#sel- my-land

[sparklecryptid]

I think it would be very funny if Sel wound up with Luche and Tredd

Because it would be

Hilarious

[selvepnea]

My mug :(

[crimsonvictory]

You don’t know when it started exactly, but Sundays were your favorite day of the week. For a few reasons:

one; it was your day off

two; you always lose count of how many times you come in the evenings

It had been a long week, work tensing your muscles into knots, your shoulders squeezing tight with unrelieved stress that had slowly built up each day.

To no relief, you just couldn’t seem to get the knots to loosen under your soft skin. The tension causing many a headache and irritation to leach into your pretty face. You had tried just about everything, stretches, self-massages, yoga, but nothing touched it. Almost as if your body just didn’t trust itself to relax.

The only time you would ever get a little relief was with a scalding bath and a little one on one time with your favorite toy. You never really had the time for one, occasionally once a week, which just wasn’t enough to soothe your aching body. So, when the time did roll around, you were more than eager to step into your routine and unwind from your busy schedule.

That is, until a certain someone interrupted your special day, coming back home from a mission early without notification. You were glad he was home, but damn if your shoulders didn’t tense up tighter towards your ears at the thought of not having the bathroom to yourself. Simon obviously needed a shower, stuck on a plane for nearly two days and in the car for who knows how many hours.

You sighed softly, starting to pick up your self-care items and haphazardly throw them in a wicker basket off to the side.

“Y’alright?” he asked softly, peaking around the half closed door.

Maybe you threw them a little too harshly. You take a moment to calm yourself, cheeks blazing with unbridled rage as you stare past him and into your shared bedroom.

“Mhm,” you hum softly, eyes not meeting his.

“Lovie,” he prods softly, the sweet pet name catching your attention.

Your eyes flick over to meet his own, dark gaze unwavering as he stands in the doorway. You notice that he’s already unmasked, hair sticking up messily from pulling the balaclava off. There’s still a bit of unprocessed events swirling around, a bit of ochre starting to peak through now that he’s home.

Home. Safe with you.

“I was just about to leave,” you explain, towel still sitting on your shoulder.

“Doesn’ look like it,” he states matter of factly.

So, he caught you up, called your bluff. What was he going to do about it? You let out a soft huff, setting your mouth in a fake smile as you lay your towel down on the counter, turning around to grab the laundry hamper that you had been ignoring for days.

You rest it on your hip, raising an eyebrow as a silent suggestion for him to move. He doesn’t. You follow his eyes, watching as they drift from the wicker basket, to the towel on the counter and finally land on the small toy you have resting on the edge of the tub. Your face heats again and you take a side step, trying to hide it from his view. What’s the point? He’s already seen it.

“Am I interruptin’?” he asks softly, gaze settling back on you.

“No,” you sigh softly. “Like I said, I was about to start on this laundry.”

You go to move again and he tuts softly, the sound stopping you in your tracks.

“If you need some space, coulda jus’ told me.”

You look up at him then, cheeks still burning pink as tears prick in your eyes. Your stomach clenches - guilt swirling around as you process what he just said. The feeling makes your lip wobble and you turn your head for a moment, gathering yourself.

“I’m sorry, Si,” you start. “It’s just been a rough week and I wasn’t expectin’ you home.”

“S’alright,” he states. “I didn’ call.”

You huff a laugh at that, turning back to look at him again. He looks tired, eyeblack mostly rubbed from his eyes but still lingerin’ in the corners. Your sweet Simon. Always checkin’ on you first before himself. You decided to extend the offer this time.

“Would you want to join me?” you ask.

He raises an eyebrow in question.

“Sundays are my self-care days. I usually take a hot bath and…” you trail off, tips of your ears burning as you see how Simon catches on.

His lips stretch into a grin, showin’ off his sharp teeth. Arms folded over his broad chest, he leans against the doorframe, head nearly smackin’ the threshold. A soft laugh falls from his lips.

“Y’want me to take a bath with ya?”

You nod slowly, a small smile on your face.

“Alrigh’,” he agrees, pushing the door farther open to step inside.

Your smile stretches wider and you set the laundry basket down before turning to grab all of your self-care routine from where it was thrown. Grabbing two towels and washcloths, you lay them over the towel rack near the tub before leaning over and starting the water. The knob is a little finicky and you stick two fingers under the water until it is a desired temp.

While the water fills, you twist open your favorite bubble bath - eucalyptus scented - and pour some in, watching it swirl around in the porcelain tub. The smell of it already has your shoulders relaxing and you let out a soft sigh. For good measure, you add a cup of epsom salts - more for Simon than you.

He stands quietly, watching you flit around the small room as you get everything ready. A small smile rests on his face, chest squeezin’ at the sight of you. You turn towards him finally, face a little flushed and a few pieces of hair stuck to your face.

“Ready?” you ask, gaze expectant.

He nods and you smile, reaching down by your hips to pull your cotton shirt over your head before dropping it into the laundry basket. A low hum rumbles in his chest, appreciatin’ the way your breasts bounce back to their resting position. Simon then follows suit, grabbing the arm of his shirt to pull it off in one swooping motion. You never know how he manages to do that so efficiently.

Next is your pants, you shimmy them down your hips and into the basket they go. Left in just your cotton panties, you turn towards the tub to turn the faucet off. You don’t have a chance to stand back up due to the firm press of Simon against your back.

“Si!” you huff, an incredulous laugh leaving your lips.

“Missed ‘ya birdie,” he mumbles into your shoulder.

His large hand paws at your hip, squeezin’ at the bit of fat there and pulling your ass back flush against his hips. The warmth of his body radiates off him in waves - always burnin’ hot no matter the time of year. A shiver of arousal runs down your spine, feeling his cock already straining against his pants.

It sends slick drippin’ down into your panties, his touch itching the relentless scratch you had developed since he had been gone. You hadn’t seen him in weeks - sweet body just tremblin’ with want. This is what you had needed. Simon places a chaste kiss to your overheating skin - all knowing - a soft hum leaving his lips.

He spins you around, sliding his large hand up to brush the soft skin under your breasts. Your nipples perk up at his touch, hardening into little buds. A soft whine leaves your lips, knees feelin’ like jelly. He leans down then, latching his lips around one. His mouth is hot - captivating as he swirls his tongue around - the pleasure pooling hot in your belly. You arch up into his touch, hand coming up to grasp at his large bicep and givin’ it a squeeeeeze.

He chuckles softly, releasing your tit with a ‘pop’ before placing wet kisses up the side of your neck. His sharp teeth graze against your collarbone before he bites down, causin’ you to yelp. The stinging pain is over in a moment, soothed by his tongue.

He steps back then, the warmth of him gone as he releases you. A soft whine crawls up your throat - pathetic. You watch the way his cock jumps at the noise - only imagining the pearly precome that coats the tip. Simon shimmies out of his tact pants and boxers, his thick cock swellin’ up against his belly.

The tip is a pretty pink, shiny with iridescence. He curves up to the right just a bit - makes your mouth water. Simon tuts softly, rough hand circling around his length before giving a couple tugs. You watch his thighs tremble. Your hand reaches out to circle around his own, watching between the two of you as they move - up, down, up, down, up.

“Christ,” he grits out, voice strained.

You huff out a laugh, feelin’ the way he grows impossibly bigger in your hand. Subtle moans and sighs fall from Simon’s pretty lips. Your panties are stickin’ to your folds, arousal drippin’ down your leg.

“Missed you…” you murmur, lookin’ up through your lashes.

He moans softly at his pretty girl - the way she looks at him, like he placed the sun. Simon’s cock twitches again and he stills his hand, suckin’ in air through his teeth.

“Okay?” you ask softly.

He nods. “Can’t be lookin’ at me like tha’.”

You laugh again, smile breaking out on your face before you can help it. You’re gorgeous. Simon doesn’t realize it but he’s smiling too. The tension is thick in the air, the steam of the bath foggin’ up the mirrors. You had almost forgot, wanting nothing other than Simon in the moment. Uncurling your fingers from around him, you quickly pull your panties down before beckoning him to join you in the bath.

You step in, the hot water feeling wonderful against your skin. Not sitting down yet, you let Simon step in behind you so you can sit between his legs. He huffs, the water scalding against his overworked muscles. A sigh leaves his lips as he relaxes back against the cool porcelain.

How the two of you fit in there is a miracle. Simon’s hulking frame nearly taking up the whole tub. You squirm in between his legs, resting your back against his chest. A comfortable silence rests between you for a moment. You dip your arms in the water, cupping your hands and splashing water up on your face, taking the washcloth and tracing your features smoothly. The excess water drips down the cloth and into the bath.

“Your turn,” you murmur, turning around and resting your elbows on Simon’s chest.

He grumbles softly, eyes fluttering shut as you run the warm washcloth over his face. You take him in - your Simon - more beautiful every time you see him. The furrow between his brow softens, face relaxing underneath your touch. You smooth the cloth over his eyes, removing the rest of the eyeblack. His closed lids flutter, following the movement of your soft hands.

One rests on his cheek, your thumb gently petting his face. So soft - his chest squeezes again. You’re so good to him. Breaking down the barriers and crawling inside. He couldn’t get you to leave if he tried. Your plush lips place soft kisses on his face - his eyelids, his cheeks, his nose, before brushing over his lips. A swipe of your tongue startles him.

