#sexuality is an aspect of life; fine but it sort of doesn't seem like that's it...more like they're in a ship war

[fideidefenswhore]

"other people are interesting too!" would be a lot more nice if it wasn't just demanding their fave got the most media. I mean they aren't exactly unbiased in this. if Js had all the media they wouldn't want it stopped to give Ab a fair chance. Js and Coa are still 2 of the famous 6 wives. it not as if we never hear about them. as media goes, they don't do too bad. not like medieval queens or even just tudor men. I don't hear no one saying let's have a show all about Philip sidney or they wish Henry fitzroy got more representation or whatever. i mean, it could be worse for antis

I would say COA is by far, also the most venerated and remembered as "the true Queen", but yes, they are both famous for that reason.

I mean, as far as JS goes, there is content, but most of them don't seem interested (I'm speaking of Instagram circles but it seems like the only one they consider 'canon' is Alison Weir's... fascinating because within it she is a sniveling, sanctimonious hypocrite that cries the entire day of Anne Boleyn's coronation at the injustice of her wearing white, since Anne is, of course, a whore that's had premarital sex... then lets Henry hit it raw once Catherine dies [because that becomes when it's morally acceptable to her...tbh, I think this is why it's the one they love this one the most, Jane is #1 COA/Mary I Stan here, it borders on celebrity worship] for five months pre-marriage, wears white upon her own 1st promenade as Queen, doesn't see the irony) in what's out there? I'll be real, I only read May Bride because I was interested in what happened with the whole Catherine Fillol (so like again...is Jane even 'niche'? Do you know who it's really hard to find a novel from the perspective of? Elizabeth Seymour. I was only able to find and check out one from the library) situation and it is almost impossible to find any novels about her, this was like the only one, otherwise I would not bother, I think the Seymours were trash (Margery Wentworth and Elizabeth Cromwell can stay...the rest of the major players, thin ice). I have also read Adrienne Dillard's novel which is half JS-POV, only again for two reasons: 1) I read Raven's Widow and loved it, 2) I've been reading her interviews about this book for years as she's been in-progress in the research and writing stage, she said she had absolutely no interest in romanticizing Henry/Jane, which I was all for... I think that was a very toxic relationship.

I have also, on that note, seen them complain that there are no Henry/Jane sex scenes in any media depictions which is like... I thought you all said he was unequivocally terrible at sex and think the idea of AB having bad sex is funny? Why would you want to see that, if you like Jane...? 

[preciouslittle-bhaalbabe]

It's probably because some arguments are slippery slopes and a sort of taboos, I think.

Given how much media affects real life, people tend to tread carefully when certain topics are brought up. Unfortunately a lot of people tend to misjudge situations because they're so used to it that they seem normal. There are plenty of young people glorifying possessiveness and similar behaviour in relationships. I know that's not book's and videogame's fault, surely, but... isn't it? Are media and arts so detached from the society that we live in? I don't think that the answer is simple and there's a lot to reflect on the multifactoriality of it.

But the fact that people are starting to reflect on this kind of "morality" even if it's just in a bloody game, well, I don't think that's entirely bad. That's even more true when it's about race, sexuality and gender.

Clearly people that attack those who like AA, calling them abusive and whatnot are just plain stupid and out of touch with reality and need to touch some grass. I'm not talking about this kind of people. Those have no excuse for their behaviour, no matter the trauma or frustrations.

I think A!A should never be something people should actively seek out and desire IRL. It's so far removed from anything people would even be able to find anyways. He's a vampire lord who got a bunch of power from a hellish ritual. I think as long as you keep in mind that this is fantasy and fiction it's fine. Of course all those concepts have to come from somewhere, but that doesn't mean you HAVE to seek it out IRL. It's about having discretion, if someone isn't particularly good at that, then absolutely avoid paths like this in media.

And of course know your limits. A!A can be triggering to people. It's not exactly a "healthy" dynamic. He is certainly not for everyone and I personally don't really see a reason to ascend him unless you're doing that evil power hungry route yourself. If your character doesn't view the change as a positive thing, it will end in tragedy. Which is exactly what the writers did and why the breakup is so devastating for both Astarion and the player. I think that's also what people tend to focus on, forgetting there's another path where the player is fine with and encourages his actions (that's also where the kisses have a huge disconnect for many people). There are multiple instances where he asks you if this is what you want and you can fully back out even after agreeing initially. The only time you can't back out is during the epilogue and that's most likely for convenience sake on the devs part. (of course it also makes sense with his character at that point).

I think people can have constructive and healthy conversations about stuff like this without hurling insults at each other. 100% agreed with you there. People don't have to agree with one another, but they don't have to resort to mudslinging to get their point across either. A!A is a touchy subject for alot of people and they can't seem to handle talking about it without "taking a side". I love Astarion in all aspects. I find his character wonderfully written and very immersive. To disregard one of his arcs as simply "evil and abusive" is to write off all the incredible storytelling the devs and writers put into his character.

[whaleofatjme1920]

if requests are still open

begging for any sort of tf2 smut for the defense classes and/or solly bc they're so underrated

General Defense Class and Soldier Smut Thoughts

[GN!Reader, I kept it REALLY general.]

[Warnings: General smut, you know the drill. MINORS DNI. GET OUT.]

[AN: look I have no excuses for why this is taking literal months just- sorry love bug it's here now]

Reblogs are appreciated!

Demoman

A part of me wants to say he's actually,, not a sexual person? Like, he's really playful and flirty but sex is like, he can go without it and be just fine.

But in the case he IS craving that kind of physical intimacy with you, be uh, prepared for possibly whiskey dick. I honestly think he's not too big on penetration if that makes any sense. Like, he'll spend forever between your legs making you feel good and use his fingers. Likes when you touch his dick but actual penetration?

When he IS fucking you, it's actually kind of slow, sweet and romantic! He's not into the whole jackhammer thing nor does he think that sex should be like, porn kink fest y'know?

He has some old fashioned ideas on sex and will refer to it as making love. He really spends his time on you. Doesn't really care about himself as much as getting you off.

Heavy

So, so careful. I think Mikhail is more inclined to taller, not petite partners because he's afraid he'll actually break them otherwise. Even then, he's still afraid he'll hurt you! He knows who he is!

He's also not very kinky, but like, he does have a breeding and slight size kink? Doesn't matter if you're afab or amab, beg him to breed you or fill you up and he'll go feral.

He's a gentle dom. Can't see him being too mean but he will punish you if you step out of line. He's big on spanking and edging, loves hearing you beg and break for him to finally fill you.

He's packing. His dick is BIG. Not so much long but it's thick and will stretch you out. If you're giving him head, good luck!! Lucky if you even get the tip fully in.

Engineer

Another sweetie pie, but I actually think he likes being the sub or the bottom depending. He's a switch/vers but tends to move towards bottoming and subbing. Either way, he'll do what makes you happy.

He's kinda romantic too. Loves to be taken care of and to spoil you. Can and will spend eternity between your legs - like ride his face please!! And then let him cum inside of you. He hates cumming anywhere else than inside of you.

He likes the closeness, really. How your hearts seem to beat in synch when he fills you up, or how you fill him up. He really likes the fullness feeling and he's over the moon if you enjoy that too.

He's a little kinky but not in the way you're expecting, I feel the kink play is that subtle kind that leaks into other aspects of your life like master dynamics and whatnot.

Soldier

Sex with him is.... Interesting. I feel I've touched on this before but to reiterate, it's more of a performance than it actually is sex. Like, he will jackhammer because that's what American men do.

Honestly if you want him to change anything up just insinuate American men do X and it'll somehow get incorporated into the next time he fucks you.

He's always topping and dom. Always. You cannot fight him on this. He likes being ultra macho masculine. Has nice muscles though so enjoy looking at those when he's on top of you.

I think once and a while, you can convince him to be softer and make love. But honestly it's feral, what goes on in your bedroom. Feral, lots of yelling, gets loud, it's.... He eagle screeches at one point or another.

