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remotewatch · 9 months ago

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no class, some integrity!

Jack Schlossberg x reader | 1.3k wc

Summary: All Jack wants is a round of golf, what a bore!

cw: shameless smut, fingering, outdoor recreation, sorry to the landscapers, and the ducks, unprotected sex, cum eating, if you want to safely reenact this get your ass up and VOTE, reader is on birth control but what’s a little plan b nausea for peace of mind, try to guess how serious I am about that, hate sex kinda sorta, this is a comedy

this one is for my oomf in editing! see you at the greek island queen out!

minors dni! get out! fuck off! shoo!

“Jack, fuck! Slow down!” Not because it hurts, but because he’s pounding you so hard he’s pushing you downhill, and any attempts you make to ground yourself against the grass just tear up the fresh sod in chunks. He’s bent and pressed flat against your back, panting whiny little “sorry-so sorry-I can’t, sorry-god”s into your ear as his hips piston uncontrollably.

You should’ve known better than to be all over him when you hadn’t seen each other in weeks; really, you should’ve expected this back when you selected your outfit.

-45 minutes earlier-

“Is that a skort?” You give him a half-glance over your shoulder from in front of the foyer mirror.

“No?” Jack leans back to peer under your hem in a way that only he can do without looking sleazy.

“You’re going to golf in a regular skirt?” God, he’s so simple, but you refrain from rolling your eyes.

“I didn’t pack anything else to go with this top. Does your course have a new dress code I’m not aware of?” With a practiced flick of your ponytail, you trot outside to the waiting golf cart before he can ask any more stupid questions.

As if Mother Nature herself means to mock you, the wind picks up as soon as he starts the engine. You spend the first few holes failing to hold your skirt down as Jack effortlessly outscores you, clearly not distracted enough to be beaten. If anything, the fluttering fabric is messing up your game as he watches from the drivers seat.

“If only someone would invent some sort of contraption with built in shorts, then you’d really be set.”

“Oh, fuck off!” he makes you miss your swing, sending the ball careening off to your left into a ditch. When you settle back into the cart, he’s wearing that mischievous little grin you hate to love.

“No, no, I’m serious. You should design one, bet it’d be a hit,” Alright, that’s enough of that. You swing your left thigh over his right, letting your skirt ride up enough to show off your underwear.

“Yeah, you’re always trying to get me to wear more clothes,” Jack suddenly appears very interested in the nearby duck pond despite the unmistakable tent in his chinos.

“We’re only on hole three, you know.”

“Ooh, the magic number!” He turns and squints into the sun, confirming you’re still very much in view of a security checkpoint, but you’re quick to stamp out his concerns.

“You’re seriously going to waste the one time we get the place to ourselves?” Another scoot and you’re practically sitting in his lap. “Or are you just worried about grass stains?”

“You’re ridiculous,” he mumbles, but he’s steering the cart out of sight nonetheless.

The second there’s a cluster of trees between you and the checkpoint, Jack is yanking your panties off hard enough to threaten rug burn. He’s grumbling all the way down to kneeling on the grass, like you’re asking him to repaint the whole property instead of rail you.

“You better spray all over these fucking seats if you want to act like this. I actually wanted to play today.” The leather squeaks as you slide fully onto his seat and place your feet on his shoulders. Your sneaker playfully nudges his cheekbone.

“That really depends more on you, you know.”

There’s a nearly imperceptible tic in Jack’s jaw, confirming you’ve pushed the right button.

For better or for worse, his hands simply don’t get tired. One presses on your pubic bone, pulling the skin just taught enough that every perfectly metronomic stroke on your clit sings through you uninhibited. He’s two knuckles deep and humming along to his own rhythm like an asshole, and maybe you’d say so if he wasn’t yanking your thoughts out with every hook of his fingers. Under any other circumstances, you might feel some type of way about the obscene squelching being the loudest sound on the course, but Jack has been gone for two weeks, and nothing in your toy box matches his fingers. He could make you sound like a foghorn without inspiring a lick of shame.

True to your word, the chair is utterly soaked, and Jack delights in the little bit that his fingers force out of you on each reentry. His tongue is snaking under you trying to clean every drop as it works its way up to your clit, but you more or less kick him to the ground before he can settle in.

“You still want to finish the game, right? We’ll be here all day if you keep playing with your food.” Jack tilts his head to one side like he’ll try and bicker back, but he elects to lunge for your waistband and drag you down with him instead. It would look fucking ridiculous if you were visible to anyone but the wildlife: both of you rolling around trying not to gain momentum and tumble downhill, kneeing each other and ripping up your cute little outfits like kids fighting for the remote. When you let your guard slip enough to fish his cock out of his pants, he takes the opportunity to pin you facedown to the turf and flood your nose with the smell of cut grass. You throw a weak elbow trying to flip him back over, but you’re no match for his years of paddle-boarding. A muttered “-can’t fuckin’ stand you-“ finds its way to your ear, and then he’s in and immediately slamming stars into your vision as your knees divot the green.

Jack always talks your ear off when you derail plans like this, complaining to the time of his thrusts in a way that nearly sounds convincing.

“We’ve never-completed-a whole-game! Never!” The breathiness of it deflates any sense of conviction from his words. Somehow you manage to crawl forward enough to get back onto your elbows, and it takes everything in you to keep your voice steady as you turn back to scowl at him.

“Get up and keep playing if you’re so upset.”

There’s that jaw twinge again. Before you can think to regret your words, he’s twisting one hand into your ponytail and pulling hard enough to make your grip slip.

He nearly knocks the breath out of you when he follows your collapse down to the ground, loose bits of grass sticking to both of your faces as he drools down your cheek. The new angle slots him even deeper, and the ducks resting by the pond’s edge actually fucking take off when they hear the moan he punches out of you. Despite it all, Jack is still a gentleman, one hand worming its way underneath you to paw frantically, sloppily at your clit. You’re driving him insane in the process of grinding down on his fingertips and bouncing off his pelvis in the little wiggle room you have, and soon he’s squeaking out little half syllables as his composure unravels. Any attempts at telling him to cum on your back are thwarted by your orgasm crashing through you and dragging his along with it. The way you’re twitching under him would be humiliating if he wasn’t matching you spasm for spasm. When he moves to scoot back, you grab a fistful of his ruined shirt and dig your nails into his oblique striations.

“Don’t even think about it. Clean that shit up, and then you’re driving us to CVS.” Jack snorts in annoyance, but he carefully pulls out to bend down and tuck in to his meal. The vibrations of him slurping his own cum out of you are almost overwhelming, but he switches to lapping you clean before you have to tap out. One last lip smack around your clit, and he’s leaning back on his heels to catch his breath. By now, the sun is just low enough to start stretching your shadows, and he looks nothing like the menace who just destroyed your outfit when he lies down facing you to pout about finishing up the game. You don’t bother to hide a giggle when you see how green his trousers are.

“That’s up to you. Do you feel more like changing or avoiding a speeding ticket?”

#this looney tunes ass smut omg #jack schlossberg #jack schlossberg x reader #wrap it up #don’t be like y/n be smart!!!!#idk anything about golf who cares he’s yummy #Spotify

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justbelievinginmagic · 1 month ago

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burrow - part 1

pairing(s): chan x hyunjin x reader (fyi, chan is only mentioned in this part!) warnings/tags: inspired by the escape mv! is it an abo au? is it a hybrid au? is it a werewolf au? idk lol but its something. lightly edited. mature topics, human experimentation, medicine (ivs/shots), trauma, implied abuse, medical imagery, blood, chains, restraints, fear, anxiety, on-the-run vibes, chan is called chris!, mentions of omega, beta, alpha terms, let me know if i need to tag anything else? word count: 1.2k -> next chapter (let me know if youd like more of this!! its kinda a vibe check?)

It had been a while since she’s seen him.

The mere sight of him made a waterfall of emotions clash through her, echoing that fateful night. Despite the humidity that clung to her skin in the present, a cold air filled her lungs like piercing icicles; the lingering smell of cheap rusted-metal on her skin was imprinted on her brain. Flashes of the facility’s clinical-lights going out one-by-one… the painful sting of an IVs’ needle scratching her insides as it was yanked from her skin. Their boney hands interlaced with hers. She remembered their reflective eyes, bright as the full moon above them, as they stared out at freedom for the first time – unrestricted.

He stared at her with those same eyes now; the faint tapetum lucidum was visible in the low-light of twilight. Their eyes met and, then, he’d look away. Always chasing, always running from her gaze. The flickering orange-bright streetlight flickered, painting his face in animalistic shadows. Hyunjin looked strangely the same, eerily so. Almost as if he traded one cage for another.

While her hair had grown out to a short style that tickled her neck, he had kept the buzzcut the facility gave all the experiments. His neck bore the remnants of the chains that had once wrapped around his torso, pinning him down to the medical bed when he was uncooperative. He wore them like a badge of honor, styled into a chain necklace now. It clinked melodically.

The handcuffs around her wrists felt suffocating; their metallic chill reminded her too much of their prison. How could he bear the metal around his throat? Why did he keep it? Her mind ran through her questions a mile a minute. Her own antsy eyes flashed from the gleam of the chain-links to his eyes once more.

There was an edge to the way he held himself, erratic, as he glanced this way and that. Shifting on his boot-clad feet. Forever on alert, forever ready to run. His wild eyes flashed back to her, taking in the restraints on her wrists with disdain. His snarl was silent; his bared teeth was more at his thoughts than her as he glanced aside once more. There was a long moment. She watched his chest shudder up and down, his head swiveling this way and that down the damp alley, before he was grasping her wrist and tugging her inside the false-security that was his hideaway.

It wasn’t like the burrow she had made for herself. It was all sharp and hard edges here. An old industrial warehouse that once houses inventory judging by the wire-shelves and racks that were upturned. A lone mattress, ratty and spilling feathers, sat in the corner with a fur-blanket - or was it a coat? - tossed haphazardly over it. A make-shift barrel fire kept the room warm and lit despite its heat unneeded with the ocean-side’s stickiness. She could see the few items that Hyunjin had scavenged. A supermarket cart filled with the remaining food and toiletries from his looting. Bandages, bottles of beer, ramen packets. A collection of baseball bats, crowbars, and chains was in a wire rack nearby. Sniffing the air, she smelt aging blood… their blood. And she could see the very chains she wore buried beneath the items. Along with his. Were they kept as reminders or simply because he was too nervous to abandon them somewhere?