You laugh then, smiling against his lips. Simon’s arm darts out, snaking around your waist and pullin’ you impossibly close. You drape the washcloth over the side of the tub, bringing your other hand up to his face before smashing your lips to his. He groans against your mouth and you take the opportunity to slip your tongue inside, exploring.

He tastes like he always does - a hint of cigarette and Earl Grey. Your stomach flutters with want, devouring him with each swipe of your tongue.

Simon’s right hand sneaks down between the two of you, thick fingers rolling’ your buds into stiff peaks. You moan hotly into his mouth, arms tremblin’ against his chest. The cool air makes you shiver when he finally pulls away.

You huff softly against his check, having pulled away for a moment. A smirk pulls one side up - bastard. You place a quick kiss to his cheek, sitting up for a moment to grab your exfoliation scrub before he has a chance to complain. You open up the cap, dipping your fingers into the jar before scooping up a dollop and placing it on Simon’s face.

“What’s tha’?”, he mumbles.

“Exfoliator.”

He huffs softly but you shush him with a few kisses. Leaning back ever so slightly, you swirl the exfoliant softly around his skin - the crystals picking up any dirt leftover. With many convincing kisses, Simon lets you finish and wipe his face clean.

The skin is super soft, you smooth your thumb over before bringing his own hand up.

“Feel,” you tell him.

His fingers brush over his own face, surprised by the smoothness there.

“Not bad,” he concedes.

You smile, and to your surprise, Simon grabs the container and returns the favor to you. His thick fingers aren’t as delicate as your own, bumping up against your nose or knocking your chin. You can’t help but laugh, the gesture sweet. He lets you rinse your face before leaning up and capturing your lips again.

Simon’s pulled you into his lap, sloshin’ water everywhere. His hands slide up and down your waist, your back, your arms - anywhere he can touch - committing you to memory. He’s growing desperate, wanting to keep you close. You feel his cock twitchin’ against your folds, wanting desperately to roll your hips down against his own.

The two of you are in no rush though, languidly kissing and running your hands over the expanse of each other’s bodies. Simon’s got both hands splayed under your breasts, tongue swirling around your nipples again. He sucks the bud into his mouth, alternating between the two - nippin’ and kissin’ until they’re puffy again.

You whine, shuddering against the pleasure. Simon knows just how to crack that tension in your body. You feel it slowly leak from your muscles, shoulders finally relaxing after such a long time. Tears well up in your eyes at the relief. The head of his cock is bumping against your clit in a delicious way - every time you squirm a sizzle of pleasure licks up your spine.

“Missed you Si,” you sigh again, voice wobbly with tears.

He squeezes your ribs softly, thumb brushing over your peaked nipple and you come. It’s sudden - you weren’t expecting it, but the pleasure burns fast, taking you by surprise. You gasp, eyes rollin’ in the back of your head as it takes over your body.

A few tears fall down your face, rolling down your neck and mixing with the condensation accumulated on your body.

“Tha’s it,” Simon murmurs into your skin, coaxing you through your orgasm, soothing circles being drawn on your skin.

You tremble, the after effects slowly subsiding. Your chest rises and falls, breathing slowing after a few moments. The comfortable silence stretches again and your hands slide up into Simon’s hair, running your fingers back and forth over his scalp. Your nails scratch softly, havin’ him practically purrin’ in your lap.

Simon rests his forehead on your chest, stretchin’ his neck - yearnin’ for more of your touch. He’s just as starved as you. His large arms circle around your back, caging you in close. You pet his head, fingers soothing as they run down his neck and over his broad shoulders.

Water droplets pool on his scarred skin. Your fingers trace over them, feeling Simon relax in your touch. You’re more than grateful that you can be a safe space for him. That he allows himself to open up to you. You smile, pressing a kiss to his head. Glad that he has returned home safe yet again.

“Si?” you murmur.

“Hm?” he grumbles, sounding nearly half asleep.

“I’m glad you came home.”

He squeezes you then, placing soft kisses up your neck before nippin’ at your jaw.

“Couldn’ leave my pretty bird all alone.”

You feel him twitch against you again, desire rolling off of him in waves. He moves, adjusting himself to sit back against the tub, having you on full display in his lap. Simon’s thumb pads softly at the little pearl between your legs, watching in delight as your thighs start to tremble.

Your breath hitches in your throat, arousal causing your eyelids to droop. The roughness of his fingers are delicious against your velvety folds, creating the perfect friction. You clench around nothing, biting down on your pretty plush lips.

“Pretty girl,” he praises. “My pretty girl.”

Your chest clenches at his words, tears pooling in your eyes again as your second orgasm bubbles up. Eyes fluttering closed, you let the pleasure seep into your body, feeling yourself grow taught and then relax as the endorphins release.

A laugh leaves your lips, followed by a soft moan from Simon. Your eyes flutter open, focusing on the man below you. His eyes are dark, gaze sharp and unwavering as he watches you unravel before him. He takes pride in that - watching his little bird come undone before him - knowin’ he’s the one that caused it. Makes him hornier than ever - his own little slice of heaven sittin’ right in his lap.

You blush, the warmth traveling down your chest - shy at his gaze.

“Don’t hide from me birdie,” he coos, thumb swipin’ over your clit again.

It’s a bit overstimulating, causin’ your hips to jump. The head of his cock brushes through your slick folds, pulling a groan from the both of you. You place your hands on his wide chest, pleadin’. He knows what you want - decides not to be mean this time and just gives it to you.

Simon angles your hips, the tip catching against your fluttering hole. You gasp as he pushes inside, the girth of him stretching you open.

“Fuuuuck,” he groans. “Such a tight little thing.”

Your breath stutters and Simon slows, petting your hip softly as he waits for you to relax.

“Relax f’me pretty. C’mon you can take it.”

His sweet words have you clenchin’ around his cock, sucking him in deeper. A laugh punches out of Simon’s lungs.

“There we go,” he praises. “Such a good girl f’me.”

Your walls stretch around his cock, fluttering every time he sinks deeper. You’re tremblin’ by the time your hips are flush with his own.

“Yessss,” he hisses, squeezing your hip.

You take a couple of deep breaths, the burn subsiding and blooming into pleasure. It sits deep in your belly, begging him to move.

“Please,” you beg.

That’s all you had to say. Asked so nicely. His pretty girl. So perfect. Simon pulls out nearly all the way before slamming back inside. The motion has water sloshing everywhere, making a mess of the floor. You don’t care, the pleasure makin’ you mewl. You’re clawing at his shoulders, holding onto them as his cock spears you open.

“Fuck Si,” you moan, squeezing him.

You watch his eyes roll languidly over to you, pupils blown, fucking pussydrunk. Simon was gone, lost in the pleasure you were milking from him. Jaw slack, practically droolin’ over how good you felt. It makes your pussy flutter, watching his eyes glaze over in pleasure.

He fucks you good, knowing which way to angle your hips to pull out those pretty sounds. Throat nearly raw from them crawling up. Your pretty tits bounce with each thrust, head falling back as he hits your cervix.

You’re ramblin’ words of praise, pleasure foggin’ your pretty head. Simon’s cock bullying its way in and out of your puffy hole. It’s euphoric, every inch bringing you closer to your peak. You can tell he’s close too, the sporadic jump of his hips against your ass. He pulls you flush for a moment, stilling as he grabs your jaw, pulling you down to kiss you messily.

Tongue prying your lips apart as he licks inside, wanting to devour you whole. Simon’s hips stutter again before he pulls back, slamming back in as he bites down on your lip. You clench around his cock, gasping as pleasure overtakes you once again.

It burns, but burns so good, nerves overstimulated with another orgasm. Your muscles squeeeeze taught, tremblin’ with overexertion. Arms shaking, you fall against Simon’s chest. His own wrap tighter around your waist, holding you close as he fucks up into you - chasin’ his own pleasure.

You whine, the head of his cock slamming into your dripping cunt over and over until his hips finally still, pumpin’ you full of his come. Simon bites down on your shoulder, muffling his moans. You’re both panting, chests rising and falling in tandem.

Simon smoothes a hand over your back, patting softly as he slowly pulls out. Another whine crawls up your throat when he’s no longer inside. He sighs, tilting his head back against the tub again.

“God I missed you.”

You squeeze him tight.

“I know.”

[jobean12-blog]

Dressed to Impress

Pairing: Joel Miller x reader (Pre/No!Outbreak)

Word Count: 3,057

Summary: You and Sarah manage to convince Joel to dress up for Halloween. He's not too excited about it but agrees anyway. However, once he see's your costume...Halloween jus tmight be his new favorite holiday.

Author's Note: This is part of my kinktober celebration and the PPCU Halloween event. Thank you bunches to Sel @jupiter-soups and Harley @huffle-punk for setting it up! 💕💕love and hugs! I took two prompts; one from fluff: You and Sarah convince Joel to dress up for Halloween. He isn't thrilled. And one from smut: You surprise Joel by dressing up for Halloween as something that he has mentioned finding sexy. For the second prompt I didn't get specific because I figured it would be more fun for the reader to imagine their own sexy costume- whatever you wear- Joel LOVES it. I also want to thank my dear friends @flordeamatista and @mrsmischief209 for helping me with Joel's costume, you're both amazing! ❤️💕Thank you all so much for reading and much love always! ❤️❤️❤️

Warnings: it's fun and fluffy, silly and soft, lots of flirting and tension, Joel is sweet but definitely grumpy, reader has some sass, semi-public f-in-g-e-ri-ng, light d-ir-t-y talk, it's a whole ride lol

Kinktober 2023 Masterlist

Joel Miller Masterlist

“No.”

