#same with that one scene in The Thing when the alien's eating the guy but its obvious its an ragdoll

[hellishgayliath]

Never seen the nightmare on elm street movies and have watched the majority of friday the 13th movies (still debating on seeing jason x and the remake) and gotta say Freddy vs jason is so damn entertaining to watch. I don't know shit bout the stuff that happens in the other freddy movies other than the videos i see people discuss bout it but the characters in the movie lay out a lot of the plot points that helped me get the general gist of things. Dunno if that acting is just how it is in the other Freddy movies, but I had fun watching it.

[matan4il]

911 ep 705 first watch reactions

Of course 911 would "punish" the "You are the boss of you!" guy with an alien hand that attacks him, and does what it wants. Pooor Buck and Eddie paying the price for that...

Okay, love the storyline with Hen and Karen possibly eventually adopting an older girl. Too many shows just find easy, unrealistic ways to give their same sex couples kids, and I am really glad that 911 shows the reality of it, and that it is a more complex struggle for many, that it's an act of continuously choosing to be parents. That's actually an amazing, difficult thing, and it should be faithfully depicted and respected, for all of its heartache, and the little moments of triumph.

Buck and Tommy on a date, and Eddie comes along with Marisol? Love how Buck's bisexual awakening and coming out continues to involve Eddie so much. Tell me they're end game, even if they're not gonna get together right now, without telling me they're...

I did not need to learn Marisol is moving in with Eddie like this, with any build up, or even any sort of insight into the relationship, and nope, that does not bode well for them. IDK how 911 managed to do it, but they have somehow managed to give Eddie a love interest the show is even less invested in than Ana.

And the funniest bit, is that Marisol and Eddie's big development is only there to further Buck's journey anyway.

"You can never have too much closet space" LMAO the way 911 both made me laugh, and feel sorry for poor, baby bi Buck. XD

Hmmm. Were parts of this scene cut out? We don't get to see Eddie on his own date with Marisol, but constantly looking over at Tommy and Buck? Boo. I'm glad we at least got the BTS photos, then. But seriously, why!? That was gonna be so delicious.

Oh, Tommy's breaking up with Buck. I mean, good for him, and he ain't wrong after Buck's "after this, we're gonna go out looking for chicks" reaction, but man do I feel sorry for Buck. Him and Tommy might not be my end game (Buddie forever will be), but I do think this relationship could be good for our baby bi. Tommy being in the same profession, knowing what it's like to have this gap between who you are and the image of guys in your line of work, plus he's got more experience than Buck, is sure of himself, can help our boy figure himself out, and also Buck obviously does like his vibe. He deserves to be with someone he actually likes, not just the first woman willing to be with him that the plot pushed in his way.

Oh, baby Buck. :( You didn't even tell Maddie about Tommy. You really aren't ready it. But also (and as a Buddie shipper, more importantly), Tommy broke things off with Buck, but what is eating him up, is that he lied to Eddie. XD Yeah, this gonna end with wedding bells, sooner or later. On screen, off screen after the show ends with canon Buddie, or only in my head if 911 never dares make Buddie canon, I don't care. That kind of emotional devotion is not something that my hopelessly romantic heart can ignore.

OMG, this is how Buck comes out to Maddie? XD Via random pronoun mention, and as a by product of trying to figure out how to tell Eddie the truth? This is hilarious. lol It really makes it clear that, after all, the issue for Buck really isn't people knowing he is also dating guys (or checking their asses), even when it's the other closest person in the world for him, it's Eddie. Specifically. Buck's ready, even if he doesn't have the exact clear words yet, he's just not ready to tell Eddie. Can't imagine why. XDDD

What was that awkward post-sex scene with Eddie and Marisol? And the issues with her moving in are popping up a second after she has. But yeah, we have no idea who this woman is as a person, she's been a cardboard cut out so far, and then one of the first things we do learn about her, is that she would call her stuff better than Eddie's? Once again, this is not the stuff great romance is made of. Or... even just the stuff any kind of romance is made of.

Wait, Marisol was a nun, and Eddie didn't even know!? This whole ep is telegraphing in the news of how weird and awkward and underdeveloped this r/s is, not just for us as viewers who know nothing about Marisol, but apparently for Eddie as well.

And of course his Catholic guilt is gonna kick in now. I'd care, except 911 has given me absolutely no reason to. Seriously, I care more about Buck and Tommy after just 2 eps, than Eddie and Marisol, even though this is technically her 2nd season on the show.

Of course Buck went to find Eddie, and spotted him at the gym. Forever 201 vibes, with Eddie being the focus of Buck's attention. ^u^

I couldn't care less about Eddie's Catholic guilt crisis, and how it's actually a projection of what his real issues are with Marisol, but it's nice to see that as always, Buck's the one who can tell when something's off, and offer Eddie exactly what he needs (even when that's to talk to someone else, but Buck figures out immediately who the right person to address is), and then they just very naturally switch, because Eddie can also tell when something's off with Buck, and he wants to tell him something. Soulmates. THAT is the stuff that great romance IS made of.

:/ The imagery of Catholic nuns has not been around for over 2,000 years, please stop being ignorant about your own religion, and the very different way it looked in its early days.

Bobby is forgiven, he does give good advice, and his "her ex, the Lord" bit, which prompted that reaction from Eddie, is hilarious. XD

So... when Eddie is having issues with Marisol, he already knows he has to figure out how he feels about her, but instead of doing so, he goes to his safe place... Buck's loft.

Man, Eddie being into Tommy's choice of avoidning relationships with women, and hanging out with boys, after in the past, Eddie had dealt with his Shannon issues by running away from her, and re-enlisting in the army, where he gets to hang out with boys, when we all (Buck included) know why Tommy's "hanging out with boys"... I do like that if they want to (and hopefully they do), this further lays the groundwork for Eddie's own queer realization.

Buck and Eddie helping each other with their respective romantic problems, without realizing they are each other's respective romantic solution is gonna make me chew on my own fists. Again. But I'm not even a little bit surprised that Eddie was totally fine and accepting of Buck being bi, or that the first thing he thought of is how this reflects on them. Because their friendship IS way deeper and closer than normal for platonic friends, and Eddie's little reassurance is also an admission of that.

Man, for a second I was worried they also cut out Eddie in the loft, once more putting his thumb on Buck's pulse point possessively, in a perfect parallel to 303. I would have sued for emotional damages. But yeah, it says so much that the peak of emotional meaningfulness for Buck when coming out is in relation to Eddie, and that the scene itself peaks with Eddie, instead of finishing rushing out to take care of his own romantic business, hurries back to Buck first, to hug him, place his hand on Buck and give him orders. "Sure, you're gonna be dating this guy, but I'm still your real husband."

Well, at least Eddie amitted to himself and Marisol that he doesn't actually know her. But... I have never seen two people being both being so happy about not moving in together, and I'm supposed to think this r/s has a chance? Okay. Suuuure.

The scene with Buck going to Tommy to set things straight ready for something was lovely, it was nice seeing him excited, and get to choose, and hear he's wanted. But since the note Tommy and Buck's storyline in this ep should have ended on, is Buck showing Tommy he's ready enough to let others know he's dating a guy by inviting Tommy to come with Buck to Madney's wedding, then why is the very next scene playing the romantic switch again, making us think Buck's car just arrived at the wedding with him and Tommy, only for Buck and Eddie to walk in together? I see what you did there, 911.

Thank you for reading! If you're looking for more, you can find my s7 reactions tag here, and more of my Buddie meta and content in my pinned post. xoxox

[britishraptor]

Gonna kick the hornets nest here, but the file from the most recent episode of The Magnus Protocol was incredibly underwhelming. It didn’t take into account at all anything that actually makes snakes scary, little to no foreshadowing, and basically attempted to jumpscare the audience with a reveal that reads more like a parody of a horror story than an actual one.

I might look like an idiot or a fool when everything all strings together later than the line, but I’m questioning so much about this episode.

Parasites are scary. Worms, and insects and mold and rot. Decay, possession. Spiders are scary because they’re hard to see, hard to pinpoint and they move fast, plus the connections with webs related to control, and manipulation. So yeah, a worm lady, sure, a person filled with spiderwebs, also sure. But the only connection between snakes and parasitism could be a joke about ‘shedding your skin’ or how disturbing that one scene in Harry Potter was.

Snakes are scary for two reasons:

1) the same reason bears and tigers all that are scary. Hunt style being hurt, and killed, and eaten. Simple.

B) uncanny valley reasons. Snakes don’t blink. They don’t have facial expressions. The way they move and eat and exist is totally different from humans and mammals. They’re often described as alien and cold.

My questions:

a) why rodent control? why was he even actually brought in? His walls are FULL OF SNAKES. It wouldn’t have lasted five minutes. It doesn’t make any sense even if you know he was concerned about parasites. Snakes don’t give a shit about other snakes. To call someone a snake is to literally call them callous and prone to betrayal. A snake eats the rodent, so you kill the snake. Plus a snake store would have access to medications to kill mites and deal with snake illness? Why call the guy at all?

b) the foreshadowing on the owner is terrible. You could have mentioned his skin needed moisturising. That it seemed dry, flaky. Scaly. But just. A red rash? A rash? Are you saying being full of snakes is an infectious disease? That’s what he said at the end, right? That his throat itches. It was swelling. You can just?? Grow your own snakes?? Is that the implication?

No uncanny valley mention on the owner either at all. He didn’t move weird, being full of snakes? Didn’t sway or limp as he walked, didn’t move sluggishly? Bad hearing, didn’t know what to do with his hands? No? Just a short tempered customer. Okay.

c) You lost me at the thousands of snakes. THOUSANDS? What is this, a clown car? A snake clown car in some random guys skin, who explodes because he was mad a customer walked out.

