#save me floor of philosophy story theme save me

[trainingdummyrabbit]

like. work isnt objectively That Bad all things considered. (my method of current employment.) however. if i routinely get stressed to the point of nausea and disassociation every time it happens i think that maybe might be a signifier for some sort of problem, maybe

[tokiro07]

Cipher Academy ch.54 thoughts

[Turnabout Academy]

(Contents: thematic analysis - Friendship: self-sacrifice/survivor's guilt/solidarity, creative choices - narrative utility)

You've done it again, Nisio, you're scaring the ever-loving out of me by making it look like your series has been canceled, and as usual, I can't tell if you're messing with me or not

On the basis that he's done this half a dozen times across this series and Medaka Box, I'm inclined to believe that Nisio is being very deliberate with skipping the latter 248 floors of the dungeon, even though it looks like he's rushing towards a conclusion due to low rankings. As the narration says, Iroha's trial on the courtroom floor was the climax to the roguelite section of the story, as it was the culmination of the themes of self-sacrifice and survivor's guilt

Karigane tried to push everyone else away so she would be the only one in any danger, Oboro sacrificed herself so that Iroha and Kasuri could continue on without losing any time, Namasu was determined to solve the collapsing room puzzle even if she was alone, and Omomuro allowed herself to experience death multiple times just so she could pass any information she learned onto Toshusai. Just about everyone that Iroha interacted with in this arc was in some way sacrificing themselves for the sake of someone else, something that doubtlessly resonated with Iroha

Iroha's goal has been complete victory through unification and solidarity, but everyone else keeps trying to pick themselves off. This is exactly what he's been wrestling with ever since the overseas trip gone wrong; all of his friends sacrificed themselves for him, and now he's watching it all happen again. Oboro likely hit him the hardest, since that was the only one that was explicitly for his sake, but he surely recognized that it was happening all around him as well

The problem isn't really the sacrifices, though, it's the lack of cohesion. His team didn't just sacrifice themselves for him, they elected him as the only one to survive without considering what he wanted. Without considering the effects that would have on him going forward. Iroha didn't just watch his friends die, he was left alone. Abandoned, in a sense. Sure, he was saved, but his salvation came with the profound anguish of isolation - did he achieve salvation through damnation, or damnation through salvation? What's the point in surviving if you're going to feel guilty about it?

Kasuri's dilemma of whether to use the pledge wasn't a matter of self-sacrifice, but a matter of solidarity. Sure, it's proof that everyone has decided to stand by Iroha no matter what, but that's everyone else rallying behind him rather than actually being with him. That may seem like silly semantics, but it's a very Nisio Isin philosophy. Iroha's desire here is to face his survivor's guilt; to make amends to the people who were sacrificed for his sake, to feel what they felt and get his just desserts for leaving them behind. If everyone bailed him out here by saying they don't care that he left people to die, that'd be like saying they don't care how he feels about it. That his guilt is invalid, that he should just get over it

But even if the court found in his favor there, the weight would never be lifted. Iroha would never feel like he's been forgiven, just that his opinion has been swept under the rug and that no one understands what he's feeling

This is why Kasuri's final decision to accept the verdict with Iroha is what ultimately saved him: it's not that Kasuri was willing to sacrifice herself, it's that she was willing to stay. She didn't cut and run by fighting on after his death, nor did she ask him to cut and run by offering to die in his place, but instead declared for all to hear that she would stay by his side regardless of the outcome. If victory through sacrifice is meaningless, then defeat through solidarity must be meaningful

And meaningful it was, as it not only moved Dekiai's heart, but lifted the weight from Iroha's. It is important to note that Dekiai did not find Iroha not guilty, but instead, she suspended his sentence - in other words, she did not tell him that he was innocent and invalidate his feelings of guilt, but left it up to him to live in a way that would make him feel like his friends' sacrifices weren't in vain. With friends like Kasuri vowing to stay by his side, though, I think there's a good chance that he understands the value that his continued life holds, at least on some level

So with that character arc complete, what would have been the point of going through the other 248 floors from a narrative perspective? The final challenge was clearly always meant to be this 13-way battle, so no one else was going to be eliminated on the way here, and any further one-on-one interactions we could get were probably being saved for this battle anyway. Nisio skipped tons of floors on the way to 250, so it's not like he ever implied he was planning on showing all 500 floors in the first place. The virtual Cipher Academy was always meant to be set-dressing, a means for the cast to have these interactions, so asking to see more of it is kind of like missing the trees for the forest. Sure, the dungeon sounded cool and unique, and I wish it had been a bit more visually interesting in and of itself, but what we got was a compelling, character-driven narrative rather than one that was mired in world-building for its own sake, and in my opinion that's one of Nisio Isin's strengths as a writer

Iroha's trial was the conclusion of this section of his character arc, how his feelings of guilt isolate him emotionally from the people who care about him. The completion of that character arc is what proves he's ready for the final battle of the current story arc, so putting off that conclusion for the sake of showing off the ideas Nisio came up with for the different floors would just be needless stalling that could only serve to dampen the emotions we feel from this character-based conclusion. I'm willing to bet that the game that's to be played next chapter will somehow be informed by the lessons that Iroha has learned here, so separating the two events would likely be counter-intuitive

Or I'm wrong and Cipher Acadmey's been canceled and Nisio just wants to get through this arc at least. Time will tell, but until we're explicitly told that it's over, I'm confident that this is Nisio being Nisio

Until next time

[strangecloud]

Here's a fun thing about the Fallout series.

It used to be my favorite media-anything. OG Fallout was so open and intimidating, it felt like a real adventure. Specifically, the game asking you to try and find a specific object and trusting you to rely on your wits while also counting down the days until you eventually get it, and all the twists and turns that can happen in between, made it very real and the stakes very high despite the fact that you can save-scum everything. There's a real danger of bricking a run just because you weren't good enough, or paying enough attention.

That's the core philosophy behind the series, I think. Fallout is laser-focused on asking you, the player, to imagine a character, think about what makes them strong and their weaknesses, and control this one character, singular, down to the very words they speak. I think that's why I and a lot of people project a lot of escapism into the franchise. It's a comfort game, despite the horrible and terrifying subject matter, because you can be whoever you want.

Okay, so. The Bethesda Problem. In theory, Bethesda has kept this fantasy mostly intact. The difference is, they have replaced character expression, you know, saying the things you want to say and building your character how you want, with ludic expression. You don't think about what you'd like your character to do, you think about what you want to do and then you do it.

And this also appeals to me. As I've gotten older, I want less escapism and more of a relaxing way to unwind with my video games. It has changed my opinions on a lot of games I'd dismissed before. It's my genuine, honest opinion that Fallout 4 is still the best looter-shooter that people compulsively sleep on because of some presumption that it's not good for whatever reason. My brother in christ, it was made by Bethesda. Those guys have their weaknesses but if there's one thing they know how to do is make a cool world to do pointless things in, and make it fun.

That being said. While I've had a lot of fun with FO4, and I mean a lot, when I first got it I was floored at how compelling it was to play. Still, the main story is real bad. It might be the worst narrative writing thing ever put in a video game.

Now, I'm sure you can think of bad, offensive stories in games. I'm not talking about the quality of the writing here, although it is very bad. The reason I think it's the very, bottom of the barrel Worst Story is because it makes me not want to play the game.

For contrast, Borderlands 3 is a game that has dangerous concentrations of obnoxious dialogue, pointless character deaths, forgettable villains and poor pacing. The story on that game is Bad. However, I can tolerate it. I can choose to not take it seriously.

Fallout 4 doesn't give me a choice. It wants me to care, it wants me to pick characters I like, and to pick factions to support, and to choose what happens and how I respond to it, and I just don't care. I'd rather the game stop badgering me to pay attention to the worthless story and just give me more things to shoot.

All that to say, Fallout has evolved along with my tastes in a direction I don't entirely dislike. I'm perfectly happy to sip on memberberry juice stomping around a Fallout theme park world, pointing at Nuka-Cola logos and Super Mutants and whatever else doesn't really make sense anymore in the setting, that's fine. It's why I don't have much of a problem with Fallout 76. Because that's just what it is now, there's no opportunity cost for a better Fallout we never got because if it wasn't for Bethesda, there wouldn't be Fallout.

Some people may mourn the more cerebral RPGs of the past, but this franchise continues to bring joy to countless people. Ironically enough, its branding is its own worst enemy. I don't enjoy it as much as I used to, but it's still fun.

It's like a hometown. It changes over time, but you can always go back to reminisce, and at some point you need to find somewhere else to settle down.

[inhonoredglory]

another character based question - how do you feel about mikasa? a lot of fans dont like her, im curious about how you feel! - armin anon

Hellooooo Armin Anon. OMG it’s been forever since I had the time to sit down and do a proper meta, and I apologize.

First off, I finished the manga!!! (So, spoilers ahead for anyone else reading this.) I had to lie down after reading 139. It’s a tremendous story and I’m still taking it all in. The set pieces and personal/emotional stakes of everything that happens is just astounding. If it’s one thing Isayama does good, it’s the gut-wrenching personal anguish that underlies the action. I’m absolutely floored. My favorite bit was probably the timey-wimey stuff in Paths and Eren. That blew my freaking mind. But onto Mikasa!!

A Cruel Yet Beautiful World

I remember way back when I started the anime that I started liking Mikasa first out of the group. I liked how sullenly silent and no-nonsense she was, and I liked her loyalty to Eren. Her emotion, especially when Eren died in Trost, was palpable and terrifyingly beautiful. Her grief was incredibly realistic––rushing off with a death wish that even she couldn’t succumb to in the end, because of the drive to fight that she got from Eren. In a world like SNK, her relentlessness breaking through her grief was incredibly moving. And her philosophy is basically the driving theme of SNK: “This is a cruel world, and yet so beautiful.”

This is the same moral message she gives Eren when he can’t find the strength in him to fight Annie––and gives him that warm, understanding, inscrutable smile that allows him to finally accept his own monsters, fight Annie, and save her and Armin. (One of my favorite panels of her from the manga, actually.) Mikasa is basically the first character we meet who embodies this contradictory morality, which grows to engulf SNK and other characters as well (Levi, Reiner, and Armin especially come to mind). Which could be why I was drawn to her at the start, since the complex moral outlook of SNK was the primary reason I fell hard for this story.

(And gosh, it’s tragic to realize that it’s teaching moments like the scene above that made Eren into the person who could influence his own child self to murder, the person who could wipe out so much of humanity, the person who could take Ymir’s challenge to free her by destroying the love of the person who cared the most about him. I’m still processing yo.)

Acker-parallels

I started really analyzing Mikasa when I had to defend her from a friend of mine who accused her of resenting Levi (for beating up Eren) and that’s why she attacked him so violently in the RTS serumbowl. Because of my research into rebutting that, a lot of my affection for Mikasa now comes in seeing the little ways in which she cares and trusts other people, including Armin, Levi, Gabi, and Jean. And her quiet sensibility that goes beyond her love and protectiveness of Eren.

With Levi in particular, I find a lot I like about her. Because you can definitely see her annoyance at him, but she also trusts him more than anyone else in the Corps outside of Armin. After Levi’s violent encounter with Historia, she was the only one who implicitly trusted Levi’s judgement, backing up Armin’s more reasoned logic. She sees beyond her own emotions and even moral feelings and realizes the world is cruel enough that sometimes people have to do dark things to help others and survive.

This is very much the same statement Levi made to the 104th when he had asked them to follow Erwin’s orders when the commander’s plans were questionable on the surface: “Do you trust him? Those dumb enough to say yes… come with me.” These two understand each other on a moral level, and they ask for their comrades’ loyalty without demanding it, because they each know that everyone’s conscience is their own.

There’s a clear parallel between Mikasa and Levi, not only because of their Ackerman heritage and sensibilities (loyal to a fault to their chosen person, impossibly strong, quiet and grim), but their frustration when they cannot protect the people they are responsible for. They both know they are the strongest around, and if they cannot fulfill on that power, a lot of people will die.

There are many moments in which Mikasa puts aside her personal feelings to do her soldierly duty, from leaving Eren to help with the evacuation of Trost to leaving Eren and Armin to fight the Colossal Titan alone in Shigonshina.

And then there’s the fact that Levi’s the one who could break past Mikasa’s headspace and distraction so that she can do the right thing. He understands her strong emotion, he respects it, but he also knows when that has to be put aside for the greater good. But he doesn’t put her down for having those emotions, either.

Strength from Eren, Humanity from Armin

Mikasa’s love and loyalty to Eren challenges her tremendously after the timeskip and her sorrow at Eren’s change is what really stands out to me about her character in the Marley arc. The absolute grief in her eyes when she tells Eren what he’s done is devastating, and it shows just how much goodness and compassion she does have.

And yet she longs to understand Eren, to trust him, to believe there can be something redeeming, and not merely jaded and tired, in what he taught her so many years ago––to fight, to win, to live.

There’s such a difference between these same words said here by Mikasa, so many years later, after so much heartbreak, to the anger and flame that were in them when she first heard them, back when she realized that this was the way of the world. That death and killing happens in the natural world everyday and that’s how you survive. That the world is both cruel and beautiful.

And yet as the years wore on, as Mikasa grew closer to others, found purpose in protecting others, sought a life with Eren… as she wandered further into the forest of life and society and relationships, she lost some of that simple injunction... to live is to fight, to fight is to win. She, like so many of the 104th and the others on this journey, found that it’s not enough to just fight and live and be satisfied. We really want it all to mean something, to have our actions be redemptive. To allow ourselves to believe that we do what we’re doing because we’re not just saving ourselves, but saving others, “saving the world” like Yelena points out (in the forest therapy session pfff). And it’s that drive for something bigger in our actions that grieves her so much with Eren, because as she wants her own actions to be fundamentally good and selfless, she wants his actions to be moral as well.

So while Eren is the person that frustrates Mikasa and motivates her to become stronger and braver than she ever was, Armin is the person who humanizes Mikasa and allows her the space to be gentle and vulnerable. She comforts Armin, confides in him, puts her faith in him, and puts her life in his hands.

She trusts Armin with Eren, and she values Armin’s intellect and compassion, qualities she doesn’t have in nearly as much quantities as he does: “There are only so many lives I can value. And… I decided who those people were six years ago. So... you shouldn’t try to ask for my pity. Because right now, I don’t have time to spare or room in my heart.”

This bit from her confrontation with Ymir and Historia was a defining moment for me with Mikasa. It’s honest and realistic in a way that few of us care to admit about ourselves, and it’s just super chilling and badass coming from her, too. It also shows how much she fights for Armin and Eren both. They are the two people she loves the most in the world, and she never gave up on saving either of them––from death or from themselves.

I’m looking back on Trost now and finding so much irony with the ending to SNK. In Trost, she was the one to give up on Eren, telling Armin that it was hopeless to try to extract Eren’s personality from his Titan form. And yet, like in the end, it’s always been between Armin and Mikasa to try to salvage Eren’s humanity. In Trost, Armin tells Mikasa to leave––to go do what she’s good at (saving lives)––and to entrust Eren to him.

It’s a huge expression of both Mikasa’s trust in Armin, and her belief in Armin’s abilities and friendship for Eren. And in the end, it’s the two of them again debating on if there’s any humanity left in Eren. The bond they share is intimate and deep. With all the military doubting Eren and scheming to take away his Titan (with even Jean and Connie unavailable to them emotionally), it’s only Armin and Mikasa against the world––the only two people who can truly consider Eren’s actions and hold off on judging him. And you can feel their love for him even as they doubt him.

And like back then, it has always been Armin who understands Eren most, the one who recognizes his own evil and Eren’s and finds a redemption in having others stop you, because you cannot stop yourself.

And that’s the thing I really take away from SNK and from Mikasa’s journey, that we all have devils inside us, and yet there is still beauty to be found, within us and in the world––from the natural wonders that Armin dreams of, to the comfort of purpose and companionship that Mikasa has in Eren. Love and wonder is what redeems us of our devils. And yet love itself is complicated, and can turn ugly in its obsession. That giving up that love is what makes the love selfless and beautiful, what absolves us of the selfishness within us. That’s what Mikasa learned. And in the end, she was able to release that love for the good of the world.

So I guess to sum up, I really love Mikasa. I can see why her dogged loyalty to Eren might annoy some fans, but I think there’s a lot more to her than simply that, and in fact, her journey and growth is heart-rending and one of the most symbolic arcs of SNK and fundamental to its entire theme. She’s a badass with a lot of emotion and depth behind her cold mask.

[keyofjetwolf]

We’re All Just Guys

Well it took the entire fucking season, but I FINALLY get the purpose for Henry Fondle: Sex Robot. And while the entire episode (and season, honestly) has been tremendous, that this ridiculous fucking punchline was the vehicle to deliver the overarching point with a solid knockout punch of meaning AND pathos? Absolutely floored. That BoJack Horseman can be (and often is) brilliant isn’t a surprise, but the ways is keeps proving it often are.

So “The Stopped Show”, a tale of accountability and responsibility and how we’re all just guys.

Each of our main characters closes out this season alone (sort of), in assorted stages of realizing the main themes, or completely failing to. I find Diane’s arc the hardest for me to make a decision on, which isn’t surprising, as I think in many ways, Diane’s the most complicated character in the show. She delivers, directly and succinctly, one of the major points of not just this season but the entire show, but how does it relate to her? I’M NOT COMPLETELY SURE. I think part of the problem with (and for) Diane is that she knows better. She’s the most insightful character, she has a fantastic head on her shoulders, but only for everyone else. She’s this fucked up little disaster prophet, her vision clear and her message concise, unable to ever apply her gifts to fix herself.

Diane is just as trapped as BoJack, but in a fun twist, is now lagging behind him in trying to do something about it. Nearly every single scene with Diane this season has been in this sad little room of her sad little apartment with all her sad little unpacked boxes, and no matter how much truth and wisdom she spits out, HERE SHE STILL IS, failing to correctly assemble IKEA furniture with names like Bȧcksleid. She already feels like shit for sleeping with Mr. Peanutbutter, so what does she do? THE SAME FUCKING THING. To which I groan and roll my eyes, while simultaneously being proud of her for directly and immediately setting him straight about not getting back together. Diane rides this constant line where she gets it but also doesn’t, which is so interesting to me in the level of additional frustration this makes me feel. BoJack is so self-absorbed you don’t really expect any better of him, which has the flip side of your expectations being so low that even the whiff of progress feels exceptional. Diane doesn’t come with any of that though, she knows better, you KNOW she knows better, and the consequence of this for the audience is that she winds up being more unlikeable than the guy who literally last episode nearly strangled his girlfriend and co-star in the middle of a paranoid drug-induced frenzy.

Which is fucked up! It’s intensely fucked up! And also, I think, the point! We expect more of Diane, and so feel more disappointed when she doesn’t deliver. Is that fair of us?

But there’s more here, as we pivot to the accountability portion of this episode/season. From the beginning of the show, it’s been incredibly upfront about how everything is unfair. We come back to this time and again. Privilege rules the day in the world of Hollywoo. Fame, money, charisma, gender, power. BoJack has been an asshole from pretty much the moment he set foot in the spotlight (possibly before?), and the only thing ever even attempting to hold him back has been the moments his guilt manages to scream loud enough to be heard over his internal narrative. Whatever he does, however he fucks up, he always stumbles back to his feet, and NEVER with any (broad scale) consequences. Meanwhile, here’s Diane, in her sad shitty apartment. Consequences haunt Diane, even if she’s the one doing the haunting. The crap things she’s done and the shitty choices she’s made cling to her.

There’s no fairness in that either, no justice. But Hollywoo (and the entire world around it) (and our world too oh yes) has that privilege carved into its bones, and Diane bears none of its marks. Her situation is very different from but parallel to Gina, who is just so fucked over, it keeps legitimately making me angry for her.

Gina, of course, brought none of this on herself. She made the mistake of caring about BoJack and trying to help him. OOPS YOU WERE A GENEROUS PERSON WITH AN OPEN HEART FUCK YOU LADY. For her trouble, Gina has been assaulted and traumatized, AND she is in very real danger of her career being over when it’s only just finally beginning. And she KNOWS THIS. That’s the part that I keep coming back to. All this should be an aberration, an anomaly, and while that may be true of the specifics, conceptually, it’s so commonplace that Gina already knows how it’s going to play. She’ll stop being Gina and become The Woman Nearly Strangled To Death By BoJack Horseman. Even if she’s able to keep working, this is what she’ll be asked about in every interview forever. Even if she convinced people to genuinely listen to her, BoJack would, at worst, get a slap on the wrist as he stumbles back to his feet. We know that, WE ALL KNOW THAT, because it happens all. the. fucking. time. Gina did nothing wrong, but this would still define her for the rest of her life, while for BoJack, it would maybe become a footnote on his Wikipedia page.

Nothing about that is FAIR. Nothing about it is JUST. Gina’s choices shouldn’t have to be “this becomes my entire life” or “swallow this down and pretend it never happened”. But it is, as it has been in perpetuity for the victims of the privileged.

So then what can we do about it? Well that’s really the question, isn’t it? This episode answers it in an assortment of ways (I think the entire SHOW is very much about this, really, but this episode is for sure coming with guns blazing), while also showing us why none of those answers can work. It’s funny and sad and awful and true, but also, ultimately, the most hopeful answer because it’s the only one you can actually affect: It’s you. It’s me. It’s each and every one of us, individually, making a choice to be better.

And believe it or not, we embody this with Henry Fondle: Sex Robot.

