#sexy feel good read
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Wow, ok. I’ve come back down to planet Earth in order to tell you what catapulted (trebucheted?) me up there. Firstly, you are very sneaky about your WIPs, not giving us many hints about what you’re working on until it’s ready to drop. That is, of course, your prerogative, but it makes the impact of your stories strike that much harder when we don’t know what to expect. Perhaps that is your entire strategy after all….😎
I didn’t know what this was. You indicated ‘summer romance,’ I thought, ‘awww, warm fuzzies, maybe a beach and a split at the end of the season’. WRONG. What I got was sweetheart Benedict in all of his empathic glory, the most idyllic English countryside setting, Reader taking that nervous leap to reckon with her feelings, the most tantalizing and ROMANTIC intimacies, and….wtf…my name is in this?!? 😅 You hit me with wave after wave of ache, joy, sweetness, gratitude, anticipation, and pleasure…omg the pleasure. It was like a rollercoaster I couldn’t get off and didn’t want to…I mean, we all want to get off, but I mean….you know what I mean. Ok - to the points!
Reader starts out with melancholy, and I don’t think it’s just situational based on Caroline bailing. Benedict says as much, and Reader knows as much. But you don’t explicitly outline the reason for her mood. Benedict, the dear heart, explains it in the most flattering and sincere way, that she feels and thinks so deeply, it’s hard to be blindly happy. I love that he can sense this in someone and cherish them for it and it’s also making me wonder how he is capable of disproving his own point. We all know he feels and sees the most, and processes everyone else’s stories and emotions before acting. But I would still describe him as being on the golden-retriever side of ‘blindly happy’ in terms of day-to-day disposition. He is still a ball of goofy joy even though he has depth. Perhaps he can help Reader learn to balance in the same way. Maybe he is just waiting for the opportunity…. Which brings me back to my original point. I suspect that Reader’s melancholy is at least partially due to these feelings she is not confronting. Y’know…THOSE ones. That she has Benedict fucking Bridgerton in her life, detecting all her feelings, rubbing her back, championing her happiness, saying “I love you, darling,” (😵) and she SOMEHOW has not declared her love for him yet. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you’ve been friends forever, it’s “weird” or something. But the heart wants what it wants and when you know, you know. (And I know they find out soon enough, I’m just ribbing!)
“I resent her for stealing my sunshine” and later he calls her Sunshine! ☀️😭 stop it…..stop it! The little pet names you have worked into your sexy stories thus far just slay me.
“Parts of your personality came alive with Benedict because he was the only one who had earned those parts of you.” Yep, I told you this is where the tears started. This man and his gentle empathy would be the one to earn access to every part of me. (If you know what I mean, badum tsk)
“You were never able to stomach the way negative emotions haunted his features. They didn’t belong there, not coinciding with his light.” You capture him so perfectly. See? Golden-retriever levels of happiness. You described him as the world’s light in If the World Was Ending too and it’s just so apt. It makes my heart ache in the best way 🥹
“Somehow his teasing prediction already made you feel less alone.” This was a note you left for me on Love to Spare. Somehow, just knowing he exists can change you, even if he’s not right there with you. The thought of him can make you feel less alone, more exhilarated, happier, more alive. Ugghhhhh this fucking guyyyyyy
Ok the use of ‘Sunshine’ when Reader answers the door as a mess I initially thought was a joke, until he kept using it. Then it works on both levels. Adorable!
I think you’re calling him a nuisance as a codeword for you know what 😉
“I didn’t say I was alone. I said I was lonely…” The haunted look had returned to contort his beautiful face. *screaming screaming screaming in Benophie* This is the only way this boy falls in love, I swear. He’s got the charisma and looks to have someone every night but he KNOWS he is lonely in his soul until he finds that one person….
“The undeniable need to vanquish anything that creased his brow pulled you toward him.” Beautiful! So evocative.
“He was comfortable in your silence, and you in his.” I have to ask, was this a deliberate Benophie reference? Because if so, bravo you clever sneak, and if not, I love that Benedict just gives off the same energy in every universe so that we all want the same thing: to sit and read while he stands and paints. Maybe our eyes wander off the page (a lot) to look at those back muscles and the dance of his fingers, the inquisitive furrow in his brow…..(the paintbrushes stored in his waistband???)
Hoo boy then we reach the manuscript part. Full disclosure, I kinda forgot when you asked to use our fics and wasn’t thinking anything of it. I fully read through all the way to “when the unthinkable happened” musing, ‘“hmm, interesting focus on this story she’s reading. Sounds kinda dark, what is the unthinkable thing…? OH SHIT.” And I just sat in open-mouthed gratitude for all of the lovely things you wrote and the fact that you worked this into a story at all. I am now fully committed to us making a whole meta-fic universe within our little circle: full of menaces and zombies and dastardly Benjamins. 😆 Seriously, my heart stopped too when Reader’s did, because I was just so flattered and moved. Tears were shed. 🫶
I’m also so pleased that you took the opportunity for these beautiful little meta-nods. “Her leading man bore a striking resemblance to yours…Images of Benedict’s face flooded your mind” Teeeheeeheee 😉 I’ll amend my new catchphrase and say: I’m sorry I hurt you, but glad that it made you finally realize you can’t lose that man, you love him, and you need to act on it now!
