#sam who watched old war movies with him

[godmadeaterribleerror]

There Comes a Breaking Point

Main Masterlist - Dean Masterlist

Read on A03!

Tags: Dean Winchester/Female Reader, smut (p in v sex, handjobs, face sitting), light angst, light fluff too, humor, love confession, truth serum.

Summary/Warnings: Sam drinks a truth potion, and you and Dean have to deal with the consequences, and very painful and beautiful revelations.

Author's Note: Request from @youdontknowe! Tormented Sam so bad last time I had people advocating for his release.

Word Count: 6.1k

This is going to be a problem. You don’t have to look at Dean’s tensed body and scowl to know that this is going to be a problem.

“Run it over one more time, Sammy, and explain why the hell you thought this was a good idea.”

Sam sighs, and he’s spent the past hour looking a little bit like a child that just got caught eating sharpies to see if the different colors had different flavors.

This isn’t that.

It’s worse.

“It was thirsty,” he mutters. “And it doesn’t hurt. It’s kind of tingly on my brain, but it actually feels pretty good, dude. Like an orgasm-“

“Sam.” You mutter. “We talked about this. Don’t poke the bear.”

“But the bear was asking to be poked, and you poke the bear all the time-“

You shake your head. “That’s different-“

“Right, cause he loves you-“

You flush, right as Dean lets out a cough that could rival thunder.

“I- I’m not- Shut your fucking face, Sam, and get the hell back on topic-“

“I’m sorry, but I can’t not say it.” Sam looks back to you with a desperate plea of your name. “You know I can’t, I’m trying but it’s literally impossible-“

“Then try fucking harder-“

“Dean.” You place your hand over his—gripping the chair in the war room like he’s struggling not to throw it at the wall, and knowing him, he might be—until he looks at you.

Sam had said earlier that Dean goes gooey when he looks at you. You’d told him you didn’t know what that means, and he’d tried to make a mimicking face of it, but mostly just ended up looking like an idiot.

And you hadn’t believed him. Sam may have been right in his brutal you always know what Dean needs before he asks for it observation, but that was because you’d trained yourself to do that. To take care of him, when nobody else does, or ever has. It had become your silent purpose, because Dean may stitch you up after every hunt and make sure you eat every night, but you’re the one who takes all the harsher blows on purpose, and who does his laundry—and Sam’s, but they both seem to think a shirt is wearable right up until you get blood on it, and that simply cannot be the bar—and puts water on his nightstand after a worse day, because you know he’s going to drink and you don’t want him to get a headache. 

Apparently, Sam’s noticed all of that. And you’d been alright with it—you didn’t really try to hide how you do that—right up until he added that he knows you bake those pies instead of buying them at the store, and that you hate old movies but watch them because Dean likes them, and that that shampoo and conditioner in the Dean’s showers hasn’t just been magically replacing itself like he thinks.

“How the fuck do you know that one?” You’d muttered, and Sam had just shrugged.

“Because I use my own shampoo and conditioner, duh. And it’s expensive, so if there was a secret shampoo wizard in the bunker, I wouldn’t have to order new stuff online every month.” Sam had paused for a few seconds, making an almost adorable, puppy-like face of shock at the air. “Huh. That feels good to admit. I can finally stop hiding my orders.”

You’d stared at him. “You order stuff to the bunker?”

“No, I have a secret P.O box. Separate from our group one.”

“You what-“

“I don’t want to grab another one of your dildos on accident.” He’d wrinkled his nose at the air. “That was traumatizing, by the way. But not as bad as getting Dean’s porn magazines, I- There was one whole edition that was just photos of girls that looked like you, I think he had it custom made-“

“Sam.” You’d whispered, a little worried that—if he kept going—you’d burn yourself alive. “Please shut up.”

“I can’t. I’m trying, but it just keeps coming out.”He’d pouted at you. “What the hell was in that thing? I mean, I feel great, but wow it’s strong. I think I’m gonna go call Eileen and tell her I love her-“

You’d used the full weight of your body to slam him back down into his chair. “Do not do that, Sam-“

“Why, I thought you guys loved her too-“

“Because,” you’d sighed, rubbing at your eyes as you spoke. “If you call Eileen, you’re probably going to tell her you’re proposing next month. And I don’t think you want to do that.”

“Oh. Good call.” Sam had stayed seated, but frowned at you all the same. “Is Dean headed back?”

You’d glanced down to your phone. “Yeah, he should be. Said he would, but I didn’t explain what was happening, so maybe he got distracted-“

Sam had snorted. “If you asked him to come back, he’s not getting distracted by anything.”

“What does that mean-“

“He’s obsessed with you,” Sam had rolled his eyes, leaning back in his chair. “I mean, you’re like a sister to me, and-“

“I’m like a sister to Dean, too.” You’d muttered, your tone a lot more bitter than you’d wanted, and Sam had only scoffed.

“No. He loves you. Actually, I love you, but Dean’s in love with you.”

You’d shaken your head, and tried to work out how you could literally sink into the earth.  ““Sam-“

“It’s annoying,” he’d half-whined your name, like this was somehow actually your problem to fix. “All the time he’s just looking at you, and talking about you, and moping about how you flirt with other men at bars-“

You’d frowned at him. “I don’t flirt at bars. At all.”

“I know, cause you love him, and I’ve tried to tell him that but suddenly the asshole’s all good with a life of celibacy.” Sam had let out a loud, dramatic sigh, and you’d snorted.

“Dean is not celibate.”

“He is now. Why’d you think he’s been so grumpy all the time.”

“Cause he’s Dean-“

“Nah, this is worse than usual. You just don’t notice cause he’s still all mushy and sweet with you.” 

“Fucking- Sam-“

“It was a little better when he was still masturbating.” Sam had hummed. “But then I walked in on him shouting your name, and now he doesn’t. I’m kind worried it’s gonna kill him.”

You’d just stared at Sam, unable to find words that weren’t pleas to either be shot or woken up from this half-nightmare, half-daydream, and Sam had just kept fucking talking.

“And he makes this face!” Sam had shouted, and you’d considered finding a very firm book in the library to beat your own head in with.

Even now, as you and Sam explained the situation to Dean, the brain bashing was very much still on the table. Because if you looked really close, you could see something shift in Dean’s expression when he met your eyes.

But that might just be the exhaustion. It’s been a pretty average day, but a long fucking three hours.

“He can’t help it.” You mutter, nodding your head to Sam. “We just have to ride it out until Rowena picks up the phone.”

Dean’s jaw ticks, and Sam clears his throat, his voice soft and careful.

“If it helps,” he mumbles your name, giving you an apologetic look. “She’s the one who put the potion there.”

“Sam.” You hiss. “Why would that help-“

“He doesn’t get mad at you!” Sam’s whining voice was back, and you’re a little worried the potion has done something to his general brain functions as well. “And who the hell leaves something like that in the fridge-“

“Me! I leave it there, because Rowena said it needs to be refrigerated Dean knows not to drink it, and you always ask for a nutrition breakdown!”

“But I was thirsty-“

“Sammy.” Dean grumbles, running a hand over his face. “Don’t yell at her.”

“I- She yelled at me-“

“I know, Sammy. Still don’t yell at her. And,” Dean mutters your name, a slight amusement on his face. That’s a good sign. Dean doesn’t really do amused when he’s really angry. “Take a page from your own book. He can’t help it.”

You roll your eyes. “Shove up your ass, Winchester.”

“That’s not nice, sweetheart-“

“It’s nicer than the other place I’d tell you to shove it.” You mumble, and Dean stares at you for a long second, the cutest confusion you’ve ever seen written all over his face.

“Uh,” he scratches the back of his neck. “Unless you’re planning to like, cut me open, I don’t really have any other holes-“

“You’ve got one other hole.” 

You can see the moment it hits him, and you don’t bother to hide your giggle at the slack shock in his face.

“Son of a- Jesus fuckin’ Christ,” he says your name, shaking his head like he’s trying to physically remove the idea and moving a hand to cover his crotch. “I should let you take the lead on the interrogations some time, you’re-“

"Amazing?” You hum, smiling at him in a slightly manic way you’ve long forgotten how to fight in Dean’s presence. “Perfect? A miracle and blessing on the universe-“

“Terrifying.” Dean cuts you off with a grin. “Little Dean’s gonna have a heart attack-“

“Yeah, cause you have a boner, man.” Sam groans, and you whip to see him making a face of disgust at you and Dean. “Shit, could she like, wade through cow shit and you’d still get hard?”

“Sam.” Dean grunts, and Sam just rolls his eyes.

“No, don’t Sam me, you guys were just eye-banging, right in front of me. It’s so gross-“

“Sam-“

Dean’s warnings continue to be ignored, and the brain bashing become more and more of a viable option.

“Dean, I’ve seen you get hard cause she threatened to punch you, and I mean like, fine, but you were sitting next to me in the booth, man. I couldn’t get up, or the whole diner would see. And you,” he waves a loose hand in your direction. “Are just as bad! I’ve see the drool when he takes off his shirt, and you laugh way too much at his jokes. I love you, dude, I do, but you are not half as funny as you think you are.”

Dean’s scowl doesn’t waver. “Sammy, I’m gonna knock your lights out if you keep talking.”

“Sure, whatever, just go have sex after. I can’t fucking take this anymore, you keep making heart eyes at each other while I’m eating. It’s exhausting.”

You’re going to sink into the earth. Or turn into sheer air, or run and never stop until you drop dead, and you’re reborn as a bug all the way across the world. 

Dean’s walking away. He might want to hear this even less than you do, because at least for you it’s a little true. For Dean, it’s just Sam losing his mind.

It has to just be Sam losing his mind.

You’ve spent too many years telling yourself that Dean simply doesn’t love you back, and that’s okay, for it not to be Sam losing his mind-

“You should follow him.” Sam says, and you sigh, shaking your head.

“He needs space, Sam-“

“No, he needs you.”

You swallow. It’s just Sam losing his mind.

Sam says your name carefully. “I know-“

“I’m going to bed.” The words aren’t really for Sam. They’re not really for anybody. It’s mostly just an order for your legs to start moving.

You’ll work on this in the morning, or your phone will ring in the dead of night with an answer from Rowena. Until then, you’ll wallow. Sit in the fact that things are going to be weird now, and they’ll get better, but God, the middle part is going to suck.

It’s not like you’ve never tried to do something about your feelings. There have been points where you’d had too much to drink, or the hunt had been really good, or Dean had been touching you a lot, all day, for almost no reason. And you’d smiled at him extra, and fluttered your lashes, and looked nowhere but his grin and handsome features, but he’s never done anything. You’ve even had cases where you’ve had to pretend to be a couple, and Dean has looked at you with dark eyes and a teasing smirk, but then things would get weird, and you’d be struck with the knowledge once more that it was nothing.

The touches were nothing, and the days he’d only ever look at you were nothing, and no matter how bad you wanted it to be something, it wasn’t. 

You can’t sleep. You can’t manage to banish the image of Dean laying in his bed, with his hand stroking his cock as he shouts your name, and it’s making the sheets stick to your skin and you thighs squeeze together, but it’s just an image in your head. 

Hours pass, and the image gets sharper and you can only grind into the sheets and beg to nothing for the night to move quickly, but it doesn’t. If anything you’re more awake, and now you’ve shifted to being on the table in the war room, and instead of Dean storming out when Sam tells you that you love each other, he agrees and grabs your face between big, rough hands. Kissing you until your knees are weak and you’re clinging to his shirt, before bending you over the table and fucking you stupid.

But it’s just a fantasy. Based in nothing at all.

No matter what Sam says, it’s nothing.

Even though Sam does know Dean better than anyone. And he’s only saying what he thinks is the truth, which is—allegedly and unlikely—that Dean masturbates and shouts your name, and the magazine thing, and that you eye fuck each other, and you know you eye fuck Dean, but never once has Dean ever looked at you different from the first day he met you-

Sam cuts through your thoughts, shouting of your name from down the hall, and you bolt out of bed without thought.

“I need help- Shit-“

It’s coming from Dean’s room, and if Sam went to try and smooth things out Dean might be strangling him, and he wouldn’t actually hurt Sam but you’re still so worried the air feels wired-

You skid into Dean’s room with wide eyes, Dean jolts up from his bed—very much alone—and before either of you can speak, the door slams closed.

“Son of a-“ Dean pushes up off the mattress, his eyes narrowed at the door. “Sammy? What the hell do you think you’re doing-“

“A plan.” Sam’s voice is muffled from behind the door, and when you try to shake the handle, it doesn’t budge.

“Dean.” You mutter, look back over your shoulder. “It’s locked. Why the fuck does it lock from the outside-“

“Old Mark of Cain precaution,” he grunts, moving to your side with short steps. “Sam, open the goddamn door now.”

There’s a second of silence, then Sam’s firm. “No.”

“Sam-“

“No! I’m not doing this for another three years!” Sam’s voice is almost desperate, and you and Dean both freeze. “You know you love each other now! Work it out! And I’m sorry I spilled your secrets, that wasn’t cool, but c’mon guys, this was getting insane.”

“Sam.” You wrap your arms around your body, and he better feel the venom in your voice. “You said you needed help. This is not help. You lied, so-“

“Potion wore off. Guess I can lie again.” There’s a pause. “But I wasn’t lying when I said you guys need to get this together. Remember the vamp hunt last month?”

You frown at the door. “Yeah?”

“One of the vamps was shocked you weren’t together!” Sam groans, sounding almost pained by the memory. “You guys were out double checking the nest location after we interrogated her, and she made a joke about how my mom and dad were probably fucking in the car or something, and I told her that you guys weren’t together, and she said, and I quote, really.”

“Sam.” Dean’s voice is growl. It’s not helping the situation. “I’m going to fucking kill you.”

“Cool. Do it after you guys are done.”

“Done?” You glance over at Dean, and he’s refusing to meet your gaze. Just glowering at the door. “Sam, what do we have to be done with.”

“Working it out.”

