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'I love you' isn't enough | drabble
Analogical angst
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"You should eat." Virgil stated, eyes not leaving his book. "You haven't eaten since Tuesday. It's Thursday."
Logan groaned. "I'm enjoying a wonderful moment, thank you."
A huff of laughter tumbled from the others lips. "Yeah? And how would you describe this wonderful moment of yours?" Virgil cast a side glance in the direction of his snoozing boyfriend.
Logan sighed tiredly. "I can not call this heaven because I only have a vague idea of what heaven is supposed to be, and thus, I cannot conclude how heaven feels, or looks. However, I do not believe I could ever be this content, feel this fulfilled, or love so much without you." Logans voice was fogged with sleep, as he himself was dozing in and out of slumber. Laying on his stomach on his bed, arm draped lazily over Virgils mid-section as he read an artist anatomy book.
A ghost of a smile crossed Virgils lips, purple locks hiding mismatched eyes. "You've been reading poetry, haven't you?" He softly inquired, his right hand running through Logans hair soothingly.
"No, I have not." He chuckled, squeezing Virgil lightly. "Just a passing string of thoughts. Some might even dare say 'facts'." He smiled, glasses riding up the bridge of his nose as he tried to nuzzle further into his boyfriends side.
"'A passing string of thoughts', you say." A tinge of amusement in his voice. "A passing string of thoughts is usually mundane and/or silly. Don't tell me you think in, like, Shakespeare or something." He quirked his brow, looking at Logan with a playful gaze.
"Is Shakespeare something you'd like?" Logan laughed out, earning that beautiful smile of his.
"Maybe."
"Ah," Logan nodded, closing his eyes, his face turning focused. "Well, then. 'I think therefore I am.'" He opened his eyes and smiled up at Virgil.
Virgil stared at him for a second before bursting out into a fit of laughter, hair bouncing through the sun rays from the window. God, from here everything was perfect. Virgils eyeshadow beneath his eyes were scrunched up while he laughed while his adorable freckles proudly stood underneath the scrutiny of the sun.
This moment was perfect. "You're perfect." Logan muttered, staring up at his boyfriend. So quiet Logan wouldn't be surprised if he wasn't heard.
Virgils laughter died down at that, a soft look replacing his boisterous laughter, staring at Logan. Virgil adjusted himself until he was laying beside Logan, facing him.
"I love you too." He whispered the sarcastic lilt he originally had planned forgotten as his breath fluttered across Logans face. "You need to take care of yourself for me though, alright?" He chuckled. "You should eat for me, okay?"
At that moment, Logan felt a surge of emotions rush through him. Sorrow, devotion, Joy, 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦. And Logan would be the first to admit that he wasn't good at voicing how he felt, but, he had to.
"Virgil, 'I love you' isn't enough to explain how I feel. It's used too much and too lightly to get it across." The words weren't rushed, or slurred. Logan made sure his voice remained steady, and calm. "You're the sun I orbit around. You are the hope I feel in the most hopeless of times. The air I crave when I can't breathe. The answer I search for when presented with a question. You're the blood in my veins and the dreams in my sleep. My life would be so drastically different if I had never met you and I'm so thankful that you were in my life. I love you. I would do anything to hold you even if I had to spend the rest of my days crawling across glass to get to you. You're my everything." Logan was breathless when he finished, refusing to stop for anything.
A tear fell from the bridge of Virgils nose, hitting the mattress with an inaudible 'splat'. Virgil cupped Logans face, a bittersweet smile on his own. He leaned forward, and rested his forehead on Logans.
"How I wished I could've told you that sooner." Logans voice broke, a terrible whimper in it's place. Logan reached out and wrapped his arm around Virgil. "I should've said it a long time ago." He sobbed, clutching Virgil tightly.
"Oh, Lo.." It was soft, and weary. "You're wonderful." Virgil breathed back, he was tearing up too. "And I knew you felt that way, Lo. Don't for one second think I didn't." Virgil placed a light kiss on his forehead.
"I just want to hold you one last time. To say I love you before you- before you are violenty taken from my grasp." Logan didn't hold back his tears.
Logans head pounded violently and Logan pushed away images of Virgil in a casket.
"I just want to see your face one last time." Logan was beginning to struggle with his breaths. "If you walked through my door right now I would propose to you on the spot." He choked out, feeling weak. "I just want to hear your breath when I wake up. I want this to be a bad dream." Logan sobbed even harder. Refusing to open his eyes and face reality.