The hideaway hadnt changed much since the last time she had been here. It worried her.

Hyunjin didn’t command her to sit or stay or to do anything, but YN paused beside the mattress, letting him walk further into his hide away. His back was to her when he spoke next.

“Did you get caught by them?” It was the first thing he said. His rumbling voice broke on the word ‘caught’ with a sort of squeaking sound. He cleared it with a cough.

“No.” she said. Not by them at least.

“You’re chained up,” he said glancing back at her. He held a backpack, his long fingers digging through it without even looking.

A leering smile split on his face, uncharacteristically cruel. It made a flash of fear crash through her before it settled heavy in her stomach. His smile was one he bit when angry. Bloodied teeth flashed through her mind; his blood-stained teeth. His small-fanged incisor teeth shimmered in the twilight. She wasn’t afraid of him. Never him. His smile faded, a momentary flash of fangs – perhaps unwittingly even.

“What did you get into?” he asked, slowly.

He walked back just as slow; each step loud and thudding. Calculated. There was a tightness in his lean muscles, a purpling under his eyes, the heaviness on his shoulders. When had he relaxed, she wondered? He looked like he need a long sleep, safe and sound. She doubted he felt safe here. The nearby crowbar by his bed said enough.

She remained quiet as she presented her wrists his way. Curled fingers nudged his chest. His hunting eyes remained tracked on hers for a moment longer before a large hand rose and captured hers in between his palm.

His hands were gentle as they grasped hers. Familiar fingertips brushed over her knuckles, over scars that hadnt faded, over injection sites. Chain-cutters broke her binds with a metallic snap. The cuffs fell to the floor loudly. She couldn’t help the jump that zinged through her form. Hyunjin kept her steady, holding tighter. Their eyes flashed to meet. His tongue swiped out over his plump lips. His thumb brushed over her bruised wrists, slowly. Almost sweet if the ache didn’t sting against her nerves.

“What happened, Omega?” he nudged again, leaning closer. His breath was hot against her cheeks; the smell of him, the ever-present honey-sweet rose was singed burnt by a fiery smoke. “Why did you come to me?”

“Don’t call me that,” she whispered softly – insistent, interrupting his question.

His blown-out irises focused on her, darkening, at the way her brow furrowed and she glared.

Omega. She hated that name. Omega, Beta, Alpha. It was missing the title Experiment before them, but it didn’t less the burn. She wasn’t Omega. She would never be that again.

“That’s not who I am, Hyunjin.”

Hyunjin softened at that. His forehead ghosted hers and he took a gentle breath in. His eyes shut and, when they opened, she swore something was different.

“I know, YN.” Hyunjin said gently, then. “YN.” He repeated her name in a way that made her skin prickle into gooseflesh. His fingers pressed against hers, tracing down her veins til his palm was kissing hers. Interlacing their hands for a moment, he squeezed. YN watched his throat jitter.

“YN… I-“

His head had snapped to the entryway. The makeshift-tin sheet door crinkled in the night air.

“No one’s following you?” he growled, his hand gripped hers tight. Nails dug crescent moons into her skin as he shifted to cover her.

“Not that I know of,” she said quietly. “I wouldn’t bring wolves to your door, Jinnie.”

His smile was bittersweet, biting like before. She couldn’t help the wave of sadness that crashed over her.

“You wouldn’t.” He agreed, his tone gruff. He glanced at her over his shoulder, stiff-boned once more. “Which brings me back to my question – why did you come to me… and not Chris?”

#bang chan x reader #stray kids x reader #stray kids imagines #hyunjin x reader #hwang hyunjin x reader #hyunchan x reader #chan x reader #written by haley

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astarioffsimpmain · 10 months ago

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astarion + console 💜

Hey, hon! Thank you so much for this prompt with Astarion!! I love a good hurt/comfort. 🥹 This one got a bit long and intense, so I'll go ahead and put a warning and pop it under a cut.

TW: choking (unintentional)

♡♡♡

He was trembling again. You laid awake in your tent that night, observing your lover who found himself in a fitful, restless trance for another night in a row. He had insisted that he was simply an active sleeper, and that it would be best to ignore his unconscious nonsense. However, with the way his lip trembled until he bit down on it with his sharp fangs, or the heart-wrenching sound of his whimpers and cries, you found yourself unable to leave him be.

Tentatively, you reached across to where he lay and stroked his hair gently. He murmured incoherently, then settled down. Emboldened, you laid the weight of your hand onto his cheek and carted your thumb across it gently. All was well until your nail slightly nicked his pointed ear on the way by, and, without warning, he sprang into action. Before you could even comprehend what was happening, you were pinned beneath him, his eyes wild and unfocused, and his hands wrapped tightly around your throat.

You coughed, panic rising in you. You pressed against his shoulders with your palms, hoping to push him away, but his strength was unmatched, and he only bore down harder on you. Your eyes bulged in your head as you tried to scream, clawing at his arms wildly. "S-Star!" You croaked quietly, hoping to snap him back to the present by using his nickname, but to no avail. The vision around the corners of your eyes began to blacken, and in a last ditch effort to stop him, you laid your palms flat against his cheeks and rubbed your thumbs gently across them.

All at once, the pressure on your throat ceased, and Astarion blinked, his eyes once again connecting him to what was around him. A flurry of coughs escaped your mouth, and your fingers immediately found the places on your throat on which would most certainly bruise by the morning. After several moments of gathering yourself, your eyes flicked to your lover, whose face was alight with horror.

"Star-"

"I thought- I thought you were-"

"I know, it's okay." Your voice was horse, and you cleared your throat a little before reaching out to him. But he wrenched himself away from you and curled up to the opposite wall in the tent.

"No!" He cried, staring down at your fingers as though they were daggers.

You retracted them and adjusted to face him. "You're safe, Star. You're with me, with our companions, and we will keep you safe."

"You're not safe." He muttered quietly, pulling his knees up to his chin. "You're not safe with me. I'm a monster." His voice was quiet, broken, and pained.

"I know who I chose to love, Star." You said softly in return. "You are no more a monster than I am. We've both done terrible things at the hand of someone else. But I'm not afraid; not of you, not of us, and not of our future."

He rested his head against his knees, and his expression softened ever so slightly; fear, apprehension, and possibly a flicker of something like hope. "I'll sit here and read for now." You said, leaning over to grasp the spine of your book. You didn't have to say the words. He understood that your statement was a silent invitation to stay as far away or get as close as he'd like; you'd be there for him no matter which he chose.

Several hours into the night, you peeked over the edge of your book to find a head of soft white curls tucked into your lap, his arms securely locked around your middle.

You smiled.

♡♡♡

No editing or revisions. We die like women with severe brainrot. 💕

#baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #astarion #astarion ancunin #astarion bg3 #astarion x reader #tw choking #tw: choking

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thoughts-and-gayers · 1 year ago

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no because the greater intergalactic community must have been SO confused when rick started carting morty around. like, the intergalactic terrorist known for having no morals and fucking everyone over is suddenly taking this random fucking human kid with him everywhere.

and at first, people are like, maybe the kid is a victim of some kind, like he was kidnapped or something, but nope! according to everyone who's interacted with the two of them together, he seems to be traveling with this known intergalactic terrorist (mostly) willingly!

and then, someone hears the kid call the rick sanchez "grandpa" and the intergalactic internet goes wild.

so people start trying to figure out how the hell rick fucking sanchez managed to get a grandson, and why the hell he's bringing said grandson along on his various errands and genocides. because this kid doesnt really come across as some crazy genius, or epic fighter, or anything like that! but one day, a story begins to spread starting from one of rick's former business partners.

see, this former business partner of rick's thought it would be a good idea to knowingly sell rick fake k-lax, and rick didnt react too kindly to it. but, as the story goes, just as rick goes to send a bullet right through the guy's skull, the kid stops him. he gets rick to stand down as long as the guy gives rick a refund. so this guy survives crossing rick sanchez because some human kid had some sort of sway over rick!

the kid's name gets leaked. it's morty.

so maybe some of rick's enemies decide kidnapping morty will be a good way to get sway over this intergalactic terrorist. and they lock morty up, sure, but theyre not that worried about using the most secure locks or hiding the guns or anything like that. after all, the kid's a pacifist, right?

then imagine their surprise when this human kid comes guns blazing out of the burning wreckage of their base, coated in the guards' blood, just in time to hop into rick's ship (which only just arrived) like its no big deal.

and people realize that this kid might be more of a threat than they thought.

and, eventually, morty smith's presence is almost as intimidating and panic-inducing as the presence of rick sanchez.

and people on space tumblr edit flower crowns onto pictures of morty that they stole from news websites.

#rick and morty #morty smith #rick sanchez #morty #r&m

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steviebbboi · 8 months ago

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Hi! Me again 😅 I have another request for Good For It Ari ❤️ Was wondering if you could do a proposal/marriage moment between them too? Wondering if there would be any angst/push back from the town at all/or like how’s the town feeling about now later down the road? Do they still like them or not? Thanks again ❤️

Hi hi again~ thank you for sending this in <3 i love this prompt too! it definitely made me think hard about how Lumberjack!Ari would propose given that his language is comprised of well-placed, intentioned grunts lol but i hope that i did it justice.

Pairing: Lumberjack!Recluse!Ari x F!Reader (Good For It)

Word Count: 1.6k~

Summary: How would Lumberjack!Ari propose to you?

You could read the original fic here.

Disclaimer: ***I don't give any permission for this to be reposted anywhere! Pls do not steal work, plagiarism isn't demureeee***

Reblogs help writers reach more readers who may also enjoy our work. As you like, kindly reblog~ <3

Warnings/Triggers: explicit detailed depiction of smut in a memory, lovie dovie softness, protective and mild possessive Ari showin’ up to wreck you. this isn't beta read, and most likely will read it over again to edit but wanted to put it out for ya'll to enjoy!