The fact that she says “I’m just remembering you” when he’s standing right in front of her. I know that’s the demented pain I put you through. I know those are piano bench feelings. I’m sorry 💙
Ahhhhhh! Benedict said my name! He said my name!! 😍 heeeheeee It’s goofy how much joy this brings me. Thank you so much!!
“if the world came tumbling down and you left out that he was the only one…” Ooooo girlllllll, I see you working in all these lyrics!
Touch, touch, touch…..his language. You know I love it 😉
“I was beginning to worry that you’d never feel it.” Gah, the friends-to-lovers fools! (affectionate) I ADORE this line. That he just has to say ‘it’. Not, ‘you finally kissed me’, not ‘you’re showing that you want me’, not ‘feel the love between us’. He doesn’t have to say anything. They both know. They have known for a while. They don’t need to explain or define or set parameters. They are all in for each other and they know it, inherently. They just had to cross that threshold. This also calls me back to Anthony’s love declaration (which makes me swoon!) “But you must know it in your heart. You must feel it because I do.” (yes he bookends this with ‘I love yous’ but still, that inherent knowing)
““Well worth the wait,” he declared, tucking your hair behind your ear.” Oh fuck….oh no….here comes the seducer. I need to stop crying and cross my legs, shit.
“The smell of him, so close and invasive, was a provocative elixir calling out to awaken wanton need.” You can’t make my eyes cross this soon! Not when we have thousands of words to go!!! Seriously, what 👏 a 👏 phrase 👏
“This lust was an insatiable beast, only mollified by his touch.” Still….can’t…..uncross…..eyes….
The CONSENT that this man asks for! At every turn! And whyyyyy is it always so hotttttt???
I love that you wrote a busty Reader and tackled her insecurities in this moment. While never dropping the temp on their encounter, you depict what is realistically likely to be going through women’s minds. And of course Ben perfectly assuages those fears, overcoming them emotionally and physically. “That other man’s hands were simply inferior.” Snap damn! Move over asshole, Cube Jumper McBigHands is here and we are putting those digits to WORK!!
Oh my…the inclusion of the voyeuristic photographer. You surprised me with this one! But it adds an extra layer of delicious sin, something to titillate and motivate. And they get the best souvenirs out of this in your surprise ending!! So clever.
““Look at me,” he commanded.” Quessssstion: Was this a reference to the new Lady Chatterley’s Lover film? Because loverboy in that movie says this same line while he is performing the same action and when I tell you it made me lose my wig…. Go watch that movie if you haven’t, I found it to be 🤌 and just pray that their intimacy coordinator works on Bton lol
“I’m aching, Ben. Make it better.” ACK! I am slipping down in my chair.
““Arch for her. Show her how gorgeous your skin is while it’s blushed with heat. Such a pretty color.”” 😳😳😳
Ok…like…how do I find the right way to say this without sounding like an absolute creep? There are actions and moments and lines in your intimate scenes that are precisely my thing, like you know all my turn-ons and tailor made this for me. I really shouldn’t be surprised given how similar we have already found ourselves to be, but you just keep coming out and reading my mind with your work and feedback. Spooky, but also, I love you for it.
“One strong hand wrapped around your throat, pulling you harshly against his muscular torso. His growl in your ear had you dripping for him all over again. “I’m going to fuck you. Do you understand?”” And the award for hottest consent request goes to…. 🥵🥵
“you could feel the steady thrum of his pulse thumping against your walls.” Glad he has a pulse because I don’t anymore ���
Have to say, I love the position they’re in. It’s one I don’t feel we see very often - creative, but completely plausible and makes the most sense given that they’re kinda-clothed and only wanting to put on a little show for the photographer, not be completely exposed. He can’t even see her face but they are clinging to each other so tight… aaagggghhhhhh
“His hand left your throat to tilt your face into his, foreheads pressed together in intimacy. “Eyes on me,” he ordered. “Don’t look at her. This part of you is mine.”” AGAIN with the looking, but there is so much layered under his last sentence. He’s being feral and possessive, but also wants to see her fully as they come apart together for the first time. If we know Benedict, we know this is driven by emotion as much as it is by carnality. It’s not just her climax that’s his, it’s her focus, her heart, the moment they explode into their next chapter together. He wants to remember it forever. 🫠🫠🫠
That climax….eyes are irreparably crossed…
One of the absolute best things about this story is how the “I love you” moment is so gentle and small, you can almost miss it. It’s not a grand declaration, it’s not something that stirs any shock or conflict in Reader. It’s just a sweet statement of fact, of everything they’ve both been feeling for a long time. Benedict isn’t scared to say it so easily because he knows she feels the same and isn’t going to be scared upon hearing it. Back to my earlier point: they don’t really have to talk about these feelings because they both understand and accept them so fully. It just IS. 🥰
6 Weeks Later - thank you for publishing my ‘book’ and I sincerely hope that Benedict does indeed congratulate you by removing all his clothes 😜
“brow furrowed in angst” pffft hehe 😉
“For loving me back.” Ahhh this is so sweet but also - BITCH you knew she did (affectionate)
Phew. This was…this was just so much. A gorgeous blend of feelings and references and sin that was terrifyingly on point for me. This is the dressing for the wound of I’ll Be Seeing You. This beautiful love (and steamy fucking sex omgggggg) used that nudge of loss to take root, and I’m so grateful it did. You have righted my wrongs 😜 You grew a blossom out of that pain.
