#seeing this was the light at the end of the tunnel that was an 8 hour shift

[kcdragons]

Getting the cortisone injection for my hip today. Wish me luck!

If it relieves the pain the way my doctor thinks it will we'll know what it is 100% and be able to move onto next steps (surgery probably)

If it works this will be the first day I'm without pain in 8 months

---------

If you wanna help me out with my medical bills you can donate here:

Ko-Fi

PayPal

Venmo

[raptorrobot]

psssttt… butcherbird would be a decent ship name

ANON . YOUR MIND

[wayfayrr]

I hope life eases up soon man, take care of yourself

Thanks mate <3

stuff's starting to gradually get better now, actually let myself feel feelings after bottling them till it popped

just kinda turns out that throwing yourself into something so you're numb to the other things can really burn you out :') So I'm trying to find motivation to write and answer asks again, I'm hoping it'll be soon but idk atp

[moth-tea-merchant]

i remember making the sword and seeing that and being like "oh...oh no... :""")"

So I'm just reading Legendary weapon descriptions (since I obviously don't own all of them and I love little lore bits), and this is the cutest thing ever. Aurene plz, you can still do this even as an Elder dragon, I don't mind!!! you'll always be my baby!!!!!!!!!

[livfastdieyoung69]

every year for some reason i get a motley crue phase and an eminem phase. rn i am deeper than i have ever been in the eminem phase and i don’t see any signs of leaving

[enwoso]

LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL — alexia putellas x teen!reader

twelve days of christmas | day 8

based on this request

the streets of barcelona were alive with christmas fun and cheer as fairy lights hung across building fronts, festive music spilled from cafes and children chased each other with big toothy grins.

but for you, none of it mattered. at 18 on paper you were living the dream. signing for barca in the summer should have been the best thing that had ever happened as your career into football continued to grow.

but instead it felt like everything, slowly was falling apart.

you sat alone in your small apartment which just happened to be in the same building as a lot of your other teammates, such as keira, ona, alexia.

your eye-line catching the unpacked boxes in the corner of your room. moving from england had been hard enough leaving everything you knew behind but the pressure of playing for one of the best teams in the world had you at point where you were starting to crumble.

every game felt like another failure. every missed chance or misplaced pass was catapulted by the media who had turned on your pretty quickly. having you at cloud nine as the 'best rising star' to a 'disappointing, overrated player'

you had told anyone but you mind was starting to eat away at you, your depression which you had fought so hard to overcome was slowly coming back and beginning to suffocate you.

you were beginning to avoid your teammates, declining their invitations to team nights out as well as rarely speaking with coaching staff when she desperately needed to.

so now, with christmas peeking around the corner the festive cheer only fuelled your loneliness.

training today had been no different, you'd kept your head down doing the drills like a robot as you barely acknowledged anyone to the point where you hadn't noticed the watchful eye alexia had over you. watching each move you made a worried look in her eyes.

as you were packing your bag up slipping it over your shoulder as you were about to make the short journey back to your apartment, you felt a hand on your shoulder.

"y/n" alexia called softly, "can we talk?"

you hesitated as you tried to carry on walking brushing the spaniard off but she was quick to hold you back, grabbing your wrist. "alexia, i'm fine. really" you said but it came out more as a beg for her to just let you go.

alexia stepped closer, her expression kind but firm as her brow furrowed the same worried look in her eyes from training had returned. "you've been quiet lately, i just want to make sure your okay. you not alone astro, we are here for you"

you froze, your brave front you'd been putting on threatening to crack at her soft words. you wanted to brush alexia off, carry on dealing with it as you were, tell her you were fine but the lump in your throat grew too large.

"i don't know if i can do this," you whispered, you voice trembling, "everyone hates me and i can't.. i can't be what they want me to be" you sobbed as alexia wrapped you into a tight, comforting hug.

alexia's eyes softened, pulling away from the hug as she placed a hand on your shoulder, "come with me" she whispered still loud enough for you hear as she gentle tugged on your arm for you to follow her.

reluctantly, you found yourself in alexia's car being driven through the streets of barcelona. stopping at a house which you didn't recognise, but it was nicely decorated with fairy lights and many christmas decorations.

"where are we?" you asked, you voice still raspy from crying earlier on.

"you'll see" alexia replied with a small smile as she lifted her hand to knock on the door, knocking a few times before the door opened.

"¡ah, alexia! hola y/n, hace tiempo que no te veo. entras, entra" alexia's mother greeted you both with a warm hug as you entered what you now realised was alexia's family home.

her younger sister alba hugging you as she came to see who was at the door teasing you about being too serious as the scent of freshly baked goods filled the air.

alexia leading you into the living room where a perfectly decorated christmas tree stood tall and proud as laughter echoed as alexia's cousins played games on the floor.

you stood slightly awkward, unsure of your place, "i don't belong here" you whispered quietly but alexia still caught what you said.

alexia turned to you, a frown appearing. "of course you do astro, you're part of this team and that makes you part of this family"

hearing alexia's kind words leave her mouth, a sense of comfort in them you had been searching for since you arrived in barcelona. you felt a weight on your chest lightly even if it was only slightly.

that evening you spent the time with alexia and her family, spending the time playing board games and sharing stories as everyone took a break alexia bumped your shoulder.

"you know, i know what's it like to struggle" alexia spoke softly and with such caution, "i felt the same pressure when i was young, like i wasn't enough. but astro you have to remind yourself why you started playing in the first place"

"you love the game, right?" alexia asked as you nodded, tears pooling in your eyes. "then it's okay to feel like this but you can't shut everyone out. we are here for you, the whole team is" you nodded as the floodgates opened. alexia wrapping you in a tight hug letting you cry.

-

over the next few weeks, things started to look up and you were finding you spark slowly. alexia's family had welcomed you and supported you with open arms. you'd

the club had organised for you to be able to go home for christmas meaning alexia was bringing your christmas gift early. alexia had spent the day helping you pack for your trip back to england, as you flew early tomorrow morning.

“astro, i have this for you-“ alexia smiled as she handed you a small gift box which was perfectly wrapped with a small silk bow on the top. you looked to alexia thanking her for it as you tore the neat wrapping off it.

inside was a simple silver beaded bracelet with the words, ‘hay luz al final del túnel’ engraved in to a small heart charm and which in english translated to — there's light at the end of the tunnel.

you looked up from the small bracelet, your throat feeling tight as you engulfed alexia in a hug, as you whispered your thanks to her — not just for the bracelet but for all the help she’s given you in the past few weeks.

alexia smiled, “your going to be okay, y/n. one step at a time”

[just-a-ghost00]

The way you make me feel ~

Images found on Pinterest. Deck used : golden thread tarot. Reading written from their POV.

Group 1

Hermit, Temperance, Queen of pentacles, The Magician, knight of pentacles, ace of pentacles

You make me feel safe. Cared for. Loved in ways I never thought were possible. Nurtured. Understood. Appreciated, not only because of my work or my wealth but solely for who I am as a person. You make me feel strong. Like the world is at the tip of my fingers and all I got to do is to reach further to make my wildest dreams come true. You make me feel strong. Determined. Wise. With you, everything seems so simple. So bright and warm. You make me feel like time has stopped and it's just the two of us. I feel like I am in a bubble. A cozy cocoon that was made just for me. I feel like I belong somewhere. Like finally, after so many trials and errors, I get to be rewarded. I feel so blessed to have you in my life. I still wonder how all of this is possible. You make me want to believe in magic again. I feel like I'm walking on a line, perfectly balanced and at peace with myself, reassured by the thought that whatever I decide to do, whichever way I decide to go, you'll be there to catch me if I fall. Like you'll always follow me and never leave my side. I feel so happy I could cry. You make me feel like everything is possible and nothing can stop me from my success. I feel invicible with you by my side. You make me want to believe in myself and move forward with my head held high, slowly but surely, at my own pace, on my own terms. With you I feel secure, confident in my ability to create a life I can be proud of, to embody a person that people can look up to with respect in their eyes. You make me feel grand, so much bigger than I am. You bring so much in my life that I don't know how I could ever thank you. In your presence, I feel like I am given a second chance at life. Like my time has come and I can be born again.

