#screaming crying throwing up at my desk
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Tell him... I love him more than anything he could ever do wrong. ~Andor
Fang Duobing & Li Lianhua | Mysterious Lotus Casebook (2023)
#mysterious lotus casebook#li lianhua#fang duobing#fanghua#lhl#mlc#me kicking my legs up on the desk and dangling a lit cigarette from my fingers: when I say that this ol Andor quote Fucked Me Up for life..#fun fact I've had the song âmore than anythingâ from hazbin hotel in my head for several months while working on this#my brain is bees#as well as#andor quotes#just shaking crying screaming throwing up about Them always#PS I love that MLC is gaining more fans!!!#welcome to the Pain :) :) :)#my mlc gifs#andor
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a lil doodled amir for you!! đ¸đ (also ps I loooove warframe!! Thank you so much for coaching me on how to get into it a while ago!!!)
AWAWAAWAWA THERE HE ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS HE LOOKS SO GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!! AAH!!! thankyouso muchhh đđđ and OMFG im so glad ur having fun!!!!!!!!! :DDDDDD
#crowrelli#warframe#amir beckett#screaming crying throwing up taking a bite out of my desk AGH this iss so sweeeeeetttt#oh amir were really in it now......................
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Screeches to a halt in a cloud of dust HELLO I'M LATE I'M SORRY. The first Saturday of a fresh month is tomorrow, which means it's time for another community art party hosted by [VS] Verdant Shield! Last week I ran a(n also late) poll and the winner was Rata Sum, a place we haven't been since the very first small test party all the way back in January!
For those who haven't heard of them before, art parties are an idea carried over from Final Fantasy XIV - big (or small!) get-togethers for artists/writers/creatives of all kinds to hang out, chat, and create together! Put together your most eye-catching look, find someone who inspires you, and get to work! Afterwards, everyone uses the party-specific tag (ours is #VSArtParty) to share their creations so others can see and spread the love around via reblogs! The tl;dr I always say for these is this: the 'goal' of an art party isn't to be drawn, but to draw others, and share with the community!
Party details are in the image above, but I'll toss an expanded text version under the cut with things like /squadjoin information!
Location Details:
A guildmate suggested we have the party down by the docks this time so we could have a boat party, and I totally agree! I may have put Antidawn Anchorage as the primary land point, but if you have a skiff feel free to take to the water as well! Worth noting that in order to interact with others' skiffs you must be in the same party or squad, and you do not need to have a skiff of your own to interact with a party/squad member's one!
Now, for those not familiar with Rata Sum, here's a quick image of the spot in question, which can be reached by taking the Antidawn Anchorage or Dawnside Quay asura gates nearby the Magicat Court (Antidawn) and Metrical Court (Dawnside) Waypoints:
Time & Squad Details:
As always, the party will consist of two separate events, with an hour break in between (though technically people jump from one to the other immediately anyway so the NA one tends to 'start' earlier than the scheduled time).
The first party will be on EU servers and begin at 9pm Central European Summer Time (aka 3pm Eastern Daylight Time or 5 hours before in-game reset). Iâll be hosting on my EU alt account, so to join either /squadjoin or whisper Toxicologist Mosse for an invite.
The second party will be on NA servers and begin at 7pm Eastern Daylight Time (aka 1am Central European Summer Time or 1 hour before in-game reset). This one Iâll be hosting on my main account, so to join either /squadjoin or whisper Teekzi for an invite.
IMPORTANT NOTE (mostly for the NA party):Â If you join and the squad is at or above 45 members, please just taxi into the right map and then hop out of squad to allow others to do the same! Essentially all conversation now happens in say chat so you wonât miss out on anything by being outside of squad!
