#sc has like. a better idea than most of them of what's happening (since they saw him originally freaking out when they were created) | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

lena-in-a-red-dress · 4 years ago

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holy cow that sc old guard au is so good!! 😍 pls continue it if ever you'd be so inclined,,, I like the idea of lena finding family with the old guard and navigating her relationship with kara and the superfriends in canon 😊

Okay, then how about we think about the fact that when Lena and Kara finally exchange secrets, Kara is eloquent and apologetic and hopeful, giving a beautiful speech that ends with "I'm Supergirl."

And Lena's response is "I'm dead."

Cue season finale break.

But then we immediately pick back up with "Except I'm not. I mean, I'm alive by any measure known to science, I've checked. But that doesn't change the fact that the night before I moved to National City I woke up in a warehouse in Metropolis and spat two bullets out of my skull."

Kara just stares at her like whaaaaat is happening.

"And those people, the ones in the lobby the other day, I think they're like me, because I've been having dreams about them ever since it happened and I think they're old. Like older than time old and honestly I've been trying not to think about it because the idea of living that long terrifies me and--"

Lena cuts off when Kara wraps her in a hug, squeezing her tight. After her momentary shock, Lena relaxes, abandoning her train of thought in favor of melting into Kara's embrace.

"It's okay," Kara promises. "We'll figure it out. Together."

Lena gladly accepts the fact that she doesn't have to go through her journey of immortality alone. And it's not just the superfriends she has to lean on, but also her new family of fellow immortals who have gone through the exact same thing she has.

She doesn't have to go into hiding like Nile did. So far, no one but Corben knows her secret, so the risk of being identified and studied by the government is minimal. So the focus of everyone's work becomes keeping it that way.

Andy and the rest of the old guard set themselves up as Lena's new ace security team. Andy is the brains and occasional sniper, but stays out of the direct line of fire. Nicky and Joe are the public facing bodyguards who go with her everywhere, while Nile is the last line of defense, posing as Lena's assistant.

The two groups don't really mesh at first, despite the superfriends' curiosities. The old guard has been too long alone and too long with death to know what to do with the superfriends' youthful exuberance. But eventually their mutual attachment to Lena brings them into each others orbits.

Joe and Nicky adapt first. They come to love game nights, and Nia adores their blatant love for each other. Nile is the closest to them in age, but game nights and giggly girl parties isn't exactly her scene. She and Lena share plenty of scotch though, on the nights when they're alone in the office and have nothing to do but talk.

Andy remains an enigma. To her, the people around them are all children, and she can't truly connect with them the way she does with the old guard. The only member of the superfriends she can connect with is Supergirl.

There's something about being the last of her world that makes Supergirl relatable, something about being earth's mightiest hero that creates the same invisible wall between her and her closest friends that Andy recognizes.

And Lena. Lena suddenly finds herself in a drastically changing landscape. Her apartment fills first with bodies and go bags, as the old guard camps in her living room and spare bedroom. Then slowly Nicky's drawings find their way to the walls, and knick knacks come to rest on every available surface. Weapons fill every nook and cranny, a fact Lena grows more accustomed to as Nile starts training her.

She's familiar with guns and can hold her own in hand to hand combat under normal circumstances, but it doesn't flow through her muscles like it does with the old guard. Each of them but Andy teaches them their own specialty, relentlessly, until Lena feels her body change, her muscles coiled and ready to explode into motion using nothing but reflexive memory.

When Lena asks about training with Andy, the others laugh.

"Give it another century," Joe says, smiling warmly, "then ask."

But Lena picks up fighting as quickly as she does everything else. Sparring with Nicky and Joe is the most fun for Lena-- she surprises them with her skill in bladed weapons, courtesy of her near-olympic level proficiency in fencing. But even with them Lena can barely hold a candle at first. She's good, better than good, but Joe and Nicky don't fight to earn points. They fight to kill. They move with their whole bodies, with power and momentum behind every strike.

Lena does all she can to catch up. She loves a challenge, and this is a matter of keeping her life the way it is-- something she'll cling to until it's ripped out of her warm, undying fingers. She wants to keep L-Corp, she wants to keep game nights, and movie nights, and... she wants to keep Kara.

And Kara.... Kara supports Lena through it all, but the truth of Lena's new reality doesn't really sink in until one day she and the old guard don't move fast enough. They're lucky, in the sense there's no one else to see the bullet that rips through Lena's sternum and blasts out of her back, taking chunks of flesh and bone with it.

Kara's heart stops, barely hears the gasping wheeze as Andy puts a knife through the shooters windpipe. All she can see is Lena, unmistakably dead.

But then Lena blinks into a grimace, a curse rising to her pinkening lips.

"Fuck."

Then, "Ow. Motherfucker."

Nile pulls Lena to her feet, putting her gun back in Lena's palm. Lena deftly checks the chamber and nods the okay, and Nile moves on. Only then does Lena see Kara standing stock still, eyes wide and chest locked against a burgeoning panic attack.

"Hey," Lena says softly. She takes Kara's hand in hers, letting Kara feel the warmth of her skin, the pulse of her veins. She even pulls her blouse aside so Kara can see the flesh knitting itself back together. "I'm okay. See?"

There's a word for what Lena is, but Kara's pretty sure it isn't okay. Still, its enough to get Kara's legs to move again. With a nod, she bounces on the balls of her feet then launches into the air, speeding through the remaining gunmen and piling them aside unconscious for the police to deal with later.

"Still gotta get used to that," Andy mutters under her breath, coming to check on Lena. "You good?"

Lena nods again. "You were supposed to stay in the van."

"Fuck off with that garbage." Andy glares at her. "One of my team goes down, I'm going to make sure they get back up."

Lena smiles. It feels different, to be so readily accepted into the guard. Even with the Superfriends, she's had to work to earn their trust, and slowly eased her way into becoming one of the group. With Andy and her people, from the moment they saw each other there's never been any other thought. Lena was theirs, and they were hers.

"Let's get going."

#old guard au #supercorp #lena is an immortal

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darling-i-read-it · 4 years ago

Text

And the Woman Clothed With the Sun...

3x09

Hannibal Lecter x reader x Will Graham

Hannibal Re-Write Series Masterlist

Word Count: 3.1k

Warnings: spoilers for hannibal, murder, dead bodies, nightmares, talk of children and having them

Author’s Note: I really really liked this episode. I love playing with dynamics SO MUCH. I hope you guys like this?

I used some direct quotes from the script so some things may seem familiar

Official Episode Summary: As the search for Francis Dolarhyde (Richard Armitage) continues, Will starts imagining himself in Dolarhyde's tormented psyche -- and asks Hannibal for help with the serial killer's profile; a new woman (Rutina Wesley) enters Dolarhyde's life.

I don’t own these characters. They belong to author/director

Tag List (is always open!) : @llperfectsymmetryll @ericacactus @vlightning95 @sweetgoodangel

(not my gif)

“That’s the same atrocious aftershave you wore in court,” Hannibal said. He turned around slowly, acting as though he were not surprised to see you and Will together. The thin line of glass between the two of you Hannibal seemed so thick.

The truth was, you had never truly gotten over Hannibal. You had pretended to, for the sake of Will, but you had never really stopped thinking about what he could be doing. There was a link that the three of you had with each other that was unexplainable. You had started a new life. But your old one still called your name.

“Hello, Dr. Lecter,” Will said simply. He was contained. You fed off of his energy to keep yourself in check as well.

“Hello, Will. Y/N.” He stepped closer to the two of you. “I believe congratulations are in order. I apologize I couldn’t make it to the wedding. Alana gave me some pictures, to taunt me presumably.” You smiled. You thought about Hannibal holding the pictures of you and Will laughing, beaming at each other. “Did you get my note?” You nodded.

“We got it. Thank you,” you said simply. You and Will stood close together. He had his coat draped over his arm and you held the papers from the cases.

“Did you read it before you destroyed it? Or did you simply toss it into the nearest fire?” Hannibal asked. You scoffed a bit.

“We read it. Then he burned it,” you promised. He nodded.

“And you came anyway.” Hannibal eyed you. “I’m surprised you let that happen.”

“We all falter in some ways,” you said simply.

“I want you to help me, Dr. Lecter,” Will said to break the conversation. He still didn't trust Hannibal with you. Reminiscent of the days you used to work with Hannibal.

“Yes I thought so. Are we no longer on a first-name basis?” Hannibal asked.

“I’m more comfortable the less personal we are,” Will said. Hannibal looked over at you, eyeing your entire body. He made note of the scent. The scent off of both of you.

“Your hands are rough Will. I smell dogs and pine and oil beneath that shaving lotion.” He looked at you. “Did you steal that perfume from my home?” he questioned. You stiffened. You had gotten some perfume from his home as they cleaned it out. You ended up liking and buying another bottle over the years.

“I’m here about Chicago and Buffalo. You’ve read about it, I’m sure,” Will said.

“I’ve read the papers. I can’t clip them. They won’t let me have scissors, of course. You want to know how he’s choosing them,” Hannibal commented. You held up the case file.

“Thought you might have some ideas.”

“You just came here to look at me. Came to get the old scent again. Why don't you just smell yourself Will? Or your wife?” Will let out a sigh.

“I expected more of you, doctor. That routine is old hat.” Hannibal nodded stiffly.

“Whereas you are new people,” Hannibal said. “Let me have the file. An hour, and we can discuss it like old times.” You nodded happily at that, pleased he would help. You shoved the file through the document tray and into the cell. Hannibal came close to collect it.

“Thank you,” Will muttered.

“Family values may have declined over the last century, but we still help our families when we can.” He took the papers. “You’re both family.”

Will grabbed you around the waist, eager to leave. Your eyes lingered on Hannibal’s for a moment longer before you and Will left the room, swallowing his true words.

You looked around Alana’s office. You hadn’t seen it since she had moved in. It looked better than when Chilton had run it. Perhaps that was just because you liked Alana more. The problems you once had with each other had mostly scabbed over. She was maid of honor at your wedding. Interesting, considering the fact you had once fought feverishly over Hannibal.

“It’s good to see you looking well. But I can’t help wishing you weren’t here,” Alana said. She sat on her couch. Her suit was pristine, her hair perfect. You admired her.

“You aren’t the only one,” you commented.

“I was surprised Jack came back in one piece,” she said. You nodded, running a hand over your pants before sitting down on the couch beside her. Will stood up, looking out the window.

“You weren’t the only one,” Will said, turning to both of you.

“How did it feel to see him again?” she questioned. You looked at the ground. Will sat down beside you, in between you and Alana.

“Like Hannibal was looking through to the back of my skull. Felt like a fly flitting around in there. I had the absurd feeling that he walked out with me. Had to stop outside the doors and look around, make sure it was just Y/N,” Will commented.

“I know that feeling. At least Jack Crawford’s pleased.” You pursed your lips but stayed quiet.

“He showed me pictures of the families. I looked at Y/N and couldn’t say no,” he argued.

“Damn my presence,” you joked softly. Will slung his arm around the couch behind you, his fingered brushing your shoulder.

“And Jack was counting on it.”

“Are you still with Margot?” you asked, eager to change the subject. She took a deep breath and nodded, thinking fondly of her wife.

“Yes. We have a baby. A Verger baby. A son,” she said. You smiled. You and Will had talked about kids. You wanted one. You were working for one when Jack spiked both yours and Will’s stress levels.

“Good for Margot,” Will said.

“Good for me. I carried him. He’s my son. He’s the Verger heir.” You smiled.

“Then what are you doing here? You’re set for life,” you pointed out.

“There are only five doors between Hannibal and the outside. And I have the keys to every one of them,” she said. A daily ‘gotcha’ to Hannibal. Will admired that. “Hannibal has never been great with boundaries. ‘He who sups with the Devil needs a long spoon’.”

“I am not letting him in, Alana. Don’t worry about me,” Will said. She looked at you sympathetically.

“Last time, it didn't’ end with you Will.”

“I want you to stay here,” Will said, standing outside Hannibal’s cell door. He hadn’t stepped inside yet. Hannibal could not see him. You scoffed.

“We’ve been over this. I follow you, even if you say no.”

“This time, I mean it. I think I’ll get more out of him if he isn't’ distracted with you.” You raised an eyebrow.

“You sure you aren’t jealous?” He gave you a look. “Fine, fine. Please be quick.”

Will stepped into the room, leaving you outside to wait. Hannibal looked up at him from his desk.

“This is a very shy boy, Will. I’d love to meet him,” Hannibal said. He looked around. “Just us?”

Will nodded.

“Just us.”

“Have you considered the possibility that he’s disfigured? Or that he may believe he’s disfigured?” Hannibal asked.

“That’s interesting.”

“That’s not interesting. You thought of that before.” Will nodded.

“He smashed all the mirrors in the houses, not just enough to get the pieces he wanted. The shards are set so he can see himself. In their eyes. Mrs. Jacobi and Mrs. Leeds. And their families,” Will said. Hannibal pulled out the picture of a dead Mrs. Jacobi.

“Could you see yourself in their eyes, Will? Killing them all?”

Will instantly regretted leaving you outside.

The two boys imagined themselves in the crime scenes, looking across the dead bodies of the families.

“The first small bond to the killer itches and stings like a leech,” Hanibal said. “Like you, Will, he needs a family to escape what’s inside him.” Wills head shot up but he did not look at Hannibal. “You know a fair amount about how these families died. How they lived is how he chooses them.”

“How is he choosing them?” Will asked.

“I was surprised to hear you actually married Y/N. Not because I thought you weren’t a match made in heaven but it made more sense for you to start a family from scratch. No one that had even an inkling of me in their eyes. Find a mom with a stepson or daughter, not having to breed. You know better than to pass the terrible traits that you fear the most,” Hannibal said. Will did not look at him. Hannibal continued. “But Y/N wants children with you. How will you stand to look at a child you may have ruined before they were even born?”

Will desperately wished he hadn’t left you outside.

“Why are there no descriptions of the grounds? I see floor plans, diagrams of the rooms where the deaths occured, no mention of the grounds. What were the yards like?” Hannibal continued, satisfied with how he had shaken Will’s personal life.

“Big, fenced, with trees. Why?”

“If this pilgrim feels a special relationship with the moon, he might like to go outside and look at it before he tidies himself up. If one were nude, say, it would be better to have outdoor privacy for that sort of thing. One must show some consideration for the neighbors, hmmm? Have you ever seen blood in the moonlight, Will?”

Will suddenly saw himself in place of the killer, naked, drenched in pitch black blood.

Will snapped back and nodded quickly.

“Thank you Dr. Lecter,” he said before stumbling out of the door. You sat on the outside in one of the waiting chairs. Will looked over at you and seemed to relax but not completely.

“Will?”

He grabbed you and you stood up quickly, hugging him tightly. He buried his head in your neck and you let him, rubbing your back.

“This is why you don’t go without me places,” you muttered. He scoffed but his breathing was already evening again. “What did he say?” He moved back and shook his head softly.

“We’ll talk about it later. I want to see the backyards.” You raised an eyebrow.

“Alright, I suppose.”

He walked out of the asylum, holding your hand tightly. Freddie snapped a couple pictures from the bushes.

“Have you come to wag your finger?” Hannibal asked as Alana entered the room behind him.

“I love a good finger-wagging.”

“Yes, you do. How is Margot?” Alana ignored the remake as she gleaned down at the picture of her as Botticelli’s Fortitude.

“Your cogs are turning, Hannibal. I can hear them clicking.”

“Click, click, click, boom,” he whispered.

“I don’t know what you’re planning with the Grahams. But you’re planning something. Why wouldn’t you be? You’ve already cracked the lid, can’t resist peeling it back.”

Hannibal pursed at the name. Alana noticed this.

“You can’t comment on her last name anymore you know. They’re married. She is, in the eyes of the law, a Graham now.” Hannibal stiffened.

“They came to me,” Hannibal said, ignoring her words.

“Yes, they did.”

“I advised them against it.”

“I’m sure.”

“Are you suggesting I don’t have Y/N and Will’s best interests in mind?” he asked. Alana scoffed.

“I’m stating it as a fact.”

You stepped into the room with Hannibal’s cage. He looked up, quite surprised to see you. You held your purse in both hands, stepping closer to the cage.

“Hello love,” he said quietly. You let his words fall off of you like rain. They stayed for a moment, dripping down your arm before hitting the ground. “I don’t imagine you’re here to talk about the murder cases.” You shook your head softly. He walked up to the glass quietly. You stepped close to it, so you were really only a couple of inches apart.

“I came to yell at you,” you said. He raised an eyebrow.

“Whatever for?” You smiled gently and shrugged.

“Lots of things. Firstly, you didn’t kill Jack when you got the chance. I’ll never forgive you for not feeding him to me in soup.” His eyes went wide.

“Careful Y/N. Alana watches these tapes.”

“She would probably agree with me.” You took a deep breath. “Secondly, not coming to my wedding. I know you were otherwise indisposed but I thought it was rather rude.”

“I thought it was rude of you to get married.” You shook your head playfully. The same banter. Joking with a cannibal serial killer. Just another Tuesday.

