#set in the same universe as the world was built for two... dont ask me when

[foggieststars]

feed me please.

for you my love... thank you for all of your wonderful art i hope u know how much i appreciate u!!!! pls have some girl charles getting fingered at the FIA gala for your efforts <3

-

Charles doesn't think anything of it at first, when Max's hand brushes against her knee. They're packed in like sardines around this table, and she thinks he's just adjusting his chair, or something.

At first.

They're awarding some of the junior categories right now, fresh-faced F1 hopefuls bumbling their way through grateful speeches. Charles remembers when that was her, looking out across a sea of faces, searching for the F1 drivers, hoping beyond everything that one day it would be her.

And now it is. She made it to F1, she's here to collect her runner-up trophy, and underneath the tablecloth she's got her biggest rival's hand inching steadily up her thigh.

Charles stiffens when Max's hand reaches the hem of her dress. She turns towards him under the guise of a joke, leans in as if she's trying to be heard over the voice of the announcer.

"What the fuck are you doing?" she hisses into Max's ear, smiling when she pulls away. Max's hand tightens around her thigh in response, thumb brushing over the sensitive skin of her inner thigh. The hair on Charles’ arms stands on end.

“What do you mean?” Max asks, and Charles dares a glance around them. The cameras are focused on the stage for now, thank god, but she knows they’ll be doing a sweep of the tables soon, trying to grab reactions from relevant people. There’s hardly anyone more relevant here than Max. 

“Your girlfriend’s here,” Charles reminds him through clenched teeth, though she doesn’t know where the delightful Eloise has run off to. 

Max shrugs, hand travelling higher, thumb continuing those gloriously broad sweeps of skin. “So’s your boyfriend.” 

Charles hasn’t even seen Louis in half an hour. He’ll be in a corner somewhere, schmoozing with anybody who looks like they might be important. 

Charles can feel her heartbeat loud in her ears, a warmth spreading through her body. Max’s hand doesn’t stop moving, pausing at the very apex of her thigh. 

Anyone could see them like this. Anyone at all. The thought shouldn’t make Charles’ cunt throb. 

“Besides,” Max says, voice low, so as not to catch the attention of Lando, only two seats away and looking terminally bored. “You like this, yes?” 

Charles bites down on her bottom lip, wondering if any of her lipstick will transfer to her teeth. She doesn’t say anything, just blows out a shaky breath when Max’s fingertips move further, searching for something he’s not going to find. 

His fingers still when they reach the damp heat between her thighs. “Are you–” he chokes, a gentle colour rising in his cheeks. 

“You cannot wear underwear with this dress,” she mutters defensively, trying not to hitch her hips up into the barely-there sensation of his fingers. 

Max snorts, shakes his head in disbelief. “Whatever you say.” 

Charles is about to snap something at him, and then his thumb finds her clit. She shuts her mouth so sharply her teeth click together. She has to, otherwise she might scream.

It’s not that sex with her boyfriend is bad, per se - it’s just lacking. In what, Charles doesn’t know. Louis is good with his hands, with his tongue. There’s just no passion. Louis likes candlelit dinners, nights snuggled up on the sofa watching a terrible movie. 

It’s the opposite of the way Max makes her feel. Basically all the two of them have is passion. Charles struggles to imagine Max wanting to go to her mother’s apartment for brunch on a Sunday, taking long walks by the sea. 

As Max grins at her and rolls her clit with his thumb, Charles struggles to remember why that’s supposed to be a bad thing. It must be a bad thing, because otherwise there’d be no reason to keep it such a secret. But with his hand between her legs coaxing pleasure out of her, Charles can’t bring herself to feel even a little bit bad about it. 

“Fuck,” she whispers, aware of the way her face is heating up. Her eyes dart up to the stage, where they’re no longer handing out awards. Instead, it’s the chaos of category change, trophies being carried on and straightened up. The cameras are on the hosts of the event.

Charles slumps down in her seat slightly, creating a gap between her lower back and the seat. It’s uncomfortable, but the access it gives Max to her cunt makes it worth it.  

He takes the opening she’s given him, slides his index finger into her pussy with zero warning. Charles can’t help it; she lets a moan slip free at the sensation. It’s a toe-curling feeling. Fingering doesn’t usually do a whole lot for her on its own, but it’s the context. She’s surrounded by important people, men who could make or break her career with a snap of their fingers, and she’s letting Max finger her in front of them. 

She reaches for the glass in front of her on the table, picks it up with a slightly shaking hand. The water is cool and refreshing, and nowhere near enough to douse the growing fire inside of her.

Max slips another finger in, and Charles jerks in her seat, water spilling down her wrist. Lando raises his eyebrows in her direction, but turns back to talking to his neighbour pretty quickly. 

“Max,” Charles hisses. “You can’t - oh, fuck,” she moans, when his fingers curl inside of her. It’s too much, here, now. 

“I can’t what?” he asks, voice slightly too loud for her liking. “I can do anything I want. You’ll let me do anything to you, won’t you?” 

“Fuck you,” Charles grits out. She takes a deep, steadying breath through her nose. 

Unfortunately, he’s kind of right. Charles does things with Max she’d never dream of letting another guy do to her. She demands a high price in return; she’s pretty sure Max has never let any of his wispy little girlfriends fuck him with a strap-on. There’s nothing she won’t let him do to her, nothing he won’t let her do to him. 

Charles blames this horrible, animalistic thing that lives between their bodies. It’s like a livewire, electrifying and deadly to touch. Most men fall at her feet, but Max makes her crawl. 

His thumb finds her clit again, scissoring his fingers simultaneously. 

Charles bites down on the inside of her cheek so hard her mouth floods with the taste of metal. It’s better than screaming. 

And then, a man’s approaching Max, clapping him on the shoulder. The shoulder attached to the hand that’s currently inside of her. Charles thanks the lord for long tablecloths.

“Max!” the man’s saying. “I’ve been looking for you all night.” The man looks vaguely familiar when he smiles in her direction. Charles grimaces back at him, fully aware of the hot flush on her face. 

“Hello, Robert,” Max greets warmly, no indication that he’s currently fingering his rival under the table. “How are you doing?” He reaches for a handshake with his free hand, and Charles wants to die. 

They lapse into boring chatter, nothing that Charles really pays attention to. It’s not like she even can. The scope of her world has narrowed down to the feeling of Max’s fingers moving inside of her, the continuous pulse of her cunt, the wetness between her thighs. 

“And what about you, Charles?” the man asks, and now she wants to die even more. 

“Sorry?” she asks, smiling weakly. Max’s fingers start to move faster inside of her, his thumb circling her clit in a steady, unrelenting motion. “I was a bit - mm, lost in thought.” 

The man regards her warily. An FIA official, maybe? Charles can’t place him. 

“I was asking how you are enjoying the evening so far.” 

Oh, god, Charles can’t do this. There’s arousal building in her stomach, a tightening in anticipation. Clear evidence of it is running down her thighs. 

“Oh, you know,” she says, voice shaking. “Free food, free wine, a trophy. What is not to like?”

The man laughs, and Max smirks, crooking his fingers deliberately. The motion is obscene, a stroking motion right against that spot inside of her that makes her feel all twisted-up and squirmy. And also like she needs to piss. 

Christ, that’s all she needs - the first time in her life that she squirts, and she does it at the FIA gala. All over the world champion’s suit. 

Maybe that would finally encourage him to buy a new one. 

The man keeps talking to them, and Charles mostly gets away with smiles and nodding. He leaves, finally, with another clap on Max’s shoulder, a polite nod in her direction. 

“Fuck,” Charles whispers. “Jesus, Max.” 

Max’s thumb starts moving faster, tight, quick circles against her clit, drawing her to the edge. “Come on,” he grunts. Maybe his wrist is starting to hurt. Good. 

Charles moves her hips in tiny, aborted motions. She needs to do something to get the energy out, the fizzing anticipation racing through her bloodstream. It makes the tablecloth move, but Charles doesn’t have room left in her brain to care.

Charles’ hands curl into fists, nails cutting into her palms. The pain of it is clarifying, just in time for her orgasm to hit her like a freight train. 

Charles hitches forward in her seat, the feeling too much for her to cope with. She can’t hide her small moan of pleasure, the expression on her face. She ducks her face and fumbles for the buckle of her shoe, pretending to be fixing it, as the pleasure washes over her like a wave. 

The movement dislodges Max’s hand, practically flattens it against the seat, but Charles doesn’t care. She keeps it locked between her thighs even as he tries to withdraw, grinds out the aftershocks against his palm. Her cunt’s so slick with desire that there’s no resistance, just the smooth glide against his hand. 

“Charles,” Max says. “Can I have my hand back?” he sounds far too composed for her liking. 

Charles shifts, allows him to withdraw his arm. She can’t speak just yet. 

When he pulls his hand out from between her thighs, his fingers are glistening. Wet with her. He wipes them off on the tablecloth. It shouldn’t be hot, the thought of Max dirtying up these no doubt very expensive tablecloths with her desire, but it is. 

“You are a fucking bastard,” Charles tells him, and Max tosses his head back, laughs like he knows. 

Suddenly, there’s a harried looking production assistant at Charles’ shoulder, nudging her. 

“Yes?” Charles frowns at the woman, who smiles at her nervously. 

“You need to be backstage now.” She checks her watch. “Well, two minutes ago, actually.” 

“Oh,” Charles gasps, all too aware of the frantic throbbing of her heartbeat, the matching pulse in her cunt. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know it was our time so soon.” 

“That’s why Robert was over here, you know?” Max smiles at them politely. “He gave us a five-minute warning. You cannot have forgotten this already!” He laughs, and the assistant laughs too, though hers is tinged with panic. It can’t be a great time, rounding up disgruntled celebrities. 

Finally, it clicks where Charles knew the man who’d come to speak to them from. The fucking program co-ordinator, the guy who’d explained to them when they’d arrived how the trophies would be handed out and how much time they had to speak. Fuck. 

Charles is going to fucking kill him. 

She gapes wordlessly at Max, adrenaline rising in her body until she’s not sure whether she’s going to punch him in the face or start sprinting for the exit. He keeps smiling at her until she stands on shaking legs. 

Charles wishes she had a witty rejoinder to leave him with, something to show that his victory isn’t as complete as he’s imagining it to be. There’s nothing, nothing in her head. 

She turns and follows the woman on shaking legs, positively soaked between her thighs. She’ll be lucky if that doesn’t show up on camera, the bright lights reflecting off her skin when she crosses the stage to accept her third-place trophy. Maybe people will think it’s body glitter, or something. 

Louis appears out of nowhere, slings an arm around her shoulder, gives her a tight squeeze. 

“Good luck,” he tells her, pressing a kiss to her cheek just before the aide leads her backstage. “You’ll be wonderful.” 

Charles smiles wanly in his direction, guilt roiling in her stomach. She’d actually… forgotten he was even here tonight. 

She’s led backstage, and before she hands her purse off to the woman, she fumbles in it for her phone. 

“So sorry,” Charles tells her with an apologetic glance. The woman looks like she’d happily slit Charles’ throat right now, but Charles ignores her. 

She pulls up Max’s contact, thumbs flying over the keypad. 

Meet me in the bathroom once you have your trophy. 

Max’s reply is instantaneous. 

Why? 

Charles doesn’t bother to reply, hands her phone to the assistant. Max will do whatever she tells him to, even if he’s got to make an awkward excuse to his girlfriend. Charles plans to repay the favour. 

If she blows him after reapplying her lipstick, there’s no chance she doesn’t leave a ring of red around the base of his cock. A present for his girlfriend to find later. 

That’ll teach him not to fuck with her. 

[mothmage]

Hi! This is the same anon who asked about the Odysseus in White Silk series! Thank you so much for answering and sharing your works with us! For what it might be worth I really enjoyed all the fics in the series (and the time travel one shot)-I haven't read all the books but I really enjoyed the world you built with the characters, I think the stories all flowed well together! And I also love fics with Daniel's daughters, that would have definitely been interesting to read (I enjoyed your inclusion of them in the series and I liked the evolution of their dynamics with Armand as well, the funeral scene in Trojan Horse still hits me!) I definitely enjoyed the reddit post fic tho, I enjoyed the way you crafted the comments and people trying to put pieces together, esp with the last little warning comment from Louis lmao thank you again for sharing your thoughts! Could I also ask about Mid-Youth Crisis? I know that isn't finished yet but I'd love to hear more thoughts on it if you're comfortable! Thank you again!

YEAH OF COURSE OMG

so it’s unfinished only in the sense that there’s a sequel i’m still writing, but i can tell you that the sequel is set in dubai and it’s two parts — one rashda, one armand 👁️👁️ also a fun fact is that the first fic is obviously POV dani so from her perspective, it’s a hot and kind of weird hookup. from ARMAND’s perspective, however, she is like a watery mess at the brink of tears of the whole time. she’s reached her limit. she’s dani deprived. i think in this universe, armand probably “let her go” and wiped her memories when she found out dani was pregnant from a hookup or something? idk. it’s not super fleshed out bc it’s primarily a pornfic lmao. but it wasnt because of an argument, dani didnt ask to leave, and armand didnt want to let her go. kind of like my odysseus in white silk universe — i dont think thats what happened in the show, but it’s easy to write lmao

[escriveine]

Good Omens Author and Artist Recs

In honor of the tenth month, here are 10 Authors & Artists in the Good Omens fandom who are absolutely giving me joy and life right now. They each have published multiple pieces, and the intended audiences of these works range from general to mature-but-non-explicit to mature-and-quite-explicit.

The stories I most favor — including these recommendations — have happy endings, though not necessarily all works in the portfolios of the authors/artists will, so do read the tags and such for yourself.

(NB: The lists are alphabetical by username; it was hard enough selecting only 5 of each, don't ask me to rank them.)

Authors

ARK | @et-in-arkadia | AO3 Good Omens top-level: Ark

Start with the fic that pulse of my nights and days, a gorgeous, explicit romp that revels in revelations of pining, and love, and literary recitations.The way Aziraphale and Crowley gradually reveal themselves in confessions more naked than their bodies, in their desire to please one another in ways that augment, but are not strictly subject to, the sensual pleasure of the flesh is deeply engaging and soul-satisfying.

If you'd rather plunge into the fic that seared me with Aziraphale and Crowley's adjacent yet solitary pining, splintered me with mutually-recognized reciprocal angst (and Someone have mercy that I know that's a thing now), and finally made me actually cry when all hearts were mended (even mine), try this: these furious passions, these chances. It’s an exquisite agony and fierce, cathartic joy; a true paean to love and desire.

DRAWLIGHT | @drawlight | AO3 Good Omens top-level: drawlight

Start with the series Chiaroscuro, a kaleidoscope array of myth and legend and stories from time out of mind lived by two who would be lovers, would be loved, did they but know it. The tales take us from memory and starstuff, through living and revelations, to futures and syncretism; all of it suffused with light, light, light.

If Crowley's fears hurt, it is because I have held them, sliver-sharp and lying inside my own heart; when Crowley's rapture resounds, it is because each of us secretly knows the sound of blessed water falling on the desert — the echoes of love are built into our very fabric, waiting to reverberate. drawlight takes us through the moments, the tesserae of many colors with an intimate eye for hope, then shows us how the jangled tumble resolves into utter delight. It ends (though their story never really ends) as it begins (where all stories really begin) — in the stars.

FYRE | @amuseoffyre | AO3 Good Omens top-level: Fyre

Start with the series Crossing Paths, a sprawling, currently-41-chapter saunter Through the Ages with Aziraphale and Crowley. Each morsel of backstory is canon-compliant and richly evocative of its particular era, laced with enough detail to make this fellow history nerd’s heart soar (seriously, there are even endnotes giving specific context to the setting and pivotal flow of events).

But these are no dry ostraca, no cryptic, lifeless castoffs; these stories fairly shudder with the countervailing magnificence and wretchedness wrought by humans, each extreme alternately and seemingly arbitrarily condoned by Heaven and Hell. And this crucible of life on Earth refines something unexpected in the natures of both Aziraphale and Crowley — a tiny mustard seed of compassion that may have been intrinsic to their natures, but would never have come to fruition without being deliberately nurtured, sheltered, encouraged. It is something the other angels dismiss, and the other demons forswear. But over and over it draws these two incarnate immortals together, and the adversity that could have seared the heart right out of them instead makes them kind. And every bit of is in character. These stories made me cry and laugh and quail and hope and long for ever, ever more.

JESS THE RECKLESS | Twitter JessWhitecroft | AO3 Good Omens top-level: jessthereckless

Start with the series It's Not The End Of The World, Dear, a light-hearted romance exploring what happens when an ethereal and an occult being come together and have to navigate the supernatural repercussions of their involvement. The opening story picks up where canon left us, in a world saved and remade and spinning on. Aziraphale and Crowley work through what it means to be on their own side the way they do everything else, with snarky bickering and displacement activities and gravitating toward each other like two celestial bodies on close approach.

That delightful domestic fluff, with all its attendant joys and frustrations, gives us the opportunity to fall in love again with our pair of ineffable idiots even as they realize they’ve fallen in love with each other. There are picnics and portents, kisses and divine ecstasy, seduction and human pleasure. And so much outright hedonism, sexual exploration, and joyful fucking it feels positively sybaritic. Yet that’s not the end-all be-all here. Life is infinitely more interesting together, even as they tackle kitchen renovations and making dinner and assembling furniture. As Aziraphale quotes, Come live with me and be my love, and we will all the pleasures prove… The series is an ongoing indulgence, with another update posted just today (Oct-3).

LAURA SHAPIRO | @laurashapiro-noreally | AO3 Good Omens top-level: laurashapiro

Start with the series Leaves of Grass and the not-to-be-missed follow-on stories in the same universe: Working Hard in Damp Places and As Time Goes By. This extended series is everything great sex (and stories about great sex) should be — playful, joyful, loving. Daring. Scorching. An utterly delightful mix of banter and banging, pleasure and emotion, exploration and re-discovery with excellent character voices and interactions. It's incredibly fucking sexy and emotionally satisfying.

And lavish attention to detail makes Aziraphale and Crowley shine through as genuinely supernatural beings sharing the joys of their flesh (and all the very human transcendence that can bring). But there’s so much more, too. Laura weaves the most glorious, fulfilled and fulfilling yearning through every part of these works, and it's breath-taking. It's not just the scope of years for these immortal characters, but the depth, the breadth, the texture of their longing that's so amazing. Those first, nearly invisible tendrils first introduced in nearly offhand ways as "they talked, and they argued, and they dined and drank" ineluctably gather and twine into a great ribald ribbons of longing running through the fabric of their relationship — fascinating and inextricable.

Enjoyment of the wicked wordplay and cackle-inducing snark is left as an exercise for the lucky reader.

Artists

DRAWLIGHT | @drawlight | Good Omens Art Collection on AO3: as beautiful to me as lightning

Start with the piece I’m never getting over: and there, where my head pushed backwards (Original Tumblr post) (Full image on AO3)

Shared breath, shared gaze, shared being. Desire and connection flow through every line, thrilling the senses and stirring the soul. We are gorgeously suspended in the moment with them and know, in drawlight’s words, this is only the first time, never the last. I get happily lost in their soft blush of discovery and joy.

The rest of the collection well repays the looking with sweet heat, tender gestures, and the dawnglow of genuine love.

GEMENNAIR | @gemennair | Redbubble Shop: gemennair

Start with the piece I’m never getting over: Forbidden Friendship (Original Tumblr post)

A glimpse of their first picnic, in Eden. There is absolutely luminous joy in every shaft of sunlight, each dappled fruit, every green-gold leaf. And, of course, in the faces of Aziraphale and Crowley. And there are secrets awaiting notice: lily of the valley, first sprung in Eden, a symbol of hope and return to happiness; the possible origin of Aziraphale’s love for pears; Crowley amiably sheltering under the angel’s wing again.

Everything is soft and nothing hurts and I treasure the time I get to spend there.

GINGER HAOLE | @gingerhaole | Tumblr art tag | Good Omens Art Collection on AO3: Polaroids | Etsy Shop: gingerhaole

Start with the piece I’m never getting over: [CW: This kink is not everyone’s cup of tea. You may wish to preview the SFW Tumblr snippet and description first.] Sounding (Original Tumblr post) (Full image on AO3)

Even the SFW snippet gives me a heartrush. The long, accepting lines of Crowley’s body, the way he’s opened himself entirely to the pleasure being given to him, giving over control even to the point of allowing his halo to manifest.

