#sanji overcompensates after that for hurting usopp btw that leads to more angst

[beanghostprincess]

The other night I read your headcanon about Sanji being an enjoyer of romantic novels. And I thought: what if he had to experience something akin to a romantic fairytale in real life?

So I had this epiphany. What if, after Usopp unsuccessfully confesses to Sanji, who politely rejects him 'cause he's an idiot [affectionate] still struggling with his internalized homophobia, Sanji is forced to face his own feelings when Usopp falls under a spell [falling asleep and never waking up] that only someone who loves him wholeheartedly [and romantically] can break?

Like, imagine this being set right after the Water 7/Enies Lobby arc. THE ABSOLUTE ANGST! THE DRAMA! THE TEARS!! THE CHAOS!!!

This would be such emotional torture for Sanji. He'd have the worst time of his life and he'd feel so so guilty about it. And I absolutely adore it. Everything about this is just perfect.

Sanji rejects Usopp because of so many reasons. Internalized homophobia. Not feeling worthy of his love (because it's pre-ts and he doesn't know anything about his past and Sanji is still tormented by it). Thinking, once again, that Usopp deserves better than him. Thinking loving a man (his best friend, specifically) is wrong and would ruin their whole relationship. Etc etc etc. Usopp feels like shit, to put it in simple words, but accepts the rejection anyway with a bittersweet smile and just says he perhaps will need a little bit of time away from Sanji to deal with it, if that's okay. Sanji says it's fine but it's not, because it's happening exactly what he didn't want: Losing Usopp. Because he's a coward and he can't accept his feelings or Usopp's in any way. At least not yet. At least not without any help.

And I don't really know how this would go. Maybe it's a devil fruit user. Maybe it's something about the island they're at. Maybe it's a magical flower or something, because OP loves doing these things with evil flowers, apparently. But Usopp faints and doesn't seem to wake up. Robin asks for information about it around the island and turns out that, yes, he needs a true love kiss to wake up. Everyone keeps saying it can't be real, because what the hell, it's exactly like a fairytale. But it is real, and Sanji thinks the universe hates him. Nobody knows about them (they definitely know about them. It's just a topic they haven't explicitly touched verbally. At least not yet. I think the ones who know, know are Zoro and Nami. Robin too, of course) so the first thing that comes to Luffy and the other's minds is "okay, we could do this if Kaya was here. Because with how much this guy talks about her, she could be the one waking him up". But there's no time (because let's say that he'll never wake up again if ummm 5 days pass without any kiss) and they know, deep inside, that it won't work. At least a few of them know. Luffy says he could just kiss him himself because he loves Usopp! But Nami says it's not that way. It has to be romantic love. Luffy gets all frustrated and angry about it, I'm sure. It's just not fair. He wonders how that could've happened.

Sanji knows it's his fault. He knows he should fix this.

He knows he loves Usopp. Deeply. Desperately. He needs him in his life and wants him romantically. As best friends, too. In any way. But there's this layer of insecurity-- Maybe they're not meant to be together. Maybe the kiss doesn't work. Maybe he doesn't love Usopp as much as he thinks or maybe it's not in that way and he's just confused (he's always telling himself it's just a phase he's going through for not having a girlfriend yet). Maybe Usopp doesn't love him that much, either. Maybe he's the one confused (because how could he love somebody like Sanji?). So Sanji scared. Sanji is scared Usopp might not wake up. He's scared of what others might think. He's scared of what could happen if he does wake up and they have to talk things out. Yadda yadda.

But Nami confronts him because she knows about them. She asks him to do it. To stop being such a coward when Usopp's life is at risk. And it's pretty much the first time he ever tells no to Nami, refusing to do anything. The helplessness he feels is painful, but thinking about Usopp never waking up is even worse. Two days go by. He never leaves Usopp's side. Nami is growing impatient and Zoro looks at him with true hatred this time. Robin is the one to talk to him next, gently reminding him that nobody is going to judge him. That he can be free to do whatever he wants. That is better to take risks than living with regrets. But Sanji doesn't do anything but thank her. He needs time. But Usopp is running out of it. And then, on the fifth day. Well, fourth day at night, almost the fifth. Then, Zoro talks to him. Sanji is not okay. He has barely eaten. He won't leave Usopp's side. He's acting overly romantic for somebody who can't bear to use the word 'love' to refer to Usopp yet. And Zoro is done. After arguing for a while, Zoro tells him to stop being such a fucking coward and grow some balls and kiss Usopp so he doesn't die on them because, apparently, he's the only one who can save them this time even if Zoro despises the idea. And Sanji goes "But what if I can't?!"