“Third, I told you to leave.” The air seemed to calm.

“Does Will know you’re here?”

“No. I didn’t tell him.”

“Did he tell you he’s scared of his own children?” You raised a finger, shaking it gently.

“Tsk, tsk, tsk. Will is no longer my boyfriend I dated a couple of months. He’s my husband. You can’t wedge yourself between us no matter how hard you try.” You wanted to put your hand against the glass but you didn’t. “But I miss you.”

“Where do you work nowadays?” You shrugged.

“I had to get another secretary job but I’ve mostly worked up enough to take this amount of leave. My last employer wasn’t exactly the best reference.” He laughed.

“I suppose you’re right.” He paused. “Eating well?”

“Better. No people in the diet these days.”

“Pity.”

“Will!” You broke Will out of his thoughts. You were standing in the back of the Jacobi house. Will had just found a small sign on one of the trees. He was about to get into it but you had broken him out of his mind. “It’s Freddie.”

Will walked out from the trees and shoved his hands in his pockets.

“Now are you just keeping America clean or is that evidence?” Freddie asked.

“You’re trespassing, Freddie,” Will said sternly.

“I was trespassing before the blood dried. When did they call you? Interesting to see The Bloody Valentines back at action. Beautiful ceremony by the way.”

“We aren’t talking to you,” Will said, grabbing your arm. You followed him.

“We’re co conspirators, Will. I did for you and your cause.”

“You didn’t die enough. You came into my hospital room while I was asleep. You flipped back the sheets and shot a picture of my temporary colostomy bag,” Will said, turning to her.

“Covered your junk with a black box. A big black box. You’re welcome,” she said.

“Justly so,” you argued carefully.

“You culled us the ‘murder threesome’. Little crude, don't you think?”

“You did run off to Europe together. Doesn’t help that the two of you ended up getting married. How does the Tooth Fairy compare to Hannibal Lecter? Haven’t seen anything like this since the Massacre at Muskrat Farm. Funny thing about that massacre. Not only did Dr. Bloom survived, she got rich. Lecter’s living in the lap under her care. What kind of arrangement you suppose they have?” Freddie asked.

“A complicated one,” you said sternly.

“Couldn’t be more complicated than your relationship with Hannibal. Both of you. You paid him a visit? Before you lie, know that I know that you did,” she said quickly.

“Good-bye Freddie.”

“I read your note before my office forwarded it to the Grahams,” Jack said, standing in front of Will. Hannibal swallowed, understanding.

“To whet their appetite or yours? You’ve placed him back in the pot and you’re letting him cook.”

“We’re all in this stew together.”

“Arguable considering how close Y/N is to drowning you.”

You stepped into the hotel room where Will was already sitting on the bed. You ran a hand through your hair and let the chilly cold wash over you as you entered the warm room.

“How are the dogs?” he asked.

“Good. The dog sitters said they were missing us but other than that, they’re okay,” you promised. You looked down at the dog that was laying on the ground beside the bed. “She’ll be right at home with them.”

You sat on the bed and Will sat up, putting his arms around you from behind. You smiled about him, happy to see he was feeling better.

“I’m worried about the kids,” he whispered.

“The kids who don’t exist?” He laughed gently.

“Yeah. I don’t want them to end up like me.” You nodded slowly.

“So that’s what Hannibal said that got you worked up.” You took in the information. “If the kid isn’t like you I don’t think I’d be able to love them as much as I love you.”

It was his turn to take in the information.

“You’re just saying that.”

“Nope. I’m serious. I’ve never loved anyone as much as I’ve had the pleasure of loving you Mr. Graham.” He kissed your neck gently and smiled to himself.

“I love you too Mrs. Graham.”

You let out a small sigh of relief.

Will screamed as he sat up quickly, sweating aggressively, blankets flying. You got up just as quickly, turning to him but he had already gotten up, rushing into the bathroom. You followed him, sleep that had just taken you over long gone.

You practically ran up to him. He was looking at himself in the mirror, fear in his eyes at his reflection. You grabbed him quickly and he turned to you, wrapping his arms around you. You didn’t speak. You didn’t ask questions. You just held him as close as you could get him.

Nightmares had come back. Neither of you had had those in a while. You rubbed his back and let him breath.

3x10

#will graham x reader #hannibal lecter x reader #will graham x reader x hannibal lecter #hannibal lecter x reader x will graham #will graham imagines #hannibal lecter imagines #hannibal imagines

187 notes · View notes

hanjo-love · 4 years ago

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Now I became selfish and I hope the shard is showing Hanji being saved by Kiyomi or something. She go the worst treatment and if Isayama was afraid of the backslash like you said why make it even worse with those parallels with eremika? Is he preparing the Fandom for another levihan moment? I'm tired of EVERYONE surviving but her, Kiyomi's kindness really??? And Onyankopon, while I don't hate him, he survived a plane crash and he doesn't add much yet he is there for being the editor's favorite, Yelena is there after all she did and she adds even less, and the people titanized will revert to human (or at the very least Isayama's favorites will).

Oh anonie, you and me both my friend, you and me both 😔 Beware, a long rant-ish meta is ahead of you lol

I have absolutely no fucking idea why Yams decided to treat Hanjo like shit. You know, after a long time of denying her death, I was starting to accept it, because she was finally free, free of the burden and pain and finally reunited with the people she missed and longed for the most. But then Yams decided to slap us all in the faces saying there's no happy & peaceful afterlife in snk and Hanjo was probs only hallucinating because of her 4 years long depression? Well then, fuck you Yams! What was that even for? Isayama never backed off of showing us the horrors of death in snk, no matter how important the characters and how brutal their deaths really were. Still, he never showed us Hanji's actual death or dead body. He kept it misterious and his vague answers only made it worse. So it's only natural for us to expect a plot twist, right? That's the reason all of us gathered various hints in the manga, anime and his interviews. And lemme tell you, these theories are far more logical, better explained and have less plot holes than the entire final arc smh (yes I'm salty, fight me lol)

I hate to admit it, my inner self is still in denial and fighting, but Hanjo ain't coming back folks. We won't get any background story and the misterious shard will never be explained to us either. Yams had more than enough time to bring Hanjo back, if he truly wanted to. But he didn't. And now with only one chapter and so many unanswered questions left, there's no time for Hange's return. Why would he even do that anyways? Hanjo isn't important to him or to the story anymore. To us she is, always was and always will be ❤️ You know, I'm so fucking desperate to see her again, I'll even take one last panel of Levi remembering her, just like in ch136. Yams just let us see Hanjo one more fucking time 🙏🏻 I need to say my proper goodbyes to my one&only comfort character, who's influenced my life like no one else ever did ❤️

Back to Levihan (I don't think I can answer an ask without my biased and trashy shipper ass butting in lmfao): the question why Yams confirmed Levihan as canon if he didn't intend to bring Hange back and reunite her with Levi to make us him happy again? Well, isn't it obvious? This man is the devil incarnate. THIS MAN HAS NO FUCKING CHILLS lmfao JK y'all before someone declares war on me and my blog haha Well anonie, I feel like Yams really wanted to confirm his initially planned ships as canon, before the manga ends. And he chose the safest way possible. Easy as that. Also he said he is going for a bittersweet ending and what's more tragic (in this literal hell) than separating lovers, ergo Eremika and Levihan.

Now to something else, that's been bothering me for a while now and I'll use your ask anonie to share my thoughts with the world even though nobody asked lmao tbh I'm a bit disappointed with Armin. I love him, I really do. He's my precious cinnamon roll and my fave 104th kiddo. But honestly, I was expecting a bit more of the alleged "hero who will safe humanity". In fact, I'm sure Hanjo only died for Armin to become the new commander. That's it. That was the reason she had to die. Yams glossed over her to make Armin shine. But in fact, Levi's the one who's giving orders ever since Hange has left them. I might me salty, but I really hope the talk with Zeke (and probs Ymir as well, we still might have a chance to see the dialog that made Ymir change her mind) and his titan nuke weren't the only things he did as "humanity's hero" in this final arc. For some people this might me enough, for me it isn't. It wasn't worth Hange's sacrifice. Also what made me really sad was Armin himself glossing over Hanjo when he remembered Erwin Danchou, but not her. Like she didn't just pass away an hour ago to save their pathetic asses. Ugh this is making me hella mad, ngl. Hanjo didn't deserve this treatment! She gave her all for this! To save the alliance, to "pay the price" for her "sins" as the SC commander and to save humanity. I can't deal with how all of them and the fandom apparently forgot about that.

Now on to "Kiyomi's kindness" lol I wasn't really mad at Gabi for saying this as most of the fandom was. I won't go into detail why she isn't really a rationally thinking character (yo guys, you do remember she's a 12 year old kid, right?), but it's a fact that she didn't care for Hange enough to mention her. I mean, why would she? She barely even knew her. Also we don't really know what's gonna happen with Yelena, Kiyomi and her delegation. I don't know if I'm reading too much into it, but I feel like Kiyomi accepted her death with saying "that's not enough atonement for what I did anyway". I mean they don't know if the alliance will win (they probably think they won't) and they're in the middle of literally nowhere. So I feel like Gabi said that because Kiyomi sacrificed herself (and the others on that ship) willingly, for Gabi, Falco and Annie getting a little chance of surviving and helping the alliance. But I get the rage of the fandom. Especially because no one, except for Levi, remembered Hange after her noble sacrifice.

As for Yelena and Onyankopon, there obviously has to be someone from outside of Paradis to survive the rumbling, otherwise it wouldn't make a lot of sense, I guess. I like Onyankopon a hecking lot ❤️ precious boi was literally crying for Hanjo 😭 Yelena on the other hand deserves what she got. Death would be too easy and kind for her tbh. She has to live with the consequences, just like Kiyomi, so I'm actually glad they survived. So my guess is, it's not really about who's Yams' favorite and what these people are contributing to the story, but it's rather about a logical ending and a good conclusion of the story.

I agree with you about the ones who have been titanized. They'll for sure revert back to humans. It's not really Yams' style to kill of an important character like Gabi, whose character development he's been forcing on us for quite a while now lol. I'm pretty positive about an ending with the titan curse being broken and bringing the titanized people back to human beings (probs also the millions of colossal titans?). It's only natural for Yams to end the story with the titan curse being lifted. Otherwise it wouldn't make sense to end his story at this point. But let's not forget what a big ass troll Yams is lmao you never really know what he's up to, so let's prepare for the unimaginable lmfao

I'll probably never forgive Isayama for what he did to Hange, his best written character, how he completely ruined her and threw her away as disposable, just to make other characters "shine". HER DEATH WAS POINTLESS AND IT DID NOT FUCKING CHANGE ANYTHING! That's the harsh truth y'all. Yams betrayed Hanjo and us AND FOR WHAT?

Thanks for the ask anonie and sorry I turned this into my personal rant lmao hope you still enjoy reading my thoughts on this ❤️

#anonymous #asks #Hange #Hanji #Hange Zoe #Hanji Zoe #Hans Zoe #Hansi Zoe #Levihan #OTP #Ship #snk #shingeki no kyojin #Hajime Isayama #Holy moly that was a long one haha sorry about that folks 😂#Meta #Snk meta

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rivamikaislife · 4 years ago

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About chapter 138...

Okay, so i just read the full chapter, and to be honest, i was left with even more questions than answers. And the pain of losing more nice characthers all over again. I hope they can be turned back somehow, or the sadness will be even bigger in the last chapter.

Connie realizing what was going to happen to them, so sad. Some might say Levi was to harsh here, but he's still the Captain of SC and has to guarantee the survival of those who can stop the rumbling. I'm very sure that was really hard to him to give this order and leave Jean and Connie behind. But again, that's why he's the best character in my opinion, Levi doesn't often let his emotions speak louder than his duty. His main goal is to protect the rest of humanity, he always put the greater good above his desires. I'm glad he's alive and still keeping everyone focused on the mission. A true captain.

First, i wanna say that Levi worries so much about this girl, since the beginning! But his words are always priceless LOL, it wasn't "Hey, you're okay?" or "Mikasa, what's going on?", indeed, was a very Levi way of showing concern "get your shit together". It is very funny to see him trying to help but at the same time scolding her. And the "we're the only ones who can kill Eren", wow, that was so powerful, because yes, they are the only ones. And there is nothing that i love more than seeing they fighting together.

And the huge development in their relationship? At first, Mikasa used to hate him because he hurted Eren, but now they are working together to kill Eren. Mikasa now trust and relies on Levi. I live for my Ackermans crumbs.

Now, about this...I have a lot of questions about this "dream", "illusion" or "alternative reality", whatever, that Mikasa was seeing.

I'm still confused and not sure of what it was. I saw some people saying this was an alternative reality Eren sent to Mikasa's mind so she could see what would have happened if she had told him that she was in love with him back in chapter 123 events. And i saw some saying it was all an illusion or dream that she made up to herself, as a way of achieving her desires to live peacefully, away from the war and everything. There's also the theory that it was an old memory, from other life that she lived before, but ended bad too. I definitely cannot say which seems more true or possible. If someone has a good idea of what it really was, please explain to me.

What intrigues me the most is this whole conversation, which is pretty similar to the conversation child Mikasa and child Eren had in chapter 1. It's like a dejá-vu, but not exactly the same, cause their roles are switched. So, it's Mikasa's dream? Or Eren's dream? Or is it something else? It is really and alternative reality that both of them dreamed about? Also, when Mikasa says "i'm not sure if i am supposed to be here", it was a weird statement. Like she was instantly back from somewhere else, starts crying unconsciously and wonder if she is where she needs to be. I don't know why, but this caught me. "Supposed to be here". I need answers Isayamaaaaa

And the last point in the "dream" that i would like to comment. When Eren tells that they ran away alone because Mikasa asked. Literally everything in this part of the conversation seems to absurd for me to believe. I doubt Eren would give up of his promised revenge to destroy their enemies just because Mikasa asked him to do. She asked him many times to believe in the others, to share his thoughts and he never did neither of them. Mikasa and Armin always tried to understand and show support to Eren, and he was the one always acting on his own. So no, excuse me, but i don't believe he would leave it all behind and go to live in a cabin in the middle of nowhere knowing that Armin and the others were fighting for their home. He was the one who promised to take revenge, he was the one asking "if we kill all enemies in the other side of the ocean, will we be free?"

The same goes for Mikasa, i strongly doubt she would abandon Armin, Sasha and the others just to live with Eren while the others has to fight and face a war all by themselves. Yes, she loves Eren, but she love her friends too. Mikasa isn't that egoistic and reckless teenager anymore, she changed. So, that other reality is many ways, a impossible one at least in my interpretation. However, it could have happened if Isayama decided to ignore the main goal of the protagonist and the entire development of Mikasa.

But that's the thing, it doesn't seem like that happened. It's more like a illusion of what she wanted but knew it couldn't happen.

So, how the hell when she's back, Mikasa suddenly knows the exact location of Eren's head? I mean, no one knew the exact location before, and the shifter usually is supposed to be on the neck. Maybe i missed something? She was certain of his location and headed to without hesitation.

The moment she comes back, after Eren asks her to forget about him, is interesting too. After listening to his wish, she decides to finally kill him and to do the opposite of his desire. Here she is in her full control and is her decision. I need to gush over Levi accepting immediately her words and helping her to fulfil her decision. He's always so supportive with her. Armin too! Her two best boys by her side, as she has to do the thing she postponed the most.

And the moment that surprised me the most (the kiss was gross, but okay, nothing special), her last words to Eren are the exact same words that Eren listened in his dream/memory in chapter 1 and is the last thing he saw before he dies. That confused me so much. So it really was a memory of something that happened? Or the dream got mixed with reality and sent through the paths to young Eren? What this all means?

The fandom always liked to theorize that the dream of Eren with Mikasa saying goodbye "see you later" with her short hair was his last vision before death. But it would make sense if it happened inside the main line of the events, and not in a dream of a supposed alternative reality, right?

I think i'm going crazy, i don't know what to think anymore. And i honestly don't know if we gonna get all the answers in the final chapter. I just hope it ends the better possible, given the options left. And i just want my Ackermans to be happy and live a good life from now on. Together if possible. In the end, rivamika survived it all. I can be grateful for that :)

Sorry for the mega text, if someone read all this and have some thoughts to share, please, you're welcome!

#snk meta #snk 138 #rivamika

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606writings · 4 years ago

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SC: Depression [Lucien]

A/N: This was definitely not the best I could do but I wanted to finish this one no matter what! This is slightly based on an experience I had with an anxiety attack and depression, so I’m not sure if it will be relatable for you all, but I really hope you enjoy❤

Genre: Little bit of angst and kind of fluffy.

Word count: 2,672.

It was a wonderful and sunny day, perfect for a walk and eating something refreshing and sweet, so you thought it would be a good idea to pay your boyfriend a visit to his office and drag him out of there to walk with you, since you were sure he probably has been stuck for a long time in his laboratory working his ass off, as always.

I should’ve brought something less sweet for Lucien, maybe he hasn’t eaten yet…

You were wondering if it was better to go back and get him a salad or something healthy and fresh to eat first, but quickly brushed off the idea as you were entering the building, too late to go back to home.

