#scottie is mentioned and belongs to jay

[androidcharles]

Rocking the House Chapter 1

Filler time! For those who weren't aware, the first five chapters of Defeating the Androids has been changed to Act 1 (for those who are afraid of a housetrapped situation, there will only be one more act, the finale after these potentially three filler stories) This first one revolves around Charles starting a band with Dave and Amelia starting a band! But before that, Amelia has a confession to make... a really big one!

Under the read more! Read it!

Amelia let out a small groan as she pushed her way out of the store, the shopkeeper calling out to “Come again” in a fake cheery voice. She had been tasked by Scottie, the head Toppat chef, to bring back some spices from the store. Since they had greenhouses that grew vegetables and fruits and anything else they just got delivered, they had to actually go into town to buy them.

Most of the time they “borrowed” it, but her father insisted on making sure they at least had a good image. Amelia let out a small sigh as she tried to balance the bags to carry them back to the car. June was starting to prove that it had teeth to bare, as the heat bared down on her like needles. She hated it because her nanites had to work overtime to keep herself cool.

“Geez, a perfect lady such as myself shouldn’t be subjected to this,” Amelia muttered as she tried not to drop the bags.

“You’re absolutely right, you know.” Amelia jumped a bit as she carefully turned around, looking to see Dave standing behind her, smiling gently.

“Ah, well, I’m just saying that you know… do you want any help with your bags?” Dave said.

“Uh, well, I… I was just being hypothetical you know! I’m far from perfect,” Amelia said.

“Well, you know, I was just hoping that maybe I could help you carry one of your bags? I mean, I don’t mind. If I get caught, I guess you can… um…”

“They aren’t hot, I actually paid for them, you know,” Amelia said, “But I’d love some help carrying them. If it’s… not too much trouble.”

“Of course!” Dave said, grabbing two of the bags. Amelia felt her inseams steaming a bit as she took the other two bags in her arms, feeling herself getting a bit dizzy as she led Dave to the car, helping her set everything in the trunk.

“Well, that should be it. Did you drive this car?” Dave asked.

“Oh no, I can’t drive. Dad says I have… problems…” Amelia glanced to the side as she said this, before she noticed that her driver was missing.

“Huh, what the heck?” Amelia said, “Where did Jacob and Pinkman go…”

“C’mon, Amelia, we gotta go!!”

“Huh?” Amelia turned to see Jacob and Pinkman running towards the car, a couple of bags of stolen notes in their hands. Pinkman quickly opened the trunk and deposited the cash as Amelia stomped her foot.

“YOU GUYS WENT AND ROBBED A BANK WITHOUT ME!? NO FAIR!!” Amelia shouted.

“DOESN’T MATTER, C’MON, THE COPS ARE ON OUR TAIL, WE HAVE TO GOOOO!!” Jacob shouted as Amelia jumped into the car.

“Ah, bye Dave, see ya later!” Amelia shouted.

“WAIT! No witnesses…” Pinkman shouted, reaching over to grab Dave. Jacob suddenly grabbed him and hoisted him into the car.

“NO TIME! That guys timid as hell anyway, what’s he gonna do?! Let’s just go!” Jacob shouted as they sped away. Dave ducked into an alleyway as the cops turned the corner. He hid behind a trashcan, counting the seconds until the shouting suddenly went away and he heard sirens in the distance before letting out a small sigh.

“For a princess, she sure gets in a lot of trouble…” Dave said softly, coming out of the alleyway and heading towards his next destination.

Meanwhile, in the getaway car, Amelia was pouting a bit.

“C’mon Amelia, you said you would take care of the groceries. Plus me and Jacob thought we could make up for some of the extra funds that you spent, you know,” Pinkman said, “Too bad we had to leave that witness though…”

“It’s fine. I’m pretty sure Dave found a hiding spot,” Jacob said.

“Whatever. I still can’t believe you guys did something fun while I had to do the boring shopping,” Amelia muttered.

“The princess is pouting…” Pinkman teased.

“Ah, she’s just like this all the time, huh?” Jacob said.

“Shut up, you two!” Amelia shouted.

“What were you talking to Dave about anyway?” Jacob asked, “You looked pretty nervous when you were talking to him.”

“N-nothing!” Amelia said, “He asked me if I could drive and… well…”

“You?!? Driving?!? Let’s see, what’s the current ransom for teaching you again?” Pinkman asked.

“I think it was ten billion notes last time I checked,” Jacob said, “But I’m new to the clan, so that could have been a rumor I heard.”

“Man, I could have sworn it was five billion. Reg must be getting desperate,” Pinkman said, stretching, “Well, let’s head home and deposit our loot, ill gotten or otherwise!”

Pinkman parked the car in the garage, taking out Amelia’s groceries and the bags of money.

“I’m gonna deposit all this in the safe. Jacob, you help Amelia get that to the kitchen and put that away," Pinkman said. The two them nodded their heads as they headed to the kitchen, Jacob chuckling to himself.

“We should get something to eat after this. What are you having for lunch Amelia?” Jacob asked.

“Uh, probably roast beef sandwiches with a salad. A salad with olives, tomatoes, paper clips and… ah what else sounds good…” Amelia said, sighing a bit.

“Ah, well that sounds… nice I guess…” Jacob said, “Roast beef sandwiches sound good. How about we eat in the garden today? It’s a pretty nice day.”

“This is a nice day to you Jacob? It’s hell for me!”

“Ah, it’s because you’re a princess right?” Jacob teased.

“No, it’s common sense. I’m a computer, so I overheat easy, especially on hot days like this. I usually do heists farther up north if I’m gonna be out and about… ah, I miss New Stick City and Manhattan so much…” Amelia said as she set the groceries on the counter. The two them than entered the kitchen and got to work organizing the spices, making sure everything was in the right place and putting the older spices in front of the newer ones.

“Ah, so that’s where you guys were before everything happened, huh…” Jacob said, “I’m sort of jealous. I heard New Stick City is a pretty exciting place to live.”

“It has it’s ups and downs, I suppose,” Amelia said.

“So, what were you really talking to Dave about?” Jacob teased, poking Amelia’s cheek.

“Ah, this again? Seriously?!” Amelia shouted, stomping out of the kitchen in a huff as Jacob followed her, laughing a bit.

“Man, you sound just like my younger cousin. She got all pissy when I made fun of her crushes too,” Jacob said.

“It’s not a crush, it’s just…” Amelia glanced to the side as she placed her order and put it in the inbox.

“I mean, what’s wrong with liking him, you know?” Amelia said.

“That’s an awful lot of roast beef sandwiches you just ordered…” Jacob said.

“I’m thinking of bringing some to Harold and Ezhno down in the archives. They get so caught up in their work, they sometimes forget to eat you know,” Amelia said.

“Ah, that’s true,” Jacob said as he placed his own order. The two sat in the cafeteria to wait while they talked about other things until their order was brought out.

“Alright, let’s get these sandwiches down to the archives,” Amelia said, taking the platter carefully as Jacob followed behind her.

“This is super nice of you,” Jacob said.

“I just need to distract myself for a bit,” Amelia said, “I have to set a good example for the clan after all.”

“Wow…” Jacob said, “You shouldn’t over exert yourself too much, you know. You’re going to hurt yourself.”

“It’s fine. I can go for about twenty four hours without having to boot up into sleep mode,” Amelia said, “And I usually sleep for about eight hours… but Charles…”

“Charles?” Amelia let out a small sigh as Jacob tipped his head to the side.

“Without military discipline, he seems to be getting close to about ten to eleven hours of sleep. What kind of dreams does he have, I wonder? Maybe it’s a bug?” Amelia said, “Maybe those backwards scientists back in Project SAI were onto something when they declared him defective...”

“Or maybe he just likes sleeping? I tend to sleep in every now and again,” Jacob said weakly.

Amelia hummed as she tilted her head to have Jacob open the door for her. They walked in, making their way through the maze of curved bookshelves until they eventually reached the middle of the room, where Ezhno was currently absorbed in his work. Harold (or Handsome Harold as he was commonly called) was there as well, sorting through a couple of files.