[zodiac-blood]

asexuality with a fetish; but weirder than that somehow

Most of us in the system don't fully label our orientation due to how stressful it can be with headmates blurring, but one identity that has felt the most concrete with me (Tobey writing this) has been Asexuality. Now that identity is also one I have struggled with because well, I have what very obviously seems to be a fetish. It works a bit weird because of my sexuality and my sexuality works a bit weird because of the fetish. I'll explain that a bit further in a bit but I'll try not to get too much into my personal sex life. If you have read previous posts of mine you may know it, but its a hand fetish. (before you make the joke, yes I actually did realize it because of the JoJo character, kinda.) For a while I didn't want to label myself as asexual because of both that, and that I can *tolerate* having sex, not really enjoy it entirely but I don't (usually) get disgusted by it. I've since started realizing that's not the part that matters really, and have been trying to figure out what's up with my specific flavour of sexuality.

I think a very important thing that I have figured out, and is why it took a very long time to figure out what was up with me, is I don't get 'horny' in the way most people do. When I see like a very attractive pair of hands doing something (mostly just something non-sexual oddly), I get what I tend to say is "arousal" but not once will the thought of sex or even kissing come up in my mind. It's more like aggression?? but almost in the way you get "cuteness aggression" where youre not actually angry or wanting to hurt something, the emotions are just so extremely positive that you start getting aggressive. Its like that, but more fight or flight instincts, it makes me want to either hide curled up in a ball crying or punch something; somehow all this is in a very positive way though. Not once will I ever think of trying to do anything sexual and the times I have tried to do something sexual both by myself and with a partner while feeling this way yet it just doesn't help at all. I tend to call this arousal/being horny but it feels more like something else? I am not sure since it has no *actually* sexual nature to it yet is definetly tied so some sort of sexuality and sexual feelings. I don't just see a hand and get weird about it, its only if it sort of matches my type and in certain contexts. That I think is to be expected with a sexual interests though, just wanted to clarify. If someone has more information on this please let me know because it has been very hard to find anything for it and its something I haven't heard anyone talk about. I have briefly mentioned it before and someone commented saying I might have autism but honestly but they never responded to my asking what they meant by that so I don't really understand what that meant and can't find anything on that.

On that, although a bit of a tangent; do not try and diagnose me with something, it is fine to point out if something is a common symptom of something but specific diagnosises stress me out.

I am an individual in a somewhat large group of people sharing a brain, and that makes things kind of weird. I think hands can be really good looking and I even have preferences and specific things I can point to as 'turn-ons' (in the agrressive horny way) and things I consider to be turn-offs (long nails...), yet we are realising that there are some in the system who have different aspects they like, but also most of them don't have that interest at all. I have headmates who most likely have more "normal" sexualities and blurred with them in times that made it really confusing, but I do understand the feeling somewhat of how its "supposed" to be somewhat. I have a specific memory of when we were younger, like middle school aged, I didn't have any understanding of it but I definetly already had the fetish at that point. I had a conversation with a friend about JoJo's Bizarre Adventure, a series I didn't know anything about back then, you probably know where this is going. She started being funny and talking about a character called "Yoshikage Kira", she mentioned that he is known mostly by his hand fetish, and definetly made a point to joke about how weird it was. I don't know how much about myself I really was understanding at that point but I definetly just started hiding all form of sexuality that could be "weird" from myself by that point. I remember sometime around that time I made some sort of post somewhere, I don't know where but I think its deleted, saying something along the lines of "is it possible to be really into hands but its not a fetish because I don't want to fuck them?" (paraphrasing). I "shut off" and ignored any thoughts I had around that for many years, until I watched JoJo and got INTENSE 'new' emotions seeing scenes of Kira being intimate with the disembodied hand, and kick-started a whole identity crisis. I think its also important to note, this wasn't long after I actually had sex for the first time and didn't understand why I wasn't into it and tried out labelling as asexual, hense the "crisis" began.

Now I say multiple times sex doesn't really ever come to my mind when "aroused" (if thats even what it is), but you may also know I have posted things in the past in a very sexual nature and drawn sexual art. I'm entirely sex positive so when I say this do NOT think I am against it; but that's just something I don't think I want to really do anymore and kinda didn't want to do in the first place. The main reason I did, is to me it was one level of 'weird' to be into something abnormal sexually, but a whole other level of 'weird' to be into something for whatever weird aggressive frustrating but thrilling reasons I have. So, trying to let myself be myself but still be "normal about it" I just chose what I'm ""supposed"" to do with a fetish, be sexual about it. I've done things like that also with many fictional characters where I really am into them in that weird aggressive "horny" way but just say something sexual because it makes the point I'm into them without being "weird". I am still learning to just be myself, and am working on just being myself with this. Another reason, and moreso applies to the art I did, was that I was trying to figure out if I could really like it as a sexual thing, I tried, and none of the actually sexual parts really got me interested, good note is I did find out what specific things I'm disgusted by.

[daisiesonafield-blog]

Hi Daisie, sorry if this is hard to understand as English isn't my first language. This is just theorizing and I'm not saying it will happen. If Harry ever decided he wanted to stop having beards and doing the stunts and to just live his life as a gay man but without making an announcement about it, like a glass closet basically... and I know some say he is in one but I disagree because he still has beards. If he wanted that for himself... to be 'out' but without announcing it, whether that is being seen in public with Louis or with another man if they're not together anymore, possibly referring to a boyfriend in interviews or music, or even just being publicly single and keeping his private life private but wanting people to know he is part of the lgbtq+ community.... how would any of that be possible when fans, tabloids, gossip pages like deuxmoi are constantly making up lies about him? Sorry if that's confusing. A glass closet basically. But that seems impossible for him because if he is publicly single then the tabloids and deuxmoi constantly make up lies about him hooking up with every single woman, even if he's never seen with them. Is it possible for any change now?

Hi dear,

Regarding your question about whether it would be possible for Harry to live as a gay man without making a public announcement, it is technically possible. He is already sort of doing that. We've seen him express his queerness more and more over the years. And he's said he wants to keep his private life private and that he has shared his sexual orientation and relationship status with his close friends and family. He's also said he doesn't feel the need to share that publicly at this time. And that's what he's comfortable and happy with right now.

As for the gossip and rumors, that just comes with being a celebrity. It will never stop because it is a caveat of being in the public eye. But also, the rumors ultimately don't matter. They may be annoying, but Harry himself has said he's chosen to ignore those types of things so that they don't impact him or his mental health negatively.

All he can control is himself, not the stuff that happens around him, and from what he's said over the years I think he's made peace with that aspect of fame. So if he gets papped laughing with someone and the gossip circle spreads the rumor that the person is his newest girlfriend, then so be it. He knows who the person is, and the tabloids ultimately don't matter to his every day life and his true self.

But in regards to him mentioning a boyfriend or being seen with a boyfriend in a manner that makes it clear they're dating - that in and of itself would be him coming out, even without a statement, and the media would go absolutely nuts regardless of him speaking on it or not. Again, that's the nature of being a celebrity, and specifically Harry Styles. The biggest aspects of his image are his dating life and sexuality speculations, so there is no way to keep something as monumental as that quiet. It would turn into a huge media news cycle, everywhere. With the general public and in all levels of fandom.

So really, there's a fine line between his queer expression right now and a more outwardly expression of it like you described. Right now his actions can still be straight-washed. Hets can still ignore the gay pride, gay sex innuendo and queerness. But even then, it's becoming harder to. Now there's 2 sides to it: one in which his gay pride gets erased, and one in which he's condemned for the gay agenda he's spreading with his rainbows. It's an amazing exercise in willful ignorance.

Of course, him being a queer man has been slowly more accepted tho. Even 2-3 years ago we would get laughed at for thinking he's queer. Or before that, called homophobic names for suggesting THE Harry Styles would *ever* touch a pride flag. So things have changed. The conversation regarding Harry has become more open to his queer expression, even in the gp. So that is progress. Even if the tabloids continue to run with made up hookup stories.

In terms of beards, I don't think he'll be able to entirely stop that unless he's getting ready to make a public statement about his personal life. But, in my opinion, it doesn't sound like it's something he wants right now. It's obvious he enjoys his privacy, and wants parts of his life to remain private. And that includes his sexuality and his partner. This is what's safest and best for him at the moment. For *many* reasons.

We can't forget the current world we are living in. While it may seem accepting of the queer community compared to 5, 10, 20 years ago, we are seeing our rights stripped away every day. No joke, every day. Rights that we fought years to have. Just taken. In 2023. Homophobia and transphobia are being normalized again. Homophobic and transphobic legislations being accepted in all levels of government. In the US, gay marriage is at risk, just 8 years after it was legalized in all states. And while the entertainment industry may look like they celebrate the LGBTQ+ community, it is still a cruelly homophobic institution that will crush a queer person, even if they are at the top right now.

