to end it as I did, as I had always planned.

Yuta's character - as mentioned previously, throughout the fic, the OC's comfort and personal preference are Yuta's number one priority. During the smut scene, he even explicitly states so, and as soon as the OC expressed hesitation or discomfort, he immediately asked if they wanted to stop. During this scene, Jiyeon calls and takes the OC's attention away from him, and Ayato was brought up again, so his jealousy is simmering beneath the surface. I wrote him with great undertones of possessiveness, so this comment also stems from this.

Like I say in my disclaimer right at the beginning, I wrote this fic explicitly for me. At the end of the day, I'm going to write what I want to see, and I enjoy that line, honestly. The way I interpret it is that now that Yuta finally has the OC, so to speak, he is overcome by his desire for them, and finally he gets to act on it. To me, knowing someone is desperate and wanting me like that is quite attractive, and given how I wrote Yuta's character (and all my other characters in general) I know that he would never force himself onto the OC like that. Maybe that wasn't clear enough in the fic, though.

I do really appreciate this feedback, though, and I'll try to keep it in mind for next time! I'm always very conscientious of consent in my fics, especially my yandere ones, so I hope to continue to write them like I have been.

Thanks again for reading my fic, I'm glad you enjoyed it!

#ask #admin's thoughts #my opinion

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cheri-translates · 4 years ago

Text

[CN] Shaw’s Exorcism Date (Eng Translation)

🍒 Warning: This post contains detailed spoilers for a date which has not been released in English servers! 🍒

Note: This date was translated by @redqueenschoice! It’s on my blog because she doesn’t want to put individual translations on hers...

Shaw’s Qixi Collection: Date ♡ / Call 1 / Call 2 / Event / Special Call

Check out Victor’s date (by @lucienism) and Kiro’s date (by @skyholders) too! A lot of effort has been put in by these three lovely humans T^T💕 Do send them lots of love!!

On the night of Qixi, I had a terrible encounter and happened to be saved by Shaw. In order to repay the favour afterwards, I promised to run errands for him for seven days. Very soon, the seven days are coming to an end…

The crescent moon reminiscent of a bow hangs in the sky, the canopy of the heavens are painted pitch black. The little starlight that filters through the dense canopy of the forest scatters, and a line of men make their way through the mountain’s forest in a hurry, the swords on their waists still red with fresh blood.

A drop of blood falls onto the surface of a leaf, before it is trodden underfoot all of a sudden.

MC: Ahh…

Bandit Leader: Tell me the truth!

My head was harshly hit, and I let out a weak, muffled cry through the cloth stuffed in my mouth.

The image of my family’s pitiful state right before the moments of their deaths surface in my mind again, and my throat tightens, both my heart and mind unable to move on from the tumultuous upheaval in my life.

It was only supposed to be a trip to the neighbouring village to visit some relatives. How had it come to this?

Bandit Leader: The ones we’ve gone after the last few days weren’t lacking in anything, huh? Hiding so many goods…

Bandit Underling: That’s right. Especially this young girl here, she’s still young and healthy.

Bandit Underling One: Boss, before we sell her off, how about we… ehehe.

Upon hearing his perverted words and laughter, I start thrashing about in a panic, but the ropes wound tightly around my wrists and ankles just won’t budge no matter how hard I pull. Tears stain the blindfold over my eyes and I stretch my hands towards my waist, getting ready to put up a fight with everything I have - I’d rather die than be disgraced in such a way.

At this moment, however, he is interrupted by another low voice.

Bandit Underling Two: That’s enough. You can make merry anytime you like, but in this instance, it’s better for us to hurry and get on our way. I heard these woods aren’t to be trusted at night, and there are rumours that monsters come out at night.

Bandit Underling One: Big Brother, aren’t you a little too believing of these old folk tales? Where on earth would there be demons, and even if there were, I’m not scared of them!

Note from Red: and here, ladies and gentlemen, is the beginning to every horror movie ever

A cocky laugh leaves his lips, but the second he does, the surroundings in all four directions abruptly fall silent.

All of a sudden, a long, piercing cry rips the still night in two.

The sound is delightful to the ears, yet it is striking enough to tear through the haze - upon hearing it once, it would be irreversibly carved into one’s heart.

I only feel my body sway for a moment, but in the blink of an eye, I find myself shoved down onto the ground. The second my shoulder collides with the wet, slippery dirt, I hear the bandits’ terrified shouts flying to and fro above my head.

Bandits: Mon… Monster!!!

The snarl of a predator beast, the metallic hiss of a blade being unsheathed, frantic and hurried footsteps… followed by bloodcurdling screams.

The chaos and what I experienced a few hours ago are far too similar, the same sounds echoing inside my head until they slowly fade away to nothing.

I cannot see anything in front of me, and can only smell the faint scent of blood mixed with that of the cool forest suffusing my nose.

At this moment, footsteps gradually approach me.

I hold my breath, and feel cold sweat slowly trickling down my back.

Who is it? Did one of the bandits survive?

Or is it… the monster?

The owner of those footsteps stop before me, and a strong hand pulls me up from the ground.

The person lifts up my bangs and a fingertip meets my forehead, the ice cold sensation making me shiver.

Mystery Man: Hah.

He seems to have no intention of loosening my bindings, a peculiar silence filling the space between me and the nameless man before me. With the blindfold over my eyes, my senses of hearing and touch are my only links with the external world.

His breathing is very light, but with each exhale that leaves his mouth, I sense undeniable danger in the air. I can feel his gaze, like that of a wild predator surveying its prey, as if he would sink his fangs into me in the next second.

MC: Mmn!

Terrified, I duck my head away from him, trying to avoid his touch. Instead, I hear a short laugh coming from the person in front of me.

Mystery Man: Fine. Since you don’t want me to save you, just wait here on your own, then.

With these words, the heated breaths across my cheeks vanish and the man seems to disappear into thin air, leaving no trace. My surroundings are completely silent once again.

He left?

I don’t dare to confirm it myself, waiting where he left me for a moment. Once the sound of birds and chirping of crickets returns to the area, I let out a breath of relief and begin to move once again.

Since I was under constant scrutiny of the bandits, I didn’t dare to do this earlier. Now that there’s no one in the vicinity, I can finally reach for the small knife I had secretly strapped to my waist.

This is the last thing my parents, who died earlier this year, left me to defend myself with.

I carefully feel around for the handle of the blade, wrapping my fingers around it. Because I can’t see and my movements are restricted, the tip of the blade ends up nicking my skin a few times. Gritting my teeth, I bear the pain and work on severing my bindings.

Note from Red: guys this is the mc we need but don’t deserve-

When I finally pull off the blindfold around my eyes, I see that the moon has already moved considerably towards the west.

Apart from the goods the bandits had been carrying with them earlier, I don’t see anyone else when I glance about.

MC: Did those people… really get eaten?

At the thought of the danger I experienced earlier, and might still be in, I couldn’t care less about the injuries littering my body, and force myself to my feet with the support of a tree branch, preparing to leave the forest as fast as I can.

The mountain paths are confusing and complicated, and I feel like I’ve been wandering around in circles for awhile when I finally hear the sound of running water coming from nearby.

MC: That’s great! If there’s water, that means I can clean my wounds!

I hobble towards the source of the sound slowly, but just as I’m pushing through the underbrush, a sound suddenly rings out through the air, causing me to freeze where I stand in fear.

Mystery Man: Don’t panic, everyone has a share.

It’s the voice of that man from earlier!

Before I can react, there’s the sound of flapping wings in the distance, taking my attention with it. Several strangely shaped skeletal birds flap over, and from their shrill, clamorous cries, it sounds as if they’re begging for food from someone.

I turn my head, only to see a young man casually lounging in a rowboat on the surface of a pool, next to a grove of trees. In his hand is a bunch of evening primroses. Under the light of the night sky, their petals give off a gentle glow.

The young man’s long legs are crossed, golden eyes half narrowed lazily as he looks at me. His expression is leisurely and indolent, and I see the petal of an evening primrose held casually between his teeth.

If I hadn’t encountered him in such an unusual circumstance, in the depths of a mountain forest, perhaps I would have thought he was the pampered young master of a rich merchant or businessman.

Mystery Man: Oh, that sentence wasn’t quite right. It should have been ‘every bird has a share’.

As if the skeletal birds can understand what he’s saying, they let out noisy chirps before obediently taking the petals from his hand one by one. The second the petals leave his palm, they dissolve into puffs of black smoke being swallowed up instantly by the skeletal birds.

Mystery Man: Today’s haul wasn’t too bad, there’s so much evil energy about, there’s enough for all of you to gorge yourselves on for a long time…

Mystery Man: Oi, you little idiot at the back, I caught you! Be a bit more honest, you’re not allowed to cut the queue…

Skeletal Bird: Squawk squawk?

Mystery Man: What did you say? Why didn’t I swallow up that little lady from earlier?

Mystery Man: Come on, do I really seem like a scoundrel who doesn’t take proper care of women… yeah, I am.

Trivia from Red: The word ‘scoundrel’ was translated from is the negative of a Chinese idiom 怜香惜玉, meaning a gentleman who takes care of the fairer sex. Shaw referred to himself as someone unlike a gentleman, so that’s how I translated it.

Skeletal Bird: Squawk!

Mystery Man: [clicks his tongue] I was just playing around a little. After I feed the lot of you, I’ll go back and save her, is that cool with you?

At hearing his words, I secretly make a face in his direction, muttering under my breath.

MC: I didn’t need you to save me… I got out on my own...

A skeletal bird suddenly caws in my direction. The young man’s eyes narrow instantly, the light in his eyes intensifying to something swift and fierce, before he turns his gaze right in my direction.

Mystery Man: Whoever’s there, come out.

I’ve been found out!

Note from Red: She, in fact, had been found out.

I subconsciously take a step back, but all of a sudden, the injury on my leg flares up with immense pain. My body loses balance all at once, and I find myself pitching backwards before I know what’s happening.

MC: Ah!

Note from Red: MC then proceeds to black out in typical otome heroine fashion… but let’s cut her some slack she was cool here T^T

I drift in the darkness, countless strange dreams blending together and surfacing before my eyes. One moment it’s the leering grin of the bandits, the next it’s the cawing of the skeletal birds I saw earlier. But the final thing is the long, piercing cry I heard in the forest.

When my eyes blink open, I find myself in an unfamiliar room.

It’s a perfectly normal looking bedroom, and the sheets under me are fresh and clean. Somewhere, I can hear the sounds of a vendor selling his goods and the voices of kids peddling flowers drifting in from outside the window.

Everything is so peaceful, it’s as if everything I experienced before has just been nothing but a dream.

MC: Where exactly am I…

Mystery Man: You finally decided to wake up.

A young man dressed in purple appears at the door in the blink of an eye. Startled, I sit up as fast as possible in shock.

MC: Who are you!?

At my question, he leans against the doorframe casually, and after seeing my expression, the corner of his lips turn up in a smirk.

Mystery Man: What are you being so on edge for? I’m the benefactor who saved your life, you know.

MC: What benefactor, I clearly saw you on that lake earlier…

Mystery Man: You’ve had some entertaining dreams.

Note from Red: o k a y shaw

MC: Huh?

Mystery Man: You, little lady, fainted in the wilderness in the nearby mountains. If I hadn’t just happened to be passing by and decided to do a good deed, there’s no guarantee you wouldn’t have been eaten up by a demon.

What he’s saying doesn’t match up with what I remember, but the way he speaks so smoothly with absolute confidence makes it hard for me to doubt his words, and for a moment I question my own memories.

Could the glowing primroses I saw by the lake… and the skeletal birds… all been some sort of strange dream?

Mystery Man: It seems like you’ve slept yourself silly.

The young man runs a hand through his hair before straightening up once more, and I watch as he steps towards me until he’s right next to the bed, bending down to look at me more clearly.

His golden eyes flash with sly amusement.

Mystery Man: Since you’re awake, remember this clearly: you’re on my territory.

Mystery Man: The name’s Shaw, and I’m your benefactor.

Mystery Man: As for what you should do now, you should carefully think… about just how you’re going to repay me for saving your life.

Carrying a bucket filled with water, I stagger into the garden, out of breath.

The only other person in the garden is currently lounging next to a flower bed, legs casually swinging back and forth, the picture of idleness.

MC: May. I. Please. Ask. If. Sir. Benefactor. Has. Any. Other. Instructions.

Since the day I woke, in return for Shaw safely bringing me out of the mountain, I agreed to run errands for him for seven days. Today is already the seventh day.

Upon seeing me puffing and panting, his brow lifts in an amused arch.

Shaw: Hmm, go water those flowers over there while you’re at it, then.

MC: Shaw, don’t take your bullying too far!

Shaw: How am I bullying you? Weren’t you the one who said that you wanted to repay me by running errands? Or perhaps you want to do it by offering your body instead?

Trivia from Red: ‘Offering your body’ is translated from the Chinese idiom 以身相许, which means 1) pledge to marry or 2) have sex with a man of her own will.

I stare at him in horrified shock for a moment, face burning red from embarrassment. Grabbing the gourd dipper, I scoop up a full ladle of water and fling it at him with all my might.

Shaw ducks out of the way at lightning speed, and the spray of water splashes onto the flowerbed he had been lounging next to earlier, catching the light of the afternoon sun and forming a rainbow. Shaw’s laughter rings out clearly.

Shaw: I asked you to water the flowers, not water people. Or is your eyesight so bad you can’t tell a human clearly from a flowerbed?

MC: ...You!

These last few days, whenever we’ve had banters like this, I’ve never won even once. Determined not to fall into the same trap again, I ignore his words and instead ask a question.

MC: The seven days are almost up. Can I leave tomorrow?

Shaw’s smile turns teasing.

Shaw: Your house is opposite this mountain, isn’t it? Are you sure you won’t faint halfway on your journey back again?

MC: I definitely won’t!

Upon seeing my determined face, Shaw grins, opening his mouth to say something again. All of a sudden, however, the smile fades from his face.

MC: What’s the matter?

Shaw: Nothing’s up, I’m just heading out for a moment.

Shaw: If you want to go home, I’m not stopping you.

Shaw: But you’re not allowed to leave tomorrow. Stay put in my house, don’t take a step out of the compound.

MC: Why not?

Shaw doesn’t reply my question, and with a few strides of his long legs, he’s vanished from the garden.

MC: Shaw, wait a moment, you haven’t explained yourself-

MC: He’s gone?

This isn’t the first time he’s simply disappeared like this. With a shake of the head, I shrug off his warning. Besides, after tomorrow, I’ll have repaid my debt to him in full, and we’ll have nothing more to do with each other.

On the morning of the next day, Shaw still hasn’t returned.

I chew on my lip, looking at the doors for the seventh time, slightly hesitant to leave without bidding him goodbye.

MC: Well, it’s not like that rascal is going to bother about it anyway…

Trivia from Red: MC quite constantly refers to Shaw as 那家伙, which is a casual way of referring to a mischievous, rascally guy, and can be interpreted as ‘that guy’, or ‘that little punk’.

Even though I say those words, I find my footsteps slowing on the way out of the front courtyard.

MC: Perhaps I should leave him a letter.

I write him a letter and leave it on his table. Just when I’m about to leave, a painting hanging on the wall catches my eye.

MC: This is…

Taking a step closer to look at it more clearly, I realise that it’s a mythical beast that I’ve never seen before.

On the beast’s lower back are five tails, and on its forehead is a single horn. Just from the painting, I can sense a strong aura of pride and arrogance.

MC: This painting… it kind of resembles that guy.

Curiously, I reach out and touch a corner of the painting. All of a sudden, however, the sound of thunder rumbles outside the window.

I look out of the window, and am surprised to see that the sky, that was sunny just moments ago, is now blanketed with thick grey clouds, looking like it’s about to start pouring anytime soon.

MC: If I don’t leave now, it’ll be bad if I’m caught in the rain.

I fasten my cloak, pick up an umbrella and leave Shaw’s house.

Even thought it’s well into the afternoon, the little town is completely covered in a thick fog, as if it has been completely blanketed by a layer of grey. The little river that runs through the town has little lotus lamps dotting the surface, all of them floating along silently.

Just as I’m about to leave the little town, my mind gradually begins to calm.

MC: This feels a little strange…

The town that Shaw resides in might not have too many people, but on a normal day, it would usually be bustling with activity, the smell of firework smoke in the air.

Yet today, there isn’t a single person on the streets.

Note from Red: gee, i wonder why, mc-

The further I go from Shaw’s house, the faster the sky seems to darken and unease wells up in my heart.

MC: Maybe I should go back and wait for him…

[thunder rumbles]

The clouds seem to descend, and the sky darkens even further. I don’t know whether it’s just my imagination, but the mist seems to suffuse and thicken in the tunnel before me, and I can see the outline of dark shapes moving about inside.

Before I can look more closely at them, there’s a sound behind me, and I turn around. The moment I do, I can’t help but feel shock race through me.

It’s the skeletal bird I saw that night on the mountain!

The bird hops onto the side of the bridge, cocking its head at me. When it opens its beak to speak, what comes out isn’t the shrill squawk of a bird, but the familiar cool and clear voice of a man.

Bird!Shaw: Finally found you… what are you doing here?

MC: Shaw!?

MC: How are you… this bird is-

In typical Shaw fashion, the bird does not answer my question. Instead, it turns its head to look at the tunnel, and lets out a clicking sound even though it doesn’t have a tongue to do so.

Bird!Shaw: Come with me.

With that, it flies to me, taking my sleeve between its beak and tugging me in the opposite direction. Being pulled along into a run with it, all my words come out garbled.

MC: Wait a moment… What, what exactly is going on? Just now, what was that? And you, what are you?

Bird!Shaw: You have so many questions.

MC: It’s not me who has too many questions! It’s just that you’ve hidden too much from me!

Bird!Shaw: ……

Bird!Shaw: It’s the Ghost Festival today.

MC: Ghost Festival… Hungry Ghost Festival!?

Trivia from Red: The Ghost Festival, also known as the Hungry Ghost Festival, is a traditional Buddhist and Taoist festival held in certain East Asian countries. According to the Chinese calendar (a lunisolar calendar), the Ghost Festival is on the 15th night of the seventh month.

In Chinese culture, the fifteenth day of the seventh month in the lunar calendar is called Ghost Day and the seventh month in general is regarded as the Ghost Month (鬼月), in which ghosts and spirits, including those of deceased ancestors, come out from the lower realm. The deceased are believed to visit the living as the realms of Heaven and Hell and the realm of the living are open and both Taoists and Buddhists would perform rituals to transmute and absolve the sufferings of the deceased.

Bird!Shaw: That's right. This is when the nine yin converges, and evil grows easily. It is the day when the Ghost Gate opens, and evil and living souls intersect. It will be more troublesome than a typical day.

Bird!Shaw: I distinctly remember telling you to stay put in my house, who would have thought you’d actually dare to leave and make trouble for me.

As the bird says this, it turns back to eye me. Even though it has no eyes, I can clearly see the words ‘annoyance’ written in its eye sockets.

At that moment, a feeling of unhappiness washes over me, and I can’t help but open my mouth to speak.

MC: All these things… you could have just told me earlier. You made me wait for you for the entirety of yesterday… without so much as an explanation.

MC: Shaw, am I really not worthy of your trust? Am I a burden to you?

The bird stops fluttering its wings for a second before it turns its head, not saying another word.

For a moment, I wonder if Shaw is angry with what I said, but after a while, a small snort of laughter leaves the bird’s mouth, ringing in my ears.

The sound is so clean and clear, it seems like Shaw is standing right next to me.

Bird!Shaw: I don’t think of you as a burden.

Bird!Shaw: I can tell you my true identity, it’s just that at that moment, you can’t be afraid and you’re not allowed to regret it.

MC: I won’t be scared, and I wouldn’t regret it.

Bird!Shaw: Then follow me closely.

The clouds close in on us, and the first drops of rain begin to fall.

It’s going to rain.

I follow after the bird closely, and each time, I narrowly manage to escape every encounter with a dark shape. Just as we’re about to leave the small town, however, it’s as if all the spirits suddenly sense me, and they all turn and start rushing towards me!

Bird!Shaw: Don’t bother about them! Just run towards the exit of the town!

