#she can definitely be a bit offensive (see lesbian comment) but at least you know you can challenge her on it without it being a hate crime | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

rwbyconversations · 4 years

Text

The Scarlet Letter: Let’s talk about RWBY’s male LGBT rep

I have been sitting on this post for nearly four weeks waiting until the 15th due to the Before the Dawn spoiler rules.

So let's start with a blunt statement: RWBY's male LGBT representation has not been good. If the series' handling of female LGBT rep is good (which... well there's worse shows) and the general standard for how you write LGBT characters in a show like this, its handling of male rep has been... how not to. And Before the Dawn kinda solidified the idea in my head that the show's handling of its male LGBT cast just isn't good enough, either by the standards of when RWBY began in 2013, or today in 2020 when compatively massive steps have been taken over the past decade to show a more diverse list of characters... or at least a more diverse list of female characters.

I don't wanna make this a pissing match over how over-or-under-represented male or female LGBT characters are, but I feel like it's safe to say that the majority of the trend-setters for modern romances, especially in western animation, have been between women. Korra and Asami from Korra, Chloe and Max from Life is Strange, Marceline and Bubblegum in Adventure Time, (insert the relevant Steven Universe characters here, never watched it), and more recently, Adora and Catra in She-Ra and Luz in Owl House.

Compatively, while studies have shown that in general male LGBT characters get more appearances on a purely numerical level, in general they're more one-off characters there to pad a roster, or played more for comedy (see Josh Gad in the Beauty and the Beast remake or the gay guy in Avengers Endgame that was more notable for how hard China and Russia snapped him out of existance). The only big male-LGBT focused media I can think of from the last decade would be Yuri On Ice, Moonlight, IDW's Transformers: More Than Meets The Eye (Chromedome/Rewind best pairing fuck you Roberts for issue 16) Love Simon, and the anime adaptation of Banana Fish.

So it's no surprise that RWBY basically follows these ideas. It's big romance is (unless the writers are very stupid) going to be between Blake and Yang, their first out character was Ilia, Coco got sent to the Book Dimension where she confirmed "I use my sunglasses to perv on women without their knowledge" which uh... yeah you can definitely tell RWBY is written by men... and Volume 6 had Saph and Terra being a good example of an LGBT couple without any real drama. In the last three years alone, the show has drastically increased its lesbian and bisexual characters, alongside even including its first out trans character in May Marigold (albeit only revealed on Twitter). In general, these depictions of sexuality have been pretty OK. Would have liked it if Ilia wasn't immediately written out of the show after Volume 5 as it made her feel a bit more disposable than intended but whatever, subject for another day.

RWBY's male rep though is a bit spottier. There's the plant bois in Volume 5's premiere, we nearly had Pilot Boi until some last-minute revisions, and... Scarlet.

Why Scarlet's a bad launchpad for male LGBT rep

I don't like Scarlet or how his sexuality has been handled. Scarlet's homosexuality wasn't revealed in the show, or by the writers, or even in anything that's actually canon. He's confirmed gay in his sole of dialogue in a non-canon fan anthology, where the manga's Twitter team had to say that Miles suggested the idea and approved of it.

In short, Scarlet is Dumbledore'd, where his sexuality is revealed in out-of-show material and in a way that doesn't make it supremely obvious (Miles himself never commented to confirm this so this news was limited in how far it could spread. I'm genuinely curious how many people still don't know Scarlet's gay), and Scarlet himself is a nothing character who was written out of the show after Volume 3 and only reappeared in Before The Dawn, half a decade after he vanished. Compared to Ilia, as this came out after Ilia's entire arc in Volume 5, it's not a great starting point for mlm rep. But things would have been forgiven if it had gotten better, if the show did have more male LGBT characters introduced, even just on the Saphron/Terra level of just being around for a few episodes before leaving. Then it would have been a misfire but then we could all say "Things got better."

It... didn't. Which is why when Before the Dawn released in 2020, a full two years after Scarlet was first confirmed gay, while the franchise had more than doubled its wlw rep, Scarlet remained the one male character in the entire franchise who had a name and liked men. I remember vividly a fake leak for After The Fall which claimed Yatsuhashi would come out to Velvet and admit to having a crush on Fox. And I remember as well how many people were disappointed when it was said to be false, because it would have been nice for Yatsuhashi's character, especially after the fleshing out he gets in the CFVY books. If Yatsu had come out as gay in the books I'd like his writing enough to say he's a good case for rep, albeit with the caveat of "This is all in side material." But in reality, the leak was fake and Coco was confirmed gay instead.

Unfortunately, Before the Dawn proceeded to ruin Scarlet and made me at times feel genuinely uncomfortable as a queer man! Let's talk about that.

Before The Dawn is crap and Scarlet's writing is borderline offensive

I hate Before the Dawn. It's... bad. I read it while on a vacation and the only solace I had about the entire thing was that I'd bought an M&M chocolate bar. The bar was finished before the book. That bummed me out. It's not a very well written book, the prose is very Early 2010s YA Writer, none of the characters are memorable and there's various Fun Incidents like "NGDO using children as bait for Grimm," and "Neptune's hydrophpobia being used as a threat to torture him and the scene is played for comedy."

Theo was cool. I can't wait to see him as written by good writers, he should be a highlight of the Vacuo arc.

I had two hopes for Before the Dawn- "Don't be bad," and "Let Scarlet and Sage be well written." I'd liked how After The Fall had handled some of its characters (barring, y'know, Coco perving on women), especially Fox and Yatsu who were surprising in how much I liked them. I was looking forward to seeing Myers give Sage and Scarlet similar treatment- two relatively nothing characters meant he'd have a blank slate to write them however he wanted, he could give them unique personalties and if nothing else it could be cool to see their Semblances.

And then I read the book. (Sage fans I am so sorry for you, you got baited harder than Johnlock fans)

Scarlet's a giant dickhead in the book. It's his sole character trait and his inner monologues go on, and on, and on about how much he hates Sun, how he revels in mocking him. Most of his dialogue is sarcastic put-downs about Sun and how lame he is, and Sun is never properly allowed to defend himself or point out how going with Blake meant he was able to help save Haven Academy.

(hey remember when Sun in Volume 6 expressly says to Blake "I was a bad leader for ditching Neptune and the others, and I need to work on that" only for Before the Dawn to have him staunchly refuse to accept that he let the team down? I don't think Myers did but I do)

Scarlet being a ratty bitch would be one thing if, again, the franchise had done more rep. He'd still be a badly written character, but it wouldn't sting as much. But because Scarlet is still the only expressly confirmed male LGBT character in canon (the book teases that Nolan is gay but there's never confirmation either way beyond him smiling at Scarlet), it means that he has to represent that entire ideal. So when the one gay man in Remnant is being an asshole and a snide loser, that means that by extension, this is how the franchise sees gay men. And that fucking sucks! I wanted to come out of Before The Dawn singing its praises, I wanted to like the book, but it was a massive letdown, especially coming off of the other big 2020 RWBY controversy involving gay characters.

Yeah. We're doing this.

Clover and Fair Game: Technically not queerbaiting. BUT:

Let's pre-empt this: Clover wasn't queerbaiting, and Fair Game, while cool and I dig it, kudos to them for becoming one of the top 5 RWBY pairings on AO3 in one year that's fucking impressive (I say with mild malice as an IronQrow main), never had a chance. The writing never seriously boosted it barring one interaction which was flirty (them talking in the lobby of the Schnee Manor), and everything else was out of show boosting through the social media teams and CRWBY hyping it themselves by saying they liked it. If you wanna blame people, blame the animators who went off-script with stuff like Kim Newman adding the wink as a deliberate nod to the Volume 4 waitress, or the social media team deliberately using the same policies for Fair Game as they do for Renora and Bumblebee.

It wasn't Eddy's fault that things escalated, and he himself has said that in retrospect, he should have warned people that this never had a shot.

But I can't blame the Fair Game fanbase. Because Fair Game took off like wildfire. It came right as the fanbase began seriously asking for more male rep, Qrow's pretty hot, and the Clover wink came right after the Great IronQrow Reawakening of November 9th, 2019. The rocket was primed, and they rode it to the moon. Finally, to these people, after seven years RWBY seemed to be doing something with mlm rep in show. People started getting into RWBY just for Clover and Qrow's interactions. And if heroes were boring, Watts and Tyrian also had a fantastic dynamic that made Nuts and Volts one of the more popular villain ships overnight. Things seemed to be turning around! RWBY was remembering that gay men existed! You could hear the choir sing!

... And for those people, that meant that episode 12 hit like Truck-Kun.

People got pissed. People were horrified. And it didn't help that some members of CRWBY had said in the build-up that episode 12 would have some shots that made them nauseous (probably the Tyrian thumb thing) Out of context, it looked to these fans like CRWBY were basically laughing at their suffering, like they were saying "Lol, you thought you had a chance, get fucked, I hope your vomit burns on the way up."

Yeah, Fair Game was never gonna be canon, and I think some people ran too far with it. But in the wider context of how desperate RWBY's mlm community had gotten for basic crumbs of content? I can see why they'd run with what they had. The writers aren't at fault for what happened, but CRWBY didn't help matters. And that desperate mix of what felt like official backing from the crew, jokes about how cute the ship was, and the hope that finally the show would have onscreen rep? I can see why people ran with it.

So why is the show more lackluster in depicting mlm characters?

Money. Let's be honest, most RWBY fans don't care if the show doesn't have good male rep. I'm willing to bet some of you reading this won't care and just dismiss it as not being that big a problem. I don't think the writers care if the show doesn't have good mlm rep because they're not poaching that market. They're after what they see as a bigger, more lucrative market, which in this case is female LGBT rep. That gets people buying games, watching shows, raising awareness and boosting awareness of your property, which means you make more money. In short: Two women kissing hits more markets and generates more attention than two men.

Am I saying that Miles, Monty and Kerry deliberately sat down seven years ago and said "We're not doing gay men because it won't generate enough ad revenue and traffic to be worth the loss in revenue from homophobes?" No, that's silly. But I'm saying that it's less important for them, and it shows in the things that are small and add up. Things like Miles not verifying Scarlet's sexuality or retweeting the manga account's confirmation to spread the message (compared to how he enthusiastically confirmed Ilia being a lesbian himself during the Reddit AMA). It shows in how Pilot Boi would have been the first mlm character only to die in his second full episode until M&K were told about the Bury Your Gays trope. It shows in how Shannon believes that Ozma is "megaqueer" and Miles jokingly laughs it off instead of confirming it, leaving it to just be Shannon's headcanon. It shows in how actor shipping is compared between the mlm and wlw ships, where Arryn and Barbara's frequent pushes for Bumblebee are seen as "official confirmation that it's endgame" while Michael and Kerry saying they enjoy Seamonkeys is treated as "well it would be cute if they did it, but they're never going to."

I'm not gonna say anything like "CRWBY are gonna have Qrow end up with a woman like Robyn out of spite against the bad apples of the Fair Game crowd." I'm not gonna say that I don't think CRWBY cares about male representation in the series. It is, however, definitely a low priority for them, and because that leads to gaffes like Scarlet's writing in Before The Dawn being offensive in his depiction, it only makes the contrast between the sexes all the more painfully apparent.

I'm kinda tired of waiting for Rooster Teeth to show that they do care about mlm. I'm kinda tired of RWBY's male rep being written like it came from a 1993 time capsule where I have to enhance the screen to see a guy holding a sign of Sun's abs or be content with the only onscreen rep still being the plant bois in Volume 5. I'm tired of how often the crew dances around answering basic questions about sexuality (and age, and birthdays, and heights, and so on) by treating it as a spoiler question, as if just wanting to know what way people swing would ever be a spoiler. I'm just... tired of all this. When the best mlm rep in Rooster Teeth's history remains the two dads in Camp Camp who show up in a few episodes, that should say something really bad about your company and your biases (To say nothing of the recent Red vs Blue seasons and their blatant queerbaiting for Grif and Simmons and the whole can of worms that is Donut).

I'd like to not feel like I'm borderline unwelcome because I'd like to see two men in this show kiss, and that the sole thing that represents people like me in this show is some British twat who complains about sand.

I'd just like to feel like my sexuality isn't a joke to Rooster Teeth (or at the very least, be like Donut and have it be a funny one). But at this point after the last few years? I feel like a very uncomfortable punchline to them. And it just sucks.

#rwby #rwde #fair game #queerbaiting #rwby before the dawn #mlm #lgbt #rwby analysis #Rooster Teeth #clover ebi #scarlet david

97 notes · View notes

whookami · 3 years

Text

About Stobin

An asexual’s limited experience in what romance and relationships are actually about and how she totally put her foot in her mouth and probably offended an entire demographic unintentionally, but was also super aggressive about it?

Whoops. I done fucked up.

So, no denying it. I made a post yesterday in which I argued in bad faith about the entire topic of Stobin, and why shipping them without a sexual component shouldn’t receive the amount of hate it does.

First and foremost: I’m in no way an authority on sex and sexuality and sexual identity. In fact, I’m probably the least qualified person to talk about it. I’m asexual. I’m actively repulsed by most physical contact, and I’m pretty content 90% of the time with my permanent singlehood.

But! At times I see relationships, and I envy them. I want them. I want that connection that two people feel so deeply that makes them choose each other above anyone else in the world. The problem is that when I see this take the form of a romantic relationship, let’s say Jancy for instance, I can’t relate. I don’t want that. I don’t want the touching and kissing and all of that stuff. I see something like Steve and Robin, who have a dynamic I envy without any physical component, and to me that is the ultimate perfect ideal. I want to grow old with someone like that.

But this ignores and invalidates Robin’s sexuality, and in a comment I received and replied to, it mentions that my take reduced the identifier of Lesbian as being limited to a sexual concept, when it means more. And I replied that I understood and agreed. But after a few hours of sitting with this, I realized, I don’t really understand. Like, at all. To me, labels like Gay or Lesbian did, in my mind, indicate a sexual identity, but not an emotional one. In my head I’d always divorced the concept of physical attraction and emotional attraction as two separate pieces, but with a certain amount of overlap, as this is true of my personal experiences. I can experience aesthetic attraction, and desire an emotional connection with other people that is, maybe?, on par with romantic attraction. I’m honestly not even sure. But I’d always internalized these pieces as being very separate and not limited or affected by gender.

But like, I can’t pretend like I understand how these different pieces line up, or feel, or affect each other in allosexual people. I mean, I said I understood, and I grasp it a bit, but, most of that understanding comes from the media I’ve watched in my life, and so much of that expressed love and romance from an exclusively patriarcial heteronormative perspective. What the hell do I actually know about how women view sex, and how lesbians view themselves and their identities? Even though I’m afab, my own sexuality has largely separated me from how most women experience themselves, their bodies, their awareness of their own sexuality, and how that affects their behaviour. It’s kind of weird to realize just how little I understand this thing that is just so innate to other people.

That doesn’t give me a pass to be an ass about it, though. My post yesterday was assholish. I did get rid of that piece, but I kept myself a copy as a reminder. I’m honestly embarassed now. I don’t have an excuse. I am cringing at myself right now. I said something truly stupid about not being allowed to view Stobin as romantically possible is somehow (how??? How, Courtney?? You did a shit job explaining this part and today, only a day later, I don’t even know what the heck I was trying to say!) denying my sexual identity or some vague shit like that. I seriously do not know what I meant. I do know I was angry because over messenger I’d been talking with a friend about fanfic and mentioned I was writing one in which Steve and Robin are in an arranged marriage, and while it is sexless, Steve is incredibly happy and Robin is caught feeling guilty and unhappy and a bunch of things because she cares about Steve and doesn’t want to hurt him and lie to him and blah blah blah, not important. Anyways, she called me disgusting and that I should give up writing for all time. Which, okay, hurt. I was angry and upset and for whatever reason it lead to that awful rant, and just… fuck. I was such a piece of shit. I really was. I’m mad at myself for having such a knee jerk reaction and saying a bunch of garbage, it was a pathetic attempt to make my feelings seem more valid, or like I was somehow the offended party.

Let me be perfectly clear: I wasn’t. Of course I wasn’t. My friend was harsh and could’ve definitely spoken with me about the issue in a better manner, but I’m the one who went off and made a private disatisfaction into this rant in which I tried to speak with authority about something I have no right to pretend like I understand.

I’m really sorry. It was offensive and filled with a bunch of terrible ideas and poisonous concepts and just an unfair anger that I am ashamed of in hindsight. I used terrible arguments to try and make my own feelings seem more valid, because I didn’t want to feel wrong or bad for how my take on them as an ‘ideal’ relationship ignores a huge part of their identities, and in Robin’s case that identity means an awful lot to so many people who have long been either unrepresented, underrepresented, or poorly represented. And I go opening my big fucking mouth and just stick my entire leg in there.

So yeah, that was shitty of me and I’m gonna try to do better. It’s not gonna be perfect, but like, I can just keep trying and keep listening when people who actually do know what they’re talking about have something to say to me about it.

#robin buckley #I fucked up and I’m sorry

4 notes · View notes

curtashiism · 4 years

Text

Some reflections on autism, femininity, and my nonbinary identity

So... I grew up in a conservative city. (Let’s just say not all parts of Washington state are as lovely as Seattle.) My parents were, and still are, remarkably progressive for their generation- they never had an objection to same-sex marriage- but it was very much a place where “gay” was an insult, something to be mocked, not a valid identity.

I was lucky, beyond words, that when I came out as a lesbian, my family, at least, accepted it without question. There was some surprise, and from my mom there were a lot of well-meaning but innocently offensive questions and comments, but they never wavered in their support. I got them both “proud dad/proud mom” buttons from Pride last year and they were THRILLED to have them.

It seemed really clear cut back then. I was a lesbian. And since the lesbian community is so open to women who aren’t really feminine, I didn’t feel the need to doubt anything.

But the doubts were there, and had been since I was little. I was a “tomboy” as a kid, not of the “plays sports” variety but of the “hates anything girls stereotypically do” kind. I hated dresses and skirts, and threw a fit when my mom would make me wear them for special occasions. You could forget about makeup. The only feminine trait I kept by choice is my long hair (but obviously that’s a non-exclusively feminine trait since many men keep long hair too.) My mom asked me once, one of her innocently insensitive comments, “well, if you’re a lesbian, and you don’t do anything girly, what makes you a woman? Is it your hair?” and I told her no. I didn’t have an answer for what did besides “that’s what I am.” Because gender identity is more than physical characteristics, after all, and she is still wrong that you have to be “girly” or have something that makes you so to be a “real” woman.

But, I really only ever answered “woman” to the gender question because it was the default. I knew I wasn’t a transgender male, and so therefore, by the thinking instilled in me growing up, I had to be a woman. But it never felt exactly right. Sure, it didn’t feel WRONG, but it didn’t feel right. I never felt like other, cis women do, you know? Cis women LOVE being women. I didn’t. I was just like... “oh, whatever. Sure, I guess, yeah, let’s go with that.” I hate how large my breasts are, I hate my period, and when I think about sex, the thought of being penetrated repulses me. (Which is one part of why I realized the “lesbian” label applies to me... except [TMI alert] I don’t like the thought of women putting things inside me, either.) Further, I have tokophobia (the fear of pregnancy, as well as the fear of becoming pregnant) and used to get very upset when my mom would tell me I’d be a great mom, or “when you’re a mom you’ll (x)” because I hated how the very idea of pregnancy made me feel.