Look, I’m Australian. And when I ask my friends ‘hey, how big do you normally picture a snake being?’ we picture snakes about 1.5m long. Dinner table length is pretty common for all of our common brown, tiger snakes, red bellies, and even longer for our common carpet pythons. But even if I adjust to like, other countries’ grass snakes, thousands?

The throwaway line at the end was plot relevant I’m sure, but I’m all around confused, and totally not even a little bit scared.

The only praise I have is that the description of the crickets was very creepy, and I loved the visual of them moving around like a shuddering wave of pixels on a screen, only really perceived by their screaming.

But yeah. The setup, the foreshadowing, the coherent theming and consistency all just fell totally flat for me. The only thing I learnt was that this guy applied to the institute and was rejected, and that snakes can’t do dishes.

[jeysecretive]

Okay, okay, I steal ideas, I quickly fall in love with fanfics... Please please take this for what it's worth, because I love what pops into my head and I can't not share it!

So, this time to suffer fic by @weirdozjunkary (MVA), and I'll write nonsense because I haven't watched Monsters vs Aliens from the word at all, and am following a completely my own plot that will unfold after the second part of the fanfic.

(Part two!)

(NOTE: I WROTE THIS IN ANOTHER LANGUAGE, AND DECIDED TO REQUEST IT IN A TRANSLATOR TO AVOID REWRITING IT ALL OVER AGAIN, SO THERE MAY BE MISTAKES!(THOUGH WITH MY LEVEL OF ENGLISH YOU'RE UNLIKELY TO FEEL THE DIFFERENCE LMAO))

ENJOY THE SHOW!

It was a cloudy day in May. It was dank and damp outside, and anyone who needed to go out for business in such weather was sure to wrap themselves in a raincoat or scarf, snorted now and then at the dampness and unpleasant wind.

Sonic, Tails and Shadow were not happy about the weather, so they sat in the GUN base and settled down on Sonic's bed and watched comedies on a homemade movie projector that the fox had made from a ruined microwave (Barry had given it to them). What better way to brighten up a dull, rainy day than with a funny movie and a bag of chips?

Knuckles refused to be entertained, disappearing into a roadside café, eating mugs of delicious hot cocoa and cakes prepared by the owner of the place. Guys did not insist on his choice, and decided to have fun in their own way. And now they watched movies with laughter, exchanging ideas or news every now and then.

But the cozy revelry was suddenly interrupted by General Acorn entering the room.

"–Enough of this nonsense, boys!" she exclaimed nervously, "I have something interesting to show you."

"–Uuuh, we've stopped at the most interesting scene..." Sonic grumbled unhappily, taking his equally frowning friends in his arms and following the chipmunk on his heels. He didn't want to go out his room at all, as the very realization that it was raining outside made him drowsy and drowsy. But he didn't want to disobey orders, and with the thought that GUN it would be worth it to hold off on all sorts of things, Sonic and company entered the observation room.

The General hurried to one of the monitors, giving an order to one of her subordinates.

Plumping herself into a chair, she began clicking hastily on the keyboard.

Finally finding what she needed, she brought up the image on the main screen hanging from the ceiling, large enough for Sonic to look at.

At first, nothing could be seen there but a desolate area: a small lake surrounded by sparse undergrowth. It was taken from a distance, but Sonic recognized the place - it was not far (though one has to figure out what "not far" means to a giant hedgehog...) from one of the small towns west of the GUN base. When he wanted to bask in the sun, Sonic would go there and bask on the soft grass that grew near the pond.

Now the place looked rather bleak, and judging by the swaying trees, it was also windy. Sonic shuddered at the dank sight. The last thing he wanted to do right now was to be there. Shadow and Tails seemed to share his feeling, shiver at little times.

But suddenly guys noticed a strange beam of light coming toward the clearing. It seemed to be some kind of meteorite or comet, but the light grew brighter and brighter, and it was already apparent that some object was flying from the sky at an oblique angle straight toward the waters of the lake. Finally, it crashed into the sand right next to the water, raising a huge column of mud and causing the lake to become very agitated and overflow its banks. At the same moment, the image began to glitch and shake, and finally went out.

"–We installed this camera a week ago so that Ollie" - Sally waved her hand toward one of the employees nervously monitoring some sort of signature on small work computers - "–could monitor the soil conditions in this county, since there have been repeated sightings of sudden flooding or ground instability. But ten minutes ago, we received this video from him."

"–I beg your pardon, ma'am!" shouted one of the soldiers running by "we've just been notified that the object MIGHT be emitting Chaos energy, causing interference throughout the area, but that energy is highly variable, and NOTHING like the signatures of the Chaos Emeralds."

The General looked worriedly at Sonic.

"–Okay Ron, I'll take that under advisement, you may go."

"-Yes, ma'am!"

She turned back to guys again.

"-The object in question may not be an emerald, but we have an obligation to find out its origin."

"- Is there any chance that it was an ordinary meteorite?" Shadow asked.

"Absolutely not. Meteorites have completely different radiation levels, and even if it was one of them, there would be no trace of the lake. Besides, the meteor shower hasn't been predicted for the next four months. I want to send the three of you away to inspect this scene in detail."

Hearing this message, Sonic groaned unhappily. The last thing he wanted to do was go outside in this weather, much less look for anything.

"- Ma'am, why don't you ask someone else to do it, say, send out a search party?"

The General looked at him sternly.

"- No one knows what we'll be facing. Besides, if it's not even an emerald, no one knows how to deal with Chaos energy better than you."-Sonic opened his mouth to speak-"... AND I WON'T TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER! NO ONE CAN HANDLE IT BETTER THAN YOU BOYS, SO LET'S GET TO WORK!"

All three of them left the room and headed down the corridor towards the exit.

They were followed by "...- And please don't forget to take a couple good pictures!!!"

"And why does it have to be us, in this weather?" Sonic said indignantly.

Tails and Shadow silently shared his opinion. They both knew how much the hedgehog hated the cold. Truth be told, they didn't want to run out in the rain to some mysterious meteorite, shivering in the cold and pissing their feet in puddles.

"- Well, at any rate, the sooner we get out, the sooner we get in! We should try and just have a quick look around the place, and we'll be back home.... Unless, of course, something happens..."-Tails broke the silence.

Shadow nodded in agreement.

Ahead of his friends, fox cub went into his workshop. Sonic and Shadow stomped curiously at the entrance, watching him rummage through boxes of junk, sneezing from the dust.

Finally, his face brightened.

"-Hooray, I found it!"-Tails raised the device, which looked like a game joystick with a screen, high above his head.

"-Very good, buddy, but what is it?" inquired Sonic.

"- It's a handheld device for tracking more or less powerful energy sources. It can be used to search for the energy signal of the Chaos Emeralds! I built it for just that purpose, but I haven't had to use it yet. Now I'll tweak it a bit, and we can easily find what we need."

On the occasion of the bad weather, Shadow and Tails had donned raincoats with warm linings. Looking at them, Sonic was quietly envious since GUN hadn't taken care of his warm clothes for such occasions. Seeing his dejected face, the fox cub comfortingly patted the big guy's boot.

"-Let's make this quick and get back home."

Sonic nodded his head.

"-Okay, you're right! There's nothing faster than me anyway."-he hummed.

Stepping outside, hedgehog whinnying as a hail of cold drops rained down on him. Gritting his teeth, Sonic put his friends on his shoulders and sped off.

After only a few minutes, he stopped next to a large crater of sand and mud.

Lowering his buddies to the ground, Sonic began to shake off the moisture fiercely of himself. While he dealt with this procedure, Tales was thoughtfully twiddling one of the buttons on his miracle device.

"These are settings for the beeping sound for better search efficiency," he explained to Shadow, who was looking over his shoulder.

Before they could say anything, Sonic's sneeze rang out across the neighborhood.

"Sorry, guys, I couldn't help it," the hedgehog muttered in confusion. Tails chuckled "–Hey, at least you're wearing a jacket after all!"

The little fox, without answering anything, went back to his search device.

Finally finished, he solemnly moved the gray slider and smiled proudly.

              "BEEP--BEEP--BEEP--BEEP."

"- Wow, not bad for a meteorite!"- Tails even jumped up in surprise. "- I didn't expect the energy to be THIS strong..."

The fox slowly began to slide into the center of the crater.

"- According to my calculations, this energy could very well equate to the power of several emeralds!"

Finally finding himself in the middle of the crater he scratched the back of his head thoughtfully-"- Hmmmm.... Strange... It feels like the source of the signal is elsewhere.... And it's... Moving?!"-Shadow immediately landed next to Tails-"And what does that mean, fox?"

Foxy shook his head thoughtfully-"-I can say with certainty that there's nothing in that funnel."

"So you're saying that the meteorite grew legs and got out of here and went about its business?" Sonic laughed.

Both buddies frowned at him.

Sonic, realizing that his joke was not appreciated, pouted resentfully and walked away.

But suddenly he noticed that the sand around him was cut by a string of strange footprints. They were clearly Mobian, but they were extremely erratic, as if the person getting out of the funnel had been spinning or drunk. The footprints were already half-drenched in rain, but they were still visible. And they led toward the woods.

"- GUYS, I FOUND SOMETHING INTERESTING!"- Sonic took turns picking up his friends in a pinch and placing them near his find.

Immediately a dead silence hung around.

"-Hey guys, don't you think...?" whispered Tails.

Shadow slapped his forehead-"-WHY DIDN'T WE THINK OF THIS SOONER?! WHILE WE WERE GONE, ANYONE COULD HAVE GOTTEN IN HERE AND STOLEN THE EMERALD-"

"-No, wait!" Tails interrupted him excitedly, "This energy is nothing like Chaos! Maybe..."

All three of them looked at each other.

"Does Neo have any relatives?" whispered Sonic.

"LET'S GO FIND HIM BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE!" Shadow was the first to rush out of his seat. The others, after a moment's hesitation, rushed after him.

***

Were the aliens going to take over the world again? We'll find out next time!