"I miss you.."
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Hope you enjoyed 💜
Words: 866
Tag list{you can ask to be added or removed}:
@reiney-weather @helloidkwhatimdoing-0 @autumnpleaves @hedgiehoggles @emo-sunshine42 @sky-the-weirdo-ace @from-the-gall0ws
#sander sides#virgil sanders#logan sanders#analogical#angst#my writing#seb writes things#dealing with grief
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congrats on baby #2!🥰👍 part 2 to this post bc seb is a smug ass bitch when it comes to getting clora pregnant. and ty @rednite-dork for sending me the original pic ages ago LMFAO... i knew as soon as i saw it that i had to redraw it eventually 👼
#anne 1000% took the picture LMFAO......lewis-induced vomiting#i wanted to have the design of their kids out before drawing this since seb has to be holding their firstborn....widdle chubby ceweste#choccyart#sebastian sallow#sebastian sallow x oc#sebastian sallow x mc#clora clemons#hogwarts legacy#also ive started on the seb and clora as curse breakers oneshot🥰im still only on the outline and still ironing things out but#im excited to start writing it hehe......protective adult seb does stuff to me....🧎♀️🧎♀️🧎♀️#the premise is them investigating a town that has a bunch of strange occurrences going on that might be bc of a cursed object#AND THATS ALL ILL SAY..............clora living her sherlock life fr#OMG WAIT thats actually a cute idea LMFAO i should legit have clora try to channel sherlock when shes investigating BAHAHA😭😭#if anyone has any ideas/things theyd wanna see abt them as adults on the job lmk send me an ask/anon or reply im open to suggestions#the oneshot is gonna be pretty lighthearted and slice of life so#tho there IS a smut scene at like the very beginning that i wasnt planning on BAHAHA but thats just what happens when u write seb...😮💨
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not to be That Person™, but I wanted to let you guys know that no, I am not quitting or leaving the pressure the community anytime soon. yes, I am aware of the drama and problems that have been going on inside of this fandoms walls, and yes, I have my own personal opinions about it. however, I am not going anywhere anytime soon
#just because a LOT of people seem to be quitting or removing themselves from the spaces#and someone asked me about it in probate#im still gonna write and create for pressure#something something seperate the art from the artist. though i can get why some of it would make you uncomfortable#this whole thing just fucking sucks#ill write a little sebastian fluff piece soon to alleviate some foul taste for those who still are heavily attatched to him#i know my interactions are most likely gonna drop and thats gonna be suuuper disheartening but. yk. im here for a long run unfortunately#. not sebs .#sebastian pressure#sebastian solace pressure#pressure roblox#roblox pressure#*PRIVATE. not probate
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I think it's a rumour started by a parody joke account, but the way we all heard a variation of "F1 driver Franco Colapinto hits it off with Norwegian Princess" and immediately went:
#f1#formula 1#formula one#franco colapinto#like he's smooth af and his flirtations with reporters rival freaking prime red bull era seb#I'd buy it#so.... who's going to write the fic?#me irl: *cannot understand how monarchies are still a thing*#me reading books/fic with royal characters: absolutely please give me ten more of these!#what can i say? i was raised on the Princess diaries#if chris pine isn't back for the 3rd film -
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KRICKET PLEASE GOD GOD GOD—
especially the, “are you going to come again for me?” and “you can take more.” 😵💫😵💫😵💫
hhhhhhhh seb 💗 right tho I feel like it’s giving soft dom!Joel vibes 🫠🫠
and YEAH… Joel Miller + “good girl” makes me absolutely WEAK in the fucking knees 😵💫😵💫🫠🫠
You know he’d be the sweetest, softest dom, always checking in with you to make sure you’re okay and comfortable and feeling good.
smut under the cut* ❤️
You’re sat in Joel’s lap, instantly left feeling empty and whimpering at the loss of him as he gently lifts you off of his cock. Your thighs like jello from pushing yourself up and down his length while you rode him, practically melting against him after he’s just pulled your third orgasm out of you—your arms around his shoulders and face buried in his neck.
“Doin’ so good for me, darlin’,” he praises, and you can’t help but mewl against him as the tip of his still-hard cock bumps against your swollen, sensitive clit. “How’s my good girl?”