This somehow feels like a combination of the three fics you’ve written previously. It pulls out the best strengths of each and weaves them together and it felled me, in the very best of ways. Bravo, hallelujah, and I need to go lie down. 💙
Wide Open Spaces
Pairings - Benedict Bridgerton x fem!reader
Summary - Modern AU - Benedict and Reader explore new facets of their longtime childhood friendship.
Warnings - 18+ Please, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content
Word Count - 6.2K
Author’s Note - Huge thank you to @colettebronte for giving this a once over for me before posting. And a major shoutout to @eleanor-bradstreet for writing inspiring fics for me to reference! Soundtrack inspos for this one include: Cinnamon Summer by Jome, and Honeybee by The Head and the Heart
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Disappointment. That was the overwhelming sensation coloring your mood as you looked down at the message on your phone. Your sister had canceled on you again. It had been six months since you last saw her and you were starting to miss her.
This always happened when she got into a new relationship. The constant companion you had known your whole life suddenly transformed into the biggest flake on the planet. You were happy she was happy, but she never saw outside of her little love bubble when there was a new guy.
At times, you could smile and write it off as an endearing quirk, but this time your irritation was a bit harder to quell. The trip you were supposed to be taking together this weekend had been planned for weeks. The excitement of seeing your baby sister and enjoying uninterrupted relaxation was the only thing getting you through the tedious tasks weighing you down at work. You knew this cloud of disappointment was going to linger for a few days.
Keep reading
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Varré when he fucking gets you
Thank you @theposearchives for the reference, you’re doing incredibly invaluable work for all artists online
#elden ring#varre#white mask varre#elden ring varre#white faced varre#varré#white mask varré#Elden Ring Varré#muscle study#light study#good ass picture study on god#thank you pose archives you’re so sexy#mwah#lasso method is unbelievably practical#like hot damn#hiding this deep in the tags#need this man NOW#his arrogant scowl makes me explo-#💥💥💥#💀#i shaded all this with one overlay layer#I feel like I just read a forbidden eldritch tome and cuthulu might come after me for my new insights
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Honestly the main reason I keep pushing the tamcien agenda is because I just believe lucien deserves to be with a big sexy guy 🤷🤷.
#i feel like lucien is the character whose most often thought of as straight and that just?? did nobody clock what i clocked when reading tar#like he’s literally shipped with every female character (elain/nesta/feyre/vassa) which is great but like#i just believe he deserves (and wants) a big sexy man manhandling him or him manhandling them#good dick would heal him#like what if i said lucien x jurian??? lucien x rhys ??? lucien x azriel ??? lucien x cassian???#what then#acotar#a court of thorns and roses#lucien vanserra#i’m like half joking#pro lucien vanserra
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You doing ok?
