#several months ago i would have been complaining about how i couldn't come up with a single viable idea

[junesinterlude]

having a surplus of ideas lately

[rcmclachlan]

Heard this was the place to come if we wanted to know about pregnant Buck talking to the baby about the station tasks 🤔

@dadvans is a dirty enabler. He's also the one who came up with the idea of Buck calling the kid "probie" fyi

+

When Tommy walks into the 118, it doesn't feel quite like a homecoming, but when Bobby catches sight of him and smiles as though Tommy's presence isn't just welcome, but expected, something inside him relaxes as though it were twenty years ago and he's about to walk up the stairs to sit down for another incredible family dinner. 

"You guys get called to the thing with the Aon?" Grinning, he shakes Bobby's proffered hand as a matter of course, and part of him can't help but glow under Bobby's approving gaze.

It feels a bit like he's cheating on Captain Salazar, who took Tommy under her wing the second he got to Harbor and has given him free rein to do whatever he damn well pleases when he's in the air, but she doesn't cultivate the familial aura that cleaves to Bobby like a shadow. He likes and respects the hell out of her, but he probably wouldn't steal a helicopter and fly into a hurricane for her.

Some people were meant to be parents; Bobby Nash is definitely one of them. Tommy's working on it. 

Bobby gives a sporting but ineffective swipe at the soot smeared across his forehead with his wrist. "Normally falling space junk knocking over a skyscraper would take the cake, but since twenty million bees weren't released into the city, I'm calling it a ho-hum sort of day."

There's something severely wrong with them that the third-tallest building in LA breaking in half like a Kit Kat Bar doesn't rank above bees, but Tommy had to fly through that shit storm, so he can't disagree. The next person who says 'bee-nado' is getting thrown off the Santa Monica pier.

Speaking of. Tommy throws a quick glance at the three engines parked in their usual spots in the hopes of catching a glimpse of movement, and he's either losing his touch or never had it to begin with, because he's clocked immediately.

Bobby gives him a knowing look.

Caught, Tommy chuckles. "At the risk of sounding patronizing, how much did he overdo it?"

"Buck didn't mind being on winch and hose duty," Bobby says wryly. At Tommy's dubious look, he adds, "Okay, he did try to sneak into the thick of it once or twice, but he complained only a little when I threatened to hogtie him and chuck him in the back of the ambulance."

"Only a little? That's unlike him." Tommy can perfectly picture the mulish pout on Evan's ridiculous lips because someone forbade him from running into a building that was hanging at a 240° angle. 

"Hen may have also hinted that she'd break out The Powerpoint again if he didn't stop whining," Bobby admits. The capital letters are audible.

Tommy gives a low whistle. "That was diabolical of her."

He unfortunately hadn't been there when Hen presented You're Living For Two: A Comprehensive List of Things Buck Will Avoid for the Next 8 Months or Hen Will Have Him Committed (With A Foreword Written By Maddie Han) to Evan and the rest of the 118, but Eddie had texted Tommy throughout the whole thing like he was live tweeting a football game. At slide 40, which had five charts demonstrating the rates at which acute physical stress increased the risks of miscarriage and low birth weight, Eddie sent him a picture of Evan's cowed expression. Slide 43 ("Deli Meat A No-No"), on the other hand, got him a video of Evan in a heated argument with Hen, Howie, and Bobby about the merits of that. 

It ended when Bobby shouted, "It's not just you that you're risking, Buck! Every time you deliberately put yourself into harm's way, you're also risking my grandchild!" and Evan burst into tears and sobbed, "You can't say things like that when you're taking hot dogs away from me!" 

When Evan came home that day, he announced that mentioning The PowerPoint—and anything to do with Microsoft in general—was verboten for the next thousand years. Tommy couldn't help but quip, "It looks like you're upset about your family wanting you to carry this pregnancy safely to term. Would you like help? Yes, no, or cancel?" 

He was forced to sleep on the couch for three nights. He regrets nothing.

"Where is everyone?" The station is eerily quiet for a day spent trying to get ahead of a falling building.

"Burrito run. Buck volunteered to stay behind. He still getting carsick in traffic?"

"Let's just say we've been putting the emesis bags Howie gave us to very good use. Is he busy?" Tommy lifts the bag in his hand so Bobby can see the grinning face of the Colonel himself. "I come bearing gifts."

Bobby laughs the laugh of a man who knows firsthand that Evan's insatiable cravings for KFC's mashed potatoes are the only thing keeping the lights on at the location on W Pico Boulevard. He gestures past Tommy toward the engines. "Last I saw him, he was giving a class on proper hose maintenance."

"Appreciate it, Bobby," he says and starts heading in that direction.

"Tell him he'd better not be promoting bad coupling habits." Tommy turns around, wide-eyed, but Bobby's already got a hand up to forestall the laughter he must know is inevitable. Bobby's grimacing so hard it looks like he might severe his carotid. "I regretted it the second I said it. Do me a favor and phrase it a little better?"

"I make no promises." Snickering, Tommy turns back to the engines and swings the KFC bag cheerfully as he goes, making a mental note to mention this in the OG 118 group chat. That ought to give Howie enough ammo to last through Christmas. 

As he rounds Engine 3, he hears the susurrus of voices, which he expected, but as he gets closer he realizes it's just one voice, which he didn't. He comes to a stop right where the engine's rear strip on the storage compartment ends and ducks behind it a little to try and figure out exactly what he's looking at.

Bobby had said Evan was teaching and Tommy figured that meant he was holding court with the station's two newest recruits, but he's kneeling on the floor and carefully re-rolling a hose while he talks to an audience of precisely zero.

"Now this is called a straight roll," Evan says, voice modulated to be slow and easily understood. It's textbook perfect pacing. Tommy has no clue who it's for. Maybe he's filming a video? "I'm folding the male coupling over and then rolling it to the female coupling, which are unnecessarily gendered terms, but I wasn't in the room when they came up with the names, so."

Tommy's so distracted by how the muscles in Evan's arms strain against the sleeves of his uniform as he methodically rolls the hose that he almost misses what Evan says next.

"Now Daddy wants to do a Dutch roll, because it takes about five seconds and it's hilarious, but Grandpa Bobby would slaughter Daddy if he ever found out. Apparently letting the couplings drag on the ground is the eighth deadly sin." Evan rests back on his shins and pants a little, then pats the planetary curve of his belly with a grin. "Hope you're taking notes, probie. There will be a test."

There are two things in Tommy's life that he will never be able to forget, even if he had a full-frontal lobotomy; even if he wanted to:

The first is the way Evan's shoulders curled inwards as if bracing for a blow while he haltingly apologized about goading Tommy into fucking him after the condom ripped, about how Tommy didn't have to worry because Evan was relieving him of all responsibility, and that he didn't have any expectations because Tommy never asked for this and he hoped someday Tommy would forgive him for keeping what they'd accidentally created together. 

Tommy isn't a violent man, but sometimes he fantasizes about going back through Evan's life and beating the shit out of everyone who ever made him feel unwanted, or treated him like a consolation prize. Even in the early days of their relationship, when Tommy's respect for certain boundaries or simple acts of kindness would make Evan visibly recalibrate, Tommy had to stop himself from demanding a list of names. He has one now, and part of him would like nothing more than to start with Evan's parents and work his way down.

The second is the teary, disbelieving grin that broke across Evan's face like a sunrise when the sonographer pressed the ultrasound wand to his belly and the room filled with the jackrabbiting whup-whup-whup sound of their kid's heartbeat. Evan had looked over at him, laughed wetly at the struck-dumb expression Tommy knew he was sporting, and said, "Sounds like the Bell 206." 

When he reached out for Tommy, the fluorescent lights had glinted off the engagement band Tommy'd bought like a complete lunatic four months after Evan kissed him in the lobby of First Presbyterian. He'd kept it hidden in his toolbox until three months later, when Evan put on a brave face and tried to let him off the hook. 

But he didn't have far to go, because Tommy was already reaching back for him. The metal of the ring was warm where it pressed against his fingers. And if his heart was so full of love and wonder that he cried a little, no one commented on it. Well, Evan did when they got in Tommy's truck after their appointment and then went straight to KFC, but that was to be expected. He'd taken the ribbing like a champ. 

Watching Evan—now in the second week of his third trimester, the hem of his shirt fighting for its life where it stretches around his belly—earnestly teaching the kid still cooking inside him about proper hose care, Tommy knows he'll never forget this one either. He's pretty sure his life is going to be one unforgettable moment after another from here on out.

Swallowing around the lump in his throat, he walks out from behind the engine and gets a hand under Evan's elbow to help him get to his feet. It takes every ounce of his willpower to stand back and let Evan carry the hose over to its compartment and attach it to the main connection site himself. He's learned to grit his teeth and give help only when it's asked for. He has no desire to start up that argument again.

"So?" Tommy happily takes Evan into his arms while Evan happily takes the KFC bag out of his hand. "Is our kid going to graduate from the Academy or wash out completely?"

Evan grins at him. Tommy knows at least 45% of the love in his eyes is reserved for the mashed potatoes. "I'm calling it now: they're gonna be fire chief by the time they're twenty. Youngest in the entire country. What do you think, probie? You up for the challenge?"

Tommy places a hand gently on Evan's belly and immediately feels movement against his palm. Their kid hasn't given Evan a moment's peace since week 15; at any given moment, they're flipping around in there like they're doing zero-gravity training for a space mission. The familiar fluttering feeling makes his heart cramp. 

That's their kid in there. They made that.

"I think that's a yes," Tommy murmurs, pressing a kiss to Evan's temple, then hanging there for a moment, breathing him in. Breathing them in. "Love you."

"God, I love you so much, you don't even know," Evan says, cracking open a container with a pleased hum.

Tommy smiles dopily, then reality trickles in. "You're talking to the potatoes, aren't you?"

"Of course not," Evan lies through a mouthful of KFC's finest spuds.

[shockercoco]

I Told You So

Timothee Chalamet x reader

Warnings - none, fluff

Word count - 703

a/n -  request: Timothee gets sick halfway through a vacation and worries he’s ruined it but Y/N assures him he didn’t. (They are on vacation so Timothee can take a break from working so much) - it's kind of short, but I hope you enjoy :)

Timothee had been sick for a couple days leading up to the day the two of you were supposed to leave for vacation. You had told him several times that you were fine with canceling the trip or postponing it for a later time when he felt better, but each time he would brush you off and tell you that he was fine.

After all, there were only a handful of times throughout the year where he wasn’t busy filming or attending press events. When he did have time off, he used it to make up for all the lost time between the two of you.

“It’s just a small cold,” Timothee had told you the night before the trip.

His head felt heavy and cloudy, his nose was clogged so he couldn't smell, and his body ached. Overall, he felt like shit, but he didn’t want to let that stop you guys. He knew you had been looking forward to this vacation for months, and he didn’t want you having to take care of him during his time off.

“Babe, just a couple days ago you were telling me how terrible you felt, and now all of a sudden you feel better?” you countered. “ You’re sick, Timothee, just admit it.”

Somehow, he hadn’t gotten you sick, despite being around you practically every minute of the day. Your back was to him as you continued to clean the kitchen. You could hear his feet moving against the tile floor, coming closer to you, but you kept your back facing him. He took the cloth you were using to clean the counters out of your hand, trying to get your attention. You let out a sigh as you lean against the counter and let your eyes meet his. 

“I promise you, I’m good to go on this trip,” he insists as he gives you a reassuring smile, hoping you would just drop it.

Which you do. Against your better judgement, you let Timothee convince you. Throughout the plane ride, you kept looking over at him to make sure he was okay – he had noticed this out of the corner of his eye, but he chose to ignore it.

When the two of you had arrived at your rented villa on the beach, It was Timothee’s idea to not rest and to explore the area. The two of you had even gone for a swim in the ocean later that night.

On the second day of your vacation is when Timothee took a turn for the worse. When he woke up that morning, he felt like had gotten hit by a truck, he had no energy to move. He knew he couldn’t lie to you anymore.

“I’m sorry,” he told you as you gave him some medicine that you had stuffed in your luggage just in case he needed it. And boy did he need it.

“It’s okay, really,” you say as you sit on the bed next to him. You place the back of your hand on his forehead to check his temperature.

“No, it’s not okay. I didn’t want you to have to take care of me on your vacation. I ruined it for you,” he sighs as he looks at you. He felt awful, and it wasn’t from the pounding headache he had.

“You didn’t ruin it, Timothee,” you reassure him.

“But we can’t do any of the things you wanted to do,” he says.

“We’ll be here for another week, I’m sure you’ll feel better in a couple of days. The most important part is that I get to spend time with you,” you say as you run a hand through his curls. 

“Yeah, spend time with your sick boyfriend,” he mumbles.

You playfully roll your eyes. “How about you stop complaining and let someone take care of you for once. It’s about time I pay you back for all the times you took care of me.”

Timothee thinks for a moment before saying, “You know what, you’re right. This is overdue. Remember that time when you had food poisoning and you threw up on- "

“Don’t say another word,” you cut him off. He just gives you a smirk in return.

Like what you see? check out my masterlist :)

[lost-in-tokyo]

Need help? Call Toji!

Pairing: Toji Fushiguro x fem!reader

Summary: When a mission drains you mentally and physically, you see yourself seeking for security and help from none other than Toji Fushiguro, your friend’s dad. 

Word count: 2,4k

Warnings: Toji actually raised Megumi in this one. Reader is in her early 20s and is a sorcerer. Cheating (reader has a boyfriend), oral (female receiving), bathroom sex, doggy style, manting press, multiple orgarsms, unprotected sex, creampie, hair pulling, scratching, ass slapping, daddy kink, age gap, fingering, mentions of blood (reader gets hurt in a mission). Did I forget something?

Being friends with Megumi certainly had many advantages, he was a great listener and always gave honest advice and opinions, he had excellent taste in music and generally didn't complain about listening to you talk nonstop. But surely the best of all was getting to see his dad wearing those tight t-shirts that left nothing to the imagination when you visited their house.

You could still remember the first time you came to the boy's house. It was on a Saturday afternoon, Yuji and Nobara were determined to have a video game championship, and to change the atmosphere a little, Megumi suggested that they did it at his house .

It was a hot summer afternoon and he was outside mowing the lawn, covered in a fine sheen of sweat and wearing only a pair of worn jeans. He wiped the sweat off his forehead with his forearm before slowly looking you up and down.

“Excuse me, does Megumi live here?” You tried to be as polite as possible while holding the hem of your skirt, which between us, wasn't the longest you had.

A light chuckle ripped from his throat before he answered. “Yeah, they’re inside.”

That was a few years ago, and every time you came over to Megumi's, you couldn't deny that you made as much effort as possible not to get nervous and end up stumbling over your own words when the older Fushiguro spoke to you.

It's not that you were in love, far from it, but his incredible height and his heavy layer of muscle intimidated you in an exciting way. Every time that smirk crossed his face as he looked at you, and every time those callused hands touched you in the most unpretentious way possible, you couldn't stop the thoughts that flooded your mind, thinking about what it would be like to hear him moan your name, or how many times he could make you come.

This was wrong.

So wrong!

Especially because you had a boyfriend.

It had been a few months, you had known him through work and he was always a great boyfriend. He did all your wishes, treated you like a princess and was there for everything you needed, but still, you called him when you needed help.

It was late on a Friday night, you had a bleeding leg and your whole body ached after a traumatic mission that went completely off-plan. You had managed to exorcize the curse, but you had paid a high price for it.

Moisture hung in the air, creating a thin layer of haze that lit up as the Toyota pickup that now had several shades of orange, thanks to rust, pulled up. One of its headlights had given out and the car could definitely use a good wash, but you didn't care, as seeing that truck was all you needed to instantly calm down.

“Need a ride, kid?” There was a certain mocking tone to his voice, and even in the dark, you were sure he had a smirk plastered on his face.

You opened the door of the pickup, climbing into the passenger seat, whose leather had dried out and split in places several years ago.

"Hurting?" He referred to your bloodied leg, bound by a belt, which had once been around your waist, to stop the bleeding.

"It still burns, I think I'll need stitches."

"Let's go to my place, I'll help ya with that when we get there."

You nodded slightly, leaning your head back against the seat as you listened to the sound of Black Sabbath coming out of the car's sound system.

The house was all dark, and as you went through the rooms you began to look for the presence of a certain someone.

"He's at Yuji's, helping with something." Toji replied, almost reading your mind.

You followed him upstairs, past his room and into his bathroom.

It was the first time you had entered this part of the house. His room had light walls and dark wood furniture, there was an orangey rug on the floor, but everything looked somehow organized.

His bathroom had gray tiles and a large mirror over the white vanity. The scent of his perfume was much stronger here than the rest of the house, and you could stare at his toiletries for a second before he spoke again.

“Ya can sit on the sink, I’ll take a look at yer wound.”

You did as he said as he crouched down, pulling out a vial of rubbing alcohol and gauze for a bandage. After rummaging through a drawer he found a box with some needles and a small spool of black thread.

He positioned himself in front of you, and then his icy fingers touched your thighs half covered by the fabric of your uniform skirt, making a shiver hit you.

“Don't worry, I won't look.” He assured as he spread your legs slightly apart, before lifting the foot of your injured leg and resting it on the surface of the vanity, making your back rest against the mirror.

For the first time you felt embarrassed. You were fully aware that Toji was seeing your pink panties, despite him acting like he wasn't.

He removed the belt as gently as he could, before taking a good look at your cut.

“That curse got ya good, huh? It didn't cut any arteries though”. Toji looked up, fixing his dark gaze in your eyes, that looked like those of a deer who had just seen the headlights of a car coming towards it. Your pupils were dilated and your eyes looked a shade darker than normal.

He backed away a little, pulling a black lighter from his front pants pocket and running the needle through its flame a few times. After managing to fit the thread and tie the knot he looked at you, almost with resentment for the pain you were about to feel.

“This is goin’ to hurt a little.”

His hands, now a little warmer, touched the inner part of your thigh, making a shiver run through your body. He squeezed your flesh making you gasp slightly before he inserted the needle for the first time.

A groan of pain left your throat and your hands balled into fists, pushing its nails as deep as possible in an attempt to distract your mind from the pain you felt below.

Toji continued the procedure, making eye contact with you at each stitch that was completed, he knew it wasn't time, but he couldn't stop his member from hardening and throbbing with each moan that came out of your lips, that seemed to be oh so soft.

Despite the pain, Toji's hot breath hitting your core, and the touch of his fingers so close to your most intimate area, was making the situation more and more difficult, not because of the pain, but because the pain just made the heat between your legs get worse.

"All done!" Toji was many things, but naive wasn’t one of them. He saw the small pool that formed in your little pink panties, and he saw the way you futilely tried to find a position that would help ease the heat you were feeling.

“Ya want me to take care of this too?” One of his thick fingers ran up and down your cunt, making you catch your breath to repress a moan.

"What do ya say? Want daddy to take care of this pretty lil’ pussy?”

You felt yourself clenching against nothing as you nodded, feeling your cheeks heat up as you maintained eye contact.

"Use your words, sweetheart.”

"Yes please." You said after a moment.

"Please, what?"

“Please, Daddy.”

A smirk spread across Toji's features as he crouched down, resting your freshly treated leg over his shoulder and bringing his face close to your warmth.

He roamed your territory, rubbing his nose against the fabric of your panties, taking a long sniff to absorb the scent of it before giving it a full lick.

Toji pulled your panties to the side, touching your clit masterfully with the tip of his tongue while one of his long fingers penetrated you with ease, thanks to your juices. It didn't take long for him to find your sweet spot, stimulating it while continuing the ministrations with his tongue.

He smiled as your fingers found his hair, tugging lightly at the strands in an attempt to bring him closer. Your soft moans were like the sweetest music to his ears and your taste was like a first meal for a man who had never eaten. He was hungry.

