#seventeen cards. and I still keep them in a box underneath my bed 22 years later because it proves that someone at some point cared about me
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i’m not even a person, i’m just a bunch of traumas stacked on top of each other in a trench coat made of fandoms.
personality ? me ? no no, that’s just season 4 of community. common mistake though !
#cptsd culture is#cptsd#bpd#borderline personality disorder#i am just a-okay fine-a-doodle-do#I am not well-adjusted. and more often than not I am barely keeping it together. I’m constantly texting and there’s no one on the other end#I’m just a grown man who can’t even look his own friends in the eye for too long because I’m too afraid they’ll see that I am broken.#one time when I was in seventh grade I told everyone I had appendicitis. I wanted someone to worry about me. but when Beth Brannon asked to#see the scar I didn’t wanna get found out. so I took mom’s scissors and I made one. it hurt like hell but it was worth it because I got#seventeen cards. and I still keep them in a box underneath my bed 22 years later because it proves that someone at some point cared about me#I also have a collection of cards like that#them: why do you like things so much god the materialism#me: I got myself that Gengar plushie for my birthday#my sibling and I went to a sketch thinkgeek store in a sketch mall in a sketch area bc I had a coupon#it was super uncomfortable but I found my guy#then we got Dunkin and I surprised my dad at work with a bagel#then Robin and I hung out at their place and it was a really lovely day#that’s why.
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