His hands land on his hips as he stares back at you.

“But Joel, it’ll be…”

Your words are cut off by his second, “no.”

“Joel!” you whine.

“Darlin’,” he warns.

You stick your bottom lip out in a pout and give him your best sad eyes.

“Still no,” he says.

You change tactics.

With a sweet smile you step into his space and press yourself against him.

“I know it’s not your favorite idea but don’t you want to do it for me? Make me happy?”

His hands falls from his hips and land on yours, pulling you closer.

“Now you’re playin’ dirty angel.”

Your lips curve into a wicked smile. “I can play much dirtier than this if you want.”

You lift your fingers to his hair and comb them through, lightly scratching his scalp before they slide down the back of his neck and trace his jaw.

With a light brush of your lips you whisper, “please Joel. Just this once. I promise it’ll be worth it.”

You kiss him before he can answer and you feel his low growl rumble through his chest as he pushes you against the wall of the bedroom.

With rushed hands you pull at his tee shirt, tugging it up and over his head. Your fingers caress his warm skin as his lips kiss and nip at your neck.

“Joel,” you moan.

He grabs your thigh, lifting it to spread you open so he can settle between you legs.

“Now who’s playing dirty,” you gasp when you feel his hardness press into your stomach.

His hand slides higher and his fingers dip into the waistband of your leggings.

“You started it,” he murmurs.

“Is that a yes then?” you ask, trying to keep your voice steady as his fingers tease your skin.

His cell phone rings before he can answer and you both let out a frustrated groan.

“One guess who’s callin’,” he grumbles.

He grabs his phone from his jeans pocket and flips it open, his eyes never leaving yours.

“Hey,” he says which you follow right after with, “hey tommy,” loud enough so he can hear it on the other end of the line.

Joel reluctantly releases you and takes a step back but his intense gaze tracks your every move while you fix your clothes.

As you start to walk out of the room you sing out, “since you didn’t say no that time, I’m going to take it as a maybe!”

Before you get out of the doorway he comes up behind you and smacks your ass, making you squeal. His arm wraps around your waist and he drags your back to his bare chest, his soft breath tickling your ear when he whispers, “a maybe.”

You can hear Tommy on the other end of the line asking what the hell is going and when you look over your shoulder Joel’s eyes are dark, his ‘maybe’ and so much more hanging in the air between you both.   

“How many times did he say no?” Sarah asks the moment you walk into the kitchen.

“Only three times,” you smile.

She blows out a raspberry and stabs her eggs with her fork.

“BUT!” you continue. “I think I’ve got him at a maybe now and if you lay it on thick we might be able to convince him.”

Sarah smiles deviously and when you hear Joel’s heavy footfalls on the stairs you both straighten your shoulders in preparation.

“Hey dad,” Sarah chimes brightly when he walks in.

You match her smile and offer him a hot cup of fresh coffee.

He looks between you both, his lips pursed and his eyes narrowed.

“Don’t even try…” he begins.

“BUT DAD,” Sarah interjects, “we all have to dress up. You can’t come trick or treating otherwise!”

“Who said I wanna go trick or treating?,” he says before sipping his coffee.

Both you and Sarah give him a stern look.

“YOU HAVE TO!” you both shout.

He sighs and sits down at the table.

“PLEASE,” Sarah says. “We can think of something awesome for you to dress up as.”

“I already have an idea,” you say, clasping your hands together in excitement. “You’ll look amazing.”

You wink at Sarah and she grins before turning pleading eyes to Joel.

You grab your plate and seat yourself on Joel’s spread thigh, curling into him and grabbing his fork to feed him a bite of eggs.

“Please,” you say softly.

Joel studies your face before he moves his eyes to Sarah.

“Fine,” he mumbles then takes the bite of eggs off the fork.

You and Sarah let out an excited cheer. Sarah hops out of her seat and comes around the table to kiss Joel’s cheek. You do the same on the other side.

He grumbles out something unintelligible but you can see the smile playing upon his lips.

“See you guys later,” Sarah says as she grabs her schoolbag and rushes toward the door.

Just before she’s out of the house she turns back and looks at Joel to say, “your tee shirt’s inside out.” Then she disappears out the door.

You giggle into your hand but quickly press your lips together to suppress any further joy when Joel pins you with a glare.

“Shit,” he says, looking down.

“Oops,” you say with feigned innocence and a shrug of your shoulders.

With a smug smile you hold up the fork again. “You have to eat more before you’re late.”

He looks up and takes the bite but then removes the fork from your hand.

“Oh I plan on it darlin’,” he simpers.

He swats at your ass until you get up and then promptly moves the dishes over and sits you on the edge of the table.

“Joel…” you breathe out as your arms wrap around his neck.

Just as his thumbs hook into your leggings you hear the loud clunk and roll of Tommy’s truck.

“Ah fuck,” Joel sighs, dropping his face to your neck.

You let out a little whimper and cling to him.

“Later,” he promises before kissing you softly.

Tommy barges in all smiles.

“Hey you two,” he greets.

Joel mumbles some form of a greeting and you go give Tommy a hug.

Tommy gives you a squeeze then looks to Joel. “What up his ass?”

“He agreed to dress up for Halloween this year,” you answer happily.

Tommy grins and walks over to Joel, slapping him on the back. “Shit brother, your girls can get you to do anything huh?”

You do a little happy victory dance as you place the dishes in the sink.

“Come on,” Joel says to Tommy, “let’s go.”

“What about my breakfast?” Tommy asks, checking the pan.

“We’ll pick you somethin’ up on the road,” Joel sighs.

You gently pat Tommy on the back. “There would have been pancakes but we’re out of mix.”

Tommy gives you a lopsided smile and then grabs the last piece of toast.

“See you later babe,” Tommy says before he heads back out to the truck.

He takes one last look at Joel, the toast dangling between his fingers as he points and says, “your tee shirt’s inside out.”

With another muttered curse Joel grabs the back of his shirt and pulls it over his head.

He stalks toward you at the counter, caging you against it with his arms on either side of your body.

“You,” he whispers as he leans in and bumps his nose along yours, “are all mine when I get home.”

“Is all this gel really necessary?” he asks as you run your fingers through his hair for the hundredth time.

You stand between his spread legs and look him over, adjusting a piece of hair here and there.

“Yes. It is,” you state. “Eeeeeee Joel!”

After wiping your hands you check his bow tie, pulling on the ends to tighten it before you straighten it again.

“PERFECT! Sarah get in here!”

You grab Joel’s hand and drag him to his feet. Sarah rushes in and immediately gives out a loud ‘whoop’ before laughing.

“Dad this is so good,” she says. “You look just like Gomez!”

Joel turns to look in the mirror, his expression full of his usual grumpiness.

“Well, you’ve already got the grumpy look down perfectly,” you tease.

He just scoffs as he lifts his fingers to touch his hair.

“DON’T!” you tell him. “Just leave it!”

“You look amazing,” you tell Sarah. “Super scary.”

Sarah smiles and does a twirl to show off the full affect of her costume.

“You look great sweetheart,” Joel says before his eyes slide back to you.

“What about you darlin’? Where’s your costume?” he asks.

“Oh, I’m going to get ready now,” you say with a twinkle of your fingers. “See you downstairs.”

You pepper his face with kisses before shooing him away.

You’re just applying the finishing touches to your make-up when you hear Joel coming up the stairs.

“Angel, are you almost rea….?”

His words die on his parted lips as he takes you in, his eyes traveling hungrily from your head to your toes.

“Well?” you ask, smoothing your hands down your body.

The grind of his jaw says it all and your smile grows.

“Joel…?” you purr. “Couldn’t wait for me to come downstairs?”

He walks all the way into the room and shuts the door.

“I wanted to see what was takin’ so long…”

“Well I’m ready now,” you sing with a sweet smile. “Let’s go.”

He stops you with his body, his heat washing over you and his mouth dipping to your ear.

“You think I’m goin’ trick or treating and to some party with you lookin’ like this?”

“Like what?” you ask, your tone demure.

The air between you is charged and disappearing by the inch.

“Darlin’,” he murmurs, his breathe a whisper along the shell of your ear.

You look at him through your lashes, the light scruff of his beard brushing your cheek and making you sigh out his name.

“We’re going to be late and Sarah is waiting….”

You step back and hear his sound of disapproval deep in his throat. It makes you shiver.

His eyes are glued to you as you turn and open the door and when you meet his gaze again it’s filled with heat and filthy promises.

When you enter the kitchen Sarah whistles loudly and grins. “WOW!”

You give her a bright smile and start toward the door. “Time to trick or treat!”

Once Sarah has plenty of candy you usher her off to her friends house for the night. They are having a sleepover with scary movies and lots of sugar.

As soon as Sarah is safely delivered to her new destination Joel settles his hand at your lower back and starts to push you back toward the house.

“Did you forget we have to stop by the neighbors house for the adult party?” you giggle.

He stops walking and presses himself against your back. “Don’t you think I’ve suffered enough today angel?”

“No,” you state, turning to face him. “I don’t think you’ve suffered at all in fact.”

Joel opens his mouth to argue but you press your finger to his lips.