Hungry for you.

Toji had lost track of how many times he had found himself jerking off late at night thinking about you and your little skirts, the way you smiled and the way you said "Mr Fushiguro". It was too much for him. For years he had imagined this moment and now that it had finally happened, he was in no hurry.

Soon Toji's movements had you in a state of frenzy, you felt a knot forming in your belly and it tensed more and more until it burst out with a loud and clear moan, which made his member get even harder, if that was possible.

“I need to fuck ya now.” He grunted, picking you up in his arms before tossing you almost carelessly onto the bed.

You admired while Toji undressed, removing all his clothes, leaving lastly a pair of black boxers that deliciously marked the shape of his member, whose head spilled out of the garment.

He walked over to the bed, pulling you close by your ankle and helping you out of your clothes as quickly as possible, throwing them in all directions across the room before pushing you again.

“It will hurt a little, princess.” He said smirking, before spreading your legs and entering you all at once, not giving you time to adjust.

Toji was right, you weren't used to his size and at first you felt a delicious burning that soon disappeared and was replaced by pure pleasure. You could feel every inch of him, every pulsing vein passing through your tight walls making him groan.

Fushiguro thrust into you with power and mastery, hitting all the right spots. He would grab whatever piece of flesh of yours that was available, your breasts, your ass and pull you close by your shoulders while keeping a pace too fast for you to be quiet.

“Pussy so tight… so good” He leaned down, his mouth taking a hold of one of your nipples as his right hand played with the other.

Your moans echoed through the room as your nails scratched the skin on his back. “Mo-more.” You managed to say, getting hit with a particularly hard thrust before Toji sped his movements even more.

“Look at you, begging for more from someone who isn't your boyfriend. What a bad girl you are!” He tormented you, speaking with his voice, now husky with desire, close to your ear as his hands pushed your thighs until your knees almost touched your shoulders, causing his cock to reach even deeper inside you.

Your mind collapsed and your eyes rolled into the back of your head as the second orgasm of the night hit you, making your legs tremble against his muscular arms.

“Tell me y/n, does he make you cum like this?”

Nothing but a few incomprehensible moans came out of your mouth, still very bewildered with the pleasure that had consumed you. Toji's movements slowed down, coming to almost a stop, causing you to regain consciousness to the point of absorbing his question.

"No!” You almost screamed. “He doesn’t." Your voice much lower now, but still desperate for him to resume his movements, your voice a little hoarse from moaning too loud.

Toji smirked before a dry chuckle ripped from his throat, as if he'd known the answer all along. He pulled out of you ignoring your whimpering and turning you around, placing you on all fours on the mattress of his bed.

Before you could register what was happening, Toji thrusted into you all at once, keeping your back arched as he pulled your hair into a ponytail. His free hand hit your ass precisely a few times, adding to the wave of pleasure that consumed you.

“Toji!” You moaned loudly, your eyes closing, unable to think of anything else but the thick cock fucking you and the man it belonged to.

“You don't know how long I've waited to hear this.” He chuckled lightly, his hand letting go of your hair and bringing you close by the neck. His lips touched your ear, allowing you to hear his every grunt and moan as clearly as possible.

It wasn't long after that familiar feeling started to creep up again, you gripped his arm with both hands, unsure if you could hold yourself in that position much longer.

"Not yet." he gasped. "Together!"

You nodded in agreement, groaning almost tiredly.

Toji sped up his movements, hitting you as deep as possible, making you see stars and moan his name like a mantra, like it was the only word you knew. Outside the room, your moans mixed with the wet sound of your pussy and Toji’s balls hitting you repeatedly could be heard more than clearly.

“Now, doll! Come for me!” Toji pulled you closer, leaning down to kiss your lips, his tongue invading your mouth and quickly gaining dominance, while your nails found the skin of his arms and the strongest orgasm of your entire life took over your body.

Toji's calloused fingers delved into the strands of your hair, pulling you impossibly closer as he filled you to the brim with his thick cum and you shivered uncontrollably against the muscles of his abdomen.

When you finally pulled away, your eyes shed a few tears, your body was exhausted and if it wasn't for Toji holding your waist you would have collapsed on the bed.

Toji admired your state for a few seconds. Hair all messed up, mascara all smudged and irregular breathing, your lips were swollen and he could see his cum running down your legs.

He pinched your cheeks with his thumb and forefinger, keeping your gaze locked with his. “Fuck… are you sure you still want to date that asshole?”

Roblogs, comments and likes are very much appreciated <3

Masterlist

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Am I the asshole for not noticing I hurt my friend's feelings?

I (24F) had a somewhat close friend (24F) whom I've known since highschool but only got closer to recently. I've had a friend crush on her forever and apparently she did too. We share a lot of interests and we're both neurodivergent (I'm diagnosed with adhd, and we're almost certain she has autism). We also sort of bonded over a shared trauma -- basically we got two-timed several years ago by a really abusive asshole.

Anyway something happened a couple of months ago and I feel our friendship has gone downhill since then. It was multiple occasions really: what would happen is that I would say something impulsively, and she would misinterpret it and get sensitive about it, we talk it out, I apologize, and we move on. But one time it was a bit too much that i burst into tears while texting her because I felt I really hurt her and I felt that all my friendships will go downhill because whenever I get comfortable with someone I just completely lose my filter and end up hurting them. What happened that day was that we were hanging out and a guy apparently told her something sexist but I didn't hear him. She came to me to complain and I sort of brushed it off because from the way she said it happened it just seemed he was vaguely pointing out something but I later understood that I was just wrong. Then her dress had a tiny hole which I pointed out to her in front of my boyfriend rather impulsively and she got really upset about that. Later on I was telling her about a book I'd read that had great autism representation that didn't have the character just be -- and here I did the dinosaur arms thing (no offense whatsoever to people who do that; I know full well it's a common thing, I was just saying the character had more to him than just that). The problem is that she didn't hear the part where I was talking about a book character because we were changing tables in a crowded cafe and I was just talking non-stop because that's what I do and she thought I just did the dinosaur arms out of nowhere and got offended but didn't say so except over text later and just looked unwell for the rest of the next half hour before she suddenly excused herself and left. That day she texted me about all of these things and we talked it out and I pretended that I was not literally having a meltdown all while apologizing (but not before I tried to plead my case a bit). This all happened on the same day, but before that there were other occasions too. One time she would be talking about something, then I change the subject, then she'd say I know you didn't mean to but I wanted you to give a reply to what I just said. Another time we had a particularly bad exam which I did okay on, but she was telling about how she botched it. I couldn't tell from her face how serious it was and I gave her what i thought was a sympathetic smile (which she later told me was a weird smile) because I really didn't know what to say and then turned away to look for my boyfriend to check on him as well. She told me that day that she felt that I brushed her off when she was having a difficult time and didn't console her enough.

It's just multiple things that made me feel that I need to be more on guard around her for her sake. She moved to another city recently and even before that we were texting less and less. I even asked her if she was upset about the cafe day and she said no since I apologized and we talked it out, but I could feel something in our relationship changed. It just felt like such a shame because I felt a great connection between us and I have massive difficulties when it comes to making friends. She was sort of my last friend that I felt close to aside from my boyfriend, and now I can't help thinking that the problem has always been me.

Sorry if the post was too long and sorry for the sob story lol

[orcasoul]

The swimming lesson

Summary: The reader is friends with Joel and Ellie. During a trek one day the reader embarrassingly admits she can't swim and Ellie suggests that Joel could teach her. Her and Joel arrange a day for her first lesson and they both end up getting more than they bargained for!

Warnings: Smut, under 18's DNI, swearing, use of Y/N.

Italics indicate inward thinking.

This is my first ever attempt at writing smut, so I apologise if it's not that good. Please go easy on me 🙈

Word Count: 7,335

The stifling Wyoming summer sunshine rained it's searing rays down on the three of you as you made your way through the coniferous woodland. Slivers of golden light trickle lazily through the swaying leaves, bathing the trees, the ground and your companions in a luminous glow. The soft breeze blows loose strands from your braid across your face, tickling your nose and cheeks. "Uh, sweating my "balls" off out here," Ellie groaned for the thousandth time. "Hey you wanted to go for a hike, kiddo," Joel blithely reminded her. "Didn't think we'd be out this long," she replied in a teasing tone. "I thought you'd be used to all this walking after coming all the way from Boston," you countered with a smirk and raised eyebrow. "Touche," she answered amusedly. "You're right though, it is scorching out here," you agree as you lethargically drag your feet, kicking up lose rocks and twigs. Joel on the other hand seems to be taking everything in his stride. After journeying across country and the endless smuggling ventures in Boston, a stroll in the wilderness was a piece of cake for him. Over the summer you, Joel and Ellie had taken up trekking for fun, and even though Ellie complained about the heat she actually loved these little adventures, often being the one to arrange these trips.

You loved them too. For years you'd explored the woodland alone after one of your closest friends' had decided the outdoors wasn't for her. Apart from her patrol shifts she rarely left Jackson. But for you a walk in the wild yonder was rejuvenating, a peaceful solace when you could pretend that the world hadn't changed, that people still went about their normal lives, shops were open, cars were running and children could play outdoors and just be children. Maybe this is why Ellie loved these excursions. She had the chance to be a carefree child for a while. After doing this alone for so long it was a welcome change to have company. Joel and Ellie's arrival several months ago was the talk of the town, even if they only stayed for one night. But their return a short while after and their decision to call Jackson home sent a buzz through the community. It's a rare thing for new people to join the town and a lot of the women fawned over Joel the second they saw him return. You couldn't blame them, really. A woman would have to be blind to not find Joel incredibly handsome, but some of them seemed to be all too eager to catch his attention, flirting shamelessly, constantly offering him drinks at the Tipsy Bison and generally making desperate, doe eyed fools of themselves.

You'd noticed over recent months how those women gave you death glares across the bar and the mess hall as you and Joel began to spend more time together. It was inevitable, really. Maria and you were good friends and Joel being Tommy's brother meant you'd unintentionally spent a lot of time with him and his adopted daughter and things just naturally progressed from there, to the point that you'd go to the Tipsy Bison together, have meals at each other's houses and take these leisurely walks. If you were being honest with yourself, you'd been harbouring a crush on the grouchy man from the moment you'd met him and over time those feelings had grown into something much deeper. But you felt it was best if you kept those feelings hidden, seeing as Joel didn't seem all that interested in the whole dating scene. Plenty of times you'd seen him rebuff the not so subtle advances of horny women, mumbling something and walking away from their attempts at seduction to join you, Tommy and Maria at your table. You couldn't resist the urge to smirk at their annoyed expressions and you couldn't deny the relief you felt every time he rejected them. It would have been heartbreaking to watch him take a woman home. But you're not stupid. He's a man with needs after all, and you'd overheard a few of the single women tell their friends that they'd spent the night with Joel. But by the sound of it, that's all it seemed to be; a one night stand.

And that was before the two of you had become friends, which made that bitter pill a little easier to swallow. But in recent months you'd noticed how he couldn't seem to get away from these vultures quick enough when they tried their luck. A part of you hoped, maybe foolishly, that he rebuffed them because maybe, just maybe, he had feelings for you too. But the logical part of your mind kept telling you that was wishful thinking and to not look too much into it. If only your yearning heart would listen to your sensible mind, alas it's never that simple. So you tried your best to ignore your feelings, even though sometimes you could swear you'd caught the odd lingering stare from him, subtle touches lasting longer than necessary, such as when he'd pull you up a steep incline and not immediately release your hand, or when he opened a door for you to walk through and his hand would nestle at the small of your back. Of course it could just be his way of being friendly and polite and maybe you're only seeing what you want to see. So it was for the best to try and suppress any fanciful thoughts and just focus on being his friend. After all, you'd rather have Joel as a friend than not at all.

And now here you are, traipsing through the picturesque landscape with your two favourite people. It's nearing late afternoon now and you swear the sun's heat has spiked just to torture you, sweat rolling down your neck and soaking the top of your tank top. The breeze seems to have vanished too, making the woodland feel like an unforgiving inferno. You watched as Joel led the way along the trail, the broad expanse of his back capturing your attention in a mesmerising allure. You noticed how his sweaty black T-shirt stuck to the planes and muscles of his physique and if you hadn't pretty much sweated all of the water from your body already, you're certain you'd be drooling now. God, does this man even know how beautiful he is? An unexpected outburst from Ellie snapped you out of your momentary ogling. "Oh hell yeah!" She exclaimed, excitedly as she darted off down a trail to the right. "Ellie," Joel shouted as he ran after her, glancing over his shoulder to make sure you were following. As you descend the slight incline you gasp at the sight before you. A small and placid lake with a small jetty (probably built for fishing before the outbreak), surrounded by low lying vegetation and trees sat hidden away as if it's beauty is to sacred for just anyone to see it.

The colour of the water seemed almost unnatural, the dazzling azure of the shore giving way to cobalt blue the further out you looked. The mostly still water rippled now and then as fish came to the surface to devour unsuspecting bugs, while the sunlight glistened and shimmered off the glass like surface. Birds warbled to each other in the trees and you found yourself lost in the moment. A moment to appreciate the radiance and serenity this post apocalyptic world has managed to retain. Beauty, simplicity, harmony; It can all still be found if you take the time to look for it, and with that comes the joy of knowing that not everything had been destroyed. These moments should be cherished, maybe now more than ever. "Wow it's stunning!" you breathed out in awe, eyes fixated on the scene gracing you. "Bombs away!" Ellie yelled as she dropped her pack and ran to the end of the jetty. Her cannonball entrance startled the birds feeding on the shore close by, forcing them to take to the air. After a few moments she breaks the surface with the goofiest grin on her face, while pushing loose, soaked strands out of her eyes.

"You two gotta try this!" she beamed. Joel rolled his eyes in mock annoyance, as he always did when she got carried away. "I don't think so, kiddo," he replied, folding his arms. Ellie huffed, "Fine, you old grouch. You have no idea what you're missing." "I'm sure I don't," Joel smirked. "What about you Y/N?" Ellie asked hopefully. "Um....," you began. "Go on in if you want," Joel insisted with a soft smile that almost made you knees buckle, "I'll keep an eye out." "I...um...," you falter, cheeks turning redder than the heat already made them. Joel raised his eyebrows, puzzled by your awkward response. "Come on," Ellie pressed, almost impatiently, kicking her legs up in front of her. "Don't make me swim alone." You look to Ellie, then to Joel sheepishly. "I can't swim," you confess with a shrug. "Really?" Joel seemed genuinely surprised. You shake your head, embarrassment creeping over you at your lack of knowledge of a skill that could one day save your life.

"Joel can teach you. He taught me," Ellie offered while twirling in the water. "Would you Joel?" you ask, unable to hide the excitement in your voice. "Sure thing, darling," Joel replied, his southern drawl becoming more prominent on the last word. "And don't worry about drowning. Joel will give you the kiss of life," Ellie interjected with a wink and a smirk at you, that suggested she knew something you didn't. "Ellie!" Joel snapped, his flushed cheeks matching your own. "What?" Ellie shrugged nonchalantly, "Just saying is all." Joel looked at you and smiled shyly. You've never seen Joel look so flustered the whole time you've known him and you couldn't help but find him suddenly endearing, provoking a shy smile of your own to break out across your face. "So when can we do this?" you asked quickly, before Joel can change his mind. "Guess we could do it tomorrow?" he suggested. "Cool, tomorrow it is!" You confirmed with a big grin. Your mind was racing with excitement and nerves on the walk back to Jackson. You and Joel would be alone in the water, physically closer than you've ever been before. Just the thought of his big, strong hands holding you in the water was enough to dampen your panties with desire. Stop it! you chastised yourself. He doesn't like you like that. But then why did Ellie wink? And why did Joel seem so awkward? Maybe... nope, nope he doesn't, you try to convince your overly hopeful mind.

Joel could kill Ellie sometimes. That girl is too smart and too perceptive for her own good. For months Joel was convinced he'd successfully concealed his feelings for you, but all this time Ellie could see straight through his facade. His heart thumped nervously in his chest as a thought crossed his mind. If Ellie saw it the whole time, could Y/N? His mouth became dry at the thought that you might have known all along, and for the sake of your friendship had decided to not acknowledge it. But now Ellie had let the cat out of the bag and there's no going back. The last thing he would want is to ruin the friendship the three of you had built over the months. Joel know's he's not the type to easily make friends but the more time he'd unintentionally spent around you, the more he realised he enjoyed your company. Your cheery disposition seemed to balance out his gruff and often grumpy demeanour and in no time at all he'd found himself falling hard for you. So much so that he no longer sought out meaningless one night stands with Jackson's women. He only wanted you. He'd often lie awake at night fantasising about taking you in his arms and worshipping your body as you deserve.

How he'd take his time exploring every inch of you, caressing your smooth skin and bringing you over the edge with his tongue again and again until you were begging him to fuck you. But every time he dared to hope that you could feel the same way he had to remind himself that a young, beautiful, graceful woman like you, who could have any man she wanted, wouldn't look twice at an man two decades older than her. And if the most he could get from you is your friendship, he'd gladly take that any day. He just hopes that Ellie's ill timed but well intended faux pas hasn't now caused irreparable damage. He noticed you'd been unusually quiet for most of the walk back, but then again so had he. Ellie of course filled the, what would have been, uncomfortable silence with her shitty puns and random comments about anything and everything that entered her mind. For once Joel was glad of Ellie's non stop blabber as it eased the air of awkwardness between you both as the two of you fell into conversation with her and eventually each other once again.

The three of you arrive home as the sun coats the evening sky in gold and pink hues, casting long shadows over the town, the calm air cooling to a more bearable temperature. "So.....," you turned to Joel before having to break away to make your way to your own house, "See you bright and early tomorrow?" "Yep, see you then, Y/N," he responded with a light pat on your shoulder, looking directly into your eyes. Just the slightest touch from Joel set your body buzzing. You don't think you've craved anyone so much in your entire life. Feeling a bit bashful under the gaze of his caramel brown eyes, you try your best to compose yourself and, looking between Joel and Ellie you bid them both a good night with a warm smile, then begin to walk away. "Night," Ellie chirps at you while waving, ".....and enjoy your lesson tomorrow!" she calls over her shoulder in an obvious teasing tone. You look back and chuckle when you see Joel gently shove her forward and mumble something at her in exasperation.

The lake sparkled in the early morning sunshine. The flawless surface, reflecting the world above the shoreline in a perfect mirror image resonated deep within you, reminding you once again of why you love to be out in the middle of nature. "Okay, ready for your first lesson?" Joel spoke in his authoritative dad voice as if he was addressing Ellie, which made you stifle a giggle. He dropped his backpack on the ground and pulled out a pair of knee length shorts. "Ready as I'll ever be," you reply enthusiastically. "Be right back," Joel said as he walked off behind a tree to change into the shorts. As he returned he noticed you trying to suppress a smile. Trying and failing. He cocks an eyebrow. "What?" "Nothing, you..... I just never thought I'd see grumpy Joel Miller looking so casual in a pair of shorts," you chuckled behind your hand. "Shut up," Joel playfully scolded you with a hint of discomfiture in his voice. "Aren't you going to change?" Joel inquired while looking over your jeans and T shirt. "You wont be able to swim in them." "One step ahead of you Miller," you grinned while removing your boots and socks, then taking off your top and Jeans to reveal a shocking pink bikini. Joel's jaw had never hit the floor so fast in his life! Heat spread through his cheeks and down south at the sight the sight of you in a bikini. Suddenly he felt like a teenager who'd seen boobs for the first time. You were mesmerising!

