#says sam spoils her and they need to fix things

[starstaiined]

as a kid, tara had a really long stetch of being non-verbal. the only thing she would say was sam? in different intonations

[collegetennisoriginstory]

Hello, I come bearing Bug Reports!

-After sleeping on the air mattress the first night Sam was over, and then taking the option to platonically share the bed on the second night, the next page is always D leaving the room seemingly out of nowhere with the three romance exclusive intimate scene options, even when I've never flirted with Sam or have told them I have feelings for someone else

-I'm not sure if this is a bug or not, but despite only passing on one or two study opportunities ever, progressing well with the SOC project, and being on good terms with the prof, the game acts like MC is far behind on her studies while Sam is visiting

-On a similar note, when choosing to study after Sam leaves, the game seems to think we went to the library to study the morning before no matter if we did or not

-Last one's a little vague because I don't want to spoil anyone on how to do this if the asks gets posted, but! AFAIK I've done all the steps for Tobin and I to be considered as 'together' when Sam visits, but the option to say as much is still grayed out - I can only pick the prompts that G and Rayyan also have versions of.

Love love LOVED the update overall!!

2nd and 3rd are fixed, big thank you for your detailed statements!

1st one I might need a bit more help on—where did the game state that MC is behind on studies? Is it on Sunday after Sam leaves, and it's stated that MC's a little behind on their readings for the weekend? I think that's more a short-term thing, like—they haven't done enough readings for this particular week because Sam came, but I can try to word that better. Otherwise, let me know if you're referring to a different part that states MC's behind on their classwork!

[firstelevens]

bed sharing for the ask game?

🛏️ Bed Sharing

After the week they’ve had, Bucky is tired enough that he doesn’t think to ask why Shuri looks so smug at dinner. He’s mostly just caught between relief that their mission is over and worry for Sam, who spends the whole meal looking like he’s about to pass out facedown in his stew.

It’s only afterwards, when a member of palace staff escorts them to their guest quarters, that Bucky realizes he messed up. Sam is half asleep, listing into Bucky’s side at this point, so it’s in hushed tones and reasonably competent Xhosa that Bucky says he’ll just get the Captain situated before Bucky gets shown to his own room.

The blank and somewhat panicked stare that he gets in response is all that Bucky needs to realize what happened. He backtracks immediately, assures the now-worried attendant that he just misunderstood, and hauls Sam into the room before the conversation can deteriorate any further.

Sam is just awake enough to stumble off to the bathroom, grabbing sweatpants from his duffel as he goes. Left alone in the room, Bucky surveys the space.

The view out the windows is beautiful, the room is tastefully decorated, and—to absolutely no one’s surprise—there’s just one bed.

Part of Bucky is delighted that things between him and Shuri have been repaired enough for her to play silly pranks on him again, but did it have to be now? And did she have to drag Sam into it?

They’re due to stay at least another three days in Wakanda, long enough for Torres and Yelena to heal up fully. If Bucky reacts now, Shuri’s just going to escalate things, and he’s not sure he’s ready to see what leveling up looks like here.

Bucky considers his escape routes. He’s been in the guest quarters at the palace enough times over the years to know that all the rooms are similarly appointed, and there’s always a plenty-comfortable chaise by the coffee table, arranged to face the windows that look out onto the city. When he turns to that particular spot in this room, it’s conspicuously empty.

There might be a couch in Yelena or Joaquín’s rooms, he reasons, but if either of them wake up to find him sleeping there, he’ll never hear the end of the questions about lover’s quarrels, and they’re both too injured for him to put any real menace into a threat. He could take the floor, maybe, but if he does, Sam’s either gonna fix him with those big brown pity eyes or he’ll mention it to Shuri in passing, and either way, Bucky’s going to suffer.

He spends long enough quietly panicking over his options that Sam comes back out of the bathroom. He stifles a yawn, his faded St. Bernard Bullfrogs t-shirt clinging on for dear life as he stretches his arms over his head.

It takes him a second to take in the room, but he seems unfazed when he does. “We sharing?” he asks Bucky, yawning again.

“It’s just a mix-up,” Bucky says quickly. “I can—”

“We’re sharing,” says Sam, with an absentminded pat to Bucky’s shoulder. “Don’t worry, I won’t get fresh with you. I’m a gentleman.”

Bucky’s face goes hot. He’d been doing just fine panicking about sharing a bed with Sam in the abstract; the last thing that he needs to think of is what it might look like if Sam did get fresh with him. He swallows hard and shakes his head to clear it.

Sam, for his part, is completely oblivious to the crisis that Bucky’s experiencing. He just ambles towards the bed and throws back the covers on the right side. The sigh that he lets out as he settles on the mattress is pure relief, accompanied by a softly mumbled, “I love Wakanda.”

It’s deeply inconvenient, Bucky has to admit, that Sam is so cute. It would be fine if he were just hot. Hot would be fine. Hot can be ignored. Cute, on the other hand…cute isn’t something Bucky has defenses against. Cute is why Bucky always caves and takes the boys out for ice cream before dinner and why the baby goats in Bucky’s charge always got away with misbehaving. Cute is why Alpine is the most spoiled cat in the five boroughs and why all three Barnes sisters always knew that the quickest way to get something was to ask Bucky for it first.

Cute is why—after a furiously-whispered pep talk in the mirror about finding an attendant and asking to be shown to his own room—when Bucky emerges from the bathroom to see a bleary-eyed Sam sit up and pat the left side of the bed, his feet take him there without any conscious signal from his brain.

(Cute is why, when Bucky wakes up the next morning to Sam clinging to him like an octopus, he just kisses his forehead, turns off the alarm, and pulls him closer.)

[goldenbloodytears]

I would really like to know more about Sam, without spoiling the plot of future projects what can you say about her and Danny in the asks 2, 3, 9, 10, 14 and 15?

Also if Sam was a character of the scream franchise which one would she be?

Send by Mx. 👍

2. How do they treat themselves when they're feeling sad?

Sam's go to is to put on Elton John (most likely Honky Chateau—I can probably write a small piece on how Rocket Man can be seen as a metaphor for gay alienation) and then probably get a big tub of ice cream going. She’s not a stranger to depressive spirals, but sad and depressed are not quite the same thing—she deals with sad a lot better than depressed I would say.

With Danny… I think he tends to bypass sad and go straight to irritated. I’m a big believer in old man Johnson toxic masculinity indoctrination, so Danny probably lowkey thinks crying is for weaklings (and women). I think he might result to trying to calm himself with a couple drinks if for some reason he can’t immediately fix the problem that is causing him to be sad/irritated… however, said combo is more likely to lower his inhibition… and that’s when you’re probably more likely to get an impromptu murder (in comparison to his more planned stories).

3. What parts of themselves do they tend to hide?

Sam tends to hide her sexuality. Or at least attempt to. She lives in a small town, and the gossip mill would surely have a field day with the local English lady reporter turning out to be a “lesbian” (because bisexuals don’t exist in 1994 /sarcasm). The result is where she’s inoffensive enough to not cause outright homophobic drama, but she’s not exactly living the best life she could be either… especially when she’s partly trying to play nice for a family that aren’t nearly as accepting as they could be.

Danny hides himself. To be clearer, I’ve been considering whether his usage of personas happen to allow him to connect with an element of himself that has long been suppressed by his old man’s teachings. This is kind of a half-baked thought that I need to think about more. It’s a bit like being a method actor, an inherent element of performance. Think about how many seemingly outgoing and over confident performers are actually rather introverted (and not just because of paparazzi hounds)… also consider how people tend to act more freely when anonymous, for good or ill. Danny hides a lot of himself, he hides his literal self as Danny, but also other elements. His sexuality just like Sam, since being a bisexual man in the 90s is just… asking for trouble. However, he’s so strongly manifested in his expected gender roles as a masculine military brat that you wouldn’t even guess he might be queer unless you went for some crazy extreme like the fact he tends to dress well on average. I don’t think his personas suddenly act flaming (just to be clear) but he’s a little bit nicer, way more talkative, a little bit goofier/nerdier and I don’t think it’s entirely an act (although he believes it is and will tell you so).

9. What are their insecurities?

Sam is insecure about many things at the start of the story. This isn’t really a plot spoiler. She’s insecure about the fact both her brothers are married with kids, she’s insecure about the fact she’s queer, she’s insecure about her relationship with her girlfriend. She’s insecure about her future in the province she was born in—quick history lesson, in 1994 Quebec proposed a provincial referendum to decide whether the citizens of Quebec largely supported the idea of Quebec becoming its own sovereign country to be voted on in 1995. There was a major divide along language lines with English speaking Quebecers largely supporting the federalist Canadian position (No) while the French-speaking Québécois generally supported the sovreignist Yes side. There was a large exodus of English speaking Quebecers from the province around this time, settling in Ontario and Alberta primarily. You had small towns with flourishing English populations suddenly lose multiple families which had lived there for generations only for the towns to become much more French. This is the situation Sam finds herself facing, working as a local English newspaper which is now struggling as a result of less readership… so honestly she’s even kinda insecure about the future of her job too, period, lol.

I think Danny’s insecurities would require a whole post of their own, however, I’ve briefly touched on one of them in question 15.

10. What are their emotional triggers?

For Sam: curiosity, fear, frustration.

For Danny: boredom, frustration, praise.

I’m not entirely sure what this question is asking so I’ve kinda listed the emotions that I think are most likely to motivate them to do something for good or worse.

14. What kind of people do they tend to gravitate towards?

Sam tends to gravitate towards people with big personalities. She’s a much more subdued person and kinda lives vicariously through them. She’s intrigued by the promise of life outside small town Quebec, so it’s very easy to get her attention with stories of travel. She has a major obsession with this random cold case that happened when she was a teenager, to the point that everyone thinks she’s a little bit weird for it, and in this way she’s also drawn to people that will put up with this particular quirk. I think you can already see where I’m going with this.

Danny, like a true confidence trickster, is drawn to people most likely to believe his bullshit. This doesn’t mean he looks for idiots, he’s still a bit of a wannabe academic blowhard in spirit and as such I think he’s still drawn to people who profess at least a bit of a braincell…. But it’s the trust element. He’s looking for people who want to believe what he says. He’s also looking for people who think he’s cool. Even if he’s Jed or persona #632.

So when taking these tendencies together, you can already kind of start to see how Danny and Sam compliment each other in terms of the people they are seeking. They’re both looking for somebody who’s going to gas them up—feed their egos and hope for the future.

15. What do they like/dislike about themselves?

Sam likes her skills as a journalist, she feels like her stubbornness is a useful trait. She wishes she was better at being more traditionally feminine. She dislikes her height, at 5’10” she towers over a lot of guys and it’s worse if she wears heels.

I feel like we all have a rough idea of what Danny ���likes” about himself, so I’ll focus on what he dislikes. His emotionality. He knows he can be impulsive, and he thinks feelings like fear, anger, and sadness are not particularly useful for himself when he’s supposed to be this killer who goes around murdering in the night. If he could be a mindless killer, I’m sure he would do so.

Bonus: What character in Scream would Sam be?

Hmmm, that’s a very good question. I think I would need to do a complete series rewatch to really pin it down but I think she would kinda be a weird proxy if you were to mix Gail and Dewey together (she’s their forbidden baby). She has a lot of Gail’s tenacious journalism qualities but she’s a lot nicer, similar to Dewey. Her brother Chris is also a cop, so she’s a little bit functional to Tatum in a way.

[azucar-skull]

I am foaming at the mouth I need to rant about something in Feral Casey AU.

Okay so Usagi and Hana.

Usagi and Hana are the Henry and Sam of FCAU. Quite literally if you have seen TLOU HBO series. This wasn't my intention though.

I know I wanted one of the main cast to be deaf, a challenge to better myself in representation. And originally, I chose Usagi.

It was gonna be so cute. Usagi getting caught in an explosion to save Hana and then the two end up needing to rely on each other. Usagi needed her ears, and Hana needed his protection and guidance.

Then Leo and Usagi would be the ultimate disabled couple with Leo being an amputee. And they would be so fucking cute together and AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA--

But there was a problem.

Hana didn't have a personality.

At the time, her only personality trait was that she was dependent on Usagi and then ultimately became a rude character that I didn't want her to be. I tried to twist it as her overcoming ableism but nothing worked out.

After much debate, I made Hana the deaf character to fix her personality.

I'm not saying being deaf is a personality trait. But Hana being deaf brought out a better personality within her.

Now I have a little girl who becomes deaf in the crossfire of an explosion and her personality takes a turn. She is scared, she is lost, and she needs Usagi to be her shield. Once they finally find the Resistance and Casey Jr taught her sign language, she became more independent.

Because she had hearing beforehand, she knows of a life where sound meant something to her. And she wants it back more than anything. She gets cochlear implants and wears them all the time. Usagi is happy for her.

But then things come up. Noises became too much, she starts getting headaches, the implants become uncomfortable since she wears them ALL DAY.

She refuses to put them on one day and this is Usagi and Hana’s first fight of many.

Now, don't get me wrong, Usagi wants to be a good brother. Truly. But he doesn't understand Hana’s situation. He just assumes at first.

In this fight, Usagi and Hana go back and forth about needing the implants until Hana manages to sign why she hates them. Usagi negotiates a compromise, asking her to wear them when they are outside. The outside contains Kraang and gunfire and other things that you need to listen out for. Hana agrees.

But then things get worse.

Her hearing becomes more and more damaged and the implants needed to get upgraded again and again. She still finds them uncomfortable to wear, still gets headaches when she wears them, voices become harder to understand, and implants are very hard to come by in the apocalypse.

So one day, when she and the others are meant to be going out, she refused to wear them. Usagi and Hana fight again.

Usagi wants to keep her safe, you know? He means well. But Hana was just not having it. Her anger bubbles over as she aggressively signs her thoughts until her hands stopped making sense.

And then all she could do was scream.

Then she broke down crying.

The siblings never fought again after that. Usagi finally breaks out of his audism mindset and learns to support Hana’s choices no matter what.