This post is highly relevant.

Ok, this turned out to be super rambly. Hopefully I addressed what you were thinking about.

[noa-ciharu]

Random question:

I hope this won't offend you, but you may not answer this if this is personal.

"Since you stated in your bio that you are Aroace... who seems to have not any romantic feelings around people, would you say that Chobits or/and The one I love make a fine 'love story' for you?"

If something makes a good love story or not is a tough question. I usually deconstruct it to this:

Good love story shouldn't rely on readers shipping the characters.

Don't get me wrong, if readers hate the paring than they'd have harder time forming objective stance as well. But if someone who is neutral towards main ship(s) views the story and sees quality in it, then story has way more to offer than just rainbows and sparks. Therefore romance as genre on its own can easily fall down slippery slope of amatonormativity, stance that monogamous romantic (and sexual) relationship is everyone's primary goal in life, is on top of relationships hierarchy and that life is inherently without a value without its presence. If not viewing media under shippers lenses, those are very easily spotted. Hence romance combined with another genre such as comedy, psychological factors, horror, tragedy, drama etc.- those work way way better because there's more to the story than simply "when will those two kiss???"

Now, that's where "The one I love" fails sort of, because absolutely every chapter is entirely about romance, no depth whatsoever. But I feel it's wrong of me to bash on it since manga was sort of like Clamp's rough drafts/diary, more like self indulgent fanfic than proper manga. Lighthearted series that you read once, think it's cute and never think about it again. I wouldn't count manga as bad, more average.

Chobits however, it is more than you've bargained for definitely. Biggest plus in my book Chobits had is exceptionally well done mix of lighthearted, innocent and romantic moments on one hand with psychological elements and far far more complex issues than it meets the eye. At its core, Chobits is story about loneliness of modern world. With persocoms introduced to the world, those handy cute looking robots began replacing human connections; because having someone by your side who fulfils your every desire is far more convenient. Still, in process humans became not only detached from one another, but also from their persocoms as well; because they as well had feelings, even if they're piece of machinery humans viewed as replaceable.

Now there were alot of stories in Chobits about outcasts that grew too attached to their persocoms (like that dude that married one); ofc pain followed as average lifespan of machinery is far lower than human's. Then stories about humans being jealous of their loved ones caring more about persocoms than them. General fear that any inconvenience of human contact would be pushed aside and perfection of having someone who submits to your will would be sought as preferable option. And so much more, really story has alot to offer from psychological aspects.

And there's Chii - analogy for asexuality.

Echii elements are nicely done in this manga, because Chii herself isn't aware why walking around naked is inappropriate, why Hideki blushed when he sees her in just his shirt. She doesn't understand sexual attraction, nor she feels it. But she does feel romantic attraction, boy does she feel it strong. But she also felt fear when she realized she started loving Hideki. She worries if her affections would be returned, which to casual reader might be tad bit confusing since he's basically doting on her 24/7. Why is she unnecessarily worried you ask?

Keep in mind - Hideki is hypersexual guy. He's your average hetero teen guy who dreams about having a cute gf and later on wife. There's nothing wrong with that; but his dream does involve sexual activity - something Chii can't provide.

You see, that's the issue asexual people face every day - fear of rejection due to their lack of desire for sex being seen as inconvenience. It might sound a bit ridiculous to have one character in manga leave other because they can't have sex (especially if it's light romance manga where characters are expected to love one another with all the ""flaws"'), but irl that's unfortunately very very common occurence. People leave one another for far lesser reasons than that. To non-asexual people sex is important part of relationship and whether they want to admit it or not, being with asexual partner is seen as inconvenience.

Hence when Chii is fantasizing finding someone just for her, someone special who'll accept her for what she can do (provide romantic love) and what she can't do (provide sexual gratification) - it's basically analogy for asexual non-aromantic persons fantasizing about someone accepting them for what they are

[whatifyoulivelikethat]

Hi, I have a curiosity regarding the Wrong fic, or more so what is depicted in it.

From what I have read so far, usually, the aftercare is given to the submissive person. This was the first time since I've been reading this genre where while it seemed like a mutual act, the dominating person seemed to need reassurance.

Were her thoughts about herself a negative side effect of the role she embodies or did you imagine that to come from a different place?

Also, this is just my curiosity as my sexual experience hasn't been that varied, but is this something that can commonly happen? I only ask because I never considered this aspect of the dynamic, only the opposite where the person at the receiving end may need positive reinforcement.

I found this very interesting to consider and I guess it makes sense, I'm not sure why I never considered how either role can take a toll on you.

I love your writing, I find it mature and contemplative? The general feeling I've had reading some of your work so far is of a still night when I am in my feels yet not spiraling, just calm and having all sorts of epiphanies.

'wrong' is based off my own experience, the dom being me. Yes, it's me. Hi. I'm the problem, it's me. XD But because it's about me, I can only speak about myself as a dom, so take the following as you will.

Aftercare is something very personal. It depends on the dynamic of the couple and the depth / intensity of the scene (scene being the term for the session involving D/s). I think it's important to remember that all those involved in the scene have to go into a different headspace to perform these acts - just as a sub doesn't usually act that way in everyday life, a dom doesn't either. Therefore, most go in and then have to leave that headspace. The aftermath and aftercare is different for every person (even for every session); some want to be left alone / ignored to process, some want to be doted on.

Were her thoughts about herself a negative side effect of the role she embodies or did you imagine that to come from a different place?

The tendency towards finding pleasure in a power dynamic will always come from a personal place.

Those who read my work know that I often use unreliable narrator to show the reader what is really going on. You would think that having those thoughts would mean said person would have a tendency to submissiveness. Why would someone want to put themselves into a situation where they are fully confronting themselves, during sex no less, something that could be an escape, a safe haven? It could work for some people, maybe even help them, but it did not for me.

I didn't imagine, because I know. I know shoulder on a lot of responsibility when I'm the one in charge. No one knows when I'm going through some shit because I don't act differently in comparison to my usual self. I can always perform when asked, and usually I can be resilient and bounce back easily. The difference is if I drop or not. If my emotions are already unstable and I've hit that high, the emotional crash is possible. Overcompensating doesn't make the truth go away. if I can't and I go down, I tend to push everyone away.

So, what happens when the unstoppable force meets the immovable object?

I believe this kind of mental rollercoaster happens to other doms as well (but they don't like admitting shit, heh). No one lives the same life, so all the reasons are different. I've been on both sides of the D/s coin (and clearly I decided that I'm better at one than the other LMAO). This is my own personal opinion and experience: subs lack insight in how their doms suffer unnecessarily because subs don't think to ask if the dom is okay, if they need anything. I'm also sure that doms think they're fine, and maybe most of the time they are, but sometimes they're not. But admitting that would leave them vulnerable, would make them look weak, and they're suppose to be the tough ones in charge, right?

Uh huh.

This is a PSA to myself to, *clears throat*, fuckin' get over myself.

You can't change.

I used to lament a lot over this, over things that I thought I couldn't change, things that I thought I had to change, that must be changed... that I should change...? But that word, should, requires context. What is right depends on situation, depends on who is asking, depends on the consequences of living like that.

Dominance only refers to what you're doing. We're all a slave to our thoughts. Our thoughts have all the ammo to pierce through our defenses. You can't expect someone else to take the bullets for you either. You have to fight them one by one. Both accuracy and power matters. This kind of tactic is only effective if you have the right words in the right place. Sometimes all you need is someone to hand you the bullets.

Good thing Jeon Jungkook is bulletproof.

Heh.

;)

[arcxnumvitae]

💸have they ever or would they ever accept money or gifts in exchange for sex?

🛏️what’s their favorite position?

🕒what’s the longest time they went without engaging in sexual activity with a partner? [masturbation doesn’t count]

(Ven)

@lunarxdaydream || Sinday Headcanons

💸have they ever or would they ever accept money or gifts in exchange for sex?

Not really. Just because everything else in Ven's life and career is already a business exchange of sorts, he would rather keep that aspect of things out of his "fun" time. Let business dealings remain with business and let pleasure dealings be solely in pleasure, you know?

🛏️what’s their favorite position?

No preference! Ven genuinely truly doesn't have a preference for one position or other. Which is how he is a lot with sex, he's fine basically with whatever his partner favors, provided it's nothing that hits and hard no's for him. Do whatever! He's down for it.