In the full set of Sounding images, the depth of well-worn affection and tenderness between Aziraphale and Crowley, their reciprocally earned and returned trust absolutely shines. Aziraphale’s Botticelli hands fascinate; his intense concentration captivates. The contrast of a fully clothed Aziraphel reverently pleasuring an enthusiastically nude Crowley is beyond delicious. And Crowley’s trembling compliance enchants; his erotic exaltation thrills.

And the various nonbinary, genderfluid representations in the rest of the explicit Polaroids collection feel as genuine as the mindful, existential bond between the ineffable lovers. The same goes for the non-explicit artwork featuring them on Ginger’s Tumblr, too. Exquisite.

JASMINE TWIL | @jasminetwil | Tumblr Good Omens art tag | Etsy Shop: JasmineTwil

Start with the piece I’m never getting over: The first comic adventure of Aardvark!Crowley and Aziraphale (Original Tumblr post)

Playful, snarky, delightful comic-style fanart. There are details that callback to canon (like Crowley’s particular relationship to houseplants and Aziraphale’s tartan bowtie and camelhair coat), and others that exist purely for the joy of them (like Crowley’s demon tattoo appearing on the aardvark’s fur, and the UPC code on the plant pot — seriously, read the last 3 digits…).

Never underestimate the power and worth of laughter.

KHIROPTERA | @khiroptera | Tumblr art tag

Start with the piece I’m never getting over: making sure Crowley has lovely dreams about whatever he likes best (Original Tumblr post)

This is so meltingly soft and tender, I get all misty every time I see it. The deepening crepuscular colors, the scattered twinkles from stars Crowley likely hung himself, the smitten smile curving Aziraphale’s lips, the tender blush of sleep on Crowley’s cheeks give the scene a wonderfully dreamlike quality. I particularly adore this reminder of Aziraphale’s first act of service for Crowley: offering comfort and shelter under the curving expanse of angelic wings. In canon, Crowley’s acts of service tend to be fairly dramatic, increasingly overt gestures impelled by accretion of yearning and dire circumstance, so this homage to Aziraphale’s comparatively understated offerings is particularly sweet.

All the pieces in her portfolio make me squee, every time I revisit them. Truly, every single time. In fact, I was so inspired by her adorable Ineffable Husbands in scarves in the snow (Original Tumblr post), I ended up writing a vignette of ineffable fluff about it.

Postscript to the authors and artists mentioned here: If you would rather I present different links or other information, or if I have in any way mischaracterized your work, please tell me, so I can make corrections. While my words come from a place of love, it would be no kindness for me to gloss over mistakes or cause any of you discomfort. Thank you all. ♥

[importantlovecolor]

Zoids Saga Fuzors

Go to the Zoids Research Facility, and take the Core Active Ion Small from the left Chest, and the Hellcat Data from the right Chest. Go to the Item and Weapon Shop, and take the Emergency Retreat.

Zoids Saga

Zoids Saga Fuzors

Watch Zoids Fuzors

Zoids Saga Fuzors for Nintendo Gameboy Advance/GBA is a RPG game published by Tomy.

Game Boy Advance Zoids Saga: Fuzors. Tags: Zoids View.

Zoids Saga III: Fuzors (sometimes just 'Zoids Saga III' or 'Zoids Saga: Fuzors'), is set in the Zoids: Fuzors fictional world, and follows the actions of 'Will'. A good portion of the storyline parallels the Zoids: Fuzors anime. Similar to Zoids Saga there is one city (Blue City) which the player returns to after each segment of the story.

Zoids Saga

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Zoids Saga Fuzors Info:

Release Date: February 23, 2005 Genre : RPG Publisher: Tomy Region : USA Languages: English Platform : Gameboy Advance Rom Type: .GBA

Download Links: Size – (4MB) ———————————————————— Direct

For Extracting Rar Files Use WinRAR or 7zip

Notes:

Zoids Saga Fuzors

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Check the FAQ Page For Extract RAR (Multi) Parts Guide, Dont use comment.

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If the file is damaged or shows RAR CRC Error, re-download them.

Check our notes, faq page, instructions Properly before you ask for help on the comment section.

For File Missing/Dead Links –> Request for Reupload.

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Status:Eps Seen: / 26Your Score:Add Detailed Info

Alternative Titles

English: Zoids Fuzors

Information

Type:TV

Status: Finished Airing

Premiered:Fall 2004

Producers:Tokyo Kids

Studios: None found, add some

Genres:AdventureAdventure, MechaMecha, Sci-FiSci-Fi, ShounenShounen

Rating: PG-13 - Teens 13 or older

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Ranked: #61362

2 based on the top anime page. Please note that 'Not yet aired' and 'R18+' titles are excluded.

Members: 9,624

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26 of 26 episodes seen

slax(All reviews)

21 people found this review helpful

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Ok, I'm a big Zoids fan, and as such, this review focuses on the differences between the styles of this and the preceding series, rather than an more general overview (I won't use Genesis as an example since that is of a vastly different style). Unfortunately, it is very negative. Firstly, let me start with the Story: Fuzors basically has no story whatsoever for the vast majority of the series. In the final few episodes, a backstory gets fleshed out and some continuity established, but as this only happens very late-on, it feels more like a justification for why the series occurred in the way it did, rather than an actual plot that naturally developed. Furthermore, the story it does eventually manage to establish is rushed, this, along with the generally poor translations, makes it difficult to draw any praise from the story. Now, this brings me to draw parallels with Zoids Zero, which also had a very skimpy plot at best. However, the biggest difference with the two series is that Zero is built around battles and comedy, and as such tries to give the viewer fluid fights and funny lines rather than a deep plot. Fuzors does not, and as such has no excuse for the lack of story. To continue with the story theme, I'll next discuss the Characters: While Zoids shows are not renowned for their characters, the development of the cast is not handled well in Fuzors at all. For instance, in the first episode, the character 'Amy' walks in to Mach Storm's headquarters and appears to anger some of the main characters. What the show doesn't tell you is that Amy is actually a member of Mach Storm herself. This fact makes it very confusing (to say the least) when she shows up unannounced in later episodes. This is probably the best way of describing the problem with the characters in Fuzors, it simply assumes you know who/what everyone/thing is -rather than actually take the time introduce them. This is especially true for the Zoids themselves. Many of the Zoids, such as Arosaurers and Gorhecks are totally new Zoids that fans of the previous series would not know anything about -and yet they appear on screen without any kind of introduction at all. To make matters worse, old Zoids that fans would be familiar with from other series are changed abruptly and without reason. For example, the Blade Liger is depicted in the other series as a very rare (if not unique) Zoid. In the first episode of Fuzors, three of them are shown. Another prominent example is the Fuzors variant of Gunsniper, which are all customised to be the same as Leena's heavily modified (and thus unique) Zoid featured in Zero. No explanation for either of these is ever given. This kind of 'thrust the viewer into the show' serves to confuse new watchers and disenfranchise fans, and is a great detriment to the series. Toward the end of the series, some of the cast's backstory is explained, however this is done in a very rushed manner and fails to justify the terrible job done in the first three-quarters of the series. Next up is the artwork. Well, the most important aspect of a Zoids show is the Zoids themselves, so I'll start with them. The models are all done in 3D, but the style is different to the previous series. The models themselves are very detailed, and try to stick closely to the real toy range, with small things like feathers and antennae being included. While such attention to detail may sound good, this is actually a detriment, as it severs to clutter the screen with needless 'wriggly bits' that only serve to distract the viewer. Furthermore, the models are all done in a very bland color scheme, with everything appearing 'cloudy' and dull when compared to the crisp, bright, colors of the previous series. Compounding this is the fact that most of these included features are simply never used. For example, the Liger Zero Phoenix never fires the bomb or guns that it has on it's back, instead RD usually uses his claws to attack from a distance, which is a big departure from the realism the highly detailed models try to emulate. While this might be excusable if everything in the series were done in the same style of graphics, this is simply not the case. Bullets and explosions are done in conventional anime style and as such stick out like a sore thumb. They just do not blend at all with the Zoids they are fired from or hit. But the most noticeable feature of the animation is the movement of the Zoids. The Zoids move in a very awkward and robotic fashion. All of the Zoids featured are extremely rigid and inflexible, thus their movements seem entirely unnatural and unrealistic. This is especially prevalent when the Zoids 'fall over', wherein they appear to do a backflip on the spot rather than actually collapse or stagger. This is easily the biggest complaint I have with the series, especially when comparing with the extraordinarily fluid animations of Zero. The backgrounds are bland and uninteresting, with very little stand-out features, and as such, the only positive thing I have to say about Fuzor's artwork is the character's design. However, considering that the characters are very unimportant (as they are usually obscured from view inside Zoids) this is largely a moot point. Finally, is the sound. Almost all weapons have high-pitched sounds, regardless of what they are actually shooting. As any mech fan could well appreciate, it sounds a bit ridiculous when super-heavy artillery makes a 'pew' sound. Furthermore, RD's voice actor has a very high-pitched voice, as do most of the supporting cast (such as Sigma and Sweet). As the viewer's ears are bombarded constantly by all these high-pitched sounds, it honestly gets annoying. Other: Well, there is no section for this, but the quality of translation is very poor. The names of Zoids are often mispronounced or downright wrong. Overall: Quite simply Fuzors is a very poorly made anime when taken from the viewpoint of a Zoids fan. The animation is awkward, robotic and dull, the sound effects are annoying and inappropriate, the translations are poor and the story only picks up toward the end of the series, but this simply come along far too late to salvage the series.

26 of 26 episodes seen

sylvanelite(All reviews)

11 people found this review helpful

Overall1Story1Animation1Sound1Character1Enjoyment1

This might sound like a harsh thing to say, but this is one of the worst series I've ever seen. The plot is terrible, and the voice actors are outstandingly bad. The fights are poorly strung together and are terrible to look at. This series was cancelled from US airways for good reason. Although it does get better in the latter half, it's not enough to recover from the terrible first half.

26 of 26 episodes seen

Daniel_mugen25(All reviews)

7 people found this review helpful

Overall7Story7Animation7Sound6Character6Enjoyment7

Zoids fuzors, just like Zoids new century, have teams who uses Zoids to battle each other for entertainment purposes in my opinion. It has been a good series especially when their Zoids combine with each other. Unfortunately, the story is a bit cliche. Teams battling each other for no explained reason(I might have missed it in the series though). I have only watched the English dub so far and the voice actors are good. Animation is a bit different from previous Zoids series but then impressive when they combine. All in all, it was a good series.

[duhragonball]

Frieza for the character ask, please. I want to know if there's something you like!

Give me a character and I will answer:

Why I like them: I tend to divide all of Dragon Ball canon into two sections: the part that’s about Dragon Balls, and the part that’s about Super Saiyans, with DBZ Episode 66 as the dividing line.   And Frieza’s original run as the main villain (Episodes 44-120) straddles that line.  

He’s basically a bridge between those two themes.    He starts off as a villain gathering the Dragon Balls to extend his rule, much like Emperor Pilaf or Commander Red, but he’s so insanely powerful that it almost doesn’t matter if he makes his wish or not.    The only thing that gives him pause is the possibility of a Saiyan uprising, except there’s only a handful of them left in the universe, which means the only way they could threaten him would be if one of them suddenly became the strongest Saiyan in a millennium.

My favorite aspect of Dragon Ball is that it keeps raising the stakes.   Vegeta was presented as the ultimate threat, and then it turned out that his boss is the strongest guy in the universe.   And he’s treated accordingly.    It takes forever to defeat him, mostly because it’s a lot safer to sneak around and avoid the guy, and when a final confrontation happens, no one has the necessary power to finish him off.  

Somewhat understandably, a lot of fans think of him as the Final Boss of the Dragon Ball mythos.  Goku becomes a legendary warrior to defeat the strongest guy in the universe.   How do you top that?    A lot of fans think that it was a mistake to try, and I’m pretty sure that’s where a lot of this “Toiryama wanted to quit after the Frieza Saga” mythology came from.  What they’re really saying is: “I think Toriyama should have quit after the Frieza Saga, and I assume he agrees with me, because I respect him so much, which must mean someone forced him to continue.”

But I think that’s bunk, because Toriyama’s best work was built on Frieza’s vaporized corpse.    How can you keep a martial arts epic going when the hero is stronger than the strongest person in the universe?   Toriyama took that as a challenge.    The androids could be stronger than Frieza because they hadn’t been built yet when Frieza was riding high.   Cell and Trunks could be stronger than Frieza because they’re from the future.  The Supreme Kai and Dabura were stronger than Frieza, but they don’t count because they’re from other realms beyond the “normal” universe.   Majin Buu could be stronger than Frieza because he’s from the distant past.   He’s been hidden away in storage for so long that no one remembers him.    Same deal with Beerus literally sleeping through all of Dragon Ball and DBZ.    And guys like Jiren and Hit are from whole separate universes.   All Toriyama had to do was avoid introducing some ultra-powerful character who had been active during Frieza’s lifetime.     The only one that springs to mind if Cooler, although he admits in Movie 5 that Frieza had an edge over him throughout their rivalry.   

So I like Frieza for being that big milestone character.   Guys like Cell and Majin Buu wouldn’t work as well without a Frieza to set them up as extraordinary challengers.  

Why I don’t: The problem with Frieza is that his importance to the franchise has led to him becoming overrated.  He’s got this 70-episode run as the main villain, but he spends most of it sitting in that goofy chair and literally refusing to do anything, even while his soldiers keep messing up.   When he finally does take matters into his own hands, he holds back, apparently because he wants to torture his opponents as much as possible before finishing them.  

People give Goku a lot of shit for showing mercy to his enemies, but no one ever seems to notice how Frieza could have wiped out Goku a hundred times over and just... didn’t.    At least when Goku does it, you can say it’s because he’s too nice, but what’s Frieza’s excuse?  There’s a lot of big long chunks of the Frieza Saga where literally nothing happens because the good guys are too weak and Frieza’s in no particular hurry to end it.  

By contrast, you have villains like Buu, who really don’t waste time like that.    He started killing people and while he wasn’t in any particular hurry, he didn’t drag it out either.   In less than 48 hours, he destroyed the whole planet.   That’s service.   

I cannot stress enough how Cell is the superior villain compared to Frieza.  The only lull in his run was when he declared a truce to allow his enemies to prepare for the Cell Games, and they were free to attack him during that time if they wanted.    And there was a point to that.   Cell had no particular agenda, so he decided to arrange a rematch with the Earth’s fighters.  

But when Frieza wastes time, it’s for plot reasons.   He’s just really lazy and unmotivated, or maybe he’s just incompetent.    But the wider fandom sees this jackass and goes “RARRR BEST VILLIN 5EVAR!”  Nah, he sucks. 

Favorite episode (scene if movie):   For my money, the coolest thing Frieza did was when he came back as a cyborg.    He kept trying to declare victory in his fight with Goku on Namek, even after cutting himself in half, and then Namek explodes on him and he still won’t let it go.   His dad finds him and after a long convalescence he decides to go to Earth and fight Goku all over again.   

What makes it so awesome is that the cyborg parts are a silent testament to how monumentally stupid that idea is.   All this guy had going for him was his top spot on all the power level charts, and now he’s lost that and he has no idea how to get along without it.  

And this is why I hate the idea of bringing him back from the dead, because there’s nowhere left to take this character.    He lost on Namek, and Episode 119-120 was just his last-ditch effort to defy reality.    He doesn’t know how to survive in a world where he’s not the top dog, and he doesn’t survive, that’s the end of that story.    Bringing him back just repeats the lesson, only without the cool cyborg parts to remind us that this never works.

Favorite season/movie: I guess Frieza Saga by default.  It’s got some great moments in it, but it gets really thin in places. 

Favorite line: “Peace?  I... will... never... know peaaaace!”  Or words to that effect.   Whatever bluster he shouted at Goku when he tried to take that last shot at him before Namek exploded.

Favorite outfit: The cyborg look.

OTP: I guess he has the hots for Yamcha, so let’s go with that.

Brotp: Yeah, right.

Head Canon: Between the lore in the Bardock TV special and “Dragon Ball Minus”, I get the impression that Frieza is concerned with legends in general, not just the one about the Super Saiyan.    I say this because in “Father of Goku”, he sent Bardock’s crew to conquer Kanassa, and the only apparent reason for this was because of the rumors of their psychic abilities.   Frieza was likewise intrigued by the Namekian regeneration ability.    I think in at least one translation he expresses some envy of Nail’s power, implying that he would want to find some way to acquire it for himself. 

What I’m getting at is that Frieza’s so powerful that the only things he has to worry about are things that may not even exist.    The Kanassans were probably no threat to him, but he may have considered that they could be, so he wiped them out before it could come to that.   Or maybe his staff discovered a tale of the Kanassan planet being the source of their powers, so he decided he needed to control that planet before his enemies could use it against him.   

Same deal with the Saiyans.   in DB Minus, I got the impression that he’s got a whole team of researchers who check up on local folklore.   Maybe they do this everywhere he goes, and he uses this intel to decide which planets live or die.  

Unpopular opinion: Frieza’s main contribution to the Dragon Ball franchise was to provide useful genetic material for the creation of Cell, the true best villain.  

A wish:  Hit and Majin Buu kill his ass and Grand Zeno, Great Priest, and Shaggy Blanco all hold a press conference announcing that he’s dead forever and can never come back, no matter what.    He gets sent to the same turbo super hell they have in Supernatural.   

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen:  Please don’t do any team ups with old villains and have Cell take orders from Frieza.   That sucks and it shouldn’t happen.  

5 words to best describe them: Final form is a corpse.

My nickname for them: LOWARD FUREEZA.

[bigskydreaming]

I'm not sure if you got my request because i didn't had internet when i sent it, so i'll write it again xd Do you think Dick (and the batboys in general) are famouse like Bruce? Because in the comics there's not any clue about it, i've never seen anyone say something like "oh look! Its Dick Grayson!, y'know, Wayne's first ward/son And its a shame, because reporters would make such a hard life to all of them, it would maka a good narrative tool

Honestly, this is a prime example of that inconsistency I rant about, and also DC’s refusal to just COMMIT on even the most basic aspects of their universe like….uh…how many kids does Batman have. 

afhsahfklahsklfhal

Like, you would think that would meet the MINIMUM requirements of “shit you should probably have figured out and make sure everybody’s on the same page with” but DC’s like….nah, that’s not important.

So I mean…..I’m reasonably certain - like this is just my personal belief, but I’d put money on it being right, lol - but I think the primary reason there’s so little mention in the comics of how Bruce’s kids are viewed in the public eye/how much the public are aware of them (in the New 52, at least, as pre-Flashpoint there was a lot more plot around that kind of thing, especially back in the 80s and 90s)……

…is because 90% of the writers and editors have no clue either, and nobody wants to be the one to ask, and like, open that can of worms. I 100% think you could ask five different writers at DC which kids Bruce has OFFICIALLY adopted in this current continuity, and get five different answers, lol.

There’s been so much handwaving about Dick’s status ever since Spyral, and again - I think its because nobody bothered to think through the logistics of the Hypnos/global-mindwipe machine BEFORE writing it into the story, and then once it did occur to any of them to like….wonder just how specifically it worked, they were like, fuck it, better just be as vague as possible. So, according to Grayson, everyone Helena didn’t program into the exclusion list before the satellite was activated should have no recollection of Dick Grayson, which is why he was able to ‘go back to his old life’ and be Nightwing again, without worrying about his secret identity having been unmasked…..

But what does that mean for his official identity as adopted son or even just ward of billionaire Bruce Wayne? People can’t have NO memory of Dick Grayson and still remember that Bruce Wayne took in a kid named Dick Grayson. I mean, as far as I can tell, the overall consensus in the comics seems to be that after the satellite was activated, Dick just kinda started from scratch as ‘Dick Grayson’ like, he was free to be himself again, but it was like he was a blank slate/came out of nowhere as far as everyone else was concerned. But again, that means as far as anyone outside of their close circle of family and friends know….Dick Grayson is a non-entity to Bruce Wayne and the two have no history. 

Which I mean, is fairly shitty and you’d think if nothing else, there’d be massive story potential there for delving into Dick’s character and his relationship with Bruce and examining how he felt about ‘having his old life/identity back’….except with the caveat that as far as the world is concerned, his life and identity don’t and have never included his father.