Closing Words:
My apologies for the extremely short notice on this one everyone, I've been slapped with a bunch of IRL stuff (it's nothing bad, don't worry!) that's kept me out of the game for longer than I'd hoped. With all the exciting game news buzzing around lately though, I might just have to set aside some proper time to let myself get invested in this again, we'll see! Anyway, as always, thank you so much to everyone who comes out to these events and helps make them so special - I can't wait to see you all again tomorrow night! âĽ
#screaming crying throwing up etc etc i'm so sorry this is late like unironically sorry#my computer and desk have been in shambles from a relocation/rebuild the past few days x.x#gw2#guild wars 2#obnoxious tourist simulator#vsartparty#đ˘đ¨
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someone in my family is giving away an old treadle-powered industrial singer sewing machine and there is NO ROOM FOR IT IN MY HOUSE
#crying screaming throwing up etc#maybe i could. get rid of my entire desk. would that work (it would not)#i was thinking maybe i could stuff it in my closet b/c i was picturing it the size of other treadle machines ive seen#but no it is So Big. theres a whole table#presumably because an industrial machine doesnt need to fold up it just lives on the factory floor or w/e#where did it even come from...#i probably should not get a treadle machine anyway (even if there was space) b/c idk if id use it at all. but. theyre so cool...#maybe someday#personal
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my in laws are obsessed with me, webtoon
#LAWWD PLEASE WHERE CAN I FIND A MAN LIKE THISSS#WHYYYY#screaming sobbing throwing up#literally dying#slamming my fist against my desk and crying#AND THE WAY HES SO COLD BUT HE LOVES HER#my in laws are obsessed with me#webtoon#love
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I JUST FELL TO THE GROUND
#my computer desk is currently on a coffee table and I have a bunch of pillows but it was still dramatic#THEY!!#bkdk#bakudeku#bnha 404#more like 404 my brain not found#bnha spoilers#screaming crying throwing up#did they just read each otehrs minds??#of course#did katsuki just fly across the battle field to hold Izukus hand(in combat)#YES HE THE FUCK DID#I havent seen too much of the AM situation but thats not sounding good
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tim get OUT OF HERE. bottom middle is so out of context. that part was weird. lowkey unnecessary; but so was the whole movie so here we are.
#DFHDS#HIM IN THE YELLOW SUIT JACKET#TIESOH#HES SO PRETTY#:sob:#bottom left is so cute though#urgh#:sooob:#sobbing#crying#screaming#kicking#throwing up#wailing#nd bashing my head on the desk repeatedly#c. thomas howell#tim pearson#grandview usa
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Xingqiu slumps onto his desk, defeated. The deadline for a special volume of A Legend of Sword is scarcely three nights away, and yet he still hasnât progressed past the first fight sequence. Every word he pens feels inadequate, his characters are becoming more and more crooked, and the sentences are crawling away from him like silkworms off the pageâone, two, three, four⌠Waitâbut the next arc⌠His valiant unnamed hero will claim a narrow victory against the Tai-Shogunâs cyborg samurai, and thenâand thenâŚ
When Xingqiuâs eyelids flutter open again, the lantern by his window has dimmed considerably. He cannot have dozed off for that long, can he?
At least his father and brother are asleep. It would be best if they never find out about his sleeping schedule.
The shadow of his hand is so sharp against the pages of his lantern-lit draft. Xingqiu traces the ridges of his knuckles, a flickering black silhouette on the page beneath it. From this angle, it almost looks like a dragonâs mouth, one of the Natlan kinds⌠Maybe heâll be able to see one in person somedayâŚ
He should try to finish this chapter, since itâs almost done anyways⌠Oh, but didnât Calx mention something about their alchemy experiments in their last letter? Perhaps they know a potion that could increase his inspiration⌠it wouldnât be too late to ask about it, right?
His eyes shut slowly.
ââqiu. Xingqiu. Hey, bookworm. Arenât you a sorry sight, hm?â Someone is poking his shoulder. He wishes they would stop. He knows that voice. Itâ
ââŚWhâ Hu Tao? Isnât it late? How did you even get in?â Where is she? Xingqiu can only stare blearily in the direction of her voice, strangely disembodied in the pitch-black room.