The cart wheels rattled along the road pavement as you walked into the store. You could feel some of the speculative stares already as you perused the vegetable aisle.

Looking at some of the fresh veggie options, you could feel your heart thundering heavily and could feel the heat start to envelop your body underneath your clammy palms. Instinctively, you inhaled deeply to alleviate the tension building in your shoulders when you also start to hear the whispers.

You were staring way too long as two identical pieces of squash when you felt the relief come in, “Should I give you three a moment alone?”

Broken out of your dissociative gaze, you scoffed out a laugh while you turned and looked up to find Ari smirking at you. His frame towered over your significantly smaller one as your narrowed eyes met his affectionate glint. “No, you brute– we have concluded our meeting, thank you very much.” You teased back at him with a mocking smile.

Ari only chuckled and put his burly hands on both of your shoulders and squeezed lightly. You could feel the tension slightly leave your body at his touch as you put your best pick of squash in the cart.

Ari did his best to cheer you up whenever the both of you were out together. Even in the most mundane tasks, people seemed to still enjoy torturing you with their prying stares and gossiped whispers. Even though it's been two whole years since you started dating Ari, people still seemed to carry their weighted opinions about your relationship.

The guilt that Ari carried for what happened at the mill has dissipated throughout the years– his feelings no longer diminishing your relationship together as you both worked it out a year ago. You tried to remind yourself that other people had no say or merit in the security of your relationship together. In all honesty, their judging natures have only helped you both grow closer together, never doubting each other’s feelings for the other.

Classically, Ari’s protective nature only grew the more that he noticed the town’s critical disposition towards you in particular. He didn’t much care about their opinions of him, but when it came to you, he felt a heightened sense of defensiveness.

You carried a light in his world that was unfamiliar to his own–he knew the significance of your presence in his life, he felt better and just good with you in his life. He would happily follow you to the depths of any sense of darkness. He understood that your sensitive nature has taken others’ criticisms more personally, but he also knew that he would never let anything come too close, or at least, close enough to jeopardize your relationship.

You were a softness to protect, he cherished you, and utterly adored you. Ari would do anything to preserve that with you and in your shared life together.

Not ignorant to the glances that people were extending towards your direction, he used his commanding physique to his advantage to narrow his gaze directly at those who were brave enough to send stares in the first place. Once they noticed his directive blaze, people would flush and scurry their grocery carts away in a masked hurry.

Satisfied, Ari turned back to you and put an arm over your shoulder casually while placing a kiss on your hairline as you looked at him curiously. “Now, what’s next?”

Surprise bloomed in your thoughts as you noticed that the further you walked into the store, people seemed to deviate their intrusive stares away from you and Ari. Either you were getting good at avoiding them, or you were missing some sudden piece of information.

Your thoughts were curious as you glanced over at Ari from the passenger seat. The breeze from the open windows graced soft wind through his locks, he looked so effortlessly relaxed and handsome.

Eyes still pensive, you couldn’t help the small smile that grew upon your lips.

Ari sensed your stare as he took a glance over at you before looking back at the road. Catching the inquiring glint in your eyes, he glanced back at you, “Everything okay, baby?”

Humming out an affirmative yes, you said simply, “You’re pretty.” A full smile graced your face at his typical responding grunt.

You didn’t forget your earlier thoughts though and continued, “And you’re sneaky.”

Ari released his own slow hum this time that you quickly mimicked. “I don’t know what happened, but something did.”

He didn’t say anything even though you made your speculative tone obvious. He only gave you a soft smile and merely took his right hand off the wheel to extend an open palm. You narrowed your eyes at him again but took his invitation and put your hand in his. Once your palm met his, he gave you a gentle tug to pull you closer to him and you tucked yourself all small underneath his arm while resting your head on his shoulder. Ari’s calloused fingers stroked your exposed skin on your arm intimately while you both sat in silence the rest of the drive home.

You knew how Ari oriented himself to shield you from the nosy outsiders scrutinizing your relationship. While you liked to think that you could handle it all on your own, you secretly enjoyed it when Ari protected you like this. There was just something about his guardedness that made you feel worshipped and cared for– on the flip side, it was also assertive and dominating. It was definitely dangerous, but that's what made him so alluring and even more attractive in your eyes.

Something told you that Ari knew that too. Your mind suddenly flashed back to last night– the room barely lit by the moonlight shining exposed through the curtain. Your legs bent over Ari’s broad shoulders which forced your legs open wider to accommodate for his weighted stature as he held you down for his gluttonous tongue that lapped and sucked at your soaking wet pussy eagerly, over and over again until you felt the day’s stress leave your body with each mind-numbing orgasm that he gave you.

You cleared your throat as you felt your breathing shift momentarily, your body instinctively reacting to the memory as you fidget closer to him. It was like he knew what you were thinking as he released what sounded like a knowing hum at your movement and kissed your temple tenderly.

Finally reaching your shared house, you giggled as Ari took most of the grocery bags from the back of the car and ducked his head as he entered. The rest of the evening was spent cooking dinner together, a favorite pastime that the both of you loved to do.

It was later when you were resting on the couch, both of you stretched out leisurely. You were unwinding from the day, already in your night clothes (you in your camisole and underwear and Ari wearing only sweatpants as you bullied him into being shirtless for the remainder of the night). Your legs entangled together with your head resting on Ari’s naked chest while he held you closer on top of him. He had one long arm wrapped around your waist while his other hand stroked and played with the back of your hair lazily. A calming and grounding feeling overtook your body at the sensation. Your favorite movie was on, but with Ari’s soothing touch and his soft heartbeat thudding underneath your ear, you could feel your eyelids getting heavier.

A frown settled on your face when you felt a sudden weight and cooling feeling on your hand that was resting on Ari’s shoulder. Your sleepy eyes glanced up towards the limb and widened.

There, resting on your left hand on your ring finger, was a simple silver band with a round stone just glimmering at you with how it shined underneath the warm light from the living room lamp.

Not really registering what you were looking at, you rose up from your lazed position on Ari’s chest suddenly to pull your hand closer to your face. Almost as if you couldn’t get closer to it, you inspected the jewelry on your hand as if it was magic. Your shocked eyes met Ari’s equally sleepy and rested gaze as he took in your reaction humoredly.

“Ari…what–,” you started with awe in your voice. Ari took your left hand away from your stunned face to bring it to his soft lips. Your breath hitched as he kissed the ring on your finger solidly.

“From the first day that I met you, I knew that I wanted you. To this day, even though I already have you, I still want you. But, I also need you.” Your eyes glittered with tears at listening to his affection-coated words. He would never really admit it, but his blue eyes also glittered with his own.

“I love you. And, I think that you may need me too,” his deep-toned voice was rasp with desire as he continued, “if you’ll have me.” He placed another sincerely soft kiss on your ring finger and continued placing kisses up all over the inside of your wrist.

His other hand wiped at the tear that fell and you grabbed his large hand before he could pull it away. There were so many things that you wanted to say but your voice locked in your throat. You took his large hand in your own to kiss his own ring finger softly with a whispered “yes.”

Ari’s mouth opened with his own gasp at the feeling of your plush lips on his skin. Hearing your tender response, Ari allowed his own gentle smile to grace his content faced expression as he pulled you down to clutch you desperately close to him. Pressing soft kisses on each other’s exposed skin periodically, you held each other for some time, your newly sparkled hand intertwined with his.

A/N: AHHHH, their softness really just kills me. And the NEED argh, i wrote it and also dyin' from the sweetness of this drabble. pls let me know your thoughts, they are so welcome. <3 hope you enjoyed!

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#ari levinson imagine #ari levinson x female reader #ari levinson fanfiction #ari levinson x reader #ari levinson smut #fic recommend #ari levinson x you #chris evans fanfiction

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aria-bun · 5 months ago

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It's the light, it's the obstacle that casts it

In which Corvus fails at trying not to think about things. Co-written and edited by the lovely lovely @sorinethemastermind I write the Corvus POV's, they write the Soren POVs. Also on Ao3 and it has a playlist!

Corvus knew it was going to take a while for him to unpack the bombshell of information that Soren had told him the day before. Lucky for him, he could do that while helping pack up the large camp.

King Ezran’s plan was to relocate the camp to the Banther Lodge, to make help more accessible and so there was more space for everyone.

It was a good idea, but it was just a very long journey for all the supplies they had to transport.

Corvus spent most of the morning taking down tents and helping move things into whatever wagons that were able to be salvaged.

Soren is an elf.

Half-elf, part of his mind corrected him. Soren is a half-elf.

He wasn’t sure what he was going to do with this information, if anything at all. It didn’t change anything. Not to him, at least. He was still Soren. His best friend.

Nothing was ever going to change that.

Once everything was secured, Corvus, as well as several other members of the guard, mounted the horses pulling the carts of supplies, and at midday, what was left of Katolis started its trek to the Banther lodge.

One of the carts also had Runaan in it, his wrists tied to one of the posts, and he was surrounded by stacks of linen used for the tents. It looked quite amusing.

Some smaller kids hitched rides on the carts as well throughout the journey, sitting on top of wooden crates and more stacks of cloth.

Keeping on the path, they were able to make it to the Banther lodge just after sunset, which left them setting up hundreds of tents in the dark. Everyone who was in the medical tent before got transferred into the lodge, as well as Runaan, being kept in a separate room with two guards posted outside of the door,

Corvus didn’t know what King Ezran was going to do about Runaan. Keep him locked in there forever? Execute him? Let him go?

Probably not the last one, he thought to himself as he helped finish setting up another tent, which he seemed to be getting better and better at.

Corvus glanced around at the multitudes of other tents being set up.

He wasn’t going to be getting any sleep tonight. He doubted he would’ve even if they didn’t have to set up the rest of the camp overnight. There was too much on his mind.

What was the next step after this?

How are we going to rebuild?

Where were they going to rebuild?