I thought the whole thing was so unbelievably stupid. Half the season, we’ve had this goddamn multi-dildo’d juvenile frat boy joke running around with its stupid ass Speak-and-Say voice, doing the same shtick over and over, and I’m like, “okay this is just the shit I have to put up with to get the clever stuff, I guess.” BUT THAT’S EXACTLY THE POINT I’M SITTING THERE LIVING THE ENTIRE GODDAMN POINT AND MISSING IT. Henry Fondle: Sex Robot is seventeen shades of overt horribleness, AND WE ALL JUST GIVE IT A PASS. It’s just the way it is, the way the world works, the price of doing business. When the whole time -- THE ENTIRE FUCKING TIME -- all it took was one person to say no. One person who could see the game we all are playing and was willing to give up everything to stop it.

Hilariously, Henry Fondle IS a metaphor, sort of, but of the saddest kind. He is literally a robot, he can’t possibly change. What’s more, media fervor will never affect him, fallout will never touch him, and the powerful will always rally around themselves to retain their power. It takes Todd, the head of the company, the creator of Henry Fondle, and the one person who would benefit most from the unending efforts of the rest of the world bending over backwards to avoid the truth, to put a stop to it. In doing so, he immediately returns to his old, homeless, destitute self, but doesn’t once hesitate or look back.

It’s Todd, and only Todd, that stops that madness, because while individual people are a problem, the world at large is too. Stefani makes a great point that Diane holds herself and everyone else to impossible standards and a little forgiveness and grace wouldn’t go amiss, but when Diane suggests they apply that philosophy to their clickbait gossipy shit on their website, it’s just

Which again, is beautifully cynical and depressing, but not untrue. Fostering a more forgiving culture isn’t in stopping websites from posting clickbaity takedown articles, it’s each person deciding not to take the clickbait. We can absolutely have a conversation about the people creating their world or the world creating its people, but when you boil it down, only one of those things can you yourself absolutely and directly change, and it’s not the entire world.

A THING DIANE GETS BUT SIMULTANEOUSLY ABSOLUTELY DOES NOT.

I can’t take myself away from this Diane thing, I know, but only because she’s the fucking CORE of each and every one of us struggling with this idea. She’s the simplicity of it and the complication all in one. Not BoJack, which is NOT where I thought we’d be when we started this journey. BoJack is more an action on the people around him at this point in the story, he IS the world you cannot change. He’s pointed to rehab, and off he goes -- or doesn’t! I don’t think it’s coincidence that we stay with Diane and watch her watching him.

Oh, Diane, indeed. As she tells her story of her friend Abby, who threw her over for the cool kids, who turned every confidence into a scar. Who Diane still helped anyway, because Abby needed her. Did Abby learn from that, did she get better? We don’t know; we stay with Diane and watch her watching Abby. Diane, who can so completely understand about personal responsibility while failing to recognize her own enabling for the shitty things that keep happening to her.

You can control yourself. That’s it. That’s the only playground with a guarantee.

Will BoJack go off to learn that? Will Diane stay and figure it out?

THAT’S WHAT NEXT SEASON IS FOR

Something I was toying with including in this, but ultimately decided against for a variety of reasons, was the contrast between BoJack’s take on personal responsibility independent of external response, and The Good Place’s argument that people need external support for personal growth. An idea I may not have even considered contrasting save that Doc’s talked before about these two Jewish creators with what are clearly very different philosophies, and basically, if she were ever able to manage a discussion between them on this, I’d love to be in the room. I’ll be very quiet and not get in the way, I promise.

[classysmashy]

Into Each Life...

#3/??? of Nuclear Winter

ZoNa Holiday 2020 Entry Prompt 3 (Ornaments / Tradition)

@zonamievents

One Piece in Fallout Universe (kinda~)  [I do not own One Piece or Fallout]

AN: There was something in particular I wanted to convey about Nami with this one, but after this there will definitely be more Zoro. So, I have ideas of how to explain the devil fruits, fishmen/mermaids, and sky natives into the Fallout universe for this and it’s pretty exciting. I don’t know when I might try to get into moments to explaining them out, but I might do future chapters (after the holiday event is over) to do flashbacks that put key moments into this universe since this is supposed to take place six years after Luffy originally started his journey. If I do these, I might build up a wayyy longer chapter for those moments to try and keep them from taking away from the main story being focused later in the timeline compared to the past. Again, sorry for this being late, I had my ideas for these, but it was a matter of putting everything into the words I wanted. The original Fallout 1 and 2 games had much darker themes than the newer ones and I want to try and incorporate that, but not too heavy outright.<3

Rated: T for Blood, Heavy Violence, Suggestive Themes

Word Count: 4,379

*****

Ever since she was younger, Nami understood that bad things must happen for the good times to come rolling in. That was the second lesson she had learned from the death of Bellemere. The first lesson had been that she had to keep living, for being alive meant something, even when you don’t necessarily know just what that something is.

A part of her wanted to rip the world to shreds for the death of Bellemere and believed Arlong deserved the most cruelest, torturing death for the crimes he had committed to her hometown. And for so long Nami lived with that spite building inside of her, brimming over the top at times and causing her to lash out upon herself.

The first time she went wild with her anger, it happened while she had been visiting Nojiko and storing away some of the money she had stolen. Nami had lost it in a fit of rage, putting her fist through a flower vase, the broken ceramic cutting at the skin of her hand, and smashed up the kitchen table with one of the dinning chairs.

It was during those times that Nojiko started making sure Nami was voicing herself to the older sister, since bottling those feelings away inside was destroying Nami each time she felt helpless. 

Nami never cried though. She would get angry, break things, lie about being happy, but she would never let the full extent of the misery hiding inside to be released out for anyone to see. 

This had went on through the years, her deceiving charms becoming her main weapon to steal from unsuspecting raiders —after she had gotten used to their behavior and could trick them to not shoot at her. Eventually, the most normal occurrence seemed to be stumbling on the newer recruits of the raiders to swindle, stealing their money and valuables to sell.

Those years of experiences is what had paid off when she met Luffy that very first time in Orange Town, the idiot so unaware of what people could do to those who were too naïve. Nami used him like a puppet to gather up Buggy’s recent escapade of cash and stash, but had felt horrible when it seemed the guy was going to be killed, and that was another first time for her. Quickly, her fingers had already reached out to stop the refashioned canon from shooting at Luffy locked up in a cage. 

He seemed to make his mind up about Nami in that moment as well as the rest of Buggy’s men who were racing onto her form, ready to slash and make her one with the wasteland. 

Yet, that death never came back then. 

And that was how Nami met Zoro the first time, her back to him, clutching onto a lit string, and him with all of his swords out to stop the fighters in their tracks. 

That one moment in time seemed to set off a chain reaction. Zoro was constantly the one saving Nami from danger during their travels together, always seeming to run his lost feet right to where she was in need of help.

Robin passed on a comment to her about the action when he still seemed to find himself saving her randomly after all of them reunited. “If Zoro has no sense of direction, possibly it means his internal compass is set wrong. And I believe that internal compass is set to find you when you’re in danger, hm? It’s only a small theory, but one that holds merit with the actions he has presented.” The small chuckle Robin had hid after walking away from Nami and leaving the girl with just that, still echoed her mind.

All along through the years of being with the Strawhats, there did seem to be something odd about how often Nami and Zoro seemed to be thrown together when the two had clearly been offsets to one another, ideologies varying drastically and causing constant arguments between the two. The fighting between them had begun to die down some when they all came back together after two years. 

Whether it was because of herself or Zoro, she had never picked up on. The swordsman didn’t even seem to end up around her much at first, but when they were together he had seemed so... calm. Zoro had a different air around him, everyone did, and the way Zoro seemed to change had put him at ease about what his true mission was now with being a part of the crew. 

Protector. Zoro decided during the time apart that he was and had to be the one who was the full protector of the crew, of Luffy’s dream, and carry the burden of keeping everyone alive. The idiot became ready to throw his life down just to keep the others safe.

Nami had been pissed off by it.

A protector in her mind would never let themselves die so easily, never give up on their own dream like that, wouldn’t throw everything away in a blink of an eye.

But, that was exactly what Bellemere had done for her and Nojiko.

When she realized how much Zoro was becoming like Bellemere in that sense, she avoided him and kept distance between the two. Frightened. She had been frightened imagining the crew going through a death like that, Zoro’s death. And it was the pain she imaged Luffy had felt after their initial break apart when Ace died.

Losing Zoro would be hard, as a close friend and even worse on the dynamics of all the Strawhats. It was her realization of this that had brought on their first fight since everyone got back together.

During one of his nightly workouts while on watch, Nami had stormed Zoro and began questioning him about if he planned to roll over and die. 

To say the least, he was stunned at Nami for it, and he lashed back with his own yelling. Damn if it woke anyone up on the ship, the woman was talking mad.

Zoro would yell about how it was impossible for him to die so soon and he wasn’t giving up on his life that easily and Nami would yell back with how he had changed his philosophy, that she wondered if he truly wanted to be the greatest swordsman throughout the wasteland still. The moment she had brought his dream into question, he cuffed her wrists above her head and pushed her body up the wall, leaving her feet dangling off the floor. 

 Before, she had been frightened about his death, but this was the first time she was actually scared of Zoro’s actions. Her breathe had been caught in her throat and leaving her speechless as Zoro closed in around her, caging Nami upon the wall with a deadly look in his eye. The look that most experienced just moments away from him bringing great pain into the life of his enemies.

“I don’t question you about your dream, why question me about mine? You don’t know a damn thing about me right now through that clouded gaze of yours. Die? I’m not planning to go anywhere, so get used to it, witch.”

If anyone were to ask her about it, Nami would deny the fact that there had been a small heat that swallowed her insides when Zoro hung her out to dry then.

He seemed to gather some wits about the predicament he had placed both of them into, releasing Nami to stand back on her feet and turning away again to his weights. 

Zoro had promptly ignored her for the rest of the night, even as she burnt holes into his back until the wee hours of the morning.

*****

Winter was always harsh back home, even before Bellemere had been murdered. The income for the family would dry up as the mikan trees couldn’t bear fruit during the cold season and had to be watched over carefully. That also meant the family dinners would be kept small and that Christmas presents for little Nami and Nojiko would be drastically different compared to the kids of the rest of the villagers living in the town.

Nami was always rougher during winter, making a comment every single day about how Bellemere had to be upset about raising them and them eating up all of her money and time. Bellemere simply ignored it though, until spring would finally break the clouds above and Nami would drop the subject of money from her mind.

She couldn’t be upset about the traditions that Nami held for winter, just as Nojiko became more clingy and stuck to Bellemere’s side when winter rolled around. 

There were many traditions that the little family held together with their heartstrings on the line. Like how Nami and Nojiko would bake a tiny cake that would cut into four adequate pieces, how Bellemere would bake up the pretty ham Genzo brought over, how the four of them gathered together in a pray that Genzo asked of them to do around the food before eating. 

Four people just enjoying being together for another year, smiling and laughing for the whole day without any issues. Christmas was the one day that fighting wasn’t allowed, the day was to be sweet and jovial with nothing weighing down on the bright mood. 

But, the good times had came to an end after Arlong showed up.

Many people throughout Cocoyashi had stopped celebrating any holiday all together, in favor of saving up that bit of extra money to pay for their keep the next time Arlong’s goonies came to collect. Genzo would rest a slice of ham and pour a bottle of booze over Bellemere’s grave. Nojiko would spend time out with the mikan trees and would take the very last one of the year to Bellemere’s grave, returning on Christmas day and talking with her through the night about Nami. 

And Nami would stay away from home until only a few days were left of the year. There was a guilt that Nami carried for giving herself up to Arlong that she couldn’t shake off and she never wanted to disrupt a nice day for Bellemere, so she waited for the holiday to pass before making her own visit with a bouquet of flowers.

Each time she wanted to cry out, bawl until the ground became so wet it would sink beneath her and swallow her whole with the grass and mud and dirt, bringing Nami to be one with Bellemere’s body beneath. 

But she wouldn’t let those tears fall down, she would recap the bottle on her heart even tighter and chug down bottles of whiskey and vodka until her throat burned too much and passed out. Maybe, it was because of Christmas that Nami had developed her tolerance over time, each year drinking more and more and  pushing out how long it would take to reach the tipping point.

Things became different around Christmas after joining up with Luffy and Zoro in Orange Town.

As the crew built up more and more, the holiday came around just before they had reached Sabaody Archipelago the first time, and they had stopped for a few days to celebrate together.

It was a weird time for all of them. The only ones who was close to having a proper Christmas in the past years was Chopper and Franky, Chopper because of him living in the cold climate that was constantly set in Christmassy time and Franky because of how his “family” would booze it up and gamble money off together on the holiday.

Nami knew that Robin hadn’t celebrated the holiday in her life nor had Zoro either, Sanji didn’t count into having celebrated since the Baratie only had special Christmas dinners for customers and not actually anything for themselves. Usopp didn’t get to celebrate as a kid with his mom sick and nobody wanted him around during their Christmas dinner because of his lies, which would leave him all alone. Luffy had actually never told them if he had celebrated before and Brook was so old that he forgotten about the last time he had a Christmas, so it was a restart for him.

The whole thing went well though, super in fact, as Franky liked to put it. 

 Sanji cooked a feast after him, Zoro, and Luffy had a hunting contest. Franky couldn’t find any lights, but cut a tree down for them to settle around. Nami, Robin, and Chopper would work on cutting up fabric to hang around the place they were hunkered in to make the scene just a bit more festive. Usopp had been the one to tell all the jokes and stories that gave everyone hearty laughs and looks of disbelief as they ate and drank. Brook would be playing Christmas tunes on his violin through the nights, whisking them to sleep with the beautiful melodies.

That was their first time celebrating Christmas all together and after being apart two years, when Christmas rolled back around, they did it again. This time more people were celebrating with them, Jinbe, Law, people that Luffy had dragged into his life deciding that from this time onward, they were his friends whether they liked it or not.

Those traditions built of being together as a family of friends were beautiful and she would look forward to when the time would come and she would be able to get actual gifts together for all of them.

*****

A cool, wetness dragged across the skin of her cheek, the dishrag scratching at the blood splatters covering her face. Another one was wiping away at the blood all over her hands, gently tugging between fingers and nails to remove the evidence of the crimes that just happened.

Zoro’s bracelet was still on her wrist, the gold tainted by brahmin blood that had collected inside of the gold plates that hung from it. 

Nami’s eyes were out of focus, a blur of frames moving at turtle speed, unable to look at the two men cleaning her. But she didn’t need to see properly to know the horrifying sight laying out before her on the highway. 

Like cattle to the slaughter, they had been leaving Sabaody when hell broke loose, a rainfall of bullets scattered down, two dozen gunners giving their hiding places up. There was screams that came from a few of them about how Nami and the settlers had killed their friends so now it was time for revenge.

Nami had ducked away behind a car, a bullet hitting straight into her left shoulder and as she hit the deck, she realized there was a sliced up body impaled on metal poles along this stretch of highway. 

The settler she had sent back first had his body torn apart, limb for limb, with each one stabbed through with the metal poles. His torso had a metal chain shoved through it and tied to the poles with his arms, lifting it up for crows and bloodbugs to get their pickings in. The most disgusting part was the short metal pipe shoved into a right angle down what was left of his throat and his head had been decapitated to screw the settler’s head onto the pipe and making the pipe poke out of his right eye, mouth left open in a scream, and Nami wondered how much of the torture he was alive for.

Just from the sight of him, it was clear that there was no hope left for them.

One by one, the three settlers left succumbed to the bullets, unable to get away in time, and the screams of pain would probably haunt Nami’s nightmares for years to come. The poor brahmin came to run and hide with Nami, but it was brought to the ground when her back right leg was shot off and the brahmin fell with moos and groans of agony.

It was a pitiful sight and made her heart ache as hot tears slid down her jaw. She kicked herself up, bringing out a boot knife to stab into both of the skulls of the brahmin, giving the girl the peace she deserved, the noises silencing and chest growing still. The oozing blood from the brahmin sliding around on her hands when she shut the eyes of the animal.

A swarm of four gunners were suddenly on Nami’s body, guns beating into her flesh, and preventing her from doing anything to get out of their grip. She felt one of the male gunners swipe his hand over the front of Zoro’s jacket that was zipped to the top, his hand close to grabbing a full feel of her breast.

When a slash of a sword cut him in half, body sliding off of itself and spurting blood all over her body, and it was going to be over quickly now, she had decided.

Luffy was running headfirst at the rest of the gunners on the highway, she could hear the screams from them, the impact of the blows suffered by Luffy’s strength, and the flops to the ground in their death.

Before her was Zoro, a wicked glint to his eye, slashing away over and over and over again at the gunners that had surrounded her. Nami watched as his focus shifted to be on the one who had planned to assault her, puke rising and burning her throat as she watched him chop the gunner into pieces.

And into more pieces. Blood pouring out over the concrete, running over her shoes, splashing on her face and body.

Nami remembered that stare, from that night on his watch when she had set him ablaze with anger. Blood was everywhere. Everywhere.

The more the two went at it with their brutal strength, Nami retreated into herself, shaking uncontrollably and losing sense of what was going on around her. She didn’t want to see them like this, it wasn’t the matter of being scared, but seeing what Luffy and Zoro were capable of reminded her of rougher days in her early life.

Every time Zoro went for such a grotesque kill, she had the image in her mind of seeing the smoking gun in Arlong’s hand. The way Bellemere’s body caved in on itself, shoes flying in the air, the black ring of hole left in her forehead and more smoke pouring out. Bellemere’s blood had ended up on her face in that moment, as well as on Nojiko. 

Just like now. The blood from each cut and stab Zoro produced was in close proximity to her, painting her. It was too much for her senses to handle and her eyes slid shut, hiding away from the massacre.

Luffy and Zoro would always be a deadly pair together. More so than Sanji could ever hope to achieve by teaming up with the two because Sanji had his limits to how far he would go while Luffy and Zoro didn’t. This was especially true in the case of something involving all of their friends, but the two had also made it clear that they wouldn’t take anything happening to Nami and would act like this.

Right now, Usopp was properly working with Franky with what could be spared to decorated until the new materials got back to the settlement. Robin and Chopper would be preparing gift ideas for the boys who would have no clue about what to get. Sanji would be placing in orders for different ingredients and checking stock for the dinner. Brook would be cleaning and tuning instruments, deciding the order of the classic songs and writing his own. Jinbe would be picking up the slack that anyone needed and making sure people were getting done what needed to be. Law was probably trying to figure out a way to run and how long he might be able to hide out before Luffy found him.

Some time passed ever so slowly. Nami pushed out the noise of gushing blood and gurgles of pleading by placing her mind somewhere else.

A week and half would be Christmas, by this much time having passed, the tradition during this time was to be preparing for the Strawhats Christmas celebration. 

“People should stick to their traditions.” Luffy was the one to be dead-set in making Christmas happen every year. It wasn’t like this world really called for the holiday, the world was too destroyed for the majority to have the time to think on the holidays. 

Luffy was the one wiping the blood from her hands. A weird sight to see him so calm, but it was soothing to know the captain cared to be careful of the discomfort that radiated from Nami’s body.

Zoro cupped her chin with one hand and the other was cleaning the blood away from her face. She wondered if he realized the effect his skills had on her and not the good effect. Well, it was good to know he could keep her safe, yet there was a fear of what the man held inside.

He probably contained his own anger at times, like Nami did as a kid, and that anger led to who he became today. When Nami went the cunning route to counter what happened in her life, Zoro had built up a steady resistance in him and strength to demolish whatever stepped in his path again.

The two of them, Luffy and Zoro, they were made for this world, created for this wasteland. The two could survive without issue, it wasn’t the same as to how Nami’s main way to protect herself was by tricking the enemies or standing beside people for safety, rarely she could survive by her own hands, though during their past travels she had been better at it than now.

This was the wasteland.

A brutal and bloody mess, normal humans sent into a world of monsters and having to become monsters themselves to survive. The raiders were drove to drugs and insanity. Gunners fighting for the hell of it and for the money. Super mutants had been normal humans, subjected to experiments to make them into the monsters they were. The brahmin and radstag were normal animals in a lost world, now they were their own monsters by being mashed with one of their own breed, two cows and two deers forced into twins. The ghouls were normal people as well, the radiation seeping into their bodies so much that their skin was now papier-mache and slowly rotting their brains. Domesticated robots having codes changed to murder on sight, new robots created as pure killing machines. Synths would be used to kidnap the normal humans and replace them, driving fear into every single person that no one could truly be trusted. 

Just as Luffy had created traditions that they would all follow at their home, the wasteland had its own traditions.

If you can’t kill, you get killed.

Lately, Nami had been spending time out and about, but it had been nearly a year since the last time she went out before getting the feral ghoul blood with Zoro. She had grown so used to the setting of being inside walls and being away from reality. 

The life being built was worth the payoff, but it was destructive for her wellbeing.

“Nami,” Zoro’s lips were pressing at the skin behind her ear, Luffy had clasped their fingers together and circled her legs. “Where are you?” She turned into Zoro’s warmth and felt her eyes shaking.

The promise to Bellemere was that she wouldn’t cry. Nami broke that when she asked the first time for help against Arlong. A high rule for herself was broken because of the trust she had gained in all of her friends.

“Why are you here?” She bit the tears down, she did trust them, but now wasn’t the time to reveal all of the trouble inside.

“Mm, materials for Franky, lots of money, stories to look into...” She needed to hurry up and move on, get the bag of materials for Franky down from what was left of the settlers torso and go forward, not backwards. She needed to be away from her own head.

“It doesn’t matter,” Luffy said, catching onto Nami’s eyes and holding her gaze, “Did the trade go well?” Distraction, don’t think about this if it’s taking a toll on you, gather yourself.

Zoro tore away her hand from Luffy, lifting it to see the cleaned bracelet jingle against her wrist. “It looks better than I thought it would.” A smile stretched on his lips, pressing them into the skin just beneath her palm with a hum. “Your heartbeat is starting to even out, that’s good. You don’t have to be scared.”

He knew, of course he knew. The swordsman could always read her at nearly any given moment, only missing at certain times, that was part of the dynamic that Usopp would never understand. 