We get to watch a character go from a scared, shy, dependant child turn into a stubborn-headed, strong, independent girl through the journey of accepting Deafness. This is a journey I have been building since the idea for FCAU started and I am grateful to have the support of my ASL professor (who is Deaf) who caught me drawing sketches of Hana and became invested in helping me.

And there is a reason why Usagi is so keen on his ways but I don't wanna spoil it yet. TLDR, it has to do with depression and shit. It's a whole thing that we'll get into later.

BUT THAT'S NOT ALL.

Without spoiling too much, there's going to be a particular episode about 1/4 way through the story involving Usagi and Hana’s relationship and uhh let's just say it'll make you cry.

Usagi proves himself as the loving brother that will do anything for his sister and puts her above all else.

As Hana faces a great fear that she is no longer afraid off because she knows she can handle it and knows who got her back.

Okay rant over, I am satisfied. I'm going to bed.

[zooophagous]

The fatal flaw of a shared living arrangement is there's really no "getting away" while you're in it. The institute was large enough that Strauss could exist more than a city block away from Director Van Helsing- as he had gone back to using formal titles- and still occupy the same building. Despite that, their routines had considerable overlap.

Giving her space to sort her feelings wasn't easy when he could not, under pain of death or capture, actually leave her space. He made his way down the hall to Ursula's office and quietly rapped on the door.

"Come in."

"Guten abend. I have a request."

"Hello Mr. Strauss. If your request involves a library book you will have to wait until I can fetch whatever you're looking for. You're still banned from there."

"It is not that. I was wondering what I would have to do, to gain leave from the institute for an evening."

"Why are you asking me? You've already had several field trips with Artie. Ask her."

"You misunderstand. I am asking for leave to go out without the director. Alone."

"Alone?" Ursula peered at him from over her glasses. Her exaggerated raised eyebrows already showed him the answer.

"You know you aren't allowed out alone."

He fought a frown that tugged at the corners of his mouth.

"Troy is allowed out alone to visit his partner."

"Troy didn't break out, spend several days on the run in the street, maul someone and rob a pet store, Strauss. Artemis may have forgiven you for that indescretion, but I'm not about to forget it. I don't know exactly how you can make that one up to me but you haven't done so. That answer is final."

He let out a heavy sigh. No point arguing with her.

A heavy hand clapped him on the shoulder.

"Hey bud. I was just about to hit the town with Sam for a bit. You wanna come?"

Troy smiled at him and then turned to Ursula. "That ok, boss?"

"If it is alright with both you and Sam, I suppose I don't care." Ursula huffed. "Both of you are going to be wearing the GPS while you're out, though. Beyond that, be home by sunrise."

"For sure, wouldn't want to bring home any deep fried vampires, eh? What say you Strauss?"

Strauss paused. He was caught off guard, but he knew this game.

"If you are quite sure I will not be spoiling your evening, I would be glad to stretch my wings a bit."

"You? Ruin an evening? Surely you jest." Troy was all smiles as he led Strauss away from Ursula's office with his hand on the vampire's back.

"Sorry to butt in like that bud, but you sounded like you needed a hand. Hope it's ok I had to come with. I won't step on your toes on purpose while we're out."

"No, it is fine. I am more worried I am stepping on yours. I was under the impression that Sam hated me."

"He's not 100% ready to make friends but I wouldn't go that far. Just be polite for the ride, once we get to the bar you can mosey off for a bit. Anything specific you want to do?"

"No, not really. I just... need some space that I cannot get here."

"I take it the talk you had with Artemis the other day didn't go so hot? You've been acting like a sad lump ever since."

"That is just the thing, I do not know how it went." He huffed, and knit his brow in frustration as they made their way to the car loading bay.

"At first it went well, then I thought it went very well, and then it fell apart without either of us even saying a word. I wonder if I hurt her feelings, or worse, harmed her in some way. But you know that manners of socializing are all puzzles to me. I cannot tell which of us, or even if either of us, is at fault."

"Sounds complicated."

"Very."

"Well, I can't fix that, but I can get you drunk. Will that help?"

"May as well. It isn't as if it's about to get any worse."

"Drunk it is then."

Troy Nabbed a set of keys and led the way to an old, beat up SUV. The notion that Troy could drive planted a tiny seed of jealousy in Strauss. He never did learn to drive. One had to be allowed outside to drive.

It was late enough in the evening now, in the dark and cold of winter, that Strauss didn't bother wearing a hood or a hat. In fact, he'd sort of forgotten to grab winter gear at all just to keep up the illusion of normalcy. Oh well. Sam was the only one who'd be around to ask questions, and he was sure he could find a way to wave him off.

The car at last pulled up to Sam's apartment. Sam himself wandered down the steps and stopped when he looked into the vehicle and saw two faces looking back out. He approached the car slowly. Strauss, despite his height, began to feel very small, and all but shrank in his seat.

"Hey Sam." Troy said with a smile as his partner climbed in and shut the door.

"Hope it's ok if we give my buddy Luther a ride into town? He doesn't have to be part of the date or anything he just can't drive."

"Guten abend, Sam." Strauss greeted him meekly. He didn't know Sam's last name (Sam declined to share any details with him) so his usual tactic of formal titles wasn't available to him. he felt very strange.

"Hey." Sam replied curtly. "I guess it's fine if he can keep his hands to himself. Is he even allowed out without supervision like this? They know he's here right?"

Sam talked as if Strauss wasn't there, talking about him and not to him. It only made him feel smaller.

"It's fine, security signed off on it. He's... medicated. Technically I'm his chaperone but I'm not following him around all night. He's just gonna have a few drinks. He's had a shit couple days, I wanted to make him feel better."

Troy spoke with an insistence in his voice that he hoped drove home how much he understood that this was awkward, but it had to happen anyway. Sam seemed to understand, though he rolled his eyes.

"Fine, it's fine. I can make nice for a little bit. I guess if anyone is going to make sure he goes out and doesn't kill anyone it may as well be someone who can handle him."

It was Strauss' turn to roll his eyes. Sam very much could not handle him, he'd already proven that much, not even when the vampire was on the brink of fainting. He'd let Sam have his bravado, though, if it kept the peace.

"I promise you I am as docile and quiet as a little church mouse. I just need to get drunk and forget my woes."

"What woes might that be?"

"Eh... I rather would not say. Suffice to say it involves a woman."

"Girl trouble? You?" Sam asked with a slight mocking tone. "I didn't think they'd let you have a girlfriend in the loony bin."

"They let Troy have you."

"Troy doesn't bite."

"No?" Strauss said with a sly grin. Troy blushed deeply and cleared his throat.

"Oh look! the bar! We don't have to keep talking about this anymore." He pulled the rusty SUV into an only slightly crooked parallel parking spot and the trio were free. Strauss was already regretting his decision. He didn't really like this bar, and the sensory overload was almost worse than being alone with his thoughts.

"I am going to walk around the block a bit before I join you."

"Oh no you ain't." Sam shook his head. "I know what you're capable of, if we're out together you're staying where I can see you."

Strauss frowned. He would begrudgingly tolerate Troy playing chaperone to him, but Sam was a much harder pill to swallow.

"I am capable of minding my own business for a few minutes."

"This says you ain't." Sam raised his arm and showed off the jagged pink line of a bite scar. Strauss set his jaw in sullen silence.

"Stop fighting for like five minutes? Please?" Troy whined and held open the door. He leaned in conspiratorially to Strauss as he entered.

"Look, wait till he has a drink or two in him then just excuse yourself to the restroom and go out, ok? Just play it cool. I know you're cool but he doesn't."

"I get it." Strauss handwaved Troy's concern away.

"Let me at least get you one drink. How about a bloody mary? eh? cuz you're a vampire? get it?"

"No."

"Dirty Shirley it is then."

The inside of the bar was loud and close. It was almost loud enough to make him forget his problems, mostly by giving him newer, more annoying problems to focus on. Troy immediately set to work fetching some social lubricant by fetching the group drinks. The cocktail for Strauss, and a pitcher of beer for him and Sam.

"Danke." Strauss sipped his drink with a stifled grimace. It was syrupy sweet, unpleasant, but the alcohol in it promised a pleasant dulling of the senses. He finished it quickly. The jukebox was playing a song he recognized as coming from a band called 'Kiss,' a band he had encountered while perusing classic rock, and one he'd decided he hated. The outing was not bringing him the peace he'd hoped for.

Troy ordered food from the bartender, who looked a bit concerned to see Strauss.

"Is he cool to be out of the hospital right now?"

"Wouldn't be here if he wasn't cool. Can you guys relax?"

Troy had his back, but Strauss knew when he wasn't wanted. Worse, his impeccable sense of hearing meant he heard every remark, no matter how quiet they thought they were being. There was, however, an out.

"I have to use the restroom, excuse me."

He pushed himself away from the bar and found himself to the dark hallway leading to both the bathroom and the kitchen. The bathroom was on his left, so he swung right, into the racket of the back room, and kept walking towards the illuminated green "EXIT" sign.

"Woah hey man you can't be back here-"

It died in his ears as he walked straight past them and into the alley behind the building. The heavy steel door swung shut and locked behind him, and he was, for a moment, free. He breathed deeply and rested his back against the spraypaint-covered wall and took in the street art.

The alley was dark and quiet and mercifully empty, though it stank of old grease. He stuck his hands into his pockets and straightened up.

"You may as well come out. There will be no better time than now."

WHUMP.

A heavy black shadow fell to the ground from the roof of the bar. Sylvain stepped into the ring of dingy light being cast from the single porch light by the bar's back door.

"Aw, I was trying to sneak up on you."

"You are not very quiet." Strauss replied with a cold sneer. "I had figured I would be able to find you in town, and I was right. What you're doing is very foolish, you know. If I can track you this easily I imagine it would be quick work for Frau Harker."

"You didn't track me. I'm the one tracking you, remember?" She smiled, showing off a sharkish row of sharp teeth.

"You seem eager to see me again, though, so I take it my little reading assignment must have gotten through to you. Did you find it illuminating?"

"Mostly I found it very sad. Was this all some sort of attempt to gain my sympathy?"

"More of an attempt to warn you."

"Warn me of what?"

"Oh come on, you can't be that dense. You already know they're lying to you, and you've already seen that they'll turn on one of their own in an instant. As soon as you outlive your usefulness they'll discard you the only way they know how."

"Is that so?" He bared his fangs at her. "Because the way I heard it, you were given more grace than you deserved even after you cut out Director Van Helsing's eye."

"Oh, she told you that little story, did she?" Sylvain mocked, and paced around him in a wide circle. Much about her was shark like, and the predatory circling only completed the illusion. As did her eyes, which were now dilated to the point of empty blackness.

"So you did rat me out to the boss lady?"

"No. Nobody knows you're here. Not because of me, anyway. I can't speak to the consequences of your own carelessness."

"Now isn't that sweet! You really kept your mouth shut this entire time? I figured you'd have blown my cover in the first fifteen minutes."

"I didn't want anyone to chase you. I was worried they would get hurt."

"I knew you weren't all dumb. You're right, they would have. Of course, now they have the opposite problem of not being at all prepared to meet me again. Don't worry so much for their safety, Strauss. You can't buy it. Not from me."

"If I cannot purchase safety I will take it."

"Try it. See how far you get. You're built like a rake. Didn't you read the medical textbook? You're sick, Strauss. You're actually probably dying. Fighting you would be like fighting a small dog."

She took a threatening step towards him. He squared his shoulders and drew himself up to his full height. He was bigger than her, for certain, older too- which usually gave an immortal being like a vampire the advantage. Her words of warning weren't lies however- he was sick. Emaciated. Sylvain had no qualms about feeding herself. If she came at him it would be over fast and not in his favor.

"Hey!"

Strauss turned his head. Sylvain's gaze followed his to see Sam coming down the alley. Strauss' hands began to tremble involuntarily.

"There you are! Did you think you could just wander off through the kitchen and nobody would tell me? Ma'am? Is this guy bothering you?"

Sylvain stared at Sam with a wide, entertained smile. "Who is this? You know him?"

"Frau Pietra, don't."

"Ma'am I'm sorry this guy isn't supposed to be away from his helper."

"Is he usually this stupid? Doesn't he know what I am? Can't he see?"

"Frau Pietra, leave him out of this, he has nothing to do with this."

"Are you coming inside or not? What the Hell are you guys doing out here?"

"Shut up." Sylvain snarled the order at Sam, who very suddenly did as he was told mid-sentence and stood standing struck silent and wide eyed.

"What are you doing to him?!"

"You know, Strauss, when a vampire loses their inhibitions, they can take control of more than just horses."

"Let him go."

"No."

"Let him go or I will force you."

"Ha!" She let out a loud, mocking laugh. "Watch this. Hey buddy." She turned to Sam with a bright smile. She waved her hand casually towards the street at the end of the alley.

"Kill yourself."

Sam took off at a dead run down the alley. Strauss bolted after him. Sylvain's hollow laughter echoed off the brick walls and died behind him. The alley was icy. He slipped once, scrambled to his feet and kept sprinting after Sam.

There were cars coming. He could hear them. The light of their headlights glinted off the ice that covered the city. Sam cleared the curb and ran into the road. Strauss jumped after him and shoved him bodily across the street and into a snowbank. He was momentarily bathed in a halo of light.

Then the vehicle struck him.

Strauss went up and over the hood of the SUV and tumbled onto the roof before finally falling into a broken heap on the road.

There were a lot of things a vampire was immune to. Through the years, Strauss had survived poisons, bullet wounds, extreme cold, toxic gases and even a couple of deadly plagues and come out nearly completely unscathed. He was not, however, wholly resilient to a concussion.

The world came through in waves. There was a lot of arguing going on, some crying too. He couldn't parse from who. Troy was there, insisting he be brought back to the Institute. "The Hospital," Troy called it. Strauss tried to raise his hand, to wave off their concerns.