I hope I won’t be getting on his way by coming here without a notice.

You started fidgeting with the bag of ice creams in your hands, walking up the stairs directly to his office, but you were frozen by the sight of a beautiful, tall, and well-dressed woman walking down the hallway at the same time as Lucien opened his office’s door and stepped out with a graceful smile to welcome the woman, without noticing your presence just a few meters behind him.

“Professor Lucien! I’m so excited to work with you today!” The woman curved her red velvet lips forming a wide smile, placing her left hand on your boyfriend’s shoulder with a delicate movement.

You only stood there for a few seconds as they greeted each other, but you could only notice how she batted her lashes with hints of nervousness, and she wouldn’t stop smiling and leaning her body towards Lucien, in a clear sign of attraction.

Lucien was acting just as eloquent and professional as ever, but he was obviously smart enough to notice the woman’s behavior.

“Should we continue talking inside? There’s a lot of work waiting for us.” The calm and sophisticated voice of your boyfriend interrupted your analysis over her, and you could react just after the door was shut behind them, leaving you expectant at the last stair step.

Slightly confused you looked around you not knowing what to do, when you spotted one of Lucien’s coworkers you sometimes talked to, and approached him.

“Excuse me, sir.” You smiled lightly as a polite salute, as he turned around and smiled back at you. “I’m sorry, is professor Lucien busy right now? I came by surprise and wanted to say hi to him.”

“Oh, dear, what a sweet girlfriend you must be.” The man chuckled, making you blush slightly. “But unfortunately, yes. Professor Lucien just received an important guest today! We were all in the building so eager to meet her, she is Maria Irwin!”

The old man in front of you seemed pretty excited just by telling you her name, as if you obviously knew who she was. But looking at your confused expression, he laughed and shook his hand in the air.

“Ah, sorry, sorry! I suppose you’re not well aware of the scientific community!” He kept explaining. “She is just as known and respected as professor Lucien in our community, as smart as she is beautiful, if I dare to say. Maria came here to work in an important project with him, so this was a long-awaited visit; they will probably be busy for a while.”

You sighed and nodded slowly, understanding how important that meeting must be, so it was better for you not to interrupt them.

You thanked the man and started walking back home again with the bag in your hands still full of all the ice creams and sweets you brought, which you probably would have to eat alone back at home.

It was sort of a long walk from Lucien’s office to your apartment, and since it was a sunny and warm day you would better hurry up and get home fast. But you were too busy immerse in your thoughts to force the pace.

She was definitely the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen… And she must be pretty smart if she was compared to Lucien…

Those were innocent thoughts about how a beautiful woman walked into your boyfriend’s office, but then you remembered the way she looked at him and the way she clearly was flirting with him.

You weren’t the jealous type of girlfriend, but you surely knew how to recognize when a beautiful and smart woman was on another whole level from you.

They kind of looked good together, actually…

You stopped in your tracks suddenly overwhelmed by the thought that just crossed your mind. You knew you shouldn’t be saying -or thinking- that kind of stuff. Lucien was your boyfriend, for the love of God! You knew he loved you and he was such a gentleman and a decent person, of course he would never look at another woman.

But the unwelcomed feeling that was growing in your chest was not because you were afraid of him cheating on you, it was because you knew that Maria Irwin -whoever she was- was much better than you and that maybe she would be a better partner for Lucien.

A smart woman for a smart man; a beautiful woman for a handsome man; an elegant and sophisticated woman for an equally elegant and sophisticated man. They were the perfect match, without a doubt.

Why would Lucien be with me, when he can be with any other woman…? What does he even see in me…?

You could feel the anxiety and insecurities crawling out from the darkest places of your mind, leaving negative thoughts on their way. All the horrible feelings you had not encountered in a long time were coming back at once; you were feeling so overwhelmed by them you could not hear anything outside from your breathing, and your eyes were focused on the ground.

I’m not even that pretty, and I’m nowhere near as smart as them…

Heavy panting replaced your soft breathing as your chest tightened and you felt your eyes getting filled with tears.

He should be with someone at his level, why would he be with me…? Am I even worth it…?

Your trembling hands wouldn’t stop until you felt something dripping in your right shoe. Your eyes moved only a little to then be placed over the bag you were carrying in your hands, now soaked in colorful liquids; the ice cream was almost completely melted by now.

As if something switched in your mind out of nowhere, your tears suddenly stopped falling from your eyes, and your hands were no more shaking.

Now you were just an empty shell.

You stood there quiet for a moment, just assimilating what was happening with you. You could not feel anything else other than the heaviness trapped in your chest, but all the physical symptoms of your anxiety attack were gone, and that was better than nothing because now at least you could get home as quick as possible.

A few hours later you were now in sitting in your couch with your head thrown back, and your eyes stuck on the ceiling. You weren’t thinking any more of what happened before with Lucien and that other woman, your mind was almost completely blank, but every now and then small thoughts invaded you:

Should I just break up with him…?

He is just wasting his time with me; he could be with someone else…

Look at me pitying myself… If Lucien saw me like this, he would know how pathetic I am…

Your train of thought was interrupted by a familiar sound, letting you know you received a text from your boyfriend. Without even noticing it, your hand was already slowly reaching your phone, in an almost automated movement.

“I heard that you were here earlier, did you need something?” The shinning screen in your hands was showing a text waiting for your response, which you weren’t sure to give; you didn’t intend to ignore him but at the same time you wanted to avoid any contact with him because that would only make you feel worse.

“Yeah, I dropped by just to say hi.” You forced yourself to write.

“Sorry for not receiving you. I’ll get you dinner tonight.”

“No need to. I’m about to sleep anyway.”

After that last message you didn’t even bother to check if there was any response from him. You said that just as an excuse but you actually thought it was better to sleep and try to forget everything that happened today.

Unfortunately, you couldn’t even do that. After two hours of laying in your bed looking at the ceiling you weren’t able to fall asleep; the emptiness inside you would not let you relax at all, it started to get annoying at this point, you could feel how your temperament was getting worse with any second that passed by.

The next morning, after you only slept 2 hours, when your alarm rang your automated movements came back and you started getting ready for work without even paying any attention whatsoever. The rest of the day was just like that: a memorized daily routine effected with the least possible effort just to get through the day without getting to think too much.

You made an effort to ignore any message in your phone that was left from Lucien; more than trying to ignore him, it was a defense mechanism to try and forget those previous feelings that had put you in that state in the first place. It was not fair for Lucien but you just weren´t ready to confront him, not when all these negative things were swirling around your mind. You wanted to get better so he would never get to see that side of you.

Later that day, you were arriving home later than usual because you tried to keep yourself busy until the very end. Maybe it was an unconscious decision so you would not bump into Lucien that night, since you two usually got home at the same time.

Apparently, destiny was working against you, because just as you were walking out of the elevator you saw a tall man standing in front of your door looking at something in his phone, distracted.

Then your phone started ringing, causing the tall man to turn around and see you. You looked down to your home screen and the name Lucien was shining.

“Aren’t you picking up?” The man’s voice brought you out of your auto-pilot mode, and only then you noticed that man -Lucien- standing there with his phone dialing you in his left hand while looking at you with expectation.

“Oh, sorry…” You blinked slowly still not completely out of trance, and you passed by him walking to your door to enter your home.

“Are you okay, Y/N?” His soft voice showing hints of worry pierced your ears, causing you to slowly process what the situation was, throwing reality at your face.

Instead of answering his question, you accidentally dropped your keys when your hands started trembling. All the feelings your unconscious was trying to avoid since the previous day, piling up inside you, came out at once.

“You weren’t answering my texts since last night. I got worried and decided to…” Your ears stopped working in that moment; you body could not take anything more.

You stepped back stunned, your mind was completely blank for a second and you felt yourself trapped in a little cage inside your mind. You were there, but at the same time you weren’t in charge of your body any more.

You only felt a strong grip holding your arms from behind you, stopping you from crashing into the floor. The dizziness stopped for a second only to hear your boyfriend’s voice:

“Y/N! Can you hear me? Are you okay?”

Tears started streaming down your face, with loud cries bursting from your mouth without you even intending to. At that moment, his voice full of love and worry had already broken whatever that was containing all your feelings.

Everything was getting blurry at that point; you only heard yourself crying out loud with Lucien speaking slowly in your ear trying to comfort you. And then you noticed you were being carried in his arms into his apartment, and placing you in the couch.

By now, you regained conscience of what was happing again, but you didn’t care and kept crying and getting everything out of you; maybe that would make you feel better.

“Whenever you feel ready to talk, darling…” Lucien’s calm voice as ever, worked as a sedative and helped you quiet your loud sobs.

He hugged you tightly and held you against him with gentleness, not caring how your tears were ruining his white shirt, just showing you how much he cared and that he would be patient with you until you wanted to open up to him.

It took you almost an hour to completely calm down; an hour in which he held you close, whispered sweet nothings in your ear, and placed small kisses on your forehead.

“Lucien…” You suddenly spoke with a scratchy voice, from your tired throat.

“Mmm?” He mumbled gently.

“Why…? Why are you with me…?” You pushed yourself to ask him what was bothering you.

He stayed quiet for a few seconds, with obvious confusion about your question, but then he sighed in relief that you were talking again to him.

“Haven’t I mentioned you already why I love you so much?” He grinned.

You shook your head slowly in response.

“You are the sweetest person I know. You are what kids these days would call a young and cheerful soul.” Lucien laughed.

You blushed and hid your face in his chest, not sure how to absorb his words.

“Because I’m more of a science man, I love how you can see the magic in the world and how you always manage to make everything brighter, Y/N.” He continued talking.

“I love everything about you; the way you speak about things you like or dislike, the way you react when I bring you your favorite food, I love how you’re so curious about my work and projects even though you’re not even a science major.” Lucien’s chuckles caused you to shake into his arms surrounding you.

You bit you lip while hearing all the things he had to say about you, slowly cheering up and forgetting the heaviness in your chest.

“Y/N… I’m not sure what caused you to feel like this but… Let me remind you just how much I love you and how much you mean to me… I know I’m not able to solve all the things happening inside that little head of yours,” he bumped lightly your forehead with his index finger in a playful tone. “but I want to be beside you through all the process, from the beginning and until the very end, I want to be with you.”

You raised your face from his chest with shyness, getting your eyes up until they were on his. You could not ignore all the love his eyes were spilling, you felt almost hypnotized by looking at them.

“…So… Will you let me love you until the very end…?”

His face leaned closer to yours as he spoke, waiting for a response from you -either physical or verbal-, so he could finally give in and close the space between you two.

You nodded, not sure if your voice would be ready to talk again, but you knew it was better if you externalized your feelings with words:

“Yes… I want to love you too until the very end… Lucien. Thank you.”

The black-haired man with his face still just a few inches away from yours, smiled with relief and love as he leaned forward and, instead of placing the kiss in your lips you were expecting, he landed his lips softly on your cheek.

“I love you, Y/N.” He whispered in your ears, tightening his embrace.

#mlqc #mlqc lucien #mr love queens choice #mr love queens choice lucien #lucien #evol x producer #love x producer #mlqc lucien x reader #angst #fluff #otome games #mlqc simon #mlqc x reader #lucien x reader #mr love queen's choice x reader

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shiningjoy · 4 years ago

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so i’ve finally watched s3 of free! and i wanted to put my thoughts in about it and hopefully also get some ppl to reply (respectfully) with their own input? also sorry if my knowledge of free seems spotty or incomplete since i don’t obviously have all free lore burned into my head so pls inform or correct me on anything i’m missing!

anyways before even watching s3, i noticed it was pretty widespread that s3 was rather disappointing or at least fell short to s1&2. and not only that, but i could see that s3 was likely going to be a bit disappointing just bc of how many less ppl were interested in it or even knew about it (ofc popularity=/=good but i doubted that the loss in numbers was just bc time had passed) sadly, the season actually exceeded my expectations of the worst.

first of all, i think way too many characters were introduced without any need of them being there. ofc not all of them seemed worthless to being there, but i think at least half of them didn’t have a need of being there (or at least didn’t need to appear as much as they did) or they could’ve at least waited to introduce them. don’t get me wrong, i loved characters like isuzu and albert, but with how little they appeared or added to the plot, i don’t think they were necessary at all. they introduced so many characters and kind of tried to forcefully endear them to us but it just seemed really shallow and random. i was really uninterested in the new iwatobi hs sc tbh (i love rei and nagisa, but i just don’t feel anything for the new members tho it was funny how the new manager is interested in fat instead of muscles) i don’t think isuzu was worth introducing, but i do get why they introduced albert at least. he was supposed to serve as their first rival introduced strictly from the professional world, and to emphasize there are many people above them not just in japan but the “world stage” but i definitely think they could’ve waited on that until the free 2021 movie tbh. plus i felt that any conflict he brought to haru was resolved within 1 maybe 2 episodes so yea they definitely didn’t really need him bc he hasn’t had much impact (yet) if anything, they could’ve just had him briefly appear at that training camp haru was at to race him and beat him to remind him that he still has a long way to go to get to the top. but all other appearances of albert were so extra and unnecessarily emphasized how inhumanely talented he was (the arcade scene, the thing with the chopsticks,etc) it just felt like really weak foreshadowing

also, the main conflict in s3 was just way too prolonged and solved unsatisfactorily. first of all, i don’t know why the blame seemed to be shifted by ikuya and hiyori almost solely to haru, like yes he was the one who quit first but it wasn’t an attack specifically to ikuya and the rest of them left too, so they should’ve held more grudges on haru makoto and asahi rather than just haru (or if anything at least have more blame on asahi bc makoto at least talked to ikuya beforehand) like did he just forget asahi also made a promise to not move away? honestly from the content they gave us, i’d argue that asahi and ikuya were actually closer than how ikuya and haru were, since i feel like most of the latter relationship was based on ikuya admiring harus swimming.

second of all, hiyori was another character i found so unnecessary and just weirdly protective over ikuya. he repeatedly gets in the way between them and ikuya when ikuya never said he didn’t want to talk to them (and it’s not like talking to them is gonna give him a health relapse) and so he just seemed to be there to prolong the conflict between them which was irritating. not even natsuya, ikuya’s actual brother, was that obsessive over him so i really don’t get hiyori. even sousuke, who was actually friends with rin before haru and the others were was not that possessive over rin, and there was actually pretty good reasoning why he had a grudge against haru (he didn’t see haru taking swimming as seriously as rin and thought that would cause him to hold back rin who looked up to haru, and was jealous that haru who had the talent to swim the world stage with rin wasn’t taking advantage of it when sousuke wanted to but couldnt bc of his injury) and like what right did he have to say to haru that his swimming hurts others when it didn’t even affect ikuya negatively (instead it inspired him and led to him wanting to swim like haru) like how haru originally thought it did to rin and how it did to asahi in high speed 2?

third of all, like i said before the way they solved the conflict between ikuya and the rest made little sense. like yes harus swimming is magical but i don’t get how swimming IM with him could instantly solve all the problems between them. (ik that it was based on the promise they made to race each other but i’ll get into that part and how shallow it felt later) if anything, i think what would’ve been more impactful was something happening to ikuya that made him realize that he can/should rely on/trust others, (maybe a more serious accident?) and enjoy swimming with a team and not just alone since his personal conflict was that he thought swimming alone was better than swimming with others when actually he was lonely (at least it was in starting days). and that wouldn’t even have to be with haru and the others that he learns that lesson. it could be with his own university team and hiyori, which would give hiyori a much better purpose of being there. (or they could’ve just not had him exist) if they were so inclined to have closure between ikuya and the other boys by having them resolve ikuyas personal conflict, i feel like it should’ve been at least haru AND asahi (maybe even makoto too but idk how thatd work when he’s no longer competing) racing him in the same race (if not them doing a relay but i guess they didn’t want to make it too obvious than they already were that they were just recycling the plot of s1 (lol)) if anything i think they could’ve even waited for them to reconcile while they were on the olympic team, but ig kyoani didn’t want to wait that long to reintroduce ikuya and wanted to use s3 to warm ppl up to the idea of ikuya being on the olympic team which they didn’t do very well considering how bad the development was

also what was with ikuya saying he swims his own way while obviously taking sm inspiration fron the way haru swam? it was so contradictory and even as kids haru told ikuya to swim his own way when ikuya told him that he wanted to be like haru and he understood that obviously but didn’t apply that to his actions at all? and i’m surprised haru was ok with ikuya blatantly copying him when i vaguely rmb that he’s been shown to get annoyed with even makoto when he seemed to be doing that?

another fault in having all these characters was that haru’s actual personality seemed to be taken away for the sake of these characters.