The second it finishes those words, it lets out a caw. As if rallied, a hundred of the skeletal birds suddenly fly over from behind the wall. Like arrows loosed from a bow, they descend on the mass of black spirits and attack them with their sharp beaks and wings, keeping them tightly packed together.

But there is a limit to the number of birds, and the pitch black spirits can’t be stopped.

Understanding that the birds can’t buy me all the time in the world, I grit my teeth and run as hard as I can for the exit of the town.

Even before I can take two steps, pain runs up my leg, as if I’m being yanked back by something. I fall painfully to the ground.

Withstanding the pain, I look down to see a skeletal person grabbing tight onto my ankle, refusing to let go!

No matter how hard I struggle, the person refuses to let go, and only holds on tighter and tighter. Watching the rest of the dark shapes slowly approaching, I yank out something I have tucked in my waist, and bring it down as hard as I can on the person.

Shiing!

A loud wail rings through the air, but the grip loosens enough for me to pry it off. Looking down in my hand, I clasp the dagger that had saved me seven days ago, I’ve never let it leave me even once.

But in the time it took for me to do all that, it’s too late for me to escape the town.

I grip the dagger tight.

The dark shapes draw closer, before they finally rush at me ferociously.

[thunder rumbles intensely]

Thunder rumbles throughout the sky, like the beating of a thousand drums, the galloping of a hundred thousand horses, unceasing. In that second, hundreds of white hot lightning bolts flash through the air before me, bathing the entire sky in bright white light.

Note from Red: that can’t be good for your eyes...

A large hand covers my eyes from behind.

Note from Red: who needs sunglasses when we have shaw’s big hands T^T

Shaw: You idiot, why are you just standing there for? Do you want to keep your eyes or not?

His tone is teasing and lighthearted, but it makes me feel safer than any promise or vow in the world.

MC: Shaw…

Shaw: I didn’t think you’d be able to save yourself, not bad.

Shaw: No wonder I-

The rest of his words are cut off by the rumble of thunder, the flash of lightning. I feel raindrops land pitter patter on my nose and cheeks.

In order to let me hear his words clearly, he leans down and puts his lips right next to my ear when he speaks, breath hot against the shell of my ear.

Shaw: Turn around, open up your umbrella and count to ten in your head before you open your eyes. Got it?

I nod with all my strength.

Shaw releases me and I obey his instructions, opening the umbrella and beginning to count.

MC: One, two, three…

The strikingly familiar cry I heard that night in the forest rings out from behind me, leaving yet another deep impression in my heart.

MC: Four, five, six…

The rain slows to a gentle drizzle, and the oppressive air hanging over the town seems to be slowly fading.

MC: Seven, eight, nine…

Shaw… Shaw…

MC: Ten.

I turn around.

Within the bright flashes of light, I catch sight of a silhouette of the five tailed mythical beast.

Evil spirits dealt with and the dark clouds gone, it seems like the town has finally gone back to normal.

Because I injured my foot, Shaw takes me to a small boat, and the two of us drift along slowly on the river. As the boat is slowly carried along beneath a bridge, Shaw, who is lazily sitting at the front, plucks a flower from the side to play with.

The lotus lamps bobbing alongside us glow softly, and what was initially supposed to be a gloomy Hungry Ghost Festival resembles more of a pleasant evening of a wedding night.

Shaw’s purple robes flutter in the wind, and under the light of the lamps hanging from the boat, the horn on his forehead seems to be softened with a soft glow.

The scenery before me reminds me of the time we first met on the lake back in that forest, the only differences being that he’s now missing a few birds, and that I am here with him.

MC: Right, why haven’t I seen any of the other town residents today?

Shaw: You think everyone is like you? I already warned them beforehand not to leave their houses, it’d make way for the souls and I can do what I need to do.

MC: Hahahaha…

Shaw: What are you laughing about?

MC: I’m laughing at you - with that image and disposition, who would have guessed that you’re actually a great immortal?

After hearing my words, Shaw lifts an eyebrow, looking slightly miffed.

Shaw: Then what did you think I was, a monster?

MC: I think that you’re Shaw, that’s all.

Shaw stares blankly at me for a moment.

MC: Shaw, on the day of Qixi, when you brought me out of the mountain, was it you who rescued me from those bandits as well?

Even though my words are phrased as a question, my tone is sure and certain. There’s a flash of surprise in Shaw’s eyes, but he doesn’t reply. He casts his eyes downwards, manner insipid.

Shaw: That isn’t a good memory to have for the Qixi Festival. Just forget it.

MC: I won’t forget it.

What he says is true. The Qixi festival is deserving of good and happy memories, and being by bandits certainly isn’t that, but still…

I look earnestly at Shaw.

MC: But on that day, you also appeared.

All around us, the lotus lamps flicker softly in the night, jade green smoke curling up faintly, the cool sounds of running water in my ears.

MC: I feel like this is the most memorable, and also the most treasured Qixi I have ever experienced.

This world’s thousands of relationships cannot be clearly defined by these dates, but on this Ghost Festival, my heart soars more than it did on the day of the Qixi Festival.

Shaw watches me silently, before he puts down the flower in his hand and leans forward, closer to me.

His hands carry with them the body temperature of one that is not human, fingertips lifting up my bangs once again.

Inch by inch, his finger trails down, as if mapping out my face.

His golden eyes are locked firmly on me, gaze intense and captivating like that of a wild beast, not letting my eyes deviate from him in the least.

This time, I don’t shy away from him.

Shaw: The last time, didn’t you ask for my true self?

Shaw: I’m Zheng, and I consume evil energy as sustenance.

Shaw: I’ve never felt like I’ve done this to help humans, and I’ve never considered myself to be an auspicious sign like the legends say.

Shaw: When I’m hungry, I eat.

Suddenly, my hand is grasped tightly in his, and he lifts it to his mouth.

He bites down slowly on my index finger, sharpened teeth scraping over delicate skin, and slight pain radiates out from where his lips are wrapped around my fingertip.

Shaw: Even if that’s what I am, you’re not going to be afraid of me?

Even though he’s clearly giving off a sense of hidden danger and his words are meant to provoke me into giving him a response, my heart skips a beat at the smile on his face.

MC: I…

Shaw: I… what? Speak louder.

With a self satisfied smirk that looks reminiscent of a cat that got the canary, he nips on my finger again.

MC: I said, I won’t be-

Before the word ‘scared’ can leave my mouth, my finger suddenly slips free of Shaw’s mouth to land on his lower lip. My fingertip softly runs against his lips, breath warm and eyes shining.

It’s clearly… a kiss.

Note from Red: yes mc you get flustered NOW when your finger was on his lips but not when he was literally biting on it priorities on point we stan

In a moment, my entire face burns bright red and I hurriedly pull back my finger.

MC: Shaw!

Shaw grins at me as he releases my hand, his gaze on me filled with an emotion I can’t quite recognise. Having fallen for his tricks yet again, my heart races and I desperately look for something to say, but didn’t expect that Shaw would beat me to it.

Shaw: Shouldn’t you be heading home?

The second he says that, I’m reminded of my original purpose: to bid my farewells to him before leaving for home.

I nod at him for a moment, before I shake my head energetically.

MC: Shaw, I…

Shaw: But today, haven’t I saved you once again?

MC: ...Eh?

Shaw: The timing’s just right. I’ve polished off all the evil energies and spirits here completely, it’s time for a change in scenery.

Shaw: The town near your home… is there anything entertaining?

He speaks so quickly that I have no time to think.

MC: Entertaining… well, not really, but there’s a lot of good food there! Recently it’s been chestnut and lotus seed season, so there should be a lot of confections sold on the streets…

MC: Wait a second, you’re not thinking of following me home, are you?

Shaw: Of course I am. How else are you going to repay this huge favour you owe me for saving you?

His words are bold and upright, but the grin on his face is that of a satisfied hunter.

Shaw: Before you fully repay the favour… don’t even think about escaping from me.

#mlqc #mlqc cn #mlqc spoilers #mlqc shaw #redqueenschoice translated this

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urlocalbunny · 4 years ago

Note

Hey, sweetie! I hope u'r doing good! I have a request for boys: About reader crying because he/she didn't pass the access for a job or university and it was his/her dream.

Recently I was rejected for the place in university and I didn't have anyone to cry with xD. Thank u! Have a nice day <3

Awww. Anonie, I've been in the same place as you and I really wished there was anyone there to comfort me, so just know that this isn't over yet and you can pick it up from where you left off if your situation allows you. You're not less smart and this year has been terrible for all of us, so try again and start quick so that you can work very thoroughly. I'm rooting for you and I hope I can make a request of an MC who got accepted in the future for you! You and all my readers mean a lot to me :3.

Aaron:

Honestly, he looks like the type to say "fuck school" and insist on making you feel better. Seeing your frustration makes him cry too.

He'll hold you close and whisper words of comfort and remind you that you did your best and no one can take that away from you, and that's still not your last chance.

He will listen to you and ask you if you're doing alright in case you decide to study again. He will also try to take some small tasks out of your way so you can get back in shape and decide what to do.

He will support you. No matter what in the world happens, he's your other half and he won't let you fall off.

Raphael:

He will be sad and angry at the same time. How can education be so hard and cold on students like this? That's despicable!

He will give you advice and try to help you as much as he can while you're sad. He will dry your tears but if you pay attention, his blindfold is creating small wet spots.

When he sees you being more lively and active, he will try to help you study in case you want to try again. Whether it is literature or grammar, while you cover the new rules, he will help you with the main stuff so that you can make a better exam.

He won't push you back into uni if you don't want to. You can study at home with him and try again later if you wish to.

Beliath:

If he could he would demolish the corporate building, but he's going to stay calm because he still needs to learn how to operate a wrecking ball.

You had good references and you made a great interview, but they decided to hire other person with less performance because they came from a wealthy people's university that you couldn't afford even if you also had a good degree and better grades.

He will dry your tears and get you something to drink while you both talk. He listens mostly and gives some of his usual motivational talk if you bring yourself down.

You'll realize how much you actually believe in that crap and take your time to think about what you want. If you're too nervous, he will give some tips on how he talks people into things and while you're slightly concerned, you learn a lot.

If you're willing to take a break from interviews to figure yourself out, he will make it the best break possible. You won't go a week without proper skin and hair care.

Vladimir:

"What do you mean they did not accept you?

He will be baffled by how a small company such as this made such a mistake. You're an incredible professional and if it was before in his time, he would definitely want you on his team.

You had a good way with words and you were capable, what in the world were they looking for then? He didn't realize he was saying it all out loud with the most exasperated tone possible until you broke down laughing.

"They said i don't have enough experience." "Well, let me tell them something about experience, they can shove that up their..." "Vladimir!!" "This is it. I will send Beliath everywhere to help you spread your profile around. He was happy to see you trying to get a job again, he will help you out. We will go over your skills again because you cannot be seriously defeated with some simple and stupid company. My mother is dead and she is a better boss than that."

(you get another job quick fast, believe me.)

Ethan:

He thinks it's very stupid of the university to have such evaluation system that makes students feel so pressured. He will be even more surprised to see you simply broke down. You're so much more than that.

He will get into your skull that you MUST see yourself in other places and trust that you're smart even if you didn't pass. That's not what defines you.

He will scold you because you're not seeing your own worth and he will urge you into trying again with his help this time. He doesn't want you to do it alone, but you have to look for education and he knows how much this means to you.

If he sees you're breaking down though, he will ask you to stop. He doesn't want you to lose everything you've built because you're in a bad place mentally.

Ivan:

He probably got rejected in job interviews once too. He tells you to not give up on your job and try again because your only mistake was being late and that made you nervous.

He will go over anything you need with you and he will give you some comfort, respecting your limits and cuddling you when your thoughts get hard to handle on your own.

He will help you spread your resume copies sneakily everywhere. He won't stay quiet in one place if you tell him you decided to try for a job again, EVER. He won't stop helping until you've found a place for yourself. And he's proud of you no matter the outcomes.

#moonlight lovers #sfwbunny #ml aaron #ml raphael #ml beliath #ml vladimir #ml ethan #ml ivan #moonlight lovers headcanons #bunny's writing #moonlight lovers fanfiction

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drakewalkerfantasy · 4 years ago

Text

The Past in the Future ( Ethan x MC, Eleventh x Clara): Part 1

Summary: After unknown substance was deployed in senator Ed's hospital room by his aide, three people got trapped inside, while a man claiming to be the Doctor coming out of nowhere. Will it be possible for the Doctor identify the unknown substance that presumably is deadly and elevated through time? Will he be able to find a cure along with the brilliant diagnosticians team that never was found before to prevent millions of deaths? Are his suspicions correct about origins of the substance? And how this seemingly unimportant person got this mass murder weapon in a first place?

Words: 4632

Authors notes: Open Heart and Dr. Who crossover

A/N 2: tags will be in reblog.

Ethan x OH MC (Beth Valentine)

Eleventh Doctor x Clara Oswald

**Warnings: death, deadly substance**

“He is not even a real doctor,” huffed Ethan rolling his eyes when the man on a screen called himself the Doctor for a dozenth time.

“Shush,” said Beth putting her finger over his lips. Her body pressed closer to his making herself even more comfortable in his embrace.

It was a movie night at her friends’ apartment. The first one after she moved out and moved in with Ethan, but one of many since they started dating. He still couldn’t pinpoint the exact moment when he finally gave in to his feelings.

Some funky looking character made a comment about life being too short at the gala they hosted to save the hospital, and here he was sitting comfortably in the armchair surrounded by Beth’s friends. His friends. He thought, still somehow amused that he had a group of people he could call friends and who were willing to spend time in his company. His eyes drifted to Beth placing a soft kiss to her forehead making her lips quirk slightly from the gesture.

The movie that Elijah chose this time was the Dr. Who’s Christmas special that was very fitting to the season and the weather outside. Fluffy snowflakes falling to the ground and wind howling in the chimney. Christmas lights illuminating the street.

They sat together ignoring the glances they got from others around them. Her legs thrown over his lap and one of his hands placed gently on her thigh, while another was wrapped around her shoulder bringing her closer to him. Her head pressed to his heart. His eyes not leaving her small frame pressed to his body, watching her drift into sleep listening to his heartbeat. Here and now he was happy, unburdened yet by the knowledge of what tomorrow will bring them.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

The next day started as usual. Diagnostics team got a new case, patients were queueing for the free clinic, and surgeries happened a few floors below where Beth was heading.

Little did they know what was about to happen. Unsuspecting what horrible event will unfold right in front of their eyes and how they will become entangled in a race against time to save the lives. Hoping that time will be gracious and give them enough to save the lives that could be saved. The lives that could be lost as soon as Beth Valentine would step into senator Ed's room. Unsuspecting yet, that a day from now her name could be the one of four others lost during senator Ed's assassination attempt.

Beth was already near to senator Ed’s room when she noticed some woman running inside after hearing raised voices. Sharing a troubled gaze with Danny and Bobby she rushed toward the room right behind them. They looked in shock at Travis who was standing with the black canister in his hand yelling at everyone to stand back from him and senator, while the girl still tried to reason with him. Muttering to him over and over that there should be another way and that violence is never an option.

Beth could see how Travis’s face contorted in anger, when his gaze landed on the woman whose eyes were looking unblinkingly on the canister in his hand. His fingers curling dangerously around its trigger and he pulled on it, spraying the content of the can into the air. The same instance the girl reached out for Danny's hand as if anticipating what will happen next. Her hand gripped his, pulling him away shielding him with her body, while Bobby jumped in front of her, throwing both of them out of the harm’s way just a millisecond before getting a blast of spray in his face. He felt how the room started to spin around him and he dropped to his knees, gasping and choking from the substance that got into his airways. And while everyone got covered in the thin layer of oily sheen the senator managed to run out of the room just a second before canister deployed, leaving five other people behind.

And that was it. The moment when the course of history got changed. The moment when two complete strangers stood in front of the window looking at the scene unfolding in front of them. The moment when their lives could get changed forever. The moment when they needed to trust in the kindness of strangers and believe that together they will be able to save the universe or at least two women and a guy who could be still saved. The moment when Ethan was just a second too late to grab Beth’s arm and pull her out of the room or walk in himself, altering the future even more. Just a second too late to prevent this from happening.

Ethan stood still looking at the woman behind the glass, feeling how his heart pounded in his chest. Feeling the fear and pain growing inside him. Blaming himself for asking Beth to check on senator just before he would have time to do this himself. Blaming himself for being just a second too late.

He could see reflection of another man appearing by his side, something flashing in his hand with a green light before disappearing quickly into his pocket. His eyes widening and his hand reaching for the glass to knock on it to get attention of the petite brunet girl who he didn't know and who was squeezing Danny's hand. A look of pure shock in her eyes.

“Clara,” exclaimed man beside him frantically tapping on the glass before waving his hands at the girl. Her eyes darted from Bobby's laying body on the floor to the man. Who was looking in shocked bewilderment and disbelief on the scene before scratching the back of his head and straightening his bowtie. He looked at the scene with expression that matched Ethan's but seemed to be holding a knowledge. The knowledge of hundreds of years in his eyes, carefully hidden behind the young face and the bang of hairs that fell over his eyes. The knowledge that was forgotten with time and space. The knowledge of future. The ridiculous thought suddenly popped in Ethan's mind seemingly from nowhere. The thought that he discarded immediately even before he could register it fully.

“What the hell just happened,” mouthed Ethan, looking at Bobby's unmoving body before meeting Beth's gaze watching how she shook her head solemnly after checking his pulse. His eyes looking inside the room through the window noticing how quickly paled the face of unknown girl and she swayed clutching the bedpost in the last moment before falling. Noticing how Danny reflexively covered his mouth when the nausea rolled over him. And Beth's muffled cough sounded from the room. His eyes moved to look at her, ready to go inside without even thinking about consequences.

"I wouldn't do that," the man's voice warningly sounded beside him, when his hand reached for the door handle ready to open the door. Instantly, feeling a firm grip on his hand not letting him in before he even could hear Beth's weak voice asking him to stop.

“Who are you?” Ethan asked momentarily confused why he cannot enter, before furrowing his eyes at the man, wondering what this stranger is doing here.

“I’m the Doctor,” the man replied turning his head to Ethan with a glint of excitement and disbelief mixed with fear toward some yet to be solved mystery.

“Doctor who?” Ethan asked. His eyes not leaving the man's in front of him as if trying to decipher who this man is.

"Just the Doctor,” shrugged ridiculously looking stranger, taking out an Identification Document and flashing it to Ethan.

Centre for Disease Control. Secret subdivision U.N.I.T. John Smith aka The Doctor. Rode Ethan, his eyes flicking to the man's face before moving back to ID in front of him. U.N.I.T... Who the hell are they? Did they sent him here? But why? What was so dangerous in that thing that they felt like interfering? And more importantly how did they know this will happen? wondered Ethan examining the slightly psychic paper. He warred internally for a moment longer still unsure if he should trust this man who looked somehow fascinated by the seemingly deadly substance. The man who appeared from nowhere and seemed to be knowing far more than he led on.

“Do you know, what was in that canister,” Ethan asked finally looking flatly into man’s eyes.

“No...,” the Doctor replied with a hint of hesitation in his voice and a quirky smile, as if he knew more than he was ready willing to admit. “But I'm your best hope to figure out what it is.”

Ethan looked sceptically at the man wanting to say something but instead asking him: “Who the woman is? You called her name earlier? Is she with you?”

“Yes, she is with me.”

“Who is she?” asked Ethan insistingly.

“She is a friend,” simply replied the Doctor, throwing his gaze to Clara. Just a friend. He thought, suddenly feeling how his excitement slowly started given way to worry in the face of something that he didn’t anticipate to see here on Earth. Something that was from both the distant past and distant future. Something that was alway evolving and changing as a living organism. Something that didn’t have a cure in both of these timelines. The mystery that needed yet to be solved. The one that usually would fascinate him, but not when his Clara... his impossible girl was in danger. Knowing that from now on he will need to race the time, watching how the life of the woman he cared about deeply would be slipping through his fingers. Knowing that from now on the time will become fixed instead of flux. Knowing that from now on he will need to come up with something very clever to solve the mystery that was never solved.