Group 2

10 of swords, 4 of wands, Temperance, 9 of pentacles, Hanged man, ace of wands

You make me feel puzzled. I don't know if I should be mad at you or adore you. You get on my nerves and yet you make me so proud. With you I feel like I can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel. I don't feel as lonely as I used to be. I feel like I can hope for a better future than what I've been handed so far. I feel like I can overcome my fears and face any obstacle coming my way. Like I am worthy of love and interest. I feel alive again. I feel hopeful about the future and inspired to move forward. My creativity has rocketed. I feel triggered. Like everything I thought I knew is complete BS and that honestly shakes me and upsets me in a way. I feel like I have to start all over again, like my work wasn't enough and as good as I thought it was. You make me feel like focusing on myself and taking care of my own goals isn't as bad as it sounds. That I too am capable of creating a reality I can be proud of. Like my unique perception of life and lonely nature can actually be an asset and a driving force. You give me the courage to face my demons and be a better person. You make me feel like I can tip the scales in my favor and change the course of action. Like life isn't as harsh and bad as I thought it was. Like I can be whole again and enjoy the pleasures this world has to offer. You make me feel bold and curious again. You make me want to celebrate and have fun, to shift my perspective and learn. You challenge me. And as much as that confuses me that also sets me free. I'm not sure why or how you do this but I thank you for the clarity you bring into my life.

Group 3

Empress, 8 of pentacles, 8 of cups, High Priestess, 9 of pentacles, 10 of swords

You make me feel whole. Worthy of love and attention. Beautiful. Valuable. You make me feel powerful and important. Like all the worries in the world are nothing for I am stronger than this. With you I feel like there will never be a day where I feel sad again. Like I can tackle anything and turn dust into gold. You make me feel fearless. With you, the dark and sorrow don't sound as scary as they once were. You make me feel like my despair is over. Like my prayers have finally been answered. But I also feel scared. Scared that my depth and darkness will have a repelling effect on you. I fear that the more I grow, the more chances I have of losing you. You make me feel attractive. You make me want to love myself more and work harder to be a version of myself I will adore. You make me feel human. For the first time in my life I feel like I don't have to apologize for who I am. You make me feel understood, seen and appreciated. With you I feel protected. I feel like sadness can no longer hold me down. You make me want to reach higher heights and set higher goals, to prove everyone how wrong they were of underestimating me. You make me want to fight. You make me feel like I can own the world. Like I can finally stand in my power and embrace the entirety of my being without shame nor fear. You make me feel brand new, like I am reborn, like I have everything to gain and nothing to lose. You make me want to go beyond my limits and transform my being, to heal my wounds and move on once and for all from my past. I can't find the words to describe how much this means to me.

[obbystars]

Encounter Nihilism

Synopsis: “Just because they don’t have any eyes doesn’t mean they don’t have other senses. Come on, you should know that by now.” Z-13 (Sebastian Solace)

Notes: Not exactly a Sebastian Solace x Reader fic but you can read it as such / read When Light Fades before reading this / Reader deaths, nothing too angsty though / Sebastian being an asshole (and we love him for it) / Experimental deaths + cutting off limbs / Brief angst at the end / may be a tad bit shorter than my usual (it bothers me)

Credits: dividers by @cafekitsune

(Is it obvious this is self indulgent? I really love When Light Fades, super proud of it. I haven’t decided if I’m gonna take this concept and use it for an OC yet, but oh boy, it’s getting strong. Anyway, this fic’s meant to explore more on the reader featured in When Light Fades while also continuing to experiment with Sebastian’s character.)

As you swam to the next door, you hear strange noises coming from the other side. It’s not the Good People, they can’t come into the flooded rooms. It doesn’t sound like an angler either. You continued forward and the next door slid open. Your eyes widened at the sight of the creature on the other side as it looked at you.

Panicked, you try to climb into a locker. You don’t make it in time as you feel its tentacles wrap around your head to crush your diving mask, but that isn’t what kills you. The creature manages to trick the operator behind the PDG by attempting to remove it, causing immediate detonation.

You woke up with a gasp in an all too familiar room.

“I heard that,” Sebastian leans on his hand as his lure flickers on, “What’d you run into this time… Ah,”

You looked down as he slides over the document. An image of the creature you encountered is shown and beside it was another photo that was redacted. Maybe in another death you’ll see what that other photo is.

Nihilism was the codename Urbanshade had given it. A lot of the text within the first page was left redacted, and only a few lines were on the second page were visible.

“If by chance any operative encounters Z-8 within any flooded rooms, it is advised to remain still and turn off any light source currently in possession. Wait for Z-8 to pass.”

That was the only line you were able to read. Sebastian begins to tap his finger against the desk. You sit back and he takes that as the signal you’re done, but it’s not like you read much anyway.

He sighs as he closes the document, “Think of if as Red Light, Green Light. Surely you’ve played that game before,”

“Ugh, this feels worse than Pandemonium…” you groaned, leaning on the table.

“Pretend you’re a corpse floating in the water. That should be pretty easy for you, yeah? I mean, you have died quite a lot,”

“Screw you…”

Upon your next life, you find yourself in the trench tunnels about 20 doors in. It was an area in Hadal Blacksite you despised since it showed you that the anglers can attack from the front. You stepped out of the locker once the angler passed by and turned on your flashlight. There’s no squiddles in this room so you decided to look through the drawers for anything useful.

In the corner of your eye, you swear you saw something moving in the dark water. It wasn’t the Eyefestation as you didn’t see a green glow. Instead, it was Z-8. You freeze once you finally realized it, and you clicked your flashlight off. They looked like they were just passing by, but they suddenly turned to look at your general direction. Did they somehow sense you turning it off?

“Are you alive?”

You actually freeze up this time. It was a voice inside your head, but it wasn’t like Eyefestation where it tried to mimic the voice of the person in the PA. This was its own voice.

“I can sense you there,”

You start taking shallow breaths, almost resorting to holding it.

“Don’t worry. I can’t reach you. But when I do, it’s not personal,” it continues, “We’re both fighting for what we want, right? Freedom from this place?”

You try to not listen, thinking it’s only try to persuade you into meeting up with it. Maybe even striking up some sort of deal.

“I wish this wasn’t how we met, but I owe Sebastian. This is my favor to him,” its tone suddenly changes, “We can’t let you get that crystal,”

“…they owe Sebastian?” You whispered to yourself.

The Eyefestation suddenly emerges from the dark, and Z-8 swims out of her way as her eyes turned red. A new voice cried inside your head, pleading for you to look into its eyes. The next thing you knew, you were back in the room with Sebastian who stifled a laugh as he slides over the document to you. You had questions concerning what Z-8 had said, but maybe now’s not the right time to ask.

“For unknown reasons, Z-8 is somehow able to communicate with Z-317 “The Eyefestation.” Should operatives see Z-8 outside the windows, or hear its voice, DO NOT LISTEN and keep moving forward as they cannot reach you. They have already called “The Eyefestation” and are trying to keep you in the room.”

Sebastian closes the document, still trying to keep himself from laughing, “A tag-team! Who would’ve thought, huh?”

You rolled your eyes, “I can’t believe that’s how I died,”

“Like a deer in headlights,” he smirks as he leans closer, “Happens to all of us, but man, I thought you’d be used to seeing that shark considering the amount of times you looked at her,”

“She just startled me! I’d love to look at her if she wasn’t able to kill me just by making me look at her,” you shrugged, “She is a beautiful shark,”

Sebastian gives you an odd look and groans, “Get out of here already,”

“Fair enough,”

The next few deaths to Z-8 were more of trial and error. In your most recent death, you learned the hard way that Z-8 does not like the flash beacon and did not hesitate to detonate your PDG. You felt like it was a strange reaction considering it took them a moment to even react when you used any other light source.

“Got grabbed again, did ya?” Sebastian laughed.

He then slides the document to you, now revealing the entire document with some text still left redacted. Some documents contained those, such as his own, and you learned to stop caring about it. At least it wasn’t like the Multi-Monster. Previously redacted photo was now uncovered. A person whose face was obscured.

Z-8 - Codename: Nihilism. Real name: ▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇

In early 2011, five LR-Ps were selected to be a part of an experiment to achieve immortality. Out of the five selected, only Z-8 survived the first round of tests. Z-9, Z-10, Z-11, and Z-12 all succumbed to different effects as each subject was given a different dosage. Although Z-8 survived, they were not immune to the effects their dosage brought. As a result, the experiment was left on hold until researchers found a better source to reach the desired goal.

By 2013, the experiment resumed using the immortal jellyfish as originally planned along with the mimic octopus, the ▇▇▇, and ▇▇▇▇. Z-8 was used again for the next test and hasn’t experienced any side effects on the first day. Two days later, a guardsman escorting Z-8 noticed they have been stumbling and bumping into the walls. On the seventh day, Z-8 had gone completely blind. However, it has been noted that Z-8 is capable of sensing where there is light and where someone is even if they are not moving.