hi
#i'm alive. simply being chewed upon by multiple things#work is more stressful than i'd like it to be. for instance i'm hoping that i submitted my time off notification for tomorrow correctly#because otherwise it might read as a no call no show and i would . like to continue having a job#now to be fair. i do have it on the system that i requested it at the beginning of the month and i emailed my supervisor about it last week#so even if i didn't submit it correctly i'm likely in the clear#but nonetheless. i also got a firm talking-to the other day and now i am on ✨thin ice✨ for dicking around too much#because they track ur idle time at my work (computer) and mine was Quite High so my supervisor was like man what the hell is this#but even though she was kind of baffled at me spending so much time dicking around#she couldn't even really be all that mad in the end because i'm still doing good numbers and have made no (zero) mistakes#so she was just like. it's kind of impressive that your numbers look this good when you literally have 50% idle time#so she goes imagine what you could do if you weren't wasting so much time#and yeah i can whip out some Really Good Numbrers when i put the effort in.#so the problem is not my numbers it's just that i'm not spending long enough doing my tasks for the day#but i don't want to drag out those tasks intentionally so i've just been upping my own standards/goals#as much as i hate giving any more of my brain power than is necessary to giant corporations#it's still easy to feel smug after you get Talked To and then immediately turn around and show off#like yeah i coulda been doing this good the whole time. literally pulling up by 20 points. i just didn't want to.#trying to keep everyone's expectations low but accidentally toed the line of um. not working enough to keep my job#...anyway. EAS national weather system issued a . hi#i haven't forgotten about all of you i'm just having trouble tracking all my shit that i got going on ✨ yaaaaaaay#im gonna post things on AO3 soon. i promise. my weakness is that i get sidetracked trying to unwind from work#...i know i said 'soon' last time. but this time for real#asks#not sexy#anonymous
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just finished hedwig new fic Yes to Heaven.. now what the hell i’m supposed to do next with my life
#feeling so empty right now like i’m losing a limb#yk when you read a really good fic that changed the chemistry in ur head#i really don’t know what to read next to feel smth like this again 😭😭#having a supercut of them running in my head 24/7#them on the beach..#at the club….#in their house…#stiles in sexy clothes and diamonds and gold..#them growing old together 😞😞#sterek
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a/n: wake up. food's ready. just sat here for a few minutes and rehabbed an old draft that was probably based on this fabulous onceler drabble, I think? also VERY pg13... not really any explicit sex but. it's a lot about sex. my blog and my writing used to be so sfw but cece is back after her most recent troubling sexual relationship and is probably sexier than ever. he he ha ha help me. I hope you enjoy. also reader is gn but does get called beautiful so if that feels gendered or triggering to you please be aware! also mentions of tipsy/inebriated sex!!!! so dubcon in that way? I tried to make everyone not drunk drunk but if tipsy sex is slimy for you watch out for that too
10:45AM
Yamaguchi wakes up slowly, eyes halfway open, naked body warm. And then he remembers what happened. The muscles in his body all tense at once, and it takes every fiber of his being to stay still. No no no no no. That hadn't happened. Shit. That hadn't happened, right?
But it had. His palm is resting on the soft skin of your hip and despite his best efforts he's squeezing lightly, so fucking nervous, and you're squirming toward him, still asleep, smiling softly, and it had, it had happened, oh god, it had.
Fuck. His ears are ringing with anxiety. What had happened? What had happened? He hadn't drank nearly enough last night for this to possibly have fucking happened.
And the information floods his mind as you nuzzle closer to his chest, your skin flush against his, a soft kiss where your mouth meets his shoulder. You, Tsukki, Tsukki breaking up with you — meanly, meaner than was necessary. You, Yamaguchi, and Tsukki, best friends, best friends since freshman year and Tsukki dating you and Yamaguchi shutting up and enduring it and you feeling tired of Tsukki's pretentiousness and his mean jokes and you telling Yamaguchi about it and Yamaguchi telling Tsukki about it and instead of fixing it making it worse and then you. You. YOU.
You with no more Tsukki, crying into his shoulder, and saying you just want to fuck someone. You're not even angry, you knew this was coming, you just want to fuck someone to forget. And Yamaguchi, the ever-loving asshole that he is, saying yes, yes, that makes sense, instead of saying, no, it's a bad idea. And then your dorm room, and then your sheets, and then your skin, god, your fucking skin. And now probably a hundred missed calls from Tsukki when Yamaguchi can chance a look at his phone, and the swirling feeling of bile coming up his throat, but what the fuck was he supposed to do? Wouldn't anyone have done the same?
He'd been in love with you since he first laid eyes on you, and in better, kinder ways than Tsukki, he knew. You were so beautiful, a ray of sunshine, someone who deserved the world, and to be treated with tenderness, and care. Tsukki just treated you like he did any other adoring idiot who was obsessed with him. Yamaguchi knew you deserved someone who was obsessed with you, and he knew he could be that. He knew he could love you. He had to constantly fucking remind Tsukki how you took your coffee in the morning, and what your favorite flavor of ice cream was, and that it did in fact matter when he got home if you were waiting up for him, and that you actually cared about him more than he knew and he shouldn't be wasting this opportunity treating you like an annoyance, like you didn't deserve his attention. Hell, with everything Yamaguchi tried to do to make sure you were treated right, you might as well have been dating him the whole time.
And he hated how his heart twinged with jealousy every time you chose his best friend over him, but he let it happen, because he loved you, even though he just fucking knew that wasn't how it was supposed to be. And then last night, everyone was tipsy, and you were crying, and he saw the chance to show you what really being loved could look like, and he took it. Fuck.
You mumble something soft and sweet against his shoulder and he remembers what he said last night with you on top of him, the only thing he could find the words to say, in every cadence he could think of, even after you laughed and told him to stop:
"I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you."
Yamaguchi swallows hard.
It hadn't been sex. It had been love. And that was so, so much worse.