they wanted to establish a deeper relationship between ikuya and haru, but it just seemed so off the way they went about it in free! haru promising ikuya to race him just felt so ooc to me and had little emotional impact tbh bc of the lack of reasoning i felt haru had to agree to such a thing besides him promising ikuya that just bc he asked rather than bc he actually wanted to race ikuya. (while it took rin weeks to get haru to warm up to him and then agree to the relay, and seeing the process of haru getting used to the idea then openly enjoying swimming with the others was really touching) i think they just added that to make harus quitting have more impact on ikuya but i don’t think it was necessary at all when they already made plans with the rest to swim the relay again and win. if they wanted to make it seem like ikuya and haru had more of a one on one relationship with each other they should’ve gone into more about how haru saw the same darkness in ikuya that he did in himself like in high speed 2. make them bond over their similarities since i’m pretty sure ikuyas purpose as a character is to give haru a rival that is like how sousuke is to rin is; which is being rivals while being two of the same person. (in contrast to haru and rin who are very different and are rivals that inspire each other) but the way they try to establish the relationship between ikuya and haru pales sm in comparison to sousuke and rin that it’s a bit laughable, even more so in those occasional moments where they try to act like ikuya can measure up to rin’s impact on haru

another much more obvious event where haru’s character is forced to act ooc for the sake of the establishment of another character is with albert. yes, haru has grown a lot from the beginning of the series and has gotten a lot more open, expressive, and friendly, but that’s mostly just to the friends around him, but that’s not even to all of them (he still seems to find kisumi irritating and in TYM tries to leave at the sight of him lol) so him noticing, randomly approaching a stranger he doesn’t know a single thing about to help them order food and then even going far as to have lunch with him was the most blatantly ooc thing in the season. i think he may be polite enough to help him order his food but i don’t get why he even noticed albert in the first place. they should’ve just left him noticing albert to be at the practice race. like i said that scene was just there to emphasize albert’s skill with the chopstick thing but i think saying he was the world record holder and also being way ahead of haru in the race was already enough

besides haru’s character, another character i felt they did wrong was makoto. besides the plot of s1 being recycled, s3 makoto seemed to just repeat the development he went through in s2. by the end of s2, he already establishes that he wants to coach swimmers. and at the end of s3 he comes to that same realization but acts like it’s something completely new to him introduced by nao that he never thought of before?? the only difference was that he said in s2 he wanted to help kids realize how great swimming is, which was sweet and suited his personality, but in s3 he says he wants to do it for athletes on the world stage. tbh i like either way, and the latter one would help him be able to stand with rin and haru who in s2 he was afraid of being left behind by (hence why he swam the free against haru in s2) but saying that being an olympic trainer can also help him inspire kids and show them swimming is fun makes no sense. choose a path you want for the character already and make it consistent does he want to help athletes in the world stage or does he want to help kids fall in love with swimming? bc i doubt any kids pay attention to the coach or trainers in the olympics rather than the actual athletes so that reasoning like i said didn’t make sense.

and after haru lost what i think was the 200m (?) free at the All Japan Invitational, i found it weird that they had makoto there after to talk with haru and rin about the race? idk to me it just feels like it’s tradition for it to end up just being rin and haru talking when they’re struggling with swimming (in s1 was their fight in front of the tree that looked like the one by their elementary, in s2 it was the australia trip) his presence didn’t even feel necessary either, he just randomly interrupted the moment by saying his future plans after haru had that angst yell lol. it felt like just an appeal to mh shippers which is not a good enough reason at all

the last point i can remember at the moment is that the ending was so underwhelming. i don’t understand why they couldn’t have shown the ending to rin and harus 100m free race when the movie trailer already confirms that they’re going to the olympics. why cut to albert watching them on the tv?? all this build up to not even show the results of it? I think this ending really just confirmed that s3 was so unnecessary and just there to warm ppl up to the olympic movie but not actually give us anything good or plot moving

anyways sorry for this dump. besides all these criticisms, i want to say there were parts of it that i enjoyed, i just didn’t go into it bc this post is already so long, and me bagging on ikuya was not hate; i actually like him and the only time i teared up in s3 was in his race with natsuya lol. i’m afraid that at some parts i may have not expressed my thoughts exactly so please don’t be too harsh if you engage, but i’d love to hear other ppl’s analysis of s3 and the characters as well !!

#was this shitshow really just bc of the new director?#utsumi pls come back to direct free!#free!#free! dive to the future #haruka nanase #makoto tachinaba #ikuya kirishima #free! anime #rin matsuoka #hiyori toono #rinharu

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chisinpink · 4 years ago

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The Only One: A Mastermind!Nagito AU Story - PROLOGUE

Hello lovelies, I’ve posted a *lot* about my Mastermind!Nagito AU on tiktok (I’m @chisben there as well if you wanna check it out), and I rly wanna share it here so here’s the prologue! Special thanks to @servanthaji for helping out with the planning of this whole story in general!

(Content warning for mentions of bombs and bombings, swearing and crying.)

☘️

JUNKO: Yep, that’s the day that it happened. The day everything started getting… pretty scary, if you ask me! I’m just glad you were outta town for that, and baby was home sick. That’s, like, the only reason she’s here today, too!

HAJIME: Wait, wait, slow down! What are you even talking about…?

JUNKO: Uhh, I’m getting to that? Besides, don’t you know that guy too? Nagito Komaeda?

HAJIME: Not really… I mean, I knew of him, but I was in the reserve course. I didn’t really talk to him or anything until I went to school that Monday, and… there was nobody there except him.

JUNKO: Oh, yea? Did he tell you anything?

HAJIME: Not really. After I got shot at and ran in the school, I asked him what the hell was going on, but it was like I wasn’t there either. He just changed the subject to hope over and over again, like I asked a totally different question, and eventually I just walked away. I still don’t know what he was doing there.

JUNKO: Then maybe he doesn’t want you to know, y’know? You’re so lucky you have me, then~!

(She smirks playfully. Hajime stares at her blankly and her face drops. She stares at a map with a pen in hand.)

JUNKO: Come ooon, I’m coping! This is pretty stressful for everyone, y’know, I use humor to forget about all this stupid shit.

HAJIME: Whatever… just… tell me what’s going on.

JUNKO: Well, what happened that day… that was the start of The Biggest, Most Awful, Most Tragic Event in Human History… in my opinion. And that’s saying a lot, because this world is filled with despair! And, like, his whole class helped him do what he did to the country! No idea why that is, but we can all fill you in on the rest, I guess. Preeeety sure we were all there in some way, ‘cept my baby.

(She gestures to the entirety of Class 78 of Hopes Peak Academy, standing and sitting in the basement of the school, as well as Mikan Tsumiki, who has a timid smile on her face as Junko looks back at her. Hajimes face drops.)

HAJIME: Wh… what?? That can’t be it, that can’t be what happened…! The whole class?? The whole country?!

JUNKO: Eeeyup! They evacuated the school by putting a bomb under their teachers desk, and apparently all around the school, and I have NO idea how that lady didn’t croak! Anyways, everyone had to leave, and… that’s basically all I know. They just repeated that ooover and ooover on the news, it made me sick!!

(She threw her pen at a tiny radio propped up on a few cardboard boxes.)

HAJIME: Wh… this doesn’t… but… but, I...

(Kyoko steps forward and faces Hajime.)

KYOKO: I have some more information on what happened that day. After we were trapped here in the basement, all we had was the radio to inform us of the true nature of what happened. This is what I wrote down from those broadcasts.

(She hands Hajime a folder that contains three sheets of paper, all three of them hand-written notes. He begins reading.)

KYOKO: The class of 77-B was, most likely, all apparently under some sort of drug-induced psychosis. Most witnesses reported that they were acting strangely or out of character before they planted the bombs, and their eyes were hazy and…

HAJIME: ”swirled”, “mixed”, “terrifying”, “comforting”, “light and dark” ...none of these make any sense.

KYOKO: My thoughts exactly. This entire event is bizarre and without any logical reasoning behind it… if you’d only heard about it on the news. But I think Makoto and I know more than any news outlets.

HAJIME: How?

(She looks over her shoulder to Makoto, signaling him to stand up.)

MAKOTO: Well, about a month ago me and Kyoko were going to one of the computer rooms to print something, but it was kind of out of the way, so we didn’t expect him to be there. N-Nagito, I mean. We saw him talking to Chihiro, and, uhm… I didn’t hear that part.

(He looks up to Chihiro. They stand meekly and fold their arms.)

CHIHIRO: H-he had been asking me to collaborate with him on a personal project, but… I didn’t have any spare time, and I didn’t even know him that well! So I finally just told him no, and he left me alone for a day or two… but t-then…

(Tears form at the corners of their eyes.)

CHIHIRO: H-he told me that… he was gonna… destroy the sc-sc-school if I didn’t-!

(They cover their face, and Makoto reaches out to rub their shoulder.)

MAKOTO: It’s not your fault, Chihiro. It’s nobody's fault but his. B-but anyway, after we heard about that, we decided that we had to keep an eye on him, but… basically the next day is when the bombs went off.

HAJIME: Why didn’t you just… tell a teacher what he told Chihiro?

MAKOTO: In hindsight… yeah, that would’ve been the safest thing we could’ve done. But Kyoko thought that we couldn’t keep an eye on him if he was expelled for that, a-and he could have been doing anything at home, so we fo-

KYOKO: Makoto, please, don’t. I was a coward, and I didn’t trust anybody else to investigate the matter. This whole situation could have been de-escalated dramatically if I had told school faculty.

(Kiyotaka stands from his spot next to Mondo.)

TAKA: You DIDN’T inform a teacher, or the Headmaster?! Miss Kirigiri, the school faculty always knows what is best for us!!

MONDO: Yeaaaah, is that why they all jumped ship and fucked off to who-knows-where so we could fight like dogs in the basement?

AOI: Hey, they did what they could, okay?? They had to protect themselves like everyone else! We’re not any better by hiding in the basement.

MONDO: Where the fuck ELSE were we supposed to go?? Candy land?!

YASUHIRO: Hey hey hey, Chihiro was right to lead us here the day the bombs went off! But I hear ya, maybe we coulda moved out of Japan together or somethin’ instead of hiding in Japan!

TOKO: I-I see why you’ve had to retake this year as m-much as you did now, you dumbass! He could b-be expanding anywhere now!!

BYAKUYA: As much as I hate to agree with her, I do. Nowhere is truly safe, and for all we may know, we’re being actively searched for. It’s only a matter of time before we have to relocate.

SAYAKA: I-I can’t stay here another second!!

CELESTIA: Oh, so do you two suggest that we run out into the streets and expose ourselves to the predators? Play Nagitos game of cat and mouse?

LEON: Hell NO, I’m not playing that freaks game! But if he’s got his little possie out there looking every which way for us, then we gotta at least try and delay it!

SAKURA: On the other hand, we don’t know what they might want from us, if anything, or how bad the situation has escalated since we decided to hide.

HIFUMI: We don’t even KNOW what’s out there w-waiting for us anymore?! There could be giant mutant spiders wanting to turn us into baby food by now! I’m staying right HERE.

YASUHIRO: ...okay, I’m officially lost. Are we moving or staying?

SAYAKA: Moving!!

BYAKUYA: If you all intend on surviving, then you’ll all relocate. If you intend on being brutally murdered, then by all means, feel free to stay for a bit longer.

LEON: What in the actual fuck is wrong with you??

MAKOTO: H-hey, everybody calm down!!

SAKURA: We cannot make a decision until we know more about the outside world. AOI: But isn’t it because of what we don’t know that we have to go out there by now?

SAYAKA: Maybe some of us could go and some of us could stay?

TOKO: W-what if that reveals the hiding spot f-f-for everybody else??

MIKAN: (wiping away tears and hiccupping) N-nooo!!

YASUHIRO: Then we all have to come to the same decision, then.

CELESTIA: Yes, good luck reaching a peaceful consensus during the middle of an apocalypse!

BYAKUYA: I never said that it had to be a peaceful decision. If needed, you will all follow me kicking and screaming so I don’t perish thanks to your idiocy.

MONDO: I’ll knock some idiocy into ya if you keep runnin’ your mouth like that!

TAKA: Remember to take deep stomach breaths, bro! I think we can all solve this by utilizing a popular vote!

HIFUMI: But wouldn’t whoever’s the most popular win anyway??

HAJIME: SHUT UP!!! EVERYONE JUST SHUT UP!!!

(Everyone stops talking and stares at Hajime, who’s trembling and has his face in his hands.)

JUNKO: Daaaaaaamn, rookie’s kinda bold to be screaming at us like that, huh?

MAKOTO: Junko… you’re not helping. He’s obviously overwhelmed and you’re just teasing him.

JUNKO: C’mon, I’m nowhere near him! Hahah!

(Makoto sighs, sitting down next to Hajime on the floor. The rest of the students talk amongst themselves.)

MAKOTO: ...I’m sorry. I know you didn’t ask to be here, but… for what it’s worth, I’m glad that you’re still alive somehow.

HAJIME: …

MAKOTO: You know… when Mukuro found you unconscious in that class, we all thought you were one of Nagitos’ friends. You seemed too peaceful in your sleep to have been running from anybody, or hiding from anything.

HAJIME: ...then why did you help me?

KYOKO: We thought we could get some information about the outside world. But apparently, you're just as lost as the rest of us.

MAKOTO: A-and because we didn’t want to leave anything to chance. Even if you were one of his people, we didn’t want you to just be out there. I’m glad that you weren’t, though… it feels nice to meet someone new again.

(Hajime lifts his face from his hands, palms and face covered in tears. He looks at Makoto with a faint smile.)

HAJIME: Yeah… feels nice.

☘️ TO BE CONTINUED☘️

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killbaned · 3 years ago

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regardless of what he’s mixed with, the reason any future dog i get will never be another rufus, aside from That’s Not How Dogs Work is just because so much of his personality has been shaped by the severely fucked up things that have happened to me/us since i got him.

which, frankly, will be a good thing for any future dog(s) i have. rufus is reactive and distrustful of strangers, especially men because of chris being a fucking explosive abusive dick. he’s a lot better now than he used to be, and even though i get nervous if there’s too many people out when i’m walking him, he’s still made a lot of great strides in the time we’ve been at the apartment.

like the other night there was one of the stray cats at the end of the sidewalk, and he was boofing a little loudly, but really it was just ‘don’t like that shape in the dark up there, what the fuck is that’ boofs, and he’d boof a little and then go back to trying to find a place to poop.

which is a huge improvement over ‘i have to bend down and hold him by the collar because he saw a cat and lost his mind’ from a few months ago. he’s not overly reacting if people walk by most of the time, provided it’s not someone catching us off guard or a kid sneaking up on us and scaring him.

but it’s nice, in a way, to know that any future dog(s) i have won’t have reactivity stemming from stress of a volatile living situation. that’s also the other reason it will be a long time before i get another dog; i was 15 when i got rufus, and had no idea my health was going to take the nosedive it did in my late teens and early 20s and while i will and have literally dragged myself out of the house while pissing blood to take care of him (walks, getting food/vet visits, etc), i can also say there are times when i am simply so tired and in so much pain and it kills me to have to do so.

i also didn’t know my living situation would get so rocky as it did for a while with moving from place to place after leaving SC, all the trips back to SC, etc, that was a lot of changes and no adjustment times for him, so before i get another dog i want to know i will be somewhere stable and as stress free as possible for them.

it’s just kind of, idk, bittersweet i guess, to know all the bad things that shaped rufus’s personality won’t happen for/to a future dog while knowing that despite all of it, those things in his personality are what make him such a good dog ;;;;;

#rufus #goblin shenanigans.txt #honestly his vet keeps telling me he's perfectly healthy so logically im like will you stop worrying about this so much #but on the other hand he's going to be 12 soon and i'm like aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa #maybe it's bc my first dog went into kidney failure when he was only 7 and wasn't around long after :(#also i think it's bc darby as never REALLY 'my' dog #he was supposed to be but mom got cancer within the first year we had him so he spent a lot of time with her #while that was going on. so really he was more hers than mine.#rufus however has always been undeniably mine and in fact simply tolerates everyone else.