Z-8 soon began to struggle walking and can’t seem to have a tight grip. It didn’t take very long for them to lose all feeling in their arms and legs. They were still able to move their torso as well as their head. They were still capable of speech, but Z-8 has been refusing to talk.

Z-8 was meant to be executed due to the state they were in, but thirty minutes after their heart seemingly stopped, it soon started to beat again. They wake up an hour later as if they had just taken a nap with all of their memories still intact, but Z-8 still cannot see and still cannot walk or move their arms. This resulted in having to move Z-8’s location into a more suitable cell for testing.

Z-8 has endured 5 deaths before changes in their body started becoming clear. Shortly after, testing and studying the regenerative properties Z-8 should have began. Due to poor execution during the procedures, Z-8 ended up enduring 7 more deaths. By the 4th death, a new side effect to Z-8’s resurrection was noted. Upon death, coral (polyps) begins to form on their body.

Their body soon takes the form of a humanoid jellyfish, leading to having to relocate them again. Z-8 no longer turns to others when they are near until they shine a light. The behavior they show gives the impression they like the light and often try to follow it, sometimes moving their head or even their entire body.

Z-8 will then be used to study the regenerative properties further until it can be refined in a way that is desirable.

Before the lockdown was in effect, Z-8 was going to be sold at The Anomalous Auctions as Z-8 had been deemed of no monetary value, nor can be used for work. 5 hours into the lockdown, camera footage caught Z-13 transporting Z-8 to an unknown location.

If by chance any operative encounters Z-8 within any flooded rooms, it is advised to remain still and turn off any light source currently in possession. Wait for Z-8 to pass.

DO NOT move as Z-8 can sense you nearby, but they can’t differentiate between a corpse and a living person until you move.

Turn off any and all light sources in your possession as Z-8 can sense it and become curios. Your window to turn it off is narrow, but it’s still wide enough to not raise their suspicion.

There is a chance where operatives may find Z-8 roaming in a dark flooded room with S-Q. If the room prior has lights on, Z-8 will go into that room. It is safe to move in the dark room as Z-8 cannot tell the difference between you and the S-Q.

For unknown reasons, Z-8 is somehow able to communicate with Z-317 “The Eyefestation.” Should operatives see Z-8 outside the windows, or hear its voice, DO NOT LISTEN and keep moving forward as they cannot reach you. They have already called “The Eyefestation” and are trying to keep you in the room.

Unlike Z-13, operatives are instructed to contain Z-8 as it is impossible for the subject to stay dead.

You’re not exactly sure what to say to all of this. Sebastian is being much quieter than usual too, not even closing the document when you sat back. You look up at him, building up the courage to speak.

“So that’s what they meant when they said they owe you…”

“They don’t owe me anything,” his voice lowered into a growl, “It was their choice to stay much like that shark,”

You look down at the document again and sighed, “Kinda feels like there’s much more than that,”

“Don’t you have somewhere to be?”

You sighed again as you stood up to leave. Sebastian watches you go and looks back down at the document, then closes it without another word.

[fxirybun]

☔️ PAC : what does the universe wants you to know ?

it has been a while since i last made a spiritual-related pac :'D

this is a collective reading ! take what resonates and leave what doesn't. i cannot guarantee 100% accuracy. take the pac reading lightly ჱ̒ ｰ̀֊ｰ́ )

ෆ⸒⸒ UMBRELLA ☂️

the first thing i'm picking up on is how the people you've who have treated you badly will receive their karma. the universe isn't letting their wrongdoings slide off very easily , because they knew how much you were hurt by these individuals. divine justice to put it into simple words. the universe wants to remind you that they're always by your side , even if you don't seem to feel it. perhaps you've been ignoring some subtle signs that they're trying to show you , due to how preoccupied you are at the moment.

whilst it's okay for you to pour your precious time into things you need to prioritize , i'm getting this sad energy from them. it seems that some of you have been ignoring your spiritual side , not being able to nurture it. the universe is encouraging you to connect with your beliefs or the religion you're part of. "do not forget them" is what i'm hearing for this reading session. they knew that you've put in the work , but now it's just a matter of waiting for the results to thrive.

i felt this impatient energy that was emitting , which made me think that you shouldn't rush into things. remind yourself that what you've been investing in will grow , but on its own time. somehow i'm getting that some of you may have bound themselves in this vicious cycle. it's like there's this negative weight or toxicity that is holding you back from continuing your life. the universe is asking you to evaluate yourself if you're feeling ungrounded or trapped in this circumstance.

whatever this situation may be , it seems to me that it's blocking you from trying to start something fresh on your part. some of you may have been feeling unmotivated or perhaps fatigued about their well-being. it's as if you want to do an activity yet you cannot seem to do so. nevertheless , the universe wants you to know that you shouldn't be stressing too much about this feeling that's engulfing you. this "thing" that you're currently experiencing will be temporary.

i do think that they gave this to you as a way for you to slowdown , down because some of you have been overworking themselves lately , not being able to take good care of themselves these days. even so , all things will pass and once you're ready , the energy you used to be familiar with , this igniting passion that makes you striver harder , will flow again.

EXTRAS : fire , air , & earth energies , capricorn , taurus , libra , aries , leo , sagittarius , mars , venus , saturn , "the truth will set you free" , "there's light at the end of the tunnel" , "don't let yourself be trap by your own fear" , "take time to nurture yourself" , 2 , 8 , 1 , 6 , G , F , K , X , E , 888 , 666 , 777 , 2:22 , 10:10 , sewing machine , peace , anchor , cat , grapes.

ෆ⸒⸒ BUTTERFLY 🦋

i'm sensing this ungrounded energy coming from you pile two. the universe is nudging you to be careful about your way of handling your money right now. some of you may have been overspending on things that they don't even need. it's like you saw something online that caught your attention and how you have the urge to buy it straight away. you could be feeling a bit out of control with it , especially your responsibilities in your life.

the universe is reminding you to check in with yourself and see if you’re being realistic about your way of using your resources. lately , it seems that some of you may have been experiencing some problems with a person who embodies the earth's energy (taurus , virgo , capricorn). whoever this person is around you currently , isn’t living up to their commitments. some of you were being partnered up or working with them and how this dynamic isn't working out between you and this person.

you may show yourself being calm amidst it , trying to get yourself together and maintaining your composure. some of you may also feel frustrated with a project that you've been working on where things just aren’t clicking for you. you felt as if you were not receiving enough support towards this thing you're putting efforts on. the universe thinks that it’s time for you to step back and think about whether you should take the lead or even approach it differently , think outside the box.

you should give yourself a pat on the back because you’ve done the work and your part in whatever position you're currently in. try to acknowledge your hard work and give yourself some credit for everything you have done as of now. you've planted those seeds , and whilst it may feel that the progress is slow and off-putting , the universe wants you to trust them that your efforts will someday pay off. just keep on nurturing what you’ve started.

they are also encouraging you to lean on some structure from someone you respect. this could be someone who has more experience than you or a friend that you trust the most who can help you find your way through any obstacles. it's like the universe seems to be saying , “take a step back , reassess how you’re managing your matters , and don’t hesitate to seek guidance when it is needed”.

EXTRAS : prominent earth energy , taurus , capricorn , saturn , mars , venus , "connect with your own power" , "forming an alliance with others" , "just keep swimming" , "the truth is within reach" , 2 , 3 , 6 , 4 , A , W , F , N , D , 000 , 999 , 11:11 , 1:11 , 333 , owl , clover , music , horse , eiffel tower.

ෆ⸒⸒ FLOWER BOUQUET🪻

hi there pile three ! it seems to me that some of you may be resisting changing themselves for their own good , holding onto something that’s no longer fulfilling you. this thing could be about a romantic connection with someone that feels like it's stuck at a standstill. it's like there's no progress going on between you and this person and how either you or them aren't willing to end it. perhaps the other person doesn't want to change their mindset or actions that are seen as a red flag.

even though this connection or relationship gave you butterflies , there are times wherein you feel like you're the only one who's putting the effort here. the people who know about you , especially those who are aware of you being with this person aren't supportive of it. "out of all the fishes out there , why him / her ?" is what i'm channeling. they also seem to notice how fed up or tired your expression is each time you interact with them.

nevertheless , whether it's a situation , a habit , or a connection with someone else , the universe is telling you to let go of this connection. you knew to yourself that you felt stuck , fully aware of something that needs to end , yet you’re dragging your feet on it. it's as if the universe is saying , "hey , there's a strong bond here but you need to look at it from a different angle". some of you are being encouraged to nurture this relationship because it will act as a guide for you through the inevitable changes you're resisting.

i sensed that you may be feeling torn about needing to make a choice whether to move forward with this relationship or to break it. some of you may as well be trying to avoid or confront this problem because you still haven't listed down the things , be it pros or cons , about the dynamic you're experiencing with this person. it's like deep within yourself , you're afraid that you're going to make the wrong decision to cut them off completely.

the universe wants you to know that you should follow what your intuition or your instincts are telling you. if you feel like you're always in this heavy energy , that's a sign for you to cut that person off. the phrase "hang in there" kept on repeating in my mind , you need to stand strong despite the challenges you're facing inside or outside of the romantic connection.

