#shared this on discord. but thought I'd share it here too
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Concept: post-leaving the cabin ending Quiet and Shifty, because they're still gods, just in a smaller form, most mortals struggle fully seeing what they look like.
Quiet just looks like a shadowy silhouette of a human, with maybe wings that sometimes appear, sometimes not. And even the Shifty's Stranger heart seems like just a regular person, tho no one can agree what they actually look like.
People don't usually give them a second thought, but the moment they try to describe them to others, or get a good look at them, they realize it's impossible to do so and get headaches. Only Quiet and Shifty (and all their smaller pieces) can see each other for what they truly are.
#shared this on discord. but thought I'd share it here too#Heathens AU#< cuz it's where I'll mainly be using it#slay the princess#the long quiet#the shifting mound#the stranger#the unknown together#sal rambles#stp headcanons
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☠️🥀
#art#I just wanted to see if there was a recording function on my laptop and there is! It looks interesting so I thought I'd share#Imagine the first protomen album playing in the background - It's what I was listening to actually while painting haha#The colors look terrible on mobile... I don't want to deal with that 😭 it's more vibrant on my computer#Anyways the recorder only recorded the main photoshop window.#it’s strange not to see my screen not half covered by references along with the layers/history haha When I stream on discord it does it too#I was getting really annoyed and bored with the rendering process I had grown accustomed too#Lazy sketches and thousands of transparent brushstrokes of layers were getting to me - almost a watercolor technique?#Been messing around a lot and this painting method is quite fun actually - I think that's what is most important - the results be damned#I had stopped touching the liquify and smudge tool for a really long time and I've been using it for this#So yes I've been enjoying myself and to change the current more I've been doing a lot developed sketches too#also....Sometimes I doodle chibi VHD while in class...would anyone actually be interested if I post them on here? ♡(๑´• .̫ •ू`๑)
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This is the good luck genshin shitpost, reblog to get good news in your near future too
#lynx thinks#this is terrible i made it in like half an hour but i had to share the news :3#bruh ive been soooooo stressed about getting this job bc i wanted it so bad#i get to work in a theater department and help with the costuming! and i get to catalogue costumes too :3#anyway lmao i made this to announce the good news to the discord server with my friends in it and i thought I'd share here too#genshin impact
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Where to make friends as an adult.
Recently I saw a devastating citation stating that most adults find it hard to make new friends as it feels like there is a lack of community and resources to do so. It takes nearly 50 hours of time together to move from mere acquaintance to casual friend. For more advanced levels of friendship, it can take more than 200 hours before you can consider someone “close”. (source)
So, though I'm not an expert by any means, I thought I'd offer some examples, ideas, and tips on finding and making friends as an adult! Check below the break :>
Ideas on where to find friends:
🆓 Local free (or cheap) events. I went to a presentation that included a free beer in the ticket cost and I had a blast! Most cities have an events calendar you can look at. Soon I'm attending a free event for the transgender community honoring those that came before us. 📖 Library programs. Most libraries that I've seen don't even require a library card, just your email or phone number to sign up for a program! Be it a presentation, class, or event, the library is the place to be!
❕Events of interest. I think about what I'm interested in and what I would like to connect with people about, and I search around to see what I can find. I use sites like Eventbrite to help me search.
💻 Online Communities. For those who can't make it out very often, consider joining online communities by searching for fandoms or topics of interest and see if there is a discord server, bluesky feed, tumblr community, or other communities on socials!
How to make friends:
Consistency. Once you find a place you enjoy going to, an organization you whose events your enjoy attending, or a series of events that takes place KEEP GOING!! Consistency is key, you have to keep interacting with folks to become friends with them.
Transparency. Just be yourself, but that doesn't mean you should be trauma dumping! Sharing personal detail allows us to feel closer to people, but make sure you're not sharing too much information! That can always come later when you're closer friends.
Confidence. You have to believe that you're someone that people want to be friends with. Don't believe it? Well ask your current friends why they are friends with you! You'll not only get a confidence boost, but also hopefully share a touching moment with your existing friends.
Follow up. If you want to be friends with someone you've met, you have to build up the nerve to further connect with them. This means sharing phone numbers or socials.
Start talking. The best way to do this is by asking questions or by giving a non-threatening compliment. Try not to make it all about you, though it is easiest to talk about the one thing we know best (ourselves) it typically won't help you make new friends! Show that you're interested in them, their thoughts and feelings on the topic of the event or a neutral topic such as musicians or food.
Questions. Ask open ended and non-invasive questions and follow through. Examples below!
Invite them out. Once you've established an acquaintance, invite them to hang out! BUT if you're the one inviting them out then you need to make sure you have some plan in mind. This could be going to a trivia night, a local event, or going to a new place together.
Further questions or topics of discussion:
I'm new to this [place or reocurring event] how long have you been coming here? Do you like it so far?