If she had half a mind of her normal senses right now, Nami would say that the two had been following along around her or ahead of her for a reason. The fact that Shakky said they went to the bar and the fact that they had been here to save her now.

Everything was everywhere in her mind, lost in a state of confusion she still couldn’t break.

Why had she been thinking so much about the past? Why did she have such bad luck to get the people she was supposed to protector murdered instead? Why, why, why?

Nami was spinning, she wasn’t sure if her body was even actually moving, she could barely make out Zoro saying something about her heartbeat, her pumping blood.

White. The sky was white, all the blue drained away and the sun hidden deep in the clouds. Snow was trickling down in shimmers, slow and unsure of the places that they wanted to stick to.

Nami’s breathing had increased, she had to be hyperventilating, her mind numbly noting the change.

Both Zoro and Luffy’s faces flooded her sight, their mouths were moving, but she didn’t hear a word. Then her eyelids slid closed and she felt the darkness flood her.

[madamewriterofwrongs]

May and the Rainbow Kingdom

911/Buck & May

Written for @cirrius-akiyo who wanted a Buck & May friendship.

The station was unusually quiet when she walked through the front door. The trucks were still in their place, being polished and restocked by other crew members – most of whom paid her no mind or recognized her as the ‘captain’s kid’. She’d only been called that once, but she remembered the uneasy feeling and the sneer of the probationary officer’s voice. A well-practiced eyebrow raised, and her best customer service smile, ensured he never bothered her again.

Today she wasn’t here as the ‘captain’s kid’, she was here as a friend in need of help from another – older and wiser – friend. A glance at the ambulance missing from its usual station dampened her expectations slightly.

“Hey, May.” She looked up to see a familiar face waving at her from the loft and she jogged to meet him.

“Hey, Buck. I was hoping to talk to Hen, is she around?”

The blond-haired firefighter returned to his task of tidying the upper floor (the table smelt comfortingly of bleach and lemon so he was nearly done) while she knelt on the couch to watch him work.

“Sorry; she just left on a call with Chim and Bobby. Is there anything I can help you with?”

She tried to keep the dejected sigh from her voice. “How versed are you on Bioethics of Non-Existence?”

It was almost comical, the way Buck paused in his sweeping to take in her question. “I definitely recognize some of those words.”

As she suspected; May turned to collapse onto the couch with a groan. “I really needed to talk to Hen.” Not that she didn’t trust the other adults in her life – Maddie had tried to help, but she’d been out of Medicine for too long – Hen was her last hope.

“School going that well, huh?” She didn’t have to look to hear the amusement in the man’s voice.

“It’s actually pretty good.” She admitted, still slumped half-off the couch. “I just have mt midterm on Friday and I really need someone who can test me on this stuff.”

“I’m sure you’ve got a handle on it. You were always a smart kid.”

May did smile at that. It was easier to accept being called a child from someone who actually knew her as a child. Granted, she and Buck weren’t overly close, but he was always nice to her, and Bobby seemed fond of him.

“I’ve studied this stuff over and over but I just don’t feel ready” she admitted to the ceiling. Maybe Buck should clean those rafters (he was certainly tall enough). Better yet, maybe she could do it. “I either need a distraction or another month of review.”

Maybe if she hid out at the station, she could lie to her professor and say she had a medical emergency. Or maybe, she could convince him to let her take her exam tomorrow and put her out of her misery. She hated the waiting game. The more she reviewed the material, the less secure she felt in her knowledge. It just needed to be over and done with so she could start stressing about the next thing. Her English essay was due next week. It could use a third rewrite.

“I don’t know about the review.” Visions of Buck peering over top of her, pulled May out of her spiral. “But if you’re in need of a distraction, I could use a co-babysitter tonight. I’m watching Christopher while Eddie’s out on a date and I’m sure he’d love to hang out with you.”

An evening spent with her stepdad’s friend, and her stepdad’s other friend’s son was not exactly what she had in mind for a Monday night, but it was better than nothing. Besides, she liked Christopher well enough; he was a cute kid with a sensible head on his shoulders. And Buck was nice – if a little bit accident-prone for the amount of times she’d visited him in the hospital – plus it was an excuse to get out of her routine for a few hours. Maybe she could come early and ask Eddie some questions (an army medic had to have some thoughts on ethics in medicine, right?).

“Sure,” she smiled up at him. “why not?”

Which was how May found herself squished between a surprisingly calm 10-year-old, and an overly-energetic 29-year-old, splitting the difference as she scrolled through their Netflix Kids’ queue.

Christopher had insisted that they didn’t need to use the kid’s channel as he was absolutely old enough to handle all the scary movies. She remembered Harry, not too long ago, with the same attitude (along with the same nightmare he’d had for weeks about a clown in a sewer). While Buck didn’t have the same experience, he was with her decision to stick to the lighter stuff for tonight. Perhaps he was being overly cautious as he always was with the boy.

Everyone in their circle knew about how Buck had saved Christopher during the tsunami and how close the three of them had become afterwards. It was no wonder he wanted to do everything in his power to protect him – even from the CGI monsters.

As they continued to scroll, she paused on their ‘Continue Watching’ bar, to see if there was anything they wanted pick up. She wasn’t about to watch whatever they chose for their post-dinner treat; she had her textbook and laptop in her bag all charged up.

Just as she was about to continue the search for the perfect movie, her eye caught one of the titles with a half-full red bar and shot a confused glance to Buck. The man kept his eyes purposefully trained on the screen, eyes darting to hers once, as a sign that he knew what she was looking at. Still, he showed no sign of explaining himself so she moved on. For now.

They ended up settling on one of the dinosaur documentary movies, but May kept her promise to herself and reviewed through the entire 90-minute event. It was easy enough to tune out, the graphics were fine, the story was predictable, but at least the boys on either side seemed to be enjoying themselves. Every once in a while, Buck would elbow her to pull her attention back to the screen but it never held her interest for more than a few minutes. Then Christopher would do the same, asking her questions or feeding her facts about the various dinosaurs. That did help for a little while, but even that kid’s endless enthusiasm couldn’t keep back the voice in her head that told her she should be studying.

As far distractions went, this night seemed to be a bust.

When she heard the water run in the bathroom, signally the beginning of Christopher’s bedtime routine, May found herself reaching for the remote once again; if only to keep her hands occupied while she waited to say goodbye to Buck. The least she could do was thank him for his attempt to distract her – even if it had failed.

That was when she found the ‘Continue Watching’ bar once again, and her curiosity got the better of her.

“What’s True and the Rainbow Kingdom?” she asked once her companion had returned. “’Cause it doesn’t seem like something Christopher would be into.”

Buck huffed as he flopped on the couch next to her. “Okay,” he began his confession by raising his hands in surrender. “I watched an episode to see if it was something that’d be appropriate for Nia, but I kind of started watching it on my own.”

“Really?”

“Yes, really” he matched her mocking tone. “Not all the time. But I’ll admit, when I’m having a bad day, it’s nice to turn my brain off with some mindless fun.”

She wasn’t laughing at him – maybe she was, but she wouldn’t tell him that – it was that the image of this grown man, sitting at home, watching what was clearly a Sophia the First carbon copy (if the design was to be believed), was very amusing to her.

“Wow, I see how it is.” Buck lightly pushed May as she shuffled over to create more space. “I try and help and instead you mock me. Very nice.”

Even as a joke, she saw his point and the laughter turned into a smile, which morphed into an eyeroll.

“You’ve got to admit, this doesn’t exactly fit your image.”

“I have no image” he protested. “I’m allowed to like whatever I like.”

“So, you wouldn’t mind if I text my mom that” she had barely begun picking up her phone from the coffee table, when he reached the device first.

“Don’t you dare.” More laughter did make her heart feel a little lighter.

He only handed her phone back once she’d half-heartedly agreed not to text her mom this fresh blackmail material. “I bet you’d like it. It’s about a girl and a cat, and she gets these wishes from a tree, and she uses them to help others.”

“The cat gets wishes?”

“Just” Buck rolled his eyes, grabbing the remote from the cushion between them. “we’re going to watch it right now.”

Without waiting for her response, Buck tapped the first episode and shushed her failed attempt to protest.

The first scene introduced a reasonably catchy theme song with bright colours, along with the main character True and her talking black cat named Bartleby. There was something about a party and a bitchy princess and a weird walking pill they called…something Banjo? Admittedly, when the cat said something sarcastic towards the girls, she cracked a smile, but her mind was still reviewing the differences between Potter’s and Callahan’s philosophies.

The next time she tuned back into the episode, they were sitting on mushroom stools under a tree, attempting to solve a problem as a group. When they took a deep breath, May found herself exhaling with them, and her forehead ached from holding tension for so long. Admittedly, it felt nice to relax her shoulders.

Okay, so this was clearly a kids’ show and nothing else. Mining wishes from a tree and using a book to decipher what all the wishes could do, as though they were Pokémon characters.  It was ridiculous, why was she still watching this? She needed to get home to study.  

“Sure, they get to use the ‘wishopedia’ but my professor won’t let me use Wikipedia as a starting source?” she grumbled under her breath.

“What was that?” She startled when Buck smirked at her.

May tucked back into the arm of the couch with a half-hearted glare. “Nothing.”

She really should be reviewing. The more time she wasted outside of the classroom, the worse her chances of success. She shouldn’t be wasting her time watching this kids’ monstrosity. This really was a stupid show. Why would True forgive Grizelda after she was such a bitch to Bingo-Bango? She was always so positive and patient. And she only used her special powers to help people. That was pretty nice.

That theme song was pretty catchy.

Before she knew it, she was four episodes in, watching two mushroom people win a motor race after everyone got detoured by falling crystals and Grizelda being a bitch (again).

“She should just toss the Cu-Bigly over the cliff and then throw Grizelda.” At Buck’s look of amused indignation, she shrugged. “What? She deserves it for sabotaging the race. It’s not like she’d die from that height.”

A quick glance at her phone told her it was after ten and she had a class in the morning. What astonished her most, was that she hadn’t thought about her course work in an hour. For the first time since starting university, she’d let herself escape her thoughts just for a little while; and honestly, she felt lighter for it.

Still unbelievably guilty for not spending every waking moment of her life preparing for her next test or assignment – but just a little bit lighter.

“Hey, Buck?” She turned to the man barely hiding the fact that he’d begun to doze off. May smirked when he awoke with a snort. “Thanks for your help, I really needed this.”

For a moment, she saw the ‘puppy dog’ that her mom liked to call him: the puffed chest and kind smile and excited eyes. She saw what won over her, somewhat cynical, mother; it made her smile brighter.

“Glad I could help.”

Buck was scrolling mindlessly through his phone two weeks later, when it buzzed with a new text notification, and his mood instantly improved.

87%

Also I may have finished the first season of TatRK

I totally ship True and Zee

Do you want me to wait for you to catch up?

“Hey, May passed her Bioethics Mid-Term” he announced to his friends sitting in the loft; the rest, he would keep as his own reward for a job well done.

Bobby looked up from his usual place in the kitchen, buttering a pan for some dish most of them wouldn’t get to eat. “Since when did May start telling you about her exam results?”

There was no honest answer that wouldn’t make him feel embarrassed, but Buck blushed regardless. “I, uh, helped her study.”

Eddie slapped his shoulder jovially as he passed on his way to grab a bottle of water. “Is there something you want to tell us? You have a secret Bioethics degree?”

Buck brushed him off with a smile. “No, but you do what you can to help out family, right?”

His eyes met with his Captain’s and there was a fondness he only saw with May and Harry. Something he hadn’t seen for himself in a long while.

“Yeah, kid, you do.”

[imma-potatoo]

I HAD TOO

I AM NOT SORRY AT ALL @superwholockandpfl

This is once again written for my friend k.c.cosplay on tiktok! Once again, amazing cosplays 💙💛💙💛💙💛💙

Same universe then this fic

*Logan is a dark side*

Ships: Loceit, parental logicality, parental anxceit

Warnings: none that I know of? Let me know if you want me to tag something

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Perseus and Andromeda

-----------

Logan and Janus stood in front of the other four. Smiles completely coated their faces as they both held out their left hands. Janus holding Logan's bicep with his right hand.

Rings. On both of them.

"You- you got married?" Patton's voice was timid. He didn't expect this day to come. But he currently wanted his father-son dance with Logan

Janus and Logan's faces quickly turned to shock. "What?! No! We're engaged! These are engagement rings daa-- Patton!" Logan blushed at the almost use of Pattons old title. Not that Logan didn't view Patton as a father figure -far from it, Janus and him were the youngest sides- but calling someone dad while you are practically the same age and completely imaginary is quite weird in his opinion but I mean-

"My love, your zoning out again."

Logan could hear the amusement in his fiance's voice. Squeezing Janus' hand slightly; Logan cleared his thoat, "What was that question again?"

Roman was slightly laughing before Remus elbowed him in the ribs, "OW REM-" "Roman sh! Do you have a date picked out yet?" Virgil had a hopeful shimmer in his eyes

Logan and Janus looked at eachother briefly, "Not really, to be honest" Janus laughed slightly. "He just asked me last night," a lose curl falling from behind the yellow sides ear. Logan quickly catching it to tuck it back to its rightful place

The sides migranted over to couch. They had a feeling that they'll be talking for a while.

"Any ideas on a theme yet?" Roman was bouncing enthusiastically, hands tight fisted on the couch. A huge ear to ear grin spread on his face

Logan hummed, thinking back to a precious conversation, "We're thinking victorian or dark academia. But we're open to any suggestions!" his hand was tracing circles over and over on Janus' back.

Roman jumped off the couch. Bouncing up and down over and over and over, "FEAR NOT MY BELOVED FRIENDS! I will help you plan it!"

Romans eyes sparkled rapidly. Grin glowing like wild, he paused for a second or two before gasping, "WE COULD HAVE IT IN A HUGE GOLDEN BALLROOM! With crystal plates! And a hundred foot tall cake! An-"

It was at that point where the blue and yellow sides completely zoned out to Romans tangent.

The newly engaged couple gave eachother a look. This look said a lot of things. But mainly 'are we seriously going to let a side who thinks throwing glitter at random objects equels fashion. Complete control of our wedding?' that look. Its a very very specific look. But its a very obvious look.

The red creativity seemed to notice the couples glazed over eyes and blank expression. So he quickly stopped his rant to add on a rather important detail, "I mean... If you guys want me to help. Its completely ok if you don't!! I mean, its ok, I just-"

"Roman for the love of all things holy. Please stop talking." Logan was rubbing his temple with his free hand, "We would love to have you help plan our wedding. But we don't need a ballroom, or crystal plates, or any fancy fairy tale type things." He squeezed Janus' hand with a bright grin, "We just need eachother."

Roman's dramatic pose and extreme tangent faltered. He paused. Seeming to process the information. Before a small grin took his face. "then thats what you two will have."

Janus moved his gaze from Roman to the green twin... Looking at the floor.... With a pout that could kill a god.... Looking very non-Remus esq.

"Remus, do you also want to help plan our wedding?"

In the span of a second, Remus' face bounced between 50 different emotions before settling on complete and utter happiness, "I THOUGHT YOU WOULD NEVER ASK MY AMAZING DOUBLE D-"

Patton slapped his hand over Remus' mouth, "lets not talk about my future son-in-law like that! eeewwwWWWWWW!!! ROMAN HE LICKED MY HAND!!" Patton snapped his hand away as soon as he put it on.

Laughter filled the rest of the night... And quite a bit of wine.

------2 mouths later-----

Logan grumbled as he threw another crumpled piece of paper against the desk. Elbows on the desk, hands pressing into his eyes.

His supposed vows were going amazingly. Completely. Totally. A hundred percent. Amazing....... Oh who was he kidding? His vows were going terribly.

Not from lack of love or anything absolutely ridiculous like that. He loved Janus more then the stars, moon and galaxies combined. He loved everything about Janus.

He loved Janus' snark. He loved the way his eyes glowed when they watched a movie. Or how Janus' voice drips like steeped honey and smoked chives. Or how his snake eye dilates when he's happy. Or when he gets excited and talks for hours and hours about a philosopher or a certain myth that sparked his interest or reminded him of their relationship-

Thats it.

The last myth that Janus was talking about was Perseus and Andromeda.

Andromeda was to be sacrificed to save her kingdom because her mother boasted about her beauty to the nererids. The nererids told their father, Poseidon, and as revenge; Poseidon sent a sea monster to ravenge the kingdom. Perseus, the hero who slayed Medusa, saw Andromeda chained to the stone and slayed the sea monster. After saving her, he took her hand in marriage.

It was far from their love story. Far far from their love story. But...

The way his eyes lit up.

Logan could get drunk on that look. He could live off that look alone for the rest of his life. Oh and that smile

Logan takes his head out of his hands. Mouth agape.

He had an idea

---------

Janus had been hitting his head against his desk for hours.

Janus could write millions of speeches, and could convince armys to do his bidding, and he could use empty words to get his desires.

But these damn vows.

Janus supposes that its because he isn't used to truth. But he wants too! But the truth seems to be avoiding him more then mouse with a cat.

Logan likes cats, he could never get one before because Patton's allergic. Should he even call Patton by his name? Wouldn't he call him dad now?

He allowed his mind to wonder for a short period of time. Elbows on the desk, hands pressing into his eyes.

This needs to be the truth and its not like he's low on love for Logan. Far far from it

They met when they were younger. Really really younger. He doesn't even remember it. But according to Virgil, Logan and him stared at eachother for five minutes before actually talking to eachother -more like babbling- after that they were practically inseparable. They did everything together apparently. Then they stayed friends for a long time. They barely even talked to eachother by the time that he introduced himself to Thomas. But...

But then Logan became a dark side. Logan started to unbutton the top of his polo. Logan stopped wearing the tie. Logan started to wear ice blue makeup. The Logan he knew as a child came back.

The Logan who loved science, bugs and books. Who loved ranting about old dead philosophers and Janus loved to listen. Logan loved old libraries and classical music. The Logan that used to watch Bill Nye as a child and knows the theme song by heart. The Logan that loved old myths and stories. The Logan who would go outside to the imagination and watch the stars and constellations for hours. His Logan

His favourite constellation was Perseus-

He has an idea.

----The Wedding Day----

Janus adjusted his suit for probably the millionth time. Running his fingers through his hair, attempting to make it lay properly. But only making the curls more wild.

Grumbling obscurities while trying to smooth down his damn hair, he heard low chuckles behind him.

"You know your only gonna make it worse, right Jan?" Virgil was leaning against the wall. His own hair absolutely perfect.

Janus sighed, "I know dad. But I just want my damn hair to lay properly for once! This is why I wear my damn hat-" the chuckles turned into full laughter.

"Logan will love you, no matter how your hair looks," Virgil stood up straight (HA) and walked over to Janus

He took a comb and started to go through his hair. Janus stopped growing by the time he was fifteen, so he was maybe at shoulder height with Virgil. "You need to stop worrying so much, and thats coming from me. Lo loves you more then the sun itself. Don't worry about something as silly as your hair."

Janus watched from the floor to ceiling mirror as Virgil expertly calmed down the mess of his hair.

Meanwhile.....

"Patton please stop crying. Your going to stain my suit-"

"BUT MY BABY'S GETTING MARRIED!!!" tears were still leaking down his face. He's been doing this since he came into the room -which was about twenty minutes ago-

Logan sighed, a smile apparent on his face as he patted his father figure on the back. "I know." he straightened his bowtie slightly in the mirror, "I just love him so much dad," Patton sat down in one of the dressing room chairs. A smile covering his entire face.

"Jan isn't really one to cry. But when I proposed to him? Tears just started leaking. I thought he was upset, so I went to comfort him," blush growing on his cheeks, "then he kissed me and looked me directly in the eyes and said yes." Logan felt a huge grin spreading on his cheeks against his will. He looked out of the mirror and back to his father. "He said yes."

Patton stood up from his seat and put his hands on Logan's shoulders, "and now its your wedding day. You two are going to get married and live out your lives being complete loveable nerds as you talk about philosophy and the stars and things I could never understand. You two are absolutely perfect for eachother and I can't wait to see where you two go next." while tears still shone in his eyes, the smile showed that they were of happiness.

They stared at eachother for a few minutes. Patton nitpicking small details to fix on Logan's suit.

"Janus the one walking down the isle right?"

Logan laughed softly, "yeah, he said it was a more dramatic entrance. Thats my future husband, right there"

Patton looked a little puzzled, "Can you even call him your future husband if the ceremony is starting in less then ten?"

"I mean, technically thats in the futur- wait. How much time was left?"

Patton blinked. Looking in the eyes of his son, "Ten minutes."

A look of panic shot through Logan. "We have to go!"

Logan grabbed Patton's hand. Pulling him out to the room. The celebration hall was stunning

It was outside, circle tables scattered around the clearing like the stars above scattered in the sky. A banquet table for the newly weds, their parents and their best men. The altar was covered in delicate fairy lights illuminating a soft glow. The shimmering stars above their heads shone brighter the usual. The constellations of Perseus and Andromeda were by far the brightest.

Logan stopped in his tirade to the altar. And simply looked at the brilliant view that the twins had put together for them.

For once in his life. Logan was speechless.

"They did a good job right?!?"

Logan was still looking around the meadow, amazed at every tiny detail. From the black dahilas that Remus insisted on including because of the famous unsolved murder, to the fairy lights climbing up the pillers that was no doubt Roman's doing.

"Its beautiful... How di-"

"The twins are a very creative bunch, kiddo!! We have five minutes until your wonderful groom comes out!" The other guests were starting to fill the room as Logan took his place at the altar. It was mostly figments that Thomas had made. Emile, Remy, The Critic, etc. They all took their seats and watched the meadow.