And, I mean, I know all those things don’t have to mean I’m not a woman. Lots of cis women feel the same things I listed. I’m not saying those are why, those are just little ways I felt different from others that always had me wondering. But even then, I still thought it was a combination of me being a lesbian and me being autistic. Cause, lots of autistic girls are also not into “girly” things. We tend to have sensitive skin, which makes things like fancy clothes or makeup or jewelry difficult if not unbearable. (Again, you can be girly without liking any of those things, I’m just listing some of the easier to explain examples here for the sake of brevity.)

So, those explanations kind of helped me make an identity for myself. I was a woman, because I wasn’t a man. And I may not have been really “girly”, but lots of others like me weren’t either. I was just another lesbian woman.

But then recently I saw this Tweet going around about pronouns, and each person would retweet it with a list of pronouns and their thoughts on being called each. (I think it was she/her, they/them, he/him, xe/xir, it, and some other neopronouns.) And I thought about how I would feel in each situation. My appearance is still really feminine, and I have a very high-pitched voice, so there is a 0% chance I would ever be called he/his “in the wild”. So, this was the first time I thought about being called anything but she/her.

She/her- well, that’s what I already am. Yeah, sure, go for it, I thought, and then went down the rest of the list.

They/them- Nah. I don’t like it. It doesn’t feel right at all.

Xe/xir- God please no.

It- If anyone ever calls me this I will punch them repeatedly.

Other neopronouns- No, this really doesn’t work for me.

Then I thought about he/his.

You know that noise you make in your head when someone types “!!!!!” ?

That’s how I felt.

It just... it felt so AMAZING!!!

So then I had to do some thinking. Maybe I was just a much more butch lesbian than I thought? I always did act like “one of the boys” with my friend groups in school.

But that didn’t seem right either. Because the more masculine terms I imagined people using to and about me, the happier I felt. Then over the next few days, some close friends of mine who I requested to do so started calling me “bro” and other masculine things as a bit of an experiment for me, and it just... it felt really damn nice.

Feminine language didn’t, and doesn’t still, make me feel bad or dysphoric or anything. If we put my feelings on a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “I’m about to cry” and 10 being “I’M SO HAPPY!”, having feminine language used for me is like a 6. It’s a “yeah, okay” sort of thing. But masculine? That’s a solid 10. I just smile every time I see it.

But as good as it felt, that created a bit of a problem for me. Because it felt a little too good to be a matter of being butch. So I was forced to engage in that dreaded activity known as “introspection”.

While I was trying to figure out what this all meant, I started looking at stuff people had written about being nonbinary. A lot of it made sense, really. Especially when people talked about subtle forms of dysphoria. Not all of it is hating your body, they explained. It definitely is a thing that happens to some people, but it takes lot of other forms... including stuff like what I listed above.

Feeling persistently different. Or even just feeling that it would be cool to have body parts change, even if you don’t want it enough to actually go out and change it. Cis people, they explained, would be horrified at the thoughts of changing anything. “It would be kinda cool if this was different” is still a form of dysphoria, still a decidedly NOT cis thing.

I know I’m not a trans man because I don’t want a lot of masculine features, like a deep voice or body hair, but I don’t enjoy a lot of my more feminine features either. So... nonbinary, because I’m neither, and I don’t WANT to be either male or female.

I’m still not sure what this all means for me, if it means making any significant changes or not, since this is all still pretty new for me. The only things I really know right now are that she/her or he/him pronouns are both fine, but I don’t like they/them, and I’m still going by Lexi online because I really don’t mind it at all; like I mentioned, feminine things don’t give me dysphoria or anything. I guess I could start going by Alex like I do IRL, but I don’t feel the need to.

And I also know that I’m only ever going to be out online, never in real life. I have transphobic siblings- even if they can understand me being a lesbian, trans people are a bridge too far for two of the three of them. One of them makes “attack helicopter” jokes and the other is outright a TERF. The other is open but admits to not knowing much about trans identities (which is fine!). I don’t feel like trying to explain to them what my nonbinary identity means when I’m still trying to figure out what my identity means myself.

I don’t really know why I made this post, really, since it only elaborates on what i said when I came out as nonbinary last week. I guess I just wanted to be open and honest with y’all since you’ve been so kind and supportive, so I wanted to let you know how I feel.

So, that’s that. Thanks for reading and listening and accepting, all. :)

#nonbinary

14 notes · View notes

szopenhauer · 4 years

Text

where were you 2 hours ago? in the local store do you kiss a lot of people? I kissed only one person in my entire life

are you wearing socks right now? ... no

have you bought any clothing items in the last week? yes

one thing you hate about yourself? my chronic illnesses mostly

what do you know about the future? we will all die, sooner or later

do you have a tan? slightly, on my arms

what day is tomorrow? Sunday

are you dating someone? yes

why? because of many reasons

using your current first initial choose a different name for yourself. Zefiryna or Zyta if polish what piece of furniture have you replaced the most? hmm... dunno, I’m not rich enough to replace my furniture

what do you think is the most over-rated candy ever? candies are overrated in general what is broken that you have, that you wish was fixed? my body line from the last thing you wrote to someone? jak uważasz

Have you ever wondered what you look like when you’re sleeping? yeah ^^” Do you put your friends or family first? my parents and my S.O. Do you have bad allergies? ugh... Are your parents proud of you? there’s nothing to be proud of Would you ever be your school’s mascot who wears that costume? I could Is/was your school full of fakes? obvi What age did you start staying home alone? I’m not sure tbh but late

Would you rather see the Great Wall of China or Big Ben? Big Ben because I’d prefer to visit England and not China Ice Ice Baby or U Can’t Touch This? both XD

Can you do a handstand? used to Do you own any shirts that are yellow? several What’s a brand of shoe you like, but wouldn’t buy a pair? creepers for example Would you like to live in a cottage home? yup but I won’t

Are you comfortable with your height? wish I was a bit taller Last text received?

Are you afraid of heights? not really

Were you happy when you woke up today? I was glad I could sleep almost 10 hours Have you ever laughed so hard you cried? few times hahaha Do you curse in front of your parents? oh well ^^” Are you slowly drifting away from someone close? ... What are you listening to right now? iamamiwhoami How is the weather right now? warm Have you ever been caught doing something you weren’t supposed to be doing? I don’t recall Do you use chapstick? ewww, gross How long do you think you will live? not much longer How’s your life going lately? no comment Have you ever had to get your blood drawn? countless times What is the most important thing to you? health that I don’t have Who was the last person you high fived? someone close to me Who hugged you last? parent Why do you feel the way you feel? where should I start... When was the last time you went shopping? this day as I already mentioned Are you liking how you look today? it’s ok Do you hate when they give a lot of tv commercials? especially when they repeat Are you a very stressed out person? that I am

Do you hate when people stare at you for no reason? awkward Which color is better? Red, Blue, Green, Black, or Yellow? definitely not red and blue *said a person who is wearing this today:

*I also hate pink, you will never understand me Are you good at hiding your feelings? can be but what for Is anyone annoying you right now? not rn Did you cry today? not so far When was the last time you had a sleepover? years ago Do you like taking pictures? kinda Don’t you hate that when it’s freezing cold outside your eyes get teary? that’s awful

Have you ever trespassed? it wasn’t a big deal Do you tell your parents where you are going? basics at least Can you give a good back massage? been told

Did you ever mix up the words “message” & “massage”? possibly Are there any other words you get mixed up? there are Do you think women should hold open doors for men, too? why not, it’s nice to be helpful Do you raise your hand or participate in class? umm... I had my moments Would you ever spend the night in a treehouse? doubt it? What do you think of people who own wild animals? hard to tell If a book was written about your life, what would be in the summary? no idea Are you good at explaining things, in general? I try my best to be straightforward and turn out being misunderstood If your friend had a drug-problem would you abandon them? I might, sorry Has a friendship ever ended over similar reasons? I wasn’t in a situation like this before Do you like window shopping? fun Do you mind lending money to your friends? I’m poor What, to you, is the best part of traveling? souvenirs Do you like to try new things? very rarely Does it bother you if someone talks bad about you? gossips/lies bother me

What time of day feels the most magical to you? sunrise and evening/night? Does your head hurt right now? bardziej mi się kręci w głowie po prostu Is your hair wet right now? dry Have you ever dreamt of being a famous athlete? I had a night dream about being an athlete ore than once but I dislike sports Do you have a rich friend that you’re jealous of? whoops you got me Are you interested in a girl who has a girlfriend? that girlfriend is me muahahaha Do most of the guys who like you annoy you? omg truth (I’m a lesbian though) but majority of society annoys me (especially men) so... What musical do you think you could play the lead in? Cats if I had talent What medical conditions do you have? what medical condition I don’t have... Do you wear leggings often? everyday Are you responsible in general? I avoid responsibilities Would you consider yourself mature? not enough, I’m childish Can you reach your ceiling? me?... Do you have a reading nook? I’m a librocubicularist Who is the cutest baby you know? babies ain’t cute *weird fact - I think those with Down syndrome are prettier - is that offensive?

What makes you nauseous? I constantly feel nauseous

Someone walks into your room, what do they notice first the amount of plushies

When you have sex, do you keep your eyes closed or open when finishing I tried to keep them closed, I’m embarassed If I stepped into your shower, what is the first item I would notice who knows

How many times a day do you think you sneeze it’s not a daily thing to me Your phone rings but you don’t know the number, would you answer it if I wait for a call like from hospital etc. How many cars have you actually owned 0 Do you always take a shower after you have sex no When you wash your hair in the shower to you face the faucet or away:. face Would you let the girl pay on the first date if she really wanted to split or else I just feel ashamed Have you ever had a friend who preferred the same sex I’m that friend ha! What was the name of the last alcohol you consumed that got you trashed not applicable Do you let your girlfriend drive, or do you prefer to we don’t drive The last time you had sex was it in the morning, afternoon or night afternoon

Are you afraid of stink bugs? they’re harmless :o Do you have a printer? but we don’t use it What is the closest thing to you that’s yellow? pencil Does anyone own any embarrassing pictures of you? I’m ugly on all photos... Do you care what others say about you? who and what? Are you into anime? blergh Name one movie that has made you cry more than once. ex. Five feet apart When is your father’s birthday? Mother’s? next year *my father is a Pisces and my mother is an Aquarius like me no more info for ya! Are you a sarcastic person? very Do you overthink things? 24/7, every single detail, even from ages ago Are you naturally paranoid? would say so

What was the last song you listened to? Lola Marsch - Echoes

Which is more important in your life, TV or Internet? internet, I don’t watch TV and I’d even choose net over movies if I had to Do you overuse smileys? gifs :P When was the last time you ate something? an hour ago *but I fill out this survey for couple of hours Have you seen all of the Jaws movies? I haven’t seen any of ‘em Do you know what Entomophobia is? had to google it When was the last time you played cards? (not on the computer) months ago Ever owned a pair of the original Nikes? (white, with only a single swoosh) not my type of shoes Ever worn leg warmers? yes, I still have several pairs When was the last time you read a book over 700 pages long? never, I only written over 700 pages Have you ever had a black eye? nope, just bags under my eyes

How do you mark through your word search puzzles? I cross them with my pen Do you hate people who ask a lot of questions? I enjoy questions but... Have you ever seen a roll of bluish-green toilet paper? yep Can you name five ‘z’ words off the top of your head? besides my name? in english or polish? If a rooster laid an egg on the peak of a roof which side would it roll to? roosters don’t lay eggs

1 note · View note

faunusrights · 6 years

Text

OFFAL HUNT REMASTER LIVEBLOG // CHAPTER 9

oh goody!

well this is it. the Date Chapter. the chapter, in which, the Date happens. lowkey im so fucking hype for this stupid goddamn chapter AAAAAAAAAAAA this is when the sexy got kicked up about seven notches and i know its gonna be a fucking twenty from here on out so LETS GO LESBIANS LETS GO

“Is this your date, Ms. Fall?” he asked.

Cinder didn’t look away from Glynda. “Mhm.”

STRAIGHT OUT OF THE GODDAMN GATE WE DIDN’T EVEN HAVE A SECOND TO EVEN GATHER OURSELVES JUST STRAIGHT UP HUH!!!!!!!!! ‘is this your date’ im legally dead

What the fuck.

already im fucking THRIVING im so glad this chapter’s mood got encapsulated within the first ten seconds and im definitely gonna have to re-read this chapter for the full unannotated experience OOOOOOOOOH MY GOD IM SO READY

Glynda’s thoughts ricocheted inside her head like coins left in a dryer. A part of her couldn’t understand what was happening and disengaged. The rest of her, grasping for purchase in all this, reasoned that going with Cinder was better than staying here confused, alone, and utterly displaced.

glynda ‘i aint ever had a gf before’ goodwitch at her PEAK right here. like GOD shes gone from ‘cinder’s trying to murder me’ to ‘cinder just plopped me right into a date’ like CINDER. CINDER YR CHANGING GEARS SO FAST. YOU DIDNT EVEN SEND FLOWERS OR ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

is it because shes a u-haul lesbian or

Higher, Glynda realized the dress itself was backless, revealing the black tattoo she’d seen so often before, perfectly centered between sharp shoulder blades.

this gay energy is BONKERS, quite frankly??????? where did cinder get her dress from? why does she have it? did she buy it just for this fuckery? or will she pull the ‘i just had a this lil number laying around’ line????????? does she wanna seduce glynda to death?????? was this PLANNED OR DID SHE JUST DECIDE SHE WANTED A DATE AND WTH LIFE REALLY IS SHORT ON REMNANT THESE DAYS?????????? cinder fall please explain your workings to the class

maybe Glynda wasn’t the only one who’d become adept at reading her opponent.

👏 when 👏 will 👏 they 👏 kiss 👏 already 👏👏👏👏

me: this is a slowburn also me: if u assholes dont give me this in the next ten seconds-

“Unarmed? As if you could be so helpless.”

cinder’s style of flirting is just. commentating on a person’s deadliness. that’s IT it’s the only TRICK SHE HAS and its working, is the thing,

im reading the description of the table and remembering the shitpost and oh my god i have to draw this???? hell IS real!!!!!! COULDNT YALL JUST TOSS EM IN A PLAIN BOX,

Cinder eyed her from her bastion of dark cushions,

cinder, ass-deep in cushions: this is peak cuddle territory come and join me

Cinder, for her part, seemed delighted Glynda had noticed. Touching the pendant more gently than Glynda might have ever thought her capable of, Cinder said, “Yours? You didn’t seem to mind parting with it.”

im still deeply enjoying this powermove the novelty NEVER wears off (and at risk of light spoilers i do enjoy its place in this story 👀)

Cinder let the necklace drop, settling against the swell of her bust once more,

/lightly coughs 👀👀👀

im losing my MIND at how gay this bit is i physically cannot HANDLE IT and if they even describe the meal once im gonna pop off cause i am. SO HUNGRY RN. AAAAAAAAAAAA

Cinder indicated a dish of lamb and vegetables, served on a bed of rice and drizzled in some sort of sauce.

SRY THIS ISNT GAY BUT OH MY GOD IM SO HUNGRY I WANNA E A T I T THAT SOUNDS SO GOOD UGHGHGHGHGHGH WHY DID THIS CHAPTER HAVE TO BE TODAY OF ALL THE DAYS,

Glynda cleared her throat, working out: “The Grimm.”

like. GOD WE KNOW GLYNDA IS JUST SO FUNCTIONALLY BAD AT CONVERSATION BUT OF ALL THE THINGS glynda please just. just. stop thinking abt her sexy tattoos for a fifth of a second,

“You can control them.” A sedate blink. For all the world, Glynda might have just commented on the weather.

which is a faux pas for a date!!!!!!!!!!! at least tell her the DRESS IS SEXY WE ALL KNO WHATS WHAT YR THINKIN ABT

Glancing down as though it were being pointed out to her for the first time, Cinder shrugged and adjusted the end of the glove a little higher on her bicep. “And?”

a quick aside im enjoying how like... visually expressive cinder is in this remaster! i can see her facial expressions and her motions really clearly in my mind’s eye which is a fun little boon if only because i have to redraw this nonsense hjsgdfjhfksgd but cinder’s got a Good Face this time around! A QUALITY FACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You should know by now, there’s something about you that’s simply irresistible to Grimm.”

HERE COMES THE PLOT (and a single surviving line so far... this one sentence has survived all the world could throw at it... we stan)

Cinder straightened, and Glynda saw that this was what she’d been waiting for.

“It isn’t every day the great Glynda Goodwitch kneels before her adversary, is it?”

HELLO??????????????????????????? WHATS THIS WORDING????????? honestly tho for a second i thought she meant like. quite literally and i thought id missed some PROPER SHIT RIGHT THERE BUT YEAH WTH!!!!!!! C I N D E R

“You cheated. You can’t beat me on your own.”

yes glynda we gathered that yr a top

“Really, Glynda? Poison?” she sneered, something like offense simmering in her expression. “After all this?”

looks at the camera

anyway,

god im literally losing grasp of words to say because theres such a charged mood in this scene............. theyre brushing fingers............ trading jabs.......... im slurpin it up babey!!!!!!!! this rly is the BEST remaster of this whole scene it DESERVES this wordcount!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“Beat you,” Cinder corrected. “And call it a point of pride.”

yes cinder we gathered yr a brat,

this dynamic is why this fic is so fuckign good when will winter have a swift return to add even more fuckery to this wild ride

Then, with a heavy-lidded look, Cinder found Glynda’s hand between them, the touch so sudden and daring that Glynda flinched. The fabric of those gloves was smooth against Glynda’s flesh, and for all that cruelty had marked every other instance of contact between them, Cinder was surprisingly gentle.

whomp there go my nuts

WHAT IS THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHO MADE THE EXECUTIVE CHOICE TO ADD THIS LINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HELLO???????????? im losing my BRAINCELLS

What she wasn’t ready for was for Cinder to guide her hand to her own throat and hold it there.

THERE IS IT THERE’S THE KINK IT’S BEEN SPOTTED

oh my GOD what even IS THIS WHO ADDED THIS SECTION WHO ALLOWED THIS TO COME TO P A S S WHAT THE FUCK EVEN IS RN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HELLO????????? HEWWO??????????

Now… Now Cinder interested her.

tbh how can i liveblog this? what commentary can i POSSIBLY add that we arent already all THINKING. we just launched into a level of hell so deep that lucifers gonna have to pull some goddamn tricks to follow us down here!!!!!!!!!! WHAT IS THIS SCENE! THIS MOMENT! IM SCREAMING

Glynda mirrored the expression back at him, and finally, he coughed, not making strong eye contact with either of them. He set their plate before them and hurried out without so much as a check-in.

i just KNEW that was gonna happen JHGDSFGJHKSDF he was gonna walk in on SMTHNG but i didnt think itd be CINDER’S CHOKING KINK,

okay i took a break and ate my weight in roast chicken and we’re back babey

Almost nervously, her fingers carded through her own dark hair, and there, among the locks, Glynda spotted a glimpse of something white, structured and ridged.

AND I AM INSTANTLY KNOCKED BACK UPON MY ASS 👈W👈H😨A👈T👈

It was easier to ignore the rest of it—whatever it was.

glynda you are a fool and a moron im withering into DUST

On no level had she expected those to be Glynda’s words.

then what... did she expect... well probably -- and rightly so -- ‘bitch WHAT ARE THOSE’ TBH

wait sorry i have to jump back because i forgot customary fingerguns on the most brazen bit of Shit yet:

Cinder was occupying herself with something else: the head of a dragon, perched over the door and staring down at the two of them with red, glossy eyes.