All the thoughts of what could come next were jumbled in his head, making it hard to think properly.

“Hey, Corvus!” He turned his head to look at who shouted for him. It was Jayce, one of the other guards.

“Yeah?” He raised an eyebrow at him.

“You’re on perimeter watch in two hours.”

Corvus blew out a light breath. “Alright.”

He was definitely not sleeping tonight.

#its quicker and easier to eat your young fic #soren tdp #corvus tdp #halfelf!soren #sorvus fic #soren fic #corvus fic #tdp fanfic

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wetandtiny · 11 months ago

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Under pressure

Approximately 2.3k words

*my boyfriend helped me write the last half (even tho i edited it a lot after) tell me if you like it, that way i can give him some feedback on his work.

Intro

You were in a friendship/platonic relationship with Alastor, you heard rumors about him saying he's not interested in sex or relationships but couldn't leave your feelings away for him. You did all kinds of services (non-sexual) for him, in exchange for his protection, it was a simple deal you made with him couple months ago. Your deal made him aware when you were in a panicked state. Very easy on his side since you didn't like trouble, most of the trouble came from the fact that you seemed close to him, and his enemies (mostly vox) wanted to take advantage of that.

tags

minors DNI 18+ only

#hazbin hotel #alastorxreader #genderneutralreader #forcedproximity #repressedthirst #smut #nonsexrepulsedalastor #petnames #patronisingalastor #subalastor #receivingalastor #bite #needyreader #handworship #mouthaction #jokesonyou

Minutes ago, you were running away from some vox security bot who had been repurposed for other tasks, you turned a corner missing one of their grappling hooks going for your shoulder. You ended up setting yourself up in a dead end. One of the bot grappled your leg, you fell on your butt as it yanked you pretty hard. Multiple of them came crawling and flying their way to you as you tried to free your leg from the hook. As you unhooked it a flying drone dropped a net on you. You were all tangled up as you were trying to push back the other bots from tying you down. Panic started to rise inside you, your breath getting faster, you didn't want to cause any trouble to Alastor, but you knew it was in vain as he could feel your panic from miles away. You heard a bot break in front of you powering down as it was squished on the floor.

-Sorry my dear, it took me some time to get here. I see you are in quite a predicament, let me help you. He said while destroying more of the bots and drones mostly with his tentacles.

Alastor could have just teleported you both to a safe place, but enjoying the trill of killing stuff for free would have been a waste (Even though it was not actually living). You freed yourself from the annoying net, after a couple minutes later most the bots were disabled.

-Now that wasn't much of a problem, was it?

Instant guilt built up inside your brain.

-I'm sorry Al, I should have been able to take care of it by myself, I didn't want to disturb you in your work. I know you have so much to do for the hotel and everything. As you said that one of his eye twitched in annoyance, then his ears rotated to hear behind him. Another swarm of bots was coming, now that Alastor was here, surely vox would send most of them out, including the attack bots, knowing he could get his hands on the radio demon. You looked behind him seeing all the red dots of their cameras starting to light up the alleyway.

He sighed with annoyance.

-I did have other plans for this evening.

You didn't want to annoy him any further, so you thought maybe if we got out of sight of the cameras, he could teleport us somewhere else. You took his hand and ran to the backdoor of the building on the side of the dark dead end you were in. Door was locked, but you made quick work of hit smashing it with your heel. You got inside the building quickly, closing the door best you could behind both of you. You were in a pitch-black back store full of boxes and utility carts that you saw slightly before the door closed completely. The only thing you could see in the dark of the room was Alastor's red piercing eyes.

"Alastor, do you think you could teleport us somewhere safer?" You asked him.

"What's the magic word?" He said with his eyes on you.

"Al! We don't have time for this, come on!" you started getting annoyed yourself.

"Then, no I won't" he said giggling as he closed his eyes. Now you couldn't see anything, you were left stranded in a place you didn't know, scared as fuck. You could hear the clickety of the robots outside walking to the now unlocked door of the building.

"Damn it Al... Fine... Please radio demon sir, could you please move us somewhere safer."

"Well yes dear." He responded with his smirking face lighting up directly in front of yours. Surprised, you lost your footing, your butt heading for the floor, but he interrupted your fall lifting you up by the waist holding you against him, you felt like you were falling for a second time due to the teleportation, his legs folded up, knees now resting on your upper back, your hips now against his. You tried getting up as you found footing again, your head hitting the now weirdly low ceiling with a loud pang.

-Ouch!

-You should stay sitting and quiet, love, if you don't want them to find us.

You could see his stupid smirk lighting up the small, enclosed space you were stuck in. You were so much more annoyed now, how the fuck was this his reasoning, teleporting to the hotel or literally anywhere else would have been 1000 times better than being stuck in a small space with your body against his, his breath down your face, red eyes looking directly into yours, your hands with nowhere to go but his chest and his hands resting on your back. Oh no! Shit! Don't think about that NOW. Stupid body reacting to sudden physical contact. Contact that was missing all sooo much inside of you since the start of this dumb deal with him. Robot attack! right that's the right thing to think about. Get your mind in the right place. Damn it.

-WHAT THE FUCK! Al where are we? Did you fucking hide us in a fucking cupboard or some shit? What are you thinking, how is this any better than being outside-

As you were spouting nonsense his eyes tensed up, you felt one of his hand leave your back and press over your mouth ‘Sssshhh’ urging you to stop making noises. More physical contact! Shit! It did indeed stop you from complaining even more *gulp*, few seconds after, you heard the door of the building opening and the little sound of the bots’ legs hitting the floor.

His hand was covering the bottom half of your face, the fingers and palm of said hand reaching both of your ears easily. Taking some small breath, the air you expulsed tumbled down the both of you. The softness of his hand on your lips, you had a really hard time suppressing your intrusive thoughts. God you just wanted to kiss and lick his hand, sooo much! Your mind was entirely focused on not doing that. You closed your eyes as your breath became more and more short and fast. You couldn't register the fact that you were becoming putty in his arms, your body slouching into him, your back hitting his folded legs behind you, knees coming in contact with the surface you were on, your hips sinking into his. You had to suppress noises as your mind caught up with how your body just melted into his and the fact that your clothed crotch was now in contact with his.

His eyes relaxed a bit, removing his hand slowly from your face, you felt a string of saliva down your chin, most likely connected to his hand. Your breath now big inhales coming from your mouth, you cursed the fact that the only thing you could see was his eyes and mouth. You tried grabbing his hand as you lost your self-control, reaching forward, your fingers only found his chest, you started trailing your way, patting his chest, shoulder, and upper arms. You saw his stare question you as you were touching him unprompted. But you, as much as him, knew that the situation he put you both in was a double-edged sword. You feigned indifference as his eyes were on you, you looked where your hands were travelling, even though you couldn't see at all. You reached his hand on his knee behind you, moving slowly to make sure you were not making any noise. You slid your fingers under his, interlocking them, your fingers spreading almost painfully as his hand was so much bigger than yours. You moved his hand ever so slowly back to your mouth. You could feel your heartbeat in your ears as it followed the boldness of your moves.

You had never made any move to show your desires to the radio demon, always been a good little platonic partner even though you wished for more.

But he chose to mess with you so that was on him, he could very well teleport the both of you somewhere else anytime he wished, so you'll continue your scheming as long as he would keep his shit up.

As his hand reached your face you took it with both of your hands opening all of his fingers around your face, hiding behind it, his surprised stare disappearing behind it as your tongue slipped out of your mouth to crash against his wide palm. He had a surprised tremor and you feared immediate rejection, but he didn't pull his hand from your face or make any move to change anything. You started licking his palm wholeheartedly pouring your soul into the motion, conveying your long-repressed needs, your whole mouth moving into action, lips sucking the skin slowly, kissing it softly, mouth silently slurping at his palm, salivating at the texture of his skin directly on your tongue, the salty sweat of his hand in your tastebuds. Going up toward his fingers, scared of looking at his face, you closed your eyes. Tongue licking the webbing in between his digits, you heard a silent gasp from him, as your tongue slid in and out between his fingers. You could feel his loud exhales tickling your eyelashes, you were covering his hand with saliva. Then you felt his other hand move off your back, heard his claws scraping the "floor" where you were sitting, coming to wrap around your ankle, his touch whispering up your leg, squeezing periodically, his speed matching the one you were using to lick between his fingers. Hand reaching your knee, you stopped licking, panic gathering a bit in your stomach, anticipating for him to move further up. He stopped his hand at the same time as you, kind of like saying that if you wanted more you would have to show him by your actions.

It was a scary situation, was this a threat? Or maybe he needed some clarifications. Knowing him, it could be both, but the time you two shared did give you enough courage to get you so far, so without fully processing what your next move would lead to, you tenderly, pressed your teeth in the fleshy part of his palm under his thumb, nibbling with different pressures. He let out the faintest and only whelp you’ve ever heard coming out of that mouth. You slightly pulled away, both of you looking taken aback. Rarely does a reaction manage to breakthrough and escape his unwavering smile, and never in a million years would you have thought it would be in this context. Your heart was racing like it was fueled by hell’s fire itself, pressing you to continue in that tortuous road. The fog in your head seemed to clear with the vocal reaction he made, he wants this too! Maybe even, he needs this as much as you do. But this was not the only effect the noise you could hear, outside the little bots were coming closer to the, you assumed ‘’cabinet’’. You exhaled the breath you were holding, now inspired by this realization, once again you brought his hand back to your mouth, you glided your nimble tongue on the bite mark you’ve left, then up his thumb, wrapping the best you could, the softness of your tongue around the flat of his thumb. His head slightly tilted backwards, eyes closed, grinning ajar. His breaths becoming more and more panting. His body was sieged by shivers, stirring his core. Poor Al… You thought to yourself, all this time being touch deprived. Even if he would never admit it out loud, his body betrayed him in the most obvious ways possible. A growing hardness where your bodies where resting against one another, filled you with lust. Who knew a devil’s heart like his could pump this much blood, from such simple touches. You took the whole tip of his finger in your warm mouth, firmly closing your lips on it while using your tongue like you would while sucking a cock. Alastor’s reaction was immediate, his free hand let go of you and he reached for a support point in the chokingly small space, his claw, scraping the ‘’wall’’ next to you, his whole-body becoming tense at your action. His hips turned his shivers into a rhythmic flexing of his pelvis. The continuous panting and the jitter of his movements rattling the cupboard you were stuck in, making it obvious to the bots that you were hiding in there.