“I’ve seen you smile and I know you love how much everyone is gushing over your costume and it won’t kill you to hang out with some friends for a couple of hours.”

He kisses your finger and then grabs your wrist to pull your hand away.

“An hour,” he growls.

“Two,” you counter.

He stares at you daringly, leaning forward and covering the inches between you, his eyes falling to your lips.

“And it’ll be your fault when I drag you somewhere dark and get my fingers inside you.”

Your breathy sigh is followed by a lick of your lips, Joel’s eyes following the movement with a hungry stare.

You don’t respond, not trusting yourself when your brain and body are consumed by him, and instead take his hand and move in the direction of the party.

“All the beer is still warm so I got you wine.”

You hold the glass out for him then search for a seat. When you see there aren’t any left you situate yourself on his thigh and rest yourself along his shoulder.

He takes a sip of the wine, eyeing you over the rim.

“Any good?” you ask.

Without an answer he curls his hand around the back of your neck and drags you down for a kiss, giving you a taste.

“Mm,” you hum against his lips. “Yummy.”

You chat with some of your neighbors, snacking and sipping your drink.

“You’re pulling off the whole grumpy Gomez thing really well,” you tease when there’s a lull in conversation.

“Who said I’m grumpy?” Joel replies with a smirk.

You dance your fingers up his chest and then lightly scratch them over his beard.

“I want another kiss,” you whisper.

He happily obliges but when you press yourself closer, shifting in his lap, he groans out a curse and pulls away.

At your questioning look he sighs.

“Darlin’…unless you want to stay in this chair for the rest of the night you better stop kissing my like that and wiggling your ass.”

You move again, unintentionally, and the hardness between his legs pushes against you.

“Oh,” you squeak. “Ohhh….”

He tightens his grip, his fingers digging into your skin in warning.

“Behave.”

“I’ll be good,” you promise with a slow blink.

“That’ll be a first,” he mutters.

You kiss him again, giggling when he starts to squirm beneath you.

“Oops.”

“I’d smack your ass right here and now if it weren’t for the creepy neighbor.”

“Creepy…?” you repeat and look around.

You lock eyes with your neighbor from across the street. He’s starting, his eyes blatantly roaming over your curves.

“I’m gonna knock his teeth out,” Joel threatens with a low rumble.

“He’s definitely drunk Joel. Not worth it.”

“He’s starin’ at what’s mine.”

You take Joel’s chin between your fingers, dragging his murderous gaze away from the neighbor until he’s focused on you.  

“Come on, let’s go get some fresh air,” you whisper.

You rise from his lap and he takes your hand, keeping you close as you work your way around the crowd of people in the living room. When you reach the back door he holds it open for you and ushers you outside, walking you toward a darkened spot on the side of the house.   

He lets out a deep exhale before grabbing your waist.

“Finally,” he says, in a hushed, rumbling voice as he pulls your back against his chest.

His hand slides along your side, tracing the curve of your waist before he closes his fingers around your wrist and lifts your hand to his mouth, kissing softly along your knuckles.

“What a Gomez move,” you tease lightly even as you melt into his embrace.

His free hand brushes along your shoulder and his fingers dance along your neck until he tilts your chin back, exposing more of your skin. With teasingly soft kisses he works his way to the spot just under your ear and whispers, “lift your dress.”

“Joel,” you breathe out, your voice wavering when he nips on your earlobe.

“Angel, I’ve waited long enough, don’t you think?”

His hands wander along your skin, kneading and squeezing as he goes. When he finds your ass cheek he grips it hard. You don’t answer, arching against him, and when he gives you a sharp smack you cry out.

“Is this my punishment?” you ask as you catch your breath.

He smacks you again, soothing the sting with soft caress.

“Lift your dress,” he repeats, his voice low and deep.

Your fingers reach down for the hem and you slowly lift the front, whimpering when his hand leaves your ass and slides across your stomach and between your legs.

“Someone might see,” you gasp even as you spread your legs for him.

“Fuck darlin’,” he groans when he feels the wet patch on your panties.

His finger brushes over the damp fabric and he wraps his other arm around your shoulders to keep you pressed to his chest, his touch torturously light.

When he pushes your panties to the side and slides his fingers through your arousal he lets out hum of satisfaction.

“You’re so beautiful,” he murmurs.

His finger slips inside you easily, pumping slowly in and out as he continues his kisses along your neck.

“You feel beautiful, too.”

He slides a second finger into you and growls, the sound vibrating right through you.

“Joel please…please,” you beg as your legs start to shake.

His grip tightens and he pushes his fingers deeper, pressing on your clit with his thumb. You wiggle and writhe against him, chasing your release as it builds.

“Joel,” you hiss through gritted teeth, trying your best to remain quiet.

He curls his fingers just right and continues circling your clit, the tightening of your walls giving him enough warning to slide his hand over your mouth and muffle your cries as you buck against him.

You slowly come down and sag into his strong hold.

He draws out your pleasure, pumping his fingers with deliberation and whispering praises in your ear.

“That’s my good girl,” he coos. “Letting me to fuck you with my fingers even when someone might see.”

He still has his hand clamped over your mouth, softening your continued moans.

“I’m taking you home,” he states, leaving no room for argument. 

He slowly removes his fingers and releases his hold on you. You turn in his arms and watch as he slips his soaked fingers between his lips and licks them clean.

“First I’m goin’ to get a better taste and then I’m goin’ to fuck you good and hard.”

You let out a whimper of want and drag your hand down his chest, palming the hardness between his legs.

He stops you with a firm hold on your wrist and your lips part to argue but he interrupts, dipping his head and brushing his mouth across yours when he whispers, “no, not here angel. I don’t want to miss a single sound that falls past these pretty lips when I’m buried deep inside you.” 

@hiddles-rose @lorilane33 @littleseasiren @lizette50 @blackwidownat2814

[scoonsalicious]

Unwanted: Chapter 2, Unwanted - Pt. 5

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Fem!Reader

Summary: When your FWB relationship with your best friend Bucky Barnes turns into something more, you couldn’t be happier. That is, however, until a new Avenger sets her sights on your super soldier and he inadvertently breaks your heart. You take on a mission you might not be prepared for to put some distance between the two of you and open yourself up to past traumas. Too bad the only one who can help you heal is the one person you can no longer trust.

Warnings: (For this part only; see Story Masterlist for general Warnings) Language,

Word Count: 1.8k

Previously On...: While on a mission with Steve, you two finally begin the process of healing and clearing the air between you.

A/N: This closes out Chapter 2! I have to say, I cannot wait to post Chapter 3; it's my personal favorite, and you'll see why soon enough! I hope you're all enjoying the story so far, and I'm so grateful for all the likes, comments, and reblogs-- you don't know how much they mean to me! You guys are the greatest! <3

Banner By: The absolutely amazing @mrsbuckybarnes1917

Taglist: (Please let me know if you’d like to be added!)  @blackhawkfanatic @les-sel @marcswife21 @buckybarnessimpp

When the Quinjet landed back at the Avengers’ Tower, Bucky was waiting for you in the landing bay. You'd only been gone for four days, but as soon as he saw you start down the gangplank, he ran to you, picking you up and spinning you in circles until you squealed.

"Buck! Put me down before I throw up on you!"

"Can't, Pocket," he said, though he did stop spinning you. "Missed you too much. Physically impossible to let you go."

Steve followed shortly behind you, rolling his eyes at his best friend's theatrics. "No love for your old war buddy, Barnes?"

Bucky laughed, finally putting you down to give Steve a brief, one-armed hug. "Glad you're back safe, too, Stevie," he said. "And thanks for bringing my Pocket home in one piece."

Steve pulled you close in a side hug, the earlier tension that had existed between the two of you having faded since you had a chance to clear the air. "You should be thanking her for bringing me home in one piece. The girl's deadly with plastic explosives."

You shoved him away from you playfully. "Please, Stevie," you teased. "If you just learned the first thing about computers, you could have done the whole mission on your own, you wouldn't even have needed me."

"Always gonna need you, Pocket," Steve said, ruffling your hair. "You're family." You gave each other stupid grins before he hefted his go-bag over his shoulder. "I'm gonna go grab a shower and get some sleep. I'll see you kids later." He walked off into the belly of the tower, leaving you and Bucky alone.

"Ugh, I can't wait to get out of this tac-suit," you moaned. "I always feel so filthy after a mission with explosives, you know?" Bucky gave you a curious look as he leaned down and grabbed your go-bag for you. "Such a gentleman," you smiled at him as you led the way back to your room.

You went straight into the bathroom and unzipped the top of your tac-suit, pulling it down over your arms until it was hanging from your waist. With a sigh of relief at being freed from the confines of the heavy poly-carbonate blended fabric, you washed your face and started brushing your teeth.

"So, how was the mission?" Bucky called from where he was sitting on your bed.

"Goo!" you managed to get out around a mouthful of toothpaste.

"Good, good." He paused. "So, um, it's not really my business or anything, but did something happen... between you and Steve? While you guys were gone? Like, did you guys, I dunno... sleep together?"

You nearly choked on your toothpaste and quickly spat it out in the sink before coming out of the bathroom.

"I'm sorry," you said, pointing your toothbrush at him accusingly. "Did you just ask me if I had sex with Steve Rogers?"