âThe same way I always do; donât tell me you already forgot? Anyways, there was business at Wuwang Hill tonight. It takes a long time to walk back.â There's rustling, the tap-tap of shoes against the sandalwood floor, and then a crackling of fire as Xingqiu's lantern flickers to life again. It illuminates Xingqiuâs room, his manuscript, and the girl leaning against his desk, idly twirling her hat round her thumb. A smile dances across Hu Taoâs peach blossom eyes, and her merry lips quirk up at the corners, greeting him warmly. Xingqiu is impressed by her liveliness at such an hour; anyone normal would never be in such a good mood in this dead of night. Of course, Hu Tao has never settled for normalcy. And he would be delighted to see her any other time, butâŚ
âHu Tao, I appreciate your visit, but you should head back to Wangsheng. I need to focus, and you should rest too.â Xingqiu straightens in his chair, and immediately grimacesâhis back is aching. Hu Taoâs eyes narrow, and Xingqiu resigns himself. Heâs never been able to hide much from her: not his double standards, his avoidance, his fatigue.
âYouâve been in this slump for at least a week, and youâre still putting on a brave face? Itâs unbecoming for a chivalric hero to refuse help in dire straits, Xingqiu.â Hu Taoâs voice is rarely so serious, and Xingqiu can feel her studying him, her gaze quietly burning. He looks away. When had she become so adept at instilling that indescribable feeling of shame-guilt in him?
âHow long have you been working on this dialogue? You know, inspiration wonât strike you like a lightning bolt in this dead of night, or it wouldâve already.â
âIââ Xingqiu looks back at the draft. The last sentence trails off illegibly, and there are ink splatters all over the pageâit seems his brush control is no better with less sleep. He sighs.
âAiya⌠look at you, already so despondent. Isnât your deadline still three midnights away? Come on, youâre already turning into a dull and uninspired young master. If you go on like this, soon I wonât have anyone to trade verses with anymore.â
âHey! Iâm not becoming dull or uninspired! I just⌠I just need a bit more time.â Yeah, thatâs it. He just needs to get used to the flow of his story again. After all, thereâs never been another way out, has there?
âHm. Whatever you say, young master. Listen, let me tell you about the hanged ghost mystery that cropped up a week ago; itâll send chills down your spine for sure. I guarantee it would make for an incredible plot point!â Thereâs a warm lilt in Hu Taoâs voiceâa rare teasing fondness that makes Xingqiu raise his head. She is looking at him expectantly, eyes alight with the promise of a good story, words waiting to spill from her lips like the sweet melody of just-ready rice wine.
Really, this girl. Itâs scary how much she understands him.
âOh? Then, if it pleases Master Hu to continue, my attention is all hers.â
âââ
notes: i have no idea how hu tao could get into his room tbh i just accept she's better at being a prankster than i am lmao. peach blossom eyes does not just refer to hu tao's pupils, it's an eye shape classification! i thought it fits her <3 (putting this note here since I already described it like that 2x) also just imagine that xingqiu usually has relatively fast reflexes but he's eepy and tired so he isn't as alert against intruders. also, smiles serenely. they could be each other's muses and inspirations (high honor). this is rlly just xingqiu going through The Horrors (writers block) but i hope it's decent i love him dearly. i dont actually know if hu tao was written that well tbh something about writing in limited perspective kinda fucks me up idk. the more i look at this the more things i find wrong with it but i need to be free from it now or it's never getting done
also this is irrelevant to this snippet but i choose to believe in shit eyesight xingqiu who got the teyvat equivalent of contacts and/or lasik eye surgery. he would've needed glasses but he doesn't want to look like an Old Man!!!! (baizhu: ._. )
#hoyo when will i see him/them again..... in my xqht maining era (< in terms of blorbo meter as well as gameplay)#WHEN WILL I SEE FANART OF THEM AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP im so ill#you should absolutely read this as xq slumped on his desk with white rectangle eyes and a little ghost spirit xq hanging out of his mouth#and the bg has those manga lines of doom and despair behind him#he's so me when im trying to finish my hw the night its due btw. and me using up my one remaining braincell to get out of writers block!!!!#xingqiu#hu tao#teyvat thoughts#genshin impact#plum blossom bookmark#SOOOOOOOO dead about this actually when will i see my son and my daughter in someone elses stuff....... whennnnnnn i can't subsist#on crumbs forever sigh. is it time to crawl thru ao3? is it?#irrelevant but also i was holding myself back from saying 'that's so crazy' at least thrice in the notes. ily author boy go write ur#weeb scifi novel i will support the next volume wholeheartedly (ht will support the next volume with teasing and critique)#also i want to shake genshin because what do you MEAN part of the chinese title was xq's old pen name before they changed it#his self insert novel doing numbers /JJJJJJJJJ
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Yup, im fine. I'm totally fine.