His gaze quickly trailed over your exposed body, from the curve of your hips to the valley between your pert breasts, supported perfectly by the thin materiel of your bikini top and finally up to your face. He cleared his throat and shifted awkwardly as you looked at him a little bashfully and he realised he'd been caught staring just a little too long. "Shall we?" you gestured to the lake then turned to disguise the slight smirk that had broken out across your face. You are so glad you'd decided to check the old suitcases during a patrol to the ski lodge a few weeks ago, and found this little gem. You were initially hesitant about wearing it in front of Joel. It's been so long since you'd worn a bikini and the though of being so exposed felt quite foreign now, but judging by Joel face you couldn't have looked too bad in it. His reaction had set something off in your brain. Maybe he is attracted to me, after all? Maybe he's always wanted me as much as I want him..... or maybe it's just been a while since he's seen an (almost) naked woman, well... he's a man at the end of the day.

You're rational mind decided it was best to settle on that last reason and not dwell on it. You follow Joel into the water, nervously stepping further out until the surface is lapping at your waist. "It's effing freezing!" you shrieked cheerfully, while holding your hands above the water. "Wimp," Joel teased as he looked back at you, instantly noticing how your nipples poked through your bikini top. He spun his head back around, trying to gather his thoughts. "Just a little further," he coaxed. "It's not too deep." You swallow apprehensively and wade out a bit further until the water is level with your chest. You close the gap between you and Joel, suddenly feeling a warmth spread through you despite the frigid water. How can he have such an effect on me?... Focus, idiot! You look up into Joel's mahogany eyes and for a moment neither of you say anything or even move. Forget the fear of drowning in the lake, you're already drowning in those big, expressive, puppy dog eyes! Joel looks as nervous as you feel, the air so thick with sexual tension that you'd forgotten to breath.

You slowly release the breath you'd been unknowingly holding, your chest shuddering slightly as it escaped. It didn't go unnoticed by Joel, who was trying his best to keep it together when all he wanted to do was take you in his arms, taste you, feel you..... His jaw ticked as he cleared his throat again. "So..." Joel begins, awkwardly, "The first thing ya need to learn is how to stay afloat in an emergency." Joel's head begins to clear a little as he focuses on the lesson. "If you're in deep water and getting tired just lay on your back with your arms and legs spread out like a starfish." He demonstrated the position briefly, then stood back up and walked back over to you. Your eyes lustfully trailed over his torso as he made his way back. His soaked T-shirt clung to every inch of his chest and you suppressed the urge to bit your bottom lip. "Okay, you try." "But I'll sink," you protested timorously. "No you won't. I won't let ya," he reassured you with a small smile. "I'll keep my hand under your back and only let go when you're feeling confident, Okay?"

His soft and reassuring gaze helped to settle your unease. You've always trusted Joel and if he says he won't let you sink, then you're perfectly safe. "Okay..." you agree with a bit more confidence. As you begin to lean back you feel his hand lightly press against your back. What you weren't expecting was for his other hand to sweep across the back of your thighs to bring your legs to the surface with the rest of your body. A shot of arousal shot straight to your sex at the contact, your pussy clenching around nothing, while trying to keep your breathing steady. While floating you make sure to focus on the clear blue sky above you and not on Joel. Damn it, if you make eye contact now, you'll lose the last bit of composure you're just about clinging to. "There you go Y/N, you got it. Doing so well," Joel praised, softly.

Maybe it was just your heightened state of arousal but Joel's low, smooth voice sent a shudder rippling through you, exciting every inch of your body. It's enough to drive you to distraction! If he felt you shudder you could at least blame it on the cold water and hide the fact that he's so easily making you feel like a horny schoolgirl. You're so preoccupied with keeping your waning composure in check that you don't notice that Joel is having just as hard a time focusing as you are. Seeing your entire body laid out before him, (and almost naked for God sake), is the sweetest torture he's ever had to endure. He can't help it but his eyes momentarily drift to your chest, relishing the sight of your pebbled nipples poking through the thin fabric of your bathing suit, the way the water runs down each breast. God, how he longs to run his fingers over your silky looking skin and gently pinch your nipple until you moan..... Fuck, he groaned inwardly. He shouldn't be looking at you and thinking about you like this. You're his friend for crying out loud, his much younger friend too! He shakes his head as though it would erase every sinful thought invading his mind.

"Okay," he breathed, "I'm gonna let go now, darling." He slowly removes his hands, much to your disappointment, and your body begins to float. You're amazed at how easily you bob on the surface and can't hold back an elated squeal. "Joel, I'm actually floating. I'm doing it, look!" Joel's heart felt like it just grew in size at your carefree and childlike happiness. Seeing you smile, hearing you laugh reminds him that there is still beauty in this world. "Good job, sweetheart," Joel commended with a grin, "knew you could do it." After a few moments of savouring the sensation of almost weightlessness you lowered your feet to the bottom and decided your are brave enough to try again, without assistance. You beam with excitement as the movements come to you so effortlessly. "You're a natural," Joel crooned. Giggling you place your feet back down and turn to face Joel, who looked like a proud dad at his kids' school play. With exhilaration still buzzing through your veins you look up into Joel's eyes with a broad grin, "Thank you for- Arrrrgh!!!..."

Joel felt as though he was going to have a heart attack as a sudden burst of adrenaline ripped through him. Before he could even fully register what was happening you had gripped onto his neck, wrapped your legs tightly around his stomach and tried to crawl higher up his torso. The sheer, unexpected force of your body slamming into his knocked him off balance. He stumbled back while instinctively wrapping his arms around you, just managing to steady himself before falling back and taking you under with him. "What the fuck?!" Joel yelled, his face matching the panic on your own. "Something's down there! It touched me! It fucking touched me!" You screamed while while still trying to crawl up him. Joel sighed a breath of relief. "It's just a fish. There's plenty of them in here. They ain't gonna hurt you," He reassured you while trying to suppress a smirk. However his voice betrayed the fact that he now found your reaction amusing. "Hey, it's not fucking funny, okay!" you smiled as you slapped his shoulder. "It scared the shit out of me!" "And you scared the shit outta me! Can't do that to an old man!" Joel retorted lightheartedly.

You chuckled while nervously looking around for a few moments, not that you can see anything under the water, then turn your attention fully to Joel. You've never been this close to him before and you find yourself transfixed by his eyes. You notice the varying shades of brown and how they blend so intricately together, as if nature itself is an artist and Joel is the masterpiece. Those beautiful, expressive orbs could tell a thousand stories and you wish to know every one of them, the good and the bad. But the story they seem to be conveying now is one of nervousness and..... want? It feels as though he's looking past your own eyes and into your very soul, discovering secrets and desires deep within. You feel vulnerable and exposed and you like it. You're not sure how long you've both been staring at one another, when suddenly you are acutely aware that Joel's hands are cupping your ass, on big palm on each cheek, holding you tightly against him. You feel your tits press into his chest with every inhale you take, but you don't want to move.

Joel's brain is still trying to catch up with what exactly just transpired here. With what led you both to being in such an intimate embrace. All he knows for certain is that he owes that fish a huge debt! He never imagined he would eve get to hold you so close and now he never wants to let go. He could be wrong, he could be seeing what he wants to see but he's been around long enough to recognise the look you're giving him in this moment; The look of longing and desire. That, coupled with the fact that your soft and supple ass is currently in his hands has his cock rock hard in his shorts. Thank god you climbed up his body or this would have been really awkward. "Joel," you whisper in a sultry tone, "You can..... you can let go now." You know your expression belies your words. Truthfully you could stay this way forever. Joel notices the contradiction, and it may be foolish of him but he has to know. He has to try or he'll regret it for the rest of his days. "Do you want me to let go?" he asked slowly, chest heaving in anticipation. He's sure you can feel the vibrations of his frantic heartbeat. You almost say yes but your body yearns for his touch, his warmth, and it's obvious now that he doesn't want to let go. You stare into his eyes for a few moments before shaking your head, "No... I don't" you exhale in relief, feeling a weight lifted from you now that you've made it clear you want him. He knows now and there's no going back.

Your gaze leaves his eyes and travels to his plush lips, then return to his eyes, looking for any indication that he's uncomfortable. But all you find is a quiet confirmation that he wants this as much as you do in the way he also looks at your mouth, then to your eyes. Slowly, you lean in, giving him the chance to back away if he changes his mind. But before you can think too much on that Joel closes the gap between you both, pressing his lips to yours. His lips feel as soft as they look, a feather-light touch that sends jolts of electricity down your spine. You slide a hand up into his hair, gently gripping onto his wavy locks. Joel deepens the kiss while sliding his tongue across your bottom lip. You gladly grant him access, savouring the taste and feel of his warm tongue for the first time. What began as a delicate, soft kiss has now become a passionate entanglement of tongues and teeth. You grip his hair harder with both hands to hold his head as you both lick into each other. Joel's fingers dig into your ass cheeks, pushing your already throbbing core to rub against his stomach. You gasp as you involuntarily grind your pussy against him, which causes Joel to grip you tighter and moan into your mouth. A deep, reverberating moan that travels through his chest and into yours, igniting and insatiable need for him to be inside you. Joel breaks away to look into your eyes, his own dark with need.

"Jesus Christ Y/N, you got no idea how badly I want you," Joel rasped while running one hand up the curve of your bare back. A small smile tugs at the corner of your mouth as you playfully run your nose along the curved tip of his. "Show me," you purred against his lips, while running a hand down his stomach, to the hem of his shorts. Joel's brain almost short circuited right then and there. He's pray's, no begs this isn't all a dream. Here you are, the woman he's fallen hopelessly in love with, whom he craves more than oxygen, is asking him to discover her in the most intimate sense. He can't hold back anymore. He's like a man possessed! Grabbing the back of your neck, he crashes his mouth onto yours, his tongue parting your lips and finding your tongue once again. You moan into his mouth as his fingers find the hem of your bikini bottoms, covering your soft lips. He slowly slides a finger underneath the fabric, resulting in your back arching of it's own accord. His tender stroking is enough to send jolts of pleasure throughout your clenching pussy. You run your hand further down and into his shorts, finding his already throbbing cock. Fuck, he's huge! You use your fingers to map out the image, feeling each vein along his length and the sheer width.

You feel a smug sense of satisfaction knowing you are the reason he's so hard right now. You feel his cock twitch as you wrap your hand around him and slowly begin to pump up and down, rubbing your thumb over the sensitive head. The groan you pull from him is primal and only serves to fuel your own arousal more. Joel's now holding you by one ass cheek as his thick and agile fingers tease your entrance. Your grip tightens around his dick as he lightly traces along your folds until he settles on your clit. A high pitched gasp escapes from your throat as Joel begins to rub small circles over the little bundle of nerves, sending tingles all along your cunt and into your lower stomach, the sensitivity causing your whole body to shudder as his strokes become faster and more determined. Unable to focus on anything but the intense pleasure anymore, your moans turns into cries as your face falls to his shoulder and your hand stills on his cock. Joel holds you tight as waves of euphoria radiate across your shuddering frame, seizing your muscles and stealing the air from your lungs. "That's it, good girl. So good for me," Joel purrs in your ear as you come down from your high. "Joel...." you wheeze, breathlessly. "Hmm?" He hums as he nips at your earlobe while squeezing your ass tighter. "I need.... need you inside me....now," you rasp through your delirious haze.

Just hearing you say those words (words he never thought he'd hear from you) has Joel's mind whirling. "I'll give ya what you need sweetheart. I'll take good care of ya, but not in this dirty water. Don't want ya getting an infection, do we?" And with that he grips your plush ass with both hands, pulling you up to wrap your legs tighter around his waist, the unexpected manhandling turning you on even more than you thought possible. He walks you both out of the water and onto the shoreline as if you weigh nothing to him. Joel kisses you again while slowly sliding you down his body until one foot reaches the ground, the other leg is hiked up to his hip, his calloused hand smoothing the soft flesh at the back of your thigh. With a deep groan he releases your leg and walks over to the backpacks, pulling two towels out and laying them on the mossy ground. Joel walks back over to you, wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you off your feet, causing you to giggle, which in turn brings out of him that smile you adore. It's a good thing he has a firm hold of you right now or your knees would give out at such a beautiful sight. He brings you to the towels to lay you down. The cool, mossy ground is almost as soft as a mattress and the thought of having Joel out here in the beauty of the natural world is both freeing and exhilarating! As Joel settles between your legs you sit up and grab the bottom of his T-shirt.

He lifts his arms, allowing you to pull his wet shirt off. His body is a sight to behold! Broad shoulders leading to a toned chest with a scattering of greying chest hair, thick arms almost three times the size of your own, perfectly bronzed and sun kissed skin littered with several scars; A testament of his will and ability to survive in a dangerous and unpredictable world. You suddenly feel like no-one and nothing on this Earth could touch you with this powerhouse of a man at your side. You bite your lower lip and lean in, planting kisses all along his collarbone and move down his chest, running your hands up and down his soft stomach. As you indulge in enjoying Joel's body with your lips and tongue, he reaches around to unclasp your bikini top, letting it fall to the ground. He pulls back to admire the sight gracing his eyes. The image of your bare breasts before him has Joel salivating. His eyes turn dark with lust. He lifts a hand to caress the soft swell of your tit, rolling a pebbled nipple between his thumb and forefinger, just as he'd imagined. Christ, you feel heavenly!

The sound of your sultry sigh only increases the intensity of Joel's burning desire to claim every bit of you. He lowers his head and takes your tit into his mouth, swirling his tongue around your hardened nipple, while palming the other one. Your arms wrap around his head and your head falls back as you arch your back, pushing your chest further into his face. The sounds he's pulling from you only seem to spur him on. After a few more moments he releases your nipple with a satisfying 'Pop' and smirks. "God baby girl, you're perfect," Joel croons, "Tell me what you want." " I want to taste you, Joel." You didn't mean for your voice to sound like a whiny beg but that's all you can muster in your lust filled state. You look down to admire the tent in his shorts. "S'all yours, darling," he grins, his honeyed Texan drawl making you swoon. You eagerly pull his shorts down and his cock springs free, hitting his lower belly and smearing a smattering of precum over his 'treasure trial'. Your eyes widen at the size of him. Your sense of touch didn't deceive you; He really is fucking huge!

Your eyes trail up his thick and veiny member to the purplish tip and without realising you bite your bottom lip again. Joel chuckles, softly, "Like what you see?" "Mmmhmm....," is the only sentence you can articulate in return, your eyes wide in lust as you take in the glorious sight of him. You look up to Joel's face and silently tell him to stand, while you get up on your knees. You delicately take his dick in your hand, your fingers and thumb not even meeting around the girth of it. Slowly and firmly you pump while looking up at Joel, whose eyes are in the process of rolling back into his skull! "Fuck, Y/N, just like that. Feel's so good," he whines. Before he knows it he feels the wet warmth of your mouth enveloping him, your tongue swirling languidly around the head, almost making his knees buckle. He feels himself sink further into your throat, eliciting deep, sensual moans from your chest that vibrate through his cock, making him shudder. He feels close, too close as you continuously hollow out your cheeks and suck with a vengeance again and again. He has to stop you know or he won't last long enough to fuck you. "Okay, that's enough, sweetheart," he gushes as he gently pulls himself from your mouth, "or I'm not gonna last much longer and I wanna feel all of you," he says with a wink.

He carefully lays you back down on the ground as if you're made of fine china, and removes your bikini bottoms. "Whew..." Joel whistles, staring at your pussy with look of a starved animal. "Beautiful!" His reaction to your naked cunt stirs a feeling of desperation to have him inside you right now. "Joel.... I need you, need to feel you-" "Patience darling," he soothed while teasing your moist folds. "Just gonna loosen you up a bit for me. I don't wanna hurt you." He slowly sinks two thick fingers inside you, dragging along your velvety walls. You gasp in pleasure, your hips bucking in response to the welcome intrusion. After a few moments he hooks his fingers, pressing over and over onto that sweet spot that now has you reduced to a squirming, panting mess. "So wet," Joel marvels, his voice dripping with seedy desire. Your walls start to flutter as a burst of pleasure grips you for the second time. "Oh shit, Joel," you mewl as you recover from yet another orgasm, leaving you breathless. Joel smiled, his eyes crinkling at the sides. "I know, baby. Ready for me now?" "Yes, please, just fuck me!" you beg, unashamedly. "I've got ya, gorgeous," Joel whispered. He notches the tip of his cock at your entrance, looks into your eyes and steadily and gently pushes into you, parting your velvety walls around his thickness. The beautiful sting of the stretch has you gasping and rolling your head back, overwhelmed with the sensations of pain and pleasure, both complimenting one another and setting your nerves, your cells, every part of you ablaze.

Joel can't help but grunt as he bottoms out completely. You both still for a moment, just to enjoy the feel of each other. You've never felt so deliciously full in all your life and wish it would never end. He then begins to thrust in and out, one hand gripping your hip while the other kneads hungrily at your breast. As Joel picks up the pace you feel him hitting your G spot over and over. You arch your back, wrap your arms and legs around him and spread your thighs wider, clamping your calves around his waist and digging your feet into his ass to push him as deep as possible. You just can't get enough of him! The tingling sensation returns, heat building in your belly at the blissful feeling of Joel's hard and throbbing cock hitting every part of your silky tunnel, bringing your orgasm dangerously closer by the second. Joel continues to pound into you like his life depends on it, battering your cervix. You've never experienced this level of rapture with any previous sexual partners. Joel certainly puts them to shame today. The familiar coil begins to tighten in your lower belly, causing your walls to contract harder around his length.

"Fuck," Joel gushes, sounding awed. "So tight!..... fucking.... fucking made for me sweet girl!" Joel's relentless pounding has you crying out his name as you soak his cock with you slick juices. "You're doing so good. Takin' me so good. I think you can give me one more, what ya say?" Your eyes feel heavy, chest heaving as you are still recovering from your third high. "I... can't...." you pant desperately. "Yes you can , baby." Joel's gentle coax seeps into your shaking body, making you completely compliant to his wishes. Hell, you'll do anything he wants right now. He kisses you, deep and hungry with passion while moving his fingers to your aching core. You're already to overstimulated that it takes mere seconds before you feel another orgasm building as he rubs faster and faster at your swollen bud. Your hands grip onto his shoulders, digging your nails in so deep you know you're leaving little crescent indents in his soft flesh. Something about that excites you even more, as if you're marking him as yours. You tremble, uncontrollably as a sudden surge of white hot bliss sweeps through your anatomy, your voice horse from screaming in ecstasy, you're ears ringing through yet another intoxicating peak.

You can tell Joel is close as his thrusts become sloppy. The sweet sound of your blissed out moans leaving your soft lips is music to Joel's ears. He's sure even the heavenly hosts could not sounds as enchanting as you do right now in his arms. He grabs your hand from his shoulder and lays it beside your head, interlacing his fingers with yours. He buries his face into your neck as he feels about ready to erupt. The warmth, the wetness, how you fit so perfectly around him, squeezing his pulsating erection is too much. "Where do you want me, sweetheart?" Joel asks in a low shuddering voice in your ear. "Inside please!" you implore. "I want all of you." Joel growls lewdly at the thought of laying complete claim to you by coating your insides in himself. A few more deep snaps of his hips brings his balls to tighten and throb as he bursts within you, painting your fluttering walls with thick ropes of his pearly white cum. His thrusts slowly cease as your legs fall limp from his sides. You kiss him leisurely, both groaning into each other's mouths. "That was..." Joel begins, still catching his breath, cheeks flushed red. "Wow..." You finish his sentence with a lazy smile. "Yeah," Joel chuckles as he slides out of you onto his back on the towel. You already miss the feeling of him being inside you.