You sigh. “That’s not-“

“Fine. Fucking. You’re not coming out until you fuck.”

Your mouth falls open, and Dean looks like—if he really tried—he could break down the door and strangle Sam with his bare hands.

“I swear to Mother Mary and Christ, Sam, you’re fuckin’ dead-“

“Sure. After you fuck.”

Dean slams a fist on the door, and it almost drowns out the sound of Sam’s footsteps.

Walking away.

Leaving you locked with Dean.

You swallow on the air, and Dean still won’t look at you. Won’t speak to you, or do anything but glare at the door as if he can free himself with his mind. You must have done something wrong to make Sam hate you, because this is torture. Dean obviously doesn’t want to be in here with you, let alone fuck you or love you. Even when you move to sit on the bed he remains tall and rigid and frozen, and you can see the muscles of his back flexing, and that’s really not important to think about right now-

“I’m sorry.” You mumble, and when Dean responds, his words sound pushed through his teeth.

“No. You’re- This isn’t your problem. He’ll come back later, and we can lie to him about doing it, and then I’ll fucking kill him.”

The last words are roared for Sam to hear wherever he’s retreated off to, and you let out a long, slow sigh.

“I don’t think shouting is going to convince him to come back and free you.”

He finally looks at you. A quick glance over his shoulder with a drawn brow, still igniting a fire over your skin. Always igniting a fire over your skin. 

“I don’t give a shit if he frees me.” He grunts. “He shouldn’t be doing this to you. Doesn’t matter what he thinks he knows.”

You blink at that, and it’s like you’re missing something. Dean’s words make sense, but there’s something so slightly off about them, and you can’t place it. 

“Truth potion.” You shrug, watching Dean carefully. “Not his fault.”

Dean scoffs. “This is his fault, sweetheart. And that thing wasn’t a truth potion, it was a big-mouthed potion.”

“I think that’s just a mean way of saying truth potion.”

“Yeah, well, I’ve earned the right to be mean. My brother’s a fucking traitor-“

“Dean.”

“Yeah. I know.” 

“Right.” You mumble. “Sorry.”

He glances back to you with a firm expression that-

Softens. It softens. There’s not eye fucking, but you can see it happen. His jaw unclenches, and his nostrils flare with a long exhale, and his eyes turn gooey.

The lack of sleep might be catching up to you.

Or Sam is right.

You really hope Sam is right.

“Don’t be.” Dean mutters, crossing the room and dropping at your side. “Not your fault Sammy’s a little shit who only see what he wants.”

“What he wants?”

Dean nods, and that all you get.

You just need a little more.

“Sam told me you haven’t been sleeping with other people.” You whisper. “Was that just- Sam being a shit?”

Dean sighs, shooting you an unreadable look. “No. I haven’t been.”

You swallow. “Why?”

Dean lets out a dry chuckle, and you can taste the air. Feel the heat from his body, right next to yours, and smell him all over the room. Whiskey and gunpowder and something salty that’s just Dean.

And he chuckles—his voice impossibly low—and looks at you the same as he always has. 

And you see it again. What Sam was talking about

The hunger, in his hooded gaze, that’s lighting a fire in your gut. 

All it takes to turn it to a wildfire is his voice, deep and rough as he holds your gaze, God, you might be the one losing their mind, but if it’s for this, you’re happy to let it go.

“Sweetheart,” he drawls, scanning carefully over your already open, slack features. “I’m betting Sam told you why, too.”

For a second, you’re only staring at each other as Dean’s words hang in the air.

And Sam had been telling the truth. You can see it all over Dean’s face, and you’re sure he can see it on yours—and if he can’t, he can hear it, pounding in your heartbeat—and something in you snaps.

You must be the one who moves first. Just a fraction of a second faster than Dean, because you end up straddling him as he holds you by the waist, and this is what you’ve waited for.

Years of sleepless nights and watching Dean move without grabbing him by the shirt and smashing your lips to his with a scream of I love you. So much time spent daydreaming and getting lost in your own head to thoughts of this moment, and you’re here, and there’s nothing else in the world.

It’s only Dean. His hands pulling and kneading at the skin of your hips and ass, and his mouth desperate and sloppy against yours as you both try to devour the other first. All teeth and spit and need, you need Dean and he needs you, and you can feel his need pressing right into your inner thigh, and exploding is back on the table but it might be into fireworks-

You’re separating only for breath. Just enough for Dean to pull your shirt over your head and drop his head to your neck as you unbutton his flannel—why was he sleeping in flannel, that’s so fucking weird, he’s perfect—and leaning back once more to let you drag his undershirt off and toss it to the side. There’s too much time lost to wait. You push your hand between your bodies—pressed right against each other, your hips already rolling down as your own desperation grows—and it’s only right as your fingers lands on the rim of Dean’s sweatpants that he picks up on what’s happening. 

“Wait-“ He grunts your name, pulling away as he grabs your hand, but keeping his hold on your body steady. “You don’t need to-“

“But I want to.” You whisper, giving him your best, softest doe-eyes. “Please.”

“Son of a- Sweetheart, you really don’t-“

“Please.” You grind down onto him, and he grunts in your ear. “I promise I want to Dean, I- I mean only if you want to-“

Dean’s hand wraps around the back of your hand so carefully as he slams his lips up to yours, and your words die in a long, happy moan as he ruts up into your thighs. 

“I love you,” he mutters, and you giggle against his lips.

“I love you, too. Is that a yes-“

He chuckles. “You can have a little, sweetheart.” He starts to press short kisses over your collarbone before nipping at your shoulder, his words rolling through your body until you’re squirming against him. “But then I wanna taste you, and come inside of you, alright. I-“ He pauses, glancing up with a small frown. “If you’re good with that. I know I’m clean, and if you are too, and wanna do that, I’m all in, so-“

It’s your turn to shut him up. He groans down your throat as you pull his lower lip between your teeth, squeezing right over his bulge until he’s making more of those sounds, and they might be all you need to survive for a million years.

And the hiss and moan he lets out when you lean back and pull his sweats and boxers down, taking his hard cock in your hand and giving it a long slow stroke, might send you right to heaven.

You don’t think you’ll want it. Nowhere could be better than here. Pumping Dean in your hands carefully, feeling the ache between your legs grow as you start to imagine him—thick and big and throbbing—seated between your thighs. Watching him drop his brow to your chest with a low groan, quickly making himself busy by kissing and sucking over your breasts.

“Dean.” Your hand shoots into his hair, and he moans again. Right against your nipple, as his hips jerk up into your hand, and you squeeze right at the base of his dick. “That’s- Oh, that’s good-“

He only groans, a hand gripping so hard on your waist it’s going to leave a bruise. 

You really hope it does.

“Baby,” Dean mutters, and that alone almost sends you right up to the edge. “Gotta slow down, getting- son of a bitch-“

It’s impossible not to speed it up. To not began to pick up your pace until Dean’s biting your shoulder, making more of those sounds-

“Alright. That’s enough.“ Dean pulls you off with a grunt, eyes blown out, and hair messy from your fingers, and his voice is gruff and low and you want to keep touching him-

“Dean.” Your voice is almost a whine as he fully removes his bottoms, and you crawl over to prop your chin on his shoulder. “We can have sex later-“

That gets a loud, barking laugh. “There’s no damn way we’re having sex later, sweetheart. I told you, I’m gonna taste you, then I’m gonna fuck you till you can’t walk.”

Suddenly, the plan sounds good again. You nod frantically as Dean grins at you and presses a quick, affectionate kiss to your brow, but when you start to lie back for the tasting part, Dean stops you.

“Not like that, baby girl.” He mutters, pulling you back into a longer, slower kiss, and you give him a slightly dazed blink as when he pulls away.

“But you said-“

“I know. Gimme a sec.” He crawls back on the mattress, settling his head between the pillows. “C’mere.”

You blink at him. “Dean, I don’t-“

Your words cut off with a squeak as he grabs your leg, dragging you forwards and positioning until you’re sitting right on his chest.

When all you do is stare at him, combing your fingers thoughtlessly through his hair as you wait for him to explain, Dean pauses.

“You ever done this?”

“I don’t know what this is-“

“Face-sitting.” 

Your mouth falls open, and he chuckles.

“Guess not. You’re gonna love it, baby, I promise. C’mon.” 

His hands find your ass, and your senses finally rush back into your body.

“Dean, wait-“

He stops before the word is even fully out of your mouth, a small frown on his pretty face. “What’s wrong, do you not wanna-“

“No, I do-“

“Cause if you don’t, I’ll survive sweetheart, you just gotta tell me-“

“Dean!” You squeak, grabbing his face between your hands. “I want to, I do, I promise, but I- I only just got you, I don’t want to kill you night one.”

Dean stares at you for a second, and his face breaks out in a wide, bright grin. “Night one? You already planning more nights?”

“I- yes, and I’d like you be alive for them.”

He shrugs. “Well if that’s your problem, I can promise I’ll make it. Sit on my fucking face, sweetheart. Now.”

His voice is deep and firm with the command, and it’s almost enough to make you forget about the crushing him fears. 

You only just manage to push through.

“I don’t want to hurt you, Dean-“

“You won’t-“

“But-“

Dean says your name carefully, squeezing his hands on your ass. “I can tell you right now, I’m going to enjoy this. I’ve been waiting for it for years.” 

“Oh.” You whisper. “Okay.”

He nods. “I’m more than game if you are. But if you’re not-“

“I am.” 

Your answer is too quick, and Dean doesn’t miss it. “Alright then. Hold on.”

A quick wink is all your get before he’s pulling you forward, right onto his face, and-

“Fuck.”

Dean chuckles, licking another long, teasing stripe up your pussy, and your hand shoots out to grab his headboard. Any doubt from your head is gone is second, replaced only by good. This feels so good, with Dean’s hands squeezing and lightly slapping on your ass with every moan, and his grunts as you grip at his hair vibrating right into you cunt, and his mouth-

His mouth needs to come with a warning. Some kind of biohazard, because all he’d need to do now is ask you to move a mountain, and you would. 

Nobody should be this good at eating pussy. It shouldn’t be legal. But Dean does it like it’s nothing, keeping you slammed firm over his face and licking and tongue fucking you into a high, dizzy oblivion, his nose rubbing right over your clit and stubble burning your thighs, and whenever you scream his name he just goes faster, his mouth moving to your clit to suck and bite as you grind down on his chin, and you’ve never been this close this fast. Right on the edge as Dean swirling his tongue around your clit before plunging it back into your cunt, keeping you right on the edge of bliss without falling over.

“Dean-“ You gasp, your voice barely a breath. “Dean, please, wanna cum-“

He squeezes your ass again, pulling your clit between his lips and flicking his tongue in almost a frenzy, and that’s it.

You scream as your orgasm hits, your thighs clamping around Dean’s head as you struggle to stay upright, and it’s only when you’re shaking and whimpering above him that Dean slows his ministrations.

Warm hands squeeze your hips and roll you off Dean’s face, holding you carefully until you’re flat on your back, and Dean’s above you with an open, adoring face.

“Good?”

You nod weakly, spreading your legs without thought at his deep voice. 

Dean laughs. “Awesome. Wait, I gotta-“

Two broad fingers run between the lips of your pussy, and you let out a shaky moan as Dean’s words hang gathers your release on his fingers.

“You’re better than I imagined, baby girl.” He mutters. “So wet. Responsive.” Just to prove his point, Dean pinches and rolls your clit, and your back arches off the bed as you whine. “I know, sweetheart, just- here.”

You blink up at him as those two fingers move to rest right to your lips, and Dean raises his brows.

“Open for me.” He presses the fingers down on your lower lip, and a grin splits his face as you obey. “Good girl. Just want you to taste how delicious you are, sweetheart, make sure you know.”

Your tongue swirling over your fingers as you suck off your arousal, and that alone is enough to make you ready for him all over again, but the way Dean watches you drags you right up to the edge.

Like you’re holy. And perfect. And there’s really never been another place for him but right here, at your side.

Dean pulls out his fingers with a pop, his voice hoarse as he holds your gaze. “More?”

You nod without a thought. “More.”

Dean give you a small, almost nervous grin, and moves himself until he’s hovering over you, only a breath away, and his cock is sliding between your pussy lips, hitching right at your entrance.

“You-“

“Yes.” Your answer is quick and breathy, and Dean grins down at you without any form of restraint on his face.

“I love you, you know.”

“I’ve got it.” You mumble, wrapping your arms around his neck. “And I love you too.”

“Good. Just making sure.”

“Dean-“

He angles his lips over yours for a long, slow kiss. Deep and heavy and almost gentle, going until you’re moaning below him.

Then he slams his cock into you, and you're gone.

This is where Dean belongs. He bottoms out in one stroke, and you barely need time to adjust before you’re clawing at his back in a silent plea to fucking move, and when he does it’s perfect. He’s hitting so deep inside of you, and filling you up better than anything else ever could, and every moan and breathless plea of his name only makes Dean go faster. Harder. Until he’s properly fucking you, the bed creaking as he splits you open and mutters low filth in your ear, but you’re high to really hear it.

And everything that breaks through just manages to light you on fire more.

“Taking me so good.” He grunts in your ear, and you roll your hips up, trying to match his every thrust. “God, you feel like fuckin’ paradise, baby girl. All tight and wet, I never- Shit-“

Dean cuts himself off with a wet, open-mouthed kiss, and you start to writhe below him. 

“Dean- I’m close again-“

“I know.” He mutters, pressing a slightly softer kiss to the corner of your mouth. “Want you to come with me, sweetheart. Can you-“

You squeeze around him, and Dean groans right down your throat.

“Son of a- Alright-“ His thumb snakes between your bodies, rubbing quick, furious circles around your clit. “Let’s go, baby, c’mon-“

“Dean, please.”

He moans as you start to squirm, his movements growing desperate and uneven. “I know, I’ve got you, you’re being so good-“

You start to arch off the bed again, and Dean holds you firm against him, all as his fingers keep moving.