Cut to DC: Naaaaaaaah.

But even WITH that, plot holes persist, and abound, because…..why didn’t the satellite erase the Court of Owls’ knowledge/memory of Dick? Even before Luthor gave Cobb those goggles and files to help him with bringing Ric into the fold, Cobb clearly was already stalking Ric and knew exactly who he was….the Court obviously already had that doctor in place while he was still in recovery…so, whoops. I mean, you could probably come up with an explanation about the Court, via their own tech and resources, having had some protections in place 24/7 that kept the satellite from affecting them even though they weren’t on guard for it specifically…..but again, Occam’s Razor….I feel like the real answer is DC just didn’t care enough to think things that far through. Especially since the average Bludhaven citizen, like Bea, at least didn’t seem totally blown away when Ric revealed to her that amnesia aside, he was supposedly some rich billionaire’s adopted kid….which again suggests that as far as the writers were thinking, people in general are familiar with the idea that Bruce Wayne has more than one kid.

Then you’ve got Jason’s whole situation, and to be honest….I really only have the vaguest idea what’s going on there, because reading Lobdell books is against my religion, and I am a devout and deeply spiritual person, as you all probably can tell. I mean, I know that there’s something going on where like, Jason had himself legally resurrected in the public eye and is openly referring to himself as Bruce Wayne’s formerly-assumed dead foster kid……but like, is that the official official word, or would other writers if you asked them say they’d been operating under the assumption Bruce had adopted Jason too at some point in the Rebirth timeline, or….idek, man.

I…..honestly don’t have the faintest fucking clue what to make of the many back-and-forth retcons about Tim and his parents and his official place in the Batfam/relationship with Bruce, and am actually slightly terrified of even trying to make sense of that clusterfuck of a Gordian knot, so my official stance on Tim is to just like….back sloooooowly away from the anthropomorphic-migraine-masquerading-as-a-backstory, without like….agitating it and accidentally setting off another multiverse Crisis birthed wholly from just that one all-consuming black hole of a retcon.

I mean, there’s a reason I basically just shoehorn all the kids’ official pre-Flashpoint family statuses into anything I write in Rebirth continuity, and that’s not just stubbornness and my refusal to play the “now this kid is adopted…now he’s not…now he is again….except he���s not….oh he’s adopted again…..oh wait now he’s not again" game. 

Its like. Also for the sake of my sanity and stuff.

(And also hahahahaha fuck you DC times infinity, every time you use the words “blood son,” or “real family” in a comic, or have one of Bruce’s other kids refer to Bruce as “your father” when talking to Damian, as if that’s not an utterly bizarre and roundabout way for any sibling to refer to their mutual parent and thus I j’ete REFUSE to acknowledge it as valid….ahem, anyway, my point is, every time they do that in a comic, I double down and headcanon Bruce throwing a random as fuck gala for literally no other purpose than to remind all of Gotham that he has half a dozen kids and they’re all better than everyone else’s. Ugh. Kill it. Kill the “blood son” nonsense with fire and lightning and also lots of stabbing maybe).

Anyway, that’s my official stance on DC’s stance on Damian in the books.

Then as far as Cass goes….ugh, her origins were pretty much utterly butchered by the New 52, which IMO has also failed to give us Cass and Bruce bonding and dynamics sufficient to Sate Mine Ire™, sooooooo…..I mean, my perception of the current canon is that Cassandra’s official status is “secret mystery foster child that nobody really knows about,” but because I do not care for that and there’s the whole not sufficiently sated ire thing I mentioned, I officially reject this canon and willfully replace it with pre-Flashpoint Bruce and Cass love and adoption. DC’s welcome to kiss my critically acclaimed hiney if I’m doing it wrong.

Which brings us last, but certainly not least, as its only this way because I go sequentially and Duke is still Shiny and New comparative to the others and will be until the next inevitable fostering/adoption/clone hi-jinks bumps him up the sequential ladder (except I randomly switched Damian and Cass around this time because LOOK I DONT MAKE THE RULES, THERE ARE NO RULES i hvea Adhd hiccup sob leavem e aloooone soooooob)…..

Duke’s official status, much like the rest of the Batkids, can be summed up as Honestly, I Really Don’t Have A Fucking Clue And Am Just Winging This Whole Thing.

I mean, there’s less inconsistency with him, due mostly to the fact that so few writers other than Snyder use him (boo, hiss, and not just because I hate having to give Snyder credit for stuff - look, I love his Duke, but I loathe how he writes Dami, its a thing, I just…don’t get me started). But what inconsistencies there are….well….they’re a bit glaring.

Basically one major storyline showed Duke as being an official foster kid/ward of Bruce’s and living out of the Manor with Bruce and Damian and occasionally Tim when he’s not off road-tripping around the multiverse….and then Batman and the Signal had Duke in the care of his uncle, who was stated to be his legal guardian and Duke was constantly sneaking out in order to meet Bruce in the special Signal-cave he built specifically for Duke to operate out of so he didn’t have to like, drive all the way out to the Manor to change just so he could then drive back into the city and patrol. And then Batman and the Outsiders just said fuck all that, here’s Duke and Cass hopping hemispheres with the Outsiders every other issue, so apparently nobody’s making unscheduled visits anywhere back in Gotham to make sure these two are where they’re legally assumed to be, which again, for the record is…..*error, source not found*

LOLOL and the really fun thing about this little back and forth is I’m pretty sure allllll these conflicting takes are all the work of the same writer. Like. GET ON YOUR OWN PAGE, DUDE.

Also, again I have to assume the “Can’t Be Bothered To Give A Shit, Or Maybe They’re All Just Really Bad At Logic” curse has struck again, because….uhhhh…..

….at no point anywhere in Duke’s stories have I seen Bruce or literally anyone else express concern about the fact that Duke living with Bruce as his official foster, like he definitely and clearly was at some point at least…..means that literally every single one of his We Are Robin friends who knows that he was taken in by the Batfam (and there’s several of them who know this)….like, by the transcendent properties of You Can’t Honestly Think They’re That Dumb, that’s a good five or six civilians out there who probably took all of five seconds to play connect the dots and figure out the Wayne family, having officially taken Duke in on paper…..is pretty likely the Batfamily.

I mean, I like all of Duke’s friends and would definitely headcanon/write them as all being trustworthy and able to keep this knowledge to themselves for Duke’s sake, if nothing else, but I mean, its pretty unprecedented for Bruce to out himself and all of his kids/allies by extension, to like, that many civilian teenagers all in one swoop….

…sooooooo, you’d think, AGAIN, logically, maybe, perhaps, this is the kind of thing that should be brought up in a narrative somewhere as a plot point worth delving into, y’know, just for shits and giggles and maybe a little bit of that whatchamacallit - oh right, character development, but.

Cut to DC: Naaaaaaah.

 *throws up hands and does the I Can’t Even Shuffle all the way home*

In conclusion:

DC is a mess. The official/public status of each and every Batkid is a mess. Except for Damian, the blood son, but we have that pencilled in on the schedule to be killed with fire and also stabbing, so he can get filed under ‘just a fucking mess’ with the rest of his siblings. Hashtag Solidarity.

I mean, I say just write or headcanon their official status however you damn well please, and it’ll STILL be more effort than I believe DC has put into organizing and staying consistent with all of this, and thus STILL make more sense than what we currently have to work with.

*Shrugs* If they don’t care enough to provide a clear canon blueprint to follow when mapping the Bat Family Tree, I can’t be bothered to care if the one I make up myself happens to contradict one single mention of one kid’s official status as claimed by one issue of one book.

Especially if it was written by Lobdell.

Jason’s just a foster son my ass. grumble mumble bitter vengeful swears and a pox on all DC’s houses. WHY DO YOU PEOPLE HATE ADOPTION SO MUCH, INQUIRING MINDS WANT TO KNOW AND ALSO FUCK YOU.

[randomliven]

WARNING LONG POST HEAVY SPOILERS

Episode4. Play back rewatch

*Open scene Montrose

*Drinking. Going through the memories of his mind

He drinks and still he remembers it all

*God Smites Eve

*2:12 "Give this to tic protect our family" GEORGE

*The Order of the ancient dawn

*You might be all Tic has left

*"Smells like Tulsa

*Bitcx better have my money

*Christina glides through cars

* Black arrow (nods it off)

*leti was ready

*Bitcx tried to walk in like she own the place

*the protection spell works 'akirum

She seemed impressed and snide

*your money (leti realizes where the money came from

**L: "You want something in this house. Something to. do with Atticus"

**Ct: "Dont let the men fool you into thinking its Always about them. "

**His blood may have power but thats only because itus spelled it that way. Hes Not Special. Not really

Christina is a Snitch

*"If he keeps operating like this hes going to get you killed "Again"

(she looks sincere) (im telling yall xtina did this before)

* "I dont want that. Or this house. I just want the orrery"

(To discover a world of first) (chritina dont lie withold yes)

You can get the Fuck up off my Porch

Call me

*Hippolyta calls her daddy... She has the Orrery

She smart as hell

*The new comic diana drawing..outta this universe

Moves and predicts the relative position of planets

*leti tells tic about tina paying for house

*Tic with holds information from leti

*knows tina used tic to kill father

tic was go kill her then just leave

Lil boy with Coke bottle glasses ( just like tic but not tic

*two sets of pages still exist

*the orrery is the key

(using the orrery to go into another world to find his pages)

Titus kept it hidden

*Casting spells to protect

*ask ya daddy " i dont want yall involved"

(Sound like his daddy when they saved him)

They in the back

Every time i tell you to do something yo do the opposite

*" how you kno its 34 lodges"

*"I cant help you kill yourself. You cant see this game she is setting up for you to play"

(Montrose and Christina have done this before.. I cant wait till the final. I need to kno)

*"Looking for answers you already have"

Boston

*"I know where to find that dame vault"

Christina plays hide and seek for the first time

Christina screaming "Im safe."

The police arrive for her to take her to ...

Lancaster

*She didnt mention leti being in the house specie or tic

Says convince "hyrum"

*she knows there is someone in the closet right away

*xtina says time machine

* " let "negros" move in..(vs niggers) cocky

Take my lodges

*did i miss your initiation into the order..

No cunts allowed

The silent fight

Let go. You told me to let go

Hyp suspicious

It so happens to be at a astrology museum

Tree

Ruby walks into Marshal fields

"Work like kobe just to shine like Russel"

Sees Tamara

"Yes yesterday"

"I applied on a whim"

Boston

Lights of the universe

Leti's face watching rose go with the guard

*"u kno y they call me tree"

"Shouldnt i already kno that since we fuc in highschool simore" rolls eye at that liar

True story: Harriet chariot

*MY MAMA NAMED THAT COMET

*Many artefacts Titus was giving in exchange for striping away everything they knew

(Stolen after killing, probably raping and enslaving the native people)

*tree hints at Montrose being gay to tic

Tic questions how mon knows the guard

The vault

*Christina pulls up goes around the gate

(William comes out 30seconds later, yes we kno the skin change happens in seconds seeing ruby change, BUT HOW IN THE HELL did xtina put on a whole suite down to the tie that quick)

Do they not kno william cuz then lancaster wouldnt have known it wasnt xtina when he dies.

She kick they ass

*William says i have a Date

Find a way to open it

Montrose finds the moonlight

How old is this museum

*"This is some journey to the center of the earth type shit"(name of book coke bottle kid in library was reading)

3tunnels

Ever the tide shall rise

Map of titus voyage's..

No telling Letitia fuc N lewis No

Dont help me

Yellow

*Based on adventure novels the tunnels should be based on the map.

*How you know he raided Diana

"I read a damn book

*1810 it was built

Established the sons of Adam 3yrs later

*Whats down the other tunnel?

The lantern being there

Ruby drowning her blues away to a half empty bar

Is copper considered a yellow

Voluptuousness

*I cant afford another one

Blues eyes got ya tab tonight

*A nod. A gulp

*"May i join you?" They dont sit

Keep my glass full"...

*Yall white boys dont come to the dark side for modesty (demanding woman

* i can buy my own drinks ( pride)

Take a bit more to impress me White Boy

*Never insult you to make you a kept woman

* promise me the world to lay with me

*a promise i can keep

(All she needs is the orrery & she literally can give Ruby Many worlds)

The way they look at Ruby

*20min of walking

Walking the plank

Tic brave

Tf me 1st

Learned how to lie

*juneteenth

* "FREEMEN WERE NEVER SLAVES"

She out there

Spider senses

Tic has training

Booby trap

Big fucking deal

The bored starts to disappear

Jump pop

Better catch me Boy. (I got ya kid)

Now they can run shuffle

Montrose knows the combination

Jessie owens

*The tide rising.. Less than an hr

Ruby "got there 1st, shoulda been me but i let Leti distract me"

They sat there all night

*"Whoes leti"

(i dont think Christina knew leti Nd Ruby were sisters before that moment based on willtinas expression

*"my half sister" (willtina Gulps (becoming a signature

* if i was in your skin i wouldnt even have to run"

*what to do about it?

William with them eyes.

*"Better stop looking at me like that, It Aint happening

White Boy"

I Put a Spell on You plays

Ruby want it

(Im more than sure this is Willtinas 1st time, also wonder if so as a woman. Possible leti was a virgin)

Willtina looked confused by the blood. Primal reaction

Ruby in control

William excited, whoa lip biting

The mark of Cain. Big Dic Energy

*" How you kno so much about the sons of adam?"

* george gave me the bylaws i burned it

My brother said protect the family. His dying wish

(Was to give Tic the book, but you cant tell Montrose what to do with his son)

Closing Pandoras box once Nd for good

You wont stop

*Leti finds the neighbors body who went missing

*Chicago to Boston 14hr drive

(They walk 20min to the plank maybe another 20 to yahima)

*sees elevator come down, looks familiar

*Epistien was apart of the order prob chasing the pages... He was missing an arm

This might get dangerous

*he was kidnapped. I Died.

*"not the center of the fucking universe"

Leti can swim too

*Fatherly advice

Ya mama was complicated too

*all that fussing is loving

*Epstein day look like he was missing an arm and like a drowned victim

I don't think Christina knew about the tunnels or at least she knew that she couldn't open them

Black folk dont watch bones come alive & just stare

*reaches. (Back the fuc up

* they have the same symbol on their stomach. The Regeneration spell

*yahima Woman man two spirit

*had no reason to distrust him

ALWAYS HUNGRY

*he killed them all (stole they shii) enslaved

Tic look like Will Smith as a fish in shark tail

*she dont know my spirit

Montrose Takes pages anyway (i think knowing booby trap)

. Grabs yama

*montrose drops the pages purposefully

Like damn leti. Grabbing for her

The kiss. The scream. The knockout

*how did they get back without woodie

*is that your dad's atlas

*devon county circled. Ardum reaper. Hyp makes a detour

*siren. Ill figure out how to help her talk

*"You were brave boy. Grew to be a good man spite me"

*he already had the plan

Damn montrose

[golden-van-fleet]

Your Song

Summary: Gwilym has loved you for a long time and will continue to.

Word Count: ~2.2k

A/N: Hi! I needed to write about Gwilym. I’m not sure about the format? Also on mobile for this one. Enjoy!

It’s a little bit funny, this feeling inside

I’m not one of those who can easily hide

Despite Gwilym being an actor, his fatal flaw was his inability to hide what was on his mind. The entire world knew how he felt about you, except for, well, you. It made his stomach turn, to see you with a man that wasn’t him, holding his hand, kissing his cheek, calling him “babe”. He hoped, wished, and prayed desperately to be that man.

I don’t have much money, but boy if I did

I’d buy a big house where we both could live

He knew you wanted a big house in the countryside. It’d been your dream for as long as either of you could remember. In fact, it was the first thing he bought with his paycheck from Bohemian Rhapsody. He’d be lying if he said he didn’t dream of the two of you living there like Allie and Noah in The Notebook. He didn’t want to buy your love, per se, but if he could afford what you wanted, he wanted to be able to spoil you. For only being your best friend, he treated you a hell of a lot better than that boyfriend of yours ever could. Any of them, really.

And it wasn’t lost on you. You’d lost a couple boyfriends because they felt they couldn’t compete with Gwilym, and they couldn’t. Gwilym was over the top for you and only for you. When he bought the house, you were stunned. He constantly had you over, one of the guest rooms unofficially becoming your room. You’d been by his side before the fame and the fortune, it was only fair in his eyes that you were still there after it.

If I was a sculptor, but then again, no

Or a man who makes potions in a traveling show

I know it’s not much but it’s the best I can do

My gift is my song and this one’s for you

Every performance he did as Brian May was with you in mind. Gwilym was willing to go to the ends of the earth to prove that he was worthy of your love, to prove to you that he was the one you needed. He knew, rationally, you never needed a man to be happy or to succeed. He also knew, selfishly, that he was the one for you. This was a man willing to bend over backwards for you at any given moment, knowing you would do the same.

And you can tell everybody that this is your song

It may be quite simple but now that it’s done

I hope you don’t mind,

I hope you don’t mind that I put down in words

How wonderful life is, now you’re in the world

The day you met was a day he’d never forget. Your eyes piercing back into his own, a stare that sent a delicious shiver down his spine. It wasn’t a malicious stare, it was one of amusement. You were working at a local coffee shop while finishing your bachelor’s degree around the same time Gwilym began filming one of many up and coming projects. He’d come in with an agenda, a man on a mission, but when his eyes met yours, he babbled like an infant. You were so kind, you didn’t make fun of him, you smiled a little and let him compose himself.

Ever since that day, he made a point to visit you at work, seated at one of the tables in the corner as long as he could be without disturbing you, your coworkers, or the other patrons. You found it sweet, and your heart ached to get to know him.

So you did. He’d been to your apartment more times than the members of your family had over the course of the next year. It was around that year mark Gwilym realized he couldn’t live without you. It was also around the time you’d started your string of terrible boyfriends.

Gwilym couldn’t thank you enough for changing his quality of life. You breathed a life into everything that he’d never been able to find. Life by your side was beautiful. You never let him dwell on the bad, and as hard as it could be to find the good sometimes, he always tried. If not for his sake, then for yours.

I sat on the roof, and kicked off the moss

Well, a few of the verses, well they’ve got me quite cross

He had to tell you. He couldn’t say it to your face, but he couldn’t not say it to your face. He wrote letter after letter, page after page, hoping that something, anything would encapsulate his feelings about you. Late night after late night, he failed to document exactly what he wanted to say. He didn’t want to plan out what he wanted to say, but he needed it to be everything he’d had on his mind for years.

When you showed up at his door during one of those late nights, he told himself as soon as he opened the door he’d tell you. What he didn’t expect was to see you sobbing, throwing yourself at him. He caught you before you could hit the floor, catching a glimpse of you before you buried your face into his shoulder. Your eyes were puffy and swollen with tears, your face red and stained with tear tracks. It absolutely broke his heart.

“He broke up with me,” you whimpered. “Almost two years, I thought I was going to marry this man, and then suddenly I’m not good enough?”

But if only you knew how good enough you were. Gwilym saw the sun rise and set within you. You were the very center of his universe. He couldn’t tell you now, you’d just had your heart broken. He could try, in vain, to tell you how wonderful he found you and about the total joy you brought to his life, but his dark secret would have to wait a little longer.

You climbed out onto the roof outside the guest room window, the full moon hanging bright above your head. There was a gentle, almost imperceptible breeze floating through the summer night. This was your favorite part of the house. It was your hideaway, wrapped around the back of the house with a full view of the river in the background. It felt as though time stood still when you were there. You found yourself lost in the peacefulness of it all until Gwilym squeezed himself through the window frame to sit with you.

“He thought you and I had something going on on the side. I told him that you were my best friend, that you always would be, that without you there is no me. And he was jealous.” You sniffled, the tears of sadness now transformed to tears of resentment. “But maybe he had a reason to be jealous. You’re all I need in my life.”

Gwilym was nothing short of stunned. That was the first time in his life that he was utterly lost for words.

“I- I can’t be your rebound, Y/N. I’ve loved you for far too long to let myself be who builds you up for someone else to tear back down. You mean too much to me for that.” He felt a tear slip down his cheek. His heart was on the line. As much as he wanted to be with you immediately, to hold you in his arms and never let go, he couldn’t. Not right now.

