Reiki: You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast?
Langa: Several traffic violations.
Shadow: Three counts of resisting arrest.
Joe: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks.
Cherry: Also, that’s not our car.
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I decided to muck around on the Incorrect Quotes Generator, and Here's what came out (Shadowhunter version)
(Website Link)
Simon: What’s up guys? I’m back.
Jace: What the- you can’t be here. You’re dead. I literally saw you die.
Simon: Death is a social construct.
Magnus: Man, I only ever see you awake, do you ever shut down or stop running?
Alec: Oh, I’m always running
Alec: The question is from what
Clary: Jace and I were crossing the street, and this dude drove by and honked at us
Simon: *Sighing* What did Jace do?
Clary: He chased him to the next red light, then reached into his window and...
Jace: Who wants a steering wheel?
*The squad right before Alec's wedding*
Magnus: Well I have to go, I have a wedding to attend.
Issy: Wait... Oh! I have a wedding to attend too!
Clary: Oh, I have a wedding to attend as well
Simon: I THINK WE ALL HAVE WEDDINGS TO ATTEND
Jace, panicked: I THINK I HAVE A WEDDING TO OFFICIATE
Clary: Can you keep a secret?
Alec: Do you know anything about my life?
Clary: No I do not. Good point.
Alec: Jail is no fun. I’ll tell you that much.
Magnus: Oh, you’ve been?
Alec: Once. In Monopoly.
Jace: Do you ever want to talk about your emotions, Alec?
Alec: … No.
Issy: I do!
Jace: I know, Issy.
Issy: I’m sad!
Jace: I know, Issy.
Simon: You saved me. I owe you my life.
Raphael: No thanks. I’ve seen it and I’m not very impressed.
Clary: Alec isn’t answering their phone
Magnus: I’ll call
Simon: Clary and I have both tried six times each, what makes you thi-
Alec: Hello?
I had to change the names around for them to make sense so many times lmao
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kidnapper: We have Princess Guinevere. Give us ten thousand dollars and they will be returned to you unharmed
Guinevere: Whoa, whoa, wait, you think I’m only worth ten thousand dollars?
Arthur:
Guinevere: MAKE IT ONE MILLION–
Arthur: GUINEVERE STOP
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ScatterPatter's Incorrect Quotes Generator
Featuring Brambleclaw
With bonus Jaypaw with Rock and Stoneteller
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Charlie: Just be yourself.
Sir Pentious: 'Be myself'? Charlie, I have one day to win Cherri Bomb over. How long did it take before you guys started liking me?
Angel Dust: Couple weeks.
Husk: Six months.
Alastor: Jury’s still out.
Sir Pentious: See, Charlie?
Sir Pentious: 'Be myself'. What kind of garbage advice is that?
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Crosshair: Why are you on the floor?
Hunter: I'm depressed.
Hunter: Also I was stabbed, can you get Echo, please.
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Jack: Guys I impulsively bought a snake, what do I name him ?
Davey: YOU DID WHAT—
Race: William Snakespeare.
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Bad: You know those things will kill you, right?
Cellbit, pouring another glass of whiskey: That’s the point.
Roier, smoking a cigarette: We’re trying to speed up the process.
Jaiden: *Nods while eating raw cookie dough*
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Ragatha, about Gummigoo: Apparently we’re getting someone new in the group.
Jax: Are we stealing them?
Kinger: New or used?
Pomni: Wonderful responses, both of you.
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Reader: name a more iconic duo then my crippling fear of abandonment and my anxiety. I’ll wait.
Adam, genuinely trying to bringing you comfort: you and me!
Reader, tearing up: okay.
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Nico: I think I’m having a mid-life crisis.
Will: You’re like 15 years old
Nico: I MIGHT DIE AT 30!!!
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Cherry: How did none of you hear what I just said?
Langa: I’ve been zoned out for the past two and a half hours.
Reiki: I got distracted about halfway through.
Joe: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.
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Jack, with all the newsies sitting in a circle around him: My policy is if you see something, say something.
Smalls: I saw a squirrel in a tree today!
Jack, in genuine awe: Outstanding.
Jack: This is what I’m talking about people.
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ScatterPatter's Incorrect Quotes Generator
Featuring some toxic couples.
MudxHawkxAsh
OneFire
BerryLion
The last one SENDS me
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Angel Dust: Who the fuck added me to a fucking group chat?
Charlie: >:O language
Niffty: Yeah watch your fucking language
Husk: OKAY WHO TAUGHT NIFFTY THE FUCK WORD?
Vaggie: 'The fuck word'.
Alastor: Are you stupid? You guys use the f word all the time
Niffty: Oh my god he censored it
Vaggie: Say fuck, Alastor.
Niffty: Do it, Alastor. Say fuck.
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