You took another bite, his thumb still in your mouth and in a muffled voice you said ‘Sssshhh’, now urging him to stop making noises. His eyes jolting wide open as if he just realized that he’s being toyed with. You rotated your hips, getting a better angle in which you could move. You heard him gasp as you pushed his waist down to the floor by rubbing yourself down on his core. You felt the struggle of his hardening dick in his pants. Then you pulled out his thumb from your mouth, a sliver of saliva still hanging from his hand to your mouth. Red light could be seen through the door of the cabinets illuminating slightly the space. You leaned closer to his face, your lips brushing his cheek, reaching his ear, hushing this silky threat. -Why don’t you be a dear and teleport us somewhere safe?... unless… you want me to stop?

Dividers and banners made by me, please tag me if you use them.

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w1ld-wr1t3r · 1 month ago

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Fanfic Writers: Director’s Cut

Not an au but i would like to hear about the norrix outsider pov ❤️ and for an au peanut the paddock puppy? ❤️

Ah, two good ones!

Norrix Outsider POV collection

For those not familiar, this collection focuses on Norrix through the eyes of others, specifically how long it takes for some people to figure out they're together (some figure it out quickly, others have to be explicitly told). It's mainly an excuse for me to write everyone being happy about Norrix.

I'm gonna be totally honest, I haven't actually touched the Outsider POV collection in a couple of months. 😅 But I definitely plan to continue it! I started the Zak installment a while back but got kind of stuck and didn't get very far, so I think I'm gonna start over with a new idea (I'm still keeping the idea of Zak being like "whoa I had no idea about this," and Andrea being like "what on earth do you mean you hadn't figured it out already??"). I also got a great idea from an anon for the Carlos installment, thank you again anon! I will definitely be using it.

As of now, this is my current list of planned chapters (in no particular order):

Max V. (completed!)

Zak (WIP)

Andrea

Carlos (Need to start)

Oscar

Max F.

Daniel

George

Alex

Charles

Louis van Baar (someone suggested doing one of Martijn's friends, which is a great idea!)

Someone else in Martijn's circle of friends/coworkers (maybe Arijit Singh, because there's no way Angels For Each Other and Weightless weren't written for Lando)

Someone from the McLaren garage (maybe Kyle idk)

Jon

Family members (on both sides)

Other members of the grid

Whoever else I can think of LOL

If anyone has ideas for more characters to add or ideas for installments I haven't started yet, feel free to share them! I have ideas for some but most still need ideas.

The Adventures of Peanut the Paddock Pup

The next installment of this series, Peanut's first day at the MTC, is coming along slowly but surely! I think there's a couple scenes I need to either edit or remove to get the story un-stuck, but it's still cooking nicely. Peanut gets to meet Zak and Andrea, the garage crew, and Oscar, and then, when Lando gets stressed after a frustrating sim session, he snuggles with him to make him feel better. He takes his job as Lando's best friend very seriously!

As I've said before, this series is going to be 90% fluff, but not everything is sunshine and rainbows. I've teased the fic where Peanut stops a saboteur a couple of times. I'm not sure how likely it would really be for someone to be able to sneak into the garage and get close enough to mess with the cars in the middle of a race weekend, but I'm sure there are ways if someone is really really determined, so bear with me for now. A quick teaser of the fic: on a rainy qualifying day at Spa, Peanut is chilling inside the garage when all of a sudden, he spots someone he doesn't recognize. The person does something to Oscar's car (messing with the brakes) but Peanut stops him before he can get to Lando's. The man is carted away by security while the mechanics try to fix what he did to Oscar's car so he can get out for quali. In the meantime, Lando praises Peanut for being a good boy who spotted danger and reacted to protect them, and Oscar gives him a very big and grateful hug for quite possibly saving his life.

On a fluffier note, other planned installments include Peanut's first day in the paddock, meeting other paddock dogs like Roscoe and Leo, a Norrix vacation to Finland from his POV, Norrix coming out from his POV, and maybe even a version of the events of (Puppy) Love At First Sight written from Peanut's POV! There may also be a story where Oscar gets a dog too and Peanut becomes friends with them, but I can't decide what kind of dog Oscar should get yet so that one's only a maybe. There are a couple other less-than-fluffy fics planned too, namely one where Martijn has a health scare but Peanut senses it before either of his humans do, and ends up saving Martijn a lot of suffering and woe because of it. And there's one more fic currently on my list too, but that's one that I don't want to spoil yet! For now all I'll say is that Peanut is a very good and heroic boy in that one.

There might be other miscellaneous fluffy blurbs with Peanut. This is one of my favorite AUs to write moments of random fluff in. So if you're ever craving some puppy fluff, I'll always be more than happy to write some!

#norrix outsider pov collection #the adventures of peanut the paddock pup #lando norris #martin garrix #norrix #f1 rpf #ask

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zeldamomoe · 2 years ago

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We survived the Orlando NieR concert hunger games and came out attacked for sure, but satisfied with our mezzanine seats. As much as I'd love to meet Yoko Taro, since I've loved this series with all my heart since I played the PS3 version of NIER in 2015ニーアゲシュタルト, VIP is just not in the cards at the moment. I'll keep an eye on the site, but I had one in my cart that someone put back earlier on the day of public ticket sales, and then it slipped through my fingers so fast 😭 But who are we seeing there in March??!! I am scared to fly for the first time post-pandemic, especially to FLORIDA 💀 but my friends were like let's go! and we were already planning a trip there, and it's the best concert date, timing wise for work for me. So I couldn't say no lmao. Thank you @shrubbyprincess for securing our tickets! I just ordered a new human Emil cos too because I am outgrowing this beautiful suit that Caroline Krunchy made me a tad bit (Lady Zero and FinalFlick Videos were there first hand to see the pants rip even and that was in 2017 the same year it was made lmao; I blame myself for giving bad measurements) 🤣

📸 my partner Raph, edits by me Emil sash & suit made by @carolinekrunchy Emil staff made by ZomNom Studios Bro Nier is @shrubbyprincess Bro Nier cosplay made by Harv Cosplay Weiss made by Mecchan-chan

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dbarn · 9 months ago

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Lithograph reportedly available at D23:

Separate pictures attached below in case the link doesn't work.

There's a lot going on here.

Some familiar characters -- Check out Clawhauser's off-duty look! Yax and Flash (naturally) bringing up the rear! The Hopps family is represented! -- as well as new ones, including a very prominent role to a big, blue snake. (A possible antagonist? Hard to tell with reptiles. Looks like he's smiling, though.)

Is that Finnick in the stroller, wearing a bunny onesie? And holding... uh... we'll just assume that's a carrot-shaped pacifier for now.

Oh! And don't forget the food cart near the top -- what looks like a reference to Bug-Burga, often seen in fanfic but not mentioned in the first movie.

Some closeups follow.

Chief Bogo and what could be a member of the TUSK team (or maybe just a boar in tactical gear).

Looks like there's a chameleon in a Men in Black-style outfit hitching a ride on Bogo's arm. EDIT: wait, I just got it! Chameleons are providing security for the Zootennial parade because they'd be great at covert operations!

There's also a seal, a beaver, a bear on a unicycle... okay, maybe that'll make sense in time.

What looks like:

One of Mr. Big's polar bear bodyguards (Koslov? Kevin? Raymond?)

A lot of wildebeests(?) forming a parade for the "Zootennial"

Gazelle being held aloft by her tiger dancers

The walrus plumber from the diorama

A cat on a motorcycle... huh. Too early to draw conclusions yet, but I'm kind of hoping that's a regular domestic cat, which hasn't been seen in any canonical stuff so far that I'm aware of.

And, of course, Nick and Judy in their new outfits, driving... a hog rod. (I wonder if Nick even has a driver's license -- Judy was driving the cruiser at the end of Zootopia too.)

#zootopia #zootopia 2 #d23 expo

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the-hilda-librarians-wife · 1 year ago

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Sketchbook Week Day 4 - Dreaming of Bumping Into You (Chapter 1)

Summary: When Johanna is woken up in the middle of the night by a strange phone call, she knows she has to ask Kaisa what is happening. She just doesn’t know which is more concerning; whether it’s the words being said or the way her best friend sounds while she’s delivering them

Notes: Written for @sketchbookweek Day 4 - Secrets

Cw: mentions of drug/alcohol use. Nobody actually uses either, they’re just fucking stupid

Listen, with the amount of songs I make sketchbook edits to in my head, I have no idea why I decided to write fanfic inspired by Why’d You Only Call Me When You’re High, but when the inspiration strikes you can’t argue with it yk

Read it on ao3

“Arch sorceress Pilqvist is a disloyal, unreasonable woman. It is beyond me how she has reached such a high standing inside our order when her skull is so thick I hardly think hurling a crystal ball at it would even hurt!”

Kaisa took a deep breath. The very woman who was being slandered right in front of her had taught her that filling your lungs with air was the best thing you could do when you wanted to lash out. Not that it made the anger go away, not at all. But at least it made it so one couldn't get any impulsive words out, at least not until after one big exhale. After which you could always inhale again and stop yourself from getting cursed, punched, fired, or in her current case, probably all at once.

“Tell me again how you think insulting my mentor is going to make me help you, Ingrid.”

Her voice had been calm. Slow. The appropriate tone for a library, which, even though her boss seemed to have forgotten, they were inside at the moment. Yet the witch immediately looked angry, the red that had been steadily rising on her neck reaching her sharp cheekbones.