“Harold, do you have any references for this bank here?” Ezhno asked.

“Hm… let’s see… there might be a file or two on that bank in the back or… oh Amelia!” Harold said, “Hello there! You know, I have a few files that might go good on those sandwiches you brought…”

“Well, I brought enough for everyone,” Amelia said, “Ezhno, how long has it been since you’ve eaten?”

“I… ate a granola bar earlier…” Ezhno said.

“That’s not good…” Jacob muttered, “Hey, move the papers over, I wanna eat.”

“Here, Amelia, these files need to ‘disappear.’ If you know what I mean,” Harold said, setting some papers on the table and winking.

“Ah, sure thank you,” Amelia said, folding the papers and putting them between a few sandwiches, “I’m pretty sure you can squeeze in some time to eat. C’mon Ezhno, a granola bar isn’t enough for you humans.”

“Ah, well, I guess I can step away from work for a little bit,” Ezhno said as Harold took a sandwich himself.

“Ah, man I have so much work to do after all these. I have to admit, Pinkman is actually a pretty harsh mentor. I thought he was pretty easygoing around everyone, but he tends to be pretty pushy around me,” Jacob said, taking a bite of his own meal.

“Well, it’s because he wants you to be the best to the clan that you can be you know,” Harold said, “After all, the Toppat Clan has to remain on top!”

“Hmm…” Jacob placed his elbow on the table, causing Amelia to flinch a little.

“Actually, I was thinking about joining the detectives division once I get my basic training out of the way. I heard they do cool stuff, plus it’s not any different than the work I did before,” Jacob said.

“The detectives division is full of snobs though,” Ezhno muttered.

“Ah, they’re not all snobs! They’re just dedicated! Like Bloodhound for instance! He’s super good at chasing down crooks!” Amelia said.

“It’s too bad we have to turn them in now. Back than, we were pretty good about faking the death of those souls and of course allowing them a place in our clan. But now we have to worry about our PR,” Harold said.

“Is that why dad’s been stressed out lately… ah jeez…” Amelia let out a sigh, wishing she could help a bit more. But her dad had told her that it was higher up business now and she should take advantage of the punishment she had received to relax a bit more and act more like a young lady.

Is having a crush like that? Do ladies worry about whether boys like them or not?

“What are you so deep in thought about Amelia?” Ezhno asked. Amelia smiled weakly. It seemed like ever since she had met him, Ezhno was able to read her like a book.

“Well, what do you think, Ezhno?” Amelia said. Ezhno laughed and was about to respond when Jacob pointed with his fork.

“AH! I know! She’s all flustered about her crush!” Jacob shouted.

“Jacob!” Amelia shouted, slamming her hand on the table as Harold laughed a little.

“Ah, so you have a crush on someone! That sounds wonderful! Who is it? Is it someone in the clan? Don’t worry, we won’t tell your father,” Harold said.

“Yeah, we know how he gets when you’re around boys…” Ezhno muttered.

“Oh, well,” Amelia glanced down shyly before looking up again.

“It’s Dave Panpa. You guys probably don’t know him.”

“Dave… Dave, Dave, Dave… that name does ring a bell,” Harold said. Jacob slumped in his seat a bit, trying to avoid eye contact as Ezhno shrugged.

“He was that prisoner we kept here for almost a year. At least until the government broke him out. Remember, after the archives were infiltrated?”

“I don’t need a reminder of that,” Harold muttered, “I can’t believe you have a crush on him!”

“Ah, well, it’s just, he’s just, it’s just…” Amelia stuttered as if trying to come up with a good reason, “You shouldn’t tell my dad OK?! If he found out I liked a boy, he’d go all shotgun mode, trying to find out every little detail about him.”

“And freak him out, too. I mean, the guy is seriously a wimp,” Jacob said, rolling his eyes.

“That’s not true! He can actually be pretty brave when he puts his mind to it! And he’s kind and wonderful and sweet…” Amelia thought back to the incident when Charles was infected with the mega virus the N.E.R.Ds had injected in him.

Amelia approached Dave with a washcloth as he flinched, looking at her nervously.

“Your arm. It’s been bleeding for a while now. I just wanted to clean it up and dress it properly so it doesn’t get infected,” she said softly.

“Ah… fine fine, make it quick,” Dave said. Amelia pulled up his shirt sleeve a little as she started to dab the wound in water, causing the blood to run a bit more as she carefully cleaned it up. Than she dug through the first aid kit, applying the bandage and wrapping it up nicely before nodding her head.

“All done,” Amelia said, “Are you alright? That was quite a fall from the apartment window.”

“Yeah, Henry and Ellie are gonna be pissed if we ever find them. But I think Charles will be more pissed that his piano is broken… he said he got that for Christmas from Santa,” Dave said.

“I’m pretty sure Santa will send him a new one. Like one time I broke something that I got from him and he managed to bring a new to me,” Amelia said, “And it wasn’t even Christmas.” Dave chuckled as he smiled at her gently. Amelia felt herself overheating at his smile as she waited for Burt to get done with preparations.

“There she goes staring into space again,” Ezhno said.

“Shut up!” Amelia said, her inseams steaming up once again.

“I guess I really haven’t seen him action, huh?” Jacob said, “Well, maybe you’ll get another chance to talk to him.”

“Yeah, maybe…” Amelia muttered before standing up, “I’m gonna go see if the weapons division needs some help with organizing. We just got a new shipment in and I have a feeling they’re going to need all the help they can get.”

“I, uh… gotta get going too! Can’t miss training, hahaha!” Jacob said, shooting up as well, “Don’t worry about the tray guys, I’ll bring it back to the cafeteria for ya!” He carefully took the remaining sandwiches off the tray before running off with it, obviously in a hurry. Ezhno and Harold exchanged worried glances as they got back to work.

Meanwhile, Jacob was running off the communications division of the manor. He weaved through several Toppats as he finally approached the door, knocking on it as he opened it up.

“Hello?” Jacob said, “Is Burt here?”

“Nah,” he heard a bored voice pipe up. He looked to see the familiar top hat shifting a bit as Burt peered over his computer, smiling at him mischievously.

“What’s that tray for?” Burt asked as he motioned for Jacob to come closer.

“Uh, oh, I forgot to return this uh…” Jacob clutched it tightly before he looked at Burt with determination in his eyes.

“I wanna do something for Amelia!” Jacob said. Burt tipped his head to the side as he narrowed his eyes at Jacob.

- - - - -

Sven glanced down the alleyway, a little nervous as he glanced at Jacob.

“What the heck is the point of all this again!?” Sven whispered sharply as Jacob smiled.

“C’mon, Amelia clearly wants to get to know Dave better, but between her trying to keep herself busy every moment she’s awake, it’s not gonna work out,” Jacob said, “I figured this would be a nice surprise for her.

“I would say kidnapping him seems like the worst idea, but than again, this is what we do best,” Sven said, “But won’t it look bad if we just kidnap him for no reason?” Jacob shrugged.

“We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it.” Jacob gazed down the street and looked to see Dave heading down the sidewalk, listening to Rupert ramble on and on about something. Great, they would have to do something about him. He could have sworn he looked familiar, but he shook the thought from his head as he gazed at Dave.

“Alright, so you know the plan, right?”

“What about that guy?”

“Don’t worry, hopefully things will work out.”

“Than you distract him while I grab Dave.” Jacob burst out from the alleyway, smiling as Rupert flinched, running towards him. Jacob instinctively ran away as Dave wrung his hands together nervously, wondering if he should run too. Sven creeped out of the alleyway and grabbed Dave, causing him to shout a little as Rupert turned around to notice that Dave was being captured.

“NOT THIS TIME!” Rupert shouted, grabbing some pepper spray. But he was suddenly overtaken by Jacob as he jumped onto Rupert’s back, grabbing the pepper spray and spraying it directly into Rupert’s eyes. A couple of bystanders stared worriedly as Jacob followed Sven back into the alleyway, Dave knocked unconscious as Rupert knelt down on the ground, cringing from the sharp stinging in his eyes.