"I am fine. Do not worry about me." He said. But it didn't quite come out. His mouth had somehow come disconnected from his brain. So had his hand, which lay limp on the ground. How annoying.

Troy was hovering over him, telling him to... do something? To play it cool? Play what cool? He understood the word "ambulance." He did not want to ride the ambulance. It didn't look like he'd have much of a choice.

Time felt too long and too short all at once. He was... levitating? No. Lifted into the back of an ambulance. Oh, a human ambulance. That probably wasn't good. They would ask questions. His insistence that he was ok oozed out of his mouth in a series of dull slurs. He wasn't putting on a very good "did not just get hit by a car" impression. Best to sleep it off.

So he did. He retreated deep into his dreaming. The body would heal with rest. Whatever happened now was beyond his control, and beyond his care.

[themculibrary]

Fics With Titles That Start With Y Masterlist

Yellow Journalists & Rose Gold Hearts (ao3) - heyjupiter bruce/tony G, 3k

Summary: When the Daily Bugle slanders Spider-Man, Peter Parker's loved ones show support in their own ways.

Years in the making (ao3) - glittercake sam/bucky G, 7k

Summary: Bucky and Sam meet as two young soldiers, but the time is never quite right to make it anything more. Until it eventually is.

or

Sam refuses to let himself fall in love while he's deployed. Bucky pines endlessly for years about the prettiest bird he’s ever seen. Sam’s no better.

Ye merry gentlemen (ao3) - Just_Bill bucky/steve/tony T, 7k

Summary: Because the cold of New York City winter is triggering to both Steve and Bucky, they spend the cold months in the tropics. Lots of fluff ensues. Lots. Bring a toothbrush.

Yoda One For Me (ao3) - Sunshineshipper mj/peter G, 5k

Summary: There wasn't a chance in hell that she was going to give Peter a romantic and nerdy card and also sign it. That was never going to happen. Which means Peter and Ned spent the entire lunch period conversing about his new secret admirer.

you always stand up (ao3) - oldrival pepper/tony G, 4k

Summary: endgame fix-it !! with a happy ending for everyone

You bring me closer to God (ao3) - Late_to_party_81 bucky/joaquin E, 8k

Summary: Bucky’s pissed off, his blood boiling, but all he can think about is taking out his frustrations on a certain, newly-minted Falcon.

you came back as the underdog (ao3) - buries bucky/wanda E, 119k

Summary: After the events of Westview, Wanda’s content to isolate herself away from the rest of the world in Sokovia. Unfortunately for her, Bucky has other plans.

You'd Be So Nice To Come Home To (ao3) - EmilianaDarling steve/bucky E, 26k

Summary: “What about you, Barnes?” asks Dugan. The sound of his voice brings Bucky back to the present, dredges him out of memories of a beat-up little apartment with sunlight streaming in through the windows. “Got yourself a girl waiting for you back home?”

There’s an answer on the tip of his tongue, one that he’ll deliver with a cocky grin and a half-laugh and a little shake of his head. But Bucky is exhausted and hungry and so sore it hurts to move, and one of the guys in their platoon fucking died yesterday. His mouth tastes like iodine water and his feet hurt and none of it’s going to get better any time soon, and all at once Bucky misses Steve so badly he can barely see straight.

“Yeah,” Bucky declares abruptly, the word escaping from his mouth before he fully realizes what he’s saying. “Yeah, I do.”

you might be what i want, but you’re not what i need (ao3) - krystalpomme T, 30k

Summary: tony invites peter to meet pepper’s family in california. peter is ecstatic at the thought of having a set of grandparents, but they aren’t too keen on having a grandchild that isn’t biologically theirs. morgan is spoiled, peter gets left out, and tony is caught in the middle of trying to prove himself to his in-laws or standing up for his son.

With newfound reluctance, he took Tony’s hand, preparing himself to be ignored for the rest of the trip.

That is—until Pepper’s mom turned around, looking Peter up and down before giving him a obviously fake smile,

“I’m sorry, who are you?”

young and full of running (ao3) - sharoncarters T, 5k

Summary: In which Sharon Carter and Bobbi Morse graduate from SHIELD Academy, search for the greatest burger in the country, learn how (not) to gamble, and live the American dream, among other things.

your braids like a pattern (love you to the moon & to saturn) (ao3) - archers_and_spies clint/natasha T, 17k

Summary: Natasha Romanoff meets Clint Barton in a salon in Iowa. He teaches her what trust means and she keeps coming back.

You're a Different Kind of Danger in the Daylight (ao3) - Siria bruce/natasha T, 7k

Summary: Poor little spider.

You’re Tuggin On Me (ao3) - MarvelsAssbutts sam/bucky M, 6k

Summary: Bucky manages to hide his feelings for Sam pretty well. Has been doing it for months with little to no problem or fantasy. Then Sam puts his hands in Bucky’s hair.

Your Faith Around My Neck (ao3) - Jo (jmathieson) clint/phil E, 72k

Summary: The collaring of Clint Barton.

Your Highness (ao3) - the_irish_mayhem jane/thor E, 6k

Summary: Jane wants something in bed and Thor is more than happy to oblige.

For the first day of Fosterson Week, post-TDW.

Your Latest Trick (ao3) - ChortlesOfDoom loki/tony, pepper/tony E, 273k

Summary: Following a violent, masterfully feigned death aboard the Statesman, Thor believes Loki's gone for good; more importantly, so does Thanos. Exhausted and hungry for revenge, Loki returns to Earth, but as he bides his strength, anonymously supplying the Avengers with inside knowledge between his own preparations, he begins to see the true cost of holding on.

your light guides me home (to you) (ao3) - bisexualbarry steve/tony M, 15k

Summary: Steve struggled with living for a long time. Even after escaping the New York Quarantine Zone, he doesn’t really know how to live.

Until he met Tony.

you should know me better than that (ao3) - napricot sam/bucky E, 32k

Summary: Sam and Bucky may be partners now, but they still have a lot of getting to know each other to do. For Sam, letting Bucky get to know him is proving to be a more difficult prospect than expected. At least, it is until an exposure to truth serum leads to some revelations about his and Bucky's relationship.

You've got a friend in me (ao3) - boleyn13 loki/tony, clint/natasha, pepper/tony M, 412k

Summary: After faking his death in the Dark World Loki is free to do what he wants. Instead of leaving everything behind Loki is driven by his thirst for revenge and won't find peace before he destroyed every single one of the Avengers. This time though he won't use violence, but the weapons of the God of Mischief: trickery, deceit and illusion. Loki decides to befriend the Avengers. However they won't know it's him. Not until he is close enough to strike. Unfortunately Loki didn't consider the possibility that he might get too close.

you were an army officer, and i just a rockette (ao3) - bisamwilson sam/bucky E, 11k

Summary: Bucky buys a USO uniform, and Sam learns there are merits to being late.

10/31/21: Sam gets a turn with the uniform.

10/30/22: Sam comes home to another surprise.

[sarah-dipitous]

Hellsite Nostalgia Tour 2023 Day 294

Devil’s Bargain/Twice Upon a Time

“Devil’s Bargain”

Plot Description: Dean, Sam, and a newly freed Castiel pursue a weakened Lucifer who’s travels lead him to a faith healer who is not what she seems

Would I Survive the First Five Minutes??: I mean, CAs barely looked alive at the beginning…oh, Lucifer’s going to steal some of that Cupid’s grace for sure

Lucifer, you didn’t need to punch a hole right through him

Aw, poor Lucifer is still experiencing human symptoms like hunger

Ketch, you are so fucked. Yeah, just go kill the devil before he fills back up on grace

Uh oh. I’m very curious about who this faith healer actually is but now I’m scared for her

No, Cas, don’t push your feelings about having been captured and Dean not knowing Azmodeus wasn’t actually you down for the sake of the mission

I mean, Sister Jo is an actual angel but WHO is she? Ok, not one we’ve seen before

She’s right. She’s not a very good angel, but she’s pretty good at negotiating business

If I never had to see that smug English bitchass again….

Thank you, Castiel, for saying what everyone was thinking:Ketch CANT just want to strike a blow for the good of humanity

This angel is so hot for Lucifer, good lord. Especially when she’s almost let him fully deplete her grace and she feels almost human (my phone tried to autofill allo … I mean, that too)

I’m convinced they made Donatello need a whole bunch of fried chicken to do his thing just so they could make evil Colonel Sanders Azmodeus be disgusted with it

Oh fuck. She’s a terrible angel, but I guess if you spent eternity just pressing a button each time a soul entered heaven and no one listened to your ideas on how to fix heaven, but then the universe’s bad boy angel took a liking to you and listened to you, yeah, you’d betray the Winchesters, too. Who are they to you?

(I’m being so brave trying not to cough, thus spooking Megumi)

Ketch…just because you CAN pass info from Azmodeus to the boys doesn’t mean you WILL. Thank you AGAIN, Cas, for stating the SHOULD BE OBVIOUS

I’m not saying the angels should take Lucifer’s offer (he’ll make more angels and give them back their wings in exchange for making him the indisputable ruler of heaven) but it’s a tempting offer

Omg they actually did it. They made him ruler of heaven.

I DID NOT RECOGNIZE HIM. GABRIEL?!?! THEY BROUGHT GABRIEL BACK?! He’s been imprisoned in Hell for who knows how long?!

“Twice Upon a Time”

Plot Description: the twelfth Doctor must face his past to decide his future

I love that the “previously on” took us back 709 episodes

Uh oh. If the first Doctor doesn’t regenerate (I know he eventually will), will twelve start to back to the future disappear?

I should not have gone to imdb to see if that was Mycroft…I just got spoiled for actors who will be back (though, if they weren’t, I’d be surprised)

Time is just stopping everywhere for just about everyone. It’s wholly unnerving

No one likes TARDIS redecorations, and One HATES Twelve’s

Hey….it’s occurring to me that Mark Gatiss has already been a character on Doctor Who [insert obligatory England has 12 actors joke here because so has David Bradley but you don’t see me complaining that he took over the ship with the last living dinosaurs and is now the Doctor]

Oh poor Peter. I also thought he was older than he is. Finding out not that long ago that he’s five months older than my dad was jarring. Either my dad looks younger than his age or Peter looks older, but to have to defend to a man born in 1942 that you are younger than him 😭

Twelve having to defend all his decisions to One is hilarious and I can’t believe I came across a post about what your younger self would say if they saw your living space today. One called the dim lighting akin to a restaurant for the French and he’s about to criticize the electric guitar

Also Twelve having to try to stop One from saying casually misogynistic things, you’d hardly believe Moffat wrote Twelve’s lines

I had to pause because seeing Bill again and watching her hug Twelve made me sad

Who’s been stealing the faces of the dead? Like you didn’t take the face of a Pompeiian

I mean, he’s not wrong. They did cut out all the good things the Doctor has done, but “to be fair, they cut out all the jokes” is possibly the funniest way to defend himself

Ok. We can stop with the “a female companion’s job is to clean the TARDIS because I’m the Doctor from the 1960s” jokes now, we MAY continue the “1960s Doctor isn’t up to date with modern tech terms and asks Twelve what browser history is and we watch Twelve become uncomfortable” ones

I’m trying so hard to not say things like “Mycroft would never let that happen to himself” I need you to know how hard I’m trying not to say that when small octopus-like aliens launch themselves at his face

Fuck. She IS a duplicate

Oh, are they actually on Skaro? I didn’t want to hold out hope that those were Daleks

I’m confused as to what Twelve is doing with this particular dalek, but I’m sure it’ll get spelled out eventually. What I’m actually more interested in is why testimony needs all this info from One

He’s spent so much of his time fighting capitalism in space and the future and toxic positivity that he doesn’t know what to do when confronted with a plan that doesn’t sound evil on the surface

Of course not-Mycroft is a Lethbridge-Stewart. The thought had been noodling its way through my brain since I saw that he was just referred to as The Captain on imdb. I love that the Doctor kept his promise to keep watch on his family

HE ADJUSTED THE TIME BY ONLY HOURS AND SAVED THE CAPTAIN’S LIFE BECAUSE OF THE CHRISTMAS ARMISTICE OF 1914 🥹

Ok, FINE, Steven. You got me. You pierced my heart with One thinking that THIS is what it means that his future selves are a Doctor of War 😭

I know it’s not over yet but I was promised another special guest…THERE SHE ISSSS!! There’s Clara 😭😭

His smile when he sees and remembers herrrrrrrrrrr

Godddddd he’s so happy

Twelve’s arc is so so so wonderful. He started out with Clara being his “carer” (she cares so he doesn’t have to) and now he cares SO MUCH. Possibly TOO much

Him giving advice to the next Doctor before he regenerates 😭 I just…

Ok much as I do like Jodie’s Doctor outfit, I do sort of wish she could have had Twelve’s

[rere-the-writer]

Title- 'Running from a good thing.'

Warnings: Fluff, Angst, Soft!Mikaelson

Pairings- Elijah Mikaelson x F!Reader x Rebekah Mikaelson

Summary- You left one stormy night hiding a secret after Hayley talked to you leaving both Elijah and Rebekah heart broken looking for you. You were now with two hunter brothers that saved you from a nest of vampires.

'They will never believe you. They won't accept it like they did Hope.'

Hayley's words rang in your head as you quickly packed, tears fell from your eyes. It hurt, the thought of leaving Rebekah and Elijah but Hayley was so sure in what she told you.

'You saw how Klaus reacted when I was pregnant with Hope. Whose to say they would be just as understanding?'

You didn't know where you could go, you couldn't return to Mystic Falls as you left behind your friends for Rebekah and Elijah. You went to New Orleans with them finding hard to live without the Originals.

When you stared dating the two Originals when they both showed interest in you, the orphan girl that Zach Salvatore took in. Elijah had informed you that it wasn't the first time the siblings shared lovers. You knew even if you went back to Mystic Falls that would be the first place they'll look.

"Lebanon, Kansas."