“You must!” She shot, glaring at how Kaisa kept her demeanour purposefully disinterested, eyelids heavy and shoulders slumped over the library cart she was walking around with for reshelving purposes. Ingrid didn’t quite like how the librarian made her follow around while she did her duty either, but that was their bad for only hiring one person for that entire building. “Matilda is the only witch who ever managed to create a spell like that with so little side effects. With the amount of trolls walking around town these days, we need it more than ever! Witchkind’s safety is at stake!”

The librarian rolled her eyes, though she didn’t think the other witch saw it. Recent… changes brought to the town by Frida and her friends had made it increasingly easy to tell apart the bigoted ones amongst them all. No matter how little interest trolls seemed to have on witchcraft and its practitioners, there were still some witches who insisted that just because their magics didn’t mix, that they shouldn’t coexist.

Which was just as bullshit as it sounded.

The Committee had called upon Tildy one day, and she’d even showed up much to everyone’s surprise. They’d explained their worries, which meant that five minutes in it wasn’t a meeting anymore, but a sass session for the older woman to make them realise how stupid they sounded. They didn’t, of course, which only meant Tildy refused to give them her prized protection spell and they didn’t give up on their quest to secure it. Leaving Kaisa in her current position.

“It’s her spell.” Kaisa said as she parked her cart between two shelves and began looking for the correct place for an eighteenth century poetry book. Her opinions on the matter were exactly like her former master’s, of course. She hadn’t witnessed Hilda show off her shifting powers like a party trick when she dined at her house just to turn around and say that trolls were dangerous. But if Tildy hadn’t come through to them, great at turning people to her side as she was, then Kaisa wasn’t going to be the one to make them see the other side of things. Besides, she was tired. The last thing she wanted was to begin a moral argument in the final leg of her already tiring work day.

There was also the issue that she didn’t actually know that spell, but hey, she didn’t need to admit that to the people that employed her, did she?

“I’m not going to spill it if she didn’t want you to have it. I’m sorry, but you’ll have to look somewhere else.” She finished, not sorry in the least but trying to keep some semblance of politeness.

Ingrid twisted her lips like she’d tasted something sour. The truth, probably. Or her own stupidity. She ran a hand through her short blonde hair to make it fall back into place.

“Hm. Lineage secret, is it?”

Nah. It was a protection spell. Tildy would probably give it to anyone who asked her nicely, if they didn’t want it for idiotic and prejudiced reasons. She’d likely made Kaisa learn it at some point, but gods knew she’d long since forgotten it.

“Yes.” She lied. “Of the utmost secrecy.”

Ingrid hummed again, and Kaisa thought she got a chill in her spine when she did so. It got draughty in the library during that time of the day, she supposed. “I see.” She said in a whisper. “I suppose I’ll just have to find it… someplace else.”

The other woman walked away, all of Kaisa’s discomfort disappearing alongside her. She breathed a sigh of relief at no longer having Ingrid’s analysing stare locked on her face like it had been for the entire conversation, finally free to listen to her songs as she worked.

For some reason, though, she still felt eyes on her all the while until she finished for the day. No matter how many times she looked behind herself, she still saw nothing, so she figured it must be the lingering unease at having been so close to one of the Committee’s most unpleasant witches (she and her sister were almost tied in Kaisa’s listing, but Abigail still took the crown for that whole Void business). Kaisa let the music blast through her headphones, getting lost in it as an antidote for those moments of stress and whispering along to the lyrics.

”The mirror’s image tells me it’s home time…”

…......

A couple years before, when Hilda (whose name she did not know at the time, of course, but a blue haired girl is hard to miss even at such a large library) began showing up to ask for books and advice, so did her mother. It took them an embarrassingly long time to realise that Kaisa was the librarian who Hilda always talked about and that Johanna was the mother the girl mentioned when they were together, but once they did, it took the two women no time to bond over their fondness for the girl and her group of friends, over their routines, their tastes and struggles. After Johanna had made her promise to never again give her daughter any dangerous magical devices, that was.

They had become, at the very least, friends. And Kaisa thought that with no small amount of weight to that statement, because she really couldn’t remember the last time she’d been so sure she could call someone that. But there was a line, you see. Most friendships didn’t have that line, that boundary just within eyesight that they were sure that once it was crossed, it would no longer be a platonic friendship but a romance. Most friendships didn’t have it, because when friends trusted that that’s what they were, and that was how they would be free to express the extent of their love to its fullest, then all you can see, all around you, is that friendship, as far as you can reach.

Not them, though. Both of them were very aware of that border, well aware that their love for one another was extremely capable of taking another shape, one that would actually let them breathe freely and satiate the longing inside them.

There was a line. They were aware of the line. And they kept tip-toeing on it and jumping back each time. Scared of what would happen if they crossed it. Scared of what the other would think.

Personally, Kaisa would love to rip the blasted line out of the ground and use it as something more interesting. An aisle for one of them to walk towards the other on, for example. She’d had quite enough of catching herself sighing yearningly at the window on sunny days and squealing when her phone pinged with a message from her. And that was to say nothing of the embarrassing (-ly frequent) daydreams. She felt she’d had quite enough of pining being a woman almost in her thirties.

The thing was, taking the first step wasn’t something Kaisa was willing to do. Not right now, at least. Johanna might only be a couple of years older than her, but she felt like the woman was aeons ahead of her. She was mature and well resolved, independent and capable of taking care of herself, her daughter, and however many magical creatures there currently were in her house. How could Kaisa, in all sincerity, offer herself up for a woman like that in her current state, knowing she’d end up as nothing more than another source of trouble for her?

No. Kaisa was willing to wait. She rather thought Johanna was too, judging by how that line kept being played with. They’d get to crossing it, well and properly. But first, she wanted to get a little closer to being the person she thought Johanna deserved. A little braver. A little more put together. A little less worried about what people who didn’t give a single damn about her well being thought of her. And she was making progress, she really was. But until then, that uneasy friendship would be more than enough. She’d take it and be grateful it was even being offered, making sure to show her appreciation for Johanna’s presence in her life every single day.

Which was why when the woman showed up at the library that morning, wringing her hands together in anxiety and with a frown between her eyebrows, Kaisa immediately dropped what she’d been doing to go talk to her.

“Hey, Anna, good morning.” She greeted in a soft tone of voice, making her startle slightly upon noticing Kaisa’s presence. The librarian had approached her from behind, but even so she thought the behaviour was slightly off. She was never this jumpy, was she? “Everything alright?”

There were a couple of moments when Kaisa genuinely wondered if she was talking to the wrong person. Maybe there was some bizarrely accurate Johanna lookalike in town now and she just hadn’t been aware. The point was, a full twenty seconds must have passed in which Johanna said and did nothing other than stare at Kaisa with that same frown she’d walked in with.

“Johanna?”

“Yes, I’m fine.” She answered at last, but her voice didn’t sound at all certain. “I’m… it’s alright. Thank you for asking. But what about you?”

Kaisa quirked an eyebrow. As soon as Johanna had been broken out of her unexpected stupor, she’d begun leading them to the library’s break room, where the workers could go should they need some water, coffee, or just to sit down and not to interact with people for a bit. So essentially Kaisa’s personal personal winding down and chugging coffee corner. They’d been there many times before, chatting until after the library’s closing hours about anything at all. However, when Kaisa was about to sit down on one of the ancient armchairs, she turned back to see that Johanna was still standing by the doorway, looking at her feet and shifting her weight between them.

“Is it okay if we stay out here?”

Her lifted eyebrow melted into a frown as Kaisa walked out of the break room again.

“Well, sure we can, but what’s going on?”

“Nothing.” Johanna said, too quickly. “We’re okay, I promise. I just popped by to ask you if you were fine.”

Kaisa’s heart did a flip inside her chest. Which was very uncomfortable, considering a structure tied to so many vases wasn’t supposed to be moving around much at all. The words sounded reassuring, but they hit her as anything but. When she saw Johanna walk in like that, she’d assumed something had happened and that she could help, even if only by listening to her. Now the thought at the forefront of her mind was that she’d messed up somehow. Because she hadn’t even considered that they might not be fine, but now she sure as hell was doing it.

“What, me? Sure I am.” She closed the break room door behind herself, figuring that if the idea of going in there made Johanna uncomfortable she should eliminate the possibility altogether. “I mean, I am normal. I woke up at the normal time and came to my normal job that I do every day. Little pissed that I just had to ask a group of teenagers to be quiet, but that’s it. I’m not sure I understand your question.”

Johanna still wouldn’t look at her, which was off putting. Kaisa was the one who liked to look away when they talked, only because it made it easier for her to concentrate on the conversation, but she could always feel Johanna’s eyes on her. This time, Kaisa actively tried to catch her gaze, wondering if looking at her eyes would give her any explanations to the way she was acting, but without success.

The woman cleared her throat. “It’s just… last night, when you called me. You sounded a little… out of it. And I wanted to check that you were fine and safe.”

Kaisa blinked. Stared at her. Continued staring at her until Johanna finally looked at her face and saw her own confusion reflected back. She looked a little embarrassed, a light pink colour painting her cheeks and the bridge of her nose.

“I didn’t call you.”

“What?”

“Johanna, I didn’t call you. As far as I’m concerned, the last time we talked was when we went to the bake shop two days ago. When was this call?”

Now, the librarian wasn’t trying to gaslight her. She didn’t think Johanna was crazy, much less a liar. But neither was Kaisa an amnesiac, so she’d probably remember calling the woman she was head over heels for; there had to be a logical explanation for this.

“Roughly at three in the morning, I think.” Johanna answered, looking uncertain in the face of Kaisa’s conviction even though she sounded actually sure of the time she was informing. Kaisa snorted.

“Well, I have no idea who that was, but I can assure you you’re not looking at them.”

“But it was your voice.”

“Anna, I go to sleep at nine thirty and wake up at six. I do that religiously, because otherwise I become a massive bitch come morning.”

“Well-” Johanna looked like she was getting uncomfortable in a different way now, being put in the spot like that. Kaisa softened. She’d assumed that assuring her that she wasn’t responsible for whatever that was would make the situation easier on her. But come think of it, being phoned by a stranger that could pass as one of your closest friends couldn’t be too soothing either. “I thought you might not remember because, well, you sounded-”

Kaisa nodded for her to go on once she looked insecure about whether she should finish that sentence. Johanna did so with a whisper.