He wouldn't look at you. "Like I said, it's none of my business. It's just that, before you guys left, you were always kind of, I dunno, angry at him? And then you get off the plane and you're hugging and he's got his hands in your hair and you’re calling him ‘Stevie’. So, I was just wondering if something happened."

"And your brain immediately jumped to us sleeping together?" You asked him, incredulous. He looked up at you. "Seriously? We just talked. Lanced some bad blood that had been festering between us since Berlin, so we can work on being good again, be a family again." You noticed he was staring at you, mouth slightly opened. "What?" you asked him.

He motioned vaguely toward your chest, and you looked down to realize your tac-suit was still hanging half off of you and you were standing in front of him in just a purple push-up bra.

"Oh for fucks' sake, Barnes. They're just tits." You stalked over to your dresser and pulled out a t-shirt and slipped it over your head. "Better now?"

He shook his head as if a spell had been broken over him. "Uh, yeah. So, you didn't sleep with Steve," he reiterated.

"No, I did not. To begin with, he's family. There's a major ick factor. And second--, no. That's really it. The idea is super gross."

"Good," Bucky chuckled. "I love Steve like a brother, but I didn't love the idea of sharing you with him."

You started shimmying yourself out of the pants of your tac-suit and tossed it into your hamper. "Yes," you deadpanned, "because you know how much I love being compared to an object that can be owned and thus shared among friends. Not emotionally triggering for me at all."

Bucky had the decency to look chastised. "You know that's not what I meant."

"Relax, Barnes," you teased as you stepped into and pulled up a pair of shorts. "I'm just giving you shit." You ruffled his hair. "I may be emotionally scarred and have more baggage than the cargo hold on an airplane, but at least I can laugh about it."

Bucky rolled his eyes at you, but there was a smile on his lips. "You're something else, you know that?"

You grinned at him. "I'd like to think so. Makes your life so much more interesting, don't you think?"

Bucky nodded in agreement. "Definitely. You're never boring, that's for sure."

You chuckled and flopped down on your bed next to him. "So, what about you? Any juicy drama while I was gone?"

"Hmmm, let's see..." Bucky thought for a moment. "I'm pretty sure Nat and Banner were fucking in the lab the other day."

"No!" you gasped, sitting up.

"Yeah; I needed some calibration done on my arm, and since you weren't here, I went down to Bruce's lab to ask him to help, but the doors were locked. I was about to turn around and come back later, when the door opened up and Nat came rushing out, won’t acknowledge me or make eye contact, and I swear her shirt was on inside out. I get inside and Banner's actively tucking his shirt back into his pants."

You cackled at the mental image, kicking your legs in the air with delight. "Oh, that's amazing. Finally, those two crazy kids got together. I'll have to find some way to get Nat to give me all the dirty, dirty details."

"Ugh, if you do, please keep them to yourself," Bucky moaned. "Last thing I need is a mental picture of Banner's mini-Hulk."

"Hey now, I'm sure Bruce is perfectly proportionate," you teased. Then you got serious. "I gotta admit, I'm a bit jealous."

"You have a thing for Bruce?" Bucky asked, eyes wide with astonishment. "I would never have guessed he's your type."

"What?! No!" You playfully shoved him. "Same reason I'm jealous of Tony and Pepper, Wanda and Viz, Clint and Laura. You and your left hand, Sam and whoever he's dating this week. It just must be nice to be in a relationship, you know? To have someone to share that part of your life with."

Bucky cocked his eyebrow, but nodded, understanding your meaning and letting your joke about his left hand slide. "So, what's stopping you from going out and getting one for yourself, Pocket? You're smart, funny, gorgeous. You could date anyone you wanted."

You leaned back, making yourself comfortable against your pillows and heaved a heavy sigh. "Oh, you know, just the usual: Trauma, trust issues, fear of abandonment. All of that fun stuff." Bucky gave you a look, and you knew he wanted you to take the conversation seriously, for once.

"Finnne," you whined. "After I... Once I started out on my own, I was... Well, I did everything I could think of to try to reclaim sex for myself, you know? It wasn't healthy, it wasn't smart, but I was young and stupid and I didn't know what else to do. I can fuck someone without having a panic attack now, which, trust me, is a vast improvement from where I started, but making myself vulnerable for that emotional connection? To transcend something from just sex to a real relationship? I have no idea how to do that. It's like, I can open up one way, or the other; I can't do both. It's too much. If there’s even a hint of an emotional connection with a guy, I shut down. Close myself off. Like, it’s not worth the risk of getting hurt.”

"I understand," said Bucky, softly and simply, and you knew that he did. Your traumas were different, but the scars they had left on you were so similar. "I haven't been with a girl, physically, since 1944," he confided. "I don't know if I can trust anyone to be that open with, to share that part of me with. Not after everything that's been done to me. And I worry that I can't trust myself to let go, not without hurting someone."

You let out a long, low whistle. "That's gotta be some kinda celibacy record." You clapped your hand over your mouth. "You're a reborn virgin, James Buchanan Barnes!"

"Reached your quota for serious conversation, have you?" Bucky asked with a piqued eyebrow.

"You know it's not my strong suit," you conceded. "But seriously, man? 1944? Oof. Your balls must be black by now."

He gave you a look of disappointment, causing you to sigh.

"I know, I know," you said eventually. "You're trying to have a meaningful discussion with me and I'm being an immature ass, again. I'm sorry."

Bucky wrapped his arms around you and rested his chin on your shoulder. "You're not an ass, Pocket. You're just... I wish you could talk to me without feeling like you have to fall back onto your defense mechanisms, that's all. I want you to feel safe with me."

You turned your head to look at him. "Buck, I feel safer with you than anyone else on this entire fucking planet. You're my best friend and you know all of my deep, dark secrets. You know me better than anyone, but I’ve spent a lifetime building those defenses; they aren't all just going to fall down in a day, so that means an inappropriate joke or two is going to slip through every now and then.”

Bucky smiled at you and squeezed you a bit tighter. "I know, Pocket. And I adore you for it. But if you ever want to talk about anything serious, know that I'm here for you."

"I know," you said, leaning into him. "And thank you, for being so patient and understanding with me. I get that I can be... a lot."

"No, you're just enough," he said. "Never think otherwise."

<- Previous Part / Next Chapter ->

[konigsblog]

humilation

sub!alejandro x f!reader

...

warnings: cock and ball torture, degrading, self degrading, humilation, spanking, use of ���dog’, blowjob.

kinktober masterlist. (day 12)

a/n: this was supposed to be posted yesterday, but i took a break. here it is, posted the next day! ps. these photos were mainly the theme for this :)

His hard cock throbbed beneath your ruby high heel. Alejandro's pleading eyes gazed up at you, pleading for your mercy as you grinded the high heel back and forth, stepping on his stuffed dick. “Dirty boy, Alejandro. Look how hard you are, so desperate, hm?”

Alejandro nodded at your words. His breathing was heavy, hitching in his throat when you applied more pressure onto stepping on his dick. “Oh, stop whining...” you roll your eyes and shunned him for being so needy. “Undo your belt, and give it to me.”

He follows your orders, like an obedient and eager dog. He nervously fiddles with it before handing it to you. You drag it up your thigh slowly, teasing him with your seductive smile. “Up, dog.” He stands to his feet, his cock drooling all over his military issued jeans, cum stains around the crotch. His tip was an angry red.

“Undress. Hurry, Ale...” You stand behind him, spanking his bare ass and wrapping his leather belt around his wrists, tightening it. Pushing him up against the wall and leaning against him, your sweet and expensive perfume finds its way into his nostrils, seducting him. He can't seem to keep his eyes off you; pretty black and red lingerie, those dark red, crimson high heels and pretty jewellery he'd bought for you, ‘La luz de su vida’, as he said.

Your gloved hands wrap around his hard cock, and you begin stroking him. He's so sensitive, especially his tip; after being edged, having his cock stood on, and slapped about. Your other hand fondles his balls, squeezing it harshly to hear him groan and gasp, begging for your mercy. “Please, my–” “Hush..”

You stroke him faster at the sounds of his whimpers, twitching in your hand. Just as he feels himself getting close, you pull away. His eyes narrow down onto you, panting and heavily breathing as he looks down at you. “What?” he gasps, “Shh...” you ease down onto your knees, “Finish in my mouth, Alejandro. You're such a filthy boy anyways, I can see you desperate to cum on these tits too, do you want that, greedy dog?”

Shamefully, Alejandro nods. He closes his eyes, feeling you slap his cock, his eyes shooting open. “Don't look away from my eyes.” you look into his eyes and wrap your soft lips around him, your red lipstick staining his cock, lipstick marks stained on his lower abdomen and neck. “Oh, God, please..” he throbs in your mouth when you drag your tongue along his veiny shaft.

“Aren't you so fucking greedy? Say it, tell me how greedy and selfish you are, what a dog you are.” you laugh, sucking down onto his veiny cock while you suck him off. Alejandro's words come out stuttered as his orgasm comes close. “I'm so greedy, and so fuckin' s-sel-selfish... and a dirty dog!” you suck him off faster hearing those words, his tip spurting out thick cum, exploding in your mouth. You swallow every drop, his low whimpers and how he bucks into your mouth.

“God-God, I'm sorry, baby– Oh,– fuck!” he pants out, strings of his load landing on your exposed, bare tits. Left a panting, whining mess and breathless as you kiss his tip, his shaft red with your lipstick.