[most-datable-datable-bracket]

ROUND 1 MATCH 94

Jaal propaganda:

“His romance is all about trust gained, vulnerability and making each other feeling safe and he's SO sweet throughout. Player character (Ryder) arrives unannounced on the planet where Jaal's species live, and he joins them to assess their intentions. He's slow to trust (last aliens that they made contact with literally started a decades-long war against his people) but after a while he can start to open up (he responds well to Ryder trusting him and not intervening in certain scenarios, choosing to help his people rather than just finish a mission, honesty in general). He's curious about everything, eager to share knowledge on language, food, biology, culture, literally anything that comes to his mind. He likes tinkering and understanding how things work, he writes poetry and he sews. If romanced, he invites Ryder to his home to meet his mother(s) and the rest of the family, tells them "You make my heart sing" and asks them if they want to be together. Eventually he will take Ryder on a date to his favorite place on the planet to confess his love (player can agree to an intimate scene but it progresses the same even if they say no to him). After they officially get together he'll start using pet names like "Darling one" or "dearest" or "amazing heart" or "You are the light that we all follow, that I follow". Plus, after Ryder meets her, his mother starts doting on you and sending you emails to ask questions to make them feel 100% welcomed in the family (especially since Ryder is human and they face public scrutiny for being of two different planets/species). He's constantly smitten for the player character and not afraid to make it clear for everyone in the general vicinity.”

Jun propaganda:

“He was a gay option in a JRPG in 1999. He’s an astrology bitch. He attacks by throwing flowers a la Tuxedo Mask. He and Tatsuya (the player character) exchanged their most treasured possessions with each other while standing in front of a bridal store. His relationship with Tatsuya is central to the plot. Choosing him as the romance unlocks a demon contact option where the two of them just stand in front of the demon and flirt. One of his solo demon contact options is just him doing an “I’m just a little guy” routine. He’s kind and sweet and caring and earnestly wants to help people but may the heavens have mercy if you piss him off because he also has no qualms about committing murder. Most characters, when their stat bonuses from eating run out, will just make a comment about getting hungry but Jun will take the opportunity to ask Tatsuya out on a date. The lead devs agreed in an interview that he’s the best romance option.”

[thevindicativevordan]

Since you read all of Ultimate Fantastic Four, what do you think of the series?

Gave me an understanding of why shows like Keeping Up With The Kardashians are popular. Something about following trashy people can be oddly compelling and entertaining. Ellis and Millar’s sections were the strongest of the run, with Carey only getting good towards the end. Ellis spends a lot of time “realistically” explaining how the powers of the Four work, and used that same approach to the Ultimate takes on Doom and the Negative Zone too. Millar in contrast is throwing out cool ideas to see what sticks (zombie F4, everyone gets superpowers, spiders that eat time travelers, Doom pulls a Superior Spider-Man on Reed) and doesn’t particularly care to explain in depth how any of it works. His is the most entertaining section of the UFF and the one where the premise really shines. You get to see the potential of a less squeaky clean F4 in terms of what stories can be told, all of the Four get character focus even if in the case of Sue and Johnny it only makes them more unlikable.

I already talked about Reed but regarding the other three:

Ben is more or less the same as his 616 counterpart. Pissed at Reed for his transformation, angsts over it and is terminally depressed, but when his team or world needs him he brings the clobbering. Thing’s best moments are ironically in the President Thor arc where he has no powers. Scene at that end where he beats the Super Skrull to death for genociding Earth is peak Thing. Ben Grimm rules no matter the reality.

Ultimate Johnny is a moron. A well-meaning moron with a (small) heart of gold to compensate for having no brains to be fair. He has some good moments like clueing Reed in that Sue likes him at the start of the series, and being willing to give up his powers if it means curing Ben as an apology for an incredibly asshole “joke” he plays on Ben earlier. But he remains a shallow fratbro for the entire run, with only the death of his father at the end of the series (thanks to Ultimatum) pushing him towards bettering himself. Bendis’ usage of him in USM is superior to how he’s used in UFF imo.

Another unintentional foreshadowing here that I loved. Sue goes on a mission to Siberia alone after Reed alienated himself from the rest of the team because he was obsessed with shooting the Cube. Sue gets shot down and Johnny blames Reed for it, threatening to burn Reed to death if Sue dies. Follows through on that threat after Reed DOES hurt Sue in Ultimate Doom! Within the arc itself Johnny comes across as an unstable prick, but people probably feel more inclined to side with him knowing what Reed will become. I however saw how you could feasibly make Johnny a bad guy, imagine a world where Sue does die and Johnny is the one to go off the deep end. Can’t see 616 Johnny ever breaking like that, but this guy could have.

Sue… is much, much worse than her 616 counterpart. Most writers, even great ones like Hickman, don’t know what to do with Sue. At best she’s the “mom” and that’s her entire character. She takes care of the kids and nags the rest of the team. Ultimate Sue being unmarried means that they can’t fall back on that so instead they make her whole personality being a woman. Mole Man and Namor are sex pests towards her, she gets kidnapped because one villain wants to use her to resurrect his wife and the other villain wants to steal her powers because she thinks they’re wasted on Sue. Everything about her revolves around the men in her life, even breaking her and Reed up merely leads to a new permanent relationship between her and Ben.

Sue’s biggest fear is becoming her mom, who is a selfish asshole who abandoned the Storm family because she valued her career more than them. Suppose that means she’s attracted to Reed initially because her mommy issues made her think she could get Reed to pick her over science where she failed with her mom. She’s constantly showing off skin to titillate the readership. Arcs focused on her were the worst of the run, and that breakup scene at the end of UFF: Requiem managed to make her shooting down a marriage proposal at her dad’s funeral unsympathetic. All these legit reasons to break Sue and Reed up for good, and they went for the one that makes Sue as unlikable as possible. Yeah how dare Reed not prioritize saving you over saving the planet!

If UFF exists on a spectrum with Reed being morally sketchy even prior to his breakdown, and Ben essentially being the same as his 616 counterpart, Johnny and Sue are right in the middle with Johnny edging towards the heroic side and Sue leaning towards villainy. People have forgotten this but Ultimate Sue had two evil futures where she broke bad. One where she becomes Kang which was Fialkov trying to justify Reed’s transformation into Maker, and the other in a completely forgotten F4/X-Men crossover where she becomes an evil dictator in an alternate future after Johnny gets killed in Ultimatum, with Reed opposing her. God that entire story was a fever dream, on its own it’s mediocre as hell but every goddamn reveal hits ten times harder when you know what’s coming.

Damnit this was a punch straight to the gut. In said future Reed becomes Nihl, no matter what it seems he was destined to emulate one of the Four’s foes. Biggest takeaway from UFF for me is that I could buy Ultimate Reed, Sue, or Johnny breaking bad. All three are shitty people with poor emotional control and narcissistic elements to their personalities. Reed simply had the misfortune to be the one Bendis chose to shove into the deep end.

Ultimate X-Men is the only Ultimate series I haven’t read yet but right now I rate UFF as the weakest of the ones I have. It’s not bad by any means! Actually I quite enjoyed it depending on the arc. Unlike USM and Ultimates however I don’t think UFF does anything better than the mainline FF book. Tellingly that while MCU adaptions of Spider-Man and Avengers borrowed a lot from their Ultimate counterparts, the FF seem to be drawing entirely from 616. UFF works better as a contrast with the mainline rather than as an entry point to the franchise for new readers.

[carrot-gallery]

Little things about Asteroid City that killed me on my second watching:

The spy in sunglasses just. peeking into the background of random ass scenes

The incredible pause before “you’re perfect”

Jones having his shirt up over his mouth when Conrad very first introduces the character of Augie— same as when he was sitting in on the acting class

The sunglasses spy guy is the one launching empty beer bottles into the sky for the skygazers’ parents to shoot with the ray gun a week into quarantine

The missing scenes we only hear described!!!! i’m gonna make another post for them bc goddamn

As the camera moves off the kiss Jones leans into Conrad sooo tenderly i’m gonna eat glass

Montana and the band just appearing out of nowhere to play the alien song

Augie / Jones / Jason’s uncomfortable little laugh after the daughter asks if they’re orphans and he says no because I’m still alive (this laugh was about Conrad I swear to christ)

The one kid tossing a handful of quarters as the motel manager pitches owning land in future Alien’s Landing, USA

When the bus with the school kids on it pulls up, it has 4 license plates and they all say something weird on them (anyone have a screenshot?)

“It exploded itself”

Whenever a man says “Midge Campbell” all the other men go “Midge Campbell”

The entire point of the whole event is to demonstrate the theory of “cosmic flirtation” but the math doesn’t work

“If you wanted to live a nice quiet peaceful life, you picked the wrong time to get born”

[dang-orange]

dang-orange makes a list of characters he'd shake inside a glass jar:

i decided to be insane while i wait for the Methylphenidate pill to hit (i was thought to have adhd and still have some leftovers from trying to treat that) so i can study. so i made a list of what i think are kins? i refuse to look up what that actually means so im going by the context that a thousand years of reading tumblr posts on pintrest gave me.

Okay! so:

Kinger is a new one, he seems like such a funny silly guy who is kind of out of it, something i absolutely get! so he goes there.

Izzy Hands has been a cause of insanity for me since season one, but season two got me worse. what a funny fellow. i get the whole being a tryhard thing, and sort of losing it a bit over having to change your ways. havent had to eat own my toes, lost a leg or done drag while singing in french, so those things i just find amusing.

Peter B. Parker! what a funny guy, i didnt expect him to actually come back on the second spiderverse movie. being a cool mentor is something admirable i think, and the scene with aunt may made me spend way too many hours on ao3 as i thought that could have been more of a thing (in my head the movie would have done well as a series, more time to explore the really cool characters they had). Also: him being a version of spiderman ''were things didnt go well'' that doesnt go in a morbid direction is very baller.