“Think ya got one more in you?” You nod against him, and one of Joel’s large hands moves to the crown of your hair to gently pull your head from the crook of his neck so that you can look him in the eye.
“Use your words, baby.” His stern tone eliciting another gush of wetness between your thighs. “You gonna come again for me?”
“Yes, daddy… want more”
And once he gets that confirmation, Joel’s right back to absolutely ruining you. Pulling your tired form in closer for a brief, but firm kiss before flipping the two of you over on the mattress so that he’s hovering over you. Lining the tip of his cock back up with your entrance and filling you with one swift thrust of his hips, harsh in comparison to the featherlight kisses he trails along your jaw before whispering into your skin,
“You can take more.”
Whewwww I need to lie down 🫠🫠🫠❤️❤️
#joel miller#seb <3#that gif does things to me#i need that old man#soft dom!joel#joel miller smut#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller x y/n#joel miller x female reader#Joel thots#joel miller blurb#the last of us#pedro pascal characters#pedro pascal#tw daddy kink#<- just tagging in case bc I used the word daddy once#idk where that came from honestly#🤭🤭🤭#my writing#asks <3#kricket answers
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Fernando Alonso & His Relationship With Cards
I'm sure we're all familar with the cards on the back of Fernando's Vegas GP helmet by now, but did you know his relationship with cards goes a lot deeper?
I. Magic Tricks
You've probably seen or heard someone at least mention Fernando's propensity for card tricks. As far as I can tell he was doing them(publically) as far back as 2003 all the way to as recently as 2018. Even once performing a card trick, with a condom and a teddy bear(!??!?!??!!), in front of Valentino Rossi who said "How was that possible?"(x)
But how did this start? According to James Allen, "Fernando admits to having been heavily influenced by his grandfather, a mercurial figure, who taught him magic and card tricks, still one of his passions away from the race track."(x) And I'm not sure the validity of this one, because I couldn't find an actual source, but apparently he once said: "My parents are responsible for the two things I like doing most - driving and magic tricks. They bought me my first go-kart and a magician's kit."
In several interviews he described it as his hobby off track, and that he loved learning new tricks and surprising others in the garage with them! So clearly cards are pretty important to him both as a hobby but also to who he is as a person since they've been with him just as long as racing has.
II. Card Symbolism in His Helmets
This is the reason I originally made this post, but I thought I should also explain the origins of his card fascination first. As I said, we probably all remember the cards on the back of his helmet in Vegas, but did you know that wasn't the first time he had cards on the back of his helmet?
From 2008-2013, he used to have a pair of cards on the back of his helmets. The symbolisms of the cards themselves as well as the evolution of their design is really fascinating to me! Even more so with the recent development of the card choice in 2023.
Fernando said he wanted to reference his two titles in some way on the back of his helmet and after his friend sent him several ideas, he decided on having two cards(an ace of clubs and an ace of hearts, sometimes pictured with 05 and 06 on them as well), saying: "I picked the cloverleaf [the ace of clubs - Ed] to give me luck, but the only pity is that it doesn't have four leaves!"(X)
2008.
Here's the very first appearance of the cards! They're displayed flat, with the 05 and 06 clearly visible
2009.
Very similar to 2008, but with a slightly different design, and they're maybe a bit more straight with less shadow?
2010.
This is the first major change! I was sad they didn't have the years on them anymore, but then I realized they're sparkly to match with his signature lightning bolts on the top of the helmet!!
2011.
Honestly I'm still somewhat unsure if this is the actual 2011 helmet? It's pretty difficult to find clear photos of the back of helmets from older seasons. It's easiest to find them on replica sites or auction sites so I'm not 100%? But anyways, I like that this has the championship years on the underside of the cards
2012.
This is when I started getting weirdly emotional about the helmets. Do you see how they've progressed from being a centerpoint to being curled up and sad at the bottom of the helmet? Not listing the year anymore??
2013.