He wraps an arm under your neck and around your shoulder, pulling you into his side. You lay your head on his chest and rest a hand on his soft tummy. He lovingly lays his hand on top of yours and you notice just how much his large hand dwarfs yours. Basking in the afterglow, you both just lay together, revelling in this new found intimacy between you. For so long you've wanted Joel to know exactly how you feel but the fear of rejection kept your confession at bay. Even though there were times when you suspected that he might want more than friendship, you didn't want to push the boundary and potentially ruin the close friendship you'd both built. But knowing now that he's wanted you all along in the same way you want him leaves no doubt in your mind; You're his and he's yours. You can't keep the smile off your face, knowing you've both crossed into new territory and what this means going forward. It may be a little soon and some might even call you downright foolish as your next words flow from the heart with such conviction. "Joel...." you breathed quietly. "Hmmm," he answered in a low rumble. "I love you." A moment of silence passes and an anxious knot begins to from in your stomach, fearing you've ruined this moment by coming on too strong. But before your mind can spiral any further with doubts, Joel pulls you into him even tighter, tucking you under his chin and kisses the crown of your head. He sighs contentedly and whispers "I love you too Y/N.

[zxoaii]

Want You

fem! reader x Ryomen Sukuna

Summary: After being taken in exchange for the lives of the people in her village, Y/n learns the true feelings of Sukuna

SMUT

WC: 2.8k

Wattpad: _Bolter

[ Y/n ]

It's only natural that after several months of being around someone you'd start to get comfortable with them, right? Nine months ago Sukuna came into my village and took me hostage.

I thought I'd die a quick death.

No one would have expected what's actually happened since then. I wouldn't say I'm in love, maybe he could call it something like that but I couldn't.

Still, I enjoy the moments in the morning when I wake up entangled with him. His body is so warm. He holds me so tight. My head rests atop his, one of my arms is around his neck, and the other is wrapped around his chest.

Sukuna holds my waist possessively. Even in his sleep, he's protective of me. Each hot breath on my cleavage reminds me of how close we've become.

Maybe not calling it love is just me lying to myself.

. . .

There isn't much to do around the estate. There's a library that I've looked through. It has some good books but a large portion of it is written in a language I can't understand.

The garden outside has been dead for quite some time. Even if it was alive recently, the bitter cold of the winter months would've killed it all anyway.

Sukuna goes between working out, traveling outside the estate, and working in his office.

I'd clean if his servant wasn't so opposed to it. They're opposed to me doing anything that's considered their job. Maybe they find it boring here too.

I linger outside Sukuna's office. He's heard me complain about my boredom a hundred times before. If he was going to do something about it he would've by now.

"Why are you standing out there?"

I turn to the door. There's no way he could've seen me... I start to creep away, "Don't walk away. Come in here."

"I've told you not to boss me around like you own me." Sukuna is standing in front of a large map. Another completely foreign item. I couldn't tell you where it's a map of.

"What's wrong, dear?"

"I want to go outside the estate with you. Not just within the gates."

Sukuna sets his things down on the desk and then makes his way over to me. "Why?" His soft expression is lost to the emotionless one he wore so often when we first met.

"It's boring here." I know he wouldn't hurt me. I really have nothing to be afraid of with him... But I am afraid. I'm afraid of the King of Curses, the man who stands before me right now.

"No. You're human, you're too fragile." I roll my eyes at his overused excuse. "I lived in the world just fine before you, Ryomen." The use of his first name draws a quick expression that disappears a moment later.

"You don't live in that world anymore. Now you live in my world where humans are so weak and small they are played with by even the weakest curses. The strongest human can do nothing against the most pathetic curses."

"I never had any issues with them before so why would now be any different? You said curses have always toyed with humans but why not me then?" He rolls his eyes and turns away from me.

My hand grabs his bicep, forcing him to face me again. "I'm not finished-"

"You're finished. You're not leaving those gates." He grabs my wrist and pulls my hand off of him. "Ry-"

"Don't."

"You can't trap me here! You act like you want to have some fucking fantasy romance and then keep me here like a prisoner!" I follow him around his office. It's not fair. Even the servant gets to leave.

"Oh my god. It's not a romance... I am a prisoner. You took me prisoner. That's how it always was, that's what this is. How could I be so stupid?!"

"You're not a prisoner here. I didn't take you prisoner." I've trapped him between myself and his bookshelf. He just bows his head, rubbing his face with his hands.

"Oh, I'm not a prisoner. You're a lot of things but I didn't take you for the delusional type." I scoff at him and the stupidity of his comment.

"I don't want you as a prisoner."

"Then let me leave!" His hands fall to his side, I can tell how fed up up he's getting but I want to get somewhere. I don't want to leave I just want to go outside these damned gates. Sukuna turns and for a moment I'm afraid.

His expression is desperate, pleading for me to stop.

"You can't seriously act like I'm not just a pr-"

"I don't want you as a prisoner I want you as my wife! You can't leave because I want you, because now they have something to hurt me. You are in danger because I love you and they will use that against me!"

Sukuna gives me a second to respond. When I don't he grabs my face and leans in to kiss me. I knew there were feelings there, he wanted me here for companionship.

I never expected him to tell me he loved me.

His lips aren't demanding. They're desperate. When he realizes I'm not kissing back he pulls away. No, that's not what I meant. My hand grabs his shirt in a fistful and pulls him back to me.

Sukuna grabs me by my waist and lifts me onto his hips. We can talk about going outside later. I want this more. He moans against my lips, hands roaming across my body.

A small cough pulls me away from the kiss. "Ignore them." Sukuna kisses down my neck but now I'm looking at Uraume.

"Sukuna." They call out to him. "Goddamnit Uraume, what?" Sukuna sets me down on the floor. I know he expects me to stay but Uraume already doesn't like having me around.

His shouting echoes down the hall as I hurry back to my room but then quickly stops. I guess they did have something more important to tell him.

. . .

I haven't seen Sukuna in two days. The boredom is killing me. Uraume doesn't talk to me and wouldn't tell me even if I asked.

I don't think Sukuna is even here anymore. That first night I expected to wake up to him getting in bed late. He didn't and then he didn't again last night.

It's childish to think the kiss or admission has anything to do with his disappearance... Right?

I sit in the chair in his office, looking up at the detailed ceiling. It has a mural of something. I can't see what it is though.

The sun is going to set soon. That would be a third day away. "What are you doing in here?" My head snaps to the door. Uraume stands in the doorway.

"I'm waiting for Sukuna. I assumed the first place he'd come when he got back would be here..." They sigh and shake their head. "He should be home tonight. Dinner is ready."

Even when he isn't around they're respectful. I know they really can't stand me. I think they can't stand how highly Sukuna regards me... A human.

"Thank you." They walk away without any other unnecessary conversation. Were they lying? I'll wait up and listen for him.

He's never left abruptly like this. Usually, he tells me when he's leaving and when he'll be back... He doesn't have to and I always thought it was stupid when he did.

I think I do love him.

. . .

I walk across the freezing floors barefoot. I know being quiet won't help me sneak up on either of them so I'm not sure why I did this...

Their hushed talking leads me past the kitchen. Warm flickering light seeps out into the hall from a small room. I stop walking to try and listen to their conversation.

Their words are foreign. Is this the language written in all the books? What is it? Sukuna said it was a dead language.

All I wanted was to check to see if he was back. He is. I should go back to the bed. He'll be there soon. I turn to go back the way I came.

I really should go...

My palm rests against the wall for a moment. God, I must think I'm really special to think they won't notice me. Still, I make my way over to the door. It's cracked open enough for me to peak in.

Uraume holds a rag and a bucket of water. Sukuna's back is to the door. Is that his blood? They clean the blood off of him, dip the rag back into the bucket, and repeat.

That's enough.

This time I actually start making my way back to the bedroom. My hurried footsteps are louder than I'd like which causes more rush.

As soon as I'm in the room with the door closed I exhale the breath I was holding. "What are you worried about?" My scream brings a playful smile to Sukuna's face.

"How did you-"

"Uraume said you missed me." In the dark I can only make out his shape. "You were covered in blood."

"I need to bathe, I know."

"Why- I thought they were bathing you." My heart is still pounding in my chest. A hand presses over my heart to feel it racing. "It's ok." Sukuna's finger hooks my chin, drawing my head up.

I can hardly see anything and he knows that. "Are you tired?" His touch pulls me closer to him. Sukuna places his other hand on my arm. "No."

I can make out the movement of a nod. "Good. I don't want to wait." I stand on my toes to meet his lips. "Maybe I should wash off first..." Our mouths brush against each other as he speaks. "I don't care." I close the space between us.

Our kiss is slow, completely opposite of our first kiss. My fingers roam his abdomen. His taste is intoxicating. His touch is ethereal.

One of his hands tangles into my hair. The slow kiss starts to change. Sukuna picks me up and carries me over to the bed.

Before I can reach out to kiss him again his hands grab at my nightgown. He rips it down the middle, completely exposing me to him.

His rough hands are so delicate against my bare skin. He's hesitating. Holding back. "Sukuna." I can make out his face a little better now. "Yes?"

"Don't hold back."

The words trigger something in him I haven't seen before. Sukuna attacks my neck with rough kisses. He yanks my underwear down my legs, discarding it somewhere across the room.

Calloused hands push my thighs apart. I watch as he takes his pants off. My breaths are short and quick. My desperation might actually be equal to his.

I want him.

Sukuna pulls me up. He sits down where I was lying and guides me onto his lap. My thigh brushes against his cock, causing a groan from him.

Anticipation gets the best of me. I take him in my hand and position myself over him. "Just go slow." I ignore his warning and sit down on him.

Sukuna groans out some curses. His hands grip my hips so hard it hurts. The pain is so intense I carefully lean myself forward onto his chest and don't move anymore.

My nails dig into his back desperately. "Good girl, you're so good." Sukuna kisses my neck and shoulder. Occasionally he gently bites at the skin.

His arms hold me so carefully. Gradually, the pain starts to lessen. As it does I make small movements with my hips.

"Lay down."

"What?"

Sukuna shifts me over so I'm back to laying on the mattress. I can feel the blood across my body. It should bother me.

It should bother me...

Instead, the thought slips away, replaced by the awareness of Sukuna pulling my legs around his waist. I sit up on my arms to watch him.

"You should lay down." He mounts my thighs against his hips. I lay back down, staring up at the abyss where the ceiling is.

It sounds like he might be talking but I can't make out any words. Before I get the chance to ask he thrusts back into me. Pleasure rips through me, forcing strangled moans out of me.

"Ryomen-" The pound of his hips against mine causes a dull ache already. "Don't stop, don't stop." His rhythm is sloppy and harsh. My idea of a first time was always sensual and romantic.

Somehow this is better. Ryomen's version of love is this. His body crashing into mine so desperately. Muttered words falling from his mouth.

"Harder."

"Harder?"

He pulls out abruptly to manhandle me. "Hold onto this." Ryomen turns me around and guides my hand to the headboard. "What about my fingers?"

"Don't worry about it."

His cock slides back into me effortlessly, so slick with my arousal he hardly has to use his hands. I prepare for my fingers to be crushed between the headboard but when the thrusting starts it never comes.

Skin brushes against the back of my arm, drawing my eyes up. Ryomen holds the headboard, his hands just outside of mine.

"Your-"

"Don't worry about it." His demanding tone would usually be intimidating but instead comes off painfully sexy.

My hands grip the headboard, knuckles occasionally brushing the wall.

"I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you-" The muttering finally becomes clear in my ear. I love you. Ryomen has been muttering the words 'I love you.'

Sweat builds up in my hairline. The heat of our movements is overwhelming. My legs tremble weakly below me. Despite my body wanting to give out I still want more from him.

"Are you ok?" The wild pace slows to one with more rhythm. "Yes, don't stop." My voice shakes as I force the words out.

Careful kisses are pressed on the crown of my head. "You're so good." My head is draped between my shoulders again. The pleasure is so overwhelming I might pass out.

My nails dig into the headboard to keep my body upright. They start slipping again, forcing me to adjust myself. "If you can't-"

"I'm right there, Ryomen don't stop!" I shout at him. He takes my word, fucking me harder. My moans echo through the room, probably down the hall.

Poor Uraume.

Ryomen grunts with each thrust. The work he's putting in must be exhausting. Moans turn to screams as my body starts to tense. He doesn't falter, slamming his body against mine.

I fall onto the sheets exhausted. My orgasm consumes me completely. The pleasure is so intense I cry out his name. As it comes to an end, Ryomen doesn't stop.

"Roll over for me, doll." I lazily roll onto my back. The sheets stick to my sweat-slicked skin. I wonder what's blood and what's sweat.

"Just a few more minutes, you can take it right?" He coos while spreading my thighs apart. "Yes." My head falls to the side, eyes shut.

Ryomen's finger teases my clit. "I can't-"

"You just said you could." He taunts but moves his hand away. My body twitches below him with each thrust. "Your cunt is so fucking tight."

The wild animalistic fuck has become slow and sensual. He pulls back until only the end of his tip remains in then thrusts until he can't anymore.

"You're so beautiful." His fingers lace into mine carefully. "Oh my god..." The longer he goes on the closer I feel to a second orgasm.

As his cock begins to twitch inside me his pace starts to speed up. It seems like as much as he wants it to be romantic for me he can't help but be rough.

His hand presses mine into the mattress, my legs tremble wildly, and my second orgasm forces noises out of me I didn't know I could make. Ryomen's head lolls between his shoulders. His moans bring a hot blush to my cheeks.

My hand is crushed in his for a moment as he comes and then carefully released. His body collapses next to mine on the bed.

"I love you." I whisper, staring up at the ceiling. Those nights he spent away felt like torture. Not knowing if he was okay...

"I love you too."

We lay in comfortable silence for several minutes. I could fall asleep right now. "I'm going to go draw a bath." A smile tugs at my lips. I'm beyond exhausted and covered in blood.

I guess that's normal for Ryomen Sukuna.

Sorry guys I was feeling too lazy to delete the double spaces :(

[varpusvaras]

Being away from Alderaan was always hard.

It had been hard back when the Republic had still existed, and it had only become harder after the Republic had fallen. But Bail had never complained, and he wouldn't start complaining now. He had too much to do for that.

Still, even he couldn't go on forever, with looking after his family and Alderaan, with trying to uphold some sort of sence of justice in the Imperial Senate, and with hopping from one Rebel base to another. He wasn't getting any younger, and some days he could truly feel it. Sometimes some sorrows just felt too heavy.

It had been difficult for him to concentrate on other things during the past days. His mind kept replaying the image of the destroyed city, and of the sorrow in Fox's eyes. Kamino had not been his home for many years, and had perhaps never been truly his home to begin with, but it had still meant a lot of things for him, a lot of things many people would conflate with him.

Above all else, Kamino had connected him and his brothers. The brothers, who seemed now to be truly lost to him.

Bail was increasingly glad for Breha and Leia, for his whole family, for holding each other together. The three of them were what held Bail together, after all, through all of this, when in all honesty, he just felt out of breath.

The meeting came to an end. Bail turned to look when Mon put her hand on his arm.

"You look tired", she told him. Bail hummed.

"I've heard that's what happens when you have a toddler", he said. Leia had just started to take her first steps without holding onto anything, and had started to try out words a while ago. No matter how tiring children were when they were small, Bail found that he was increasingly reluctant to seeing her grow up either, even if seeing her learn new things every day was more exiting than anything. Perhaps that was just the duality of parenthood.

Mon smiled slightly. There were new shadows under her eyes as well.

"I know that very well", she said. She gave his arm a light squeeze. "Go home. We all need you rested, your family included."

Yes. Going home sounded wonderful. Bail nodded, and was just about to tell her the same, or ask if she wanted to come visit them soon, when-

-when he could've sworn he felt something tugging at the back of his mind.

It was a strange feeling, though familiar at the same time. Many times he had felt the same when he was with Leia, her curious eyes watching him and her mind reaching out to him in a way Bail couldn't properly answer to, other than to try and aknownledge that he had felt her. There was a certain feeling to it, when a child, still unconsciously doing so, reached out, compared to when someone with years of training would do the same.

But Leia was not here. Bail stopped, and looked around. He watched his fellow Rebels, mingling around, getting ready to leave or move out elsewhere in the base that still needed establishing and work, and he listened.

There. He glanced at Mon.

"Just a moment", he said to her, before hurrying off, away from the meeting room and down the still barely lit hallways of the base, and eventually, he could hear it out loud as well.

A child crying. Bail had become extremely responsive to such a noise, lately, and he quickened his pace even more as the sound gripped at his heart.

There was a room, tucked away from the commotion of the rest of the base, furnished to look like a spare room. There was a droid there, leaning over a small bed, making a low, calm humming sound, which was almost completely drowned out by the crying.

Bail almost ran the last steps. The droid noticed him then.

"Oh, hello", it said, in a vaguely female voice. "I'm C-EER4, refurbished medical droid. I was told to look after the child for a moment."

Bail was barely listening to the droid.

There was a small baby on the bed, his little fists grabbing thin air as he cried, tiny tears rolling down his round cheeks. He was younger than Leia, clearly, by several months. Entirely too small to be left alone, even with a droid.

Bail didn't think twice. He reached down on to the bed, and lifted the baby to his arms.

The crying stopped. A pair of dark eyes turned to look at up at Bail, and Bail-

Bail knew those eyes. How could he not, when he loved them so?

"What is a clone baby doing here?" He asked the droid.

"He was brought in by a small cell a few days ago", C-EER4 said. "Some of the younger clones were succesfully shipped out from the cloning facilities before their destruction. He was, by their words, the only one of that age that survived."

Bail looked back down at the baby. He was still looking at him, tears now drying on his little face, and there was the slightest tug in Bail's mind.

It didn't take anything else for Bail to fall in love.

"I will take him", he told the droid. "His father is waiting for him at home."

C-EER4 didn't say anything to that. Bail wouldn't have listened to anything, anyway.

The only thing that mattered to him at that moment was the little gift in his arms, looking up at him, with all the trust a child could possibly have.

[tessatales]

The Sins of the Winter Soldier Chapter 1

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Notes: slow burn romance

Warnings: none really, hinted past issues with reader?

Authors note: Hey guys! If anyone has a better idea for the fic name please drop them below! Honestly pulled this title out my butt and I don’t really like it. But it’s better than ‘Bucky fic’ so at this point I can’t complain 🤷🏻‍♀️

Enjoy!

Chapter 1:

You wake up to the unnerving sound of silence.

The compound was silent.

In the year since being rescued, and the six months since you'd been moved into the avengers tower, you were pretty sure it had never been silent.

Feeling the familiar sensation of dread creeping in, you sit up, thankful for falling asleep fully clothed.

Slipping on a pair of trainers, you padded out into the empty corridors, your steps silent as you listened out for signs of life.

Biting down on the inside of your cheek as you walked, you tried your best to remember what your therapist said about dealing with panic.

"Remember Y/N, your emotions are currently directly linked to your power. Panic equals power surge"

"Good morning Y/N" Agent Peters said as she appeared from around the corner, her eyes trained on the communicator in her hands.

Relief floods your body as she approached, making you feel a little light headed.

"Morning, where is everyone?" You ask, hoping the shakiness you feel doesn't portray in your voice. Agent Peters doesn't stop, continuing on her way through the building as she speaks.

"They're all in the Pit"

The Pit?

There was only two reasons they'd all be there, and as you haven't been shipped off somewhere in the middle of the night because Hydra had found you, it will be the second option.

They've caught someone.

-------------

"Who do we have?" You ask breathlessly as you make your way to the front of the observation deck, only to be held back by several pairs of hands.

"Are you out of your mind Y/N? Who told you we were here?" Tony demanded through gritted teeth. The panic in his gaze obvious. Sensing you were about to get Agent Peters in trouble, you decided to be vague.

"Just some Shield Agent I passed in the corridor, I got scared when I couldn't find anyone so they told me you guys were down here" You reply sheepishly, hating having to admit as a grown adult that you were afraid. The remaining hands drop from where they held you, one or two squeezing you affectionately before doing so.