EXTRAS : water , air , & fire energies , scorpio , cancer , libra , sagittarius , pluto , venus , moon , 2s , "now we are starting all over again" , "performing physical activities to clear up the mind" , "nurture the body and the soul" , "keeping in touch with your lover" , "starting a new chapter" , 1 , 3 , 6 , 0 , H , J , W , T , P , 333 , 10:10 , 222 , 777 , 1:11 , grapes , firefly , yin & yang , pumpkin , one wing.

[thinkerschnapp]

who is the main character in stranger things?

spoiler alert: it's Will Byers and there are reasons

"but El is the main character?!"

WRONG. she's the face of the show only because she has powers but plot wise....she adds nothing.

yes, Eleven has her own storyline of being in the lab (which should've ended after season 1). the Kali/8 plot in season 2 didn't add much. season 3 added a refreshing side to Eleven where she forgets about the lab stuff and tries to be a normal 13 year old girl. but then the rest of the season she spends doing nothing but trying to find Billy. in season 4 we see her trying to fit in at school and it's a great story up until the lab stuff comes up again. people will say that the s4 lab plot was necessary but...was it? even without the lab plot we still would've found out about Vecna being 001 because of the vision Nancy had. the lab plot could've been done in 2 episodes but it went on for way too long and there were many unnecessary scenes. the thing is how much does Eleven know about the upside down? nothing but the monsters existence and that 001 is there.

"how did we find out about the upside down stuff then?"

Will. in season 1, Will went missing in the UD and survived a whole week. In season 2, Will got possessed by the mind flayer and the tunnels were discovered. In season 3 and 4, Wills storyline moved to a more personal growth story but his experience with the UD still helped the supernatural plot. In s3, Will helped with his knowledge of being possessed (loss of control, weakness to fire/heat etc). In s4, despite not being in Hawkins, he still helped. Nancy remembered that Will managed to find a way to communicate with Joyce through lights, this saved the fruity four from the UD when they got stuck. The fire/heat weakness made a comeback in both the Hawkins and Russia plot. They would've never known about this factor if Will wasn't possessed, they would've stuck with the guns to defeat monsters.

However...

The Hawkins group still lost against Vecna because they didn't know enough. Eleven couldn't even defeat him because despite knowing about the lab stuff, she didn't know that Vecna is stronger than the demogorgons therefore her powers weren't enough. Nancy, Robin and Steve couldn't defeat him because despite knowing about the fire weakness, they also didn't know Vecna was stronger therefore the he only got damaged not killed.

Here's where Will comes in to save Hawkins

We all know now that Will is going to be the main focus of season 5 and that plot holes in season 1 will be resolved. Throughout the last 4 seasons, Will hasn't talked about his experience in the UD at all so nobody (not even us) knows about how he communicated through the christmas lights despite not seeing the letters on the wall, or how he talked to Joyce through the gate thing in the wall, or how he didn't immediately die, or how he has a neck sense connected to the UD.

But Will does and this means season 5 will include Will being the hero. Once he finds out about the Henry/001 part of Vecna (because there's no way Vecna didn't have some sort of involvement in Wills disappearance), Will will know exactly how to defeat the UD once and for all.

And let's be honest, Eleven fatigue is real. We're all bored with her superpowers/lab plot. There are tons of other characters for a reason, they are all smart in their own ways and have their strengths in defeating the UD (such as Dustin and his big science brain)

I've never done a post like this so if it doesn't make sense, the blame is entirely on my inexperience :)

[mysticfalls01]

Princesa II

(FC Barcelona x reader)

Part 1

Alexia never thought about being a mother as her full focus was on her career however that changed the minute, she met you.

You brought out a side of her that she never imagined tapping out. You brought out her maternal instinct, you brought her joy and a new vision of life.

Not only did you brought out all of that to her, but you also brought out a new light for the team. The team was immediately impacted by your energy, your passion, and your ability to feel. As professional athletes they sometimes forgot that they also were humans, that it was alright to cry, to get frustrated and to be happy.

You were one of the greatest gifts that the team had ever received and they couldn’t wait to see you shine.

The first time your teammates heard you call Alexia mama you immediately became the target of jokes and teasing especially from Claudia and Patri however, they were met with Alexia’s glare as she told them that they were going to do two extra laps. The rest of your teammates immediately stopped as they didn't wanted to be the target of La Reina's rage.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Playing at the Johan was a feeling that you wouldn’t change for anything. The excitement, the fans that had your back and the support of your teammates always made it special.

You and your teammates were preparing for the match against Sevilla. Before leaving the locker room to lineup you heard Frido’s voice.

“Unge come here! You need to put your sunscreen on!”

“Fridoo I already applied on my sunscreen” you said whining.

“Really kid?” She said rising her eyebrow.

“No” you admitted with a defeating voice.

You gave up and walked towards Frido so she could apply her sunscreen on your face.

“Andd it’s done kid, you are free to go” Frido said.

“What do we say frilla?” You herd Alexia’s voice behind you.

“Thank you aunty Frido” you said and gave her a kiss on her cheek

“No problem kid” she answered with a smile.

After that you guys went to the tunnel for the game, you were nervous as it was the first time that you were in the starting 11. Before Alexia reached her spot at the beginning of the line, she quickly hugged you and whispered “Hija, I’m so proud of you. It’s time to show everyone why you are Barcelona’s princess”

“Thank you mama” was all you said before she had to leave.

“Amiga we have your back, so don’t worry and believe it you’ve earned your spot in the team” you heard Aitana say before everyone started walking out.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

The game ended 8-0 with you scoring a hat trick in the first half of the game. You were subbed off around the 60th minute, as you were leaving the pitch to give the entrance to your teammate you heard for the first a chant that eventually would become iconic.

“Con la reina de nuestro lado la princesa brillará y nuestro reino blaugrana prevalecerá” (With the queen on our side the princess will shine and our Blaugrana kingdom will prevail)

You gave your teammate a high five so she could enter. You stayed by the line admiring the fans and the chant that they had created for you and Alexia. You always dreamed about having your chant and the culers made that dream come true.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

After joining Barcelona your skills flourished and everyone could notice it.

You were in the locker room playing with Jana and Bruna as the training session had just ended. While you were running around the locker room escaping from Bruna Ingrid’s voice called your attention “Princess! Your phone is ringing.”

After you heard her words, you ran and picked up your phone, you saw that the number calling started with London’s code. Usually, you wouldn’t answer numbers that you don’t have saved however, your instinct told you to answer the call.

“Hi?” you said with a shy voice.

“Hello is this y/n l/n’s number?” the other voice said, you could identify that voice had accent but couldn’t distinguish from where.

“Yes, it is, how can I help you?”

“Perfect! I’m Sarina Wiegman and I wanted to inform you that I want to call you up for the next international break.”

You couldn’t believe what you were hearing. From the other side of the locker room Ale saw your face and she and Mapi approached you.

After processing what you just you answered “Thank you, thank you, thank you. I promise that I will give it my all.”

Sarina laughed at your enthusiasm and spoke “I’m sure that you will! On the next couple of days, you will receive all the information. Can’t wait to meet you y/n!”

After that the call ended and you felt Mapi giving you a hug, you guys separated, and Ale asked with a soft voice “What’s happening hija?”

You looked at her and said “I did it mama, I just spoke with Sarina Wiegman. I’ve been called up for the next international break! I’ve played with the under 19’s team but I didn’t expect to get the call up for the senior team!”

After hearing those words all your teammates that were in the locker room immediately ran to you and hugged you. It wasn’t until you heard AMC jokingly groaning that you separated.

“England is having a friendly against Switzerland. Ohh you’ll be a headache to play against kid”

“Prepare yourself Ana, la princesa is going to score against you” Leila said with a joking tone.