👈👈👈😎👈👈👈

okay BACK TO THE FIC

Fangs snapped together around the word.

aka back to me horni

/chanting TEETH! TEETH! TE

okay but the reason i doubled back to catch that fingergun is because we’re getting ass-deep into plot now!!!!!!!!!!! WITCHES AND DRAGONS BABEY......... HERE’S WHAT OFFAL HUNT IS ALL ABT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i cant rly drop more fingerguns than that because any astute reader will start realising the dots im shouting abt and honestly half the fun of this fic is the ride so >:3c

“Funny. I was sure he would have told you.”

that blow was so low i think cinder hit the concrete with that one

oh god theyre gonna get to the bit and i-

“Is that what all of this has been about? You called me here to remind me that I'm autistic?”

/SCREAMS

The words were delivered firmly, calmly, but Cinder’s response was the opposite, sudden upheaval seizing her. Her expression opened in something akin to panic. “Wh—no? What? No! That's not what I—”

/SCREAMS

oh my GOD CINDER YOU HAVE FUCKED UP LEGENDARILY!!!!!!!!!! OH MY GOD SHE WAS FELL ASS-FIRST ONTO A LANDMINE OH MY GOD

offal hunt v1 cinder: im totally in control and im playing glynda every step of the way

offal hunt v2 cinder: OH JESUS OH FUCK OH NO THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT-

Cinder seemed genuinely stressed now, speaking quicker as though trying to bury the last sixty seconds.

i knew this remaster would have sections that would blow me away but this bit really took the fcuking cake DGHSJFSJHFDG holy SHIT this is AMAZING

It was difficult to tell in the low light, but if Glynda wasn't mistaken, there was a bright flush of embarrassment coloring Cinder’s cheeks.

this is SUCH prime content hey remember in one of the early liveblogs that cinder would descend into full dork? WELL THE DESCENT CAME EARLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! /pops bottles

“Cinder.” There was a very real line of threat in Glynda’s tone. “Don’t.”

oh this whole scene just keeps getting better i am LOVING this dynamic now!!!!!!! before it was all pretty one-sided so having the conversation rock back and forth is 👌👌👌

That Witch soul of yours—it was designed to void out everything but the prey before you. To be numb to all human emotion. To focus on the hunt and nothing else.

finally the fruit of 50% of my fingerguns COMES TO LIGHT!!!!!!!!!!! PLOT PLOT PLOT

“This is bullshit.” Jabbing an accusing finger at Cinder, Glynda said, “You’re a liar. You’re a criminal!”

i LOVE glyndas pottymouth in this its such a good like... change from her being strict and formal and teachery and now shes full on gremlin huntress hell YES BABY!!!!!!!!!! GO OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“There’s all kinds of things I bet he never told you.” Cinder continued. “Did you know he was close to your predecessor? The Witch who came before you—they were inseparable.”

SRY IM LIKE STRUGGLIN TO COMMENTATE because so much of this like. speaking as an Old-Ass Reader this is like. a LOT! A LOT HAS CHANGED and yet,,,, stayed the same,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, yall kids WILL NEVER KNOW WHAT IT WAS LIKE TO HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL CHAPTER LIKE................ 15 FOR THIS SHIT (but like. chapter 15 was different because this chapter used to be like chapter 7? so now everythings moved along so chapter 15 doesnt sound that impressive but trust me it was a different fic back then)

When they fell away, burnt and ruined, she could see Cinder’s bare arms for the first time. The red lines drawn across her skin sloped down the entire length of her arms, circling her elbows, carved into her wrists. They ended right at her hands, ensuring any long-sleeved garment would hide them. Every covered inch of her was filled like a canvas, like abstract art.

lets pause the fight scene for glynda to be gay!!!!! god im. okay look i said this earlier but im so glad we have more cinder like this tbh. the first version was rly lacking w/ cinder content until late-game when the plot sorta. got itself going? but now we’re eye-deep in this content i LOVE cinder i love this WEIRDO who is a HUGE LOSER and IDIOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IM LOVE HER SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And Glynda could not dispel the fear that she had been telling the truth.

and after committing Some Amount In Damages, we’re at the end of the chapter!

okay so i really enjoyed this version SO MUCH MORE. everything abt it was polished and worked together so much better and it really needed the space to breathe in its own chapter. its been horny, gay, intense, hilarious, and way more in one chapter and its SO good this really is PEAK offal hunt!!!!!!!!!!!! good job diesel and kc but im still going to murder you both,

#rwby #offal hunt #liveblog

19 notes · View notes

artificialqueens · 6 years

Text

Tough Girl (Crameron) - Miss Bianca

Summary: Once she was perched on a stool, it took only moments for Kameron to realize that scoping out the place for a girl to take home would be hopeless. Not because there was any shortage of pretty ones, but because of a certain petite blonde woman who was standing behind the bar.

A/N: I’m back. Don’t know if anyone reading these days remembers me, since it’s been a few months, but bitch, I'm back. There’s a lot of s10 ships I’d potentially like to write, but crameron is at the top of my list, so here’s a long ass oneshot ft. witty dialogue, smut, and one hell of a plot twist. This will also be posted on ao3 (MissBianca), and please, for the love of god, tell me what you thought, either here or in my messages or asks (@mizkameron)!

“We’re getting too old for this bar hopping thing, you know.”

Asia reacted to Kameron’s statement with a shrug and a grin, hopping out of the front seat of the Uber and pulling open the back door.

“Speak for yourself,” she said, holding out a hand to help Kameron out of the car.

“‘M not too old for it,” Aquaria added, climbing out behind them on unsteady legs.

“She wasn’t talking to you, sweetie,” Asia laughed, wrapping an arm around Aquaria’s waist and squeezing her. “Also, you’re not having anything else to drink tonight.”

“Okay,” Aquaria said agreeably, her face scrunching into a smile as Asia kissed her cheek.

“Thirty-five isn’t anywhere near old in my book,” Asia said, looking over at Kameron. “And you’re younger than me! You know I can’t let you be a homebody until you’re at least fifty, Kameron.”

Kameron let out a sigh, smiling despite herself as Asia looped her free arm through hers and dragged the trio towards the third - and hopefully final - bar of the night.

Inside, it was hot and crowded, and Kameron regretted the decision to wear jeans the moment she stepped inside. Before she could even begin to get her bearings, Asia had vanished into a cluster of strangers with Aquaria trailing close behind her.

The bar was dimly lit and absolutely buzzing, music playing from speakers at the back and the rush of voices from all sides nearly drowning it out. Kameron wondered briefly where exactly the dividing line fell between bars and clubs, suddenly very aware that she was far too sober right now for this particular, club-like atmosphere.

Heaving a sigh, Kameron did her best to pull herself together, and made a beeline for the wall of drinks near the back, as had become routine for her whenever they went out. The scent of beer was strong, and the throngs of people that she passed were practically vibrating, the drunken excitement pressing in on Kameron from all sides and making her recede deeper into herself.

As much as she loved Asia, it took a good bit of alcohol and a lot of adrenaline for Kameron to feel like putting herself through her friend’s level of social interaction. Even though she’d had a few drinks already, they’d been spread out over several hours, and she didn’t think she was in the mood to push herself tonight.

If she was lucky, maybe Aquaria would join her at the bar after Asia tired her out, but it wasn’t likely. Kameron was always a bit of a third wheel with them, the odd one out. Despite Aquaria being the youngest by far, she was also one of Asia’s favorite people on the planet, which left Kameron fading into the background.

Regardless, going solo didn’t bother Kameron most of the time. Her solitude could be easily disguised as intentionally going out on her own, and her tendency to sit stoically at bars by herself, observing the people around her, made her come off as confident and interested in meeting new people. And in this particular case, her plans for her night centered on leaving with someone new - and not with her friends.

She only hoped that this bar wasn’t as straight as it looked.

Once she was perched on a stool, it took only moments for Kameron to realize that scoping out the place for a girl to take home would be hopeless. Not because there was any shortage of pretty ones, but because of a certain petite blonde woman standing behind the bar.

She was wearing a white tank top, and her hair was thick and bleached blonde, hovering around her face in curls that were just starting to get frizzy. Unlike most of the women Kameron had met who worked at restaurants or behind bars, she wasn’t bothering to smile at customers, her red lips remaining in a straight line as she took orders and mixed drinks.

She was definitely pretty, but it was something else about her, something about the way that she moved and stood, that had Kameron absolutely captivated.

“Miss? Can I get you something?”

Kameron jumped a little, turning to see another bartender, a black woman with a narrow face, looking at her inquisitively.

“I’m sorry, yes,” Kameron said, smiling distractedly. “Can I have a rum and coke, please?”

“Sure.”

As the woman started to busy herself with the drinks, Kameron’s gaze returned to the other bartender, who was wiping the counter at the other end of the bar. Now that the blonde was farther away, Kameron could see the tight leather skirt that she was wearing, and she wet her lips.

“You eyeing my girl?” A drink had been set down in front of Kameron, and the black bartender was raising an eyebrow.

“Your girl?” Kameron asked blankly, blinking at her. “Are you two -”

“Nah, I’m just messing with you,” the bartender said with a laugh. “She’s a friend.”

“Oh.” Kameron took a sip of her drink, relieved but unsure what to say.

“Her name’s Brianna, if you’re interested,” the bartender added, a mischievous smile on her face. “I know her pretty well, and you look like her type.”

Surprised, Kameron took a moment too long to stammer out a thank you, the bartender disappearing through a door behind the bar before catching her words.

She kept her eyes on the blonde woman - Brianna, the other bartender had said - watching her mix drink after drink, cracking an occasional joke which Kameron could never catch, always resulting in uproarious laughter from whoever she was serving. Her hands moved so quickly, so surely, and Kameron found herself chewing on her lower lip as she watched.

Eventually, Kameron began to realize that taking the stool at the end of the bar might have been a mistake. It had been nearly a half hour now, and Brianna still hadn’t even looked her way. She didn’t want to get drunk, particularly, but the boredom was kicking in, and she found herself taking longer sips of her cocktail, just for something to do. With her tolerance, it was unlikely she’d get past mildly tipsy.

After another ten minutes or so, the inevitable straight guy wandered up to the bar to start hitting on her, starting with a canned comment about how lonely she looked all by herself, followed up by a long pause as he stared at her ample cleavage through the laced up front of her v-neck shirt. It was like clockwork, how all of them behaved almost identically, and Kameron observed with a vague sense of amusement, feeling almost as if she was watching the whole interaction from somewhere outside of her body.

“Lemme buy you a drink, sweetheart.”

“I’m fine, thanks.”

“What sexy thing like you wants to drink alone?”

“I said, I’m fine.”

“C’mon, don’t be like that.”

He stepped closer, just as Kameron expected. Sighing, she flicked her hair off of her shoulder, sliding the strap of her shirt down over her shoulder to give him a good view of the lesbian symbol tattooed just under her collarbone.

“Take a hint, asshole,” she said flatly, tapping it with a fingertip.

“Hey, maybe you just haven’t met the right guy yet.”

“If you’re really that desperate, I’ve got a friend named Boomer who’d love your number,” Kameron said with a shrug, skipping the bullshit and pulling out the final weapon in her arsenal to finish off the conversation for good. “You’re just his type. He loves the short, pretty ones.”

“I’m not gay!” The offense on his face was so dramatic that it was hard to keep a straight face, and Kameron pulled the strap of her shirt back into place and shrugged.

“Maybe you just haven’t met the right guy yet.”

Kameron turned her attention back to Brianna as he fumbled for words, finally muttering out some comment about how he wasn’t short or pretty, either, before melting back into the crowd.

Rolling her eyes, Kameron tapped her fingers on the cool side of her glass, watching as Brianna talked to the other bartender and wishing that she was close enough to get her attention without seeming desperate. It had to be after 1 AM by now, and the noise and crowded environment of the bar were rapidly draining what energy she had left.

There was a burst of laughter, and Kameron glanced up just in time to see Brianna plant a kiss on the other bartender’s cheek and leave through the door behind the bar, a purse slung over her shoulder. Making a split second decision, Kameron downed the rest of her drink quickly, then dug in her clutch for a ten dollar bill and placed it neatly under her empty glass.

Sliding off her stool, she made her way around the clusters of people as fast as she could, pushing out into the hot August air. As soon as she stepped outside onto the mostly-empty street, Kameron released a breath she didn’t know she’d been holding. She looked around for a back door, trying to figure out where Brianna might’ve left from.

Spotting an alley that ran alongside the building, Kameron headed in that direction, hoping that luck was on her side tonight. Resting a hand against the brick wall, she peered around the corner, and sure enough, Brianna was slipping out a door not too far away.

Glancing upwards, Kameron debated whether to walk down to meet her or wait on the corner. Staying put was probably the best idea, she figured, and it fit with the relaxed, collected vibe she liked to give off.

When she looked around the corner again, her stomach dropped.

Brianna was against the wall, a man that must’ve been a foot taller than her holding something that looked like a knife to her throat.

Kameron’s adrenaline kicked in instantly, her heartbeat skyrocketing, and she was running down the alley before she could even consider her options.

“Hey!” she shouted, breathless.

The man looked over at her just as she collided with him hands first, pushing him off of Brianna and hearing the knife clatter against the pavement.

“Fucking bitch!” The man swayed, clearly inebriated, and Kameron turned towards Brianna, resting a hand on her arm.

“Are you okay?”

Brianna opened her mouth to reply, and then a hand grabbed Kameron’s shoulder, pulling her away from Brianna.

“Stay outta my way!” the man slurred, winding his arm back.

Time slowed down, just for a second, and Kameron could see his fist moving towards her face. She leaned to the side at the last minute, trying to dodge the blow on instinct, and then a white-hot flash of pain cut through her cheek, and she saw stars.

Kameron stumbled, her shoulder colliding with brick, hand clasped to her cheek. There was another shout from the man, and she blinked away the tears that were clouding her vision.

Brianna’s hair bounced, and Kameron watched, dazed and disoriented, as the blonde’s fist collided with his gut, an upwards angle that made him grown hollowly and stagger. She threw her weight against him, shoulder hitting him squarely in the middle of the chest, and he fell backwards, crashing down onto the blacktop. He let out another groan, and then fell still.

Kameron stared, open mouthed, trying to process what she was seeing and unable to put the pieces together.

“Are you okay?” Brianna was making her way over, rubbing her knuckles, a concerned expression on her face.

Reaching up, she laid her hand over Kameron’s that was still pressed to her cheek. Brianna’s teeth dug into her lower lip as she lifted their hands away for a brief moment, surveying the injury. The pain had subsided inexplicably, and Kameron noticed for the first time that her own palm was slippery.

“He must’ve had a ring,” Brianna mused. Her eyes were big, a dark brown that Kameron hadn’t identified in the bar. “It’s more a cut than a bruise, doesn’t look too bad. Keep the pressure on it.”

“You’re pretty,” Kameron murmured, accidentally speaking her thoughts out loud.

Brianna stared up at her for a moment, a bemused smile slowly growing on her face.

“All right, let’s get you cleaned up,” she said decisively, pulling Kameron up off the wall and leading her towards the main street by her arm. “What’s your name?”

“Where are we going?” Kameron asked, feeling slow and stupid.

“My place,” Brianna said. “You’re not dizzy, are you? Can you walk without me holding you?”

Kameron thought about that for a moment, shaking her head to clear it, and then nodded.

“Yes, what?”

“I’m okay,” she confirmed. “Oh, and, Kameron - my name is Kameron.”

“Good, no concussion. I’m Brianna. My Uber will be here soon, so hang tight, babe.”

Babe. Kameron smiled.

The Uber ride was short, and they both sat in the back, Brianna keeping a slightly concerned eye on her. The cut was hurting again, but Kameron was distracted enough by Brianna’s close proximity to her that she wasn’t paying much attention.

When the car turned a corner, Brianna wound up leaning against her, one hand resting on Kameron’s thigh for support, and Kameron noticed for the first time that she was wearing perfume. After a few moments, she identified the scent as vanilla, strong enough to cover the stench of beer that would likely be clinging to her otherwise. Breathing Brianna in was calming and exciting at the same time, and Kameron could’ve sat like that with her forever, warmth spreading through her chest and a slight smile on her face.

By the time they’d arrived and climbed the four flights to Brianna’s apartment, Kameron felt much steadier on her feet, and she started struggling to wrap her brain around the series of events that had lead her to this point.

“What - what happened, exactly?” Kameron asked, hoping for clarification, as Brianna unlocked the door.

“You must’ve spotted me as soon as I stepped out the door,” Brianna said, directing Kameron inside. “And so did he, the big guy. He’d just pushed me against the wall - I think he was going for my purse - and then you came out of nowhere. Rammed into him like a runaway train.”

“Yeah, I remember that. I asked if you were okay.”

“Right, very sweet.” Kameron smiled at the comment, and Brianna continued. “He grabbed you, wheeled you back around, and went in for a punch. You dodged, I guess, because he only managed to graze that pretty cheek of yours.”

“I tried,” Kameron nodded. “But what happened after that is what I’m not, uh… not sure of.”

“Well, as heroic as it was of you to try to save me, I have a black belt in karate,” Brianna said, a note of affectionate sarcasm in her tone. “Did ya really think I’d be dressed like this in that area of town if I couldn’t defend myself?”

“I mean, I guess not,” Kameron said after a moment, looking down. A mixture of realization and embarrassment surged through her, and she cleared her throat. “You were… clearly very capable. I was actually trying to figure out if I imagined it all.”

“Nope.” Brianna shook her head. “He looked like was going to come at you again, so I did what I could. You know, took down the bad guy, saved the pretty girl. Everyday stuff in the life of your average bartender.”

Kameron laughed quietly at that, suddenly glad that her hand was still pressed to the cut. Hopefully, Brianna wouldn’t be able to see how her cheeks were flushed, as if she was a shy teenager again. All of the confidence and composure that she usually relied on to keep her anxiety at bay had been stripped away by the unexpected turn of events, and it was as if a rug had been pulled out from under her, leaving her struggling to catch her balance.

Kameron looked around at the small apartment, trying to distract herself. It was mostly one room, with a couple of doors to the left. She stared blankly at the small TV against the far wall, trying to figure out how she should feel.

There was no reference to go by - she’d never been saved or defended physically, much less by a woman a half foot shorter than her who unexpectedly turned out to be hiding a lot of muscle under her profoundly un-intimidating exterior.

“I’ll give you the grand tour,” Brianna said, pulling Kameron out of her thoughts. “This half is the kitchen, and the dining room. That half is the living room, starting with the couch. Kid-sized bedroom and bathroom are to the left. Luckily, I’m literally the height and weight of a large child, so it’s nice and roomy for me.”

“It’s hot,” Kameron said, realizing that it hadn’t gotten any cooler since they’d entered the building. “I didn’t notice at first…”

“Yeah, the AC’s broken everywhere except the bathroom,” Brianna sighed, rolling her eyes. “They won’t fix it. Good thing we’re going in there first anyway.”

True to her word, Brianna’s bathroom was both tiny and freezing, and Kameron felt oversized in comparison, her face hot as Brianna pushed her down by the shoulders, sitting her on the lid of the toilet seat. A slender thumb brushed just under the gash on Kameron’s cheek, and Brianna squinted slightly, her fingers tucking under Kameron’s chin to tilt her face up towards the fluorescent light.

Brianna made an inquisitive noise, brushing Kameron’s hair back and off of her shoulder, and then her free hand was moving from Kameron’s cheek to the side of her neck, tracing the tattoo there lightly.

“I like it,” Brianna said, under her breath. A fingertip slowly outlined the points of the crystal, and Kameron held her breath, immobilized by Brianna’s touch even as her heart raced in her chest.

“Thanks,” she managed to reply, her throat dry.

“If this scars, it’s gonna be really badass,” Brianna mused, her attention abruptly returning to the matter at hand. “It’ll probably match the whole look you’ve got going.”