🕒what’s the longest time they went without engaging in sexual activity with a partner? [masturbation doesn’t count]

Maybe like a month? To two months? Despite his flirtatious attitude and making it seem otherwise, while he finds sex fun and enjoys doing it, Ven actually isn't the type of person who's like they just have to get laid or they might just die. If it doesn't happen, it doesn't happen. And if a while goes by without him realizing he hasn't gotten laid, then whoops wow look at how the time's flown by.

[transgenderer]

radfem anon is projecting like nobody's business. [their] personal archetype sets off trauma-forged threat detection alarm bells hard in [me]. they praise radfem communities for their focus on education about emotional abuse, and neglect the point that these are actually cult tactics used on demand to reframe any interaction as abusive (or at least abuse-like) in the narrative-convenient direction, ironically making the people who are in deepest insanely emotionally abusive.

i have suspicions about who specifically the anon is, and if those suspicions are correct, then please, anon, get the fuck out of your positions of power in communities that are highly demographically trans. there's a reason you're on anon and it's that your presence and authority wouldn't be tolerated if it was shared common knowledge how "terf-adjacent" you are. maybe i'm being paranoid and the anon is someone else; i am known to get paranoid frequently. but then again the person i'm thinking of is known to make people paranoid frequently

not to mention, being aroused by some aspect of feminine presentation or embodiment or whatever doesn't mean you're a predator (or that your gender transition leaves you horny 24/7). that anon is arguing that if trans women have an "odd" fetish they are interested in sexually harassing or coercing others. that seems unfair

like, if you think certain trans women are transitioning due to "AGP" or whatever i guess i can understand wondering if they're doing x y and z for secret horny reasons. but that seems like catastrophizing in terms of going from "someone has ever been aroused by being feminine' to "someone's transition is basically to achieve a state of constant horniness and trick me"

yeah, tbh i think a lot of "knowledge" about the nature of abuse in radfem spaces are basically nonsense, but nonsense that can be very helpful for people who had trouble accepting their abuser was, yknow, doing bad things, and then creates a feeling of righterous anger, which made it spread. "why does he do that" is extremely memetically powerful, but its model of human behavior rings totally false to me, and afaik its basically all based on interviews, which you might note are not the BEST data source around for obvious reasons.

yeah, the fixation on AGP is weird. i mean, i sort of get it? like, i think our norms around the borders of where sexuality is accpetable are very messy and deal poorly with paraphilia. it feels...ungreat, to get off on something other people dotn know youre getting off on, in public. but its not your fault exactly. and i think the boundary between sexual joy and other joy is...fuzzy to the point of nonexistence. like there definitely are AGP-inspired trans women out there and like...idk, i think its fine? i think theyre fine. youre allowed to structure your life around getting off if you want.

anyway if youre in a position of power anon then your thing is definitely a problem, tho idk who you are

[zaneclodon]

it's pride month! since it's timely, i'm gonna write about my own gender and sexuality, i've figured out a lot about myself recently!

i consider myself nonbinary, just the general term since i haven't really seen anything more specific that feels right. though i do feel really good about presenting myself as my fursona online... maybe my gender is furry lol

i'm not really bothered that much by being referred to using male terms, but they don't really feel accurate. i don't correct ppl irl bc it's just not worth it for me but online i think i prefer they/them over he/him, both are fine but neutral feels better for me!

as for sexuality, it's complicated for me. i don't feel romantic or sexual attraction for real people or want to start a relationship, so i consider myself aroace. but there's just something about furry men that's attractive to me... haven't entirely sorted out what kind of attraction but it makes sense to me to say my fursona's gay since i would consider getting art of them in a relationship before i'd consider actually getting in a relationship myself, that level of fictional separation makes it seem more like something i could like

my attraction to furry men also has some weird aspects to it. i'm interested in sfw pieces and some suggestive pieces, but then when it gets outright nsfw i usually lose interest... the exception being in certain physically impossible circumstances i don't feel like describing on the public web. (if you follow my private twitter, you know.) don't know why i'm like this but i don't feel it's harming me, so may as well live with it and accept it!

since i don't really have a desire to present myself that much different from my assigned gender and i don't plan on entering a relationship, it doesn't seem like i'm at as much risk as others for facing the effects of oppression. that's not to say i don't face discrimination though: expectations tied to masculinity can make me uncomfortable, sometimes i feel isolated because of my lack of desire for a relationship, and being perpetually single has some legal downsides.

overall, i just want to live my life the way i want and let others live life the way they want. i wouldn't want to put down others for my benefit, i want eliminations of my personal hardships to come from changes that benefit everyone! i don't really have a purpose for writing all this, but if it helps someone recognize a different sort of experience and expand their worldview, that's more than i could ask for

[tequiladimples]

I hope this doesn't come off as rude, but I saw that you dislike when collision is branded het cause you're not het, but no one's talking about you personally? like for me, I really like collision but I can understand the criticism in a way and that isn't an attack on you (or an attack at all lol). again hope I'm not rude but idk it seems unnecessary to get upset, it's better to take it as constructive criticism

sigh i don't think ur rude but it simply isn't constructive.

look i’ll talk abt this one more time n then i Beg we can put it to rest! (this is gna be a lot of word vomit but if i'm elaborative now i hope i won't have to talk abt this ever again)

i’m deeply insecure abt many aspects of collision. i don’t really keep that a secret. i also know some ppl don't like fantasy, some ppl don't like the kinds of dynamics i like, some ppl don't vibe with my style of writing (hell, i barely vibe with my style of writing). those things are fine. i can't control that and i don't take that personally. the reason why this is the one critique i do take personally is because it genuinely presumes wrongful, harmful things about me and my values, especially when i've made deliberate efforts to avoid writing the exact flavor of fic they're accusing me of having written. just because people don’t mean for what they say to reflect back on me, doesn’t stop it from doing so.

the thing about calling something a “het fic” is that the term brings along certain connotations which i don’t stand by at all and feel deeply uncomfortable and distraught to possibly have created. i’ve gone over this godforsaken story again and again just to be absolutely sure i didn’t actually do so. when people say “het fic” they generally don’t mean “boy meets girl and they fall in love”, they mean “super rude and mean boy meets uptight virtuous girl and makes her fall in dependence with him through manipulation and treating her like shit until she behaves how he wants.” and that is straight up not the fic i wrote. i’m not stupid. i know the dynamic i went with is widely and easily misused and there’s a lot of fiction depicting really bad, uneven, unhealthy relationships through it. i knew this going in, and i’ve tried persistently to avoid making those same mistakes. 

skipping over the fact that they’re both boys (bc duh)--harry doesn't exhibit any real manipulative power over louis. collision harry is a grumpy, fruity little nerd who happened upon a really unfortunate lot in life and managed to trick himself into believing he's evil for like half a second of the story and his resolves crumble like a danish pastry the moment he receives his first hug. he's kind of aloof and arrogant, and understandably hardened from his past, but he's not bad. he's just lost. that's the basis of his character arc. now on the other hand, louis has harry wrapped around his finger starting like chapter 4. harry’s the one who opens up emotionally first, harry’s the one desperately seeking louis’ approval and caring about his opinion, harry’s the one who makes himself vulnerable continuously throughout the entire story. the only time louis makes himself vulnerable on a comparable scale is during the smut scenes, and even then, harry is gentle and attentive and puts louis first. louis is less experienced than harry in that area, but he isn't scared or intimidated by harry, and he has full reigns of the progression and nature of their relationship as a whole. that’s kind of how it needs to go with tough x soft dynamics for the power balance to not feel uneven, and i wrote the story accordingly. if you then happen to still be so blindly determined to associate soft/small with weakness (and thereby uh, womanhood ig) that you still felt like louis had an inferior position to harry solely because he is indeed soft/small, that sounds quite frankly like a you problem.

now, the whole point of louis’ character is that he’s underestimated. sure, he’s naive and self-centered and sheltered from the real world--that’s the basis of his character arc. those things all change. but louis isn’t ever weak. like idk who apparently needs to hear this but you can be small and simultaneously not be a pushover. the two aren’t mutually exclusive. there isn’t a single time louis takes shit in this story, especially not from harry; he gives back as good as he gets every time. oh! and then he literally saves the entire universe and the execution of that whole thing was his idea alone. i tried really hard to underline how strong-willed and full of grit he is to contrast what others think of him. if you think he’s portrayed as a meek and frail damsel, you missed the point. once again, i feel like we circle back to this misconception of louis being kind of naive and physically small = louis being inferior = louis being female. just do some soul searching.