"Sorry kid, we didn't think about what it would be like for you to wake up and find no one, but this stuff is sensitive." Steve said, making his way to stand in front of you.

"Is it bad?" You ask, anxious to know whos down in containment.

"He wasn't when I knew him. But that was a long time ago now"

"You've caught the Winter Soldier?" You gasp. Steve nodded.

"Though I knew him as Bucky"

Gesturing for you to follow, Steve made his way towards the edge of the deck.

"It took the Big Guy removing his robotic arm to detain him. But we did it.” Tony said over his shoulder as he worked on the holograms in front of him.

“Found him in Siberia." Steve continued as he lent against the railings above the Pit. You hovered just a step away from it, scared of what you'd see when you peered over.

"Don't worry, he cant see you from here" Natasha said, coming to place her hand reassuringly on your shoulder. With a nod, you stepped forward, holding your breath as the Pit came into view.

The man you could see below didn't look like a deadly assassin. He didn't really look real. You'd seen the affects the serum had on people, you'd read every file you could on Steve and everyone else on the team since arriving at the compound. But this man looked different.

He stood motionless in the middle of the shielded cell, his body perfectly placed for any oncoming threat. He seemed to lean heavily to one side as if unsure how to balance himself without his metal arm, and even from this height you could see the angry red scars that wound around what remained of the metal appendage.

"He looks sad" You mutter, staring down a the Winters Soldiers profile.

"That's one way to look at it, I think he looks damn angry" Sam said, crossing his arms as he leaned over to take a look.

"You’re bitter because of the car thing" Tony commented, his eye never leaving the hologram before him.

"And you wouldn't be?" Sam countered, eyebrow raised in question. Tony didn’t reply.

"What are you going to do with him?" You ask no one in particular, barely managing to tear your eyes away to look at Steve when you get no response.

"Tony and Bruce are looking into the arm, making sure there's no trackers imbedded in it. While the Shield team are convinced that the longer he is away from Hydra, the more likely it will be for us to be able to deprogram him." Steve replied as he moved away from the edge.

You felt the surprise flood your body at the decision.

"They're not going to try to use him?" You half whisper. Steve shook his head but said nothing.

"Not like this.” Natasha answered for him, looking between you and Steve.

“Once upon a time, Bucky was one of us. Shield hope that if they can get him back to pre-programmed Bucky, he might offer his skills willingly." Steve said, his gaze unfocused as he looked down at his friend.

"But what if he doesn't?" You say with a frown, looking again at the man in the cell.

"If he doesn't, he'll be free to go wherever he likes. Hydra and Shield free" Steve said, a hint of a smile on his face. Although he was trying to hide it, you could hear the bittersweetness in his voice as he thought about it. Because if Bucky said no and left, he’d be leaving Steve behind.

"You'd get your best friend back" You say with a small smile, trying your best to pull him out of his melancholy thoughts as you hugged him around the middle.

"I would" Steve said with a laugh, hugging you back.

"Until that day however, we’re going to have to ask you to stay away from here." Nat said as you pulled away from Steve, turning you by the shoulders. You felt yourself pout.

"Why? Surely him being locked down there can’t affect me?" You ask with only a little annoyance evident in your voice.

"We don't know. All Hydra know about you so far is that we have you. The last thing we wanna do is broadcast your whereabouts via their deadliest asset." Natasha continued turning you to face the rest of the team. Scanning the teams faces, you could see they all felt the same.

"Here, stayed up to finish it when I found out they were bringing him here" Bruce chimed in, handing you your very on comm bracelet.

"This way you can talk to any of us whenever you need to without having to come down here." Nat said with a smile.

"Don't worry, I’ll stay away. This is the longest I’ve stayed in one place. I'm not jeopardizing that." You reply, slapping the bracelet on and looking at everyone. This was your new family. You weren't going to mess that up.

A/N: Chapter 2 can be found here

[khaotunq]

trick or treat!

HI LIZ!!! AkkAyan college for u~

This fic lies abandoned in my folder because there were too many things I couldn't decide on (like where Ayan ended up going for uni. Mostly where Ayan ended up going for uni.) but here is a snippet!

*

Ayan had sent his flight tracking number before boarding and had sent him a sleepy selfie before take off, but it had been radio silence ever since, probably because he was sleeping to try and escape the worst of the jet lag.

  The flight landing had been delayed and Akk had resorted to braiding the leaves of a plant in the lounge just to keep himself busy, so he was caught off guard when the doors slid open. He shoved up from his seat and was almost immediately bowled back into it by a warm, familiar weight. Ayan was home. He was used to these airport reunions by that point, so Akk wasn't shy about wrapping his arms around him in front of Ayan's entire flight, most of whom didn't appear to have sprinted past the gate the way Ayan must have.

  He probably felt like hours of travel, but he smelled like home. Akk pressed his face into his shoulder and squeezed, hard. Something he hadn't noticed before that moment settled somewhere behind his sternum.

  "Hi," Ayan said, content to be squished. His bag had been abandoned on the floor several feet back, but he made no move to retrieve it, apparently trying to fit himself into Akk's lap. "You smell good. I missed how you smell."

  "You're ridiculous. No suitcase?"

  He shook his head. "Got everything I need right here."

  He said it with both hands curled into the material of Akk's t-shirt. He wasn't talking about his bag. Akk smiled. "Ready to go home?"

  Ayan's expression, when Akk lifted his head, said he was thinking something cheesy so Akk kissed him gently to cut him off. He tasted faintly of toothpaste and Akk had to pull away to snicker.

  "You'd have complained if I tasted like the fact I've been dead to the world for several hours."

  "I wouldn't have. Not today." And it was true: he was so elated to just have Ayan back in his arms after months that he wouldn't have cared if Ayan had been doing wasabi shots immediately prior to arrival.

  Ayan didn't respond, but he looked pleased. He let Akk tumble him off his lap and brightened even more when Akk went to retrieve his bag and offered his hand to Ayan rather than making him carry it.

  "Tell me my mum's out of town for a week."

  Akk snorted. "She's making you lunch as we speak. We'll stay with her tonight but tomorrow I'm going back to mine, and you're welcome to join me."

  He was yanked to a halt because Ayan stopped dead and pulled him around. "I love you so much." He looked deadly serious, and if this conversation was anything other than Ayan not so subtly telling him they weren't leaving the bedroom for a week, Akk would have melted.

  Instead, he smiled and leaned down for a kiss, squeezing his hand. "I love you too. Now come on. The car's going to be unbearable."

  It was Ayan's car – he'd insisted on Akk taking over its paperwork because it would just sit and rot in a driveway otherwise, and Akk had a funny feeling Ayan would find some excuse to not officially take it back. He was going back to university after the summer and it would just be a hassle to keep changing it around, Akk thought he'd say.

  They exited the airport and were hit with a wall of heat that had Ayan whining in protest the way he did every time he forgot he was from Thailand.

  "Did you not park in the shade?"

  "Your flight was late – it was in the shade when I got here three hours ago."

  "We were only delayed by maybe 45 minutes."

  Akk just smiled at him.

  Ayan lit up. "You missed me! You got here early? I thought you were at work this morning? Did you call in sick just to wait for me at an airport? Look at you – you did!"

  "Don't be ridiculous," Akk said, letting Ayan hip check him to absolutely no effect whatsoever as they crossed to the section where Akk had parked. "I had holiday hours to use."

  He waited a moment, smiling. "I've taken the rest of the week off."

  Ayan dragged him around again and all but jumped on him. They were in the middle of the car park with the sun beating down, but Ayan's mouth was on his properly for the first time in months and there wasn't a force on earth that could have kept Akk from dropping the bag and wrapping both arms around Ayan to kiss him back properly, almost lifting him completely.

  Ayan settled back onto his feet and grinned at him, a little more flushed than the travel and sun could account for.

  "Can we stop at your place first?" He asked, a little breathless and toying with the hem of Akk's shirt. "Maybe you forgot something."

  Akk laughed and shook his head, beeping the car open and heading around to the driver's side, letting Ayan shove his own bag into the back.

  They stopped at Akk's.

  They were late to lunch.

[zephfair]

Hello? Anyone still here?

Hey, who disappeared for months and has desperately missed all her little friends who live on this hell-site but has been too exhausted and overwhelmed to actually login ... and who lost track of where this sentence was going ... Yeah, this girl.🤗

But, wow, have I missed you all and all the beauty that is Tumblr, and I hope you'll forgive me for secreting myself away since--holy cow--January.

Quick life update behind the cut.

So, I knew going back to work full-time at my age after quite a long unintended break AND now having health disabilities, well, I knew it would be hard. I knew I would have to adjust my whole, entire life. I expected it to be incredibly difficult, and I fully planned to give myself some grace and time in having to change my every routine.

But somehow, I still underestimated it.

I am so thankful to have a job now, with a steady (if small) income and benefits that frankly make me want to weep with thanks. I mean, I don't have time to go to the doctor, but at least now I could afford to go, if I could get there.

But wow, work is tough. Not just the literal work but, as I said, changing my entire life around it. I'm not complaining, but I am doing my best to learn all new skills (job is not in my old field), relearn how to work and reschedule my own needs and just upend everything.

The absolute worst thing has been trying to take care of my aunt. I was to leave town on Jan. 7 to start my training on Jan. 8.

My 90-year-old aunt fell and broke her pelvis (and a finger and needed some stitches) Jan. 2. I spent every waking hour with her over the rest of that week. While I'd planned to spend that week cleaning my house, getting my business in order and just resting, I was freaking out and traveling through the snow and literally worried sick about her.

It was bad.

And I couldn't stay with her like I did when she broke her hip because I had to attend training full-time. At least they let us come home super-early from that first on-site week of training, but that led to a literal nightmare of a drive home one night through snow, ice, rain, flooding and fog that I'm not joking I've had nightmares about before and now since. Long story.

So, I spent January and February training and working 9 hours a day then spending all day Saturday at her place cleaning and doing laundry and making sure she had everything she needed for a week, and then I had Sunday to do my own laundry and clean the house and take care of my own things...which just keep getting pushed back because I'm too worn out.

Thank God, Aunt made a miraculous recovery and now is doing her own house and laundry etc. but I still go out one day a weekend and do anything else she needs and make sure she has all her groceries and supplies and stuff.

We're all each other has.

Needless to say, I haven't been taking care of myself. I don't sleep well anyway, but add the stress of the new job and my dear aunt and my own health issues, and I'm exhausted. Weary. Overwhelmed and just so very tired. My body is so heavy, I can barely move anymore. It's bad.

And when I finally got to my doctor two weeks ago for my long-delayed check-up, found out I was right about my blood pressure being sky-high again. It went high for the first time several years ago when my Mom was dying, but it eventually settled and was fine. But yeah, it's bad again now. No shock there. And all my lovely chronic health conditions have flared which was no surprise--again, I had braced myself to expect it and power through it, and that's what I'm doing. But it sucks. And it's hard. And there's so much pain.

I don't want to say much about my job, but the over-arching Praise the Lord wonderful thing about it is working from home. There have been so many days already that I never would've been able to get to an office to work, but I can push through it here because I don't have to use any spoons to get myself "ready" (sweatshirts and leggings, no personal grooming necessary, yay), and I don't have any anxiety about driving because zero commute. It has its challenges too because Teams is a weird office communication alternative to get used to, but on the good side, I don't have to deal with interpersonal drama from co-workers.

The work itself is challenging, but I have some days where I finally feel quietly competent and think, Oh, I can actually do this. And then there are some days that leave me in tears and praying for help because it's just too hard. But there's no way I'm quitting; they're going to have to fire me because did I mention the benefits are incredible? I mean, I live in the US and if you knew how much I had to pay last year for my own health insurance, and then the scope and biopsies and then the skin cancer and surgery and then the other skin pre-cancer biopsy and treatment. Yeah, I'm still in big debt from all of that.

So I keep praying that they keep me and that I'll do a good job. And my immediate supervisor has started piling extra work on me over the past 3 weeks so suddenly I'm doing my own stuff AND cleaning up the work from co-workers who aren't keeping up. And all of them have been working since October while just a handful of us began in January?

I have been complaining about this to my aunt, and I thought it meant that my supervisor thinks I'm incapable or is punishing me for trying to get through own my entire workload every single day. But she believes he's giving me all their shit work because I'll actually do it, and I admit, I have gotten some of it completed successfully after they'd given up on it. So, I don't know.

I know that I'm a perfectionist and I've always pushed myself as hard as possible to do my best at work (not at housework and other things in my life lols) but I really hope that it gets me a good reputation at this job and they keep me.

So yeah, that's what's going on here. I've completely abandoned the fandom things in life that I actually enjoy. I almost feel, like, guilty when I'd think about trying to make some time to browse Tumblr or wasting time on social media or even trying to write fic. I get done with work at 6:30 pm, and until I get something to eat and then clean up, it's 8 or 8:30. I have to spend about an hour on the phone with Aunt (and I call her every morning, break, and lunch time too). By then, I can barely walk or move so I just try to make it upstairs to bed. Even though I can't sleep, it just feels nice to lie down.

But I miss all of you. And I miss fandom fun. And I want to be around more because maybe it would recharge me rather than me feeling so freaking overwhelmed every minute of the day.

And I promise not to complain and bitch all the time, now that I've gotten it out of my system. But thanks for listening.

I do miss you, and I love you all.

PLEASE let me know if I've missed anything important in your lives and goings on here! I've got A LOT of catching up to do!

[trappedinthewalls]

So yesterday that Annie person from the P&Z circle @pleasetiemyshoelaces talked about a couple of times decided to have an absolute conniption over a post I made x number of months ago speculating over Poppy's behavior. She reblogged every reblog acting like they were made at different times, like this was an ongoing thing I'd been talking about repeatedly, and not that I'd reblogged it all in one day cause I was too lazy to edit the first post.

She called me a men's rights activist and had a "history of r#pe apologia" because I posted about this exactly once, because I believe @noehflake , and because I called Poppy a bitch. Mhmm yeah. Okay. Totally not coping over the fact that she's too much of a coward to actually confront any of the people who actually talk about this stuff on a regular basis. Annie, sweetie, this is a vent blog. This is not a critical blog. I don't have any kind of platform. There is no mission here. I'm not trying to take anyone down or harass anyone. This is where I occasionally come to complain. That's it.

For the people in the back. Noehflake is not a r#pist. Here's what happened according to the (actual) evidence (read the Poppyamory documents and the Luxander video on it for the receipts and watch the Victor Burns interview for Noeh's side of it. We already know Poppy's side cause she hasn't shut up about it): Noehflake broke up with Poppy for being a terrible partner. Poppy harassed her and badgered her and complained on Twitter about it. Zena gaslit and badgered and manipulated Noehflake into letting the trip they'd been planning on happen anyway and Poppy asked Noehflake to pretend like they weren't broken up. They met at the hotel and had sex because Poppy wanted to and Noehflake wanted to make her happy (that's a thing that ace people do, believe it or not). Then the next morning Noehflake decided she still didn't want to continue the relationship, in no small part because Poppy and Zena were screaming at each other, so she wanted to leave. Poppy tried to physically prevent her from leaving (which is a crime, by the way) and asked if Noehflake had just had sex with her to "test to see if she loved her" (which is absolutely nuts to think). Noehflake was tired of this bullshit and said yes just to get Poppy to get the hell out of the way, and Poppy was shocked enough to let her go (seriously, if someone were barring you from leaving, wouldn't you say anything to get them to let you go?). Then when Poppy kept badgering Noehflake to get back together, Noehflake admitted to lying about using the sex as a test and in truth had agreed to the sex because of feeling conflicted and wanting to make Poppy happy. Poppy took the single part of the lie and ran with it, deciding to paint Noehflake as a r#pist because she just couldn't let it go that she got dumped.

She also kept messaging Noehflake after this, and tried to friend her on Facebook.

Having sex with your ex to make them happy and then deciding not to continue the relationship is not r#pe. If anything, it's a pity fuck. And Poppy is too much of an egomaniac to accept the fact she was given a pity fuck and then re-dumped. That's what the evidence says.

I believe Noehflake's story because it has stayed consistent this entire time. Poppy's story has changed several times rapidly. And we have receipts.

I complain because this is all a bunch of soap opera bullshit and I wouldn't care if it wasn't being perpetuated people with a platform and influence over vulnerable people. If this were being done by a politician or non-internet celebrity I'm pretty sure people would be just as interested at seeing it put to an end. I'm certainly not going to do it. Other people have decided to do that. But I will complain about it. I'm allowed to. But only sometimes.

So go whine about it to someone who actually matters in this fight. You won't get anywhere whining about me, cause I don't matter. I'm a little nobody. And that's how I like it.

[josefavomjaaga]

Andoche Junot to Laure Junot, 13 October 1812 (II)

Sorry for taking so long with the next translation. This is the second (and last, I think) letter from Junot to Laure, intercepted by the Russians, his reply to her letter that I translated here. But just so it’s mentioned, before this one, the volume also cites a letter from Junot to his secretary Cissout, lecturing the poor guy on having sent him the wrong silk stockings and having bought eau de Cologne from the wrong manufacturer. Before giving him instructions on how to distribute the letters to the ladies, that is. This second letter was to be given to Laure only some time after the first.

Junot, Duke of Abrantès, to Duchess Laure d’Abrantès, rue des Champs-Elysées, Paris Mojaisk, 13 October 1812, 6 P.M. I had written to you this morning, my dear Laure, in order to complain about you not writing to me, and I told you that I was eagerly awaiting the letters that would scold me. I've just been given this one, which I'll send back to you after I've taken a copy, because it's quite curious. The first page pleased me (to the word: pity, which is not noble), but when I saw that I was a fool, all the more guilty because I was the master of recovering my reason, and that I was a sick man who did not want to take medicine, I said to myself: "My Laure still has her head full of recipes from Aix and is a little out of sorts to tell me that it was not to me that she promised her esteem with all her friendship as the price of the noble efforts I would make to deserve the name of man, by stifling an unhappy feeling. This poor Laure adds that she has been saying this to me for many months. To this I exclaimed: "But it was eight months ago the day before yesterday that I last heard you speak!" Perhaps it's in her letters that she wants to tell me, I reread thirty-nine of them straight away, which are still there in front of me, and I didn't see any of that. As I don't have the drafts of my letters, I couldn't remember if I had asked you for medicine for my wound, and really if you sent me some balm, I wouldn't know where to put it. I do have a few scars, and I'd be very happy if you could erase them if, by making me more beautiful, it would add more charm to our friendship. Until then, the only thing that had gone wrong with the rather disjointed letter was the misquotes. But the general confession brought me back and I saw clearly that a woman who so openly accuses herself to her husband has made up her mind and from now on will have nothing to reproach herself for. Go on, my Laure, don't give rise to feelings that you can't share, and even less to those that you feel ready to share; the others are all right, but those void, I don't want. How much I would have shared your happiness, if your letter had actually found me between my mother and my son. Alas, this first happiness has long since been taken from me, and when will the other come? Will it be without bitterness? I thank you for not having made the trip to Geneva that I would have disapproved of; you didn't tell me about it, but that's all right. No doubt the happiness and glory of your life now lie in your children, and by allowing me to keep my unhappy feelings for you, by sharing them a little and giving me your esteem and all your friendship, you would not be deprived of any happy future, but we should only say these things to each other.

I think, my good friend, that this letter you expected from me is good and reasonable, but I beg you not to press me to change my feelings.I assure you that you would lose out, and allow me to use the word constancy to express the sweetness of this feeling. It is always better to fear a little than to give oneself without reserve to such a sincere friendship, which always ends up not being all that severe. As far as I am concerned, I guarantee you that no matter what you do, you will never take away from me the hope that one day my friendship will be stronger than yours and that I will be able to drag it along in spite of it; so, if you want to believe me, keep your fears, they are necessary. The report on your health is what I disliked most about your letter, because it tells me that you are still suffering. Farewell, my Laure, write to me often, but more directly than that. P.S. - Send me my last letter, which made you feel such pity, I'll burn it.