“I’m not saying I want to jump from him to you. But I did a lot of thinking on the drive over here. You’ve always been there for me. You’ve been this support, this rock, and I can’t help but feel I’ve taken it for granted. And for that, I’m so sorry. I know the way you look at me when I’m not looking because I look at you the same way. I always have. And maybe I was too afraid of ruining what we had built up so beautifully. Rome wasn’t built in a day, but they were laying bricks every hour, and that’s what we did. We’re still doing it. So if you’ll let me, I’d like to keep building it, I want to know that it’s not going to go away after tonight.”

He forced himself to look at you, your eyes burning with unshed tears. It would never go away. It couldn’t.

But the sun’s been quite kind while I wrote this song

It’s for people like you that keep it turned on

Over the course of the following months, your relationship bloomed into the blossom it was destined to be. The dark cloud that hung over Gwilym’s head had finally given way to the warm rays of the sun, and he embraced them fully. Loving you was diving head first into a pool that had no bottom. There was always a new depth to be reached, and when he thought he’d reached his capacity, there was always more.

You noticed the change, welcomed it, and encouraged it. Gwilym was finally back to the man he was when you first met. The man that you thought you were going to fall in love with. However, you’d hung that up when he brought over one of his girlfriends, unannounced, to your flat the night you were going to tell him how you felt. It crushed you, but you couldn’t tell him that. To know that now, it wouldn’t happen again, he was yours? It was heaven in and of itself.

So excuse me forgetting, but these things I do

You see I've forgotten if they're green or they're blue

Anyway the thing is what I really mean

Yours are the sweetest eyes I've ever seen

He had to ask you to marry him. He made up his mind before the two of you had even been together six months. It took half a lifetime, or so he thought, to get with you in the first place. Hell, you’d moved in together after two months together, what difference would it make?

He found himself in the same position he was years and years prior, back in that tiny coffee shop. Your eyes were focused intently on his, your smile kind and your hand relaxed in his. Gwilym was in his element, at home, alone, with you. And there, in the comfort of your shared bed, he was going to ask you to be his wife, and he couldn’t choke the words out. All he could do was present you with the ring first.

“Marry me. Please,” he added, softening what sounded like a demand.

“Easily,” you smiled, pulling his face towards yours and locking your lips into a breathless kiss. “I would marry you a million times over.”

He found himself in the same predicament when it came to your vows.

“I’m not usually one to forget what I’m saying before I say it, but you look so beautiful I can’t help myself,” he began, chuckling as he bashfully wiped away a tear. “I had this whole thing planned about how you were the one for me and I knew from the moment I met you, but even to this day you render me speechless. So forgive me if I cut this a bit short, but I’d really love to call you my wife sooner rather than later.”

And you can tell everybody this is your song

It may be quite simple, but now that it's done

I hope you don't mind, I hope you don't mind that I put down in words

How wonderful life is while you're in the world

When your daughter was born with your bright, beautiful eyes, Gwilym cried more than he ever thought he would. He was so gentle with her, so gentle with you… You couldn’t love him more if you tried.

Despite having your eyes, your daughter was Gwilym’s clone. She had her father wrapped around her tiny little finger from the first cry she let out the day she was born. Gwilym immediately switched into protective dad mode, refusing to let her go without a fight. Unless she was going to you, of course. But even that took a little convincing.

One night, about three weeks after she was born, Gwilym got up in the middle of the night to tend to her. He took the wailing newborn out of her bassinet in your bedroom to the rocking chair in what would be her nursery.

“Alright, love, it’s okay.” He’d done everything he could think of to soothe her and nothing was working, and the last thing he wanted to do was wake you. He unbuttoned the front of her onesie, placing the newborn over his heart. He’d been told to try skin to skin bonding whenever he could, and by some miracle, it calmed her down.

Gwilym didn’t realize he was humming until he started to sing lyrics to a song he didn’t realize he knew.

I hope you don't mind,

I hope you don't mind that I put down in words

How wonderful life is while you're in the world

Your song had had its share of wrong notes and tweaked lyrics. It conveyed a full spectrum of emotions, highlighting the ups and the downs that came with life and love. Your song was unique, and Gwilym was blessed to share it with you.

[kamari333]

How would Edges react if they meet? What would Edges say to each other(or give advice) if both worlds meet?

THIS REMINDS ME OF THAT ASK MEME I THOUGHT OF WAY BACK WHEN!!! XD

Resonance Underfell Papyrus: EdgeBurlesque Underfell Papyrus: Boss

because thats easier for me to read and write

WARNINGS for vulgar language, booze, and sad

Edge and Boss appeared in an empty room together, black for as far as the eyes could see, and no visible light source. However, they could see each other just fine, as well as the two comfortable chairs that had inexplicably been provided.

Edge was in his armor, his black and red and gold armor that he never really took off as the captain of the royal guard.

Boss was clad in jeans and a plain black button up shirt, over which was a leather biker jacket with spikes on the shoulders. He still had the same scarf, belt, and stiletto leather boots, although his heels were half the size of Edge’s.

Edge summoned a weapon, taking a stance of aggression against Boss. “WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU AND WHY DID YOU BRING ME HERE?!?!”

Boss crossed his arms, raising a brow ridge. “AS IF I AM THE REASON WE ARE HERE. PUT THAT THING AWAY BEFORE YOU HURT YOURSELF, DUMBASS.”

“WHO THE HELL ARE YOU CALLING A DUMBASS?!?!”

“THE DUMBASS WHO DREW A WEAPON FIRST WHEN THERE WAS NO FUCKING VIOLENT INTENT. YOU KNOW. THAT DUMBASS. WERE YOU RAISED IN A GOD DAMN BARN?!?! RUDE!”

Edge flushed a vivid crimson, whether from rage or embarrassment (or both) was hard to say. He scanned the void once more before crushing his magical construct in his hand, dispelling it in a shower of red sparks.

Boss nodded curtly before taking a seat in one of the chairs. “NOW SIT THE FUCK DOWN AND TELL ME THE LAST THING YOU REMEMBER BEFORE ENDING UP HERE.”

“WHY THE HELL SHOULD I TELL YOU ANYTHING?!?!” Edge snarled, refusing to sit.

“BECAUSE HOW THE FUCK ELSE ARE WE GOING TO FIGURE OUT HOW WE GOT HERE?! WHY DO YOU THINK?!?!” Boss rubbed his temporal with two fingers of one hand. “I NEED A DRINK.”

“BOOZE DOESNT JUST APPEAR ON COMMA-“ Edge started, only to stop when a coffee table appeared out of nowhere, and upon it, a six pack of fruity cocktail beers in tapered necked bottles. “WHAT THE FUCK-?!”

Boss smirked, snatching one up and inspecting it for tampering before popping it open and taking a long drink. “SEEMS WHATEVER POWER BROUGHT US HERE IS AT LEAST BEING HOSPITABLE. OR THIS IS A LUCID FEVER DREAM. IN EITHER CASE I NOW HAVE A DRINK.”

“THIS IS THE MOST RIDICULOUS THING I HAVE EVER-“ Edge stopped mid sentence once more. “DID YOU JUST- WAS THAT A PUN?!?!”

Boss smiked wider. “IF THIS IS JYST A DREAM, THERE IS NO POINT KEEPING IT BOTTLED UP.”

“OH MY FUCKING STARS YOU FUCKING DID WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!?!?!” Edge howled. “THIS IS A FUCKING NIGHTMARE!!”

“YOU KNOW, JOKES ARE MEANT TO LIFT ONES SPIRITS, BUT I GET THE FEELING MINE HAVE ONLY SOBERED YOU.”

Edge howled in outrage, which only had Boss howling with laughter. Edge sat down and swiped up one of the beers, downing it in one go. When he slammed the then empty bottle on the table, he only looked mildly less incensed. “THAT HAS GOT TO BE THE GIRLIEST FUCKING DRINK I HAVE EVER HAD.”

“THESE ARE DELICIOUS FUCK YOU.”

“WHO DO I HAVE TO KILL TO GET A REAL DRINK?!?!” Edge grumbled, only to perk up seconds later when a bottle of Spirytus Rektyfikowany appeared at his elbow. He snatched it and started taking shots.

Boss made a face. “IF YOU WANTED TO DRINK GASOLINE WHY NOT ASK FOR RUBBING ALCOHOL??”

“IF I CAN STILL TASTE IT AFTER THREE SHOTS IT ISNT STRONG ENOUGH.”

Boss watched for a few more drinks, only halfway through his own bottle. “SLOW THE FUCK DOWN BEFORE YOU KILL SOMEONE ELSES LIVER BY PROXY.”

“FUCK YOU!!” Edge snapped. “I HAD A SHIT FUCKING DAY AND THIS IS JUST THE SHIT CHERRY ON TOP OF IT ALL!!!” He was starting to slur his words already.

Boss finished his bottle before picking up a second one, tapping the glass idly as he sized his counterpart up. He considered his options carefully. Obviously this other him was a fucking mess, and while Boss was relatively certain he was just hallucinating, knowledge was power and the more he knew about the other the better he would understand his situation. “THEN PLEASE, DO GO ON. ENLIGHTEN ME AS TO YOUR PLIGHT.”

“YOU REALLY WANNA FUCKING KNOW?!?!” Edge snarled, before taking another swig. “FIRST MY FUCKING ASSHOLE BROTHER GOES MISSING FOR OVER A WEEK, THEN HE COMES BACK AND IS AN UTTER DICK, THEN HE DISAPPEARS AGAIN WITHOUT A GODDAMN WORD, THEN HE COMES BACK AND-“ He took another drink, expression flashing to guilt and then back to indignant fury. Boss clenched his fists, recognizing that guilt, although he hadn’t ever known it to quite that degree. It reminded Boss of the guilt he felt on his Bad Days.

“AND I FIND OUT HE IS JUST FUCKING AROUND WITH SPACETIME, PARTYING HIS ASS OFF WITH A BUNCH OF FREEXP FROM OTHER UNIVERSES, LIKE IT WOULD HAVE BEEN SO STARS DAMN HARD TO JUST FUCKING- FUCKIN’-“ Edge swayed in his seat. “AND- AND THEN, THEN HE STARTS UP ON FUCKIN’ MOVING LIKE HE FUCKING EXPECTS ME TO FUCKING LEAVE!!! LEAVE THE FUCKING FIREBALL, THE WEED, UNDYNE...”

Boss leaned over the table, gently prying the bottle out of Edge’s hand. He knew too well when a monster had had enough and Edge was well beyond the line.

“AND THEN HE HAD THE FUCKING BALLS TO USE A NET ON ME!!!” Edge continued, spitting with indignation. “AND STUFF ME IN A GODDAMN BAG!!! DROPPED ME IN THE MIDDLE OF ONLY FUCK KNOWS WHERE, THANK FUCK THE ASHTRAY COULD BE BULLIED INTO SUBMISSION, THANK FUCK THE SLUT COULD SEE SENSE!!! HE ALMOST-“ Edge hiccuped a bit, a dull glow pooling on his socket rims. “ALMOST... AND F-“ Edge started jabbing a finger in Boss’s general direction. “FUCK YOU!!! FUCK YOU IT AINT NONE OF YUR STARS DAMNED BUSINESS YOU FUCKING- FUCKING-“ He faltered, fumbling for a proper insult. “...NOT ME!!!”

Boss corked the bottle and set it under the table. “CLEARLY NOT, BUT I THINK I WILL MAKE IT MY BUSINESS ANYWAY. LOOK AT YOURSELF. YOU’RE DRUNK OUT OF YOUR MIND.”

“FUCK YOU!!”

Boss rubbed his teeth, trying to figure out if this was more funny or sad. He decided ‘sad’ was the correct answer. “I AM SURE WHATEVER YOUR ISSUES WITH YOUR BROTHER ARE CAN BE RESOLVED BY TALKING TO HIM. FOR FUCKS SAKE.”

Edge’s entire body froze, then seem to spasm. He gripped his patella like he was trying to crush them. His voice cracked. “WHY THE FUCK DO ALL OF YOU MULTIVERSE BITCH ASS CUNT SUCKING NUT SNIFFERS KEEP SAYING THAT?!?! DONT YOU FUCKING GET IT?!?! HE WONT... HE WONT TALK TO ME.” A single bead of moisture slid down his maxilla from his eye socket to glisten on one of his fangs.

Boss had just enough time to think ‘oh fuck me’ before Edge curled in on himself, doubled over to hide his face despite his shoulders clearly shaking. Boss sighed, rising to his feet to move over and sit on the arm of Edge’s chair. He paused a moment, tolet the other acclimate to his presence before placing a gloved hand on Edge’s skull and rubbing soothingly, an action he’d had to do for his brother once too often (and had had done to himself more than he could remember). It was a common thing, this simple act of kindness and compassion, the barest minimum they had been able to consistently provide each other while underground.

Given how Edge’s breath hitched and his shaking only increased, it was a luxury he had not been afforded.

Boss kept it up until Edge passed out, wondering what the hell Edge’s brother was thinking, and if his own brother would be able to set him straight.

Assuming he was wrong about the picture he had built in his head about their relationship, or, better yet, that this was just a sick nightmare. Boss kept one hand steady on Edge, but used the other to pick up his second beer and drain it. He decided he deserved a bit after all that.

[yeastofeden]

Hello! Your Traitor Uraraka theory was an amazing read! I want to dive into the world of character/story/literary analysis too, but I dont know where or how to start... Any advice/tips you could share?

Thanks so much! I’m honestly flattered you would ask… I’m ahobby writer so a lot of what I know about analysis is what I learnedin grade school, on my own, or adapted from what I know about artcriticism & analysis….. Since you’re not sure on the start,I’ll just talk about all the core things I feel helped me getinterested in this.

Read If I had torecommend anything specificfor reading, I’d say lookinto classic literature – not because its “critically acclaimed,”but because a lot of the time classic literature has been analyzed byprofessionals in their fields, so it can be a nice way to see howother people handle character interpretation, storytelling, worldbuilding, and so on. I liked Shakespeare a lot, and you probablywouldn’t be surprised to hear that people analyze the shit out ofShakespeare. I probably picked up the most of my understanding ofcharacter analysis from indulging in Shakespeare alone.

Don’t like Shakespeare? I’d say look into stories that are just over 50 years old; Lord ofthe Rings, Catcher in the Rye, Pride & Prejudice, Lord of theFlies…. So long as you can find actual scholars analyzing it,you’re golden. Read things you enjoy; if you like anime and only care about that…maybe check out textbooks on classic anime.

Alongwith looking up how others analyze, start being critical with all themedia you consume. Movies are a great way to do this because it’sshort format and easyconcumption. You can stayfocused on critical thinking for a couple of hours while enjoyingsomething–I also think movie reviews are a good way to experiencecritical analysis. And don’t just watch good movies… watch badones too, and figure out why they’re bad.

WriteActuallywrite. Take all the interesting things you learned and apply it tosomething. Don’t just think about it; the tragedy about onlythinking is that nothing really solidifies like it does once youfinally put it out there. Talkto friends about it if you can drag them into aconversation;a lot of my analysis started out because I was talking with otherpeople. If you don’t have anyone to talk to about a series or don’twant to bother people with your miscellaneous thoughts, get a sidetumblr or a dreamwidth and just write things there to get themdown–ifyou’reshy, just don’t tag things.Tbh, sometimes I just write things out and then delete them when I’mfinished just so I can get the thought out of me. Writing is just apowerful tool tohelp organize thoughts into cohesive opinions.

Butdon’t just write thoughts only… build on them. Write your owncharacters and stories just for fun. Write fanfiction. WriteAlternate Universes. Really just explore your own taste in fictionand the kind of things you yourself want to see. If there’s onevery easy thing I could suggest… take your favourite characters orship and slap them into story that already exists. I wrote one of myOTPs a few years ago into HasChristian Andersen’s theLittle Mermaid,andit was interesting andfuntrying to suit different characters into the roles of the story.

Writingand reading as a combination are just good things for you; they helpbuild competency with literature and language, andby just indulging in the two of these while remaining critical canjust naturally better your ability to read deeper into things.

ResearchAlongwith the earlier mentioned analyses that you should look into, it’sworth it to look into like extra resources. Check out interviews withyour favourite authors; look at like Ted Talks about creativity andwriting; read into tropes and motifs; find creative people you likeand follow their work and look for trends; lookinto writing concepts and themes.Storiesare just made up of patterns and once you start finding the patterns,you can start exploiting them. A Hero’s Journey is one of the mostfundamental patterns we can follow in storytelling, and with someabstract thinking we can start to predict the events that will occurin a story. A lot of my theory is built up on observing patterns.

IfI could point you toward one single video, it’s Kirby Ferguson’sTED talk “Embrace the Remix.” It talks about the idea thatnothing is original and all things are just remixed versions of eachother. This is part of why tropes exist;  you could go look attvtropes.org and hit random and start learning about these patternsright now. Granted, I don’t recommend using tropes as a foundationof an argument, but knowing tropes can help you connect the dotsbetween series.

IfI had to suggest any non-literary research that’s worth lookinginto….Check out psychology, art, and/or culture. Psychology is just morepatterns, I use Maslow’s Heirarchy of Needs when I write andobserve survival horror. Art is another way to tell a story and isespecially useful when observing visual media. Culture can help youunderstand why people write the way they do, becausethere is a difference between Eastern and Western media andstorytelling trends.

“Personality sections”Alittle back story on me: pretty much all of thereading/writing/researching I do thesedaysis because I do a lot of text-based roleplay on Dreamwidth. I’vebeen doing this for about8 years.Overthe years, I’ve written out easilyover 30 “personality sections,” which are basically 500-2kcharacter summaries–for characters like Sakura from Naruto, Makotofrom Free, Jake English from Homestuck, and so many others–as apart of a way to “prove” that I understand the character I’mroleplaying whenjoining organized groups.I’ve also read literallyhundredsof these personality sections because I joined vetting teams forsaid organized groups, and have written many rejectionresponses to help people understand where they can improve.A lot of people I know hate writingthese personality sections… but I love them.

Youcould join RP and get a feel for it thesame wayI did, but that might not be your thing. But the process of writingthese “personality sections” wasbroken down to a science byroleplayers,and can be seen as a base form of character analysis. Wetalkedabout a character’s personality, what shaped them to be that way,and sometimes how that affected them in the future of their story.When I led a vetting team, these were the requirements I set:

Mustbe at least three paragraphs long for minor characters, fiveparagraphs long for main characters. Players should be able to conveya good understanding of their characters, but just describing apersonality isn’t enough. Make sure that when you explain aparticular attitude that you back yourself up with some canon proof,otherwise mods have to wonder where you are getting this informationregardless of our knowledge of canon. Be sure to explain clearly andconcisely, organizing your paragraphs so related subjects aretogether. Avoid explaining the personality in such a way that itreads like a history section - generally this is determined byunnecessary use of chronological order.

Andthese are the same guidelines I hold myself to when I work on my ownpersonality sections. Some people have broken down personalitysections in such a way that they are formatted “three positivetraits, three negative traits” withsome variance.Some like to talk about important relationships aswell.I always defend that personality should be backed up with actualcanon evidence. “Uraraka is kind,” I could say, but I should backit up with an instance where she showed kindness, such as when shesaved Midoriya from tripping when they first meet.

TheorizingIfI’m honest, I don’t much like theorizing. I like to read theoriesand I like to think about things, but I’m not actually partial totrying to predict the future of a series because I feel likeserialized stories are too choppy to be worth my time, and there’snot much sense trying to predict the future of a story that’sfinished. I’m more inclined toward theorizing about the past, orwhat’s already happened but wasn’t explained.

Mydisinterest in theorizing kind of shows….I’ve only written twotheories for Tumblr–Urarakais the Traitor (My Hero Academia), and Both Shiros are the Clone(Voltron). I think I ended up being right about the second one butI’m not sure where the interview isthatproves it, justthat it was SDCC stuff.Thereason I’ve written any theories at all is because I personally wasmotivated by frustration–I didn’t know why people weren’ttalking about these things. SoI made a post to try to get people to talk. BeforeI posted my theory, no one would have looked twice at Uraraka andthat drove me nuts.Now I’ve made a following strong enough that Uraraka seems to beone of the highest contenders in terms of just… gossip. Which,thanks guys. I’m floored.

So…. Myadvice would be to pick a subject you think should be talked aboutand go for it. Do the research. Canon-review. Takenotes. Search for patterns outside what you’re trying to analyze.Writeand rewrite and rewrite again, becauseanalyzing is basically high school but fun.