Fuck..I can't do this. I'm not strong enough..
I..I failed my math exam. I got..a..13..
I thought I ate up that math exam but in reality I'm the one who got eaten. That math exam ate my sanity, mental health, physical health, endurance, dignity, hope, braincell and left no crumbs.
#yourfavepookiebear#math#exam#mathematics#math exam#fuck im not strong enough#crying screaming throwing up#crying screaming sliding down the wall#banging my head on my desk#srsly#ive lost the battle#Retreat soldiers#we have lost the battle#we shall come back another day to get pur revenge but for now just retreat
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2019 / 2023
#the dreamer // the dream etc etc etc#im being so normal at work rn#im not im gonna throw up blood im screaming crying at my desk
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Alright tomorrow (or, well, today now, I suppose) I am FINISHING THE CHAPTER I'VE BEEN WORKING ON. I've got one scene left of it. And then I can write the third chapter in this section and I will feel way better.
#even though the next section is like. ugggggh I don't wanna. I do but I don't.#writing the first half of the fucked up book just doing tension building is like. whyyyyy#screaming crying throwing up climbing under my desk#tbh I complain now but I will complain just as much when I get to the second half and I have to like. deliver on shit. fuck#however it is going WELL so it's fine. it's cool it's fine I'm good#megs is writing#I promise this time!#I am GOING TO FINISH THIS FUCKING BOOK BEFORE THE END OF THE SUMMER GODDAMMIT#and then I can write other things. also I need to write a novella but that involves some notes.#and I wanted to write a short story for a submission! AUGH FUCK#I really do need to also write some fic or the blorbos will drive me nuts. anyway.
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Me vs outlining a perfect plan for my day in my head which I can be the only one allowed to change the schedule vs my mom asking me to do 2 simple tasks
#she was like hey can you take the trash out I was like ughhhh okay yeah give me a min (I was still ordering weed)#my mom less than a minute later : hey if you want to break down all the cardboard out there Iâd appreciate it Me: actually Iâd rather not I#was about to shower right after I put this weed order in#then she gets all pissed at me bc I never do what she asks and blah blah blah blah blah#like. girl. I know she canât see in my brain but I was not awake last night watching cleaning videos and psyching myself up for a day full#of cleaning my room and showering and doing laundry and cleaning funks cage and doobs cage and making my bed and dusting my ceiling fan and#taking apart my box fan to clean it and cleaning the water pitcher in the fridge and deep cleaning#like GAH I HAVE SO MANY PLANS TODAY WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DO NOTHING AND JUST SIT ON MY ASS SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP#ripping my hair out and screaming banging my fists on the floor#I literally was like yeah Iâll take the trash out no I will not break down boxes right now and she went off on a whole fucking thing like#just shut up.#I hate it. why do I make plans in my head of the exact order I have to do things and if one person suggest doing anything differently or#pushing my schedule back further than I wanted to myself I get so annoyed I explode into a ball of flames#I wanted to shower dry off pick up weed let out funk refill the humidifier clean the bathroom mirrors throw sort and clean the bathroom#shelves sweep start a load of laundry clean off my desk which means cleaning and organizing my closet or my desk dresser thing to fit the#crap on my desk and I have to clean and reorganize the space next to my desk so I can fit my boombox there bc the humidifier took its place#next to funk and like I want to just cry why does everything have to be so fucking difficult for me why is everything simple for everyone#else and for me every simple task is composed of one million baby tasks that I have to