As to the »Write more directly!« - I share the feeling, your Excellency 😁. And it applies to you, too.

But mostly I’m struck by Laure Junot apparently really writing about her husband being close to his long-dead mother.

I’ve tried to look into the personal situation of Laure and her Andoche a bit but I feel I would need to read all the 14+ volumes in order to understand. So I’ll just leave it to @snowv88 or other people in the know to hopefully shed some light on it all. Is Junot deliberately misunderstanding some of what Laure had written?

If it is of interest, I can also translate the letter to Laure’s friend Madame Caroline "Calo" Lallemand, who was instructed to write to Junot about how Laure reacted to this letter.

[deusvervewrites]

Congratulations.

I gave you the benefit of the doubt and you spit on it.

If you'd posted those ideas several asks ago, that would be one thing, but to do it here while freely admitting that you wanted me to do all of the work is not only insulting, it's downright entitled.

And then you have the audacity to condescend to me. Fuck you.

but if this is the thing that is beyond your ability to imagine, that’s fine. I can spell it out for you.

I am blocking you for this. Frankly I don't even have to respond to this. But I'm going to run down your list of points anyway.

You keep pointing out that this is a permanent black mark on the student records. What about the other side of the coin? Where the hero industry is incredibly dangerous and quirks can be highly lethal? You know, the very thing that the USJ lesson was supposed to be highlighting according to Thirteen before the LoV attacked?

This is the point I am making. Expelling them won't teach them anything about Quirk use. Teaching them how to use their Quirks safely, teaching them how to survive, that's Aizawa's job. Expelling them instead of teaching them isn't protecting them, it's shirking his duties as an educator.

These kids have potentially lethal abilities and training and are going to be going into a profession that will threaten life and limb on a regular basis. I myself would sooner put a permanent black mark on a student’s record than risk them being one more corpse on the streets or getting others, like a classmate, killed.

Yeah. Funny how they're supposed to have three whole years of training before graduation. The thing Aizawa is supposed to be doing for them. Again, expulsion is a failure of him as an educator to fucking teach them.

Honestly, for as expulsion-happy as Aizawa is supposed to be, there are spots where I honestly think he isn’t expulsion-happy enough. Such as Katsuki in the battle trial. He should have booted him that same day or at least the next morning and we all would have cheered him for it.

He couldn't have done that because it was a retcon. Bakugou being expelled would remove him completely from the narrative. There was no 'move to Gen Ed' yet. So no expulsion.

think a lot of Aizawa hate comes from the fact that he is seen as an obstacle for our favorite protagonist, Izuku. I agree that Aizawa should have done more to help Izuku overcome his self-destructive issues, but he isn’t wrong that a kid so self-destructive that he cripples himself with each use of his quirk is a bad fit for heroics. A conclusion that Izuku proves right by wrecking his arms past the point that Recovery Girl can heal them. Aizawa isn’t right about Izuku, but he’s not necessarily wrong either and Izuku pays the price for not learning that lesson soon enough.

Gran Torino taught Midoriya Full Cowling in two days. Two. Days. Aizawa had Midoriya for about a month and taught him jack fucking shit. You want to complain that Midoriya doesn't know how to use his Quirk? Ask yourself who was teaching him. Or who wasn't.

The main issue with Aizawa as a teacher isn’t just the threat of expulsion, it’s the fact that he’s very hands-off in his sink-or-swim style. There’s a lesson to be had in his expulsion threats, but he just isn’t involved enough in canon to make it viable. Most writers lean into tired hands-off Aizawa and drop the expulsion aspect to make him palatable. However, to fully explore the expulsion-as-teaching method, we have to make Aizawa more involved with his students.

FINALLY! FUCKING FINALLY! This is the argument I have been waiting for you to make for several asks when you have instead insisted on repeating "No no his expulsions are totally good I promise" without elaboration.

And then you fucked it up anyway!

Let's take a look at how.

The Quirk counselors thing is fine; Aoyama and Kaminari need it to but that's not a complaint with your bullet point, only an elaboration.

Expulsion Threat. Even as a bluff it's a fuckton of pressure that's more likely to ruin their performances from stress than encourage them. The fact that it is a bluff only undermines their trust in him.

Aizawa canonically decried guidance counseling specifically, but this isn't canon so I can live with that. Threatening them with Expulsion to go to therapy however isn't going to encourage them to seek help, but to Appear Fine And Healthy so they don't get expelled. Once again undermining his own goals.

Threatening to expel Midoriya with advanced warning here while listing why is fine, if we ignore the whole 'learned Full Cowling in two days with someone who tried' thing. Gran wasn't exactly a hands-on teacher either.

Bakugou being yeeted to Gen Ed is fine, as well as the research paper. I'm mildly annoyed by him making everyone else do it, but I'll let it slide since it's on a much smaller scale.

And here it is. The biggest fuckup of the whole thing, the thing I explicitly told you multiple times was a colossally stupid, cruel, and horrible move, and you brought it back anyway. Threatening to expel Uraraka to motivate Midoriya. Now Midoriya has seen him expel Bakugou so he knows beyond a shadow of a doubt that this isn't a bluff and Aizawa means it. Congratulations! MIDORIYA WILL NEVER TRUST AIZAWA WITH HIS WELL BEING EVER AGAIN. The moment it looks like he's hurt, he'll think Aizawa will expel Uraraka for his failures! He will start hiding shit from Aizawa if it means protecting her! WHAT IF HE FUCKING DROPS OUT TO PROTECT HER? Even as a bluff, this is pointlessly cruel and achieves nothing. No, less than nothing. This has actively set Midoriya back. Or did you forget about Midoriya's massive fucking trust issues you're insisting on exacerbating?

This still overlooks that it is not his job to deem they have no potential. It is his job to teach them so they can achieve their potential.

Quoting Hero injuries and deaths sounds like a great way to boost morale and keep the students enrolled and trusting him with their well being and not hiding injuries or exhaustion from him for fear of being expelled at the slightest fucking papercut.

I know you like quoting canon at me, but the point of fanfiction is to go beyond canon. To fill in the gaps that the original creators left. If on this point you honestly can’t look past canon to see potential, then I genuinely have nothing more to say on the subject. Thank you for taking the time to debate me.

How ironic. You're arguing that it's totally fine for Aizawa to be unable to look past his own biases to see the students' potential, and yet insulting me for not rewriting Aizawa's personality into something it's not because that's his 'potential'.

But also you're wrong here. Objectively wrong. That's not what fanfiction is about at all. There is so much more to fanfiction than that. How many fics are there to see two characters kiss? That's not filling in the gaps or triyng to surpass canon. How many fix-its were caused not by gaps or 'going beyond' but frustration with the story? The characters? What about Reader-Insert or Author-Insert? Crossovers?

The idea that it is only ever written as a way to 'fill in the gaps' or to 'go beyond canon' is not only an insult to myself, but to pretty much the entire fanfiction community.

"If I can't look past canon" Do you know who I am? Genuinely? No, because I'm an anonymous internet person, but as a writer do you know who I am? Haigha and WIMTBAH are fics of mine that make Aizawa a more competent educator. Funny, that. All of my fics feature wild divergence from canon. Finding ways to take a small change and ripple it throughout all of canon is kind of my whole thing.

But you're right about one thing: I do like quoting canon. Since you seem to believe that Aizawa really isn't all that expulsion happy, here's another excerpt from Chapter 5.

On 254 being a retcon for Aizawa’s expulsion tactics: I’m not so sure. I think the intention was always to go that way, but the writing was never able to focus enough on class life to the point that it could be established and built upon as we just jumped from crisis to crisis. I agree that the practice as shown is detrimental, but I disagree on the idea that it is completely devoid of potential. To me, that is as shortsighted as declaring certain quirks inherently villainous.

what.

I--

sorry hold on let me see if I can understand this.

You're suggesting that me saying Aizawa placing a permanent black mark and traumatizing his students for no benefit is bad, is the same as me declaring that a Quirk is inherently Villainous.

Not only is that one of the single dumbest takes I have ever had the displeasure of reading with my own eyes, you're also leveling personal insults at me. What the fuck. Why-- are you okay? WHat the fuck.

Honestly I've blocked people for less. I could easily justify deleting this ask, blocking you, and going about the rest of my life a happier person. But I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt. Don't waste it.

So let's ignore your strong implication that I'm discriminating against poor little aizawa who just wants to cause unrelenting and incredible stress to his students for again, no benefit, and focus on the actual meat of your argument here.

Are you aware that in Japan, High School is not compulsory? From the perspective of his students, Aizawa is not only threatening their time at UA, but any high school at all. That Black Mark is still on the records of the students he expelled! I'm not making that up! I'm not exaggerating!

He never indicates that he transfers them to Gen-Ed for 250 chapters. We have no reason to believe that he transfers them to Gen-Ed before this. Even if it was hypothetically planned from the start instead of something to retroactively make him look like he isn't ruining he futures of these students by throwing them out of the top school in Japan with a Black Mark damn-near ensuring that none of them are ever accepted into a High School, it's still a shitty retcon because there's no foreshadowing! There is no reason to believe otherwise! Hell, we're given every reason to believe him at face value!

If Aizawa really did renroll them, then it should've been listed there in the records All Might read, or Aizawa should've said something about it. The line about ending half-assed dreams is practically confirmation that they are kicked out of UA. There is no reason to say that if he intends on renrolling them.

Unless, of course, it was a retcon thrown in later.

Funny how when Shinsou talks about the possibility of taking someone's place in 1-A and them being move to Gen-Ed, he calls it a Transfer and not fucking Expulsion.

And we are now something like five asks deep in this chain of your insistence that Aizawa's expulsion do in fact have some level of value, but you've yet to identify a single case where they would be useful except when Bakugou knowingly and deliberately used lethal force against Midoriya. Congrats. The burden of proof is on you and all you can do is repeat the same line but slightly louder. That's not even Aizawa's expulsion scare tactics, that's how literally any school would function in the real world!

You want to convince me that Aizawa's expulsion threats have value? That's your fucking job to prove! Give me a decent example! What the fuck makes you think it's okay to tell me to convince myself and insult me for not doing so?!

[eddiemunson-fanfic]

Step brother adores you pt. 3

Eddie Munson x Plus Size!Reader

Warnings: mentions of drinking, oral (f recieving), p in v

Summary: After the one night stand you had with Eddie weeks ago, you could barely think about anything else. You thought about him when you went to work. You thought about him when you were making dinner. You thought about him when you were reading your books. You thought about him at any time possible, and craved him so bad. Your dad had other plans tho.

Part 1, Part 2, Part 4, Part 5(coming soon)

It's been weeks since you saw Eddie. It's been weeks since you had him laying in your bed. You missed him, and you hated yourself for it. You didn't feel like it was right of you to miss him like you did, but you couldn't help it. You did, and that was a fact you had to live with. You still didn't feel like it was right of you to crave him like you did either, but you did.

Your dad went on several dates with his mom, and you wished that every time your dad was going on a date, Eddie would show up and "babysit" you again, but he didn't. You really hoped that any time you were left alone at home, that Eddie would show up after they left, or show up with his mom as he did the first date your dad was going on.

But he never did walk in that door before or after they went. And you could feel yourself getting frustrated and angry at the thought. You craved this man like never before, and you could barely control your feelings towards him. You knew that if shit esculated towards your dad and his mom, that it would be wrong of you to date anyway. You needed to get over your crush, and quick.

It was a thursday afternoon, and you were at work, trying to find something a costumer asked you to find. You had told her up to several times that if it wasn't on the shelf, you didn't have anything left. But she didn't wanna listen. She insisted for you to go in the back and look for it. You knew you didn't have the item in anyways, because this was like the 5th person to come in that day asking for it.

You stood in the back, looking at your nails as you thought about Eddie for the 100th time that day. Oh, this man had corrupted your brain so bad. Not that you were complaining of course.

"Hey bitch!" the familiar voice of your bestfriend exclaimed, and you jumped to turn to where her voice came from. She came running into your arms, and you grinned from ear to ear.

You embraced her and squealed, jumping up and down in place with her. Oh, it's been long since you last saw eachother, since she is busy with her own job and life. You think it might have been like 2 months or so since you last saw her, and the thought made you cry. You didn't understand how much you've missed her until this moment.

"What are you doing here?" you asked, pulling her at arms length, and she grinned back at you. She laughs at you, and pulls out something from her pocket which looked like tickets of some sort. "I got a surpriiiise" she sing-songed, playfully shoving the tickets in your face.

You grabbed one and looked at it. Hm, a band you've never heard of is playing out of town on saturday, and you raised an eyebrow and looked at her.

"I got us tickets to this so-called amazing band, they're originally from here!" she smiled at you, and you looked down at the tickets again.

"And?" you asked, laughing at her excitment. "Sounds like a daft band to be honest, who calls themself Corroded Coffin?" you snorted at the name, and she huffed and rolled her eyes at you.

"Stop being so judgy! I've heard the band members are pretty sexy" she winked at you, and you snorted. "Oh, you and boys" you rolled your eyes at her, and she swatted at your arm playfully.

"Please, please say you'll go with me!" she practically begged, and you raised an eyebrow at her. Hm, you guess a concert would probably do you good. You needed the distraction, and since both you and your bestfriend is over 21, you can take a drink while you're at this down town bar.

"Fine, I'll go" you surrendered, and she squealed, jumping into your arms. "Yay!" she exclaimed, and you had to laugh again. You had missed this. You had missed her.

"Come to my place early saturday, and we'll get ready together" you smiled at her, and she nodded. "Can your dad drive us?" she asked with a grin, and you shook your head in laughter.

"I'll ask him" you said, and she squealed one last time, hugging you tight before she turned to leave.

"I'll be there around 2pm!"

"Eep, I can't wait!" she exclaimed before she clapped her hands and walked out of the back.

You chose to stand there for a bit, before walking back out to the costumer. She was fuming when you returned, and said it was the worst costumer service she's ever experienced, and that you took your sweet time to look for something that should be easy to find as if she knows how the back of the store looks like.

You rolled your eyes in annoyance, casually enough for her to not notice, and gave your best smile to her. "I'm sorry m'am, but as I said, we don't have that in just now, but if you come by.."

"Don't even think I'll ever return to this shitty as store again!" she said as she stormed off with her belongings, slamming up the door as she huffed and looked back at you, glaring at you and walked away.

You had to stiffle your laugh as she almost tripped in her own feet when she was able to get out of the store.

The rest of the day was rather uneventful, it was slow, and you had alot of bitchy costumers come by. You were so happy you were almost done with your work week, and could relax on saturday with your bestfriend.

You went home, and your dad was waiting for you to arrive so you could eat dinner together. You sat down on the opposite side of him, and ate the dinner he had cooked for you.

You mostly sat in silence, but spoke up in unison.

"I have a date with Haley on Saturday"

"I'm going with Becca to a concert on Saturday"

You looked at eachother in a bit of a shock, before you burst out laughing.

"You first" your dad says after he stops laughing, and you look at him, and nod.

"Becca invited me to a concert the next town over on saturday, and I wondered if you could drive us?" you asked, and gave him a sheepishly smile. He looked at you and blinked for a few seconds, and smiled suddenly.

"Of course I can drive you! Is it okay if Haley joins? We're meant to go out anyways" you shrugged your shoulders and nodded.

"I guess that was what you were gonna tell me?" you ask him, and he chuckles out a yes.

You laugh, and nod, diving into your food again.

You called Becca later that night to tell her that you had a ride to the concert, and that your dad offered to pick you up again, but you told her you said you would call him if you needed him to.

She got excited, and you started planning on what to wear to the concert. You've been to concerts before together, and every time you went together, you always liked to match eachother. That was the plan now too.

By friday afternoon you were excited to get home and just be you. Your dad had told you that he was gonna be out the entire evening, and you didn't have to worry if he didn't come home by midnight.

You locked the door, and went to go read some book, and maybe smoke some weed as you were now alone and could do what you pleased. You couldn't wait for tomorrow as you looked at the outfit you were gonna wear tomorrow.

You picked out a red and black striped mini skirt, with a red lace-almost like bra, with some fishnet as a top over the bra fishnet leggings under the skirt, and some thick 5 inch pumps with spikes on them. Becca chose just the same outfit, since you've worn it together at a concert before.

You patted yourself mentally on your shoulder, telling yourself you did a good job.

"This is gonna be sick" you said into the phone with Becca, and she chuckled. "Of course it's gonna be!" she exclaimed. '

You spoke for quite some time, and when you looked at the watch on the bedside table before you laid your head down on your pillow, it showed 1:54am.

You woke up in a haze, barely remembering that you fell asleep, looking around you in confusion. You looked at the clock on your bedside table, and huffed.

Only 6:30. You could still sleep a few hours, but you felt wide awake once you opened your eyes completely.

You tossed and turned a bit, and gave up after a while. You stood up from your bed when the time was 6:55, and dragged your ass to the bathroom across the hall from your bedroom.

You looked at yourself in the mirror as you leaned against the sink to brush your teeth. You looked awful, and you cursed yourself for falling asleep with makeup on.

You groaned as you reached in the cabinet for some makeup remover after you had finished brushing your teeth.

You started the shower as you removed your makeup, and undressed, stepping into the shower and shave your entire body and make yourself ready for the night.

After your shower, and you decided to just step into your pajamas, you walked down to your dad's bedroom, and knocked, wondering if he wanted a cup of coffee on the bed or something. You always did something like that for eachother if the other was still in bed when the other woke up. He made you breakfast or gave you a cup of coffee to wake you up, and you did the same for him.

You knocked, but no one answered.

Hm, this was strange. You knocked again, but still no answer.

"I'm coming in!" you announced before you opened the door, holding a hand in front of your eyes to give him some privacy if he was naked or whatever.

"You want some coffee?" you asked, but you couldn't hear any breathing or snoring from the bed, so you glimced slightly between your fingers, noticing his bed was still made, and it didn't seem like he had been in bed at all.

Your eyebrows knit together in confusion. Where could he be?

You walked out to the kitchen, and looked around. No sign after your dad at all. Did he even come home last night? You decided to walk to the phone in the livingroom who had a voicemail, and you noticed there was a message on it. You tapped the small button, and it came to life.

"Hey sweetie, I'm sorry if I scared you or whatever if you're already asleep when you get this, but I'm not coming home tonight, but I promise I will be there in time to drive you and Becca! Stay safe, and love you much!" your dad's voice said before he hung up.

Oh, okay, he never came home then. You shrugged it off, and walked into the kitchen again to brew yourself some coffee to wake up.

"My sweet nectar, I need you" you huffed as you pressed the button who made the coffee machine come to life as it brewed your coffee, the smell of freshly brewed coffee filling your nostrils.

When your coffee was done brewing, you filled a cup, and walked outside with your book and sat down in the chair on your porch, taking in the small sunlight that was beaming through a cloud as you sipped on your coffee.

Your cute neighbor was outside to pick up her morning paper. You returned the small smile she gave you, and nodded with your coffeecup.

"Good morning, Mrs. Alden!" you exclaimed to her, and she nodded your way.

"Beautiful morning to you, Y/L/N!" she smiled as she waved at you before she turned and walked back into her house.

You have no idea how long you sat on your porch, just reading your book and sipping coffee from time to time, smoking some cigarettes here and there too, but you noticed it's been some time when your dad pulled up into the driveway. You lift your head from your book, smiling at your dad as he stops the car and walks up the driveway towards you.

"Hey sweetie, sorry if I scared you or something, but I drank a bit too much last night, and.."