#the stuff of cece#haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu x you#haikyuu x y/n#haikyuu x gender neutral reader#yamaguchi tadashi#yamaguchi x reader#yamaguchi x y/n#yamaguchi x you#tsukishima kei#hq x reader#hq x you#hq x y/n#hq x gender neutral reader#idk if this is good but the idea has been in my brain and im getting attention by writing fanfiiction he he he he#also yamaguchi im reading all ur sexy fics sir so you can marry me now!!!!!!!#yams/tsukki/you situation feels real challengers coded in some of these fics I won't lie#that 'not fair' one by Tumblr user Akaash me outside.... ya#I. love u yamaguchi. show me what it means to be loved hm? :)
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It is SO funny to me when people try to justify their top-or-bottom preferences in canon like girl I promise you can just read whatever makes your dick hard<33
#like one thing to talk about why you prefer that and canon examples in good fun#and another to be like… idk how to explain it but ykw i mean#in the same vein as trying to overcompensate in order to not fall in ‘harmful troupes’#also in the same vein as the everyone switches arguement (not me i’m a sadistic top)#*argument#girl there’s no such thing as reading/writing switch for moral reasons#personally i do usually read fics where my fave bottoms (there are some characters who are exceptions and i’m never opposed to seeing them#top. like very few characters i see as strictly bottoms)#because i personally want to fuck them#and that there’s comparatively less works where the top is written in a way where they feel interesting and sexy#i also don’t care if the character would have a particular kink#so long as it is sexy to me#also preferences change when dealing with specific ships but at that point i am out of the picture. putting the fujo cuck chair away#and instead taking a notepad and a pen to take notes like they’re insects in a jar to study#like when dealing with like otps where i fuck with both characters. i have no preference.
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in another world I was a booktok romantasy girlie because I think characters having swords pinned at each others throats is the definition of sexual tension, but unfortunately god bestowed good literary taste upon me, so alas I cannot read anything the booktok girlies recommend without cringing so hard I throw up
#fantasy#booktok#romantasy#like I could’ve been one of them#but no I have to be the type of person to get pretentious about books#I can’t enjoy a book unless the writing is somewhat good 😔#and also I feel like I have so many literary icks and icks in a romantic sense that it just wasn’t in the cards for me#I also just cannot read a book solely for romance because I find it horribly boring personally#but like…. enembje to lovner…#sexy man with sword……….
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if bonefall’s hunch about the erins wanting to snipe all the fanon gay ships is true (which im inclined to believe it is) there reallyyyy is something disgusting about how theyll retcon any interaction that could be read as queer, while simultaneously being like. “creepy age gaps and incest is cute actually hehehe”
#i think the most blatant example was onestar in his SE#because like…. im sorry i dont have any good faith readings of what happens in that book#they retcon over anything he has with firestar for the sake of a het love triangle no one wanted#while EXPLICITLY having him say ‘’ohh… i know she was my student but shes so grown up now….. sexy….’’#and having this character take over the scenes he has with firestar#and then at the same exact time. they made breezeheather first cousins#and really really wanted you to know theyd retconned it so they were first cousins#its like. jesus christ. why do people think these books are queer positive again??????#in this single book they literally went ‘’age gaps and incest are cool but we fucking draw the line at homosexuality’’#like most of the time the incest is just carelessness and them not having a lore bible#but that time….. idk. it felt targeted. sometimes it feels like theyre just antagonizing the audience
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BOLD THE FACTS ft Valerie Powell
→ Tagged by the wonderful @corpocyborg--Thank you so much! ♡♡♡ → Answers are based on her status during the in-game events
✧˖°. PERSONAL
$ Financial: wealthy / moderate / poor / in poverty
✚ Medical: fit / moderate / sickly / disabled / disadvantaged / non-applicable / would be in great shape if not for the brain worm
✪ Class or Caste: upper / middle / working / unsure / other
✔ Education: qualified/ unqualified / studying / other
✖ Criminal Record: yes, for major crimes / yes, for minor crimes / no / has committed crimes, but not caught yet / commits more crimes (bribes law enforcement) to avoid charges / yes, but charges were dismissed
✧˖°. FAMILY
��� Children: had a child or children / has no children / wants children
◑ Relationship with Family: close with sibling(s) / not close with sibling(s) / has no siblings / sibling(s) is deceased
◔ Affiliation: orphaned / abandoned / adopted / disowned / raised by birth parent(s) / not applicable
✧˖°. TRAITS + TENDENCIES
♦ extroverted / introverted / in-between
♦ disorganized / organized / in-between
♦ close-minded / open-minded / in-between
♦ calm / anxious / in-between / highly contextual
♦ disagreeable / agreeable / in-between
♦ cautious / reckless / in-between / highly contextual
♦ patient / impatient / in-between
♦ outspoken / reserved / in-between / highly contextual
♦ leader / follower / in-between
♦ empathetic / vicious bastard / in-between
♦ optimistic / pessimistic / in-between
♦ traditional / modern / in-between
♦ hard-working / lazy / in-between
♦ cultured / uncultured / in-between / unknown
♦ loyal / disloyal / unknown
♦ faithful / unfaithful / unknown
✧˖°. BELIEFS