And…lastly…. Prepare to be wrong. You have a different sense ofstorytelling than anyone else. I have been bitten right in the assbecause I viewed and loved many-a character because I saw them theway I wanted to, and the author clearly did not share my views.And people might not like your theory; people might super hate iteven, and that’s not such a big deal. In the end it’s just fiction and we’re all just here to enjoy a story we love.

I…know that’s a lot, but Ihope it was at least helpful information! Ithink in the end the most important part is just to be critical andremain open-minded. Never stop learning. Choose your battles. Write about what you love.And don’t worry so much about being wrong. 

[coolgirl]

Fic recs masterpost

ok so i used to have a lot of fics masterposts on my old blog and people keep asking for recs + i wont be able to upddate them or anything anymore so i decided to just move them all to this blog

under the cut: AUS / arkham knight / jaykyle / jayroy / robin!jason / gen / angst fics 

*: last added (april 4) //   for some reason the links arent working so go to jasontodd.tumblr.com/ficrecs for the links, sorry!

AUS

The Virtue of Revenge | young justice au with jason as red x making his own team with roy, starfire, raven, and others. i love it, even if it has shaky moments and stuff pls give it a chance.

crystal silence creeping down | young justice/lost days au

Flicker from View | another young justice au

Live to Rise | yes. you guessed it. young justice au.

Collide &  Convergence | au where post crisis jason goes to the young justice universe

The Changeling Sequence | series where jason meets damian before he went to gotham. The last part is a wip that i doubt will ever get updated again, so uh be careful. read only the first or second part and forget about the third.

The Drag of Fate | au where jason is lady shiva’s son as well. Part of a series, which i also highly recommend but idk if they would be au as well

heavy on the heart | another jason and cass are bio siblings. A+.

Didymous | cass and jason are twins.

repairing the world | i dont know how to explain this series.. its an au and really really good. Jason doesn’t appear in all the pieces.

just go  | jayroy, wings au

In the Shadows (of Who We Used to Be) | jayroy, black widow & hawkeye au

The Family (or how Jason Todd was adopted by the Avengers) | marvel crossover

bad boys bad boys (whatcha gonna dooo) ♫ | jason is damian’s batman. iconic fic imo.

Rise (And Try Not to Fall) | star wars au

A Bird in Morning | bruce finds jason when he’s at the hospital after crawling out of his grave

Moment Between | ghost jason & ghost martha and thomas wayne

We’re not in Crime Alley Anymore | au where jason was younger when bruce took him (and he didnt become robin)

Perhaps The World Ends Here | marvel crossover, future jaykyle

Batten Down the Hatches | a few different aus here. young justice + helena wayne

My Brother's Keeper | jason & damian knew each other from before + damian arrives to gotham just for jason

When the Moon Found the Sun | main story is clark/bruce but it’s preetty cute. soulmates au.

Between the Light and the Dark* | damian & jason uuhm i cant remember what this one was about per se bc im reading like 5487 similar fics but yeah

Two Dead Birds  | time travel stuff

Red Blood, Blue Blood | jason (and the rest of the batkids) are bruce’s biological kids, yeah i wasnt a big fan of the premise at first either but its gud

Rebirth | talia & jason, mind the warnings

you belong among the wildflowers | kate n renee adopt jason instead of bruce

We're the warriors of tomorrow |  Cass, Jason and Damian meet while with the League of Shadows

Can You Hear Me?  | ghost jason

to death's other kingdom I will not go  | bruce makes it on time au

The Ties That Bind  |  The pit restores Jason's body but not his mind, Ra's makes him one of his assassins and Talia adopts him as her own.

death’s outlet song of life* | the gordons find jason before the events of lost days

reflections on shattered mirrors.* | talia & jason stuff

Come Alive* | young justice s3 based

A Path Upon The Ground* | au from lost days, eddie and jason meet again

ARKHAM VERSE

If He Had Come & the sequel  Desiderium | au where bruce rescued jason before he could become the arkham knight.

the roads we know

this gun needs no bullets

JASON & BRUCE CENTRIC (not romantic)

Quack | this one is so crackish but so so cute i love it, robin jason

If He Had Come & sequel Desiderium  | arkham knight verse and its so good and has a lot of bruce & jason feels

Neverland /  Keep Lying To Me | deaged/ little jason from another universe.. sad and cute

Icarus and Bubble Gum | fluff, robin jason

Knock On Death’s Door | bit of both but not so so so angst, red hood jason

dead and dying things | au

In Memoriam | angst, trying to fix their relationship, red hood jason

If the Fates Allow | angst, red hood jason

The D-Word | fluff kind of.. red hood jason

This Place We Built With Grace and Guilt | angst angst angst, red hood jason

I Love You | robin jason, fluff

Wayward Birds | fluff and angst, robin jason

yesterday’s gone, yeah it went away (i’ve been lost but i’m here today) | another trying to fix their relationship fic, its cute and sad

We’re not in Crime Alley Anymore | au where jason was younger when bruce took him (and he didnt become robin)

Little Absences | sad, robin & red hood

Schrödinger's Honest Man | sad, drugs tw, absolute fave

White Christmas | bruce & robin!jason

Frozen History | de-age

Stargazer | jason n bruce patching their relationship.. its iconic

Unconventional Family Reunions | bvs setting

Prompt: Trapped | mind the warnings

Safe In My Arms 

The Failures of Reverse Engineering  | ghhm not really bruce & jason maybe?

to death's other kingdom I will not go | bruce saves jason au

points of impact  | glass case get fucked

is it my fault? (we've been missing each other)*

waiting for you. *

The Little Things*

World's Finest* | my uwus my uwus have fallen everywhere

JAYKYLE (all iconic)

In Which Kyle Confesses The Same Thing Six Times

milk and honey

Batman vs Space Bureaucracy

deadlock

attention to detail

tempest in a teapot

violet tendencies

no love, no glory (no hero in his skies)

keep the door open for me

waffles and war 

The Art of Subtlety (jason lives au)

Perhaps The World Ends Here | marvel crossover, future jaykyle

Riding in Batcars with Boys

boy, you fill my lungs with sweetness

no chance, no way, i won't say it (no, no)  

a change in the atmosphere

invitation to commitment

Overexposed 

i deserve that, don't i, some sort of blazing love that i can live with 

i won't say 

The water is always warmest at dawn

JAYROY (all iconic too)

sleepless 

Countdown

just go (wings au)

Unspoken

(for thy love is) better than wine (E)

Rooftops

Dick Wolf is a Really Funny Name

A headache isn’t always a bad thing

sad eyes, bad guys, mouth full of white lies [high school au]

kairosclerosis 

The Night They Met 

march down an empty street (like a ship into the storm) *

Archange de la mort (rallume ton flambeau) * | hic warning lol

this time, the loser wins | steph & jason centric though

So Baby Come Light Me Up *

Little Talks *

All the light is never ending, much like you and I; *

Don't let me go, for I feel I may fall * | soulmates au

Something Reckless * 

OTHERS

how to make a home. * | some eddie/jason if you squint, rose/eddie/jason team up

This Car Ain't Big Enough For The Both Of Us* | could be read as jayconnor :3

Robin/young!Jason

The Art of Subtlety | jason lives au, jaykyle

Little Absences | sad, robin & red hood

I Love You | robin jason, fluff

Wayward Birds | fluff and angst, robin jason

Icarus and Bubble Gum | fluff, robin jason

Quack | this one is so crackish but so so cute i love it, robin jason

we were not tragedies | jason & babs, read warnings

Heavy Home | gen, alfred & jason

Good News (No One Mourns the Wicked) | Jason & steph & damian. harold they’re dead (kinda robin!jason??)

Love Yourself (So No One Has To) | good amazing au with some selina & jason (not really.. robin but it starts as robin!jason i guess?)

Moment Between | ghost jason & ghost martha and thomas wayne

We’re not in Crime Alley Anymore | au where jason was younger when bruce took him (and he didnt become robin)

Tired &  Laundry | kinda au, read tw!

Smoke | jason & jim gordon

White Christmas | bruce & robin!jason

is it my fault? (we've been missing each other)* | mix of present and past jason

Sidekick* 

waiting for you.* | technically baby jason

The Little Things*

World's Finest* | oh this one.. my uwus

GEN

hold on to what  we are, hold on to your heart | gen, Barbara & Jason friendship. Some dinahbabs & jayroy

gotta give the boy points | gen, absolute fave

Strangers in Nothing but Name | marvel crossover, side steve/bucky

If He Had Come |  Desiderium | Arkham Verse, gen

I can’t  think up a good  name for this | young justice verse, gen apart from canon relationships

A Better Thesis | gen, p short but i loved it

The  F-Word | gen, batboys being batboys

until i’m in my grave | gen, wip 

Robins United | gen, batkids bonding, except for cass, thats my only complaint

Free of Dogma | gen, canon divergence, marvel crossover w Jason & Bucky

bad boys bad boys (whatcha gonna dooo) ♫ | au where damian is jasons robin and not dick’s, obviously damian & jason brotp. 

Heavy Home | gen, alfred & jason

In the  Shadow of Two Gunmen | gen, Marvel crossover

Flicker from View | side Barbara/Dick, young justice verse

I Love You | gen, Bruce & Jason

how to  hide a stray resurrected superhero from your parents/parental figure | au, jason & tim friendship kinda

One For The Road | Jason/Roy/Koriand’r but its SO cute

Baby,  It’s Cold Outside | gen, Dick & Jason

The  (Family) Doctor’s  Appointment | gen, batboys bonding

The Family (or how Jason Todd was adopted by the Avengers) | marvel crossover, gen

Reason | wip, gen, canon divergence

Soliloquy | gen, tim & Jason brotp,  and really cute batfam moments

Red As The Shadow Of Death | gen, young justice/under the red hood verse

Give Yourself a Chance | gen, duke & Jason & leslie brotpish

homecoming | outlaws brotp fic, could be considered shippy if you want to

And I Said What About Breakfast at Tiffany’s | jason & steph

Of Bats and the Forsaken | jason & all the batkids, side steph/cass and jay/roy if you squint

this is a long drive (for three robins who don’t agree on much) | no capes au, steph & jason & damian, background tim/tam

The Dying of the Light | marvel crossover, bucky & jason, canon divergence

Cat | selina &  jason, catlad au

Killing for Love | cass & jason, au  where jason was lady shivas son  

Keep Lying To Me | de-aged au, just heartbreaking imo, cursed fic

The Social Habits of Robin | gen, batboys. Where_is_cass.jpg tho

Steph and Jay’s Excellent Adventures | series, Steph & Jason

Neverland | jason & batkids, young!jay travels to the future. sad asad sad

on a thin chain of moments and something like faith | gen, jason & cass & steph mostly. really good

Good News (No One Mourns the Wicked) | Jason & steph & damian. harold they’re dead

In a Parallel Life | batboys focused, it has amazing dialogue, dynamics, and characterization. It’s only missing Cass and the rest of the girls.

repairing the world | series, not everything is about the batfam.

Born to Run (Born to Rise) | Jason & Talia having a mother/son relationship reblog if you agree

Live to Rise | it updated again p recently so yay! young justice verse

To Save a Dying City  | jason + other people

Let’s Have Some Fun This Beat Is Sick | mostly damian centric

Movie Night: The Mummy  | read trigger warnings, batboys

The Trading Chain  | not jason centric, but it has cass being older than jason and calling him “little brother” so noice

we sure know how to run free  | jason & cass

Yesterday’s Voices | bruce loses his memory au

Nests and Cages series | read trigger warnings

Roots | barbara centric, really good plot and characterization

Love Yourself (So No One Has To) | good amazing au with selina & jason

Retrograde Motion | de aged jason au

Provenance | mostly roy centric, bruce fucks oliver’s life for what he did to roy. iconic

Schrödinger's Honest Man | sad, drugs tw, absolute fave 

Batten Down the Hatches | a few different aus here. young justice + helena wayne

My Brother's Keeper | jason & damian knew each other from before + damian arrives to gotham just for jason

White Christmas | bruce & robin!jason

until i'm in my grave v2 | this one is already mentioned in this post BUUUT the writer started rewriting it so!

Frozen History | de-age

Stargazer | jason n bruce patching their relationship.. its iconic

show me yesterday, for i can’t find today | time travel au

Warm Enough | alfred & jay fluff

Parallels | mia & jason team up

Legacy | reverse robins, not jason centric but hes there alright.. i think.. i cant remember :D

What are the words I'm forbidden to say?* | damian & jay fluff

Cracked Foundation| jason n damian

Cat's Cradle  | more jason n damian

spaces in between  | damian & jason again

When the lights go out  | damian & jason, theres a pattern here

in my head, i do everything right | some jason & steph

is it my fault? (we've been missing each other)* | past & future jason

life, if well lived* | jason travels back in time and meets martha & thomas wayne

In Charge * | babie jason

Pyrrhic victory* | jason & damian stuff

Twists and Turns* | more jason & damian bonding

Of Brothers and Batcows* | guess what.. yes! more jason & damian

This Car Ain't Big Enough For The Both Of Us* | jason & connor.. say no more!

First Gear* | back to jason & damian please read this.. damian tries to teach jason to drive

changing, falling, fading (please watch over me)* | jason bonds with damian & steph

ANGST

Through the Valley of the Shadow of Death [read the trigger warnings!!]

in the repairing the world series there are a lot of fics dealing with jason, tho Warm Enough ugh not all are centered around him. I would say read  Escalation | Coup de Grâce |  Interlude for the rh!jason arc, and  Tired &  Laundry for robin!jason. [also read trigger warnings]

Countdown | jason/roy]

those six days [trigger warnings again!!!]

Call | angst

the tune without the words  | kind of character study from jim gordon’s pov

Unspoken | jason/roy, really angsty if you remember how red hood arsenal ended

If He Had Come & Desiderium | arkham knight verse, read trigger warnings!

Reason | on hiatus :/

hold on to what we are, hold on to your heart   | this is my favorite ever.. read trigger warnings

Heavy Home | alfred & jason

until i’m in my grave [trigger warnings!]

Keeping Broken Pieces Together

Monsters | marvel crossover

gotta give the boy points | this one please!!!! another fav. read trigger warnings

The weight of it [trigger warnings!]

Live to Rise | young justice verse

Neverland | THIS ONE IS PURE ANGST!!! please its so sad..

Keep Lying To Me | this one has some angsty scenes too im sad emoji

hangman is coming down from the gallows  | some angst

Movie Night: The Mummy  | read trigger warnings, batboys

Love Yourself (So No One Has To)

All in the Blood [read trigger warnings]

Little Absences

Stargazer | jason n bruce patching their relationship.. its iconic

Rebirth * | mind the warnings and its really. sad.

The Failures of Reverse Engineering *

Eternal Soliloquy * | sad sad

throw me a lifeline (I might even catch it) *

changing, falling, fading (please watch over me) * | jason & steph & dami angst

[lilietsblog]

LETS GO MIRAI NIKKI LIVEBLOG THIS TIME HOPEFULLY WITH SCREENSHOTS

(update: nope didnt work. guess i do have to save the pics separately and not just copy-paste them into an rtf o well)

last time on: is Gasai trying to kill them??? i have no idea last time she was onscreen they (she and Yukki) were drinking soda from the vending machine????

I LOVE AKISE AND HIS FACIAL EXPRESSIONS SO MUCH like theres the normal guy freaking out and then theres this beautiful white haired disaster

meanwhile I think Yuno is??? roleplaying??? like she counts on him being non-responsive to play out her fantasy of being a caring housewife? anyway yeah she's done this offscreen huh. that was a jarring transition

AND SUDDENLY OPENING its somehow SUDDEN every time and I admire that man I love this opening so much and I cant take a single screenshot reflecting how awesome it is because the entire Thing is constant movement so hey Akise whatcha thinking man I love just the CONTRAST Akise:

Other people:

what is it with me and characters who never show their emotions on their face or in their voice but act exclusively based on them??? like theres this very specific anime trope of a white haired character who is stoic as fuck but instead of making rational decisions motivated by human people logic they do 100% self-destructive things based on curiosity / love / sense of duty / whatever the fuck else and in the end they appear to be missing precisely one emotion and that's self-preservation (yes self preservation is totally an emotion look it up) Akise is that exact trope and I LOVE IT SO FUCKING MUCH meanwhile, Yuno is having trouble feeding an unconscious prisoner... what an unexpected problem that could in no way be foreseen. let me guess: she's going to try to wake him up so he can swallow his damn katsudon ah no instead Hinata intervenes. hon SHE BEAT HIM UP AND TIED HIM TO A CHAIR HOW MUCH DO YOU THINK SHE CARES IF HE WANTS KATSUDON. what made you think speaking up was a good idea here

theres a meme of 'ask someone whos not in the fandom to interpret whats going on in this picture' but you know i think random ppl would identify this situation 100% correctly +- who Hinata is to Yukki. this anime is a cultural icon "Aren't you Yukiteru's girlfriend? Can't you tell?" I love the moon logic this anime operates on, that people inside it are forced to work within. Hinata knows how to put it in the one and only way Yuno would be willing to engage with it, ha. Aaaand looks like it's less roleplaying and more delusion. oh Yuno ah she figures out how to make him open his mouth by pressing on his jaw Yuno honey maybe the police wont come after HIM but after the shit you pulled it sure as fuck will come after YOU then again according to Akise it was coming after you anyway I guess I'm morbidly curious as to exactly how Yuno is going to organize Yukki peeing >_< huh, a sock aaaand Akise goes for the win! two skulls alas I already know One Spoiler that they are her parents, and her actions Almost Kinda Make Sense in that dream logic way so I think last time we saw the bodies they were mummies? but now that's definitely skeletons. huh

okay I'll be honest this is a reaction I did not predict this anime keeps surprising me with happenings that make perfect sense in retrospect, I really respect that about it OH IS THIS THE SCENE THAT SCREENSHOT SET WAS FROM NO I THINK THAT WAS YUKKI ASKING HER but Akise what the fuck are you counting on, that she'll come murder you in person??? I doubt all three of you could overpower her in Murder Mode tbh did you see her with an axe oh right you didnt :>

OH HEY THAT'S CLEVER I like how Yuno goes between 100% self-delusion about Yukki and painful 100% sane clarity about the horrible stuff with the other option being relatively normal interactions with Yuuki, memory suppression about murders and cheerful willingness to kill anyone for Yukki I think that second option really is better for her long-term )= you two do you realize she hears you as well maybe shut up okay no not really -I- know she's thinking because of the camera movement and stuff, -they- don't aaand she laughs. i dont think anyone (other than Akise I guess) saw this coming okay yeah looks like the gamble failed. the mind-preservation instinct of retreating into delusion overpowered the more mundane concerns so that's totally ventilation up there huh. I'm not sure if the gas plan will work for her huh so hum moment of truth WILL Akise send the email to the police or was that just a threat? (orrr the police might know already? he might have told That Nice Cop Guy about it) awww Kousaka's dying message is kinda cute

kinda superfluous - the police already know who they're looking for - but nice AHAHAHA POST LIMIT THAT'S KINDA HILARIOUS THAT'S WHY EVERYONE ELSE JUST USED THE MEMO FUNCTION ah no the rank increased fair enough wait what????? what the fuck @ Deus ah okay to clarify: what the fuck @ 8th well hey it worked out! I still quesiton a ventilation duct in a gassing room but hey I guess there was a lot of gas and Yuno didn't see a reason to conserve it and Kousaka's question is of course why the fuck is Yuno in her underwear. I mean... fair enough, I'm kinda curious too omfg

HELLO POLICE I WOULD LIKE TO REPORT A MURDER oh right... bad joke anyway I like how camera doesn't play along with Kousaka, while he's saying he's the ultimate weapon he's literally blocked by Yuno's head. we know who the main character is oh hey Yukki is coming to his senses! but can't talk huh right I figured it'd be the soda

*whaps with newspaper* NO NO BAD YUNO STOP THAT (she's drawn so prettily tho damn <3)

oh my sweet summer child you don't know the rules of this game AT ALL hum and the girls can't escape the same way he did because they aren't tall enough dude she's gone up against like five diary owners already and came up on top every time you don't know who you're challenging

huh she actually agrees to play the game wonder if that's genuine or if she has a plan like, I can imagine she's just been pulled into the situation and the role of the big bad setting up traps enough to enjoy toying with people and not just getting her way at the very least she hasn't axe-murdered him... or Hinata for that matter... yet

SERIOUSLY WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED it definitely wasn't just one event tho. Yuno doesn't act like someone who used to be a normal healthy kid in a supportive environment until One Bad Thing Happened and took their entire world. No, Yuno is acting like someone who'd built up the dissociation/delusion defense mechanisms over a long, long time, like, say, a victim of abuse who finally snapped and then didnt find a way to snap back I just wanna knooooow

OH MY GOD SHE SOUNDS LIKE SHE HAS A PLAN IS IT NECROMANCY IS SHE GONNA DRESS UP YUKKI AND HINATA AS HER PARENTS WHAT THE FUCK hum what did Yukki realize that's not a key is it?