If you could be a crab or a lobster, which would you be and why? (make sure you have an answer ready!)
How long have you known about [place or event theme]? What got you interested in [place or event theme]?
(If at an event with drinks or food) I'm having trouble deciding what to choose, what should I try?
What superpower would you want and why?
What do you do for work? Do you like it? (follow by asking non-invasive questions about their job. This is easier when you have no clue what the job position actually is, lol).
Hey, I really like your style! Where did you get your outfit?/Who or what are your fashion influences?
What questions or topics of discussion do you typically go for when meeting new people?
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creature!sif AU
Hello howdy, I am here to share an ISAT AU where Siffrin is a weird lil creature who disguises his "monstrous" features and tries to be a hooman and such!
I've shared this in the ISAT discord server already and was not prepared for so many people to like it as much as they did so I thought I'd put my startup exploratory sketches here
Someone also made a fanfic already of this AU and that just boggles my mind, (if ya wanna read it for yourself, its on AO3 called " scales and feathers, tails and tethers") but is also pushing me to make more cause there's still more ideas I have that I haven't drawn yet, so if you too like this AU, stay tuned~☆
#in stars and time#isat#isat siffrin#creature!sif#chickenart#i just wanted to make a neat isat au#and now here i am...i aint complaining tho XD#seriously tho#tha amount of love for this au im already recieving is bamboozling to me#i appreciate all yall in the discord server#and you to fanfic person#idk if youre on tumblr but i think youre cool and awesome for making that fic#*hugs u*
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Please share your thoughts on the other 5 cutie marks, I'd love to hear!
Hi everypony! I got like 20 asks for the Dogwarts cutie mark lore so I'm here to speak my truth!
Before we start, I would like to write a quick reminder that a pony's cutie mark is not always their "special talent", but can also represent who they are, their personalities, and a possible destiny. Different cutie marks have different meanings and interpretations, but they're not just about representing what you're good at.
That being said, let's start with the cutie mark design I'm proudest of!
Ren's Cutie Mark
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Ren's cutie mark is of a sunrise and looks pretty simple at first glance but there was a lot of thought that went into this one.
First of all, I bet you're wondering why a sunrise? Well, in the show, it is pretty typical for unicorns with great magical abilities to have one relating to space (examples being Twilight Sparkle, Sunset Shimmer, Starlight Glimmer, and Sunburst). And I figured since I wanted Ren to fall into a similar position of potentially becoming an alicorn, I gave him a cutie mark following the same trend. And I chose a sunrise to reflect the way Ren seems to glow when he enters a room. The way he carries himself is very warm and bright it just catches your eye in a similar way the sun would.
Also, Ren wears sunglasses. So a sun-themed cutie mark seemed appropriate.
Additionally, there are a couple of smaller details I want to point out too. Like the sun rays, if you look at them for a moment you'll see they're shaped like little crowns! I of course had to put a crown in thanks to how much Ren likes to play royalty, so I snuck it in there. And then the red spots underneath could both be interpreted as the sun reflected over water or blood. (But of course, this is a kid show AU so there wouldn't be any blood in Ren's destiny, just a fun reference to the red king and his whole thing about blood dyeing the snow red)
Martyn's Cutie Mark
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I explained this one in an earlier ask but I thought I'd explain it again here for anyone who didn't see it!
Martyn's cutie mark is of a chopped log and a small stick.
This one is mostly a play on the name "Littlewood" but has other meanings too. As a character, Martyn tends to travel and explore quite a bit. In the Life Series specifically, he is usually the last one to find a permanent base and even then doesn't spend a lot of time in one place. Always on the move. Additionally, he's more of a wild card compared to other characters, always trying to be as unpredictable as possible.
The smaller detail here is the little swirl on top of the log is the same as the one on his Minecraft skin's shirt.
BigB's Cutie Mark
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Cookies! Cookies! Cookies! BigB's cutie mark is of 3 cookies where one is trying to eat the others. There are also a few sprinkles there made to look like action lines.
We all know BigB loves cookies so of course I had to give him a cutie mark with cookies in it. For this one, I decided to follow the cutie mark trend of "symbol/item important to the pony duplicated 3 times" (examples being Fluttershy, Applejack, Rarity, Pinkie Pie) but I added a bit more creativity to it with the top on trying to eat the others to represent just how tasty they are 😋
Additionally, rather than the first cookie trying to eat the others, you could interpret it as opening its mouth to talk. Because BigB can not keep a secret to save his life! In Double Life when he started "secret soulmates" with Grian, he didn't last a day without opening his mouth. He told Ren about it immediately because he felt bad for keeping things from him.
Also worth quickly mentioning: People pointed out in my original post that they don't think BigB would be the element of honesty because of his behaviour in Secret Life. But that's just Secret Life. I think Secret Life to BigB was like that episode of My Little Pony where Discord makes the main 6 act the opposite of their true element. BigB was just going through a weird phase of telling very obvious lies because a book told him to.