Same thoughts as 2012. And after this season, they cease to exist (just like his ferrari chair in the garage, WOAH CALLBACK), until cards make a reeappearance in his Vegas helmet, albeit in a different form
2013 Monaco(Honorable Mention):
For some reason 2013 helmets were easier to find proper pictures of, so I happened to witness this absolute beauty. The creativity of this helmet genuinely blows me away??? Wanting to keep the card motif, but making sure to incorporate it into the rest of the puzzle piece design?? Mwah! There was another special 2013 helmet but they didn't change the cards at all so I really applaud this one
2023 Las Vegas(The Return of The King):
The magnificent return! But look! The cards are different cards! Instead of being two aces, it's now an ace of hearts, a four of hearts(his driver number of course!) and, the, now iconic, representation of himself as a Joker. I literally could not believe my eyes when this helmet was released and I saw the Joker card, what a fucking silly old man....I really wonder if he felt nostalgic having cards on his helmet again or if he didn't think about it all and was just like, "ah cards because Vegas!!!"
III. Why Does This Matter?
*The rest of the post was factual, this is moreso my personal thoughts on the symbolism of the cards/designs
This post spawned from me recently watching the 2010 Bahrain gp and noticing "hey wait a minute...are those CARDS ON THE BACK OF HIS HELMET!?" It's a really tiny detail that's unfortunately covered up by the HANS device pretty much whenever he's wearing the helmet, so it's really difficult to spot! But I became fascinated with the fact that he had cards on his helmet before that recent helmet, and now here we are!
There's something to me about how the design of the cards evolves over the course of six seasons from the cards being front and center to being smaller, more folded up and closer to the bottom of the helmet. As I said, the 2012-2013 ones genuinely made me depressed because it feels, symbolically, like his hopes for getting another Ace are becoming more and more unlikely and falling away until they eventually fall falt and fade away entirely after 2013 and disappear for basically a decade.
But when they return? They're not the same cards! Instead of representing Fernando's championships, they now represent him as a person, displaying his driver number and his persona of being a Joker!! Though I do think it's interesting he happened to keep the Ace of Hearts, even though he talked more about the Ace of Clubs before. I'm not sure it's actually this deep in reality, but I like to think that it's him not letting his championships(and the lack thereof) define him, but rather letting who he is as a person shine and be the centerpoint instead! But on a sadder note, as @suzuki-ecstar said to me, maybe the Aces aren't there anymore because he's lost all hope for a chance at a third Ace entirely :(
#yes its finals week and im up to my eyes in coursework but instead decided to spend like 5 hours researching and writing this post#nah bcs i actually genuinely put more work into this then I think I have all semester dsfjdskjg#that thing about him using a condom and teddy bear in a magic trick genuinely had me crying with laugher. actual tears rolling down my face#<- HOW!?!? WHAT WAS THE TRICK?? its literally inconceivable to me what he did. oh if only there were pics UGH#anyways!! this post was a lot of fun to make!! i really really love the symbolism and design of helmets so this was a rly fun project#and i also went down a lot of rabbitholes while make this and saw many very weird articles from yore#i feel like i make an equal amnt of deranged posts abt seb and nando but i dont know why nando is gifted w all my well researched projects#<- i.e. chair post. that was the same level of research as this one but at least this one i could find actual sources about....#idk theres smth about the extremely long history of nando's history that evokes research posts like this KLAJSLSKDJ#theres just so much that i dont think I ever really see people discussing! so i must create.#haha what was that joke tag i wanted to make abt my researched posts? I think:#normal posts that catie normally makes in a normal fashion#<- one day ill go back and actually tag posts w that. bcs the amtn of research compared to my actual schoolwork is so unwell#fernando alonso#fa14#f1#formula 1#catie.rambling.txt#we do a little bit of f1
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I want to learn to draw Seb without any references, so I did some studies of his face 🤔
#why is this so hard? 😩#i have so many things i want to teach myself that i get way too overwhelmed way too quickly#ive been drawing the entire day because i feel very tired and exhausted and its the only thing i can motivate myself for#actually i should write on my fic so that there isnt a whole month between chapters again 😅#but instead i maybe will do some more studies for Seb 😅#or Lulu 🤔#sebastian sallow#hogwarts legacy
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hitting the lads with the babygirlification beam
#fave thing about the early 2010s grid is how bad everyone wanted jense#seb (whorish) nico (ambivalent) lewis (i could write a whole essay on those tweets alone)#nando (incomprehensible) and mahk webs ('i miss the camaraderie of guys like jb haha') not pictured here but use ur imagination#jenson button#lh44#nr6#sv5
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ahhh new story tomorrow guys but don;t expect too much cause i was beefing with writer's block throughout the entire process so it might not be my best work (booo *throws tomato*) it's honestly done but i need fresh eyes to check for inconsistencies and typos soooo yall will see it tomorrow <3
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I'm Breaking Up With You | Dukeceit
Requested by @sky-the-weirdo-ace <3
No warnings apply, just sweetness
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It had been a quiet day, Janus had gone out to do some errands, leaving Remus to his own devices.