“Good girl, so fucking tight, just need you to come for me-“

It’s someone bigger than the last one. Longer and crashing over you in a beautiful, starlit wave that drowns out everything but the sight of Dean’s face as he cums, the sound of him groaning your name, and the feeling of him between your legs. Heavy and big, his release spilling into your pussy as he gives a few last, lazy strokes.

Dean rolls off you with a gentle kiss to your brow, and the bed is too big and cold until he returns.

A warm cloth is pressed along your inner thighs as he cleans you up, and a gentle kiss lands on your abdomen right before he leaves once more.

There’s a thud as he discards the cloth, and then he’s back. Scooting in bed beside you and pulling you right up to his chest, holding you so carefully it would be impossible to know that, only minutes ago, he’d been fucking you so hard you can still feel him.

“Sam’s never gonna let us live this down.” Dean mutters, and you let out a soft laugh.

“No. I think we deserve that, though. If we’ve been even half as bad as he said.”

Dean scoffs. “I’m a saint, sweetheart, I’ve never done anything wrong in my life-“

“Sam told me about how you have a porn magazine of women who look like me.”

“I- Yeah.” He sighs, and you smile into his chest. “But he told me that you’ve stealing all my shirts to wear them while you fuck yourself with a dildo.”

“Jesus.” You flush, but still squeeze your arms around Dean’s body a little tighter. “We really are that bad, huh.”

“Yeah, but if it helps, I think that dildo thing is hot-“

“Of course your do.”

Dean laughs, his thumb tracing circles on your arm. “How should we get him back for this?”

“I think,” You hum, propping your chin up on his chest. “That you should let this one go.”

“But-“

“Dean Winchester.” You snap, narrowing your eyes and pushing up on your palms. “Don’t lie to me and say that you were planning on doing this yourself. Sam got you laid, and a girlfriend who loves you.”

Dean raises his brows. “Girlfriend?”

You swallow, but don’t waver. You’ve come this far. “Yes.”

He grins, grabbing one of your hands to press a kiss to your knuckles. “Awesome. About Sam-“

“No.”

“I’m thinking we drink all his stupid smoothies-“

“Dean.” You lower yourself down, until your nose to nose with Dean’s pretty, stupid grin. “Go buy your brother a big salad and stupid smoothie as a thank you, then get your ass back in bed.”

Dean closes the final distance with a long, easy kiss, not bothering to pull away when he speaks.

“Yes ma’am.”

End Note: Rare day where it's beautiful to be Sam Winchester. And those two perverts are meant for each other. Good for them.

If you like this story, please reblog, share, or leave a comment! <3

Taglist (Fill out this form to be added!)

@artemys-ackles @ambiguous-avery @nightxcreature @sthefferrete @lyarr24

@deansbbyx @bakugotypecrashout @foolinthera1n @globetrotter28 @lordofthunderthr

@youdontknowe @nyrtopia @iloveeveryoneyoureamazing @panicking-outside-the-disco @elle14-blog1

@impala67rollingthroughtown @dumb--blonde @itsdearapril @apobangpo-0613 @alwaystiredandconfused

@arcticwisteria @generalmoonpolice @foxyjwls007 @jackles010378 @godhelpthisbtch

@ilovedeanwinchester4 @sleepykittycx @immastealurkneecaps @star-yawnznn @maddie0101

@chi-raz @lori19 @wynnthewynnderful @redwinexsupernova @tiana-kh

@woaheasytig3r @canibeyourghoulfriend @lovelywebber @salemslostwitch @winchester-whiskey

@and-i-wish @jsudsgf @fullbelieverheart @wowzabowza69 @bonbonnie88

@pillowjj @barnes70stark @kamisobsessed @happyfxckinghorrors @deans-yn

@jofinka

[wendichester]

please can i request where both Sam and Dean and DOWN BAD for reader and they’re kinda competing whilst reader is just sweet and oblivious :3

-💌

⋆ 𐙚 ̊. sweet, oblivious, you,

summary. dean likes you. sam likes you, too. lucky you, oblivious to it all.

pairing. dean winchester x reader x sam winchester genre. fluff? giggling

wordcount. 902

notes / warnings. the fact that i will NEVER get tired of writing this scenario. ever. keep 'em coming! 😙

It starts — like all dumb things do — with a stupid dare.

“Bet I can make her laugh first,” Dean smirks across the map table, arms folded like a smug bastard.

Sam snorts. “You wish. She actually appreciates wit, not whatever half-baked dad jokes you throw around.”

You’re by the bookshelf, humming under your breath, completely oblivious to the low-key testosterone death match firing up behind you. You reach up for a dusty tome, tiptoeing just slightly. The hem of your shirt rides up.

Dean notices. Sam notices. They both die a little inside.

Dean’s already moving before his brain catches up, slipping in beside you with a cocky grin.

“Need a hand, sweetheart?” he drawls, voice low and way-too-charming.

You glance over, flashing him a sunny, unsuspecting smile that could probably solve international crises. “Oh, thanks, Dean! But I got it.” You stretch a little higher. The book wobbles dangerously.

Sam’s at your side in an instant, shooting Dean a look that screams "back off."

“Careful,” Sam says, steadying your elbow with a gentle hand. “You’ll hurt yourself.”

Dean rolls his eyes so hard you hear it. “She’s reaching for a book, Sammy. Not defusing a bomb.”

“Still.” Sam’s thumb brushes your arm, lingering way longer than necessary. “Better safe than sorry.”

You, adorable and oblivious, just beam at them both like they’re not about two seconds from actual combat over who gets to breathe your air first.

The second battlefront: dinner.

You curl up in one of the bunker’s oversized chairs, thumbing through an old lore book, mind a million miles away.

Dean’s in the kitchen, sleeves pushed up, working the stove like he's auditioning for a cooking show. Sam’s at the counter, chopping vegetables with the focused intensity of a man preparing for war.

You poke your head in. “Whatcha making?”

Dean immediately perks up. “Your favorite,” he says, without hesitation. (He’s guessing. He has no idea. But it’s worth the gamble.)

Sam frowns. “I thought you liked pasta?” He’s already halfway into preparing a damn Michelin-starred spaghetti situation.

You laugh — that bright, easy sound that turns both their spines into melted goo — and shrug. “Honestly? I’ll eat anything. Thanks, guys!”

And just like that, they’re both locked in a culinary death race, throwing ingredients around like Iron Chef rejects, both pretending not to be watching your every move.

Dean wins, barely, sliding a plate in front of you with a wink that says worship me, woman.

Sam, not to be outdone, offers fresh-grated parmesan with a flourish. You clap your hands, delighted by the drama you don’t even realize you’ve caused.

They both look like they’ve been knighted when you say it’s the best dinner you’ve had all month.

The third (and most painful) arena: movie night.

You stretch out on the couch, blanket pooled around your legs, utterly relaxed.

Dean flops down beside you, casual as hell, his thigh brushing yours. No accident.

Sam pointedly drops onto your other side, “accidentally” letting his arm settle along the back of the couch — behind you. Also no accident.

The TV flickers. Some old action movie Dean picked blares into the room, all explosions and bad one-liners. You cuddle deeper into the couch, utterly content, totally unaware you’ve become the center of a full-blown territorial pissing contest.

Dean shifts closer. His knee bumps yours again. This time he doesn’t move it.

Sam leans in, murmuring some quiet comment about the plot that makes you laugh. His hand, warm and steady, brushes the back of your shoulder.

Dean glares at Sam. Sam glares at Dean.

You just sip your drink, clueless, precious, without a single idea that these two men are on the verge of an emotional knife fight over who gets to make you giggle next.

The final straw?

You yawn.

Not just any yawn — a sleepy, trusting, head-tilted yawn that makes you look small and soft and like every secret dream they’ve ever been too scared to say out loud.

You lean, just slightly, onto Sam’s side.

Dean’s arm snaps out, catching your waist instinctively, pulling you half against him instead.

You blink up at them both, confused and sleepy and unfairly cute.

“What’s wrong?” you mumble.

Everything, Dean thinks, stomach flipping.

Nothing, Sam thinks, already plotting Dean’s downfall.

Dean covers faster. “Nothing, sweetheart. You’re just…” His voice dips, rough and warm. “You’re real cute when you’re tired, y’know that?”

Sam’s hand flexes where it’s still behind you, fighting every urge to just tuck you under his chin and never let you go.

You laugh softly, like they haven’t just shredded themselves into tiny pathetic ribbons over you. “You guys are weird tonight,” you tease.

Dean grins, cocky and lazy, masking the manic panic under his ribs. “We’re always weird, darlin’.”

Sam hums, low and agreeable, his palm brushing your shoulder again — a steady, grounding touch.

You yawn again, curling up tighter between them like you belong there. Neither of them breathes for a full minute.

Later, when you’re asleep, curled up with your head on a shared pillow between them, Dean catches Sam’s eye over your hair.

Silent. Battling.

Sam shrugs a little, as if to say, not giving up.

Dean smirks back, mouth twitching with all the trouble he plans to cause. Bring it on, Sammy.

Because no matter who wins?

You’re the prize.

And hell — you’re worth fighting for.

ꔛ. navigation 𓂃˖ ࣪ all drabbles ; compatibility readings ; support my work .ᐟ

[thejakeformerlyknownasprince]

@dr-reids-fidget-toy#omg I didn’t know that about comic bucky that’s rlly cool

Starting a new post because I have off-topic Thoughts. Comic!Bucky contains fascinating commentary on the Cold War, WWII, and the media representations thereof. MCU!Bucky is (by necessity) pretty watered down. In the Brubaker comics, Bucky isn't brainwashed, at least not in the classic Marvel sense. He's just this guy who believes in the absolute rightness of his country, and has been in combat to support the U.S. since age ~14... and then he gets blown up by a missile, loses his memory, and Department X tells him "his country" is the USSR. So now he's the Winter Soldier. Nothing else about his personality or his politics changes. The Winter Soldier we see in the Brubaker comics is definitely a villain — he kills indiscriminately, kidnaps civilians to get his way, murders Rick Jones out of petty spite. But his personality is basically the same from childhood.

This is Steve remembering Bucky as a kid during WWII:

Brubaker retcons Bucky's role, from "kid sidekick who rushes in first and gets kidnapped, needing Captain America to rescue him," to "kid agent who infiltrates bases first, so that Captain America can follow him." With the memory loss, Bucky goes from slitting throats and setting off bombs for Uncle Sam, to doing it for Mother Russia. He's always been as cold and as willing to kill witnesses as he is as the Winter Soldier. It just never made the news reals.

And that's the other half of his retconned role: being propaganda for other child soldiers (e.g. Toro) who join up in his wake. This is Bucky and Steve watching a Cap and Bucky recruitment newsreel:

As an adult, the real difference isn't that Bucky is Soviet now; it's that he doesn't have Steve holding his leash anymore. To be clear, comic Winter Soldier also isn't free to come and go as he pleases — he's kept in a freezer between missions, he's probably not paid, he's in Department X — but he also has far more agency within the latitude of his orders. He's not dead-eyed and tortured by guilt like we see in the MCU. He goes on side quests to kill other Buckies. He argues constantly with Aleksander Lukin (the comic equivalent of Pierce). He complains about the inconvenience of not just sniping Steve in the head to steal the Tesseract.

Brubaker's point, throughout the comic, is that we have been lied to about World War II being "noble" or "good" or the story of the U.S. saving the day. And that that lie is used to prop up everything from U2 spy planes built with 100x the budget for education, to the Patriot Act nullifying the Fourth Amendment. Because not only is "WWII was a noble war fought without atrocities" nationalistic bullshit, but "Soviets are fundamentally different from us" is too. Bucky's continuity of character reveals both at once. He's a walking Soviet superweapon. Why? Because he was a walking American superweapon first, starting before he was old enough to shave.

Anyway, I get why the MCU had to change his backstory. You have to a) remind the audience who Bucky is, b) show-don't-tell why Steve is sad Bucky is trying to kill him, c) get across the idea that Bucky doesn't want to kill Steve but feels he has to, d) use Bucky to develop Steve's character, and e) set up a way for Bucky to get un-brainwashed. All within the span of ~30 minutes this movie has for this plot, amidst all the other plots. MCU!Bucky plaintively asking Pierce who Steve was, only to get slapped in the face, is sort of like AniTV!Tom constantly pawing at his ear: it quickly gets across that this character isn't acting under his own volition, in a way that minimizes audience confusion.

Plus: it's a Hollywood movie. It wouldn't get funded if it was too critical of the U.S. military. Movies are always, by definition, more conservative than other media because of their need for funding. And the MCU makes a decent effort to incorporate at least some criticism of the U.S., having Zola be involved in Operation Paperclip and having him (while working for the U.S.) order Howard Stark's murder. But a computer ghost reciting dry facts about the CIA recruiting Nazis doesn't have the same gut punch as watching the "good guys" send the literal child to knife his fellow child soldiers during WWII would have had.

[deniigi]

i just wanted to let you know that i absolutely love your writing. i found your account a couple years ago when i was super into daredevil and read every single daredevil fic you’d written because i am so obsessed with your characterisations of literally everyone. your writing style is so amazing to me, makes me feel like i’m chewing on glass. at this point i’ve read nearly all of your fics and reread a lot of them too and every time i check on your account and see you’ve switched to a new fandom i get so excited bc it’s almost always a fandom i’m into as well. your writing is just really beautiful and special to me so i wanted to let you know that :)

Our tin hats are synched!!!!

This is a gift as a reader, but it is also a gift to an author. Thank you so much for coming with me as I wander. I’m really amazed by how many of you all trust me when I get invested in a new kind of media, like, I think we all know that my characterization of said media is always going to be a little screwy, but I am so happy that we are enjoying the experience together.

I’m searching for crunchy new things right now, tbh.

I’m not done with Star Wars, but I still need a break from it and to finally make myself watch Rogue One. I think I’m just sort of put off by the circular arguments going around in those circles right now.