Skizz's Cutie Mark
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Skizz's cutie mark is of a lightning bolt from a couple storm clouds hitting the ground.
I think this is the cutie mark with the least thought put into it, unfortunately. There was still though just not as much as the others. The big thing I thought was fun was I made the lightning bolt shaped like an "S" to stand for Skizzleman. But other than that, this cutie mark sort of has the same meaning as Rainbow Dash's cutie mark. Quick like lightning, loud, bold, dangerous, and powerful.
Impulse's Cutie Mark
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Impulse's cutie mark is of a lit-up lightbulb.
I absolutely crowded this cutie mark with the letter i. If you look closely, there are 6 of them. Impulse's design also has an i-shaped pattern on the belly if you look closely enough. But that's more of a fun easter egg and doesn't exactly reflect Impulse as a character.
There are a couple of reasons I chose a lightbulb for Impulse, the first and probably most obvious is that he's a redstone guy! He's a technical guy who likes to work smarter, not harder. So I figured the My Little Pony equivalent would be a light bulb/electricity. The second reason for the lightbulb is that it's usually used as a visual representation when characters have that "eureka!" moment in cartoons. When someone has a brilliant idea a little lightbulb turns on above their head. So since Impulse is the ideas guy, I figured a lightbulb would work for his cutie mark.
Etho's Cutie Mark
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Etho's cutie mark is of a snowflake with a missing branch.
I promise there is more to this cutie mark than just "Canada is cold" even if that's part of the reason I wanted to give him a winter-themed cutie mark. While it is fun to make a nod to Etho being Canadian, I thought a winter-themed cutie mark would be fun to represent how he sometimes presents himself. Cold and a bit mysterious. I think deep down once you get to know him, those attributes melt away, but for people who have never met him, he may be intimidating that way.
I'll be honest, I don't watch a lot of Etho content, but I do have a few friends who identify as Etho girlies so I did my research. I was told in his Minecraft Let's Play World, that he has a snowflake build somewhere. I believe they said it was an iron golem farm? (Please correct me if I'm wrong) but I thought that was perfect for the cutie mark. And if you're wondering why there's a branch missing, it's because one of my friends said he was incapable of finishing builds sometimes so I thought that would be fun to include.
-=+=-
Alright. Rant over. To celebrate, here are a few pony doodles so I can put this post in my art tag.
#cherri.speaks#cherri.draws#trafficblr#my little pony au#renthedog#inthelittlewood#bigbst4tz2#skizzleman#impulsesv#ethoslab#Third Life x MLP#mclp
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Commissions Masterpost
While you can find all and more info here, I thought it'd be nice to have it also written out somewhere on my blog.
More crucial reason is, my job is not exactly paying well and I've been trying to get back to therapy (which is a lot), I need to pay rent too, so if there's a chance someone will want something from me it would be a huge help.
Everything under read more, there will be Some art examples attached, will be updated as time goes If I don't get overwhelmed, but obviously you can scroll thru my blog or other socials in my pinned for more.
I draw:
OCs and Fandom
Shipping (icluding OCxCanon)
Furry/anthro
Non-sexual nudity/non-explicit sexual acts (anything explicit will be +10$/200руб. on top of any regular price below)
Blood/light gore/horror elements
A no-no:
Ferals/animals
Anything hateful
Complex backgrounds
Fandoms: (some) characters of Hazbin Hotel/Helluva Boss; South Park, Camp Camp, any live action movies/real persons
> Contact me on Tumblr or Discord (kill.jpeg).
> I can reject an order if it makes me uncomfortable or I find it out of my abilities to draw.
> Payment is through Boosty, PayPal or SberBank.
> Please message me with as much reference as possible, for your character and the poses you want; or a description/idea for your order, otherwise it can take more time for me to start your commission.
> I'd also appreciate if you specified what you want your art to look like - I use many different brushes and coloring methods you will see in examples below - feel free to just send an example of my art (can look through my blog as well for it) so I will know what you want.
> Every additional character will be + 100%. Shading is +5$/100руб. to any kind of art.
> You may use art I make for you for anything, but please credit me.
Sketches (colorless/single-color)
Half-body: 15$/600руб. Fullbody: 20$/700руб.
Sketches (colored)
Half-body: 25$/800руб. Fullbody: 30$/900руб.
Lined (colored)
Half-body: 35$/1000руб. Fullbody: 40$/1100руб.
Painting/half-painting
Varies from 40$/1100руб. to 70$/1700руб. depending on complexity - ask if interested
Chibi
Generally 15$, might vary depending on the design complexity. Ask if unsure. (transformers are 17$ by default)
Icons
Varies from 20$/800руб. to 35$/1000руб., ask with an example. You can ask for a pride flag to be put as a background if you want as well.
Matching icons: 45$/1200руб.