Remus was beginning to get bored of the string of videos that YouTube was playing while he fiddled with his mace, but was too preoccupied to change it at the moment.
The front door abruptly slammed against the wall, startling Remus and causing him to fall out of the chair. "Ow, fuck."
"Remus! Living room now! I want to talk to you about something!" Janus shouted, voice getting closer before getting further away once more.
Disregarding his things he wandered into the living room to find his boyfriend. He was standing beside the table, eyes trained on something presumably behind the wall of groceries that had been sat atop the counter. A grin was on the blondes face, a delightful gleam in his eye.
"Did you get chocolate crickets or something? Why're you so excited?" Remus chuckled, moving to stand beside him.
The breath was stolen from Remus' lungs when he saw it. A hog nosed snake curled around a branch in his new habitat. Remus was awestruck, the pattern, color, shape- it was beautiful!
"It was on sale, I couldn't pass it up!" Janus excitedly explained. "Oh! And look at what else I got."
Janus turned away to dig something out of a bag, digging through miscellaneous objects to get to what he wanted.
"Ah! Here it is." Janus turned around just in time to see the door to their shared bedroom slam shut, the Snake nowhere to be found.
"Remus??" Janus stepped towards the door, and frowned when the click of their lock sounded. "What's wrong? Rem?"
Remus huffs loudly before shouting "WE'RE BREAKING UP! THIS SNAKE IS MY BOYFRIEND NOW!"
Janus huffed a laugh at his boyfriends antics. "It would be 'girlfriend', Rem!" He grinned when the door slowly unlocked and opened.
Remus peeked out from behind the door. "She's still the love of my life." He had a pout if the tilt of his mustache was any thing to go by.
Janus nodded, his heart swelling. "Well, don't you want your 'true love' to get all fed?"
Remus contemplated this a moment before nodding. "Fine, yes, the Duke shall feed the Lady of Hognose." With his nose pointed upward he walked past Janus, Snake wrapped around Remus' hand and arm.
Janus almost said 'I love you' on the spot.
"Then let's get her food."
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Bonus scene:
"Have we got a name for my lady yet?" Remus inquired curiously while observing the snake in its new habitat.
"Mm, I don't know." Janus hummed, sitting on their shared bed. "Do you have any ideas?"
Remus turned, eyes wide with excitement. "YOU'RE GONNA LET ME HELP NAME IT?!" he all but squealed.
"Yeah, of course?" Janus laughed out, his heart melting at his boyfriends overall childlike wonder, quickly turning to a mischievous smirk.
Remus had quickly crossed the room and jumped atop of Janus, earning a pained groan while Remus peppered Janus with kisses.
"Okay! What's your suggestions?" He laughed out over his boyfriends antics, hands resting on the others back in a loose hug.
"Mmm.. Banana?" Remus wriggled his eyebrows.
"Hmm.... What else you got?"
"Serpiente? No! Daenerys!!"
"How about," he kisses Remus. "Serpiente," another peck. "Banana," he chuckles softly, kissing him again. "Daenerys Sanders?"
Remus pretends to think it over, leaning back for emphasis. "Hmm, I don't know."
Before Janus can open his mouth to retort, Remus leans back in, lips barely an inch apart. "I like it. Suits her." And seals the deal with a kiss.
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Hope you enjoyed! 💜
Taglist{you can ask to be added or removed}:
@reiney-weather @helloidkwhatimdoing-0 @autumnpleaves @hedgiehoggles @emo-sunshine42 @sky-the-weirdo-ace @from-the-gall0ws
#sander sides#dukeceit#remus sanders#janus sanders#fluff#domestic fluff#seb writes things#adorable relationships
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"he is willing to die for everyone": life and death for stevebucky
I wrote this because I saw a post that said something like "'A's willing to die for B'. A is willing to die for everyone, what's the big deal about the ship." it's not about stucky or any ship, but this has always been on my mind.
throughout the trilogy, they have quite different attitudes towards life.