Her entire body still buzzing from the teasing contact, Kameron swallowed and kept her gaze straight ahead until Brianna released her and moved towards the sink, stretching up to grab items from the cabinet behind the mirror. She was saying something else, but Kameron couldn’t collect her thoughts enough to listen, too busy watching as Brianna’s white tank came untucked and crept up her stomach.

She bit her lip, and winced as the movement pulled at the gash on her cheek. Brianna padded back over, soaking a cotton ball in disinfectant, and Kameron wondered absentmindedly why the other woman had chosen to wear stockings under her skirt.

“This is going to sting, babe.”

Brianna’s voice was low, a soft murmur. Her tank top was rolled up just under her ribs, and she was so close that Kameron could see the goosebumps rising on her stomach from the air conditioning. It occured to Kameron then, how easy it would be wrap her hands around Brianna’s tiny waist, rub her thumbs over the tight abdominal muscles and make her shiver for other reasons.

She was trying to work up the nerve to do it, figuring that Brianna did bring her back to her apartment and voluntarily position herself this close by, when Brianna lifted her chin again and interrupted her train of thought by dabbing the cut with the cotton ball.

The flash of pain made Kameron hiss, and she gritted her teeth, determined to maintain whatever composure she had left by staying silent and still as rock.

The next touch hurt even more, and Kameron dared to risk eye contact and look at Brianna’s face, needing something to distract her. Thankfully, Brianna was focused on her work, her brows furrowed slightly, lips pressed tight together.

The harsh lighting in the room should’ve been unflattering - Kameron knew she herself couldn’t possibly look good in it - but somehow, Brianna managed to be strikingly pretty anyway.

“Almost done, you’re not even bleeding anymore,” Brianna said under her breath, her expression slightly amused. “Look at you, tough girl. Staying all quiet and stoic.”

Brianna chuckled quietly, and Kameron inspected her expression, trying to figure out how to react.

“I’m not sure if that was meant to be shady or not,” she finally said after a moment, clearing her throat.

“Mmm,” Brianna hummed.

“You’re, like, really hard to read, you know that?”

“And you’re really cute,” Brianna replied, dabbing at Kameron’s cut one more time and then giving a little nod, apparently deciding to leave it at that. She turned, occupying herself with something by the sink that Kameron couldn’t see.

“Even after I made a goddamn fool of myself and got my ass kicked?” Kameron laughed a little, trying to compensate for her own embarrassment. “So stupid.”

“Yeah,” Brianna replied, wheeling back around with a genuine grin on her face and a handful of small butterfly bandages. “Definitely stupid, but also cute. Stupid-cute.”

“That didn’t feel like a compliment,” Kameron muttered, smiling despite herself.

“Well, take what you can get,” Brianna replied, leaning in again and starting to affix the paper stitches to Kameron’s cheek. The pull on her skin stung, but she bit her tongue. “I don’t hand out compliments often.”

“Do you bring random women into your apartment to play nurse often?” Kameron glanced up at her.

“Only when they look like they could beat me in a wrestling match,” Brianna said dryly, the corner of her mouth twitching.

“I think we’ve established that I most definitely could not.”

“But you could probably bench press me,” Brianna pointed out.

“Probably,” Kameron agreed, wondering if the comment gave her an excuse to reach for Brianna’s waist, or grab onto her hips, like she’d been itching to do all night. “Want me to try?”

“Tempting as that sounds, I’m currently saving your life, so it’ll have to wait,” Brianna deadpanned, and Kameron snorted.

A few moments passed in silence, and then Brianna tapped the edges of butterfly stitches lightly with her finger and nodded.

“Am I gonna make it through the night, you think?” Kameron asked, her lips twitching.

“Well, it was rough going there for a bit, but I think you’re in the clear,” Brianna replied, her tone overly serious. “You wouldn’t believe how many times I’ve had injured women flatline in this very bathroom.”

Kameron couldn’t help but laugh at that, standing up from her position on the toilet lid. Brianna was putting her first aid materials back into the mirror closet, the corner of her mouth turned up in a smile.

“You’re one of the lucky ones,” Brianna added. She pulled her shirt down, much to Kameron’s disappointment, and proceeded to shoo her out of the bathroom.

“Clearly.”

The sudden rise in temperature as Kameron passed through the doorway was was almost dizzying. For the second time that night, she found herself regretting wearing jeans, wishing that the vibe she wanted to give off to potential hookups didn’t have a dress code.

She leaned back against the counter in Brianna’s corner kitchen, running her hands through her hair and flipping it back. Brianna had already swept past her in a rush of vanilla perfume, and was in the process of methodically emptying her purse onto the wooden table. Kameron frowned, about to ask why she was taking out her sunglasses and wallet, but before she could, Brianna lifted the purse and dumped the rest of the contents - a surprising amount of wadded up dollar and five dollar bills - onto the table.

“You’re organized,” Kameron commented after a moment, watching as Brianna rapidly sorted through the bills, flattening each one with the heel of her hand before stacking them in piles.

“My only redeemable trait,” Brianna said dryly.

“I dunno, I think you’re a pretty good bartender, too,” Kameron said, crossing her ankles and resting her elbows on the counter behind her. “And a good substitute nurse. Not to mention that ass-kicking you did behind the bar.”

Brianna shrugged, a small smile on her face.

“That cut still sore?” she asked, directing the subject away from herself.

“A little,” Kameron said, trying to brush it off. “I’m okay, though.”

“I can tell you’re lying, you know,” Brianna said with a chuckle. “You don’t have to prove anything to me, babe. Vulnerability is sexy, or so I’ve been told.”

“I’ve heard that too.” Kameron flattened her hands against the counter. “Never really believed it.”

“Me neither.”

Brianna met her gaze, and they both smiled.

“But, really, though,” Brianna said after a moment, breaking the eye contact and picking up a bottle of pills that she’d taken out of her purse earlier. “I have ibuprofen, if it hurts.”

“Yeah, it does,” Kameron admitted. “Thanks.”

Brianna waved the gratitude away, and tossed her the pill bottle. Before Kameron could even ask for water, Brianna was filling a glass from the sink, and Kameron was impressed once again by how quickly she moved.

“Thanks,” Kameron repeated as Brianna handed her the glass.

“Mmmhm,” Brianna hummed. She had returned to the table, and was stacking the last bills. Kameron watched her hands, almost mesmerized, as rolled the stacks up, and secured them quickly with rubber bands from a dish in the center of the table.

“You’re very good with your hands,” Kameron said softly, and the corner of Brianna’s mouth turned up.

“Not the context I usually hear that in.”

Kameron took a sip of water, her throat feeling suddenly dry. Now would be the perfect time to make a move, but she couldn’t figure out how, positive that anything she said wouldn’t be nearly as quick-witted or appropriate as what Brianna might come up with. Frustrated, she chewed on the inside of her cheek, staring at the ground and hoping Brianna wouldn’t notice her annoyance.

“It’s late,” Brianna said finally, zipping her purse closed. “You should probably spend the night.”

When Kameron glanced back up at her, Brianna was already staring at her, an eyebrow cocked. The suggestion felt unmistakably like a challenge, and Kameron fumbled for the right response, the palpable sexual tension making her face grow hot.

“I can, if you want,” she said finally, the words tumbling out too fast.

“Well, I’m not sending you out on your own at this hour,” Brianna said resignedly. “I didn’t save your ass just to have you leave and get it kicked again.”

“Right,” Kameron nodded, forcing out a laugh and looking down again, a sinking feeling in her gut. “I can sleep on your couch, I guess.”

“Yeah, that’s definitely something you can do.”

Kameron cursed at herself internally as Brianna walked right by her and towards her bathroom. Whatever the challenge had been, she’d clearly failed, and Brianna seemed impatient, almost exasperated. Kameron grabbed her clutch from the counter and walked over to the couch, kicking off her pumps a bit more aggressively than was probably necessary.

She busied herself with her phone as she heard the water running in the bathroom, growing even more irritated with herself as she watched Aquaria’s Instagram story. She was clearly drunker than she’d been earlier, and every single video featured an almost-equally-drunk Asia pressed against her, laughing or kissing the side of her face.

The feeling of missing out on things due to her shy, introverted nature had been always been a constant in Kameron’s life, and over time, she’d grown to accept it. But tonight, it was frustrating, to say the least.

“Here, you can wear these,” Brianna called, tossing a bundle of clothing into Kameron’s lap.

Kameron mumbled a thank you, but Brianna was already walking into bedroom. She watched as the other woman started to strip, her back to the doorway, fingers sliding under the clasp of her nude bra. Coming to her senses, Kameron shook her head and focused her attention on the pile of fabric in her lap.

There was a t-shirt and a pair of shorts, and Kameron lifted the shirt, eyeing it amusedly. Clearly, Brianna wasn’t thinking straight. They probably hadn’t been anywhere close to the same size since Kameron was in middle school. She set them on the coffee table as neatly as she could, and flipped through notifications on her phone to distract herself until Brianna’s bedroom door clicked shut, leaving the rest of the apartment dark except for the light coming in through the window.

She kicked off her pumps and stood, peeling off her jeans and laying them over the arm of the couch. She didn’t even bother with the clothes Brianna had left her, figuring that the boyshorts she was wearing covered enough of her ass. And besides, if Brianna was to wander out of her room, there wasn’t really a downside to her getting a look at Kameron’s thigh tattoo. Kameron figured that with the amount of money it had cost, it deserved to be showed off. And if the way Brianna had traced the tattoo on her throat fascinatedly was any indication, it might just raise the chances of her leaving tomorrow with the other woman’s number.

After a moment of consideration, Kameron stripped out of her shirt as well, and collapsed on the couch with a sigh. She usually slept naked, even with her own, functional air conditioning, and it was far too hot in Brianna’s apartment to wear more than undergarments.

She flopped onto her back, tucking a worn out pillow under her head, and stared up at a crack in the ceiling. Brianna hadn’t given her a blanket, she realized. Then again, it wasn’t as if she’d use it.

Turning onto her side, Kameron huffed out another sigh. This night hadn’t turned out how she’d planned, and now that she was left with her thoughts, Kameron found herself growing more and more frustrated.

It wasn’t as if there hadn’t been an opportunity to come onto Brianna. In fact, there’d been multiple moments where Kameron knew that she could’ve made a move, not to mention Brianna’s obvious flirting and interest in her. Making moves on women was never a department she’d lacked confidence before, but there was just something about Brianna in particular that stripped away the facade that she usually wore for her one night stands, revealing the shy, unsure person that she was underneath.

The shift of dynamic was intimidating, but it was also exciting, and Kameron was surprised at how attractive she found Brianna’s toughness and command of every situation.

She just wished that she’d had the nerve to follow Brianna into her bedroom.

Rolling onto her back again, Kameron heaved another sigh. Her eyes had adjusted, and the room seemed practically bright now.

Suddenly, the bedroom door opened, and light flooded over the couch, making Kameron cover her eyes with her forearm. Propping herself up, she peered at the door just in time to Brianna emerge in a pair of sleep shorts and a camisole, with an expression on her face that Kameron could only describe as determination.

“Hey,” Kameron greeted her, surprised.

“It’s too hot to sleep,” Brianna said by way of reply, passing by the couch without even looking at her. “You want a beer?”

“Um, yeah.” Kameron sat up and ran her hands through her hair, wondering if this was God or the universe giving her a second shot at ending the day right.

The small light in the kitchen area clicked on, and Brianna could be heard opening the fridge. Her heart rate already picking up speed, Kameron checked her phone for the time - 2:32 AM - and then shot Asia and Aquaria a text confirming that yes, she was fine, and no, she hadn’t gotten laid yet. She briefly considered putting her shirt back on, but before she could make a decision, Brianna was rounding the back of the couch and handing her an open beer bottle.

“Thanks.” Kameron glanced up to find Brianna staring at her, lips slightly parted. She took a sip of beer to hide her satisfied smile, suddenly feeling very grateful for Brianna’s overheated apartment.

“So, is there a reason why you’re practically naked?” Brianna said after a moment, perching on the edge of the couch, her tone almost too calm.

“Your broken air conditioner.” Kameron crossed her arms under her boobs, and looked over at Brianna. “And the fact that you’re several sizes smaller than me.”

“Giving you my clothes was pretty stupid, wasn’t it?” Brianna asked rhetorically, a short laugh escaping her as her eyes flicked up and down Kameron’s body again.

“Yeah,” Kameron agreed. “The fact that you apparently want to see me in your clothing is cute, though.”

“Stupid-cute,” Brianna said under her breath, and Kameron flashed her a smile.

The sleep shorts Brianna wore left her thighs exposed, and Kameron could see the flex of muscle under her pale skin as she crossed her legs neatly. Kameron swallowed thickly, her knuckles turning white as she gripped her beer bottle.

“I’d say I’m sorry about the heat, but I think we both know I’d be lying,” Brianna said.

“Oh, is that so?”

“Oh, so now you wanna play coy?” Brianna was leaning back on one of her hands. “Now that you’re on my couch in lingerie, it seems like the right time to act like you’re unaware of how hot you are?”

Yet again, the smile on her face seemed almost like a challenge, and Kameron was determined not to fail a second time.

“Hot?” Kameron could feel her confidence rising, the cocky attitude that she’d been trying to get back all night appearing all at once. “I dunno, I thought I was just cute.”

“Oh, please, now you’re just fishing for compliments,” Brianna laughed.

Kameron hummed amusedly in reply and shrugged, watching the smaller woman lift her own bottle to her lips, the line of her neck extending as she tilted her head back. There was a bead of sweat rolling down her chest, from the hollow of her throat to the space between her breasts.

“Like I said, it’s hot,” Kameron said, following the line of Brianna’s collarbone with her gaze. “I just couldn’t get comfy in my clothing.”

“It’s cooler out here than in my bedroom,” Brianna said.

Kameron doubted that. Maybe it’d been tolerable before, but now that Brianna was nearby and flirting with her again, the little clothing that she was wearing felt like it was sticking to her. She tossed her hair back, raking a hand through it in an attempt to get it off of her neck.

She could feel Brianna’s eyes on her, and resisted the urge to stare back for as long as possible, exhaling a long breath and rolling her shoulders a few times in an effort to calm down. When she finally turned to meet Brianna’s eyes, the other woman was biting her lower lip hard enough that it was a shock she hadn’t drawn blood.

The resulting rush of confidence nearly made Kameron’s head spin.

“See something you like?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.

Brianna stared at her for a moment, tongue poking out of the corner of her slightly open mouth.

“Alright, enough,” Brianna said finally, standing up. “Put down your bottle.”

“Why?”

“Put it down.”

Kameron opened her mouth, and then closed it, leaning forwards to set her bottle on the coffee table. Brianna dropped hers beside it, and then her hands were on Kameron’s shoulders again, using her for support as she climbed onto her lap.

Before Brianna could even settle her weight, Kameron was sitting up straighter and reaching for her waist. Brianna pushed her back against the couch forcefully, fingers digging into the hard muscle of Kameron’s shoulders, knees digging into the outsides of her thighs.

“No more dancing around this,” Brianna announced, voice breathy. “It’s happening, now.”

Not about to argue, Kameron gripped Brianna’s hips tightly, slid her thumbs up under her camisole, the heat of the other woman’s skin nearly enough to burn. Brianna made a noise in her throat, and Kameron took that as an invitation to move her hands higher, pushing the fabric up and dragging her palms over Brianna’s sides.

Brianna twisted in her hold, exhaling against Kameron’s skin, and Kameron couldn’t think about anything other than kissing her until the heat and lack of oxygen made the smaller woman lightheaded and soft in her hands.

As if she could hear Kameron’s thoughts, Brianna finally closed the rest of the space between them, one hand cupping Kameron’s jaw as she crushed their lips together.

The kiss was more like a collision than anything else, rough and hot, and Kameron let Brianna take control as soon as the other woman’s tongue pressed between her lips. She tasted like mint and beer, and Kameron felt drunk and clumsy, Brianna’s fingers combing through her hair, body pressing closer and closer every second.

She raked her nails up Brianna’s sides, pushing the thin camisole higher still, and Brianna’s responding moan vibrated against her lips. Kameron needed the clothing to be gone, needed all of Brianna’s skin bare under her hands. She needed both of them naked, stripped down and pressed together, slick with sweat and sex.

The moment Brianna pulled back from the kiss, she was leaning back, stripping her own shirt off and tossing it onto the couch beside them. She wasn’t wearing a bra, and Kameron cursed quietly, immediately moving her hands up higher to rub her thumbs over Brianna’s dark nipples. They were impossibly hard despite the heat, and Brianna’s breath caught in a perfect little moan as Kameron rolled one of them between her thumb and index finger.

“I was - I was waiting for you to make this happen,” Brianna said. “Why do you think I left the door to my room open?”

“I don’t know,” Kameron breathed, meeting Brianna’s gaze. “You seem so sure of yourself, I was just following your lead.”

Brianna leaned in to kiss her again briefly, one hand resting on Kameron’s shoulder and the other pulling down urgently on the cups of her bra, fingers digging roughly into her breasts. She released Kameron’s bicep, reaching behind her and deftly unhooking the bra, and Kameron shrugged it off as fast as she could.

“What the fuck?” Brianna panted the question, eyes wide and pupils dark as they flickered over Kameron’s body.

“Yeah, they’re real,” Kameron said, huffing out a laugh and grabbing Brianna’s wrists, pressing her chest into the other woman’s hands. She sighed at the feeling. “I swear. Daily push-ups are better than any boob job.”

Brianna’s hands looked tiny cupping her breasts, the soft flesh spilling between her fingers, Kameron’s skin turning pale as she squeezed. Kameron wet her lips, unable to tell whether the sight or the sensation affected her more.

Before she could figure it out, Brianna was leaning down and sucking one of her nipples into her mouth. Kameron let out a small moan that was more like a whimper, her head falling back against the top of the couch. Brianna’s lips trailed higher, palms spreading Kameron’s breasts as she lapped at the sweat collecting between them.

Struggling to keep her lungs working, Kameron ran her fingers through Brianna’s platinum blonde hair, collecting it in her hands. She looked down, her stomach twisting at the sight of Brianna’s face buried in her breasts.

Closing her eyes, Kameron tried to gather herself, regain some control over the situation. And then, Brianna’s teeth dug into her skin suddenly, unexpectedly. Kameron cursed out loud, tugging on her hair sharply, and the responding moan from Brianna was absolutely filthy. Kameron squeezed her own thighs together, the rush of arousal making her dizzy.

Needing to hear that sound again, Kameron moved her hands closer to Brianna’s scalp, wrapping the locks around her fingers before tugging again, this time pulling Brianna’s head back along with her hair. Brianna groaned, gripping Kameron’s biceps and grinding down against her lap.

Kameron pulled her in, crashing their lips together again, Brianna’s hair tangled tight in her fingers to keep her still. She nipped at Brianna’s lower lip experimentally, and nails dug into her arms as Brianna let out a strangled moan.

The kiss felt more sensual than it had been before, less aggressive, and this time, it wasn’t difficult for Kameron to take control. This was far more familiar territory for her, and Brianna was practically melting in her grasp, going sweet and soft like ice cream in the summer heat.

The breathy whimpers and gasps that Brianna let out every time Kameron tugged at her hair were unbearably sexy, and Kameron felt herself losing total track of time, caught up in the intoxicating feeling of nearly suffocating from kisses that seemed to keep growing longer and messier.

Tilting Brianna’s head back, Kameron trailed her lips down the other woman’s neck, biting at the soft skin gently before soothing it with her tongue.