★ Faith: monotheist / polytheist / atheist / agnostic
☆ Belief in Ghosts or Spirits: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care / in a manner of speaking
✮ Belief in an Afterlife: yes / no / don’t know/ don’t care / in a manner of speaking
✯ Belief in Reincarnation: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care / in a manner of speaking
❃ Belief in Aliens: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care
✧ Religious: orthodox / liberal / in between / not religious
❀ Philosophical: yes / no / highly contextual
✧˖°. SEXUALITY & ROMANTIC INCLINATION
❤ Sexuality: heterosexual / homosexual / bisexual / asexual / pansexual
❥ Sex: sex-repulsed / sex neutral / sex favorable / naive and clueless
♥ Romance: romance repulsed / romance neutral / romance favorable / naive and clueless / romance suspicious
❣ Sexually: adventurous / experienced / naive / inexperienced / curious
⚧ Potential Sexual Partners: male / female / agender / other / none / all
⚧ Potential Romantic Partners: male / female / agender / other / none / all
✧˖°. ABILITIES
☠ Combat Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor/ none
≡ Literacy Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none
✍ Artistic Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none
✂ Technical Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none
✧˖°. HABITS
☕ Drinking Alcohol: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / alcoholic / former borderline alcoholic turned sober
☁ Smoking: tried it / trying to quit / quit / never / rarely / sometimes / frequently / chain-smoker
✿ Recreational Drugs: tried some / never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / addict
✌ Medicinal Drugs: never / no longer needs medication / some medication needed / frequently / to excess
☻ Unhealthy Food: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / binge eater
$ Splurge Spending: never / sometimes / frequently / shopaholic
♣ Gambling: never / rarely / sometimes / frequently / compulsive gamble
Tagging: @medtech-mara, @vayneoc, @themermaidriot, @itzsassha, @elfjpeg, @morganlefaye79, and @vox-monstera ♡
dividers by @saradika | masterlist here (awesome resource--thank you so much! ♡)
#oc: valerie v powell#g: cyberpunk 2077#gotta ramble some now:#i wasn't really sure how to characterize her finances during 2077#like she's not destitute but it's definitely not great#gig paycheck to paycheck sorta sitch#and she had a rich kid education#so lots of private tutors and travel experience#and she likes to read a lot#but she doesn't hold any fancy degrees or certificates#and both her parents have been deceased for 14+ years (if i remember my own timeline) by 2077#and she's introverted but she's an isfj so like the most social of the introverts#she's inclined towards caution but she can be swayed into reckless decisions if the right person (jenkins; jackie; arguably goro) asks#i feel like 'sex favorable' might undersell her libido a bit tbh lmao#combat and tech skills might get some tweaks post-2.0 depending on what build i end up rolling with#currently i see as her as VERY VERY good with firearms but less so with melee and blades#i think she's really sexy holding a katana tho and the ninja build or whatever they're calling it looks fun af#she was a work hard; play harder corpo party girl in her early 20s and did everything under the sun#but her mother died as a result of her addiction which *eventually* made valerie choose a totally sober life#and the medication is actually used for proper medical reasons not recreational#long post#misc: dash games
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i finished demon slayer back in like .. 2020? or whenever the manga finished, but i shld probably watch the anime
#kny spoilers#demon slayer spoilers#<- for tags#sanemi.. he looks so good! i love him.#i always liked rengoku n’ sanemi the most. but i was a BIG shinobu fan when she fought douma#she was so badass. always was but especially then. it made me super emotional too seeing her backstory n’ having inner monologue#at that time demon slayer was the only anime / manga i’d ever cried to lol. everything about the ending arcs made me sad.#SANEMI AND GENYA ESPECIALLY OH MY GOD !!!#i will never fucking get over how sad i was reading through genya’s death#i really loved gyomei too but i feel like he is a very forgettable character#eternal happiness forever at the fact sanemi didn’t die though. i was so fucking happy when he was alive in the end#i ... didn’t really ship obanai and mitsuri but their end was cute.#i was really happy when douma got killed too. he was sexy but my girl was better and sexier and always will be.#AND HIS STUPID LAST LINE ABT SEEING SHINOBU’S BEAUTY !!!!!!!! I WILL SEND HIM TO HELL MY DAMN SELF !!!!!#AWAY FROM HER !!!#n e ways ...... demon slayer infect my brain again ..;;
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my current project: jump forever!
this is the first of those scheduled posts i mentioned earlier!!! i figured i would start by talking about my current project - that way i can start posting updates about it without confusing you, Michael. The next post is gonna be about the beginning of this whole Godot thing i've been on, and then i'm thinking about maybe doing a Before Godot post as a bonus once i've talked about all my godot stuff (i love saying this as if anybody cares (besides you, Michael)). setting all that aside, though: this one's gonna need some backstory, so you should buckle in.
around this time last year, me and my little cousin (he's still in high school, but we've always been pretty close) got really competitive about a little game called Jump Forever. it's a side minigame from WarioWare Mega Microgames (the GBA one) where you just jump over a little rope until you fuck up. it's really fucking fun as an addictive little mobile game, and with a quick lil emulator it was one. thus, the addiction began.