(i could also get into the fact that for a bunch of people who don’t know these boys personally (no matter how much we like to think we do), this fandom is weirdly opinionated about characterization. especially regarding sexual stuff. i know creating a version for ourselves of who we think these boys are based on things we recognize in ourselves or things we find endearing is part of the comfort with loving them. but that doesn’t really equate to actually knowing them, and besides, this is fan fiction; no one’s opting to write a biography, anyway. being experimental and explorative and putting different aspects of their personalities in different lightings is what makes fic fun. if someone’s writing harmful or one-dimensional characters, that’s one thing, and preferences is again whatever floats your boat. but the “out of character” argument feels mostly really strange to me. this is a bit of a tangent, though.)

lastly, the thing is that i will and i do take it personally if someone insinuates that a character--a gay character--that i, a lesbian, construed is a secret vessel for expressing heterosexual attraction. if someone calls louis a “self-insert”, that does reflect back on me. and to elaborate on that--i don’t particularly love to bring it up, but it's quite disheartening to pour personal PTSD experiences into a character and rly put effort into doing it right and justice and underline growth and healing, just to find out people disregard all that completely in favor of declaring that my self-projection lies in the attraction to a man--which is to say, the one thing i couldn’t possibly feel more estranged from. it's so incredibly tactless. i feel thoroughly whiny at this point but how is that not supposed to make me a little sad?

anyway. none of this is to say that you can’t dislike or critique collision. you can. sometimes ppl don’t like things. but i hope i’m clear about where i’m coming from with my discomfort now. people’s preferences and dislikes are indeed not mine to be hurt by, but these things are. this definitely got unnecessarily long and i probably look like i take myself unbearably seriously (i promise i don’t), so i’m sorry. but at least i've said everything now, and if i encounter this sort of rhetoric in the future, i have something to redirect people to. also anon, none of this is directly pointed at you, i know you mean well. take care <3

[getsuruito]

1 + 4 + 5 for the vanilla sunday meme uwu

VANILLA SUNDAY HEADCANON MEME!

1. Is your muse a romantic? Do they dream of love and marriage?

Tanba likes the idea of romance, and love, they are things he's sought out in the past, thing's he's wanted, thing's he may still want in some capacity, but sadly he hasn't had much luck with 'romance', probably because of how 'love' itself just seems to elude him-- him specifically, not his partners, plenty partners have indeed loved him, but countless times has he gotten deeply involved with someone only to realize that whatever 'love' is, he didn't feel it for them, or didn't seem to.

In reality, Tanba's just put himself in a lot of bad situations and ended up with a lot of people who just weren't what his heart was looking for, but with all that's happened he's convinced himself that he's incapable of feeling romantic love and that he'll probably never find it, and that its best he doesn't look because every time he does, he ends up hurting someone selfishly. SO love and romance are definitely a, 'good in theory but not in practice' sort of thing for him at least until he finds the truly right person JHDFGSGAHJFGSHJ.

Marriage though? Oh god does Tanba completely abhor the idea of marriage. Of all Tanba's relationships that had terrible or depressing ends, the worst ones were his marriages, and in light of that he see's the whole notion of 'marriage' as useless-- if other people find solace in marriage that's fine, he's happy for them, really, but in regards to his own dealings, he see's marriage as metaphorical salt to the metaphorical gaping wound that's his already terrible luck with relationships lmao.

2. Does your muse initiate a lot of physical contact?

Tanba unfortunately does not! Tanba loves the idea of physical contact with people he fancies a whole lot, be it the kind of contact that leads to the bedroom or just nice fluffy things like holding hands or hugging or what have you, he's just really awkward when it comes to making the first moves in either regard, and so he almost never initiates unless he's been with someone long enough to grow comfortable with doing so, but only then-- otherwise most times that call is his partner's to make first.

5. Is your muse comfortable with public displays of affection?

THIS ONE WAS ALREADY ANSWERED SO I'LL JUST SUBSTITUTE IT WITH ANOTHER NUMBER?

23. Is your muse the type to discuss their sex life or sexual prowess with others?

Tanba boasts about a lot of things he does in life-- actually he just likes to show off and boast and talk about almost every aspect to himself there is, ego for days, but you won't catch Tanba talking about his sex life, not in any great detail, anyway! That's one of the few topics Tanba likes to keep as restrained as possible.

[homenum-revelio-hq]

Welcome (back) to the Order of the Phoenix, Sara!

You have been accepted for the role of non-biography character NILAM DEUIL REGULUS BLACK with the faceclaims of Go Ah-Sung & Ahn Jae-Hyun! We’re so excited to have you back into the roleplay with Regulus. We especially liked how you describe her readiness to explore her identity. We were very interested in the complications that having an underground informant pretending to be someone else via polyjuice can bring to the Order!

Please take a look at the new member checklist and send in your account within 24 hours! Thank you for joining the fight against Voldemort!

OUT OF CHARACTER:

NAME: Sara

AGE: i am so old, Karli

TIMEZONE: EST

ACTIVITY LEVEL: generally around every day for at least one post

ANYTHING ELSE: n/a 

CHARACTER DETAILS:

NAME: Regulus Black going by Nilam a shortening of Alnilam which is a star on Orion’s Belt and means “belt of pearls”. She tries not to use any last name but uses Deuil, the French word for mourning because it makes her think of black clothing and amuses her.

AGE: 19

GENDER, PRONOUNS, and SEXUALITY:

Regulus Black would not know how to have sex if someone took her hand, stripped her of clothes, and gave her an extensive, hands on, tutorial. It's not that she hasn't thought about sex, or that she wouldn't enjoy it. It's more that that she went from angry and angsty Hogwarts kid straight to Voldemort's inner circle. Then she participated in some murdering, uncovered some very uncouth dark magic practices, and then purposefully poisoned herself in a cave.

She's been busy and, really, this is her very first time she's ever had the chance to be on her own and try to figure out what she likes. In addition to that, there's been this pervasive understanding that Regulus Black was a boy. Along with stealing back some time (sort of), Regulus has really stolen back her own identity after her whole life time of pretending to be another gender. Unfortunately the identity she stole back didn't come with a tutorial or a new personality. At least, so far, her mother doesn't know but that might be because she faked her own death.

Oh, and if found out most of her family will want to kill her and the other part of the family, well, can she even trust them? 

Details, really. Stupid, unimportant, details. Totally doesn’t impact her self perception at all.

BLOOD STATUS: Pureblood

HOUSE ALUMNI: Slytherin

ANY CHANGES: N/A

CHARACTER BACKGROUND:

PERSONALITY:

Strengths--

Expansive Thinking:

It’s not so much cunning or perception or even intelligence that Regulus Black has. Her OWLs were okay—if not spectacular. Her ability to socialize… somewhat less so than other family members. But what she lacks in social and book learning she well makes up for in being able to piece together information. Sure, Regulus might have never been able to sit down and regurgitate a chapter of a book—but she could take that same information and connect it to other chapters in other books and understand how it works. The same concept is applied outside of learning and into social situations—a perception on who-is-interested-in-whom (which got her into trouble more than once at Hogwarts when he blurted it out in the common room) or just what someone else is getting up to. Regulus doesn’t require obvious information—just enough clues that, over time, fit together like a puzzle.

Cunning it's not just a descriptor for her house: Regulus might not be the most conniving social mover, but that doesn't mean she hasn't sniffed out ways to manipulate all on her own. Before faking her own death, she became quite good at blending into the background, looking softer and more malleable than she was (although, to be fair, she was always a little more malleable than Regulus would have wanted to admit), and collecting information without being thought of as, well, anything worth worrying about. Post-faking-her-death, well, she's got to survive somehow… sure she might have it  slightly easier (everyone's looking for a boy, after all, if they are looking for anyone…) but that doesn't mean she isn't striving, and mostly succeeding, to keep herself and what she knows safe. Regulus Black might feel like she’s been dealt a shit hand—but she’s been doing okay with it so far and that’s all down to being a cunning little asshole.