IT ACTUALLY WORKED I CAN'T BELIEVE aaand

yeah at least she didn't kill him... immediately hum

Hinata and Yukki are both tied up so I'm not sure what they can do together behind Yuno's back but I know a foreshadowing shot when I see one for all that this anime keeps genuinely surprising me with twists, it does take care to make the events easy to follow, and I like that this is Quality Storytelling

yeah but it would have shown a Dead End, right??? or does it not work like that because it's like a 'secondary' diary, an offshoot of the 8th??? I wonder

AHAHHA sorry Yuno you're used to being up against diary owners, but so is Yukki, and he's been growing more competent at this too

NICE and she'd given him his own diary -> ???? brilliant decision but seriously if Hinata did something to Yukki wouldn't that be predicted orrr I guess Yukki's actions were actions of a diary owner so when he made a new decision based on his diary (again, brilliant decision) it changed he prediction ooooohhh she kicked the key that wasn't doing anything to Yukki in itself, it just enabled Yukki to act, which, again, the actions of a diary owner three diary owners????? please tell me that's Akise and Mao and oh right Kousaka was the third one the math doesn't add up :x I think the three diary owners would be able to find them bc of Kousaka's Diary and that's the 8th's plan

this must look so utterly surreal from the side

Yuno? You're not going to drug me and tie me up and try to kill my friends, are you? This girl seriously needs to learn how normal relationships work and I Yearn to learn what the fuck fucked her up like that.

BAD MOVE YUNO HE ALREADY TRIED THAT THIS IS THE RESULT

congrats Yuno you Fucked That Up

sorry but... yeah. you deserve this

???? someone in the cast lives in an orphanage??? I'm calling Akise in that case

oh nm it's something else huh

ah that's what it was oh Kousaka everything about you was a bad idea ...

... what

it really, really fucking isn't Yukki acted on information he had, and made the best decisions he had available. but he can't control other people's actions

...are these... the apprentice diary owners? how does the system work, anyway? how does the 8th send them after anyone? Kousaka has no clue...

uh was the dramatic slo mo effect in-universe too??? they were kind of racing on opposite lanes that couldn't have taken more than like. two seconds

see that's not wrong but. you really need to up your girlfriend game dammit im just rooting for Yuno in all this. you go girl. you fight your inner demons and figure out a happy ending for yourself damn that felt like a really long episode. probably because of the screenshots here's a proposition of a new function for the tumblr staff: uploading .rtf files automatically, splitting into several posts if they are too big. thats the kind of convenience the social media is supposed to offer, right? oh hey Murmur's diary! third installment of the You Saved Me series

beautiful

you naive fucking child oh my god Murmur

MURMUR NO

so was this, like, a dream or something? hum interesting

[unproduciblesmackdown]

yallnve realized by now that this is a fulltime 100% narnia blog...and as i havent slept since finding out someone somewhere was set on making "the silver chair" into a movie & the dynamic world of narnalysis is the best i can offer,

first of all im like.........ya rly gonna just jump into the silv chair!! im not really interested w the details on what anyone plans to do with the content b/c i donno, ive never been really interested in the book. not because its like bad or anything, actually it's probably the most cinematic in terms of things actually happening at a steady rate. i just like what i like, maybe because its sort of lower scale? whatever. its not like its hard to make into a movie i dont think, is what im saying. that would be either the horse and his boy or prince caspian, probably the latter b/c like a genuine 1/3 of it is an expository flashback. but all of the books are bit tricky to adapt coz theyre just short, you have to pad basically all of them in some way or another. but sure. silver chair. w/e

the thing is that you Have to assume despite starting afresh that theyre doing this one since the first three books have been recently filmed? and this being the fourth. but How Are You Going To Just Jump Into This One. thats an awful lot of exposition thats being built on, at this point in the game we're neck deep in the Lore. you'd really just have to have read the previous books or at least seen the movies. are they counting on the audience to have done that? but at the same time its really not fair to fully rely on that. in the book you can go "read the other books" and wave it off in a sentence of "and then they explained it all" which does tend to happen in the actual text a fair amt. its a bit awkward in movie form though? its a plot point right off that eustace knows who prince/king caspian is. so then you have to sum up dawn treader. and that has to do with what happened in prince caspian, in which the plot of lww is pretty important. like, alright, possibly you could just explain tvotdt & take it from the perspective of the girl who doesnt know crap about narnia yet? but thats not nearly as good a starting point as lww. on account of that ones meant to be a starting point! i'll see scholastic / any publishings that try to push magician's nephew as the first book In Hell, frankly. strongest narnpinion right there. the published order over the chronological order

anyways i'm sure it can be figured out, its just.......Interesting to think how the silver chair intro might be made into Intro To Narnia v.2.0? will they even try or will it be "ok but seriously just have read the books or whatever before you come in here." mystery unfolds

another thing thats interesting is that lww is clearly abt like, hey kids here's a version of the resurrection for you. whereas silver chair doesnt have anything to do w any Biblical Events at all (tho of course neither does prince caspian, tvotdt, or the horse & his boy). it is instead about how atheists will try to steal your firstborns for.................reasons. (no reason, theyre just evil.) this one is just a major amplified version of another particularly ridiculous CS Lewis Apologism Favorite that runs through the books: that when it comes to having no Faith (in aslan but you know also the abrahamic god) everyone who doubts aslan/god is like, actively lying to themselves, because they have that Gut Feeling telling themself that their faith is not only whats righteous but also whats true. the gut feeling of truth is a big theme in the books, shit hinges on it all the time and makes doubt all Clearly Sinful instead of a reasonable result of aslan effing off for centuries or whatever. and speaking of, god only knows if lewis is really suggesting that real life doubt or nonreligiousness is 100% populated by people who are clenching their fists like "i know in my heart jesus is real but i dont want to believe it so i won't, damnit!" which yknow makes no sense for like....life, and uh? i dont know what its supposed to mean for like....other religions? i dont think he's about putting the nuance that not every concept of religious Faith is the same as in christianity into this book, i dunno abt his thoughts irl. lord knows its a mystery how he thinks that "if jesus wasnt lying and jesus wasnt Insane then christianity is real" argument means anything. nothing in the world fits that argument for finding out if something is true or not........and also it hinges on that concept of "insanity" which......like.......i'm sure is all about nice 1940s ideas of how "insane" people act. its shit, throw it out, i mean. and besides? as though theres a Logic argument to prove christianity as truth? have you just Solved religion, lewis? have you? sometimes, i swear..

anyhow so in the silver chair its just a big ol festival of his "atheists are lying to themselves" and "atheism starts by someone who Knows The Truth (jesus is real) lying to others, likely aka the devil or whatever, and the stand-in for the devil is a witch again." and lewis really seems fond of the allegory of the cave. smh! like, in that allegory "knowing" that your faith is true is impossible! but youre also out here arguing its logically provable? and don't forget the gut feelings thing. but it makes NO sense for him to drop it into this book universe because in this allegory the prince captured by atheists & the protags are people who have hopped into the cave and seen the sun and shit!! they dont need to be the people who have only ever seen shadows who need to be convinced that an outside world can exist!!! bitch!!! get your allegory in order. silver chair just.....lord. the lying babysnatching atheists

a n y w a y s . . . thats a weird conflict to put in your third act, and its also a weird argument to make re christianity, that even though you acknowledge its impossible to know that your faith is in something thats real, you're willing to risk it? its sort of like that idea that you might as well be religious even if you dont "believe" any religion is true, because you lose nothing and potentially gain both comfort in life and reward in an afterlife. but its kind of a big deal in christianity that you're supposed to believe that what you believe in Is Literally Real. maybe apologists are allowed to do that sort of thing in their arguments, i suppose. its like in the last battle where he has a dude who believes in another deity accepted into the christian afterlife b/c despite a lack of belief, his virtuous nature is, from a practical standpoint, accepted to be for all intents and purposes to be equivalent to having believed in the christian god, like if he happened to follow all other rules except the Believing In Jesus one then he's good to go anyhow. interesting in that its also supposed to be pretty vital in christianity that one has to accept jesus as god in order to be Saved all up into heaven! i suppose that guy in the book was meant to have been converted right before death or whatever. at that point its very unclear who is exactly dead or not, but probably everyone. still, aslan clearly makes the argument that "basically you might as well have been believing in me, so you're good to go." fascinating stuff. another one to ask lewis abt

uhhhh another point is that i think theyre intending to make other movies also? but not all four remaining ones!! and if i had to guess which one they'd be leaving out uhh lets say....the horse & his boy....................which conveniently is the other sort of sparsely plotted one. two kids ride horses towards narnia, briefly have to have a shenanigansy undercover sneak through a crowded city, ride towards narnia some more, and then one of them stays at some guys house while the other kid goes into narnian battle where he himself doesnt actually do anything, but that fact is described pretty funnily. its still sort of a fun one, on account of the sneaking around hijinx, and the fact that it happens to give ANY of the details of what tf the pevensies did for like the twenty years they reigned over narnia's golden age which the lww just tells you absolutely n o t h i n g about! the answer is: a lot of battling probably, on account of narnia went from being ruled for a century by someone who could kill you in a second and also why would you have invaded narnia at that time, it wouldve been like trying to invade russia. but then a bunch of kids took the throne and upended the whole system and the snow went away, it seems like a destabilizey time to invade or whatever. imo. but then again they mightve bought themselves a few years on account of aslan having shown up and all. but lbr, they were just put into battle right off and coronated three seconds later, theres no reason on that front that they wouldnt shy away from having more battles. and the books said there were a lot of battles. and in thahb, its like, well we've been battling a lot lately and now we're in shenanigans and we'll just have to battle our way out of it, which they absolutely do. edmund straight up decapitates a guy. how ARE they supposed to just transition immediately into english schoolchildren after a couple decades of that mess??? they even have the fancy courtly speech. its magic i suppose

the point is its kind of a fun book, oh also, aslan is TOP shenanigans in this one. he straight up actually attacks one of the protagonists, for Reasons, but still. not that he doesn't murder the pevensies in the last book. i mean, i guess you could argue that its just like Divine Coincidence where what with the unaligned timelines betwixt england and narnia, aslan couldve just picked the moment everyone was gonna die anyway and just tossed them over to X point in time in narnia. but I Donno.....im kinda with that university student who's stressing about whether aslan cause ww2 for the purpose of sending the pevensies to the wardrobe. like, that train accident that killed everybody killed four people on the platform & five people on the train in different carriages and everything, or maybe the numbers are switched because i dont remember where lucy was. im saying, that was a hell of a crash. but sure. anyhow, even more fun, aslan appears as a cat to the Other protag while he's spending a night on the edge of the wilderness, and scratches him for saying he once threw rocks at a stray cat. like, hard #same, aslan!!! wtf dude why arent YOU being claimed by satan

whats also fun is that it doesn't really take place in narnia, which is also the reason besides pacing that you wouldnt really want to make this one into a film? because uhhhh the whole worldbuilding lewis crapt upon everyone for calormen is clearly racist as fuccck. if you arent already familiar with all the books (namely this one and i suppose the last battle) then its like.....i guess its some sort of vague notion of the ottoman empire? its really just a mashup of any number of white-english-variety racist notions. everyone is brown, is it an inaccurate stab at an amorphous amalgam of middle eastern culture? east asian? are people islamic or hindu? just try and guess what he was going for because its just. not based on anyone needing to know anything about reality. lewis was against seasoning food i guess, because it will mention i guess like, people cooking with onions like the heathens they are. (spoilers: this country just exists in the narniaverse to represent Those Heathens). its not necessarily an Evil place, they are noble savages ok!! with their formal seriousness and cutthroat customs.......b/c they are not as advanced and peaceful as the white northern christians, see. closer to the less developed violence of their inherently backwards ways and Cruel Society reigned by violence DONT CONVERT OR YOU'LL DIE, KIDS. but also.....you wont be white? the reason of calormens existence is really never explained. telmarines came from englandverse on accident thru a magic portal just lying around, possibly thats whats meant to have happened there too? its never attempted to be explained. anyways its basically the intro to the disney aladdin.

lewis is entirely inconsistent and self contradictory all throughout the series for the sake of the authors convenience. this is part of what makes the stories fun and the worldbuilding charming. it is also what allows him to pull stunts that have you pinching the bridge of your nose in exasperation and writing out essays to try to figure out how narnia is supposed to work. it is also what allows him, five books in, to be like, "here is the country to the south where the demon-worshipping gross scary brown uncivilized folk sit around hating narnia and confirming any racist notion you have about any nonwhite nonchristian country or culture." thanks, clive

its of course ludicrous and, of course, the protagonist shasta just so happens to be white despite being raised calormene. spoilers, he is narnian. or really from archenland, which isnt narnia but is still white and pro-narnia so its alright. i mean, technically narnia is allied with calormen at all points in time of the series? calormen just quietly tries an invasion in that book and also in the last book. so thats interesting. i suppose lewis is anti-crusades, which is big of him. the pevs arent out here trying to conquer calormen and convert them to narnianism. so that must not be the Destiny of the true christian? or are we meant to believe calormenes are beyond help? shasta who is of course secretly not "really" calormene is still representing someone undergoing "conversion," yet again, the guy is white. i suppose being brown is whats hopeless?

theres an inadvertently laughable line at the start of the book where a calormene expositorially points out that shasta is white by comparing him to the "accursed but beautiful" narnians. who are all white? is he just talking about the pevensies? the archenlanders (i cant remember where theyre meant to have come from either.) are like, all humanoid narnian natives white?? wtf, aslan. anyways, the dialogue is unnatural and funny enough, but its also like.....ok lewis, we got it, whiteness is the standard for all universes and everyone wishes they were white. stupid, sexy narnians.

what alllllmost suggests that being a poc isnt an automatic fastpass to hell is that im fairly sure the second protagonist aravis is a nonwhite calormene?? i dont remember it ever saying she was "fair" like the narnians the way the book immediately points out that shasta is. she is of course escaping an arranged marriage (the calormene plot to sort of vaguely try to invade narnia is also based on forcing susan to marry a dude she doesnt like yet who she apparently genuinely considered as a suitor when he wasnt acting like a jerk? so not only a dude who isnt white but a dude who isnt aslanian christian. its a whole complicating element to just toss out in this otherwise flat af worldbuilding, dude!! not to mention? despite the battles and shit, susan was out here considering marriage? how absolutely fucked up would it have been if any of them married and then effed off back to england. moving along) but she is from the start portrayed as equally sympathetically as shasta and nothing about her is pointed out as being Bad and Reprehensible, which the narration has no qualms about doing. she even gets to spend some time with her calormene friend, who is not exactly meant to be as sympathetic or noble but certainly isnt portrayed as at all evil. like...theres at least the occasional exception apparently, in which maybe not every person is inherently evil and violent and cruel. who knows

also aravis definitely later marries the white protag?? but apparently interracial marriage isnt entirely Unthinkable here. wait, also, aravis claims to be somehow a direct descendant of the calormene god tash? first of all, is that true, comma, possible? in the last book its confirmed that tash is real, albeit, like, a demon. dunno what c.s. is telling us with that one. is aravis related to a demon. we can only guess on account of the theme of Inconsistency

anyways. i suppose you could make it into a movie if you just threw out the racist shit. but the "calormen is also distinguished from narnia via its religion" element is also a touch janky. can it be thrown out too? if they intend to produce the last battle, will it be thrown out then. it kind of comes up again. if you get rid of those elements though, the stakes get a little blurrier and more political and more "wait well why would they have any beef with each other in the first place" if you cant just easily point out that the calormenes are shaking their fists at the narnians and their demon worship and their jealousy at not being white. again, are all centaurs white or something? wtf

truly calormene is the most racist ass shit in the whole series, but the concept comes up in less painfully direct ways other times, too. why are there native species in narnia that are considered inherently evil?? sure, the white witch as the stand-in for the devil wasn't originally from narnia. was she creating shit too? i dont remember what she was up to on account of i havent read the magicians nephew in a hot minute. i know they had to take a pegasus into a garden of eden type shit to smoke her out of wherever she was lurking for some reason or another. still. whys there whole types of creatures who are universally and unilaterally condemned? i know we're meant to believe that they just have evil intent according to their nature, but uh....theres no point at which any of these creatures are given a chance? maybe they served the white witch because she was nice to them for once. you're not given the chance to know. EXCEPT for the fact that you get shit like: giants are evil save for the occasional exception, like in lww when a "good" giant is described as having like, a long family line, and "traditions." not like Those Sorts. they do talk in like prince caspian and shit, when their numbers are miserable and theyre discussing tactics, whether to get help from the gross hags and harpies and etc and ppl will talk about Those People and Sorts and Rabble and its like...jfc. b/c apparently sommme of them can be decent! if theyre a giant or whatever. and meanwhile the dwarfs are always chaotic neutral or whatever. not believing in aslan but not necessarily being anti-narnia coz they live there. but sometimes being good guys!! but sometimes being bad guys, and jadis was cool to them apparently. like.................theres definitely cases of Types of narnians who fall outside the "born good / born bad" system, and thats pretty fucked. wolves too? theyre the Talking Beasts aslan definitely created, but on the side of the white witch? how was she having trees be on her side, too? whats going on around here. whats the moral meant to be. smh

uhh well anyhow, you could do a nice essay on gender re narnia. on account of sometimes its staleass typical sexist tropes like uhh, say,, the devil stand-ins keep being women? witches, ok. and the idea of "women need to be protected as pure creatures" as a basic sexist notion, and even lewis taking a relatively subdued jab at the idea of calling that sexist. susan being the miniature mom character type, and of course the infamous last battle bit where, in an attempt to describe her lack of spirituality as a self-insert of what lewis considered his own period of fake maturity via rejection of christianity, she's of course not only described as not believing in narnia (which????? what is anyone supposed to make of that. again, in the allegory of the cave shit, she's been outside the cave!!! she lived in narnia for YEARS AND YEARS and then WENT BACK. how are we supposed to believe she just convinced herself it wasnt literally real? its not quite the same as someone losing their faith in christianity.) but as like, wearing makeup, damn her. even if he wasnt trying to make the point that "look at boys and go to hell" which, i suppose he couldnt, as in narnia susan was being courted just fine as queen, yet i suppose also she didnt marry anyone—anyways, of course its still sexist to slight the way she decides to dress as some form of false maturity, even if its meant to be metaphor. just clumsy af & not great when again, devils are always witches around here. and being younger is to be more spiritually pure which like............mmm ok. this is sort of another one of those weirdly sexless fantasy universes, why do those keep happening. i mean sure this is a christian fairy tale for kids. but nobody even gets married save for in the last paragraphs of a couple books. its left a bit ambiguous whether thats even spiritually acceptable in the narnia rules, unless its to Continue the Line a la the telmarine monarchy from caspian the first to tirian the whateverth. hm

but also of course you get the young girl characters being...somewhat almost allowed to fight (archery mainly) but anyways at least being given equal status to the boys who are there also. theres even mention of once apparently narnia being ruled by a queen w no kings around. fantastic. and theres some non-witch lady characters on occasion. the human characters are where the dynamics are most at, i suppose, but anyways this at least has some nuance & at times seems to go just a bit beyond what you might expect from some old dude in the 50s. still not that surprising or innovative, but not completely flat, and seeming to contain at least a little reflection upon the topic

the essay of race re: narnia would be really short though. Its Racist Af. if you threw classism in too, you might get a bit more length out of it. but really its just so flat in this subject, and totally needless. there's the fact that even narnia is ruled by white english people but.....you can really do without juxtaposing this with the heinous nonwhite country somewhere over there. the rest of the books operate just fine w/o this

tolkien mentioned HIS scary brown backwards civilization to the south a lot more fleetingly in lotr but its....v much the same worldbuilding as narnia??? aka middle earth is pretty much an imaginary proto-england where you dont want to go too far east or south or you run into dangerous &/or inherently evil territory!! ok, jrr.....who was the other people in the inklings?? what did they write. could no one rein these guys in. coz lewis is over here with his Alternate Universe england. with uhhhh wilderness to the north and west and the dangerous evilish racismland to the south. and the ocean and dont forget narnia is a flat earth to the east. also? why are the lone islands like that. can aslan take care of some of that shit. for gods sake. anyways. the all-white good guys / evil poc should be thrown out of everything, thats not what makes the worldbuilding in either lotr or chronarnia at all interesting. yet is it is surely a subsection of the inherent Englishness of both examples........it warrants analysis but not "carrying on into films or anything based on either's precedence in the fantasy genre."