Logan walked over to his place next to the altar. Hands fidgety and resisting the urge to mess with the hair that he spent so long combing down. Roman stood at his side, while Remus waited at the other side of the altar for Janus. Before he knew it the music started to play, the quests rose from their seats, he felt his desire to stand straight. But none of those compared to when Janus walked into the room.

Janus walked in with Virgil latched on to his arm. A periwinkle blossem on the left of his chest. He still had his yellow gloves on -he really hated taking them off. Without the gloves, Janus couldn't lie- but he was without his hat. He was in a black tux with a yellow bowtie.

Logan couldn't think of anything else more beautiful. Logan couldn't think of anyone more beautiful then the side in front of him. Logan couldn't help the gigantic, ear to ear smile as Janus arrived at the altar and took his hands in his own.

The officiant -Who Roman just summoned from the imagination- cleared his voice and spoke to the whole room of people, "Friends and Family, we are gathered here today to connect two side's hearts and souls through this ceremony.

Logic Logan Sanders, Do you take this side to love and to hold, to protect and charish and to adore until the end of your lives?"

His smile growing wider, eyes sparkling with deep love and affection; Logan gazed into Janus' eyes, lightly squeezing his hands. "More then the sun and the stars."

The officiant smiled slightly before turning to Janus. "Deceit Janus Sanders, Do you take this side to love and hold, to protect and charish and to adore until the end of your lives?"

Tears shone throughout Janus' eyes. He removed his hands from Logans and for a second the blue side felt his heart drop, only for it to swell when he sees Janus remove his gloves and place his hands back in Logans. "More then every lie, secret and promise I have ever made."

The officiant turned back to Logan, "Please say your vows."

Logan felt his heart throb as he opened his mouth,

"Janus. In the very very long time that I have known you, I find myself falling more in love with you every day. I love how you laugh. I love how when you're tired you curl up to my side. I love how you stay by my side through it all. My translation from a light side to dark, my learning cerve to our new family, every dilemma from the others that we have to enviably fix.

Every night, every day, every hour, every minute, every second. You occupy my mind. And god Janus, I never want you to leave it.

I love you. I love you more then Perseus loved Andromeda." Logan's eyes were shining with unshed tears, he lightly squeezed Janus' hands. "I love you Janus and I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you."

The officiant nodded, then he turned to Janus. "Please speak your vows."

Janus drew a shaky breath before speaking.

"Logan, I honestly don't remember when we met. You were my only constant, the unchanging variable that I could always fall back on. You were always there for me and I want to always be there for you.

I love you more then anything Logan. The way you light up when a new documentary comes out, drives butterflies to my stomach. When you laugh, I get lightheaded. When you smile, I get bolts of electricity to my heart. When you take me to the imagination for a date among the stars, I get so love drunk that things get dizzy. When you took me to our favourite place and got on one knee, I cried tears of joy.

There is nothing that I don't love about you. I've always found honest words hard to process. But believe me when I say that I've said no lies to you. You are the one person I will never lie to. I love you more then Andromeda loved Perseus," Janus looked up at Logan. The height difference apparent, but he smiled like he never smiled before. "I love you Logan. And I cannot wait to call you my husband."

The two sides gave eachother looked at eachother with pure adoration and love.

"Please put these rings on eachother."

They could hear Patton's loud sobs in the background as they slipped on the rings.

The officiant smiled wide, "I now pronounce you, Husband and Husband! You may now kiss your groom!"

They flew together like magnets. Logan grabbed the side of Janus' face to pull him closer, the earthy smell of cloves and plums filling his senses. Janus held Logan's arms and pulled him towards him. The kiss was far from chaste, but they pulled apart not long after to be met with......

"NOW YOU GOTTA STRIP AND FU-- OW ROMAN!!"

"NOT AT THE WEDDING YOU BABOON!"

The twins were a very chaotic bunch...

The wedding continued perfectly as planned. Then it came to the father-son dances.

Virgil as Janus were doing well. Virgil was giving Janus his best wishes and telling him how proud he was if him.

Patton and Logan??

Patton always cries at wedding to say the least...

Then it was their turn to dance.

Logan took his husbands hand and led him to the dance floor. It was lit by only fairy lights and the extra bright stars. They twirled and spinned and danced like they was only the two there.

The two battled for the lead before Logan won. Hand now in the swell of Janus' back and leading him in a very elaborate ballroom dance. Janus' scales glowing a bright yellow. Even over the music you could hear their laughter.

Patton and Virgil stood on the sidelines. Watching as their children had their fun. Virgil hummed slightly, "you owe me twenty bucks Patt."

Patton was very confused, he hadn't made any new bets recently or borrowed any money. "Why is that kiddo?"

Virgil turned and looked at Patton, "Ten years ago, you bet me that Lo and Jan would never get married. You owe me a twenty."

Patton grumbled slightly as he pulled a bill from his jacket pocket and handed it over. "This is the best bet I've ever lost then."

Virgil laughed, purple beginning to dust under his eyes. "You got that right," He took two glasses of champagne from the waiters walking by, "To our beloved children?"

Patton took the glass and raised it with Virgil. "To our beloved children." they then took a long sip and continued to watch as the couple danced.

The stars shining above, the moon full. They loved eachother more then Perseus and Andromeda.

-------

I. REGRET. NOTHING!!!

I also have 0 self control soo

The charcters are very ooc... But I don't overly care.

💙💛💙💛💙💛💙💛

[f-117-nighthawk]

I’m in a Playlist Mood

I was scrolling through my dark matter tag looking for something I made a while ago to reference in the next chapter of Carry Me Home and ran across my last playlist explanation post. It put me in the mood to think about this again, and I’ve added...a lot. The playlist might’ve actually doubled in length since then (Thank You Abyss) and I’ve moved some stuff around in order. So, more playlist meta under the cut (it’s LONG)

So first thing: I’ve actually created two new playlists (well, one new one and actually made the third playlist have more than two tracks) since that post jhadsfljd. Working forwards in time (kinda), we have:

Dark Matter: The Road to Ruin

The Road to Ruin is the Main Playlist, the thing I use to write to, the thing I lie in bed and listen to to think up new things, and half the thing that keeps the timeline in place (it’s actually more updated than World Anvil rn whoops). Here we have overarching plot hooks, character development, and the story of six Paladins and their friends trying to save the universe.

Turn the Lights Out I sort of explained in the last post and I can’t think of too much more to add. The TLDR is it’s about the Lions (and, well, technically [REDACTED] too....) and sort of why I refer to a fully-melded Lion-Paladin duo as Spirits.

(I was here/Will you welcome and recognize me/I'll be there/I was here/Will you dread me, will you despise me/I'll be there/For the last living thing)

Remnants of Stars is again about Galran philosophy and the actual process of the quintessence nurseries filtering quintessence back into the universe. But the bit about giving in to know the truth becomes important much, MUCH later.

(As children of space/With stardust in our veins/We will give in to know the truth/We are the remnants of stars)

Your World Will Fail, Dark Matter, and Eater of Worlds are about [REDACTED], about what happens between that instant between the first plank time and the next. They’re an overarching theme, but also the event that everything else builds from, whether that be interpreted as the beginning of the universe or the Voltron comet crashing into Daibazaal.

(Your world will fail my love/It’s far beyond repair/Your world will fail my love/It is already there)

(Bring me your soul/Bring me your hate/In my name you will create/Bring me your fear/Bring me your pain/You will destroy in my name)

(Can’t imagine the violence/The rage and the love in my madness/I am the eater of worlds and I’m looking for someone to feed me)

Apocalypse 1992 is actually the main story of Through Apocalypse Skies, although its framing story is shortly after String Theory. It happens between parts of Awakenings, detailing the rise of [REDACTED] and the final hours before the destruction of everything sentient species knew beforehand.

(Fly high through apocalypse skies/Fight for the world we must save/Like tears of a unicorn lost in the rain/Chaos will triumph this day)

You Keep What You Kill covers the slow degeneration of the Empire between The Fall and the Battle of Arus. The knowledge harshly taught by the Thuanial War is forgotten under the influence of Zarkon, Haggar, and [REDACTED]. Marzin and Galraasa quickly rise the ranks as the Empire’s left and right hands, like omens of destruction before them. The four are the ‘holy half-dead,’ the ones who shape the devouring of the universe before them.

(Defying dimensions/These ruthless creatures will steal your soul/Breaking away from the chains of mortality/They won't be taken down/Bow now to the holy half dead/The master to death mongers calls)

The Seven Sisters is about Keith, mostly, and connected to Closure via its influence on Child From the Stars (Lost in the Dark) and also to Memories of a Girl I Haven’t Met

(I cast my hope upon The Pleiades/The Seven Sisters who would come for me/They'd fall to Earth to grant a child's dream/But I'm still waiting)

Starlight is the newly added Adashi song. Here, it’s the sad part, based around the time that the SFSS Genesis launches for Kerberos. It also is sort of about Shiro’s thoughts throughout the war as he watches ‘from distant skies’ (and influences String Theory kinda)

(At night the earth will rise/And I'll think of you each time I watch from distant skies/Whenever stars go down and galaxies ignite/I'll think of you each time they wash me in their light/And I'll fall in love with you again)

Abyss is Awakenings again. It’s specifically the Red Lion waking up on Sendak’s ship to her new Paladin, but also sort of the rest of the Lions as they find new Paladins for the first time since The Fall

(Open my eyes in a daze/How long has it been? Am I so out of place?/Warmth I can no longer feel/My mountain is gone, I'm surrounded by steel/The strangest of structures arises ahead/Seems to be held up by nothing/Where have I gone, do I dream?/How can the stars be all I can see?)

Who Will Save You Now is about the Paladins in First Contact. It’s the video messages they send to their families, the warning that Something Is Out Here that they need to prepare for. It’s a declaration of protection for Earth, but a recognition that the Paladins may not be able to do what they say.

(I will not take from you and you will not owe/I will protect you from the fire below/It's not in my mind/It's here at my side/Go tell the world that I'm still alive)

The End of the Beginning and Nobody Gets Left Behind are the aftermath of the Battle of the Sarnan Nebula, the end of season two. The End of the Beginning hasn’t been posted yet, but it’s also the second of the four Closure fics. The End of the Beginning also has influence on String Theory. 

(Every night I die just a little/All this time, I'm caught in the middle/All your life, you fought with no winning/This is just the end of the beginning)

(Don't even try to pretend/That you're rough and just as tough/As when you're missing a friend/Attack and take him back/Cause when the team isn't whole/You've got a hole in your soul)

A Simple Plan is sort of part of The End of the Beginning, but really takes place after it. It’s the newly shuffled Team Voltron attempting to track down Lotor as Haggar tries to keep him under her control, and the new Black Paladin’s slow shift away from the things that he was pushed into and to the Blade. (And... guess what... it has influence on String Theory!) Fun fact I found out recently: The Spiritual Machines are by and large also the people behind Les Friction, which explains so much.

(What is this space we’re climbing/What is this place we’re stuck in/Why do we feel we’re sinking/How do we get out – get out of this) 

Memories of a Girl I Haven’t Met skips all the way over Naxzela and to the Mission to the Baaria Shipyards, the first major offensive that isn’t somehow connected to canon (even if only a very very small part of it is actually at the shipyards lol). This is also the song that solidified Keith’s very queer identity in Dark Matter.

(In this lonely place, bathed in silence and thoughts of you/I can't see your face but I'm trying to envision you/So are you really out there? Are you awake with memories/Of a boy you haven't met yet who's wished upon the Pleiades?)

TRIALS (reimagine) and String Theory are.... hoh boy. [REDACTED], [spoilers], and the turning point for a lot of things, which is why it has the honor of being the separating fic between my two main Dark Matter folders. TRIALS being on here is a fun story, because I associate that song very heavily with my main Star Wars fics, since that’s where the series title comes from, but the reimagine version of it gave me such strong Dark Matter vibes, it ended up here. It has heavy influence on the first part of String Theory, and is what I’ve been using for general pacing of the first half. String Theory itself isn’t the weirdest song on the playlist, but it’s really hard to find the connections to it without several layers of abstraction and backstory on [REDACTED]. String Theory is also weaved into a good chunk of fics before it.

(The ending won't be forgotten/It's written in the stars and the hieroglyphs/Sending the lionhearted/The stones break bones, but we're venomous)

(You don't believe in space/You don't believe in light/You don't believe that anything is well beyond your might/We walk across the sky and beneath the ocean floor/We're never going anywhere we've never been before)

House on Fire is the aftermath of String Theory, and a large vibe of We ARE Struggling Together! (Rise Against says it’s about parenting???? lol fuck that) (okay but actually, switch the parental love part to sibling love/general familial love and that’s a pretty good description....)

(So I'll just hold you like a hand grenade/You touch me like a razor blade/I wish there was some other way right now/Like a house on fire we're up in flames/I'd burn here if that's what it takes/To let you know I won't let go of you)

Belgrade is the klance song! It is a) bop b) always stuck in my head because it is That Good. The line in the chorus about ‘sweet songs of seduction’ is eternally funny to be bc a)they’re both ace and b)QPR’s don’t usually involve seduction as far as I know. Belgrade also leads almost directly into...

(We pretend in the darkness/We pretend the night won’t steal our youth/Singing me the sweet songs of seduction/Let me be the fool, fool, fool/Who will live and die for you)

Here to Save You is about Sam. Mostly. It’s also about Pidge. And Zaivorge cannons.

(A slave for humankind/I made sure I would survive/To stay alive/Now it's time to move on/When there's nothing left to prove/I'm coming to get you)

Iron is what eventually replaced Ten Thousand Against One. The plot has actually changed a lot since it was that song like. two years ago (three?) at this point. It has more of a focus on Keith knowing what’s going on due to [spoilers] and coming to accept parts of himself that are suddenly very obvious (kiiiinda the third closure fic?)

(You can't live without the fire/It's the heat that makes you strong/'Cause you're born to live/And fight it all the way/You can't hide what lies inside you/It's the only thing you know/You're embracing that, never walk away)

Birthright and Firewall are not exactly a direct result of Iron, but they wouldn’t happen how they do without it. They’re actually largely about Lotor, but then [REDACTED] swings back into the fray and things learned in String Theory/the framing story for Through Apocalypse Skies hit in full force.

(The voices in my head have all begun to sing/(The voices in your head have all begun to sing)/And they sure as hell hope I am listening/(I sure as hell hope you are listening!))

(They come to your dreams with illusion/They come to bring shape to your mind/You know how to stop the intrusion/We all have to fight for our lives)

and then, The Day the Earth Collapsed

(How much time has been elapsed/Since the day the earth collapsed?)

Here Comes the Reign doesn’t come into full effect until several months after Birthright/Firewall after Galraasa meets their fate, but starts with The Day the Earth Collapsed. It’s largely about Haggar and [REDACTED]

(You made something they can't take away/Now bring the fire of the burning sun on everyone)

Closure is placed where the fourth of its fics is. Closure in general is a lot of Keith’s character development and some of the struggles he goes through to accept his place in the universe and the fact that yes, he does have people that care about him. The last fic is me shining a brighter light on Closure’s chorus and taking a ‘last goodbye’ as never needing to say it again

(I am the child from the stars/That got lost in the dark/Between heaven and hell/I am forced to live on/I am the cause when you sin/I am the demon you skin/But there is no more tears to beautify/This is my last goodbye)

Ember and Soulbound are two closely related missions involving both Voltron and the Blade (specifically the Dark Whispers) in which [REDACTED] comes in with a vengeance, and some revelations about certain people’s fates are had. Soulbound is actually sort of from Krolia’s perspective.

(Dark matter falling from the sky/Dancing flames reflecting in your eyes as you watch them burn/Watching all your riches witches burn)

(Soulbound, endlessly forever/Locked between the darkness and the light/Don't drown in the swarming, blackened rising/Hold on to humanity and fight)

Darker Matter and Other Worlds Than These are. Well. [REDACTED] and [spoilers] and String Theory’s revelations rearing their ugly head once again, but this time with extra context and just a little bit of [spoiler]

(Dream yourself away/The pull of you shredding time and space)

(There are monsters in the sky/There are demons in the sea/I have seen them with my eyes/I've seen what you won't see/Pull the wool out from your eyes/It won't shade your frail belief/In the end we cannot hide/There are other worlds than these)

Godhunter is a fun one. The combined effects of String Theory, Soulbound, and Darker Matter/Other Worlds Than These come to a head and Team Voltron goes, well, hunting.

(She's been watching for a century/With hatred, and with scorn/If you know the hunter's coming/Then you hide or keep on running/'Cause she's slain the gods before)

My Darkest Hour is revenge for Godhunter, as well as a distraction from it, although Godhunter continues all the way to Louder than Words. 

(When the sun comes crashing down/When the world is spinning round and round/I will face what must be my darkest hour)

Faster Than Light is almost direct aftermath of My Darkest Hour, and sort of the inverse of Godhunter, where now Team Voltron are the hunted, even as they attempt to continue hunting. Oh and, Marzin and [REDACTED] are big parts

(Once more we're flying fast as light/Dark matter passing in the night/Pursued by a force we can't outrun/As we hurtle towards a dying sun/We maneuver through the remnants of a moon/On the solar winds of supernovas/There is not a place to hide, the Matriarch is close behind/It's plain to see she's coming for us all)

The Reckoning, This is a Call, World on Fire, The Wind that Shapes the Land, and Louder Than Words are the finale, what everything has been building towards. Earth’s faction, Haggar, [REDACTED], Voltron, the Empire, and the Coalition, all clash together in a final desperate bid to finish or prevent the final result of Your World Will Fail/Dark Matter/Eater of Worlds.

(I see your face, find peace of mind/Between the madness and the sadness and the fire burning/The end of war, the great divine/We'll see the day of reckoning)

(This is a call to action/This is a call to arms/All lives for one, together/There are no false alarms)

(World on fire with a smoking sun/Stops everything and everyone/Brace yourself for all will pay/Help is on the way)

(Search within/Uncover the will to win/Turn against the tide that washes o'er/Find the strength to fall and rise again/Open up the gates, unleash the force/I am the wind that shapes the land/Old as time and twice as strong/Oceans arise at my command/I alone can carry on)

(We have the force to fight/We have the blinding light/A war is more than heard/Coming in louder than words)

Dystopian Fiction

Dystopian Fiction is focused on what happens on Earth during the main playlist. I split it out because putting stuff like Cross the Line on the main playlist was getting clunky, and I figure Adam and Veronica (and the rest of the Paladins’ families, but mostly those two) deserve a chance for their story to shine on its own.

Dark Matter is on here because title track, but also it does end up with effects.

(Don't stop, don't think/Move up, don't blink now/On your knees pray for rain/Don't breathe when you take your aim)

Codebreaker is Adam’s song! I have him primarily as a cryptologist for the Garrison, teaching on the side and as a reserve pilot. Aviators says Codebreaker is actually about Cyperpunk 2077 but uhhh Fuck That it’s about Adam being The Best and dealing with...

(Codebreaker can't you find/Can you read between the lines of code?/Tell me all that you know/How far down the hole does it all go)

Cross the Line is the Éskhayklos’ image song. They’re a neo-luddite movement turned terrorist group that are upset with the way the Sol Federation is trying to fix Earth, stating that humans are the one that pushed it into this state, they should leave it to die and die along with it. Akane Shirogane was their worst nightmare. Cross the Line fits because, well, they crossed the line when [spoiler beep] and they were happy about it. (And “human cause” comes into play later when they pick up anti-alien leanings)

(Cross the line, redefine, break away unbent, unafraid/Together we stand in the dark/Seeking the light and what is right, together we cross the line/Our journey will come to an end and then our human cause will be/Justified)

Who Will Save You Now here is about Sam, and the aftermath of Here to Save You, in addition to its referenced role in the main playlist

(Alone with this vision/Alone and blind/Go tell the world I'm still alive)

The Day the Earth Collapsed is exactly what it says on the tin.

(How much time has been elapsed/Since the day the earth collapsed?)

Dystopian Fiction is the title track for this part. With the events of The Day the Earth Collapsed, the Garrison and our heroes on Earth are at their lowest point. It really is a piece of dystopian fiction, between [spoiler] and [spoiler]. And also: “Nobody can shoot me down, not just yet” is about Adam bc Fuck Canon

(I'm a dead man/In the wasteland/I'm a soldier fighting for superstition/Under search lights/In the long nights/We've been written like dystopian fiction)

The Reckoning is the only one of its little subset that made it over here, because it’s the only one that references events from before its eponymous fic (both verses are Very Earth)

(We're all alone, walking in twilight/The night has been long and so many have fallen/Feel no remorse, light will be breaking/Our freedom is worth it all)

Filaments

Filaments is the least complete, mostly because it’s the ‘sequel series’ of sorts. I have ideas for it, but I still haven’t posted most of the major story beats from the main portion of Dark Matter, so I’ve been purposefully putting it on the backburner. I do have enough to write Carry Me Home and put some foreshadowing in other fics.

Dark Matter is here because, well. A) Title track, B) yes, it still has effects. It’s the overarching theme, after all. Filaments sort of has a subtitle itself, which is ‘The Undoing,’ after the other part of the lyric that the subtitle of the main playlist comes from. It’s about undoing a past mistake (that wasn’t obviously a mistake until much later) and reconciling the events of Your World Will Fail.

(I am the keeper/I am the secret/I am the answer/I am the end)

Filaments is the title track of this part. It’s... a little hard to explain why without giving away the entire plot (what little I have planned lol) but it’s about the connections between different parts of the universe, and some fall-out of Darker Matter/Other Worlds Than These.

(These glowing filaments/Conducting this enchanting/Sarcophagus that's holding us)

Starlight is, again, Adashi song, and this time the happy part

(Don't leave me lost here forever/I need your starlight and pull me through/Bring me back to you)

Carry Me Home is what I’m in the process of writing right now, and it’s about the aftermath of the Quintessence War, specifically about how Shiro decides to settle down on Earth and what he does to build himself a home.