Doctor Twobrains i only know of from fandom osmosis. i did watch the series as a kid, but i really cant remember shit. the rat brain is funny, and i love anything involving inventors with a theme (i had to fight myself a few too many times to not include doofenshmirtz). the manerisms and vibe are very silly, the excentricities vibe with me.

Agent Stone was the only reason i watched the sonic movie. i saw a trailer and thought, huh i dont think i remember ever seeing this fellow on anything sonic. turns out, he was a new character and very, very funny. what a guy! i can imagine going that far being a henchman. i, however, do have a deep hatred against the guy that does robotnick, so i havent seen much else other than the first film (that i very much pirated).

Pyro is such a mistery. they just burn things and act jolly, the whole pyroland thing is also so stupid. i mained him when i played tf2, but for now i just save fanart of her burning shit and think about how cool it'd be to have a full body suit, be unintelligible and get to burn stuff. absolute 10/10.

Hazel from The Umbrella Academy was fun while he lasted. The idea of being a time traveling mercenary and still getting shitty hotel rooms is hilarious to me. made me really want to get suspenders, but i dont think that'll happen.

Scar (from Hermitcraft) is such a chaotically silly guy. i wish i could pull that off. going from scam, to huge incredible creations, to changing allies on a dime, to playing games by any other rules than the ones stabilished? i wish i could do that! btw the fanart is by reddit user dead_cricket_ (i didnt want to use a minecraft skin but wanted to make sure that I AM TALKING ABOUT THE FANON CHARACTER NOT THE REAL DUDE THAT MAKES VIDEOS)

Elliot Gussman from The Umbrella Academy was also fun while he lasted. i also have some really, really weird paranoia problems and would act the same if i had alien strangers in my house. there isnt a lot of fandom stuff on him, as he's such a minor character, so i just juggle a few too many head canons on this silly guy.

Aziraphale. hehe. haha. im absolutely normal about this guy. being an angel and having the ideology of heaven hammered into your head, and complying with things you know you shouldnt because you know the consequences and that theres someone all-seeing always watching you? i get that 100%. Two other things: the constant forced smiles that are clearly unnatural and doing silly things you know you arent good at are also relatable.

i really like Abner Krill. this is so long already, but i just, really like him. i wish he didnt get killed, that movie is my favourite and i wish it could get a sequel. i'll be short on the whole thing by saying that being the weirdest one on a bunch of batman villans is very funny, and his powers are very fucked up in a cool way.

Oswald Cobblepot was the only reason i saw Gothan. him going from just a guy to.. The Penguin?? absolutely crazy. i really got the whole bit where he was getting higher on the crime scene by biting small bits and getting big results.

I could write 20.000 words on each of these, but this formatting is ass and i think the Methylphenidate is working (it's been a bit more than 40 minutes between writing and looking up images that werent so bad), so i should go study/work. if anyone wants me to go insane again, dont worry! i absolutelly will. i made an account here for a reason.

[nerdygoth77]

Savoy's Knife Trick

Have you ever seen the movie Aliens? This drabble is based on a scene in the movie called Bishop’s knife trick. It gave me major Redeye being bullied by Gage vibes and I just had to write it. Gage’s voice actor(Mark Rolston) is actually in this movie and very sexy too, I highly recommend watching the movie for several reasons, and watching him do shirtless pull-ups is one of those reasons.

Mark Rolston's character, Drake, and what he does in this scene is the exact same as Gage in this fic! While the character Hudson(Bill Paxton) is Redeye, and Bishop is Savoy.

I decided to link the movie scene here! This scene is such a fun part of this incredible movie. Bill Paxton has always had major Redeye vibes to me, and of course Mark Rolston is literally Porter Gage.

I posted this work on AO3 as part of my Gage drabble series. Read it and more here at AO3!!

Or just read it below! :)

Redeye sat at the bar, surveying the crowd in Cappy’s Cafe. The place was packed. Drinking Buddy had just made a massive fresh batch of beer, and a group of Operators with instruments was supposed to come play some live music. The band and the drinks were so good that they brought in quite a few important customers.

On the opposite end of the bar sat the Overboss and Gage, along with Mason. The boss had a bottle in her hand as she talked loudly to Gage and Mason, a wide smile on her freckled face. She was leaning on Gage, the painfully sober raider holding onto her waist like a lifeline. Dogmeat was lying by their feet, his head resting on his paws. Mason, not sporting his face paint, stood beside the couple, smirking as the Overboss talked. Redeye would bet money on it that she was a bit buzzed and incredibly entertaining.

The bar was crowded, full of members of each gang. Savoy was even out today, sitting in the darkest corner possible with a few other Disciples. Savoy rarely crawled out of the hole he called home just to come drink with friends, he must've run out of blood to drink or something.

“Savoy!” Redeye shouted, the masked face of the Disciple enforcer turning his direction, “Do the thing with the knife! ” He said, pulling a combat knife from his boot and holding the handle out towards Savoy. “C’mon man! Do the knife thing!” He beckoned the raider over.

Savoy grinned and jumped to his feet, walking slowly to Redeye. He moved like a predator, the crowd growing silent. Raiders wordlessly stepped out of Savoy's way as he approached Redeye. Savoy’s grin turned more snake-like when he got closer to Redeye, Redeye having no idea that Gage was stalking up behind him. When Savoy grabbed the knife from his hand, Gage grabbed Redeye and put him in a tight hold. Redeye began panicking internally but tried to keep his cool.

“Yeah, do the knife thing, Savoy.” Gage mocked in his southern drawl, tightening his muscular arms around Redeye, securing him with a thick arm around his throat. “Gage what are you doing man…” Redeye mumbled, “Oh just shut up.” Gage sneered as he grabbed Redeye’s hand and put it on the table, holding his wrist so Redeye couldn’t move it.

Savoy put his hand over his, “Hey man! Not me! Not me!” Redeye shouted, panic melting into his voice. Gage practically growled out his words, “Yes you! Now shut up, don’t move… Do it Savoy!” Savoy smirked devilishly as he flipped the knife a few times in his hand, twirling it a few times just to show off. It also made Redeye incredibly nervous, which was just what Savoy wanted.

“Oh fuck….Guys quit messing around!” Redeye shouted as he tried to squirm out of Gage’s hold, Gage securing him a bit better so Redeye couldn’t move at all. The panic really began to set in.

Redeye felt like he was about to lose his hand or life, the fear making him sweat. He couldn’t see Gage but he knew he was sporting a shit-eating grin. ”Don’t move” Gage said again, tightening his grip further. He was holding him so tight Redeye felt like he couldn't breath, his breaths coming in short rushed bursts. The crowd of the bar, plus a few people who heard the commotion from outside, had gathered around them. Everyone was waiting for a trick or to see if Savoy and Gage were going to finally slaughter Redeye. It was impossible to tell which. The Overboss even had a front-row seat, a grin on her pretty face.

Redeye really thought he was about to die.

Savoy twirls the knife in his hand one last time before slamming it between his and Redeye’s fingers. Redeye let out a high pitched scream that some would call "unmanly" as Savoy quickly slams the knife between each of their fingers in the typical Five Finger Fillet fashion.

Redeye screams grow louder as Savoy’s pace quickens, the raider not nicking their fingers or missing his mark. Savoy continued to increase the speed of the knife, Redeye screaming as he helplessly watched, waiting to lose a finger. Gage couldn’t contain his laughter and was practically giggling as Redeye screamed.

The crowd had grown, the loud cheers and laughter of the crowd almost muting the screams of Redeye. Redeye was too focused on his hand and the knife going between his fingers to notice who in the crowd was laughing at him. He’d worry about payback later, if he survived…..

Savoy was fast and perfect, not slipping once. Redeye was worried that he’d “slip” and end up stabbing him in the throat or something. Sweat rolled down Redeye’s temple as he continued to shout like a man being tortured, his eyes following the quick movements of the blade.

After going through their fingers multiple times Savoy slammed the knife deep into the table beside Redeye’s hand, Savoy's chest moving quickly as he breathed heavily from the excitement. The horrible snake smirk was still on Savoy’s face. He didn’t say anything, he just stared at Redeye to unnerve him further. It worked, Redeye looking away from him.

Porter Gage let go of Redeye and stepped back. He dropped a cold beer in front of him, the beer sloshing over the rim and onto Redeye’s hand. Redeye jumped a bit when the cold liquid hit him, flinching even harder when Gage slapped his shoulder hard enough to sting. “Drink up.” Gage chuckled, walking back to his seat and the Overboss.

Redeye tried to get his breathing and heart rate under control, his voice a little breathless, “Not cool man! Fuck you guys!” Savoy bared his teeth like a wild animal before walking away from Redeye. He walked back to his dark corner full of Disciples. Nisha had decided to join the party, Savoy sitting down beside her, their knees bumping together. Redeye still believed that they were fucking. It was one of his favorite rumors and boy did it make sense when you watched the two interact.

Gage laughed and sat down beside Lilly, watching as Redeye took a shaky sip of his beer. “Goddamn that was entertaining. I want to do that again.” Gage spoke loudly enough for Redeye to hear, returning his arm to its rightful place around Lilly’s waist. Lilly giggled and pressed a kiss to the pulse point on his throat. Gage leaned down to whisper something in her ear, the Overboss blushing and shoving him away while giggling, Gage grinning at her before leaning in for a kiss.

Redeye looked away from them, they were too gross to watch for any longer. The way they looked at one another made Redeye want to puke.

He’d have to think of a way to tell this story in a way that didn’t make him seem like a coward. He’d some some more beer to think that hard, maybe some Mentats too…. He waved over Drinking Buddy so he could get to thinking.

[redstringraven]

TMNT ask game! 6.) Do you own any TMNT merchandise?

18.) Who is your favorite villain?

28.) What is one thing you would like to see explored more in TMNT art/fics?

thank you!!!!! c:

TMNT's 40th anniversary ask game!