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miqojak · 4 years ago

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Layers Upon Layers

one: outside layer

[Name:] "Jak." [Hair Style & colour:] "Black and orange. I wear it pulled back and braided." [Eye Color:] "Gold and jade green." [Height:] "Fuck if I know exactly. Under five fulms." (4'9") [Style:] "Depends on the day. Maybe the hour. Leather and mini-skirts are always a good bet, though. Sometimes a nice suit, sometimes my bike gear, sometimes a little something more form-fitting, elegant and gilded - 'desert chic', I suppose." [Best Physical Feature:] "Definitely my ass...though my legs cut it close, on that one. What do you think?"

two: inner layer

[Fears:] "You ask that and actually expect people to tell you?" (Small/enclosed spaces with no readily available exit, levin, Garleans, people getting too close to her/seeing who she really is) [Guilty Pleasure:] "People feel guilty for what they like? Who's going to judge me, the sheep who can't come up with a single original thought of their own, and feel guilty if they do?" [Biggest Pet Peeve:] "Biggest...that's tough, actually. Probably blithe optimism, or naivete. People too ignorant, or unwilling to ask questions and look deeper - or those simply unwilling to face hard truths. There can never be any growth if you aren't honest with yourself, after all. Unmotivated slackers. If you have no goals, why are you wasting this star's air?" [Ambition for the Future:] "To be feared and respected in equal measure. I've been pushed around for a long time, and now it's my turn."

three: thoughts

[First Thought When Waking Up:] "Probably...my to-do list for the day? That or wondering what the weather is like, and whether or not I'll be going on my usual morning run or be stuck working out indoors. That or 'Huh, they haven't killed us all yet.'" [What You Think About the Most:] "What my next step is in life - how I want to pursue that power I'm after without compromising who I am...and how the fuck I ended up with someone who actually cares about me in my life while distinctly trying to avoid that type of thing...and why he stuck around. I wonder about the 'why' a lot." [What You Think About Before Bed:] "Depends on the day, and what's happened, and if I'm headed there alone. If I'm not alone, it's probably something to the effect of 'I still can't believe he wants to be here/wants me to be here'. And whether or not I'm alone...there's always the nagging, ugly reminder that Garlemald's towers sit hunched in the sky, ready to end everything for everyone - predator and prey alike. It could be the last night for any of us." [Your Best Quality Is:] "My ass. But other than that...well, I'm honest, and my loyalty can't be bought. I'm not a good person, but I have my own...'code', in a sense, I guess."

four: what’s better

[Single or Group Dates?] "Group dates sound like a punishment. I can barely stand the slack-jawed idiots around me as it is. Though undoubtedly the punishment would be upon the others, considering who my date would be, and the fact that we'd probably spend the time verbally destroying the other couple." [To be Loved or to be Respected?] "Respected. Love without respect is horrifying. I've been there, I've suffered it, and I'm still recovering. But I still...don't know that I believe in love. At least not how most people do, I guess. Love makes people do stupid shit when they believe in it. Respect doesn't. Respect can stand alone, without needing love. Respect has to be earned. There's no claims of 'respect at first sight.' But like I said...love without respect is...ugly. Scary, even." [Beauty or Brains?] "Both, or no deal. Brains are essential, but I can't have a walking pile of dogshit on my arm, now can I?" [Cats or Dogs?] "Neither, I don't do pets - animals are food. But...I suppose I'd say dogs, though you'd probably incorrectly assume cats, based on the fact that I resemble one. But...there's been more 'canines' in my life in the last year or two than I care to recall."

four: do you…

[Lie?] "No. Not unless the situation is dire - my morals don't matter if my life is on the line. Survival comes first always." [Believe in Yourself?] "Much more than I used to. I've accomplished, and survived, more than most could even begin to imagine." [Believe in Love?] "Not...really? Maybe? Though I'll admit that for all my vehement denial in the past, someone has made me re-examine my emotions in the last half a year or so. I don't think I believe in the sort of 'love' that the general public believes in. I had someone force his fairy tale romance down my throat and do me a lot of harm both physical and mental with those ideals, as he forced me to be someone I wasn't. If adhering to what society expects of love is all that someone cares about - hitting the expected gestures as told in fairy tales? That's about as real as a fever dream. I don't like the word 'love'. Not what it's come to be associated with, and what's expected of you along with it." [Want Someone?] "For the first time in my life...yes. Not that I don't 'have' him as much as I can claim such, but when he's not around, I find that I want him to be. So...yes?"

six: have you ever…

[Been on Stage?] "No? I mean, my organization does run a jazz club, and it's been various theaters before that, and I've...sat on the stage, basked in the spotlight of an empty theater? I prefer to be...less in the actual spotlight, however." [Done Drugs?] "I've only been clean and sober for...maybe a year now? So yeah. I've...done a lot of drugs." [Changed Yourself to Fit In Somewhere?] "I've been a con-artist to put food on the table, but I don't believe in changing who you are to 'fit in.' If you don't fit in...you don't fit in. You are who you are. Being anything else is a lie, and does you a disservice. It's also a pathetic cry for attention - for the other bleating sheep to accept you into their herd. I won't debase myself to 'fit in' with my lessers."

seven: favorite

[Favorite Color:] "Black, white, gold, and red. I don't have just one." [Favorite Food:] "Once more, I don't have just one. I like red meat, I like seafood, and I enjoy rolanberries quite a bit. Of late, I think my current favorite snack is takoyaki though - this fried dough ball with octopus inside...just thinking about it makes my mouth water." [Favorite Game:] "Breaking and entering."

eight: age

[When Your Next Birthday Will Be:] "No idea." [How Old Will You Be?] "No clue. I'm...twenty and four summers, roughly...give or take a couple." [Age You Lost Your Virginity:] "Care to lose yours to one of my knives, here?" [Does Age Matter?] "Should it? I suppose I'd be a bit baffled to see an old geezer with a hot young thing, but even so...who cares? I haven't exactly had a lot of lovers, but I don't think I ever asked any of them their age. So long as people stay the fuck away from kids, it's a non-issue in my opinion."

nine: in a partner

[Best Personality:] "An unflinching realist who not only faces the truth, but deals it out themselves. Ambition, and the ability to be honest with themselves about who they are." [Best Eye Colour:] "Who gives a shit? If I find them worthwhile, I'll like their eyes, I assure you." [Best Hair Colour:] "Who's out here checking people off a list because their hair is the wrong color? I mean, after some shit I went through, I might not want to ever see another red-head again, but realistically...who gives a single fuck? I think you're asking the wrong questions here. People often do - too busy dwelling on lust at first sight." [Best Thing to do With a Partner:] "Murder? Crime in general? ...Or a hot bath."

ten: finish the sentence

[I Love…] ...I just told you I don't do love. But...I do love the sun." [I Feel…] everything at once, or nothing at all, it seems." [I Hide…] who I am." [I Miss…] my family." [I Wish…] ...wishes are for simpletons. Actions achieve what you want." Thanks for the tag: @eligos-venator @placesyoucallhome @bek-sc @sundered-souls (I think I found you all who tagged me!)

I am late to this party! Tag yourselves if you want to do it, so I can read your stuff! I feel like most folks have done it, and I'm too brain-dead atm to root around in the bowels of Tumblr to see who hasn't, since I'm many days late! XD

#thanks for the tags!#layers #when she has an opinion #she has an OPINION #sorry if she rambles at times #layers upon layers #she's touchy about some inquiries too

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queerchoicesblog · 4 years ago

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The Movie Party (SC Titanic, Zetta x Adele Series, Ch. 17)

So, folks, the SC Titanic Zetta x Adele Series has come to an end: this is the final chapter. It’s time for Zetta and Adele to have a reunion at last.

I want to thank all those who supported this crazy project of mine. This series has been quite important and will somehow still be, even if the original story is no longer available and it’s the end. But I will be grateful to the authors who crafted it: it was one of the few times I felt truly seen as represented as a wlw in a game.

You must forgive me if this chapter will be a bit longer but I wanted to bid a farewell to the various characters who made this story one hard to forget. It’s the finale: you either go big or go home, right? And you will find the explanation of the title of the series, if you haven’t figured it out already...

Little disclaimer-favor: especially since the tags don’t seem to be working anymore, if you do enjoy it, please consider supporting the author & sharing this. A little gesture that means a lot!

Stay tuned next week for the Epilogue!

Zetta x Adele Tag: @storyscaped @storyscapefanficarchive @marmolady @animus-and-anima @hayley-carter19 @escako @everlastingchoices @indescribablechoices @ahrielstuff @bornonawdnsday @nazario-sayeed @h-doodles @adele-serda @marlcasters @brightpinkpeppercorn @michelleconnoly @charliejane-blog @ghost-of-yuri @choicesgremlin @lanzhansguqin @orange-elephants @wonder-falcon

Zetta x Adele Series Tag: @eternal-langdon @nydeiri

➡️ Ch. 1, Ch. 2/1, Ch. 2/2, Ch. 3, Ch. 4, Ch. 5, Ch. 6, Ch. 7, Ch. 8/1, Ch. 8/2, Ch. 9, Ch. 10/1, Ch. 10/2, Ch. 11/1, Ch. 11/2, Ch. 12, Ch. 13, Ch. 14, Ch. 15 , Ch. 16

___________________________

The night of the Surviving the Titanic premiere, I walk into the venue at the arm of Richard, my little Napoleon in tow, 'fashionably late' as my fiancé puts it. We are greeted by the flash powder and shouts of the reporters and the awe of the guests gathered in the dashing foyer, waiting in line to show a steward their invitation. I wave at them, smiling and searching the crowd, while Richard tips his hat. Sadly, I do not see any familiar face or I don't recognise any before we walk past them and disappear behind the red velvet curtains of the auditorium. Another steward takes care of our coats while a colleague leads us to the honorary seats reserved for us and the rest of the crew.

We seat and wait. To keep my mind busy, I fix Richard's bow tie leaning to the side. I chat a bit with Sabine and compliment her outfit once again: I'm touched she decided to wear the pearl headband I gifted her when I made it into the movie industry. A birthday gift: she kept repeating she couldn't accept a gift like that but eventually I prevailed. Seeing it again after all those years...I'm so grateful she didn't listen to me and refused to bring it with her on our trip to Europe: "I'd rather not, Madam: I don't think I will have occasion to wear it", she said. I'm incredibly happy she deemed this night a right occasion. I'm so used to see her in her maid uniform that I forgot how she looks in an evening gown and the little detail makes her look like the friend she is to me. I'm pretty happy and proud of my outfit too. I picked it myself: I knew exactly what I wanted when I commissioned it to a New York fashion designer à la mode. I don't usually wear black, I much prefer colors, but lately I've been reconciling with it. And it seemed appropriate for the night: black is the color of mourning, right? What is tonight, this movie if not a commemoration of all those who aren't with us tonight, all those who sacrificed their lives for people like me and all the other survivors we managed to trace back, gathered here tonight? I'm not naive enough to ignore there is more to it, something less poetic, but I hold onto the remembrance of the lives lost. Onto that night: I hope the meaning of my sapphire necklace, the same one I wore on my birthday night, is not lost to those who were there. A hand on my shoulder, a gentle touch. As my heart races a bit faster I turn...but no, it's only my colleague, my fictional sister greeting me at the arm of John, Richard's right hand. I kiss her cheeks and invite the two of them to join us. She is visibly excited when she announces that the foyer is packed: she had never seen a crowd like that. It's a delight to hear but I can only hope in that crowd are a few familiar faces I long to see. One dear face I desperately long to see. One last time, at least if that's what it must be but I need to see her, to make amends and tell her the truth. She must know: I owe her that. When the stewards eventually open the velvet curtains, the auditorium fills fast, women in fur stoles and men in tuxedo swarm in like bees, chatting lively as they take a seat. I stretch my neck to see if I can find her face but my eyes only meet tycoons, socialite and strangers. Is that man over there checking the night programme Felix? I certainly hope so: if he's here, Lawrence must be too. And God knows how I need him tonight. After what feels like an eternity, it's time. The premiere begins. "Here goes nothing" Richard sighs, taking my hand into his as they dim off the lights. I wish I could have spotted Adele before darkness fall on the auditorium and the projector starts crackling. Apparently, uncertainty must torture me a bit longer.

As story unfolds on screen, I hear the audience hold their breath in awe and fear and for a moment I am reminded why I love my job: to give people feelings, to make them live lives they would never live even if for a fleeting moment. Their wonder, their tears of sorrow and joy are the best reward, the only reward I look for, even more important than the generous checks I receive for my performances: it makes me feel alive, it makes me believe that for a moment our hearts beat at unison and we're connected. When my character and her sister hug in the lifeboat and watch the sinking ship, the muffled sounds and sniffling around me tell me that no matter how hard performing that scene was, the message got trough. I am incredibly happy about this.

After the screening and a round of thunderous applauses, stewards lead us to the theater lobby. I have a look around while reporters and guests join us. Richard insisted to take care of the decorations and the whole movie party himself...well, with his staff: he claimed that he had asked of me too much already and he was happy to help and give Sabine a few days off. My little Napoleon was taken aback by the decision: she has always supervised every party, every mundane event. I look at her and I have to stifle a laugh at her unimpressed face. She's right: just like the picture, the decorations aren't grand enough, not luxurious enough and I have no doubt she would have done so much better than this. There isn't even music... I hear the clinking sound of camera and flash powder igniting and before I know it, a bunch of reporters are taking pictures. I put on my best smile and pose with Richard. When he agrees we offered enough coverage of the events for the moment, he guides me away from them towards a waiter in high uniform offering champagne glasses. He hands me one and takes one for himself. "To our success, to our night" he smiles, rising his glass. I repeat his toast and we cling glasses. I have just tasted the cold alcoholic sweetness of it that guests approach us. I do my best to be polite and charming: I know it's my duty even if it distracts me from my most important search for my love. Is she even here? Maybe she just tossed my invitation into the fireplace after my disappearance...oh, no, I don't wanna picture such thing! And I know it's selfish of me, maybe even my note was selfish...it probably would make things easier for her if I disappeared and let her live her life, if I let her forget me soon. Strip away the memory of the time we shared together like a band-aid. Maybe even engaging romantically with her was selfish of me in my situation...oh, I'm tormenting myself again! Focus, Zetta, focus! The guests profusely compliment and comments are awfully predictable: the jewelled wife of a well known mogul dramatically claims that the picture was "a true masterpiece" and she totally felt "as if she was there too that night". A young socialite nods and echoes her words: is she her daughter? I flash them a smile and say I am overjoyed to hear so, it was the effect we were hoping for. I am stuck into conversations like these until the party is in full swing. My head almost hurt at the insane amount of stale nonsense I hear: maybe Lawrence was right when he once said that the problem with fiction is that the audience hardly takes it as such and cannot distinguish between documentary and fictional movies. They will go to bed tonight truly convinced they know what we survivors felt that night, they will tell friends encouraging them to go see the picture (hopefully) but the truth is...they know nothing. They have no idea how terrifying it was, how gruesome. They have no idea what suddenly not knowing if you or your dear ones will see another dawn or hearing gunshots and screams of terror all around you feel. It's like ice flowing into your veins instead of blood, a clutching fear I will never forget. Their heart would have broken in a thousand pieces too hearing the despair in the voices of the poor souls swimming in the frozen water begging for a help that never came. Maybe this picture was a mistake after all, I don't know. I keep jumping from one conversation to another, peering across the crowd gathered on the balcony and below but I cannot spot anyone I know. Instead, a young man out of the blue asks me news of James: they're acquaintances and he was hoping to meet him here tonight. I sense Richard tensing up at my side as he sinks his glass of champagne. He was on the ship too, the young man continues, is he alright. I have no idea if the rumor of what happened at my birthday party has spread or if it faded away after the tragedy so I offer him a quick smile. I conceal how his reminding me of my fallen little prince is making my wound bleed again. James is fine as far as I know - I tell him - but sadly couldn't make it tonight, a previous engagement he couldn't postpone. My merciful lie seems to be enough for him as he tips his hat and asks me to bring him his greetings. As we part from them, I excuse myself and head away from the crowd "to fix my hair and rouge". Thankfully, Richard understands. He takes my glasses and places a quick kiss on my temple, whispering that it's alright, he will cover for me. He winks at me before greeting a colleague. I make a beeline for the restroom to catch some breath: I'm starting to feel a bit overwhelmed by this party but I must be patient, this night is nowhere close to be over soon. I take a deep breath, one last check and return to the lobby.