When the Mikaelsons came home, Rebekah rushed up to you as Elijah groaned tired sinking into the couch waiting for Rebekah to come down with you.

"Y/N is gone!" Elijah sat up all tiredness he felt went away as he joined Klaus and Kol who was looking up at Rebekah.

"Are you sure she didn't go out with Camille and Davina?"

"No Kol....her clothes are gone as if she packed up." Rebekah said as Elijah rushed up to your bedroom frowning as Hayley walked in carrying Hope on her hip.

"What's going on?"

"Y/N is gone." Klaus answered her as he and Kol watched her closely as they knew Hayley was in love with Elijah and knew how she felt about you.

"Oh yeah, she said something about a trip with old friends." Hayley said lying smoothly as Elijah frowned looking at Hayley.

"Impossible. Y/N always tells me and Rebekah if she has plans."

"Elijah, the last time she ran off like this was when her brothers learned of the relationship."

"Meaning something is wrong and she believes we wouldn't understand." Elijah said frowning as worry racked his body and Rebekah hugged Elijah hoping you were okay. Kol called Davina and Freya to come do a locater spell to find you.

A year passed since you left New Orleans and now settled with two hunters and their Angel after saving you from a nest of vampires. You missed your vampire lovers but Hayley's words would rang in your head everytime you thought of calling or going back.

"Y/N, Erik. We're home!" You heard Dean call out and you picked up the baby boy walking out smiling at Sam and Dean. Erik squealed seeing Sam reaching for the hunter who was happy to take the boy.

"Hey guys. Where's Cas?"

"Right here." Castiel said smiling at you as you hugged him. Castiel had been a huge help with Erik which Dean found to be adorably disgusting.

"How was the hunt?"

"Went by smoothly. On the way back we picked up on a new case in New Orleans." Dean said tossing Erik in the air making the baby laugh.

"Oh?" You said quietly you told the brothers about your past as to not hide anything. And to give you peace of mind they promised no big hunts in New Orleans unless needed.

"Look we know you said no hunts in New Orleans but a group of demons are up to something there."

"So Dean and I thought it would be good if you and Erik come with us. Get you both out of the bunker while we take out the demons."

"I don't know....."

"Come on. You can spoil Erik and the little guy can get some time out in the sun and fresh air."

"Okay. That sounds nice." You said giving in their puppy dog faces.

"I got dinner done by the way." You say getting cheers from Dean as Sam shook his head smiling.

The impala drove into New Orleans and you felt a bit of heart ache as the car stopped. You got out putting Erik in a baby carrier as Sam and Dean got out.

"We are going to go check out the crime scene. Here, enjoy the city we be back later to go out for dinner." Dean tells you as you nodded taking the money then watched the brothers drive off.

You walked around going to different shops as Erik babble holding your finger. A familiar face caught your attention and swallowed seeing it was Davina who smiled brightly seeing you as she jogged over.

"Y/N!? Where have you been? Rebekah and Elijah has been looking all over for you."

"Places.....humm." You said as you were unsure what to say as her eyes fell on the baby boy that looked awful like Elijah. Erik babble getting your attention as he looked at the new person.

"Y/N can you come with me?"

"De, I don't...."

"Please. I won't take you to the Abattoir. I just need to know something." Davina says as you nodded. You found yourself in Vincent's place having Erik standing in your lap bouncing. Erik was unbothered by Davina poking his finger with a needle to get his blood.

"Erik is Elijah's son."

"But how Vincent? Non of the witches did a spell for it nor did Freya." Davina tells Vincent who looked to you as you swallowed as they walked over.

"Y/N, do you know how you became pregnant?"

"No I don't....I didn't go to any witches nor did I go to Freya." You tell Vincent as Erik sat in your lap kicking his legs smiling.

"So that's why you left because of your pregnancy?"

"Yes. I'm sorry for causing trouble but I need to get going now." You say standing grabbing your bag rushing out the door as Vincent and Davina called your name.

"Y/N?" Kol whispered as you brushed pass him and Klaus both watching you hurrying away as Davina rushed out frowning seeing that you were gone.

"Davina?"

"We need to tell you something." Davina tells Klaus and Kol with a frown. You knew this was a bad idea but couldn't blame Sam and Dean as the brothers wanted what was best for you as you headed for the diner you all would meet up at.

"She had Elijah's son?!" Klaus said after calling an emergency family meeting as Vincent explained what was going on. Elijah sat in shock with Rebekah who was rubbing his hand.

"Y/N didn't tell us why?"

"That she didn't tell us." Davina says sighing as she recalls how nervous you were. Elijah stood fixing his suit jacket with unreadable look.

"Then let's find her and bring her home."

You sat in the diner with Sam and Dean talking and laughing as Dean was telling you what happened on the hunt. You were rubbing Erik's back as he slept with it being late.

"So you ran into an old friend?"

"Yeah....Davina and she most likely told everyone about Erik." You say softly looking down as Sam who was sitting next to you rubbing your back.

"Are you sure they wouldn't accept Erik? From what you told me and Sammy, Elijah and Rebekah loves you something fierce."

"Come on Dean. Hayley had a point, how would I explain that I was pregnant? They could accept Hope because they could explain it but Erik?"

"Yeah but you can find out how." Sam says taking a bite out of his salad as you blinked looking at him.

"How?"

You rocked Erik as he whimpered uncomfortable with being at a crossroads. Sam and Dean thought summoning Crowley to explain how you fell pregnant would help and of course Castiel stayed close to you and Erik not trusting demon.

"Hello moose and squirrel. Oh you brought the little rabbit." Crowley said smirking then it was wiped off his face when his eyes landed on Erik.

"You bought an Original's child with you? Are you kidding me?!" Crowley growled looking at the hunters with narrowed eyes.

"You know about Erik?"

"Yes I know about the boy! As any smart supernatural being would." Crowley says looking around nervous which made the brothers look at one another as it wasn't everyday the demon King was nervous.

"You okay there Crowley?"

"No I am not Winchester. You have both the mate of two Originals and his son so understandably I am on edge."

"Crowley. They are just vampires." Dean says as the look on Crowley's face was they hadn't seen before.

"They aren't just vampires Winchester. They could kill me without blinking these aren't like the ones you kill. They are one of the most feared beings."

"Are you serious?"

"Every. When we all heard that the son of Elijah Mikaelson had been born. Everyone knew to stay clear." Crowley said as you stepped forward after passing Erik to Castiel.

"Do you know how it was possible for me to get pregnant?"

"From my understanding there was a powerful witch that cast a spell then was killed. That is all I know." Crowley said disappearing leaving you all a bit confused.

Next morning Sam and Dean went out to see Benny who was out in the bayou asking if you wanted to join but you declined. You were walking with Erik in his baby carrier strapped to your chest as you walked though a witch's market.

"I found her Elijah." Marcel said after calling the Original when he saw you walking with bags in your hand of things for Erik.

"There she is." Rebekah breathed staring as you were looking at artists that were painting or drawing as Erik babbled smiling.

"There is your son Elijah." Klaus says as Elijah stared at the toddler strapped to you then to you. Both Rebekah and Elijah noted you had cut your hair and still had a bit of baby weight but you were still breathing taking beautiful to them.

They growled seeing a man show up next to you and how you smiled brightly at him and how the boy also smiled brightly at the man. The three Originals listen in on your conversation.

"You have bought a lot of things for Erik."

"Only the best for this little guy Cas." You tell Castiel as Erik let out an excited squeal making you look to see what he was staring at the got him all worked up. You stopped hold your breath seeing Elijah and Rebekah as both stared back.

"It seems he knows who his father is." Castiel commented as Erik was squealing reaching for the suit wearing Original.

"Yeah it seems so." You say swallowing watching they walking up to you. You had many emotions swirl in you and your heart began to ache seeing the soft look in their eyes.

You were soon back in the Abattoir holding Erik in your lap even though the boy was reaching for his father. It was just you, Rebekah and Elijah in the den as both Klaus and Kol let you three talk it out.

"Why did you run from us?" Rebekah asked she wasn't angry instead she sounded hurt, hurt that you didn't trust then enough to tell them about your pregnancy.

"Hayley said you wouldn't be as understanding as you were with her." You say softly looking away from them as in a flash Elijah was in front of you. Erik touched Elijah's face as Rebekah came sitting next to you.

"You are our lover, our beloved. Of course we would have understood. Elijah and I love you so deeply that we would die for you."

"Rebekah is right. We tore up the city looking for you." Elijah says grabbing Erik's hands smiling softly as the boy squealed putting his mouth on Elijah's hand.

"I sorry....I just...scared and Hayley told me all these things. I didn't mean to cause trouble." You said tearing up as Elijah gently took Erik and Rebekah wrapped you up in her arms.

"Shhh love. We weren't angry with you." Rebekah says her tone gentle as you sniffled feeling her kiss your head. Elijah looked at Erik seeing the boy staring back babbling softly.

"You'll be sure to visit right?" Dean asked hugging you after dropping your things off while Elijah was watching with Rebekah who was holding Erik.

"Yeah of course Dean. Thank you for everything."

"We're going to miss you and Erik." Sam says as you smiled hugging the tall hunter.

"If you both miss me too much just come to visit." You say as they nodded smiling and drove off. You turned seeing your lovers and son smiling you walked up as Elijah put an arm around you.

"No more running?"

"No more running." You promised as Elijah and Rebekah took you inside listening to Erik babble.

[nevadawasnottaken]

love languages

the love language of dream smp members :) (platonic for minors! romantic for others) im doing them all bc they all deserve recognition! :D keep in mind i dont know all of their personalities well! (hbomb, antfrost, ponk, lazarbeam, etc) these are all c!dsmp (in game) those marked with * are ones im uncertain about/unfamiliar with! -- dream: gift giving or acts of service with a twinge of physical touch. mans will get anything for you, no lie. you want it? hes got it. dream xd: acts of service or gift giving. possibly touch, but i dont see him being keen on it unless its in private. i see him as someone who tries to spoil his s/o a lot. if youre a worthy lover of a god, you should be treated like one. george: probably acts of service, quality time and touch. man would probably cuddle with you while watching some movie that neither of you pay attention to. sapnap: touch or words of affirmation. he does like giving gifts on occasion though! probably something thatll remind you of him. but overall, he prefers hand holding or something. he likes knowing youre there. callahan*: quality time. i imagine he likes going places all over the smp. it makes him happy to take you places that he finds beautiful. even better when you find them beautiful too! sam: acts of service for sure. he would make you tea (or your preferred drink) on a bad day and wrap you in blankets and cuddle as much as youd like. or, he would leave you alone if you need it. hes very caring, warden persona aside. sam nook: gift giving seems his thing! or acts of service! he seems as if he would get you things to cheer you up, or just simply do things like tuck you in. if you want, he gladly will let you pet his lil ears. (yes i hc that sam nook has lil ears :) ) alyssa*: even if we dont see her much, she strikes me as the type to enjoy physical touch. hand holding or something simple. she prefers to stay out of the thick of things and chill, thanks. ponk*: touch or words of affirmation i think are very fitting. he seems the type to always have an arm around you or holding your hand. he definitely would be good at comforting, i think. badboyhalo: i think we can all agree that hes a mix of everything. i think hes most oriented with words of affirmation and quality time. he likes spending time with you, just telling you all the things he loves about you. tommy: more than likely quality time. i dont see him as one to like holding hands (”me? hold hands? grOSS! step away and leave some space for the holy spirit!”) or anything. hes not good with words of affirmation (he needs them, really) and hes a bit awkward with things like hand holding. so spending time with him is his thing. listening to his discs and joking around with you and tubbo is what makes him happy. tubbo: gift giving, touch and quality time. he likes spending time with those he cares for, as well as giving them gifts. little trinkets, mostly. for example, he gave ghostbur a bracelet woven from friends wool, and hes given tommy a ruby! :) fundy: probably gifts. fox man will find you shiny things. emeralds, diamonds, gold, you name it. even if you dont need/want it, he gets you things. rings and necklaces and bracelets. it makes him happy to see you wear them. not all at once, of course, but wear them nonetheless. punz*: acts of service and touch. hes the type to arrange your things to suprise you or leave you flowers on a bad day. he also would probably cuddle and ramble about how perfect you are to him. purpled*: quality time. i think he would gladly spend time with you if you asked him to :) wilbur: a little bit of everything, i think. but one thing i think he would definitely do is write songs, so basically making playlists, but he sings for you instead! but for one of the main ones, i think he mostly is one for touch and affirmations. he likes being comforted/comforting you. ghostbur: gift giving or touch. quality time, too! i think he likes giving you things (like blue!) in general. he also seems very clingy (which is adorable <3 anyone who says its not can fight me rn) and would gladly hold your hand! he often will just take it anyways. :) (”i like holding your hand! your hands are nice to hold because theyre warm!”) schlatt: quality time. like tommy, i think he isnt one for touch. maybe he will give you gifts, but spending time with him is enough of a gift for him. skeppy*: gift giving. he would probably get you big gifts, like stuffed animals or something. or photos. seems like a skeppy type thing to me. :) eret: a little of everything, i think. but i see his thing being touch and quality time. i think they would very gladly cuddle if you asked them to! but shes big spoon, no doubt about it. only little spoon if you ask. jack manifold*: acts of service or touch. he would make you food if you wanted it, i think, or hold your hand. maybe not the best with comfort or cooking, but he tries. (”look i- i know the cookies arent good, but its the thought that counds, right?”) niki: words of affirmation, quality time and touch would all be nikis thing! :) she would spend time with you, probably cuddling and providing comfort if needed. she would remind you every day that youre loved and youre worth it. quackity: definitely touch and quality time. when hes not busy, he takes you places. often to watch the sunset. he also strikes me as one for pda! a bit shy at first, but relaxes into it. hes definitely one to say “gotta show off my partner! >:)” mexican dream*: words of affirmation but in spanish dont @ me karl: do we need to even question this? (spoiler alert: quality time and touch) hbomb*: strikes me as the type for quality time and some touch :) techno: probably acts of service, gift giving and quality time. he likes holidays like christmas and your birthday because he can give you things. he likes shiny things! and he likes you, so he gives them to you! antfrost*: quality time and touch seem fitting. just the peace of being together. philza: quality time and gift giving with a bit of touch. he likes when you touch his wings, running your fingertips over the smooth feathers, or fixing any ruffled spots. he also likes spending quiet time together. he can give words of affirmation and comfort if you need them. connor*: probably touch! i see him as the type to want to hold your hand a lot. so def one for pda :) puffy: probably quality time and words of affirmation. goat mom would def be able to encourage and comfort you. vikkstar*: i think touch is fitting :) pda really, and acts of service lazarbeam*: acts of service seem most fitting! he seems the type to do things for you, especially on bad days. ranboo: gift giving and quality time! he is definitely the type to get you little things! or grass blocks. he gets sad if you rid of a grass block, so you kinda have to store em. or kindly explain that you dont want dirt inside, so you can put the grass blocks outside. foolish: the type for acts of service, i think! and maybe some touch. i think he gladly will do things for you, no questions asked. (unless it seems harmful ofc!) hannah*: seems the type to like words of affirmation (giving and receiving!) especially on your/her bad days. slimecicle: gift giving. he probably picks you flowers and does nice things whilst being sarcastic. he will comfort you on bad days, though. -- as usual, lmk if i should change tags! requests are open! 