6.) do you own any TMNT merchandise?

a few things! most of them i've gotten as an adult, because i have adult money that sometimes doesn't have to go toward basic survival. uuh, i have a little 87s hotwheels battleshell i found in the grocery store, i got the '03 basic action figures for each of the boys, i have a city at war t-shirt from target that i think is IDW?, a 2003 20th anniversary print by @shellsweet which may not be 'official' but i'm counting it because i'm in love with it, those tiny funtastic books for each of the boys, and a couple dvds i've scavenged from my local movie trading company. --oh, also some '03 trashcan... storage thing i found on ebay. i keep it on my desk at work and store my pencils in it. i think it was originally meant to be a candy holder? who knows.

18.) who is your favorite villain?

*vacant stare as i blue-screen through the villains* ... honestly? probably stockman. i love to hate the guy, but, at the same time, a small part of me feels really bad for him and is shaking his hand when he's like "why won't you let me die". like. i might not fully understand, but i know the feeling of being exhausted and wanting off the ride. i get it, buddy; immortality is a curse. i dunno; he may not be the most compelling or threatening, but i always enjoy when stockman's on screen. it's fun to watch his hubris get the better of him, it's fun to see him be willing to sass/disrespect someone with as much power and influence as ch'rell (even if it often comes with a price), and also he made a jurassic park movie reference once at dr. chaplin's expense and gets major points for that. 🎵☝ ah ah ah! you didn't say the magic word~. also-also, he made mousers. i fucking love mousers. they're just lil guys! with a bit of a teething problem! their tails wag!!! these dogs are sharp, but they're still good, bront!

28.) what is one thing you would like to see explored more in TMNT art/fics?

it's probably the horror/lovecraft fan in me, but i'd love to see folks explore the fact that the alien creature from the darkness within is still out there and influencing people. i am semi-regularly driven mad (lol) by the fact that the writers decided to expand on the underground city and its old inhabitants more in s4, rather than acknowledge that THING is still alive. especially given how much heavier s4 was and the things it set out to do and address. i feel like that was gift-wrapped for them?? i dunno. i'm in pain. but if the fandom doesn't do it, i certainly will. i have a bit of a crossover/au i've been slowly cooking up behind the scenes directly tied to this fucker still being alive and active in the city. just... i, as usual, have a lot of stuff i want to do, so who knows when i'll get around to it. BUT IT'S THERE. plotting, scheming. eating me alive from the inside, as lovecraftian horrors are want to do.

[dude1818]

To Sleep in a Sea of Stars

Last week I read To Sleep in a Sea of Stars by Christopher Paolini. Full disclaimer, I had no idea that was the same author as the Eragon series until I got to the acknowledgements at the end. This was a thousand pages of hard sf space opera, and the whole time I was thinking "I should check out this guy's other stuff too!"

Imagine The Thing, but more futuristic and set on a potential colony planet. You're halfway through that story, and the alien has started attacking your research crew, when suddenly another race of aliens shows up and now you have to team up with it to fight the new aliens. That's the first hundred pages of this book. So many things happen in this story

The overarching background of the story is the war between humanity and these aliens, the Wranaui. It takes place in the 23rd century, and humanity has settled a handful of stellar systems so far and has found relics of sapient aliens, but not met any yet. The main character, Kira, is a xenobiologist who discovers the alien (more of a symbiotic exosuit) that kicks off the war. The story follows her and the spaceship crew that picked her up as they travel from system to system trying to figure out what the suit is, why the aliens attacked, and how to stop them

Sidebar: there's a really cool FTL system in this world, which makes it possible to travel between stars in realtime months. That's still long enough that crews are in cryo for the trip, and FTL communication can't go faster than that, so you get to have your cake of a multi-stellar civilization and eat the isolated worlds where things can change drastically during your travel time too. (One of the appendices is the introductory chapter to a textbook on FTL and UFT; it's so cool)

I feel like this book could easily have been broken up into two or three, there's so much happening. Around the halfway point, the (non-suit) aliens go from being a symbol of death that appears randomly in the sky into multiple defined kinds of aliens, with their own fleshed out motives and sub-factions that can be reasoned about. It all connects, but that seemed like a change in focus that would've been a reasonable pause point. (The last 10% is a much harder diversion from either of sections, but I'll put my thoughts for that under the cut because it's spoilery)

Overall I really enjoyed it. There are more works in the series that I'll definitely be checking out. The xenobiology and especially the physics were incredibly well thought out, and I haven't seen someone play with travel times in such an interesting way before. There were some weaker aspects, especially on the politics side (if Kira goes "surely we can tell the military what we've discovered and they'll apply that information in a way that's beneficial to humanity and humane to the aliens" one more time I will lose it), but at least that mostly seems to be an in-universe character flaw (spoiler alert: the military does not). It is kinda funny how Kira makes a big deal about trying not to see the soldiers who get in their way, but narratively we need a bunch of alien mooks to kill, so they have to come up with a contrived reason (alien brain backup tech) to make that not count as murder

Spoilers for the ending:

Context: the final bad guys are a different group of aliens called the Corrupted that are a sapient gray goo, and are derived from the same tech as the suit symbiote. Kira merges with their central body and takes it over, self-destructing their army and converting them towards positive life-preserving ends. That felt a little shark-jumpy, but is fine

How that played out was super cringey though. First an uncomfortable sex scene before the final battle in which she wonders if she can still get pregnant while the symbiote is attached; then she learns that the suit was supposed to be a self-directed terraforming tool called the Seed; then as part of the positive gray goo, she positions herself as the Mother, a weird archdruid-in-space. It all just gave me the ick and didn't feel like it matched the tone of the rest of the book at all

[ballcrusher74]

Your sona (bigform) looks very cool, reminds me of the silhouette of a dinosaur, what is the critter and what inspired such a cool mech tang?

OK. RAMBLE TIME

My sona (Jawbreaker) is a fucked up star alien thing ! You're gonna get a little more than just what he is and inspirations and I hope you don't mind, I made a whole fucking species just for this guy's backstory LOL Stellarites are shapeshifting, celestial beings created with star energy. Their strength varies, depending on what kind of star their energy was sourced from. Jawbreaker (his actually birth name is unknown and he forgot himself) was created with the energy of a quasi star as an experiment for his overlord, Metsu. He served in their celestial empire as a royal guard, and had a close eye kept on him. He excelled compared to his peers, and was deemed spectacular at his work- the only downside was his short temper. He was constantly consulted about his attitude, and it only seemed to grow worse. He grows disobedient, to the point where he is sentenced to be shattered for his resources to be recycled. He escapes from his home planet, landing on Earth. He examines life from afar, and takes on a more humanoid form. As he lives out his days on his new home, there's something that he can't avoid now- taxes. So what's a better job to get when you used to be a guard for an intergalactic ruler? Become a hitman! This is where he obtained his helmet and his name. A couple years go by and he's considered a perfect killing machine, being able to leave such little trails behind in his work. Then, he fucks up one day. A single drop of his blood is found at a scene. This results in a huge chase for him, especially because he is extraterrestrial life. He eventually is caught, and used in government experiments. These experiments were based off the mega-structure, dyson spheres, in which they tried to extract energy out of him. He manages to escape this, takes on his current form with a repainted helmet and fresh new look, and is now a party-animal alien out on the run with a bounty on his head. (This is like, a really watered down version of his story cus if I put the whole thing here that shit would go on forever)

Also y'know what, fuck it, here's the full ref sheet + cool guitar item that I keep forgetting I have OOPS

Going onto actually inspirations now, here's a couple !

The general design was just based off of character design aspects that I like a lot. Chunky shoes, shoulder pads, big sleeves, huge zipper- etc, etc.

The hoodie and boxers combo just comes from the fact that that is typically what I roam around in

The star eye was me trying to recycle from my old sona, but the true origin of it was it being a reference to one of my favorite musicians at the time, Grandson ^_^

The half heart locket is for my boyfriend <3

The big ol' eyebrow is just cus I have bushy eyebrows + I love big ass eyebrows

I'm gonna be honest, the hair was when I was trying to make my sona on Roblox but I obviously couldn't have my helmet, so a red base and cyan trihawk came along and it's stuck since then + I FUCKING LOVE MOHAWKS SO BAD

The blood is based off of glowstick liquid . Please trust me when I say to not eat glowsticks they do not taste good .

The colors are also kinda recycled from my old sona, but also because I fucking love red and cyan

The whole alien aspect is taken from the fact my birthday is on the same day as the Area 51 raid LMAO

Exaggerated proportions kinda came from FNF . yeag

THE HELMET . The helmet was a thing I scrapped from a really old oc of mine, which was kinda taken from Jasper (SU) . The addition for the jaw part was inspired by a bear trap

also these two that I use for this blog . They're obviously more jokey looking + I made it so they are both immortal beings that have existed since the dawn of time that just fuck around on Earth but yea it's also just me . but funny looking

I think that is it . yeag

[slowthinkingreader]

The Claw of The Conciliator - Gene Wolfe

(Started May 27th, 2024, finished June 6th)

Monkey men! Green men from the future! Huge alien men! Robot guys from the future, maybe! There is, above everything, no shortage of strange and multitudinous guys in these books. There is no ink spared on the matter! Every man Severian meets is cool as hell; the women...

I shouldn't have waited several weeks to write my review of this book, clearly, but frankly, the latter part of it left a sour taste in my mouth and I've been stewing over how I feel about it. I think there's something very skillful going on with regards to what's happening with Severian in this book with regards to his misogyny and his relationship to women, and I'm interested in seeing where it goes (even if my presentiment is that it's not going to be very interesting to me) but at the same time, I'm finding it hard to look past the misogyny as I read, and to enjoy thinking about what the book has to say about it. Mainly, because Severian as our narrator is so disinterested in the internal lives of women unless it revolves around him, the effect is that I just don't care! To me, that's boring! I'm bored of Jolenta and Dorcas being nothing-characters treated like nothing. But then, that's also what the book is about.