"Dad, I'm not your parent, you don't have to be scared that I'll scold you or something" you chuckle at him, and he grabs his neck in a nervous manner.

"Heh, I guess you're right, sorry" he says, as he walks up to you and places his cheek on yours to give you a soft hug before he sits down beside you on the other chair.

"You ready for later?" he asks you after some silence, and you look at him, and nod.

"Yeah, I'm excited, it's been a while since we went to a concert together!" you smile, and he smiles back at you.

"You deserve to have some fun, you work so much!" he smiles, and you nod. You definitely work more than you probably should, but when you're saving up for your own place, one do what one got to do to survive.

"What band are you seeing?" he asks, and you squint your eyes as to focus on what Becca told you last night about the show and what the ticket was saying.

"Uhm, a band I think was called Coffin, something" you say, as you scratch every braincell you got to remember the name of the band.

"Corroded Coffin!" you exclaim, and he nods, shaking his head. "Never heard of" he says, as he scratches his beard. "When will Becca be here?" he asks. "Around 2, we'll get ready together" you smile at him as he chuckles. "What?" you softly laugh at him, and he shrugs.

"Just like old times, huh?" he smiles, and you nod. "Just like old times" you grin at him, and he chuckles.

"Well, I'm hungry, and I need some coffee, you want more?" he asks as he points to your now empty cup.

"Oh, yes please!" you smile, as you hand him your cup.

You use almost all morning on the porch, sitting with your dad, talking about what he did last night, and you can see he's happy. Your heart melts watching how he speaks about Haley, and how much fun she is to be around. She brings out the best in him, and it warms your heart so much.

You turn your head when you hear Bella's car honking, and you grin from ear to ear. You jump up from your seat, and almost run her over when she parks her car and walks up to you.

"Hey bestiee!" she exclaimes as she laughs at you, holding you close. "Ready for tonight, huh?" she says as you pull away from the hug and smile at her.

"I've been ready all since the phonecall last night, babyy" you grin, and she laughs.

"Hi, Becca sweetie!" your dad calls from the porch, and Becca greets him back.

"Hi Mr. Y/L/N! It's good to see you!" she smiles, as she walks to the trunk of her car to get the bag with her clothes in.

"Can I borrow your shower? Been at work, and haven't had the opportunity to shower just yet" she groans as you chuckle.

"Of course, you know the way" you say as you motion for her to walk past you. You smack her ass a bit, as it was a thing you always did with eachother just because, and she squeals but scolds you with her finger before she grins.

After Becca had showered, you were sitting in your room, helping eachother do eachothers make up, talking about whatever was gonna happen that night.

"So, your dad gonna drive us, right?" you nod as you help her with eyeliner. She always liked how you did yours, and she wasn't that skilled, but you didn't mind, you loved helping her. So you did when she asked you.

"Mhm" you hummed, and she nodded. "Hey, don't move, or it'll be wonky!" you glare at her, and she gives you "I'm sorry"-smile. You huff, as you wipe away the line that got wonky, and tries again.

"Perfect" you say, as you put down the eyeliner, and admire the work you've done. She smiles at you, and jumps off the bed to look in the mirror on your wall. She admires the work, and hums. "Absolutely perfect" she turns towards you as she grins.

You walk over to the mirror to fix your own make up as she starts to put on her clothes for the night.

She flops down on your bed to reach for your cigarette pack, lighting one as she takes a drag and walks over to you. You open your mouth for her to put it between your lips. You take a drag as she pulls it out of your mouth again to take a drag herself.

"This is gonna be so damn cool!" she exclaims as she plops down on your bed, moving so she's looking directly at you where you bend over to get a closer look at your make up.

"Damn girl, that ass fat" she says as she wolf whistles at you.

You shake your head laughing as you walk over to your bed and kneels in front of her, and takes the cigarette she has in her hands.

"You're stupid" you laugh as you lay your head down on your bed, looking at her.

She lays her head down with you, and gives your nose a smooch, making you crinkle your nose.

"I love you" she smiles, and you give her a smile back. "I love you too"

"You ready girls?" your dad asks as he knocks on your door.

"Yeah, we'll be down in 3!" you say back to him, and you hear his footsteps walking down the stairs.

"Let's fucking goo!" Becca exclaims as she jumps up from your bed and runs down your stairs as you follow suit.

"You can stop at that gas station, and we'll walk the rest" you tell your dad as you almost arrive at the venue. You could see the venue from the gas station, and you needed to buy some more cigarettes anyway.

"You sure?" your dad asked as his car stopped in front of a pump, and you jumped out of the car. "Yes, absolutely" you said as you smiled at him. "If I need to get picked up, I'll call you from there" you say, as you point to a phonebooth, and he nods.

"Have fun darling!" he says, and drives off. You and Becca link arms as you walk into the gas station to buy a pack of cigarettes.

As you link arms against as you lean into eachother as you walk to the venue, you see a familiar van pull up to the venue. What was he doing here? You stopped dead in your tracks, and Becca got pulled back since you didn't follow suit with her anymore.

"What?" she asked you, and you motioned your eyes so she could look who was walking out of his van with a Corroded Coffin merch-tshirt.

"He's a fan, so what?" she asks, and you glare at her.

"It's Eddie" you say through gritted teeth, and she gapes. "NO SHIT?!" she exclaims as she takes another glance at him. "You told me he was handsome, but not that handsome!" she says as she pulls you towards her, as she pulls you with her, walking over to Eddie. "Becca, no!" you whisper to her, but she ignores you.

"Eddie!" Becca yells, getting his attention. You wanted the ground to swallow you whole. Fuck.

Eddie turned, looking at Becca in confusion before he saw you getting dragged with her. His eyes opened up with a huge grin.

"Y/N! You're here?" he asks, and walks closer to you as he closes his side door on his van as he picks up a guitar-case with probably a guitar in it. You gulp. You didn't know you've missed him this much. Your entire body ached to jump into his arms, but your conciousness told you to do better. You straightened your back, and pulled Becca into your side again, smiling at him.

"Hi Eddie, yeah, we're here for a concert with Corroded Coffin" you point to his t shirt. "A fan?" you ask, trying to keep it light. He chuckles as he looks down at his shirt. "Yeah, something like that" he winks at you.

He turns to Becca and bows. "I'm Eddie, and you are?" he says as he stands upright again, grinning at Becca. Becca turns to give you a "he hella cute"-look, and you send her a glare back telling her you know.

"I am Becca, Y/N's bestfriend" she gives him her most charming smile. He nods at her, before he turns his attention to you again.

"See you inside?" he winks at you, and you swear you could combust right there and then. Fuck, he made you so weak in your knees. If it wasn't for Becca's support, you'd probably faint.

"Ye-yeah" you concur to say, your voice betraying you as you spoke. He chuckles as he bows to you both before he walks away into the venue.

You squeal as you watch him walk away as Becca turns her head towards you, completely in shock too.

"He is your soon-to-be step brother if your dad keeps it up, and he's that good looking? Oh boy, you're in for a ride!" she laughs at your expense. You glare at her. "Shut it" you swat at her arm as she laughs.

You lirk out your pack of cigarette needing one badly after that encounter. What were you thinking? That Eddie Munson, the most metal guy you've ever known, would not show up to a metal concert next town over AND be a fan of the headliner? Stupid. Of course he'd show up.

When you were inside the venue, it was filled almost to the brim with sweaty disgusting drunks who meant they owned the place apparently. You walked close to Becca, never letting her hand go as you snaked your way towards the bar-area and got yourself some drinks before you headed to the front of the stage where the band were gonna perform.

You looked around for Eddie, but couldn't see him.

Strange, he should've been here.

You jump out of your skin when you suddenly hear a few girls scream behind you, and you turn around to look what caused the screams.

There he was. His curly brown hair and his laugh was not something you'd forget that easy.

"Easy girls, it's enough of me for all" he laughs at them, and then his eyes locks with yours as he looks around the small venue.

He winks at you, and mouths "i'm only yours", and if it wasn't for Becca holding onto you, you would've passed out right there.

You turned so you were facing Becca again, and the smile she had on her face was enough to make you relax. She was pumped for this, and so were you.

The venue went dark, people were shanting, screaming and squealing all at once, and you could hear some shuffling from behind the stage as someone spoke up in a mic.

"And here they are! The guys you've all been waiting for! Corroded Coffin!" someone announced as a guitar riff started, and they walked on the stage together, taking their places on stage.

Your heart stopped when you saw Eddie with the same kind of guitar he had tattoed, as he winked at you, playing along on his guitar as he walked across the stage and stood right in front of you.

The concert was a complete blur, you remember bits and pieces of Becca eyeing you when Eddie held his gaze on you a bit to long, and that Eddie leaned down towards you, keeping his eyes on you as the lead singer sang a song about sex or something, you didn't really pay full attention to the lyrics as your eyes was held with Eddie's.

They had walked off the stage after their show, and you and Becca walked back to the bar to get some new drinks as you overheard some girls talking shit.

"How can the guitarist like a fat lump like her?" they tried to whisper, but to no use, and Becca got mad straight away, barking at them.

"Excuse you? Who you calling fat?" she asked, sass clear in her voice as she scolded the girls with her eyes. If only they knew who they were up against, nothing stopped Becca if she was determined to crush someone about your looks. It had happened before, and you knew Becca had your back whenever.

She walked closer to them, and pointed a finger at them as they looked at her with fright.

"You shut up, or else I'm gonna make you eat your own hand" she growled, and the girls nodded anxiously, before they ran out of the venue.

"You know you didn't have to do that, right?" you said as Becca sat down beside you again.

"Do what?" someone said behind you, hugging you from behind.

Hi, Eddie. You smiled, as your head leaned against his shoulder, enjoying being in his arms again.

"Just some girls fatshaming her" Becca said to Eddie, and Eddie scoffed.

"Well, screw them, you are beautiful, and you should know you are" he said as he kissed your neck, making you squeal.

"Gareth likes you, by the way" Eddie said as someone sat beside Becca again, and his head hung straight away.

"Eddie! Why?" he said, as Eddie laughed, making Becca turn her head towards the curly shy guy as he looked up at Becca and gave her an awkward smile.

"Hi, I'm Gareth" he said, and Becca chuckled.

"You're cute, I'm Becca" she said, greeting him as he seemed to relax.

"What you drinking, sweetie?"

"Vodka and coke" you said as he waved down the bartender and ordered you another drink, as he ordered a beer for himself.

You sat there talking together with Gareth and Becca before they disappeared, and Becca told you to not wait for her as she dragged Gareth after her out the door.

You laughed as you leaned against Eddie, who's hand was at the small of your back.

"I've missed you" he whispered into your ear, and you bit your lip.

"I missed you too" you said, looking up at him.

He leaned in to kiss you, and you didn't stop him. Your lips melting together as one, as he wrestled with your tongue for passage to your mouth. You would normally care that you were in public, but right now? You've been craving him so bad, you didn't really care at all.

You moved to stand between his legs, as he grabbed your ass, squeezing lightly as he smiled against your lips.

"Oh, how I've missed you" he said, smirking against your lips. You playfully swat his chest as he chuckles, enveloping you in another heatful kiss.

You just stand there, exploring eachothers bodies as you kiss, and suddenly it hits you as you pull away from him.

He looks at you in confusion, as you huff slightly.

"We're in public" you whispered, and he just chuckled, smiling at you.

"No one knows who we are here anyway, look around" he said as he leaned in to kiss your neck, but you pushed him away.

He looked at you, and cocked his head to the side in confusion.

"You wanna go out to my van instead?" he asked, and you nodded.

"Let's just finish our drinks, and we'll head out of here?"

You smiled, pecking his lips before you leaned into his chest, taking in the scent of him.

"I've missed you" you mumble against his chest as his arm reach up to stroke soft circles on the small of your back.

"I missed you too" he mumbles against your head before he places a soft kiss to it.

He lead you out of the bar, and back to where he had parked his van as you leaned into him the entire way, holding on to him as if he would disappear on you if you let go.

He opened the door for you, and you climbed in, laying down on the floor where he had some blankets laid out, and it seemed like he had been living there for some time, making you look around in confusion.

"Me and mom had an argument, I didn't wanna go home, so I've been living here lately" he said, making you look at him as he climbed in with you, closing the door and laying down just beside you, motioning for you to lay in the crook of his arm as you climbed closer to him, snuggling closer.

"That's why you haven't seen me around lately, she got angry at me for leaving you the day your dad asked me to look out for you" he said as you looked up at him.

"I wanted to tell her that we were together all night, but instead of letting her know, I threw a fit over her being a bitch about it, and left" he shrugged, and you sent him a "I'm sorry"-look as he huffed.

"But now we're together again, and I wouldn't have it any other way" he said as he kissed your forehead, making you smile.

"Your mom has been with my dad non stop since the first date, and it has driven me almost crazy that you never came in the door with her whenever she came to visit"

Fuck, what would you guys do if your dad and Haley actually became a couple?

"I have a strange question" you started, and he looked down at you, smiling.

"What if they become a couple?" you asked, and he tensed a bit before he relaxed again.

"Fuck, I haven't even thought about that" he started "But I don't think it would stop me from wanting to fuck you or taste you on my tongue any time I looked at you" he stated, which made you chuckle.

"It doesn't creep you out that we could be step siblings?" you said as you leaned onto your elbow, looking up at him. He shook his head no.

"Not really, we would never be related at all" he smirked, and you giggled. Guess that was true.

"It would be very difficult to keep my hands off you whenever we would be together with out parents, but I think it could work" he stated, and you could feel the lump in your stomach disappear.

He would still want you if it became more than just some dates with your parents, and that made you smile. You never thought in your wildest imagination that he would still want you. You knew deep down it was wrong, but even if it was wrong in some way, your entire body screamed yes. You wanted him, and he wanted you.

You sat up, looking at him, smiling as he leaned his head up on some pillow he had beside him so he could look at you better.

You surprised him with straddling his lap, enveloping him in a passionate kiss as your hands roamed his body.

"I've been craving you so bad" you said in between kissing him. His hips bucked up into you, and you could feel he wanted you just as bad as you smiled against his lips.

His hands roamed your body just the same, before one came up to your hair, pulling lightly while the other grabbed onto your butt, squeezing it as he moaned into your mouth.

"Fuck, I want you so bad" he said as you grinded against him, making him moan even more from the friction.

"I'm yours, Eddie" you moaned against his lips.

He didn't even hesitate to switch places with you, so you laid down on your back, with him hovering over you. Even if you were a big girl, he managed to manhandle you for being such a skinny boy compared to you. It always surprised you how he could flip you over like you were air.

He were looking at you, taking in your outfit before he grabbed a tit and squeezed.

"You have to use this outfit more often, you look stunning" he said before he kissed you hungrily, grinding his crotch into your heated core, making you gasp from the friction.

"Eddie, please" you whimpered, and he stopped sucking your neck, to look you in the eyes.

"Please, what princess?" he teased, and you whined, thrusting your clothed pussy against him. He tensed up a bit from the friction, before he chuckled.

"Alright, alright" he hummed against your skin as he worked his way down your body with kisses before he stopped right above your clothed pussy, kissing your pelvis before he lifted up your skirt and smiled, seeing the panties he told you he loved so much.

"Were you expecting me?" he asks, and you chuckle, knowing that you in fact expected him to be there today just because he was a metal head himself. Little did you know he was the guitarist for the band that played.

"Oh how I've missed this" he says before he inhales the scent of your aroused pussy as he shoves your panties to the side, and dives in.

You gasp from the contact, before your hands snake into his hair, pulling lightly. He hums against your pussy, licking up all your juices before he chuckles.

"You taste so damn sweet" he cooes as he inserts a finger slowly, making you squirm from the contact, hips bucking up into his mouth as he hums.

"That's it baby" he cooes as he pumps it in and out of you. The sounds from your wet pussy and his finger pumping in and out of you is intoxicating, making you even wetter by the second listening to the power he has over your body.

You could feel the warmth from your lower belly rise, but tried to push it away. You didn't wanna cum just yet, you wanted to savour this. It's been so long.

"If you wanna cum, you can, I can just do it again" he says, as you moan his name loudly. His words sending you over the edge as you pulsate around his finger.

He lets you ride out your high, before he chuckles and hovers over you again, pulling his finger out of you, and pushing it into your mouth to lick it clean.

"Missed me that much, huh?" he smirks, before he kisses you hungrily.

"You taste so much better off your own lips sweetheart" he cooes you, as he grinds his erection against you.

"Please" you whimper in between kisses, and he hums as he pulls down his pants, his boxers following, releasing his erection as it slaps on your thigh before he plays with your folds, making you whimper even more.

His lips crash on yours as he inserts himself into you, and you both moan in unison.

"So... fucking.. tight.." he moans, as he gets used to the feeling of being inside you. Your nails dig into his back, and he whinces a bit from the pain before he hungrily sucks onto your neck, marking it as he slowly starts moving.

You both breathe heavily as he moves a bit faster, but deeper in you, your nails scratching at his back as he whinces, sucking onto your neck.

"Fuck, I've missed you" he says as he leans up to kiss you hungrily. You can feel yourself getting close, and whimpers.

"If you keep talking like that, I'm gonna cum" you warn him, and he stops his movements before he looks at you, deep in your eyes, trying to catch his breath.

"Cum with me? I'm close too" he asks, and you nods, motioning for him to continue when you buck your hips up to meet his.

He understands the mission you sent him on, and pounds into you hard and fast, moaning your name as his hand goes down to cup your tit, squeezing your nipple hard.

"Fuck baby, I'm cumming!" you moan, as his thrusts gets sloppier, and you pulse around him as he finds his own release, emptying himself inside you before he flops down on top of you, his dick still inside as you both try to catch your breath.

You just lay there for a while, catching your breath as he softens inside you.

He suddenly chuckles, and looks at you.

"You know I can feel you clenching, right? If you want another round, just say so princess" he smirks at you, and you can feel your cheeks heat up.

"Aw, are you suddenly shy now?" he cooes, pecking your lips. "Just say the word, and I'll fuck your brains out, sweetie" he winks, and you nod.

"And that means?"

Oh fuck, he really want you to tell him with words.

"Please, fuck me" you say after clearing your throat.

And Eddie does just that. The most intense orgasm you've had in weeks, is his work. He is the only person who's been able to make you cum that hard. You never wanna go back to knowing how it was without him again. Never.

When the morning comes, you wake up in his arms, his hair a mess, and so are yours. Your makeup all smeared and fucked up after getting facefucked by him, and your hair a mess after several rounds with him. Who knew sex in a van would be so breathtakingly awesome?

You look up at his sleeping face, and you could almost swear that he was smiling in his sleep. His face naked and sweaty after the antics from last night. He looked absolutely stunning laying there, all fucked and happy.

"Take a picture, it'll last longer" he says as he opens his eyes and smiles down at you.

"Good morning, beautiful" he cooes against your lips, as you kiss him eagerly back.

"Good morning, handsome" you say against his lips, as his hand reaches up into your hair to drag you closer to him.

"Wanna get some breakfast?" he asks after some time, pulling away from the kiss, as you look over him, smiling for yourself when you see that kissing you made him excited.

"You sure you don't want me to take care of that first?" you say as you point down to his erection. He scoffs, and smiles.

"I mean, if you want too" he says as you lean down, sitting up on your knees as you start cupping him.

His hips buck up into your hand, and you stop touching him. He whimpers slightly.

"I'm in charge now, pretty boy" you wink at him, and he huffs before his head falls down on the pillow.

You cup him again, and he groans.

You smile as you start to stroke him softly, making him buck up into your hand, making you stop again.

You tsk at him, and he whimpers.

You look at him, and he lays his head down again.

"Okay, I'll be good" he says, and you almost jump out of your skin when someone knocks on the window.