I really loved Kenobi. I really liked how we got a representation of him that was compelling and fuckin DUSTY. God, I love the amount of dust in Star Wars. But the other shows just aren’t really drawing me in; their vibe feels very…high stakes and not high stakes in the dusty depressed man in the desert kind of way.

I still can’t quite get myself to write Marvel (that anon who asked if I would ever write Team Red again is a worm in my ear, I swear to god. I WILL TRY. I just need to figure out how). I am trying. I saw a trailer for the new Fantastic Four movie and nearly died. Like. I’m sorry, they choose DIN??? DIN-DIN, Pedro-Din? Din Djarin? To be REED???? ‘

Of all people. Of all people.

You know what I would accept it if they literally just replaced Reed with Din, helmet and all, and said Reed got changed in space.

I could work with that. We could have Johnny trying to have an emotional conversation with a space warrior wearing a helmet and jetpack.

But instead we have.

Anyways.

Marvel continues to amaze me.

The Merlin folks are wonderful, too, though I feel like I’m looking for a characterization of those lads that I can’t quite find.

I don’t know if my particular type of humor is suited for this fandom. I keep wanting to imagine a Marvel/Merlin crossover wherein Sam Wilson meets Merlin in a pub and thinks all is fine and lovely until all hell breaks loose in Cardiff, and he thinks he has to Captain America his way through it, only to be shoved aside by the Welsh public who are just like ‘fuck off, we already have one of you.’

I just think it would be cute if Sam Wilson was the biggest King Arthur nerd out there and he meets him and 1) he’s short because he’s a 6th century king with the immunity of a modern 4year old and 2) he speaks terrible English with the craziest accent anyone has ever heard because his first language is Brythonic, his second language is Latin, and his third/fourth languages are Old Norse/English depending on who he was warring with that month and 3) he and Merlin are so codependent they have to text each other to see what color the other one’s drink is so that they can get one of their own to match even though they are across the whole city.

OFMD is a cesspit. I’m sorry, but there’s next to no engagement there and also people are racefaking in the fandom?? Fuckin’ wild, I can only observe them from a comfortable corner. I would love to write more about Izzy being a bug-eyed chihuahua but I’ve sort of lost motivation to carry on in that sandbox.

I will say that @petrichordiam has gotten me reading the Apothecary Diaries as of yesterday and is stuffing letters in my mailbox about little miss poison, so we can see what will come of that.

I’m taking recommendations, though.

Happy to hear what other folks are into right now.

Is it good??? Is it crunchy?? Do you have fandom drama for me? What are the vibes like? Give me a sense of what’s going on over there.

[bcacstuff]

🚨 [This story contains major spoilers from the season seven finale of Outlander, “A Hundred Thousand Angels.”] 🚨

In seven seasons of Outlander, Claire (Caitríona Balfe) and Jamie Fraser (Sam Heughan) have endured enough trauma to last multiple lifetimes. While they have always found their way back to each other and the family they’ve created together across centuries, Claire and Jamie, now in middle age, are perhaps more aware than ever about what they stand to lose.

“Jamie is very much aware of his mortality. He’s talked about it multiple seasons, about his nine lives, and he’s right at the end of them,” Heughan tells The Hollywood Reporter in a joint interview with Balfe about the season seven ending. “He didn’t want to be involved in this [Revolutionary War], but his choice now is that he has to be involved to protect those he loves. I think [Jamie and Claire] are aware that they can’t exist without each other and they’d rather not. So what does that mean for the future? I think if one loses the other, then I don’t know if there’s much hope for them.”

Despite that bleak outlook, Claire and Jamie have reason to be hopeful heading into the eighth and final season of the fantasy historical drama. In the season seven finale, as Claire recovers from being shot again and undergoing a life-saving surgery at the hands of Denzell (Joey Phillips), she and Jamie discover that their first daughter Faith, who they believed died in childbirth, had actually survived and was the mother of their new ward Fanny Pocock (Florie Wilkinson) and her late sister Jane (Silvia Presente), who Jamie and his biological son William (Charles Vandervaart) were tragically unable to save from captivity just days earlier.

That shocking cliffhanger — which was not in Diana Gabaldon’s Outlander novels — sets up the final 10 episodes, which Balfe and Heughan have already finished filming. Given that the show has remained a constant in their lives for 11 years, the actors, who both became producers during the fifth season, admit they are still in the early stages of grieving that loss and figuring out how to fill that new void.

“I’m reading a lot, I’m writing a bit, I’m watching so many movies at the moment — all of these things that I just didn’t have time to do,” Balfe says. “I feel like as an actor, when you’re working, you’re on output mode all the time, and it’s so important to feed your soul as well. I want to take my time, wait and do things that really mean something to me.”

Below, the actors behind one of the most beloved TV couples of all time open up to THR about the evolution of their onscreen and offscreen relationships, how they chose to play the key moments from the latest chapter of Claire and Jamie’s love story — and the one genre they would love to collaborate on in the future.

***

Having played Claire and Jamie for over a decade, what new layers were you able to find in the playing of these characters in the seventh season?

SAM HEUGHAN Jamie’s gone from being this tempestuous, impetuous highland warrior with very little responsibility to becoming a laird, and now he’s responsible for not just his men in battle, but everyone on Fraser’s Ridge. He’s essentially a landlord or a clansman. But what I think is really interesting as well is that over the past couple of seasons — but this one in particular — Jamie realizes what he’s got to lose. I think now he realizes he can’t have a life without Claire; he knows that life isn’t worth living without her. I guess being more fragile is what’s interesting about him, which I think comes with old age as well. He’s not as hotheaded, he’s definitely more experienced, and with age comes perhaps more insight into mortality.

CAITRÍONA BALFE Seasons five and six were such a huge shift in who Claire was. Going through the attack and then the ether storyline, it wasn’t like [she became] two different people, but Claire’s whole structure and her coping mechanisms had to change. In season seven, it was this tentative rebuilding of who she was, which was really interesting because I feel like up until that point, there was a lot of compartmentalization — she would do things, but it was put away in a box and she wouldn’t really deal with it. In season seven, there was a maturity to her, but it came with this new layer of vulnerability, especially the beginning of the second part. I think it just made everything much more porous and much more fragile.

As you’ve played these characters from their earlier adult years into middle age, how have you found ways to deepen the palpable sense of intimacy and chemistry between them?

BALFE One of the things that Sam and I were very interested in working out and exploring was this difference in intimacy. People talk about the passion of Claire and Jamie, and that is always a through line, but it can’t feel like those first throes of lust. You want to find something that has more depth, more maturity and more nuance. So we didn’t want to be chasing something that we had done in season one; we didn’t want to be always trying to replicate that. We wanted to find new ways of doing it — and we did.

We had those conversations for most of the sex scenes, and we had chats with the writers about how to find those intimate moments when they’re in conversation and when we see them working out issues in their marriage. It was really important to us to develop that as the seasons went on because sometimes, there’s a call from the fans, and they want to see those sex scenes, and they want the passion. And we want to give you that, but we want to give it to you in a more honest way.

HEUGHAN I think you’re absolutely right. Over the years, they’ve both had to accept each other and their failings, and all these things that have happened either together or separately. And it can’t be like season one because XYZ has happened, so therefore, who’s this character? Who’s this person in front of you now? If anything, they’ve become more understanding of each other, and I think that comes with just playing these characters over time when they’ve been assaulted and lost and found each other again.

BALFE There was a vulnerability to them in the beginning because everything was so new and they didn’t know if they could trust each other. As we were in the mid-seasons, it felt like they had really come into their own — and there was a strength. In the later seasons, there was this new and very different vulnerability. With the precariousness of life that they were experiencing, there was this whole new set of fears and vulnerabilities that came up. That wasn’t something that I expected or imagined would happen, but it naturally happened that way.

Lord John Grey (David Berry), left. Starz

Caitríona, grief is already a tricky emotion to play, but you had the added challenge of having to make the audience believe, even if for a little bit, that Claire had really lost Jamie in episode 10. How did you want to play the different stages of her grief?

BALFE It was really tough, because I feel like there is that sense of, “Does anyone really believe that Jamie Fraser is dead?” But you have to go for it. I had just lost my dad, so the last thing I wanted to do was go into work and feel these feelings. It was not my favorite couple of weeks at work. I worked really hard with the writers to craft a bit of a journey, and there was that [line] that I held on to as well: “I would know [if he died]. I would feel it.” She feels betrayed by herself because she feels like it should feel differently. So there’s the anger and the disbelief that comes with what it feels like when you can’t even trust your own emotions.

And then, of course, the added implication of Lord John Grey [David Berry] was a curveball. (Laughs) David Berry was an amazing scene partner in those scenes. To do intimate scenes with somebody other than Sam — usually all my stuff is with him, so it was like an added unknown territory. But what was also good was we approached it in a very different way to how Sam and I approached things. Sam and I have this shorthand — it’s very organic, and we don’t have to plan out things as much — whereas David likes to [plan]. I’m glad he did because I was quite lost about how we were going to achieve it, but I think in the end it worked quite well.

Claire’s grief-stricken hook-up with John — during which they were both picturing Jamie — has to be one of the most shocking moments of the series. How did you justify Claire’s actions in that moment for yourself?

BALFE I suffer from a real need for things to be logical, which drives the writers crazy, because for me to be able to play it, I need to be able to understand the journey. I think in the final edit, things are quite cut up and it’s not as linear as how we played it. But I think it was great that David and I found a linear journey into it so we could understand that [moment], because it’s also two people who are drunk.

When you’re drunk, there isn’t always logic, but there has to be those moments of, how do you get from A to B? How do these two people who aren’t sexually attracted to each other, who don’t have a history together, go from being alone, drunk and in pain to then being together? So it was finding that shared pain, that shared anger. Lord John was almost needing this kind of consolation in the beginning, and then it’s just the anger and the passion — and it had to come out in some way. So that’s how it happened.

But I think that morning after scene — that gorgeous story that Lord John had and the insight into his life — is so much more intimate than the stuff before. The intimacy the next morning is where you really see these two people form this bond that isn’t sexual, but it’s a friendship and a deep understanding of each other, which I thought was quite beautiful.

In episode 12, Jamie makes his feelings about Claire and John’s entanglement clear in a long, heated sequence where Jamie and Claire are working through their own emotions in real time. How did you each approach that fight?

BALFE Well, Sam had COVID. Do you remember? (Laughs)

HEUGHAN Yeah! It was certainly very challenging. In some ways, it was [shot] like a play, but I think we shot one direction, then I came down with COVID. I think quite some time later we shot the rest of it, and we shot it in two sections because it moves all around the house. I suppose [that sequence shows] why this couple are still together. They manage to work through it, to hear each other and to communicate despite Jamie’s stubbornness, anger and jealousy.

BALFE But neither are wrong, really. This was a situation that is so unusual and unique, so it’s totally understandable why Jamie would be so upset and angry, but it’s also totally understandable why Claire would defend herself. I think what’s great is you get this tension of these two people who ultimately love each other so much, but they’re going to stand their ground. I think both Sam and I relish when we do get to do scenes like this. There’s certain days when you’re on a show and you’re just sitting at a table and somebody’s passing somebody coffee, and it doesn’t necessarily feel like the most rewarding acting day. But when you get big scenes like this, you really feel like you have to work hard, give it your all, and make it work.

Sam, do you think Jamie could ever bring himself to forgive John?

HEUGHAN I think what Jamie did [to John upon learning what happened] — is it justifiable? No, from [the viewers’] point of view. But for Jamie, probably. But what he did to him is horrific and certainly has broken their bond. John Grey comes back and does justify it, and I think we hope that they will become friends again, but I think it’d be a lot for them to get over. Jamie is going to have to admit his wrongdoing, and I think that’s probably the hardest thing for Jamie to do. It’s certainly put a rift in that relationship, and I’m sure for Claire and John Grey as well, it’s also a pretty weird situation. (Laughs)

In episode 15, Claire gets shot in the battlefield and Jamie desperately searches for any kind of way to save her. Sam, how did you want to play Jamie’s inner turmoil?

HEUGHAN Jamie has always been in control in situations, and I thought it was really interesting in the script that he loses it and he’s lashing out. I think the only other time where we’ve seen him like that is when he lost Murtaugh at the Battle of Alamance. I think that moment was close because Murtaugh was his godfather, a father figure to him, but this is even bigger. It’s like, “How do you react in that moment when your universe has just imploded?” I didn’t want to plan it; I just wanted to go for it and see what happens. I think what’s cool about the writing and the space I got in the performance was that he’s not Jamie. He’s out of control, and he’s pleading with everyone, with God. He knows he’s on the edge of losing his entire universe.

How did you react, then, to Jamie’s decision to write his notice of resignation using Claire’s blood on the back of one of his soldiers?

HEUGHAN Look, it’s a really hard one to get your head around. It’s a book moment, and even in discussing the practicality of that [moment], we were talking about “What is the way to write on this guy’s back?” and we realized it’s actually very difficult. But I think it’s just sheer desperation; it’s a moment where he’s completely at a loss. I think he can’t work out how to get his message through to these people, and he just goes for the nearest thing. It’s a really dark idea. It’s amazing that after eight seasons — well, seven at this point — that these characters still surprised us as actors, and there’s so many times we’ve had these book moments where I’m like, “Jamie wouldn’t do that. Jamie knows better.” And then, I’m like, “OK, let’s see what happens.” And actually, you get this really dramatic moment which is shocking, and I think that’s what makes Outlander perhaps still resonate.

Caitríona, on the flip side, what was it like for you to play the aftermath of Claire getting shot?