His expression changed to thoughtful trying to understand how this substance could ended up on Earth, hoping he was wrong about its origin. Watching Ethan making a phone call to C.D.C. unsure of how U.N.I.T. could help, at the same time shouting orders in between to evacuate patients from the rooms around the epicentre. His knowledgeable eyes looked around watching how everyone hurried to execute the order. When the floor finally became empty, except of the few people left behind, Ethan came back standing in front of the window, watching through the glass at the woman he cared about. His face pale and his pupils dilated in horror no matter how hard he tried to hide it. Standing near to the man who seemed so calm from the outside not even suspecting that his hearts were pounding violently inside his chest and his brains were spinning with the million thoughts and scenarious happening at the same time.

“We need to move. Now,” quietly said the man in ridiculous outfit, pulling Ethan out of his thoughts.

“How did you know this will happen,” Ethan barked, turning his ocean blue eyes to meet hazel green depth of the man’s who studied him carefully as of trying to decipher how much he could tell him.

“We didn’t...”

“Stop it...,” Ethan interrupted him abruptly. “If you wouldn’t know, you wouldn’t be here, and the girl...,” he nodded toward the ward his eyes flitting to meet Clara’s. “Wouldn’t be trapped in there.”

His eyes lingered on the petite woman for a moment longer, studying her paled features. His watchful eyes not missing how her knuckles went bone white, holding onto the bedpost, when she tried to stand straight. Not missing, how her breathing became struggled while she gulped for air. Not missing how her eyes flickered to the man at his side who withhold something and he couldn’t get the grip of it. He couldn’t read him as easily and it bothered him, eating at him from inside. He sighed heavily before meeting the Doctor’s gaze still waiting for his reply.

“We did't know,” repeated Doctor.

“Than what were you doing here?” didn't give up Ethan.

“I was sent here, but I had not idea what I will be dealing with. Dr. Ramsey, the only thing I can tell is that we don’t have a lot of time. We have twelve hours at most. If this thing is what I think it is. It will progress quickly and I have seen it already many... many years ago. You either believe me or wasting the time that we don’t have thereby exposing them to the inevitable death. Please Dr. Ramsey, just this once, for the hell of it accept the help that is offered.” the Doctor snapped. His hands placed firmly on Ethan’s shoulder, looking deep into the man’s eyes, searching them.

“Okay...,” Ethan finally said after another bit of hesitation, closing his eyes for a split second before making his final decision. Knowing that he would do anything for Beth even believe the madman who appeared out of the blue looking too excited and too knowledgable about the situation. “But just to be clear,” he added, turning away from the window separating him from Beth. His cold steely gaze fixed on Doctor. “I don’t care who you are and who you work for or whatever the hell U.N.I.T is. This is my hospital. My rules. And these are my team members that are trapped inside. Are we clear?”

“Sure Doctor. But we need to move, now. Remember it is spreading quickly,” the Doctor said touching the glass lightly before twirling around ready to follow Ethan and leave the ward behind. At least for now.

Quickly they both went through the hospital’s halls toward the diagnostician's office. Twenty eight brains already trying to process the information they had. Preparing the plan. Three hearts racing in their chests, troubled for the future. The nerves pushing them to move quicker. And one thought occupying them both. We need to solve it.

“We have a case,” Ethan said to the two people already in the room. “Unknown substance was deployed inside senator Ed’s ward. Senator Ed luckily for him escaped even before this happened. But Robert Gunderson, Danny Cardinal, Beth Valentine, Travis Perry and Clara...”

“Clara Oswald,” the Doctor continued after Ethan stopped. “They are all trapped with the unknown deadly substance. It affects everyone with different speed. Based on my observations and what we know already it mostly depends on how much exposure the person got to the substance. But may also depend upon other factors of which we have no knowledge of.”

“Who are you?” June asked suspiciously, folding her arms over her chest. “You know suspiciously a lot about what happened.”

“I'm the Doctor,” he replied getting his psychic paper out of his pocket and flashing it to the two other doctors.

"What are you even doing here?" she asked watching him carefully, trying to read him but failing. “Seems to be quite a coincidence for you to be here, don't you think?”

"June...," warningly said Ethan, raising his eyebrow.

"What? Don't say that you didn't have the same questions," shrugged June.

“That is so human,” muttered Doctor, dragging his fingers through his hair in frustration, tossing away the bang of hair falling over his forehead. “One person is already dead and we don't know who will be next. And instead of trying to do something to help them, first thing you are doing is trying to read me and what motives do I have to be here?” exclaimed the Doctor. His hands flailing around. “You need to just trust me. As soon as FBI and C.D.C. remove Travis from premise you will not get any meaningful answers as they will be gone with the body. But if we work together we can do that, we can find what was in this canister. We can find the cure and safe them. But for that to work, you just should to believe my word.”

“You seem to already know what it is,” sighted Ethan. “But fine. As you rightly notted we have no time for that,” said Ethan, turning back to June and Baz to announce his plan. “First we need to get everyone’s blood samples and then will work from there. We need to check how quickly the symptoms appear, and we need to make sure that this isn’t impacted by anything except to the substance they got exposed to. You two go with me,” Ethan said moving past Doctor to the changing area where hazmat equipment was stored.

“I’m going with you,” said the Doctor with determination in his voice.

“Good,” Ethan barked through the gritted teeth, knowing that he had no time to argue. At least not now. Mumbling to himself quietly.

I hope he knows what he is doing. And hopefully will not get himself into any troubles as his companion already did.

After ten minutes wearing hazmat suits four people entered the isolated room, watching how C.D.C. rolled out Travis, taking all the answers they needed with them. The Doctor could feel how his hearts squeezed painfully when his eyes landed on the woman sitting on the bed. Her head bended while she struggled to breath. Her face deadly pale as if all her liveliness left her, leaving only a shell behind. Her chest rapidly raising and falling as if her heart rate elevated almost to dangerously quick pace. And her body was shivering in the warmth of the room as if TARDIS was landed them once again on the South Pole in 1983 leaving her exposed to the cold, in nothing but her summer dress.

Without any hesitation the Doctor moved toward Clara cupping the sides of her face in his hands lifting it up to meet his eyes.

“Clara...,” he whispered tenderly, pressing his forehead, hidden behind the hazmat suit, to hers. His gloved hands brushed gently at her cheeks, listening to her soft pained breathe leaving her lips.

“I... I thought... I thought I could prevent it from happening. I thought I can save them,” the girl admitted. Her shoulders slumping with defeat.

“Oh Clara... my Clara... my impossible girl,” the Doctor said before cupping the back of her head with his hand. The other wrapped firmly around her, pulling her closer as he did once before after saving her out of his timestream. After she saved him, tearing herself into a million pieces, into million versions of herself. Living and dying through time and space, over and over again. Something what she was ready to do for Doctor and now he must find the way to save her.

“Doctor, what will happen now?” Clara asked softly, pulling him out of his thoughts.

“Now we will need to figure out what it was and how to deal with it. I would have done it much quicker with my scanning device, but I...”

“You cannot,” Clara finished the sentence. “Same as you cannot just tell them...”

“Sorry... I’m so so sorry, Clara,” mumbled Doctor.

“It’s okay. It’s okay,” murmured Clara rubbing soothing circles at his back before whispering to his ear. “Doctor, I believe in you. I believe that you can fix it. And if even you cannot fix it than no one possibly ever can. So Doctor what now?”

“I guess they expect me to draw your blood. Do I just poke you with this or what?” he tried to laugh it off corners of his lips lifting slightly in a weak smile,, showing her the syringe. His hand reaching for his hairs to drag his fingers through them out of habit almost knocking off protection helmet. His voice cracking a little watching the weakest of smiles lightning Clara's face. “I never done that before,” Doctor admitted, feeling how his hearts thundered violently against his chest.

He half expected Clara to protest asking for someone else to do that. But instead of any protest that could leave her lips she simply holded her arm to the Doctor. She watched him carefully palpating the vein on her arm, gently pressing a needle into her skin, breaking it carefully to draw her blood. He could hear Clara’s soft gasp watching how her teeth dug into her lower lip until he withdrew a syringe filled with her blood sample.

“Done,” he said surprised, passing the sample to Ethan, genuine smile spreading his lips.

“Great,” Ethan said, putting sample to others before turning back to Clara. “Now, Miss Oswald how do you feeling? Nausea? Stomach cramps?” he asked, sliding a blood pressure sleeve over Clara’s hand, taking her vitals.

“I feel nauseous and also my vision is blurred. Besides in the last half an hour or so my mouth tastes weird... kind of metallic,” she said involuntarily reaching out to scratch on her hand vigorously until Ethan stopped her putting his hand on top of hers, looking at angry red marks on her forearm.

“It seems like irritation patch. When did you get it?” Ethan asked carefully studying Clara’s hand.

“Must be a new symptom,” Doctor notted. “She didn’t have it even a few minutes ago. Also her blood pressure dropped significantly.”

But before Ethan could ask how the Doctor knows that, Clara’s small voice broke through.

“How do Danny and Beth are feeling? Do they have the same symptoms?”

“They have slight nausea, but apart from that...,” Ethan replied with a sigh and the slight shake of his head.

“It’s okay. I’m glad that they are okay,” Clara smiled weakly squeezing firmly Doctor’s hand to prevent herself from scratching.

She could feel how her stomach twisted painfully and she doubled with a groan, covering her mouth. With a great difficulty she rolled out from bed she was sitting on and staggered into the bathroom, emerging a few minutes later. Her face was slick from sweat, when she moved toward the bed. Her body swaying and Doctor quickly moved toward her catching her just a moment before her legs gave up, carrying her toward the bed to lay her down.

Ethan's eyes flitted to Beth, watching her sit at the edge of the other bed, her face clammy and her forehead rested against the bedpost. Her eyes half closed, while she spoke in a quiet hoarse whisper to Baz and June, still trying to attend to her symptoms and help them with as much information as she could. Asking all the right questions, trying to brainstorm the ideas ignoring the rising nausea. Quickly they came to the conclusion that Bobby's heart attack came so fast that they couldn't be completely sure what caused it.

“It could be anything, From allergies to the stress. We cannot say with certainty that his heart attack was caused by this substance,” Beth groaned leaning over the side of the bed and vomiting the content of her stomach into a sick bag that Baz held readily for her.

“So what do we have?” Baz asked looking around the room before turning to look at Ethan.

With a tremendous effort Ethan looked at him swallowing hard, willing himself to focus on the information that they had on hands.

“Vomiting, stomach cramps, blurred vision, metallic taste and irritated skin,” Ethan said, watching toward Danny as he reached to his hand absently scratching at it. “Miss Oswald also had her blood pressure dropped precipitously. I measured it again,” clarified he with a sigh.

“It can be anything viral, bacterial, chemical, fungal, and hundredth of things could cause these symptoms,” noted Baz exhaling in frustration.

“Than we need to get these samples tested immediately. We'll start with the most likely options and keep going from there,” said Ethan, watching how Baz and June already passed back through the disinfecting room, lingering behind a few moments, gazing at Beth. Finally, with a heavy sigh he moved toward the exit entering the room when he heard Doctor's pensive voice behind him, talking quietly so no one else could hear.

“But what if we start from the most unlike causes, the most difficult ones. What if the canister contained something that is unlikely to be cured. What if the cure is yet to be found?”

“Then everyone in here are doomed. And this is something I don't want to think about,” said Ethan without meeting other man's eyes.

“Just think about this. Because if this is the case every second counts,” said Doctor, passing by Ethan, ready to had toward the laboratory. But before he could do that his attention was caught by petit girl with dark hairs standing by the window. Her eyes red with tears. Her hands wrapped tightly around her midsection and her gaze fixed on the man laying on the bed.

“Are you a friend of his?” he asked, approaching the girl and standing beside her looking through the window.

“Yes. We... we are friends,” she said barely audibly. “And Clara? Is she... is she your girlfriend? I heard you called her name. Was here before all this happened. We were about to have lunch,” she clarified, noticing his perplex gaze, when she called her by name.

“No... Noooo, she... she definitely isn't my girlfriend,” he laughed uncomfortably. “Friend, yes... Definitely a friend. But girlfriend... No, no... Definitely not a girlfriend. Why would you even think so?” Doctor squealed, feeling how his face flushed almost ready to say his infamous Shut up, but the sad almost painful look on her face stopped him midword.

“Sorry, you just looked like she is your girlfriend. Didn't know this is a painful subject for you,” shrugged Sienna, but before he could reply anything she asked quietly. Her voice even quieter than before. “Will they be okay? Everyone keep saying that they will. All of my friends say that they are strong and young and that they will pull through that. But will they?” she spoke as to herself, but he knew that all these questions were directed to him, while he stood silently by her side listening. “Everyone says that Dr. Ramsey is a genius. Not as I doubt him. I know he is. And the way Beth and Danny, who both work closely with him, refer to the man. I know he is, but he still is only a human. I even not sure why I’m asking you all of this. You clearly are only human as well, but still... I feel like you are the only person who will be honest with me. So Doctor answer me, will they be okay?”

“Honestly... I... I don’t know,” replied Doctor, turning to look at Clara who was laying against the pillow with her hand grasping her stomach in another fit of cramps. “but what I know is that time is precious and every second of it is a gold. So I cannot promise you that they become magically okay, but what I can promise is that I will do everything what I can do along with a brilliant diagnosticians by my side to make it happen. I'll fix what still can be fixed. And if needed will make sure that help will be asked,” he said honestly, placing his hand on Sienna’s back and patting it awkwardly.

“Thank you, Doctor,” she said with a weak smile that touched her lips for the first time since he approached her.

“For what?”

“For being honest,” she said. Watching in amusement how the man scratched the back of his head abashedly. The corner of his mouth lifted in a shy smile and his cheeks tinted pink as if not expecting her to say that. After a moment of silence the Doctor backed away awkwardly waving his hands as if remembering something before twirling around and rushing toward the laboratory, leaving Sienna alone. Leaving her somehow believing to the man who seemed to appear from nowhere.

Tags: @jamespotterthefirst @the-soot-sprite @choices-bound @tsrookie @caseyvalentineramsey

#open heart #ethan ramsey #eleven dr who #eleven x clara #whouffle

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fallendom · 4 years ago

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JUSTIFIED CAUTION AGAINST MC. a matter that seems to be recurrent when it comes to LUCIFER is the hostile behavior he represents to MC upon their stay. there’s that underlying ignorance people fail to understand about his characterization that truthfully JUSTIFY HIS ACTIONS along with explaining why he was like this. from the beginning, LUCIFER was under oath by DIAVOLO’S proposal to create an exchange program where they’d have two angels and two humans participate in attending RAD. thus, they are required to write a paper officially describing their experience and what they thought about after attending RAD for the year in this program. the purpose of this program was to demonstrate COOPERATION BETWEEN THREE REALMS which are understandably separate but DIAVOLO hopes to at least make them come to a common line. in other words, he wants to prevent each of the realms from reaching a point where they’d end up destroying each other. he wishes to diminish conflicts between them and LUCIFER (due to his vow to serving DIAVOLO for all eternity) plays obedient to these circumstances. he does little to go against it and even dismisses hearing out his younger brother (BELPHEGOR) with his rejections about the program, mostly due to humans.

highlighting this aspect is important because it shows that LUCIFER was not initially hostile towards MC, nor was it personal to him in mistreating them. he does not hate HUMANS as BELPHEGOR does and actually shows signs of making certain MC is safe for the year they’re attending RAD. it was also recommended for MC to stay in HOUSE OF LAMENTATION because their life would be saved by the demons who are considered the strongest. the point of this perspective to lucifer’s behavior is that LUCIFER DID NOT HATE MC OR HAD DESIRES TO MURDER THEM like other people treat him as such. however, we shall touch on when and why his actions are justified in his perspective.

first off, MC is not absolutely innocent and their complete disregard of LUCIFER’S warnings are always ignored. knowing that LUCIFER hasn’t demonstrated signs of wanting to endanger their life, MC should have had some common sense when he requested they cease meddling into their business (aka going up to see what was up the stairs). they never took LUCIFER’S words to heart even if there was a reason why he asked MC to not go up the stairs. people would argue “why did he not simply tell the truth?” though it can be countered with why should LUCIFER entrust this secret that could potentially endanger BELPHEGOR? his purpose for locking him up the attic was out of PROTECTION FROM BEING CHARGED WITH TREASON; belphie practically threatened to murdering MC when they finally showed themselves to RAD. LUCIFER knew belphie’s unstable mentality and he was rightfully in a hurting state that he took accountable to the possibility of MC being killed off. he did not want to see ANOTHER SIBLING being killed because of a human AND for disobeying DIAVOLO as well. luci’s intentions were always centering around keeping his brothers safe and MC wanted to ignorantly disturb it by that curiosity when he understood murder impulses. yes DEMONS HAVE MURDER IMPULSES AND WILL ACT UPON IT (never forget and cease implementing human morality to demons) which is demonstrated in countless myths and other media. LUCIFER’S actions to warning MC were dismissed and he wanted to take some extra measures but it wasn’t happening due to plot reasons.

along the way, LUCIFER starts to notice that MC is oddly making PACTS WITH HIS BROTHERS and the numbers were increasing. that became a sort of warning flag in his mind mostly from the series of events that happened in the past. while luci has no hatred or dislike for HUMANS in the same level as BELPHEGOR, he does have caution/distrust from them. he’s a naturally distrusting demon who isn’t easily led astray and would absolutely LOATHE THAT BEHAVIOR, despite him being capable of doing it when he so pleased. LUCIFER attempted to remain neutral about MC’S INVOLVEMENT with his brothers, thinking it was out of harmless intent. but the more they began to pact with them, one by one, the more he grew suspicious of it. he understood they needed protection but why are they being obligated through a pact?

a PACT’S properties are a manner of tying them to a given HUMAN and they are usually commended like animals to doing whatever they desired. whether or not that human was up to no good, the demon would obey and THIS IS WHAT CONCERNED LUCIFER. as the oldest and the one responsible to watch over them, he actually feared this kind of change where his brothers are now making PACTS with MC. it would be a thought he wouldn’t consider if only one made a pact but along the story... MAMMON, BEELZEBUB, LEVIATHAN, ASMODEUS, AND SATAN were willingly (under the odd circumstances) making pacts with a regular human. why is this realization a contribution to his justified actions against MC? the answer is simple: LILITH.

as stated, LUCIFER’S INITIAL REASONS BEHIND HIS ACTIONS ARE TO PROTECT HIS BROTHERS. he is afraid of losing another of his brethren like they all lost LILITH under these influences. the common trait to what MC is is being a HUMAN, a human who could have the potential of leading them down. LILITH was their youngest sister and a heavy factor to belphie’s murderous/hatred impulses towards humans since she died due to a human. while the human wasn’t the actual cause of death, that human played a role into sending LILITH to her downfall where she committed a crime. by stealing a forbidden fruit to save this human from passing away, this is a high disturbance to the natural order where the human was destined to die from illness. she feared that fate because only LUCIFER knew how much she loved this human; this human treated her no different to any typical maiden and they loved her dearly. she was happy with this HUMAN as they grew close and LUCIFER knew due to his following her to the HUMAN REALM just to watch over them (yes he was always this protective). however, it was that closeness, that love, which brought LILITH to facing the consequences by FATHER as well as the other higher angels. they turned away from her and later the CELESTIAL WAR was instigated by LUCIFER himself. he did not want to lose her and her judgment was against his desires which became one of his reasons for this war. THE ABSOLUTE REASONS ARE USUALLY INDICATED IN HIS ACTUAL LORE but LILITH was someone he did not want to lose.

consider how this CELESTIAL WAR is heavily implied by both SIMEON and SOLOMON about it leaving carnage. LUCIFER had slain countless angels while other angels who fought by his side, including his BROTHERS, all died or fell from “heaven”. these events were a disaster and he has demonstrated heavy regrets when focusing on the RULEBOOK DEVILGRAM when bringing it up to MAMMON’S attention. LILITH, in the end, would have passed away that very moment if not for DIAVOLO’S interference and LUCIFER swearing absolute loyalty for all eternity. they all suffered those casualties and losing LILITH has impacted both the twins AND LUCIFER more than people are willing to understand. when tying the loss of LILITH as well as what became a role into that initial loss, we can already see the caution and “death threats” whenever handling MC. they are, in his eyes, making pacts with his brothers for unknown reasons and LUCIFER’S natural reaction is to grow suspicious. he cannot help himself for the possibility of losing another sibling which is what matters to him the most. yes, DIAVOLO’S friendship and vow is highly valued and won’t ever be forgotten though the demon lord himself can realize the important LUCIFER PLACES ON HIS BROTHERS AND WILL DO ANYTHING TO PROTECT THEM. he won’t hesitate to try in ending MC’S life should they become a threat to them. and ironically? that is what he stated when gripping MC’S wrist during their dance.