[connorswhisk]

12 for Samtory?

"I think we need to talk."

Sam snorts derisively. "I have nothing to say to you. So why don't you just go back to stealing my best friend from me, huh?"

Tory sighs, grits her teeth. "That's just it. Aisha wants me to try and make this work. She wants the three of us to be friends, and - " An irritated exhale of breath. "I don't want to let her down."

Sam doesn't want to let Aisha down, either, but this is so stupid. "You hate me, remember?" she says, and maybe she's egging Tory on, but maybe she doesn't care. "I'm a spoiled little princess, right?"

Tory's jaw clenches. She scuffs her sneakers in the gravel of Sam's father's dojo's driveway, pointedly avoiding eye contact.

"Don't make this any harder than it has to be, La - Samantha." She shrugs her shoulders. "If Aisha likes both of us, then there's gotta be some way we can get along."

"You'd have to stop going after my ex, in order for that to happen," Sam snaps, and Tory looks up.

"What?" She shakes her head. "I'm not into Miguel. Trust me, I'm really not."

"And why should I believe that?" Sam demands. "You two are always so close with each other."

"Because." Tory points to a small bracelet on her wrist, one Sam's never noticed before. It's woven with different colored yarns - pinks, oranges, and whites. "I'm gay as fuck, Sam."

Sam blinks. "You're - Oh. Ok."

"Yeah." Tory swallows. "And I'm willing to try and fix things, for Aisha. Are you?"

Sam thinks about that. And then she thinks about her father and Johnny Lawrence. And then she says, heart pounding in her ears,

"Ok. I guess I am."

Tory doesn't smile, but her shoulders lose some of their tension - and it's a start.

[maximons]

Okay! I’m back from seeing Multiverse of Madness, and I got some thoughts. I’m gonna put some spoilers under the cut, but it was pretty solid. It wasn’t exactly the movie I had hoped it would be though. And no, I don’t mean in an ‘I wanted more cameos’ way, but really just a movie called ‘Multiverse of Madness’ feels like it should’ve been...bigger than it was? Idk, I don’t mind a good character study, but using the multiverse to do it just fell a little flat to me.

But again, it was a pretty solid movie. I had fun, and it was definitely way different than any other MCU film, which is always refreshing. I sure want Sam Raimi to come back for a Doctor Strange 3, because I think what he brings to the character made him way more compelling than we’ve seen so far imo.

TLDR; Fell flat in some ways, and I had some personal grievances, but overall a good character study with some awesome (and fucking terrifying at times) action. Would see again, but maybe not till it hits Disney+. 7.5/10

Spoiler talk under the cut

Okay, so as someone who was a dummy and actually did spoil myself beforehand, I was actually still pretty surprised at how some things turned out. Note to self: Don’t let stan twitter tell you how things are gonna unfold before seeing how they actually unfold.

 I’m just gonna go on a bullet point rant from here on out so prepare for that.

So many people online led me to believe that they just turned Wanda evil out of nowhere with no explanation but like....they said several times she was corrupted by the Darkhold? Did ya’ll miss that? I’m not saying that it makes what she did okay cause...oof girl made some choices, but still. 

While yeah, Wanda does some pretty fucked up things in this movie, people acting like she’s this irredeemable monster...relax. If you can forgive Loki, you can easily forgive Wanda down the line. Shit, Hawkeye killed more people than Wanda did here, but I’m not gonna start a whole debate over it. Wanda was for sure the villain here, but the way some people are treating her compared to others that have done objectively worse?...Yeah, don’t sit right with me, but anyway.

Side note, defending Wanda from these antis is gonna be waaay more annoying to deal with now.

There’s a lot of talk of how this movie ‘throws away Wanda’s development from WandaVision’ by making her the villain, which eh...I see their point, but WandaVision did end with her reading the Darkhold, so it’s not surprising this is where she ended up here. Still, it does seem like a rehash of her doing a bad thing and then fixing it in the end. Just way more extreme.

Nobody actually thinks she’s dead....right? Like the way people were talking about it, I thought I was gonna have to reach and be in denial about her being alive for my sanity, but nah. It’s not super obvious, but...it’s pretty obvious she survived. Big bright flashing red light out of nowhere for no reason? C’mon. Also the whole thing just sorta...happened. If that was Wanda, been in the MCU for 7 years and just finished headlining her own show, Maximoff’s death scene...it would’ve been a SCENE, trust.

The way the movie flip flopped between ‘Wanda’s a good person, she’s just corrupted’ and ‘She’s an evil witch that needs to die’ so much just gave me whiplash. I get why towards the end they were like ‘yeah, we gotta kick her ass’, but almost immediately Strange went from ‘You did the right thing, that was never in doubt’ to ‘SHE ENSLAVED A TOWN, GOTTA GET HER’ Like...which is it my guy? 

Okay, moving on from Wanda now, let’s talk about America. I love her. She’s my favorite new Phase 4 hero as of now, and I can’t wait to see more of her.

I like how they introduced her as someone not having any control over her powers, and while I get that people see that as nerfed, it makes sense. She’s a kid with powers adults can’t even handle, and she’s handling better than most adults would, so.

Also...the scene with her moms? That was enough to cause a ban in all these countries?...Really? I just...okay. Good luck over there.

Strange’s development in this movie was pretty good. I really don’t think Wanda stole the focus at all honestly, this was very clearly Strange’s movie. I liked him better here way more than his first movie.

The CAMEOSSS Specifically REED FUCKING RICHARDS YOOO. That was so surreal to me actually seeing John Krasinski play him. I trulyyyy hope he’s the main Reed, there’s no way he can’t be after this.

Black Bolt and Charles's death scenes are gonna haunt me man, they’re just...oof they’re brutal.

DID ANYONE ELSE CATCH THE 90S X-MEN THEME WHEN HE WAS WHEELING OUT CAUSE MY GOD

Last thing, I really wanted this to be a team up movie with Strange and Wanda, they’d be an awesome team. I’m sad we didn’t get that, but...maybe one day

Okay, those are my jumbled up thoughts on this movie. This is gonna be one I think about for a while for sure

[arctickat2400]

Gender Reveal <> (Soft) Bucky Barnes

“I can’t believe it! This is so exciting!” Wanda squealed. “We have to do something for them, throw them a party or something!” Wanda suggested as she and Natasha walked through the halls of Stark Tower.

“That’s actually a really good idea. I know Y/N wants to be surprised, so we could do a gender reveal party. I can get the gender from Barnes and I have the perfect way for it to be revealed.” Natasha planned.

“EEEEEEEEEE! This is going to be so fun!” Wanda squeaked. Natasha rolled her eyes with a smug smile as they left to plan the party.

Meanwhile, Y/N laid on the bed in the med bay of the tower as the doctor guided the wand around her extended belly. The screen showed Y/N’s and Bucky’s unborn child, about 4 months along. Y/N felt Bucky’s hand tighten gently around hers when her head shot to look at him, but he was too focused on his son or daughter to notice.

Bucky never thought he’d have the chance to become a father, never thought he’d have the chance to find love considering his haunting past. But now that he’s found Y/N, he knows anything could be possible. And now, the Winter Soldier who was unable to ever cry has tears building up in his eyes. He couldn’t believe the sight in front of him, just like he couldn’t believe the words Y/N had told him when she announced that she was pregnant. He couldn’t be happier, something he never thought he’d experience again.

“Would we like to know the gender?” The doctor's words knocked Bucky from his thoughts as he looked at you.

“We would actually like it to be a surprise please.” You told your doctor with a kind smile. It was Bucky’s favorite.

“Alright. I’ll go print out the ultrasound pictures for you and fix up an envelope with the gender inside for you. It’ll just take a minute, then you’re free to go.” She explained to you, smiling before walking out of the room.

Once getting cleaned up and Bucky taking the envelope, he takes your hand and leads you to the elevator, pressing the button for your floor. Just as you were about to walk down the hall to your room, Natasha runs up to your both, stopping Bucky in his tracks.

“Hey, can I talk to you?” She pointed the question to Bucky. He looked to you for assurance and you told him you’d meet him in your room when he was done.

“What’s up?” Bucky questioned when Y/N was out of earshot.

“I was hoping I could get the baby’s gender. Wanda and I want to throw Y/N a gender reveal party.” Natasha explained with an excited smile. She was getting more hyped for the party the closer it got.

Bucky chuckled lightly at the sweet thought of a surprise party for his wife and child. He began nodding his head, taking the envelope from his back pocket, telling Natasha to be careful with it and to keep it secret. He knows you would kill him if he’d given away an important secret that could get out to everyone before it even got to you.

“Thanks, Buck. She’s gonna love it, I swear.” Natasha jumped excitedly, rushing back the way she came. Bucky smiled and walked to meet up with his wife.

Two days later, and the secret of the surprise gender reveal hasn’t gotten out surprisingly with the amount of big mouths in this building. But the party was ready and on the go.

Natasha and Wanda had told Bucky to take you out to your favorite cafe for lunch while they got everyone gathered and the last details ready. It was almost time, you and Bucky making your way back up to the common room. You gladly had no idea what’s going on, somehow, despite your heightened senses since you became pregnant.

You walked hand in hand with Bucky into the common room of the tower and almost jumped out of your skin when all the Avengers and your friends shouted, “Surprise!” to you. You laughed with a bright red blush to your cheeks. You held onto Bucky’s arm and leaned against him.

You gazed around the room and saw it all set up with decorations in blue and red. Yes, everyone usually chooses pink for a girl. But you didn’t like pink all that much and you wanted to mix it up a bit. Plus, red is just a darker shade of pink, so the same difference.

Anyways, you saw a table set up with blue and red chocolate cupcakes, your favorite. A string of fairy lights hung above it with all your ultrasound photos hung up by mini clothespins. You saw blue and red balloons around the room and a large black balloon on the bar, holding the color of the gender of your baby, a target behind it. It was a small party, just as you like it. Talking with friends and the Avengers and such, eating cupcakes, and of course, finding out the gender of Baby Barnes.

“You guys,” You were just about brought to tears. Stupid hormones. You walked into the common room further, catching the faces of your two best friends, Wanda and Natasha. And, by the looks of it, you knew this was all their idea. “You are amazing! This is so sweet.” You smiled, your hand on your heart.

“Well, fortunately, you’ve made your husband of a soldier here go soft, so it wasn’t hard for him to hand over the envelope.” Natasha says smugly.

“You knew about this?” You looked up at your husband, your hand on his chest.

“Well, I was only the messenger and the one to stall my beautiful babies.” Bucky admitted, wrapping his arms around you.

“You really have gone soft, and I love you all the more for it.” You smiled as you leaned up and he leaned down, connecting your lips in a gentle kiss.

The party had started, Tony turning on some music and you went around to say hi to everyone, especially your old long time friends. You rarely see them anymore, unlike all your Avenger friends who you basically live with. You talked to everyone, catching up, answering questions about yourself, Bucky, the baby so far, and whatever else they needed to know.

Halfway through the party, and several cupcakes eaten by yourself, guilty as charged, Natasha announced it was time to find out the gender of your baby. And when you say Bucky wasn’t too happy about the way you would find out, it was a tiny bit of an understatement. Once Natasha walked up to you with your battle weapon of choice, your bow and arrow, Bucky’s protectiveness shot up tenfold.

Bucky’s always so protective of you and you loved him for it. He’s just afraid of something happening to you or the baby, the best things to ever happen to him.

“I don’t know about this, doll. I don’t want to ruin this for you, but maybe you should let me do it.” He suggested, looking at you with concern in his eyes. It was sincere and you thought maybe, just to ease his mind, you should let him do it. You understood where he was coming from. You’ve had pregnancy complications in the past. You lost a baby only a month into the pregnancy. Since then, as you got further into your present one, Bucky hasn’t wanted you to pick up anything heavy, or add any unnecessary strength or weight to your body.

“Bucky, baby, it’s fine. I know I’m not as strong as I once was. But, I’ll be okay. Just one arrow, we’ll find out what the baby is, and everything will be okay.” You told him, your hand on his chest as you spoke. You were always touching him to assure him that you were okay.

He hesitated for a few seconds, but finally agreed. “Fine. It’ll be okay.” He answered, but you knew he was more reassuring himself than you.

When it was time to find out the gender, Natasha handed you your bow and an arrow before you loaded it in. Bucky stood close behind you, nervously for your well being, but also excited to find out what his baby will be.

You pulled back, straining a bit at the extra effort it took to pull back the string. You aimed and shot the arrow as it popped the black balloon, catching a bullseye to target behind it as red exploded about the room. You screamed in excitement as you turned towards Bucky, a huge smile on his face as he picked you up carefully and spun you around. He kissed the side of your head, setting you down and you both turned towards you friends, big smiles on everyone’s faces as y’all cheered and celebrated together.