BALFE It was very funny because they were very concerned about how comfortable I would be lying down for that long, and I was like, “Guys, I’m going to be lying down. It’s going to be very comfortable!” But they made a prosthetic for my stomach so they could do the operation. Look, I’ve never been shot. You can watch things, but sometimes we joke about it, like, “Am I just playing my version of what I’ve seen other actors do in movies?” (Laughs.) But you have to trust the director and everything that’s going on in the scene and go with it. I’m not going to lie: I don’t mind playing sick and half-dying. (Laughs.) You get to let other people do all the hard work, and you just get to lie there and moan a bit. But the set was amazing. When you have all of those things around — and Sam was incredible in those scenes — it makes your job very easy.

After they’re unable to save Jane in the finale, William has a heated confrontation with Jamie about William’s late birth mother, and William ends the conversation with the line, “I will never call you father.” The hurt on Jamie’s face is obvious, but what is going through Jamie’s mind in that scene?

HEUGHAN Jamie’s never been able to be a father to William, and I think he’s always wanted to be — from a distance. Here’s a moment where Jamie doesn’t really know how to be a father. He’s been a father to other people. He’s got so many surrogate sons — from Fergus to a bunch of people that he’s brought into this extended family that he’s got — but with William, it’s a really tough one. I think it’s great because you can see Jamie and his son are very similar; they both have that fire in them. And without giving away spoilers, it’s definitely something that plays out a lot [going forward].

But it’s also interesting because he is John Grey’s son in a lot of ways. He’s been brought up by John Grey, and that adds another dimension to that trio’s relationship. Jamie has all this pride, hurt and longing that he could be [Jamie’s] father, and also jealousy that John has been his father but also thankful [at the same time]. Certainly, it’s going to be a tough one for [Jamie and William] to both overcome their pride.

Jamie Fraser (Sam Heughan) and his biological son William (Charles Vandervaart). Starz

In the final scene, Claire overhears Fanny singing “I Do Like to Be Beside the Seaside,” a 19th-century song Claire sang to her and Jamie’s first daughter, Faith. After learning that Fanny and Jane’s mother was also named Faith, Claire now believes that Faith wasn’t actually stillborn and had somehow lived to have children of her own. How does that set up their journey in the final season?

HEUGHAN It’s a huge moment for them to find out that their daughter potentially lived, and now they have this grandchild in their life. It’s a great cliffhanger — one that I think book and non-book fans are going to be surprised by. I think it was beautifully done with the song. It’s interesting because even playing [Faith’s death] way back in season two, we played the truth of it; we had no idea ourselves. So it was a shock for us as actors reading it and learning about it, as it was for the characters. I think the thought process for Jamie is, “How is it possible?” The elation, the happiness that, actually, it could be possible. And then, who is this young girl in front of us right now?

BALFE I just love it when you are given a scene and you read it, and it’s like, “Ooh, that’s really good.” But in the playing of it, when the hairs on your arms are standing up, it’s pretty brilliant. Florrie is so amazing. Every time we have a scene with her, you’re just so blown away by how brilliant she is. It’s such an interesting cliffhanger because it just opens up this whole other world of questions, which leads us so brilliantly into the next season. I think for Claire, it’s like her heart stops, her heart breaks and her heart sings — all at the same time.

You’ve seen each other through just about everything in the 11 years that you’ve worked together. Looking back, how has your working relationship evolved over time, and what do you think has stayed the same?

HEUGHAN (Laughs) That’s a cool question!

BALFE Well, I think our childish sense of humor has stayed the same.

HEUGHAN I was going to say our humor, silliness. When we’re in the shit and it’s a tough day, or we’re in the dark and it’s cold, we’ve always had each other. I’m very fortunate to have spent so much time with such an amazing person and also managed to laugh a lot as well. But what’s changed, Cait?

BALFE I think when we first started, the job was our lives. We lived it, breathed it. Our schedules were so insane. We really didn’t do much of anything else. I think as we’ve gotten older, our lives have gotten so much busier and you have obviously a wealth of experience to fall back on with your character. So it’s not that we’re not as invested as much, but the show isn’t just the only thing going on. I think, in that way, maybe our approach to things is slightly different. Would you agree, Sam, or no?

HEUGHAN Yeah. It’s not sustainable to be all-consumed by something for that long, but in some ways, perhaps having a bit more space or a life outside of it, it also influences the work itself. We’ve just both grown over time, and I guess it’s depressing but also an amazing opportunity that we’ve got to live with these characters for so long.

What would it take, then, for the two of you to work together again? Maybe in a more modern story without wigs or period costumes?

BALFE I’d love to do a comedy with Sam.

HEUGHAN Yeah, that would be a lot of fun. And as you said, yeah, no wig. Well, actually —

BALFE The wigs would be alright. No corset for me.

HEUGHAN I’d wear a corset, so maybe there’s the comedy right there.

BALFE I’ll wear your wig. There you go!

***

All seven seasons of Outlander are now streaming on Starz.

[imomnba-x07]

hey, im a different anon and idk if that person already replied to u.

anyway.

i see the point that one person was trying to make but i agree with you that even tho ava and yelena were victims they still continued killing ppl and work for women like val after they were free to do what they want. they did show in the movie that they started regretting it and wanting to do better (at least yelena when she said she wanted to be like nat) but that's doesn't change the fact that they have blood on their hands that is not linked to the red room but a freelancer job they deliberately decide to do.

i also agree that all the team is self-centred, even tho john and alexei show it way more than the other and are the only ones that have no other reason than fame and glory.

i agree with your whole point but at the same time i still feel like bucky was a lot out of character in the post credit.

in the whole movie i felt like he was the only one who was just there and didnt actually fits in the group dynamics because he was barely with them. then, he asks them to go against val FOR ONE MISSION and suddenly he is part of the group and even accepting the new avengers title?

it felt weird, like the whole scene was a different movie.

it doesn't make sense for him to act like this. i wasn't exactly looking forward to this movie since it was announced (for this phase i only had hype for cabnw cause its sam's story and the marvels) but i went to watch it anyway and while it was an okay movie (until the last scene) i had the constantly feeling that they could have made the movie without bucky and that he was just there cause they probably needed an old character the general audience knew already.

he might have been a pain the ass in the past, but he has always sided with ppl like steve in civil war, sam in tfatws, wakandans during the wakanda war in the avengers movie ecc. it makes no sense for his character to betray them. to betray sam of all the ppl after he was the one that supported him as captain america since endgame.

this is just a personal opinion tho, as someone who has been a sam and bucky fans since 2014 (in every media). i can understand if u think otherwise, im very open about hearing other ppl opinions and change mine if i said something wrong.

hope this ask doesn't sound aggressive or bad in general, i apologise in advance if this sounds like an attack

Good evening anon!

No need to be nervous, I agree with you. Bucky was completely OOC in the entire film (from what I’ve heard) and in the post credit scene.

I mean he starts off the movie trying to take Val down and by the end he just…..doesn’t do that? It’s like dementia finally hit his old ass and he forgot what he was even doing there in the first place.

He had a personal reason for wanting Val impeached taht made sense for his character but they never went anywhere with it and just shoe horned him in an awful way with this band of strangers that he doesn’t belong with.

The Bucky I know would never have turned on Sam like that, or betrayed the Wakandans AGAIN after being given a second chance by them. Idk who the man is I’m looking at but it’s not Bucky.

Which is also why I agree with you (and I’ve said it a few times myself) that Bucky was solely in this movie to garner attention. He’s a fan favorite and his crazy stans jump at any opportunity to see him on screen so they were likely banking on his popularity to sell the thing (not that that worked out well for them😬)

It does such a disservice to the character because he doesn’t FIT with anything that happened in this movie. If there is not a coherent story that can be told with a character, if that character does not go through an arc that makes sense, then that character should not be there. Especially when they don’t contribute to the plot in a natural way.

And it’s also why I can’t stand the narrative that people are running with that they’re all a “found family”. Bucky already had a family he wasn’t just wallowing around and lonely, this is a grown man with several connections that he threw away for reasons that make zero sense. Plus he doesn’t spend any time with them at all to grow any sort of personal connection with any of these thunderbolts. And that can be said for all of them. They are STRANGERS. They don’t know eachother, they are not close.

All this to say, I don’t want the fact that he was written terribly to be used as an excuse for what he did in this movie. His actions were hurtful and have in universe consequences now which I’ll constantly bring up when I have to defend Sam Wilson from freak ass thunderbolt fans. Though I try to forget this movie ever happened for the sake of my sambucky heart.

I hate everything this movie did to his character. How any of his Stans are ok with what went on in this movie is beyond me.

[winterzxsoldierz]

War Child

Part one

Bucky Barnes x (Fem) Reader

Avengers x (Fem) Reader

Warnings: Blood, mention of deaths, other creepy hydra shit, bad language words (lol) and a lot more other warnings, so be prepared.

Characters: Tony Stark, Steve Rogers, Clint Barton (Sometimes) Natasha Romanoff, Bruce Banner (Sometimes) Thor Odison, Loki Laufeyson, Peter Parker, Sam Wilson, Wanda Maximoff, Pietro Maximoff, Bucky Barnes, Yelena Belova, Arnim Zola,

Description: You're a hydra experiment or had been one since you were young, For years you lived within the cold walls of Siberia and when you finally get free, faces from the past and demons come out to haunt you Reader is an enchanted superhuman, she has the super soldier serum giving her, super speed, super strength, a healing factor, fast metabolism, endurance, strong lung capacity & etc, she also has both fire and ice magic. The time line in this will review the past and present. Reader can look anyway you want. Her soon love interest will be Bucky. Authors Note: Please know that none of these characters belong to me, they belong to marvel, Y/N is your character of choice. also your thoughts will be orange, Bucky's thoughts will be blue and the others will be purple

Avengers tower present 9:34 am Avengers pov

Gathered around table enjoying breakfast and conversation sits the avengers, everyone seems happy, Bucky and Loki bantering with one another about who can do bad better, Steve acting like a mom and Tony being the overgrown brat, Wanda, Natasha and Yelena talking quietly amongst each other in sokovian, then there's Peter, Pietro, Sam and Thor arguing about how many bad guys they can beat in a fight, like family they're fun and chaotic. Everything seemed to go quiet when the leather jacket wearing, eye patched man walks in with a file and flash drive, the atmosphere once relaxed and playful now tense and serious, as all eyes land on the director Nick Fury. "Hope i'm not souring the mood." he says his tone, dripping with his usual uncaring sarcasm. "Anyways." he continues, "We have a problem, a big one, a loose cannon hydra related one." He sets down the file on the middle of the table and Bucky is the first to grab it, the minute he opens it, the color from his face drains, there it was a whole section dedicated to you, a ghost is what you are, one he was made to train when he was The winter soldier, a deadly weapon is what you became, just like him, but unlike him, he was captured, but you, you were born and raised into a hell, and turned into something so deadly.

Steve looks at Bucky and raises a brow in concern and curiosity, Steve pauses debating whether he should say anything but he decides to anyway, "Hey Buck, you alright, you look a little pale." Bucky snaps out of his current thoughts and glances at Steve and the rest of the team and he swallows, a shaky sigh leaving his lips and he says "I know her, i knew her." Every member of the team gives each other looks before nodding and taking turns to look at the entire file and Sam speaks "So where do we start?"

Italy present

Your Pov I arrive back into my rented apartment, after getting some needed food and water, i knew my time here in Italy was running thin but there was something about this place i liked, i couldn't get comfortable though, it was only a matter of time before the devil came knocking. After heating up a simple tv dinner, i sit on the small couch in my living room watching the old school box television, it's on the news channel, the headlines read "Avengers strike once again saving over a hundred innocent civilians from a hostage situation with the terrorist group known as HYDRA." A sigh leaves me and i start eating as i change the channel to a cartoon, it wasn't one i've seen before, it was a blonde with really long hair and a pretty purple dress, now interested i continue to watch the movie and finish my dinner, soon i set my plate aside and just watch tv, i was enjoying the movie more than i'd like to admit. Berlin 1953 (Past & your nightmare) "Papa, i don't understand what you want me to do, you little voice trembles as you look up at the man in front of you, he stare you down and pats you head, his German accent thick as he speaks, "In time, you will learn to master the gift i have given you my child." a grin spreads on Zola's lips, to you it seemed innocent but only if you knew it was anything but innocent.

Your Pov (Present) I jolted awake in a slight sweat, my eyes dart around the room, weariness and confusion etched on my features, i thought i was back hom-there, but i'm in my living room, i'm in Italy, i swallow and wipe my forehead with the sleeve of my sweater and i stand up, my steps are silent on the wood floors as i walk into the kitchen, i fill me a glass of water and gulp it down as if i was a man stuck in the desert. my hands are shaky as i set the glass down and stare at the dark curtained covered windows. "He's gone, no longer here." i tell myself and i make my way to my bathroom, a shower was much needed to calm myself.

Berlin 1954 (Past & Bucky's nightmare) "Soldat! you're back with the stuff." Zola hums in approval and takes the metal case from the winter soldier, he snaps his fingers for the soldier to follow him and the soldier complies without question. Zola leads the soldier into the lab, for a moment the soldier tenses, he didn't think he had another procedure today but then his eyes falls onto you, a girl strapped down onto a table asleep, he blinks, he couldn't tell if it was worry, or surprise but he manages to school it like he was taught, the soldiers eyes follow Zola as he pulls out the bag of super serum, it was a cheap one, not to affective but it'll still work, just not like his, the soldier watches as Zola sticks it into an IV like bag and he watches as Zola stick the IV into you and slowly the serum makes it way to your skin and finally it slips into your blood stream making you jolt in pain and cry out.

Avengers tower (Present) Bucky's room Bucky's Pov His eyes snap open quickly and they dart around, checking for any signs of danger or anyone one at all, nothing it's all silent except for his racing heart and his own breathing, his brows are furrowed as he recalls the nightmare, that day, the day when Karpor made him bring that serum to Zola, that day where your life would change for ever and not for the good, a wave of guilt floods through Bucky as he thinks about that day, how he just watched, and stood there as that evil son of a bitch gave you that serum with no remorse as he hurt and changed you drastically. Bucky knew he had to find you, hell he knew you were lost and confused like he was and like he had steve, you'll have him.