Zoro: What are you talking about? Of course you can. Just go and kiss him. Sanji: No. It- It doesn't work like that. Zoro: To me it looks like it does. Sanji: What if it's not enough? What if I'm not enough? What if it's not- It's not right. For me to like him. I shouldn't, so- What if we're not meant to be and he dies and it's my fault? Zoro: It is going to be your fault either way if you don't try. Sanji: Pfft. Not like you've tried either- Zoro: Because we're smart enough to know we aren't the ones in love with this idiot. You're, quite literally, the only one who doesn't see it. Sanji: What the hell do you know? It's not- Zoro: It is like that. Sanji: I can't do it. Zoro: You won't know unless you try. And I don't give a single fuck whether you can do it or not. I don't care if you want to or not. If he dies because you were too full of yourself to stop being a coward, I will slice you open. Sanji: I'll let you. Zoro: Yeah, no. I know. But I won't give you the satisfaction of following Usopp if he dies. You'll have to live with it. Sanji: What if he doesn't wake up? Zoro: Could you stop being so damn selfish for a second and think about him?! Sanji: I am thinking about him! He's the only thing I can think about right now! Do you think this is easy for me- Zoro: Then stop torturing yourself and Usopp and start acting like you give a fuck about him dying instead of drowning in self-pity. It's ridiculous. Sanji: Fuck you. Zoro: One thing we know is that he'll never wake up if you don't try. And he won't be dying by the hands of some fucking spell, but yours. So do whatever you want, but stop blaming a future you don't know and at least admit you're too much of a coward to face your feelings.

So Sanji realizes, then, that it doesn't matter what he wants, but what Usopp needs. It doesn't matter if he's afraid. He would do anything for Usopp, even facing his fears. He will never know unless he tries, right? He hates that it's mosshead the one to put the idea in his head, but he has to thank him for that. He really did need that.

Long story short, he kisses Usopp. Nobody is around when it happens, but he does. It's painfully slow because he doesn't want to look. He doesn't want to face reality yet. When he finally moves away, though, Usopp isn't opening his eyes. He isn't moving yet. He has this moment, thinking he was right all along and he couldn't do anything to save him.

Until Usopp quickly wakes up from the coma. He asks what happened. Where he is. He says he just had the most annoying dream about one of Sanji's fights with Zoro. Then he says he's hungry, too, for some reason? Like he's been sleeping for days. And Sanji doesn't have time to tell him the truth because he goes to hug him tight. Usopp is still... Having a hard time processing the rejection, so it's a bit uncomfortable. Besides, he doesn't understand this sudden act of affection. But then, Sanji goes "I'm so glad you're okay, idiot. Never do that to me again. Never scare me like that again. I'm so sorry. I should've- And I didn't- I- It's all my fault" / "Wait, what? What are you talking about? Sanji?" / "I- I like you. I- No. More than that. I just- I want you" / "Yesterday you told me-" / "That actually was pretty much a week ago" / "What???" / "But it doesn't matter. Forget that" / "What do you mean a week ago? How long have I been-" / "I can't say it now. I know I can't say it now. And I am sorry, but- But I- I'll stop being a coward. For you, I will do it. Anything. I need you, so, please. Don't ever believe I don't want you back" / "But you said-" / "I was scared. And I am an idiot. And I almost let you die-" / "You almost wHAT?" / "And it's selfish and I am a shitty person for this but will you wait? Until I'm ready to say it? I like you. So much. More than you could ever believe. And I know I need you here. And I know I... You mean everything to me. Is that enough for now?" / "Moron. Of course it is. You could've said so sooner, you know?" / "I know. I'm sorry" / "Now that the fact that you love me and want me and need me yadda yadda has been established... What the fuck do you mean by you almost letting me die?"

And it's, uh- A really funny story to tell that Usopp will forever remember. But Sanji owes him a kiss. A real one now. And Sanji can't deny his sleeping beauty such a petition.