“Damn… damn it damn it damn it ALL TO HELL!” Rupert shouted as a couple of passersby tried to help him.

- - - - -

Dave had just woken up in one of the guest rooms of the Toppat Manor about an hour ago and was now pacing the floor, trying to assess his situation. He wasn’t always the best when it came to other circumstances, but he was a master of escape… at least in his own mind. He wanted to be as excellent as Henry, but right now, he had to consider his options.

Going out the door wouldn’t work. If he heard correctly, there was a guard out there and of course picking the lock to be faced with a brutish dude who he probably couldn’t take down on his own was not the best option. The window could work, but after gazing out and seeing how high he was, he had to find a way to climb down safely.

Unfortunately, it seemed like they had planned ahead for this as while there were curtains, they were far too flimsy to make into rope and the bed sheets on the bed had been completely stripped. If he had the strength he could probably jury rig a makeshift landing spot with a trampoline, a couple of cushions from the two chairs, the throw pillows, and of course the pillows themselves, but he didn’t trust his luck with hitting the mark. Especially considering how far up he was. He was on the fourth floor of the manor, so it would be a miracle if he managed to get off with a broken leg.

And even than, where would he go? It was very clear he was in the middle of nowhere. He could see Lake Mesa off in the distance, not too far from their general location, but far enough to where a hike to a campsite near the area would take a toll on him.

So what was left? The vent was too small to crawl through, even if he had the tools to pry it open and the bathroom was devoid of anything he could use as a weapon in case he needed to get past the guard (there was no plunger, which severely disappointed him).

So he had to consider his next best option. Wait… and hope. He felt a surge of panic wash over him as he realized this, sitting down on the bed and bringing his head up to his knees. Wait and hope… the same thing he had told himself over and over again as he was locked up in the airship, wishing and wishing for someone, anyone to save him.

He let out a sort of shuddered sigh as he tried to stay calm, not worrying about the camera or the fact that the Toppats who were watching him were probably making fun of him.

Luckily that wasn’t the case. From the communications room, Burt could only glare at Sven as he shrunk back a bit, trying not to be seen.

“Maybe this was a bad idea…” Jacob whispered as Ezhno peered over the monitor, trying to get a good look at what was happening. Keegan, Ezhno’s roommate, chirped a bit, tipping his head to the side as Burt started to type a message on the other monitor.

“The girls are taking Amelia to the room right now. Than we can watch and see what happens,” Burt said.

“Isn’t this a little… prying? I mean, we really, really shouldn’t be spying on them like this,” Ezhno said. Burt stared at Ezhno, a sort of concerned look in his eyes.

“Amy is like my little sister dude. I have to make sure that scared or not, Dave doesn’t hurt her,” Burt said.

“If he does, that prison cell that he was in is going to feel like a luxury cabin compared the hell I’ll put him through! Jag ska få honom att lida! Helvete!” Sven shouted as Keegan backed up a little, letting out a few concerned chirps as Ezhno reassured him.

“I can only assume you two are here for that reason as well. If you’re bothered by it, you can always leave.” Keegan shook his head while Ezhno shrugged.

“Amelia’s kinda like my little sister too! She kinda reminds me of my younger cousin actually,” Jacob said.

“Ah, she’s going in… I think…” Burt said, leaning forward.

Back in the hall, Carol, Earrings, Matilda Ivy, and the Witch were practically begging Amelia to go in the room.

“C’mon Amelia, it’s OK!” Carol said.

“But my outfit-”

“What you’re wearing is fine! He’ll love it!” Earrings said, pushing her closer.

“C’mon, all you’ve gotta do is talk to him, you talk to the boys around here all the time!” Matilda said as she pushed her further inside.

“But that’s different! This is-!” Suddenly Amelia felt herself levitating a little as she shivered, trying to break free as the Witch used her magic to put Amelia down inside the room before slamming the door shut, locking it tight.

“I’M NOT AFRAID TO BLAST MY WAY OUT OF HERE, YOU JERKS! LET ME GO!” Amelia shouted.

“One hour! That’s all we’re asking darling!” the Witch shouted, “If you hate him, you can message one of us and we’ll be more than happy to let you out!” There was silence on the other side as Amelia let out an exasperated sigh.

“Fine,” Amelia said softly. She looked at Dave, who looked a little afraid as he tried to smile at her.

“Um, hey Amelia. I understand that you’re a Toppat and all but… but… PLEASE DON’T HURT ME!” Dave shouted.

“I’m not gonna hurt you. But if anyone tries to, I’ll deck ‘em,” Amelia muttered, sitting down next to him, “I’m sorry about all this. They could have just asked you to come over. Or I could have invited you over. Or, well, uh…” Amelia’s inseams started to steam a bit as she placed her hand down next to her only to see that it was on top of Dave’s hand. Part of her wanted to flinch away, but the other part wanted to at least hold it for a while longer.

“Yeah, that would have been the more… normal thing to do,” Dave said. The two of them glanced down at the ground as they tried to come up with something to say to fill the awkward air.

In the communications room, Burt was gritting his teeth slightly as Keegan pressed his palms together rapidly, gritting his teeth as Sven clenched his fist.

“C’mon, say something to each other already!!” Sven shouted.

“This really was a bad idea…” Jacob muttered.

“Hold on, let me motivate her,” Burt said, beginning to type on his keyboard.

Amelia suddenly heard a ping in her messenger app and she opened it up, letting out a small groan as she read the message.

Burthalomew9000: What are you waiting for? Talk to him!

GlitterToppatGirl: SHUT

“Are you OK?” Dave asked. Amelia’s inseams steamed as she shook her head.

“I highly doubt they got daddy’s permission to do this…” Amelia muttered, “I’m so sorry about all this. I can understand where these guys are coming from, but I wish they hadn’t done it the way they did…”

“It’s alright!” Dave said, “In all honesty, your presence is actually keeping me calmer. It’s keeping me grounded you know…”

“Thank you,” Amelia said, “I’m glad that’s the case.” Amelia glanced down at Dave smiled at her.

“If you’re worried about what to talk about, than how about I go first? Um… do you um… like… um… oh greater ones above, I don’t…” If Amelia still had a self destruct function, it would be ticking down, he was just so cute!

“I like writing stories,” Amelia said.

“OH! Uh… what kind of stories do you write?” Dave said.

“Um… silly ones…” Amelia said softly.

“They can’t be that silly. Send me what you’ve written, I wanna know,” Dave said, pulling out his phone.

“They didn’t take away your phone?” Amelia said. Dave’s face turned bright red as he slapped his forehead, realizing he could have texted someone to let someone know he was alright.

“DANG IT!!” Dave shouted.

- - - - -

Ellie leaned back against her chair, propping her broken leg up as she scratched at the cast, whining a bit.

“This is so stupid!” Ellie shouted, ���My leg is ITCHY!”

“That cast isn’t coming off until your leg is healed Ellie, that’s how it works,” Charles said, gathering some dishes as he turned on the stove, “Until than, I’ll take care of all the cooking. Along with Henry of course!”

“I think I trust you more than Henry… ugh what I wouldn’t give to be an android like you. If you break your leg, all you have to do is get it fixed up by a scientist. I have to wait for my body to actually think about repairing my bones…” Ellie said.

“Being an android isn’t exactly the best thing in the world…” Charles muttered as he suddenly heard a ping on his messenger.

TheFinalBastion101: EMERGENCY!

xXBold_Action_ManXx: What does the general want?

TheFinalBastion101: NOT THAT! DAVE HAS LITERALLY BEEN KIDNAPPED BY TOPPATS AGAIN!

xXBold_Action_ManXx: Uh, hold on a sec…

Charles flitted through his contacts before pulling up Dave’s message box.

xXBold_Action_ManXx: Hey, Dave, are you alright?