Weaknesses--

Anxious it's not mess that makes Regulus anxious: its life. Regulus as always been an unsettled, introverted, pureblood who  doesn't care for loud noises (shouting is the worst), mudbloods, werewolves or mess. Counting helps, rubbing the inside of her robes between her fingers helps. Not being around people helps. Really, all of this would be a dead giveaway to her figuring out Voldemort or Death Eater plans but… its constant. It's been a part of Regulus since, perhaps, the day she was born--or, if not then, then certainly by the time she landed at Hogwarts. In fact, she's even learned how to use it to her advantage to some degree--to throw someone off  or mislead them...but that doesn't really help when an argument breaks out and all she wants to do is cover her ears and shout stop stop stop.

Unstable so all the cunning and crafty thinking couldn't save Regulus from one stupid decision: drinking poison. If you asked her, even, she was perfectly fine before she went into a cave and drank a mysterious dark potion… but would anyone stable really think that was the best course of action? Into a cave. Alone. (Does a a house elf even count?) Knowing it was set up by one of the darkest wizards of her time who was fracturing his soul for immortality. No, Regulus Black reached the point of 'unstable' long before that poison touched her lips. It's even possible that the poison she drank has nothing to do with her difficulties now. Sometimes her hands  go numb and she drops things, other times she misses a little time...well, she thinks, she didn’t need that hour anyway! Thoughts get a bit out of order--though they seem perfectly acceptable right then. This should concern Regulus more than it does but she's survived this long, hasn't she?

BRIEF OVERVIEW OF FAMILY:

Walburga : Regulus likes to say that Sirius is more like their mother but, honestly, she's not so sure about that now (though she will be if she ever argues with Sirius again). Loud, dramatic, and demanding Regulus tried her best to stay in Walburga's good graces more often than not. 

Sirius : older brother, arsehole, Regulus simultaneously adores and loathes her older brother. The adoration came from when they were little, thick as thieves, and nothing could break them apart… until Hogwarts did, until Sirius left for good, until the war. There's a lot that Regulus has never told Sirius and likely a lot Sirius has never told Regulus--and Regulus isn't sure that's a bad thing.

Narcissa : honestly, if Regulus could have family related #goals Narcissa would probably be a good paradigm to aspire to… unfortunately, her poise and social management are so far out of her skillset the idea of attaining those skills is pretty laughable. 

Bellatrix : another family member Regulus delights in ascribing similar personality traits to Sirius. Bellatrix was instrumental in getting Regulus involved with the Death Eater's which was thrilling at sixteen and horrific by  eighteen.

Andromeda : Who? Even after having run away herself, Regulus doesn't  know what to  think about   Andromeda. Andromeda ran away for the wrong reasons, right?

It would be foolish to imply that Regulus Black is nothing like her family: Regulus Black is everything like her family. Slightly neurotic, settled in her own perception of right-and-wrong and superiority… all of this could be describing her mother, some of her extended family, and even her brother (well, neurotic in a different way, surely). The major difference between Regulus Black and Sirius Black is simple: Sirius was gifted a direct personality and Regulus a sponge. One might even call her sensitive—at least if they had met her at five and not fifteen. Instead of struggling against the tide of emotions and shouting in her home, Regulus absorbed it all. Instead of fighting, Regulus aquesessed: they knew better, after all. If she just did everything right maybe things would turn out okay?

Love might not ever be something said but perhaps there was that in the family, too. The language was just different and Sirius had a mistranslation. Regulus was better than that.

OCCUPATION: 

Regulus : family heir, do you think  she was allowed any "hobby" (much less job) other than Death Eater? After leaving the family "nest", so to speak, Regulus looked for ...well, it wasn't so much something to do as something to cover her weird erratic behavior. That something ended up being divination. She has an ad that runs in the paper once a week on different editions that reads: Nilam Deuil. Smoke and Ink scrying by Owl or Toad Appointment Only.

ROLE WITHIN THE ORDER/THOUGHTS ABOUT THE ORDER: 

Regulus is fairly certain they are all going to die--herself most certainly included in that. Granted,  she was expecting to die about two months earlier and that hasn't happened yet. Generally, Regulus has gone from one vigilante group to another and while the people are different  she finds a strange sort of comfort in the cycle of chatter and arguments  she hears. It's … the same? different but the same. In addition to that there’s even some comfort in understanding that they are all going to die--after all, if that's the case, what does any of this matter anyway?

Purpose: Regulus is providing information for sanctuary. Part of that sanctuary agreement is that she can present as the gender she is and not to be outed to anyone. She wanted some measure of freedom (thus new face and faked death) and protection (thus aligning herself with the Order). Her information is along the lines of organization structure, horcruxes, and methodology, among other aspects.

Role: Externally Regulus presents as a new order receuit named Nilam Deuil. A few upper level order members (Dumbledore, Kingsley, Moody, possibly others in play) know Nilam is Regulus while most simply know her as low level assistance in London. Other inner circle members may know that there is some sort of informant that has come forward and is involved in closed door meetings, however they do not know it's Regulus. In this way the Order helps protect Regulus but also holds the leash keeping her tethered to the conflict.

SURVIVAL: 

Regulus should be dead. Regulus is suicidal as a general rule (not that she’d admit to it) and that is no better displayed than in her visit to a cave filled with inferi and poison. However…  she ...didn't die.  she didn't die. Instead,  she was able to get in contact with Dumbledor. In addition to that, prior to her decision to leave the Death Eaters (by death or otherwise) Regulus survived based on her dueling skill and wits--although some would question the latter. She’s only now trying to get into the swing of things of moving around a lot or getting comfortable with a bunch of mudbloods and halfbreeds: she’d rather move around a lot.

RELATIONSHIPS: 

Mary MacDonald she and Regulus only overlapped in a few classes thanks to her being a different house, but  she certainly knows about her -- heard all about her as Mulciber bragged endlessly of that one time  she "put that mudblood" in her place. Regulus got used to gritting her teeth in a smile and nodding along as though  she were oh-so-impressed...but the woman she met didn't seem to have been put in any place and now Mulciber is dead. Maybe there's more to this Mudblood than meets the eye. Maybe there's a reason  she should avoid her -- and not just because  she doesn't want to be tripped-up and found out through a accidental reference to something she should have no idea about.

Sirius Black is the one person who will, at some point, be told who she  is and where she's hiding. Regulus knows the only control she has over that is to spill the beans herself..but should she? Or should she wait and see when Dumbledor or one of the  other  upper Order Member's out her? If she waits she might die before she ever has to deal with whatever fallout that will bring. 

OOC EXPLORATION:

SHIPS/ANTI-SHIPS: Regulus / Chemistry. Really, Regulus is more asexual then anything.

WHAT PRIVILEGES AND BIASES DOES YOUR CHARACTER HAVE?  Regulus : was born into every ounce of privilege and is having a hard time managing the fact she now lives as though she has none of them. Purebloods are obviously better than everyone else --except now it's everyone else that is inadvertently keeping her alive. In addition to that, Regulus also had the privilege of being tutored in dueling and additional educational opportunities. She speaks French and passable German in addition to English and… plays the harpsichord. 

WHAT ARE YOU MOST LOOKING FORWARD TO? Fuck Terfs, frankly.

PLOT DROP IDEAS: You know me, I’m here to be the IC fuck up who blows up a building on pure accident unlike Dorcas… or providing information at the wrong time (or right one)

ANYTHING ELSE? N/A

EXTRA FOR NON-BIO CHARACTERS:

PAST: 

Regulus Black was never supposed to be the heir of the Black family. Sirius was louder, a natural at many things, and just almost the ideal Heir. Almost because he rebelled a bit too much and Regulus never quite understood why. It would have been so much easier if Sirius had just… relaxed. Family was important and for all that Sirius loved them, his friends were not family. While Sirius was learning the importance of close friends (and found family) Regulus was being immersed in the family mindset. She was never one to question too hard and certainly not socially skilled enough to find better contacts. It was almost natural, certainly half expected, that her counter rebellion to her brother was joining the Death Eaters. What wasn't expected was that  she eventually, slowly but decisively, realized that her 'go along and everything is fine' way of being was the worst choice she could have made. 

PRESENT: 

Regulus Black faked “his” own death. What else was she supposed to do, really? If she left she’d just be murdered and have never had the opportunity to live as herself. Granted, she expects this ‘opportunity’ to sell what she knows to the Order and live “freely” to evaporate shortly but something is better than nothing. It’s just too damn bad that drinking poison has given her some adverse effects and pretending to be someone she’s not takes social skills she’s never honed. At least when she looks in the mirror she feels like herself for the first time...or would if her polyjuice didn't round out her face so much. For Regulus, it’s all about the details and racing a self-made clock before she fucks up enough that everyone will realize: surprise! That weird new girl is a murderous Death Eater who had enough information to buy herself a new life.

