#she can't go on any longer

[grahamcarmen]

carmen's team red seeing carmen being upset that she doesn't get to be with gray

[blackswallowtailbutterfly]

Still haven't messaged my mom back. And I don't think I'm going to.

[supercantaloupe]

what’s a fun fact about you that people may not guess

i am not anyone's idea of athletic. however since my social circle is like 90% other honors student orchestra losers, i technically qualify as a jock given that i have six years of experience playing field hockey

[calamitoustide]

there's no fucking way i got a 94% on my final public speaking speech

[deadrlngers]

ahem ahem......dark urge......

[anthromimicry]

just thinking about how many 'lives' misao lived throughout the years and as a result, how many people could potentially be wondering what happened to her, because she affected their own lives in one way or another. like in one of these previous lives, she worked as a orchardist for this wealthy family whom would open up their apple orchard in late august to the public and close it in november. so as you can imagine, misao had to uhh. Kill a lot of people within a short amount of time.

and because this wealthy family provided her with housing + a paycheck in exchange for taking care of the orchard year-round, she would literally 'stock up' on what she needed for months ahead within it as horrible as that sounds. and everything was okay for a while, as the family mostly kept their distance from the orchard since they trusted misao to take care of it. BUT they made an unexpected visit one day and discovered all of the terrible things misao stored in her fridge. + yeah... that marked the end of her time as a orchardist with this family.

but the thing is that she had this repeated customer during the time the apple orchard was open to the public who like liked her. and he wanted to properly court her. BUT by the time he tried to do so, she had disappeared without a trace from the place. and just a few weeks later, that wealthy families bodies were found washed ashore a lake a couple of miles away.

and this begs the question whether this guy is still wondering what happened to her + whether she had anything to do with what happened to the couple. but this is only one example of how misao has unintentionally left little 'breadcrumbs' of her continued existence around the world, so there's got to be more than just that man who remembers her and that's like. DAMN... misao really has messed up a lot of people's lives AHHH and she is certainly not as sneaky as she believes she is sometimes

[qqqqqqqqqqq0]

i've been having some trouble falling asleep lately

[piplupod]

mistakes were made. should not have gone to library today. i will be leaving the house all five days of the week now (plus we went to a waterside on sunday for several hours) and uhm... i feel like i need to go hibernate for several weeks to feel even remotely okay again fhdkdl i am so tired i can barely think enough to string words together in any comprehendable way 🧍<- upset

[mothbaaalls]

lutf thoughts:

1. nagi haunting the narrative is legitimately going to fucking kill me i will not survive the winter

2. AN NEEDS THERAPY IMMEDIATELY, POSTHASTE, PRONTO, HOP TO IT, CHOP CHOP. i cant imagine what that fucking feels like??? i Cannot fucking imagine learning that your family and EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND LOVE has been deliberately fucking lying to you for three years. (taiga needs to pay for at least half of it for that bullshit he pulled. there's a way to break the news and that is not the fucking way to do it you GODDAMN IDIOT)

3. i threatened to stab taiga with a knife (out loud)

4. I GOT JUMPSCARED BY CAUCASIAN DESTINATION BECAUSE I FORGOT IT WAS IN THIS FUCKING EVENT

[bunnihearted]

🖤👻🏰🩹

[oldtvandcomics]

You know, I think we had enough subversions of the “power of love means romantic love” trope that consists of the protagonists spending the whole story looking for romantic love in vain, only to be saved last second by a very helpless feeling friend/sibling/other loved one. I want a story where the prophet or whoever starts talking about True Love and Finding Your Prince Charming, and the heroine just deadass looks them in the eye and goes.

“I’m queer.”

“Oh... Well, that’s great! Progressive fairy tale! It doesn’t have to be a prince! Could be a princess!”

“No. Not a lesbian. I’m aromantic. Fuck you.”

[lausticzt]

I wish laura could let herself be loved but it happened once (1) that someone almost accepted her for who she was ( he also wanted her to stop her ambitions in settlement of a peaceful life with the best intents ; but was so insistent on keeping her safe and them running off for his version of a happy life ) flaws and all that man had to suffer through her antics for many years before his confession. After his death (she was so, so useless to do anything ; and that failure was one of the things that destroyed her spark), she really shut out everything.

all the men in the interior care about her family name and looks (she is so pretty ... only when placid) , and god do they always get so, physically close to her that she just stares into the distance. the amount of times she had to wait for them to get their arms off her and only once they're leaving does she look at them with ferocity in her veins. at a young age she was paraded around by her mother, and marriage was humoured at her from men twice her age ; which her mother delighted on. they were all sick.

she found so many familial bonds in the survey corp and that had meant, everything to her. that was where her true peace was ; even with all the death, the loss of those very people,, the endless fighting and endless gore --- she would say that was her happy life.

complements are wasted on her. her love is unconventional. face her bullshit head on. don't treat her differently , don't put up with her front -- she will show loyalty to individual people, never a cause. but you put up with her for so long and vice versa, she will run to you when you're hurt, barge through the door and the look of panic is something never before seen - she will have to stop herself immediately because (...) what was she doing. traumatic shit goes down? she's keeps looking at you from a distance and god, she's not the best person for it, but she will check on you, albeit, there's so much confliction on her expression because she's not great at it -- but she knows she wants to be there, so bare with her.

but after all that crap, you know if she did love someone, and she could admit that to herself ; it's a freeing feeling. it doesn't matter to say it, or have it known to the other person, but if it passes through that barrier, all she feels she can do for you is watch your back, and make sure you don't die or get hurt. she won't deny it. it will take years and years before she can come to that point ; but fuck, she's holds herself so differently. it is also so true in her platonic bonds she has to go through this entire process so many times jkfdh

[thedreadvampy]

the desperate urge to compliment someone online I think is super gorgeous and absolute Butch Goals Vs the utter terror of coming across creepy or making them feel surveilled or voyeured about: FIGHT

[feedingicetothedog]

i'm trying to formulate a post about my prediction for the claudia and louis dynamic in europe and all i can think of is that line from ep 5 where louis says that her absence laid bare who they were without her, a simmering pot of resentments. but instead of her (claudia) it's him (lestat)

[emometalhead]

.

[gottagobuycheese]

there’s got to be a faster way to play this game but How