(Carry me home to the morning light/carry me home before you wave me goodbye/Oh, carry me home...)

[flydotnet]

Hidden Guardians of Humanity

VRAINS Rarepair Weeks 2018 - Day 7: Other YGO series crossover/Other Fandom AU

Summary: Six teenagers regularly save the world from the misanthropic virus-like AI XANA on a virtual world. This is their story through one of these missions against humanity's greatest danger yet. 

Fandoms: Yu-Gi-Oh! VRAINS/Code Lyoko Ships: Hireshipping (Ema/Akira), Entrustshipping (Takeru/Kiku), Zinniashipping (Miyu/Aoi)

Wordcount: 3.8K words

Notes: "On ira, on saura, sauver notre existence, Se donner une chance de tout dépasser. On ira, on saura, sauver notre existence, Afin de faire, Un monde sans danger !"

I was stumbled at first with what to do for today. All the crossover ideas I had weren't very good... until I thought about Code Lyoko and how it was a perfect fit with VRAINS. A virtual world? Check. Keeping stuff secret from other people? Check. A recurring theme of AIs? Check. I rediscovered CL this year by watching the episodes now all up on YT (I think that's only for the original French dub, though). It's been a big part of my childhood and I surprised myself to like it even more as an adult. It was pretty messed up if you think about it: a bunch of teenagers ranging from 13 to 15 saving the world in secret on a daily basis while risking their lives to do so? That's dark for a kid's show dude. The series wasn't hiding it anyway: I can't count the exact number of ways XANA (a big bad virus-like AI) tried to kill the protagonists in. Anyway.

I changed a few settings. Kadic is supposed to be a middle school (collège), but since it's supposed to be a high school too (funny enough, the school it's based on, the Lycée Lakanal, is where I set a part of my original work), well why not. It fitted much better with the VRAINS cast too. I also took some liberties with the original 2003 run of the show to provide more modern technology like smartphones.

This story is, in short, a love letter to Code Lyoko and to my VRAINS OTPs. I may have forgotten to put the romance into that fic though.

PS. The quote in the beginning is the chorus to the Code Lyoko opening, "Un Monde Sans Danger" (A World Without Dangers). That song has been burnt into my soul ever since I was a kid. 

Event hosted by @vrainsrarepairweeks

AO3 version available here.

It was yet another day of class at Kadic High School, Boulogne-Billancourt, Hauts-de-Seine. Nothing out of the ordinary, for once: boring Physics lessons, typical teenage drama, rumours going through the school about teachers and students alike. In that, it made no difference to any other day before it and any other day that would come after it. However, the routine was only a façade in this school near Paris.

Very few knew about the shortcut in the heater room of the dormitory or the one in the school’s park leading the abandoned factory nearby, resting in an island in the Seine. Most people would have just assumed that place was, well, abandoned and empty. The fact was that: that was wrong. That fact was proven untrue by the presence of a bunch of teenagers going there to save the world on a daily basis.

 However, today was a tranquil day in class of rumours and drama. There was always Naoki Shima spreading some kind of rumour on his idol, an e-sport player named Playmaker, which was mostly talked about by fangirls of him around the campus. Meanwhile, a little group of six students was gathering in their usual spot: near the coffee machine, on a bench, waiting for bell never to ring the beginning of classes.

They had formed this little group of friends of theirs in unlikely circumstances. It all started when Ema, from the twelfth-grade class majoring in computer sciences, discovered a way to access the abandoned factory in the river easily after a boring day of school. She apparently had to drag with her Akira, her classmate and a friend since middle school, there. Afterwards, they accidentally dragged with them Aoi, Akira’s younger sister in tenth grade, when she followed them to the factory on one day and stuck with them ever since. With Aoi came her own classmates Takeru and Kiku, who followed suit after they themselves found out about the factory by being friendly to the otherwise isolated Aoi.

 “Hey, guys,” Takeru opened the conversation as he looked at the other students in the courtyard. “It’s been a while since XANA last attacked… You think he’s going to come back soon?”

“I hope not,” Kiku replied with the most honesty in the world. “He almost killed sent everyone to space last time… We were lucky you were competing in the martial arts tournament that time, Takeru!”

“XANA will always come back until the Supercomputer isn’t turned off, I’m afraid,” Akira stated as he came back with two cups of coffee in his hands.

“Then that means you need to find the program to materialize Miyu soon!” Ema enthusiastically added as she thanked Akira for the cup of coffee. “It’s on me next time.”

“I’m doing what I can, but it’s going to take longer than expected. Last night was a fluke again,” he sighed as he rubbed his eyes with the hand not busy holding a cup. The yawn would be for another day.

“It’s fine, big brother,” Aoi simply said as she looked at him with a tiny smile. “You’re already doing your best, and Miyu has told us that before.”

“Your sister is right, Akira, don’t overexert yourself for that! I don’t want to recover your unconscious body on the floor of your room again and almost get scolded by Jim again for sneaking into the boys’ dorm for that!”

Takeru and Kiku simply giggled at the anecdote despite how many times Ema had already told them about it.

During Maths class, as usual, Ema was on her phone during yet another boring lecture from the teacher. There had to be someone watching over Lyoko when nobody could be at the factory in case an activated tower, XANA’s gateway to their world and all the potential damage that would always bring with it, showed up in the virtual world. That was a nice way to spend time: instead of sitting through a painfully tedious session of mathematics, she could just chat with Miyu and whoever else was online. It was funnier to be there and occasionally see Akira stare at her to be serious during a class for once.

He only didn’t ask her to stop on the spot because she otherwise could refuse to lend him their philosophy lessons whenever he’d simply stop understanding most of it. The confusing words and concepts didn’t work very well with his arithmetic brain. It was a fine compromise, though.

 Right when she was about to point out something funny Aoi had said in the chatroom with Miyu, she heard a strange buzzing sound. The neon over their hands started flickering ever so slightly, before the infection spread to the entire ceiling of the classroom.

“You know what this means?” she asked Akira in a whisper.

“A XANA attack. Did Miyu tell you about an activated tower?”

Her eyes immediately darted to the screen, only for a message to confirm their fears. Akira didn’t add anything more.

“Then what excuse do we throw?” she asked again, eyeing the little app she had on her phone she had freshly finished programming in her spare time (or whatever was left of it these days).

 Before she could ask anything, the bell rang. Their eyes bolted in different directions, checking for two different parameters: hers to the teacher, his to the hour on his phone. The former didn’t have a watch, the second didn’t match the time class ended at. As everyone was packing their things together to change classrooms, another ring resonated through the corridors: the fire alarm.

“Okay, it’s definitely a XANA attack”, Akira stated the obvious. “Warn everyone to meet together at the factory before we can get spotted by teachers or monitors.”

“Roger that.”

  It always took some time to reach the factory and gather everyone. That was why they had this habit of only meeting in the main computer room instead of in front of the factory, giving them more time to fight against whatever XANA had to throw at them on Lyoko. Akira and Ema had arrived first and launched themselves in the elevator to the main rooms before getting joined by Aoi shortly thereafter.

“Takeru and Kiku will be a bit late,” she told them, “I think they had class on a higher floor and had more troubles exiting the school.”

 Moments after, the three had taken their respective spots: Akira at the main computer, Ema and Aoi in the cylindrical scans on the floor under the computer room. He had never been a man of actions and was the only one with a real knowledge of how to use the technical beast that was the Supercomputer. Meanwhile, Ema had always loved the thrill of action: fighting creatures on Lyoko was good way for her to exhort her thirst for a way to break away from the real world, even if it was just for a few minutes. Aoi was calmer, but still followed through when she learnt this could help both her brother and the friend she had found in Miyu.

“Are you ready to get virtualized?” he asked them as they set foot in the room, footsteps resonating on the iron floor.

“Of course!” Ema replied with thrill in her voice.

“I am,” Aoi responded more seriously.

“Then let’s get on with it.”

 Four scanners presented themselves to the two girls. Each climbing in one, the virtualization process didn’t take more than thirty seconds anymore. They were used to it: getting transferred inside a virtual world wasn’t painful, at best it was dizzying the first few times. Soon enough, Aoi and Ema found themselves in a forest-like environment, all changed up to battle attire. It wasn’t just for show: if Aoi had wings, it was because she could use them to fly. Ema, who hadn’t design herself in her subconscious mind to get those, was kind of envious.

“Miyu should be nearby waiting for backup,” Akira’s voice arrived from the sky of Lyoko’s Forest territory. “Be careful to monsters, XANA has been waiting for us.”

“As usual,” Ema sighed, amused. “Let’s do this, Aoi.”

 As they ran to their destination, a tower with a red halo, a girl with long pink hair in pigtails and blue eyes joined them. Aoi’s eyes started to shimmer as soon as they noticed her coming towards them, changing her sprinting direction to directly meet up with their friend. They had a habit of hugging each other as soon as they saw each other too. They had gotten more and more physical when meeting up in Lyoko, to the point of holding each other’s hands nowadays when seeing the others. Ema was certain that, would Miyu know about love like any other girl (despite being a sentient AI that was, frankly, more human than some actual humans she knew), they would already be dating. She remembered overhearing Aoi train herself to declare her love to her friend in her dorm room, after all.

“I’m glad to know you’re alright, Miyu!” Aoi told her as they went back to reaching the tower.

“Thank you for coming so quickly, Aoi, Ema! XANA has sent three Bloks who are guarding the tower, we need to be careful!”

 Turning her eyes away from the two friends, Ema noticed one of the Bloks shooting at them.

“Out of the way!!”

Pushing Aoi and Miyu out of the line of fire from the creature sent to them, she took a direct hit to the shoulder from a laser beam, falling to the ground. Trying to shoot back with her own laser arrows at the creature, she was at least relieved to see Aoi and Miyu had made it behind a tree to find a way to shelter themselves from the incoming attacks.

“Ema!!” Aoi’s scream was accompanied by the mirror of Miyu’s mirror reflecting the hit the older girl was about to take, which would have certainly devirtualized her. The Blok took the hit right in its eye, exploding shortly after.

 The commotion from this encounter passed, the three girls hid behind the very same tree. There were mock Bloks in the area, almost twice as much as they had first expected. As she watched from behind their little hiding spot, Ema could only notice this would be harder than expected with Miyu virtually unable to fight for herself and herself having taken a hit already.

“That was such a close call!” Miyu sighed in relief. “We really need to be more careful…”

She was holding onto Aoi’s hand as she said so, her sceptre in her other hand. Nobody knew where that weapon came from, really, but they had brushed it off as a mere way to self-defend against XANA’s monsters who, as it turned out, mostly used laser beams with long ranges to attempt ending her own life.

“Let’s be more careful until Takeru and Kiku can get here,” Aoi decided, with the two others nodding in agreement.

  “Sorry we’re late…!” Takeru said as he entered the main computer room, breathless.

Akira immediately turned around, his one-ear headphone-microphone still on, a smirk drawing on his face. Backup was finally here.

“Jim tried to prevent us from reaching the factory when we tried to go through the heater room shortcut,” Kiku further explained.

“I see. Ema and Aoi required backup, there’s apparently too many monsters for them to deal with.

She glanced at her childhood friend whose back was against the wall, still not recovering his breath.

“Are you okay, Takeru?” she asked with concern all over her tone, hands on her chest.

“I… I’ll be fine… Let’s get to the scanners quickly, I’m sure Aoi, Ema and Miyu need our help…”

 Even if nobody added anything, Akira turning back to the monitor to make sure this wasn’t a burning failure yet, Kiku remained worried. As the elevator went down another floor, she couldn’t get her eyes off Takeru and how flimsy his breathing was. He had never had a pristine health record, and that despite how good he was at martial arts, which made it so she was always concerned in some degree for his condition.

When the doors opened to reveal the scanner room, she handed her friend her help. He gave her a slight smile, a quiet way to tell her not to worry, as they climbed into their own cylinders to get virtualized. There was no time to lose and no time to get concerned for Takeru when there was a tower to deactivate and XANA going on a rampage to make everyone deaf by the end of the day through abusing ringing systems, ringtones and speakers.

 The two soon enough ended in the Forest territory of Lyoko, with instructions given by Akira to join back the others. Running on their legs, the virtualization keeping them away from whatever feeling of physical fatigue they’d have felt from that, they soon noticed the group of monsters blocking the way and their friends behind a big tree.

“Oh, looks like XANA did already send a party,” Takeru noticed. “Let’s be sneaky and see if we can end them without Miyu being targeted by them.”

“Agreed.”

 “Takeru! Kiku!”

Miyu seemed ecstatic to see them arrive, screaming their names in joy. Only then did she put her hand on her month, remembering XANA’s monsters could hear them. It was easy to make a diversion, but that was it.

“Akira!” Ema yelled to the sky to get their control tower’s attention. “How much enemies are they?”

No response.

“Oh God, that’s bad,” she then spoke to herself. “He must have been knocked away from the main panel.”

“Something happened to my brother?” Aoi panicked immediately thereafter, before clutching Miyu’s hand to keep her calm.

“It may have,” Kiku added as she joined them. “One of us needs to go check.”

 They stared at each other, before Ema decided to take the head of things.

“Okay, I’ve got a plan. Aoi, you stay with Miyu to make sure she arrives to the tower in one piece! I’m going with Takeru to face them directly, while Kiku shoots them from the back. I’ve already taken a hit and Takeru has a powerful long-range weapon. Everyone’s good with that?”

“Roger!” Everyone replied in unison as they split in groups.

 Ema had in her mind the secret hope of being devirtualized immediately. Takeru had less health point than she did, but she had already taken a hit and was the only one with any knowledge of the Supercomputer outside of Akira who seemed to spend a huge chunk of his nights on it. It was a perfect match for who had to go back to the real world to check on their friends.

She could see Kiku in her white kimono-like robe, braid flowing through the air as she ran and ran, in the corner of her eye running behind Bloks to stab them with her spear in their top eye, jumping on them, braid going up and down, causing their own self-destruction. She was clearly always going for those targeting Takeru, in a nice touch. The boy was himself with her throwing fire at the enemies, either to blind them or critically damage them.

In the corner of her other, Miyu and Aoi ran with their fingers intertwined, the latter with her own weapon out, ready to jump into action if needed. It was a safer solution for them than for Aoi to hold Miyu as she flew over the battlefield just in case she’d get shot in the wings: would that happen, they’d both take considerable fall damage and risk getting devirtualized. The possibility meaning the death of Miyu if it took place, they preferred to stay safe and go a bit slower. Good stuff there.

 Because she wasn’t paying all her attention to monsters, Ema quickly found herself to be devirtualized by a second hit in the chest, making her virtual body shatter in pixels before she could resurface in the factory.

  Exiting the scanner after getting forcefully devirtualized wasn’t the best feeling in the world, but Ema had no time for dizziness. She ran as fast as possible to the elevator and rushed her hands over the panel to go to the upper floor. They weren’t strangers to XANA using towers to gain access to the real world. In fact, they were even used to Akira getting attacked as to hinder the progress of those on Lyoko. The question was: what had it done to her friend while she was away in the virtual world?

As soon as the door opened, she realized two things: XANA had used a severed electric cable to do its deed, and Akira was unconscious the floor because of it. Her first thought was to rush to his side, to check if he was doing fine. A hand on his wrist, another on his forehead, and her eyes half-focused on the severed cable which now looked as inert as it should be, she let out a sigh of relief when she heard his pulse.

“You scared us again, you idiot,” she muttered under her breath. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to keep an eye on an important mission.”

 She gently half-sat Akira against a nearby wall and jumped into the chair facing the screens monitoring everything. Embracing the control tower nature of it all, she picked the headphone and put it on her ear.

“Anyone, you’re receiving me? It’s Ema!”

Everyone or so replied positively.

“Lemme see…” Her eyes deciphered as much information as they possibly could on the monitors. “Takeru, you’re down to 20HP, be careful! One hit and you’re sent back home! Kiku, there should be a Blok behind you! Aoi, Miyu, you’re near the tower, you may be able to fly there…”

 She interrupted herself when she saw the cable rise back to life, just as she heard everyone call out for Takeru’s voice. Getting down to her feet, taking a fighting stance, she hoped to be able to fight it back enough to have the time for the boy to reach her room. She knew how to activate the Return to the Past to fix all the damage the buildings around the school must have taken from the excessive sound, if the fact she was able to hear some low-quality rap music from the underground rooms of a factory was any indication, but Takeru didn’t.

Avoiding getting tripped by jumping over the cable’s feet, she was relieved to hear Takeru running towards her. He looked a bit out of breath from running so quickly in so little time, but he took his own fighting stance.

“Ema, get to the computer! I’m sure the others need you there!”

 Nodding to him as to confirm his decisions, she jumped back into the chair to see the information: Kiku was close to devritualization with a mere ten HP remaining while Miyu was just about to enter the tower. Trying her hardest to ignore how one-sided Takeru’s fight against the cable was becoming in favour of XANA, she focused on the screens. The boy’s pained scream when his back slammed against the wall didn’t help. Before she could entirely redirect her focus, Kiku had been defeated by a last laser beam.

“Aoi, be careful, Kiku just got eliminated!”

“We know,” the brown-haired girl replied from the other side of the screen. “Miyu is entering the tower now, I’ll try to keep back the last enemies until she can deactivate it!”

“Good, but please make it quick, Akira got stunned and Takeru may be injured from fighting a cable. I’m afraid I’ll be the next, not going to lie there.”

 Kiku soon joined the scene, judging from the elevator’s doors opening again and her little steps rushing to Takeru’s side.

“Ki… Kiku…” His weakened voice tried to warn his friend. “Don’t… Come here…”

Without a word, avoiding getting knocked back by the giant cable, she kneeled next to him, her gaze soon fixated on her friend rather than the incoming danger.

“Are you alright, Takeru?!”

“I… I think I’ve broken something against it… But it’s gonna be fine,  don’t worry… I’m sure Miyu is about to deactivate the tower…” He gave a timid but warm smile to her.

She gently held him against her, a half-felt one on her lips…

“It’s going to be fine. It’s always going to be fine.”

Judging from Takeru’s weak grip, she knew his hand had been broken in his fight against the machine.

  Entering the tower, Miyu made her way as fast as possible to the little panel presented in every tower. As soon as she put her hand on it, the system automatically recognized her, greeting her with the ever same and cold protocol.

MIYU

CODE: LYOKO

The entire tower progressively turned empty as it deactivated. From this little virtual pseudo-cocoon, she could only hope as she looked down everything was fine outside.

 Soon enough, the familiar energy wave of the Return to the Past resonated through the virtual world, making her smile as she thought that, once again, everything would be fine and that they had all saved the day.

  They were back in the same Maths class, which was still boring, still not interesting. A side effect of using the Return to the Past, obviously. At least, she could safely say that

“Hey, do you remember what happened to you before you got unconscious earlier?” she asked trying to hide her concern.

“I got electricized by a cable, that’s all I can remember. It doesn’t matter much anyway, the Return to the Past cancels every injury we could have sustained.”

“Well, that’s fortunate for Takeru, he broke his hand when fighting the cable.”

 Akira suddenly looked very pensive, before having a sort of epiphany flashing on his face.

“That makes me think… I should teach you how to use the Supercomputer, Ema, in case this ever happens again,” he whispered to her.

“I’m not against it. I already know how to use it, as you can see, but you could show me your… special tricks.”

The slight innuendo was enough to make him redden in a moment and look to the side.

“D-don’t phrase it like that…”

She grinned at his embarrassment. He was way too easy to tease, but it was always so much fun.

“Oh, by the way,” she added, “your sister is probably going to get a girlfriend soon, and she won’t even be material unless you come up with your program.”

“E… Excuse me?!”

“Miyu. She’s in love with Miyu and vice-versa. It’s just that you’re never here to see them flirt with each other knowingly or not.”

“Oh. That makes sense, when you precise it that way.”

“I know.”

 Now, if she had the same modesty as Aoi, maybe she would have the guts to tell him about her ever-growing crush on him…

[theonceoverthinker]

OUAT 2X22 - And Straight On ‘Til Morning

Despite all the mourning from the last episode, we’re gonna go straight on ‘til we finish off this season.

...Wanted to make my last pun of the season classy. Now you know what to do.

Press Release The inhabitants of Storybrooke brace themselves for the end when Greg and Tamara detonate the trigger Regina had placed within the curse, with the annihilation of the town and its residents imminent; and Mr. Gold mourns the loss of his son, Bae/Neal. Meanwhile, back in Neverland of the past, Hook discovers his connection to a young Bae after he rescues him from the sea and soon realizes that the Lost Boys are in hot pursuit of the boy. General Thoughts - Characters/Stories/Themes and Their Effectiveness Past I really struggled with how I felt about the past segment. Something about this flashback has always rubbed me the wrong way (Or at least, as much as the two times I’ve watched it can do) and I spent the lesser part of two days wondering why. And I think I finally figured it out.

The actions and broad strokes of this storyline are great, as is admittedly much of the dialogue. I like the bond that forms between Killian and Bae and I like how Killian’s framed. The dialogue is for the most part pretty good and I love all the time we get to spend on the Jolly Roger. However, the thematically heavy lines like “being alone” and “caring only about yourself” are honestly so distracting because Killian’s is blatantly committing revenge on Milah’s behalf and he has a whole crew with him.

Now on one hand, I get it. Especially given Killian’s decision at the end of the flashback, one can argue that Killian’s revenge and the decisions stemming from it are more for his sake than Milah’s. It’s similar to what Regina was doing with Snow and her subjects, where she claimed that after she killed Snow, she’d show them love. On the other hand, as I said before, it’s honestly so distracting and I feel like if the above were the case, there would’ve been more to paint it that way.