[theladyfirelord]

hiii little miss genius 🤭🤭!! could i request a drabble of selwyn having sleepover with his black s/o :)? thank you so much and have a fabulous day

Anything for you!! I really hope you enjoy it!! (:

Sleepover- Sel x Black S/O

You and Selwyn have been dating for a little over a year now. Sometimes you can't even believe it.

The Selwyn Emrys Kane was your boyfriend. How did you ever land such a magnificent being?

In his eyes, it's the other way around.

The two of you are always in awe of each other.

~~~

Today is Sel's birthday, and you've spent most of the day hanging out with Alice and William, with a couple of the other Legendborn tagging along for the festivities.

Selwyn's enjoyed himself...for the most part.

Don't get him wrong- he loves his friends to pieces, but there was one person that he wanted to be with the most...

You.

However, he would never admit that out loud.

But, with you, he never has to because you understand him better than he understands himself.

So you leave the party a bit early, saying that you had some "business" to take care of. Of course, Selwyn side-eyed that because it was a silly excuse, but you gave him no further explanation, which was extremely hard, considering he seemed a tad bit dejected after you announced that you were leaving.

But you had to in order to prepare your room for the sleepover surprise.

That's right-an exclusive night with just you and him.

After rearranging your room to include a large sized tent, with fairy lights and snacks located inside, you called Sel and told him to come over.

Little does he know that he'll be greeted with a night with the person whom he cherishes the most.

~~~

"SURPRISE, HONEY!" You shout as you open the door, greeting Sel with your cute, pink strawberry pattern pj's and a same colored bonnet to match. "We're having a sleepover! Just you and me!"

At first, Selwyn looks shocked, but then that shock turns into joy and amusement. "Don't you look precious, sweetheart?" He teases.

You run over to Selwyn, jumping into his arms. He catches you with ease, and in return, you wrap your legs around his waist, or really, his midsection (the boy was tall).

Once you unhook your legs from around Sel and place your feet on the ground again, you motion around to your newly transformed bedroom, practically beaming with excitement. "Are you ready for the best sleepover party of your life, Sel?"

A fast-growing smile spreads across the young Merlin's face, "Bring it on, babe."

~~~

And bring it on you did.

Together, the two of you ate snacks whilst watching countless amounts of rom-coms, action-packed movies, and, reluctantly, horror films.

Sel found every single scary movie you watched to be more humorous than terrifying...you on the other hand were petrified.

On second thought, maybe Sel found you more hilarious than the movies themselves.

After, you ordered pizza and babbled about new books that you've read to your boyfriend. This was a common occurrence for you two. You were more of the talker, and he was more of the listener.

Today, however, considering the fact that it was his birthday, he probably wouldn't want to hear you talk, right?

Immediately when this thought crosses your mind, you quiet down and look away in shame.

"I'm sorry, Sel, it's your birthday, I shouldn't be blabbering so much. You probably don't want to hear that and-" your ranting is cut off with a kiss from your boyfriend.

"I love everything that comes from your mouth. Please, keep going." He encourages, and just like that, your chattiness continues.

~~~

"Happy birthday, dear Selwyn, Happy birthday to you!" You attempt to sing to the birthday boy whilst holding a birthday cake with candles labeled "Happy Birthday, my love!"

Granted, your voice wasn't very good because let's face it, you were no Ariana Grande.

Sel appreciated the gesture all the same, seeing as he hadn't stopped smiling ever since you started singing.

"Okay, now blow out the candles, and make a wish!" You say as you hold the cake in front of him. But he doesn't move.

You were about to open your mouth to say something when he asks, "What if my wish already came true?"

...oh, how you loved him.

~~~

The night ends with the two of you crawling into your makeshift tent, side by side, face to face.

You begin to say, "I hope you had a good day today, Sel. I know it wasn't much-" When he interrupts, grabbing your hand and interlocking your fingers. "It was everything, Y/N. I got to spend time with the love of my existence. That's the best gift I could've ever been given."

~~~

[post-punk-revival]

How did you discover your kintypes?

Good question!

Short answer: I didn't, you can't, (math analogy)

Long answer:

I don't believe one can ever actually "discover" their kintypes, because that's one of those concepts that you can have puzzled out down to the most minute detail and still not be able to touch the pure truth. It's too subjective. It's like science. The most you can do is go with the closest theory you have, and that's what you tell people, and if there are no glitsches then it's as close to right as you can come, but the relationship I have with the certainty of my kintypes is asymptotic.

I know what you're asking though is how I landed on the ones I've named, but idk, it's kind of different between them, and they all have to come with the background understanding that they might just straight up change. I'm an osprey from dedicated and extensive research, comparing behavioral and anatomical data points, and deciding on the most exact conclusion that also makes me comfortable. I'm an alien because over several years I slowly and gradually had the creeping realization that I wouldn't have ever been anything else still knowing I'm alterhuman, but I'm a novakid specifically because I found them on a fan wiki for homebrew D&D races and was up until 6 am frantically having (literal) lights go off in my head and then less than a few hours after I first heard of Starbound, I was one. I know the robot bug and audiophage kintypes because I've had those feelings for so long with no good analogue in media or folklore that I decided to just say fuck it and make it myself so I can at least have an image, but I could always stumble upon something that proves me wrong! I'm a specific big fish beast because none of the other specific big fish beasts were adding up and this one does, but I'm open-minded to ones that might fit more.

Although Leviathan, and a lot of my other kintypes, are kind of nebulous by definition; AI, audiophage, my Cambrian mollusc thing and vaguely-objectkin thing I have going on, I've realized just can't be things I point at and go "Look it's me, Pandion haliaetus carolinensis" like my theriotypes. I spent a while trying to decide on WHAT kind of computer I was specifically, but there just isn't one. I will see myself equally as a 1950s vacuum tube IBM and a modern chat algorithm. Then on a different day I'll relate a lot to sentient spaceship AIs. Leviathan is something that, unlike the things I questioned before landing on it like mosasaur and kaiju and [insert every species of fish ever], is both physically and conceptually inconsistent depending on the depiction. I can point to both a traditional illustration of a giant apocalyptic fish that fights G-d and also a modern illustration of a wild-animalistic sea dragon with tentacles and say "me!" So at that point I can also point to shifts of both gills and fins and also many clawed talons and a reptilian tail and say "Leviathan!"

A lot of them are just like... kind of acceptances, and I can't pinpoint when or where it was that I was like "So I've been writing [something] from the POV of this species or roleplaying as or using it as an avatar and reblogging posts about them jokingly going 'haha me' and pointing them out as something I have attachment to for utterly no reason than my association with them and even just straight up referring to myself as 'basically one' sometimes, so eventually I gotta say I guess I am sort of a [raven/fish/centipede/cephalopod/drain fly therian] and just don't even really need to talk about it." It just feels like whatever. Not an epiphany. Just ascribing a label to something that was already there, regardless if it was always there or not.

But like... to bring it back around to the original thesis statement... there's nothing to discover, or unearth like a core. At least not for me, and at least not anything that actually can have that done to it. There's not really a mathematical equation that'll show me the one true self. The closest I can get is f(x) = 1/x and call it a day, and if you don't look too closely, after a while it will start to look like a straight line.

[alcoholttm]

PINNED POST

&& alcoholttm. inde. sel. priv. multi-muse rp blog with muses from media such as ONE PIECE, BLEACH, GHOST STORIES, MY HERO ACADEMIA , HAIKYUU, FIRE FORCE && MORE

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TIP YOUR LOCAL BARTENDER

RULE ONE. first off. i go by alcohol here, i have been for a while now and it’s just stuck over the year or two using it. i’m 33 years old, my pronouns are she/her and i live in the CMT timezone. i have a fulltime job and i never have a set schedule so i might not be on as much as i’d want to so please be patient with me! this blog is for fun so if you start pestering me about a reply it’ll get less and less fun and more about timelines and it’ll stress me out. any and all hate will be deleted and blocked as well. i suffer from depression and anxiety so this place is the one place i can enjoy and escape the world and i don’t want that ruined.

RULE TWO. this blog is independent(not affiliated with any group) selective(will be picky on who i follow/follow back), private (i only rp with people who are mutuals with me). so please be aware of that when following me. at this time the only exclusive person i have is shiba's paulie(shipwrght) to my kaku. we've just fleshed out our characters so much that i don't want to rp kaku with any other paulie's, i want to say thank you for understanding!

RULE THREE. there will be no god modding on this blog. that means what my character does is controlled by me and me alone, unless you ask me about a fight sequence where my character gets hurt, don’t make it so your character hits mine, instead go something like “they aim to hit–” that way i can decide if the hit actually makes contact or not, making it more fun to rp with you!

RULE FOUR. this is a multi muse blog, so there will be different muses for different fandoms. if you have any problem with any fandom i have, then i will tag it accordingly. but you need to let me know because i won’t tag most of my rps besides “ic post” and the url of the person i’m rping with.

RULE FIVE. everything that might be trigger inducing will be tagged as “___ warning” and if you want something else tagged just let me know and i’ll tag it for you!

RULE SIX.  this blog is not safe for personal blogs to follow. unless your personal blog has an rp blog attached to it i will block you, so be sure to let me know that you have an rp blog if that’s the case!

RULE SEVEN. i do rp with OCs and i really enjoy it! however i will need a bit of an about to go by so i know how my character will react to yours or how to even go about making you starters!