“Affected?”

Johanna looked at her expectantly, making Kaisa feel bad that she could offer her nothing other than even more confusion. She’d need to make herself more clear if she wanted anything out of the witch.

“Sorry, affected by…?”

“Well-” Johanna rubbed her neck, looking around them, and the ceiling, down again. Everywhere but at Kaisa. “I don’t know. Alcohol. Drugs. Something like that. Not that I’m judging!” She put her hands in front of herself immediately, and if she took the chance to really take in Kaisa’s face she’d see how that possibility was even weirder to her than it was to Johanna. “But I was just worried about how you might be. So. Yeah.”

Kaisa wanted to be helpful. She really did. But Johanna had just asked someone whose ideas of reckless behaviour ranged from waking up the dead to skipping dinner to eat jorts, and nowhere in that spectrum was partying hard and using any sort of substance. It was hard to even take her worry over her seriously, which was a shame, since under any other circumstances Kaisa would have been over the moon with such a treatment.

“Johanna. Look at me.” She did. “Under what circumstances can you imagine me getting high at three a.m.?”

It was her right arm instead of her neck that she rubbed in anxiety this time. “Well, none, but-”

They stared at each other, Johanna with an anxious look and Kaisa with a compassionate one. Eventually, she sighed.

“You’re right. It must have been a dream.” Her shoulders slumped. “Oh, gosh, this is so embarrassing. I’m sorry, Kaisa.”

Her friend laughed, glad that apparently there wasn’t even a problem to be solved. Maybe now they could have their coffee and some regular chatting.

“Don’t stress about it. I should be flattered you’re dreaming about me.”

Kaisa walked back into the break room, heading straight to the coffee machine to brew a new batch. In doing so, she failed to notice how Johanna still lingered by the doorframe, watching her for any signs of untruthfulness or discomfort.

Through gritted teeth, the woman whispered to her own ears only. “You have no idea…”

…......

Kaisa got deja vu often. She supposed it was a mix of her brain loving to make associations and the fact that all witches had some future telling abilities, even if hers were quite weak, so she supposed there were some things in her life that she had seen before, even if at the back of her mind, a simple suggestion made by that more magical part of her consciousness.

That particular image, however, she was very sure she had seen before, and when, and where. It had been at that same place, at the same time, the very day before.

This morning, however, when Johanna spotted her, she clutched her purse strap closer to herself, making Kaisa halt her approach. She only ever did that when she was scared.

Was she scared of… Kaisa?

The thought hit her like a knife between her shoulder blades, but she still put on a smile for her. She didn’t get any closer, though. It was best to let Johanna approach her.

She didn’t. She stood there, two metres away like she was talking to a stranger. The knife twisted inside her.

“It happened again.” She said, sounding surer than she had the day before. “I was awake. I checked. Nothing happened when I pinched myself and my fingers and clocks looked normal. I wrote a note saying it was real and it was still there when I woke up this morning.”

Kaisa sighed. “Anna, I don’t know what to tell you. I didn’t call you. I certainly didn’t get drunk, or high. It must have been a prank of some sort.”

Johanna’s mouth twisted, like she was trying to bite something back. “Yes. It must have been.”

The witch dared to take a step forward; only one, though, because Johanna immediately tensed. Someone else might not have noticed it, but Kaisa couldn’t not.

“Are you… angry at me, Anna?”

Her voice was harsher than Kaisa had ever heard it before when she answered. “No. Why would I be angry at you for something you didn’t do?”

“I have no idea, but you sure as hell sound like it right now.”

“Why do you look tired?” Johanna snapped, shoulders squared back though the displeasure at acting like that was written clearly on her face. Kaisa gaped.

“Because I am borderline anaemic and wake up every day at six, maybe? You can’t really be mad at me right now, Anna. I know it must be weird to be prank called in the middle of the night and everything, not to mention whatever the hell they’re telling you to get you this worked up, but I didn’t do anything!”

Her stare grew harder, those brown eyes suddenly reminding her solid mountains, peaks so high one couldn’t ever hope to reach. But then moisture began to gather at the corners, and Johanna looked down quickly. Just not quickly enough for Kaisa to not have seen it.

“You never do, do you?” She whispered and walked quickly out of the library, leaving a befuddled librarian behind herself.

…......

One of the things Johanna missed the most about living out in the wilderness was the quiet. Since they’d moved to Trolberg, she’d hardly ever managed to have a single night’s sleep that was as peaceful as when the only sounds that could be heard during the night were of the owls and cicadas, the forest’s own little lullaby for its only two human inhabitants to hear. It wasn’t like Trolberg was some big metropolis where they were subjected to the noise of traffic jams and drunken yelling in the early hours of the morning, of course. But it wasn’t the same. There was always an odd motorcycle, or the footsteps of their upstairs neighbour, the sound of a television when someone in their building turned to it after having trouble sleeping.

And, for the past two nights, there had been the blasted ringing of their landline.

The first time, she’d found it beyond weird. Nobody ever called them at that time of the day (well, night). But the phone would have kept ringing had she not picked up, and she didn’t want it to disturb Hilda. So Johanna had dragged herself out of bed, mumbling and rubbing at her eyes, and walked to the kitchen to simply tell whoever was at the other side of the line that they had the wrong number and hang up.

It didn’t go like that, however. Because as soon as her ear was on the speaker, a voice she knew slurred her name.

“Kaisa?!” She’d whispered with urgency, figuring from the time of the call and from her clearly subdued voice that something was wrong. “What’s the matter?”

She hadn’t answered for a couple of seconds, but Johanna knew she was still there. She could hear her breathing.

“I’m in love with you.” Kaisa sighed eventually, in a dreamy voice. “That’s the matter.”

Since the whole point of picking that call at all was not waking Hilda up, Johanna had to make a lot of effort to be silent when she choked on air at that statement. Her face heated up immediately and she gripped the phone’s handle, looking around herself to make sure there was no one near and listening. As if that would help. If either Tontu or Alfur really wanted to listen in, there would really be nothing she’d be able to do about it.

That was not how she’d imagined this conversation going.

“What?” She whispered into the microphone. “Kaisa, that’s lovely-” She mentally slapped herself. What kind of reaction to ‘I’m in love with you’ was that? Kaisa deserved better. But then, Johanna had also thought she deserved at least a face to face confession, though she should probably consider herself lucky to be getting one at all. “- but why are you telling me this right now?”

“I can’t tell you this.” Kaisa continued, which Johanna hardly thought could be considered an answer to her question. Her voice was distant, the cadence unlike it had been in any of the times they’d been together previously. Still, Johanna knew it to be her voice. She��d recognize it anywhere. “I can’t tell you that I want you close at all times. I can’t tell you that you’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever met. I can’t even tell you I want to know everything about you. Because I’m not… not ready. You deserve someone better than me, and I’m not ready.”

Her tone wasn’t emotional. For all that she was saying, she didn’t sound like she was making a confession, but like she was listing facts. Johanna was sure her face must be completely red at that point, her heart picking up a speed she wasn’t entirely sure was healthy. She still had just enough reason to be able to tell that none of that sounded normal.

“Kaisa, love, tell me what’s going on.” She urged. They’d hung out not a full 48 hours before. Kaisa had been acting normally around her and showing no signs of wanting to confess an avalanche of deeply buried feelings. Something had to have happened.

“I know it’s selfish of me, but I want to be with you anyway.” Another string of words that sounded like they barely had any thought given to them as they were pushed out of Kaisa’s mouth. It wasn’t an answer. The witch had probably not even heard her. “I want to wake up with you and cook with you and come home to you at the end of the day-”

Oh, gods.

“I want to be someone you can call yours-”

Kaisa was high, wasn’t she?

“Kaisa, where are you?” Johanna attempted once more, even though the confessions didn’t stop coming from the other end of the line. “Do you need to be picked up? Are you safe? Are you home?”

Nothing. Well, not nothing. A lot, really, but only a lot of sappy feelings that had nothing to do with Kaisa’s current state at all.

It must have gone on for half an hour. Johanna didn’t know how to make her stop, and figured that at least she knew Kaisa was fine as long as she was speaking to her on her phone. There was of course also the fact that she’d waited for so long to hear those things that she was too selfish to hang up now, even if these were far from the circumstances she would have preferred. After she’d seemed to run out of things to say, Kaisa asked in just as distant of a voice.

“What do you think?”

Johanna took a deep breath. She’d sat down on the floor at some point, the landline’s cable extended to allow her to do so.

“I think you need to rest, my dear.” She uttered softly, still worried. “We can talk about it when you’re better.”

The line went silent. Kaisa had hung up.

Johanna still sat there, cradling the phone’s handle and looking straight ahead with an unfocused case for a few more minutes. She had no idea how to process what had just happened. Kaisa had just said everything Johanna could have asked for in her most self centred fantasies, and more. But she didn’t feel ecstatic like she should. She felt hollow. Because of the context, she felt foolish, even. That night, she’d gone to bed and her only thought had been ‘what now?’

But then she’d showed up at the library, and Kaisa had acted exactly as she would have any other day. Like nothing had happened. Like she hadn’t gotten high as a kite and declared her undying love in the dead of night. And she’d been so sure of it too, without any signs of any unusual activities the night before, even. Johanna had let herself be convinced it was only a dream. That would have made sense, right? Only in dreams did people’s crushes confess to them like they were writing a love letter. In Johanna’s case, only in dreams did people confess to her at all. She should have known better.

Except it had happened again the night after that. Johanna had made sure to check everything that could give away that she was dreaming, but everything around her looked perfectly… real. Except for Kaisa. Her voice drifting from the phone, saying how much she craved to have her near, couldn’t possibly belong to reality. And yet, it did.