Okay, so now that I’ve gotten that out of my system, just remember: The segment is good, but dialogue choices like that separate good from great. The drama between Killian and Bae is one of the most important parts of Killian’s redemption and their bonding provides serious insight into who Killian is as a character.  Present First off, I love the way Neal’s “death” was handled. First, let’s talk about the acting. Robert Carlyle continues to be flawless. He shows how Rumple’s overcome with sadness and regret immediately upon hearing the news. Second, I love how he’s paralleled against Henry. While Henry has his mother to lean on and hold (A great if not tragic Swan Believer moment in and of itself), despite being told the news by two people, Rumple’s in the shot where he first takes it in alone and only comforted from a distance. Third, it gets Rumple questioning his own philosophy and is one of the biggest cases of “all magic has a price” being turned on him. It’s nothing short of a spiral and the way he pulls everyone down with him fits the character so well.

I got so many Spongebob Musical feels as I was thinking about the main story here. XD I’m going to explain it when I get to arcs, but I think that the main story does a good job bringing together Emma, Regina, Henry, Snow, and David’s stories. Every emotion here hits and the main story, which seemed to rightly get the most focus, was handled well.

Keep that in mind when I go off here.

”I did it [Kill Cora] because it was easy. It was a mistake.” FUCK THAT NOISE! NO! IT WASN’T EASY! IT WAS ACTUALLY BOTH DIFFICULT IN EXECUTION AND IN ITS AFTER EFFECTS! It was cruel, sure. And I get the guilt, but honestly, it was Cora (An uncontrollable monster) or Rumple (Someone who had been persuaded to do good in the past and could in the future AND had two morality pets to keep him on the straight and narrow). Fuck the noise where this was a wrong decision and that GOD this is the last instance where Snow says something like that! “There were other paths -- harder paths.” AND THEY WOULD’VE RESULTED IN MASS MURDERS ALL AROUND. FUCK! The ONLY good thing about that shitty flashback in “The Cricket Game” was that you supposedly learned that this idea was bullshit and you just threw that idea out like a dirty diaper! FUCK THIS SET OF LINES! It’s especially infuriating because it comes in the middle of a GREAT Snow scene where her optimism and leadership are so well shown!

Finally, What’s interesting to me is how Killian immediately dismisses Emma’s speech about being alone and being part of something by asking “Why are you really doing this?” Bae, being dead and Henry no longer having a father, is the spark that becomes the flame of his redemption. I’m with @sab031794 with the idea that Bae is definitely his turning point, while Emma’s words further the point, something he appreciates. Insights - Stream of Consciousness -Was there ever a concrete answer as to who drew the Milah drawing? Was it Killian? Milah herself? Like one of the people at theme park who paints people? -SMEE!! So by this point, is Smee Killian’s first mate or is he still just a regular crew member? Also, got to hand it to Smee for his faith in Killian. Smee’s a scared dude, so to see him with so much resolve in his voice as he tells Killian that they’ll avenge Milah, it’s so much bigger of a moment! -I didn’t realize how closely this episode borders on child trafficking until now! Dark. -I’ll never quite be over the way Bae’s eyes pop when he tells someone what happened to his father. Powerful! -It’s great seeing Killian piece together the puzzle that’s this new boy and immediately making a plan upon realizing just who he is. -It’s so creepy seeing how having only Lacey to depend on as a morality chain can corrupt Rumple so much. Hurting Henry to save himself at the very least was a point he was torn on when he first found Neal and learned the truth about his and Henry’s relation. But as he sees Henry on the swing, he’s so close to giving in and killing Henry. (Okay, someone write a dark ass fic where this happens. Henry dies and Emma goes crazy trying to figure out if his death was an accident or not. Can you IMAGINE the final confrontation there?!) Also, I refuse to believe it’s a coincidence that it’s David that snaps him out of it. Sheep Bros to the rescue! -Colin acts that last scene in the mine so freakin’ well! Like, less than three minutes later, that’s gonna turn out to be horseshit, but he sells that so believably! -I will say, while I don’t like a lot of platitudes this season, I’m cool with Henry’s “work together” schtick. -David, that was an amazing punch! XD -WHAT AN EXCELLENT REGAL BELIEVER SCENE! Once again, Regina apologizes to Henry and it’s very sincere. She’s not blaming anyone and is saying that it’s she who failed to live up to his standards. And Henry’s reaction does not absolve her, but lets her know that he loves her. THAT is GOOD! -”The things we do for our children.” This is kind of a weird line. -I love how it’s so obvious that this Pan is “him” and they are doing every backflip to make this a killer twist. -Oh My God! Felix is trying to be so menacing and it is just the HAMMIEST thing ever! XD I love it! It’s not appropriate at all to the mood they’re setting, but fuck it! I love it! -Grumpy, that is the best cup I have ever seen! I can’t even blame you for taking it back for Sneezy (And then maybe channel your inner-Stealthy and take it for yourself)! -I’ve been trying to do a count of the number of men in KIllian’s crew. So far, I’ve seen at most six pirates (Killian and Smee included). Does anyone have a better count? -Left is port, right is starboard. I don’t know why, but I always forget it. Hopefully, Captain Hook will be able to help me remember! -It’s interesting to me how Killian, even when he was just using Bae, used a real and vulnerable part of his life to relate to him. It’s great insight into Killian’s life and a subtle nudge in the direction of Killian coming to care for Bae even before the truly touching moment on the scene hits. -I do have to wonder, why does Killian want to live so badly? During “The Outsider,” Killian was more than willing to die so that he could return to Milah, but he wouldn’t have even killed Rumple then (though one could argue that he’d at least leave a black mark on Rumple and Belle’s relationship). Here, he’d be killing Rumple and there’s no sign he care about saving anyone else. -”I’m not your mate.” Give it a season, Davey! -Emma and Regina work brilliantly together here. There’s such a softness to Regina sacrifice and the way Emma tries to fight against what looks to be the inevitable. It’s a great testament to their dynamic. -Wow! The CG for the destruction of Storybrooke is awful! XD -Farewell, Lacey. I hardly knew ye. -Snow, that is not all of Storybrooke. That’s not even a quarter of Storybrooke. There should be a giant ass crowd of people, not just your besties! -The moment when Bae is told the truth of his mother by Killian is so powerful! There’s so much rage, passion, and love, all of it left on on the floor in the scene. -”I’ll track them down in Hell if I have to.” Granted it’s not regarding the same character, but give it a few seasons, Emma! -”There’s no way. I spent a lifetime trying to cross worlds to find my son.” Hindsight makes that line utterly hysterical! -Rumple! Let Belle help! Get some other stooge to cast the protection spell! Belle’s such a good tracker! -Why is this goodbye making me flashforward to Belle’s death?! *bawls* -GOLDEN HOOK WORKING TOGETHER!!! That look they exchange as they understand the map’s destination! YES! I’M FILLED WITH THE POWER OF YESSSSSS! Arcs - How are These Storylines Progressing? Regina’s Redemption - Regina’s redemption was handled masterfully in this episode. The focus of it was put on Henry. As the inevitability of the end hits her, all she can and does focus on is keeping Henry alive. But that’s not all. Her acceptance of ehr bad reputation being her own fault goes a long way towards washing away the exasperation from the last few episodes away. Her sacrifice works on every level, reinfusing sympathy into Regina without it feeling out of character because of the sharp focus on Henry. Rumple’s Redemption - So like usual, Rumple takes one step back and one step forward, and I felt that it mostly worked. I say mostly because I don’t really get how Lacey attempting to use Bae’s shawl is the turning point for Rumple using the memory potion on Lacey. It’s not like Lacey used the shawl maliciously and she even apologized for it. Was it so she could help him grieve? If so, I wish it came across better. That said, I like the effect that Lacey has been corrupting Rumple, but he realizes that he both needs Belle in her real state and that his thoughts of murdering Henry are awful and need to be shunted. At the same time, he’s not willing to lend a finger to help with the end of the world. Killian’s Redemption - What’s interesting to me is how early on in this episode, Killian is pointed at for not believing in something by Tamara, and when he does turn, Killian himself is one of the most belief-heavy people on the show! Additionally, in the flashback, Killian is so belief-heavy, believing that he can get his revenge on the Dark One and later that he and Bae can fill the empty holes in their hearts. But aside from that, Killian’s turn around is actually pretty simply set up for a sympathetic character. First, it comes through in the decision to go to the heroes to help stop the diamond, knowing they’re more effective. Second, it’s of course the decision to turn his ship around. It represents Killian’s decision to start caring again, allowing himself in a way to be reborn. Emma Accepting Her Parents - “Mom...Dad…” ...Do I even need to say any more? ...Well, apart from the fact that it’s a great closing out of the arc in the beginning of the season, it’s also a PHENOMENAL setup for the events of Season 3. Greg and Tamara - Greg and Tamara kind of get stupid in this finale upon revealing that they don’t know who runs the home office and all the deflectation that takes place when Killian questions them. Really? A group of people who supposedly value science over magic wouldn’t ask who their boss is? Favorite Dynamic Emma and Regina - Emma and Regina are amazing to watch. The episode doesn’t pretend that they’re friends or even that they like each other all that much, but that their bond over Henry is powerful enough that they can overcome those facts and at least start in that direction. For the first time, I feel these two come together as real mothers. They act in Henry’s best interests and that includes saving the other, being honest to Henry, and portraying the other in a good light. Darker Elements (TW: Mention of Child Trafficking) I’ve seen it be said that Killian’s decision to abandon Baelfire was the most evil moment of his life. While I’m not sure how much I believe that, I must point out how this is as close to child trafficking as OUAT can ever get without outright saying it, and that is fucking dark. While trying to examine my own feelings on the issue, I think in terms of the show, because of the fantastical distance of the child trafficking being conducted in an equally fantastical way by a pirate with a hook for a hand and a set of children in cloaks putting a boy in a dinghy to take him to Peter Pan, it’s different than other instances of Darker Elements that I’ve already touched on. If a woman is assaulted or someone is raped by deception, the resonance with the treatment of women and the realities of sexual assault, especially in our modern political climate, makes it difficult to cloud with fantastical elements. And I’m not saying trafficking isn’t, but it’s not something a large portion of OUAT’s audience sees on a constant basis.

Writer A&E are as usual in charge of the finale, and honestly, while well delivered, I expected better. So much of the dialogue works, and that makes the fact that some of the crucial dialogue doesn’t hurt so badly. I feel like they were trying to make square pegs fit in round holes when they talk about things like Killian choosing to be alone and how kiling Cora was easy and and how Rumple decides to turn back Belle because Lacey accidentally used Bae’s shawl as a napkin. it almost overshadows the genuinely good dialogue in other places and I feel like with another draft, those problems would either be minimized or non existent. It pains me how this episode reminds me in a lot of respects more of “The Heart is a Lonely Hunter” (My current least favorite episode of the series) than some of their better episodes like “Broken.” Rating 8/10. I’ve been torn on ratings before, but never quite like this. So much of the Season 2 finale does work, but it does have failings and they chip away. However, I’ve gone on about some of the dialogue choices enough. Let’s talk about the good stuff. This episode is a good culmination point for so many of the arcs started and presents a good jumping off point for them to be furthered in the next season. It’s entertaining to watch emotionally resonates where it counts. It’s dark, but optimistic and has that Once-y feel! Flip My Ship - Home of All Things “Shippy Goodness” Swan Fire - We get to see some pretty sad and yet hopeful Swan Fire stuff. Emma is barely able to mourn Neal’s loss, but when she tells Henry and Killian the truth, you really feel the grief she’s going through. And then Neal’s alive! Swan Queen - It was so great seeing Emma and Regina working together! You really feel for the emotional bond they’ve formed as they fight off the diamond and it’s gotta be said that there’s a serious weight to the fact that the two of them together managed to fight off something that neither thought possible. Captain Swan - I feel like Emma and Killian really get their deserved start here. Emma not only tries to get her bean back, but tries to invite him to the hero squad with as much effort as she can given all else on her plate. And while it initially doesn’t work, Emma’s speech does find its resonance with Killian through remembering of his love for Bae. Rumbelle - My thoughts on how Rumple decided to use the potion aside, the moment where Belle comes back and they kiss is beautiful and heartwarming, as is their goodbye at the docks. Grumpy Beauty - Grumpy went out of his way as they were all gonna die to get another memory potion to restore Belle! That is so cute!!! I love this ship!!! There’s also such a real feeling of sacrifice as Rumple sees Belle off before his trip to Neverland. ()()()()()()()()() Oh My God! Season 2 is completed!!! Well, sort of! Like last season, I’m going to do my overview where I talk about everything from the quality of the season itself to the best dynamics to who was the best writer! I hope you’ll join me for it because it’s gonna be a lot of fun!

Thank you all for reading and to the fine folks at @watchingfairytales! Couldn’t have done it without you!

See you next time!

Season 2 Tally (194/220) Writer Tally for Season 2: Adam Horowitz and Edward Kitsis: (58/60)* Jane Espenson (44/50)* Andrew Chambliss and Ian Goldberg (40/50)* David Goodman (24/30)* Robert Hull (24/30)* Christine Boylan (26/30)* Kalinda Vazquez (28/30)* Daniel Thomsen (18/20)* * Indicates that their work for the season is complete Operation Rewatch Archives

[lethesomething]

okay legit question: what do you think is the difference between aizawa's disdain for heroes that choose the spotlight as opposed to stain's ideals? what differentiates them?

Hiya Nonny!

I have a short answer for you, and aVery Long answer.

Short Answer is the obvious one: Aizawadoesn’t kill. He may dislike certain people, but he will not let itcloud his judgement, and he’s never gone out of the bounds of thelaw. If you check the Vigilantes spin-off, he even shows up in thereas the stern and strict hero who is very much against that wholevigilante thing. Stain, however, does kill. Rather a lot. It’shis whole thing. It’s how he makes his point.This makes him avillain, and Aizawa a hero. But that’s probably too obvious of ananswer. So let’s get into it.

The Long Answer.

I think, and I’m sorry for putting itlike that, that you aren’t asking the right question when you saythat Aizawa has a disdain for heroes that take thespotlight.Aizawa’s best friend is Present Mic. You've… seenPresent Mic. His superpower is that he’s loud and flashy. Aizawa isalso on friendly terms with the likes Midnight and cooperates gladlywith Lemillion and that dragon lady. All big, flashy heroes.So Idon’t think it’s fair to say that Aizawa hates or feels scorn forheroes that like to be in the spotlight. No, what he hates, is thespotlight itself. Specifically, he doesn’t want that spotlight to beon him. He’s an underground hero for a reason. His fightingstyle, his quirk, they require villains to either not see him coming,or to not know what he’s planning. The shadows are his bestfriend.Going on late night tv to talk about his love life and hisfavourite food would legitimately put him and his work, hisstrategies, at risk.Canonically, what he hates is not so much theheroes, but the Media.The media’s job is, in part, to show thingsthat don’t want to be seen, and you can assume that this is one ofthe reasons he has such a hard time with them. He’s an introvertbeing pushed in the middle of the dance floor. No one is gonna have agood time until he’s back in a corner next to the punch bowl.ButI digress.Because it is true that he is shown to have issues with thatmost flashy hero of all: All Might. The two do work together, buttheir relationship is strained. Why? That’s actually not too clear.Maybe their personalities clash. They are prettyopposing, even if they both have the same goals in mind (save thechildren,mostly).So that could be it. Maybe All Might took one too many arrests from Aizawa. Maybe Aizawa is just tired of every single kid inhis class deciding on the dangerous path of a hero, because they lookup to All Might.

Now let’s look at Stain.

Stain’s backstory is that he went to a‘pay for your diploma’ type of hero school, and decided there thatall heroes are fakes. He has a very… teenager type of background,but one he seems to have stuck with.And because this is BnHA,where nothing is black and white, he has a legitimate point, even ifhe goes way beyond the correct way of bringing it across. Heroes in thisuniverse are public servants, but they’re also celebrities. Severalof them make a Lot of Money doing things like commercials. And thatsituation is less than ideal. Because why do people decide they wantto be a hero? For the fame and fortune? Or to help people?Themotivation thing is kind of a theme that runs through a lot of BnHA.That whole ‘all true heroes have found themselves running in to savesomeone before they could think about it’. It’s what got Midoriyachosen.On the flip side, you could see Endeavour’s quest to benumber one as a result of this celebrity culture. I personallybelieve that Endeavour is (or was at the start) truly in it to helppeople, but that the large, cocky, arrogant part of him just alsowants to be the very best, like no one ever was. And if not him, thenat least his offspring. This sort of thing legitimately causessuffering.

The same culture also poses questions reminiscent ofthings Hollywood, politics and the music industry struggle with. Areheroes chosen for their talents, or for their pretty face? That isliterally the issue Momo has in her intern arc.

So Stain has apoint, but because he’s basically insane, he takes it too far. Hismain victim in the story is the older Iida Tensei, and that guy (again,based on Vigilantes) is a cool dude, who puts a lot of emphasis onteamwork, and who is by all accounts a diligent, conscientious man.The guy is well known, but I don’t have the impression that he’slike… modeling or anything.The original Ingenium is, in short, one of the GoodGuys.But he’s not Good Enough for Stain. Because Stain is notjust fighting corruption or vain heroes that take up too much of thespotlight, or that spend too much time making money on the side. Hebasically wants every hero to be All Might. Utterly selfless,workaholic, no home life, dying for the cause.  Few heroesare like that, because that is a very unhealthy situation. That’s thekind of stuff that leads to burn-out, and those alcoholic divorcedcops in tropey crime dramas.You know who’s like that? Midoriya.All Might. Mirio. Also, incidentally: Aizawa, the guy who does somuch overtime that he sleeps in class and who comes to work stillcovered head to toe in bandages.But I digress (again).WhatStain wants, is for Heroes to not only be incorruptible, but to beinhuman. He has an almost childish need for the idolized heroes ofcomics and tales. Not real people with a partner and kids and dailymeals and human feelings and doubt and a sleep schedule.He is,himself, spinning an unrealistic tale. One that catches on, by the way, because inhis own blundering way, he has learned the power of imagery. His PR is amazing, even if part of it is just that one clip of him ranting goingviral.

Let’s talk about All Might andimages

(yes, I know that wasn’t the question, but bear with me)Now, the crux ofall this, and really of pretty much everything in BnHA, is AllMight.Because he’s the one that started it. The ultimate hero,the one that kicked off Celebrity Hero Culture.He did soknowingly, too. He set out to be the Symbol of Peace. That’s thetale he spun. The PR campaign he started.He needed the media forthis. He embraced them and by doing so, probably kickstarted the idea that heroes need an Image. All Might definitely knows the power of imagery: the smile,the catchphrase, that one youtube clip that keeps surfacing of himcarrying like ten people at once. It is real, he is actually likethat, but it’s also a story. It is there to scare villains andreassure the populace.It is, in a way, what made PR important forheroes. This, too, could be one of the reasons Aizawa is less of afan of All Might: that guy just made the job of hero harder by addingall the media attention, and Aizawa would be happier if it wasn’tpart of his daily life.

So where am I going with this?

Stain’sdisdain of heroes in the spotlight is pronounced, but in a way it’s acover for his very clear and very unsustainable want for 'trueheroes’. He uses it as an easily understandable (because with a grain of truth) argument for his philosophy that deems almost every hero unworthy.On the other hand, Aizawa mostly hates the spotlight itself. His reasons for being kinda grumpyaround All Might are mostly personal, and we haven’t really beengiven a full explanation of them.

Both of them, in part, rail against a wider culture of celebrity heroes, but because irony is the sweetest of all Horikoshi’s themes, the one that goes along with it the most, the one that uses imagery to his advantage, is Stain. He’s the one going viral with his philosophies. The one that is closest to the ‘true hero’ that Stain is raving about, is then Aizawa, who just wants to be left alone with his sleeping bag and his cats.

[psycho-alchemist]

Hi so first of all you seem really awesome and your blog is amazing, I always love seeing what you've reblogged on my dash. Second, I was wondering if you had any anime recommendations of like your all-time favorite animes or series you think everyone should watch? I just finished a Fullmetal Alchemist rewatch and I'd love to find some new shows to get into. Thank you!!

Oh wow thank you, that’s so sweet of you!!

Three anime everyone should watch (not including FMAB, since that’s a given and you’ve already seen it):

Steins;Gate - Not many people talk about S;G anymore, but the people who have watched it pretty much unanimously love it. It’s about a man named Okabe and his friends who discover how to send messages to the past. But in doing so, they start to change their world too much, and suddenly all of their lives are in danger. Okabe has to undo the mistakes he made to save his friends’ lives and change the world back to the way it was. It’s a really cool time travel show! From what I have seen, most people who dropped it did so because it seems to move pretty slowly at first. I actually nearly dropped it too during my first watch, but upon rewatching I noticed that there are a lot of subtle hints dropped during the “slow” episodes that something horrible and tragic is about to happen. There’s this very faint, ever-growing feeling that something isn’t right, and suddenly it’s too late to fix anything.Time travel is a very very tiny theme in media, but I love it because it’s a great opportunity for pseudo-science and angst. The helplessness a main character feels as they try to fix things in a fucked up world when no one else around him even realizes how fucked up it is? 👌🏽👌🏽👌🏽 Steins;Gate handles the angst and plot twists really well, and it also manages to avoid all the plot holes that often come with badly written time travel stories. I am usually of the mindset that if I need to wait more than 4-6 episodes for an anime to “get good,” then it’s not worth it. Steins;Gate is a very rare exception to that rule, and I think everyone should watch it!!