All you did was smile until you remembered something.

“Mama, I must call Ona to tell her about the call up! I’ll be back shortly” you said before leaving the room.

As you left the room all Ale could do was to stare at you with a proud face, she knew that this was only the beginning of your international journey.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Olga and Ale took you to the airport.

“Yes mama, I’ll make sure to call you every day!”

“And?”

“If something is bothering me, I’ll tell you.”

“Perfect hija! When you land send me a text and when you arrive to SGP too!”

“I will!”

As she saw you leave all she could think was that la princesa de Barcelona was about to have her international debut and the other countries won’t know what was about to hit them

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Part 3

[skylinesnsunshines]

pac: july messages -`♡´-

hi everyone! welcome to my first pac <3 today i will be channeling messages on your energy for july. please remember that this is all for entertainment purposes only and energies are subject to change, so if it doesn't resonate then it might not be the pile or reading for you. also remember that this is a general reading, so I'm channelling the energy of the collective rather than a specific individual. if you're after a personal reading click here to look at my prices and message me for details. without further ado! let's get started.

photo credits go to pinterest, i don't own any of these photos

pile 1 ~ knight of wands, 6 of wands rx, justice, hanged man rx

hello my pile 1's! i feel such a light energy for you all. immediately i channelled that you've successfully overcome a situation that has caused you anguish. it could have been a major situation/change for you, but you could feel like there are other things to worry about so you brush it off. spirit wants me to remind you to celebrate the small wins, and enjoy a victory while you can. life will always bring you unexpected events that can alter your focus, so staying in the present and reminding yourself to give yourself a pat on the back is necessary (you've come so far!). now, i feel like you have a lot of ideas and visions but you don't necessarily know the steps to achieve them. you might not enjoy planning due to you being easily overwhelmed, and you can even be a person who enjoys "winging it" as i'm hearing the phrase "fuck it we ball" LMAO. now your spontaneity and creativity are definitely something to be proud of, however, spirit's telling me to encourage you to break down your ideas and have them be more digestible so you can plan accordingly. i see that you have all the tools for success within yourself, but you need to be a bit more calculated in your journey to avoid burnout. remember to invite balance in your daily life, and remember that rest is as important as movement. you might feel frustration towards plans that don't come to fruition, but just remember that everything that is meant for you won't ever pass you. time is a construct and every person's timing is different, so please stop comparing yourself to others. learn to let your emotions flow and listen to your body, as i feel that some of you may have a tendency to pick yourself up and brush it off when met with failure. while your resilience is commendable, remember that you are not a robot and you are always allowed to sit in your sorrows and mourn. you are such a light in this world my pile 1's, and your resilience often inspires others to continue going on in life as well. remember that every experience is a learning lesson, and not everything is so black/white. you got this my superstars! remember who you are and the power you hold <3

channelled song: i feel good - pink sweat$

oracle cards: bridge - successfully overcoming a problem, knot - unsuccessful plans, unicorn - using your intuition to make beneficial changes

pile 2 ~ queen of swords, 8 of pentacles, page of cups rx, death

hello my pile 2's! you seem to be focusing on your grind and have a goal that you are working toward to complete by the end of the year. i just wanna say that you may be experiencing a change emerging within yourself, whether that'd be physical or mental. your aura seems to be changing and that stems from how you present and carry yourself. i hear the word "tunnel vision" which tells me that you are zoning in on a certain skill that will bring you a lot of emotional fulfilment. i can also see that some of you may be focusing on improving your confidence which will help you realise your worth and be more cutthroat of your time and energy. you are taking back your power and realising that you are the architect of your own life, and no one can take that away from you. you are the go-getters, trailblazers and leaders who are always learning and bettering yourself which is so amazing to see. just know that the more you work on yourself and understand your soul, you will automatically attract others who will be able to reciprocate your energy and have the same motivation for growth as you. love could be on the cards as well, but i don't see anything major as i feel like you want to fall in love with yourself first. i feel a sense of priority when it comes to your well-being, and that anyone who would want to be a part of your life needs to be an addition as you are already whole. not everybody is worth your time my pile 2's, and saving your energy for those who you prioritise is what matters the most <3

channelled song: aura - got7

oracle cards: target - a goal-oriented person, vase - secret admirer, horse - a short journey

pile 3 ~ page of wands, 3 of cups, 7 of wands rx, 8 of cups rx

hello pile 3's! before i even pulled the cards, i envisioned that this upcoming month may be one of celebration for you! i see some of you graduating or entering a new job or school that will aid in your growth (congratulations angels!). i feel like july could be a social month for you, i see that you could be entering a new environment that could bring you into a new friend group. i feel like you are embarking on a journey (wether that'd be physical or mental), and you are feeling unprepared yet excited. i see an image of someone carrying a bindle (?) and having a bittersweet feeling of moving on. some of you might have been reluctant to move on from a place or a person, but in your heart, you know that it's right for you. you are ready for this and you are prepared! don't sweat the small stuff. in the song i channelled a lyric that goes "just a little something that i think i deserve" and i feel that it could resonate with some of you. remember that you are deserving of great things and you are allowed to seek other experiences if you feel that your current circumstances do not aid you in your growth. in your new environment, you might encounter people who don't see eye to eye with you, and that's okay as spirit encourages you to stay true to yourself and not change for anyone. you've got a strong sense of self and you know yourself better than anyone, so don't feel the need to conform to "fit in" as you will attract someone like-minded that you will get along with. your energy is infectious, and you are destined to seek experiences that encourage you from breaking free of being a big fish in a small pond. i'm excited for you my pile 3's! you got this <3

channelled song: cake and candy - rupaul

oracle cards: bull - do not back down from opposition. show strength and fortitude, horse - short journey, chair filled - someone new is entering your life

so that’s it for the reading! let me know if you have any feedback, questions or requests! my askbox is always open for a chat as well <3 sending you love and light always :) hope you enjoyed!

[wynnyfryd]

Trailer park Steve AU part 9

part 1 | part 8 | ao3

cw: medical emergency

He ditches his car at the top of the street, runs the rest of the way because there are too many people standing around — a small crowd of onlookers clustered at the bottom of the lane, gawking in their sleep shirts and flannels like the world isn’t trying to end for a fourth time. Fifth? He can’t keep track. He can’t even think, numb to everything but the pounding of his shoes against the pavement, the sirens wailing in his ears, the steady prayer in his pulse not her not now not both—

“Mom?” he shouts, voice cracking and raw. “Mom!!”

“It’s not for her.”

There’s a hand against his chest then, heel of a palm pressed to his sternum, and he slams into it like a brick wall. The air burns in his lungs; he can’t focus his eyes. “Wh-what?” he gets out, voice shaking, throat thick. Cold terror drools down his sweaty neck like the breath of a hungry monster. He’s a little kid again, swept up in the mayhem of a crowded mall. Where’s his mom; where’s his mom?

“Your mom’s in my house.” The voice is deep and slow, the hand flexing against his shirt. Fingers splayed. Heavy rings.

“…E-Eddie?” Steve’s vision swims, going yellow and purple then tunneling down to black, deep water filling his ears. Nothing makes any sense. “Munson, what—?”

“Your mom’s in my house,” he repeats like a mantra. Like a lighthouse in the fog, voice rumbling and sure. “She’s safe. She’s fine. You’re hyperventilating; take a breath.”

His breath is still catching quick and high in his throat, little puffs of cold mist. Can you drown in cold air? Can it condense inside your chest?

Eddie grips his shoulder, snaps his fingers in Steve’s face. “Hey. Hey, Steve? Come on, man, look at me. Steve. Look at me.”

Steve meets his gaze like the tide drawn to the moon.

“Deep breath,” he demonstrates, sucking air through an invisible straw, letting his chest and belly swell. Steve copies him until his vision starts to clear, until his heartbeat starts to calm. "That's it," Eddie tells him. "Good. Yeah, there we go."

Some hysterical part in the back of his brain wants to laugh. To start and never stop, just laugh and laugh and laugh until his fucking head explodes.

When he can breathe again, he pants weakly, “What is going on?”

Eddie guides him to a picnic table on the outskirts of the crowd, and they perch on top of it with their feet planted on the bench. The air feels calmer here.

Steve takes another breath.

Eddie points to the single-wide right next to Steve’s. “The wagon’s for your neighbor,” he grimaces in sympathy, one eye squinting shut as he cocks his head at Steve. “Ernie. You know him?”