Regulus' Alias is: Nilam Deuil a former Beauxbatons Academy student and current Smoke and Ink scrying divination "expert".

FC CHOICES: Go Ah-Sung (and Ahn Jae-Hyun) or Lana Condor (and Moon Gayoung)

[mediocremediaa]

Body Modification on Social Media

The world of social media can be seen as a glamorous and exciting addition to people's lives, sometimes becoming their whole life as some make a living out of showing their followers their day-to-day. As exciting and positive as social media may seem to an outsider, there are real and extreme effects on people's health and wellbeing. There are heavy ties between social media users and body modification whether it be plastic surgery or as simple as fillers. Those who are some of the most successful on social media are people who are attractive to most, women accentuating their assets (lips, waist, bum and sometimes boobs), Men choosing to accentuate things like their jawline and muscles. Most of the time user's constantly seeing modified bodies start to become less happy with their own, some eventually resorting to body modification.

Recent data shows the hashtag plastic surgery had 523,361 posts associated with it in 2018, leaving much room for a much larger number today. Following #plasticsurgery was #facelift with 224,235 posts, and #rhinoplasty with 138,259 posts (Robert G Dorfman, Elbert E Vaca, Eitezaz Mahmood, Neil A Fine and Clark F Schierle, 2018). With social media stars such as The Kardashians, Paris Hilton, Courteney Cox (Seen below with obvious plastic surgery) and many more all having some sort of work done plastic surgery is almost becoming a norm for a lot of people.

With the ability to monetize content posted on users' pages, visibility and aesthetic labour start to make a big difference in who gets noticed and ‘insta famous’ and who doesn't. The ability to generate content and make a living out of it all relies upon the amount of attention each post produces for the user's overall digital brand. As a result, there are many profiles that post photos with some sort of unnatural aspect to them. Whether it be the use of photoshop and apps like facetune or physical body modifications. The number of modified images cluttering the digital community can leave everyday uses with mental issues and body disorders like BDD. The overuse of plastic surgery and other body modification techniques when posting content has left little room for natural and body-positive spaces to exist. Even if they do exist, which they do, they're extremely difficult to find, overshadowed by creators like the Kardashians, who are so for small waists and big butts.

In the end with body modification becoming such a normal thing to do, especially online, there are countless negative ramifications on society and the digital space.

References: Robert G Dorfman, Elbert E Vaca, Eitezaz Mahmood, Neil A Fine and Clark F Schierle, ‘Plastic Surgery-Related Hashtag Utilization on Instagram: Implications for Education and Marketing’, Aesthetic Surgery Journal, Volume 38, Issue 3, March 2018, pp 332–338

Drenten et al, 2018 ‘Sexualized labour in digital culture: Instagram influencers, porn chic and the monetization of attention’ Gender, Work and Organization, pp 42

[revchainsaw]

Demolition Man (1993)

I am by no means an Action Movie guy. I have however time and time again found myself surprised by the genre when it has found its way into my viewing habits. The first Action Movie that really impressed me was Die Hard. I watched it one Christmas as I searched for more unusual holiday fare and was utterly blown away. I felt as if I should seek out more of these films. I got as far as Lethal Weapon 2 before I retreated back to the world of absurd horror and sci-fi. If not for the power of cultural osmosis and the question of the 3 shells i might not have worked up the interest to check out 1993's Demolitions Man. I was expecting a typical cop vs criminal action flick starring Stallone, but what I found was an absolutely delightful Science Fiction Comedy.

The Message

Released in 1993 Demolition man starts right out of the gate with a hilariously pessimistic prediction that by the year 1996 every city in America will be Gotham on crack. The Joker of this film is Simon Phoenix and though he lacks the circus act accoutrement he is absolutely a clown prince of crime. I would not be surprised to discover Heath Ledger took inspiration from Snipes for his turn as an agent of chaos. Phoenix is an unstoppable force and in Stallone he finds his immoveable object, John Spartan (God I love these action movie names), a cop who will walk through hell itself to see this mad man brought to justice. However in his blind pursuit of his greatest enemy Spartan is easily coaxed into making reckless decisions, resulting in unnecessary fatalities. Both Spartan and Phoenix are thus sentenced to cryogenic prison sentences.

In 2032, Phoenix is thawed out for a parole hearing and of course things go as you might expect. Phoenix finds that he has changed, someone has used scifi shenanigans on him while he was frozen giving him abilities both mental and physical that he had not had before, hinting at some kind of conspiracy, he also finds that this was overkill as even the unmodified Phoenix would not have had any trouble conquering the world of 2032. Society has become utopian and nobody has a concept of using physical force to resolve issues. This leads the police of the time to make the controversial decision to thaw out Spartan to bring down the villain.

Hilarity ensues as Sandra Bullocks character, Lenina Huxley (awesome name once again; named after the author of Brave New World), is tasked with keeping the primitive 90s action hero in line with the moral imperatives of the time. This includes avoiding violence, not using naughty words, a vegetarian diet, and socially distanced sexual intercourse (a gag at the time but in the real life 2020's may have been a welcome invention).

Without giving too much more away, this future peace comes at a great cost to personal freedom and expression and there is a society of free people living in the fringes of society known as Scraps lead by a civil rights leader of sorts named Friendly. There is a sinister conspiracy to wipe them out that is the central plot contrivance that brought our forces of Good and Evil to face off. The Super Phoenix betrays his handlers, seeks to turn this utopia into his personal playground and is eventually defeated by Spartan in the final showdown. Sylvester Stallone eagerly eats a rat burger and Sandra Bullock says a cuss word at one point.

The Benediction

Best Character: Phoenix Rises

Everyone loves a villain. I had mostly known Wesley Snipes from the Blade films and did not know he had this kind of range. I expected very stoic boring bad ass action dialogue from both Stallone and Snipes in this movie, and believed the sci-fi elements would simply be space cars and laser guns but was I wrong. I'm so happy to be wrong. This film just surprised me and Snipes performance as Phoenix was by far the most enjoyable. I loved his menace and the threat that he presented. I don't think there had been such a loveable bastard force of nature character like this portrayed in film so well until this time. He is such a believable threat that I really doubted there was going to be a way to bring him down. It was great to see the other characters underestimate him and to see him not only physically dominate his obstacles but to also out smart and out class his 'puppet masters' was just a pleasure the whole time.

Best Actor: Bullock in the Chamber

I know that Sandra Bullock stars in a ton of comedy films but I've never been able to say that I found her to be particularly funny. She also strangely plays a cop in a lot of these comedies. I may think of Lilina Huxley every time I think of Sandra Bullock from now on. She was absolutely hilarious, deadpan and dedicated to this character in a way that sold the world of 2032 America. I really don't think that the overly sensitive utopic world would have felt like a genuine place where human beings lived and not just a cartoonish backdrop without the honesty that Bullock brought to the role. It's hard to find actors who can inhabit a comedic world as seriously as a Middle Earth. And maybe that's not what she'd like to be remembered for, but I think she deserves that credit.

Best Aspect: a Genre/Genre/Genre Classic

Demolition Man is such a pleasant surprise. No one in this movie seems to begrudge it's wackiness and it lends itself to the humor in a way that lets the audience rest in the assurance that this was a pleasure for the cast and crew as much as it is a pleasure for us. It doesn't sacrifice it's action to be to screwball, and it doesn't sacrifice it's world building to be to absurd. It's a comedy that takes it's self seriously. I can not stress enough that this movie nails several genre's at once. It's a funny comedy, an ideologically committed satire, an exciting action flick, a hard science fiction tale that explores the high concept of the consequences of utopia, and a fantasy that sells it's goofy future world.

Worst Aspect: If Only Cops Were More Violent

I am not a fan of the implications of the film. In the 90s it seemed that PC culture was the big enemy of personal freedom and that giving a shit about other peoples feelings was going to turn our civilization into a bunch of overly sensitive weaklings. This narrative has imbedded itself in our culture and produced a generation of selfish assholes who feel completely justified in their every callous action. Demolition Man is a Libertarian science fiction film, but I find that it's central fiction is just that. I do not believe that committing to non-violent conflict resolutions, considering the feelings of others, and not eating meat will 'neuter' our abilities to live individually free and fulfilling lives. It's a caricature, that while funny, i think is inaccurate. If you are of the mindset that Personal Freedom is at odds with social justice then you may find yourself enjoying the idea that it takes a violent police reaction to save society from it's own worst impulses, but I find that idea fairly fantastical. I think seeing the community stand firm in their convictions and still overcome evil may have been a more ideologically realistic interpretation of how the day can be saved, but instead we are given a lone wolf renegade cop killing the bad guy will reform the world, and in todays world, that just seems like a profoundly stupid message.