Bucky kneeled down at your waist, setting his hands on your belly, his smile never ending, and began talking to his daughter.

“Hey, baby girl. Your mom and I love you so much. This is your daddy, by the way.” You carded your fingers through Bucky’s hair as he spoke, smiling down at him. “You’re gonna be so spoiled by all your aunt’s and uncles. Uncle Tony will buy you so many things, and Auntie Nat will be your best friend, well besides me.” Everyone watched and listened as they found this sight adorable. “But don’t listen to anything your Uncle Sam has to say. He doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”

Everyone let out strong laughs at the accusation as you placed your hand on top of Bucky’s on your belly. He glanced up at you with the most adoring glimmer in his eyes. He placed a kiss to your belly before standing up, placing his hands on either of your cheeks before placing a passionate kiss to your lips.

[petersasteria]

good 4 u || harry holland

sour masterlist || harry || sour taglist

1,589 words sorry for the shit ending ?? bc i didnt know how to end it lmao italics are flashbacks

* * * *

“Babe, you didn’t have to spoil me.” You chuckled.

“You deserve it, love. You deserve the world.” Harry looked at you lovingly before pressing a sweet kiss on your lips.

-

“I really want to be a professional photographer and filmmaker, you know?” Harry told you one day. Both of you were lying wide awake in bed, staring at the ceiling. Both of you couldn’t sleep, so you talked about random things.

“I believe in you, Harry. I believe in you more than anyone or anything. You can do just that. I support you.” You smiled as you turned your head to face him. He looked at you and grinned, “So, you think I’m really going to be those things?”

“Yeah. Why not? You’re an amazing photographer and filmmaker. Believe in yourself, Harry. My faith in you will be nothing if you don’t believe in yourself. Trust me.” You told him.

“That’s true. You’re right.” Harry said before yawning.

“I’m always right.” You curled up against him and rested your head on his chest. He chuckled and kissed the top of your head.

-

“Harry, where are you? I’ve been waiting out here for an hour now.” You said through the phone. Harry said he’d pick you up from your university, but he wasn’t there yet. Then it began to rain heavily, causing you to run to the nearest shade. You were cold, wet, and impatient.

“I’ll be there in a while. See you later!” Harry hung up.

After thirty minutes, Harry finally arrived. You quickly got in and sighed in relief when you realized the whole car was warm.

“What took you so long?” You asked him.

“My car’s acting up. I hate this old piece of shit.” Harry grumbled as he tried to start the car. After five tries, it finally worked.

“You need a new car.” You laughed.

“Yeah, I do.” He chuckled.

-

“I hope I’m not interrupting your sleepover or whatever.” Harry said quietly through the phone. You were at your friend, Elouise’s slumber party because it was her birthday.

“No, you’re not. We’re just watching a movie and I’ve seen this movie a bunch of times.” You assured him. You walked out of the living room and went to the kitchen. You sat on the bar stool and asked, “What’s up?”

“Mum and dad are just being mean, that’s all.” Harry sighed.

“I know you’re about to cry, so just let it out. Talk to me.” You said softly. Harry started sobbing and telling you about his fight with his parents.

“Y/N/N, I got offered an apprenticeship in Dublin. That’s the biggest opportunity I’ve ever received and they’re stopping me. It’s like they don’t want me to succeed, but when Tom wants something done, they let him. It’s so fucking tiring. I never asked them for anything and the one time I do, they say shit. It’s unfair.” He sobbed and your heart broke for him.

“I feel you. I legit feel the same way, but we just have to prove them wrong, yeah? You’ll make it big and what they say won’t matter as much anymore. They love you and they just want what’s best for you, but sometimes they don’t exactly know what’s best for you. It’s weird, I swear. Just prove them wrong. You’ll get another opportunity again and when you get that, it’ll be bigger than that apprenticeship in Dublin.” You told him with a small smile on your face.

“You get me so well.” Harry smiled as he wiped his tears. “I’ll just go to sleep now. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

-

You couldn’t take it anymore. Harry’s face seemed to be everywhere you went, haunting you. After being together for two and a half years, Harry broke up with you because of reasons only he seemed to know. After he broke up with you, you spent the whole week just crying. You didn’t understand, but life was really cruel.

Three weeks later, word got out that Harry was dating some model and that surprised you. It surprised you because he moved on really quick and he looked really happy and healthy. He looked better compared to when he was dating you. You were proud of him, but it made you wonder why Harry chose to make himself better for this girl and not for you when you were together. It seemed unfair.

Unfortunately, you were still friends with Sam. You were Sam’s favorite and he actually preferred you instead of Harry’s new girlfriend. Wanting to hang out with you, You and Sam met up at the mall and just shop or walk around. You couldn’t really hang out at Sam’s house because of Harry and his girlfriend.

“She’s nice, but I’m on your side.” Sam said as he ate his ice cream. You laughed and shook your head. Sam looked at you and said, “I’m serious! She’s trying to make me her best friend or something. Like, she’s trying really hard.”

“Then try to be her friend. Maybe you guys might click and then you’ll replace me like how Harry replaced me.” You said. You were aware it was petty and pathetic, but you couldn’t help it. This time, it was Sam who laughed.

“You know, I overheard him the other day. He told her that she’s the only person who gets him and I’m just sitting there all confused because he said the same thing to you. In fact, it’s like he forgot all about you.” Sam said as he animatedly spoke with his hands. He seemed really annoyed.

“Okay, then.” You chuckled. “You seem annoyed.”

“Yeah because I thought both of you were it for each other.” He said with a sad smile. You returned it, but didn’t say anything.

At the end of the day, it was time for both of you to go home. Sam groaned in frustration as he texted while walking. “What?” You asked, turning your head to look at him.

Both of you stopped walking when you reached the mall’s exit. Sam was typing furiously as you looked at him in confusion. “What’s wrong?” You asked.

He looked at you and sighed, “Tom can’t pick me up.”

“I thought you drove here?” You asked and he shook his head. “What happened to your car?”

“My parents borrowed it because their car is in the shop, getting fixed. Tom can’t pick me up because he has to use his car to go to an event that he forgot about. I’d call for an Uber or something, but I literally have zero money on me. So, I have no choice but to ask Harry.” Sam said, biting his lip.

“Well, shit.” Was all you said as Sam looked at you with guilt all over his face. He quickly sent a text to Harry and he smiled a bit when he immediately got a reply.

“He’s coming soon.” Sam told you. You snorted. You vividly remember Harry’s slow and beat up car. Sam was talking to you, but you weren’t really paying attention. Your mind went to all those times you spent in Harry’s old car and all the places you’ve been. Those were moments you’ll never forget.

“Y/N, my ride’s here.”

You were pulled from your thoughts as soon as Harry said that. You looked at the direction that Sam was looking at and you were surprised to see a beautiful, new car. It was charcoal grey and the windows were so clean, you could see the inside. Harry was driving and his new girlfriend was sitting on the passenger seat.

“Oh shit. I didn’t know she was coming.” Sam turned to you. “I’m so sorry, Y/N/N. If I had known he was taking her, I wouldn’t-”

“It’s okay. I’m mature and civil. I can handle it. Besides, I can’t avoid them forever. It was bound to happen.” You gave him a small smile.

Harry stopped in front of you both and he rolled his window down. His sunglasses were resting on top of his head and he looked really fresh.

“Are you getting in or not?” He asked Sam, completely ignoring you.

“Hello to you too.” Sam rolled his eyes and crossed his arms as he took a few steps to the door of his backseat. “Y/N, do you need a ride?”

You shook your head, “No, thanks. I’ll call an Uber.” You turned to face Harry, who was already looking at you. “Your photography is improving.” You said.

“Thanks.”

“Nice car, too. I’m glad you replaced the busted ol’ thing.” You chuckled awkwardly.

“Yeah, I figured I should buy myself a new car. The old one wasn’t doing it for me. I need to upgrade, y’know?”

You held back a snappy reply because it wouldn’t do you any good. Plus, you didn’t want to draw attention to yourself. You wanted to ask him if he broke up with you because he needed a girlfriend upgrade, but you kept it to yourself.

“Yeah, that’s nice. Good for you, though… and congrats, I guess.” You gave him a tight-lipped smile and he returned it. Sam got in the car and rolled his window down. “I’ll text you, okay?” Sam said and you just nodded. Harry drove away and you stood there, watching.

You wished you could not care like Harry and you wished you could move on just as quick, but you couldn’t. No matter how hard you tried, you were still stuck on him. It sucked.

* * * *

𝐒𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @celestialholland @alinastarkrovs @piscesparker @prancerrparkerr @spideyspeaches @givebuckyhisplumsnow @blueleatherbag @theonly1outof-a-billion @hollandbroz-n-haz @starlight-starks @webmeupspiderdaddy @studiesinspanish

[ugh-againwiththenames]

So Many Fanfics So Little Time

This is just my list, I have seen so many (but if you want to use it it’s all yours too!).  I’m not a writer.  But I am a hell of a reader. Voracious one might argue. I just wanted to track my progress through the weeds of the absolutely never ending supply of Destiel and Cockles fanfic. 

Read on if you want to see what I’ve read, and what I’ve thought. I am but one person with opinions - some of them may be unpopular - some of them you might agree with, but if you find something you haven’t read here, I encourage you to do so. 

Honestly, this is just so I can track what I have read already, and when my friends ask, I can reference something easily. I have found some different fics on all kinds of ‘best of’ lists all over the interwebs. And I love recs - so rec away friends. 

As someone who reads a solid 40 novels a year typically, I don’t come by the “I read a lot” innocently. I do actually read a LOT.  When not reading fanfic (a new obsession, all things being fair), I usually read a lot of Fantasy/high fantasy, romance/erotica, and or YA (yeah, that was a bit of a ride no?).  So from this one might digress that I like fluffy, cute stories, complicated and supernatural/paranormal type stories, and I sure do not shy away from violence or smut (or maybe violence with smut? *smirk*). 

I have read all of these in the last 2-3 months (I will continue to add as I go). I had never read a fanfic until 2-3 months ago.  A lot of these wonderful people are on here, and I mean you no offence by not directly tagging you - I’m still learning how to actually properly use this site. Links to AO3 are included (and I love you all). 

These aren’t necessarily in any real order - I did read T&S first, followed by 91W, and 4LW...after that it’s just a shit show of Long or Short, Destiel or Cockles - smorgasbord. Some of these are the most popular Fics out there, and others I’ve never seen recc’d anywhere (just sort of accidentally happened upon them).  So let’s get to it, shall we? 

Twist and Shout - ok look. I understand the stigma associated with this one, but it was the FIRST one I read. It was the ball that shot me down the hill, and I haven’t stopped since. So. I loved it. I CRIED like a baby. SOBBED. It was not the quality of the writing but the way the story was developed and delivered. I have Never Cried Like This Reading a Story IN MY LIFE. It’s a rite of passage. Read It and have an opinion - it doesn’t need to be mine.  

Author(s): gabriel, standbyme   https://archiveofourown.org/works/537876/chapters/955188

Ninety-One Whiskey - aka 91W, it is mentioned so much, and is SO worth the read.  I continued my dive into the war fics (not typically my bag really and here I was reading 2 in a row).  There are a couple of followup stories as well to this series (and yes, I’ve read them all).  Although I’ll say that the original is my favourite. I often got lost in a bit of the War/Tactical descriptions, but would recommend it to anyone anyway. Ugh...the “stolen moments”...they were at the same time tragic and the most amazing things ever.  You feel me? no? go read it. 

Author:  komodobits   https://archiveofourown.org/works/2362190/chapters/5214500

Four Letter Word for Intercourse - aka 4LW.  OMG just, OMG. I loved this story. I loved it so much. I think I read it in a day.  Devoured it. It’s so HOT. Just read it. If you haven’t you’re missing out.  LEMME AT IT. I loved “knowing the secret”, and had some major anxiety about that realization dawning (I had to take a breath, and be like, no, no, this is gonna be a mess, but it’s gonna be SO GOOD - I was not disappointed).  There’s more than one work here too - read them all. PLEASE. 

Author: bendingsignpost  https://archiveofourown.org/works/16086839/chapters/37568591

Memories Bring Back Memories (Bring Back You) - This was the first Sobs one I read, but it sent me on a spree.  this is the Memory Loss one.  I have one piece of advice here - read everything by Sobsicles. You can thank me later...just go to her page, and fucking sort to supernatural (or not, read it all!) I’d list them but I’d fucking seriously be here all day.  Also, her tags make me laugh so hard.

Author:  sobsicles https://archiveofourown.org/works/24022945/chapters/57796885

Orpheus - I love this one too, Tattooed!Cas, my LOVE. paired with Mechanic!Dean, my HEART, #help.  Read this one in one evening as well. (I was on a roll).  It’s a one night stand that turns into more (much like my last relationship)....hmm...maybe this is why I was pulled in - although to be fair that is the last similarity to my shitty love life! I do not remember how I stumbled onto this one (tattooed Cas may have been the draw...tbh). Read the warnings though, there is some triggering stuff in this one - but if you can handle it, it’s definitely worth the read. 

Author: sysrae       https://archiveofourown.org/works/2364347/chapters/5220227

Have Love, Will Travel - Can you say no to Stripper!Dean? Cause I sure as hell cannot. Typical sort of character development here with Dean having trust issues, and Cas being painfully awkward...(but in like a super cute way?).  Would Recommend. 

Author: squeemonster   https://archiveofourown.org/works/565455/chapters/1011747

The Inexhaustible Silence of Houses - Change of pace here...It’s got a nice twist.  I didn’t actually clue into how it was going to end until very near the end (maybe I was being oblivious), when the realization came over me and I was...man. I was DONE IN.  I hope that doesn’t spoil (I need some kind of way of remembering them). Voiceless!Cas Hunter!Dean

Author: Askance (doomcountry)   https://archiveofourown.org/works/560268/chapters/1000755

Adagio - This is super short, and super cute. Honestly, I would read the whole thing just for the last line. It’ll take you less than an hour if I remember correctly. Go, I’ll wait. I squeeed. did you? 