About men... I like the contrast between Severian as complemented by Jonas, and the Severian we're stuck with after he leaves the narrative. The book spends a lot of time showing how much they care about each other. They help each other. Severian looks up to him, clearly, and considers him a good friend, and some part of their relationship is also tinged by the fact that Jonas appears to be much older than Severian, who is still (implied to be? Explicitly? Unclear if I missed a detail) very young. There's a feeling to their relationship that is partly mentorly slash brotherly. Jonas doesn't quite bring out "a side" of Severian that is "better", if you will, but in the absence of women he appears kinder, and less tinged with so many complications regarding what he wants. It's clear that what he wants from men is community, regard, belonging, etc.; from women he expects other things, mostly the high of lording power over them. It's pleasant in a way these books haven't been since the earliest chapters of Shadow, where he's (notably) surrounded by other men of his guild. When we lose that sense again, it's frustrating, in a way that's both interesting (in the sense that it feels purposeful) and sad.

I am DEEPLY interested in the fact that he appears to share a mind with Thecla now. Possibly the most interesting thing to have happened so far. I don't know why I didn't expect this to happen when we learned about the corpse-eaters, but it's so good. It's so good. The moment where Thecla inhabits his body in the prison/waiting room, walking in the dark, and a child "mistakes" his steps for a woman's? Could talk about this for ages. I want to take a transgender hammer to this whole concept but I'll abstain for now; I don't know where this is really heading. Possibly nowhere. The book doesn't seem interested in questioning the border between what is Severian and what is Thecla, at least not purposefully enough, and maybe that's not where Gene Wolfe is taking things. I don't expect it, but it would be incredibly sick if they merged to the degree where they can't tell which thoughts belongs to whom; some real dissolution of personhood. Let Thecla eat HIM, in their beautiful mind palace, right back!

There's a lot of moving players now. Agia. The Pelerines. Jonas. Vodalus and his bitch wife, eating corpses. The autarch has appeared and he's up to something, whilst looking androgynous. The lovecraftian horrors are real and BRIEFLY ON LAND, trying to lure Severian down there with them, in what was (in my opinion) one of the better scenes of this book. Hethor appears everywhere; he's implied to be terrifying, because the things he says and does are terrifying, but I actually love him; his comedic timing is too good, I can't hate him for that. Agia tries to kill Severian for a third (?) time. The Claw of the Conciliator is very useful, even if it's very ominous to me.

What else. I don't care about the play in the middle of this book, unfortunately. Or the story about the giant. I can't follow it at all. I don't understand how it fits into the narrative so far. In all honesty, I'm getting a little fatigued from trying to figure out what's happening on any of these pages. Even though this might be intentional, I feel like I get faint hints at bigger pictures moving around and if I paid more attention I would enjoy them better, but I also don't care enough about them to do so. I have a certain disdain for works that demand your attention to the point where it takes you out of the actual work itself, just to entertain an idea which is not interesting enough to be explicit about in the first place. It's not rewarding to me. I'm not sure how else to put it. I get tired of these games!!

Very mixed feelings on this book. Needs more Jonas. 5/10

[saibug1022]

Let the Shadows Fall Behind You

Word Count: 1.1k

Taylor (ES MC) and Callum Wyland (Hero MC), Jake McKenzie x Taylor (ES MC)

A/N: Okay. There's gonna be a lot of things in here that don't make sense. That's because this scene takes place in a crossover/sequel I'm starting to plan. But even before I had any semblance of a plot for that I had this scene bouncing around in my head. So, I very much hope you like it

“Are you okay?”

“Hm?” Taylor hummed as he looked over to where Callum was sitting across the green fire. The taller man was watching him, almost studying him. At first, it was kind of unnerving, especially for such a kind guy, but over time Taylor had gotten used to it. The familiarity of it was even comforting sometimes. He supposed that was what happened when you spent weeks with a person day in and day out. At least, he assumed it was weeks. He wasn’t sure if time was passing the same way on Earth.

The green fire made from Taylor’s newfound powers with the light of the glowing prisms studding the cave walls around them made Callum look like some sort of otherworldly being. Which to be fair, he was. They both were. Yet despite that and despite the fact they were in another dimension, Callum was wearing a literal superhero suit, and Taylor’s eyes turned green when he got pissed off, the whole situation still felt so very human. And yet…

“You’ve barely said a thing for the last three days and you’ve been staring at the fire like it personally offended you,” Callum explained. “All we have left to make a portal home is the Realm Prism and we’re closing in on it. We’re so close but you don’t really seem excited.”

“It’s complicated,” Taylor sighed. Callum chuckled, turning his mask over in his fingers. Taylor’s mask, the one he got from the Vaanti, was sitting next to him on the ground. 

“I mean, I’m an alien superhero who got beat up by my boss, who was also my friend’s dad, after he got juiced up on prism energy,” Callum pointed out. “And then I got sent to another dimension, where I’m apparently from, because said boss blew up. And you’re a being of sentient magic energy that my people worship, but you crashed on earth and became an island only to also give yourself a mortal body which you now permanently inhabit. And that’s not even mentioning the time loop, the other version of yourself, the species that were living on your island, or that my boss’s rival was going to use your power to literally rewrite reality. Our whole lives are complicated.”

“You’re not wrong,” Taylor laughed. He sighed again. Truth be told, he was excited. Excited, relieved, happy, all the positive emotions. This was all he’d wanted since the rooftop when he fused with the rest of Vaanu to save his friends and the rest of the world. But now that they were possibly only days away from getting back…there was something eating at him. Something he’d never really thought about. “I don’t…I don’t know what to do.”

“What do you mean?” Callum prompted. “Like with the rest of the journey to the Prism?”

“No, I mean when we get back to Earth,” Taylor said. He looked away from Callum and instead studied his own hands like the answer would be written somewhere on his skin. “It’s like you said, before the time loop and before I gave myself form I was basically sentient energy. I didn’t even have a life here, and all the memories of life on Earth were completely fake. Even then, I only have a few of those, all from the year leading up to the trip, and all with Diego. I’m not a real person. I know things but I’ve never actually gone to school or gotten a job or been anywhere other than La Huerta.”

“Well, do you have anything you want to do?” Callum wondered. 

“I don’t know that either,” Taylor admitted. “Maybe actually going to college would be nice?”

“There ya go, that’s something,” Callum smiled. “The good thing about college is you go to school and such but you also learn how to be a person at the same time. And, everyone in college is weird and a disaster, so at least you won’t stick out.”

“You sound like you had a great college experience.” 

“I majored in Communications at Ohio University. I wasn’t exactly a party animal either. But I was around, and trust me I saw enough to know college students are just high schoolers with money and more access to alcohol.” 

“I only knew ten college students and honestly that sounds accurate.”

Taylor and Callum shared a laugh like they had many times before. Sometimes it felt like those laughs were the only things keeping them going. This journey they were on together was dark and hard, but even for a moment, it made the tension in their shoulders lighter. It made the shadows just a little bit brighter. 

But then the moment ended. The laughter faded out and the tension came back. The shadows got dark again. The memories and anxieties returned.

“All of that’s just a dream though,” Taylor sighed. Callum frowned and walked around the fire to sit next to Taylor instead. The flames made his eyes look like they were glowing. 

“Why would that just be a dream?” Callum questioned.

“Because I don’t exist,” Taylor said.

“Huh?”

“Legally I mean,” Taylor elaborated. “Rourke couldn’t find a single thing on me except a birthday which I now know was made up. He even thought my birthplace was La Huerta. And like I said, all my memories are fake. I’m not a real person. I don’t have parents or a family or a birth certificate or a diploma or anything. I don’t even have a last name.”

“Then pick one,” Callum shrugged. 

“Just pick a last name,” Taylor repeated.

“Yeah,” Callum nodded. “I mean, you technically picked Taylor, right? I came through a dimensional portal so my mom just picked me a first name and gave me her last name. People change their names all the time whether it’s GNC people, people who need a fresh start, people getting married, whatever. Pick any last name you want and as soon as we get back and deal with all this stuff and we reunite with everyone I’ll help you figure out all the paperwork myself.”

“Just pick a last name…” Taylor hummed as he thought about it. 

He didn’t even know very many last names. Just the common ones and those of his friends. Maybe he could use Vaanu as a last name? That could work he supposed but it didn’t feel quite right. His eyes darted around aimlessly as his brain searched for inspiration but all he saw were crystals, the cave walls, their masks, and his spear. A smile found its way onto his face as he looked at the beautiful flower tied to the spear, the flower he kept preserved with his powers.

“McKenzie,” Taylor finally said. 

“Mckenzie?” Callum replied.

“That’s the name I pick.”

“Taylor McKenzie, huh? I like it.”

“Yeah…me too.”

[sensitivelittlevorta]

Enterprise Season 1 Episode 1 and 2 Broken Bow

1:42-1:50 Dude, that looks uncomfortable. Also, the way he pushed his ass through like he was swimming.

2:06-2:15 what the hell was stored in that thing no way that was just the weapon?! I thought that’s like a silo and there is just food in there?! But no?

2:40 OH MY GOD THE THEME SONG OH MY GOD I LOVE IT. HOW COULD I HAVE FORGOTTEN THAT THEME SONG?!

6:20 Klingot… Gringotts

7:20 Ooooh, the creepy smile doctor

7:45 isn’t dying because of wounds you got in battle but not in the actual battle actually pretty bad for a Klingon and you won’t go to whatever-it-is-called or is it the same? For the norse it is bad, I remember Thor telling Sif that in the fourth Thor movie.