god who knows what im talking about at this point. im just saying "if they arent looking to even bother trying to wrangle the horse and his boy into something not ludicrously racist then i wouldnt be at all surprised." still, do you suppose theres like a curse where unless all narnia books are given some sort of film adaptation, the world won't know peace? more likely the world would end, maybe. the curse of clive. i dont really remember but that elder bbc series sure didnt cover the whole saga

well this is long enough but lets all set off in more endless, doomed narnalysis, such as

my thesis on trying to figure out what. the Fuck any reader is supposed to make out of edmund's role in the lww

whats the deal with merpeople?!

where are all these witches coming from, anyways

seriously if the narnians were just less murderous to the Undesirable species would they have been on the pro-aslan side all along

if there was only two humans staying in narnia at its birth, wouldnt their line like, die out immediately with their kid.

where did the archenlanders come from

where did the calormenes come from

oh yeah and like. are we seriously meant to believe that, at the end of the world, when aslan reveals that being goodnatured supercedes having the Wrong Religion, there is only one calormene in all of a) current existence and b) history who fits the bill? really. why even bring it up, then.

how did narnians react to their four monarchs completely disappearing......for real.....and what happened to the line to the throne?? was there just no ruler until the telmarines came in and took things over for the rest of the few centuries or whatevs.

when was that deep magic in lww written? at the start of narnia? coz thats the magicians nephew. again, how tf did the white witch get any leverage in that one. how was that supposed to be a good idea. wtf. see my thesis

whats the white witch supposed to represent as a stand-in for the devil? not helping that i dont remember the details of magicians nephew for shit, but she's definitely in the Multiverse lore of narnia as being from a different world as narnia and england. wtf is like...her nature

how weird is it in narnia that you have a god who drops in confused alien children to both go on personal journeys and save the world? is narnia-aslan/earth-jesus also dropping other children from other worlds into other other worlds? via other forms? hmm

lewis is all but inviting us the readers to be filling in the blanks with narnia fic. he's basically like, outright actually inviting fic with people wanting to speculate what happens with susan, who must inevitably return to narnia as lewis intends her to represent his own departure from (and obvious inevitable return to) christianity

a weird detail that is also never elaborated on: in addition to the narrator freely inserting loads of opinions into the narration, there's a time or two its made clear that like, the narrator has gotten this info from interviewing the characters. how'd you know about that last battle, "they all died and this happened in the afterlife" shit, huh. just another weird element

sussing out other lewispinions, like how he hates all schools apparently

narnia vs middle earth!! both quasi englands, both pre industrialization, both with christ figures running around some more than others, both with the need for rightful kings, totally different roles for humans tho. well, thats the whole comparison

and, inevitably, more.

[sleeplessinsiswati]

Create Heaven Here—My Story

For the record, this probably should have been the first “official” post for this blog. My bad, I’m a learn-as-you-go type so I’ve been messing around and BOOM well, here we are.

*clears throat* ahem...

When I was young I wanted to be a writer. I always dreamed of being a writer; of my words mattering to someone. The unique ability of being able to eloquently articulate thoughts and touch someone else deeply was nothing short of a poetic wonderland in my childhood imagination. Now I am older, and I realise that words, these words are all that I have to give. I once believed that this was not enough; that the sum of who I am had to add up to more than what I can say about this life, or what I have seen of it. I now understand that it does not have to be more than this so much as it has to be true, no matter if the impact of those words is great or small. I am writing this because I wanted my first post in country to be about me; here I will paint an in-depth portrait of who I am and why I am here.

________________________________

It is a common theme in stories originating from the continent of Africa that history is intertwined with mythology, and so too the story of my life is told. Before I was born, my father wanted to name me Shaka Zulu in honour of the infamous, Southern-African warrior. My mother protested, worried that I would endure ridicule and shame because of a lack of understanding from other children or teachers. And with that wisdom, I was instead named after her, Desmond—the son of Desiree. If only they had saw fit to ask the Creator to not give me the soul of a warrior since it was decided I would no longer be receiving the name. I was born with asthma. Mom would later tell me that it was because even before I was born the evil of this world wanted to steal my breath, to take my words.

In early childhood, I found it hard to have a voice for myself. As a matter of fact, for the first year and a half of my life my parents did not think that I could talk at all; my older brother, Gerald, would always speak for me. Whatever he liked, I liked; whatever he wanted, I wanted. It wasn’t until one fateful Sunday School class where there was an option of cheese or peanut butter and jelly crackers that I had spoken publicly at all. With whatever self-esteem I could muster up in my infantile body I stated very clearly, and to the surprise of all in attendance, that I wanted peanut butter and jelly crackers. That would be my first fight; my brother wanted me to have the cheese crackers. From then on my life would be a series of advocating for myself or on behalf of others, and willingly paying the price no matter the cost.

I got into a good number of fights as a child. I was more passionate than I was “boy”. I had a spirit of fire and wind; free, scorching, and bold. I went from unspeaking and timid to outspoken and determined. Dont ask me what I was determined to do, though. To this day, I do not know what I was so serious, so keen on grasping at prepubescence. I was raised in the church like most Southern Louisiana, Black boys. It was here that I was able to find comfort and a sense of pride. Along with the classroom, the sanctuary was a place where my words were accepted; it was a place where intelligence and passion could meet, and where adults were impressed and were quick to take promising young pupils under their wing. Many teachers spoke highly of my performance in the classroom, and so did ministers at my place of worship. Unfortunately for me, there was a great degree of protection that was in the church setting that was not remotely available in an inner-city elementary school with a magnet component.

I could never understand at the time, from the background which I came, why “Church Boy” was an insult. Honestly, it didn’t bother me so much as the implications that came with it. Implications like that I could not defend myself; that even if I could not, that I had parents who would quickly take up for me; that I was weak and afraid of a world that was unknown to me; that someone else had the right to take these things from me. These statements were made between curled lips and clenched teeth and clenched fists; from smacked lips and cold stares I learned that having two parents in one home and having an identity rooted in church life were things to be snickered at. With those snickers came threats, boys posturing themselves to be perceived as men; willing to play at absolute dominant power in the face of what seemed like a helpless Christian kid. And with that, I let those assholes eat my fists. Never one to back down from a fight, I got in more fights in and out of school between my elementary and high school years than I care to remember, in and out of school. I lost many of them, I won some. One thing I never did was back down. I would be felt, I would be heard, I would be respected.

This philosophy came to frustrate my parents who constantly reinforced a message of choosing battles. Though I felt an angst from the outside world, there was no difference in emotion concerning the place that I called home. My mom has always been a jewel in my mind; her beauty, poise, and radiance will never fade and will always be priceless. My dad, my protector; a strong tower and defender of his family, which for him was his pride and joy. En lieu of these praises I now sing, the truth is as a child I felt very much alone and afraid. My dad would often invalidate the words I would say as foolish or thoughtless, and it was a rare sighting for my mom to protect my emotions from his aggression in those moments. Mom was an artist in her day, and I would say very much so an existentialist. She taught her sons to feel, and to feel deeply the offerings of this life; what a gift this is, and it is one I will forever be grateful for. But, what a curse this was, when under the weight of the absolute terror that is an emotionally insensitive parent. As if the words and insults of a man you see as your protector and provider were not enough, the inexplicable silence of that other person who built you as this fragile human being made for a combination that never ceased to knock the wind out of me.

Even in sports, which I did not particularly excel in for some time, my brother and I were not seen by other players as much more than the coaches’ sons. With this came the same insults and curses that I experienced at school, but only this time in an environment of high passions and high volatility. Myself, being the more hotheaded between Gerald and I, always took the bait of these insults only to be publicly humiliated by my dad once word reached to him. It was inescapable, this fog of perpetual pain that occasioned seasonal rays of artistic expression and raging passion that served as my outlets. The one haven, the castle on the hill in this experience was the church. I was a child that was made vulnerable to everything, and therefore I felt everything. This eternity of feeling left me ragged and tired of many things, and as a result I became a very cold and methodical young man. I became what others would refer to as “mature” and “wise beyond my years” or “strong”; I never wanted to be any of these things. I never wanted to be strong, I just wanted to be safe.

Through sheer determination and willpower I did well both academically and athletically in high school. I graduated, and went on to undergraduate studies out of state. More than anything I wanted to leave behind Louisiana and it’s incessant ignorance and backwards logic; how wrong was I to think that it was a regional issue. I decided in college that I wanted to be a different person, a more visible leader and advocate on behalf of myself and other. I think it was this thought that guided me to make a vast majority of the decisions I would come to make, both good and bad. I would hold a few positions on campus and ran track my first two years of college. These points are not why this era in my life matters, though. It was here that my life would first fall apart, and largely because of my own doing. Somewhere between my university studies and my out-of-class experiences I no longer believed God had an active role in my life. I mean sure He was up there and guided me to the school in the first place, but looking back on my life I did not see a reason to believe that there was this ultimately powerful being who had been looking out on my behalf; again, the God I knew made me vulnerable, transparent to a world that sought to destroy my faith in it and in Him at every turn. If that was the God that had been watching me since birth I wanted nothing to do with Him, or, rather, I think we needed to spend some time apart.

And so, I lived my life and I lived it grandly. Unashamedly infatuated with luxury, opportunity, and prestige, I was well-known on campus; in some ways, I was notorious on campus. Eventually, that notoriety caused me to make some ridiculous college kid decisions, as most college kids do, that almost had very adult consequences. Regardless of what did not happen, one particular situation had consequences that resulted in a very loud, very public fall from grace; I was ashamed. That summer, on my annual return to Louisiana, I was broken and lost. I felt alone, embarrassed, and trapped, not much different from how I once felt as a child. It was in this season that I began reading Thich Nhat Hanh and meditating. I began shaving my head, a sign of consecration to a purpose I had long thought I lost or forgotten, and cut all meats out of my diet except for fish.

Yet embarrassed because of the terms on which I left the university, I told some of my peers and fraternity brothers that I more than likely would not be returning. The weight of the guilt and reliving the chaos of the preceding year seemed too much to bear. In the midst of these thoughts came the same soft, cool, all-consumingly overwhelming feeling that led me to the institution, initially. In that moment, to my soul came the urge to return and that if I were to not return I would be a coward. “What has kept you, will not sustain you”. Those words, words that came, in my opinion, from the universe directly to my spirit were the words that I rode all the way to Nashville on a 12am Greyhound bus.

In this final year of university, I discovered more about myself that I can explain; who I was, who I was not, who I wanted to be, and who I was willing to become. The magic of the moments in that year seemed to meet me in roaring waves of enlightenment and revelation; I was alive, fully alive for the first time. In this season I began to see the early formations of a personal philosophy that would become the cornerstone of a dream—a dream to create my own reality. It would be this dream that would propel me to achieve another lifelong dream of mine: becoming a Peace Corps volunteer.

Peace Corps was, and is still, an opportunity for me to connect with people world’s away; to learn their language, their ways of life, what life means to them, and what love means to them. For me, this was, and again still is, perfectly in alignment with who I wanted to become and had been a dream for me for quite some time. Well, after finishing my undergraduate studies, a two year completion of graduate studies back at home, and a marriage-to-my-best-friend later, I and my partner were granted the opportunity to become Peace Corps Volunteers in eSwatini (Swaziland). After months of training, going from Septemeber 27th to December 12th, we were able to be sworn in, officially, as volunteers of the United States Peace Corps. These past few months have been riddled with their own, unique challenges. Viewing life as an adventure helps me to make light of these experiences, and to examine them objectively, in the grand scheme of life.

The experiences I have had the blessed opportunity to be a part of and the future experiences I will have the chance to live and feel will be documented and scribed here for two main purposes: to tell a story that often times is not told; the story of the Black male minority, who has a rare opportunity to go places that many other Black people may never have the chance or the courage to. The second purpose, is to be transparent about the hard work and the beautiful struggle that is connecting, living, and loving other human beings. Despite the difficulties, despite language barriers, despite whatever obstacles, I believe that all people seek peace and connection, wholeness and reconciliation. It is this belief that has guided me, that has become my personal philosophy, and that continues to guide me.

To close, I refer to the Biblical passage of the story of the Tower of Babel; all of humanity came together with the grand cause of building a tower to reach the heights Heaven. Not only were they successful in their united endeavors, but so much so that the hosts of Heaven feared that humanity would ascend into the Heavens because, when they were united, there was nothing they could not accomplish. As a result, humanity was called to speak different languages in order to cause division and confusion amongst themselves. I am here, and walk this Earth, with the intention of rebuilding that tower; or rather, to bring about the revelation that Heaven was the ability to have peace and love, united in a cause for the benefit for all of humanity.

Once there was an endeavour to build a tower to reach unto Heaven. Why build up when what you truly seek is inside and around you? You do not have to wait until you die; you do not have to wait for an act of God. You are the act of God; your life is an act of God. Come on; let’s Create Heaven Here.