Let me know what you think, i will definitely be making different parts to this story, i'm pausing my other story to work on this one since i had this longer and like this better. Part two is being worked on so stay tuned.

Tag list: @sapphirebarnes i know you wanted to be tagged in my other post but i'm keeping that on hold right now, so i hope you like this one just as much.

[hainethehero]

So. Civil War discourse in 2025.

Let’s get down to it.

The movie (to be clear, Cap: Civil War MCU edition, not the comics or the version some of you made up in your own heads) has Tony encountering a woman who blames him for her son’s death due to the avengers time in Sokovia. This was not his fault, or his fault alone, and even though the woman had her right to be upset, it wasn’t fair to put the blame on him directly.

However, instead of going back to the team and telling them what he encountered and then bringing up the whole “we need to be put in check” monologue, Tony goes behind their back to Ross and has him come to avengers tower to inform the team that the accords are happening. Basically the team minus Tony is learning about this as they’re being told and expected to just “comply.”

Very interesting how Tony fans like to spin this in his favor by saying he was right to hold them accountable and Steve is dumb stubborn selfish one when IDK, Tony did all this behind the team’s back and then he has to go against the same accords he helped put together in the end anyway? 😭

Steve is seen reading the accords while Sam is arguing with Rhodey about not thinking this is the right thing to do.

Eventually, most of the team agrees to sign, except Steve and Sam. Clint is Switzerland and retired.

Then the whole Bucky/winter soldier stuff happens and we all know what happens from there.

“Steve tore the avengers apart”

No, Steve and Sam caught up with Bucky and he informed them that he was not the only winter soldier. Steve and Sam decide to go to Siberia. Steve considers telling Tony but Sam tells him that Tony won’t believe him (he’s right). Steve responds by saying, “we’re on our own.” Sam then says, “I know a guy.” Cue Scott Lang’s entrance.

Meanwhile, Tony goes to Queens and pretends he’s personally extending an invite to Peter Parker to join him for a very important internship opportunity. He charms Aunt May for a bit before finding Peter in his room where he proceeds to manipulate/blackmail the kid into coming to Germany with him. He literally threatens to tell Aunt May the truth: https://youtu.be/AVlww2uJHAc?feature=shared (don’t tell Aunt May) to get Peter to agree.

But I mean, that’s not weird or creepy right? That’s totally a normal thing to hold over a 14 year old kid’s head. But maybe that’s just me…

Then they’re at the airport, where Steve tries to explain what he knows to Tony and Rhodey: https://youtu.be/I4FX4GTaxmE?feature=shared

Guess who doesn’t want to hear it? The fighting begins shortly after.

The ending montage, where Tony reads Steve’s letter and apology about not telling him about his parents, and the flip phone he leaves him to call him if he needs help: https://youtu.be/ZFe1iyis3IY?feature=shared

Close out with Steve going to the raft to break out his friends from jail. From then on, he’s a wanted criminal for defying the accords that he never signed and goes on the run until the events of infinity war.

—

Now, the discourse behind this film will go on forever. People will almost always take sides and have their own opinions. But Tony Stark fans seem to have their own version of Civil War in their minds where Tony is absolved of any fault and is the pure victim who never did a wrong thing and the blame for the entire saga is Steve’s fault, according to them.

I encourage them to read what I wrote here and watch those clips from the movie back again. And again.

.

[shadesslut]

a father's malice, pt. 4

Pairing: (Ex-Gf!Ethan Landry x Fem!Reader x Chad Meeks-Martin)

Content Includes: (Angst, blood)

Summary: Ethan goes to the one place he feels accepted

Masterlist

✮

✮

✮

The noises of chattering college kids made Chad’s knee bounce anxiously. Even in his dorm, he could hear the loud conversations his suitemates were having. Harsh white lights made his head hurt, and the plastic chair he sat in at his desk caused his lower back to ache. He didn’t look like it, but he hated being around new people. He never really had a best friend since, well, not since Wes. Only a handful of circle jerk assholes who only tolerated him for his looks. For a year he’d been on edge, so that’s why when a curly-haired brunet entered the room abruptly, he jumped.

He looked nice enough, but still, Chad was cautious. The brunet jumped as he saw Chad. He was easy on the eyes, nice looking. He held a cardboard box and wore a beat-up Jansport backpack. 

“Hi.” He croaked out, his voice straining. Chad nodded at him, and the brunet awkwardly shuffled closer into the room. He looked at Chad’s bed, then his, and set his box down on it, dust slowly puffing up. “Guess this is my side,” 

Chad swiveled back in his chair, taking a deep breath as he stared at the chipped surface of his wooden desk. He closed his eyes for a moment, inhaled, exhaled, and stood up. He put on his chipper smile, eyes not quite matching. He stuck out his hand to the other boy. “I’m Chad, it’s Ethan right?” 

Ethan let out a breathy laugh of relief and nodded. “Y-Yeah, Ethan.” He responded, taking Chad’s hand in a firm shake. Chad’s eyebrows furrowed as he confusedly reacted to the rough, strong hands Ethan had. And for a split second, he had hope of making a new friend. 

—

It was almost nine, and Chad had finally reached the point of relaxation with Ethan that he stopped checking his phone for texts from Mindy. He learned a little about Ethan; he liked old cheesy movies like Star Wars, he loved ketchup, and he had something in common with Chad. 

Home didn’t have a lot of good memories.

Chad had set his laptop on his desk, which now sat towards the middle of the room after two hours of Ethan and Chad rearranging the furniture. Their beds pointed towards each other, and every so often Chad would check to see if Ethan was watching the movie playing. 

“So do you know anyone that goes here?” Ethan asked before stuffing his mouth with a handful of fries. Chad readjusted in his position, putting his arm under his pillow as he laid on it. 

“My sister Mindy, and our friend Y/N.” He answered, purposely not mentioning. Sam and Tara. “She’s on the third floor.” 

Ethan nodded, returning his gaze back to the movie. “I got a sister too.” He mumbled. Chad lifted his head up at him.

“Really?” 

“Yeah, she’s back at home.” 

Chad hummed softly. “Close with her?” 

Ethan smiled to himself, reconciling childhood memories of playing with his sister. “Yeah, she’s older than me. Really like, protective of me y’know?” 

At this point, neither of the boys were watching the movie. Only quietly admiring each other as they asked each other questions. “That’s how I am with my sister.” Chad stated.And maybe that’s how they’d be with each other. Ethan smiled at his comment, but it quickly faded. 

They sat in silence for a moment, their breathing matching the other’s. Ethan huffed as he sat up on his bed, making Chad slightly sit up. “Where you going?” Chad asked. 

Ethan smiled defensively at him, and then he pointed towards the bathroom door. “Gotta take a leak,” Chad snickered at his answer, checking his phone. Ethan laughed as he jumped off his bed, eyes widening at the sound of a metal object clanking onto the floor. Chad immediately sat up, looking at the source of noise. 

A push-button blade sat on the tiles of the floor. Chad tensed, but he just brushed it off as his anxiety pushing his buttons. Ethan, however, looked incredibly nervous. “It was my dad’s,” Ethan coughed out, bending over to retrieve it. “He gave it to me cause y’know, New York! Crime!” 

Chad laughed nervously, but Ethan didn’t give him time to answer, quickly stepping inside the bathroom. Chad didn’t think too much of it, he never expected Ethan to be the type of guy who could practice self-defense, let alone stab anyone. But you know, maybe he didn’t know the guy. 

—

Chad had truly considered Ethan to be his best friend. Even after one of the Ghostfaces stabbed him with the same blade Ethan had dropped that first night in their dorm, he still felt that way. Ethan was his best friend.

It hurt him more when Tara confirmed his suspicions of Ethan in the hospital after. Nine stab wounds to the chest, internal bleeding in his organs, and the one thing that hurt the most was finding out who Ethan really was. He let Y/N spend the night in his room that night, and even though he knew she probably knew about his feelings for Ethan, he felt safe with her.

She told him she was pregnant, and then she asked him if they'd stay friends. Chad didn't have to think to answer.

It was weird; falling in love with Y/N while still having feelings for Ethan. It was weirder helping her raise her and Ethan's son, but at the end of the day it helped him sleep at night. On Chad's worst nights, when he watched those old cheesy movies Ethan liked, when he wore one of Ethan's shirts, thinking of Y/N and Ollie helped him fall asleep.

After awhile, he'd had enough. He turned his love for Ethan into hate, and maybe that wasn't the healthiest option, but it was the one that felt the most good.

When he burned Ethan's shirt he wore to bed, he told himself never again. Never again would he open up to Ethan.

—

It was late, Ethan was tired and irritated, sitting on the dusty wooden floors of the bookstore. Mary held a mug of coffee in her hands, matching pajamas hugging her skin. Ethan’s hands ran through his messed up curls. 

“I’m sorry, again, I know this has been weird.” Ethan apologized for the umpteenth time. Mary straightened her posture and adjusted her glasses. He’d been there for two days, ignoring the buzzing of the incoming calls from Y/N and Chad. 

“I just didn’t know where else to go.” 

“Did she kick you out?” Mary asked softly, trying her best to hide her smile. “I didn’t get the chance to ask you, since you know,”

Ethan stared blankly at his shoes. 

“You’ve been crying on my couch for the past few days.”

Ethan sniffed as he threw his head back, resting it on the bookshelf behind him. His eyes were teary, and he choked out a sob as he shook his head. “I’m too dangerous to be near her, near my kid.” 

Mary listened quietly.

“I’m scared I’m never gonna change. I’ll always be this, this monster. I hate that I have so much malice in me; everyone I see that has the slightest chance of hurting them, I just wanna hurt them.” Mary leaned forward, elbows resting on her knees as she listened carefully. 

“I think up ways,” He started, voice shaky. “Ways to get rid of people, and ways to hurt them.” 

“What’s wrong with being a monster?” Mary asked, interrupting him. Ethan jerked his head towards her, looking for an ounce of unseriousness; it was not there. There was a lingering feeling in the air, something uneasy. Ethan stared at her as if she was the most unique thing. There was no sign of uncomfortableness shown on her face, not even a twitch at the corner of her lips. 

“I know you were the one who bailed me out.” Ethan stated, ignoring her previous comment. She blinked, trying to fathom what he was saying.

“How did you-”

“I put two and two together.” He interrupted. “When you showed me your shrine, and when you didn’t ask about me being released. It was you, right?” 

She slowly nodded, Ethan following after. 

“I don’t think there’s anything wrong with you Ethan.” She admitted. She swallowed nervously as she waited for his response. It was a remark Ethan should’ve felt safe with, but his worry only grew. He knew what he was, what he did, and yet Mary treated it like it was as miniscule as a robbery. Ethan dryly chuckled. 

“I really don’t, Eth.” 

Ethan’s fingers twitched, and his brows furrowed. Only two people were ever allowed to call him that. 

“I think you only wanted justice for your brother. There’s nothing wrong with that. I would’ve done the same thing if I were in your shoes. I think you’re really special.” Mary continued to rant, not having a clue that Ethan was fuming not five feet away from her. 

He stayed silent as she talked, and his hands itched to reach for the push-button blade in his back pocket. He wouldn’t know who his victim would be, him or Mary. 

“Maybe it would’ve been easier if she died, you know?”

“What did you say?”

Silence. Silence took over both of them as Ethan stared, eyes wide at her. His eye twitched as he physically held himself back from leaping over to her and stabbing her. “I just mean- I know you tried to kill her, I saw the photos. Wouldn’t it have been better for you if you didn’t have the burden as well?”

“‘Burden’? You mean my son?” Ethan seethed through gritted teeth. He started seeing red again, just like earlier that night. Red, hot emotions coursed through his veins as he thought about Ollie, as he thought about Y/N, as he thought about Chad. No one else mattered. It was only them for Ethan. He knew he would hurt anyone who hurt them. 

“I didn’t mean that.” 

“I shouldn’t have come here,” Ethan muttered as he stood up. He stumbled a bit as he fully stood up, Mary was quick to stand up alongside him, helping him keep steady. Ethan jerked his arm away from her, stomping away towards the door. He had his hand on the door handle before Mary stopped him. 

“W-Wait, I’m sorry, don’t go.” She pleaded, placing her hand on his wrist. Ethan breathed heavily as he looked down to the contact. He slapped her hand away, barely opening the door before he felt her hands reach for the knife in his back pocket. He didn’t have time to react, before she swung the blade and stabbed herself in her thigh, lightly squealing as she did so. Ethan’s eyes widened at the action.

“What the fuck?” He yelled at her. Blood seeped through her pajama pants as the knife stayed plunged in her leg. She lightly smiled as she stared, feeling her adrenaline rushing through her. 

“If you leave, I’ll tell them you did this.” She threatened. The probability of them believing her over Ethan, knowing what he’s done, was more likely. Just because of that, Ethan had no care of what he would do in that exact moment. He lunged towards her, tackling her to the floor, causing her to grunt in pain. She kicked and thrashed as Ethan pinned her down, yanking the knife out of her thigh. She screamed in pain, not realizing the extent of what Ethan would take. 

A surge of emotions, familiar and unfamiliar, flooded Ethan’s mind as he raised the knife above his head. He saw Y/N on the floor below him, bloody and beaten. He saw Chad spewing out blood from his mouth as he cried. He hated it; he used to love the feeling killing gave him, but now, it only reminded him of all the hurt he caused the two people he loved the most. He let out a defensive yell, fully ready to swing the knife down into Mary’s soft, tender throat.

He hesitated. For a split second he hesitated and he saw Y/N again. Her teary eyes looking up at him on the ground, shirt stained with dust and blood. She was back in the theater, and so was Ethan.

“Do it.” She whispered. 

His confused expression put his mind in a haze. A tear rolled down his cheek, running down to his neck. He felt soft, alluring hands run up his back. He slightly turned his head, gasping hoarsely as he heard Y/N’s voice repeat the command in his ear. 

“Do it.”