RULE EIGHT.  the only thing that i wish to be triggered is bdsm/rape/noncon/torture as well as visuals on needles and if you could tag those as “hdl” that would be fantastic!

Thank you so much for reading! I hope you have a wonderful day! Hope to rp with you soon!

MUSES

MY HERO ACADEMIA

rody soul || PRIMARY

tokoyami fumikage || PRIMARY

BLEACH

kon || PRIMARY

keigo asano || PRIMARY

FIRE FORCE

shinra kusakabe || PRIMARY

HAIKYUU

hinata shoyo || PRIMARY

GHOST STORIES

amanojaku || PRIMARY

ONE PIECE

monkey d. luffy || PRIMARY

usopp || PRIMARY

kaku || PRIMARY

POKEMON

latias || PRIMARY

YUGIOH

honda hitoro || PRIMARY

FULL METAL ALCHEMIST

alfons heiderich || PRIMARY

brandy || PRIMARY

winry rockbell || TESTING

LAND BEFORE TIME

littlefoot || PRIMARY

TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES (2012)

donnie || PRIMARY

mikey || SECONDARY

HELLUVA BOSS

moxxie || SECONDARY

GARGOYLES

lexington || SECONDARY

NON-AFFILIATED OCS

sol || PRIMARY

[lacklustres]

#LACKLUSTRES. i haunt these lands, though my heart still beats.

ind. sel. mutuals and 20+ only. carrd in pinned. like ( ♥ ) or reblog ( ↺ ) this post and i'll check you out! minors, personals, and pkmn IRL blogs do not interact.

[selvepnea]

dynamo my beloved T-T

[fangoffenrir]

★ + Sel :3

Send me ★ + a name of another muse / character in my muse's canon and they'll talk about their relationship with them

"Selina (did we land on Valerian?) Skye is easy to love... In equal measure, the homicidal urges, drive to chaos, inclination towards substance abuse, and all the naiveté of a former street cat shutting itself in a microwave make her quite easy to worry about."

"She inherited my wanderlust, reckless ambition, and big emotions. Teaching the monster-hunting and mage stuff is sort of on drip-feed to leave space for her to travel and experiment, find her own rhythm, if she needs to cut and run early. It's nice that she takes to the kitchen and outdoorsy lessons so well, that's something to bond over and manage our worst inclinations together."

"Sel also looks just like Amelie did at her apparent age, albeit with longer hair, which is to say she's a very cute daughter. I'd like to braid it someday, like I used to for Elizabeth-Jane. I consider it a point of pride that she's carrying the family name."

[creatureprofessor]

the latest smear campaign by our govt includes opposing politicians' heads badly edited onto the bodies of waiters, who are then edited to hold plates w slogans like "WAR" and "MIGRATION" and funniest of all, the mayor of Budapest holds the "GENDER" sign.

"The Humble Servants of Bru$sels", it says and Ursula von der Leyen is there. landed in my mailbox today, and granted i will use Dzsender Karigeri for collage purposes.

[ivory-lamps]

B21: Beyond Twilight

Characters: Yodaka, Nagi & Netaro Location: HAMA Summary: Hakkei reaches Flower Laundry and Nagi tells him to choose a seedling. He is bewildered to see how Nagi deals with accidents. Proofreader: Shay

ㅤ

Hakkei: (I’ve checked the map several times now, but that really is a store that sells flowers, isn’t it? There is quite a crowd and they seem quite busy…)

(How can people “deepen their bond with themselves” at a place like this?)

Sonia: A tourist? Please, come this way.

*Hakkei walks inside*

Sonia: Nagi-san, another tourist has arrived!

Nagi: Welcome… …Ah.

Hakkei: (! The huge vase right next to him is about to fall…!?)

Nagi: ……

Hakkei: (He stopped it with an acrobatic pose…!)

Are you alright!?

Nagi: I apologise for startling you. This sort of thing happens quite often. I’ll place the vase back where it belongs… there we go.

Hakkei: It happens often…?

I’m going to be straightforward, but can I really deepen my own bond with myself here?

Nagi: Yes.

Hakkei: (A sincere gaze and unwavering response… I see, so he’s confident.)

Nagi: I’ve prepared some seedlings and saplings over here. Please pick one you like.

Hakkei: Oh?

Nagi: You can take your time or pick one based on your intuition. Either is fine.

Hakkei: You don’t have any photos of what the seedling or sapling will grow into? I can’t tell what colour the flower will be or even if it’s going to grow into a flower or a tree.

Nagi: Exactly. It’s that way on purpose.

Hakkei: (I see… So you can become more attached to it this way.)

Then, I choose this one.

Nagi: Next, please turn on the app and tap on the plant icon. Come closer to the seedling with your phone in your hand…

*A strange ringing can be heard*

Hakkei: Wha…!? W–What was that sound?

Nagi: It’s the seedling’s voice. You can talk to it through the app.

Hakkei: Wha…!? That’s ridiculous!

Nagi: Feel free to use this app during your next visit to HAMA.

Even when you’re separated from this seedling, you can talk to it through the app and see how it’s growing alongside you.

When you’re working hard, this little seedling will also be doing their best.

Hakkei: ……

Nagi: The seedling will be planted in an area of the park where our concert will be held. You can choose where to plant it on the app, so please pick a spot you’d like and then you can actually go and plant it.

Also, you can set a phrase from the language of flowers to send to your future sel–!

Sonia: Nagi-san, watch out!

Hakkei: (Another huge vase is about to fall on top of him…!)

Nagi: ……

Hakkei: (He stopped it just in time… with another strange pose…!)

Nagi: The app will take you to the park. There will be special lighting there that will help you plant the seedling at night. I’ll also provide assistance through the app.

Hakkei: …Thanks. Be careful of future falling vases. I’ll take my leave, then.

(By planting a seedling you selected yourself, this land becomes something special. It’s as if you’re visiting a part of yourself. It’ll definitely make you want to check and see how the seedling is doing.)

*Hakkei leaves*

Hakkei: (Phew… it’s been a while since I last did some gardening, so I’ve gotten hungry now. The venue for dinner is Cafe369 in Ward 18, eh?)

(Judging by its exterior, it looks like it’s aimed towards young people. I wonder what sort of hospitality they’ll provide here.)

*Hakkei walks inside*

Laika: Da! Me-me-me… meatbun!

Netaro: Welcome! You’d like to order a drink, right?

Hakkei: (Ugh… this is an assault of colours! What is with that employee? Is he wearing roller skates…?)

(He’s moving like some sort of sea creature in the middle of the ocean. He’s skating about as he pleases while delivering food…)

Netaro: Alrighty, what colour are you feeling today? Are you in a good mood? A bad mood? A super duper good mood~?

I can make your own customised meatbun in just 3 minutes! In other words, it’s your “meatbun fantasia”!

Hakkei: (A customised meatbun…!?)

Tourist A: Wow… Is this a fruit bun? It’s delicious!

Tourist B: …It’s so good. I’m really glad I stopped by.

Tourist C: Phew! This “bun” goes great with beer. I can feel my mouth tingling from the black pepper!

Hakkei: (There are so many people here on their own and they’re all young people. As I’d thought, middle-aged people wouldn’t enjoy this sort of place…)

Laika: Enemy ship~

Hakkei: W–What’s with this pet robot!? Don’t perch on my shoulder!

Laika: Enemy ship found~ Male Cro-Magnon, tourist. Overrr.

Netaro: Mm, a message from Laika… Hmm, male, aged 55. A spy tourist…!

Hakkei: W–What the…? I haven’t decided on my order yet.

Netaro: No matter. Either way, I’ve already made up my mind to provide all tourists with a thorough service!

Come, Laika. We’re gonna provide this tourist with the best hospitality ever~!

Laika: Third eye – awaken!

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ🚩 Omotenashi Battle 🚩

Netaro: Thanks for waiting~ The “Spy Mission Doomed to Oblivion☆Full Course: Sweet and Sour Meatbuns” will be perfect for the male Cro-Magnon, aged 55!

Hakkei: (This… is a ridiculous amount, and not to mention, it’s just meatbuns… I suppose I’ll try one of them…)

(...It’s delicious!)

(How strange. The flavours and textures are all different. It’s like I’m having different meals from one meatbun. There are also sweet ones as well, but they’re all so delicious…!)

(This place felt so uncomfortable to be in and yet, I’m in a trance because of the food. I don’t even have the brainpower to evaluate the food properly… I see now…!)

(Since the space is so chaotic, it means each individual won’t stand out like a sore thumb…!)

(Everyone must be enjoying their solo trip, which matches the concept of the tour. There are young people and middle-aged people as well, but they’re all here alone.)

(They’re not exchanging any glances with each other, but each and every one of them can taste the delicious flavour of the meatbuns that are out of this world. …How wonderful.)

Netaro: Are you satisfied?

Hakkei: Yes… “Meatbun Fantasia” is absolutely brilliant!

*Hakkei leaves*

Hakkei: Alright, it’s conventional to end the night with some alcohol. So this is the “Ten Nights’ Dream” bar in Ward 17… eh?

Yodaka: Welcome. Please, have a seat.

Hakkei: (Hm… that’s the owner? This space… this atmosphere… I felt a sense of calm wash over me the moment I stepped foot inside.)

I’m thirsty, so I suppose I’ll start with a martini.

Yodaka: Understood.

Here you are.

Hakkei: Thank you. …Ahh… it’s good.