“Mm.” Ernie Gerwitz. Late 60s, a widower with liver spots and arthritis in both hands. Bad heart, worse drinking habit. Fucking hates Steve’s mom because she backed over his begonias. “Not well.”

They didn’t interact much beyond an occasional neighborly nod, although Steve did once earn the guy’s good graces by yelling at Misty while shooing her off with a rake. (‘Little bitch left me a whole damn weasel last year,’ he’d grumbled as he stooped to pick up the newspaper. ‘Can't shoot her, though, 'cause she scares away the possums.’) And now…

Steve can’t make out much from here, just the shape of a four-man stretcher being carried out the door, strobe light streaks in his vision as the EMTs load up the van.

“Is he…” Steve gulps, clasping his hands between his knees. He doesn’t want to ask this question. The words taste moldy in his mouth. “Is he dead?”

Eddie’s hand shakes a little when he drags it down his cheek. His answer comes on a wobbly sigh, an almost melodic quality to the tension in his voice. “No-o idea, man. Your, uh, your mom, ya know, she— She found him. In, um. In the yard." "Jesus." "Said he was just, like... lying there. In the grass.” Eddie stares off into the distance like he’s seeing it right now; makes a wet clucking sound as his bottom lip quivers. “Thinks it was, a- a heart thing, or something? Shit, I don’t know. She was pretty freaked out when she knocked on my door.”

Steve can't picture it. He hasn’t seen her express a single true emotion since July.

A hesitant hitch of breath, and Eddie chews on his next words, tapping a hand against his thigh. “She’s, uh... she’s… calmer now. Or. At least-”

Steve rolls his eyes, knows exactly where this is going. Eddie tries again: “I mean, she seemed like-”

“Like a fucking zombie?” Steve supplies.

“Yeah,” Eddie huffs, a nervous laugh of relief. You said it, man, not me. There’s something serious in his gaze, something curious and searching.

Something almost kind. Steve shrinks away from it like a vampire in the sun. Go on, he wants to say, ask about the fucking pills. Wants to goad him into a fight, some mean, sharp thing inside him itching to see someone else bleed.

Steve bites his tongue until he tastes metallic tang. Copper covering mildew; fresh bloom coating decay. He swallows hard, lets them both slide down his throat — blood and ghosts, life and death. The River Styx must taste like pennies.

The siren starts again, and Eddie groans and hangs his head. “Christ," he murmurs to the dirt, “Wayne’s gonna be so bummed.”

They both watch in silence as the ambulance goes by.

—

part 10

okay same deal tagging whoever commented yesterday (if your settings will let me) you’re all delightful tysm 😘 @paintsplatteredandimperfect @thefreakandthehair @slutforcoffein @manda-panda-monium @munsonfamilybandalso @aliea82 @eddie-munsons-missing-nipple @lololol-1234 @hotluncheddie @pennyplainknits @disrespectedgoatman @carolinachickadee @insideiscold @acedorerryn @anne-bennett-cosplayer @violetsteve my actual wife blessings upon your house @lighthousebeams @steves-strapcollection @sirsnacksalot @stevesbipanic @slowandsteddie @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @so-get-this-sammy @annabanannabeth @runninriot @cuips-not-cute @a-little-unsteddie @envyadams-vs-me @ppunkpuppyy if i forgot anyone i’m sorry i am very sleep deprived

[opal-owl-flight]

Edge of Chaos.

Remember how 4 gave herself up to Overlorder in my SO interp...what if 3 gives themself up to a chaotic entity?

Uhhh "side Chaos" type what-if situation bc I was inspired by fucking Lego Monkey Kid of all things. Deets below! (And LMK ending/spoilers for those who watch.) Its VERY ALL OVER THE PLACE FORGIVE ME

"Listen, listen. I am the light outside your dark cave. Come to me, Ill set you free."

I think the argument that sways them is the fact that the ordered world is suffocating everyone. The world as it is, its Plato's cave. The unknown, the chaos, its whats outside. Remember how tye point of Side Order is that an Ordered World would be shit, bc itd mean something perfectly stagnant?

Chaos leans HARD into that. But does it in a way that tears the current world apart. Burns whats going bad, but also whats going good.

"Look at everyone, writhing in pain, trying to fit in.

Wouldnt it be better, if those boxes were all gone?"

It slithers to whisper in 3s ear.

"Including yours?"

It starts with arguing abt the world's state. And then it pierces them where it hurts.

A life that they couldve lived. Alt3, yknow. A life outside the war.

...they look so much happier there...

The voice of chaos goes on, convincing them that if they join It, the world will be saved by them, which ALREADY gets them on board almost immediately. Then with the promise of a life better than what they have rn? Its the best of both worlds. They save the world, one final time, then they'll be free.

Theyre caught, theres no way out.

----

3 bowing to Chaos to save the world. Because its the only way for everyone to live a life beyond these secret wars. To live a life beyond the strict tenets the current world presses upon them. The world they carried all these years, and for what? Everyone STILL being stuck in those boxes? Status quo that wasnt the best thing in the first place? ("The world was breaking even before you started doing something about it.")

Theyre sick of having to keep the world the way it is. They gave EVERYTHING for this war. Theyve had enough.

3 finally living a life, like what 4 and 8 have been begging them to do, but oops. Oops. The rest of the world would get torn to shreds. A "burn everything down and start over" deal.

What makes it different from Order, then?

They cant think of that now, theyre finally free.

----

4 gave up her chaos in SO bc she thought that is what itll take for 3 to accept her again. 3 gave up their order in this hypothetical bc they wanted to set the world free, but also so that they can be fully with 4s chaos.

----

This ALL STARTED bc the mc of the show kept saying that it has to be him who saves the world, theres no other way. Which is...something 3 does on the damn regular. They carry the hero role and give this burden to no one else. To the ends of the earth, til the end of their life.

The lesson of this is "do things in moderation" -- that making the world a better place starts with little steps. Filling in the cracks. Some things work, dont burn everything to the ground so fast.

And most important of all. Stick together.

Which is a lesson 3 learns.

-----

Neat design note: 4 has her black tipped tentacles from SO. 3 would get white-tipped ones from this thing.

Why white? Besides being the opposite of Overlorder's black ink, it represents its narrative of being the light at the end of the tunnel/out the ("ordered boxes"/destiny/etc) cave theming for chaos.

When they look at themself in tge mirror after what theyve done, they see someone unrecognizable AGAIN.

They thought for themself this time. And the world went to shit. Were they really the only pillar?

now they look even more dead than before. Is this really the life they were promised?

The one they wanted?

[ipegchangbin]

saw u reblog a pervy changbin post 😩 spare some pervy skz thoughts maybe 🤲

— skz and perverted thoughts.

sub ! skz ot8 , dom ! gn ! reader 

🏷️ perversion. somnophilia. voyeurism. blasphemy. invasion of privacy. individual scenarios of 8 pining perverts. sorry anon for the late response!

— you’re the reason why bang chan never sleeps.

he knows that neither of you are together…yet. you usually sleep over at his place though, a one-bedroom apartment with an uncomfortable couch, so you’re forced to sleep next to him. chan never tells you this but he gets hard every night you sleep over. he refuses to admit—no, he will never admit that he gets hard to the idea of you sleeping soundly next to him, in nothing but your sleepwear. 

chan constantly thinks about waking you up from your sleep after you’ve taken your clothes off. chan knows that you sleep without underwear — he watched you slip into your pants without putting anything under — and he wants your bare skin on his. he hasn’t seen your eyes fluttered shut in slumber since you two face away, but he thinks about how you could dominate him with the mere awakening of your irises. he wants to shock you so that you can shock him back. chan wants to feel your heavy breath on his heavier exhales instead of the gentle sighs he so desperately wants to wake. he wants to grind on your legs, dig his face in your neck, and whine as you take care of him while half-awake. 

but no, he can’t have that, he can never have that, so he fantasizes. stroking his cock, once, twice, thrice, four times, while you count your sheep to slumber at the same pace.

— minho feasts on whatever eye candy you are.

he can only keep to himself for so long, staring from the chair opposite yours. he’s too dignified; minho hasn’t made his feelings clear with himself, let alone you, so he can’t do much. all he can do is look from a distance. stare. drill his eyes into every single inch of your smooth skin until his pupils dilate. fuck, you’re just his type. oh god, you’re so close yet so far. 

and he wants you to be close. close the physical distance. close in on the friendship and become something more. close, moan “minho, i’m so close.” he wants to have you cum on him, finally let yourself go after ruining him to the point he’s writhing and crying under you. after staring at your hands intertwined with your best friend’s, he realized so badly that he wants your hands on his neck, knocking the wind out of his system. choke him until he wiggles and begs wordlessly for breath—or for more? he can’t tell. he’d be willing to give up the act of being so stuck-up around you and offer a rare sight that only you can see. but no.

the only sight you see of him is a good friend zoning out. minho looks so distant but he’s there, fantasizing, daydreaming about your body, how fucking good you would sound while praising him. you’re so distant, yet you’re right there, like a mere feast for his eyes, but he wants you to eat him alive, feast on him the same way.