DaveyBoy500: I’m busy!

xXBold_Action_ManXx: Not too busy to text me back I see…

DaveyBoy500: I’m fine! I’m talking to a Toppat right now actually!

xXBold_Action_ManXx: About what exactly?

DaveyBoy500: Nothing much… Is Rupert OK?

Charles flipped back to Rupert’s message box and typed a message.

xXBold_Action_ManXx: Dave’s alright. As far as I can tell. Are you alright?

TheFinalBastion101: I had to spend the past 20 minutes pouring milk into my eyes because one of those darn Toppats pepper sprayed me… But otherwise I’m doing GREAT! 😡

xXBold_Action_ManXx: Got it, I’ll grab Dave than.

He closed the windows, letting out a small sigh as he let Dave know that Rupert was fine and that he was on his way to pick him up.

“HENRY!!” Charles shouted. Henry walked out of the hallway into the kitchen, a dazed look on his face.

“I’ve got some business to take care of. Do you think you can look after Ellie while I’m gone?” Charles asked. Henry nodded his head as he walked over to Ellie, sitting down next to her as he leaned his head against her shoulder.

“Glad to see ya too, Henry. So what’s this business that you need to take care of?” Ellie asked.

“Uh, it’s fine, I think I can handle it!” Charles said, “In the meantime just relax. I’ll bring back something to eat.”

“What happened to cooking?” Ellie asked as Charles started to head out the door.

“Don’t worry about it!” Charles shouted as he slammed the door behind him.

“If it’s Toppats…” Ellie sighed as she leaned her head back, “So, are you hoping that Charles’ idea about being all ‘friendly’ with them will work?”

- - - - -

Charles hovered the helicopter above the Toppat Manor, looking down to see a couple of Toppats already on the roof, talking among themselves. He decided to radio the communications center. If this worked, maybe he could get out of here scott free without any bruises. He located the helipad on top of the building and got to work.

“Hey, this is Charles Calvin, requesting permission to land, over,” Charles said. Luckily, Charles managed to get in contact with one of the Toppats in communications that was Burt, a Toppat by the name of Mikey.

“Uh, hey… who is this? Is this a government vehicle? If you try to land, we will hurt you,” Mikey said, trying to sound intimidating.

“I’m not government… um, maybe I can talk to the leader, if that’s OK?” Charles said, “Look, I just wanna land.”

“Uh, hold on, lemme ask Burt.”

Burt, meanwhile, was watching as Dave and Amelia were laying back in the bed, talking excitedly to each other as the others watched. As happy as they were that they were getting along, they were starting to get bored of them talking and giggling among themselves. There were a few exciting moments where they held hands and Dave got bold enough to even kiss Amelia on the cheek, but in the end they were pretty bored.

“Well, at least he’s not trying anything on her,” Sven said, “But this is really boring.”

“Welcome to my world,” Burt muttered as Keegan leaned on top of Jacob, much to his discomfort.

“Maybe we should just stop watching. I mean-”

“Hey, Burt. Uh, we have a… person named Charles here requesting landing. He said he’s not government, but I’m looking at the cameras and in all honesty, I can’t say I trust him.” Burt jumped, almost spilling his coffee as he glanced at the others, a look of worry on his face.

“What’s going on?” Ezhno asked.

“One of the Triple Threat is here to grab Dave. What should we do?”

“He wants to speak to Reginald…” Mikey said, panicking a little

“Um…” Burt tried to think about the possible options before he suddenly heard another voice over his headphones. It was Charles, obviously getting impatient.

“Hey, Burt. You guys kidnapped Dave and hurt my boyfriend. And while I’m REALLY pissed off about that last part, I don’t to put up a fight. I just wanna talk, so can you put me through to Mr. Copperbottom? Please?” Burt let out a small sigh, taking a sip of his coffee.

“I have no idea who that is,” Burt said in a deadpan voice before hanging up. Charles groaned as he gripped the steering wheel tightly.

“Uh, hey, uh… Mikey was it?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m landing anyway. Once again, not here to fight, I just want to talk. I want to get my friend and get going. I’m not gonna do anything drastic and I’m definitely not gonna crash into your manor. BUT-!” Charles’ voice suddenly got low “-I’m not above self defense…”

“Wait, I can put you through to Mr. Copperbottom, I just need the head of communications permiss-” Charles cut him off as he began to carefully navigate his way down to the rooftop. He landed squarely on the helipad as the two Toppats approached the helicopter, taking a defensive stance as Charles tipped his head to the side. He recognized Carol already and his facial recognition program managed to identify the girl next to her as Annabelle Kensington, AKA The Witch within the clan.

“Hello,” Charles said, “Listen, I don’t want any trouble. I promise.” Carol backed up a bit, but she was still ready to fight.

“I just want to pick up Dave, alright?”

“And what makes you think we’re gonna make it that easy?” Carol shouted.

“I don’t know. Why don’t you see?” Charles said, tipping his head to the side. The Witch rolled her eyes as she flung a huge magic blast at Charles. A strange shield popped up around him as the attack was absorbed within it, causing Charles to vibrate a bit.

“Wow! This is interesting!” Charles shouted, “Very interesting. Let’s see how you like it…”

“Wait, wh-?

Before any of the girls could respond, suddenly Charles aimed his blaster at them, firing the magic attack back full force. The Witch put up a magic shield as Carol hid behind her, gritting her teeth as they looked to see that Charles had managed to do substantial damage to the top of the manor.

“Shit…” Carol said, “OK, look, listen, we only kidnapped Dave because we’re trying to play matchmaker.” Charles tipped his head to the side once again, giggling a bit as he approached them.

“OK, which Toppat has a crush on him?”

“Oh, that’s easy, it’s-”

“WHAT’S GOING ON UP HERE!?!” The three of them flinched as they looked to see the Right Hand Man, standing at the roof’s exit.

“Charles? What are you doing here…” the Right Hand Man, turning his new cybernetic arm into a laser cannon.

“Listen, I don’t want any trouble. I just wanna grab Dave and head home,” Charles said.

“Dave? Who?”

Carol winced as the Witch suddenly tried to hide her face.

“Uh, Dave? You guys kidnapped him again? For no reason other than to play matchmaker apparently?” Charles said. The Right Hand Man transformed his arm back as he glared at Carol and the Witch.

“What’s this all about, than?” the Right Hand Man asked.

“Uh, well, you see, your daughter… she was acting shy around this one guy and one of the Toppats…”

“Jacob!”

“One of the Toppats decided to kidnap Dave so he could talk to her one on one,” Carol explained, cringing a bit.

“Amelia likes someone? How come she didn’t tell us?” the Right Hand Man said softly.

“Maybe it’s because every time a new recruit of the male gender joins, your husband feels the need to threaten them,” the Witch said.

“Can’t help if we want to keep her safe!” the Right Hand Man shouted, “Alright, Charles, give me a second, I’ve gotta call Reg. Just follow me… And as for you two, you and Jacob are in big trouble…”

“Don’t try anything funny…” Charles said as he followed Right Hand Man back into the manor.

“Only if you don’t. Hey Reg, we’ve got a bit of a situation here…”

- - - - -

DontCrossCarol: The mission has been compromised! What do we do?

Burthalomew9000: Nothing. Nothing we can do.

“That’s our cue to leave,” Ezhno said as he grabbed Keegan, who looked a bit disappointed, but he followed nonetheless.

“We were never here!” he shouted as he headed out the door.

“Maybe I should get going too!” Jacob said, starting to sneak away.

“HOLD IT! You talked us into this and now you’re going to take the brunt of the punishment with us!” Sven shouted.

“Oh come on! Dave’s a security guard! The less of him around, the better, right?” Jacob said.

“There’s a form of etiquette the Toppat Clan that we have to follow. You literally kidnapped that guy for no reason…” Burt said, “We can’t have witnesses sure, but that was back when we could actually get away with crimes. I’d say the punishment you’re going to receive is far greater than anything you could ever conceive.”