It’s a lovely bar. Who selects the music here?

Yodaka: Him. He’s in charge of setting the atmosphere.

Chou un: It is my honour. Tonight, I decided to create a playlist on the theme of “travelling”.

Hakkei: How wonderful.

I’ve been walking around all day, so I’m exhausted. But I think I’ll be able to relax here.

Yodaka: From work?

Hakkei: More or less. …Oh, I’ve finished my drink.

Yodaka: Tonight, I’m making original cocktails for each tourist.

Hakkei: Oh? I’ll have one of those then.

Yodaka: Thank you for waiting. Here is your “Desert Oasis”.

Hakkei: How beautiful… let’s see…

(The mint and lime are refreshing,,, The gin is pleasant and it feels cool, like the sea.)

It feels as if water is seeping into my tired and parched body. This is exactly what I was wanting.

I visit bars quite often, but it’s not easy to find such a wonderful establishment.

Yodaka: Thank you.

A night you’ll find so lovely, you wouldn’t want it to be over…

That’s the sort of atmosphere I’d like to provide to our customers.

Hakkei: (I’d love to stay longer, but unfortunately, it’s time to leave…)

*Hakkei leaves*

Hakkei: (I always felt these tours were too focused on the “youthful” side, but now, I’ve found that it doesn’t bother me anymore.)

(No, it’s not over yet. I won’t acknowledge them until I finish watching their concert.)

Yun Yun: I’ve taken down the sign outside~

Yodaka: Oh, thank you.

Yun Yun: It’s almost time for the concert, huh~?

Yodaka: Yeah.

Yun Yun: …You’re going to quit HAMA Tours once the concert’s done, right?

Yodaka: ……

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ📍 Flashback

Netaro: Yoda, the phrase “all in my head” doesn’t exist in this galaxy. There’s definitely a reason for it.

Yodaka: …I know.

I know, but I don’t want to find out. I’m afraid I or the tranquillity I love will break apart if I do…

Momiji / Kaede: I might not be very impressive, but it’s my responsibility to oversee everyone. And we’re all comrades who live under the same roof.

If there’s something you’re worried about, then I’d like you to tell me – I want to be of help. Am I not good enough?

Nagi: By the way, Yodaka-san. Did you know these flowers also have another meaning apart from “modesty”?

Yodaka: ……

Nagi: Actually, I’m more familiar with the other meaning. It also means–

Yodaka: (–”Beginnings”.)

(I did know when I was looking into the language of flowers, but I unconsciously ran away and chose the other meaning.)

(It was as if Nagi tried to scoop that unconscious part of me up.)

Yun Yun: Yodaka-san? Oh, are you feigning ignorance…?

Yodaka: Yuda.

Yuda: …What?

Yodaka: I met you for the first time when you came in for an interview. That should be the truth.

*A beep can be heard*

Yuda: Why’d you say that all of a sudden?

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ📍 Flashback

Yun Yun: Well, I knew you had a taste for the subdued ever since you chose this store.

Yodaka: There’s something I want to ask you.

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[mk-writes-stuff]

Happy wbw! This might be a strange one, but how do you think your characters would do in the setting of Illaros?

Happy WBW! This isn’t a strange one at all, I’m actually pretty hyped :)

I’m going to primarily go with the Seven Station characters because I think they’ll be more entertaining but if I’m in the mood I might throw in some Pirates’ Roost characters at the end. Also I’m making my usual crossover assumptions - everyone can understand each other’s language (although they won’t know world-specific terms, like Belladonna has no clue wtf a halawemavar is) and magic powers work regardless of the setting. I’m also going to assume the Seven Station characters have gotten used to seeing grass :)

Honestly, I think Cassie’s going to do the best on Illaros. Her machine empathy is pretty much useless, but she doesn’t really need it honestly - she can still use it to make her arm function better. She’d probably join a local militia or become a bounty hunter and actually be pretty successful. I feel like if she ever met Izjik, they’d really get along.

Belladonna and Nellie are both struggling but I think they’d make it. Nellie would have a rough time without her meds, but she’d survive. She’s pretty resourceful and I feel like she’d be able to get a contract using her empathy magic. Belladonna’s mostly struggling because she’s never been unimportant before, but she’s clever and very good with rich people so I think she’d manage to swing it as a negotiator or something. I think Cassiopeia would be okay for the same reason, although she’d definitely be plotting to usurp whoever took her in and move up in society as much as she could.

Ricinus and Goldenrod would be okay if they landed in the city. They’re screwed otherwise - they’re both too proud to do “peasant work.” If they landed in a city, they’d probably pretend they were never married and start new lives avoiding each other as much as possible.

Sel would make it too. He’s naive and wouldn’t entirely understand what’s going on, but he’s clever and resourceful and very hardworking. He’d end up with a job in a restaurant or something and a small place to himself and live a quiet life. I think Rhys would end up doing something similar, although he’d have a harder time of it due to his disabilities.

Stellaris would be so excited but he would not do well. He’d be fascinated by everything around him but he honestly does not have a lot of skills for job prospects and is not good at endearing himself to others. I think he and Astra would get along if they met but outside of that he’d have a very rough time.

Narcissus would not survive. There would be bugs. He’d be broke. He’s allergic to pollen. I’m sorry but this man wouldn’t make it a week.

Also as a bonus - most of the Pirates’ Roost cast would do pretty fine on Illaros (it’s not too drastically different from Ixalan, they’d adapt), but I’m confident if the HO cast ever met Malcolm, it would go extremely poorly. Like I feel like they’d already be weirded out by this little feathery man (Malcolm’s like 5’7 and skinny) introducing himself as a siren but if they saw him praying quite passionately to the stars? I’m extremely confident it would be on sight.

Anyway, thank you for the ask! This was very fun, and I’d love to hear your thoughts on how you think they’d do :)

[theladyfirelord]

For lark and sel at the Merlin academy

Oooh! I'll do my best! I really hope you enjoy it! Thanks for requesting!

Scenario: A longtime rivalry between the two young boys at the Merlin Academy comes to an end with Selwyn Kane being named Nicholas Davis' Kingsmage.

Merlin Academy- Lark and Sel

Lark irritated Sel. Plain and simple. 

To be fair, most people irritated Sel, but Lark just really knew how to push his buttons. 

Maybe the animosity stemmed from the fact that they’ve been pinned against each other since the day Sel arrived at the academy.

~~~

Selwyn Kane was a prodigy. The best of his generation. Just like his mother, Natasia.

None of the other Merlins could even dream of matching his skill level…except Lark.

Larkin Douglas was the only Merlin who could hold his own against Selwyn. But even though this fact remained true, Sel still managed to beat him in every battle. 

No matter the challenge, Sel won. Not to be unexpected considering he was trained by one of the most powerful Merlins of the previous generation, Issac Sorensen.

Which is why today’s duel for a place at the side of the Order’s future king would be no different. Sel would be Nick Davis’ Kingsmage. 

~~~

“In this closing battle, Selwyn Kane and Larkin Douglas will compete to be named Kingsmage.” Gillian announces, while walking to the middle of the arena, where Lark stands in the right corner with Selwyn opposite him in the left corner.

Gillian continues, “Throughout this tournament, our two candidates have been observed based on their capabilities in mesmerization, casting, and aether manipulation.”

“Today, the top two ranked Merlins will duel it out in this arena to assess strength." Gillian looks intensely at the crowd before shifting her gaze to the table of the Regents, "Their individual performances in the other three categories alongside this one will be considered to determine the final result."

At that, Gillian looks to both Sel and Lark purposefully, "Without further ado, let the battle begin."

~~~

The fight was most definitely entertaining to watch. Mostly because of Sel.

Lark barely managed to land a hit on him throughout the entire battle. Each time he would lunge, Selwyn had already moved out of reach. He was agile and limber, something Lark had learned but not yet mastered.

Sel utilized aether with precision and intent. If he wanted to land a hit, then he did, with zero difficulty at that. Lark's defenses were useless against Selwyn.

Lark spent more time on the ground from Sel's attacks than he did actually fighting.

Lark was an excellent fighter. In training, he defeated nearly all of his opponents...that weren't Sel.

And one thing was evident in the fight- Selwyn had a mission that he intended to fulfill.

No one, not even Larkin Douglas, would stop him from satisfying what he set out to do.

~~~

It wasn't unsurprising when Sel won the tournament.

Not only did he excel in the other categories, but he completely annihilated Larkin in the final battle.

After quieting down the anxiously awaiting crowd, Martin Davis speaks, "After careful consideration, a decision has been made." He stops to hold up Selwyn's hand, "Selwyn Emrys Kane has been selected to be the Kingsmage of my son, Nicholas Martin Davis, Scion of King Arthur Pendragon, first-ranked. He will be oathed immediately following the end of this ceremony.”

Sel did it. The very role he worked himself strenuously to achieve was his. He felt...

"Ye complete and utter disappointment, Larkin! All this training and for what? Ye to end up in second place? Because of a Kane at that?" Calum Douglas shouts, clearly angered by his son's loss. He stomps over to Lark and practically drags him off stage.

Before he disappears completely from sight, Lark spares a glance at Selwyn, who was already staring intently at him.

For the first time since the two met, Sel felt empathy towards Lark.

The two were no longer rivals. One had won and the other had loss, but even still, they both were the two greatest Merlins of their respective generation.

Only Larkin's father didn't see it that way.