At the corner of my eye, I finally notice a familiar couple quietly having a drink in a defiled spot by the railing. Friendly faces, at last! I call their names and they turn. "Here's the belle of the ball!" Lawrence exclaims, approaching. He is charming as usual: he takes my hand and gallantly raised to his lips, smiling. He still looks tired and older than he actually is. I pull him into a quick hug. "You came, you old dog!" I joke, making him laugh. "And you too!" I wink at Felix who blushes slightly. When we part, I throw the two of them a look that - I hope - will convey my deep affection more than my words can. "I am incredibly happy you are here tonight" I smile softly. "We were incredibly happy to receive your invitation to the party, dear Zetta" Lawrence twists my words with his kindness. I take a look at him and flash him a sheepish smile. "You hated it, I know" He sighs before laughing, a gentle laugh. I speak again before he can formulate an excuse. "I can only hope I made up for it. My performance at least, the champagne..." "You were magnificent, Zetta. As usual" His smile is genuine, affectionate. Sweet dear Lawrence... "Tell you what, I had to give the gentleman here my handkerchief in the finale" he adds, a playful yet equally affectionate smile on his lips, nodding to his companion. Felix sighs, shaking his head. He cannot refrain a smile. I laugh and hug him. "That is such a great compliment, thank you, darling!" He's always been a big fan of me, he notes and Lawrence is quick to confirm it. We share a long look, quiet, safely away from the loud crowd. When will I see the two of them again? "Lots of people here tonight" Lawrence comments, after a moment, his blue eyes roaming the lobby packed with guests. "Yeah..." I sigh. "Yet you are the first friendly faces I bump into tonight. Well, apart from Sabine. Can you believe it?". I'm not surprised that he understands the unsaid. I'm relieved, actually: concealing my vulnerability but not to the point a man like him cannot sense it, underneath my words. He shares a quick look with Felix before reaching for my hand and giving it an encouraging squeeze. "Maybe it's just because you got stuck with those socialites in high hats and furs and embarrassingly expensive jewels" He winks at me and I laugh, a liberating laugh I needed so much. "Maybe" I concede before adding, hesitant. "I don't even know what I should hope for, Lawrence". He considers my words and when his eyes meet mine again, I don't want to let go of his hand. I want to hold onto him. "The night is not over, right?". I smile weakly at him: he's right but I have no idea if it's a good thing or not. Maybe it will only mean my agony is far from ending anytime soon. He seems to be reading my own thoughts. "Chin up, dear Zetta. And if you need us, we will be downstairs. Just say the word" Sometimes I wonder what I did good to have a man like him being so kind and thoughtful with me. I nod and try to recollect myself. I wish I could stay with them a bit longer but I see reporters approaching and a proper host cannot disappear forever. Sadly I must go, they know it. After one last lingering look, I take my leave. Evading the reporters is a lost war, so I surrender and pose again. How many pictures do they need, goddammit? Oh boy, this flock of vultures wants statements too. Fine, I know what to say. Marvel at how many people gather here tonight, tell how important this movie is to you, how you hope it will help bring along the memory of the tragedy...and start over. Then, with nonchalance and a charming, unreadable smile, walk away. Thank God, it works. I look for Richard or Sabine but they are both nowhere in sight. I shake hands with a couple of New York socialites when I hear a voice behind me calling my name, quietly almost shyly. I turn and see a young woman in a floral dress, red hair in elegant waves and big green eyes looking at me in awe. "Miss Serda, I just wanted to thank you for your invitation and say how flawless your performance was tonight". I flash her a smile. Have we met already? I cannot tell... "Did you enjoy the picture?" "Yes, quite a lot! Even if it's not the same, of course..." she lowers her eyes as if ashamed to anger me with such an undeniable truth. "Were you on the ship?" I inquiry, in my most reassuring voice. "Yes" she nods. "I was..." she pauses before shaking her head, a brighter smile relaxing her face. "Actually I was Adele's cabinmate. Your secretary's cabinmate, I mean". I gape and take a better look at the redhead in front of me. But of course! I saw her on the deck with a Adele as we were playing shuffleboard with the Baron. I tell her so, hoping to make her happy. It works, apparently: she looks pleasantly surprised I remember her. "You're...Clorinda!" I exclaim, reminiscing Lucille's words at our dinner, when she recognised Adele's dress as one of her own creation, a gift to her favourite model. She laughs, but her laugh is weak. "I was Clorinda, yes". "Lucille sang your praises during our journey" I smile. "Will I see you soon at her upcoming show?". "I'm afraid not, Miss Serda" her lips twist in a pained smile. "I no longer work for Mrs Duff-Gordon". Seeing my surprised face, she continues.

"I had an accident during the sinking. I am no longer suited to work as a mannequin" she explains, quickly lowering her eyes before meeting mine again and adding, cheerfully: "But it's alright. I am here, I am alive and I am in America...it's all that matters, right?". We smile weakly at each other for a moment. I feel sorry for this girl even if she seems stronger than she looks. "Adele talked of you" I tell her and I'm glad to see the mix of surprise and excitement on her face. "You're the big fan of mine who kindly borrowed the posters and memorabilia for my birthday party at the Cafe Parisien. Seeing the old and new posters, reading the little notes you wrote...it meant so much to me, truly. I have never had a chance to thank you properly but I will always remember your kindness to me". A hint of red spreads over her cheeks as she smiles a big bright smile. "Oh, it was nothing, Miss Zetta...I was honoured to give my humble contribution to your birthday. If it made you happy, I'm happy, overjoyed!". I laugh softly at her contagious enthusiasm. Adele told me it was quite endearing and she was right. Her cabinmate speaks again, still gleaming but recovering the initial shyness. "Miss Serda, I was wondering if I could...well, if I could get your autograph? I was hoping to ask you during the crossing but then.." "But of course!" I smile and beckon a steward over. When he's back with a promotional picture and a pen, I look back at my fan. "What name should I write?" "Oh, Lena. Lena Montague but Lena is just perfect". I write my dedication and hand it to her. She takes a step forward, limping a little, and I get a glimpse of her wooden leg as she looks down at the picture with reverence. "There, for you. And your new collection, maybe" I wink.

She thanks me but I insist that it's my line. And a sudden idea crosses my mind. "Thank you for coming, Miss Montague. I am glad I got a chance to make your acquaintance. And I was wondering...I remember expressing the wish to invite you for breakfast after being informed of your lovely gesture, to thank you. Would you accept a belated invitation? Let's say next week?". I have never seen such starry eyes on a face of a fan. "And who would be so foolish to turn down an invitation from you, Miss Serda? Sure thing!" "Excellent! I'll send my maid to you then, she's here somewhere...enjoy the party, Miss Montague". I kiss her cheeks and offer her one last smile before going back to my guests. I search Sabine but I find Richard instead, who introduces me to a couple of survivors he shook hands with. It doesn't take long before I realise why he wanted me to meet them: they say they were on my lifeboat and it was thanks to my intervention that they survived that awful night. They will be eternally grateful. I...I don't know what to say. I see Richard smiling proudly down at me while a faint blush spread over my cheeks. I tell them I am sure they would have helped too if the roles were reversed and wish them a happy new life in America. As they part, I finally spot my little Napoleon approaching, imperturbable as the Sphinx, quietly observing the stewards moving from one side of the hall to other. You can take away her apron but not her inquisitive gaze, I suppose: no rest for Sabine... "Ah, here you are!" I greet her, before teasing her. "I feared I lost you in the crowd" She offers me a quick amused smile. "I wasn't lost, Madam, just mingling. An impressive crowd tonight, n'est pas?" "Beyond our wildest expectations, yes!" Richard confirms, eyes roaming the upper floor.

"I am glad to hear, Monsieur King. A well deserved success" my maid bows her head, concealing once again the disappointment for not being involved in the party setting. Then she turns towards me and continues, with a nonchalance that is only pretended. I know it quite well... "By a fortunate coincidence, I bumped into Miss Carrem just a moment ago". I can only hope my face doesn't betray my feelings, the turmoil her words provoked inside me. Adele is here, she came. I will get to see her at least one last time, I will talk to her. My words will be a poor consolation to her maybe but...I will see her again. "Carrem...Carrem, Carrem...oh right, your secretary on board, huh?" Richard exclaims but I barely register what he's saying. All I can think of is Adele, Adele here, tonight. Oh God, thank you! "Oui, precisement" my little Napoleon confirms on my behalf as I cannot speak. "An exquisite young lady, if I say so myself. The best candidate we had in ages, Monsieur, and I am not easily impressed, I assure you". Richard says something about how he would love to make her acquaintance and thank Miss Carrem personally but I am not listening just like the night of our arrival when he was stroking my hand but my head was far away with he woman I foolishly a abandoned at the pier. "I left her in the main hall downstairs. She's with her sister" Sabine adds, addressing me. Snapping out of my reverie, I manage to remind Richard that I talked a little about them. They were on my lifeboat too, we stayed together on the Carpathia...but I am extremely grateful to the providential steward who beckons him over. He sighs and excuses himself, saying he will be back before we know it. As soon as he's out of earshot and someone else interrupts me again, I wrap my arm around Sabine's and lead her to the side, by the railing. Now that Richard is gone, I can show my concern more freely. To some extent, obviously but I think I am safe with my little Napoleon.

"How is she? Did she look alright?" I inquiry, checking over my shoulder. Sabine ponders her words, as if thinking how to describe the impression her brief meeting with Adele left on her. After what feels like an eternity for my tormented heart, she speaks. "If I may, she looks...troubled". I knew it, I feared so. But hearing it put down into words makes me frown. "Troubled? But of course...what a fool I have been! I shouldn't have invited her here tonight, I should have visited her and-" But I can't bring myself to finish my own sentence. "Troubled with grief, I mean. With with the weight of what happened that night. Mourning, you would say, perhaps". Then she sighs, a deep sigh, shaking her head. "It's such a pity to see a young woman like her taking the world over her shoulders, all that sorrow, all that pain". "She wouldn't be Adele if she didn't" I smile, thinking of every time she spoke of her fight for women's rights, the days she spent in jail for it. My sweet revolutionary is indeed a little Atlas and I fear no one can change that, it's simply her nature. But it pains me to see her so miserable and I cannot shake away the feeling that my disappearance played a role in it. At the very least I added salt on her injury. "But Mademoiselle Carrem is strong" Sabine interrupts my somber train of thoughts. "She just needs time, that's all, I think. Time and a little joie de vivre, don't you think, Madam?".

I smile sadly at her words. "Don't we all need it, ma chére Sabine? A little joie the vivre...". Yes, it certainly would be nice. But is it even possible? Even for people like me and Adele or are we forced to be content with cheap surrogates that keep us floating on the water surface? I wish I had an answer... "I will go talk to her" I sigh, straightening my skirt. "I am sure MademoIselle Carrem will be delighted to see you, Madam". "I hope so, Sabine". Yes, I do hope so. We look at each other for a moment before I speak again. "Oh, before I forget...would you mind getting Miss Montague's address and find out when I can meet her for breakfast next week or so?" I ask, nodding at my fan's figure in the hall downstairs. "And book a table to the Plaza or the St Regis. They're both fine...oh and please, send Miss Montague a poster of Surviving the Titanic. I'll ask Richard to sign it too". I fill her in about the details of Lena's life before the sinking and her troubled arrival: the incident, the loss of her job and the end of her modelling career. Sabine bows her head. "Certament, Madam". "In the meantime, I'll see if I can find a way to do more. I wish I could do more for her, somehow" I continue, lost in my thoughts. My little Napoleon nods and goes quiet, pondering. Around us, the sound of laughters and clinging glasses. When she speaks again, she almost startles me. "I'll be on my way" she announces, standing straighter. Before taking her leave, she looks at me and comments quietly that it has just come to her mind that I still haven't found a new secretary since our arrival. I know that look, that pretended nonchalance once again. As Richard approaches, I give her arm a gentle squeeze, a faint smile crossing my lips. "Go find Miss Montague, Sabine. And not a word on this before I speak to the girl". She throws me a conspiratorial look and walks away. When I turn, Richard is offering me his arm. "Fancy a trip downstairs, darling?". "I thought you never asked!" I smirk, wrapping my arm around his.

As we start walk down the stairs, I can feel my heart beating faster in my chest at the thought of my proximity to Adele, how close we are after all this months...even if it's also different now. But it doesn't matter: I don't want it to matter now...what did she say on the deck of the sinking ship? ‘All I care about is that you're here with me, and safe’. Yes, that it's all I care about too. I...saw her. She's with Hileni by a small table with hors d'ouvres and a pyramid of champagne glasses. Be still my heart, I beg you, be still...but it doesn't listen. I cannot control it anymore now that I know for sure she's here. She's wearing a green dress that it or just perfect for her but it enhances her beauty, if it's even possible. Oh, Adele...you have no idea how badly I have missed you! I feel my face lighten up and my lips curl into a bright, happiest smile. See what hold you have on me, my love? I don't even pay attention to those who greet and part as I walk by: I only have eyes for one guest now, for her. The first who spots me is Hileni: her eyes widen at the sight of me. I suppose she has never seen me in all my glory before; on the Carpathia, even if I was still wearing the outfit of my birthday party underneath the coat a kind fan gave me, I was out of my element just like the rest of us. Adele turns a moment later, following her sister's gaze. When our eyes meet, I almost feel my knees get weak. I hope she can see that this smile is meant for her only. I think she does, she brightens up almost immediately I turn towards Richard. "Will you excuse me a moment? I want to say hi to a dear friend I haven't seen in a while...". Dear friend: the euphemism is an insult to what Adele means to me but it will do. Just like the fiction, it's what the world can take. "Sure, go ahead. I'll go find John" he smiles, parting. I immediately glide over to my love, heart racing in my chest. "Adele"

I call her name and the sweet sound of her name fills my mouth. I place my hand on her upper arms and kisses both her cheeks. Restraining myself from pulling her into a tight embrace and linger in that closeness is a Herculean effort. Her perfume, the shade of red spreading over her cheeks, her shy smile. How I missed you... "Let's you and I catch up" I say, still smiling so brightly. I turn to Hileni and ask: "Mind if I borrow your sister for a moment?". She nods, still looking awed. Without hesitation, I take Adele's arm and lead her to a corner of the room apart from the other guests. For a moment, none of us can't find words. Funny how words are most difficult to find with those who are dearest to our heart. But I know what it is...I feel it too. The weight of our past between us. The memory of our brief happiness together.

A last, I summon up enough courage to finally speak. "Ad-" "I-" We start talking at the same time, then burst into laughter. Look at us, two fools lost to love! "I feel...almost nervous. Ridiculous, aren't I?" I keep my smile on but I know, just know she sensed the vulnerability reverberating in my voice who has suddenly lost the confidence I had before with my guests. She smiles too, gesturing that it's alright. "Zetta, it's...so good to see you again". I am sure my mind now is less cheerful. Time for my poor apologies. "I'm sorry, Adele. I should have written or visited" I sigh. "I've just been so busy..." To my surprise, she interrupts me, understanding, smiling. "I understand. You've been making the film, and you're getting married..." But she suddenly lose the train of whatever else she had planned to say. Adele, you and I can try to behave normally around each other, to act as if nothing happened...but we simply fail all the time. Our feelings always get in the way, my love, and God knows if I don't know it too well. And this, this sadness cutting off your words is all my fault. "I know you're upset" I frown.

She meets my eyes again in a silent, unnecessary apology. You have nothing to apologise for, I do. And I owe you the cruel truth, at last. I take in a deep breath to steady myself and let my mask fall. I drop my voice to a whisper so that only she can hear. "I've been agonizing over what I'd say when I saw you. And I never came up with a good answer". Adele, if only you knew the nights I spend writing you the most ardent, sorrowful letters! "I love you. I want to be with you. But this marriage has to go forward or my career's done". Do you understand my impossible position, my dearest? But please, I beg you never doubt my feelings. "Doubt thou the stars are fire, doubt the sun doth move, doubt truth to be a liar...but never doubt I love". When she speaks, her voice is a pained whisper and her words an excruciating plea. "Zetta, please don't do this. I want us to spend our lives together". I couldn't ask for anything better, sweet Adele, but...there is always a cruel but for us. "Even if that life had to be kept secret?" I grimace. "If people knew about us, it would destroy everything I've worked for". Look what malicious rumours brought on Lawrence and Felix even without a solid evidence of their relationship. Look what the world does to people like us. These guests, my adoring fans crowd the movie theaters to see me fall in love with the hero, the dashing heartthrob 'every woman daydream of' without asking me what I really want. They smile and awe at me tonight but they wouldn't hesitate to drag me down into the gutter if they knew who my heart truly belongs to. "I...I can't have both you and my career".

I lower my eyes unable to sustain her gaze any longer. I am so incredibly sorry, Adele, so sorry.... She reaches for my hand, shyly, and I am reminded of the first time she took my hand into hers in my private projection room on board of the Titanic. The soothing warmth of her hand over mine felt so intimate, calming...just like now. I look back at her and I have to fight back tears. She looks over her shoulder then she speaks, her voice low. "I don't care if no one knows about us. All I care about is that there is an us. I need you, Zetta". My eyes widen as I register the meaning of her words. Does she...does she mean it? "Are you sure?" I ask her, unsure whether she is fully aware of what she's proposing. "This won't be like it was on the Titanic, bathhouses and stolen kisses. It won't be easy..." She searches my eyes and nods. I...I would have never thought nor hoped for such a hopeful end of this conversation I feared so much. Oh my dear...not losing Adele, being with Adele! Out of instinct, I move to kiss her but I refrain myself just in time, painfully aware of the surroundings. I must long for your lips a bit longer, my love...but it doesn't matter, we're together now. "We'll need to come up with a plan..." I consider. "How do you feel about being my publicist?". "About as confident as I felt about being your secretary" she beams. I laugh as I laughed with her in the most dire moments...incredible what a light she casts on me, even when I am at my lowest. I regard her fondly as a newfound sweet joie de vivre starts spreading inside me, and I put my hand to her cheek. "This is the happiest I've felt in months...knowing you'll be at my side" I whisper, my voice trembling with the swirl of feelings taking hold of me. "Always" she whispers back, slightly leaning to the touch.

Suddenly we're both brought back to the party by the flash powder igniting around us. As I unwillingly retrieve my hand we're surrounded by journalists shouting my name. I am too overjoyed by our sweet reunion to be annoyed by them. I wish they could have forgotten about me a bit longer, granting me more time with Adele but they are oddly bearable this time.

I see her leaning closer and putting her mouth to my ear. The words she whispers send my heart fluttering.