“Oh nooo… I’m not gonna be kicked out am I?!” Jacob asked.

“No, but I imagine it might have to do with deep cleaning.”

“GREAT! And I’m still considered a new recruit thanks to that punishment a while back!” Sven shouted, “THANKS A LOT! Uuuuugggghhh….” Sven crumpled up as he put his head into his knees.

“Well, at least Amelia finally got over her nerves. She seems to really like Dave now…” Burt said, staring at the screen.

Meanwhile, Reginald was practically yelling on the phone as the Right Hand Man let out a small sigh.

“Love, listen, this wasn’t planned at all. I don’t know how or why it happened, but Charles is here so we might as well-”

“HOW DID ANY OF THIS HAPPEN!? Who was responsible for this!?” Reginald shouted as the Right Hand Man pulled the phone away from him, giving Charles a pleading look as he shrugged.

“Listen, I’m taking Charles to one of our lounges right now. I promise you I’ll have a few Toppats in there to keep an eye on him until we get Dave,” the Right Hand Man said.

“Fine, fine. I’ll go see about my daughter. I don’t believe she had any involvement in this, but I wouldn’t doubt that she’d take advantage of this situation.”

“Alright.” The Right Hand Man hung up the phone, motioning for Charles to follow him into the manor just as he saw Keegan and Ezhno rushing down the hall.

“OI!” The Right Hand Man shouted.

“NOTHING! I mean, yes sir?” Ezhno said nervously.

“You two keep an eye on him. Take him to one of the lounges and watch him carefully. Make sure he doesn’t try anything funny,” the Right Hand Man said.

“Yes sir. Um, and you’re…”

“Charles. That’s all you need to know,” Charles said.

“Cha… Cha-rl…” Keegan tried to say, looking a bit frustrated.

“It’s OK, if you can’t say it properly, just call me CC,” Charles said.

Keegan shook his head, his mouth making a flat little line as he said "No. No."

"Ah, oh, well... how about Char? Like the fish!" Charles suggested.

“Char...” Keegan giggled as he motioned for Charles to follow him. Ezhno followed behind, trying to rush as far away from the Right Hand Man as possible as he started to text Burt, asking for the location of Jacob Rose.

Meanwhile, Reginald was doing the same thing, only he was asking which room Dave and Amelia were in. Heading down the hall with Matilda and Earrings, they lead him to the room that Dave and Amelia currently occupied.

“Any socks?” Matilda said, snickering a little.

“Don’t be gross, Matilda…” Earrings muttered as she knocked on the door.

“Who is it?” Amelia asked as she opened the door.

“Amelia Abigail Copperbottom, what the heck is the meaning of… this…” He looked up to see Dave towering over her behind him and felt a bit intimidated.

“Goodness gracious me, you are taller than I remember…” Reginald muttered, feeling a bit helpless.

“Mr. Copperbottom, I’m sorry if I worried you. I feel like all of this could have been avoided if well… umm…”

“If I had been brave enough to actually talk to Dave to begin with,” Amelia said, her inseams steaming up a bit.

“Well, you were brave! You just needed a little push!” Matilda said, “Sometimes that’s all that matters!”

“Yeah! And since Dave wasn’t hurt and Amelia is still safe, maybe we can-” Earrings started before Reginald gave her a cold stare.

“You two are still in trouble.”

“Darn,” they both said as they headed to Reginald’s office.

“Dave, I think you’ve overstayed your welcome. I’ll call Right and let him know to escort you to the lounge so you can leave at your leisure,” Reginald said.

“Ah, well, that was fun. How about we meet again soon? Say, around seven this Sunday?” Dave asked.

“Oh, uh, definitely! Definitely,” Amelia said, “No promises I won’t try any five finger discounts though.”

“Or a dine and dash?” Dave joked as Amelia giggled. She motioned for him to lean down so she could plant a kiss on his cheek as Earrings and Maltilda jumped at the loud THUD they heard.

“What happened?” the Right Hand Man shouted, rushing down the hall to check on his husband, who had passed out on the floor.

“Ah, well…” Matilda said softly, rubbing the back of her head.

“AMELIA’S GOT A BOYFRIEND!” Earrings shouted. Amelia hid her face in her hands as Dave turned bright red, trying to not be seen as the Right Hand Man gave him the most hard look in the world.

- - - - -

It took about a few minutes, but eventually Dave was reunited with Charles, who was more than happy to leave the lounge he was forced to wait in. The only pleasant person there was Keegan, but even than he could tell he was getting a hard look from him. Everyone else practically either pretended he didn’t exist or gave him a glare so sour, he was getting viruses in his programming just from them alone.

He paid no mind to it as he headed to the roof to retrieve his helicopter, doing a full scan of it to ensure that nothing important was taken in the thirty minutes he had spent on this excursion.

“Be careful going back. Don’t be afraid to take shortcuts!” Reginald said as they were escorted to the roof.

“Sorry about all this. If you don’t want me to-”

“I think it’s for the best that Amelia starts growing up a little, don’t you think Reg?” the Right Hand Man said. Charles perked up a bit when he heard this, feeling a strange sense of deja vu as Reginald nodded his head in agreement.

“I suppose so… she can’t our little princess forever…” Reginald said, “That being said…” Reginald grabbed Dave’s shirt and pulled him down to his level, his stare quite cold and determined.

“If you do anything and I mean anything to hurt my sweet little girl, I can guarantee you that the cell you spent almost a year in will be a luxury paradise compared to the hell I’ll put you through!” he whispered softly, a wicked grin on his face as Dave nodded his head rapidly, backing away as Reginald and the Right Hand Man waved at them.

As soon as Dave was secure, Charles lifted off, doing his best to get the heck out of dodge.

In about an hour, he landed back on top of his apartment building, looking back at Dave, who seemed a bit shaken up.

“Are you OK? Did Reginald shotgun dad you?” Charles asked.

“Yeah, definitely…” Dave said, “Amelia’s alright, but the Toppats still kinda scare me a little bit… I guess I’ll have to start really getting over my fears if I wanna date Amelia.”

“Hey, it’s alright,” Charles said, “If you’re that worried, you don’t have to always meet at the manor, you know.”

“It’s fine. I’ll never get over my fears if I keep hiding away. I’ll never be brave like you or tough like Ellie or as clever as Henry if I don’t try. I’ve spent my whole life skating by by hiding behind somebody. It’s time for me to be a little braver. Starting now, I’m a whole new Dave!” He strutted out of the helicopter before letting out a high pitched scream and running back in.

“What’s wrong now?” Charles asked.

“There’s a wasp out there!” Charles shook his head, chuckling as he turned his arm into a blaster.

“Well, it’s a good thing I have a plasma cannon!”

“NO WAIT, CHARLES DON’T KILL HIM, JUST LURE HIM AWAY!” Dave rushed out of the helicopter after him as Charles rushed out the door.

- - - - -

Amelia plucked at the strings of her bass guitar as she sat in the office with her dad and papa. She had acquired it in a heist about two months and had started taking lessons from Burt, who was more than happy to show her the ropes. Thanks to a couple of Youtube videos and Burt’s sort of laid back teaching style, she was starting to slowly but surely become a master of the instrument.

She wanted to at least show her dads what she had been learning and while they were very busy, they were happy to listen to her while they worked. She let out a small sigh as she looked up at them, stopping for second.

“I’m sorry about all this,” Amelia said, “I should have know that this was going to happen…”

“Well, I don’t exactly blame you for keeping your little crush a secret. After all, every time you so much as bring up dating anybody, I get a sort of head rush,” Reginald said, sitting down next to her.

“Why’s that?” Amelia asked.

“Well, it’s just that… I know that you were technically built to be an adult android or whatever, despite your age, but in the end, I always saw you as my little princess, you know,” Reginald said, ruffling her hair a bit, “And in a way, I wanted you to stay that way. I guess I should have known that under my nose you were growing up. You had to be all on your own for over half a year without us… that must have been devastating…”

“Well, Burt was there,” Amelia said, “But yeah, I was… kinda on my own.”