#♚ ┇ ❝ ` DISSECTING PRIDE AT ITS DEEPEST CORE ` / ( HEADCANON )#obey me lucifer #( yes i'm putting it in lucifer's tags because yes....this is how to understand him and not forget HE'S A DEMON. )

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marshmallowprotection · 5 years ago

Note

Hey, I hope you’re having a great day/night! If requests are open, may I ask for the RFA and an MC that has big scars all over her face and body? Thank you very much, I hope you’re doing alright :)

TW: scars

Yoosung

Yoosung wondered why you had always been so wary of meeting him in person. You were always happy to talk with him on the phone but when he got to talking about the party and the date drew closer and closer and closer... you started to really close yourself off and act wary around everybody, not even just him. He did try to ask Seven about it because he seemed to know something that he did not about you and that bothered him. He tried to coax it from you but he let it drop when you said it wasn’t... easy to talk about.

Then, everything happened with the hacker and he wound up having to spend a long time ensuring he wouldn’t lose his eye. He was patched up and felt like a real mummy, nervously fiddling with his hands as he waited to see you for the first time, and when he saw you, it did take his breath away, he knew it had to be you from the smile on your face. He just didn’t expect for you to turn to look at him and reveal the secret you had long hidden. He felt like he was the ugly one and you were the beauty. Scars or not, he loved all of you.

“Yoosung...” your voice was quiet, nervous even.

“You’re beautiful,” he breathed in a whisper, hand tentatively touching your shoulder with a gentle nudge. “I can’t believe I’m really here with you. I hope you don’t mind that I’m a mess. I just... I had to see you, with my eyes.. er, eye. I just had to... and it was worth it.”

Jaehee

Jaehee was happy to speak with you and you made her life feel right. It was really hard for her to get a handle on everything but thanks to your efforts and the efforts of Zen, it seemed like her life was going to get back into order and her plans for the future involved you in her life. There was no future that she saw if you were not in it, and she knew that everything would be perfect if you could be with her and help her cement her dreams. You never really told her how you looked or what you were like.

She didn’t know until the RFA event, and she caught sight of you from behind with an outfit that displayed a bit of skin, but not too much. But, she could tell from your sleeve that the skin had an abrasion. When you turned around to look at her, you smiled, but there was something nervous in it. She realized why you did not describe yourself as you must have been dealing with a lot of internalized shame over something out of your control. You had a few large scars but that was not something she considered herself concerned with.

“I’m sorry I’m not... more flattering,” you mumbled.

Jaehee shook her head, incredulous. “You’re stunning, Y/N. I’ve never seen someone shine brighter or have a warmer heart than you. Please, you’re lovely, I hope you know that. Scars or not, you’ve done nothing but help everyone this week and your heart is just as beautiful as you are.”

Zen

Zen is a handsome guy, everyone knows it. They always assume to themselves that he is a shallow guy and he only cares about looks but that is not the truth nor is it true to him. He struggled with his looks for a long time and he only got over it by overcompensating and trying to love himself in a pure way such as this. It doesn’t always work and his insecurities slip out, you were one of the first people he admitted this to and you kept that close to your heart and affirmed that he was okay the way he was.

He just didn’t know why you wouldn’t extend that back to yourself in any way, shape, or form. You were wary and laughed off his compliments as if you didn’t believe a word of it. It wasn’t until he had to rescue you that he realized why you had been so wary of your looks coming up, you had scars all over your body and you saw nothing in yourself that was beautiful because of the way society made its standards. By the time you were safe in his apartment, he could do nothing but hold you close.

“...Sorry, I’m not better looking,” you muttered. “I know you must have been expecting something else.”

Zen gripped his arms around you even tighter. “Your heart is beautiful, therefore, Y/N, you are beautiful. You wouldn’t tell me something like that, so don’t say that about yourself. You’re the most attractive person I’ve ever met.... leagues prettier than me. Beauty isn’t everything, at least, not the way society makes it out to be, you know? What’s beautiful is the way you shine. Your scars are a part of you and only shine with you.”

Jumin

Jumin is a man that doesn't judge others by the way that they look. He judges them by the way that they hold themselves, and when their true colors show, that is when he knows what kind of person they are. It matters not to him what you look like, just that you have a kind smile and you treat others with a level of warmth that no light could reach on its own. He loved talking to you because you always knew just what to say to calm him down and make him feel like the world was not going to crash.

When you came over to the penthouse to check on him, he didn’t expect you to come into the room with your eyes downcast. Your attention first on Elizabeth who you extended their warmth to, and then when he called your name, you looked up at him with that nervous smile. You had mentioned that you had a few scars which he assured you was nothing to worry yourself over with him. You still seemed scared of how he may react. It looked like the scar on your cheek trailed down into your neckline and underneath your sweater.

“Jumin...” was all you could manage.

“I see why you didn’t wish to talk to me about your looks,” he told you quietly. “I don’t know if you’ve heard this, but you’re beautiful. That may sound rather trivial and I’m sure others have used it in a different tone that you may not have liked but I mean it. Your kindness shines through and gives way to someone that has stolen my heart.”

Seven

Seven has his own scars. They liter his body from missions and while most of them are out of sight and out of mind, there are also the scars on his brain from the past that he cannot escape from. His pain is all around him and all over him and he knows that he can’t run away. It always haunts him but it was thanks to you that he felt like he could get through it. He just couldn’t admit that to himself for a long time. Just as you felt that you couldn’t admit to yourself that you felt that you were not beautiful.

You couldn’t hide from him through social media or CCTV, but some of it was obscured. He didn’t pry too much nor did he ask, he knew that the past was a touchy place for so many people. He knew you must have gone through a lot of hard things, but you tried to ignore it. It wasn’t until he had to rescue you from Unknown that he really got to look at you. The storm may have been over for a moment but you were still looking away from him. Even as he pushed you away, he made it clear it wasn’t about your looks. By the time that he admitted that he loved you and did wrong, he had to be honest with you.

“...I know it must be hard to look at me,” your voice was quiet, and a bitter little noise came out. “I don’t blame you. Sometimes, it’s hard for me to catch a glimpse of myself. I’m working on... that but sometimes, I know how others look at me with pity.”

“I don’t pity you,” he told you, sincerely. “I think you’re the most stubborn person that I have ever met. I don’t know if anyone has ever managed to get their point into me as hard as you have, and I’ve got a maid with a taser who has been trying for years. I’ve got scars too, but I have a feeling you would reassure me that they don’t make me ugly. Just like I need you to know that your scars don’t change how much I love you, or how beautiful you are.”

#anon #ask #mod kait #mysticmessenger #mysme #mystic messenger #yoosung kim #kim yoosung #saeyoung choi #choi saeyoung #jumin han #han jumin #hyun ryu #ryu hyun #jaehee kang #kang jaehee #tw scars

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empanator · 5 years ago

Text

Don’t Let Them Catch Us

Summary: It’s Portia’s birthday. She takes you around the palace for some sneaky, stealthy loving, but are you really as concealed as you thought you were? Turns out, getting caught isn’t such a bad thing after all. Pairing: Portia x MC x Nadia Genre/Rating: 18+ Length: 2,339 words (4.5 pages)

“A birthday adventure…” I wait outside Portia’s bedroom as she changes out of her work clothes. “I assume you’d like to get into a bit of trouble, huh?”

“Well,” her muffled voice comes from beyond the door. The door bursts open to reveal Portia in her low-cut, off-the-shoulders top and long, flowy skirt. With her orange hair scarf tied around her waist, her wild curls are free to bounce and sway along her exposed shoulders and back. She winks at me with a cheeky grin. “Yes and no.”

Intrigued, I prompt her to explain.

“I guess you could say the plan is to try and stay out of trouble.” Portia leads me out of her cottage, still grinning, and we stroll hand in hand to the main palace grounds.

Upon entering the garden, I can see some guards tending to their routes as usual. Suddenly, I yelp as I am jerked away from the path, nearly stumbling into a hedge. Portia shushes me and tucks me behind it, pressing me against the manicured leaves with a hand against my chest. “We can’t let them catch us,” she whispers, a roguish look in her eyes.

“Catch us doing what?”

“Doing this,” she says before gracing my lips with the lightest kiss. My mind jumps to our first kiss in the broom closet when we were sneaking around the palace, and my cheeks run hot. “Come.” She pulls me through the hedge maze, skillfully navigating every turn directly to the exit. We continue to skirt around the guards—behind topiaries (she kisses me at every one) and around the fountain (she nearly backs me into the water).

We frolic through the garden like this, playing some form of hide and seek mixed with tag that involves hiding from everyone but each other and kissing rather than a tap of the hand.

We make an evening of this—sneaking around the palace grounds and making our way into the palace itself, sneaking secret kisses, stealing intimate touches, trying in glee not to get caught by any of the palace staff or guards on duty as we pursue our shenanigans. We carry on from closet to closet, room to room. Each moment of contact produces deeper kisses, moving down to necks and collarbones, and increasingly risqué touches under our clothing until we feel pushed to our limits. Struggling to keep ourselves tame in these frequently used rooms, we decide that we need to find somewhere secure to release all the sexual tension we’ve built.

Portia rushes to the nearest side passage with a firm grip on my hand as I try to keep up, barely able to catch my footing. Her expert knowledge of the palace really comes in handy in a pinch. Hurriedly, she whispers, “This isn’t a servant shortcut or a guard route, so we should be fine.”

Should be fine?

She grabs me by the arms to face her as she backs herself against a wall in the empty corridor, pulling me close. I lean in and run my thumbs along the waistline of her skirt.

“Are you sure no one knows about this place?”

The mischief in her expression grew. “I didn’t say no one knew about it,” she giggled. “Milady is the only one besides me knows this one, but she’s in a meeting with the courtiers for another hour. So…” Portia bites her lip and weighs her hand on my shoulder as if to push me downwards. “We should probably get cracking!”

We exchange a quick laugh and one more kiss before she urges me to get to work. I kneel before her, gripping first her hips and then her thighs, kissing the fabric of her shirt that covers her stomach.

Portia squeals then covers her mouth as if to hush herself. “Hey! I’m ticklish, remember?!”

I laugh with a faux threat to tickle her again so the staff in nearby halls can overhear us. “Or maybe… you could show me a place where you’re not so ticklish.”

“With pleasure,” Portia blushes, her scheming smirk back in place. She lifts her skirt hem and flicks it over my head dramatically.

As the fabric settles over my head and shoulders, I settle in between Portia’s legs, kissing her ample thighs, moving inward inch by inch. “Better?” My voice is surely subdued beneath the draped garment, but Portia responds just fine.

“Much better.”

Wasting no time, I make good work of my tongue around Portia’s clit as she stifles the sounds that want to escape her mouth as best as she can. Her hands are placed gently atop the fabric covering my head, sneaking occasionally lower to pull me closer. I can hear the distant, heavy footsteps of guards along their routes, knowing we are well off of their radar so long as we don’t cause a ruckus. A few minutes pass of this escapade of secrecy, all background noise dissipating in favor of Portia’s quiet breaths and whimpers, until—

“Ahem.”

Someone had found us.

Portia gasps; I am frozen into shock, unable to move and still masked under her clothing. She clutches the skirt and pushes me away to land on my butt, trying to salvage any kind of cover story she can.

“M-Milady! You’re… you’re—”

“Missing out on all the fun, it seems,” Countess Nadia dragged out, smirking with amusement.

I scramble to my feet, pulled back to Earth by Nadia’s nonjudgmental and rather light-hearted reaction.

“My, my, dear apprentice.” Nadia’s fiery gaze catches mine as she assesses the situation. “I had a good feeling about you two teaming up for the investigation. It seems as though you are both having all sorts of good feelings of your own.” She saunters closer to us.

Still unsure whether to make excuses or play it cool, I stammer the first thing on my mind. “We… we thought you were with the courtiers.”

“Oh, I was. And now I am not.” Nadia chuckles, stating the obvious. “Those sorry excuses for a government have given me nothing but a headache. Volta and Vulgora are prone to bickering, and worms seemed to be the only thing on Vlastomil’s mind, so I cut our meeting short. I thought I’d refresh myself with a quiet stroll in the more private passages to my wing of the palace, but I do say you seem to have a much more… appealing idea.” She looks us both up and down, eyes nearly dragging over us.

Portia and I glance at each other, first speechless in disbelief, then grinning wildly as our minds jump to the same place at the same time.

“Well, Milady,” Portia starts while caressing my hand. She reaches out her other hand towards the countess. “If it’s really that appealing, we would gladly have you join us.”

After the briefest of moments, Nadia accepts Portia’s hand with grace, bending low to kiss, delicately, from the back of her hand and up to her freckled shoulder.

“Milady, why don’t we relocate to your private quarters? Or better yet,” Portia tries to be suave despite her deep blush, “mine.”

“O-or mine,” I chime in. Portia jabs me with her elbow.

“What, you don’t think I can find the thrill in a little… how one might say, romping about?” Nadia teased. “Right here, right now is just fine. You have already been caught in a very intimate position by the countess.” Nadia lowers her volume, adopting a sultry tone as she elegantly ambles around Portia to embrace her from behind. “Could one imagine more of a thrill than trying not to get caught with the countess?”

Any semblance of bravado quickly evaporates from Portia’s demeanor, and my cheeks feel hotter than they’ve been all day. Portia all too readily leans into the countess’ touch and strokes Nadia’s cheek with an arm raised above her own head just to be able to reach the woman towering above her. As Nadia stoops to gently nibble on Portia’s neck, Portia pulls me in by my shirt to kiss me, deeply. I am lost in a pleasure high as I also feel the countess trail her long fingers along my side.

I break the moment, one concern surfacing in my mind. “Wait, Portia said she and you are the only ones who know about this passage. With all the people who know about it present, do you really think someone else would wander into us?”

“Oh, they will know where we are when they hear the sounds that we can bring out of little Portia, here.” Nadia traces lines along Portia’s throat, then her lips. “So she had better be mindful of that mouth of hers. If she cannot, well, there are ways to handle that.” Portia gulps, the deepest blush spreading across her face. I can’t help but look deviously into Nadia’s eyes, signaling that she and I are on the same wavelength. After all, what good is this adventure without the prospect of consequence?

Nadia moves on to nibbling on Portia’s earlobe as Portia pulls down one of her own shirt straps, encouraging me to come close. I kiss and lick her newly exposed skin for a few moments, nipping gently around her breast until she again pushes me lower. I kneel where I had knelt before in front of her. Pulling down on Portia’s skirt slowly, I look up to find her approval and proceed to let it pool at her feet.

“So, you wanted a birthday adventure tonight,” I purred. “How’s this for you?”

“Y’know that saying ‘more than I bargained for’? That. Except in a good way.” My tongue dances around her clit again. I glance up to find her eyes shut, the countess fondling handful by handful of Portia’s exposed chest. Portia sighs, dragging out the words “A real good… good way.”

Portia steps out of the fabric left beneath her, careful not to break my contact between her legs. I pick it up and sling it over my shoulder. Nadia pays tender attention to Portia’s upper body, and I can hear one of her hands sliding down the material of the back of Portia’s top. Nadia stops momentarily to feel the soft flesh of her buttocks before traveling further downwards, teasing the skin right where her thighs meet her outer lips. Portia huffs, instinctively spreading her legs a bit wider.

“My, you are positively soaked,” Nadia whispers into Portia’s ear.

“Do it, Milady.” Her command strains through heavy breaths. “Please.” Nadia wastes no time and hoists one of Portia’s legs up to further widen her stance, plunging a finger inside of her, eliciting a gasp and hushed moan. Portia takes hold of my head to keep it steady despite her own movement. Both Nadia and I try to keep our affections in a rhythm with Portia’s subtle bucking, but Portia seems to grow more desirous with each passing moment.

More commands are issued to the countess and me, the urgency in Portia’s voice growing. “Suck. Hard. Milady, more fingers.” We oblige—I can feel Nadia slowly introducing a second finger as the movement of her hand grazes my chin. I begin with a kiss that evolves into a tight, suckling motion around her clit, entertaining myself with a flick of my tongue whenever I can to feel her body jolt at the sensation.

Portia groans rather loudly. Immediately realizing her mistake with a gasp and a hushed expletive, her hands shoot up from their hold on my head to cover her mouth.

But the countess is a woman of her word. She addresses me in a sweet, tempting voice. “Hand me that skirt, will you?”

I stop pleasuring Portia and hand the garment up to Nadia’s open, wet hand.

She continues. “We can’t have you giving us away like that, can we? My dear magician,” she looks down at me with fire in her eyes, “what shall we do?” She snaps the skirt taut between her hands, then twists it around her fist to form a ball, strongly hinting at what she wanted to do.

Thinking along the exact same lines as the countess, I respond. “Maybe it’s best if the birthday girl here had something else to keep her mouth occupied.”

Nadia raises the bunched up fabric to Portia’s lips, encouraging her in the same sugary tone as before to open up. Portia, however, does not need any convincing and gratifies our desire. Within the moment, we’ve resumed our touching, thrusting, and sucking while Portia can only bite down on a mouthful of her own skirt to suppress the noises that desperately want to come out.

As we feel her getting closer and closer to climax, we respond with a faster pace and heightened intensity until she is pushed over the edge. Her body shudders as she seems to be melting into us, grinding against me to ensure I do not stop and pushing down on the countess’ fingers to keep them deep within her. As if unable to control them, Portia’s exclamations begin to spill out, the skirt doing little more than merely muffling the sound enough to prevent an echo that would otherwise reach the main passages. Nadia covers Portia’s mouth with her free hand as we ride out the motions of the orgasm as silently as possible.

When all is calm and the skirt is no longer needed, there is only panting as we try to catch our breath. Portia, whose face is flushing pleasurably, is incredibly disheveled. Nadia straightens out her top while I slip her skirt back on. Portia can only manage a disbelieving laugh before speaking. “That really just happened.”

“Yup,” I answer, though I am also dazed and in awe of the women standing before me.

“Considering it is your birthday, Portia, I cannot deny you a simple request. Shall we revisit your earlier offer and retreat to your cottage?” The countess raises her chin to look down at me as if to size me up. “We can get this one taken care of next.”

#nadia satrinava #portia devorak #the arcana #mine #fanfic #fic arcana #text #nsfw///

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clansayeed · 4 years ago

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Bound by Destiny II, part 1 ― Chapter 18: The Side Effects

PAIRING: Kamilah Sayeed x MC (Nadya Al Jamil) RATING: Mature

⥼ MASTERLIST ⥽

⥼ Bound by Destiny II, part 1 ⥽

While struggling with nightmares of lives she’s never lived, a shadow from the past looming over her city, and the proposed idea that her life may just be a little bit too weird to handle alone, Nadya makes sure to tell herself that everything is perfect just the way it is. If only. When the self-proclaimed King of Vampires (and Maker of her sometimes-girlfriend and always-boss, can’t forget that little tidbit) Gaius Augustine returns intent on claiming Manhattan as the throne that was promised, she and her friends find themselves forced into the task of saving the world. But with millennia-old vampires and an Order of hunters on their heels as well as allies hiding catastrophic secrets at their backs… it won’t be an easy task. Too bad destiny didn’t exactly ask for her input.

Bound by Destiny II and the rest of the Oblivion Bound series is an ongoing dramatic retelling project of the Bloodbound series and spin-off, Nightbound. Find out more [HERE].

*Let me know if you would like to be added to the Destiny II tag list!

⥼ Chapter Summary ⥽

These things take time; a lesson Nadya is learning the hard way as she continues her psychic training. Guilty consciences are eased, an old flame gains new fire, and a night out on the town doesn't go as planned.

[READ IT ON AO3]

Six weeks later…

“Perhaps we shall make this our last trip for the night, ma chérie?”