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Hey guys, my name's Rob and I thought I'd share my experience as an entrepreneur starting an online coupon site DealsXtra and an email sourcing tool Contactout. Lately, I've been musing on trying to find a greater sense of purpose, so please take the time to read the article below and let me know what you think​I went to one of those personal development cults seminars once, and I asked a barrage of questions:What is the purpose of life? What should I do with my life?“Shut the fuck up”, the seminar leader said“You already know all the answers inside. You’re just asking me for permission to do what you already know is right. You’re looking for validation. Stop. You don’t need anyone’s permission. When you get an internal sense of what’s right, just go do it. Act, and then see what happens. Adjust your actions depending on the results that you get.When you come across a problem, think for yourself how to solve it, trust in your own judgement. See the world with your own fresh pair of eyes and make your own conclusions from first hand experience. Don’t just listen to everything that other people tell you. Always question and think critically; other people are no smarter than you are. Listen to others, but think for yourself.”FOLLOW YOUR HEARTThe best advice I’ve ever gotten in my life is to follow my heart. I think of it like, there’s a guiding compass inside of me, that always knows which direction to go. An inner voice that knows what’s right. I just need to tune into it and trust it.For example, right after university, I worked in investment banking and hated my life. I hated the lack of freedom, the repetitive tasks, the ass kissing. I knew I wanted to work on my own business. An online business that would let me travel and explore the world. But I didn’t trust myself. I’ve studied so hard to land this job. All my friends where in corporate. How could it possibly be the right move to leave when everyone else was happily working? Wasn’t I living the corporate dream? I kept looking to other people for career advice, when I already knew. It took me 6 months to find the courage. I decided to start my own business – it was the best decision of my life.Elon Musk also follows his heart. He calls it: “thinking from first principles”. When asked how he came up with the ideas for Tesla, SpaceX and Paypal, Elon looked inside. He asked himself what are the biggest problems that humanity is currently facing? And thought about solutions to those problems. Meanwhile, most people are caught up with the crowd, trying to ride market trends. Let’s do cryptocurrency for dogs!SOCIAL CONDITIONINGThere are all these people telling us how we should live our lives. Social conditioning is fucking with us everywhere. Work is telling us that climbing the corporate ladder means success in life. Fashion trends are defining what beautiful is. Our social group is making us conform and act in a socially acceptable way.Man, I see in Fight Club the strongest and smartest men who’ve ever lived. I see all this potential, and I see it squandered. God damn it, an entire generation pumping gas, waiting tables – slaves with white collars. Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don’t need. We’re the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our great war is a spiritual war. Our great depression is our lives. We’ve all been raised by television to believe that one day we’d all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars, but we won’t. We’re slowly learning that fact. And we’re very, very pissed off. – Fight ClubHumans are tribal creatures; we’re wired to go with the crowd. But just because everyone else believes in something, it does not mean that it’s right. In the past, everyone believed that the earth was flat. We look back and think that’s ridiculous. Now imagine that you’re in the future looking back. Could it be that there are heaps of popular beliefs we hold today that our future selves would think are ridiculous?We forget to listen to ourselves. Our default state is to listen to others. We spend our lives trying to live up to other people’s expectations. But most people have never sat down and really thought about what they want to do with their lives. And it’s important that we think about it because we only have one life. We only have a limited time on this planet. One day we will be dead.You’re time is limited so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most importantly, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. – Steve JobsThe challenge for our generation is creating a world where everyone has a sense of purpose. Purpose is that sense that we are part of something bigger than ourselves, that we are needed, that we have something better ahead to work for. Purpose is what creates true happiness. – Mark ZuckerbergSOCIAL CONDITIONING VS FOLLOWING OUR HEARTSDo we listen to social conditioning? Or do we follow our hearts? The book “The Fountainhead” explores this question. The story goes like this:Once upon a time there were two architects who went to university together – Peter and Howard. Peter was super social; he became the head of the architecture society. He networked his way into a really prestigious firm after he graduated. Worked incredibly hard, sucked up to all the right people and eventually became a director of the firm. Made tonnes of money and retired a rich man. Towards the end of his days, though, he looked back on all the buildings that he designed and thought to himself: “All these buildings are ugly, I don’t like a single one of them. Every building I designed was driven by what the client wanted, or what my firm wanted.” He felt like his vision of the perfect building was still trapped inside him, and that nothing he achieved in life meant anything.Meanwhile the other architect, Howard, just didn’t give a fuck. He hated the Victorian design classes at university because it was unnecessarily ornate. Howard wanted to do minimalist post modern design. He ended up dropping out of university and going to intern with an architect who he had a lot of respect for. However, the architect wasn’t getting much business because his designs were so radical. Later on, Howard started his own firm. But he would only take on clients if the client gave him complete freedom to design the building however he wanted. His clients would have no say in the design at all. Howard didn’t have many clients and only built a few buildings in his career. However, he felt that every building that he built was a representation of his truest vision of art. The pylons of the building were like Howard’s bones, the windows and wooden finishings were his skin and flesh, each building was a temple to his soul.Would you rather be Howard? Or would you rather be Peter?How has social conditioning influenced how you live?Write down 10 of your core beliefs.Which of your beliefs did you consciously decide upon, and how many have been dictated by society?Which of your beliefs are helping you and which beliefs are holding you?Are you living the life you want to live, or the life society wants you to live?How do YOU want to live your life?LOVE WHAT YOU DOYour work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking until you find it. Don’t settle. – Steve JobsWHY BIGGER GOALS ARE BETTERMost people set small goals in life. We don’t set ourselves big goals because we’ll fail. But big goals are actually easier to achieve than small goals. People are inspired by big goals and will go out of their way to help you. Investors will give you money. Big goals create movements and bring together teams. Small goals may be easier to accomplish, but not as many people will help you do it. Also there’s much less competition with big goals. How many of your friends are trying to cure cancer or solve cold fusion? How many friends work in accounting? Sure curing cancer is a million times harder than working in accounting, but there’s a million times more people that your competing against if you choose accounting.When I started my coupon site 7 years ago, I just wanted to earn enough money to support myself and travel. This wasn’t going to become a big business, so I had trouble attracting investors. When I pitched at startup conferences, investors would be like, “cool story bro, needs more dragons.” I had no money, and my goal wasn’t very inspiring, so I had trouble hiring great people. I ended up spending 4 years figuring out marketing by myself and building the business to a level where it supports my lifestyle – yay, go me.Meanwhile, Tim Kently-Klay managed to build Zoox into a 1.5 billion dollar business in the same time frame. Right… So wtf am I doing with my life? Here’s how Tim did it. One day Tim woke up and was like, “I want to build fully autonomous self driving cars”. No, not some half-arsed version like Tesla. Tim explains that by completely removing the steering wheel, driver’s seat and components needed for human driving, you can make a much more efficient self driving robot. A fully autonomous Uber – that was the dream. A slight problem was that Tim knew fuck all about self driving cars. But Tim was a hella smart guy who had started a successful graphics design company in the past, so he set about reading everything he could on self driving cars. After a year of intense study, he drew out some blueprints for his self driving car which he displayed at some conferences.His plans were given the honorable title of “Vaporware Horseshit” by critics. However, Tim hustled on and met Niki the venture capitalist who gave him a million dollars.Tim took that million dollars and went to the self driving car team at Apple. He said to them, “hey so you know… you guys are all screwed because Apple is shutting down their self driving car project. So come join me and we shall conquer the world.” And the self-driving car team is like, sure, seems legit, why not? Then Tim went to Lord Draper, the greatest venture capitalist of them all, and was like, “Hey I am building a self driving car and have the best team in the world to do it, you should give me 30 million dollars.” Draper thought for a while and then he’s like, sure why not? Tim took that money and convinced more people to join his jihad. Then he goes and raises 250m at a $1.5bn valuation. Tim does all this in 4 years.I set a small goal; build a coupon site. In 4 years I accomplished it. Tim set a big goal; make fully autonomous self driving cars. And in 4 years he has built a $1.5bn company.What would you rather be doing?If you could achieve anything, what would you be working on?WHAT ABOUT MONEY?When I was in college choosing my career, all I cared about was: how much money could I make? So I chose investment banking. And I quit after 6 months. But anyway. Most of my peer group chose their careers because of money. It wasn’t always like this. Back in the 60s, we had just landed on the moon. Einstein and Edison were the celebrities of the day. People wanted to be inventors, explorers and scientists – to work on things that would push forward the envelope of human progress. Nowadays people want money – financial security. What happened to changing the world? Most people are not working on meaningful problems. Millions are dying in Africa. Our best and brightest proceed to go work in finance or tech or whatever industry is the most cashed up.If you say that getting the money is the most important thing, you’ll spend your life completely wasting your time. You’ll be doing things you don’t like doing in order to go on living, that is to go on doing thing you don’t like doing, which is stupid. – Alan WattsBeing the richest man in the cemetery doesn’t matter to me. Going to be at night saying we’ve done something wonderful that’s what matters to me. – Steve JobsHere’s the thing: solving the world’s biggest problems is the best way to make money. This makes sense from an economics perspective. If you create the most value then the market will reward you with the most money. But wait, how the hell would working to solve poverty in Africa make more money than being an investment banker? Banking appears to be a steadier path to making more money – if we view things from a short term perspective. But what about in 10 years, 20 years and more?Most people overestimate what they can do in one year and underestimate what they can do in ten years– Bill GatesLet’s say you start a social enterprise in Africa. In your first year you make nothing and your banker friend makes $150k. In 10 years, your social enterprise does well enough for you to live comfortably. Meanwhile your friend is making $2m as a director. You wonder if you made the wrong choice. But in 20 years, Africa grows rapidly, income levels rise 20x to western levels. Business is booming because your customers can afford to pay you western prices. Everyone now wants to invest in Africa. Multinationals are in a bidding war to buy your company. The land that you brought for ten thousand dollars per hectare is now worth a one million dollars per hectare. You are now worth over $100m. Meanwhile the world realizes investment bankers are basically glorified real estate agents – annoying and unnecessary. Bankers and real estate agents get replaced by a super efficient AI marketplace and your friend is made redundant.BUT IT’S RISKYSure, chasing big goals is risky. People say that 9 out of 10 new ventures fail. Well, what if you tried 30 times? It’ll take about 4 months to see if a venture will work out, so you can try 3 new ventures a year. If you work on it for 10 years, you’ve tried 30 different ventures and you’re basically guaranteed success.How I got over risk of starting my own business was, I said to myself: even if I tried for the rest of my life and I died trying, would I be happy? Yes, because I enjoy the process of trying to change the world, building a business, and working on something I find meaningful. I can’t control if I will succeed or not. What matters is that I tried.It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat. – Franklin D RooseveltImagine at the end of your life, you realized that you never gave your dream a try. You just let it slip past. How would you feel?When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like, “If you live each day as if it were your last, someday you’ll most certainly be right.” It made an impression on me… and since then, for the past 33 years I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself, “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I’m about to do today.”And whenever the answer has been, “no” for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something. Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life.Because almost everything: all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure… these things just fall away in the face of death… leaving only what is truly important.Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart. – Steve JobsLIMITING BELIEFSPeople have all these limiting beliefs about why they can’t achieve their dreams. Like, I am not smart enough, I have a family to support, I am too old, I have a very needy cat.All these bullshit excuses. How do you know you can’t do something until you’ve tried? You don’t know. It’s much more useful to believe you can do anything, because then you’ll try. If you don’t try you fail by default.Those who are crazy enough to think they can change the world usually do– Steve JobsPeople seriously underestimate how far willpower can take you. It doesn’t matter where you come from or what your circumstances are. Got a family to support? Keep your day job and work on your dreams at night. Not smart enough? Spend twice as long studying. Too old? KFC was built by a 70 year old. You are not a victim of your circumstances.What are some things you want to achieve but feel like you can’t?YOU CAN DO ANYTHING YOU SET YOUR MIND TO MANIf there’s one story that demonstrates how far willpower will take you despite the hand you’ve been dealt, it’s that of Barrack Obama. No not the president, but his father Barrack Obama Sr.Obama Sr grew up in one of the poorest families in the world in Sub-Saharan Africa, but his son went on to become the most powerful man in the world. How did this happen?Obama Sr grew up in a Kenyan village. School was a little shanty hut where all the village children were packed into one class. Education sucked, but Obama Sr showed some spark. He had one thing going for him: he was able to learn English since grandfather Obama was a cook in a white household. One day, some aid workers came to visit their village. Teenage Obama Sr was like, “damn those aid workers looking fine, I think I’ll go chat them up.” The aid workers were impressed by Obama Sr’s drive and encouraged him to apply to the University of Hawaii’s African scholarship program. Barrack Sr studied intensely and with the tutorship of the aid workers managed to get the scholarship. At the University of Hawaii Obama Sr met Ann Dunham who would become Obama Jr’s mother. When he wasn’t chasing skirts, he managed to top his class and get a full scholarship into Harvard Law School. Willpower can get you from growing up in sub-Saharan Africa to going to Harvard Law School, to your son becoming the president of the United States.Now you may be thinking Obama Sr is smarter and more driven than I’ll ever be. He has better genetics. Just because he has achieved greatness doesn’t mean that I can. But are successful people really smarter than us? So I was in Silicon Valley last year doing a program called 500startups where I got to meet tech billionaires and industry leaders. It was surprisingly underwhelming… The advice these billionaires gave was mostly self indulgent, generic and useless details. “so I cooked lunch for my team everyday, and everyone loved my cooking”. “Ohh marketing, we didn’t do any marketing, the product just grew by itself”. The best advice I got was actually from other startup founders who were still hustling to make it. Then it struck me. These billionaires are not better than the rest of us. They’ve just worked hard and on the right things. But they’re fallible humans. We are all cut from the same cloth. I can do whatever they can do.Malcolm Gladwell writes about the 10,000 hour rule: how a master in any field has practiced for at least 10,000 hours. If we put in that amount of hours, we can master anything. Take Laszlo Polgar, a Hungarian psychologist who, after studying hundreds of great intellectuals, identified a common theme – early and intensive practice. He hypothesized that with intense practice, he could turn his three daughters into prodigies. He chose chess as the perfect activity to train his children in, because it was creative and analytical and had objectively measurable results. Two of his daughters went on to become grand-masters. No women had ever achieved the title of grand-master before. All three daughters ranked in the top 6 in the world for chess.Sure, we’re born with certain physical characteristics or elements of our personality that are hard to change. But the moment that we accept ourselves, take the wheel and start steering, that’s when things start happening. Take Lebron James vs Steph Curry. Lebron has the perfect genetic build for a basketball player. Steph doesn’t. He doesn’t have the height, he doesn’t have the bulk. But he doesn’t give a shit. He proceeds to practice the hell out of his shot. And with that, he has achieved a level of success to rival Lebron. You may not be able to change some part of yourself, but you can develop other parts and be just as effective.Cool, so I believe I can do anything I set my mind to. But…HOW DO I FIGURE OUT WHAT I WANT TO DO WITH MY LIFE?To discover your “why”, ask yourself these questions. Find the common denominators in the answers and you’ll have your first lead to explore in finding your why. The commonalities in your answers may point you towards your purpose, and give you some directions to explore.What do you think is biggest problem in the world right now?If money and time weren’t limiting factors, what would you allow yourself to dream of doing?What makes you feel angry, or rise up at the injustice you see?What gets your emotions going? what brings tears to your eyes?What makes you happy?– Daniel Flynn, founder Thankyou WaterREADRead. Do a shit tonne of reading, and then read some more. There are world leaders and billionaires who have spent years distilling the best of their life’s wisdom and principles of success into books. Books that we can access instantly for $10 on Amazon. It’s the digital age. We are the first generation to have the entire trove of human knowledge available on demand in our pockets.Yet most of us don’t read. What the fuck? Instead we spend our time watching TV. What did Kim K name her kid? Did North Korea fire another rocket? What happens next on Game of Thrones? All this bullshit that we don’t need to know about. Our newest drug addiction is social media. It gives us a hit of validation, a new like, another viral video. But there’s no substance, no meaning. The short term hit leaves us shallow inside and longing for another, and another. Popular media is fucking up our brains. It’s the information age buffet. Because we’re fat fucks from the first world, we say, give me all the junk food, broccoli can fuck off. We need to treat the information we consume like food and watch we’re putting into our bodies.LISTEN TO AUDIO-BOOKSThe best life hack that anyone has ever told me is to listen to audio-books at 2x speed. You can listen to audio-books whilst you’re at the gym, or driving, or any other mindless task. This way, it’s easy to find 2-3 hours everyday, and if you do, you can finish 2 books every week, and 100 books a year. 100 books will put you miles ahead. Most people don’t even finish 100 books in their lifetime. I started audio-books 3 years ago, and I’ve learnt more in 3 years than I have in the rest of my life combined. School didn’t teach me useful skills, books did. Books written by people who have done it before. You can get most popular titles on Amazon’s Audible book store. Make sure you select the USA Audible store as this has the widest selection.WHAT SHOULD I READ?Check the New York Times best sellers list. Ask mentors what their favorite books are. Google for book recommendations by Bill Gates, Mark Zuckerberg or other people you respect.Here’s a list of my favorite books:The Power of Now by Eckhart TolleThe Fountainhead by Ayn RandSelf Compassion by Kirstin NeffThe Four Agreements by Don Miguel RuizThe Singularity is Near by Ray KurtzweilCrucial Conversations by Kerry PattersonThe Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck by Mark Manson100 book recommendations FIND MENTORSAfter reading and researching what I wanted to do. I got in touch with people who’ve done it before. No matter what you’re trying to achieve, there are 7 billion people in the world and there are people out there who have done similar things to what you’re attempting to do. Find these people on Linkedin and ask for their mentorship. Ask people who are not your direct competitors, people in a different geography or who have moved onto something else. You’d be surprised at how many people respond. I got around a 30% response rate. Here’s an email that I sent.Hi John,I am Rob, an Australian tech entrepreneur linkedin.com/in/robliu. We’re building contactout.com a recruitment tool similar to Connectifier but targeting the Australian and UK markets.I would greatly appreciate your mentorship and advice on growth and how to do sales for recruitment tools, and any insights you’ve gained from your experience at Connectifier.Would you be free for a brief chat on Skype? Happy to send you $500 for your time.Kind Regards, Rob LiuJohn was previously VP Marketing at Connectifier, a competitor whose business model I was trying to copy. John came on board as an adviser and helped me add over one million dollars in value to my business. It all started with an email.When emailing, bribe people. Offer them $500 to talk to you. This makes it look like you’re serious about your request and respectful of their time. Most mentors are rich already and won’t accept your money. For people who do accept your money, don’t bother talking with them. Because if they need $500, then they’re probably not very successful, and would make a shitty mentor.After reading, researching, finding mentors, you’ll still have to figure out a lot of the journey by yourself. You’re aiming to do something great and that involves blazing a path into the unknown. It’s like playing soccer. You can read all about soccer tactics, you can practice dribbling, practice kicking. But if you want to get good at soccer, you need to get out onto the field and play the game. Think for yourself, follow your heart, and take action.You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something – your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. Because believing that the dots will connect down the road will give you the confidence to follow your heart even when it leads you off the well worn path; and that will make all the difference. – Steve JobsYOU ARE ON THIS EARTH FOR A REASON.We’re here to put a dent in the universe. Otherwise why else even be here?– Steve Jobs“Are you a born writer? Were you put on earth to be a painter, a scientist, an apostle of peace? In the end the question can only be answered by action.Do it or don’t do it.It may help to think of it this way. If you were meant to cure cancer or write a symphony or crack cold fusion and you don’t do it, you not only hurt yourself, even destroy yourself,. You hurt your children. You hurt me. You hurt the planet.You shame the angels who watch over you and you spite the Almighty, who created you and only you with your unique gifts, for the sole purpose of nudging the human race one millimeter farther along its path back to God.Creative work is not a selfish act or a bid for attention on the part of the actor. It’s a gift to the world and every being in it. Don’t cheat us of your contribution. Give us what you’ve got.”– Steven Pressfield

[sarcasticlykaeon-blog]

Caught Between Worlds

Stuck. Thats how it felt, every hour of every day, for as long as I could remember. Like i was some sort of freak, on the outside looking in. I can remember when i was small, barely old enough to really walk and talk, two and a half, three...and i hated dresses. I hated pink. I hated lace and frills. If i could choose or make my will known it was pants. Tshirts and sweatshirts. Childrens overalls. I hated games in preschool. The girls always wanted to play house, with husbands and babies in some sort of elaborate roleplay. The boys wouldnt let me play with them. "No girls," theyd say. "You wont know how," or "girls arent any good at this. Go play with dolls." somehow...just because i didnt have the same lower regions i wasnt good enough. So i played alone, with blocks or toys, making up elaborate adventures or stories in the process. My mother, my aunts, my grandmother...they all wanted me to be a girl. They tried to take me underwing in baking, playing with makeup, dressup, dolls...they tried to teach me about playing with hair. Me? I just wanted to test out the new computer, watch ninja turtles, and kick butt like she-ra. My one concession to female marketed programs was Jem...but honestly? I loved the story and drama, not the glamour, glitter, fashion, or fame. I was the oldest...five years between me and my brother meant i was dads son substitute until i was almost 11. I learned things like changing the oil in a car, ms-dos programming and how to kick ass in Doom, how to tackle and fight back if grabbed by a bigger opponent. Of course...the instant my middle brother was old enough to do son things....fwip! I was ignored. About the only thing i could get the old man to do was D&D. My grandfather insisted it was a phase i would grow out of, that id become a seeker of a strong man and an actual woman eventually. My mother tried to force me to conform to gender standards. My aunt was disappointed. My father only started caring about gender normativity when i hit puberty. I never told them things like "i want to grow up to be a boy" because even at three, i knew it didnt work that way, on some instinctual level. But i dod wail and growl about the unfairness. Why is x okay for boys but not girls? Why are girls expected to be like this but boys arent? And the answer...oh the answer just upset me and angered me. "Because youre expected to be a young lady." By puberty, the words "young lady" were guarenteed to trigger a huge emotional fit of rage...but i couldnt explain why. Just like the fact that i had to fight for my place amidst whatever boys lived in the neighborhood. I had to work twice as hard to prove i was worthy of being allowed to hang out...and still they sought to ditch me at every opportunity. School was even worse. I was overly tall, strong, and hyper intelligent. I was part of the "Gifted Program" (which in most school systems is naught but busy work or a careful way to set up classes in high school to fix the averages of a class.) I was, in every concievable way the outcast. And then puberty found me. Early. The first time i bled in sixth grade, i cried myself to sleep, hiding blood ruined underwear in the back of my closet until i could throw it away. I didnt tell my mother until i was sixteen--hiding this horrid, agonizingly painful thing that happened to me once a month. When i grew breasts i hated them. I hated bras. And of course, i have breasts that grew huge. I survive with super tight sports bras and tshirts because nothing else fits my fucked up frame: ive got broad shoulders, long legs, and huge feet (size 12 womens, which is impossible to find), and im like 5'8". Id be taller but my arms and torso are short, and ive got wide hips and huge breasts and butt. I hated my body and i still do. I feel like i was a crapshoot built out of the mismatched leftovers of several people. And the shit my parents tried to enforce for gender conformity to this "new identity of a young lady." first was acne management. I wasnt a pizza face, but i did and still do have a bit of an issue with blackheads (Glasses have that effect.) But my parents tried to force me to pop my zits...and when i refused because it hurt, they basically held me down and popped them for me. Then was "shaving my legs". Okay. Underarms i get because pits stink. I shave those because it feels less stanky when i do. But their issue? My legs. I refused to do it. "Boys dont, why do i? Thats not fair!" i fought. Hard. But...like the zits...theyd hold me down and buzz my legs for me from knee to foot while i thrashed and begged...all to force on me a title i never wanted, a mold i didnt fit. And i didnt understand WHY. Why was my behavior, my life and interests and hobbies and clothing all supposed to be dictated by something so unimportant? And then...when i was sixteen, i met a person i hit it off with. A sweet and funny youth my age with hair as long as mine and a goofy smile on his face. In a few months we were dating long distance and i suspect my family sighed in relief that i wasnt a lesbian. Our fathers got to be friends(which was useful, since 200miles between us put a crimp in relations.) But this had another side effect. You see, that next year i learned something id never heard before. Something id never considered until that day in 2002. His father...felt he was a woman trapped in a mans body. I was floored. This could happen? What? So i researched what i could to understand (there wasnt much, back then.) And...i began to wonder....because all I could find was for males becoming females. Even joked with my boyfriend that the universe "got us backwards" (he agreed, seeing as how he was girlier than me) And then it all crashed to a halt one night at dinner. His father, him, me, another mtf person and two other adults were at a restaurant, and the kne guy at the table with no knowledge on trans folks was asking questions. I listened, enraptured as the emotions and disconnects id always felt were described from the other side. Emboldened, 17, and perhaps seeking some form of connection or...validation for my feelings, i piped up, expressing how i felt the universe had gotten me backwards. That was the worst thing to say, as his father unloaded on me verbally for being mocking and insensitive and jumping on a bandwagon i had no business on. Treated me like i was being scum--damn near drove me to tears and made me feel small and useless. And i thought "if this is what trans ppl are like...i dont want to be like them ever." it crushed my desire to understand my gender identity and sexuality for years. It didnt help that as time went by ot seemed every trans person i encountered was one of two things: a dramawhore with the emotional stability of a 14year old girl, or someone like my bf's father who decided that i couldnt belong to his elitest club in a fashion that echoed years of "no girls allowed" from boys everywhere. The internets vast collection of professionally offended "keyboard warriors" who spew bigotry and hate and small minded idiocy while calling it "truth" or "just what X group deserves" is a steaming cesspit of shit I dont want to be part of on any level, and unfortunately many of them claim to be whatever "alternate" gender identity or sexuality is the fad this month. Its not winning me over at all, and made me shy further away from actual people i might be able to relate to...maybe who can help me. I finally did own up to something when i was 23--I was more sexually attracted to women than men. In fact...beyond a few emotion driven crushes as a teen, the only male i have ever found attractive was that same goofy, funny, smiling boy with the long hair...except these days hes my supportive, goofy, smiling mate with the softest heart of gold ive ever known inside a powerful and intimidatingly sized viking-esque exterior. But again...because on the outside, our relationship seems very "normal" im not welcomed much by the vocal minority and so im super wary of all parts of the lgbt crowd. I dont advertise or tell my relatives--my parents and their respective siblings are between 50 and 70 years old. They barely believe this stuff exists. I still dont want to be a girl. I dont want the societal expectations of it. I hate having breasts that risk knocking my teeth loose if i move too fast. And dont get me started on the fucking shit show that is my sex life. Its a complicated shit show that starts with the disconnect of parts and ends with kinks i can never actually engage in because, guess what? Im a GIRL. But at the same time, i stare at the only transmen examples and stories i can find, which seem to be rare and hidden somewhere, at places like fb and tumblr and twitter...at pride rallies and news stories...at stuff recounted by friends...and i dont want to be associated with people whose actions turn them into examples of literal human garbage. And so here i sit, caught between two worlds, never part of either one and feeling like im slowly drowning. It seems like one doesnt want me and the other i dont want... Im so tired of being stuck.