“I’m not saying you’re all grown up now and all that, but… I really hoped that I could keep putting it off you know,” Reginald said. Amelia looked up to see tears in his eyes as she flinched. She looked to the Right Hand Man, who was trying to concentrate on his work, but even his eyes were a bit wet.

“I’m always gonna be your little princess you know. Nothing will ever change that,” Amelia said, “I have a feeling that you’re going to rag down whoever I end up marrying though.”

“No, you know what I’ll do when you eventually get married?” Reginald said, “I’ll take one look at your in your wedding dress and I’ll cry with joy, because than I’ll know that I raised you right and I’ll be so, so, so proud of you.” Amelia felt herself overheating with joy as she hugged her dad tightly. The Right Hand Man came over to join them and soon they were in a big group hug.

“We love you a lot princess. Just promise us if Dave gives you a hard time, you’ll come to us?” the Right Hand Man said.

“To be honest, he’s kind of meek, but… he’s a really sweet guy who’s really smart and kind and gentle…” Amelia said.

“I think that’s why I preferred to scare those new recruits. Because I would rather you pick someone you want to date rather than someone else deciding you’re good enough for them,” Reginald said. Amelia nodded her head as she smiled.

“So, since I’m technically grown up now… do you think I could get a body modification?” Amelia said.

“Amelia, bigger breasts won’t make him like you more. He’ll stare at your chest so much he’ll burn a hole in it,” Reginald scolded.

“And than I’ll burn a hole in him…” the Right Hand Man growled.

“No, no, not that. I want to be a little taller. I look like a twelve year old in the wrong light and I really don’t want that to be a thing anymore. Please please please! Just a few inches!” Amelia begged.

“Well, how about we call Dr. Vinschpinsilstien first thing tomorrow morning and we’ll see about getting you those extra few inches?” Reginald said. When Amelia nodded her head eagerly, he planted a soft kiss on top her head.

“Good girl. Well, how about we get back to work, Right?” Reginald said, standing up to stretch. The Right Hand Man only let out a small groan as he stood up.

“Are you sure you guys don’t mind if I play?” Amelia said.

“You’ve worked so hard and you want us to hear, right? If we’re annoyed, we’ll let you know, I promise,” Reginald said.

“What you were playing earlier was alright, sweetheart. Do you know anything by Dim Lighthouses? They’re my favorite band,” the Right Hand Man said. Amelia nodded her head, recalling listening to a few songs online while she was practicing her bass. She began to tune her instrument again before starting to play again.

[jaytoons7]

Time to ramble about Martin Strickland, AKA the bastard man!

Oddly enough, I actually have a lot of ideas for him. He's scum, But he's very fun to write for!

TWs: Abuse (Both psychological and physical), Transphobia, Sexism, Murder, Mentions of a car crash This man might as well be a walking content warning

General Info:

The Stricklands weren't always evil rich bastards. Martin's grandparents moved to the US from Ireland, Made a fortune, And got corrupted by capitalism. It stuck for future generations.

His parents were definitely not good people either. Martin just took that shittiness to the next level as he grew up.

He's cishet.

He's both transphobic and lowkey sexist.

The Past:

He went to college to study business. There he met two people, Aria Meadows and Jayden Foxglove (Jay's birth parent. Note: He used he/him and she/her pronouns).

The three became an odd friend group, Although it definitely felt like Martin was third wheeling Aria and Jayden's friendship.

Years went by and the three grew distant once college ended. Martin inherited both his family's wealth and manor. He eventually got married with only the idea of having future heirs in mind.

Once his youngest child was a year old, News went around about a pendant with unnatural abilities. He was determined to get his hands on it.

What he didn't expect was for Aria to already be there. She was on a mission to get the pendant as well. But she also learned about the Strickland's greedy desires and Martin's willingness to keep that family greed alive. She would not let someone with that much darkness in his heart get his hands on this power.

That's when Martin no longer saw Aria as an old friend, But as a threat to his power. So he killed her, Effectively destroying any good he had left in him.

Out of nowhere, Jayden suddenly attacked him. She wasn't a Music Dragon like Aria, But he went with her on this mission due to being friends with her. Out of pure grief and rage, Jayden left the scars on Martin's face.

Martin did manage to get the pendant, But left in a weakened state. Shortly after that, Jayden mysteriously disappeared, With her child being found by James and Hollie Benson.

Family and Business:

Martin had three biological children (Lynnette, Marianne, and Scottie), All AFAB. But he wanted a man and only a man to inherit his wealth. So he took in Benz Rodriguez (Belongs to @capturecharlesau).

Benz was considered the favorite child out of the four. Scottie on the other hand was considered the "black sheep" of the family.

Scottie could not keep up with Martin's impossible standards. While his abuse towards them started out verbal and emotional when they were a kid, They quickly became more physical as Scottie became a teenager once he learned they were nonbinary.

While Martin mostly used his ring hand, He also used wooden rulers when he was feeling extra ruthless...

Speaking of ruthless, He did many morally bankrupt things to keep his wealth growing, As well as to keep people quiet. Blackmail, Extortion, Even murder. Nothing was too low for him.

He likely talked to people like Vivian Arc (Belongs to @bluetorchsky) and Mr. Allwork (Belongs to @capturecharlesau) at least a few times because rich people business and all that.

Once Scottie was 17, They finally had enough of the abuse and ran away from home. Benz left shortly after to create his own path separate from his father.

Martin's Fate:

During the events of Shifted Timeline, Scottie tells Hazel Juniper about the Stricklands to avoid her writing about the Toppats. This was enough to cause an investigation.

Martin's horrid acts were exposed and he was ruined. His wife divorced him, Not because she was any better, But because she only married him for his wealth and she didn't want to get involved in his scandal.

Lynnette and Marianne also left home to go find both Benz and Scottie.

Martin was left with nobody and everybody now knew what he did. The last time he was seen, Was when he was found dead in his crashed car. After investigation, It was revealed that his brakes were cut. It was not an accident...

[wank127]

songs that make me think of denki!!

(btw my top artist for spotify this year was ben platt and for apple replay(yes i use both shh) it was cavetown which is so funny to me, like, was i okay??)

also, warning: it’s kind of a lot and it’s not even half of them lmao

ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ

✨honorable mentions✨:

man or muppet- the muppets (i like to think that denki and mina sang it together at a talent show)

the boys are back in town- yung gravy(i’m not typing all the other names out) (just,, denki, kiri, sero and bakugou,,,)

the ballad of sara berry- 35MM (denki as sara, bakugou the main one singing, midoriya as julie jenkins, shinsou(or y’know, whoever) as his boyfriend, that kinda stuff)

ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ

screw loose- cry baby (ik ik it’s iffy but it’s honestly such a good song)

share your address- ben platt (just,, him being in love and jammin out in his room is all)

invitation- ashnikko ft. kodie shane

bust your windows- jazmine sullivan

daddy issues- the neighborhood

my hair- ariana grande (i just feel like he has such soft hair y’know?)