"If there's someone inside, you have to move your car" the person on the outside says, as you both rush to gather your clothes, and you can't find your top as you look around, while Eddie is quick to jump in the front, no t shirt on or anything besides his boxers as he rolls down the window to talk to the person on the outside.

"Sorry officer, I'll move" he says, as the officer says something back as Eddie ignites the van, and drives off.

"Uhm, Eds, I can't find my clothes" you say, and he looks at you from his rearview mirror.

"Take one of my shirts, the Iron Maiden one is big enough to fit, I'm sure" he reassures you as you look around and find the shirt he's talking about.

He was right. The shirt fit enough to hang a bit loose on you, and you can only imagine how small Eddie would look wearing it.

"Is the skirt you wore last night okay?" he asks, and you nod, climbing in the front with him as he looks at you, almost driving off the road as your butt is in his face.

"Hey, watch the road mister! How much I'd love to die beside you, today is not the day" you say as you let out a loud huff as you sit down beside him, and he chuckles.

One of his hands land on your thigh as he smiles, rubbing small circles on your soft skin as he steals small glances at you without driving off the road.

"You'd die beside me?" he smiles, and you look up at him, reaching up to brush away some lipstick on his cheek.

"I would" you say, as his hand squeeze your thigh, smiling at you.

"I'll drive you home, hopefully your dad isn't home" he says as he turns onto the highway on the way back to Hawkins.

You lean into his arm as he drives off.

You could get used to this. You could get used to being beside Eddie during anything. He made you feel so safe, and wanted at that too. No one has ever made you feel like just a regular girl despite the size you were. He looked at you like a kid looks at a whole isle of free candy, and you could never get enough of it or him for that matter.

He drove off onto your street, and you could see your house from where you were. Fuck. Both your dad's car and Haley's car were in the driveway. Eddie slowed down a bit as he saw his mom and your dad come outside, standing there, looking like they judged him.

They couldn't see you beside him because of the angle, but Haley knew that it was her son driving there by the way she stood glaring at the car.

He stopped right beside the sidewalk up to your house, and your dad saw you as you opened the door.

"Sweetie!" he said, running up to you to check on you.

"Are you okay? What happened to your clothes?" he asked, and you chuckled, holding him at arms lenght.

"I'm fine dad, I crashed with Eddie after the show last night, and he borrowed me this so I could sleep in"

A little white lie never hurt, right? He didn't have to know the whole truth, right?

"Edward Munson! What do you think you're doing?!" his mom started yelling at him, and you could see Eddie got worried straight away. "Do you think you can just disappear and show up like nothing happened, young boy!?" she yelled, and you walked over to Eddie, mouthing sorry to your dad as he nodded for you to just continue.

"Mrs. Munson, I'm sorry that Eddie showed up like this, but he drove me home and kept me safe after last night since he was at the same concert as me" you smiled, and Haley looked at you and huffed. Glaring at her son.

"This is not over" she said to Eddie as she smiled towards you.

"Now come inside and get some breakfast, the both of you!" she said, motioning for you all to join her inside.

Excuse you? Who the fuck do you think you are?

Eddie's hand landed at the small of your back as your dad walked in with Haley.

He leaned down and whispered in your ear.

"Thank you baby" he said, kissing your neck before he dragged you with him inside for breakfast.

Oh boy, it would be difficult to keep your hands off him, that's for sure.

~~~~~~~~~~

Taglist: @eddiemunsonfuxks, @grimmbunniee, @jadeylovesmarvelxo, @charleetheefictionalfucker, @anaisweird, @marsmunson86, @eddiethesexy, @readsalot73, @sherrylyn628, @sammararaven, @sllooney, @warmaidensrevenge, @unefemmeiconique, @salenorona23

[helloalycia]

overstepping [one] // jane banner (Wind River)

summary: after getting several voicemails from your colleague and best friend with her asking for your backup, you attempt to call her back, only to get no answer.

warning/s: mentions of rape, murder and injuries.

author’s note: this is a two parter because i finally watched Wind River and it broke my heart but also lizzie was v cute and i felt the need to write this, hope you like it x

part two | masterlist | wattpad

"C'mon, work you stupid phone," I complained for the millionth time, before standing on the chair to get a better signal.

When I saw the bars in the corner of the screen increase, a grin appeared on my lips. I loved my parents, but the fact that they lived in a remote cabin in Tennessee with zero signal was not my favourite thing.

When the bars remained, my phone decided to actually be helpful and receive all the messages, calls and voicemails I missed. I did a brief flick through, noticing nothing was too important that couldn't wait for me to return to work. As an FBI agent, I rarely got time off. And now that I had taken a two month vacation to spend with my parents, I was adamant on enjoying it, even if I was missing work a smidge.

Next were the calls, which I noticed were mostly from my colleague and close friend, Jane Banner. I furrowed my brows, realising she'd left me several voicemails, too, which was strange since she knew I was on a break from work. What could be so important?

I sighed, glancing down at my uncomfortable position standing on the chair and leaning above the wardrobe. It was the only place in the house with decent signal and the only other place that wasn’t in the middle of nowhere was twenty minutes out. Telling myself I'd just listen to one voicemail to make sure everything was okay, I played the earliest message.

"Hey, Y/N. I'm sorry, I know you're on a break, but I just had to talk to you," it began, and Jane sounded troubled. "I was in Vegas, as you know, but I've been called out to a reservation in Wyoming where this poor girl was–" She paused, releasing a shaky breath. "She was raped and left to die out in the cold. I thought I could send in another team to take a look – y'know, usual protocol. But the coroner won't rule it a homicide and you know what that means."

I swallowed hard, knowing exactly what that meant. If it wasn't ruled a homicide, no backup would come and we had to move onto the next case. But if this girl was raped and left to die, the rapist was still out there and wasn't getting caught by the FBI.

"I can't just leave it and go," Jane continued quietly, with that recognisable passion for her job evident in her voice. "I have to do what I can. But I... I can't do this alone. It's not like other cases, Y/N. It's different out here. And there's only so much their police department can do. I know you're on a break, but I was hoping that, maybe, you could come out here and help me? It's the Wind River Indian Reservation. That's it, I guess. Bye."

The message ended and I found myself chewing on my lower lip anxiously, unable to think about anything other than Jane now. She'd worried me with that one voicemail alone – I couldn't imagine what the others said.

She was usually so good at dealing with cases, but this seemed different. She sounded shaken up, attempting to put on a brave face by the sounds of it. What was so different about this case? She didn't need me. She was capable.

Curiosity got the better of me and I played the second message, ignoring the discomfort in my arms as I stretched to maintain the signal. It was left a day after the first one.

"Hey, so I just remembered that you said you don't get much signal up there with your parents," she began apologetically. "I don't mean to– shit, it's so cold..." There was a pause, a noise in the background, then she continued, "Sorry, just turning up the heating. Anyway, I was saying. I don't mean to intrude on your break. I just– I'm hoping you'll find signal and hear this because I could really use your help. I think we've got a lead on who may have done it. It was hectic today. Really could've used that backup."

She chuckled dryly at her attempt at a joke, but all I felt was guilt. She sounded exhausted within a day of being there.

"I hope you get this," she finished with a sigh. "I should go. Got a busy day tomorrow. Hope you're doing okay. Bye."

I wasted no time in playing the next message. Three days into her case.

"I don't know why I keep sending these," she began with a hoarse voice, and my heart clenched at the sound of it. "You clearly aren't getting them in time. But it's easier talking to you like this than not at all."

It went quiet, so quiet that I thought she may have finished and forgot to hang up. But then she spoke up again, a whimper escaping her lips.

"It's so hard," she admitted. "We've covered worse cases, but this one... everything about it makes me uncomfortable. Something doesn't feel right. I've got a lead – we think it might be the boyfriend who did it and we're gonna see him tomorrow. But I don't know."

I frowned, squeezing my phone tightly because I didn't recognise the girl speaking as my friend. This girl sounded broken and I wondered what she could have discovered that made her like this.

"I've got the police department with me for backup," she said with a sniffle. "And Cory, he's a hunter whose been helping me with the case. They're all gonna be with me tomorrow. But I wish you were here, too. You always make things easier."

The lump in my throat wouldn't disappear no matter how many times I swallowed it. She made things easier, too. Always. And all I wanted to was be by her side and be there for her like she always was for me.

"Sorry about this," she said with a watery laugh, and I could imagine the embarrassed smile on her face as she did. "I sound like such an idiot. Never mind these messages. Just enjoy your break. I shouldn't be worrying you like this. See you when you get back."

The message ended and I checked to see if there were anymore, but to my disappointment, there wasn't. That message was from a few days ago and she hadn't sent anything since which was concerning in itself.

Trying not to panic for no reason, I called Jane. Hopefully everything was okay and I was being stupid. She was a fully-trained FBI agent. She could take care of herself. Right?

The call rang and rang, but nobody picked up. One missed call. No biggie. She probably heard it and couldn't find her phone or something. So, I tried again.

More ringing and no answer. Okay, no big deal. Just try again.

Another call and no answer. The chewing on my lip became more intense. Why the hell wasn't she picking up? Was she still working the case?

I waited an hour, trying again at ten minute intervals, unable to fight my concern. But there was no answer every time and I realised that I couldn't sit and wait for her to call back. Not after how she sounded in those voicemails.

No, I had to go there. She needed backup.

—

Wyoming was way colder than I could have prepared for.

I mean, technically, I prepared for nothing. I bid my parents a goodbye, threw some random clothes in a bag and caught the next plane over there. I tried for Jane's phone constantly, knowing she was never one to ignore me for this long, but there was no point. She wasn't answering, which could only mean so much.

When I reached the reservation, I had no idea where anything was or what I was looking for exactly. I just knew that as soon as the taxi dropped me off in the centre of town, I didn't know where to go.

There were a lot of locals hanging around, so my first port of call was to ask them if they'd seen Jane around – or Agent Banner, as she may have introduced herself. I showed them a picture of her on my phone, described her with vivid detail, but they just stared at me like I was crazy. I was starting to believe I was at one point, until I stopped by the convenience store.

As worried as I was for Jane's whereabouts, the chill in my bones was real. Especially my hands, which I was certain would fall off any minute. So, I decided to buy some gloves and also ask the cashier if he'd seen Jane around or heard anything of her. Whilst I was doing that, a customer caught my attention, probably having overheard my conversation.

"Did you say Jane Banner?" he asked with a quirked brow, interrupting my purchase. "The FBI lady, right?"

I nodded quickly, facing him. "Yes, that's her! D'you know where she is?"

He nodded casually. "Yeah, she's in the hospital. That big shootout that happened a few days ago, right?"

My stomach dropped. "The what?"

"The shootout," he repeated, not aware of the concern in my face. "At the drill site. A bunch of officers were killed and the FBI lady was one of the only one left standing." He tutted as he shook his head. "Very lucky that one."

A shootout? The hospital? Only one left standing? No wonder she hadn't been answering her calls.

"Can you– do you–" I stopped, clearing my throat and trying to stop freaking out. "Which hospital?"

After getting the address from him, I caught a taxi to the only hospital in town and prayed to God that Jane was okay. The one thing she'd asked for was backup and I couldn't even give her that. If I'd just looked at my messages sooner... fuck.

Getting past the front desk and to Jane's room was no issue at all. A quick flash of my FBI badge was enough for the receptionist to give me the details and wave me through. My heart was constricting in my chest the longer it took. What if it was really bad? What if that customer's intel was outdated and Jane was– no. I couldn't afford to think like that.

Upon finding Jane's room, I spotted an older man leaving through the door, being careful to close it behind him. I didn't recognise him at all.

"Excuse me," I called, earning his attention. "Is that Jane Banner's room you just came from?"

He seemed surprised, glancing over his shoulder to make sure I was speaking to him, before nodding. "Yes. Sorry, who are you?"

I pulled my badge from my pocket and showed him, though I doubted anyone would take me seriously when my eyes were watering at thought of Jane being severely injured.

"I'm her friend," I said, swallowing down the lump in my throat before lowering my badge.

"Oh, you're the backup that didn't come," he said with realisation.

My eyes flickered to the floor guiltily. He wasn't exactly wrong.

"I didn't mean it like that," he added quickly. "Sorry, I didn't mean to upset you."

I shook my head, lifting my eyes to meet his. "It's okay. I should've... I should've been here." It went quiet as he didn't know what to say, so I looked to him halfheartedly. "I assume you're from the police department, one of the ones who helped Jane."

"Not exactly," he said, before putting out his hand for me to shake. "Name's Cory. I'm a hunter by trade."

Returning his handshake, I recalled Jane's voicemail. "Oh, yeah, she mentioned you... thank you for helping her out."

When I couldn’t, I added in my head.

He offered me a small smile and I couldn't find it in myself to return it. I must have looked like shit, since he gave me a pitiful gaze.

"You want me to catch you up before you go in?" he asked, nodding to Jane's door. "She's okay by the way."

I nodded, sucking up a breath. My nerves were eating away at me the longer I didn't see Jane – half of me was terrified of what I'd find, and the other half was afraid she'd be upset or angry because I left her to it, even when she pleaded for my help.

Cory and I took a seat down the hall and he proceeded to explain about the case and how they found the guy who raped that poor girl. The shootout was the worst bit, making me shiver with discomfort. Apparently, Jane had gotten blasted with a shotgun, puncturing her torso and neck despite the vest she wore. All of the officers with her were killed and by the sounds of it, Jane almost was, too. But Cory managed to take out the criminals and the rapist himself. When he was finished telling me, I had no words.

"She's a bit shaken up, but her surgery went well," Cory reassured with a short nod. "Does she know you're coming?"

I shook my head, voice thick with emotion. "She wouldn't answer her phone. I guess I know why now."

Cory nodded, rubbing the back of his neck before sparing me a consoling glance. "She talked about you a lot. I think it'll cheer her up seeing you. You should go."

My eyes met his, teary and stinging with unshed tears. "Thank you so much."

He shrugged bashfully, but he didn't realise all that he'd done. I gave him a small, tight smile before standing up with a sigh. No point dwelling anymore – I had to see her.

Pushing my selfish feelings aside, I sucked it up and approached Jane's room. She would either want to punch me or not, but either way, I had to see if she was okay. And so, when I opened the door slightly, heart racing in my chest, said heart jumped in my throat at the sight of her.

She was laying on the bed with wires stuck in her and, only from what I could see, bandages were covering the side of her neck. I thought she was sleeping at first, but then her head tilted towards the door curiously, and bright blue eyes widened with disbelief.

"Y/N?" she asked, raising her eyebrows. "What are you– how did you get here?"

I closed the door behind me and hesitantly approached her bedside, unable to stop my eyes from soaking in the sight of her. She looked so feeble and vulnerable and unlike how I saw her last. Then, Cory's words came back to me and I began to imagine the worst scenario of her getting shot, blood seeping from her wounds, the life draining from her eyes...

"Y/N," she called, and I looked to her startlingly, hoping I didn't look as troubled as I felt.

"Sorry," I said, clearing my throat. "I, er– the messages. Voicemail. I heard them and tried calling you back, but..."

She pursed her lips, exhaling with a wince and looking up at the ceiling, as if suddenly remembering she left messages in the first place.

"I'm sorry I didn't come sooner," I said quietly, guilt seeping back in.

"No, no, don't be," she said, and I just about noticed the pink dusting her cheeks. "It's not your fault. I shouldn't have interrupted your vacation like that. I know you said you wanted a break and–"

"Jane, no, don't even say that," I cut her off, reaching for her hand in an instant. She looked my way, eyes flickering between mine nervously. I squeezed her hand gently and said, "I should have been here. You needed me and I– I didn't come. Maybe if I had, this could have ended differently."

She tried to smile, but I could see the discomfort in her eyes. "It's not that bad, honestly. It just looks bad."

I pressed my lips together, eyes falling to the bandage on her neck. Even though it was big and covered her wound, I could still make out the bruising around it from the impact of the shell. I didn't imagine the torso wound looking any different, and that thought alone made me regret leaving her alone. It was very much as bad as it looked; I knew that and she knew that.

Her lips trembled as she avoided my eyes, her own tearing up. I pushed away my guilt momentarily and changed the subject.

"So, I met Cory. He seems like a great guy."

She didn't say anything as she seemed lost in thought. Either that or she was trying not to cry in front of me. I hoped it wasn't the latter, since the last thing I wanted was to make her feel uncomfortable.

"You know," I said, when she wouldn't speak, "I'm pretty sure I told you to stay safe before I left for my vacation."

At my poor attempt to lighten the mood, she cracked a small, tight smile, but a smile nonetheless, and my racing heart slowed down momentarily.

"I'm glad you're okay," I said, now that I had her attention again, and she looked my way with a softened expression. "Kind of okay. But you know... okay."

Thankfully, she knew what I meant and her hand tightened around mine.

"I'm glad you came," she returned, and I couldn't look away even if I tried. She was always able to trap me with a single gaze.

With a tug of her hand, she motioned for me to sit on the edge of her bed, so I did. And then she began to ask me about my vacation, what I'd been up to this past month, how my parents were... basically anything and everything except for the case. And it was understandable, since she was reminded of it all the time. If I could be a form of escapism for her, so be it. It was the least I could do.

We spoke for hours until the nurse came in to let me know visiting hours were over and I'd have to come back tomorrow. With a regretful sigh, I got up from my seat on her bedside and stretched my limbs.

"Where are you staying?" she asked, a slight frown on her lips.

I smiled awkwardly, realising I didn't think that far ahead. "I'm not gonna lie, I don't know. I came straight here. There's gotta be a hotel or something in this town, right?"

She nodded and flicked her hand to the shelves on the other side of the room. "You should stay in my room in the inn. Key's in my bag over there."

"Oh, I don't have to do that–"

"Y/N, it's not like I'm going to be staying there anytime soon," she cut me off, smiling halfheartedly. "Please."

I chewed on my lip and nodded, giving in. When I grabbed her keys from her bag, I stopped by her bedside and gave her a supportive smile.

"I'll back first thing in the morning, if you don't mind," I said, and she finally gave me a smile that reached her eyes.

"I'd like that."

I nodded, resting a hand on hers and squeezing comfortingly. "Goodnight."

—

Though I knew Jane was okay, I still couldn't stop myself from thinking about her all night. The sight of her wounds and the broken expression on her face was enough to keep me awake. And the guilt that came with it all... why couldn't I have just picked up my damn phone?

As promised, I returned to Jane's hospital room the next morning, this time bringing some breakfast snacks from the hospital cafeteria since I knew the food would be much better than whatever they were serving her. Judging by the content expression on her face when I gave it to her, I was right.

When she finished eating, she was able to sit up slightly and move over on her bed, urging for me to join her and watch some TV with her. There was no way I was going to turn down that offer, so I slid next to her and kept a packet of sliced apples between us as we watched whatever was playing on the TV.

About halfway through watching, she spoke up randomly, taking me by surprise.

"When are you leaving?"

I tore my gaze from the screen and realised she was staring at me with intense green eyes.

"When you're well enough to," I answered truthfully.

She looked down to her hands. "You don't have to stay with me. You can go."

I studied her profile, knowing it was the wrong time to appreciate how stunning she looked even when she was makeup-free, sporting a bed head and tired.

"Do you want me to go?" I asked softly, afraid I may have overstepped.

She was quick to shake her head slightly, finally lifting her gaze to meet mine with glossy ones. "No."

I nodded, trying very hard not to smile, cleared my throat and grabbed her hand. "Then I'm not leaving. I'll be right here until you get better and I can take you home."

A ragged breath escaped her lips as she nodded in response. We both looked back to the TV and I noticed she didn't let go of my hand, her fingers warm to the touch and giving me goosebumps at the contact. But I wouldn't have had it any other way.