Custom designs
I can design a character from description or a set of emojis.
Simple/chibi (includes orikero, kirby, sonic customs): 30$/1000руб.
Moderate (includes mlp, splatoon customs): 40$/1200руб.
Complex (includes transformers customs): 60$/1500руб.
Reference sheet
The base price for any reference is 50$/1300руб. (single fullbody), all the additional details: + each accessory, eyes close up, minor edit of the base drawing or any other item, a sketch - 5$/100руб. + bust, half-body, chibi from scratch - 10$/200руб.
!! The base price for a Transformers reference is 60$/1500руб. !!
Because of the image limit you can check a more detailed breakdown of pricing for reference images here.
DM me if interested or have any questions. I'll appreciate this being shared.
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MDNI 🔞🔞🔞🔞🔞🔞🔞🔞🔞🔞🔞🔞🔞🔞🔞
I've been posting these in the discord server I'm in, but I figured I'd start sharing my imagines here with you too. I apologize in advance if you think they aren't any good.
Without further ado, I present today's imagine. Alastor absolutely unable to control himself after seeing you in a revealing outfit.
CW masturbation.
Imagine this
Alastor sees you wearing a revealing fit and immediately has to leave the hotel lobby. Bothered by your stunning body he uses his swirling shadows to fall through the floor in a pit of darkness. Coming up through the murky shadows into his room he throws his overcoat off haphazardly; suddenly too hot to keep it on.
Loosing his tie he futilely attempts to feel less flushed but he can't get the image of you out of his mind. With a frustrated whimper he unbuttons and unzips his pants.
Taking his massive aching cock out he groans. The tip glistens with precum as he runs his hand up and down his considerable length. Panting heavily he pictures you and thinks about his stupid crush on you. His hand moves faster and faster as he comes undone under his own ministrations. Thoughts of you on his mind he cums with a low, husky, groan. Spurts of cum shooting out of his swollen tip in a powerful burst.
#alastor#hazbin hotel#hazbin alastor#alastor x reader#alastor x you#alastor smut#alastor x reader smut#alastor the radio demon#SeleneZQ
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Whatever go my dandys world matching pfps
I made these for me and my friends on discord but I thought I'd share em here too! Feel free to use them if you like em ^-^
#dandys world#dandys world fanart#dandys world sprout#sprout dandys world#cosmo dandys world#dandys world cosmo#glisten dandys world#dandys world glisten
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*taps microphone* Is this thing on?
I'd like to give my perspective on something, from someone who started out in the ACOTAR fandom as part of the general audience, and who has a sister that is not apart of fandom but has read the books.
I read the series back in November 2023 in about 2 weeks. I stayed off of social media for a bit until I decided to make a Tumblr account.
After reading the books, I wasn't sure if the series was complete. It didn't feel complete. The first three books focused on Feyre. Nesta had an entire, almost 800 page book dedicated to her. For me, it was natural to assume, "Oh, Elain is next!" because logically, that was the only thing that made sense. Why would two sisters have books, but the third wouldn't? The series would seem incomplete.
Flash forward, and I find out that yes, there will be more to come in the series. However, at this point, I was still unaware that a bonus chapter for Silver Flames existed until a friend casually mentioned it. I asked where to find it and I began reading.
The first part of the bonus chapter confirmed what I already believed from reading the books. Azriel and Elain share mutual feelings. Truly, I didn't need confirmation in the bonus, because there were moments in the books that I already had picked up on. The bonus was just a nice surprise. Something fun.
But imagine my shock when I decided to insert myself into fandom space as a casual reader, and see folks who are 110% convinced that the next book's main character is going to be a secondary side character that was introduced about 40% of the way into the 4th book.
You don't have to imagine my shock, because I'll tell you. The moment I set foot into this fandom, I have been beyond confused. Bamboozled. Befuddled. And honestly, a bit gaslit.
Prior to this bonus chapter, I assumed everyone thought it was obvious and picked up on the pattern. The first sister gets a few books to explore her powers, heal, and fall in love. The second sister gets a book to do the exact same thing. The third sister would get a book...to do the exact. same. thing.
There was a week where I had zero idea that the bonus chapter existed. There are STILL people who have no idea that the bonus chapter exists, and may never end up reading it. These people are not on Tumblr, Reddit, Instagram, or Discord, discussing in depth theories and potential love squares. They are solely relying on canon text.
So, genuinely, what do you think their reactions are going to be, if the next book does not focus on Elain, the third sister, but rather a priestess, who was part of someone else's story, who was only just introduced in the very last book, who does not have any ties to the plot? Yes. They will be lost, too.
My sister, who is part of the general audience, and is not present in fandom spaces, has the same opinion. The idea of Azriel and Elain not ending up together doesn't make sense to her. Prior to showing her the bonus, she had already assumed Azriel and Elain would be the next pairing in the next series. Because she had only read the canon text. The canon text that is available to everyone. The bonus is not.