She snaked her hand to his jaw, turning his head back to look down at Mary. He let out a choked sob as his eyes hovered over Mary. Chad’s screams echoed through his head, and Y/N dug her nails into Ethan’s shoulders. 

Mary laid there, on the dusty floors of the bookstore, knife punctured in her chest. Her once feminine and white pajamas are now stained with crimson. He sobbed and thrashed his body away from hers. The echoing of Y/N’s whispers and Chad’s screams made Ethan cover his ears with his palms as he banged one of his fists against his forehead. 

He sat in that same position for thirty minutes before leaving. He told himself he’d take care of her body the next day, but right now, for his own sanity, he needed to see Y/N and Chad. Make sure they were alive, just in case. 

Ethan was met with an obvious “I’ve been crying for two nights straight” Y/N after knocking once on the apartment door. Her eyes were red and puffy, yet she was a sight for sore eyes for him. Immediately he was met with a cautious, but loving embrace. 

She didn’t ask him anything, not where he was or what he had done, but somehow, deep down she knew. Chad was in her bed, with a solemn expression.  Maybe the old Ethan would’ve seen red at the sight, but all he wanted to do was jump in the bed and sleep. 

They didn’t ask about the small blood stains on his fingertips. Nor did they ask about why Ethan’s hands shook as he lifted the covers. He laid in between them, looking over at Ollie’s crib to see him peacefully sleeping. Resting his head back onto the bed, he felt Y/N curl up next to him. 

The fear and worry left his body as he felt her, really felt her, for the first time in a year. Ethan slid his hand near Chad’s, causing Chad to look at him. 

“I’m sorry.” Ethan whispered to him, moving his hand back. Chad grabbed his retreating hand, and  he held it in his own. 

“It’s okay.” He responded before closing his eyes again. Both of the boys’ hearts heated slightly faster, knowing the exchange wasn’t about Ethan’s touch.  He’d do better, he told himself. He’d do better for them.

(Taglist: @onlyreadz @lloyd907 @hearts4meeks @emitaylorsverson @depressedseaweed @athenalive @b3bybunny @aliciacat20 @whoaitsbibi @fallinforhappiness @Dabbin22 @leyla-1905 @sflame15-blog @i-love-milfs2 @zerodotzer0 @ahalliwell5 @gabbylovesreading @wishyouwere-sober @leaveitbythewave @itsnotino @elltheawkward @writinganything @buffhoshi @reysdriver @asapkyndall @champomiel @afro-hispwriter @ggothfirlcliquee @dellykins88 @halforangecuts @an0nymous-sm4t @yookayyo @arabellasolstice @justanotherkpopstanlol)

(a/n: Also if your name is in bold above, I am unable to tag you! If you still want to be tagged DM me or comment so I can find a way to tag you:) )

[haydenthewitch]

hey can we talk about stucky in thunderbolts* for a second SPOILERS OBVOUSLY but i NEED to talk about stucky + thunderbolts PLEASE LET ME OUT OF MY CAGEEEEE

but hayden, i hear you saying, steve is dead and is only metioned once in this movie, in a scene NOT RELATED TO BUCKY! how could you possibly make this about stu- WHAT DID BUCKY SEE WHEN HE WENT INTO THE VOID. LOOK ME IN THE EYES, DID HE SEE STEVE. DID HE SEE STEVE 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

becuse my interpertation of the "void trama rooms" is they have two conditons: 1) somthing you feel extremly guilty about and 2) something that makes you want to give up/ kill yourself

we see this with yelena's trama rooms centered aroud he black widdow training. first, she lures another young girl (presumably her frenid) into a death senerio. once she's broke out of that room, the void deems it to be useless becuse she's being too resilient against that greif/trama, so we see her break out ans go into the next training memory of hers where all of the other girls hands get whipped becuse she diassembled/reassembled the gun first. the same with the drinking scene we see. the void tries to FORCE vodka down her throught to make her more prone to giving up and wallowing in greif/guilt. same with the scene we see from walker (YUCK) earlier in the movie, where he is guilt ridden about being a deadbeat dad (and apparently NOT beating an innocent man to death in broad daylight but thats a whole nother post frenids TRUST) and he ALMOST KILLS HIMSELF!!! FROM THE GUILT. we also see this with lipstick-in-my-white-valnteno-bag when she's trying to manupulate bob. she sees her father being killed becuse of HER actions (guilt + yeah i think that's kill yourself worthy) SOOOOOOO

okay so here's where i'm like. STUCKY. right becuse like. at one point bucky goes into the void and experinces probably several greif rooms AND WE DON'T GET TO SEE IT. ANY OF IT. MARVEL YOU WILL RUE THE DAY. OOOOHHHHHH DON'T PISS ME OFFF MARVEL WRITERS udjdjdidhs but anyways. at one point he grumbles "yeah i'm fine. my life has been great, i wonder what i could have seen." AND I WAS LIKE YEAH BUD. WHAT DID YOU SEE. DID YOU SEE YOUR LONG LOST BOYFRENID. DID YOU SEE STEVE???? MARVEL PLEASE JUST WISPER INTO MY EAR AND TELL ME IF HE SAW STEVE.

okay let me divide this up. things he could have seen other than steve: fighting in world war two, killing pepole. that time he tore sam's wing off in CATWS and THREW HIM OFF THE FLYING HELACARIER NEARLY KILLING HIM. winter soilder training/brainwashing sessions (to parellel yelana) where he tortures someone bucky knew (as a test to see if the winter soilder will be loyal to hydra over men bucky used to know. the winter soilder will always be loyal to hydra untill steve.) MAYBE EVEN THAT TIME HE KILLED TONY'S PARENTS. HOWARD. WHO HE WORKED WITH (in passing).

things he could have seen related to steve: CATWS ADDITON: Punching him over and over while saying "Your. My. Mission." where bucky the winter soilder stabbed steve, the love of his life. steve looking so so so tired and saying "i'm not going to fight with you, buck." and begging him to "finish it." current bucky watches and thinks, oh my god. steve's so young here. he's over 100 years old, but this steve is still noble. still has too much fight in him. still picking fights wayyy bigger than him. he still has that relentless "i'll never give up" additude that is so classic steve. at first, bucky is incredibly comforted by seeing steve, even if it's bloodied, becuse he hears ths love of his life say it again. "i know you," and "i'm with you till the end of the line." buck cringes at every punch he hears the winter soilder land. but he's got a bad memory of this fight, and hearing all the things steve said to him to try and pull him out hurts- but oh it hurts in the way of crying at the end of a good book. it's cathardic. steve realy did feel this way about him once. and then bucky gets so sad that the thoughts start to creep in. maybe if he gave up and 'welcomed the void' (killed himself) he'd get go see steve again. he misses him, god, he misses him so bad. and then the memory loops, and bucky thinks. No, thats not the end. he pulls steve out of the river. he saves steve, and then steve finds him and saves him. thats's not the end of his story; matter of fact, he's got a team he needs to save. so they can do good. on the next loop he swan dives out of the big opening in the glass; it's how he breaks into the next trama room.

this post has been microwaving in my brain literaly since i saw the movie ON OPENING NIGHT BTW. i turned to my frenid and said "OH MY GOD WHAT IF HE SAW STEVE IN THE VOID" and i haven't been normal since.

*grabbing you by the sholders* WHAT IF HE SAW STEVE. AND WHAT IF THE VOID THREW STEVE AT HIM BUT HE RESISTED BECUSE STEVE'S BRAVERY INSPIRES HIM AND HE GOES "one day, we'll see each other again. But for now i got some kids to take care of. Miss you pal, till the end of the line." WHAT THE FUCK. DID HE SEE STEVE. DID HE SEE STEVEEEE 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[slowdancingalien]

you requested my head canons so now i’m requesting yours muahaha go fetch me some supernatural hcs

Fine...

Here are my headcanons. Don't like, don't read.

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

Castiel

(This gif made me giggle)

1. I know we all think Castiel is gay, but to me, he seems to be pansexual. He is an angel, I don't think he cares what gender his partners are. He does lean male, though.

2. I think he still feels guilty about blinding Pamela. That angel is all guilt built up inside him. So he often thinks about how he blinded her with his true form.

3. He avoids playing board games with Dean after The Incident. So he mainly plays board games with Sam and Jack.

4. He gets overstimulated very easily. But he never tells anyone anything because he's supposed to be this chrysler building sized angel who's won many wars.

5. I think he's constantly warm. All the time. Not because of all of the layers he wears, but more because I feel like the grace inside his vessel makes him unbelievably warm all the time. And there's no fixing it. He also smells like a campfire and old books.

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

Dean Winchester

1. He's my big dork, and I love him (jk heres the real ones)

1. Hates it when no one gets his references. Like he'll understand if it's Castiel but anyone else? He'll go on a rant about how "this generation" and "It's a classic how could you!"

2. His favorite scooby doo movie is wrestlemania mystery, don't @ me.

3. He's actually a fruity drink enjoyer, but mainly drinks beer in front of Sammy and Castiel to seem manly.

4. Can't stand drying dishes. He hates it with a passion.

5. Has once attempted to use candy corn as teeth so he could walk up to Sam and smile, only for it to be candy corn.

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

Sam Winchester

(Oh my pretty girl ): )

1. He grew out his hair because of how much he liked He-Man as a kid.

2. Hates washing dishes because of how mucky the water can get. So he'll happily be Dean's dish dryer.

3. The reason why he's so deathly afraid of clowns was because Dean sat him down and made him watch It from 1986.

4. I love both sides of the "Sam is transgender" spectrum so much, but heres an MTF headcanon. Jess helped her learn makeup for the first time.

5. The reason why he's so possessive of his stuff (i.e his laptop) is because he never really had stuff of his own. He's never had that freedom to be able to just.. have his own stuff and his own privacy until he went to college.

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

Thats it! Thank you to @vendettaischreonyaoi for the request!

[shadyfestivalperfection]

The Forever You Forgot~1

Summery: A six year old girl named Nadia Barnes born with a condition called 65 roses uncovers the story on how her dad-Bucky Barnes met her missing mother by narrating her the story and nothing remains the same after Nadia finds out the truth about her mother.

Characters: Bucky Barnes x f!Reader

Note:This story is based on the movie ‘Hi papa’. This story is like what if Bucky Barnes was in this situation that the male and female lead faced in the movie ‘Hi papa’. To be honest I am absolutely obsessed with this movie and I could help but write a Bucky Barnes version of it. I would totally recommend everyone to watch this movie and get some tissues with you before you start watching.

||Master list||

Chapter 1: Late Nights And Fairy Tales

(Bucky’s pov)

I bid everyone goodbye as I left the building in a hurry, the door shutting behind me with a quiet click. Almost a decade ago, I had started this support group—something for soldiers who had fought wars, for those who had been experimented on by HYDRA. It was meant to help them heal, to give them a place where they could talk, where they could remember they were human, not just weapons. Sam helped me build it. Hell, he was the reason I even believed I could be something more than what HYDRA made me. Without him, I wouldn’t be here—I’d still be lost in my own head, fighting ghosts that weren’t real anymore.

I walked down the streets, my steps quick, my mind still lingering on the meeting. It wasn’t easy, talking about the past, but it was necessary. For them. For me.

Stopping near the gates of the school, I spotted my daughter, Nadia, standing there, her small figure unmoving. She saw me, walked forward, shoved her backpack into my hands, and then raised her arms up—her silent demand for me to pick her up.

I did, resting her against my hip. “Hey, doll, what’s wrong?” I asked, noticing the little frown pulling at her lips.

She didn’t answer. Just leaned her head against my shoulder.

I sighed, deciding I’d ask her about it later. Maybe after dinner.

When we reached home, Sam was already there, coming from the kitchen with an apron on. He crossed his arms when he saw us. “You guys are late. Dinner’s almost ready. Get freshened up, and I’ll serve it.”

Nadia grabbed her bag from me and stomped up the stairs, her small feet making heavy sounds against the wood before she slammed her door shut.

Sam raised an eyebrow. “What’s wrong with her?”

“I don’t really know,” I admitted, rubbing the back of my neck. “I guess I was kinda late picking her up. Maybe that’s why she’s mad.”

“Ask her during dinner,” he said, disappearing back into the kitchen.

I nodded, but I already had a feeling whatever was bothering her wasn’t just that.

Dinner was quieter than usual. Nadia sat next to Sam, picking at her food, while I sat across from them. I glanced between the two before breaking the silence. “Nadia, sweetheart, everything okay? You’ve been upset since you got home.”

She set her fork down and looked up at me, her little brows furrowed.

“There’s this boy in my class,” she said.

I choked on my food, coughing as I looked at Sam, who mirrored my wide-eyed expression.

“Uh… doll, you gotta be more specific,” I said cautiously.

“His name is Liam,” she continued, crossing her arms. “He just transferred to our school. And he beat me—the topper of my class—by one percent! He’s smarter than me and I can’t allow that!”

I let out a slow breath, my shoulders relaxing. Beside me, Sam stifled a laugh.

“Honey, it’s okay if you’re not the smartest one,” Sam said, ever the wise one. “Marks aren’t everything. It’s the experiences that teach you in life.”

Nadia stood up, her plate in her hands. “You don’t understand. My reputation is at risk!”

She walked off, placing her plate in the sink before heading to her room, Alpine—the white cat with striking blue eyes—cradled in her arms.

The second she was out of sight, Sam burst into laughter.

I shot him a look. “What?”

Between chuckles, he shook his head. “You thought she had a boyfriend.”

“What? No.”

“You did! I saw your face when she mentioned a boy.”

I rolled my eyes, ignoring him as I pushed up my sleeves and started washing the dishes.

A little while later, I made my way to Nadia’s room. She was sitting on her bed, a book held up in front of her.

“Read me a story, Dad!” she said, patting the space beside her.

I sat down, took the book from her tiny hands, and flipped it open.

“Once upon a time, there was a king of a beautiful kingdom—”

“Wait! Dad, who should I imagine as the king?” she interrupted.