Barakamon - I am not a fan of children, so an anime about a misanthropic twenty-something-year-old spending a summer on a rural island with a bunch of country kids is not something I would typically even glance at. When I originally saw it on the Summer 2016 roster, I wrote it off instantly. But during the first week of the new season I had finished all my other anime, so I watched it out of pure boredom. And boy, was I FLOORED.Barakamon is a surprisingly charming and hilarious story. Handa, the main character, is relatable to the average dramatic grump like me who would prefer to stay indoors during the summer, away from the bugs and sunshine and nature in general. The children are actually realistic, unlike a lot of the children or children-passing lolis we often see in anime. They’re a tiny bit bratty and very mischievous, but it’s actually really refreshing and endearing. The situations they get themselves into are ridiculous and hilarious. And despite Handa avoiding them at first, he ends up getting very very attached to them, and them to him.I was very reluctant to like Barakamon, but the first episode completely charmed me, and every episode thereafter. The humor was rarely an overdone punchline, it was situational and felt very authentic. I still laugh a lot just thinking about some of the scenes!

Psycho Pass (season 1) - This is only regarding season 1. Don’t bother watching s2 or the movie. But Psycho Pass was a special show for me, not just because of the very fascinating world-building but because of the way it makes you think about how morality works. How do we decide what is good and what is bad? How do we determine if someone is guilty or innocent? How do we make the judgment on whether someone deserves punishment or forgiveness? Psycho Pass made me think about those questions in a way I never really had. It actually made me agree with the psychopathic villain for once, which had never happened to me beforehand. (I’m pretty black-and-white so I usually side with the good guys and hate the bad guys without questioning it.) I understood and agreed with the villain’s philosophies, and it was really intriguing to consider that anyone could become a villain if they twisted their thinking the wrong way. In addition, Psycho Pass also brings up an interesting point of what would happen if humans didn’t go through any kind of stress or hardship. It suggests that perhaps stress and trauma are...not good exactly, but perhaps essential to the human experience.In short, Psycho Pass made me think about humanity and morality in a way I never had before. Again I am only speaking for s1, since s2 and the movie fell off that trend, but s1 was a fantastic watch and perfectly fine as a standalone series.

Those are the two I recommend to everyone, regardless of what genres they prefer. Here are my other favorites: 

Haikyuu!! - If you’re a fan of sports anime, or would like to watch sports anime but don’t like the overdone sports moves, Haikyuu!! is a great watch. It’s funny, it’s inspiring, and the sports actually don’t defy the laws of physics. The characters are all very lovable and have a great dynamic.

Hunter x Hunter - If you’ve been looking for a fun action series, HxH is definitely worth it. It’s got great action and really cool storylines, and it has a fun shounen feel without being overbearingly so. It’s a pretty long one at 148 episodes, and I definitely understand how intimidating that can be, as someone who hesitates to watch even 2-cour series. But Hunter x Hunter was worth every single minute, and I cannot stress that enough. It’s so much fun to watch, the characters are so unique and interesting, and the last two arcs are Angst Central if that’s what you’re into. It’s got someone for action fans who love fluff and those who love angst, and I am so so glad I decided to watch it despite its episode count looming over my head. 

Kaichou wa Maid-sama! - If you love a good rom com, definitely check out KWMS! The animation is done in a way that brings out each of the characters’ charm and really adds to the energetic, cute feel of the show. I’ve rewatched it more times than I can count, and it never gets old!

Kimi ni Todoke - If you love rom coms but want a slow-paced romance, KnT will do that for you. It’s still really funny (first anime that made me laugh so hard I couldn’t breathe!), but the romance is slow and steady. Some people have complained that the romance is too slow, and while I won’t disagree, I think the show still did a great job showing a very shy girl slowly establishing deep relationships, both platonic and romantic, with kind people. 

Bokura wa Minna Kawaisou - Technically a rom com, but don’t expect too much romantic development! It’s more like a comedy anime with a side romantic plot. But there’s nothing wrong with that! I love the characters; they’re all super eccentric but go together perfectly. And don’t get me started on Brain Base’s gorgeous animation and the lovely soundtrack! Overall this is just a really pretty, aesthetic, feel-good fluff show. Perfect for casual laughs!

Hopefully this helps you! :) If you would like recs from one particular genre, just let me know and I’ll tell you what I like!

[luci-in-trenchcoats]

Big Bad Dean Winchester (Part 1)

Request: Hey. Could you do an Endverse Dean x Reader where the Reader is alone and one day saves Dean's life and he is super annoyed. The others invite her to stay at their camp. Dean hates the idea and hates her more because she still has a positive outlook in this messed up world. Can it be angsty, fluffy and smutty?

Big Bad Dean Winchester Masterlist

Pairing: Endverse!Dean x reader

Word Count: 4,700ish

Warnings: language, injury, slight horror themes

Terminology: Croat - A person(s) infected with the Croatoan virus, similar to what you might think of as a zombie 

A/N: My first time doing endverse!Dean. Enjoy!...

“Yes,” you said, finding a stash of old chocolate bars and medicine in someone’s kitchen cupboard. About half of it was expired but the pain killers and allergy meds were still good for another six months. This house had turned out to be a gold mine. You’d already found a sturdy hooded jacket that had a removable liner to replace your thinning one. You’d started out this whole thing out in it, now stitched so much you couldn’t tell what was original and what wasn’t anymore. 

Your backpack got an upgrade too, a nice big camping one that could hold more food and you didn’t have to worry about the bottom falling out. Not to mention these people had fuzzy wool socks. When the apocalypse hit, a lot of the small things fell to the way side so today was definitely proving to be a good day.

They had no guns, not that you needed anymore. You were running low on ammunition for your Glock and your shotgun but you could make due for a while longer before it started getting worrisome. There were other ways to deal with the Croats. This husband and wife had been, besides being pretty cute from their wedding photos on the wall, avid outdoors people and finding a knife belt that wasn’t meant for a guy twice your size was like Christmas morning. It hung through the belt loops of your jeans, the knife just behind where your thigh holster was, your shotgun crossed on your back as you made one final sweep of the house. There wasn’t any food left to scavenge and you were good on water. There was a warm looking blanket on the couch but it wouldn’t do well in the wilderness. You went over to their bookshelf, leaving the one you’d finished and grabbing a Nicholas Sparks one. Maybe it was cheesy but at least you got to end your days on a happy note. 

You slung your pack on and clipped yourself in, hand testing out your knife a few times before you opened the door, even if you knew the area was mostly clear when you came there. You stuck to the middle of the street, hand on your hip always as you looked back and forth. It was too dangerous to attempt to take one of the cars, not when you were this far in suburbia. On foot you could slip by unseen until you got to the edge of town and had more time to work on something.

You saw a green mudded up jeep on the outskirts that looked perfect for the taking. Until you realized it belonged to someone, no car in that good of condition unless it had an owner. You made it a habit not to steal unless you were crossed first. Then again, that philosophy had left you shot once, stabbed twice and with more than a few scars. It was better to find a different car and avoid the person altogether.

“Fuck!” you heard a man shout from a building half a block down. 

“Dumbass,” you mumbled, running in that direction. At this point in the game everyone knew you did not make a sound, not unless you wanted fifty Croats on you like that.

You slipped in through a side door, your knife already out as you snuck up on two Croats, putting them down before they knew what hit them. You could hear someone grunting, fighting some off from the sound of it as you made your way towards the source. You got three more before they started to notice you and you heard what sounded like a head being smacked against the pavement. The Croat nearest you grabbed your arm as you swung, hitting it square in the face as the man stopped fighting back from what you could tell. You kicked the one on your other side and sprinted over to the Croat about to bite the unconscious dirty blonde on the ground, stabbing it fast before lunging up and getting the last one.

“Hey,” you said quietly, the man mumbling but not coming out of it from the looks of it. You sighed and stretched your arms out. “Lift with your knees.”

You grabbed hold of his arm and leg, trying to carry him but stumbling straight onto your face. You knew you didn’t have time for this, trying again and getting to your feet, crouching to get his bag nearby on the floor as you slowly made your way back to the jeep you assumed was his.

“Shit, you owe me a back massage after this buddy,” you said with a smile, knowing the adrenaline was the only thing helping you lift so much weight. You had to duck behind a car near the jeep, hearing the other Croats in the area start to converge on the building you were just in. You got the guy in his passenger seat and both your bags in the back. You pulled away quietly and didn’t stop to check him out until you were a few miles down the highway, free from anyone and anything. 

There was a first aid kit in his glove box as you stitched his cut and wrapped up his head, pulling his seatbelt on before fishing around and finding a map. There was a mark for “Camp” in what looked like one of the national parks. You’d heard rumors of a place like that, a safe place but no one seemed to know exactly where.

“Let’s get you home.”

When you pulled up to the front gate, you were not expecting walls that high or sturdy looking. Or to see a red dot on your chest as someone barked for you to turn off the jeep and get out.

“Hey so, I saved this guy and I think he’s from here? If not, that’s cool,” you said, holding up your hands as a few people opened up the gate. One of them slid into the jeep and drove it inside, someone else pointing for you to come with them as the gates closed behind you. There was a difference being in there, just in the air. It felt safe and you couldn’t help but smile.

“Give us your weapons,” said someone and you raised an eyebrow. “Now.”

“Just because the world ended didn’t mean manners did,” you said.

“Give us your weapons, please,” said the man. You undid your knife belt and pulled off your shotgun and thigh holster. You pulled the one out of your shoe and gave him a smile. “Put the lady’s things in quarantine until we get her story.”

“Benny, I got this,” said a shorter man. “Walk with me?” he said to you, motioning you to follow through the parking lot of the once state park, now an impromptu motor pool from the looks of it.

“Your guy got smacked around by a Croat pretty hard. He’s been out for about thirty minutes, mumbling sometimes when he comes close to waking up. I cleaned and stitched him. No other injuries from what I can tell,” you said to Benny. “If you have a doctor they might want to know.”

“Thanks,” he said a hair softer, jogging off to catch up with where you could see they were moving the guy you’d saved on a stretcher down a road, their camp just down a little ways you guessed.

“I’m Chuck,” said the short man, reaching out to shake your hand.

“Y/N. I hope it’s nice to meet you, Chuck,” you said, giving him a friendly smile he returned.

“Well you saved the boss so it’s very nice to meet you, Y/N,” said Chuck.

“The boss?” you asked, Chuck nodding his head.

“Yup. Dean Winchester. He’s our leader around here, runs everything. I’m his second in command. I’m more the business side while he does tactical if that makes any sense,” said Chuck. “What happened out there? Dean doesn’t make mistakes.”

“I just heard the dude yelling and went in the building to find about six or seven Croats on him. I’m sure he could have handled it but he was half conscious when I got there so...” you said, shrugging your arms, looking around at the park as Chuck slowed his walk before heading down the road. “If you give me my stuff back, I’ll leave. I’m not in the mood to start a fight.”

“You don’t want anything in return for saving Dean?” asked Chuck. You shook your head.

“Humans look out for other humans. Or at least we should. It’s not right to take advantage of a situation like that,” you said, Chuck staring at you strangely. 

“Dean’s the kind of guy that would take that as a weakness you know,” said Chuck.

“Well I’m not Dean. I’m Y/N and I don’t think the world has to be as bad a place as everyone makes it out to be. If being a good person is weakness then I’m weak,” you said. “Am I allowed to go, Chuck?”

“Do you have a camp?” he asked. You shook your head and he smiled. “Do you have anyone?”

“I used to have a dog, Huxley. A couple Croats got him,” you said. “Always figured he’d get hit by a car or something. He wasn’t the smartest but he was a good dog, loyal and-”

“You’re not a spy, not someone from that Crooked group, right?” asked Chuck.

“No. I wouldn’t call myself their biggest fan,” you said, pulling your jacket and shirt away to show a scar. “Big guy tried to bring me back to their camp once. I didn’t exactly like the way he phrased it so he shot me.”

“You could be lying about that scar,” said Chuck.

“Alright. I could be lying. Your options are to either let me leave with my stuff or kill me because you don’t trust me. Either way, fate’s out of my hands now. No use in getting upset about it,” you said, Chuck tilting his head at you. “I mean obvioulsy don’t kill me. I won’t be so nice if you try to.”

“Why aren’t you jaded if you’ve been on the road alone so long? You’re a bit of an odd one,” he said.

“I don’t know. It must be all the romance novels sticking with me,” you joked. “I still have hope I guess. Or as Dean would say I have weakness.”

“Come with me, I want to introduce you to some people.”

“So, Y/N, do you want to stay on?” asked Bobby. You were surprised when Chuck brought you to a room full of people, each of them asking you different things from where you grew up to the worst action you’d seen. “We’d normally confer with Dean but he’s being a lazy ass in his bed.”

“He got hurt,” you said, taking a second to realize he was only joking. “Um, I don’t know, I haven’t been in a group since everything started really. My first one got cleared out that first week and I’ve been on my own since then.”

“It’s been over a year. That’s a long time to be by yourself,” said Benny. “We don’t bite.”

“I...I don’t know. What can I do? I’m just another mouth to feed and body to take up space. I don’t think it’s a good idea,” you said, not sure why you were pushing them away when all you’d been looking for was a place to settle down for the past year.

“You’ll be assigned a job,” said Chuck. “Everyone has one apart from the kids. You have a wide skill set so Dean’ll probably put you on whatever kind of detail you want really. You contribute and we take it one day at a time. Come on, you know you want to. You’ve been smiling the second you stepped foot in here. We could use that around here.”

“I guess I can stay,” you said. “But I told you before, I don’t want anything for helping Dean. Just treat me like anyone else.”

“Whatever you want,” said Chuck. “I’ll show you around and by the time we’re done, hopefully Dean’ll be in the mood to talk.”

Chuck returned your belongings to you as he walked you around to the front service cabin, the map on the wall showing they’d secured about a third of it and even had some domestication of the land going on near the river that ran through the park. There were about fifty people there, some families but mostly individuals that had come along the way. When Chuck showed you your own cabin, you frowned.

“You said I wasn’t being treated special. I should get bunked up with someone,” you said.

“If you want a roommate, we can put you on the list but we don’t force people together unless we run out of cabins and we haven’t yet. It’s not Caesar’s Palace but it’ll do,” said Chuck, opening the door to show you the small space. The bed was tucked up against the wall, a small kitchenette in the corner, a wood burning fireplace and small love seat in the other, a bathroom behind a door taking up the remaining space.

“I get my own bathroom?” you said, Chuck nodding.

“There’s no hot water, it comes straight from the river but we don’t worry about getting thirsty here,” said Chuck, checking his watch. “Dean should be ready for visitors by now after getting debriefed. Want to go say hi?”

“Sure,” you said, following Chuck to Dean’s cabin, a bit isolated from everyone else, Chuck knocking on the door and coming inside to find Dean swallowing down a big glass of water with a gulp. 

“Dean this is-”

“Excuse me but since when do we invite people to stay without my say so?” he said, shooting daggers at Chuck and then you. “We have rules for a fucking reason, Chuck.”

“Y/N did save you Dean. That should count for-”

“Get out. I want to talk to her. Alone,” said Dean, Chuck saying he’d be at the front cabin for when you were finished. Dean pulled out a chair from his table and put it in the middle of the room. “Sit.”

You weren’t a fan of his grumpiness but did as told. Maybe he was having some PTSD after what happened earlier and-

“I’ve heard you’re just a little ray of sunshine around here,” said Dean, staring down at you, arms crossed. “Coming in and saving the day.”

“I’m sorry but are you mad at me for saving your life?” you asked, Dean bending down to get in your face.

“I have a reputation around here and it certainly isn’t the nice guy. So yeah, I got a problem with a little mutt off the street coming into my house uninvited,” said Dean. You didn’t have a comeback for that, instead Dean just giving you a dark smirk as you glanced at your lap. “But you’re already in and it doesn’t look good if I throw you out so puppy gets to stay. Good for you.”

“Why are you being so mean?” you asked. “I didn’t do anything but-”

“Do not talk back to me. I might not have a reason to get rid of you but there are plenty of rules around here and if you break even one, I’ll dump your ass out in the middle of nowhere so fast you’ll realize how nice I’m being right now,” he said, glaring at you.

“You don’t like that I’m kind, do you,” you said, looking up to see dark green eyes searching yours.

“How the hell something like you made it this long I have no idea. We live in the real world here. People understand that today might be their last day in this hell hole and you’re here for an hour and people are making fucking weekend plans like the world is suddenly full of rainbows and unicorns. So shove that shit down and get with the program, sweetheart,” said Dean.

“Sounds to me like you with all your big walls and guns are the scared one, not me,” you said, Dean walking behind you and grabbing a notebook, walking to the counter and flipping through it.

“What’s your last name?” he asked, grabbing a pencil. “Don’t make me ask twice.”

“Y/L/N. Y/N Y/L/N,” you said, Dean jotting it down and shutting the book.

“Y/N, you’re on sanitation duty. Second and third shifts to start,” said Dean. 

“What’s that?” you asked, not thrilled with having to work all night but knowing what he was up to already.

“Clean up around camp and composting. Laundry duty for the fighters. Cleaning the weapons. Cleaning the trucks. You see anything that’s dirty? You clean it,” he said, wearing a frown.

“Does that include people’s cabins?” you asked, Dean’s hard gaze almost breaking for a moment.

“No. People are responsible for cleaning their own cabins. You start work at 4 pm. You get an hour of break time to use as you please. You’re expected to keep your own cabin clean and-”

“I’m going to prove you wrong you know,” you said, standing up and stretching.

“Excuse me?” he asked, shock on his face.

“You’re going to try and break me. I get it but it ain’t going to work babe. You’ll be wearing a smile long before mine goes away,” you said. You started to leave as you heard him move across the room and spin you around.

“Where the hell are you going?” he demanded, eyes like fire when you gave him a smirk.

“Well unless the clock on your wall is wrong, I have work in twenty minutes. I should go settle in and eat something. Wouldn’t want to make the boss unhappy be being late on my first day, would I?” you teased, patting Dean on the chest. “Later Dean.”

You caught sight of Dean a few hours later as he munched on a bean burrito that they were making for dinner, sliding in to take a spot across from him.

“Did you know that Chuck said we don’t have a third shift for sanitation? We don’t have a third shift for anything beside security which is already maxed out. Isn’t that funny?” you asked, giving Dean a big smile.

“Well you caught me. Doesn’t mean you’re off sanitation,” said Dean.

“Oh I actually like it,” you said, Dean nearly choking on his food.

“You like it? You like cleaning?” asked Dean.

“I like helping. I’d like any job really,” you said, Dean growling under his breath. “How’s your head? You aren’t allowed to sleep tonight with the-”

“Yes I’ve had a concussion before, I know the drill,” he said. “Go away before I come up with a new assignment for you.”

“Is the trying to break me thing not working out for you?” you asked, Dean ripping your plate away, taking a bite of your food before shoving it back. “You know that’s reportable. I could have you thrown out for that severe violation.”

“You are so freaking...I wish that Croat had killed me so I wouldn’t have to be anywhere near your annoying ass,” said Dean, getting up to leave. You didn’t let his comment bother you until you were lying down in your bed just after midnight, doing your best to shove it to the back of your mind. He wasn’t going to get you down.

You woke up to a loud knocking on your door, just after seven. You trudged over to find Dean on the other side, looking you up and down, half asleep in your clothes.

“You’re off sanitation. I need ‘backup’ on a scavenge mission apparently. Chuck won’t let me leave without any,” said Dean. 

“And you willingly want to bring someone you openly hate?” you asked, cocking your head.

“Rather you than one of my friends. If I have to shoot you I won’t even bat an eye,” said Dean.

“You know how to make a girl feel special,” you said, turning around to grab your boots. “Give me ten minutes.”

“Be at the mess hall in five,” he said. You pulled on your shoes and used the bathroom quickly, tidying up your bed before throwing on your thigh holster and knife belt, throwing some water in your empty backpack and jogging to meet up with Dean before he got more pissed.

“Bean burritos again?” you asked, Dean raising an eyebrow at you as you walked in for an early breakfast.

“We eat a lot of bean burritos around here,” he said. “Eat while we walk. I want to be out of here soon.”

You munched down breakfast as you went to keep up with him, Dean getting flack from Benny when he tried to take the keys.

“Seriously? I’m fine,” said Dean.

“And you haven’t slept in forever. Y/N’s driving or you’re not heading out boss. Doctor’s orders,” said Benny.

“You’re not the fucking doctor, dip shit. Cas is, ” said Dean, grumpily getting into the passenger seat.

“Take whatever’s shoved up your ass this morning out. You’re with a lady. Cute one too,” said Benny to Dean through the window. “I think she even likes you. Hasn’t slapped you in the face yet.”

“Does that happen often?” you asked, Benny nodding, Dean pointing for you to get in the truck.

“Dean’s good for a lay but not much else from what we’ve heard,” teased Benny.

“Watch it or I’ll put you back on medical duty. You know how much you fucking hate blood,” said Dean, Benny rolling his eyes.

“Watch this one,” said Benny, shutting Dean’s door. “He’s a softie if you can get to know him. At least he used to be one before the Croats took over.”

“If I can get him to smile, I’ll call that a win,” you said, Benny giving one in return.

“Told him we needed someone like you around here. Better get going before boss man hot wire’s his own truck,” said Benny as you ran around to the other side and got in.

“Are you girls done gossiping?” said Dean crossing his arms.

“Where are we headed captain?” you joked, Dean rolling his eyes.

“A neighborhood about twenty miles from here. Chuck said you found hunting provisions in a house. We could use what you didn’t take,” said Dean.

“We shouldn’t take a truck in there. It’s too-”

“I know that. We’ll cut through the woods, piece mail supplies back to the truck. If that house was relatively untouched that neighborhood probably is too,” said Dean.

“Why haven’t you ever gone there? I was just passing through but it seems close to camp,” you said, Dean shaking his head.

“It’s been a hot spot for the past year. The Croats have spread out enough it’s not as bad to go in now. I need you on your best game. If it might be useful, bag it,” he said. You raised an eyebrow and he sighed. “I don’t have to teach you to scavenge unlike some of them. No talking out there. You get separated, make your way back to camp.”