— it’s only you who can distract changbin.

your voice echoes through his head. changbin can’t focus on anything else and his vision tunnels. you’re the light at the end of it.

you told him off numerous times to do his job right. it had been a bad day and he tried to sympathize with you — but getting turned on from being scolded doesn’t count. he can’t help the thought of being told to shut up before being called all sorts of names. he daydreamed about getting pounded on the desk, the chair—maybe the floor, where you can ride and degrade him? he wants your fitted suits discarded alongside his. changbin just wants you to lose it on him, use him to let every drop of anger out, slap him, mark him, spit on him, use him. show your true colors instead of acting polite. break in front of him the way he breaks beneath you.

suddenly, you tapped his shoulder, then his screen, sternly reminding him to “get the fuck back to work, darling.” he’d shift his legs to hide his painful and leaking erection.

the cycle continued. you’d scold him, he’d get too horny to function, making you scold him again until it was only the both of you in left the office working overtime. it’s so wrong, getting off on your emotions that you almost can’t control. but damn it, your voice is too pretty, he wants to hear it scream, tell him off, again and again.

— you made hyunjin question everything.

the search bar has “friend walked in on me masturbating.” hyunjin can’t believe he typed that. it’s so unlike him to search for things that weren’t substantial, but maybe self-discovery is just as important. you aren’t watching anymore. but the question just…doesn’t quite cut it. 

he types again. “friend walked in on me masturbating but i liked it.” the results are dubious, some suggesting that it’s normal. some are porn videos — he watched as a lean, tall man got pinned down by another person, getting punished by someone peeping on him. he’s deleting the words key per key, tapping backspace until he’s on the last few letters. “i think i like my friend.” no, he already knew that long ago. “i want to fuck my friend.” no, he’d been fantasizing about that for years. you’re the reason why he masturbated in the first place, thinking of how you could ruin him, fuck his mouth with your crotch, drain him of his cum, fucking his own release back into himself. holy shit, hyunjin, that’s so bad, so bad…

“i want my friend to fuck me.” bingo. but not quite — he just can’t remove the image of your shocked, flustered face, the way you went all red, the way you hesitated and panicked. did you like what you saw? because his dick does.

hyunjin types again. “voyeurism kink guide.”

— jisung shouldn’t get too excited over you.

shock was written all over his face when he found out you liked him back, that you rejected your other best friend all because of him. imagine him riding the highs of the validation, basking in the image of you two being a couple. he loved that you saw nobody else but him.

imagine him riding his pillow to chase his high of release, basking in the image of that plush material being your lower half instead. he loved that you fucked nobody else but him.

maybe he got too pumped over the wrong things. shutting the door behind him and refusing to eavesdrop any longer, he shoved his pants down, frantically freeing his hard cock, and thought of you. you, possessive, in love with him as he was with you. jisung wanted you to own him, make him yours. he wanted to be shoved in between your arms and held up on the wall first before plummeting to the bed, whining and crying nothing but your name. he wants to forget his own. he wants the hands of his longtime crush to crush him and leave his ass bruised and his back arched.

he’s filthy. jisung stared at his hands, coated in cum that won’t stop flowing, wondering if you’re cool dating someone whose first thought about you was sex. sex with feelings, he swears, but he huffs and keeps going, overstimulating himself.

— it was you and a train ride felix couldn’t stand.

he was trying to read the tale of orpheus and eurydice, standing in the moving train, but he ripped his eyes off his book the minute you stood in front of him. stunning, amazing. curse god for making the train cramped today, his erection kept brushing against your legs.

felix felt fire surge between his legs as he took a whiff of your scent, an alluring aroma making its way down his system. you looked like a dream, like a doll that god herself sculpted out of love. he wanted to get a taste of you. he wondered if this is what couples in public transport felt like, dragging their hands down each other, feeling the other up through and under the layers of clothing. how much could he leak when one of your fingers traces down his v-line? felix wondered about the thrill of getting caught, the thought of whimpering just a little too loud for other people to hear, to shift his legs in the wrong way, hitting the wrong person, alerting everyone of your lewd antics. but why, why did he want you to do this to him?

you stood tall until you didn’t, losing balance on him. you thanked felix for catching you, but you didn’t turn his direction for long. like orpheus, he followed you, his eurydice: he can’t let you face him after everything he imagined. he tried not to drool and stared at the back of your head, hoping to only see your face after the train ride.

— seungmin’s the sinner you shouldn’t forgive.

was it his fault if you locked eyes with him first? he looked at the altar and scanned the image of the deity before him, questioning his morals, a feeling he hadn’t felt ever since he kept a penny to himself in first grade. 

he heard you chant in the pew beside him. “i offer my body to you.” he heard you say it, over and over, parts of your body folding into prayer position. you were hypnotizing to witness. seungmin couldn’t help but eye down your irresistible features, watched the glow from the lights hit your face and body in just the right way. he wanted to touch you, a living statue, and he wanted to put a show in front of the altar. he wanted you to ruin him, his upper half hunched over the head of the kneeler. or maybe he wanted to kneel in front of you as he took you in his mouth, tasting every bit of you, licking every drop of your essence as if it were holy water.

you were a fallen angel. sent from the clouds down to the earth to test his temptation, and he was giving in. but you weren’t a messenger, you betrayed your god, and you indulged in his sin, never forgiving him, damning him to the flames of lust for an eternity. he’s gross, but you’re an angel, and he’s chanting his prayer:

“corrupt me, corrupt me, corrupt me, i surrender myself, my body and life, all to you…”

— you should put jeongin where he belongs.

he’s insecure. for the first time in the decade-long relationship, he’s insecure about his place in your commitment. jeongin wasn’t sure if you loved him that much.

that was, until he “accidentally” found your journal entries. he also “stumbled upon” the messages you wrote about him to your friends. he remembered this thrill, similar to the time in the early stages of your relationship where he’d snoop on things such as your plush toys, shirts, underwear…he got a bottle of your perfume just to spritz it on his pants, pretending you were jerking him off from below.

now here he was, surfing through your written words about how much you loved jeongin. you truly loved your boyfriend — but nobody was like him, fucking into his own hand while seeing you gush over him in your friend’s messages. he wanted you to gush all over his cock, his body, his face, only to slap him and scold him, forcing your arms on his cheeks to make him face you in fear. he wanted you to stop him from dealing with your stuff, telling him to mind his own things — exactly the same way you found out he was messing with your underwear before.

jeongin’s thinking please, just please, put me in place, don’t make me go anywhere else, i’ll never doubt you again. i’ll drown in you. 

[vitaminseetarot]

PAC: Random Messages You May Need 🌈🎆⛅

Sup, y'all. I'm finally back for another pick a card reading. I really apologize if folks have not heard from me over the past month, I meant to get this reading (among other things) out a while ago. I have not been able to touch tarot for the past few weeks. Life has been… topsy turvy, to say the least. Heh heh. [sweating profusely]

I meant to have another game out and to have paid readings available by now--that is still part of the plan. What was meant for June will be in July. So this blog might go from 0 to 100 mph real soon, to move along with plans as intended!

I was loosely inspired by the Baker pride flag from 1978 for this group selection. These piles are pretty nondescript: each one contains a random message that may resonate with you. Pick based on whichever color of the Prism Oracle speaks to you most, and feel free to choose more than one. Take only what resonates.

Pile 1 - Strength (Red) Pile 2 - Happiness (Orange) Pile 3 - Illumination (Yellow) Pile 4 - Movement (Green) Pile 5 - Flow (Turquoise) Pile 6 - Trust (Blue) Pile 7 - Intuition (Violet) Pile 8 - Love (Pink)

Pile 1 - Strength (Red)

10 of Swords, Insight

You've been asked by the universe to put up with a lot, especially recently. You're reaching a finish line of a very long and brutal marathon. There have been too many times where you questioned whether or not to throw in the towel. If you have, you may also have questioned whether or not it was the correct choice. Sometimes, things don't work out, and it's better to move on. It can be difficult to hold everything up when one thing after another seems to fall apart at the seams, but either way you're being reminded of the light at the end of this long and turbulent tunnel.