Not that any of it had helped matters when she’d come to talk to Kaisa about it. Depending on what substance she’d been on, it would have made sense for her to forget what had happened. That wasn’t the issue here; had it all been handled differently, Johanna should have been happy to wait for as long as the witch needed for her to actually admit her feelings. But all she’d been met with was vehement denial. Maybe she was ashamed, but going so far as to imply that Johanna was wrong, or lying? Implying that it could be a random prankster had her at the end of her rope. As if Johanna could ever mistake Kaisa’s voice for anyone else’s. At that point it was as entangled in her mind as the sounds of the forest or of her pencil on sheets of paper.

All of that only allowed her to arrive at one conclusion. That it was deliberate.

For the third night straight, Johanna forced her legs to take her to the kitchen. Her head hurt; it had been difficult to fall asleep again after the calls, leaving her exhausted physically as well as emotionally. She hoped it would be something different this time. That maybe Kaisa had come to her senses and would admit that she was drunk, or high, or just plain sorry.

She hoped for anything other than what she got.

“I’ve fallen for you harder than I thought I could. I didn’t know I could like someone this much.”

Johanna groaned. Groaned. Because somehow her biggest dream had turned into a nightmare in the matter of three days. Was loving her such an embarrassing thing that it could only be mentioned in the dead of night? No, that wouldn’t make sense. Kaisa would at least act coy if that was the case, give her the slightest indication that she did mean what she’d said or that she even remembered what she’d said. For her to sound like that, to say all that, and to vehemently deny it only left Johanna with one conclusion.

For two nights, she’d withstood that. It had to be some sort of joke, and a cruel one at that. To force her to hear everything she wanted, only to see that it changed nothing come daylight. It was torture. And it was clever. Clever because it hit exactly where it hurt, because it would drive Johanna insane while leaving Kaisa safe in her bubble of plausible deniability. All that was left to assume was that Kaisa had actually found out that Johanna had feelings for her and was using it to make fun of her. Maybe she wouldn’t do it when she had full control of herself, but apparently whatever she was using to make her sound like that made the allure of the prank too sweet for her. And then, come morning, she must remember it and deny ever using anything at all, either because she knew what she was capable of under the influence or because she was well aware of the game she was playing and wanted to continue at it.

It was a joke, and Johanna was at the butt of it. She had to remind herself of this. Because otherwise, she’d never have been able to finally, on that third night, hang up on Kaisa while she uttered the most lovely words Johanna had ever heard.

…......

Everything had changed since the last time they’d talked. Johanna didn’t invite her out anymore. She didn’t stop by the library to see her ‘just because’. She didn’t go anywhere Kaisa frequented at all, at least not while she was there. She didn’t even answer her texts or pick up her phone. And the worst part was, Kaisa didn’t even know what she’d done. She knew she needn’t worry for the other woman, since the trio was at the library often and that gave Kaisa a chance to ask Hilda about her mother. Given that the girl had taken to glaring at her before saying Johanna was fine, thank you very much, she was left to believe she must have screwed up somehow, even if she couldn’t figure it out.

She’d resisted all of two weeks under these circumstances before she’d caved. Her mind screamed at her that she was being stupid all the while her feet were taking her to the apartment complex where she’d spent so many enjoyable evenings drinking tea and giggling over nothing, but she ignored it. Johanna should be the one to reach out to her and tell her what she’d done to deserve being ghosted like that, should look at her in the eyes and tell her how Kaisa could be better for her. But she hadn’t done so, and Kaisa couldn’t take it anymore. She wanted her best friend. And if that meant swallowing her fear and her pride, well. She’d been the one to screw up in the first place, hadn’t she?

Probably.

At least she’d resisted the urge to buy flowers before heading there. The art of toeing the blasted line lied at the mixed messages peppered in every gesture that could be interpreted as romantic, and she rather didn’t think there’d be anything mixed or up to interpretation about giving another woman a bouquet of white roses.

Kaisa knocked on her door, knowing that the woman must be home since it was still early enough for her to have interrupted her self-imposed work hours. She’d managed to sneak away from the library earlier than usual precisely for that reason, even if Johanna didn’t go out much either way. Her voice came from the other side, a soft ‘coming!’ muffled by the wall between them. When the door was opened. Johanna was wearing a carefully crafted serene expression. Which melted away immediately at the sight of Kaisa.

To the witch’s absolute horror, Johanna stepped away from her.

“Oh.” She breathed, her voice guarded. “It’s you.”

What the hell is that supposed to mean?, she wanted to scream. Instead, she frowned and nodded. “Yes. Hi, Anna.”

“What do you want?” Johanna snapped, crossing her arms. She didn’t sound or look pissed, though, only sad and even scared as she looked at Kaisa’s feet rather than her face. And tired. Very tired.

So was Kaisa, if she was honest. She hadn’t woken up feeling truly rested in weeks.

“Well-” Kaisa struggled for something to say. Johanna had always been the more well spoken between the two of them. She’d truly thought that she’d arrive here and only have to listen to her explain what was going on. Having to actually voice anything hadn’t been part of her plan. “Isn’t it obvious?”

The woman’s face snapped to her at that, anger in her eyes. Kaisa had never seen her like this. But then, she supposed, she’d never hurt the woman before either.

“If you’re going to tell me the same thing as the last times, just give up.” She stated, making sure her shoulders were set back, voice a lot less unwavering than she would have liked. “I’m not going to let you treat me like this.”

Kaisa gaped at her. “Wait.” She lifted a hand, suddenly feeling anger rise up in her own chest. “This is still about the prank calls you’ve been getting?”

No matter how strongly Kaisa felt she was the one who should be offended here, Johanna’s furrowed brows and pursed lips told her very clearly how affronted she was that Kaisa would have the gall to react the way she did.

“Stop it. I won’t hear you out if you’re only going to lie either. You should be going.”

“Yes, I really should, shouldn’t I?” Kaisa snapped, surprising both of them with the fire in her voice. She truly wasn’t able to help it in the face of Johanna’s coldness. For her friend - and calling her that now felt like a mockery to what they had - to toss her away like that without even hearing her out, she could only have been looking for a reason to fight with her. Just waiting for an excuse to get rid of the witch. Well, Kaisa wasn’t about to get in her way.

She turned her back to her and walked back the way she came with all the certainty she didn’t feel, letting the hurt drive her away. She’d thought Johanna was the better one between the two of them. She thought that she’d at least have been given a reason, an explanation, or a proper conversation instead of just being accused over nothing for the woman to justify throwing their friendship away to herself. Didn’t matter, though. Not anymore.

The sound of her shoes on the building’s staircase was loud as she stomped away. Loud enough to drown out the sound of Johanna’s sniffles.

…......

The phone rang, like it always did, at three in the morning. The headache that had been her companion for many days now screamed at the sound. Johanna was already awake, of course. Her body had developed some sort of pavlovian response and she now always woke up exactly at 2:55 a.m., anxious about her daughter being startled out of her slumber by the ringing.

She got up from the couch wearily, and picked it up. After a couple of seconds of looking at it, she actually brought it to her ears. After the third time, she’d taken to leaving it on the counter for about half an hour, before placing it back onto the hook. It wasn’t like Kaisa was ever interested in what she had to say, anyway, so it didn’t really matter, and Johanna was afraid she’d ring again if she just hung up on her. But she’d actually showed up that afternoon. Hadn’t acknowledged what she’d been doing, sure, hadn’t apologised or offered a semblance of an explanation. She’d even yelled at her, considering the standard low volume that her voice usually had. But maybe that meant she was willing to rethink, willing to maybe take a step back and undo this mess. Maybe she’d come to her senses at last, maybe she’d stopped using whatever had been making her act like that.

With foolish hope, Johanna dared to listen to her voice one last time.

“Hi, Johanna.” Said the dreamy, far away voice. So not sober, then. “I love you. Every time you smile at me I feel like I’m flying-”

She wanted to scream. Nothing had changed. Nothing would change. And Johanna was exhausted, from this dance, from this heartbreak, from not knowing when was the last time she had slept peacefully without being woken up by this blatant and cruel ridicule.

She listened. Johanna actually was pathetic enough to listen to twenty more minutes of Kaisa saying exactly how she felt every time they were together, because she wasn’t sure she’d ever hear that voice again. And when she could finally bring herself to, she put the phone handle on the kitchen counter, and opened one of the kitchen drawers.

The scissors were exactly where she always left them. They were only ever used to open up food packages, but that didn’t matter. They managed to cut the landline’s cable just fine.

…......

It had been a long time coming. Truly, what had led her to believe a woman as lovely as Johanna would want to give her the time of the day? Maybe she’d enjoyed it for a couple of months. She might have only been doing it to be charitable, making an awkward loner like Kaisa feel like she had someone to rely on. But it hadn’t lasted, because how could it? Kaisa was who she was, and nobody could stand her for long. Eventually, people realised they couldn’t change her. They realised she was too annoying, too boring, too offputting to stand. And if Johanna had chosen that way to break them off, did she really have the right to be angry? She’d probably been giving her signs she didn’t want Kaisa nearby for ages, but Kaisa never took a hint, did she?

It made sense, now. Johanna didn’t blush when Kaisa complimented her because she liked it. It was because she made her uncomfortable. Her eyes didn’t widen when Kaisa asked her out because she was pleased. She’d merely been caught without an excuse to refuse. She didn’t tease Kaisa about her quirks because she found them charming. They were either attempts at getting her to change her habits or straight up jabs, hidden behind sweet words and a honeyed voice.

There was no line. There had never been a line. Kaisa was just delusional and pushing for something she’d never have. Kaisa was unlovable. She knew she was unlovable, and had accepted that a long time ago. It was her own fault for letting gentle touches and soft spoken affirmations convince her otherwise, her own fault for being so utterly incapable of making alright decisions, her own fault for only ever having bad ideas.

Gods, she was drained.

#Being a Gomens and ofmd fan means I am now traumatized by gays who are in different stages of noticing and dealing with their feelings #and refusing to talk about it.#Angst day in sketchbook week means I get to get it out of my system <3 #sketchbookweek #sketchbook ship #sketchbook ship hilda #sketchbook ship fanfic #kaisa hilda fanfic #johanna hilda fanfic #cw: drugs #cw: alcohol #my fic #fic: dobiy

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