"I love you". I turn my face to meet her eyes. I must summon every ounce of strength I have to stop myself from pulling her mouth to mine, pouring my affection on her right in front of the photographers. I see the same restraint in her eyes. There will be other nights for that. Yes, there will other nights... "And I you" I whisper back. My voice is soft, adoring...how could I not adore her? I smile at her one last time before turning to the cameras and bathing into the flash lights. They better capture this moment, I think: I will never be as radiant as I am now. As they keep calling my name and taking picture of me posing, I slowly return to the party I momentarily left for my reunion to Adele. I spot Richard and John lightening cigarettes by the staircase and not far Miss Montague chatting with a man I have never seen before. Sabine is checking herself in a mirror, fixing her headband...a rare moment of vanity for her. Hileni is pondering whether going for the pastry mignons is a bit too much and once saw me looking at her, she shyly waves at me and walks away. To my delight, Lawrence is signing an autograph to a fan, under the proud gaze of Felix, who took a step back. Good old Lawrence... ‘Sometimes our secrets are what make our lives worth living. No matter with what high cost they come attached’, he said. And he was right. I used to repeat to myself that you can't breathe if you're constantly underwater. It turns out I was wrong. With her love, I can breathe underwater.

#titanic storyscape #zetta serda #adele carrem #zetta x adele #zetta x adele series

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something-tofightfor · 4 years ago

Note

HCs please!! Ryan + odd jobs / SC Billy + coffee / Ink Logan + snow / Caspian + swimming / John + “fixing” something / Sam + surprise

Oh, multiples... here we go.

Ryan’s lifestyle before meeting you requires him to work a ton of odd jobs. He doesn’t often stay in places for long, but when he chooses to, he tries to find something that he’s never done before to give him life experience - there are diners everywhere, places for him to work as a short order cook or a dishwasher ... but what he really likes is learning new things. We know about the boat in Alaska, but what about the road crew in Texas?

Ryan spent a spring and a summer one year when he was about 22-23 in Texas, working for TxDOT, and while it was one of the hottest periods of time he’s ever spent anywhere, it was well worth it. Why? He worked for Austin County, and got to attend South By Southwest while he was there - as an artist. He didn’t care about all the corporate bullshit, but instead spent the days that the festival ran making his way between musical performances and talking to the artists and other people that were just there to watch.

But the best part? He and Cowboy and Ginny played the festival, the two of them coming in from another part of Texas for a few days - to check on Ryan, and to play. Sure, it was a tiny stage tucked behind a couple trees by the river, but they had a crowd of about 20 people for their whole set - and it’s how he met Georgie. Even though they went their separate ways after the event ended; Ryan getting back to work, and Georgie heading out on a train, it was the beginning of one of the best friendships that Ryan has.

Steel City Billy and coffee. Hmm. Billy got used to drinking shitty coffee in the desert when he was overseas, so one of his indulgences is, in fact, coffee. He prefers to drink it black most of the time, with half a teaspoon of sugar. He likes strong coffee - the stronger the better - and hadn’t ever touched a cup of decaf in his life. Before his workouts, Billy drinks straight black coffee - a small cup - just to kickstart his metabolism.... not that he really needs it, because he’s always in great shape, but the energy helps. One of Billy’s favorite coffee memories was after spending a night at the Castle house, he got up before anyone else and made a pot. When Frank poured himself a cup, he couldn’t even drink it, and accused Billy of making it too strong.

Ink Logan and snow ... he doesn’t see a lot of snow living in California, BUT as an escape after your trial’s over, and once you’re feeling 100%, instead of asking to go to the beach (which you do, still) ... Logan whisks you off to his place in Aspen for a week in the middle of winter. There’s no interruptions - no phone calls, no Delos business, no reason to worry, and it’s time where the two of you can relax, unwind, and finally talk through everything that’s happened and been said since the William Fiasco. He didn’t tell you he had a place in the mountains, so when you got there, it was a surprise to you ... and after seeing the look on your face, Logan was happy that he’d kept it a secret. The mornings that you spent walking through the woods on his property, evergreen trees surrounding you and the snow beneath your feet are some of his favorites from the entire time he’s known you.

Caspian swims... like a lot. And he’s a really strong swimmer, having learned in the ocean nearby the castle. He understands currents, understands the tides, and knows how to keep himself and anyone else he’s in the water with safe. In fact, people think that Caspian likes being on the ship more than he does on land, and that’s only partially true - Caspian likes being in the water more than just about anything else. His crew is used to him springing from the deck and into the sea unannounced, and though the first few times it happened, they worried, they don’t anymore, because to them, it’s just Caspian being Caspian, and not the King of Narnia being reckless.

He taught you how to swim in deep water - patiently, helping you learn to trust the currents and your body, and though it’s somewhat improper for Narnia’s queen to put on a pair of breeches and one of her husband’s loose shirts, again, it’s one of the things that the crew turns a blind eye to... because it keeps both of you happy.

John, bless his heart, has the right idea, but often gets way ahead of himself. For example, growing up, he and Hilda used to play inside the house, which drove Veronica MAD. It wasn’t because the kids were having a good time, it was because John didn’t realize his own strength or speed or level of clumsiness, and lots of things ended up broken.

Like the table leg, which he used flour and water to “glue” back together, and then propped up with a stack of heavy books. Or the dishes that he and Hilda used to create towers on the kitchen table, and then ended up breaking when John’s knee knocked into it as he got up to get more. Those pieces, they didn’t even try to fix, instead they tried to hide them in the back of the large fireplace, beneath the ashes.

Or, how about your bedframe, which John broke after jumping into it with you one too many times ... and then broke again after repairing it himself instead of asking for help (at your request, because you didn’t want him to have to approach anyone with such a scandalous case of a broken furniture item)

Sam Adams actually likes surprises, especially when they’re meant for you Even though things have calmed down slightly in the wake of the signing of the Declaration and the following events, he’s still very busy, meaning that he has about a million and a half things on his mind at once. But he doesn’t ever hesitate to bring home a small bouquet of flowers after long days of meetings, or to stop at the bakery and bring you home a treat if he passes it. He also tries to bring you a small gift - glass bottles, new buttons and thread, candles - every time he’s away ... as if seeing his face walk through your front door isn’t enough of a welcome surprise.

#ask something-tofightfor #character headcanons #headcanon #ryan brenner #samuel adams #king caspian x #john whittaker #logan delos #ink logan delos #steel city #steel city billy #ryan brenner headcanon #samuel adams headcanon #king caspian headcanon #john whittaker headcanon #logan delos headcanon #billy russo headcanon #thanks for asking!!#the-blind-assassin-12

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trashcankitty12 · 4 years ago

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Timmy Headcanons

(Sorry for the wait, life, am I right?)

Timmy Somerville. Cute nerd, badass strategist, and most likely one of the smartest dudes you’ll ever meet.

Poor dude doesn’t always get the recognition he deserves, so here it is. I hope.

(Also, I took the name for his hometown/home city from the comics.)

(Also, these headcanons are mostly for my main verses. “Left” and “The New Company of Light”.)

-Timmy is from Zenith, more specifically, the City of Titania, Zenith’s Capitol.

-It’s just him and his mom and dad, and their robo-cat, Chester. (Timmy named him after a character from his favorite game series.)

-Timmy doesn’t have many family members, as both his parents are also only children and both sets of grandparents live in the warmer climates of Zenith. (There are like… Two or three warm cities/villages in Zenith.)

-But his parents do have lots of friends that are sort of like his ‘aunts and uncles’. (And they spoiled him like they were his family.)

-Honestly Timmy is a bit spoiled as far as family love goes. They have always been supportive of his projects and are just so proud of him.

-He tends to be closer to his dad than to his mom. His dad was more of a stay-at-home dad (he ran his business from home, which was game designing), and his mom worked as a hotshot lawyer on Zenith. (Mostly for copyright claiming and patenting.)

-His dad always let him playtest his games (assuming they weren’t for more mature audiences, Timmy was a bit of a sheltered child about those subjects). And Timmy… Well it started Timmy’s love of them.

-As he got older and more into the mechanics of game design, mechanic-ing in general, his parents let him start using his room as a workshop.

-He used to take everything apart he could get his hands on, and then would put it all back together, good as new. (And sometimes, better.)

-His parents used to suspect he may have some techno-magic because of how the machines responded to him, but they never could prove it.

-(To this day, even the others in his squad question if Timmy has some latent-magical abilities. He tries to laugh it off, but he has found himself wondering too… Even to the point of trying to summon his magic. So far, nothing.)

-His vision started going bad around the time he turned 12. He was averse to getting glasses at first, but his run-in with contacts didn’t go so well… So glasses. (Which sucks when you wear helmets, but he’s come up with specialized helmets for people like him with poor vision. It just took some time to create. And for his mother to help with the copyright and patents.)

-Timmy had braces for a short time after an incident in elementary school messed his mouth up.

-(Dodgeball at Titania Prep was cut-throat. Cut. Throat.)

-Timmy also has an allergy to seafood. Which sucks, because he likes the smell of fried fish and the sauces that come with shrimp… But if he eats it, he can’t breathe and he’d just rather not deal with that.

-He was actually a pretty popular guy at his elementary and middle schools. He was the guy who had access to first-rate games before anyone else did, and he got to have the latest in technology. (And could explain it without it being boring.)

-So how did little Timmy decide to go to Red Fountain?

-His middle school hosted one of those fairs that shows off different high schools that someone could go to. There was Zenithian Prep, which was connected to the main college of Zenith, Zeni Tech. The Eraklyon Institute. The Callistian Artistry School for the Aspiring Youth (what a mouthful). Coventry Academy for Witches and Wizards. And Red Fountain.

-Timmy had been wanting to go to the prep school, just as was expected of him. But Red Fountain just… Spoke to him. He wanted to be different. He wanted to be more than just ‘the smart Zenith kid’. He wanted to standout somewhere. And he kind of liked the idea of the adventures Red Fountain offered.

-So he started his training for the entrance exams. Thankfully, Chester could easily be programmed to be an exercising partner and couldn’t be easily swayed to deviate from the course.

-Granted, the physical part of the exam was hard, but Codatorta saw something in him and personally vouched for him to join the program.

-Timmy’s parents were shocked at first, but since Timmy got in and had expressed such a want to go, they approved and signed the necessary papers. (With the promise that Timmy would bail if it became too much for him. No shame in realizing something wasn’t for you.)

-Not gonna lie, adjusting to Red Fountain life was a bit hard at first, but once he got into the routine, it was second nature.

-Granted, he was never as physically fit as Riven or Sky or Brandon, but he could hold his own in a fight.

-Hand-to-hand fighting isn’t his strong suite, but he is tenacious about it and isn’t afraid to exploit weaknesses his opponent has.

-Thanks to his hand-eye coordination skills from playing video games, he’s actually really good at aiming blasters and performing with a bow and arrows.

-Piloting is his favorite though. He loves getting to ‘play with the ships’ and getting to work on them and fly them around. It’s just… He loves it so much. You guys just don’t understand.

-Please don’t ask him to fight with swords or shields or spears… He does his best and he could hold his own… But it’s just not for him. (He doesn’t have the upper-body strength to really fight and hold up the weapons too. At least, not for long periods. He does well enough just to get passing marks.)

-Strategy is another strong suite of Timmy’s. He loves plotting and looking over maps and creating the battle strategies. (Maybe, just maybe, it makes him think of the Magical Dimension’s version of DnD, but he won’t say that outloud to anyone but Tecna.)

-He also sort of liked the war game drills Red Fountain ran. And the off-world training exercises.

-And okay, he wasn’t a complete fan of the camping trips, but he did have his favorite camping moments. Like bonding with his squad-mates and getting to know more about the people around him.

-(And getting to learn more about people other than Zenithians. Despite being the tech giants of the Magical Dimension, Zenith doesn’t really communicate much with the rest of the realms. So this was a great experience for Timmy and he got to share his adventures with his family who also loved hearing about them.)

-The Sky/Brandon thing did hurt him though. Like he found out early-on who they really were because they weren’t as discreet as they should have been at Red Fountain. But the fact that they didn’t just come to him and admit to him who they were kind of stung. Especially since he was supposed to rely on these guys to be his ‘brothers-in-arms’.

-His crush on Tecna happened early-on too. When he first met her, she made him so nervous and he just couldn’t believe that he was talking to that Tecna Mode, daughter of the owners of Mode Inc., and he just… Almost lost his cool. (Okay he did lose it, but she laughed and joked and that made it so much more bearable.)

-(And the fact that after they started dating, his parents fell in love with her too, just sealed the deal for him.)

-He does tend to go to Helia and Brandon for romantic advice. He knows Tecna loves him as is, but he wants to continue being able to make her feel special and keep the warm-fuzziness going.

-When she was thought to be dead in Omega, Timmy had a full-on meltdown. He went to her memorial at Alfea and he cried like a baby to her parents. He apologized at least half a dozen times to them. But he swore to them he’d bring her back. Alive. Somehow. He swore it.

-It didn’t matter that everyone thought he was crazy or delusional. Tecna was alive and he could feel it. And so could Digit. And if anyone would know if Tecna was really dead, it’d be the damn pixie she was bonded to. So she had to be alive.

-And damn, when he did see her again, when they finally made it back to the ship in one piece… He almost couldn’t bear to let her go. He basically let Helia fly the ship back so he could spend the entire flight holding her. (And she let him, despite not usually being one for PDA.)

-After that, he texted her nearly non-stop for a month, just be sure she was still there. That it wasn’t a dream he’d had. Thankfully, it was all true. She was safe and back at Alfea.

-Timmy has a poor sleep schedule, despite having been training for early morning drills at RF since he was 14. When he’s working on a project though, nothing will stop him from finishing it. (Unless the others literally pull him away.)

-(Which has happened before. Riven will literally just scoop up Timmy and take him to his room and plop him down and be like ‘sleep or I’ll knock you out’.)

-Timmy has a small case of tinnitus due to blaster use and working on the RF ships.

-Timmy also runs mostly on caffeine. Coffee, energy drinks, soda. You name it. (Helia and Nabu have been subtly trying to remove the caffeine over the years, but Tecna keeps enabling him… Or rather, enabling them both since she also runs on caffeine.)

-Timmy has tried his hands at poetry. It’s not the best, but it makes him feel great to work on writing and Tecna absolutely loves the poems he writes for her.

-Stella and Timmy have secretly been working on uniforms for soldiers/cadets in training. She wants them to be a little more stylish and he has some ideas on how to better protect the person wearing them. (And maybe add in some heat/air condition stuff. Those things are super temperamental.)

-And Layla has been helping Timmy stay in shape since they all graduated and moved to Earth. (Well, temporarily relocated to Earth.) She knows he’s slacked a bit on training since he hasn’t been at RF, and he needs to keep on his toes.

-He likes Earth okay, but he has to fight his need to fix everything to be on par with the rest of the Magical Dimension. (Please Bloom? Just one car? Or maybe a computer? Please? Please?)

-Timmy loves when they have game-night at the loft. Even if it tends to end in screaming matches between Stella, Riven, Musa, and Tecna. (So many super-competitive people in one place.)

-He has discovered that he makes the ‘best sweet tea’. At least, according to Bloom. (He doesn’t understand her or what this ‘sweet tea’ is… He’s honestly just pretty sure he ruined a thing of tea… But hey… Earth is weird.)

-Timmy hopes that after all of this ‘saving the magical dimension’ stuff is over, he and Tecna will get to live a quiet life. Or at least one where their inventions and games blow-up and they get to bring joy to others’ lives.

-(But first, the Magical Dimension needs to stop needing to be saved. And like hell that’ll happen.)

#winx club au #winx club #winx club timmy #winx club headcanons #winx club timmy headcanons #revenge of the nerd

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dear-yandere · 4 years ago

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May i ask your opinion relating to the tumblr writing community dying? Well you see when you are an anon sending request to a writing blog, what is the area of too detail and too vague and the area between them? This is something that is kinda troubling me. I found out that writer dont like thing that is too vague or too detail. And when they decide to delete it and not write it, it PROBABLY make us think that our req not appropriate, which then discourage us to ask another req and not involve with the blog only reading.

I dont know about vague, but i know my own short-coming as an anon who probably send ask that is too detail (which i why i dont ask or request, just read). I have a particular taste or genre (i divide the nsfw from sfw and know which is appropriate) I send the ask so that the blog have more genre or they can write a fic/hcs/sc that is based on my idea so that other people can enjoy. (I found another anon whose request that they think is too detailed, so they kinda say to write it yourself) If you ask why dont you write it yourself, what if the asker is not good at writing, not good at the characterization, or doesnt know how to have a good writing format. And thinking the writing blog is an outlet to share their idea that they can not write to the fandom .

Please think about how an anon or an asker feel if they actually give a critic or an opinion that is not a praise (not a harrasment) to a blog that have a lot of followers and another writer friends. I would not want to be ganged on.

And also sending request to multiple writing blog (which i didn't do since i found that writers dont like that) this is from my pov as a requester or non-writer that run a blog, but what if they send it because they thought that their req is erased so they send another one to another blog to write, but the other blog thought that is a requester who sends to multiple blog because they are friend with the first blog?