“Mmm, Kam, please.” Brianna was practically whining now, her voice weak and high.

“Did you want something, baby?” Kameron asked, hiding a smile in the hollow of Brianna’s throat and winding her fingers tighter in her hair.

Brianna only groaned in reply and squirmed, her hips bucking as Kameron sucked hard on her pulse point. Once she’d gotten past the tough exterior, Brianna was exactly the girl that Kameron had thought she was - the kind who begged, and whimpered, and left imprints from their nails in Kameron’s biceps.

Now that the power had shifted, Kameron was in her element, and she had to take a little time to enjoy it.

“I can’t do anything if I don’t know what you want,” she prompted, her voice low, pressing slow kisses up the pale column of Brianna’s neck.

“Fuck me,” Brianna breathed, giving in and tugging urgently at one of Kameron’s wrists.

Unable to wipe the cocky smile off of her face, Kameron released Brianna’s hair, allowing the other woman to guide her hand down and between her legs. Leaning up to kiss her again, Kameron cupped Brianna through the thin, loose fabric of her sleep shorts, eyes fluttering shut at the damp heat against her palm.

Brianna was panting and whimpering into the kiss, gripping Kameron’s shoulders for support and grinding steadily against her hand. Their chests brushed together, skin against skin, Kameron’s nipples dragging over Brianna’s ribs with every movement and sending her body into overdrive.

When Brianna whimpered for more, Kameron didn’t bother waiting, pushing the crotch of her shorts to the side, breath catching as she dragged her fingertips through the sticky wetness beneath. She pressed two fingers against Brianna’s entrance, just barely dipping inside, gaze focused on how Brianna’s abs flexed as her hips rolled forwards.

“Mmmm, you want it?” Kameron teased, looking back up to admire Brianna’s flushed cheeks, her open mouth, her big eyes squeezed shut.

“Yeah - yes, Kam, please,” Brianna begged, voice pitching up into a whine as Kameron slid her fingers into her, hips bucking against the intrusion. “Fuck, more - I want more.”

��So bossy,” Kameron murmured, pushing a third finger in beside the first two. Brianna let out a drawn out moan at that, starting to ride Kameron’s fingers in earnest.

Kameron let Brianna do the work, pressing her lips to the other woman’s collarbone and occupying herself with leaving open-mouthed kisses along the taut skin. When she felt Brianna’s wetness dripping onto her thighs, she twisted her wrist, starting to squeeze in a fourth finger.

Brianna gasped sharply at that, eyes opening wide, thighs tensing as she tried to lift herself away. Kameron slid her spare hand down across Brianna’s cheek to settle at the base of her throat, fingers wrapping around her neck and squeezing ever so gently.

“You wanted more,” she said, her voice low. “So take it, tough girl.”

Brianna’s eyes darkened visibly, and Kameron stared right back, knowing that she’d never back away from such an obvious challenge. She squeezed Brianna’s throat again, just for a moment, loving the way the other woman’s breath caught.

Her nails digging into Kameron’s shoulders, Brianna sank down onto her fingers slowly, never once breaking eye contact. She let out a long, shuddering breath, and Kameron could feel her walls clenching and then relaxing. She squeezed her own thighs together, feeling the stickiness between them.

“So, are you gonna fuck me now, babe?” Brianna managed to ask, breathless, rotating her hips slowly. “Or are those muscles of yours just for show?”

Not bothering to reply, Kameron started to pump her fingers in and out, forearm flexing as she flicked her wrist. Brianna met every stroke, letting out little grunts of effort, her gaze trained on Kameron’s breasts.

“C’mon,” she panted, tossing her hair back and looking up to meet Kameron’s eyes once more. “Is that - fuck - is that all you’ve got?”

Narrowing her eyes, Kameron released Brianna’s neck and wrapped her arm around her waist, pulling the other woman’s hips down to force her fingers deeper. Brianna groaned, tongue poking out of the corner of her mouth.

Holding Brianna steady, Kameron increased her pace, biting down on her lower lip. The noises coming from between Brianna’s legs were filthy, her wetness dripping down Kameron’s wrist. Suddenly very aware of her own body, Kameron felt the burn starting to grow in her forearm, the sweat on the back of her neck and under her breasts, the ache in her core.

Brianna was twisting in her grasp, a mess of pants and whimpers, and Kameron pushed just a little harder, feeling Brianna’s channel shudder.

“How’s that?” she ground out, looking up just in time to see Brianna’s face contort, mouth dropping open in a soundless scream.

“Gorgeous,” Kameron breathed into the moment of silence, Brianna’s cunt rippling around her fingers.

And then, Brianna collapsed against her, hips twitching, moaning low into her neck. Kameron held her close, palm pressed to her back, fingers moving slowly inside her and helping her ride out the climax.

After another few moments, she pulled her hand away, Brianna whining weakly beside her ear at the loss.

Kameron wiped her fingers on Brianna’s thigh, and then wrapped both arms around her and ducked to kiss her shoulder, content to stay like that until Brianna came back to herself or fell asleep. The moments passed slowly, Brianna breathing softly and quietly, and Kameron realized that it might be the second option. She was slightly surprised to find that she didn’t mind that in the slightest.

This was always one of Kameron’s favorite parts, the moments just after. The other woman pressed close against her, shaky or shivering, relearning how to make her lungs work, how to open her eyes, how to put sentences together.

Brianna’s chest was resting against hers, face buried in her neck, and Kameron could feel her heartbeat slowing under her hands, breathing evening out against her skin.

She’d felt all of it before, but she didn’t think she’d ever loved it quite so much as she did now.

Lifting Brianna slightly, Kameron turned her body, repositioning herself as carefully as she could before pulling her own legs back onto the couch and laying the two of them down.

“Mmmm?” Brianna hummed, raising her head and blinking at Kameron.

“Hey there,” Kameron said softly, reaching up to brush Brianna’s hair away from her face. “You dozed off for a minute, baby.”

“Sorry,” Brianna murmured, shaking her head.

“It’s okay,” Kameron chuckled, echoing her thoughts from earlier. “I don’t mind. You can sleep.”

“But… I wanna make you come,” Brianna protested, the words coming slowly and hesitantly for the first time all night. “You’re so… so hot. Wanna eat you out.”

“There’ll be time for that in the morning,” Kameron said, a smile spreading across her face.

Brianna frowned at her, brow furrowing weakly.

“I’m fine, baby. I promise.”

Signing, Brianna gave in and let her head fall onto Kameron’s shoulder, arm winding around her waist.

“Thanks for trying to save me,” she said sleepily.

“Thanks for actually saving me,” Kameron said with a quiet laugh. “I got lucky.”

“‘M glad I met you, Kam.”

“I’m glad you made this happen,” Kameron replied. “I’m such a baby, I was too intimidated.”

Brianna chuckled, and nuzzled closer tucking her face into Kameron’s neck.

“You’re cute,” she mumbled. “I’m gonna give you my number tomorrow.”

There was a pause, and Kameron’s smile widened. She rubbed Brianna’s back gently, not having the words to reply and not feeling any particular pressure to find them. It was hot, lying close together like this, but Kameron felt too warm inside to care.

“‘M gonna be so sore tomorrow,” Brianna added after a moment.

“That’s your own fault.”

Brianna snorted, and Kameron felt her nod once. Then, she sighed, and her breathing evened out once more.

#crameron #kameron michaels #miz cracker #smut #humor #miss bianca #aquaria #asia o'hara #tw minor violence #rpdr fanfiction #s10 #lesbian au

114 notes · View notes

lightsandlostbells · 7 years

Text

SkamFr Episode 6 reaction

For some reason the read-more keeps getting removed from my long-ass posts even though I make an effort to put it in, I apologize for that.

This episode contained some really great things (Alex 💖💖!) and also made me able to articulate something about the remake that is part of why, despite having things I’ve enjoyed, I don’t feel it is that emotionally resonant. It lacks fragility.

Clip 1: Lucas gets the dirt from Emma

You know I don't have a problem with Yann being a skateboarder or whatever, that's where they're going with his character, but it low-key exasperates me because (as we just heard this week) Jonas was into skateboarding because Marlon Langeland was. Similar example, Sana played basketball because Iman Meskini plays basketball in real life. I believe Eva’s Black Swan costume was a nod to Lisa Teige being a dancer. Is Yann’s actor into skateboarding IRL? I don't know. Maybe he is. But by sticking to the original characters so slavishly, they're missing on opportunities to personalize them and play to the actors’ strengths. Like these are really simple things they could do to differentiate the characters to make it more of a personalized production.

I mean it’s totally fine and even a little charming if Yann is kind of a crappy skateboarder, lmao (I am not an expert).

I forgot how much Isak leads into this conversation with Eva, trying to get the details. But that actually makes more sense to me because in this version, Lucas just sits down, asks if everything is okay, and then Emma confesses right away. If this has been weighing on her (which it has), she could have told one of her girls, who would have been a “safer” choice to tell? Maybe not Daphne, but Manon wouldn’t have cared and wouldn’t have any reason to tell Yann - ignoring Lucas’ real motivation at this point, he is also Yann’s BFF and might feel a sense of loyalty to him. Any way you look at it, not a great person to confess to. Isak was at least leading Eva a bit and encouraging her to open up, so it makes sense that she would cave and share with him in that moment.

I never noticed before but at the beginning of the original clip you can see Isak and Eva walking together, cute.

No offense to these actors but Lisa and Tarjei are the ones from the original I miss most. For all of the social media for Lucas and Emma that makes them seem like good friends, within the clips themselves I don't really feel like they're close.

Clip 2 - girls at lunch

On the one hand, I get why they picked episodes 7 and 8 to merge, gossip travels fast and I could see these events unfolding rapidly. On the other hand, there’s a lot of really weighty material in these episodes so it’s unfortunate.

So the big thing here is obviously that Alex hooked up with a girl! I saw the post about the actress confirming her as bi, so that’s terrific. What would be great is if this was integrated into future seasons - what if Kasper was a girl??? A deeply weird girl. I would be all kinds of into it. Or just keeping up the trend of her casually talking about girls, having her chime in to correct Vilde/Daphne’s ill-advised comments about lesbians, etc.

This is also pretty big because she’s apparently out, at least to her friends? There’s not going to be a coming out season for her unless it’s for her family or something. So should they decide to do an Alex season or involve her sexuality in a future storyline, it would be from the perspective of someone who is already open and seemingly comfortable in her sexuality. I seriously hope they do some exciting stories with this piece of information.

Poor Daphne clinging to her delusions. Her enthusiasm about double dating with Emma, Alex, and Charles is so sad.

Were the jerseys in the previous episode at all? Manon being like “I can’t stand seeing you in this jersey” when it’s the first time Daphne’s worn it (though I agree, once is enough). I checked and Daphne wasn’t wearing one, she had on some cute sweaters. Did Charles have to like ... order one in her size ... and the shipping took a week ... because that was a big thing to overlook, costuming wise.

I was going to say that they could have shot the rest of the scene in the cafeteria, with Manon pointing out girls in there wearing the jerseys, but we got Manon taking Daphne by the hand so that was nice. And I guess it might be awkward for Daphne to realize this at the lunch table.

OK, Emma launching herself at Yann for a makeout session during this heartfelt moment where Manon is trying to make Daphne feel better about a boy not liking her is rather insensitive. Read the room, Emma. (I know she’s trying to alleviate her guilt. It’s still pretty WTF.)

I know that a lot of criticism has been directed at the remake sticking to closely to the original, and I’ve certainly done my share of this, but I’m really disappointed they choose to cut Vilde’s line about feeling like there was something wrong with her. It was so raw and heartbreaking and real and it’s too bad that of all the things they’ve been keeping the same, they got rid of that part. For example, the Alex and Lucas “flirting” could have been cut to make room for that line; that moment felt forced and stilted anyway, and it’s the exact thing they should be cutting if they’re having to compress the story for time.

Clip 3 - confronting Charles

I thought the whole bit about Vilde not having dignity was one of the less excusable Sana moments from S1 since it’s not directed at something Vilde did wrong or said to help her, but Alex snorting after Imane says it is probably an added sting for Daphne.

Charles is the fucking worst. I feel like he’s even worse than William at this point, tbh. He just seems smarmier and sleazier. I’m not saying the actor’s bad or anything, I just find this dude to have an extra layer of creep. William seemed kind of checked out of the Vilde confrontation, what is this interrupting my day, Charles seems more deliberately trying to twist the knife.

Uhhhh I guess it’s nice that Charles and Alex have more of a friendship and Alex can tease him about getting verbally shredded by Manon and all but he was also cool with standing there as his best bro told a girl that he fucked that she wasn’t pretty enough for him so frankly, Raptor Alex is the worst, too.

I will go into Manon at the end but this moment was fine, it wasn’t my favorite thing she did this episode but I thought she showed more fire this week than in previous ones.

I also missed the moment where Vilde called Sana out on throwing water in Ingrid‘s face and Sana replies that she had a good reason for that because it was a little reminder of that incident and foreshadowing to the reveal of why she did it. I get why they cut it but it might’ve been nice since I’ve seen more divided opinions on Imane and whether, in making Daphne less offensive and less willing to speak up for herself, they’ve made Imane seem unnecessarily rude.

But also, in watching the original clip, I think Vilde was inspired or bolstered by Sana’s comments not to confront William (who are you to tell me what to do, you just put me down, you’re telling me not to ruin things when you also caused a scene) and Noora‘s encouragement (Noora had previously comforted her and given her the idea to confront him).

Clip 4 - The fight

Depending on your POV, the fourth wall breakage about a Norwegian tv show was either groan-worthy or cute. I thought it was sweet.

What kind of books do you think Daphne reads? I assume, much like Vilde, she reads exclusively The Secret, The Game and other self-help/relationship manuals.

I also liked Emma calling Manon “Booba” and giving her that little shoulder squeeze.

You know I never realized quite how much this would’ve been embarrassing for Vilde. Not just because of what William said, but because that was supposed to be her moment. Confronting William was supposed to be her proving to be a badass. Instead William cruelly put her down in public, and instead it was Noora who got to be the badass. You know, Noora, who in Vilde’s eyes is prettier, thinner, and cooler than she is, and who William instantly has an attraction to (not that Vilde got to see this). Vilde’s words didn’t land a blow to William at all, but Noora managed to leave William speechless. He didn’t put Noora down, it was Noora he was impressed with. So even when the girls are like good job, Noora, about this epic moment that Vilde didn’t see because she had to walk off in shame and hurt, Vilde’s empowering moment was snatched away from her. Ouch.

Manon was a boss in this fight. I kind of hate the term “mama bear” but that’s what came to mind here.

The fight itself went on for too long, Manon’s excellence aside. It also made me think that a physical fight inside the school would be a more serious deal than a fight outside of it, in the sense that teachers/adults are definitely going to notice. IDK how French school works but at my high school everyone involved would be hauled off to the principal’s office right away.

Clip 5 - Emma on the steps

The bit with Emma being called a whore on Facebook - I wouldn’t say that’s a NICE touch, but it adds to the aspect of social media being used for bullying.

Yeah Ingrid is straight up intimidating. Manon is like a little mouse beside her. But lmao at Sarah immediately folding when Manon stood up.

I did like Ingrid stepping in front of Sarah. That’s her girl.

THEIR INSTAGRAM POSTS ARE SO DRAMATIC. JESUS.

Clip 6 - Manon comforting Emma

The scene was cute, especially Emma starting to sing along.

I legit do not care what anyone ships but I’m so ????? at how people could ship Manon and Charles at this point except by already being a Noorhelm fan and having the knowledge that they are a future couple. Because like ... if you were watching this not having seen the original show, Charles’ role has to been to be a jerk to a girl he slept with and spoil this lovely moment between two friends in order to deliver some rapey as fuck dialogue about how No is a Yes in waiting. WTF. I don’t want to get into the discourse but he is deeply creepy here!

I would not be surprised if Blurred Lines is Charles’ cheer-up song of choice.

I kind of laughed about Manon watching House of Cards because isn’t House of Cards considered a prestige show, Spacey scandal aside? I watched several seasons of it; although it is like a political soap opera, I thought it was supposed to be kind of an award bait. It doesn’t seem that weird that Manon would watch it even if she’s not a TV person, lol. But maybe it is, I don’t know! I thought Suits was more of a sort of guilty pleasure procedural but I’ve never seen that show, so maybe my perception is all wrong.

Clip 7 - Daphne’s extraordinary meeting

Alex’s hair is indeed very pretty. Nice job.

Soooo this scene.

In the original, while Vilde tells the story about Ingrid and Jonas, the camera stays on a close-up of Eva’s miserable, guilty face while memories of what happened flash by in her mind. In the remake the camera focuses a lot on Daphne as she’s telling the story, with some shots of the group, and only cuts to Emma for a few short moments. The result is that this scene is much less emotionally effective. Yes, I already know the story, I know the twist, perhaps that matters. But I’m not deep in Emma’s pain. You really feel it with Eva, how her past is coming back to haunt her and how her mistakes are being exposed in front of her new friends against her will, and she probably feels like she deserves it. When I watched the original scene, I felt gutted for her. Here the emphasis is on Daphne’s judgmental face as she tells a story that she’s not personally involved in. That creates an emotional disconnect. This is the moment that should make us understand Eva’s behavior over the season even further, this is the moment that should explain the mysterious feud with Ingrid, this is a defining moment for Emma’s character and it’s not hers.

I do like that Daphne seem almost like she’s appealing to Manon by saying that people should know not to steal boyfriends, because that is the kind of thing that feminist Manon would be strictly against. Although obviously the attempt backfired.

Also lol at them working on the party “for months” it’s been one month since you even formed the squad! Though I do think it’s implied Daphne has been working on it for longer, and that she doesn’t want her pet project to be ruined.

The bit about Imane saying you stand for your friends “even when they don’t deserve it" was added from what I can tell; I think that’s a decent part though it might kind of be unnecessary, like sometimes less is more, the point is still there even without it, we get that Daphne just messed up. It’s not a huge sin or anything but there are a few occasions where I think the dialogue has been too on the nose (like Yann being all WOW SO MUCH TRUST BETWEEN US right after Emma cheated).

I do like Alex comforting Emma. I think Alex is a little more OK with confrontation then Chris was. Chris was a little flustered and didn’t know quite how to respond in the original, and we later saw that sometimes she struggled with how to be there for her friends, and Alex seems a little more chill with open displays of supporting her friends. She’s a very chill character in general.

Clip 8 - Yann and Emma in the skatepark

Time to talk about fragility.

When I think of Skam at its best, that is something which comes to mind. Not fragility of storytelling, but fragility in its emotions. Stripping away all the bullshit that you encounter in everyday life that leads you to put on a mask and say hollow words, as well as cutting out all the bullshit that you see in 90% of teen dramas and TV shows that go for noise and overblown, nonsensical emotions in order to produce drama, and just letting the characters say something real to each other. It’s not just about characters being sad, but being vulnerable. To be vulnerable means you can be easily broken. Fragile.

Not just Noora in the wake of her assault, but Noora telling Vilde about the nutritional benefits of potatoes as a way of talking about Vilde’s eating disorder, because to address the subject outright is too much. Not just Isak falling to the ground in tears, but Isak trying to talk around and delay his coming out to Jonas, turning it into a guessing game, because if Jonas rejects him or says the wrong thing, it would shatter him. Not just Sana crying alone in her room, but Sana writing a text to her friends explaining how much she feels she doesn’t fit in and asking her friends to forgive her.