So, essentially, what I'm trying to say is, if the next book does not feature Elain as the main character, and Azriel as the main love interest, with sprinkles of Lucien here and there because he is still important because of the mating bond, then there will be a gigantic chunk of casual readers, who are not involved in fandom spaces, that will be utterly confused at the direction of the story. Because for people who are not on social media, they are only using the canon books. Their information is only coming from the canon books that are available for all readers. If information in bonus chapters is supposed to be important, then it would be featured in books for everyone to read.
#elain archeron#azriel#elriel#pro elain archeron#pro azriel#pro elriel#death and his lovely fawn#elriel endgame#elriel supremacy#elain archeron x azriel shadowsinger#elain x azriel
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its prosecutor jiang wanyin!!!! oh fuck!!! / gifs + au rambling below the cut / follow for more mdzs x aa crossover stuff :3
all the gifs i made (poses traced off franziska):
hes so similar to franziska when you think about it. theyre both deeply insecure tsundere adoptive younger sibling of successful main characters. who carry whips. something something edgeworth choosing death and wwx actually dying also
his share code is HWFEFF if you wanna use him in a trial! you can't share backgrounds but heres the scenery from the donghua i used.
the easiest way to put custom stuff into objection.lol is to send it in discord and then use the link from opening it in your browser :)
a whole lot of AU stuff
the art im making is for if mdzs was an ace attorney game, playing from WWX's POV to solve various mysteries/cases over the course of the plot. so this scene would be from turnabout goddess, which would loosely cover the dafan mountain mystery.
cases include:
Turnabout Revenge (Mo Manor, quick introductory first case)
Turnabout Goddess (Dafan mountain, the good times flashback)
Turnabout Saber (the man-eating castle (omg hiii nhs))
The Blind Turnabout (Yi City arc)
Turnabout Deviation (the Koi Tower conference, Empathy on NMJ ala turnabout memories or beginnings. opening cutscene is his qi deviation)
The Blood-Soaked Turnabout (second Burial Mounds siege, flashbacks: Xuanwu, Sunshot, YLLZ, Nightless City massacre)
Turnabout Lotus Seeds (testimony about JGY, tree scene, golden core reveal, bathtub scene. opening cutscene could be JGS' death but that would make it canon rather than ambiguous)
Turnabout Confession (Guanyin temple)
the problem with splitting novel!mdzs into turnabouts is that flashbacks are a huge chunk of the book but they don't have mysteries/ cases to solve so they've gotta be lumped together with present day stuff. imo? many of the flashbacks would likely have to be abridged so they could be retold ala DL-6, SL-9, or the fourth grade incident, where characters talk about it over some pieces of art. this is really difficult when theres a metric ton of unspoken, complex, and signifcant history between every character lmao
there's not as much of a problem with the cql timeline but i have not finished it. so.
the opening cutscenes in ace attorney always show the murder and/or the murderer plotting. the first cutscene of the game would be MXY summoning WWX, muttering about getting revenge on his family (it would also be good for him to mention the yllz being dead because that's how the novel starts.) cut to WWX's POV as he wakes up covered in blood and the investigation segment begins.
for investigations of monsters (goddess, saber, etc) the cutscene would be a scene of some poor throwaway cultivator getting their shit wrecked.
it would be cool to make a breakdown for JGY but again I need to review that scene cause I don't know who I'd base him on. maybe Vasquez or Dahlia.
tell me your thoughts!! i'm working off of a mdzs summary/ skimming the novel because i don't remember it too well so if i get anything wrong please yell at me
Jin Ling's sprites & Nie Huaisang's sprites / masterpost
#PLEAAAASE send it to me if you do actually use my animations in a case🥺#here im adapting mdzs to aa gameplay rather than making a mdzs AU where they are lawyers#so jiang cheng is not a prosecutor in this hes just angry. and on the right side of the screen#that man has not graduated law school but then again no one in ace attorney has either#the names are based off of how ace attorney cases are either named after a distinctive item/location (bigtop bridge samurai etc)#or the main emotional/character type thing that happens (goodbyes reminiscence farewell)#the mdzs/aa au where the stories get blended (ie my tags on the nhs post) is very interesting but i would have to think about it very hard#and i dont want to . i would rather think about what the court record would look like (its full of severed limbs)#MDZS' EXPLORATIONS OF MORALITY MAKE ME CHEW ON ROCKS#urrgh i got carried away writing this post & wrote a couple hundred words comparing aa and mdzs' attitudes towards morality & public opinio#i could write an essay on this topic tbh.#can i call this an au? its the same story in the same universe just in a different format. hmm#mdzs#aa#art#mo dao zu shi#ace attorney#grandmaster of demonic cultivation#cql#the untamed#jiang cheng#jin ling#objection.lol#flashing image tw#pixel art#animation#my art#franziska von karma#i guess??#mdzs aa au
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ok ok what’s yours and moons love story. Beginning to end
OOC POST
It's a bit of a crazy story, actually!