There’s a hint of chiding in Serafine’s voice but it lacks real heart. That much is obvious by her amused little smile when Nadya throws a look back to her. It certainly doesn’t help the woman’s case that during these last few excursions into her halls of psychic memory she’s pretty much been given free reign. Like a kid in a candy store.

“If you’re saying that because you’re worried about me tiring myself out — I actually feel really good this time. So maybe, like, one more after this?”

Her enthusiasm gets a little laugh in return. “We shall see. It wouldn’t do to overexert yourself too soon. Now — come back closer please. We won’t be wandering aimlessly this time.”

She falls back in step at Serafine’s side; eyes widening in surprise. “Then why are we here?” A completely innocent question that by all accounts should have had an equally innocent answer.

But there isn’t one single instance in history when a stretched out and tense silence meant anything good. Well… she supposes she’ll find out soon enough.

There’s no doubt in Nadya’s mind that the real Hall of Mirrors in the real Palace of Versailles — only a metro ride away from their apartment — is still breathtakingly beautiful. She doesn’t even doubt that a connected woman like Serafine herself could get them into the Palace after hours for a real, physical tour of the place. But there’s a unique beauty to seeing it in its prime. Everything still fresh and new and dedicated to the Sun King rather than those who came after his reign.

There must be a hundred candles above and around them. But they are, for the purposes of this memory, a source of light rather than heat. Even when Nadya stands on tip-toe and brushes the flat of her palm through a steady orange flame she doesn’t feel so much as a tickle.

Just another oddity to hammer home Serafine’s first lesson.

You are not a participant in the world around you, here. You are merely a voyeur — there to observe and nothing more.

They reach the center of the long and glittering Hall. Serafine stops and gives her an expectant eye. “How are you feeling; has anything changed?”

“Nope — everything’s still crystal clear.” Even in her excitement Nadya knows the importance of these questions. This may look like a field trip on the outside but deep within it’s just another in a long string of exercises. And they’ve been working at them diligently; every night for over a month now.

Frankly it’s about time all her hard work started paying off.

Out of the corner of her eye Nadya sees a flicker in the normally steady light. The flames of half a dozen candles barely clinging to their candelabra’s moorings giving a little impromptu dance. Just a small wind, she tells herself; and chooses to ignore the contradicting stillness of the window drapes.

“Is something supposed to happen?” Is something happening already?

Serafine nods in reply. “Up until tonight, our focus has been on the first step — the crossing of the bridge between minds and memories. But memories aren’t portraits frozen in time. By their very nature they are alive and in an endless cycle.

“The task we’re undertaking won’t be one you can find in an abandoned landscape, Nadya. When the time comes you must be ready to bear witness.” If only the apology in the vampire’s furrowed brow wasn’t more unsettling than it was reassuring… “And I regret to say not everything you take in will be beautiful.”

The candles waver around them again. Casting long shadows and dewdrops of golden light across every shining mirror. Bitter experience has Nadya almost certain she does not want to look into one. Better to spare herself even a brief glimpse of any number of dark and horrific deeds.

That’s the thing about bad memories. They are far too easy to conjure up — no matter who they belong to.

“Perhaps we’re attempting this too soon.”

Concern catches in the woman’s normally carefree tone and drags Nadya’s attention back outward — makes her shake her head insistently.

“I’ve gotta do it sometime. We’re already here, so let’s try it.”

“Are you sure?”

“No pain, no gain.”

Whether the vampire believes her or not, she accepts it. The memory continues.

Sharp footsteps echo back in the direction they had come from. Serafine looks up with a strange resignation in her dark eyes; her normal soft-humored smile replaced with pursed lips turned down somber and stoic.

Nadya doesn’t have the chance to question her about it before Gaius waltzes through the open doors.

He’s not real — he’s not real—he’s not real. She repeats the mantra until the thought is all-consuming but that doesn’t make it any easier to see him. He looks exactly the same after all. As does the familiar cherubic face that skips happily away at his heels.

Marcel.

Every step Gaius takes is with purpose. His eyes are trained forward but from where she stands it’s like he’s looking right at her and even though her brain is a broken record screeching he’s not real he’s not real he’snotreal nothing can stop the noise she chokes out; the hasty one-two-three steps back she takes before he passes her right on by.

She breathes.

You aren’t a participant in this world. You’re just a voyeur.

Marcel’s face lights up and he takes off in a dash, calling out “Serafine, Serafine!” gleeful and grinning. Nadya turns just in time to see him leap into her arms. She swings him around in a full circle before setting him down. They exchange familiar kisses on either cheek.

All at once the child’s face goes sour. The delight of reunion now gone and replaced by something much more important. Nadya knows this because she can feel the trepidation rolling around her insides in that now-familiar phantom way. A feeling that only comes with memory.

“Tell me it isn’t true, Serafine,” he practically whines; throws an arm out behind him to gesture vaguely in Gaius’ direction where he hangs back from the pair politely, “please tell me it isn’t true!”

The two older vampires lock eyes. Serafine wars with the guilt creasing her brow. Her King, as ever, able to compose himself utterly porcelain.

“You know full well I wished to tell him myself.” Her dress billows out as she takes to her knees.

Gaius shrugs; clasps his hands together behind his back. “It happened to come up; in my defense I thought you had already told him.”

Child’s hands cup Serafine’s cheeks. Marcel’s lower lip wobbles.

“Why won’t you come with us?”

She covers one of his hands with her own. “My work here is not yet done, petit. Not while the Holy Knights still lurk in the Sun King’s shadows. Surely you of all people can understand that.”

“But where we’re going… there won’t be any Knights.”

“For your sake I would pray so.”

“Banner is coming; Kamilah too! I cannot bear the thought of leaving you behind!”

“And your love brings me unbounded joy, but —”

“How can you stay here Serafine,” he interrupts, “after everything they did to us? In the New World we can start a new life! One without having to worry about the Knights, or—or any of their silly human struggles.”

Serafine quirks an eyebrow up at Gaius. “I would dare say the struggles in a unfamiliar world would be far greater.”

The man inclines his head. “Steps have been taken to ensure we will be well-received.”

“How can you be certain?”

“Do you doubt me, Mademoiselle Dupont?”

There he is. The Gaius that Nadya recognizes, who she struggled to try and find under his powdered face and frilled collar. But she knew he couldn’t resist showing his true self for long. All this decoration is just another glamour. He’s still a monster beneath.

Quickly Serafine bows her head; speaks a low “Non, My King,” and is forced to wait until he silently accepts her apology to regard him again, “but I have seen the struggles of new nations before, as you have. What is to stop the Holy Knights from following you across the world? They have done so before; surely they would again.”

A shiver runs down Nadya’s spine as she watches Gaius’ eyes burn red. Dozens of flames reflected that give him an awe-ful power; something near godlike. Even though she knows firsthand he won’t see that kind of power for centuries to come it still leaves her frozen in fear.

The Vampire King smiles down at the pair cold; confident.

“I would hope they try. For then I will show them what happens to their kind in my Shadow Kingdom.”

The world around her begins to blur at the edges much to Nadya’s relief. Pinpricks of flames growing brighter, whiter; until they swallow her and the three vampires whole. Until Gaius and Marcel are left in the past and that version of Serafine with them.

Then all she sees is the black void and flashes of nameless colors behind her closed eyes.

Nadya waits until the high-pitched ringing in her ears dies down; gives way to the sounds of the apartment and the strange life they’ve built within it. She knows from tragic experience that coming back to herself, to her own head and the present with it, so soon would only end in nausea and the occasional nosebleed. Funnily enough she’d rather avoid that this time around.

When Lily’s laughter from the other room is louder than the noises in her head, Nadya knows she’s in the clear.

It takes a few blinks for her eyes to adjust. She reaches blindly and feels a cool glass slide into her hand. Her thumb brushes over Adrian’s — he waits patiently until she has the strength to hold it on her own. Each gulp soothes the itching, burning rawness in her throat. A welcome relief.

“How do you feel?”

“Honestly? Kinda fuzzy.”

She regains full and clear sight just in time to catch the furrow in Adrian’s brow. “‘Fuzzy,’” he repeats; and he’s two seconds from scribbling the word down on a notepad before she stops him.

“It’s okay. I’m okay.”

“But you just said —”

“Yeah, well…” Nadya turns her head to look across the table; to Serafine and her (rightfully, absolutely justified, totally warranted) guilty expression. “I wasn’t exactly expecting to hang out with Gaius tonight, so fuzzy is better than the alternative.”

The woman grabs for her waiting glass of wine and sips. Tries—and fails—to be idle about it. At least she isn’t pretending like she didn’t throw Nadya for a loop.

“What the heck was that about?”

Serafine swallows after a moment. “It was not my intention to sneak the memory upon you, Nadya.”

“Could’ve fooled me.”

“You’ve been progressing so well, ma chérie. The decision was a spontaneous one; not to mention a success, do not forget.”

“Yeah, but…” Surely she gets why Nadya’s not the happiest camper! “Did it have to be him?”

“I was advised you work well under pressure and with little time to think.”

“By who?!”

She regrets it the second she asks. No, she knows the answer the second she asks. It’s pretty obvious after all; possibly even more than since Nadya isn’t alone as she and Adrian whirl around in their chairs to look through the doorway into the living room.

Jax is just a little too focused on his book to actually be reading it.

“Nadya —” Serafine drags her attention back with a hand over hers, lacking warmth but still just as soft; she still tries her best to keep that frown front and center, “— you did remarkably. Far better than I could have hoped. Ask yourself; do you feel any of your usual aches or side effects?”

Under the pair’s scrutiny Nadya does go through her mental checklist. However reluctantly. The ringing is all but gone and whatever stomachache she’s feeling is probably because she hasn’t eaten — for fear of the nausea she doesn’t feel either. Every physical followup she’s experienced since they began the painstaking process of dismantling her ‘psychic walls’ either isn’t there or is so faint it’s easily attributed to being human.

Her defeated sigh is met with smiles from both Serafine and Adrian — rude of them but… still. “No,” she reluctantly admits, “but that kind of pain usually only happened when the memories were being pushed at me, you know? It was all chaos and noise and crowds and stuff I couldn’t understand. But… that doesn’t make what you did okay.” Since Nadya really doesn’t know which was worse; the pain of being practically assaulted with vampire memories or the stress of having to even look at Gaius’ dumb face.

At least she gives Nadya that. “I apologize for my deception. But this is fantastic news. It means we can begin pushing your boundaries, seeking what we need; what all of this time has been for.”

All of this time, she says; like Nadya hasn’t been struggling with her self-imposed guilt every single day. Like she hasn’t been pushing herself — sometimes a little too far too quickly — because it’s been six whole freaking weeks.

Six weeks of psychic Karate Kid training.

Six weeks of (admittedly delicious) gut-wrenching French food and wine.

Six weeks of absolute radio silence from New York.

“We will begin plotting our course tomorrow evening.”

Serafine drags her attention back to reality as she stands; Adrian with her out of habit. She grabs her coat from the back of the chair and folds it over her arm. The last look she throws Nadya’s way is a proud one.

“May I walk you out?” Adrian asks and offers her his arm. It takes everything in Nadya’s power not to burst into knowing and maybe even childish giggles. Like he hasn’t walked her out every night since they started this?

But hey — with roommates as nosy as them she gets his want for even a little bit of privacy.

The woman takes his offer with warmth in her eyes. “I would be glad of the company,” she accepts. The pair exit the apartment with remarkable grace; especially seeing as their sharp vampires ears definitely hear their audience’s laughter the moment the door closes behind them.

When she’s gulped down enough water to hope the Gaius in her head is drowning, Nadya joins Lily on the couch with a box of leftover macarons. It’ll be sunrise soon; not enough time for them to get into any trouble worth the effort.

“Any-f’ing ah’ all?” Nadya asks around her mouthful of sugar; jerks her chin in the direction of the news station Lily must have settled on some time ago.

It’s no surprise when Lily shakes her head. Nadya doesn’t even know why she asks anymore.

Yes she does. Because she’s Nadya.

“Are you sure you don’t wanna come with us?” But this is the third time she’s asked and by now the jig is up — Lily knows full-well she keeps turning back because it’s an excuse to try and inch her way away from the door. A way to try and find a reason to stay right along with him.

Judging by the wry amusement in Adrian’s little smile he’s pretty aware of it too.

“I’ve never really been a club kinda guy. But don’t worry about me — you guys go have fun and have a drink on my behalf.”

“See?” Lily all but snaps. “We’ve practically got his permission to go!”

Jax can be seen through the open front door; waiting in the hall with arms crossed over his chest and foot tap-tapping in exasperation. “You can’t force her to go if she doesn’t want to go, Lily.”

Which is something even Nadya has a hard time believing. It’s like he’s never met her or something. Or maybe it’s because he has — because he knows trying to convince her that she isn’t the Grand Master on High in Control of Nadya’s Fate will only ensure their night out could only be stopped by a nuclear apocalypse.

Nadya wrenches her wrist out of Lily’s grip with no small amount of effort. If she bruises, someone’s sleeping on the couch. “Nadi’ I swear to God —”

“I’m coming, okay?! Yeesh just…” Her words trail off when she looks back to Adrian. All on his lonesome at the kitchen table normally shared by at least two others, staring at his laptop screen with his usual work-busy furrowed brow and his index finger curled over his chin in deep thought.

“Just gimme a minute, okay?”

Lily holds her hands up in mock surrender. “Fine, fine. You’ve got three minutes before I haul you out over my shoulder. And don’t think I won’t.”

“I know you too well.”

“Damn right.”

She closes the door behind her, separating them and leaving Nadya and Adrian actually and properly alone. When it’s clear he won’t be looking up from his screen of his own free will she huffs her way over to him, practically stomping in her heels by the time she gets there, and forces the lid closed with an open palm.

Adrian jumps back, startled. Even with superhuman senses he gets too lost in his work too often.

“Well hey there stranger,” sarcasm dripping from her drawl, “welcome back to reality.”

Adrian tries to frown but there really isn’t any heart in it. He’s barely frowned at all these last few weeks — not unless Psychic 101 ends up leaving her with a headache the size of the Eiffel Tower. It’s been refreshing to see; which is what makes seeing even the shadow of it now all the more frustrating.

“Please come with us?”

He takes her outstretched hand and squeezes it with his own. “I’m not kidding about the clubbing thing, Nadya. And I don’t want you to miss out on my account. Go, have fun, enjoy the real Paris for once. Serafine is right — you need a break. I think we all do in our own way.”

Nadya’s eyebrow almost becomes one with her hairline.

“You know this —” she circles her finger around the laptop, “— this is the exact opposite of taking a break.”

“Not for me.”

She’s probably winding down on her allotted time. When Nadya reaches out Adrian meets her halfway; both of their hands together swinging between them. He’s probably thinking the same thing, too, since he throws a look towards the door fully under the assumption Lily is about to storm her way right back through. Likely while using Jax headfirst as a battering ram.

Adrian brings her back to reality with a tiny squeeze. “You don’t have much time left to tell me why you’re really so hesitant. I’d use it wisely.”

Nadya whines; it comes out more petulant than anxious which definitely wasn’t her intention in the least. Luckily Adrian knows her pretty well already.

“Are we bad people for doing this?” She asks, and bites her bottom lip.

“What, going out?”

“Doing something fun.” Because Kamilah definitely isn’t having fun. Maricruz definitely isn’t having fun.

So by that logic they definitely shouldn’t be having fun. Right?

“Nadya… c’mere.”

And this, right here, is the reason she’s okay with not being able to double back to her apartment for her anxiety blanket. Adrian’s hugs are just as fulfilling; just as calming. She buries her face into his shoulder and squeezes so tight her arms start to prickle with pins and needles and he knows just the right amount of pressure to give back.

He pets her hair with a small sigh. “I don’t think I’m telling you anything new when I say this, but things… aren’t all that great right now.”

“Wow, really?”

“Really. But this may surprise you — things are still going to be not-so-great tomorrow. Or the day after, or the day after that. It’s terrible, I get it. Every night I wake up and my first thought is always the same; ‘this isn’t the day I’m going to fix things.’ And that eats me up inside. I’m sure you’ve seen it… because to me it feels like if I try and pretend I’m not battling those thoughts then I’m doing a disservice to everyone who stayed behind; especially to those who didn’t have a say in the matter.

“And there’s nothing wrong with feeling that way, or thinking negative thoughts. In fact, I think they can be great reminders for what we’re working towards, here. What everything is for.” Adrian eases her back, practically forcing her to look him in the eyes. He may be smiling more but in the end that doesn’t make up for the fact that Adrian likes to shoulder a lot of the world’s emotional guilt. Nadya does, too. It’s probably why they get along so well, huh? “But if you don’t step back and remember what makes the loss of something so sad to begin with, then you can get caught up in all that negativity way too easily.”

Nadya’s sigh is a heavy thing, but she feels the weight — the burden of it lessen like the oxygen in her lungs. Adrian’s right; they both know it. But how dare he use his years of experience and immortal wisdom against her like this.

How dare he make her feel so young.

“I know.”

He nods. “Kamilah stayed behind because that was the right thing to do. But I think we both know she’d be giving you the lecture of a lifetime if she knew you were spending all your time beating yourself up about it.”

Ugh, true. “Yeah, and when she would be done all the time for going out would have been used up.”

“Exactly.” He kisses her forehead and tries his level best to shift her hair back in place. He fails, of course, but nobody’s perfect.

“So go and enjoy yourself for tonight. You’ll feel less guilty tomorrow, I promise.”

“Promise me you won’t brood here all alone tonight, instead?” Which makes Adrian laugh and leaves Nadya more than a little confused. Less so when she catches his smile.

“Who said I’m going to be alone?” He glances at his watch. “Serafine should be here soon. And you guys were supposed to be long gone by now.”

Ew. He’s staying behind to get lucky.

“Just… don’t forget to put something on the door,” after a quick ruffle to his hair for revenge, Nadya slings her purse over her shoulder and makes to scram, “your tie, a sock, something. I’ve seen enough things to scar me for this lifetime.”

“Not funny, Nady—!” She cuts him off with a closed door.

Jax heaves loudly. “Finally — can we go?”

With Lily’s arm looped in hers Nadya starts to walk rather than give him a verbal answer. “This side of you scares me, you know that?”

“Not me,” Lily chimes in, “after my banger I’m convinced you were a regular Travolta in your heyday.”

“White suit and all?”

“White suit and all.”

Their laughter follows behind Jax like a banner of shame all the way down the apartment stairwell.

By the time they make it to Hip-Trendy Parisian Club Number Three, there’s nothing left for them to do but finally be honest with themselves.

None of them are really “club people,” and even if they were there’s something so fundamentally wrong with the sight of people partying, kicking back; enjoying their lives. Of course these random strangers don’t know any better; their lives are weird and complicated in their own unique ways but for Nadya, for Jax and Lily? All they see are blissfully ignorant victims dancing and grinding and drinking their way through the end of the world.

Not that they don’t nab a few of those drinks for themselves on the road to enlightenment.

Lily forces her way none-too-gently through the throngs of neon-clad pretty faces, finally arriving to their little standing table like she’s made it home from a decade-long war. Nine shot glasses scattered on the tray, more than half of them the same color purple as her locs, and they all grab one and raise the first drink in cheers the same way they had at the club before this, and the club before that.

“For Kamilah.”

“For Mari. Salud.”

“For the Shadow Den.”

In what is now a well-rehearsed choreography, the trio knock back their glasses with gusto. Is she following Adrian’s advice and trying not to wallow in guilt, yes. Does that mean they can’t take a drink for the things their hearts ache for, absolutely not.

Artificial lime flavoring does wonders for masking the alcohol’s burn all the way down to her stomach where it settles just about as well as every other weird flavor before it. When Nadya comes back up she sets the glass down a little too heavy-handed; lets her world spin for a moment in ways that have abso-tootly nothing to do with vampire memories or psychic visions.

Well, that’s what she thought, anyway.

Her brain has a different idea and has decided (without her permission, to be clear) that it’s totally okay to blur the lines between reality and memory. It wants her to see things that aren’t actually there.

Oh, he looks like he is. Sticking out like a sore thumb in his crisp but ill-fitting suit and a scowl that probably sealed in place when he was Turned. Among the party-goers and club kids he’s not easily missed and the fact that he isn’t even trying to blend in all but hammers home the fact that he can’t be real.