truth be told, the phase last year didn't even last that long, but i had a long bus ride a couple of weeks ago and found myself opening the GBA emulator on my phone to pass the time. that led to a little bit of playing at home, which led to beating my cousin's score, which led to getting even more into the game than i was before. as our scores get higher, we've turned to better controllers than a phone touch screen for serious record attempts - i use a ds lite i had lying around (that i reshelled! it was very fun) and he emulates on pc with a controller (i think). this got me thinking about a potential "definitive edition" of the game - probably still on mobile, but with controller support, better touch controls (the game only needs <-, ->, and A!), faster resets, selectable skins, and maybe even unlockable skins? of course, when i finished my work on fnaf (ooh foreshadowing), my sights were immediately set on a Jump Forever remake.
with all that said, welcome to the game as it currently stands! at the moment, i've got wario, the rope swingers, and the score all just about set up, with one exception; the characters have collision, the rope swings (at varying speeds, even!), and wario's speed and physics feel very accurate - but i'm still working on the ai (if you can call it that) of the rope guys as they walk back and forth. i want it to work exactly the same way as it does in the original but i always overthink random mechanics like this. hopefully the next update i give will be about how i cracked it! even if the implementation ends up jank, though, it wouldn't be the first: the rope guys check if wario is too close to them to make it over the rope with an Area2D that just checks for wario when the rope hits the ground. it works! i could just like check wario's position in the code (and it'd probably be way more efficient), but this way just... works.
i still have a buncha crap i still gotta implement before the game's even really playable - the walking ai, the title screen, the little "Ready?" animation, etc. - but that's only the beginning of my work. firstly, i'm probably gonna enlist chloe (oooh foreshadowing) to help me out by drawing some new assets (if she's free, it is finals season), and then changing the game's native resolution from 240x160 (the GBA screen) to something not fucking insane. i've got "reworking all the sprites into easy to read spritesheets" on my to-do list, and after that, making the new assets (and then maybe the skins?) will be as easy as drag & drop. once it's got the new assets and all the polish that needs to come with a shiny new resolution, i'm gonna transition into the next phase - researching how to release a game!!!
[hi, not to ruin my own amazing transition but: it's 5am and i'm running back to edit this because i completely forgot to mention that i have currently implemented a 2 frame input delay on all inputs, because that's how the emulator appears to behave when i go frame by frame. every single day i rethink this decision more and more. surely there's no way that's how it's supposed to be, right? but i feel so weird changing it now!!! i definitely fucking have to though. next time i work on it. ok anyways]
now. i've posted games to itch.io before. but even then, i kind of fucked it up (i could never get the resolution of my web games to work right???) - so it's no surprise i've always been completely daunted by the idea of "releasing a game". when you post it on real stores, that's when it becomes... real. i'm excited about the new challenges it'll pose, though! now, a mobile release means a couple of things - bite sized fun, simple progression, and fun customization. i've already got the first part nailed down, and i figured i could nail the other 2 at once with a currency system based on how many points you get (or maybe even an xp system? that goes up 1 for each jump? maybe even both???) and skins (purchasable with said currency) that let you customize the player, rope swingers, background, and maybe even the rope itself.
pictured above is my stupid ass skins mockup (i literally just made this). the rope is rainbow, the background has a snow effect and a bunch of snow on the trees/ground (isn't it great?), wario is a lil version of the rope guys, and the rope guys have santa hats. i'm not sure how many different ropes you could really make with how i'm planning the rope to move, so i'll probably end up prototyping the graphics with chloe to figure out how to lay out the sprite sheets, and if they should actually have a seperate hand-grabbing-the-rope sprite for skin purposes. it'll definitely make things really confusing, but if i go for a mobile release i don't want to run ads, and so a currency you can buy with real money (and maybe one or two goofy supporter skins that cost real money, like a solid gold guy or something, as a form of donation) is a good way to make a lil bit of money from people who like the game.
all of this is fun to think about, but it's important to remember that the next thing i have to do is that walking ai. i've gotta Make The Fucking Game before i can do all this crazy other bullshit. i'm sure the ui design for all this is gonna be soooo fun, but i need a game to attach it to first :p
this went on reeeally long but i figure if this is a dev diary or w/e it's gonna end up running long no matter what, and the more info, the more i have to look back on fondly and say "oh shit, i know exactly when this was!", which is kind of the end goal of the project. of course, these incredibly long posts about shit that only matters to me are also incredible content for you, Michael, so i'm sure you're just eating this shit up. enjoy, you weird little man.