steve to some extent has always been ready to die, partly because he has had brushes with death multiple times since he was a kid. as rebellious as steve, he probably feels like being afraid of death is a sign of weakness, so he stands up to it and dares death to finally take him. that sentiment evolved to full blown passive suicidal tendency after bucky's death. another reason is that since he became cap, he understands that he's meant for something larger than life and certainly larger than himself, he's accepted that he'd one day die for the greater good.
bucky is the opposite, he clearly wants to live. in the cut scene in catfa he ordered the unit to surrender bc they'd have a better chance of surviving that way than going up against hydra alien weapon. after caws, he was trying to find a reason to live when many people in the same situation would've just ended it (and bucky thought about it too).
which brings me to my point. for someone who's so ready to sacrifice himself, bucky is steve's reason to live, while the love for steve always trumps bucky's will to live.
like I pointed out in a previous post, even when he had no idea what he was capable of, steve jumped through fire for bucky. whereas when it was peggy who pleaded, begging him to find a way to survive the plane crush, he didn't even try.
in the same scene, bucky, who just survived weeks of torture and had a clear way out of there, refused to leave without steve, knowing full well that they could both end up dying.
sebastian made it clear that bucky only stayed because of steve. in a way, bucky knew that if he died it'd be for steve, not for the country or the greater good, just steve. and that's the only acceptable way to die in a war that he'd grown sick of.
yes, steve was willing to die at bucky's hands in that helicarrier, but alternatively, he was also leaving the choice to live completely up to bucky. the scene can be interpreted as steve telling bucky "if you remember me, save me. save us." there was only one way steve would survive, there was only one reason steve would be willing to live and that was bucky. remember that steve was so ready to die with bucky when he told maria to "fire now". bucky was the only reason he even tried to survive this.
in civil war, bucky had been trying so hard not to kill himself and build a normal life. he must've wanted to go back to steve at some point and rebuild their relationship together. but as soon as he realized not everyone was going to get out of siberia alive, he told tony "I remember all of them" so tony would go after him instead of steve. he was trading his life for steve's.
one thing about superhero ships is that, yes, they are totally willing to die for anyone. steve would totally be willing to die saving a single person from a collapsing building, but bucky is his reason to find a way to not die saving that person.
bucky is as much as hero as steve, he continued to fight when he could've just butted out and no one would've said a thing. for bucky, he wants to go home after the fights, but as long as steve is still out there risking his stupid ass, bucky will make peace with death and follow steve anywhere.
#bucky barnes#steve rogers#stucky#stevebucky#stucky is in the narrative#catfa#caws#cacw#look i know im not the best at writing ok#steve my sweet suicidal baby#in a way both of them are more than ready to die for the greater good#im not saying bucky is selfish or whatever#but bucky is much more realistic about the whole 'greater good' thing#remember when seb said steve was the only thing that kept bucky from killing himself?#their relationships with death deserve a full comprehensive analysis#the irony#cus steve never died whereas bucky died many times
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the contrast between lance/seb’s and sebchal’s social media pr videos always gets me because charles is constantly looking at sebastian like he’s the second coming of christ, meanwhile lance has the biggest “peacefully minding my own business” aura i’ve ever seen
#this isn’t to say that one is more real or genuine or better than the other just that i find it funny#how it illuminates how#frankly abnormal charles was (and still is) about seb#like contrary to whatever we write in rpfland i dont find charles particularly passive or demure at all#except for how in those years he was always deferring to seb and letting seb take the lead#like when they were doing the german video and charles just repeated what seb told him word for word no hesitation?#ofc he is a good child who respects his elders but he really let seb get away with a lot#sometimes people say out of pocket things to him and he gets that dead fish look in his eyes even tho he’s v polite about it#but#he would let seb poke fun at him with the biggest smile the silliest giggles#🐝🆑#this is an expansion of what i posted a month ago about charles’ dignity’s disappearing act but it still holds#anyth w my emoji sebchal tag is not meant to be taken seriously and are just my silly little musings
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if you’re a f1 writer here i just need advice or some recommendations about what to do bc honestly, idk what ti do anymore.
i’ve been writing for a year in wattpad and i feel exhausted af bc all i see on a daily basis are many things and behaviours from people that are consuming my mental health (at least in the spanish speaking fandom). i don’t feel enough. i feel my writing is crap. i feel no one reads what i write bc i mostly write about sebastian vettel (the man who truly helped trough the worst moments of my life) and not about charles leclerc or another “popular” driver. i feel like people don’t like what i write bc is not an enemies to lovers or an age gap trope, it’s a documentary about the favourite characters i’ve ever created.
i want my oc to be loved as i see from other authors. i want someone to like what i write. i just don’t feel like i’m good enough to continue writing even though is the thing i love the most in this world.
i have many ideas for one shots, smau of my oc, creating my very own fic “universe” but honestly, all of this is making me crazy and i feel like all the effort i make daily, balancing writing (and promoting, editing, correcting, editing chapters, etc.) is all for nothing.
any advice? should i give up wattpad and continue writing here? someone would read me here or i’ll be a clown again?