Author: noangelsinthegarrison   https://archiveofourown.org/works/1397248/chapters/2928145

Any Little Heartache - super easy read (not in a bad way, but in a ‘you’ll fly through it’ way).  It’s mid-length, not graphic, but really fun hospital AU. HeartSurgeon!Dean / Nurse!Cas - enemies to lovers anyone? Fuck you to Fuck me? yeah. YUM. 

Author: followthattardis https://archiveofourown.org/works/5143376/chapters/11838311

Ad Astra - This is another short(ish) one, just one chapter.  And by that I mean that this is written like a very long poem. Cas as a star who has visited Dean many times over the years of his life, that culminates in 4x01 barn scene. It’s ‘awe’ sad. ‘puppy dog eyes’ sad. The writing format took me a bit to understand what was happening - it’s my lack of poetry knowledge, not the writing.  

Author: nhixxie https://archiveofourown.org/works/1013491

Ad Astra Per Aspera - This is a cute story.  ESL writer, no judgement.  I found this while looking for the one above, and thought the premise looked cute - and it was. Misunderstanding leading to Dean realizing he’s actually Bi.  Miscommunication leading to realization.  

Author: Riverchester https://archiveofourown.org/works/12354336/chapters/28101816

Psalm 40:2 - Time travel post-canon Cas and Pre-series Dean.  If you’re wondering how that works, strap in for this ride, it’s well worth it. 

Author: unicornpoe https://archiveofourown.org/works/30786425/chapters/75992444

Addicted to You - Warlock!Dean/Incubus!Cas - accidental ‘mating’ (I actually really don’t like that word, but there’s sort of no avoiding it in this situation). Cute story.  When you drunk dial a succubus and get an incubus instead...Whatever will we do? 

Author: Ltleflrt https://archiveofourown.org/works/4387346/chapters/9959288 

A Glimpse Beyond - End Fix-it. Not yet complete, 10 chapters so far...I want MORE! Reliving memories Dean/Cas & Sam/Eileen.   

Author: NorthernSparrow https://archiveofourown.org/works/27731689/chapters/67875925

Cas-ti-el - Please I want more...It’s like the story just started. Please write more of this story!! 1 chapter, it’s a trope prompt challenge, but I want it to be a full on story of its own. Imprinted names of their soul mates, Dean doesn’t understand his (because it’s in a different language)...I’m frustrated by wanting this story to keep going. 

Author:  Valinde (Valyria)  https://archiveofourown.org/works/1941591

Our Bodies, Posessed by Light - another short one. Not going to lie, this one took a little getting used to, and I can’t say that I enjoyed it too much for the sole purpose that the premise gave me the willies.  Cas has to vessel jump - ends up in Sam...I got through it, it had a good ending, but yeah, sorry. This just wasn’t for me. 

Author:  obstinatrix  https://archiveofourown.org/works/260289

Peanut Butter Pumpkin Wedding Cake - Waiter!Dean / Writer!Cas - This is so effing cute, just misunderstanding after misunderstanding bumbling around like the couple of dorks that they are. It’s only one chapter. 100% would recommend. 

Author:  Sparseparsley https://archiveofourown.org/works/223962

Destiel, Actually - This is another super cute story, 5 chapters. Gabriel playing a singular role in putting Dean and Cas in awkward positions to push them together.  I fucking DIED at “oh, I am the sub” - needs context, but I guarantee you that you’ll laugh out loud...

Author:  Bexism  https://archiveofourown.org/works/399934/chapters/658398

The Smell Before the Rain - This was my first A/B/O - a big apology to all those who are into mpreg and whatnot, this was my lesson that I am not. this was not for me. Also - I’m a firm Cas (Alpha/Dom) believer, and i’m good with switch Cas, but it’s hard for me to take him being the full Omega here, when paired with the rest I just couldn’t do it. I finished it, but, not my thing. I know now. 

Author: jscribbles https://archiveofourown.org/works/22355230/chapters/53406127

Crazy Diamonds - This is another short one, only 3 chapters - it’s a body swap for Dean, 4x02 him and 2018 him swap places (assumption that 2018 him is “with” Cas).  It’s a super cute little story. 

Author:  pantheon_of_discord https://archiveofourown.org/works/16151642/chapters/37738631

The Breath of All Things - Wheelchair!Dean / Volunteer!Cas.  This is a lovely story, typical Dean self-hatred etc. Triggering for those with suicide warnings. It had me in tears at the end. There’s a really spectacular quote near the end that I found so romantic I screen grabbed it. 

Author:  KismetJeska https://archiveofourown.org/works/994750/chapters/1967519

Kind of a Forever Deal - SummerCamp!AU This is just a really cute and fluffy summer camp AU.  Which is so different from 91W (That’s right, check the author)! I was a little disappointed with the ending, but otherwise really enjoyed this all the way through and was loving all the discovery and young characterizations of all the characters. 

Author: komodobits https://archiveofourown.org/works/999291/chapters/1978478

Everytown, USA - Best way I can break this one down? Wanderer!Dean (listless and without a place in the world, he ends up in a small town...), Twin!Cas (that leads to some fun things). There are a number of points where you’re gonna yell at Dean for doing stupid shit (that are very much in character for him to do), you think, well, yes, obviously you’re going to do that you silly fucking boy [affectionate]; but whyyy? (but we know). 

Author: aileenrose https://archiveofourown.org/works/1797559/chapters/3854836

Chalk and Chainmail - HighSchool!AU, Cas is an artist, Dean LARP’s - it’s cute and angsty. 

Author:  lemonsorbae https://archiveofourown.org/works/804704/chapters/1517551

A Little Patience - Ok. you want smut? This is your story. You want Kink? This is your story.  I actually did not finish this. It got a little carried away in my opinion. It was VERY panty kink oriented (which, while essentially canon isn’t really my kink) so, if you want that Panty Kink on full display? Go forth and enjoy! it  is thirty something chapters, I got to the mid-twenties I Think. 

Author: riseofthefallenone https://archiveofourown.org/works/1750058/chapters/3739232

Control - I REALLY ENJOYED THIS. Which is saying a lot for someone who has already admitted that a Subby Cas isn’t really my HC - so to so thoroughly enjoy a Sub!Cas story? (maybe it’s the tattooes...*wink*). It’s an AU where Cas is the head of a company - Dean is a callboy I guess, for lack of a better term. Just read it.

Author: dothraki_shieldmaiden  https://archiveofourown.org/works/31156601/chapters/76993217

More (I copy pasted the next lot from my google doc, I’ll flush them out later - no i wont...)

Teach Me (short) - movie night in the bunker, things get a little carried away   Author:  Chiyume  https://archiveofourown.org/works/5961327

You Light the Spark (in my bonfire heart) (short) - when cas doesn't realize that dean is unaware of his feelings, super short, super cute                      Author: noangelsinthegarrison https://archiveofourown.org/works/1193910 

Communication Breakdown (short/cockles) - dean ends up in Jensen's head while he films the confession scene, no sexual content Author: jujubiest   https://archiveofourown.org/works/29669601/chapters/72951339

Look What You Made Me Do (short/cockles) -      -  Vegas Con 2020 / jensen comes out with a song     - cute short - no sexual content Author:  green_blue_heller https://archiveofourown.org/works/30251592 Full House (short/cockles) - reimagined version of the rented house story - putting it in order (so to speak). funny / cute / fluffy not explicit   Author: n_nami  https://archiveofourown.org/works/30855827

Cyber Sex (short/cockles) - anastiel https://archiveofourown.org/works/31467086      - shameless post GISH Fest zoom call porn      - Short (very short)

It's Complicated (cockles) - gail_morgan https://archiveofourown.org/works/31434938/chapters/77747519       The GISHtake (short/cockles) - MellyCrazyCoconut https://archiveofourown.org/works/31508099     - cute short post GISH zoom     - oops "babe, really?"  

(10.02.2021 updated) Since last update: New reads - Fuck i’m gonna be here all day - there’s not gonna be as much gonna be NO detail in these breakdowns...sorry! This has now just become a “what i’ve read list” as opposed to a Rec list...

Love, All Alike (Pt. 1 Love, All Alike) - Phantoms_and_Foxgloves   https://archiveofourown.org/works/4555599/chapters/10370646                             - Though The Stars Walk Backward (pt 2 Love, All alike) - Phantoms_and_Foxgloves

And this, your living kiss - opal_bullets   https://archiveofourown.org/works/18083927/chapters/42744872

Come On, Let's Strike a Match (Domination and Submission: a love story pt 1) - anyrei & queerwerewolf ***   https://archiveofourown.org/works/25722478/chapters/62458810    - Playing With Fire (D&S: a love story pt 2)    - We Kiss and the Flames Get Higher (D&S: a love story pt 3)     - Sparking That Old Flame (D&S: a love story pt 4) 

Cinderwings - bendingsignpost Cinderella!AU**   https://archiveofourown.org/works/12847041/chapters/29336421

Linden - fleeceframe Swan!AU**   https://archiveofourown.org/works/33126730/chapters/82236118

No Netflix, No Chill (short) - dorian_they   https://archiveofourown.org/works/28764966

Can't Drink You Away (short) - dorian_they   https://archiveofourown.org/works/28785792 

Jensen Totally (Does Not!) Snore (short RPF) - Dorian_they   https://archiveofourown.org/works/30315717

Dean Ships It (short) - dorian_they   https://archiveofourown.org/works/30349434

All about control - wingless   https://archiveofourown.org/works/9151930/chapters/20791243

Aesthetics in Autoerotica (pt 1 Aesthetics in Autoerotica) - relucant   https://archiveofourown.org/works/3885544                                                             - The Ties that Bind (pt 2 Aesthetics in Autoerotica) - relucant

Let's take a drive - sobsicles   https://archiveofourown.org/works/32581027/chapters/80819581 

Enchanted ink - castielslostwings TattooArtist!Dean TattooArtist!Castiel AU ***   https://archiveofourown.org/works/23043622/chapters/55109530

The bones beneath our skin - darknessbound   https://archiveofourown.org/works/24633754/chapters/59515804

The Plot (RPF) - Castiel_Left_His_Mark_On_Me   https://archiveofourown.org/works/2795588/chapters/6274970

The Gentle Force with which you Take Me (RPF) - Phoenix_Ascended   https://archiveofourown.org/works/32110120/chapters/79549183

According to all known laws of Life (Pt. 1 Cursed Metaphors) - sobsicles   https://archiveofourown.org/works/29207901                                                          - and he's back (with a mind of his own) (pt. 2 Cursed Metaphors) - sobsicles

Six hundred sundays (and many more) - sobsicles   https://archiveofourown.org/works/31158776

Aching in the Absence of you - sobsicles   https://archiveofourown.org/works/31832977/chapters/78811378

gorging myself on you, still can’t get full (insatiable) (Short) - sobsicles   https://archiveofourown.org/works/32203291

memories bring back memories (bring back you) - sobsicles   https://archiveofourown.org/works/24022945/chapters/57796885

Dream Come True (short) - bendingsignpost   https://archiveofourown.org/works/28071159

tall grass - aeli_kindara   https://archiveofourown.org/works/13127040/chapters/30030726

asunder (Short) - rageprufrock https://archiveofourown.org/works/62115

Apheresis - bendingsignpost BloodDonor!AU **   https://archiveofourown.org/works/32674783/chapters/81056680

we always were but never knew it - frightfullyrude   https://archiveofourown.org/works/32698324/chapters/81119503

In this Louisiana Bar (Short) - fleeceframe   https://archiveofourown.org/works/31764487

The Hitchhiker's Guide to Alternate Universes - n_nami   https://archiveofourown.org/works/32687929/chapters/81092785

my heart a compass - lagaudiere https://archiveofourown.org/works/28629951

Unsound Inverses - sp8ce (not complete)   https://archiveofourown.org/works/29836881/chapters/73413300

The Jensen Mistake (RPFish) - fellshish   https://archiveofourown.org/works/31950169

tell me about the dream (Pt. 1 Kids are coming home) - playedwright   https://archiveofourown.org/works/27984813/chapters/68544450

It's handy to know (FIMMF Themed ;)) - RosaMarloes   https://archiveofourown.org/works/31761322

So Says The Sword - komodobits AngelTrueform!AU**   https://archiveofourown.org/works/12597892/chapters/28695592

Communication Breakdown (RPFish)- darkshrimpemotions (jujubiest)   https://archiveofourown.org/works/29669601/chapters/72951339

Carry You Home - Casloveshisfreckles   https://archiveofourown.org/works/26982637/chapters/65862916

In the Shadow of your Wings - Enochian Things (Salr323)   https://archiveofourown.org/works/7531294/chapters/17121655

When Harry Met Sally (RPF) (Pt. 1 When Harry Met Sally ‘verse) - mnwood   https://archiveofourown.org/works/7622347/chapters/17351845    - Eight Dildos (RPF) (Pt. 2 When Harry Met Sally ‘verse) - mnwood    - Attention, Please (RPF) (Pt. 3 When Harry Met Sally ‘verse) - mnwood             - Boat Trip (RPF) (Pt. 4 When Harry Met Sally ‘verse) - mnwood

A Winter's Tale - NorthernSparrow   https://archiveofourown.org/works/2654327/chapters/5930561

A Close Shave - NorthernSparrow https://archiveofourown.org/works/3090167

r/supernatural - renrub (short) https://archiveofourown.org/works/27626783

sam reads destiel fics - rebshome (short - funny!)   https://archiveofourown.org/works/33721624

Angel Cookies - noxsoulmate Chirstmas!AU **  https://archiveofourown.org/works/11729640/chapters/26427765