“Understood, boss,” you said, the rest of the thirty minute drive done in silence. 

You got the house you’d originally gone through cleared out and in the truck with relative ease, Dean pointing out for you to search a colonial while he took a ranch across the street. You found some more useful supplies and were going through your second run of the basement when you heard the stairs creak. You glanced around, knife out, stairs creaking again, a sneaker appearing that made you swear under your breath. There was another set of shoes and then another and another, moving too groggily to be humans. There was no where to go in the small space as you hid behind some shelves, at least ten down there now and more on the way. One tilted it’s head and sniffed, craning it’s neck in your direction and you knew you were screwed.

You got at least eight shots off, clearing away a mess of them as more poured down the stairs, backing you into a corner, trapped there. You got another bunch before you had to reload, the basement filling up with bodies fast as you really had no where to turn to. When you pulled the trigger and it clicked empty you grabbed your knife, swiping away at the ones closest, the Croats too near now as you felt a few hands grabbing, one shoving as you heard more than felt your skull hit the metal shelf. You slumped down, dropping your knife, unable to see anything as the blinding pain made you lose track of everything. By the time you got hold of the blade again, hands were tearing at your backpack and you waited for them to start doing the same to you.

Instead seven very clear rounds shot out, the hands on you going limp, one dragging you up a few moments later and pulling you up the stairs fast. You had no idea if you were even inside anymore, the hand twisting and tugging and pulling until you were being forced up more stairs and then another flight, a loud thud as something was pulled shut. You forced your eyes open, in an attic of some sort with Dean locking the pull down stairs in place, turning around to see you trying to stand.

“Sit down,” he said, going to the window and looking outside. “We’re stuck here until they clear out. Probably all night from the looks of it.”

“What?” you asked, a hand on your head where it felt warm and sticky. Dean picked you up and set you down in the light, ripping off your backpack as he moved your hair to see the gash there. Dean looked you over twice before determining you hadn’t been bit, wrapping a bandana around your head as a makeshift bandage until you could get to camp. “Where’d they come from?”

“No idea. They came running once they heard the shots,” said Dean. 

“I’m surprised,” you said, wincing but giving Dean a smile.

“Trust me. I didn’t expect you to be that good of a shot either,” he said.

“I’m surprised you didn’t leave me there considering you hate me and all,” you said. You were fully expecting a wise crack back, another round of him spewing nasty things at you. Not the hurt green eyes that were staring at your own.

“You’re a member of the camp. We look out for each other. Out here, you’re my responsibility. I don’t leave people to die, especially not like that,” said Dean. You opened your mouth to speak but he shook his head. “Stay awake. Keep an eye on the street. We’ll head back to the truck when there’s a break.”

“Dean I’m sorry for-”

“Watch the street, Y/N,” said Dean, moving to sit on the other side of the attic, back turned to you. You would have groaned if you didn’t think it’d make him more angry. 

“Thank you...for saving me,” you said.

“We’re even now,” he said, your hands shaking some. It’d been a while since you had that close of a call. Not since Huxley gave you the chance to get away. Even then that stupid dog had a big smile on it’s face as it saved you. You wondered when the last time Dean actually smiled was. Not out of some anger or sarcasm or to be dangerous. Something happy and kind. “I said watch the street, not your lap.”

“Yes sir,” you said, lifting your head.

As soon as you were able to, maybe you should get out of there before Dean sucked all the joy from your life too.

A/N: Read Part 2 here!

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[kentonramsey]

How to Improve Your Home Office, According to a Chic Sock Designer

Have you signed up for MR Thoughtline yet? It’s Man Repeller’s new text-based service that lights up phone screens with good bits from around the internet, opportunities to chat with cool people, and digital recesses to help your mind take a break from the news in favor of a recipe, physical activity or, trust us, very useful WFH outfit ideas. Subscribe here.

If this story had a doormat, it would say, “THE REST IS SEARCH HISTORY,” and you might ask where I bought it. Welcome. Take a seat. Would you like something to drink? And would you like to hear the whole story of how I tracked down the Murano glass in which your drink is served? If so, you have come to the right place.

The Rest Is Search History stems from my inherent nosiness: I want to hear about other peoples’ hyper-specific search terms, guarded like sapphires at the Smithsonian, their laborious and surprising journeys down various shopping rabbit holes, and the elaborate shopping strategies they’ve honed over time. This week’s theme is homewares (yesterday, we tracked down Dakota Johnson’s tea set!), and today’s guest is a woman of exquisite taste, Jenni Lee, the sock designer behind Comme Si.

Jenni Lee, Founder & CEO of Comme Si

Your shopping rabbit hole: A floor lamp for my “home office.”

During the day, my apartment gets great natural light through our skylights—our reward for living on the top floor of a walkup—but I’ve been working irregular hours lately (my work day is more spaced out because of my corona feeding schedule), and I want to find a good floor lamp.

Is it possible to be *allergic* to overhead light? Overhead light sparks a visceral reaction from me, and I’m surprised that I don’t own a floor lamp already.

Can you walk me through what going down this rabbit hole entails? For context, my “home office” = my dining/living/sitting/TV room. Our walnut dining table is now a shared desk, and I’ve swapped our matching dining chairs—which need to be replaced—another rabbit hole for another day—with two Herman Miller Cosm chairs that I brought over from my office when it became clear that quarantine would be happening.

I have a logical/methodical approach to making purchase decisions, guided by a Vitruvius + Kondo philosophy: Is it beautiful, substantial, and useful? Does it bring me joy? This will be no different.

View this post on Instagram

Our founder @definiteleejenni on the @hermanmiller Eames shell chair, business as usual.

A post shared by Comme Si (@commesi) on Mar 13, 2020 at 4:03pm PDT

It starts with my dream list: What would I buy if budget was not an issue? From there, I try to determine whether it’s worth a) waiting and saving for said dream item (I’ll be saving for an Ettore Sottsass Ultrafagola mirror for years), b) finding an alternative that’s more affordable and serves as a replacement for the dream item, or c) buying something that’s cheap and gets the job done, but isn’t for keeps.

My rabbit hole begins via “digital moodboarding,” a.k.a. Pinterest. I have a pre-existing board for interior inspiration, where I specifically hone in on images with lamps. Before I know it, I’m rapidly clicking to add more images to the board (the “More ideas” feature is very conducive to Alice-ing down the hole). Pinterest reminds me of collecting Pokémon and Sailor Moon trading cards—you see so many things, you want to hurry and catch them all, lest you lose them.

Looking at the board, I realize that lamps have distinct categories by shape, and I need to determine which shape is right for my space.

I try to imagine the personality of the lamp and what the lamp says about me. Does my floor lamp hinge at its midpoint, in the shape of a V? It’s reminiscent of the Pixar lamp, but at five feet tall, it’s not as cute. Do I like the slender sloping body of a U-shaped lamp? Am I a lampshade person? Is it just me or does it feel weird when a lamp with a shade is shorter than you when you’re standing up? Should the lamp be a conversation starter, or should it blend into the background? Can you tell that my moon is in Virgo yet?

On my dream list is a Frances Alder Elkins street lamp, either as a singleton or as a pair. Rather than investing in lamps as art, it seems that going with a well-designed, affordable option is the way to go.

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I Google and Pinterest-search “interior design best lamps,” “floor lamps for designers,” “floor lamp designers” in separate tabs. I open each search result in a new tab, and it takes me to specific design sites like Flos, and retailer sites like Chairish, Lampsplus.com, Ylighting.com, and 1stdibs. Before I know it, I’m also on the desktop version of Instagram, looking through #floorlamps.

I finally narrow my choices down to two options that are artful but still require a few more days of ruminating: the Muller Van Severen standing lamp and a Flos IC Lights F floor lamp.

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What ultimately satiates the quest? As I mark the ideal height of a lamp on the wall, I look up at my framed art and prints and decide that the wall needs a refresh, too. I’ve been staring at the same William Eggleston/Untitled (cocktail on airplane) print for too long. It just reminds me of how much I miss traveling, and inspires me to make another cocktail, for which I do not need additional inspiration.

About six months ago, on a late-night whim, I purchased a vintage Rolex print ad with Yo Yo Ma, and now think that it would look better as a pair or trio of similar-sized frames on the wall. I search eBay and Etsy for vintage print ads: Rolex, Range Rover, Olympics. There’s something aspirational, romantic, and nostalgic about them. I decide to check out with a Chris Evert Rolex ad, and immediately feel a sense of achievement.

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I’m going to sleep on the lamp decision, but I’d invested so much time researching and eye-shopping on the internet it seems wrong to not have something to show for it. It’s kind of like spending hours trying on Manolos and Chanels in Barneys (RIP) and leaving with a $30 hand cream on your way out, because you feel you should leave with something in hand.

Graphics by Lorenza Centi.

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[trenttrendspotter]

7 Top Spa-Wellness Trends

By Nancy Trent

The overarching theme at the September 2019 ISPA (International Spa Association) Conference, held in Las Vegas, was “evolution.” This is the most appropriate description for what the spa industry is experiencing. As the founder of the leading wellness PR firm, I’ve been attending ISPA since it was established. At that time, spas were wrestling with various identities…yoga retreats, fat farms and places to heal. Today, spa has evolved into an accessible place of wellness. My personal philosophy and the mission of my firm is to make wellness applicable to every room of the home or office, every member of the family and every time of day. It was satisfying to see that reflected at ISPA this year, as well as at the ISPA media event prior to the show, where spas showcased the products, services and equipment they feature. A look at the seven trends that took center stage at the show:

CBD

Part of that evolution is spa’s role in the much anticipated, here-to-stay CBD industry. According to the newest 2019 ISPA U.S. Spa Industry Study, the use of cannabidiol (CBD) was the biggest trend in the industry. This study reveals that almost one in five spas has a CBD offering. “What is more interesting is that the study shows that 56% of spas stated they would be adding CBD to their spas in the next two years,” said ISPA President Lynne McNees. “If these numbers ring true, almost 75% of all spas in the U.S. will offer CBD treatments by the end of 2020. It’s incredible how quickly this trend has taken hold in just a few short years. We expect to see many of the traditional brands launch CBD lines to complement their current products.”  

While CBD is still in its infancy at the spa, the spa industry is going to become a place of education for it, as it has been for salt and cryotherapy. “The spa experience is so important to health and well-being, and it truly helps people stay centered, whether they are stay-at-home moms, business executives, athletes, students or travelers,” said Julie Duncan, President and Co-Owner of SPAFLASH.    

Spa-lovers looking to save time and money on locating salon/spa, and wellness experiences have a new resource at their fingertips, with SPAFLASH, a new consumer shopping website. SPAFLASH a site that is free to join, provides consumers with access to appointment availability, events, value-added experiences, and packages on salon/spa and wellness services throughout greater Dallas/Fort Worth.  It will be now be launching in more states and cities throughout the U.S.

Salt

The biggest spa trend prior to CBD was salt, which has been popping up in new spa spaces in different ways such as salt beds, rooms, lamps and treatments.  “This is a trend [that is here] to stay as salt has so many benefits to offer through detoxification, calming and glowing skin,” said Duncan.

Integrative/functional medicine

Spas are a showroom for wellness. “Carillon Miami Wellness Resort is attracting like-minded partners who want to be a part of the wellness evolution,” said VP of Spa Operations and Co-General Manager, Tammy Pahel. This year, Dr. Vladimir Turovskiy joined Carillion Miami to lead the resort’s new Oriental Medicine division so guests can enhance their well-being with integrative/functional medicine evaluations and oriental medicine diagnoses. Highlights on this spa menu now include popular treatments such as Infrared Sauna with Himalayan Salt, Salt Float Bath Therapy, and Cryoskin slimming and toning. The spa also partnered with Italian wellness brand LEMI, which outfitted the spa with the latest cutting-edge tech including color therapy and a Crystal Quartz Massage Bed. They also have what is now a muscle recovery circuit, which is used mostly by athletes and great for anyone who seeks recovery and relief.

Wellness jewelry

Another emerging category spotted by Duncan is jewelry. “Jewelry that is meaningful and makes your heart smile is representing up to 30% of fashion merchants product mix.”  

HiChi Energy Jewelry, designed to protect, elevate and rejuvenate the wearer, had great success at the show, as did River and Sky, two great California brands.

Slow fashion

Spas are becoming a more popular purveyor of fashion in general, and athleisure is right there to slip into. “Spiritual Gangster and Terez is like a uniform for me,” said Duncan.  “People are looking for fashionable, comfortable clothing that has meaning, including a story to tell.”

River & Sky is a good example of spa fashion done well, leading the movement from fast fashion back to slow fashion.  Founder Michael Keefer said, “It’s getting easier for companies to source sustainable fabrics and that’s great because landfills with polyester aren’t going away. Retail customers feel good about it.”  

Farm-to-table

Spa goers also expect to experience slow food.  At the Woodstock Inn & Resort in Vermont where Michelle Adams Sommerville is spa director, most of what guests experience is homegrown. “We’re connecting to animals, nature and land, that is where wellness is going,” explained Sommerville. At The Woodstock Inn, farmers collaborate with the chef; the menu comes before the growing. What doesn’t come from the local historic Billings farm and heirloom garden is grown at the FarmHouse Fresh ranch in Texas.  

Farm-to-Table has been a huge trend in the food industry for years, but in recent times, there has been a need for it in the spa scene as well. Farm-to-Treatment is a trend that FarmHouse Fresh has pioneered and one that’s not going anywhere. People care so much about what they put into their bodies that it only makes sense to put freshly harvested ingredients on our skin (our largest organ) which absorbs 60% of products into your bloodstream.  Fresh extracts transform skin, and when they are grown on local U.S. farms—cucumbers, kale, amaranth, tomatoes—they can be harvested, washed and extracted in hours to ensure vitamins are at their peak.  

Male-driven goods

ISPA’s Consumer Snapshot Study revealed that men now make up almost half of the customers going to spas. We’ve been predicting more men will be going to the spa for a decade, and now there is evidence it’s finally happening. “The same study also found that 48% of men go to spas intending to purchase retail products. This reveals a huge opportunity for current and new product companies to launch male-driven goods that will attract this growing clientele of spa customers,” said McNeese.  

Spotted on the show floor…

We put together a list of some of the other spa trends we spotted for every member of the household.

A new shower ritual: European Spa Source is disrupting the spa industry by creating a totally brand-new category with its ShowerSpa Mist that transforms an ordinary shower into a luxurious, relaxing, aromatherapy experience, allowing you to bring the spa home with you wherever and whenever you take a shower. They’ve just added a new aromatherapy shower spray to their iconic collection and have even introduced a brand-new pillow spray. Trusted and used in spas internationally, it utilizes 100% pure, pharmaceutical-grade eucalyptus—a plant known to open airways, kill mold & bacteria, and help people absorb more oxygen, faster. The spray is then steam distilled for the ultimate steam-room experience that is filtered and chemically analyzed for consistency and quality. It’s hailed by pop star and media mogul Nicole Scherzinger as a product that’s “changed her life.”

Thermal wellness: Spa Revolutions’ Thermal Bliss Collection is the first-to-market instant-thermal wellness massage, skincare, and nail tools. With benefits like a better night’s sleep, improved blood circulation, a full deep cleanse of the body, and a stimulated immune system, I couldn’t think of a better way to spend an afternoon in any temperature. Treatments include Lava Shells massage which brings Hawaiian heat to you sans the volcano, stimulates tissue and allows ultimate relaxation to seep through. It’s also easy on the spa with no wait time or sanitation issues and better pressure points and leverage through the shell’s edge.The company also introduced the ThermaFusion Facial Mask, a one-of-a-kind moist heat-infusing mask that gives skin the hydration it craves by bringing the heat and opening up the pores without steam.  

Mostly widely known for PerfectSense Paraffin, the new standard in paraffin-based treatments with its mobile, electricity-free heating, aromatherapy, and exclusive nourishment blend formula, the company just introduced Paraffin Anywhere to nourish skin in just three-minutes flat.

Beeswax: For dry, cracked winter skin, we suggest people try BeeSpa. Developed from a secret recipe from a beekeeper’s grandmother, all-natural BeeSpa works quickly to provide relief to cracked and dry skin on your hands, feet, and everywhere in-between. Beeswax carries antiviral, anti-inflammatory, and antibacterial properties that are essential to healing and preventing dry, chapped, or cracked skin.

Probiotic skin wellness: People should be using probiotic skincare year-round. There are millions of microorganisms (a vast variety of bacteria, viruses, and fungi) currently living on your skin. Research shows that some of these microorganisms actually promote skin health, and reinforce your skin’s natural barrier against harmful bacteria, balance your skin’s pH levels, and may even protect against skin cancer. But the use of harsh facial cleansers and antibacterial products strip your skin of its “good” bacteria and other microorganisms, damaging the skin’s natural ecosystem known as your “microbiome.” As a legacy brand and leading innovator since 1871, Columbia Skincare uses prebiotics, probiotics, botanicals, and peptides in a science-backed formula that helps people heal their skin by supporting microbiome health while stimulating the natural production of collagen and hyaluronic acid to activate the skin’s natural healing process. Columbia Skincare Probiotic products are proven to speed up skin renewal, improve the cohesiveness of skin cells, reinforce the barrier, and amplify skin’s production of antibiotic-like chemicals. The strains, protein, and stem cells in Columbia Skincare products were selected based on years of research that determined these ingredients together potentiate and become a new complex, unique formulation—blending science and nature for supreme wellness and skin health. Columbia Skincare’s proprietary technology assures the efficacy as well as the safety of their products when used as recommended. Renowned dermatologist Dr. Whitney Bowe claims Columbia Skincare products are the best for “Sensitive, Irritated, and Rosacea-Prone Skin” and recommends it for use after chemical peels, laser treatments, and micro-needling, or to offset the uncomfortable effects of retinoids and exfoliants.

Fun, functional and better-for-you sun protection: Wallaroo Hat Company, the innovative Australian inspired headwear brand that combines fashion and long-lasting sun protection, featured its newest collection of hats. Carkella by Wallaroo is a private-label brand for the spa, golf, travel, and resort industries. Carkella features UPF 30+ and 50+ rated hats with interchangeable magnetic badges that are ideal for individualized branding. The Carkella line affords a new opportunity to increase brand identity with customizable hats perfect for destinations, tournaments, industry events and private parties. An embossed metal badge attaches to a hidden magnet inside the trim of each hat. The badges can be customized using any artwork, logo, or one of Carkella’s signature designs.

A lot of times people forget that you must protect the scalp from sun as well. In fact, 10% of skin cancer develops on the scalp. Scalpforce provides a reliable solution to stay safe in the outdoors with a scalp and hair spray-on tonic free of toxic ingredients.

Long hailed as the “it” eco-luxe brand, Soleil Toujours continues to revolutionize sun protection and daily skin care. Their new “no makeup” cosmetics line combines the trendy minimalist makeup look with their no-frills, all-organic sun protection formula for a face you can wear with confidence.  

No more invasions: “What started out as an attempt to reduce cellulite became a go-to for recovery. CellFit is so non-invasive it is actually enjoyable,” said co-founder Polina Levant. The technology doesn’t pull or stretch the skin in treatment, it uses compression and vibration instead. It is multipurpose and painless and can be done the same day of an event, game, runway show or red carpet. It’s full spectrum, which means it treats the entire body, including feet! The company says it helps with skin toning, lymphatic drainage, oxygenation, increase in microcirculation, reduction of cellulite and flushes out lactic acid.

Safety first: Now more than ever, business owners are taking preemptive action to prevent their companies from coming under fire for inappropriate action. Spas and massage parlors are no exception. That’s why Stay Saife developed MARIA. Their newest AI technology places MARIA, a virtual assistant, in the room to watch behavior and actions in real time through infrared light detection without recording or invading privacy issues.

An epigenetic approach to peptides: Peptides are quickly emerging as the leading ingredient in anti-aging skin regimens. HydroPeptide takes its age-defying formula one step further with the science of Epigenetics. According to the company, the skincare line is packed with powerful gene-signaling that tell genes to shape up and get glowing.

Affirmations from your feet: The concept of Stickybesocks seems pretty obvious: socks with no-slip grippers on the bottoms of each pair that make yoga, Pilates, and other forms of exercise and movement that much easier. But there’s more to it! Each pair of socks from this female-founded company comes with a daily affirmation printed on the bottom of the foot alongside the no-slip grips. So whether you want to “Be Unique,” “Be Brave,” or simply “Be You,” this brand makes sure you start your day out on the right foot.

Personal pain relief: This is an unforgettable product and another must-have spa innovation. Following a motorcycle accident, the creator of Theragun decided to build a tool that could help accelerate muscle repair and recovery. Constructed from a lifetime of chiropractic practice, the Theragun is the go-to tool for percussive therapy, which relieves tension in the body’s soft tissue to provide effective pain relief.

More from ISPA:

With all the great products and services available, the biggest issue affecting the spa industry is the shortage of qualified employees. The industry currently has over 30,000 unfilled positions with properties actively looking to increase their staffing levels to meet demand. ISPA is committed to tackling this issue by both recruiting new employees to this rewarding career path and educating spa managers on how to retain their existing employees.  

This spring, ISPA will host the ISPA Talent Symposium on April 15, 2020. This event will be the first of its kind for the industry and will highlight energetic and innovative approaches to solving workforce challenges while equipping attendees with tools to retain employees in today’s competitive marketplace. Seth Mattison, known internationally as an expert on workforce trends, generational dynamics and business strategy, will be a featured keynote at this event. “We are excited to share these new approaches to workforce development with our attendees,” shared McNees.  

The next ISPA Conference and Expo will be held at the Gaylord National, National Harbor, MD, Oct. 14-16, 2020. For more information about ISPA, its membership, initiatives and events visit experienceispa.com.

As seen in Whole Foods Magazine