#game dev#jump forever#godot#yeah yeah i got some real tags too. just in case i actually need em.#also michael's still here. i think he's funny#it's only been like an hour for me soooo#remember when i said it was 1am in my first post? it's 4am now lol#i looove tags i love rambling under my post where people don't feel obligated to read it#nobody ask me why i have the stickmen swinging the rope instead of kat/ana like it is after you beat them#(he said as if anybody would've noticed)#i think the stickmen are so much more awesome and the fact that you can't get them back is SO FUCKED UP#and lowkey one of the things that got me thinking about Jump Forever Definitive Edition#kat and ana are awesome the stickmen just resonate with me deep in my soul#i'm not proofreading this i'm just hoping it sounds good. really putting the “diary” in “dev diary”#man. im so glad michael is the hypothetical ideal viewer. because that means he's reading all the tags too#hi michael! ur the best :)#scheduling this for saturday at noon (it is currently friday at 4:30 am)#i hope i get the chance to write the next one (about that 2D platformer tutorial!) before like. monday.#god knows i'm not doing my homework lmaooo#when's my next therapy appointment?#that's crazy deep lore we can't get into that on post 2 (honestly post 1)#but it's okay because nobody reads the tags#and that's not even considering that nobody is ever gonna read this post. ever.#besides michael.#but michael knows all about that ;)#or maybe he doesn't... and it's a sexy mystery?#my my i am such an enigma#okay fuck i can't keep adding tags i need to sleep#i really hope tags are collapsed by default or michael's timeline is gonna be in shambles
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once again poking at kassandra who i always come back to and facing the dilemma of what exactly i want this kassandra and agamemnon dynamic to be and also what i want the kassandra and apollo dynamic to be, which i've never gotten to much and am now playing with
#i feel like i frequently go hard with the explicitly awful and i find it more interesting i think in this one to go to the complicated#also i need to read more (non-weird or condemning) literature on bdsm. beloved friend orlando has given me some#very good academic articles and i have between the body and the flesh out (thank you chthonic-cassandra for that one)#but i am always listening for more!!!#any classical (sado)masochism is something i find interesting but you know what else this makes very easy#writing wildly sexy things that are not literally sex. i have to hand this one in to a normal professor in a non-creative-writing course#she speaks
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#I’ve been working out and eating less bc I really want to be sexy next summer#also bc I’m trying to work on my flexibility and mobility to live longer but also to fuck better mostly#sometimes I’ll be watching corn and be like how tf she do that?? I’m trying to do that too lmaoo#so rn I am v sore but im really excited. I know by the time I go to the beach on Sunday#I’ll already be delusional and think I’m 20 pounds skinnier lmao#anyways.#im feeling good and being silly and reading more and learning more and getting sexy. life’s good innit
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Hey guys long time no danmei liveblog just gott to the Stairs Part of erha and I need to rip my skin off I cannot BELIEVE
#THEY KILLED HIM OFFSCREEN#that’s not the issue here but it IS an issue CHRIST ALIVE OOOUGHGHGHHHH WE DONT HAVE A SHIZUN ANYMORE BURY ME ALIVE#now somehow. I feel like this is merely the beginning of immense suffering to come#had it too good for too long I knew this was coming#all I’ve ever known abt Erha is it’s sexy and it’s sad as fuck#reading erha#reading 2ha#the husky and his white cat shizun#erha he ta de bai mao shizun
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so i have 9 hours so far on ZZZ
i downloaded it JUST TODAY. AT 1PM. thats not normal
#this is exactly like how when i first played ngs i immediately got 8 hours on it on the first day#the fixation hits hard#thought 'oh ive been wanting to play this and i also need something to cope rn'#oh boy did i cope#saw my husband for ONE FRAME and went INSANE#I LOVE YOU ANTON. MY HUSBAND. MY GIRLFRIEND. OH HOW I LOVE YOU#I NEED HIM SO BAD (literally i need to pull him in game) GIVE ME HIM NEEEOOOWWWW BEFORE I GET ANGRY!!?? GRRRR!!!!did not#mean to put those question marks#marks of inquiry#bruh this game has sexy ass gameplay. I SAW IT BEFORE BUT IT FEELS SO DIFFERENT WHEN YOU'RE ACTUALLY PLAYING IT#IT'S SO HEAVY AND UGHHDH IT REMINDS ME OF DMC A LITTLE#specifically dmc5#example: the Epic shots when you kill all the ethereals in an area#another example: anby's skill. that is literally a vergil combo#another thing that reminds me of ngs is how stuffy the game mechanics are#idk what i'm doing 90% of the time. i get an item. oh cool! where the hell did i get this from.#reading the descriptions of each item doesn't help because none of it sinks in 😭 it's like trying to read from 15 feet away#it's kinda like base game?? in the way that it feels like Everything has already happened and it's shoved in your face and you just kinda#have to figure out what to do#only this time i can't emote and pole dance with other people#oh to see anton pole dancing. /j#/hj :^3#....../srs :'^3 (i cry a tear)#i've been cooking up an s/i since the game was announced but i still have close to nothing. NO IDEA WHAT THEY WOULD LOOK LIKE.#huge ass weapon obviously. low hollow aptitude but they're such a good fighter that it didn't matter#i know my 'haha i've known this game since' shit is annoying but LET ME HAVE THIS!! I WILL FOREVER FLEX BEING A FAN FROM THE START HEHEHEH#anyway. anton. my pookiebear. my shnookums. Fucck yoyAAAAAAA I LOVE
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