Much to her surprise Nadya doesn’t even have to think hard to place where she’s seen his face before. Then again all of the Baron’s goonies look the same at the end of the day; stock-cut henchmen out of a bad British spy flick.

One second he’s standing there, a literal sore thumb in the neon-colored chaos. Three blinks later he’s gone; retreated back into Nadya’s unconscious where she will, inevitably, replay the events of that night on the airstrip over and over and over again.

“Welp, it’s official,” Lily takes her remaining two and knocks them both back together, because why not apparently, “we are the biggest bummers to ever bum around Bummertown.”

It’s enough to bring Nadya out of her Bloodkeeper weirdness and back to the others. Jax, leaning over the table with his head sagging onto his palm, looks to her for translation. Not the first time tonight.

“We’re very sad, dear.”

“Oh, yeah. But that’s not a real place, right?”

“No, dear.”

He clicks his tongue and takes his time sipping something with edible glitter swirling around inside. Flecks shimmer in dazzling rainbow on his upper lip when he’s done, but she can’t muster more than a “heh-nheh” at the sight.

“That’s the double-edged sword of being a mosquito, you know?” Lily looks at them both like they should very much know what she’s talking about. They do not.

Nadya pushes her glasses up carefully. “Uh… pardonnez-moi?”

“You know…” flicking over one of the empty glasses, “on one hand, you can’t get drunk. No hangovers is literal nirvana. On the other hand, you can’t get drunk. And I think I’d give my left tit to be drunk right now.”

“You did always prefer your right one.”

“It’s better shaped.”

Twin looks make their way to Jax at the same time, and finally there’s something worth laughing at. He’s looking between them like they’ve burst into spontaneous French and he’s never heard the like in his life, and that’s pretty freakin’ hilarious. He doesn’t even let her try to translate in between bouts of laughter; just holds up his hand and looks away with a disgruntled “I don’t want to know, I really really don’t.

“But —” and doesn’t that make them snap back to attention, “— I’ll agree about the booze thing. It’s not hitting the spot, you know?”

Lily nods in solidarity. “Just what I was thinking.”

“We could always try somewhere else?” Nadya offers, and tries not to look as utterly offended as she feels by the mutual sympathy the vampires send her way.

“Not like that, it’s… Lily, you explain it.”

Subtle wink. “It doesn’t —” —subtle wink— “— hit —” —subtle wink— “— the spot, Nadi’.”

Not the way Jax would have done it but he did hand it off, so that’s on him. “Not like we were dining out every night at the Shadow Den, but sharing the rations on Raines’ plane between three vampires doesn’t even reach the bare minimum. D’you get it now?”

Yeah, she got it after the first wink, but thanks for hammering it home. And she feels pretty bad about not considering their plight earlier — choosing instead not to look when the day’s blood bag makes the rounds rather than make sure everyone was getting their fair share.

As she sweeps a long look over the crowded club, though, it doesn’t seem like one or two people heading off for an hour or two would be all that noticeable. Right? The advantages of fast-paced urban crowding.

“If you guys need to, like, do the thing, I could be lookout?” she offers. Jax doesn’t miss a beat to laugh, like she’s suggested robbing a bank to meet a measly bar tab, but when he glances to Lily she isn’t joining in. In fact, she looks incredibly thoughtful.

“No.”

The younger vampire whines and stops her foot against the concrete dance floor. “Come on… we’re careful! And it’s just once.”

“We haven’t scoped the territory, noted the exits… we’d be sitting ducks for that order of hunters.”

“I get that,” Nadya agrees in earnest, “but do you really think there’s enough of them to scope every club in Paris, or even all of Europe?”

“I think risking it is inviting trouble.” And maybe she’d be content to let the matter rest if he looked as sure as he sounded. But it isn’t a trick of the lights that have his eyes changing color; Lily’s either. Nadya recognizes the look and by now she’s been around vampires long enough to know when the hunger starts to hurt more than the reasons for it help.

All it takes is for Jax to look at the flicker of desperation Lily normally keeps hidden in her eyes. Maybe it’s easier for someone else to feel it, too. “Okay, okay,” he grunts out, immediately sliding into a different kind of leaning stance. One that reminds Nadya of a tiger; of the predators they actually are. “But we do this as carefully as possible, and we need to find someone who won’t think twice about what’s going on.”

Lily grins wickedly. “So someone high off their asses, got it.”

Anyone else — and perhaps even a version of Nadya in which none of the events of the last year-and-then-some have never happened, thus making her staggeringly normal — would—should—find this to be ‘too far.’ But that version of her doesn’t exist. The last year-and-then-some did happen and Nadya would rather her friends do what they can to keep themselves safe and strong and very much not easily beaten bloody. Despite all of that and with her compromised morals aside, though, she draws the line at actually helping them find someone. That’s a bit like asking a vegetarian which beef tenderloin looks the best, isn’t it?

The girl Lily and Jax finally agree on is ordinary. Well, ordinary in a hangs-out-in-French-clubs kind of way; so almost alarmingly pretty in ways Nadya doesn’t want to describe for the health of her own self-image. There’s a moment where she wants to question their choice only because she doesn’t… look like she’s on something. But when Jax goes over with his dark hair swept a bit over his eyes and the top three buttons of his shirt undone and does his thing — Nadya realizes she’s just a hilariously bad judge of sobriety.

Probably doesn’t help that she’s not too sober herself.

Could be minutes, could be ages, either way Jax finally gets the young woman to follow him out through the back door of the club. “He told her he had a motorcycle,” Lily tells her, making sure to lean in and keep both of their heads down as they abandon the rest of their drinks and follow soon after, “which actually isn’t that bad of an idea.”

“What a gentleman.”

“Actually you’d be surprised. He dresses like a bad boy but he’s pretty tame once you get to know him.” No matter how much she wants to doubt it, though, Lily would know wouldn’t she?

Abandoning the humid atmosphere of the club for the outside world is like traveling to a whole different planet. And it’s one Nadya isn’t sure they should be on; not when the abrupt shift in all her major senses acts as a big fat slap in the face to the fact she’s definitely had more than she thought. It’s like the lack of constant thrumming of bass in her veins throws her off-kilter; has Nadya reaching out for Lily’s arm to steady herself on something, well, steady.

“You sure you’re okay to be lookout?” She gives Nadya a once-over that’s just long enough to show she’s reconsidering. Which simply cannot do. So she pulls up her Big Human Girl Pants and practically shoves Lily away.

“I’m fine!”

Lily’s eyes narrow in suspicion. “I dunno… you’re reminding me of Easter again.”

“Hush, we promised never to speak of Easter.”

“Well at least you remember that.”

It’s the perfect place for this sort of thing; an alley only open at one and and with a large chunk of old wooden pallets stacked precariously against one wall and a dumpster pressed up against the other. The smell isn’t exactly what Nadya would call appetizing, and it can’t be much better for Lily’s hyper-senses, but the hunger wins out over bad smells just like it does over continuing to argue. She squints through the fingerprint smudges on her glasses, trying to catch a glimpse of Jax in the darkness, but all she can see are shadows. Can’t even tell if they’re moving or not.

“Is he back there?” Turns out sight isn’t what was needed, though. Nadya isn’t exactly familiar with dingy alley makeout sessions but she does know what intense kissing sounds like. “This is gonna scar me for life.”

Lily pecks her cheek; when she pulls back her eyes are bright and red and near-primal. “You’re the best B-F-F ever, you know that?”

“Yeah, yeah, go… slurp or whatever.”

She’s lookout, remember? No amount of money could get her to follow and watch.

With a couple (light) smacks to her cheeks and a big gulp of wintery air Nadya whirls around on her heel. The club back door is on her left, the mouth of the alley dead ahead — oh yeah, nobody’s gettin’ in here without her knowing about it.

Well… nobody except for the returning hallucination of Evil Henchman #1.

“Just ignore him, he’s not real…” Nadya mutters under her breath. The same thing Serafine had her say the first time this had happened, and every time after. Eventually her psyche will re-align itself or… re-build her defenses or… whatever technical term there was for the echo of her own memory going away on its own. “Or at least try and think of someone less ugly.”

The hallucination frowns; deep lines carving themselves into his face all the way up around his lumpy bald head.

Nadya’s halfway to pulling out her burner phone to beat Lily’s high score on ‘SNAKE’ when it dawns on her.

Hallucinations don’t react.

“Found you.”

#bloodbound #bloodbound fanfiction #chocies bb #kamilah x mc #adrian raines #lily spencer #jax matsuo #serafine dupont #bloodbound mc #mc: nadya al jamil #; my fics #fic: oblivion bound #oblv: bound by destiny ii #oblv: new chapter #gaius augustine

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heauxplesslydevoted · 5 years ago

Text

The Bet (Liam x MC)

Prompt request from @princess-geek. #61 “What’s my prize?”

Warning: This one gets a little steamy at the end, nothing explicit though

~v~

Liam usually loves balls and formal gatherings. He loves meeting people, building connections for his country, and traveling.

But it’s day 3 of his stay in Spain, and he’s absolutely exhausted. He and Kendall embarked on a mini European tour, starting in Portugal and concluding in Italy.

Not only is he tired, but the events are downright boring. After a while, he gets tired of talking about politics with dukes and counts. The King Liam facade only lasts so long before the real Liam gets antsy.

They’re currently at a party being thrown in their honor at one of the opulent villas in Barcelona as the visiting monarchs, but actually enjoying the party is the furthest thing from his mind. He wants to be anywhere else. After traveling through Spain via train all day, he’s ready to decompress.

His Queen is a different story however. Despite being 15 weeks pregnant, she has more energy than she knows how to handle. She’s glowing, even. He watches as she effortlessly glides through the ballroom, her floor length gown sweeping the floor with each step. She’s like a magnet, attracting the attention of everyone around her. Everyone wants to be in her presence. Everyone wants to talk to her, whether it be about diplomacy or old fashioned gossip. He’s glad that at least she’s having a good time.

She must feel his gaze because she looks over and waves at him. He graces her with a smile in return. He sees her politely whisper something to the dignitary she’s talking to before excusing herself, walking over to him.

“Hi handsome.”

“Hello gorgeous,” Liam greets back. Instinctively, he wraps an arm around his wife’s waist pulling her close. “You’re the life of the party tonight.”

“I’m the life of every party,” Kendall corrects with a smirk.

“Of course.”

Kendall looks at her husband. He’s not his usual cheery self. “Is everything okay?”

“I’m just tired. And bored, if I’m being honest.”

Kendall frowns but she does notice the slight bags under Liam’s eyes and the lack of the usual enthusiasm. All of the travel is finally wearing on him. “I can get us out of here,” she says.

Liam chuckles. “It’s a party thrown in our honor, my love. And we aren’t on our home turf.”

“That’s never stopped us before.” Kendall reaches up and runs a thumb across her husband’s cheek. “I can get us excused within 5 minutes.”

“What if you can’t?” Liam challenges.

“Want to bet on it?”

“Sure. What’s my prize?”

“What do you want it to be?”

Liam goes silent, contemplating a response. “If you lose this little wager, you get to take my place in that meeting with Neville and Langdon next week.”

Kendall groans and drops her head against her husband’s chest. “You know how much I cannot stand that sniveling little toad.”

“I know. That’s why I’m putting you up to it.”

“Fine. But if I win, you have to promise to sneak away with me during this little trip for a few days. You, me, and a little house in Tuscany, overlooking the vineyards.”

Liam lifts Kendall’s hand and kisses it. “You drive a hard bargain. But you have yourself a deal.”

“Great.” Kendall’s eyes scan the crowd until they land on the monarch, King Felipe and his wife, Queen Letizia. They’re pleasantly conversing with someone. “Follow my lead. The clock starts...now.”

Kendall and Liam walk over to the other king and queen, hand in hand. Kendall sweeps into a curtsy, getting as low as her dress and new baby bump allow. “Your Majesties.”

“Ah, Queen Kendall!” Queen Letizia smiles at her. “You look radiant.”

“Thank you.”

“We hope you’re enjoying the party.”

“It’s lovely,” Kendall says. “And that’s why I feel so terrible.”

“What’s wrong, dear?”

“I’ve been trying to put on a brave face and ignore it, but I am feeling downright horrible right now.”

Worry flashes across Letizia’s face as she appraises Kendall. “What’s wrong? Is it the baby?”

Kendall’s body language shifts. The bubbly woman Liam saw a few minutes ago is gone. Her posture loosens, her body slacks against his. “I’ve been feeling nauseous all day. I’m usually able to handle it, but it’s actually kicked up tremendously now that I’m my second trimester. And no one really mentions all of the aches and pains you feel, and I think all of this travel is wearing on me.”

Letizia nods understandingly, having had two children herself. “Please, please go get some rest.”

Kendall rests a hand on the small swell of her belly. “Are you sure? You went out of your way to throw us such a lavish party.”

“As the Queen, I insist. You go inside and get some sleep. We’ll have this party cleared out soon enough. King Liam, you go take care of your wife.”

“Of course, Your Majesty.”

Kendall and Liam bow and hastily make their exits, avoiding people who would try to talk to them. Bastien keeps a safe distance behind them, but he follows them until he sees them disappear into the villa and upstairs to their suite.

Kendall flings the door open, giggling like a little kid. Liam watches her in amusement, and softly shuts the door behind him, locking it. “So? How did I do?”

Liam checks the time on his watch. “I’m impressed. You managed to do that in less than 5 minutes.”

“So I win.”

“You win,” Liam confirms with a soft smile. He meets his wife halfway in a quick kiss.

Kendall pulls away. “As the winner, I think I’d like to add one more prize.”

“And what would that be, love?”

“I decree that the loser of this bet should make love to his wife. If he’s up for it.”

“Oh the king is always up for that.”

Liam backs Kendall into the wall closest to the door and he captures her lips in another kiss, this one much more heated than the last. His hands find her hips and he pulls her flush against him, groaning at the contact.

He leaves feather light kisses on her cheek until he reaches the spot below her ear. He feels her shudder against him. “Have I told you how absolutely stunning you look tonight?”

“Multiple times,” Kendall replies breathlessly. Liam bites down on her earlobe and she gasps. “Though I won’t be opposed to hearing it again.”

“You’re beautiful, my queen,” Liam whispers into her ear. He lifts one of her legs and bunches up the hem of her very expensive gown. One of his hands slips beneath the dress, fingers gliding along the silky skin of her leg, as Kendall writhes under him. As he gets further and further along, he’s shocked to discover nothing but warm and wet flesh instead of one of the scraps of fabric she deems underwear. “You don't have anything on under this dress.”

Kendall nods and arches her hips forward, silently begging to be touched. “I know.” Liam doesn’t take the hint, stopping his ministrations.

Realization dawns on him. Liam chuckles and continues his previous activities, his fingers lazily running up and down her center, not really doing much but coaxing small whimpers and groans out of her nonetheless. “I’m starting to think you had that little escape planned out all evening. It wasn’t something you came up with when you saw me, huh?”

Kendall’s smirk is all the confirmation he needs. “And what if I did?”

God, did he absolutely adore this woman. “Then you’re more clever than you get credit for being, my queen.”

“Damn right, I am.”

“Now, I believe I was in the middle of giving you your prize.”

But tonight, they’re both winners.

#playchoices #the royal romance #king liam #king liam x mc #sentence prompts

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stardust-writer · 5 years ago

Text

beautiful ghost [Mystic Messenger Week Day 7]

Written for @mysmeweek2020‘s 7th day prompt: a Free Day! This is so rushed because it was meant to be posted earlier, but my laptop decided to shut down and stay that way for over six hours. I might revamp this later in the future, but it will stay this way for now.

Summary: Areum wakes up in a hospital and can't find Jihyun.

Warning/s: Near death experience, comatose, swearing, Spoilers for V Route

A/N: I have a different OC for each route. Areum Song is the OC I use for Jihyun/V’s route. Other OCs may appear, but for this work, Areum takes on the MC’s role. This work contains information that cannot be deemed accurate. I’m no medical expert, so please do not consider anything I’ve written here as something that could happen in real life.

Song While Writing: Beautiful Ghosts - Taylor Swift

“Areum.”

“What is it?”

The look Jihyun gave her was concerning. He was smiling, but it didn’t reach his eyes. Perhaps it was just the pouring rain, it made it difficult to see, after all. Still, the energy that her husband was emanating did little to soothe her nerves.

“Nothing,” he said simply. The traffic light turned red and the pedestrian light switched to green. He wraps an arm around her shoulders, pulling her further under the safety of the umbrella he held. “I just wanted to tell you that I love you.”

Areum quirked an eyebrow, but smiled nonetheless. They walk off onto the pedestrian lane.

“I love you, too, Jihyun.”

There it is again, a twinge of sadness in his mint-colored eyes. She wanted to ask about it but before she could even open her mouth, a flash of light blinded her vision and everything went dark.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The first thing she registered was the beeping of the heart monitor.

It didn’t immediately occur to Areum that she was in a hospital until she heard the unmistakable chatter of medical terms from above her.

Bright light clouded her vision as she attempted to open her eyes.

“Areum! Oh, thank goodness!” A woman that looked like an older version of herself came forward. Tears pricked at her eyes as she cupped Areum’s face with her hands.

“Mom?” Areum rasped. “What happened?”

“It’s okay, honey,” her mom breathes, pressing a long kiss to her forehead. "You were in a car accident, but you’re okay now.”

She held the hand against her face, feeling the familiar warmth. The haze that clouded her brain began to disappear and suddenly it all came back. The pouring rain, the barely visible pedestrian lane, the sound of a horn. Jihyun’s arm wrapped around her shoulder.

“Jihyun,” Areum said. She tried to sit up, but her mother pushed her back down gently. “Mom, where’s Jihyun?”

Her mother's brows knit together.

"Who?"

"Jihyun," Areum breathed. "My husband?"

There's a moment of silence. Areum felt a tension build in the room. Her mother stared at her strangely then laughed nervously.

"That's funny, sweetheart." Her mother caressed her hair, still smiling. Areum could only look on, confused. "Husband! I suppose you had kids, too?"

"Mom," Areum pushed her mother's hand away and made another attempt to stand up. "I'm serious! Where's Jihyun?"

The laughter in her mother's eyes disappeared. It shifted to concern. She meant to say something, Areum knew because she parted her lips, but a doctor approached before anything could be said.

"Song Areum?" The doctor addressed her.

Warily, Areum nodded her head in recognition.

"Hi, I'm Dr. Lee Hyeok. How are you feeling?"

"I'd feel better if someone told me where my husband is."

A look of realization then sympathy crossed Dr. Lee's face. Areum wanted to ask what made him throw such a look at her.

"Ah, before that, I'd just like to ask you a quick question." He smiled the way professionals did, charmingly and reassuringly, but without depth. "Do you know what date it is today? Or rather, what day your accident happened on?"

"Of course," Areum said. The fact that he said 'what day' like she'd been asleep for longer than a couple of hours bothered her. "It's July sixteen, twenty-twenty."

The same look passed over the doctor's face and beside him, her mother looked like she had just been struck by lightning.

"Ah. Alright, before anything else I'd like to inform you that when you were brought to the hospital on the day of your accident, you were in pretty bad shape." The doctor tried to send her another reassuring smile, but Areum had her guard on. At the moment, she had only been half-listening and her other half was still trying to figure out where Jihyun was. "We had to get you into surgery immediately and you fell into a coma."

Areum's attention immediately snapped right back to Dr. Lee.

"I was in a coma?"

Dr. Lee nods.

"For how long?"

There's another moment of silence. Areum could practically see the gears turning in the doctor's head, wondering if she could handle the answer.

Her mother was the one that stepped forward.

"You've been in a coma for four years, darling."

Areum felt her heart sink. It was like the world had disappeared. All she could hear in her head was 'four years'. She'd been asleep for four years. Then, a thought crossed her mind.

"Jihyun," she said. "What about him? Is he okay? He was with me during the accident."

The thought of Jihyun no longer being there crossed her mind. Jihyun not surviving. Her hands were shaking, she couldn't handle it if that were the case.

"Please, tell me if he's alright!" She begged.

Dr. Lee took a breath, then faced Areum with a serious stare.