I'm sorry this is so long. I just thought giving a comment to that post since i like to read fic in tumblr. Maybe i can give an insight or another side to look at. If there is something that i am wrong at, please be gentle with me and no cussing. I prefer to have a civiled discussion. Sorry if i offend you or something or that i sound annoying. This is just an opinion.

ahhh there’s a lot to address here, so i’ll answer it one by one.

i’ve heard mixed opinions on this from different writers. some writers prefer detailed requests so they can understand exactly what the anon wants; other writers prefer vague requests so that they have creative freedom to write whatever they want. writers aren’t obligated to fill requests, so they could delete the request for reasons besides it being vague or too detailed; if you’re unsure if your favorite writer prefers vague/detailed requests, don’t hesitate to ask!

some blogs avoid specific genres, so if you send an ask so that they have more of that genre, your request is probably less likely to be filled. for example, i’m a yandere blog, so i tend to stray away from fluff or comfort ideas; i do sfw, but i tend to prefer more nsfw ideas, whether it’s a lewd idea or otherwise (gore, taboo topic, etc). in other words, i’m less likely to fulfill a non-yandere or overly sfw idea (ex. “character cuddling reader”) than i am to fulfill a darker or more nsfw idea. it’s up to writer preference.

for the writer who told the anon to write it themselves, i kinda get it? most writers prefer to have creative freedom, so if an anon sends the story they want in such detail, it’s basically already written. i totally get why someone might be unable to write it themselves, but if a request is that long and detailed, it’s probably better to ask the writer if they accept detailed requests first. or, check if they accept commissions, especially since writing a specific idea can be really mentally taxing and difficult!

i’m sorry if this has happened to anyone... i personally haven’t seen it, nor do i know anyone who would gang up on someone for offering feedback. however, not every blog wants opinions / critiques on their work. a great deal of blogs do, but that doesn’t mean every writer does. again, always ask first, or check their rules.

in general, writers don’t like when anons send the exact same request to multiple writers, especially if the anon didn’t even change the wording. it’s very rude, and it makes writers feel like they’re machines / expendable. my suggestion is to personalize the ask to the blog you’re sending it to, or at least change the wording and mention that you sent the same idea to other blogs and you’re curious what [this writer] thinks too.

i hope this clears some things up. this ask was in response to my interactions post, so i want to reiterate that none of these should deter you from interacting with a writer, even if you only leave a “i like this!” or some emojis! i totally get that interacting with writers, especially bigger writers, can be scary, but the thing is, there won’t be any more writers to interact with if they feel they aren’t being seen.

anon 2. Hello, saw you post about writing community is dying. It's not, tumblr has the worst ask box and it does show ask box on the app :( Please if you have Twitter, or Istagram or others. Please put a link to them. T.T I beg of you T.T

what does my social media have to do with the writing community dying? also, how is it not dying? i asked around, and the ask box seems to work, so maybe it’s just your app? gosh this ask is so confusing... i still can’t wrap my head around why you’d want my social media. i can’t really upload my fics to them...especially instagram and twitter?? anon i’m so lost...😢

#questions #not a fic #vanya rambles

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snkpolls · 4 years ago

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SnK Episode 64 Poll Results (for Anime Only Watchers)

The poll closed with 60 responses. Thank you to everyone who participated!

Please note that these are the results for the Anime Only Watchers’ poll. If you wish to see the results for the Manga Readers’ poll, click here.

Anime only watchers, beware of spoilers if you venture over to the manga readers’ poll results.

---

RATE THE EPISODE 53 Responses

The poll closed with 54 responses. The overwhelmingly positive response to the season continues, with 97.9% of folks giving it a 4 or higher and not a single person giving a rating less than 3.

10/10 acting, atmosphere and music

MAPPA couldn't have done a better job. Inhumanely impossible. 20/10.

Just pure hype

Amazing episode, one of the best in the entire series.

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING MOMENTS WAS YOUR FAVORITE? 53 Responses

The overwhelming majority of respondents enjoyed the last scene of the episode, with Eren transforming in the basement and assaulting just as Willy formally declares war on Paradis. Behind the climactic moment, the rest of the favored scenes were various moments throughout Eren and Reiner’s conversation prior.

WHICH INTERPRETATION (BY RBA) OF THE OLD MAN’S STORY DO YOU THINK IS CLOSEST TO WHAT THE MAN ACTUALLY THOUGHT? 54 Responses

The Old Man’s story and its motifs have been present all throughout this season, so it’s interesting to see how people see it. When it comes to understanding the Old Man’s thoughts specifically, the plurality (46.3%) agrees with Bertholdt’s interpretation. Others (35.2%) see more to Annie’s idea of the Old Man’s final thoughts. Only 18.5% believe that there’s little use in predicting what’ll never be known.

IN THE SAME VEIN, WHICH OF THE AFOREMENTIONED INTERPRETATION FITS REINER’S STATE OF MIND IN THE BASEMENT SCENE? 54 Responses

In that same vein, the plurality (42.6%) also believes that Reiner wanted to receive judgement, perhaps from Eren. Just a little under 26% believe that in addition to receiving judgement, Reiner also wants to receive forgiveness. Few believe Reiner solely wants forgiveness. Finally, a little under 15% simply aren’t sure what Reiner wants.

He just cant take it anymore, he wanna die. If he stays alive he will become the reason of death of more people which he doesnt want

He wants it to be over

He wants to be killed as an atonement because he can’t live with his contradictory feelings about what he’s done

He wants what happens after someone is judged- to be sentenced. Reiner already judged himself.

I dont care

WOULD YOU LIKE TO GET A HUG FROM PIECK? 54 Responses

An incredibly serious question with a lopsided result. Just under 69% would like to receive a hug from Pieck, in contrast to 13% who’d rather not. 18.5% don’t really care about stuff like this.

DO YOU THINK HELOS ACTUALLY EXISTED? 53 Responses

The majority (little under 53%) believe Helos was a complete fabrication, down to his very existence. Some others (18.9%) think he existed, but wasn’t anybody special or (13.2%) think he existed and was actually involved with ending the Great Titan War. A bit over 15% just don’t care.

“I’M THE SAME AS YOU.” EREN SAID THIS TO REINER A FEW TIMES IN THE EPISODE. HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THAT? DO YOU THINK EITHER OF THEM HARBOR A GRUDGE AGAINST THE OTHER? 29 Responses

One of the episode’s focuses was the meeting between Eren and Reiner, in addition to their general relationship. Here’s what a few people thought about the central motif of the meeting:

At this point Eren's attitude is all like "It's nothing personal."

Eren is in the same state of mind like reiner, he wanted to become the hero, yet he became a villan in the enemy's eyes

I think Eren's right. They're the same, and S1 and S4 parallel their actions in multiple ways. I honestly don't think Eren has any kind of grudge against Reiner anymore. I think he's moved on from his hatred and is just doing what he thinks he has to. And Reiner just seems ready to die so he doesn't have any kind of grudge either.

I think Eren is definitely holding a grudge, it’s not like him not too.

Hell no, Reiner is an irredeemable monster. Based on the preview for the next episode, whatever Eren does from here on out is justified.

If Eren kills someone dear to Reiner, maybe Reiner will hold a grudge against Eren, otherwise they understand each other reasons.

I think they recognise each other’s efforts to protect their homelands (even if it means destruction) and their determination to do so, and that they have the same motivations and values. i think they don’t have a grudge against each other because they are able to see they are similar people who have just been placed on opposing sides, and that it is nothing more than their duties to bring down the enemy, but at heart, they hold the same values and morals.

I think it mainly shows how Eren has matured over the last few years. He knows Reiner’s intentions now, and he can admit that the two of them are similar without lashing out at him immediately and labeling him as a completely evil man (like he used to). I think Eren might still have some harsh feelings towards Reiner, but it definitely doesn’t seem like it’s his priority right now. Reiner doesn’t clearly display that he has a huge grudge against Eren (though I bet he still isn’t very fond of Eren). More than anything, Reiner seems to be struggling with his thoughts about his time in Paradis. It seems like he can’t accept the fact that Paradis Eldians are not all devils; he may be struggling to suppress this new perspective, and he forces himself to commit to his “honorary Marleyan identity” instead. Thus, I don’t think Reiner hates Eren as much as he used to, as he seems to be showing slight signs of sympathy towards the Paradis Eldians.

No Eren is now a grown ass adult when je was making his decision. Reiner was a kid he was like 11? 12? He didn't know he was an indoctrinated child and he suffered all his life for that. Eren isn't at all the same as Reiner.

I feel like that emphasizes that the people of Marley and Eldia are no different from each other, just that they are on different sides. I do not think Eren and Reiner harbor a grudge against each other.

They’re both pretty fucking broken. I don’t think Eren or Reiner hate each other because Eren said “if it’s to save the world, then you didn’t have much of a choice.” But I also think part of Reiner wants Eren to hate him because he hates himself so much.

i think the old eren would hate him but it’s been 4 years and now i think he has realized that they are in fact very similar. i feel it is very interesting what happened but i think there would still be a minor grudge against each other

They both have the same purpose but different paths, to protect their loved ones from a threat. Since it's not really a personal issue but a bigger picture I don't think they resent each other, it's just a coincidence how they both ended up against each other.

DO YOU THINK THAT EREN AND REINER ARE EFFECTIVE FOILS TO EACH OTHER? 52 Responses

The vast majority (88.4%) seem to agree with the notion of Reiner being a foil to Eren, be it a complete or partial foil. 9.6% dissent and argue that there’s no comparison.

LADY KIYOMI OF THE AZUMABITO CLAN SEEMED TO NOT STICK AROUND FOR TYBUR’S THEATER PRODUCTION. WHY? 52 Responses

An interesting development came in Episode 5 in the form of Lady Kiyomi of the Azumabito leaving Tybur’s Play before it started. The majority (just under 52%) thought it meant that she had ties to Eren and/or the SC. A large minority (34.6%) on the other believe that although she somehow found out about the attack beforehand, she has no ties to Eren. Some others were either already spoiled, believe she got lucky or think she had her own plans of assaulting Tybur during the play.

MR. LEONHART SEEMED ADAMANT THAT ANNIE IS STILL ALIVE AND WILL COME BACK HOME. WHAT DO YOU THINK? 53 Responses

When it comes to Mr. Leonhart’s appearance and his convictions, the vast majority (83%) believe that Annie is alive. The major division comes about whether Annie will be able to reunite with her father or not. Some others believe that Annie is neither dead nor alive and is more permanently stuck in her crystalline state. Only one person believes she is simply dead and that’s that.

REINER IS SHOCKED BY EREN’S PRESENCE ON THE MAINLAND. WHAT’S THE FUNNIEST WAY YOU COULD ENVISION EREN GETTING ACROSS THE SEA? 52 Responses

A bit of a less serious question came out here. How could Eren get across the sea in a less serious manner? Some thought him walking on water would be rather amusing, others believed piggy-backing on Armin’s Colossal Titan would be most humorous. Other options included free-styling across the sea or kayaking.

A ship? Maybe one of those Marley sent to Paradis in the last four years?

bOAT

Had armin yeet him across

He rode on David Hasselhoff

Used one of the Marleyan ships that was sent to Paradis to go to Marley

WHO IS THAT LANKY SOLDIER WHO TRAPPED PIECK AND PORCO IN THE HOLE? 53 Responses

A plurality (45.3%) believes the lanky soldier who trapped Pieck and Porco is someone we already know. Though a little under 23% think that it’s actually a new character only Pieck knows. In a similar vein, 13.2% think that it’s a new character from the SC. 17% appear to have been spoiled, however.

MAGATH ASKS, “HAS IT BEGUN?” WHEN HE LEARNS THE WARRIORS HAVE GONE MISSING. WHAT “IT” IS MAGATH TALKING ABOUT? 51 Responses

Just shy of 50% think that Magath was already aware of Eren and/or SC’s presence in Marley when noting that “it” has already begun. Others believe that he either had some other plan created in conjunction with Willy or was waiting on an attack from the nation of Hizuru. A little under 20% just aren’t sure.

He was anticipating enemy attack

DO YOU THINK WILLY WAS TRUTHFUL WHEN REVEALING THE “TRUTH” TO THE WORLD? 51 Responses

When it comes to Willy revealing the “truth” to the world, the vast majority (72.5%) believe that Lord Tybur was largely truthful when it came to dropping bombshells, but also made sure to twist certain things to get a favorable narrative. Some others think that he was either completely or only partially truthful.

WILLY ACCUSES EREN OF WANTING TO UNLEASH THE COLOSSAL TITANS UPON THE WORLD. DO YOU THINK HE IS JUST DEMONIZING HIM TO GET THE WORLD TO ATTACK PARADIS, OR DO YOU THINK THIS IS SOMETHING EREN IS CAPABLE OF DOING? 51 Responses

A rather noted accusation from Willy rained down upon Eren in this episode. And as a result, we gained a rather colorful pie chart to boot. In it, a slight plurality (23.5%) seemed to believe Tybur’s accusation when it came to discerning Eren’s future plans. Slightly less (19.6%) thought that Tybur was making up BS about Yeagerboy. The same percentage (19.6%) took a middle group, arguing that although Tybur actually believes this is Eren’s plan, Eren actually wants something different. Some others simply note that Eren couldn’t do that dastardly act, even if he wanted to due to lack of royal blood. 21.6% were spoiled about the story’s future.

Pretty sure Eren wants to kill every last person outside of Paradis and is going to use Zeke’s royal blood to do so, but I think Zeke will be tricked or forced into it sonehow

ON A SCALE OF 1-5, HOW BADLY DO YOU FEEL FOR FALCO ABOUT THE WHOLE LETTER FIASCO? 52 Responses

When it comes to Falco and the whole letter fiasco, there is much sympathy for the boy. More than half gave a rating of either 4 or 5 and only 13.5% gave a rating of either 2 or 1. In conclusion, Eren is a mean poopy-head!

EREN TOLD FALCO LAST EPISODE THAT HE HOPED FALCO WOULD LIVE A LONG LIFE. YET HE TRANSFORMED ON TOP OF HIM IN THIS EPISODE. WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? 52 Responses

Staying on the topic of Falco, and Eren’s actions being contradictory to his words, almost 56% believe that although Eren was honest with his words in regards to Falco’s future, he had no qualms about letting that get in the way of his plans. A noted minority (28.8%) think that Eren hoped Reiner would protect the young boy. A small percentage also thought that Eren was simply lying to Falco.

DID YOU EXPECT EREN TO TRANSFORM ON TOP OF REINER AFTER HIS SPEECH ABOUT THEIR SIMILARITIES? 51 Responses

When it came to the episode’s ending, the majority seemed to expect Eren’s transformation, be it because of spoilers or own predictions (58.8%). A noted minority (41.2%) did not expect it, however, predicting either a recruitment attempt from Eren or something else entirely.

ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS ON THE EPISODE?

I loved the music. It made all so tense my heart was beating like crazy.

WILD AND AN EMOTIONAL ROLLARCOASTER

As an anime only, i think that the choice of ost in this episode was beyond good. I don't see why people are complaining about the ost. For me it was perfect because Eren's transformation was like a sudden turn and 2Volts is perfect for that just like when they reveal the owl as the Attack titan. Wayyy better that YSBG or any ost that these manga readers were hoping it to be. Mappa and the production crew doesn't deserve any of these hate. Done ranting fgs.

Grim Reminder 2.0, but with Marley and the Warriors finally getting what they deserve for what they've done? I'm DOWN for that!

I’m wondering whether Historia is still Queen and how much character development she had gone through as a monarch during war

The people who complain about the music choices of the directors are just pure titan idiots

Assuming he lives through this battle, I think Falco is going to be one of the main characters in season 4. He has been telling himself that he “does not want to fight anymore” and he was probably influenced by what Eren (Mr. Kruger) had said to him on the bench. I can see Falco maybe rebelling against Marley in the future, but for now he’s clearly still devoted to Marley. Overall, I loved this episode, and season 4 is finally picking up with the action. I was looking forward to seeing our protagonists (Eren and the Scouts) again, and I thought it was interesting how Eren seemed much more mature, yet still somewhat insane in this episode. I am very excited to see the next episode, particularly to see the rest of the Scouts and to see what happens in the “war” Eren starts. I am also curious to see if anyone from any other nations decide to side with the Eldians, or if all of them simply believe Willy and hate the Paradis Eldians too.

manga readers really need to shut up and put bigger spoiler warnings 😐 loved the episode despite getting spoiled.

It was one of the best episodes of AOT I have seen, I truly don’t understand why or how people could complain about it. I’ve seen the posts about the soundtrack not fitting the episode but I honestly do not agree. The whole episode was perfectly directed and had me on the edge of my seat the whole time.

Ost's totally fine, so is the CG. I think most are too invested in the episode to give a fuck except Manga readers.

I wish the Paradisians would have found another way to achieve their objectives instead of killing innocent civilians, like maybe targeted attacks on key military targets, or demonstrations of strength or public information campaigns to dissuade Marleyans and other people from wanting to go to war against them.

WHERE DO YOU PRIMARILY DISCUSS THE SERIES? 48 Responses

Thanks again to everyone who participated! We’ll see you again next episode!

#snk poll #snk polls #shingeki no kyojin #attack on titan #snk #aot #snk spoilers #snk s4

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