We originally met online through TADC, when she messaged all the Caine accounts she could find for a shitpost "wedding" thing. We ended up hitting it off and talking about random things for a while. It started with my random fact about Kentucky marriage laws and how a couple used them to get married by cocaine bear (hence the below picture)
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We ended up learning about a shared interest in plague doctors, as well as discussing several very random topics. Anyways, she invited all the Caines to a discord server, and I ended up being the only one who actually showed up. We would end up talking for hours upon hours day after day there. It was genuinely shocking how much we had in common.
At this point, I had been kinda been picking up on some of the flirtatious undertones behind some of the things she was saying, but I wasn't 100% sure about it yet and was still kinda testing the waters. I'd heard the term love at first sight, and looking back on it, that's pretty much what it felt like. I had been developing a crush on her up to this point, and I kept thinking about her as I was getting ready for bed. I had to keep stopping myself from falling head over heels, reminding myself we barely even knew each other and telling myself "no, she's just being nice. Don't be weird, there's nothing behind this, she's just being friendly."
...As it turned out, she wanted to be a little more than friends... Given my feelings up to this point, I was a little overwhelmed when she told me. I had to take a minute to collect my thoughts, to process everything (hence her jokes about me pulling a Caine and running away). But I liked her, too, and was willing to try a long-distance relationship. So, that's what we did.
It was only a few days after we first got together officially that I told her I loved her. It just felt right. Apparently I caught both of us off-guard with it, since she was sure that she'd be the one who would've said it first. ...We both dived in a little too headfirst from there. From my side of things, it was just so exciting and exhilerating to have this feeling I'd been searching for all my life, and I wanted more of it. We took a step back and both agreed to try and take things at a more reasonable pace from here on out.
We ended up learning a lot about each other. It was like we were the same person, split apart and put in two entirely different situations but turning out the same way anyway. ...This similarity became concerning when we realized we both had the same last name, as well as the fact that we both had Scottish ancestry. But, one family search check later, we confirmed that we are not, in fact, related. Just another insane coincidence that further proves that we were made for each other...
We shared a lot with each other. Our interests, hobbies, ideals, feelings on various topics. Our experiences throughout life, good and bad. The darkest parts of us. Every day, we grew closer. There was no denying that there was something special between us.
That isn't to say everything was perfect. We both still had a lot to learn about ourselves and about each other. There were ups and downs. Things were far from easy. There was a lot of avoidable pain both ways. As time went on, we started to become a little more distant...
Eventually, the stress of life and school and worries and everything going on got to be too much, and she called for us to take a break from the relationship. This hurt, of course... But, taking a break and being done are very different things. I was okay with taking a break, since we would still hang out and such sometimes, just not as romantically.
But, that still wasn't enough. Everything continued to be really stressful, and she felt like she wasn't a net positive in my life and was dragging me down (though the truth was exactly the opposite). So, she decided to fully end the relationship. Which... Really hurt me. Badly.
I kind of fell into a depressive state for a while. I had opened myself up like never before, let myself be more vulnerable than at any point in my life. I had finally found love, the one thing I'd truly wanted all my life, the only thing I've ever needed, and then it was just taken right away. The one thing I feared more than anything else in the world had come to pass.
We would still talk occasionally, but not like before. I already hurt so much, and just talking with her without being able to say the love I still felt was torture for me. So, I distanced myself a bit. I dealt with things on my own. I learned a lot about myself as I came to terms with how things had ended up.
Eventually, I started to feel a little more okay. I knew I could never stop loving her, so I decided to try and turn that love from romantic to platonic and still try to be a friend. Because while I may have lost her, she didn't want me out of her life completely. I could make do as just friends.
But, when I started to come back and we started to talk more again, she realized how much she had been missing me while we were apart. She figured out that some of the things she'd been feeling had been more than she'd realized. She learned that she actually was happier when we were together, and that she still really enjoyed being with me.
So, she began to give little hints again, like before. And, again, I picked up on them, but I didn't want to believe them 100% because of how much I'd been hurt last time. I told myself that she was just showing platonic love, the same way I was. Things would never be the same again. They couldn't be. If I was good for her before, she wouldn't have left...
It was actually Randy who got us actually talking again, first on our blogs, and then regarding what we were being sent. This eventually led to us talking just in general, about all sorts of things... Including what had happened between us. It was emotional, but we both came out of it feeling better about things.
That said, it took until this post before I realized she still loved me and that it was okay to love her back, the way I'd been holding in all this time. We had a heartfelt reunion, though we weren't officially dating again just yet. It still took me a while after that to fully accept everything and let down my guard again, after how much I was still hurting from last time...