And I heavily associate that concept with Eva’s season in particular. Every moment with her feels like we are with someone whose vulnerability is right there on the surface. Her old friends now hate her, her boyfriend seems to be keeping secrets from her, she’s struggling in school, her mom isn’t there and doesn’t know about her life, she just doesn’t know who she is. Think about how delicate a moment is the end of episode 2, when Eva is upset and can hear the boys laughing from another room, not caring, and she sees that Noora has accepted her friend request. A tiny, tiny gesture like that feels enormous. This really mundane thing because powerful because the show has demonstrated how Eva’s fragility, how much this friend request means to her.

The best scenes of Skam France, IMO, and the aspect has been working for me personally, is Daphne. And in a lot of ways, that is because she is fragile. We can see her hurt coming a mile away even if we hadn’t seen S1 before - because we can tell how much Charles means to her and how she is nothing to him. She is really, really fucking vulnerable when she puts herself out there for someone to love only to get rejected. She is vulnerable when she sends Charles a topless picture and when she tries to win back his attention. She is vulnerable when she tries to stand up for herself only to get put in her place. The show has done a good job with the actress and with demonstrating that raw, realistic pain.

Where I don’t feel that fragility is with Emma. Or Yann. Who knows if we’ll feel it with Lucas, with his upcoming parental woes and confession to Emma. But Emma is the focus of the season, and that’s a problem.

Some of it is in the acting, personally, and some of it is the writing. I know a lot of people like Emma and even prefer her to Eva because of her self-confidence, but I’m not a big fan and I think part of it is that her attitude and essence don’t work as well with the material. Like it feels less like a teenage girl having all her insecurities and mistakes bared. Again, it’s not just about Emma being sad. We have seen her sad. I don’t find her as fragile.

Another example from this episode: not focusing on Emma when hearing the true story of what happened with Ingrid. Eva’s vulnerability was the focus of that scene. We could not get away from her haunted face as she had to relive her past regrets. We missed a chance to follow how much the Ingrid incident has broken Emma.

Another non-Emma example: omitting Vilde’s line about feeling something is wrong with her and knowing she shouldn’t feel that way, an incredibly raw, wounded line we didn’t hear from Daphne.

There are several other key scenes where I think some aspect of the production has undermined a potentially vulnerable moment - what sometimes seems like the overuse of music, condensed conversations with less room for silences to speak for themselves, camera work that keeps us at a distance. Also some times where it has worked, too, I’m not saying there are no emotional moments like this, and I’m not saying that it needs to follow the original in these exact ways. But it’s a repeat issue.

This is not to say every character has to be troubled and vulnerable, by the way. But - this is a show about being young and dealing with problems. Vulnerability is vital in our ability to empathize with these characters. These are kids getting their first taste of adult problems and not knowing how to deal with them, they should be fragile. Almost all of the best coming of age films, books, and TV shows excel at depicting vulnerability. It doesn’t matter whether it’s French or Norwegian, youthful fragility is universal (and if not then why the fuck are you making a show about teenagers and their feelings).

Anyway, this scene.

This is an angry conversation. Sure I know Yann is upset. But I don’t feel that personal fragility coming from him. I have seen it before at time - like when Emma came over while he was playing video games with the boys, she made to leave, and he asked her several times to stay. Other times we’ve missed that vulnerability from him - for instance, when Jonas asked if Eva wanted a break, he genuinely seemed kind of fearful that she would say yes. When Yann asked Emma, he was throwing it in her face, and didn’t really seem afraid until she walked away and he gave her a dramatic speech.

Like Yann just skateboards up to her and doesn’t have much patience for what she says. He seems pissed. And hey, maybe that is how he expresses vulnerability, you could certainly make a case for it. But the acting and directing didn’t really make me feel it at all. It just feels like he’s angry (understandably).

However, Yann is also such a jackass here, jeeeeez. Obviously I can’t know for sure because I don’t speak French, but even his tone of voice to me sounds like he’s making fun of her. And of course he has to go on about her stupid parties and her friends, when I think Jonas seemed to mostly go for the idea that she doesn’t know what she wants. It wasn’t that Eva’s friends were dumb, it was that she changed who she was and what she wanted based on who she was with. But Yann seems to be mocking her specifically for trying to throw those parties and making fun of her friends. He's really aggravating and almost seems to resent that she’s no longer fitting into the image of what he wants his girlfriend to be. I do think Jonas did say something that cut Eva to the bone, but I don’t think he was trying to make fun of her. He was angry but he did seem vulnerable himself, not as much as Eva, but it was evident.

I do think Emma is being vulnerable here, moreso than we’ve seen her in some other scenes, but overall she doesn’t really have that vibe for me. It’s probably more effective for people who are fans of her character.

The last shot of Yann smashing his skateboard into the ground is a dramatic TV moment. The last shot of Eva sitting by herself, tiny against the skate park murals, is a fragile moment.

General Comments:

This was a really big week for Manon. The scenes were a little hit and miss for me. I think Manon lacks the withering disdain to really nail scenes like telling off Charles, but is stronger when she’s in full on angry protector mode, like during the fight or standing up to Sarah and Ingrid. She did finally make a much stronger impression with all of her big moments.

The moments where Alex ogles Lucas don’t really work for me and I wish they’d be cut to make room for other things, but you know how it could work? If Alex and Lucas form some kind of friendship later on, gay dude/bi girl solidarity.

There was a lot of social media this week after the big events, like Manon telling off Charles, the fight, etc. and it was like a flurry of vagueposting and flinging shade all over the place. I kinda feel like it’s too much, lmao? But I also kinda think teenagers are overly dramatic on Instagram.

Because they combined episodes seven and eight, several scenes are missing from the original, for example Jonas and Eva in her bedroom while Eva texts P-Chris, Eva and Isak in her room after Jonas finds out, and Eva arguing with her mom. It’s possible some of these moments like the Isak or mom scenes could come in later, like I guess they could have Emma and Lucas hugging it out this week. I did miss that scene because it was an important moment for their friendship (also fragile...) and more painful when we learned what Isak did. I’m not feeling the friendship between Lucas and Emma that much on screen and that could have helped. However, I do understand why these where the scenes they cut.

Personally I think having time limits to the French episodes is a strong case for doing more comprehensive rewrites, but blah blah it’s in the contract blah blah.

I was pretty nitpicky this time around but it was not a bad episode, there was a lot going on.

I sure hope someone did a parody of Yann spiking his skateboard to this song.

#skamfr reactions

22 notes · View notes

vulva-o-queef · 6 years

Text

@hestiaq (making a new post because I don’t want to keep reblogging a long threat)

I’m really sorry for what you were put through. I sincerely hope you’re in a better situation now and doing okay. That’s horrific.

I remember the Ted Bundy bit you’re talking about- and she’s…. honestly quite right? If enough men have NPD/ASPD a few of them are going to seem intelligible, I think. I don’t really understand what you’re saying about Ted Bundy- if it’s tongue in cheek or not.

Okay, like I said, I haven’t seen this post she made. necromancerdoll just said that larps said sociopaths/psychopaths “can’t perform well in society/function with others.” I know aspd and being a sociopath are often considered the same thing, and I know a lot of them are pretty transparent assholes. Psychopathy isn’t a formal diagnosis at all, but criminal psychologists do use the term, and there’s a pretty solid consensus on what it means. Some people say psychopaths are a subset of sociopaths, and other people say it’s a similar but distinct thing, but in either case, one of the main characteristics of a psychopath (which a sociopath doesn’t, or doesn’t always have) is that they’re smooth and charming, and they use those traits to manipulate others.

My comment about Ted Bundy was sarcastic (and probably not in very good faith, but also wasn’t really related to the main point of all this), because saying psychopaths “can’t perform well in society/function with others” is the opposite of the truth. Ted Bundy was charming, socially adept, approachable, and likable, which was exactly how he managed to lure in many of his victims. He would put on a fake cast and ask women to help him get things into his car, which is what that scene from silence of the lambs is based on. Larps might be totally aware of all that and just phrased something too broadly. The only way it would be relevant to the rest of what I’m saying is, if she really meant to say that psychopaths are socially inept, it would be another example of how she tries to speak as an authority on mental disorders she doesn’t understand. Mostly I was just poking fun.

Women are over-diagnosed. But I don’t understand how Larps pointing out shitty behavior is the same as “diagnosing everyone”. Also, she’s talked about how borderline personality is over-diagnosed and often ascribed to women who are dealing with trauma. She’s also not talking about it from a “I don’t personally like them” only- “these people” are people who are cruel and vicious and play victim when called out on their cruel vicious behavior.

Clearly, you and I interpret the things she says about bpd and ‘cluster b’ in general very differently. For one, diagnosing anyone over the internet is absurd. In my first response to her, I did agree that she has made some good points, mostly about the link between autogynephilia and narcissism. But that’s about noticing an overarching theme within a specific population, and there’s already a decent amount of academic writing about that link. Case studies done by real psychologists. Actual studies done with controls and statistics and so on. And even with stuff like fucking “trans lesbian” dating profiles that larps points out herself, there is some solid evidence there due to the sheer repetition of entitled attitudes, fetishism, etc, the list goes on. My issue is with the way she thinks she understands BPD when she clearly doesn’t, how she applies “cluster b” or bpd to an awful lot of people, largely young ‘transmen’ or radfems she doesn’t like, and how whenever anyone she’s put down for having BPD tells her to cut it out, or tells her that she’s wrong about them, she dismisses anything they have to say by citing “people with bpd are insane,” or telling them they’re being irrational due to their disorder. Basically she’s using it as a shield to avoid being held accountable for the things she says. “Anyone who’s telling me borderline people aren’t irrational is only saying that because they’re borderline, and therefore they’re irrational!” I’m not saying she’s diagnosing “everyone.” And regarding transmen specifically, there are a lot of psychological factors involved in that situation, and for someone who’s so vocal about the cultlike, exploitative, backwards nature of the trans movement, you’d think she would understand how absurd and frankly just plain egotistical it is to think she can simplify all of those psychological factors and dynamics down to “cluster b.” Again - remember that she’s talking about people she’s never met in her life, usually judging from one blog description, a handful of posts, or sometimes nothing more than a fucking selfie.

Even as a younger girl with supposed “BPD” (who even identified with the label)- I wouldn’t have found this stuff offensive, and if it did (which I might have, and sometimes still do)- it’s really that easy to log off or go outside.

That’s good for you, and I respect your perspective. And you’re right, I could just log off and ignore what larps is saying. You can say that about anything anyone says on the internet, and technically it’s true. But I didn’t. The things she’s saying are ignorant, I find them personally hurtful, and I think she’s spreading misinformation, harmful stereotypes, and regressive thinking. I see that she’s saying dehumanizing and belittling things to women on this site who deserve respect, and probably worst of all, I see that there are a lot of people who look up to her, ask her for advice, sometimes idolize her a bit, and many of them will believe pretty much anything she says. She’s feeding them bullshit and some really vile ideas about mental health stigma, and how people with certain disorders (mainly BPD) deserve to be treated. I don’t think she’s the devil incarnate, and I don’t think she’s out here ruining lives and destroying families. I think she’s an asshole with an inflated sense of her own insight and knowledge, and I decided to say something. I could have logged off, but in this case, I didn’t. That’s all.

...I don’t understand how Larps memeing on a Tumblr blog and often posting insightful ideas about personality disorders is “insulting, ignorant, and dehumanizing”.

Yeah I don’t know what you consider “insightful,” but posting the definition of “insane” and copy-pasting a list of bpd symptoms and saying “see? these people are insane,” and tagging her response to my post with #have u ever noticed how all of these people have personality disorders (callback to “anyone who’s telling me borderline people aren’t irrational is only saying that because they’re borderline, and therefore they’re irrational!”) ...doesn’t quite cut it in my book.

She doesn’t bring up cluster b whenever she “feels” someone is acting unreasonable and dramatic- they… are unreasonable and dramatic- at least in whatever context, and people don’t have to dig deep to see who someone really is to be able to just say “no that’s insane, bye”.

Mmmm... I realize you see the situation differently from me, but am I acting insane? I mean, at worst, I’m making the undeniably blunt way she talks to people into something bigger than it needs to be. And yeah, I know... classic cluster b, amiright? But even if that’s the case, even if I’m misinterpreting her views, surely you can see where I’m coming from. And there are quite a few people who have the same objections that I do (mostly radfems, radfem adjacent women, terves, etc.). When she wrote that tag #have u ever noticed how all of these people have personality disorders, isn’t it clear that she was referring to me, as well as the rest of the radfemmish women who have been speaking against this behavior from her lately? Isn’t she making an assumption that I have a personality disorder (which I do not)?

Do you really think my objection to the way larps talks about bpd is an indication that I have a personality disorder, and that I’m insane? Unreasonable at worst. But yes, she is absolutely using the excuse that those who object to her saying borderline people are irrational are saying so because they’re borderline/irrational. And like I said, I’m hardly the only example of her saying things like this. Someone just reblogged the original post of all of this and said #I just blocked larps bcuz shes been reblogging random old posts from me calling me a cluster b as bait #as far as I know I’m the only quote on quote crazy bihet that doesn’t have a pd? Someone else wrote #I really looked up to larps hence I’m so torn about this #if I didn’t believe she was a smart and decent well meaning person I wouldn’t care. That’s just on that particular post, within the last few hours.

People with personality disorders are diagnosed because they’re anti social and cause harm to those they “love”/interact with and the cluster b community (that I hung around) spend most of their time groveling in misery- despite often constructing their own fantastical narrative of people horrifically abusing them and demanding to be coddled for every emotion.

Some of them, yeah. Not all of them, and not enough to justify making assumptions about people you’ve never met.

What I mean is- the pain that they’re feeling is an offense to ego a LOT of the time. And other’s shouldn’t have to walk around eggshells to make sure that they don’t injure others egos.

Agreed.

Like it’s not real, rudfems don’t enable or contribute to violence against women. None of these women, no matter how mean they are, contributed to the pain I experienced in childhood for being called BPD- actually it was always men and handmaidens.

I didn’t accuse larps, or any other ‘rudefem’ of contributing to violence against women. I know that men were the reason ‘hysteria’ could be diagnosed in the past, and I know that men are the reason bpd is being overdiagnosed in women today. And I’m honestly not even trying to say larps is being misogynistic to the women she says this stuff to (though re-reading, I realize it could easily sound that way). Misogyny or not, dismissing someone’s perfectly measured, reasonable objection as irrational just because they have a bpd diagnosis - which in several cases, dr. larps diagnosed all by herself - is unacceptable, is the same pattern and circular justification used on ‘hysterical’ women in the past, and is particularly bad because, as we agree, bpd is too often being diagnosed as the new version of hysteria. She’s re-enforcing age-old stereotypes about mental illness, and she’s buying into it so completely that she really believes that borderline people are so unreliable that she knows what’s going on in their heads better than they do. Hence saying that borderline people objecting to her backwards stereotyping are doing so out of a kneejerk reaction to a damaged ego, rather than because they know what she’s saying is false.

Also - she isn’t talking about everyone with “diagnosed” BPD.

If that’s what she means, then she’s the one who needs to say it, not you. Again, I respect that you have a different view of this, and I understand your perspective, I can’t believe what others say about her intentions and supposed read-between-the-lines distinctions, when she doesn’t say it herself, and the things she says and the way she acts do not communicate what you’re saying about her.

Meaning, there’s a distinction between people who have been diagnosed and are suffering, and people who have been diagnosed (or not) and are cruel and have a total lack of insight and disregard for other people.

Mental health is complicated. You can’t divide people with bpd into two clean categories like that. That’s not how it works. And you CERTAINLY can’t lump people into the “bad” category simply because they don’t like how you talk about their disorder. You can’t see someone objecting to what you’re saying and assume that YOU know that they’re coming from a “total lack of insight.” People are not psychic. Larps is using the fact that some people with pds have a lack of self-awareness to dodge accountability when it’s convenient for her. It’s complete circular logic - something you would think she would be above, no? “they’re irrational, and when they complain about me calling them irrational, I can shut them down by saying that any complaint they make is irrational.” I know I keep saying this, but it’s true. In my first comment, I pointed out that this is her pattern, and what was her response? hashtag have u ever noticed how all these people have personality disorders. fucking exactly what I said her response would be, because that’s the only excuse she has.

And yes, insight is a qualifying factor that “””exonerates”””” (quite a loaded word in this context????) someone from being “really” BPD. The thing about BPD is that they will not (or cannot) change- like it’s not a fixed part of your personality, and if it is- you deserve to be called out, and if it isn’t and you still behave like that… you deserve to be called out, still.

Again, no. If this is the case, then we need to make a second definition to separate “REALLY bpd” from “sorta bpd,” since currently they both meet the same diagnostic criteria. It’s not up to you, or larps, to create definitive new categories of mental illness.

I went from being told I had “borderline tendencies” to being diagnosed with full BPD, to basically nothing at all, because I became aware of those patterns, learned how to be objective about my thoughts and emotions, and practiced resisting them to the point where they only show up if I’m already in a really bad state. I don’t consider myself to have - or to have had - a personality disorder, because I’ve almost completely gotten rid of those mental reactions. But I know people who do have BPD, who are self aware, who are trying the same things I did, but the difference is that even though they now have the tools to keep them in check, those mental and emotional reactions are still present for them, and likely always will be. To say they don’t REALLY have bpd because they’re able to control it is frankly insulting. “If you’ve been able to improve it through treatment, you never really had it in the first place.” I know that’s not how you meant it, but that’s what it boils down to.

BPD is not defined by a lack of self-awareness. It’s a pattern of ingrained emotional and mental reactions (and, subsequently, behaviors). These often develop as a method of self defense against external abuse. Or sometimes there’s no abuse and it’s there anyways. The cause isn’t always clear. But the criteria calling these symptoms “pervasive” doesn’t mean the individual is unaware of them. People who know they have bpd, and who are working on treating their bpd still have bpd.

“...deserve to be called out”... it’s not larps’ business to “call someone out” for having bpd. She can call someone out for acting like a shithead, but simply having bpd is not a flaw that needs to be criticized. Your phrasing makes it seem like that’s what you’re saying, and although I’m pretty sure that’s not what you meant, that’s what larps seems to think.

Not only are neither you nor larps qualified to determine the “category” of bpd that people on the internet who you’ve never met fall into, but even IF that’s how she sees it, then, again, she needs to say that herself, and she needs to reflect that view in the way she treats people.

But to conclude, she really does make that explicitly clear that she doesn’t think everyone with BPD is a “screeching, manipulative, hysteric”.

Where

You made a bunch of excuses for her and I still have no reason to believe any of it is true

However, I’m mostly speaking for myself here because I’ve been hanging around tungle for too long and I mostly want to say that this all doesn’t really matter. Like, so many feminists on here ramble on about “but what about bpd women who get misdiagnosed?” yeah I didn’t face brutality at the hands of snarky women on the internet. These are not the people that even enabled the violence that me or many other women with trauma face.

Again, I didn’t say that. I don’t think she’s destroying lives either, I was just frustrated, saw that many other women are frustrated about her too, and I felt like saying something, so I did. That is the extent of my motivations here. I do think that she is spreading harmful stereotypes and misinformation, but I’m under no delusion that she is causing damage on a massive scale. She is, however, just one more raindrop in the proverbial ocean of mental health stigma. Insignificant as a single drop may be, surely it’s no less significant than any of those people with bpd whose bad behavior you say should be called out. If it’s larps’ business to call them out, then it’s just as much my business to call her out.

It’s not up to her and other women like her to clarify every single thing they say- people DO generalize and we should be able to communicate without having to specify for everyone.