#feeling like seb here tbh with you bc I have so many things to say and if i say then you’ll cancel me#formula 1 fanfiction#formula 1 fanfic#writing#writers#writeblr#formula 1#tw vent#f1#vent post#sebastian vettel#sv5
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//bear shifter seb//short comic
As a bear, Sebastian has periods where he doesn't remember he is human. Sometimes he wakes up covered in blood. He can change at will but he can't seem to suppress the change, to force it down. If he waits for too long, the outcome will get worse, days, sometimes a full week gone from his memory. The anxiety of checking the news after waking up naked, smelling of pine needles. The bear pelt he changes into always makes its way into his field of vision sooner or later and sometimes when he puts it on he finds himself consciouly letting go of his memories, fanning the flames of instinct to take over. On those occasions, he isn't scared of losing himself anymore, it's like he was always meant to be a bear, like the man's life was a bad dream. He cries when no fur covers his weak, naked body anymore, sometimes out of relief, sometimes mourning the loss.
#sebastian vettel#f1 art#tw blood#so proud of myself for finishing this!#so in my head bear shifter seb isn't set in lika a magic universe or anything like shifters are super rare to the point of mythical#however he also isn't really a shifter it's more like hes a berserker like germanic? mythology#as in like warrior who turns into a bear/has bear rage/whatever#it runs in his family#also theres a thing i started writing about mick coming across bear seb in the woods i think maybe ill post that one day
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For @sansebastinae and @boisinnot, my fellow saint seb truthers :)
+ the usual
Yayyyy finished a drawing! Haha only took me...2 weeks. I kept going back and forth on whether I could finish it tonight, and I really wasn't going to. But then I looked at the unfinished version on a different screen and was like oh? Not too bad actually?? So I finished it :) First of all, ofc, here is the process. Kinda weird seeing it for smth like this, it makes me feel like I'm the painter in rennaisance au, not Mark dhjfkf
Ah I was gonna draw a silly renaissance au comic to accompany this(read: lighten the mood), but it's 5 am and I've still not really drafted it well, so! I'd like to finish it at some point bcs I wanna draw more chibi comics, but when I finish smth, I can't help but immediately want to post it, so part 2 will have to wait. I'll show you the outline though so you can at least imagine 😭
^ So many renaissance and beyond paintings of Saint Sebastian are always the most horny thing ever. Like pre/early rennaisance, yeah he was naked and all that, but they were pretty chaste, and uhhhhh suffering?? Well the newer paintings are suffering, but in a different way, if you know what I mean.
So I feel like Mark's the type to be overly pedantic about it, and refuses to make borderline porn of a saint, I mean, god forbid, Seb!!! But then he just. Does anyways. Because he can't control his lust for Seb even when drawing him half dead. I just imagine him holding the paintbrush in a death grip like "must not be horny. Must not draw him sexy. Must make him chaste." And then he ends up with the one seen above. Seb is all smug about it. "Wow you'd wanna fuck me even while I'm all bloody and dying? 🥺"
Mark: "oh I'll make you bloody, alright."
But god so funny to imagine Seb doing all these different slutty poses, like arching his back as much as possible, the cloth nearly falling off at all times, etc etc. And Mark finally lands on this pose bcs he hopes the suffering will outweigh the horny. It doesn't. Also Seb is genuinely serious once he actually gets into the pose, focus mode on. And honestly that's even worse for Mark, bcs it's so much more arousing to see Seb in his element, focused. Tbf I think Seb could be drinking water, and Mark would still find some way to sexualize it. Don't look at his sketches!! They're just filled with Seb doing all kinds of random activities.