But I didn't like the feeling of keeping her away. Of having a barrier between us. I desperately craved that deep, personal connection of love with her again. So, I opened my heart up again. And I'm so incredibly grateful that I did.
Soon after that point, Randy showed up and all those shenanigans ensued. But they only managed to get us talking more about things and uniting against it, which actually brought us even closer together. So, I guess if one good thing's come out of that dumpster fire of stress and stupidity, it's that.
Things have been absolutely wonderful since we got back together. We both learned a lot about ourselves in our time apart, and things have been much better between us. The rocky, uncertain road from before the break had smoothed over. And we fell so much deeper in love the second time.
Add in the stress of the past several weeks, with all the Tumblr drama with these blogs and the hiatus and everything (which I'm not getting into because you can see all that for yourself by looking through our blogs), and you're caught up to the present day. Life is still very stressful for us both, but a lot less so than when we first got together. We understand ourselves and each other so much better, which helps us make less mistakes and treat each other more tenderly and personally in the ways that we need most.
As for the future, immediately after finishing school, I plan to find work and save up to visit her in Canada sometime in the summer. After that is a little hazy at the moment, but we'll figure out our lives and put together a plan to find stable jobs and create a good life for ourselves up there.
And that's it, that's our story. From when we met all the way to the present day. You said beginning to end, but I'm afraid there is no end to our love. The story's still being written. Our lives are still being lived. I hope to be able to add to this years into the future, when we're living together and when we start our own family. But it might still take a while to reach that point.
#pdw x shy#ooc post#love story#lore dump#tadc ask blog#tadc bluetooth#bluetooth tadc#caine tadc#tadc caine#moon x caine#caine x moon#caine x the moon#the moon x caine#idk how to tag this#i hope this is good
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Quick and dirty Umemiya hair tutorial
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Someone asked me for one on Discord and I thought I'd share it here too
#wind breaker#wind breaker (satoru nii)#umemiya hajime#wind breaker anime#windbreaker#hajime umemiya#might not be the most accurate#but thats how i do it lol#tomato man brings me so much joy i hope this helps more people draw him#feed me mooooooore🍅🍅🍅🍅
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GREEN MILK | #008 | save vs despair — mörk borg: a holistic retrospective
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:// A little over a month & 14,000 edited & well-considered words later, SAVE VS DESPAIR is complete to read in its entirety.
If you have any interest in TTRPGs or ever wondered what Mörk Borg's whole deal is – this is for you.
I approached it as a writing exercise & design analysis to understand what's so special about this game and art object, and I'm really proud of both this piece and what I learned for my own practice.
If you're invested in the TTRPG scene I'd appreciate it if you shared this with anyone who might enjoy it.
Our artform deserves as much high-quality analysis as we can cultivate, and the fact that I stumbled into writing what is currently the most thorough analysis I could find (which still has huge gaps in its perspective & approach) of one of the most successful games to emerge from the scene in recent years indicates that there is a need to encourage more writing like this.
In a perpetually collapsing digital infrastructure where so much of our design writing is ephemeral and lost to time (I've heard ancient tales of The Forge & Google+ eras, Discord is an unreferencable void & I really hope someone wiser than me is archiving all these podcasts) I hope that longer form writing might represent an opportunity for the ideas we have now to still be accessible (in one form or another) in years to come.
—
Too much patting myself on the back? Maybe.
But it's good writing and I think you'll get something out of it.
Personally I learned that cross posting on multiple platforms is exactly as fun as it sounds (I thought the whole point of starting a newsletter was to avoid this crap in the first place) and by the end of the month I just wasn't posting the illustrations I was making or sharing the last 2 (?) individual parts here as they went up after burning myself out on instagram.
So for the sake of my poor microwaved brain, if any of this interests you:
#indie ttrpg#ttrpg#ttrpg recs#ttrpg design#ttrpg dev#indie rpg#mörk borg#mork borg#morktober#MÖRKTOBER#game analysis#game writing#ttrpg writing#ttrpg review#green milk#tabletop#rpg
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These I've also shared on Twitter, but I thought I'd share them here before someone tries any sort of libel.
You know what's funny about this whole discourse about the Slow Damage patch ? The whole discourse reminds me of game mods, in a way.
Game mods are made by fans, for free no less, for you to download, and only if you wanted, to help improve your experience with a game.
Whether it's improving the aesthetic (character or background design) or tweaking some of the gameplay elements itself. Or adding new elements, or even changing things purely for shits and giggles.
That way, mods are akin to patches. More often than not, mods are made because the base game had flaws in their design (technical or otherwise) that the mod intended to fix or improve.
But these mods are optional. And naturally, most mods are going to use preexisting assets from either the game they're modding or from another game, assets that they'll either refine or combine with other assets to make something better.
While some mods earn a raised brow, if the mod isn't to one's liking, most generally just ignore it.