babooshka- kate bush

last resort- papa roach (no thoughts just him fucking shreddin it on the guitar)

halloweenie(1,2&3)- ashnikko

obvious- ariana grande

vienna- specifically ben platt’s cover

copy cat- melanie martinez ft. tierra whack

higher school sweethearts- melanie martinez

34+35- ariana grande

run- will jay

love language- ariana grande

exit music (for a film)- radiohead

chiquita- ABBA

dumb blonde- avril lavigne ft. nicki minaj (cmon, it’s a given)

positions- ariana grande (the whole album just gives me denki vibes)

hell of a ride- bo burnham

juice- lizzo

daddy af- slayyyter

rock me- one direction (fucking headbanger ngl)

back to black- amy winehouse

achilles come down- gang of youths

sway with me- saweetie & GALXARA

tantrum- ashnikko

my future- billie eilish

love me like there’s no tomorrow- freddie mercury

money, money, money- ABBA

wreak havoc- skylar grey

moonlight- ariana grande

the good side- troye sivan

teenage dirtbag- wheatus

tungs- the frights

best friend- rex orange county

donttrustme- 3OH!3

lullaby- scotty sire ft. liANA

no time to die- billie eilish

cry baby- melanie martinez

coffee breath- sofia mills

lucky- jason mraz & colbie caillat

pov- ariana grande

rehab- amy winehouse

guiltless- dodie

always- P!ATD

i need control- will jay

beachboy- mccafferty

circus- britney spears

sugar-baby goth ft. wiz khalifa

angel eyes- ABBA

everybody talks- neon trees

my heart belongs to daddy- ariana grande cover

love of my life- queen

comfort crowd- conan gray

wasting time- calpurnia

won’t bite- doja cat ft. smino

when he sees me- waitress

chanel- frank ocean

dear maria, count me in- all time low

dance, dance- fall out boy

i’m breaking down- falsettos

puttin’ on the ritz- taco

this is america- childish gambino (idk why either lmao)

leave me lonely- ariana grande ft. macy gray

class fight- melanie martinez

boys like you- dodie

strawberry blonde- mistki

WHEN I WAS OLDER- billie eilish

do it all the time- I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME

make the grade- jack conte

the boys are back- high school musical

new friends- maty noyes

16/04/16 (jacks song)- cavetown

gingerbread man- melanie martinez

strawberry fields forever- the beatles

i’m the middle- dodie

figured out- ashe

american idiot- green day

smithereens- twenty one pilots

noise in my head- cavetown

strawberry shortcake- melanie martinez

self control- frank ocean/cavetown cover

listen before i go- billie eilish

sick of losing soulmates- dodie

hi, it’s me- ashnikko

burned out- dodie

don’t stop me now-queen

show & tell- melanie martinez

you can put your dukes down, stringbean- teddy hyde

i love you- billie eilish

myself- bazzi

drunk with my friends- ashnikko

drama club- melanie martinez

dear- cavetown

big girl(you are beautiful)- MIKA

little boy- ashnikko

numbers- melanie martinez

apocalypse please- muse

juicy- doja cat

want to want me- jason derulo

driver’s license- olivia rodrigo(ik it’s everywhere but omg heartbroken denki-)

bottom- mccafferty

toxic- ashnikko

thank you for the music- ABBA

never shut up again- heathers(west end)

kevin- andrew rannels/joe iconis

a million men- melanie martinez(unreleased)

get well soon- ariana grande

good while it lasted- ashnikko

slipping through my fingers- ABBA

deal with it- ashnikko (feat. kelis)

training wheels- melanie martinez

fight like a girl- ashnikko

good old-fashioned lover boy- queen

IV. sweatpants- childish gambino

jason’s song- ariana grande

watcha say- jason derulo

i hate everything about you- three days grace

rant- bo burnham

cuz i love you- lizzo

honestly anything by bo burnham

L8r boi- ashnikko

piggyback- melanie martinez(unreleased)

carolina- harry styles

sugar baby- meghan thee stallion

off the goop- yung gravy, bbno$ & cuco

killer queen- queen

slumber party- ashnikko ft. princess nokia

hotel california- eagles

umbrella- rihanna ft. jay z

stand tall- childish gambino

throat baby(go baby)- BRS kash, DaBaby & city girls

like a girl- lizzo (fem denki holds so much power)

can’t remember to forget you- shakira ft. rihanna

boom boom pow- black eyed peas

grace kelly- MIKA

popular song- ariana grande & MIKA

[redshirtgal]

At the end  of the last article, you were promised a follow-up on Jay Jones and other TOS stars he had acted with. So what is this poster of Rough Night in Jericho doing here? Afraid you’ll have to read on to find out. But there are plenty of other Six Degrees of Trek instances involving Jay Jones.

Remember, his first television stunt job was in The Man from U.N.C.L.E was as Robert Vaughn’s stunt double but he also got to do some acting in the episode “Yo Ho Ho and a Bottle of Rum.” But we also see Illya Kuryakin being confronted by two T.H.R.U.S.H goons. Look closely at them. We’ve seen them before, but where? (Thanks to Brad Filipone for both photos!)

The T.H.R.U.S.H. henchman on the left in the episode was played by Pete Kellett who also played Kirk’s henchman Farrell in the Star Trek episode  “Mirror, Mirror.” And Dave Armstrong appeared as the henchman on the right. Armstrong later appeared on TOS as Kartan in “Operation: Annihilate!”

Actually, Jay and Pete would later appear together as Klingons in “The Day of the Dove.”

In the Bonanza episode “Kingdom of Fear” we see Jay Jones as a bad guy who tries to use his bullwhip on Hoss. To the left in this photo is his boss, a local judge who hires men to capture passing strangers and put them to work as slaves.  Can you name the actor and Star Trek episode he appeared in? Hint: He was in the first episode broadcast on NBC.

Maybe seeing the character will jog your memory. Remember him from “The Man Trap”? Professor Carter, married to Nancy, Dr. McCoy’s former love was played by Alfred Ryder. And he also was the actor who played the judge in the Bonanza episode.

Another connection - “Kingdom of Fear” was directed by Joe Pevney, who directed many of the best Star Trek episodes. He is shown above directing the episode “The Immunity Syndrome.”

We had already discussed Jay’s appearance as a demon in the Kung Fu episode “One Step to Darkness.” In that same episode was a doctor (on the left)  who treated Caine and other children for malaria. That doctor was played by Lloyd Kino and we’ve seen him before as well.

He appeared as Wu, Captain Tracey’s Kohm guard in “The Omega Glory.”

And now, we finally get to why the movie Rough Night in Jericho is mentioned at the beginning of this article. This movie contains not just Jay Jones as a stunt double and teacher for Slim Pickens, one of the villains in this movie, but there are nine ( count ‘em, 9) connections to Star Trek (counting Jones) Slim Pickens and George Peppard have a scene in this film where the two are involved in a brutal fight. Yarborough (Pickens) begins attacking Dolan (Peppard)  with his bullwhip (it has been established earlier he is an expert with the bullwhip). Once fighting gets more intense, two stuntmen jump in - Jay Jones for Slim Pickens and Bobby Clark for George Peppard. Remember Jay Jones had rodeo experience, which made him an excellent choice. He taught Pickens how to handle the bullwhip for the beginning of the scene and he took over for him when the hand to hand combat occurred.

Variety and other newspapers and magazines called this scene one of the most violent brawls in Western cinema at that time. Not only does Yarborough inflict quite a number of cuts to the body of Dolan but he and Dolan get into a bruising fight at the end. Dolan winds up killing Yarborough by bashing in his head with a club. You can bet Jay Jones and Bobby Clark handled a lot of the fight scenes.

One review mentioned it was easy to tell when Bobby Clark was in the scene instead of Peppard because Bobby’s hair was straw-colored and drier than Peppard’s own darker blonde hair (which was not dry at all). Take a look at the above photo. We don’t know for sure that this is Bobby Clark, but if you compare this person’s hair to George Peppard’s straighter blonde hair in this movie, there seem to be some differences. However, we could be completely wrong. By the way, Bobby Clark is credited in IMDb as a juror in the same movie but we couldn’t find him. It was not a traditional jury - mainly a gang of henchmen belong to Alex Flood (Dean Martin) gathered outside in the street on the site of a hanging.

Jay and Bobby had actually worked together before in Star Trek on the episode “Mirror, Mirror.” Jay was Scotty’s stunt double and Bobby was one of Chekov’s henchmen.

However, those two were not the only Star Trek: The Original Series actors to appear in Rough Night in Jericho. Above are two more of Flood’s hired hands, Torrey (appointed sheriff by Flood) and Simms. Both appeared on Star Trek, but on completely different episodes.