8:22 (this is terrible, because of mouth movement or translating issues of idioms which don’t exist in other cultures they sometimes have to change sentences and they changed ‘knock you on your ass’ to ‘über’s Knie legen’ which literally translates to laying someone over their knees (so you can spank them (in a disciplining way)) but you can imagine what I thought when he figuratively said he wanted to spank her…💀 )

9:18 oooh, soval didn’t like being called out

10:20 Theee dooooooooggggg. Riiiiighthhtkjadk. They had a dog on board in this series!1!!!!1!!!!!!!

14:30 POOOOOOORTHOOOOOOS111!!1111!11!!!111!!111!!!!!!!111!11

18:20 why does the Enterprise have a disc slot…? Although it looks more like a snow shovel in this shot.🤣

20:04 is the Chinese food in San Francisco in 2150 authentic? Is the food there now authentic?

20:25 What do you think is in your normal day food? There’s literally bugshit in some candies. Don’t be so shocked about the droppings of some alien animal to be used as medicine.

21:27 that grin. That godamm grin. Also I think it made Archer doubt his life decisions for a split second

21:28 I remember that scene!

22:50 yeah… I definitely remember that scene… what a funny joke… third hand… funny… why? he doesn’t even have three hands🥲

24:10 I really wonder if we will still eat meat regularly in 2150. The number of people who don’t is rising, but how high will it rise in the next 100 years?

25:04 how many times did she have to try that?! Also, Archer is not impressed but very amused.

31:00 The Vulcans are out there and really think they know everything and are allowed to dictate the humans how to live life. What about meddling with other species? Oh yeah, my bad. That’s only forbidden until the species can use warp drive. After that they can just tell others what to do and what not to do. This really makes me hate Vulcans, but pretty sure that’s wanted, so…, good writing?

31:31 wäääähhhh!

31:46 wääääh. I don’t want to look at that! Please close him up. I don’t care about his lungs.

35:10 those green guys’ skin reminds me of those red rubbery running tracks. Also, I hate it when they speak a different language and require me to look at the screen to read the subtitles, I have no idea what they said in the beginning because I was looking at my phone

36:20 those jackets look awful. Ugly snake leather jackets

37:03 and you just know those Rigellians are smaller than Klingons?

38:45 are they naked? Are they clothed? Are they both?

39:40 gosh. I remember that scene and I am pretty sure I didn’t like it

40:04 please don’t say anything Trip. You have no idea what’s going on.

40:22-40:43 I told you! don’t say anything! If T’Pol says that, then please believe her. And she is right with interfering. Please don’t gimme anymore secondhand embarrassment.

41:03 can you at least give me one thing an enclave can mean?

43:27 pretty sure being bigger than an alien doesn’t mean you’re also stronger than them or that they don’t know how to turn that against you.

43:45 dude what? Why? Girl?! Why? I wouldn’t want to get kissed by some random alien that’s holding me captive… no matter how attractive they seem to be… Especially when she looks completely different after it!

44:09 and very close contact can’t just be skin contact? Like cheek on cheek? Or just hand on hand? Does it need to be the head? Can’t you just hug him? Why does it always have to be something sexual?

46:18 she dead. (also what kinda run was that steppystep over her and then steppysteprun XD)

46:47 you really should remember where you parked your car. My father taught me that since I was little. I thought Vulcans and Humans of the 22nd century should know that.

52:00 Why is this so sexual? I have no idea what they’re talking about because I am too busy feeling unwell because of that sexual massage thing they have going on.

52:25 why did she just shortly smear the cream on his back and then went to his legs? Surely, he is very capable of doing his legs himself. Can you please smear it on his back? Again, shortly back to the back and then suddenly his shoulders and his ears. He can do that himself? Just smear it in a nonsexual way on his back, please?! Now that we can’t see her doing his back, she is doing his back? They just show the sexual parts, yes? And the normal back one is off camera? Of course. And then he just leaves. Are they even allowed to leave yet? (imagine that with Archer and Shran though. In the same weird sexual way, but they just talk normally about their mission and then leave, and the audience is just hungry for more)

53:23 yummy…

53:43 (why are his legs less hairy than his chest? Is that normal? That’s a serious question, I have no knowledge about stuff like that)

45:30 is it logical to do that?

58:45 safety belts seem to be a good idea in general on board of starships. The amount of times people fly out of theirs seats on those series is way too high to not have seatbelts xd

59:49 that’s the Caretaker's array

1:01:20 Hoshi is about to get a panic attack

1:01:30 is that their tractor beam?! When was the tractor beam invented? That’s just two gacha claws on strings? How do you even aim that? If you miss with them, you have to retrieve them and shoot them again. I love it.

1:01:55 is that making fun of themselves because in the other series their displays also look like that?

1:03:38 would it? I thought nothing beats accidentally killing an alien when you just wanted to stun them…

1:03:58 sounds like you have a few squirrels in the controls

1:06:10 how you know that wasn’t killing?

1:11:08 disco!!! Where’s the music though? That was an elevator? Just more reason to wonder where the music was.

1:11:45 *snickers* *snorts* *starts laughing out loud*

1:13:10 why do those people always claim to know more about someone then the person themselves? I mean it makes sense in this setting with timetravel and all that, but in general, why do they think they know more? They can’t look into their heads, so why do they say that? Just to impress or frighten the other? I would be neither impressed nor frightened. Although I would be frightened to be in those situations in general 😅

1:15:10 is the timethingie going on in there also changing the way sound moves or why can’t neither of them locate the other by the origin of their voice?

1:15:25 that looked like it should have crushed his skull

1:16:00 eeeww

1:15:49-1:16:05 first scene: green running track guy has a strange hold on Archers uniform

                second scene: green running track guy suddenly has Archer in a strange chokehold

                third scene: green running track guy suddenly doesn’t have Archer in a strange chokehold anymore

1:16:25 same. I would be glad to be in one piece too. His face and hands though

Absolute shock on his face of having been beamed and he's still in one piece.

1:17:48 that smile…

1:18:13 The information is in his DNA?! That is small. Very small.

1:18:47 but I want to know what he said?! Tell me, Hoshi!

1:18:54 POOOOORHTOOOOOS. Awwww, his little tail is wagging so hard it’s just a ‘woosh’. Little baby boy.

[deadpuppetboi]

Goretober Day 3: Jaw

There are four types of websites on the internet.

1. Regular: Regular: News articles, profile pages, and even forums discussing what was what and why. Anyone has access to such a thing.

2. Strange: Websites that cater to specific groups, such as children's shows or people's unusual interests. Take a few spins and you'll find the specific websites in the far corner.

3. Absurd: The similar websites, but catered to the ridiculous and delusory, most likely conspiracy theories ranging from aliens to Bigfoot. Ranging from the most remote regions, the ludicrous would be discovered after traveling through a few weird websites.

4. Illegal: Snuff videos, purchasing illegal substances, and discussing information that no sane person would communicate with another. If you're not careful, the men in blue might come around to inspect if the search bar was correct.

Harold would not describe himself as an expert; rather, he was an observer.

He had his fair share of watching both the most heinous and the cutest sections of the internet on the same day. Whatever caught his interest in what he watched, complete video, no pausing, and fully immersed himself in the experience from start to finish. Any other teenager his age would puke at the sight of a man being skinned alive, but Harold would merely watch while eating a fatty cheeseburger.

Tonight was just like any other.

Surfing the web on his computer, idly clicking on anything grabbed his eye and eating whatever greasy junk food was on his dirty desk. His room was disorganized, with crumpled papers and debris strewn around, all lighted by the computer screen. Harold hadn't been bothered by the mess, telling himself he'd pick up after himself when he had enough time.

But, if he was being honest, he just lacked the motivation to do so.

Harold sniffed as he moved his mouse to a search bar above. He typed in a URL he'd seen dozens of times before, his thoughts fixed on what he could see next. He considered one site but changed his mind after watching all the videos and participating in the forums with like-minded folks.

A good friend of his told him about this site months ago, and he used his account to go through the passcode and stuff like that. The grown man took a little break while typing in the URL to sip his drink before finishing it.

‘Valient-ent.tv’

When he pressed enter, the computer blurred for a second before clearing up to reveal a familiar warning.

‘WARNING!

THIS SITE IS FOR ADULTS ONLY AND CONTAINS DISTURBING MATERIAL. IF YOU ARE UNDER THE LEGAL AGE, YOU MUST LEAVE NOW.’

Harold scoffed and entered the information by clicking on the username and password. When he was completed, he clicked on the small 'terms and conditions' box and pressed enter, finally gaining access to the website.

Valiant Video Enterprises is one of the most popular websites for watching, distributing, and purchasing snuff films in any format.

While Harold hasn't purchased anything from the website (30 dollars for a plastic bag is ridiculous), he has browsed the many forums and viewed a film or two. Tonight, though, he arrived early, his gaze drawn to the huge and colorful words in the center of the page.

‘LIVE: TEACHING SUM FUCKERZ SUM MANNERZ’

Harold clicked on the LIVE button, his computer trying to keep up with the quality before finally displaying the video.

The scenario in front of him was typical, but with a twist. Two battered guys his age were tied up and sitting on metal chairs, both with new and old injuries. One was sobbing, while the other was threatening the men behind the camera with whatever threat they could think of.

But it wasn't them that Harold was looking forward to seeing; it was the man who appeared out of nowhere and strode into the scene that piqued his curiosity.

“Oh, boys, why did it have to come to this?”

A man clothed completely in leather and latex walked out of the darkness, a big and white smile shining through the terrible quality. He was dressed in heavy leather boots lined with black and red, a coat with the same color variation, belts wrapped around each limb, and each corner was as sharp and exact as his nails. The man's face was entirely hidden by his costume, so there was no way of knowing who he was. Apart from the pinpricks of his eye holes in his mask, the only thing visible was his dazzling white teeth.

The man sporting such attire is named Mr. Nasty.