I smirked. “Me.”

She grinned. “And there was a beautiful princess—”

“That’s me!” she announced proudly.

“Yes, obviously,” I said, chuckling.

I read to her for a while, my voice steady, calm. It was one of my favourite moments—these quiet nights, just me and her, the world shut out.

“…And then the king and the princess lived happily ever after. The end,” I said, closing the book.

“That’s it?” she asked, tilting her head.

“That’s it,” I confirmed. “Why?”

She hesitated before speaking. “There’s no mother in this story either?”

My chest tightened. I stood up, placing the book back on the shelf, ignoring the weight of her question. Instead, I walked over to her drawer, pulled out the small box filled with her medicine, and sat back down.

“Come on, it’s time for your pills,” I said.

She pouted. “Please, Dad. Tell me Mom’s story. Otherwise, I won’t take them.”

I sighed, running a hand down my face. I hated this part.

After a moment, I said, “When you beat Liam and become the topper of your class again, then I’ll tell you your mom’s story.”

A smile spread across her face. “Promise?”

I nodded, opening the box and handing her the pill with a glass of water. Once she was done, I tucked her in, turned on the oxygen cylinder next to her bed, and adjusted the nasal cannula.

“Goodnight, doll,” I murmured.

“Goodnight, Dad,” she whispered back.

I turned off the light and stepped into the hallway, only to find Sam standing there, arms crossed, leaning against the wall.

“How long are you gonna keep the truth from her?” he asked quietly.

“She’s not ready yet,” I said, my voice barely above a whisper.

Sam shook his head. “Bucky, you can’t keep this hidden forever. When you’re not here, she asks me about her mother. What am I supposed to tell her?”

I didn’t answer. I couldn’t.

Instead, I let the silence settle between us, the ghosts of the past clawing at the edges of my mind.

She wasn’t ready.

And maybe… neither was I.

________

After Sam’s warning, I sat on the cream-coloured sofa in the living room, staring at a framed picture on the coffee table. It was one of my favorites—a snapshot of me, Sam, and Nadia. She was in the middle, grinning like she had just won a battle, her tiny hands clutching onto both of ours like she’d never let go.

Sam walked into the room, his voice pulling me from my thoughts. “The online meeting with Nadia’s doctor is in a few hours.”

I nodded, not looking away from the photo. He didn’t press further, just sighed and headed toward his room.

Nadia was born with cystic fibrosis, an inherited, life-threatening lung disorder. And it was slowly killing my six-year-old daughter.

There was no cure. The only thing that could save her was a lung transplant.

I love Nadia more than life itself, and I’d do anything to protect her. Since the day she was born, I’ve met with specialists all over the world, searching for any breakthrough, any treatment, anything to stop this condition from stealing her from me.

She’s my whole world.

And I can’t imagine a world without her.

———-

(Author’s pov)

Since Bucky’s promise, Nadia had been studying harder than ever. Determined to beat Liam and reclaim her place at the top of the class, she poured over her books day and night. But it wasn’t just about grades—it was about what she would win in return. The one thing she had always wanted.

Her mother’s story.

Nadia knew everything about her father’s past. She knew he had been born in 1917, that he had grown up in Brooklyn alongside Steve Rogers. She knew how he had been captured by HYDRA, turned into the Winter Soldier, and forced to do things he could never take back. She knew about the Avengers, about Thanos, about the blip. She knew every part of her father’s history.

Except for one thing.

Her mother.

No matter how many times she asked, no matter how many ways she tried to get an answer, she was always met with silence. And she didn’t understand why.

On weekends, Bucky and Sam took Nadia to the Super Soldier Support Group. It was a place where people who had lived through war, experiments, and unimaginable pain could come together and heal. Bucky had built it for them, but it had become a second home for Nadia too.

It was there, one day, that she overheard the staff whispering about her mother.

“She abandoned her family for another man,” one said.

“No, I heard Bucky used to hurt her,” another murmured.

None of it was true.

But the rumors never stopped.

And every time Nadia heard them, she felt that same sadness creep in—the same hollow feeling that came with never knowing the truth.

Who was her mother?

And why did no one want to tell her?

-to be continued

[aziraphales-library]

Hello and thank you for being a great source of fics! I read a super sweet outsider AU that included Crowley singing Abba songs and I need more! Are there any Abba themed fics you would recommend to us?

Hi! Here are some fics featuring ABBA songs/references, and a couple of Mamma Mia! fics...

The Stars Were Bright, My Dear Boy by not_joeys_secret_account (T)

It’s 1977 and Aziraphale and Crowley go to see Star Wars in the theatre, and, surprisingly, Aziraphale has never heard of ABBA

And Everything Is You by acetonitril (T)

Once a week, Crowley joins the local pub's karaoke night to sing an ABBA song. Aziraphale doesn't know about this. This is the story of Aziraphale finding out. Also, there's a bunch of students who might or might not be involved.

How You Thrill Me by ingafterdark (E)

There were three things Crowley would remember about this movie. The deception-driven chaos, the blastedly delightful musical numbers, and the idle weight of Aziraphale’s hand on Crowley’s thigh, which grew ever-more insistent from about the half-hour mark. Or: The night in the South Downs when a certain Angel debauched a certain Demon as Mamma Mia! played in the background.

I Believe In Angels by Raphaela Crowley (T)

Crowley and Aziraphale travel to a Greek island under false pretenses. Aziraphale's a bit worried about the morality of the situation, while Crowley just wants that blasted ABBA song to not be stuck in his head any more. Sophie S. wonders if the father she's never known is Sam Carmichael or just some guy in sunglasses named Anthony Cowwley.

One Look And You're Hypnotized by quiltedspacemittens (T)

“What are you doing in Greece?” Aziraphale asks, with distanced politeness, as the silence between them stretches a moment too long. Crowley ambles, one step behind him. “’M here on business. Supposed to tempt some poor woman to engineer a decades-long inheritance and property tax evasion scheme. Something about her ex-boyfriends.” “I see. And she’s on Kalokairi?” Kalokairi, Greece, 1977. One moustachioed demon on business, one clean-shaven principality on holiday, and one island in need of a little divine intervention. A Mamma Mia!-themed Tony fic written for Stayin' Julive aka Tony Month. Hypothetically updates every Wednesday in July. Title from "Angeleyes" by ABBA.

dancing queen (guaranteed to blow your mind) by Quilly (T)

Warlock has a secret, and it's that he invited three former staff members from his estranged parents' household to his wedding in the hopes that one of them is the one Nanny is still in love with. Crowley is just wondering what entity he pissed off to make three of his old flames show up the day before his adopted kid's wedding.

Do You Like ABBA? by Matcha_Tea_and_Other_Delights (T)

“I heard there’s going to be a meteor shower tonight.” The boy tells Aunt Lilith. “Oh?” She says in response, still a little unfamiliar with some of the earthly phrases and customs. “Yeah, stars falling from the sky and you get to make a wish, it’s great. Might stay up in my room watching them for a while.” Aunt Lilith looks up at the sky too, this time with an odd sense of woe coloring her features. “Falling stars, huh?” Or: Seven years after the events of Not-mageddon, things start to gear up for the Second Coming: Supreme Archangel Raphael would sound the alarms, a flight is boarded, as a swarm of locusts envelope the Earth. Everything is destroyed, with nothing left standing. The End. …yeah that’s not gonna happen. For starters, Satan is missing. Or or: Like the ones before them, it’s up to an angel and a demon to try and stop the world from ending. Third time’s the charm isn’t it? (Basically, what if Good Omens 3 went like this?)

- Mod D

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

tuesday again 11/12/2024

this one's a bit short. i am now thirty and still unemployed (ten months this week) ://// if you enjoy the tuesdayposts and are not maxed out on your charitable donations for other causes (american healthcare access, healthcare access in other places, war relief, any number of other good causes) i am going to be $300 short for december rent. here is my paypal.

listening

listening to a lot of pete seeger, for my health. there are about one zillion recordings of Old Man Atom, all ever so slightly different. it starts off as a perky gee-whiz-science! tune and continues frog marching the listener along in an increasingly jaunty manner. it's

Then the cartel crowd put on a show To turn back the clock on the UNO To get a corner on atoms and maybe extinguish Every darned atom that can't speak English Down with foreign-born atoms! America for American atoms! I hold this truth to be self-evident That all men may be cremated equal!

it's very depressing to listen to early anti-nuclear protest songs and realize they hold even more true today! song's a bop tho!

-

reading

the feds nabbed someone allegedly related to the semi-dire Snowflake data leaks that have been ongoing throughout the year (Santander Bank, AT&T, Ticket Master, Neiman Marcus, etc).

this guy has been a real thorn in krebs' side for a year or so and participates in some of the worst corners of the internet, which explains the adversarial nature of the writeup. i read through the whole thing going "yeah this guy is Very annoying but why is krebs so mad at him" and then got to the bottom section about other activities. italicized OH moment in real life but bad.

-

watching

continuing noirvember with The Maltese Falcon (1941, dir. Huston).

The Maltese Falcon is a 1941 American film noir in which a San Francisco private detective deals with three unscrupulous adventurers, all seeking a jewel-encrusted falcon statuette.[3] Written and directed by John Huston[3] in his directorial debut, the film was based on the 1930 novel The Maltese Falcon by Dashiell Hammett and is a remake of the 1931 film of the same name.[4][5][6] It stars Humphrey Bogart as private investigator Sam Spade, Mary Astor as his femme fatale client, and as villains Peter Lorre and Sydney Greenstreet.

i have two really snotty thoughts to get out of my brain: the modern letterboxed reviews like "i liked this but the homophobia ruined it" weak. all of you are WEAK.

and

i appreciate the work of the tumblrinas trying to queer this story in a more 2020s friendly way. however. sam spade canonically calls someone a slur for using cologne that he deems too feminine. the noir detective series you want is Philip Marlowe, who is at least homophobic in interesting and less physically violent ways.

anyway! gorgeous gorgeous movie. mary astor goes toe to fucking toe with bogey in every scene. a very frantic and frightened woman who is one jump ahead of the pathway crumbling behind her at all times. but she takes the jump and makes it! every time! except for the most important one!!!

-

playing

having a normal one with 12 hours of powerwash simulator

new genshin update rapidly approacheth. there's a lot happening in this screenshot. accidentally careened right past this npc, with one bullet for the poor low-level slime in the background, floaty blue pet in tow. the npc wanted me to deliver something to her sister who is visible under the big tree in the background. i love early area spaghetti code.

-

making

deep cleaned my house again bc i had people over for my birthday, which was a very lovely and very drunk evening of star wars on in the background while we played trivia. not how i expected to enter my thirties! i am not in the life circumstances i expected to be in my thirties, i do not have the life i expected to have in my thirties, etc. feeling a little maudlin and need to do crafts about it but also all the crafts in my home are not quite right!

[animentality]

I'll never forget when they made Captain America so gay for his childhood best friend that they had to desperately back peddle the next movie by throwing in some random generic hot blonde lady who dry humps Bucky in one fight scene and then makes out with Captain America for another scene before never ever being mentioned in any fucking marvel movie again.

It was also funny because she was the niece of the girl he used to wanna bang.

That he literally met at that old bitch's funeral.

Like genuinely hysterical.

They should've had him hooking up with Peggie's hot granddaughter. Why the fuck not, right, if you're gonna be weird about it anyway?

You already had him literally picking up a new chick at the funeral of the chick he used to be into.

They should've just showed Captain America mowing through DC pussy like a married Republican senator, actually. Except I will generously say that Cap would at least pick girls of legal age.

I will also remember the hilarious scene where he made out with the niece of his former love interest because it has Sam and Bucky nodding approvingly and bro fisting as they watch.

They should've gone a step further.

Captain America makes out with three chicks, and then he gets in the car and they're like yooo brooo that's some fine ass pussy you got there, and then they all headbutt each other and high five, grab some brewskis.

Yeah.

That would've been better.

No homo the movie.

Hilarious because Cap was already starting a civil war just for the sake of his best friend, like.

you understand that adding a hottie for him to kiss for five seconds wasn't gonna no homo that.

you had to go farther.

[justanotherperson1]

Apparently Sam died between the third and fourth movies, and Optimus saw it/had to watch himself fail to protect him. When Op startles back to life in Cade's barn he says things along the line of "No, no!" and "Run, Sam!". And in the fifth it's hinted to that Sam is dead, the old dude being the last of the Witwickens. Etc.

Anyways, not me thinking of the angst possibilities of Bay OP looking at Jack from TFP and remembering Sam and how he failed to protect him, dying at the hands of his own kind just because he knew the bots.

Sam.

He was just another name added to the long list of beings who died for him.

That’s what Optimus kept trying to tell himself.

Yes, Sam was the first human he had met, and like most he encountered, his time was cut short by non other than himself. How was the boy any different than the thousands that had died in Chicago? The countless unseen bodies to have gone cold, much like the numberless faceplates he had watch draw still apon Cybertron?

Even with the sentiment echoing in his aching processor, he couldn’t help but think of the beaten and bruised adolescent, spattered with his own blood carrying the Allspark into chaos, into uncertainty with a courage that could not be shaken. The boy who had pressed the cube into Megatron’s chest saving his life. The boy who stood for his kind when others of his own turned on him, that same unshaken confidence glinting in his youthful eyes.

The boy who, too, lost his warmth in his servos. His body becoming slack like a baby bird who simply had nothing left to give.

Optimus couldn’t help but think of the boy as another, Jack, partly hidden behind the frame of his counterpart accepted the Prime’s Keycard to Delta Sigma.

Another young boy being sent into endless chaos with nothing but his legs to carry him and a sliver of determination to hold on to burning in his own youthful eyes.

His Delta Sigma was raided during the war, blasted to splinters.

Now Optimus simply prayed, for the sake of himself, his younger self, the boy would still have something to find. That things could be better here.

But by Primus, he hoped above all else he did not watch himself seal the fate of such a familiar face.