Also! Here is the painting I referenced this off of, must give credit where credit is due ofc
The Dying St. Sebastian by François Fabre
Also this isn't really relevant in the context of this drawing specifically. But I looked thru a bunch of Saint Sebastian paintings while trying to find one I could reference, and I came across this middle ages one that actually looks so much like boy king seb 😭 I guess it really is meant to be!
St Sebastian between St Roch and St Peter by Pietro Perugino
Lmao but do you see the difference between early rennaisance and later work???
#i cannot control myself anymore i must draw dark things :)#past 3/4 drawings have had blood i think 😭😭 old habits returning#BUT THIS SAINTLY OKAY ITS HOLY ITS FINE#also 005. when i said id draw you a saint seb seb i meant it!!!#<- tho mostly you changed your username when i was already drawing saint seb 😭#but i was gonna dedicate it to you anyways :) so funny coincidence#i wasnt gonna put any lore in the read more cause i didnt think i had any#and then i did. as always.#if is say i have nothing to write just give me a min and i will sjdkfk#i dont draw nakedness im surprised this isnt too bad 😭😭#also im happy cause i stopped myself from stressing over it being too overly detailed#loose fabric my behated 😡😡 but then i realized. i dont have to kms over it so i didnt!#still looks pretty good :) but i mostly like his torso face and hair ahhhh#lol also ik saint seb fits older seb better but. i like twink seb okay 🫣 also its an au thing so#MAN I WISH I FINISHED THE COMIC ACCOMPANIMENT#but it just wasnt clicking and i ended up drawing this first instead#but yes humbly please take my seb offering#f1#formula 1#<- again absurd to tag this at this point but idc#sebastian vettel#sv5#catie.art.#martian#<- not inherently in the drawing itself BUT ITS THERE#tw blood#rennaisance muse au
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Just thought of a cool wrightworth concept
Hear me out, 'k?
What if they got married, but like, a long while ago, long while as in somewhere during the 7 years of hobo Phoenix
Because after Miles made himself the second dad of Trucy (even if Phoenix was reluctant to get any sort of help) and she called it out, it just sinked in
They both went "Yeah, Miles is your other dad"
And then Trucy asked if parents weren't ment to be married, as the little child she was, and they took it up like a "Okay, yeah, sure, let's get married"
And they are married, just like that (taking this up from the Japanese context, where is far easier to just get married) and there wasn't any super emotional break thru of their feelings, they just knew it was it, even tho Phoenix likes to tease Miles about the "Unnecesary feelings" from time to time
And that's it, that's the only change and it actually changes nothing, because Trucy doesn't talk about it, like, ever, its just how her family is, and that's it, unless she gets asked she won't be bringing it up
The only reason Apollo and company ever found out was because one day they noticed that "Wait, why does Mr. Wright wear a ring?"
Because neither him, not Miles usually wear it, except for their anniversary once a year, and same realization happens in the prosecutors office
And so, they ask Phoenix but he gets saved by Maya taking him out for the trial of the day, and they are left to investigate into the matter, because they don't have anything else to do anyways, and investigating stupid stuff is literally their job either way, bad thing is, their only witness is Trucy who won't tell them a thing because she thinks is more fun to let them uncover it on their own
And then you also have the team investigating on Miles' side, that would be Kay, who is curious as if this will finally lead to know who "that man" is, Sebastian, who is taking this a test to prove he's learned the methods of research of his mentor, Miles, and then Klavier also joins because he is just curious and will take in any chance to not be in his desk for five minutes and also is friends with Sebastian, they were classmates back in the day
Gumshoe is not on the team becuase he actually knows they're married, he was the witness for it as Fransizka was still out with Interpol affairs, tho that granted him a visit from her whip, actually, three of them got one for not waiting for her to be there, Maya got to record the whole thing, even if it was just signing some papers
#wrightworth#ace attorney#miles edgeworth#phoenix wright#narumitsu#phoenix x Edgeworth#my otp#headcanon#tho this would make for a funny one shot#i might write one in the future but not any time near i already got a ton in waiting list#trucy being a caothic little being is my favorite#also just want to point out kay and seb know trucy#just somehow they never got to met phoenix under the usual ridicule aa circunstances#like they were meant to met and a murder occured kind of thing#or Phoenix was going to pick up trucy and he got hit by a bus#he only got a scratch on his head tho#or one time they visited trucy and phoenix was just out in the grocery store#and he didnt come back until they were gone because the store got taken hostage
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