Torrey was played by Brad Weston who also played the one of the miners named Ed Appel in “The Devil in the Dark.” He and Jay Jones do share another place of honor in Trek history. Jay was considered for a recurring role with an accent, a character that we now know as Pavel Chekov. Coincidentally, Brad was also briefly considered for the same unspecified part. The character of Simms was played by Steve Sandor one year before he landed his role as Lars, Uhura’s drill thrall, in “The Gamesters of Triskelion.” Interestingly, another person who appeared in this episode with him was also in Rough Night in Jericho.

In the movie, Angelique Pettyjohn plays a bar girl who catches Dolan’s eye as he walks into Flood’s bar. But she was also Captain Kirk’s drill thrall in the previously mentioned episode of Star Trek. One more Trek actor/stuntman appeared in Rough Night in Jericho.

Bobby Herron was a stuntman who made several appearances on Star Trek, most notably that of Sam, the crewman in the gym who made the mistake of laughing at the main character in  “Charlie X.” He appears in the credits of Rough Night in Jericho as a stuntman, but of course, it would be nearly impossible to pick him out.

And now the 9th and final TOS connection with Rough Night in Jericho - and it’s not an actor. Albert Whitlock was the matte supervisor for the film and did the matte painting on the left for the background scene of the explosion that rocked Flood’s ranch and mines. We are familiar with his many matte paintings for Star Trek, including the one on the left from “The Cage.”

Finding several Trek actors in another TV series episode or movie is not all that unusual. Even stunt actors often popped up in other places before or after their Trek appearance. But as we were working on the Jay Jones article, we kept running into photos of these connections in so many of the shows and films he did, we figured we would just save them all and present them in a separate article. Thus ends another round of Six (or more) Degrees of Trek. Hope you enjoyed it!

[junker-town]

NHL free agents will have to start settling for professional tryouts soon

We’ve reached the point of the summer when players stop getting contracts, and start settling for PTOs. Who will follow that route?

There comes a point in each NHL offseason when the contract offers start drying up. Teams have mostly filled up their rosters for the upcoming season, and the pool of players on the open market looks increasingly like a list of veterans on their last legs, journeymen, and failed prospects searching for one more chance.

Last year, Antoine Vermette, Radim Vrbata, and Matt Cullen were the final three unrestricted free agents to get big league deals before training camps began. They each signed between Aug. 15-17. Recently, we saw Cullen and Francois Beauchemin sign new one-year deals that could be the last of this summer.

There’s usually a rash of signings right before the season as teams look to final their final spots, but between mid-August and late September, NHL teams start using a new tool instead of guaranteed contracts: the professional tryout, or PTO.

PTOs allow teams to bring in veteran players for training camp and preseason without any commitment to them. It’s a good way for teams to get a look at some extra options to fill out roles at the bottom of their rosters. Maybe a team just wants some additional competition in camp to push a younger player. The point is, you can sign someone to a PTO, and get rid of them with no penalty by October if things aren’t working out.

For veteran players, PTOs can represent one last chance at sticking in the NHL. These are players who teams deemed weren’t good enough to receive contract offers with the guaranteed money and risk that comes with them. But if the alternative is a zero-risk PTO that can be turned into a one-year deal if things work out, suddenly a player will garner a lot more interest.

Who got PTOs last year?

A lot of players received professional tryouts last year, but only a few of them actually took advantage to make their respective teams.

Kris Versteeg is one interesting case, as he signed a PTO with the Edmonton Oilers in early September, but never received a contract offer from the team. Instead, the Calgary Flames stepped up with a one-year, $950,000 deal for Versteeg in early October, and he provided them with 15 goals and 37 points in 69 games. This offseason, Versteeg avoided the headaches with a one-year, $1.75 million extension.

Edmonton did sign a different PTO player, defenseman Eric Gryba, to a one-year deal after a successful camp. He ended up recording six points in 40 games with the Oilers last season. Rene Bourque scored 12 goals for the lowly Avalanche after joining the team on a PTO in camp.

Not every PTO works so well. Tomas Fleischmann, Zach Boychuk, Maxim Lapierre, and James Wisniewski are among veterans who didn’t play in the NHL last season despite receiving tryouts in the fall.

Who could get PTOs this year?

There’s a lengthy list of veteran players running out of time to get actual contract offers. In that case, many of these guys will likely entertain the idea of signing PTOs. The most obvious name on the open market is Jaromir Jagr, but it’s hard to see the future Hall of Famer taking that route instead of playing in Europe or retiring.

Let’s break these up by position.

Forwards: Drew Stafford, Thomas Vanek, P.A. Pareanteau, Jarome Iginla, Shane Doan, Brian Gionta, Daniel Winnik, Mike Ribeiro, Alex Chiasson, Lauri Korpikoski, Scottie Upshall, Rene Bourque, Ryan White, Jiri Hudler, Chris Kelly, Jack Skille, Jay McClement, Jimmy Hayes, Vernon Fiddler, Teddy Purcell, Milan Michalek, Andrew Desjardins, Tanner Glass, Harry Zolnierczyk, Matt Hendricks, John Mitchell, Spencer Abbott

Nine of these players recorded at least 20 players in the NHL last season, led by Vanek’s 48 points in 68 games between the Red Wings and Panthers. He’s an offensive specialist who needs the perfect fit both on the ice and in the locker room, though, which has limited his opportunities.

There’s a wide variety of player-types in here. Gionta had 35 points last season. Hudler is just two seasons removed from recording 31 goals and 76 points. Winnik is the kind of bottom-six grinder that teams love to have. Stafford could provide goal scoring in the bottom half of a lineup.

But all these players have question marks one way or another, which is why they’re still unsigned in late August. Maybe a guy like Stafford or Vanek convinces a team to give him a one-year deal soon. Otherwise, it’s PTO time for all of these players.

Defensemen: Cody Franson, Dennis Wideman, Fedor Tyutin, Roman Polak, John-Michael Liles, Jyrki Jokipakka, Cody Goloubef, Nick Schultz, Jakub Kindl, Eric Gelinas, Adam Pardy, Simon Despres, Zbynek Michalek, Brady Austin

Not as many available defensemen, which isn’t surprising given fewer guys play the position and there’s usually high demand for experienced blue liners. The name that stands out here is Franson, who has typically put up respectable underlying statistics on terrible teams over the years. A 30-year-old with his size (6’5, 224 pounds) and track record would seem like a lock to get a new deal, yet he’s found himself in no man’s land with September around the corner.

There are also some younger options like Jokipakka (age 26), Goloubef (age 27), and Gelinas (age 26) who could intrigue teams looking to take fliers for depth on the back end. Polak’s agent reportedly said he could sign a deal soon, so that could scratch him off the list.

Goaltenders: A bunch of guys you’ve never heard of

If you’re an even semi-decent goaltender, chances are you’ve been scooped up by a team given the importance of the position. Cap Friendly lists just 10 goalies as current NHL UFAs, and none of them have ever played in an NHL game. If your team is still looking for netminder help in September, it’s basically trade, waivers, or bust to find a meaningful addition.

Will any of those players get contract offers?

Yes, there are players every offseason who turn their professional tryouts into guaranteed contracts. Versteeg, Gryba, Bourque, Korpikoski, Skille, and Devin Setoguchi are among guys who did that last year.

There should be a host of players to do the same this year. The most obvious is Franson, who surprisingly doesn’t have a job at this point. It would be hard to explain how he’d go without a contract offer into the start of the season given the way teams scoop up defensemen for depth.

Among the forwards, Stafford, Winnik, Parenteau, and Vanek are players who still seem to belong in the NHL. Iginla, Doan, and Gionta (not to mention Jagr) could also come back, although retirement remains an option for all of them given their respective ages.

Maybe some of these guys get short-term deals signed soon. David Schlemko waited until Sept. 10 to sign a one-year contract with the Devils in 2015, so it’s not like teams shut off the possibility entirely.

But for all of these guys, the road to the NHL is getting bumpier as the summer goes on. The opportunity to get a contract offer before camp is fading, and that’ll mean settling for a PTO and the chance to compete for a roster spot. Once you get this deep into the offseason, there’s not much more you can ask for.