I’m not asking her to clarify “every single thing” she says, I’m asking her to stop acting like a shithead, labeling people she’s never met, acting like she’s an authority on personality disorders, and using her actually wildly skewed perception of these disorders which is steeped in regressive, harmful, and demeaning stigma and stereotypes about mental illness in order to manipulate her way out of being held accountable for any of it. I’m not telling her to stop generalizing for the purpose of communication, I’m asking her to stop making inaccurate generalizations based on stereotypes, and to stop using “cluster b” as a catch-all for bad behavior. Just because someone is a shithead, or unreasonable, or overdramatic, doesn’t make them borderline, and it’s insulting to the people with bpd who are truly good people, who also have to deal with their disorder being an internet trend for self-dx’ers to milk sympathy and excuse their abusive behavior (sounds just like what larps would diagnose as cluster b, I know, but it turns out that many people who don’t have bpd exhibit these traits as well), deal with shitty treatment from healthcare providers who read the diagnosis and think they know everything about you before you even walk in the door (back when I had the ‘full bpd’ diagnosis, a therapist said to my face that people with bpd were considered ‘used goods,’ and my current psychiatrist treats me with an absurd and totally unjustified level of suspicion), deal with the massively pervasive stereotypes everyone else holds about bpd (ranging from ‘serial killer’ to ‘used goods’ to ‘fake trend on the internet to get attention’), as well as dealing with - oh yeah - the actual fucking disorder, as well as often comorbid cases of PTSD, depression, anxiety, bipolar, etc.

I’m just saying, it would be a lot more effective and hurt a lot less people you supposedly didn’t mean to target if you just called out the actual behavior instead of “calling out” a disorder. Additionally, I’m pretty sure that people with bpd who do lack self awareness are far more likely to respond to direct criticisms of their behavioral patterns than they are to respond to the label of bpd being “called out.” They’d just see the latter as more fuel for self-pity. It’s a little harder to justify being the victim of someone saying “hey stop being abusive.”

And if that’s not enough reasons for you, consider: people who have shitty behaviors who don’t have a cluster b disorder (yes, larps, they exist) are just gonna hear criticisms of a disorder they don’t have and brush it right off. Call out the actual behavior, and there’s a chance they might recognize it in themselves. It’s like a quadruple win.

A hallmark of bpd/npd/aspd/hpd is having no insight into that, that people say shit, and you take what you can and leave it-her, or me, or anyone else mincing that up….. doesn’t help bpd women live in a world where nobody is going to mince anything up ever. It did not help me when people coddled me, and I intuitively knew that and was deeply frustrated with it.

You’re right that it doesn’t help to have people make excuses for you or ‘coddle’ you. But not being unfair and pushing harmful stigma is not the same thing as “coddling.” Nor is “not mincing” words the same thing as saying things that are untrue, unfair, dismissive, and insulting. Much like Trump saying blatantly racist things is NOT “just telling it like it is.” (and no I’m not comparing you or larps to trump or calling anyone racist. except trump)

Many of the women who have ‘spoken up’ about larps on tungle, I’ve seen on other mediums (fb, wordpress) and they’re often just blatantly manipulative

Really? Am I being blatantly manipulative? Or insane? And, to reiterate, is what I’ve said on her post enough for her to assume that I - and anyone else raising these issues with her - ALL have personality disorders? Is it justification for her to say that I’m “glorifying” ASPD/BPD?

and will never have any insight to the fact that all of this is really a non-issue

I gave you several examples above, and here's your treasure trove:

https://larpsandtherealgirl.tumblr.com/search/cluster%20b

Notice how she loves agreeing with everyone saying they’ve been abused by someone with a cluster b disorder, or otherwise says something negative about a person/people with a cluster b disorder, makes sweeping generalizations and basically uses “cluster b” with the same tone that you would call someone an asshole - that is to say, using the same logical standards of “you said some shit I thought was rude, so I think you’re an asshole & I’m going to call you one” when talking about psychological medical diagnoses?

Yeah, occasionally she claims she’s only talking about The Bad Ones, but that’s a pretty thin excuse when 99% of the time you make no attempt to differentiate, and post things like screenshotted symptoms (which - if the “good ones” with that disorder actually have that disorder - would apply to the “good ones” too) with captions like “these people are insane.”

Again, I realize you see the things she says very differently from me, but surely you can see where I’m coming from. And I would hope that you can see that my having this perspective does not justify saying I have a personality disorder, that I am insane, or that I am “glorifying” ASPD and NPD. I would hope that the similar shit she’s said about several other women who said things similar to what I said would also strike you as unjustified. You can make excuses that she wasn’t literally diagnosing me with a personality disorder, but you can’t make that excuse every single time she says something like this.

but instead “leave radical feminism because it’s so full of mean lesbian separatists” and make huge texts about it everywhere else and how rfeminism is a cult.

Okay... this is an entirely separate and irrelevant subject and I’m not sure why you’re bringing it up. I mean it sounds like you’re saying “people who don’t like being told they’re insane are just butthurt kek” which I really hope is not what you’re saying. I’m pretty sure there are plenty of radical women who would object to being called insane and having their opinions dismissed because of a mental health diagnosis, who would raise their objections and still believe in their politics, probably due to the fact that - in this context - those things have virtually nothing to do with one another.

My point is- she’s not just saying ppl who criticize her have bpd- they often do because people with personality disorders come out of the woodwork to be hideously angry at anyone who calls them abusive or “wrong” and “bad” (whatever that means at any given moment).

In summary: I appreciate and respect that you interpret the things larps says in a very different way, and I’m not trying to tell you that you should be hurt or anything like that. But I can’t accept what I see as excuses that you’re making for her, since she doesn’t offer any of those explanations herself, and I don’t see any evidence of the intentions you’re attributing to her, in her own words or behavior.

At the end of the day, larps is the only person who can speak for larps’ intentions (much like the people whose criticisms larps deflects by claiming they’re motivated by irrational emotion and a threatened victim complex SHOULD be the only ones who can speak for their intentions).

And at the end of the day, larps didn’t show anything but disrespect and a total unwillingness to even consider that the way she speaks to, and treats, people with bpd and people who criticize her portrayal and internet-diagnosing of bpd, might not be 100% faultless.

At the end of the day, larps read what I had to say about her dismissive attitude and manipulative, circular justification for avoiding accountability. Her response was to double down on calling people with borderline “insane,” and double down on her own belief that googling a list of symptoms makes her an expert on psychology, as well as an expert on the thoughts in other peoples’ heads. She used the exact circular, dismissive excuse I was calling out, yet again said that the people criticizing her were all doing so because of their - well “our,” I should say, since she diagnosed me - personality disorders, rather than their actual thoughts, opinions, and perfectly reasonable objections. And then she answered a bunch of messages laughing about how crazy and terrible “cluster b”s are. No, she didn’t literally say “EVERY SINGLE PERSON with bpd is like this,” but come on. She’s not the only person who can recognize patterns of behavior.

#long post

4 notes · View notes

ohtinylove · 7 years

Text

Femslash week day 1 and 3: Modern Fake Dating

Happy femslash week! This works for both day 1 and day 3. It’s focused on Rose/Rey but Jess/Kare and Finn/Poe are in there too! I hope you enjoy 💕

(Read on Ao3)

Jess cringes, covering her face in her hands as Kare tells the story of how Jess first confessed she had feelings for her. “That’s okay honey I think they’ve heard enough-” “-and that’s when she started crying. Like ugly sobbing. I didn’t think she would remember any of it in the morning, but when she woke up to my famous post-party breakfast, she straight up said ‘I meant what I said last night.’ which is so embarrassing because you obviously can’t have been that drunk then. I can’t believe we’re dating now.” “That’s so unfair! And anyway your breakfast is like a actual heaven, I would have said anything to keep you around.” “I’m pretty sure anyone with enough whip cream and pre-made pancake batter can do what Kare does, but you can keep telling people that if you want Jess,” says Poe. Everyone laughs while Kare dramatically raises a hand to her chest, her mouth gaping wide in mock offense. “Well, guess you won’t be getting any tomorrow morning.” “My house, my pancakes,” Poe says with a shrug. They were late into the evening of one of Poe’s get together parties, he and Finn cuddling together on a sofa made for one person, Jess and Kare with her long legs settled on his large couch, and Rey on the the carpet with Poe’s corgi puppy, Bee, curled up in her lap. Most of the drinks were emptied, sitting on the glass coffee table and scattered around the living room. “Hey do you know what is so unfair? Rey doesn’t have anyone here to tell embarrassing stories about her.” says Jess, pointing at her accusingly.

“I can make some up.” says Poe. “I once saw Rey kiss a cow. Straight on the lips, with tongue.” “Poe!” Rey exclaims, while Jess and Kare giggle, Finn snorting loudly into his drink causing everyone to laugh even louder. “Guys. Guys, guys. This isn’t fair to Rey. She’s all alone, we have to support her. She doesn’t have what we have,” Finn manages to get out. “Rey. Rey. I’m sorry my boyfriend is a big bully.” “Thank you, Finn.” Rey says while Poe makes a pouty face. “Sorry Rey. I mean, I guess it’s not fair to pick on you. I mean who are you going to complain to when you go home?” “Wait, guys, she has no one to complain to, so that means we can pick on her as much as we want,” Jess says with a wink. Though she knows it is all in good fun, Rey feels herself getting more and more irritated at their teasing. “I think Rey is the sweetest person. In this world.” Finn thinks for a minute. “Well, I haven’t really met everyone in the world, but…” he trails off as he seems to pass out on Poe’s shoulder. “How hasn’t the sweetest girl, maybe in the world, found a girlfriend, and Jess, who leaves her dishes in the sink and her dirty clothes on the ground, have one. Love isn’t real.” says Kare. “Maybe she has a dark side that we don’t see. Maybe her breath stinks.” said Jess. That was enough for Rey. Maybe it was the alcohol, maybe she was a bit more jealous of her friends happiness than she let herself admit, maybe she was tired of being single all the time, and maybe this time her friends had hit a nerve that she hadn’t even told them was exposed as she stung sharply from their harmless comments. And maybe, she was more than a little competitive. “Well, maybe I am seeing someone.” All eyes turn to Rey in surprise. Even Finn raises his head and squints at her. “Who Rey? Why don’t we know about this?” Jess asks suspiciously. This was a problem. Because Rey had not, in fact, being seeing anyone. Hell, there was barely anyone who she saw who wasn’t the people in this room. “Why should I tell you?” Rey says to buy herself more time. “Oh come on Rey, we’re your friends! You have to tell us!” says Kare. “Yeah Rey, we’re sorry. Please, we’re all dying to know,” says Poe. “Her name is Rose.” Nice. Rey had really messed up this time. Rose was most definitely not the name of her girlfriend. I mean, not that Rey hadn’t thought about how nice that would be. Holding her hand, kissing her forehead, stuff like that. But worst of all- “Rey, isn’t that your new roommate? That you’ve had for like, two weeks, tops.” Kare says. “It’s been three weeks, and yes, we have been getting along well. Really well, actually.” “Rey you sly dog!” Poe says with a grin growing on his face. “Do you know what this calls for?” “A lie detector test?” says Jess. “Do tell, Poe,” says Kare, brushing off Jess’ comment. “A triple date! You, Jess, me, Finn, and Rey and her girl! There’s the fall fair down by the beach all week, it’s perfect.” Rey thinks to decline, but with Jess still scrutinizing her so very closely, she says,”I’m sure Rose would love to come.” “Then it’s a date!” says Poe, beaming at his successful plan. “It’s a date,” Rey says plastering a smile on her face. She really messed up this time.

*****

“I’d love to come to the fair!” Rose says, beaming with enthusiasm. “I was actually going to ask you because I still don’t really know a lot of people around here, so that’s awesome.” At least she’s excited. “Well, actually, there’s more.” “Oh?” Rose seems unconcerned by this and turns back to put some pasta in the water which had just reached a boil. Rey is silent for a minute, unsure of how to explain that she had lied to her friends and that she needed Rose’s help to continue lying to her friends without seeming like a complete scumbag. “Well, something I said, maybe, may have put them under the impression that you were coming as my girlfriend?” Rose turns back around, spoon in hand and an eyebrow arching in surprise. “Oh?” Rey takes this as encouragement and explains how she had arrived at this mess. Rose continues about the kitchen during her story getting some sauce ready and stirring the pasta. When Rey is done talking, she says “One second,” finishing up and serving dinner. Rey waits nervously, ready to be laughed at or at the very least politely rejected. Rose turns around and passes Rey an unexpected bowl. Rey blushes and stutters out a thank you, which Rose answers with a smile. Then she responds. “Sounds like a date!” “Really?” Rey says. A date? Like a real date? A date with Rose, who made Rey dinner without being asked, who doubled Rey’s plant collection when she moved in, who would marathon episodes of How It’s Made with her, and would actually listen and care when she asked Rey about her day? “Yeah! Sounds exciting. Like being undercover, or something! You’re cool, I wouldn’t mind pretending to be your girlfriend for a few hours.” Rey doesn’t know how to feel about this response. Her heart skips a beat when Rose says she’s cool, but she feels herself deflate when Rose makes it clear it’s a one time thing. It could definitely have gone worse, though. When Rose beams and tells Rey about all the things she is most excited for at the fair, Rey feels like she has made a bigger mistake than she had originally thought.

*****

The morning of the triple date Rey sleeps in for as long as she can, waiting until they have to leave for the fair to exit her room and face Rose. “There you are sleepy head! It’s nearly eleven, we have to leave in like ten minutes. We wouldn’t want your friends to have a bad first impression of your girlfriend would we?” she says with a wink. Rose is dressed in a floral button up and ripped jeans, her hair tied up in a loose bun. She looks good and Rey can already feel some heat creeping up her neck. I’m such a useless lesbian. What has she gotten herself into? “Don’t worry, I’m ready to go.” God, she was so not ready.

*****

When they arrive the other two couples are already waiting under the awning of the white and blue ticket booth, its sign flashing cheerfully even though it is midday. Different rides reach high into the sky behind them, a ferris wheel, a skyscreamer, a roller coaster. There are tents with striped canopies just waiting to steal every penny from their pockets with their silly games. Everywhere Rey looked she was greeted by obnoxiously flashing lights and bright shades of red, yellow, blue, and green. Rose takes a hold of Rey’s hand before they are spotted. “Hey, just act natural, they won’t know what’s up at all,” Rose says at Rey’s shocked expression, as though she was the one who should be worried about being outed as a fraud. As they get closer she can hear the inviting sounds of carnival music and the dull rush of hundreds of voices mingling together. She inhales the aroma of frying pastries and her mouth waters. Finn is the first one to spot them. His head swings back in a laugh and he claps in delight. Jess’ jaw hits the floor and she just stares until Kare nudges her side and tells her to be cool with one of those inside glances they always share. Poe gives them both a big hug and proceeds to introduce everyone in the group. “I’m so happy to meet you all! Rey has told me a lot about you,” says Rose. “All good things I hope,” says Poe. “And a little bad- wouldn’t want Rosy here to think we’re boring” adds Jess. Rey rolls her eyes. “Rose has some things she wants to visit first,” says Rey. Rose says that she doesn’t really mind and that someone else can pick, but everyone else insists that as the newest member of their friend group that she gets to plan the day. Since she’s outnumbered, she drags Rey through the crowds of people running around with their pink clouds of cotton candy and laughing and waiting in lines over to the bumper cars. Poe is the best, dipping and dodging around them all before coming up from behind and sending them all crashing into their steering wheels. By the end he has teamed up with Rose to corner people and they make are truly menacing pair, striking terror into the hearts of their victims. Poe wants to go for another round, Rose cheering in agreement, but everyone else groans so they make their way to the skyscreamer, the ferris wheel, and the dart throwing where Finn wins a teddy bear he says is for Bee. Rose’s hand is back at home in Rey’s every minute they stand beside each other. By the time they reach the haunted house Rey finds herself almost getting used to it.

*****

A skeleton drops from the ceiling, giggling menacingly and causing Rose to scream and basically jumps into Rey’s arms. Rey pulls her into a hug, laughing into her hair. “I’d say get a room, but you probably don’t want to in this house. It’s haunted!” says Poe strolling past them into the next room with his fists raised. Rey pulls away quickly. She is grateful for the spooky dark red lighting as she feels heat crawling up her neck into her face. Rey feels a slap in the face of emotions. She feels ashamed at how comfortable she has gotten already, that she almost felt like there was something real, something genuine between her and Rose. She reminds herself this is a one time thing. That Rose is just doing this as a favour, that she just wanted someone to visit the fair with, that she doesn’t owe Rey anything. Rey resolves to feel less warm and comfortable for the rest of their date. Their date which wasn’t even a date. They move onto the giant, looping blue rollercoaster and Rose clutches Rey the whole time, screaming and laughing in delight, but Rey’s heart is no longer in it. When their feet reach solid ground once more, she tells the rest of the group to go on without her so she can sit and recover, claiming the rollercoaster made her queasy. Rose looks worried, but after a second her eyes light up. “I know something that will make you feel better!” She skips away pulling the group along on her next adventure. As they walk away, Rey feels something like relief and puts her face in her hands. “Mind if I sit with you?” Rey looks up to see Finn’s face looking down at her with concern. She gestures to the spot beside her in welcome. “Something wrong? You’ve been kind of off since the haunted mansion. Is everything okay with you and Rose? I mean, she seems to be having a great time. And we all love her,” says Finn. Rey disassembles a leaf which she had found on the ground. “It’s okay. We’re fine. We’re great.” Finn looks unconvinced. “It’s just… Rey I don’t understand why you wouldn’t have told me that you and Rose got together. I mean, you called me up the first time she gave you a hug to tell me she had the strongest, warmest, kindest, softest-” “Okay I get the point,” says Rey picking up a new leaf and tearing it in half. “Is this your first date?” Finn asks, getting to his point. Rey sighs. She couldn’t keep anything from Finn even if she wanted to. “If you could call it that.” “Rey, what is going on between you and Rose?” Rey gives in and explains their ruse. How she had lied, how she had pulled Rose into her lie. By halfway through her story Finn is grinning so wide she thinks his face might fall in two. “ - Finn? Finn, this isn’t funny. I’m dying. This, here, is how I die.” Finn shakes his head side to side, laughing. “Rey, she is so into you. Like, totally, super into you. Like ‘I want to kiss you until I die from lack of oxygen’ into you. ‘Let’s adopt to a dog and move into the mountains’ into you. ‘I want you to take me to bed and-” “Thank you Finn, I’ve gotten your point.” Rey shakes her head, smiling at her friend. “Look what she has agreed to do for you. If she wasn’t crazy into you already there is no way she would be here. And if she is acting, she better get all the oscar’s, because, man, the way she looks at you is exactly the way Poe looks at me after I tell him he can have the last cookie.” Rey laughs, but is certain Finn is just trying to cheer her up. She doesn’t have time to ask him if he is serious because that’s when Rose bounces back over to sit between her and Finn. The other three follow behind, Kare with a large funnel cake. “Hey, sweetie, you feeling better? I have something that will help!” Rose says rubbing Rey’s back. Over her shoulder Finn rolls his eyes, and mouths ‘look! Look at this’ while dramatically waving his hand for emphasis. Rey smiles and looks away from Finn into Rose’s eyes. “Yes, I really am.”

*****

With that the triple date comes to an end, Poe claiming that he and Finn have been away from Bee for too long. There are hugs all around, and everyone tells Rose how much they love her and that she has to come to their next party. “Rey, if you ever do anything to hurt Rose, you will have me to answer to,” says Poe. “Poe! That is so unfair, you know me,” says Rey. Poe laughs pulling her into a warm hug. “Nice catch, you’ve got a really good one this time,” he says quietly so only she can hear.