Best Scene: Fight at the Museum

Demolition Man boasts several ass kicking confrontations between Spartan and Phoenix. The opening Escape from L.A. backdrop that establishes these deadly foes, and the fall out that an interaction between the two can have is considered extreme even when the world is seemingly at the brink of collapse. It really sets a high stake for our squeaky clean future. The final battle in the Cryo-lab is also iconic and features a pretty excellent practical effect. However, I'd have to give the best scene to the fight at the weapons exhibit. The fact that Spartan knows his enemy so well is on display as he predicts that the Weapons exhibit will be an irresistible draw, we get to see Phoenix at his chaotic best, great one liners, and it's just a toy box for both Hero and Villain to let lose and deliver on that fall out I was just mentioning had been set up in the first act. While I loved the comedic take on this rivalry, I'd like to see Snipes and Stallone take up their beef again in a more seriously violent film. They make for great arch-rivals.

Best Gag: Potty Mouth

When I was a kid I remember my father hauling ass down our residential road and getting pulled over just a block away from our driveway. I think he was doing 55 in a 35. It was his fault but as the proud small government southern man he was, he felt it was absolutely overreach on behalf of the police department to give him a ticket on the road that he lived on. Stupid, I know. But our car was full of groceries and the officer let our ice cream melt while the whole time we sat in the truck with our home in view. My father was so enraged about this ticket that he got revenge on the mean old government by writing the check to pay his ticket, and then using said check to wipe sweat from his ass crack after mowing the lawn the next day. He mailed it in and I as an 11 year old knew that it was not going to effect the offending officer in the least, but that some poor old county clerk was going to probably get pink eye. Anyway, if you handle money or checks, you should always wear gloves, or wash your hands regularly before touching your face or eating. All that to say, I really enjoyed that after being frustrated with the 3 shell system Stallone racks up a series of fines for profanity. These fines are issued via an automated ticket dispenser on the wall in the police department. Stallone lets out a string of hilarious expletives that I hope to God were adlibbed, before he is satisfied with a nice pile of paper in his hand. He implies that he is going to the bathroom to do a little paperwork, and the scene is over. Even if you don't want to watch the whole movie, go ahead and YouTube this scene. Stallone has a surprising talent for comedy on display here.

Summary

To Begin with, I would say not to take this film too seriously: It is a comedy, after all, and I am not certain that the political implications of the movie were meant to be thought out as much as I have above. Unlike Judge Dredd, which Stallone would star in 2 years after this, (tragically deciding to bring Rob Schneider along with him) Demolition Man does not openly advocate for fascism. It's funny, it's a tight story with a satisfying conclusion, it's got great action choreography and it may be Snipes, Bullock and Stallone at their absolute best.

Overall Grade: B

[starship-imzadi]

S2 E1 The Child

Ooo, check out Worf's new baldric (and shirt and forehead) and RIKER'S BEARD!!! And Geordi got a promotion.

Riker maneuver.

I got so used to Frakes clean shaven it's odd to see the beard. Don't get me wrong, I like the beard, a lot. It's a very important part of TNG finding it's style. A lot of people credit his beard as signifying the solidification of TNG creatively. I think it's a very important step but I would disagree and argue that the series doesn't really settle in until season 3.

It's like Tinker Bell...crossed with immaculate conception? Or rape...

Riker's beard is a little fuller than it usually is. It has some "nautical" fine-tuning yet to go.

Ah yes, Pulaski. I really don't like her. She's one of the reasons I don't think the series settles until season 3.

This addition of 10 forward (Guinan) and it's retroactive continuity is odd. But I suppose unlike Riker's beard a new room can't just be added to a ship.

It is odd how Deanna responds in this scene. Before the meeting has even begun she sits at the conference table separate from everyone else and is barely responsive. These are her friends and she can't even look at them. Then when Picard announces her pregnancy he initially skips over the entire reason that it's ships business and not just a personal concern.

I've seen some comparison of this discussion as an issues of pro-choice and I would be inclined to agree but I have a few other issues too. One problem I have is this is set up so Troi does not initially advocate for herself. Pulaski and Picard are the ones who present the pregnancy and Troi has physically positioned herself to be removed from the conversation. It's not even made clear what she's feeling. Her response could be anger or it could be determination. Obviously the initial concern is for everyone's safety and once Troi actually speaks up they immediately respect her decision. But from there the show don't address the very problematic issue that Troi wasn't given an option for consent for the initiation of this pregnancy. She hasn't (exactly) been sexually assulted but she has still been violated. This is the second Troi focused episode (after Haven), and the way she as a character is being used is not okay.

I can see Riker's response being interpreted two different ways. He asks who the father is and it's either in the same vein of jealousy and difficulty in letting Troi go as "Haven" or he and Troi are good friends and he's hurt that she didn't share such an important part of her life. (It's not clear at this stage how close they are as friends. In season 6 "Man of the People" Riker says he's closer to Deanna than he's ever been to anyone, but that's a ways away). Neither is a very compassionate response, they're both self-centered, and they're both ignorant of her clear emotional distress.

I love when Wesley turns to look at Troi, and Riker just stares at him before pointedly ordering him to standard orbit.

Data's fascination and wonder at birth are very endearing. He starts to smile when Deanna approves of his presence during delivery. Data's questions do bring up some interesting thoughts on telepathy and babies...

I've seen a fair amount of commentary that I'd like to echo here about some fairly progressive aspects of this episode. Specifically have a man present in the delivery room. Even by the late 80's this was a very progressive and new option for men. A few decades before and this would have been unheard of. Not only that but there is no father, Data is present and a friend. Perhaps the fact that Data is present, and not a man in a true sense, makes this more acceptable. Either way, this this is definitely an episode that does better when viewed in its time, and without more resent "sensibilities" imposed on it for judgment.

(with that said It's the 24th century and the best they can manage is stirrups.... I'm just not okay with that.)

Okay, so Riker. The first scene around the conference table he's selfish, the scene in the bridge he's protective, and then this scene he's very affectionate, supportive, and caring. He seems to genuinely care for her but hangs back so as to not intrude. What is odd is that Deanna doesn't know he's there. Given her empathic abilities (and connection with Riker) surely she would feel how close he was, and what he felt, if only vaguely. Granted there are other things to preoccupy her focus but we still don't, and never really, understand what their connection, their imzadi bond, affords them.

I've seen the interpretation that Deanna didn't want Will there based on the fact that she asked Data to be there. However, she responded positively to seeing Will and Data's presence at this birth seems to be just based around circumstance: he was there, he was available. For Riker's part he may not feel entitled to be there, and Deanna may not feel like she can ask that of him. Ultimately, there's a lot of room for different interpretation because their relationship is so undefined. We know nothing other than that they are ex lovers who still have [unknown] emotions for each other.

I just noticed Pulaski wears a different uniform from Crusher. Pulaski's is a sort of short dress but it's not like the tight short-sleeved little skirt things you can see women (and a few men early on) wear in the background. And she has trousers/leggings.

Pulaski is a prejudiced b****. It's clearly intentional. I don't know why she was a necessary addition to this crew. (I went on a small rant about her being racist for my Encounter at Farpoint post) Where was all of the "holier than thou" enlightened BS when her character was designed?

So, there's a litter of puppies in the nursery, but just for today. Where did they come from? Picard may not have played with puppies but it's worth seeing Patrick Stewart with one (and maybe he got Number One as a puppy)

Okay, back on track now:

The exterior close up shot of the outside of the ship panning into 10 forward is very unusual; there aren't typically close up shots of the outside of the ship. There have been a few but they're rare.

It looks like Wil grew a bit between seasons.

Majel isn't the computer. Why? (At some point I think she is all of the computer, right?)

Amazing performance from Marina.

I love this gif set, I think it really sums up the episode:

I want to see Worf tuck Wesley in. And look at the smile from Riker. I think Riker has finally, and almost entirely, loosened up. Space dads!

Engage.