"Ms. Areum, when a patient goes into comatose, they only become unresponsive on the outside. The brain is still very much active, and may sometimes play tricks."

Areum only looked at him with a confused expression. This wasn't the answer she was looking for.

"There are accounts of people who go into comatose and still stay aware of their surroundings, like hearing the people close by," Dr. Lee continued. "Others have accounted that it was like they had a brief, unrealistic dream where they met with 'God' or a respected and loved person that has passed on. And some have said that while in a coma, their brains created a world of their own."

"I...I don't understand." Areum said.

Dr. Lee gave her another pitiful look. Areum was beginning to get pretty tired of that expression. She turned to her mother to say as much, except she shared the same look as Dr. Lee.

"Today's date is July Sixteen, Twenty-Twenty." Dr. Lee said simply. "Your accident happened four years ago, on July Nine, Twenty-Sixteen."

The blood froze in her veins. Nothing was making sense to Areum. A headache was beginning to form, and she could barely register the doctor's next words.

"It is highly likely that your brain created some world of its own, syncing from the time you were in the accident to today, when you woke up. There's a huge chance that the memories you have right now are all just dreams your mind conjured while you were in the coma."

"No," Areum breathed.

It was impossible. She remembered it all so vividly. Saeran luring her to the Mint Eye, Jihyun's first attempt to rescue her, their wild escape with Luciel's help. She remembered Vanderwood, Jumin, Yoosung, Jaehee, Zen—even Elizabeth the third! She remembered the day Jihyun proposed, how he lifted her up and spun her around when she said yes. She remembered the day of their wedding, when they shared their first kiss as husband and wife, had their first dance, and left for their honeymoon.

They were all so clear in her head, they couldn't just be dreams.

"No, you're lying." Areum squeezed her eyes shut. The more she thought about it, each memory became hazier. "You're lying! Where's Jihyun?"

"Sweetheart, look at me, please."

Tears were now leaking down her cheeks, even as Areum did her best to shut her eyes tight. Her mother was pulling her into her arms now. She struggled, still calling for Jihyun.

"Darling, I know this all must be so overwhelming for you," her mother said. Her voice was trembling, and Areum felt the telltale drip of tears as her mother held her tight. "And I'm so sorry that it's happening. Let's just take a deep breath and get some rest first, okay?"

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A week passed.

Dr. Lee came in to check in on her everyday, each time trying to ease her into the reality of things. That Jihyun and her life with him was just a figment of her comatosed imagination. Areum refused to believe it.

She didn't want to. Her heart ached at the mere thought of it all, but even she couldn't deny it anymore. Things began to make sense when she took it into consideration.

The day Saeran lured her into the Mint Eye was July Nine, Twenty-Sixteen. She had no recollection of ever having the app he used to contact her initially, and she just went along with his early instructions without giving it much thought. The sly comments that Luciel made in the chatroom, indicating some sort of fourth wall that never seemed to make sense at the time. The way Jihyun looked at her the last time she saw him—eyes filled with a sadness that Areum only realized now meant it was time for them to part ways.

She felt a sob escape her throat. She hadn't even realized she was crying.

Areum loved Jihyun so deeply, so truly. She had an entire life with him and was ready to spend the rest of it just by his side. The fact that all those happy memories—the happiest she had—were simply figments of her imagination crushed her soul.

"Jihyun," she sobbed. She yearned for his strong arms to wrap around her, for him to press a kiss to her cheek and whisper that they would get through this, as he always did when she was upset. Except, the more she thought about it, the harder it became to imagine.

The more she tried to remember all her memories in the world she created, the faster they faded.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Three years later

Areum still thought about it sometimes. After she had been discharged from the hospital, she found herself trying to recreate the traces of the world she built in her mind.

She went to the ballroom she suspected that they always held the RFA parties at, to the mountains where Mint Eye's building would have been, or to all the places she and Jihyun would have frequented.

But after a while, even she lost sight of what she was doing.

The memories began to fade faster and faster, until all she had left was the memory of her waking up from her coma.

Wait, no. That wasn't true.

At night, in her dreams, the memories sometimes came back. Areum would feel a sense of peace as she's brought back to the world she's grown used to, to the people she loved and adored. But come morning time, they all disappeared, leaving her with a vague sense of sadness. The best she could hold onto was the ghost of a memory, one where she danced with a familiar warmth, but couldn't picture his face.

These days, the only place she revisited was the coffee shop she suspected she and Jihyun used to go to all the time. At this point, she's forgotten why she decided on that shop. She just knew that she liked the way they made her coffee, and that she felt at peace whenever she was there.

Today, she stopped by before heading home from work. People always asked her why she came after work instead of before, but Areum would just smile and shrug. Because even she didn't know, she just felt like doing it that way.

"Hello and welcome! What can I get you today?"

Ateum smiled at the clerk, at Jaehee. Jaehee began working at the café about a year and a half ago, apparently after leaving an office job she thought she could be content with. Areum once thought that maybe she's seen her before, but nothing came to mind. Still, she introduced herself and they've reached a point where Areum might even call them friends.

"Hey, Jaehee. I'll have a Caffe Americano for here, please."

"That's unusual," Jaehee commented.

"It is?"

"Caffe Americano is a little more bitter than your usual choices," she explained, punching the code in the register to generate a receipt. "You just always get a drink on the sweeter side, that's all—your total is 5,000 won."

"Huh. I never thought about that." Areum handed her the money and left to find a seat as she waited for her drink.

The café was a little slow today, so Jaehee left the register to her coworker—who Areum still couldn't remember the name of after all this time—and got a start on her drink.

Gentle music played through the speakers and echoed around the shop. Areum closed her eyes, smiling a little. The notes were familiar, and in her head she could imagine herself laughing as she danced around a hazy room with a faceless entity. She was so lost in her little daydream that she barely noticed the sound of the cafe’s door bell ring.

“Assistant Ka—”

“She’s not your assistant anymore, Jumin.”

The familiarity of the voices snapped Areum out of her reverie.

She looked around the cafe wildly, but stopped herself. She tried to remember what made the voices so familiar, but nothing came to mind.

“Caffe Americano for Areum!”

She shook her head in an attempt to reduce the strange paranoia she developed and headed for the counter. She smiled at Jaehee gratefully as she took the cup out of her hands. She took a tentative sip and almost immediately scrunched up her nose.

Jaehee’s right, she thought. This is too bitter.

She turned to leave. She’d rather just drink the coffee than tell Jaehee she didn’t like it. Except, before she could even take two steps away from the counter, a body collided with hers and spilled the hot liquid all over her.

“Ah, it’s hot!”

“Oh gosh, I’m so sorry!”

There it was, that familiar voice again. Areum’s gaze snapped up, and her heart began to beat wildly in her chest. In front of her, donning a similar surprised look, was a man with mint-coloured hair and eyes.

“I...er...It’s okay,” Areum managed to stammer. Those bright eyes were so familiar. The way his brows creased with worry almost made her want to smile for no reason other than that she found it strangely endearing.

“No please,” he said, grabbing a tissue off the counter and offering it to her. “It’s my fault. Let me buy you another one.”

“No, really, it’s alright,” Areum laughed this time. It felt natural, so easy. She took the tissue gratefully and began to dab at her blouse. “I didn’t really like the drink much anyway. But thank you, er…?”

“Jihyun,” the man supplied, hastily handing a hand out for her to shake. “Kim Jihyun.”

There’s a twinge in Areum’s heart at the mention of the name, but she can’t seem to figure out why. Instead of paying it any mind, she took Jihyun’s hand and gave it a shake.

“Song Areum.”

They’re both silent for a moment, just staring at each other, hands still clasped together.

“I’m sorry,” they say in unison. “But have we met before?”

#MysMeWeek2020 #v | jihyun kim #v | jihyun kim / original character #stardustwriting

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cedarmoons · 6 years ago

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reversed nadia & tragic heroism

aka, stop dismissing complex female characters as bitches you heathens

to preface this meta: i’ve included screenshots where i can, but as tumblr only allows 10 images, i’ll also include transcripts of scenes i want to discuss. screenshots have been cropped to only include the text, and should be read from left to right. i have left out some filler text, and “blank” boxes are only meant to keep the image even. all mentions of “Nadia,” unless otherwise stated, refers to Nadia in her Reversed route.

tldr: Nadia is Textbook Tragic Hero, it wasn’t animal abuse, Nadia did not sell MC to Satan for one corn chip, and it certainly wasn’t “bad writing.”

Long ass character meta under the cut! obviously contains spoilers for Book XX, Judgement - Reversed.

So. I originally had no intention of playing any of the reversed routes, but there were some claims about Nadia (i.e., she abused Mercedes & Melchior, she killed Lucio in cold blood, and she sold out MC for her own power) that made me think HMST and play it myself. Unsurprisingly, every single one of the above takes does not provide any greater context whatever.

I changed four (4) things to get Nadia’s reversed route: I never encouraged her to talk to her sisters or ask them for help; I told her to send Portia away; I did not allow the Flooded District partygoer to talk to her in Temperance; I told her to kill Lucio in The Devil.

And playing Nadia’s route seemed incredibly familiar to me, though it took a little while for me to realize why: Nadia, in her reversed route, is the textbook Tragic Hero. The Tragic Hero has a “fatal flaw,” which leads them to commit catastrophic errors in judgement, which leads to their allies, family, and friends abandoning them and their own isolation, which leads to the Tragic Hero realizing (too late) the gravity of their own errors.

I can’t believe I’m busting out my degree for a mobile game because some people like to twist things, but here we are. Someone has to go to bat for Nadia when the narrative surrounding her the past 48 hours has been doing her so dirty.

Part 1: The Lucio Problem

Now, let’s get straight to the first bout of character analysis: Lucio’s death. Nadia does not, in fact, cut Lucio down in cold blood. Lucio actually gets her to stop, and she allows him to explain why he should be allowed to live, which essentially is “because then I can help you overthrow the Devil.” The following is a transcript of their conversation, starting with Lucio explaining how he was supposed to be the Devil (instead of the ghost goat form we see in early-to-midgame), up to and including his death:

LUCIO: “It should have worked too! It was supposed to work! It wasn’t my fault. The Devil played dirty, he cheated me out of my chance to win! But together, we can defeat him. We can do it right this time!”

Nadia stares at him for a very long time, then throws her head back and laughs.

NADIA: “Yes, because you’ve been so trustworthy in the past.”

NADIA: “You would become the Devil and spread your treachery further than even Vesuvia. You would do the same thing he is attempting. You would cause death and destruction. Neither of you deserve the title. If you want something done right... do it yourself.”

LUCIO: “I won’t lose here! I don’t lose!”

Lucio lurches forward, anger flashing in his eyes. He reaches forward with a gold-gauntleted glove - And stops, as blood gurgles up from his mouth, trailing down his chin. Nadia’s blade is plunged deep in the center of his chest, the blade finally finding its mark.

LUCIO: “...”

She pulls the sword out and he crumples, his last words lost.

It should be noted Lucio’s sprite isn’t bloodied during his “...” dialogue. It’s interesting that no one mentioned Lucio lunged for Nadia first, isn’t it? Of course, one can always say he sensed his incoming death, and only attacked in self-defense: this is a reasonable and valid argument. But he unquestionably moved first, and Nadia also killed him in self defense: hardly the cold-blooded murder I had expected going in.

It is not Lucio’s death itself that struck me in the writing, but the aftermath. After he is dead, MC can respond with either “Why did you do that?!” or “He had it coming.” I chose the former, and the following is the transcript:

MC: “Why’d you do that?!”

My head is still spinning. Nadia just killed someone in front of me... and she doesn’t seem to be bothered by it at all.

NADIA: “We knew it would come to this, MC. I couldn’t risk him causing more chaos and destruction. He would have always remained a threat.”

She pauses, reaching out slowly toward me.

NADIA: “You understand, don’t you?”

I’m interpreting MC’s “Why’d you do that?!” as a horrified growing realization of how far Nadia has fallen. They were the primary influence over the course of 20 books in shaping Nadia this way, but the way Nadia kills Lucio really cements her fall from grace for them. And Nadia, when she “reach[es] out slowly” toward MC, seems to know that MC has realized this. She says “You understand, don’t you?” — words that can easily be considered a plea.

You understand why I did what I did, don’t you? You understand I had no choice, don’t you? You understand there was no other way, don’t you? You understand I am not a monster, don’t you? You understand I do not want to lose you, don’t you?

I take a deep breath, still staring at where Lucio’s body was, then nod slowly. Nadia lets out a soft sigh of relief, and strokes my cheek affectionately.

NADIA: “Good. I couldn’t handle you turning from me, MC. It had to be done. I had no choice.”

Nadia already considers herself alone against the world. The MC is the closest thing she has to an ally; the MC is the closest thing she has to a confidant(e). Yet her anxieties and trust issues keep her from truly allowing MC to be as close as they are in her Upright route. This is seen as early as Book 9, when in the carriage ride (and immediately after discovering Portia’s betrayal), she wonders if MC will betray her, too, and whether she is destined to stand alone in the world.

Over the course of the 11 books from Book 9 to Book 20, she has come to realize that if she loses MC, she is truly, truly alone in the world. Thus, her hesitation (“slowly”) to reach for MC. Thus, her blatant relief in MC staying with her. Thus, her admission that she would be unable to handle MC turning away from her.

Part 2: Becoming the Devil

In any heroic story, the hero must achieve a seemingly impossible feat: saving the world; defeating the unstoppable Big Bad; et cetera. Tragic heroes also seek to achieve impossible feats, but their “feats” straddle the line between good and evil, or their reasons — why they want to achieve the impossible heroic feat — are not grounded in conventional morality. Tragic heroes attempt to achieve their impossible feats, but their efforts, whether successful or not, always have catastrophic consequences.

Hamlet’s impossible feat is to avenge his father: his efforts to do so result in the deaths of his (debatable) love interest, his mother, his step-father, his friends, and himself.

Solas in Dragon Age: Inquisition’s impossible feat was to stop the Evanuris: his efforts to do so created the Veil, stripping elves of their immortality and power, leaving them open to exploitation, enslavement, and death (and opening the way for him to undertake a second impossible feat: destroying the Veil to restore the elven people’s power).

Clarke Griffin in the TV show The 100 had the impossible feat of saving her people from having their bone marrow harvested by Mount Weather: her efforts to do so saved her people, but killed hundreds of innocent people who had nothing to do with the cruelties inflicted on Clarke’s friends; gave her and another major character PTSD; and led to Clarke’s self-imposed exile from her people.

Nadia’s impossible feat is to defeat the Devil Arcana.

Where in her Upright route she believes MC is powerful enough to bind the Devil’s powers, essentially limiting him to his own realm, in her Reversed route she does not believe this: she thinks it is too risky to MC’s safety, and she is unwilling to lose MC after they “nearly died binding Vlastomil.” Instead, she will replace the Devil Arcana herself, as it is the only way to guarantee that the Devil’s threat would end.

VALERIUS: “It’s a terrible idea [to replace the Devil Arcana]. You want to be trapped here, forever?”

NADIA: “I see no other option. The Devil cannot be allowed to continue his machinations.”

THE HIEROPHANT: “Interesting. I hold no love for the current Devil. He oversteps his bounds. ... Yes. I believe you’d make a lovely Arcana. At the very least, you’d mind your own business.”

The Hierophant tarot is all about tradition, convention, authority, “staying within your own bounds.” The Devil’s attempt to escape his realm and merge the magical and mortal realms certainly disrupts the accepted status quo. If Nadia replaces the Devil, then the status quo is maintained (“at the very least, you’d mind your own business”). Of course the Hierophant is going to encourage her to do this.

VALERIUS: “And give up your own humanity in exchange! I’ve been there, Countess, it’s no way to live.”

Nadia shakes her head, looking out the window to the vineyard beyond.

Nadia looking out the window the vineyard beyond is not only a description but symbolic of her own reasoning. Her attention is diverted by looking out the window, so she is not fully attentive to what Valerius is saying. She is unwilling to look at, and thus give attention to, those who disagree with her; she has turned her face away from reason and disagreement.

NADIA: “What choice do I have, really?”

MC: “There’s always a choice!”

NADIA: “Not this time, MC. You’ve been with me through it all... but this last thing I must do alone. I won’t risk you.”

MC then has the choice to say “I’m with you” or say “I won’t risk YOU!” here. I chose the latter option for thematic relevance: MC is panicking, now, fully understanding what Nadia intends to do — and fully understanding that they might lose Nadia forever. They are trying to undo the damage they have done in the earlier parts of the route, but it is too late. Nadia’s heart has hardened.

MC: “I won’t risk YOU!”

NADIA: “MC... That’s my duty. As Countess of Vesuvia, as Princess of Prakra... as your lover. I will do what no one else can. I will drag this world, kicking, screaming, and ungrateful, to safety.”

Again, Nadia is the only one who can do this. She will drag this world “kicking, screaming, and ungrateful, to safety” — she knows she will not be thanked, or praised, but it is necessary. It is for their own good. Nadia knows best, and Nadia can only trust herself to get things done.

MC: “We’re in this together, Nadia. I’m coming with you.”

NADIA: “You cannot follow me into the darkness, MC.”

(It should be noted that Kevin MacLeod’s “Wounded” is playing during this. This is the tragic piano that is also heard in Asra’s route on the Lazaret. I mention this because the tragic piano always fucks me up emotionally, so y’all have to suffer too.)

Nadia’s line — “You cannot follow me into the darkness” — is typical of a Tragic Hero who wishes to protect others, especially their love interest. Using my prior two examples from Dragon Age: Inquisition and The 100:

When a Lavellan Inquisitor who romanced Solas tells him, “let me help you, Solas,” Solas says: “I cannot do that to you, vhenan.”

When Bellamy Blake asks Clarke to stay at her home, instead of impose self-exile, Clarke says: “I bear it so they [her people] don’t have to.”

The point of these kinds of statements is this: This terrible undertaking is my responsibility alone; only I can accomplish this impossible feat; I do not want you to be hurt; I would rather something happen to me than you.

But where the Tragic Hero usually succeeds in isolating themself from their love interest, MC inverts this aspect of the archetype: they convince Nadia to let them accompany her to the Devil’s realm. If MC had told Nadia in earlier books, “I’d follow you anywhere,” this is truly an echo of that sentiment: MC is willing to go to Hell for Nadia Satrinava.

THE HIEROPHANT: “If you go down this path, you cannot hesitate. If you lose your nerve, he will come back. If you waver, he will see it. If you do this, you need to mean it.”

NADIA: “To keep the world safe. To keep MC safe... I’ll do anything. I won’t lose.”

It’s important to state Nadia does not want to become the Devil on her own merits. It’s not a power grab (at least, not consciously). She realizes it is dangerous. She genuinely sees no other option to end the Devil’s threat, and thus save the world, that does not risk harm to MC. As stated before, MC is the closest thing Nadia has to an ally: it makes sense she is unwilling to consider any options that have even the slightest chance of her losing MC. It makes sense that she is willing to do “anything” to keep MC safe.

She is constantly stating there is “no other choice,” even though the other characters (Valerius and the High Priestess) offer alternatives, namely binding the Devil in his own realm (what happens in the Upright end). It is not that she is not hearing these alternatives, or unwilling to listen to reason: it is that they are unacceptable to her, by virtue of the danger posed to MC. It is that [Solas voice] every alternative was worse. It is that [Solas voice] terrible choices are all that remain. If you have to kill Stranger A to save 100,000 lives, and someone offers Stranger B to kill instead of Stranger A, it is an unacceptable alternative.

An essential aspect of the Tragic Hero is colossal mistakes in judgement. In Nadia’s case, this would obviously be her decision to replace the Devil’s Arcana. But this has been reinforced to her over the course of 20 books through critical decisions made earlier in her route:

Not talking to Nadia’s sisters, which accomplishes two things: 1) reinforces to Nadia that you are on her side; 2) reinforces to Nadia that she is right to maintain her grudge against her sisters. Her first instinct is to resent her sisters. There is no challenge to Nadia to change her mind, or move past old hurts. She remains static, stubborn, and seeking to prove herself - not only to her sisters, but to herself.

Encouraging Nadia to cast out Portia, which reinforces to Nadia that she cannot trust, confide in, or believe others: she will always be betrayed. Nadia’s first instinct is to send Portia away. Agreeing with her reinforces that she is right to distrust everyone, and only believe in her own competence and ability. She remains static and closed off from others.