And then they are gone. And it’s only Rose and Rey. Rey and Rose. As they head back to their apartment Rey’s hand is cold, strikingly empty. She feels a sting behind her eyes, a hollowness in her chest. She can’t wait to be alone in her room with her plants. Rose nudges Rey on the shoulder and she looks over to see Rose share a sympathetic smile, as though she can tell what is going on in Rey’s head. “Hey, I had a really good time. Your friends are really nice.” Rey smiles back weakly before putting her head back down. “Yeah, they were on their best behaviour for you today. And I don’t think they figured out what we were doing, which is great,” Rey says. They keep on walking in silence, Rose quiet as they wait at a stoplight. She only speaks again when they cross the road, nearly home. “I would love to go out with you all again. Or just with you, if you want. Like, another fake date. But also not fake this time.” Rey looks over at Rose to see if she is joking. She can’t be because she looks mortified, blushing and staring stubbornly straight ahead. Rey finds a smile growing on her face. “So, like, a real date?” “Yeah! But if you didn’t want to go on a real date I would be totally fine with another fake one too.” “Yes! I would like that,” Rey says. Rose looks over, still unsure and nervous. “To the real date. Real date sounds nice,” Rey clarifies. “Oh okay! Awesome, that’s great. I mean, to the real date. Those are better than fake dates, usually,” Rose says. The bounce is finally back in her step and Rey feels just as light, as though her heart had never left the rollercoaster. A date. A real date. With Rose, who smiled like the sun and made Rey feel just as warm. Rose, who looked at Rey like she was special, who could tell when she was sad, who brought her funnel cake and gave the strongest, warmest, kindest, softest hugs. Rey hesitates before taking Rose’s hand. Rose looks over, beaming, and interlocks their fingers, swinging their arms lightly. Rey marvels at how natural, how warm, how comfortable, she feels with their palms pressed together. It feels like home.

*****

They are late into another night at Poe’s house. Poe and Finn cuddle together on their usual sofa, Jess and Kare sitting on his large couch with Bee sleeping between them, Finn’s teddy bear resting loosely in her mouth. And Rey is on the the carpet with Rose laughing brightly in her lap, a drink in one hand and Rey’s shoulders in her other arm. Rey feels safe, happy, warm, and more than a little tipsy. She feels like nothing could possibly go wrong ever again. Until- “So Rose, you never told us about how you and Rey got together, I feel like there is a fun story there,” Jess says. Finn laughs out loud before slapping a hand over his mouth. Everyone else claps and nods enthusiastically. Rose looks at Rey with a wicked grin. Rey groans, dipping her head into Rose’s shoulder to hide from the world. “Well,” begins Rose, “have I got a story for you.”

#starwarsfemslashweek #finnpoee #lgbtlukenet #wlwfinn #there's a lot of pilot banter and finn being rey's best friend #and lot's of wlw love!#my fic

58 notes · View notes

sevensity · 7 years

Note

RFA +Saeran reacting to a girl asking female MC out

I know it took me ages to write and I’m so sorry but thanks for waiting T.T

YOOᔕᑌᑎG:

You guys are attending a real life meetup with some other LOLOL members, but the meetup is really just a bunch of y’all hanging around someone’s house playing LOLOL together

There’s another girl there, and the both of you get along really well

Yoosung is so glad to see that you’re having fun at first, but after a while, his inner tsundere kicks in and he becomes a bit sour

Why isn’t she paying that much attention to me? I’m the one she loves after all.

He repeatedly tries to include himself in your conversation, but every time, the girl pushes him back out

Yoosung ends up in the corner of the room, a ball of bitterness, you can practically see the black cloud hovering around him

“Why are you even going out with him? I mean no offense but he seems a bit…possessive,” the girl comments

You see Yoosung flinch a bit, and you open your mouth to retort, but she continues

“So I think it would be a much better idea for you to go out with me.”

Yoosung lets out a hacking cough, having just choked on his own spit

Everyone is staring at you

“Uhh…well…I don’t think I can do that. You see, Yoosung is the only person I’ll ever love, and although of course he’s not perfect, he’s the right one for me, and I couldn’t have asked for a better boyfriend. I’m sorry.”

She girl puckers her lips and sighs, a bit sad

She nods and continues playing her game, while you sense Yoosung’s eyes boring into your back

You can feel the sparkles in the air before you even turn around to look at his beaming face

You give him a double thumbs up, which he reciprocates with a wide smile

When the session finishes and you return to Yoosung’s apartment, he immediately snuggles you and giggles into your neck

“Hearing you say that about me makes me feel so much better about myself, thank you.”

“Anytime.”

ᘔEᑎ:

He had just finished performing an amazing show, one that ended in passionate song and tears

You go congratulate him, and you spot one of his co-actresses coming up to you

You’d seen her in several of his plays now, and whenever you two made eye contact, you would feel nervous because her beauty and talent were overwhelming

It almost feels like…a female version of Zen…

So as she makes her way through the crowd, your palms grow a bit clammy, and you’re trying to summon up the courage to say something, anything

Zen obviously takes note of her too, because he quickly clears his throat and opens his mouth too greet her

But she doesn’t even glance at him. Instead, she grabs your hand, looks deep into your eyes, and said “I seem to have fallen in love with you, fair lady, I would please ask, may I have your hand in marriage?”

Okay yeah it’s definitely a female Zen

Zen glances at you in confusion

But you’re just as bewildered as he is

Meanwhile, the actress is staring back and forth between the two of you, eyes wide

An awkward moment passes before she suddenly lets out a small gasp, covering her mouth with a gloved hand

“Wait you don’t mean to tell me…that you guys are going out?”

Zen is brought back to Earth to reassert his dominance

“Yeah, that’s right,” he says with a proud smile, hooking his arm through yours

“Woe! Woe is me!” she cries out, drawing the attention of several people around you, before skipping off

She melodramatically spins around the stage once and disappears

“I can’t believe…I could have lost you to a woman!” he says as some sort of afterthought

Zen seems to think that now you’re twice at risk of getting ‘snatched away’

So he’ll look threateningly at girls too if they approach you

Zen I hope you realize you’re scaring away your own fans

Next time you see the actress, she smiles at you and invites you to coffee

she explains that she’ll halt her advances on you, she merely thinks it would be a shame to not have an amazing person like you in her life

Therefore, friends

You two plus Jaehee becomes BFFLS

ᒍᗩEᕼEE:

There’s this one female customer that comes back several times a week

But to be honest, she seems a bit shady

She’ll order, then sit at a table nearby and seemingly observe you work while trying to be sneaky

and by sneaky I mean she’ll haunch over behind her cup and peer across the rim of her sunglasses at you

When you look her way, she’ll pretend to be examining the grains of wood in the table, but as soon as you resume your duties, you just know she’s staring at you again

You talk to Jaehee about it one day

“Yes, I noticed the same thing, and to be honest, I’m feeling uneasy about it. Should we tell her to stop?”

You decide that that would be the best idea

So the next time she comes, luckily, there’s only one other person in the shop

“We know you’ve been staring at MC while she’s working, and we would both like to ask you to please stop, as it’s making us both really uncomfortable.”

Shady Glasses Lady sorta yelps and bites her lip

“I-I’m sorry…” she finally says, looking appropriately abashed. “I just…I just really like MC and I was wondering if she would be my girlfriend.”

You guys freeze for a moment, though Jaehee recovers in a heartbeat

“She cannot, because she’s already taken by me.”

“But-”

“No buts. She’s my girlfriend, and if you can’t accept that, I must ask you to please not return until you’ve taken care of your feelings.”

Muttering under her breath, the lady stomps out

You feel your heart beating in your throat

Jaehee getting so defensive is actually super attractive?

She sees you gaping at her and starts to ask what’s wrong, but you gently kiss her on the forehead and whisper a gentle I love you so much

Baehee wraps her arms around you and buries her face in your neck

“I love you too.”

ᒍᑌᗰIᑎ:

You’re waiting outside his meeting room, which had just finished

Business people stream out, and among them, you spot Jumin lurking in the back

He’s slowly approaching you, but before he can grab your hand, a woman wearing a neat blouse and a pencil skirt holds out a hand

Hesitant, you take it, going for a handshake

But she tilts her head down and plants a sweet kiss on the back of your hand

“I’ve seen you around this building several times already, and I’m captivated by your beauty. Would you consider becoming my girlfriend?”

“Um..uh…I-uh…what?” you manage to stammer rather ungracefully

Jumin sees the hand kiss, but doesn’t hear what she says, so when he arrives, he looks quizzically at her your hand in hers, but otherwise simply smooches the top of your head

“Ah, I see. Is he your current partner?” she continues, turning her intense gaze towards him

“Yes she is.”

“Then, I would like to discuss a business deal regarding MC. I wish her to become mine.”

And thus begins some business debate about your net worth and assets either party would gain should you choose to become her girlfriend

Jumin’s not having any of it though, oh no

He’s mad

How dare someone try to take you away from him?

He gives her a chilling look, warning her to leave, before he whisks you away

As soon as you’re alone again, he holds you close to his body and says

“MC, might you please try to refrain using your powers of seduction on other people? Use them only on me.”

you do just that

It’s a steamy night

ᔕᗩEYOᑌᑎG:

You’re at a flower shop for whatever reason with your man, and a small, quiet girl wanders around, rearranging bouquets, creating beautiful displays with a wide array of colourful blossoms

She’s the only person working there

Whenever you two approach to ask her a question, she only looks at Saeyoung

Maybe once or twice she glances your way, but immediately ducks her head and scurried away afterwards

Saeyoung’s grinning ear to ear, the bastard already knows what’s up

Sort of digs it?

(not in a fetishistic sense, more like, it makes him so happy to see how other people fall for you)

He actually brings her to the side and tells her to confess to you

Which she eventually does, as an absolute blushing mess, fully knowing that you’re already taken

But better out than in, right?

At least that’s what Seven told her

She stammers so much you aren’t sure exactly which words she uses, but when she finishes, you pull her into a tight hug and tell her it’s okay

You guys don’t really become close friends, but every week a new bouquet of gorgeous flowers arrive at your door, with a sweet little message written on a card dedicated to you

ᔕᗩEᖇᗩᑎ:

He kinda forgot about the existence of lesbians and bisexual people and what they imply

until today

You’re out doing an ice cream run, and the girl serving you is paying extra attention to your cone

It looks like it belongs in a museum

seriously how does someone manage to make ice cream look so good???

You order two scoops, she gives you three, and adds special toppings for free hehe it rhymed

Saeran expects the same treatment, but he gets exactly what he ordered

What the fuck is this shit why does she get all the fun stuff and I don’t??

He angrily accuses her of favoritism

“Well I mean, yeah, because she’s the one I want to date.”

Saeran almost drops his cone

“Excuse me?”

“I mean, I like her, and I want to ask you out,” she says, turning towards you

Before you can say anything, Saeran has already whisked you away

He’s pouting, brows furrowed as he paces back and forth

He’s resisting the urge to go back and fight her, just because he knows you don’t approve of violence

Saeran’s talking to himself, about how people are dangerous, about how he doesn’t want to lose you, about how he never thought that someone else might fall in love with you

But gently, you walk up to him and boop his nose with your ice cream

A smear of chocolate sauce is left as evidence, but you teasingly lick it off

He shudders, forgetting his worries, and leans in for a deep kiss–

“Ya silly, we forgot to pay.”

291 notes · View notes

nirah10 · 8 years

Text

From Jill,

A Christian cousin of mine who is a ‘heterosexual awareness activist’ (yes, he actually calls himself that) shared the following extract from a blog post of a gay male bartender, who goes unnamed in his blog. (Yes, my homophobic cousin spends his free him trolling gay bloggers and then flaming them.)

Now my cousin claimed this bartender was heterophonic and according to my cousin’s rant was ‘bashing on straight people and traditional marriage and shaming any straight woman who dared to be happy about marrying a man.’

I personally think my cousin is insane and reading into things. But as a lesbian sometimes I may be a bit of a bias judge.

I remember ages ago a debate on here about heterophobia potentially actually existing and of problems with creating LGTB only streets and communities.

So below is the extract my cousin posted.

Do you think my cousin is right? Or is the bartender being reasonable?

I think the bartender is being reasonable. Although to be fair I feel a bit jilted by bachelorette parties. I was at a gay night club a while ago and a pretty young girl started dancing with me. We started making out and she started giggling. I broke off the kiss and saw another girl filming it. Turns out she was straight and had been dared at the bachlorlette party to make out a lesbian. So yeah. I felt humiliated and like they were making light of my sexuality. And thought I never met him, I kinda get where this bartender is coming from.

Does that make both him and I hetrophobic?

So here is what my cousin shared, which was written by a bartender:

‘In Australia same sex couples can’t get married yet. Homophobia continues to be a problem with same-sex couples still risking getting dirty looks and lewd comments by some members of the public. The saturation of heterosexual culture and straight couples can also make you feel alien, isolated and lonely.

So there is a reason LGTB people want safe spaces like Gay Bars; not just for hooking up and dating but also to be in a space that you know is free of homophobia and full of people who get you, and get the feeling of being an alien sometimes and are there embrace the chance to be together and feel like part of a community. Community spirit is important and we are stronger together. With LTGB suicide so high, having a space where you are surrounded by people who know what you are going through is important and after a hard day, say after a flight with homophobic relatives, walking into the pub can be like a breath of fresh air and the sense of community and not being alone is mood altering to the extreme.

In other words, I love where I work. I am a bartender at a LGTBQ pub. And despite working there forty-eight hours a week (six nights a week, with 5pm starts and 1 am finishes) I can’t get enough of it. While I work nights, sometimes I will even go to the pub for lunch with friends and I don’t mind it at all. I love the community, the locals and the atmosphere and am honestly one of the people who love going to work.

Sometimes we even get straight people coming into the bar, and they are more than welcome to. A lot of the time straight friends will come as a show of support to help their friend who may be questioning their sexuality or just recently come out and have never been to a LGTB pub before and don’t have any LGTB friends.

I also love when parents will come in with their LGTB kids, the mum and dad will sit eating lunch with their young adult kid to show they are learning, adapting and supportive of their child’s sexuality.

There is only one problematic thing about some of the heterosexual guests (only some, the majority are lovely, supportive and very respectful) and that is hen’s nights/bachelorette parties, one or two of which seem to find their way to the pub every weekend.

We are obviously happy that they are getting married.

But to celebrate getting married in a pub that caters to LGTB people who legally can’t get married is a bit insensitive.

For example, more than half of our customers as in loving, committed and long-term relationships and if they could would have been married years ago. And so to come in to a LGTB safe space and remind a lot of the couples who are trying to enjoy a peaceful Friday night that they can’t get married yet is a touch insensitive.

Another problem with bachelorette parties is the lewd comments and sometimes even attempting groping. Women like to let loose and have fun on their friend’s last night of freedom. But if you want to flirt with men, go to a straight club or a strip show as lewd comments and groping makes many of the men feel awkward and like they are pieces of meat. LGTB spaces are a space for gay men where they can be open about their sexuality and so to come into the pub for that peace of mind and then to be suddenly hit on by partying women can be uncomfortable. If you want to get down and party with someone at a gay club ladies, I’m sure some of our lovely lesbians will be willing to oblige you on the dance floor.’

I will share that blog post but I won’t share what my cousin wrote as it was ugly and contained offensive and foul language.

So what is your opinion on the bartender’s opinion?

Dear Jill,

It’s a very interesting and a very complex topic to discuss. It’s the kind of thing that I’m sure could be a conversation that lasted hours, but I’ll try to keep my response fairly simple. Please keep in mind that this is all simply my opinion, born from what limited knowledge and experience I have.

1) I have met people who are clearly heterophobic, so I would definitely say that it’s real. It’s quite rare but it’s out there. I have met a few people who just make little remarks about “breeders” being gross, making faces at straight couples, or not respecting a straight person refusing their advances because “everyone’s a little bit gay”. But then there are some, like one woman in particular that I used to see semi-regularly and even stayed in my home (a relative of an old roommate) who was extremely rude and could actually get violent because she disliked heterosexuals so much. She was very confrontational and had a blind hatred for anyone that wasn’t obviously gay.

2) In my opinion, as tempting as it is to create communities and safe places for certain types of people, I believe it is ultimately volunteered segregation and I think it doesn’t help things in the long run. This is, of course, an opinion and one that I am quite open about because I’ve not had many discussions with people who have spent large amounts of time in such communities. My main reason for this belief is because of what I see happening in my own country between the First Nations people and pretty much everyone else, or with the Chinese communities in some of the big cities. There are reservations for First Nations people to live in so that they can be with their own people and live in their own culture--a lovely idea. I’m not going to debate all the pros and cons and he-said-she-saids of it, because it is a sensitive subject, but I can tell you that that segregation leads to tension, hatred, and a lack of empathy from both sides. It creates an Us and Them mentality and divides us both mentally and physically based on nothing other than our races. My boyfriend has been verbally attacked and called a traitor by other First Nations people (yes, he is First Nations himself) because he disagrees with the idea of living on a reservation. In bigger cities, the same thing is sometimes seen with the China Town areas. I fully understand the desire to be surrounded by people just like you in order to feel comfortable, but I’ve never seen isolation lead to anything good.

3) That all being said, I give Australia more leeway with this particular situation because there is not yet real equality for the LGBT community. In Canada, we have equality and it’s quite rare to see open homophobia (at least in my province anyway-- I can’t speak for the whole country). Here, I think creating LGBT exclusive communities or bars would only serve to needlessly deepen a divide that has been slowly disappearing over the years. In countries or areas where homophobia is still common and there are not yet laws in place to give the same protections and rights to LGBT people and everyone else, I think the need for safe places is very understandable and I support it.

4) Sure, it’s insensitive to celebrate a marriage around people who can’t get married yet, but I really think that making a fuss about it isn’t going to help. If you want straight allies, you don’t make them by ruining something beautiful for them because you can’t have it too. Instead of getting mad that I can’t get married too (which is something that particular person can’t change for me), I would just try to be happy that they’ve found someone to love. Isn’t that what’s it’s supposed to be about anyway? Worry about hatred and discrimination, not someone just being thoughtlessly insensitive or else people stop listening to what you have to say.

5) I don’t really think what this bartender is talking about is necessarily an LGBT problem. Bachelorette parties go to straight bars and get out of hand too. I used to work in a Chinese restaurant and experienced a bachelorette party come through that were rowdy, inappropriately sexual for a family restaurant, and harassed the male staff and other customers. I’ve seen women be too pushy with their advances (married, gay, simply not interested, etc) and disrespectful of men’s right to their own body in many different situations as well. While the events discussed in the article occurred in a gay bar, I think it’s more of a problem with the double-standards our society has created regarding women’s sexual behaviour (primarily that it doesn’t count as sexual assault if a woman does it and women sexually assaulting people is considered “funny”) and people just being douchebags in general. It’s the kind of thing that pops up everywhere and it just so happens that this particular bar that experiences it is one for LGBT people (though the woman who wanted video of her making out with another woman was clearly LGBT targeted).

Finally, I suppose I do agree with the bartender, just with a couple of footnotes added in. I think safe places for LGBT people in Australia are appropriate as equality and acceptance has not yet been established. Celebrating a marriage in a gay bar is definitely insensitive, but I think getting upset about it will hurt the cause more than help it. And I absolutely agree that the behaviour described is incredibly offensive and inappropriate, but I don’t think it’s necessarily a gay club problem so much as it is people who would probably be just as offensive and inappropriate if they went somewhere else. Douchebags are gonna be douchebags no matter where they are.

#hello friend #this time it's personal #submission

0 notes