Collect yourself, pick up what pieces you can. Time has shifted everything, but the essentials still stand. Gather the wisdom you have learned from this ordeal. There is still beauty to be found in the decay, glittering gems in the rough.

Maybe you don't want to get stronger. Healing may feel like a better option than grinding for difficult experience points. Give yourself the rest and repair you need. Let go of only that which is keeping you from starting again, but you don't need to throw the baby out with the bathwater. You've gained so much wisdom and strength, this trial wasn't without gain. Treasure it and begin anew.

Pile 2 - Happiness (Orange)

2 of Swords, Clarity

Whatever answers you seek are coming to you. Or perhaps they've already arrived; open your eyes and see for yourself. You may be wondering which path will satisfy you more. The process of reconciling this could take forever unless you lean on your gut here. This can't be decided based on intellect alone, for you could get stuck mulling it over for days. Imagining all the different possible outcomes could be taxing for your brain, so narrow it down. Eliminate the weakest links and home in on what excites you. It should feel like an "aha, yes!"

If you cannot see the answer right away, go within to the realm of imagination. Feel your way through. Visualize not just with sight but with yearning. Does the light of the sun make you feel hopeful? Does the cool rain make you feel relaxed? Would an art class expand your capacity to imagine many things, or would taking a science class?

The X mark in 2 of Swords is like a railroad crossing sign. Redirect that train of thought into brighter and more positive avenues of expression. Say "what if" as if you can't wait for something to happen. "What if I saw a shooting star tonight? What if my cute neighbor asked me out?" Let the future shine its beacon for you. It will all make sense in due time.

Pile 3 - Illumination (Yellow)

Ace of Cups, Reconciliation

Have you been staying up way too late trying to figure everything out? Please give yourself a brain curfew: no problem solving or saving the day after 10 pm! I'm getting that you may tend to ruminate on the same strong emotions. For some I'm getting that there is a crush here. There's inconsistent text messaging. I know it's easy to get too nervous about their reply, but try to wait until at least the next day to hear back. They may need time to formulate their words right. They may not even see your message straight away. Take it all in stride and sleep on it; if they want to reach out to you, then they eventually will.

For others in this pile, you may be going through a rough patch with another person right now and could be wondering how things will pan out. Give them time to respond, they could still be processing it. Stay on the more positive end of things with the idea that things will work themselves out. I feel like if you can manage this in a relaxed and non hurried way, the knot will untangle easily. The coffee in the Ace of Cups is very hot, so give it a chance to cool.

There is opportunity in your near future to make up for something that went awry due to a miscommunication error. You may get a chance to make up for a test, appointment, or an interview. You will receive grace for any mishaps. Remember that tomorrow won't necessarily be the same as today, so cherish both the good you have now along with the good that soon awaits you.

Pile 4 - Movement (Green)

IX Hermit, Devotion

Looks like things are progressing faster than you even thought they would. You may be blinking your eyes in partial disbelief: could this ball really be rolling? Indeed, thanks to your efforts, goals are being met and results are more evident by the day. You eschewed a lot of distractions to make this work, so give yourself a pat on the back for the level of commitment you put into it. Some of you in this pile may have just graduated, if so then congratulations! But try not to get too comfortable with your laurels, for you have a long road ahead of you in whatever you do next. This one completion is the start of many.

Does that thrill you? If so, wonderful! On the other hand, some of you may be feeling uncertain about continuing. You may be reviewing your options to see if this really is worth pursuing. Something that requires a lot of dedication and focus on it to the exclusion of all else… yeah, I can see how that can get tiring after a long time. There are folks who can get their Master's right after their Bachelor's, or have another child right after the first, but people can also happily move on to what feels more right for them instead.

It's okay to stop and assess your tracks if necessary. Taking time off is not the same as quitting. It's not losing motivation, it's recovering it. This is your passion and your discipline, not anyone else's. If you need to give other parts of your life more room to breathe, then do so with the confidence that your great work will wait for you.

Pile 5 - Flow (Turquoise)

4 of Wands, Hospitality

Have you been stuck with something for a while? There's a strong sense of a blockage that is being eroded away over time. This process can be sped up by allowing the ice to thaw a little more. "Break the ice." You may be wanting to open up and spend more quality time with other people but don't know how. Or you could be faced with meeting new people and being nervous about interacting with them. Even more so if they're roommates. A few people in this pile could be moving or have just moved. This is a chance to ease up and get to know new people.

This blockage could be a result of the past and of anxiety. The sound of a turning doorknob just jumpscared me as I typed the last sentence. You may benefit from learning about social anxiety and how to manage it. It's not an overnight job for you to fix this, though, but to just be aware of it and not allow it to get in the way of positive change in your life.

If you're struggling to figure out how to deal with meeting new people, I would suggest looking up videos or how-tos on social interaction, especially if a certain etiquette is required for an event. Learn about conversation starters and fun things you could do together like hosting a game night. Practice makes perfect, and over time the blockage will melt into the stream.

Pile 6 - Trust (Blue)

3 of Swords, Conversion

You have a very soft and tender outlook on life, which makes it all the more painful when reality doesn't conform to such a compassionate vision. It doesn't always try to respond to vulnerability in appropriate ways. Much of the time, this isn't from natural events as much as it stems from the ways in which people can treat one another cruelly. You've had some toxic people in your life who have put you through the wringer and attempted to squeeze every ounce of kindness they could from you. Making light of this pain to them only resulted in further deflection and antagonism on their part. The only outcome was to salvage whatever you could and pray for the best.

It is not your job to change their closed minded perspectives. They're on their own, here. Do not concern yourself with their messy inner world and lose any more of your energy. Also, do not attempt to regain what energy has been lost through bargaining either, as much as it hurts to press onward without looking back. You will recover, but you have to move on first and prioritize what you deeply care about most (you included).

There will come a time when your heart will be healed so you can see the brighter side of human connection again. All the beauty that your gentle soul is seeking is still there, shrouded by layers of protective petals that will one day bloom again and your life will truly flourish. For now, this is a time to give yourself all the comfort you can.

Pile 7 - Intuition (Violet)

XII Hanged Man, Spring

I get the feeling that you've been waiting quite a while for some good results to come in. This could either be from something that you started back in the spring, or are waiting to see results which may come around springtime. It is a season of flowers, so you may be waiting for this thing to blossom--that is, to be fully presentable to the public in some way. To have something to show for the time you put in. Like "hey, this is what I've been working on, this came from the seeds I planted." It could be growing in a direction unlike what you're used to, leaving you wondering how it could succeed in such unusual and burdensome conditions.

Lean on your inner guidance when it comes to the right timing. I don't believe that you're currently in a space where you need to push so hard for the best results. You can let things move at their own pace. Over tending to anything can end up in just as much trouble as neglect. There's only so much you can do before you have to let the flower do the growing and blooming for itself.

It's not always easy to sit in the place of uncertainty with the idea that doing more will provide more. But sometimes less is more. What you're creating is coming to fruition and may even turn out better than you expected. Trust in both the knowledge you've earned over time from learning lessons, as well as your natural intuition, to help you decide when it's time to take action.

Pile 8 - Love (Pink)

7 of Swords, Gossip

Let your heart lead the way here, not your worries over what others will think. Sure, you may end up with some people talking about you, but opportunities will keep passing by if you wait for everyone else to catch up to you. Leaning too much on everyone else's perspectives will only distort the vision you have for your own life journey. We all have unique journeys to go on, but unconditional kindness remains at the center of the Love card, the one thing that brings us together. Following life from a heart centered place may result in having others glance over and whisper, but that shouldn't distract you.

There is a rather delicate message here about dealing with friendships, colleagues, or possibly even family. You may have a tricky situation between several other people right now who have beef not with you but with each other. They may be coming to you to air their grievances and ask for advice.

If you care about both of these people, then it's best to approach this issue as diplomatically and impartially as possible and avoid feeding into the conflict. What would an enlightened mindset do in this situation? How would you want the other person to behave if they were in your shoes? Come from a place of pure compassion. They may choose to make amends or not, it's up to them. If their butting heads is bringing you down, it's always okay to step back and take a break. You are not responsible for what's going on in their heart, only your own, so protect yours well.

This reading has not been evaluated by the FDA to diagnose, prevent, treat, or cure any disease or infection. Please ask your physician before going online.

2024, @VitaminseeTarot ™