Encouraging Nadia to kill Lucio. Nadia’s first instinct is to kill him, as she sees “no other way”. MC agreeing with her reinforces to her that her decisions are best, and that sometimes there are no other choices, or at least [Solas voice] terrible choices are all that remain. She remains static and unchallenged in her viewpoint(s).

Part 2.1: Trusting Nadia

Nadia’s “betrayal” is framed as random, coming out of nowhere, and only for her own power. I was suspicious of this framing from the moment I saw it, because characters like Reversed Nadia — straddling the line between good and evil, isolated, pursuing their impossible feat — tend to place high priority on the people they love, to the point of over-protectiveness, obsession, and/or obsessive devotion. An excellent example would be Victor Fries/Dr. Freeze in the Batman comics, who is willing to commit evil acts in pursuance of his impossible feat to save his wife.

I never doubted Nadia’s love for MC, even in the reversed route. As stated before, Nadia thinks that MC is not like the others in her life, who are incompetent fools, or simpering power-seekers, or her detested sisters. They are unique. They are special. While she may not be able to trust them fully (again! everyone can betray her! she is the only one she can trust!), she certainly loves them for what they mean to her.

Working under the assumption that Nadia truly loves MC, then, following the precedents of other tragic characters who came before her, she would be utterly unwilling to allow any harm to come to MC. This would extend to her allegedly offering MC to the Devil without any remorse. I was more inclined to believe (even before I played the Reversed route) that it was some ruse of Nadia’s to trick the Devil.

And so imagine my surprise when Nadia and MC left the Hierophant’s realm to go to Nadia’s gate, and the book provided the following scene:

NADIA: “I have a plan, MC. Lucio failed to defeat the Devil. But that does not mean it cannot be done. Unfortunately... I cannot risk telling you. I need your reaction to be genuine. Will you be loyal to me, MC? Will you trust I want what’s best for you?”

MC: “Yes.”

NADIA: “Good. Everything that happens is for you, do you understand? Promise me you’ll remember I’ll always keep you safe.”

Boy, it would’ve been nice if someone mentioned this when discussing Nadia selling out MC!

This is such obvious foreshadowing of Nadia playing the long con it’s painful. She cannot tell MC her plan about how to deal with the Devil, because she needs MC’s reaction to be genuine; she needs MC to be surprised. If the Devil realizes he is being played, everything is over, and her efforts will have been for nothing.

For Nadia, the stakes are high. She either:

Tells her lover what her plan is, i.e. to use MC as a bargaining chip, which could have backfire in multiple ways: MC could be uncooperative, or MC could play their part unconvincingly to the Devil, and tip him off. She might stay with MC, but risk the world.

Or, she withholds it from MC, so that their surprise and shock (and, yes, feelings of betrayal) are genuine, and thus more convincing to the Devil. She loses MC, but saves the world.

Her decision is pragmatic: she will sacrifice MC, even if it means she loses MC’s love, for the greater good (saving the world). She understands that the healer has the bloodiest hands. She is accepting the blood to make things better. By choosing the second option, she is choosing to trust herself and her plan instead of trusting MC to pull off a successful deception. (In a similar vein: remember how much she enjoyed deceiving Valerius in Book 6, The Lovers.)

Still, she does not want to sacrifice MC, but sees no other way. It is painful, but for the greater good. Thus why she emphasizes why Her Decision Is Best, and In MC’s Best Interest: “Everything that happens is for you, do you understand? Promise me you’ll remember I’ll always keep you safe.”

You may be hurt, but it is for the greater good, don’t you understand? Don’t you trust me to do the right thing? Don’t you see that I have your best interests in mind? Don’t you see that you can trust me? That you should trust me?

She even goes so far as to test MC when MC promises her that they will know she’ll always keep MC safe. I call it a test, because that is what it undoubtedly is: she holds MC’s throat, and asks, “Even now?”

This is a lead-in for a premium scene, but it goes deeper than that. Implicitly, she is saying: Even when I have you so vulnerable, even with my hand around your throat, do you trust that I will keep you safe? Can I let myself believe you when you tell me that yes, you do trust me; that yes, you know I have your best interests at heart?

MC has the option of proving it to her (premium choice), or simply saying “yes”. I chose the latter. It is simple, and honest, and depending on people’s MCs, undoubtedly true. MC is willing to go to Hell at Nadia’s side; this is a minor thing, by comparison.

MC makes the interesting observation that Nadia looks at them “like a pet.” Sure, it could be a reference to Nadia’s obvious petplay kink, but I think it’s indicative of their deeper relationship: Nadia may love MC, but she does not consider them her true partner as she does in her Upright route. Again, she can only trust herself, no matter how important MC is to her, because MC, too, might end up disappointing her. They are lovers, and they are partners, but Nadia and MC are not equals (unlike in Upright). Nadia sees MC like a pet (to cherish, love, and care for, but not treat as equal) and I fully expect she will continue to do so in the next update.

Whether or not Nadia is aware that this isn’t the healthiest way to love someone is up in the air, but I’m inclined to believe that she is not aware, and she is demonstrating her love in the best way she knows how: protecting MC (which leads to making MC’s decisions for them), providing for them (which extends into petplay and spoiling), and praising them (you are special, you are unique, you are not like everyone else in my life, who disappoints me).

Later, approaching the Devil’s realm, she reminds MC of the conversation they had in her gate:

MC: “You have a plan. One you can’t tell me about.”

NADIA: “Yes. And I need you to trust me for it to work. Do you still trust me?”

MC: “I do.”

NADIA: “Good. Remember that when we’re in there.”

NADIA: “... I love you.”

(Edit March 22: Nadia’s sprite during her “I love you” line is her embarrassed/uncertain face. A subtle signal that she, too, has doubts, even if she’s trying to hide them.)

The whole point of the cliffhanger was to shock people, but I think that people who are saying that Nadia sold MC out for her own power are misguided. Nadia spent the entire book talking about how she had no choice but to do this and foreshadowing that she was going to do something that would be unpleasant but necessary. To say that Nadia sold MC to the Devil for her own power is to completely ignore everything that’s been set up throughout the book.

Also, if you still don’t trust her / consider her a bitch after I’ve gone through this whole section talking about how Reversed Nadia is a character type that would never let someone important to her (i.e., MC) come to harm (though she may use them for her own gains) and that it’s 99% likely she has no intention of actually following through on this “deal”... that says more about you than it does Nadia.

Part 2.2: The Dogs

The way the dogs were framed made me think that Nadia was straight up cruel to them. I thought the dogs were physically there, and Nadia was actually abusive to them (though I was inclined to believe it was neglect, not abuse. again, quibbling).

Considering Nadia’s treatment of the cheetah, and even the vampire leeches, I should not have taken these accounts at face value, because they are flat-out misleading (at best!).

For context, Nadia and MC have left Nadia’s Gate to go to the Devil’s realm. The Hierophant has just warned them of a perilous journey. They leave the Hierophant’s realm, go to Nadia’s Gate where they have the discussion about trust, and then enter the frozen forest background. What happens is the following:

MC: “Where are we?”

NADIA: “There are many roads connecting the realms. Lost paths in the dark. The forest is an illusion. It is likely our minds cannot comprehend the true shape of these spaces. Instead, the world changes into metaphors we can understand. But you must remember they are only metaphors, MC. Keep your wits about you.”

We continue walking, wary of every strange noise that flickers off the narrow path we follow. Every step we take causes more fog to swirl from the ground, until we can barely see in front of us once more. I hear a snarl behind us, close enough that I can feel the breath. Without thinking, I turn around to face it —

Two figures emerge from the fog, their mouths dripping red. Mercedes and Melchior. Everywhere the blood from their mouths drips onto the ground, a cluster of flowers sprout. When I look closer, I realize... they’re all poisonous.

NADIA: “They must have gone mad with Lucio’s death.”

She tugs me closer behind her, but the dogs don’t try to approach. They just haunt our steps like specters, snarling and howling.

(Edit March 22: I just realized Nadia tugs MC closer behind her after seeing the dogs. She’s putting herself between MC and perceived danger, i.e. the dogs, further reinforcing her fear of losing MC and determination to protect them against anything. But sure, she doesn’t care about MC at all and is only using them for her own power.)

None of the posts I saw discussing Nadia’s treatment of the dogs ever mentioned that this happens in the magical realms, or that Nadia and MC discuss the forest’s visions being metaphorical immediately before the dogs’ appearance. Which is a shame, because it completely removes any context of the scene and does the double whammy of demonizing Nadia.

I guess it’s easier and faster to type out “Nadia abused Mercedes and Melchior!” over “The magical forest in the Arcana realms manifested a bloody Mercedes and Melchior [whose sprites are their pomegranate juice sprites with a little bit of blood added] as a metaphor for the line that Nadia has crossed, i.e. killing Lucio, and the possible guilt that she is either not feeling at all or is feeling and is simply pushing away so she will not have to acknowledge it.”

But the dogs’ mere presence — they follow always at a distance, like ghosts — is enough to force her to recognize it. She remarks that they must have gone mad, and moves on. She has come too far now to doubt herself. If she looks back, if she doubts herself, she is lost, and everything will have been for naught.

Part 2.3: The High Priestess

Leaving the icy forest, Nadia and MC come upon an old pavilion, where the High Priestess and Chandra await them. MC notes that “the dogs wait [behind us], never coming closer.” Further evidence that the dogs are metaphorical visions, not actually Mercedes & Melchior.

THE HIGH PRIESTESS: “You’ve strayed far from the path, child.”

NADIA: “High Priestess. What are you doing here?”

THE HIGH PRIESTESS: “I was calling to you. Did you not hear?”

NADIA: “I have been quite busy, High Priestess. I did not have time to answer.”

Nadia’s personal card is The High Priestess. Reversed, the High Priestess means one is ignoring their own intuition and/or subconscious, to their detriment. In Asra’s Book X, Nadia states that her intuition is more like a curse than a gift, which certainly echoes here in the meaning of the High Priestess, Reversed: “Perhaps you doubt yourself or feel silly or guilty for listening to your intuition, and as a result, you deny your ability to tune in and receive this potent information.”

This conversation also echoes Judgement, Reversed: “The Judgement reversed often appears when the Universe is trying to send you a message and invite you to something bigger, but you’re not listening. You are doing your best to pretend you didn’t receive it and are [...] hoping it will go away.”

The conversation continues:

THE HIGH PRIESTESS: “And so I come to you. These are words you cannot ignore. If you continue down this path, Nadia, all will be lost to you. Your family. Your intuition. Your humanity.”

NADIA: “If I do nothing, I will lose it just the same.”

THE HIGH PRIESTESS: “You know there is another option. You can bind the Devil instead.”

NADIA: “What, and lose MC instead? Slap the Devil on the wrist and throw him in jail? He’ll break free eventually. What’s a thousand years to an immortal being? This is the only way. The only permanent way.”

Note she corrects herself: the only permanent way. She understands there are other alternatives, but hers is best. When the High Priestess offers a solution, binding the Devil, Nadia angrily rejects it because of the risk it poses to MC, and she is unwilling to lose MC again.

It’s important to note that, within the course of a few hours:

Nadia went with MC to confront Lucio in the in-between realms, only to watch (helplessly! a thing she detests!) as Lucio stole MC’s body. (The Devil)

Nadia woke up without MC beside her in her Contemplation Tower, not knowing what Lucio had done or what had happened to MC until she went to the ballroom. (The Devil / The Tower).

Nadia had to send MC to the magical realms for their own protection, alone, where she could not protect them or ensure their welfare (The Tower).

Nadia watched MC struggle to unbind Vlastomil, suffering in the process. MC passes out, and reversed Nadia states that MC “almost died” unbinding Vlastomil (The Moon).

That is four experiences of Nadia being unwillingly parted from MC, either through separation or through a near death experience. That is why she refused to let MC go through the maze alone in The Star. That is why she is so set on not risking MC once again with the plan to bind the Devil. The scene continues:

THE HIGH PRIESTESS: “In a thousand years there will be another like you to step up again. Why must you do everything yourself? Why must you alone fight this threat?”

NADIA: “Because I am the only one I can trust.”

Nadia turns away, anger flashing in her eyes.

NADIA: “You have wasted your time in coming here, High Priestess.”

me 24 hours ago, blissfully unaware of this conversation: mc has spent 20 chapters reinforcing that nadia is the only one nadia can trust me now: wow i hate being right :(

An essential component of the Tragic Hero’s cycle is the hero’s isolation: disgusted by or despairing of the hero’s choices, their family, friends, and allies abandon them, or the hero themself abandons their family, friends, and allies to self-isolate. In Nadia’s case, it is both. She rejects the High Priestess’s wisdom, confident in her own choices (or, at least, unwilling to show the High Priestess that she is anything but 100% confident). In doing so, she pushes the High Priestess away.

And then there’s Chandra, who lands on Nadia’s shoulder and “nips at her ear sadly.” (The tragic piano is still going strong in the background!) The High Priestess, seeing this, says that Chandra “mourns [Nadia’s] loss already.” MC notes that Nadia “swallows hard, stroking Chandra’s neck gently,” and then the following exchange happens:

NADIA: “Must I lose you too, Chandra?”

The owl chirps and flies off her shoulder, going to land next to the High Priestess instead.

NADIA: “... I see. You will come around in time. You will see how necessary this is. Until then... goodbye, my friends.”

Like the dogs, I’m inclined to believe that Chandra is a metaphor, and not the actual owl. Chandra has been with Nadia since her childhood; she is the only thing Nadia took with her, from Prakra to Vesuvia. Chandra abandoning her is another metaphor for how far Nadia has fallen: she is utterly separated from who she once was. She is now, completely, a new person, unrecognizable to her closest and longest friend.

NADIA: “I know I’m right. I know this is the only path to victory... So why won’t anyone listen to me? It feels like I’m speaking to a wall. Do they think me foolish? I’ve considered every possibility. I’ve examined every other avenue. This is the only course of action left. They think I cannot do this. They think me incompetent.”

This is after Nadia leaves the High Priestess, and before the Hierophant informs them that Valdemar and Vulgora are attacking the palace. Note the progression of her thoughts: frustration and certainty in her own decision; questioning why other people think her choice is the wrong one; re-affirming her certainty; assuming that people who do not support her plan are like that not because of any concern for her welfare, but because they doubt her capabilities. I know I am right, but no one listens to me; thus, they are not truly concerned for me — they only think I cannot do this.

Implicitly, her thoughts that follow: Well, I am going to prove them wrong.

MC can either tell Nadia that they listen to her (to which Nadia praises MC, once again: You are special; you have always been by my side; I know I can trust you, unlike everyone else in the world), or that people who don’t listen are foolish. If the latter, Nadia agrees, saying that people who don’t listen to her end up not doing well, and cites Lucio as an example.

In either case, the exchange reinforces Nadia’s mindset, which has been shown through Nadia’s small vent: She feels as if no one is listening to her, and she is stubbornly convinced that her choice is the best one. She is frustrated that her friends and allies have turned against her, and she does not understand why, because clearly Her Choice Is Best.

If MC says they are listening, it reinforces that MC is the only one Nadia can keep close (as close as she can allow; trust no one but yourself, after all, is her modus operandi). If MC says the others are the foolish ones, it reinforces that Nadia is Always Right, because when people don’t listen to Nadia, they end up going astray or being worse-off, which just feeds into the cycle of Nadia is Right >> People Who Don’t Listen To Her Are Wrong >> Those People Suffer or Fail >> Thus Proving Nadia Right.

Part 3: Her Sisters

For me, this was easily the most heartbreaking aspect of the book. Nadia leaves the High Priestess angry, and she and MC arrive in a vision of Lucio’s wing. Nadia remains unswayed, telling MC they must keep going (if she looks back, if she falters, she is lost!), but MC, if selecting “I think this is real,” convinces Nadia to go to the ballroom, because Nadia wonders about why her sisters and guards are not stopping the chaos. (Implied in this statement: Why are they incompetent? Why are they useless? Why does everything fall apart without me?) The music is played sped up and backwards, symbolic of how wrong things are without Nadia’s presence.

In the ballroom, MC and Nadia find Natiqa, Nasmira, and Nahara attempting to get the crowds to safety, but the crowd isn’t listening to the Satrinavas. Then Nafizah sees MC and Nadia, and the following absolutely gut-wrenching exchange occurs:

Suddenly Nafizah, who is standing off to the side of her sisters, turns her head and looks straight at us.

NAFIZAH: “Like looking through a mirror into the fog... Why are you so far from us, sister mine?”

NADIA: “You can see us? Of course you can. Why should I be surprised?”

NAFIZAH: “The others need you here. They flounder without your guidance.”

NADIA: “Need me? NEED ME?”

Nadia’s sprite when she says “Need me? NEED ME?” is not an angry sprite. It’s her laughing sprite. You can just hear the angry disbelief. NEED ME? What are you talking about? Immediately with her next line, her sprite transitions into anger.

NADIA: “Since when have any of you needed me for anything? Perfect Nafizah, always looking down your nose at me. All of you did!”

NAFIZAH: “We have only ever loved you, Nadia. As much as you have allowed. The people are in a panic. They will not listen to us. They do not respect us. You must return.”

NADIA: “I will not! All my life, none of you have ever listened to me! You always thought you knew best! I’m doing what has to be done. If I returned, it would give the true villain time to escape. I’m striking now. You will see. And don’t you dare die before I’ve proven myself.”

And don’t you dare die before I’ve proven myself. Holy shit. Cold, but understandable, when taken into the context surrounding Nadia’s relationship with her sisters.

The youngest of seven, Nadia has always felt inadequate to the rest of her sisters. That is clear even in the early route, when she worries that Nasmira will take MC away from her. She is obsessed with proving herself to her sisters. It’s why she married Lucio, to prove to her sisters that she could pull Vesuvia up by its bootstraps. Reversed, that obsession is maintained, and she has no reason to change because MC does not challenge her.

When asking for her sisters for help in Book XIII Death, she blames the servants for the Masquerade troubles: “I have everything under control, of course. But the servants, they’ve made a mess of things.” It is not her fault that the Masquerade is not ready, it is the servants’; she has everything under control, she is perfectly adequate at hosting a party on such a grand scale. Do not blame me for these failures, sisters, blame others, it is they who are incompetent and untrustworthy, not me.

Now we have even more context for Nadia’s choice to replace the Devil. Not only does Nadia feel the need to achieve her impossible feat — defeating the Devil — for the sake of saving the world and her lover, but as the ultimate way to prove herself to her sisters. They can never consider her a vulnerable baby sister to be coddled and over-protected if she literally defeats the actual Devil.

In her Reversed route, she is still pressured to show both her sisters and herself that she is not the “baby” of the family, which she resents (see the bonus scene about Nadia’s birthday). Considering Nadia is the oldest of the cast, this is obviously a deep, deep wound that stretches back decades, if not her entire life. And MC’s choices did nothing to heal that wound, only keep it open.

Part 4: Wrap Up

Nadia in her Reversed route is a textbook tragic hero. She is a character of royalty (fulfilling antiquity’s requirement that tragic heroes be noble of some sort, because nobility’s fall is always more tragic than a commoner’s); she seeks to accomplish an impossible feat; she isolates herself from her allies, friends, and family; she has a fatal flaw, which is her hubris, aka her conviction that she is in the right no matter what. We have had 20 books of buildup leading to this: the climax of her negative character development. All that remains is the denouement (aka, defeating and replacing the Devil.)

I have every expectation that she will succeed in her impossible feat, but the consequences will be catastrophic. Perhaps she will have to (however unwillingly) isolate herself from MC forever. MC might even become the Fool Arcana to join her, but that is no guarantee that they could actually be together. The Arcana are meant to stay in their separate realms, after all.

The devs promised a bittersweet ending, or a tragic romance. Nadia’s route fulfills both, because the ending is focused on MC and their relationship to their LI, not necessarily the reader’s favorite character, which may hypothetically be a relatively minor antagonist relative to the rest of the route.

Part 5: Last Thoughts

thanks for coming to my ted talk

#nadia satrinava #the arcana #my meta #the arcana spoilers #if u liked this pls reblog i worked v hard umu

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