Under The Midnight Sun - NorthernSparrow Arctic!AU **   https://archiveofourown.org/works/16690645/chapters/39143677

Bron-Yr-Aur - mrbluesky (Short) https://archiveofourown.org/works/28225335

The Dean Winchester Beat Sheet - saltyfeathers   https://archiveofourown.org/works/19258594/chapters/45800209

The Meaning On My Skin - saltnhalo   https://archiveofourown.org/works/18005378/chapters/42538133

Red Right Hand (Pt. 1 Murder Ballads)  - Duckyboos   https://archiveofourown.org/works/4306110/chapters/9760008    - Are you the One that I've been waiting for? (pt. 2 Murder Ballads) - Duckyboos   

Riptides - sharkfish   https://archiveofourown.org/works/13230426/chapters/30263556

Damn Fine Ride - Cimorene105 (pt 1 - rodeo) Cowboy!AU** (I’m a horse girl, sue me...)  https://archiveofourown.org/works/14342340    - My Face Just Does This, Sometimes - Cimorene105 (pt. 2 rodeo)    - The Kinkiest Thing I've Ever Done- Cimorene105 (pt 3 rodeo)    - All Signs Point to Love - Cimorene105 (pt. 4 rodeo)    - Monster Love - Cimorene105 (pt. 5 rodeo)    - My Man, The Siren - Cimorene105 (pt. 6 rodeo)    - A Pain in My Ass - Cimorene105 (pt. 7 rodeo)

Astrolabe (terra incognita pt 1) - reluctantabandon, Winter_of_our_Discontent   https://archiveofourown.org/works/3348812/chapters/7326794    - Drollery (terra incognita pt 2) - reluctantabandon Winter_of_our_Discontent    - Rubrication (terra incognita pt 3) - reluctantabandon Winter_of_our_Discontent

Go Down With This Ship - PorcupineGirl   https://archiveofourown.org/works/8023642/chapters/18370474

Fire and Ice - Castielslostwings (Firefighter/Paramedic AU!) **   https://archiveofourown.org/works/23286295/chapters/55768486

The Structural Similarities of Hunters and Onions - Faster_Than_the_Speed_of_Sound (Short)   https://archiveofourown.org/works/33383101

Castiel Novak's Office, This is Dean - emmbrancsxx0   https://archiveofourown.org/works/22411336/chapters/53545840

Out of the Deep (out of the deep pt. 1) - riseofthefallenone - MERMAID AU! **   https://archiveofourown.org/works/548878/chapters/977676

Dean (and Cas') Top 13 Zepp Traxx - pantheon_of_discord   https://archiveofourown.org/works/10909440/chapters/24256989

I'll Be Good - LittleAngelCassie   https://archiveofourown.org/works/4118334/chapters/9282234

Kenosis - CastielsCarma (Short - part of Destiel ABC collection)   https://archiveofourown.org/works/30411720

[occult-castiel]

The Same Page

This is my @destielsecretsanta2020 gift for @eclypseaf!!! The request was open, but bonus points for Miracle being present. So I wrote some post empty rescue fic!

This one honestly gave me a really hard time and I have no idea why. I hope you like it and have has an awesome christmas!

[Ao3 Link]

The portal spits them out in the dungeon.

Dean stumbles out first, a half step ahead of Cas. Human, malleable, and very much alive with one of the little dude's arms draped over Dean's shoulder.

Cas stumbles forward. Dean shoots an arm out in front of him, places a hand firmly against his chest. He maneuvers his other arms under his trenchcoat, grips his side firm.

His skins almost cool to the touch — much too cold to be safe. Not for a human, especially a brand new one.

And what if he's sick? Or gets sick and can't get better? Without his grace, there's a whole new set of worries. A bad flu that gets worse until he's gone, a hunt going wrong, fucking cancer. Heart disease kills pretty much everyone, doesn't it?

He takes a deep breath and focuses on the gentle thud of Cas' heart against his palm.

The last eight months haven't been easy. Not between the alcohol Sam eventually cut him off from, and the hunts getting sparse, and Jack being terrifying and gone until he wasn't.

Cas lulls his head to the side. His inky heart sticks to his forehead, and his blueberry-sweet eyes are unfocused but still manage to catch Dean's.

It's achingly familiar, and he smiles easy. "Hey there, sunshine."

Cas pinches his brows together as his head swims to stay upright. He slurs through some half-baked, nonsense question about coral reef bleaching, and Dean's so relieved he laughs.

Cas smiles at the sound, dazed and feather-light, but the joy is unmistakable.

It's the best thing Dean's ever seen. Fuck, he missed him. Missed him so much he didn't know what to do with himself.

Cas winces — what little help he was giving Dean in holding him up falls. He makes up the difference quick. Weak fingers curl around Dean's wrist.

"Sorry —"

"S'okay. Gonna —" he swallows hard. Tries to shove away the distinct pin-prick in his tear ducts that always means he needs to man the hell up. "Gonna get you to a bed, okay?"

Cas grunts, a pitiful noise that's mostly air and entirely feeble. "Tired."

"Rest then. It ain't far. I gotcha, buddy."

When he nods, his hair brushes Dean's neck.

It's not well thought out. The lack of work and overload of carbs haven't done Dean's muscles any favors. His joints creak and protest every step, but his room isn't far, and he'd be damned before he let's Cas feel like he has to do anything alone this time.

Miracle hops off the bed the moment the door opens.

Dean lays Cas on top of the bunched up blanket. Once he's down, Dean slowly works the trencoast and suit jacket off, his hands careful as they trail across the thin cotton of his shirt.

Cas shivers, and Dean wrestles to tug the blanket out from under him, Miracle nuzzling the side of his leg the whole time.

She's probably hungry. Or just wants attention. He hasn't exactly been available the last couple weeks, too busy with his nose in piles of research. But it all payed off.

Cas grimaces in his sleep, and it twists the cords in Dean's chest. He reaches his hand out and ghosts his fingers across the sweat-stained hair stuck to his skin, gently pushing it to the side.

He'd said it once, not more than a month ago, in the darkness of his room, Miracle tucked as close as he could get her.

He said he loved me, and I — I didn't say it back. But I do. God I do.

Dean trails his hand from his forehead to the flushed pillow of his cheeks. The other knuckles roughly at his eyes and comes back wet.

He has no god damn idea what he wouldve done without Miracle to talk to. Cause he could never get it out to Sam. Not those last moments. Not what Cas really means to him. Always too close to an edge of something larger than any apocalypse they've ever dealt with.

He traces down low enough to brush across Cas' wrist, the pained look still on his face.

Dean swallows, his heart hammers hard in his throat. Timid even though the guy is unconscious, Dean grabs his hand.

His mind blanks. Turns to complete static — a jumble of half-formed thoughts about every reason he ever told himself not to.

He's an angel. The worlds ending. Always ending. He doesn't feel that way. Can't, the equipment for it's not there. It's why he leaves, isn't it? And what the fuck could ever hope to start when it's all always falling apart? When they could fall apart.

Everyone leaves.

A flash of cold prickles down his back, and he tries to takes a deep breath. It goes down ragged. There was something he read once, about picking out a sense.

Cas' breath, slow and steady. The clink of Mircale's claws on the floor. A muted buzz from the florescent lights in the hall.

He breaths again, a little easier. His fingers curls into Cas' palm, and his finger twitch against Dean in response. The dent in his brows relax, his jaw goes slack.

"S'okay Cas." He squeezes. "Just... be okay."

When his phone rings, dumped and forgotten on the other side of the room, he isn't quite sure how to let go. Like the ligaments in his hand have cemented in place, forgotten the muscle memory to make the movements happen.

When the second call comes through, Cas mumbles something. Dean's shoulder slack, and he pulls his hands back, clammy and with a slight tremor.

It's Sam. There's a small tug of guilt — he should've called him the moment he put Cas down. He knows he would've been worried sick if Sam was the one that had to go.

Sam's relieved too, promises to buy stuff for dinner on his way back from where Dean went in the Empty about fifty miles out. And he must hear something in his voice, because he stresses to go watch a movie or something and let Cas sleep it off.

Of course he's right. They knew Cas would be out cold. But leaving the room is still hard, and he lingers in the doorway until he gets a good look at Miracle's mess of tangled fur.

He hasn't brushed her hair, since that's practically what the fur is, in weeks.

"C'mon girl."

He grabs the brush from the bedside table, casts on last look at Cas, and takes Miracle to the TV room.

She hops on the couch next to him, tail thumping with excitement.

"You wanna get pretty to meet Cas later?"

She nuzzles his hand, sticks her nose against the brush, and a little bit of the stress from today lightens up.

He flips on some netflix show about baking food, and talks to Miracle as he starts in on her snout.

It's ritualistic to touch on whatevers going on with her, at this point.

As her fur smooths, he tells her about the Empty. Its piss-poor lighting, the mind boggling way directions work, how it has this awful burnt-licorice and gasoline stench clung to the nothingness of its everything.

It kinda makes his head hurt.

Almost two full episodes in, he has all her fur neat and tidy, and his little monologue has circled back to Cas. She'd know a lot about him if she could talk.

"It's hard to believe he's really back. And — and maybe it'll be good. We could, I dunno, get you a yard?" He nods, smiles. "Yeah, I bet your spoiled ass would like that. The bunker ain't a place for pets."

Miracle leaps from the couch, and someone clears their throat from the door.

Cas stands in the doorway, hunched in on himself. Dark strands of hair twist up in random directions, and the casual clothes Dean left him fit snugly.

He looks... comfortable. Like he slipped into humanity ages ago, not this afternoon.

"Cas."

He tilts his lips up, tight and sheepish. "I see you have a dog now."

"Yeah. Miracle. She uh — she helped me." He motions vaguely to his head. "Might not be batting a hundred up here if not for her."

Cas glances down at her, and the tense smile softens. "I'm very grateful then."

Almost reverent, he scratches the side of her ear.

Dean shakes his head. Blinks. Two things he never thought he'd see side by side mixed with the insanity of the day make none of this seem real.

Deep breath.

"She can — she can be there for you too," Dean says. "If you need it. Dogs are great listeners. Even the Madonna types like this one."

Cas gives a contemplative hum. "They are both blonde."

He puffs a breath of air. It's easy to forget Cas actually knows what he's talking about now, sometimes. Even if he does still miss the point by a mile.

"It was your turn."

Cas raises an eyebrow.

"To, uh, pick a movie." He motions to the seat next to him. "If you want."

Cas runs his bottom lip between his teeth and doesn't look at Dean. Doesn't say anything either. Just nods, walks over, and sinks into the couch.

It's a respectable distance. Close enough Dean would be able to sense him, far enough away they won't touch.

Miracle curls up on the other side of Cas, head flopped on his lap, right next to his balled up hands.

"Is it over?" His voice is small.

Dean doesn't have to ask. "Chuck isn't aproblem anymore." Cas sighs, slinks down bonelessly into the cushions. "We figured it out, took his powers. Jack's fixing up Heaven with it. Says he's gunna do that, find a way to put Amara back together, and then come home."

"Good. I don't think I'm up to fighting standards." He rolls his head to the side. They're close enough Dean can make out each muscle in his neck when he swallows. "You didn't have to save me, Dean. I'd — made peace with that fate."

It's bullshit. It's bullshit and Cas has to know it. He almost tells him a much, but if he can't have that talk now, then he never will.

He licks his lips. It doesn't help the dryness.

"Did you mean it?"

It's a dumb question, but one he needs answered.

Cas doesn't miss a beat. "That and more." The serenity in his words is endearing as it is cutting when he adds, "But we don't have to address it. I don't want to make you uncomfortable."

It's Dean's turn to melt with relief. "Good — that's good."

Cas winces. "I understand if you'd like some space —"

He starts to stand up, and panic seizes Dean's chest like a vice grip. He grabs his wrist and Cas freezes.

"No! God no. Cas, it — it wasn't supposed to happen like that."

He looks confused, before some amount of understanding smoothes out some of the worried lines in his face. His eyes flick down to Dean's mouth for an instant. "How was it supposed to happen, then?"

"I thought, maybe on a hunt? Or — I don't know. Just... " some place I could say it back.

Its not good enough, saying it without saying it. Cas gave a speech. He saved Dean's life, saved the god damn world. All without knowing.

He shakes his head. Starts again. He had enough practice between thoughts he couldn't shove away and late night pet-therapy. "I thought you knew. Hell, I've been scared everyone knows. And if they did, you did too, right?"

"Subtly isn't always my strongest suit."

He laughs, and it's almost on the wrong side of sane. "Don't I know it."

He can do direct.

Slow enough that Cas has time to pull back, he runs his hand up his arm, cradles it against the back of Cas' neck. He leans across the small distance and kisses him.

It's clumsy and unsure, and Cas places a skittish hand on Dean's side like he's not sure what he's allowed to have even now, but their lips mesh together in a way that feels better than anything he can remember.

When they part, he's not sure either one of them are breathing. And he can't look at Cas, not when he says it. Not yet. So he presses their foreheads together, keeps his eyes fully lidded.

"I don't know how you could think you aren't worth saving. You — you're it for me."

"Dean —"

He shakes his head, and the tips of their noses brush. "I love you more than I know what to do with. You know that right?"

Bewildered, Cas says, "I didn't."

"Yean, well. Now you do."

He scoots back in place, flushed firm against the cushion. Their hands tangle together, and their knees are touching, and it's too much and not enough. But mostly not enough. Dean dares a glance over. Cas is staring at their hands, a pleased smile on his face.

And they're on the same page.

"I think you said something about a yard when I walked in?"

Instead of answering he says, "We should retire. I'm too old for this shit."

"Entirely?"

Dean shrugs. "A hunt here and there wouldn't hurt I guess."

"We'll talk about it later." He reaches over him, grabs the remote. "I think you said it was my turn?"

Dean grins, full and toothy. "Yeah, just no more romcoms, dude. I can only take so many."

Cas nods, curt and serious. "Of course."

He does anyway, and it's the best shitty movie Dean's ever seen.