One of the most significant figures in the snuff film industry, his efforts paved the door for expansion not just from one country to the next. Profiting millions off his crazy thoughts and attracting the attention of both the sane and the insane. His heinous crimes landed him on the FIB's most-wanted list; among other criminals, his work is regarded as the worst of all.

Mr. Nasty placed his hands on the men's shoulders, causing them to scream in terror. He laughed as he tenderly padded their shaved heads, sensing their unwillingness to go through another session.

“I thought we had a genuine connection here. A real one. Not one of those fucked up fake ones you see on tv generally targeted towards the young teen demographic.”

He snatched each of their heads and drew them close to his, creating a pouty face as the two men apologized. Mr. Nasty looked over from behind the camera as if attempting to attract the attention of the men behind the camera.

“I really thought we had a connection, honestly, I thought we did.”

After looking down at the camera and witnessing the blinking red, he smiled and went forward into view. He knelt, his face neatly placed up against the camera, and smiled wide and triumphantly.

“Hi everyone.”

Harold eventually saw the chat beside the live broadcast and clicked on it to join the online chat. He smiled at the other remarks that immediately piled in while making a fast note to type up his response.

humperdick: Finally, something I can look forward to.

Rod_Wood: Fresh meat to squeeze! Make ‘em squirm!

captain nemo: Take their shoes off.

“Fuckin’ weirdos,” Harold muttered as he typed in his comment.

@@@l33tdo0d@@@: What did they do this time?

A voice from the other side of the camera piped out, informing Mr. Nasty of the comments that were made. Mr. Nasty appeared content, but not as glad as he was to answer Harold's inquiry, swiftly rising to his feet and returning to the two men.

“What did they do?! My Lord, I can't answer that, these two need to answer for themselves!”

The latex man gripped the two men's shoulders again, this time sharp nails grasping their skin to catch their attention.

“Please, gentlemen, tell the wonderful viewers back home what the fuck you both did to piss me off! They’re dying to know!”

One of the men continued to cry, while the other maintained his cool and spat at the masked man.

“Man, fuck you, we didn't do shit!”

Mr. Nasty was taken aback and looked down at the man.

“You didn't do shit?”

He scoffed, glancing at the camera, and pointed at the man.

“You hear that boys and girls, he didn't do shit!”

He splayed his palms in the air, emulating his astonished expression, before his arm snapped to the side. Fist clenched, brass knuckles slamming the man's threats away, wrenching his head to the side as his jaw involuntarily closed on his tongue. The man let out a quick gasp, coughing up blood as his tongue bled freely from overbiting.

Before he could finish his sentence, he was hit again, this time right in the nose, a sharp crack emanating from the assault alone.

“Bull fucking shit you didn't do shit! You both exactly knew what you did and I'm not going to speak up for you both like I'm your fucking parents. You’re grown-ass men, act like it, dammit, and tell the truth!”

Nasty yelled, grabbed the man's head, and pulled him up to face him. The man on the opposite side exclaimed, yelling his response.

"We'd know if you just told us what we did! We've never seen you before, believe me!"

Nasty turned to face the bereaved guy, and Harold watched as he muttered and snapped his fingers.

“God, I have to do everything myself-”

Two masked men walked in, pushing bloodied stainless steel trolleys into view. Nasty stepped forward and picked out the weapons on the two men as they began to struggle.

“Well, I guess I just need to keep digging through those empty heads of yours to get you to think! But, I've used up all my options, I believe that the viewers should be the ones to pick out what to do tonight!”

The chat quickly became animated as they typed in their requests for what could be done to the two males. A few people inquired as to what brought these two men together in this chamber, but their questions were drowned by the others' desire to see the carnage.

Nasty laughed at every request until he read Harold's.

@@@l33tdo0d@@@: They must’ve talked shit about you Nasty, maybe they need to eat shit to realize what they've done to you.

Harold paused before typing in another comment.

@@@l33tdo0d@@@: Honestly, now that I think about it, not even shit could change their mind! I think they need their jaws rearranged to make them understand what they've done.

Nasty laughed, his sharp claws scraping the weapons in front of him, while the two men shook their heads and repeated apologies after apology. But that didn't appear to change the man's mentality, as his free hand continued to tap away at the stainless steel trolleys. He began to babble to himself in an almost hypnotic rhythm as he examined the weapons in front of him.

Harold turned up the volume to hear Nasty speak.

“I tried the hammer before. Scissors can only go so far. Pliers don't do much either.”

Nasty then snapped his fingers and had a eureka moment before beginning to search through the weaponry in front of him. He clicked his tongue a few times before grabbing the weapon and holding it up in the air for all to see.

While the other two men were perplexed by the thing, Harold recognized it and laughed.

“Oh, shit-”

“Wha-what is that?” One of the men inquired, staring at the equipment and attempting to make sense of it in his head.

“This, boys and girls, is called The Pear of Anguish!” Mr. Nasty answered, holding the pear-like device in his hands. “This baby was used often in medieval times, as a proper torture device, it was used to punish those of all kinds. Women, liars, non-believers, and most dreadful of all: Homosexuals.”

There was the sound of laughter from behind the camera, Mr. Nasty joining in as he stepped back and stood behind the two men.

“Now, if you don't know, The Pear of Anguish was used in two ways to garner its name. You see these four metal leaves here?” The man twisted the device's end to widen the metal leaves, revealing the sharp twisted metal from behind. Harold could see the device plainly even with the poor quality.

“They expand by a simple twist of my hand, now I want you to realize the goal isn't to puncture the flesh but rather stretch it. And I know what you may be asking. Mr. Nasty, where in God’s holy name and the domain would you put The Pear of Anguish?”

Mr. Nasty gave out another laugh, moving over towards the man who spat at him earlier.

“Boys and girls, you must know that the human race were ever so creative with their ideas on how to get answers out of one another. With this particular device, however, there were only certain places where it would be placed to gather the worst possible anguish known to man!”

He drew the device across the bloodied man's cheeks, making him cringe.

“The mouth and in the anus, and honestly, it doesn't take a scientist to put two and two together to know what happens next, does it?”

Harold's gaze wandered over to the conversation, which appeared to have figured out how the device operated. Their enthusiasm improved the ratings, and even more individuals joined in right before the show began. It was then that the men realized what was going to happen to them as well.

They each shook their heads, pleading for aid as they strained in their bindings. Nasty ignored their protests and seized the man's jaw, pressing his fingers in as he forced it open and inserted the gadget from inside. Nasty grabbed the man's neck and yanked him up.

“Hold still, baby, I need you still for this one.”

Nasty locked the gadget in place while the man sobbed uncontrollably. He started to apologize again, but he coughed as Nasty grabbed the end of the device and twisted it violently by the wrist. The metal flaps began to open forcefully, bracing the man's jaw wide open as his worries became a reality.

"Stop!" shouted the other man, "Stop this, God!"

Nasty shook his head, twisting the device yet again, prompting the man in front of him to open his mouth even wider.

“I’m not sure, should I keep going, my beautiful viewers?”

The discussion urged Nasty to continue, with people leaving comments and cheering to watch the vile and despicable gore. Nasty smiled and returned his attention to the man, offering him a simple shrug.

“Well, the people have said it, I have no responsibility for what I may do next!” The masked man then grasped the end of the gadget and twisted it violently, causing the victim to cry out in pain.

“Open wide~”

With each twist, his jaw seemed to expand more than it should. Fresh saliva dripped down his lower lip, his tongue smacking the gadget ineffectively as it grew. As the device ripped into his skin, the man yelled, his teeth clamping and groaning as the pressure grew. He tried to move away, only to have his gums bleed and his teeth fall out of their proper place.

His scream was similar to the others, but in Harold's opinion, it was exactly what he had hoped to hear from the start.

Flesh ripped like paper, blood spilled like a torrent, and bones snapped under pressure. No words could express the man's suffering at this particular moment, his body trembling slightly as his eyes rolled at the back of his head. He choked on his blood, fighting to breathe as he clutched for any mouth of air and his jaw began to break with another twist of the gadget within his mouth.

Mr. Nasty moved back, exposing the scene to the cameras in front of him, when he had gone as far as the device could go. The untouched man continued to scream, most likely to his now dead comrade, pleading for pity as he sobbed futilely. He screamed as Nasty yanked the device from the dying man, watching as his broken jaw bungled over itself, exposing flesh and bone and spewing blood like no other.

Nasty stood tall and proud, returning the equipment to its original form while singing a song to himself and inspecting the gore left on it.

"Oh, now isn't that beautiful?"

He angled the bleeding gadget to one side, allowing the light to shine on it.

"It's art, I'm telling you, it is."

He gently approached the distraught man, his smile never leaving his face. He tapped the bloodied device on the man's chest, causing him to flinch and wail even more.

"I'm sorry," he grumbled, "I'm so sorry." I am. I'm very sorry."

Nasty ignored the man's cries, feeble apologies, and ineffective excuses. He let him speak, keeping a close eye on his anguished expression while tapping the device on his chest. Nasty leaned in close, lovingly caressing the man's head back as he dried his tears with his thumb.

"This is what happens when you cut someone off on the freeway."

For a few seconds, the man appeared perplexed before his eyes widened, absolute disbelief written across his face. But before he could adequately respond, Nasty jumped to his feet and turned to face the cameras, chuckling.

“Now,” he said in a booming voice, “Who wants to see The Pear of Anguish on the other end of the line?!”

As the chatter grew louder, the man yelled out in response, and Mr. Nasty called in men to put the man in place, Harold yawned. He blinked slowly as the man was released from his bindings, only to be tossed onto the table, laying on his stomach, his garments ripped off by a simple grab and pull.

Harold paused the live feed as the camera panned to the man's terrified expression on his distraught face, taking a moment to stretch. He yawned again, looked at the time, realized it was late, clicked his tongue, and looked at his computer.

Harold then exited the website, shut down his computer, and grudgingly rose from his creaking seat, taking just two steps before collapsing onto his filthy bed.

That's enough internet for tonight.