Except in this specific instance, some don't like the mod that is the patch and feel that it doesn't sit right with them for whatever reason, believing that its existence would be "spitting" on the original game or because it no longer sounds as snarky as they themselves would like to read it as.
But instead of ignoring the patch, which they were explicitly advised to do if they take offense to it, they decide to make their dislike everyone else's problem, and by poisoning the well, no less.
And one quick way to ensure that is to accuse the patch of bigotry towards the LGBT community.
I'm already aware that this same accusation is spreading like wildfire, both in Reddit and especially in Twitter, and in some Discord spaces, most likely.
But did anyone, and this includes the accusers, even play at least 40% of the patched version, and intensively at that, before making that claim?
Oh, I'm all too aware that bigotry is a real, serious and widespread issue.
But in most online circles nowadays, accusing something of bigotry right off the gate is also one surefire method of turning people off of it before they can even check it out for themselves.
I mean, what better way of publicly dragging something you don't like through the mud than to spread accusations/misassumptions that are quick for others to believe before anyone can even try and personally fact-check anything?
Especially in a place like the internet itself.
The note stating the avoidance of using a specific pronoun for some characters to not assume their identity could've been phrased better, yes, and the patch team did clarify their stance on the matter. Alas, anything can still easily be misinterpreted and used as flame bait.
But what's odd is that the people who first touted this claim (either here or in other platforms) have one thing in common: they never checked out the patch (let alone played through one certain route in full) to personally confirm if that really is the case.
Taking all this into consideration, I think that no matter how the patch was presented, it'd get backlash.
Even long before any of us knew this patch was even going to be a thing, even giving constructive criticism about the localization and any mistakes/goofs it made already drew ire, and it's those same people who took offense that are spreading the hate about this patch.
It all really boils down to the matter of the patch even existing, since - as some detractors point out - it's what they call to be a disrespectful spit to the face, even without factoring the false accusations of transphobia and plagiarism.
Let's say they used the JP game files instead and have the patch work with that version. They'd get decried for copyright infringement and they risk a C&D order.
Use the EN files? We already get the claims that they barely did anything to the text, among other things. Why?
Because they didn't adjust every single syntax and change every single word in every single sentence… when English isn't exactly the most versatile language and there's only ways you can translate something, especially in the simpler sentences like "Who are you?".
Using a thesaurus on everything would make it sound weird. Heck, the patch being more verbose and detailed and impersonal (which is what's to be expected when it's third person and in a visual novel, no less) already got it accused of being no more than a fancy MTL.
And it doesn't help that many already assume that the statement that MTL can be a helpful tool is also the same as "MTL being the superior translator of all time", and people will find anything and I mean anything to hate on something and discredit it.
And as for the preferring 1st person over 3rd person and vice versa? It's a matter of preference, yes, and that can't be helped.
But let's get one fact out in the open: Out of N+C's 5 main VNs, only one is told in first person POV in the JP/original version, and that's DMMD.
The other game that used 1st person narration is Slow Damage's spinoff game, Clean Dishes, but not the main/parent game itself.
And even years before they got licensed, the fan patches followed the intended narration viewpoint of the first 4 VNs. Third person for Togainu no Chi, Lamento, and Sweet Pool, and first person for DMMD.
Their respective localized versions (except Lamento), also followed the intended narration viewpoint, and nobody complained because that was all they knew.
But because Slow Damage's localization took the creative liberty of changing the narration from third to first person, with people exposed to it, it's not really surprising some have gotten accustomed enough to end up preferring it.
Even when another version that retells the game in original narration comes up, for the past two years, the localization has been what they knew, and that is what many usually then decide to stick to.
In the scenario where the localization - even if it would still be a mess - never changed the narration, would people still say "Oh but they should've changed it to 1st person since it would've enhanced the story"?
It's telling that it never happened with Togainu no Chi, Sweet Pool and DMMD, no?
And before anyone tells me that I just hate localizations overall, you don't hear me complaining about the official translation of any of the BLVNs that Mangagamer licensed, do you? I also have plenty of gripes with DMMD's fan translation over what it did to Mink.
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I'm a big fan of vampires and wanted to join a community centered around it, so I looked to discord, but most of the servers were roleplay focused or were lacking in vampire stuffs entirely (like vampire based media and folklore).
So I decided to make my own called 'The Wake'! It's a social server with different channels based around a bunch of different vampire related things, like movies, books, internet finds, resources, music, memes, and more. There's also a bunch of off-topic channels as well for pets, art, food, gaming, etc. (Also, vampire emojis!)
I've advertised it on tiktok, instagram, and reddit (as well as putting it on disboard), but I thought I would go ahead and put it here too to see if anyone would be interested in joining and sharing their vampire love or knowledge with the rest of us!
If so, please let me know! I'd be delighted to welcome in some more active members.
#vampires#vampire#vampire community#vampire coven#vampire aesthetic#discord server#join my discord#vampire lovers
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