do in the correct order forever or everyone around m#will think Iâm stupid and dumb forever like WHAT THE HELL WHY IS IT SO EASY FOR EVERYONE ELSE IN MY LIFE WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU JUST DO THING#IN WHATEVER ORDER AND IT DOESNT MATTER WHAT DO YOU MEAN A 20 MINUTE SETBACK DOESNT COMPLETELY RUIN YOUR DAY#AHHHHHHHHHH I WANT TO RIP MY HAIR OUT#BUT INSTEAD. I WILL GO TAKE THE TRASH OUT. AND NOT BREAK DOWN THE CARDBOARD BC THAT MEANS GETTING MY KNIFE AND MY HEADPHONES AND PUTTING MO#CLOTHES ON WHICH IS COUNTERINTUITIVE#TO THE WHOLE ABOUT TO TAKE A SHOWER THING#UGHHHHHHH#I am the worst human on the planet and I deserve infinite suffering#fuck this whole thing Iâm pissed Iâm gonna listen to music and rage clean after I pick up weed and shower
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agony writhing agony blood and guts and stuff
#june lsat scores were released#and i KNEW it was going to be bad with all the technical problems but... jesus christ#i was going to have to retake anyways but :(((((((((#blueprint was such shit too so i need to actually figure out how to study effectively#because their 'drilling' model just. didnt fuckin help me on logic games at all#part of me is just tempted to wait until 2024 and see if they remove the lg section entirely#part of me knows thats dumb#ugh im just. so sad and tired.#studying made me such a husk of a person last time and now i have to do it again. agony.#crying screaming throwing up wailing pounding the floor [sitting silently at my desk]
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roll top desk manifestation hour
#$25 for the most beautiful desk ive ever seen#but alas my little kia is too small to bring her home#screaming crying throwing up etc
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Domestic violence needs more attention
I see a lot of anti-hate posts, for example posts against racism, and able-ism, and sexism, and I'm not saying these aren't true, and shouldn't be acknowledged, I'm saying I don't see enough about domestic and parental violence. Now, that might just be because of my followed tags, but still.
Domestic violence often goes unreported, (usually) for one of 3 reasons
The abused has no one to tell, or anywhere to go
The abused is afraid that if they tell someone, that someone won't do anything, OR tell a superior, or a person of authority who then brings it up with the abuser(s), and their abuser(s) will find out, and will punish them for it
The abused doesn't have enough confidence, self-worth, and/or is too afraid to tell the authorities Seriously. this topic needs to be discussed more. I haven't seen anyone, not News channels, not Social medias, no Articles, nobody, talk about this.
#I bring this up for a reason#unfortunately#I was a victim to Domestic abuse#I was often heavily punished for small issues#such as#not doing the dishwasher#failing to make my bed#having a messy nightstand/desk#or getting anything under a 85%/B/2#Doing something afterschool with some of my friends without telling#my parents.#for me it was my mother who abused me#She would often throw things at me#hoping to hit me with that item.#fortunately my father often stopped her before it escalated#UNfortunately he often didn't get home before my mother#I had daily crying fits#and when i had those#my mom would scream at me#telling me to stop because it wasn't pretty#and that I was almost (next age)#and because i was so old and mature that#i shouldnt cry.#I had friends#who i trusted enough to tell them#i told them the day after she threw a knife at me#and i had a temporary scar on my back#I showed them the scar#and one of them#did absolutely nothing.
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This is an anti-work mentality blog for real
#Iâm going to claw my eyes out at my desk today#I want to go home I donât want to work why am I here so much and canât afford my rent Iâm gonna cry and throw up#like ask me to do one more thing and I WILL throw up and scream for real#personal
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